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Mitchell’s WWE Monday Night Raw Report! (1/8/18)

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All images courtesy of the WWE’s official Twitter

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Absolution VS Bayley & Sasha Banks w/ Mickie James; Bayley & Sasha win.
  • WOKEN Matt Hardy VS Curt Hawkins; Hardy wins.
  • WWE Cruiserweight Championship: Enzo Amore VS Cedric Alexander; Alexander wins by count out, Enzo retains the Cruiserweight Championship.
  • The Bar VS ???; Titus Worldwide wins.
  • Samoa Joe VS Rhyno w/ Heath Slater; Joe wins.
  • Asuka VS ???; no contest.
  • Six Man Tag: The Balor Club VS Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins & Jason Jordan; Balor Club wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Samoa Joe says The Big Dog’s Yard is in HIS World.

The Destroyer came after Roman Reigns’ Intercontinental Championship last week on Raw, but even with threat of No Champion’s Advantage, Roman retained his title. Can this fighting champion hold onto his title all the way through the Road to the Royal Rumble?

 

Roman Reigns heads to the ring.

Memphis has a mixed reaction to The Big Dog as he saunters out and grabs a mic. “After all his hype, you’d think Samoa Joe would be ready for me.” He wasn’t. When it was time to put up or shut up, Joe was silenced and Roman is still champion. And not because Roman is better but because he was fighting for Dean Ambrose. If you mess with one Shield brother, you mess with all of them! That was last week. This week, it’s– Jason Jordan?

The Gold-Blooded Son and one-half of the Raw Tag Team Champions heads right to the ring with a mic, to Memphis’ displeasure. Jordan compliments Roman’s match, he got “goosebumps.” He feels like he’s finally a part of something bigger. On behalf of Seth Rollins, Jordan would like to say that Roman proved this is his Yard. And thank you. He wants to Shield fist bump?

Seth Rollins comes out to clear this up.

Look, Jason, Rollins appreciates this. But he still has a lot to learn. Rollins taught him about teamwork, which worked, but this week… “We are really gonna have to work on your timing here, brother.” ROllins knows Jordan means well but he’s stepping on Roman’s moment. But this is all their moment. They all had problems with Joe and Roman took care of it. Jordan and Rollins are champions alongside Roman, and “we run this show!” We? You’re teamed with Seth, Roman is The Guy. “And we’re all champions!” They can take on as many men and teams as possible. This may not be the Shield, but this could be the “most-dominant three man group in all of WWE.” Finn Balor & The Club would like to differ!

Jordan is excited, clearly, but does he really think he’s part of the most dominant trio in WWE? Balor ran with The Good Brothers for ten years before Jordan even knew Angle was his daddy. Burn! Memphis trolls Jordan with “Who’s your daddy!?” The Balor Club has been running a long time, and you can even use the WWE Network to see the new special all about it. When Finn came to WWE, the Good Brothers stood alone for a time. They were Raw Tag Team Champions, Finn became the inaugural Universal Champion. Too Sweet. They were doing their own thing, but now they’ve reunited to take over. The year 2018 is the Year of Balor Club! Jordan laughs that off. This is the Champion’s Club. Get it? Is that the cute new version of The Shield? Must be, because the Lunatic Fringe isn’t out here. We have the Architect, the Big Dog, and… What’s the word? NERD!

Jordan shoves Gallows, we’re about to have a brawl! Rollins keeps the peace between his own side, Kurt Angle comes out to help. He makes this fight between champions and great friends the main event! “Oh it’s true, it’s DAMN true!” Which side will hold it together to come out the superior trio?

 

Absolution VS Bayley & Sasha Banks w/ Mickie James!

The Women’s Royal Rumble is set to make history, and every woman from Raw and SmackDown hopes to gain momentum before the big day. Will it be Gladiator and Golden Rose or the Hugger and Legit Boss getting a step ahead of the pack?

The bell rings and Mandy starts against Bayley. Bayley gets headlock control, Mandy powers out and runs Bayley over. Mandy trash talks, runs, and catches Bayley mid-jump. She puts Bayley in a corner but Bayley turns things around to unload a mudhole stomp. Mandy turns things around on Bayley and gives furious forearms. She trash talks Sasha, Bayley kicks back. Mandy scoops and slams then covers, TWO. She keeps on Bayley with a neck-wrench, Paige liking what she sees. Fans rally and Bayley gets up but Mandy throws her down by her hair. Bayley gets to a corner, Mandy trash talks too long, Bayley runs her over with a lariat. Bayley goes to tag Sasha but Mandy gets her a sucker punch. Mandy trash talks again, Bayley gives her a saido suplex! Mandy is bailed out by Absolution, we go to break.

Raw returns, Mandy throws Sasha down by her hair. They speed up, Sasha hip-tosses Mandy down to then give double knees! Cover, TWO, Sasha backs Sonya off. Mandy hits Sasha back with forearms, trash talks some more, and pie-faces Sasha. “This is Absolution, baby!” SLAP from Sasha! Sasha gives a shot to Sonya, too, but then Mandy hits a big knee strike! Cover, TWO, and Absolution gets frustrated. Tag to Sonya, she gives right hands to Sasha in the corner, then martial arts kicks.

Sonya snapmares and bodyscissors Sasha around the ribs. Paige likes what she sees, but fans rally for Sasha. Sasha tries a cover, TWO and Sonya has to let go. She slows Sasha down with a body shot, then dares her to put her hair up and square up! Body shot after shot from Sonya, she is all fired up now. She drags Sasha back to Absolution’s corner, tag to Mandy. Sasha fights back, Mandy clubs her down then chokes her on the rope. Mandy stretches Sasha on the ropes, tags to Sonya, they kick vice Sasha down. Paige applauds while Sonya covers, TWO. Sonya taunts Bayley, Sasha fights back, Sonya slows her down again. Sonya whips but Sasha kicks her away, double clotheslines bring both women down! Paige is furious while the fans rally. Hot tag to Mandy, and she intercepts Sasha before knocking Bayley down. Mandy brings Sasha back to ropes, Sonya gets a hot shot on her behidnt eh referee’s back! Small package surprise from Bayley, TWO! Bayley throws Sonya out, then throws hands. Mandy puts Sasha in a corner and whips corner to corner, but Sasha reverses! Bank Statement in full!

Mandy taps, Banks & Bayley win! Paige storms the ring but the best friends and Mickie get away. If the other women of Raw can pull Absolution apart, can they make sure Paige and her allies don’t win the Rumble?

 

Cedric Alexander and Goldust meet backstage.

Tonight’s Cruiserweight Championship, the Bizarre One encourages the #1 contender to “eat lightning ‘n’ crap thunder!” Then he reconsiders, considering that sounds unpleasant. Alexander thanks Goldust for the peptalk, but he doesn’t need one. He’s living the dream, and won’t let anyone stand in his way. Goldust can see his dream, but the one thing in the way is not Enzo Amore, or The ‘Zo Train. It’s Alexander. Alexander is in control, no one else. Thanks, Goldy. Now go out there and show them… Goldust’s voice can’t handle that. But Enzo won’t be able to handle Alexander! With Goldust’s faith behind him, can Alexander finally shut up the Trash Talker Skywalker?

 

WOKEN Matt Hardy VS Curt Hawkins!

The WOKEN Wisdom finally hits the ring in the WWE! Will Hardy DELETE Mr. Loss Streak once and for all?

The bell rings, Hawkins is very wary of the WOKEN One. Hawkins stays at the ropes, then sucker punches Hardy. He wrenches Hardy’s arm, Hardy bites Hawkins’ hand! Hardy hits back and then clubs away in the corner. Elbow to the back of the head then a swinging neckbreaker, Hardy is fired up. He German Suplexes Hawkins into buckles!

Hawkins elbows back, then hops up, but misses the crossbody. Hardy gives Hawkins DELETE DELETE buckle bumps, before the corner clothesline and Side Effect! Hardy declares DELETE before Twist of Fate! WOKEN Hardy wins, and Hawkins loses again.

But then Bray Wyatt wishes to respond, by appearing in the ring! The two beings of supernatural power stare each other down. And then laugh. And laugh, and laugh. Who will have the last laugh when the Great War is over?

 

“Ladies and Gentlemen: Elias.”

The Drifter is in Memphis, and they don’t want him here. Elias doesn’t care, he still plays his guitar. “Now c’mon, that was good.” Elias has walked all over the world, met a million people and heard a million stories. One truth is that WWE stands for “Walk With Elias!” Tonight’s Raw is special, and there’s no better place to celebrate than Memphis. So please, silence cellphones, hold applause, this came from the heart. Elias plays again, “It’s January 8th, Elvis’ birthday–” Wait, what’s wrong with Elvis? He’s The King and Graceland’s only miles away. “There’s a star on the way, who has taken over the entertainment biz”, here comes the Miz!

Yes, the Hollywood A-Lister is back! He and his Miztourage head to the ring, and Memphis welcomes him back! “Did you miss me?” Yes! In that case, here is an impromptu episode of Miz TV! Marine 6 wrapped, the holiday tour is over, Miz is back on Raw! He is the glue that holds Raw together, and he thanks two people for keeping him in our minds: Bo Dallas & Curt Axel! They are living embodiments of a New Year’s Resolution done right.

The year 2017 was the best year of Axel’s life, and he thanks Miz for that. Having Miz’s wisdom was like winning the Mizzies, and Bo thanks him for that. They even start the chant, “Thank you, Miz!” Bo got Miz a present: a framed photo of himself. It was Bo’s personal night light. Axel does Bo one better! He takes off his jacket to give it right to Miz. Bo gives Miz his watch! Axel gives Miz his shoes. Miz gets them to stop fighting, and to sit down. Miz agrees, 2017 was an incredible year. He was an Intercontinental Champion and made everything he touched turn to gold! But Miz didn’t forget about The Shield. Their attack on him was an “indignity”, and Roman is merely borrowing that Intercontinental Championship! Miz wanted that title to be bigger than him, but Roman has failed. Miz will have his first child in 2018, and will become the longest reigning “single greatest” Intercontinental Champion of all time! The Miz will be the iconic IC Champion of this generation!

“So, Roman Reigns. I hope you enjoyed your time in the spotlight I allowed you to have.” Miz is going to end it. He is back, and is coming for that championship. Believe that. Mic drop from The Miz, can he follow through on his promise to The Big Dog?

 

The Balor Club talks backstage.

Enough nostalgia, let’s look to the future and talk strategy. They are talking strategy. Instead of throwing them back with Tama, Fale and the others, time to throw down with Reigns, Rollins & Jordan. Well alright, that’s a good point. New situation, same tactics. Just don’t let Anderson near Saigon brides. He’s already got a smoking hot Asian wife. True. Time to show the world 2018 is the Year of Balor Club. Too Sweet, fOreVER!

 

WWE Cruiserweight Championship: Enzo Amore VS Cedric Alexander!

The Certified G is no longer ill with the flu, now he must face his #1 contender in the Carolina Kid. He thanks Nia for the chicken noodle soup, but he did still watch last week’s Raw. And he saw The ‘Zo Train face Alexander and… Goldust? Well that’s the closest Alexander’s getting to gold in 2018! There’s only one word to describe him: S A W F T!

The bell rings, Enzo keeps Alexander back with jabs, then cowers at the ropes. Alexander backs off, but rocks Enzo with a right! Enzo is dazed, but he manages to slip out of the ring. The Bonafied Stud is upset, he trash talks, but then runs away from Alexander. Alexander rocks him with a swing kick, seeing through the cat and mouse. Nia Jax is watching as Alexander yanks Enzo off the ropes and dares the champ to fight.

Enzo crawls away but Alexander is right on him. The referee counts them both, so Alexander lets up, but Enzo dumps Alexander down and out! Alexander writhes in pain while Enzo gets back in the ring and we go to break.

Raw returns, Enzo grinds Alexander with a chinlock. They roll but Enzo holds on and squeezes Alexander tighter. Fans rally, Alexander feeds off the energy and gets up to then throws Enzo to buckles. Nia looks worried as Enzo flounders. Enzo sticks out a foot and drives Alexander down, cover, TWO! The Certified G keeps on Alexander by wrapping him int a modified clutch and clubbing away with crossface punches. Enzo shoves Alexander’s face into the mat, runs and dropkicks him, cover, TWO. Back to the chinlock, Alexander reaches for ropes. Fans rally again, Alexander gets up, and powers Enzo to a corner. Alexander backs off then runs back in, but into a knee. Enzo goes up, flies, but into a dropkick! Both men are down, Enzo crawls to ropes. Enzo rests against them before getting to his feet, Alexander just kip-ups. Alexander rallies, blocks a kick to give a back elbow. Alexander handsprings, to hit the Neuralizer enziguri!

TWO! Alexander can’t believe that didn’t work, Enzo is busted open! Alexander won’t let off, Enzo resists the Lumbar Check and then sends Alexander out, only for another kick to the face! Springboard lariat! Enzo rolls all the way out, Alexander FLIES! A major crash landing, Enzo’s foot is in pain! The medics come in to check Enzo while the ring count climbs up past 7. Alexander gets in, but Enzo lets it go out! Alexander wins with a count out, but that won’t get him the title, Enzo is still Cruiserweight Champion. When will Alexander get another chance at Enzo’s championship? Is Enzo even in shape to be champion after tonight?

 

Medics attend to Enzo Amore in the back.

That’s when Nia Jax visits to check on him. Enzo’s good, don’t worry about him. But that’s jsut a brave face. Is Enzo okay to compete?

 

The Bar visits Kurt Angle in his office.

They want their rematch for the Raw Tag Team Championships. But, Jordan is in a Six Man Tag to keep him away? They smell something: favoritism. When are they getting their rematch? Angle smells opportunity. They will have their match, at the Royal Rumble PPV. Sheamus & Cesaro are glad to hear it! As for tonight, they want competition. Well, head to the ring and meet your competition. The Bar heads down, who is Angle going to send them?

The Miz now visits Angle in his office.

Miz TV got the USA Network executives’ attention. Miz has a new unscripted series featuring himself and Maryse. He knows how to run a show, USA Network knows how to run a show, but apparently Angle doesn’t. Angle can give Miz his Intercontinental Championship rematch, on the 25th Anniversary episode of Raw. Angle agrees to give him that match. Can the A-Lister dethroned The Big Dog in two weeks?

 

Alexa Bliss talks with Asuka.

The Goddess isn’t here to talk fighting. The Empress was lucky to win against her, because Nia Jax is going to make Asuka pay for what she called her. Will the Brutal Beauty be ready for Asuka this time?

 

The Bar VS ???

The Celtic Gladiator & Swiss Cyborg were told to head to the ring, so they have. Who is it that the Olympic Gold Medalist has chosen to be their competition? None other than Titus Worldwide~!

The bell rings and the Real Deal CEO Titus starts against Sheamus. Sheamus doesn’t take him seriously as he keeps side-stepping and grinning. Titus rushes him, Sheamus gets to ropes, then gives him a cheap shot. Sheamus puts on a headlock, Titus powers out, then runs Sheamus over! Titus brings Sheamus over, tags in Apollo Crews, who gives Sheamus double ax handles. Sheamus powers Crews to his corner, tag to Cesaro for a running European Uppercut. He and Crews brawl but the EuroUpper rocks Crews down. Crews powers out of the chinlock and things speed up, dropkick drops Cesaro. Standing moonsault before the cover, TWO! Crews brings Cesaro up, Cesaro slips out of the suplex, tag to Sheamus. Crews whips but Sheamus pulls the ropes down, Crews crash lands and hurts his leg. Dana checks on Crews while The Bar boasts.

Sheamus gives Crews a big knee then throws him to the barriers. They return in the ring, Sheamus drags Crews and tags Cesaro. The Bar splits the wishbone, then Cesaro grinds Crews with a headlock. Cesaro keeps Crews grounded with a half-nelson, but Titus and the fans rally. Crews gets up, Cesaro tags to Sheamus, The Bar gives Crews the Bar Lariat. Sheamus adds a knee drop, covers, TWO! He keeps Crews grounded, Dana takes notes before cheering Crews on. The fans rally again, Crews works his way up and fights back. Sheamus slows him down with a knee, but Crews cradles, TWO. Sheamus misses in a corner and hits post! Cesaro tags in, hot tag to Titus! The Gator rallies on The Bar, boot for Cesaro! He fires up, lets out the barks, and squashes Cesaro in a corner before the powerslam, TWO! Titus keeps focus, dragging Cesaro up again. Sheamus distracts, Cesaro pounces and clobbers Titus. Cheap shot from Sheamus, tag in to Sheamus, they bring Titus up but Crews comes back in! He shoves Cesaro out and ASAIS him down, Titus rolls Sheamus, Titus Worldwide WINS! They shock The Bar, can they make major gains in the New Year? As for The Bar, how can they become Raw Tag Team Champions losing like this?

 

Memphis is Suplex City!

The Beast is back again after his confrontation with the Big Red Machine on last week’s Raw. The Advocate for the “reigning, defending, undisputed Universal Heavyweight Champion, BROCK LESNAR” hopes Memphis can appreciate the “credo in this industry” of “old school.” Heyman & Lesnar have respect for the Old School, but it won’t blind them to the fact that this industry is always in need of “new, fresh, innovative ways” to show the product. So forgive Heyman for being hypocritical, but there is something “very old school” that doesn’t help the product. Old school way of promoting a title match: find a challenger, a single man, to fight the champion. That one man must think they are the better man, and rise to be the new champion. But things have gotten away from that. It isn’t “who can defeat Lesnar?” It is “can Lesnar survive this scenario?” Heyman assures us, he isn’t complaining. Lesnar took the choke slam and sat upto laugh! The match is Lesnar VS Kane VS Strowman: Beast VS Machine VS Monster, aka Champion VS Challenger #1 VS Challenger #2. Lesnar does not walk into the Rumble facing “How will Lesnar survive?” He goes in with “Will Lesnar pin Kane or Strowman? Or will he just stack them up on top of each other and pin them both?” Lesnar is THE most dominant champion in the WWE, no one has proven themselves able to out-fight him. Another mic drop from the Advocate, he and the Beast go to leave, but out comes KANE!

The Big Red Machine ambushes The Beast and fights him all the way off the stage and to the open area off to the side. They end up going backstage now, brawling all the way, when STROWMAN blindsides them both! He hurls Lesnar into trunks, then hurls a trunk into Kane! The Monster Among Men isn’t done, he opens up a trunk to search for something. A grappling hook? The security beg he not do what’s going on in his mind, but he still throws that hook up over the rafters, to bring them down on Kane and Lesnar!

No one can believe what he has just down to Beast and Machine, will there even be a triple threat at the Royal Rumble?!

 

Raw returns to the wreckage backstage.

Medics arrived over the break to help Brock Lesnar and Kane out from under the structure Strowman brought down upon them. Paul Heyman could only watch as Lesnar was helped to a stretcher and wheeled away. Kane dragged himself away, but wasn’t in much better shape. As Lesnar was brought to an ambulance, Heyman apologized to his client. Meanwhile, Kane simply walked away into the shadows. Lesnar refused to leave but not even Heyman would allow him. Has Strowman crossed a line?

 

Samoa Joe VS Rhyno w/ Heath Slater!

This is more of The ManBeast trying lead by example to toughen the One Man Band up. Has he chosen the wrong example in The Destroyer?

Raw returns and the bell rings. The two men circle, tie up, and Joe throws fast forearms. He backs off, Rhyno comes back with right hands of his own. Rhyno whips but is reversed, Joe hits the back elbow and Pele! Slater coaches RHyno back up, Joe chops Rhyno into the corner. Rhyno throws heavy hands, Joe hits back just as hard. Joe shows Slater what he’s gonna learn as he crossface punches RHyno. A stiff chop and kick from Joe but Slater rallies the fans for Rhyno. Joe keeps chopping, Rhyno fires up slowly. Rhyno chops back, whips but Joe kicks him away, standing STO! Cover, TWO, Joe is annoyed. He brings Rhyno up again, atomic drop then the boot, back senton on top. Cover, TWO, Joe is growing frustrated. Joe brings Rhyno up again, and throws right hands. Rhyno throws hands back, fireman’s carry but Joe slips out, into the Coquina Clutch! Rhyno goes down, taps, Joe wins! Joe glares at Slater, perhaps Slater & Rhyno will think twice before trying to toughen up the hard way.

In-ring interview with Samoa Joe.

The Destroyer won here tonight, but he must still be stinging from last Raw’s loss. Last week was no loss in Joe’s book. Roman’s “little win” was a “Pyrrhic victory.” That is to say, a victory that comes at such a cost, it was practically a loss. Joe beat years of Roman’s career, and the “cracks in the foundation are coming.” Roman will crumble and fall, and Joe will be there to finish him.

Until then, Joe will pursue worthier prey: the Royal Rumble! The other 29 men entering, such as Randy Orton, Shinsuke Nakamura, and John Cena– Cena? When it comes to Joe’s career, John Cena is a name that he will never forget. In the Royal Rumble, Joe promises to eliminate Cena first. The ultimatum has been sent, how will the other 29 men respond?

 

Alexa Bliss finds Nia Jax.

How is Enzo? He’s fine, not that she cares. She does care, because she cares about Nia. Nia is strong, pretty, smart and her best friend. Nia can do so much, but Alexa is just worried Enzo is going to hold her back. Enzo doesn’t hold her back, he motivates her. That’s why Nia is entering the Women’s Rumble. Great! Alexa is sure she’ll win. But, everyone else thinks Asuka will win. Maybe if Nia takes Asuka out first, then wins the Rumble herself, it can be best friends at Wrestlemania! Oh c’mon, Alexa, even Nia knows she’s just upset over losing to Asuka. That’s not true! And, Asuka’s said stuff, so– “Can it, Bliss.” Nia and Asuka are headed for each other eventually. But, what did Asuka say? Assuming she said anything. Okay, well, look, Alexa doesn’t want Nia to get upset. What did she say!? Don’t shoot the messenger but… Asuka said Nia… *whisper whisper* Wait, she said that? Wait, was it in Japanese first? Because Asuka doesn’t speak English. The Goddess got caught in her scheming, will it come back to haunt her?

 

Asuka VS ???

The Empress of Tomorrow doesn’t sweat taking on 29 other women in the inaugural Women’s Royal Rumble, because nobody is ready for Asuka! However, Asuka wasn’t ready for Nia’s ambush! Electric Chair Drop from the top rope! The Brutal Beauty goes after Asuka more, rolling senton!

She has sent a message to the undefeated odds-on favorite, as well as the other 28 women in the Rumble. Which one of these two titans of the Women’s (R)Evolution will take the spotlight on the Road to Wrestlemania?

 

Six Man Tag: The Balor Club VS Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins & Jason Jordan!

One trio is Too Sweet, the other is golden with titles, but which one is truly the elite trio in the WWE?

The leader of the Balor Club starts against the Architect of the “Champion’s Club”, a rematch from their Universal Championship match. The two circle and tie up, Finn gets a waistlock to headlock takeover, Rollins headscissors and then reverses roles with Finn, popping out of headscissors himself. Rollins kicks low and whips but Finn reverses. Sunset flip rolled through, dropkick to cover, TWO. Finn brings Rollins over, tag to Anderson. The Machine Gun gives Rollins a side backbreaker, cover, TWO. Anderson keeps Rollins grounded with an armlock, but Rollins stands up. Anderson tags Gallows, double back suplex escaped, The Big Dog tags in. He and Rollins rally on the Good Brothers, but then Finn comes in to rally on them. Finn runs, but into double shoulders. Rollins throws Finn out, The Good Brothers take a Drive-by Dropkick then Rollins slingshots onto Finn! The Shield Brothers are fired up, the Gold-Blooded Son comes in to excitedly celebrate before we go to break.

Raw returns, and Finn keeps Rollins grounded with an armlock while fans rally for him. Rollins gets up and fights back with right hands, but Finn keeps him from tagging out by whipping him to The Club’s corner. Rollins knocks the Good Brothers down then gives Finn a buckle shot! Finn staggers, Rollins slips under, tag to Roman! Roman rallies on Finn, whip reversed but the jumping lariat knocks Finn down. The Big Dog gives the Extraordinary Man close-range clothesline in the corner then slings Finn out for a boot! Finn is down but Roman fires up. Roman locks and loads, but has to knock The Good Brothers away again, Slingblade from Finn! Finn tags Anderson, he rains rights down on Roman. Cover, TWO, but Anderson keeps on Roman. Anderson throws hands in the Balor Club cover and tags Gallows. Gallows rocks Roman with right hands, then brings Roman up for a big roundhouse. Cover, TWO, but a close one. Gallows grinds Roman with a chinlock, fans duel “Let’s go, Roman!” “Roman Sucks!” Roman gets to his feet and fights out with body shots, but Gallows yanks him down by his hair. Tag to Anderson, he stomps on Roman. Anderson forces Roman to lie down, big knee drop, cover, TWO. Anderson keeps Roman down with the chinlock. Roman gasps for air as fans continue to duel and make noise. Roman reaches for his corner, but Anderson wrenches him away. The fans keep making noise as Roman powers out, but Anderson gives him a right hand to slow him down. Anderson runs, into a tilt-o-whirl sideslam!

Both men are down, their teams are rabid for tags. Anderson and Rmoan crawl, tag to Gallows who stomps on Roman. Gallows brings Roman up, for a snap suplex! Cover, TWO, so Gallows drives elbows into Roman’s shoulder. Back to the chinlock, fans keep dueling. Roman stands up again and fights out with heavy right hands. He runs, but into the boot for Gallows, to SUPERMAN PUNCH outta nowhere! The fans and the teams are both fired up again, hot tags to Anderson and Rollins! Rollins rallies on The Balor Club, Blockbuster to Anderson before giving Gallows & Finn a DIVE! The Kingslayer keeps moving, Slingblade to Anderson! He goes corner to corner for the forearm smash, suplex and roll-through to Falcon Arrow! TWO, to Rollins’ surprise. Rollins keeps focus on Anderson, calling for the knee. Anderson gets a ropebreak, Gallows pries Rollins off. Rollins fights back, Jordan takes Gallows out with a clothesline. SPINEBUSTER from Anderson to Rollins, TWO! Anderson and Rollins are down from exhaustion, Jordan is the only man on the “Champion’s Club” corner. Rollins can’t escape Anderson, tag to Gallows. Gallows takes out Jordan but Rollins hits the PELE! Rollins and Gallows are down again, but Roman is back. Finn tags in, but Rollins counters his Slingblade with a back suplex! Roman wants in so bad, and Rollins crawls over, but Jordan comes in and distracts! The tag is made but doesn’t count! Rollins takes MAGIC KILLER! Roman still fights The Good Brothers off, then asks Jordan what he was thinking.

Jordan doesn’t think he did a thing, and doesn’t help Roman when he’s against the Good Brothers. Roman gives Anderson a SUPERMAN PUNCH and Gallows a SPEAR! Jordan stands Rollins up, only for Rollins to take Finn’s blasting dropkick! Finn then takes Jordan out with a forearm, and climbs up top! Coup De Grace!! The Balor Club wins! Their friendship and unity is just Too Sweet, but what will the fallout be within the Raw Tag Team Champions?

No time to worry about that, The Miztourage attacks! Miz takes Jordan out whiel Bo and Axel go after Roman! Miz also takes Rollins out and joins his henchmen in the ring to make it 3v1 on Roman. They haul Roman up, Miz gives him the Skull Crushing Finale!

That’s just the beginning, as The Miztourage wants to give us a sequel to their parody Shield Triple Powerbomb!! The former Intercontinental Champion makes a major statement and sends a message to the current Intercontinental Champion. Will The Hollywood A-Lister restart his historic IC Championship legacy with the Raw 25th Anniversary show?

 

My Thoughts:

This was a great episode of Raw, very strong from start to finish. Paige acting as manager for Absolution while she recovers makes perfect sense, she should’ve done more of that so the in-ring focus would be on the newer superstars. It even works that they lose tonight, to keep Bayley & Sasha strong before the Rumble, as well as frame it as the Rose & Sonya still needing Paige to be strong. WOKEN Hardy wins his debut because he should, and it helps Hawkins grow his historic losing streak. The laughing stare-down between Hardy and Wyatt was also great. These two don’t need to be physical until the Rumble, and then whatever over-the-top off-site match they end up having. I didn’t expect Enzo to retain his title the way he did, but it all still works in favor of his Heel character. It also helps his story with Nia, and Nia’s own story in the Women’s Division, which was great tonight. Nia going after Asuka is great because now it gives us two front-runners for Women’s Rumble winners. I love that The Bar got upset by Titus Worldwide, Titus & Apollo have been waiting a long time to do much of anything, so perhaps they can find a way into the tag team title scene in 2018.

I hope Rhyno & Slater failing to “toughen up” won’t lead them to breaking up. We lost Raw tag teams in 2018 that we shouldn’t have, so maybe Rhyno & Slater are instead building to that moment when they finally get a “tough win” and we can all celebrate with them like when they won the SmackDown Tag Team Championships. Meanwhile, Joe calling his shot while also calling out John Cena, that is setting up a top tier feud for 2018. The interactions of Roman, Rollins & Jordan were spot on for how they should be, and I actually liked Jordan giving off this vibe that he wanted to be New Dean Ambrose with how he paraphrased Ambrose’s dialogue from when the Shield reunited. The Balor Club take a Tweener role right now, as they should. There were also great references from commentary about the Bullet Club, and I am glad to see The Balor Club gets a win off of the story building between Jordan and Rollins. The Miz also continues where he left off, in a good way, and his rematch with Roman could go either way. Lastly, holy crap Braun Strowman continues to be the best thing in wrestling with yet another uncanny feat of strength. His not being champion yet is a shame but he still has all of 2018 to get there, and I have no doubt he will.

My Score: 8.5/10


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 4.18.2024

Motor City Machine Guns either go out on their backs, or head to Rebellion as champs! Lets see how they finish their current run in TNA!

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No burying the lead here! The Main Event is The System versus Motor City Machine Guns, and it’s the Go Home episode before Rebellion! So we’re guaranteed a damn good tag match, and we should get either new wrinkles, or ways to keep the storylines cooking going into the Pay-per-View.

With all the rumors and innuendo about the Guns being on their way out, I think we all assume that MCMG is losing, but my inner fanboy is still excited.

Ratings:

  • Little Guido w/New FBI vs Hammerstone: Hammerstone wins via Torture Rack – SQUASH
  • LSG vs Joe Hendry: Hendry wins via Standing Ovation – SQUASH
  • Mustafa Ali & GYV vs Cody Deaner, Jake Something & Rhyno: Ali wins via 450 Splash – ** 3/4
  • Rosemary w/Havok vs Jody Threat w/Dani Luna: Rosemary wins via Spear – ***
  • Motor City Machine Guns (Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley) vs The System (Eddie Edwards & Brian Myers) w/Alisha Edwards: System wins via Roster Cut + Knee Party – *** 1/4

 

Results:

So we kick off the match with Josh coming out to commentary again to watch Hammerstone’s match. They really need a new way to try and keep heat without reusing the same tired gimmick of “ring side seat” to a Squash match.

Little Guido w/New FBI vs Hammerstone

Guido tries to shoot the half, but Hammerstone shrugs him off, lifts him like a child and runs him into a corner, few short shots and then just tosses him across the ring. Hammer gets a little distracted talking smack to Josh and eats a foot, but then tosses Guido with the ole Sack of Shit move and keeps working over Guido.

Hammer shoves Clayton, and provokes him to push him back right in front of the referee. She ejects them, Guido tries to take advantage but when he goes for the pinfall Hammer kicks out immediately and presses Guido out of thing through the ropes. Continues to dog walk Guido, puts the head gear on the ECW Original and then Torture Racks him while staring directly at Josh, and of course picks up the submission victory.

LSG vs Joe Hendry

Hendry cuts a little promo, mentioning the Fat Uncle Phil joke…something about shopping at the TOP Dollar Store. Solid mic work.

LSG is a damn good local talent, he’s been seen in ROH and AEW in the past (perhaps others, but that’s what comes to mind immediately for me), but we all know this is an enhancement match. A few nice chain wrestling spots early, but Hendry uses his power to stop the smaller wrestler, Sack of Shit into Standing Ovation and the match is over quickly.

Mustafa Ali & GYV vs Cody Deaner, Jake Something & Rhyno

Well okay, having Deaner ask the crowd if they wanted a 3v2 or their third member…RHYNO…is pretty much a no brainer in Philly. But at least the gimmick isn’t quite as cringe as I expected.

Jake starts with Zack Gibson and throws him around. Jake goes for the tag and Deaner asks the crowd who Jake should tag, and the crowd picks Rhyno. Rhyno Whips Gibson into a corner, Drake actually softens the impact, allowing Gibson to fire back, tag out, but Rhyno levels both GYV members and then even knocks Ali off the apron. Rhyno tries to call to the crowd to tag in Deaner and that goes over like a fart in church. He tags him in anyway, and the crowd is kinda dead and doing whatever it wants after the obvious ECW chants when Rhyno tagged in.

GYV take a couple lumps but they of course start to work over Deaner and capture some momentum. Solid tandem work from GYV, they cut off Deaner from making a tag and goad Jake a little to cause the ref to block off the babyfaces so the heels can take a few shortcuts. Cody eventually makes the tag to Rhyno, hot tag, he tries to set up the Gore but the GYV manage to stop him in his tracks and hit an Enzuigiri to daze the Man Beast, he falls to his corner and Jake tags himself in. Jake literally runs them all over, tags in Cody and Launches him from the Top Rope into Zack Gibson. Ali makes the save and Jake tries to get his hands on Ali, but the GYV keep throwing themselves at him, literally. The triple team finally gets the best of Jake, they hit 3 Dives and then post Jake, so they gather around Cody like hyenas.

They forgot about Rhyno, he’s set up for a Gore, he Gores Drake, Gibson and Ali take out Rhyno, but then Cody starts to fight back. Ali stops Deaner’s offense with an Avalanche Sunset Bomb, then hits his 450 Splash. Jake barely misses being able to break up the pin.

Rosemary w/Havok vs Jody Threat w/Dani Luna

Jody tries to start quickly with Shoulder Tackles, Lariats and Scoop Slams, and it does seem somewhat effective. Rosemary is having trouble finding offense against the intensity, but she keeps kicking out. Shotgun Dropkick finally gives Rosemary an opening, she goes into full mount and rains down strikes. Rosemary shoves Jody into a corner and Bites her in the corner. Jody tries to fight out, they go across and Rosemary catches her with the legs and puts her in the Upside Down. Splash in the corner from Rosemary, Exploder Suplex and Jody is eating a lot of offense.

Rosemary looks like she’s caught after she gets tripped up into the ropes and Jody goes for her Rope Knee into the German, but Rosemary dodges. Rosemary hits her own suplex and pulls out a beautiful Last Chancery! I haven’t seen her do that in a long time. Jody manages to fight to the ropes, Rosemary is a little slow to capitalize and eats a Pump Kick. Rosemary goes flying into the ropes, Jody hits the Double Knees into the German this time for 2, and they trade a few haymakers after that. Jody folds Rosemary with a low Lariat, Zombie rise spot a few times, Jody goes for a pinfall and Rosemary kicks out.

Havok jumps up on the apron, Dani meets her and they decide to step down, but the distraction was enough. Jody turns around and eats a Spear. Rosemary wins!

Motor City Machine Guns (Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley) vs The System (Eddie Edwards & Brian Myers) w/Alisha Edwards

Eddie and Shelley start off, and its a very simple slow start. Mostly an early stalemate, the typical Japanese style the TNA seem to love to employ. Starters tag out, but then Shelley with the blind tag, Sabin Baseball Slides out, picks Eddie’s ankle and sends his face bouncing off the apron, while Shelley sneaks up being Myers and they hit a tandem move before we cut to commercial. Off of the commercial it looks like Eddie and Myers regained control. But a nice Jawbreaker from Shelley sends Eddie falling back into the MCMG corner. Dragon Screws to both legs from Sabin and Shelley, and we get the Dragon Screw dissection spot for the Guns.

Myers gets sick of things, tries to get involved, but Simultaneous Figure Fours from the MCMG makes The System look silly. Alisha does the classic “push the rope forward” gimmick to assist Eddie in breaking the hold. She keeps chirping at Shelley until she finally grabs his foot. Shelley doesn’t take kindly, tries to grab her by the hair but she gets away, Shelley eats a strike and falls back to the ropes so Lish can just throttle him with the rope, Sabin walks over and acts like he’s going to PK her and the look of disgust on her face is hilarious, like “how dare he threaten to kick her”. Would I be mad is Masha decides to team with Lish and they win the Knockouts Tag titles? No, because the Knockouts Tags are trash. But I still prefer Lish as valet/manager.

Shelley starts fighting back after another commercial break, Eddie tries to cut him off, but Sabin clocks Eddie and Shelley manages to make the tag and Sabin comes in. Lights up both System members, Kick off Tornado DDT, into a Running Gamengiri. Eddie tries to counter but Shelley assists, tandem strikes, Double Baseball Slide into the classic MCMG spot 5 Hole Dive! Keeping up with the classics Shelley stacks the System members on each other and hit the Missile Dropkick/Flatliner spot. As the Guns are rolling, Sabin accidentally catches Sabin with his foot and The System take control! They hit their pieces of the System Overload spot, but Sabin kicks out. Roster Cut attempt from Myers, but Shelley is back. High Speed Dirt, Machine Gun Sandwich, but Lish grabs Shelley’s foot when they’re setting up Skull and Bones. Shelley gets dropped on the turnbuckle and thrown out, Sabin eats the Roster Cut followed up with Boston Knee Party and System retains!

Its a little weird to have had the two commercial cuts and the fact there’s still Nic Nemeth to follow. So it feels a little flat, I hope this wasn’t their swan song match, because it was nice to see some classic spots, but it was entirely too abbreviated. 

Nemeth comes out, goes into the crowd and finds a kid with a kendo stick and borrows a beer from someone, so he does a bit of a Sandman tribute. Moose cuts off his promo basically immediately. He throws out the “can’t beat the system” line again, and Nic rolls with the punches well. Moose uses a few cute analogies about Nic having a failure laden past, but Nemeth bites back and its really damn good. He says he can see it in Moose’s eyes that he thinks he’s getting in the ring with Dolph Ziggler, but no, there is no more old Dolph Ziggler, just the new Nic Nemeth. And Moose’s cool seems to be slightly shaken after those words. Good promo.

Overall Score: 6.5/10

So this was okay, if it didn’t end as strongly as it did, I would’ve rated this much lower. Two squash matches in the beginning, reusing the Josh comes out to the announce table to watch trope is boring, hell even Clayton’s shove to Hammerstone was super lame looking. The Deaner match was luke warm at best, but things picked up around the Rosemary match.

Lets also not overlook the segments with ASH & Xia, Jonathan Gresham’s whole deal and EY having to return to the violence/sickness/world class maniac, whatever you want to call it, were all great building blocks. This definitely wasn’t what I would call a strong Go Home, but it didn’t hurt things for Rebellion. The whole injury of Cardona was addressed, which honestly sounded weird since Jordynne basically said she was expecting them to have a backup plan so she has a backup plan. I don’t really like how that video package came across.

But who knows, all I know is, this wasn’t an awful episode, it just wasn’t really strong either.  Here’s to hoping Rebellion Saturday is still strong.


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Mitchell’s ROH Results & Report! (4/18/24)

Time to Man Up!

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Will the Ivy League MVP earn a title shot?

The NEW ROH World Champion, Mark Briscoe, is here to step onto the Proving Ground with one of Maria Kanellis’ baby boys, Griff Garrison! Will Griff make Maria proud? Or will he reach for the sky?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bryan Keith VS Aaron Solo; Keith wins.
  • Six Man Tag: Lance Archer & The Righteous VS Jon Cruz, Savion Truitt & Damian Chambers; Archer & The Righteous win.
  • Lee Johnson VS JD Drake; Lee wins.
  • Abadon VS Allysin Kay; Abadon wins.
  • The Infantry VS The Iron Savages w/Jacked Jameson; The Infantry wins.
  • Six Woman Tag: Diamante, Leila Grey & Taya Valkyrie VS Kiera Hogan, Leyla Hirsch & Trish Adora; Kiera, Leyla & Adora win.
  • The Beast Mortos VS Nick Comoroto; Mortos wins.
  • Lady Frost VS Marti Belle; Frost wins.
  • The Dark Order VS Zak Patterson & Frank Milano; The Dark Order wins.
  • ROH World Championship Proving Ground Match: Mark Briscoe VS Griff Garrison w/ Cole Karter & Maria Kanellis; Mark wins and denies Griff a title match.

PLAY BY PLAY

Mark Briscoe speaks.

“Now House of Black, I’ve been doing this dance with y’all a little while now, and I’m starting to understand how y’all operate. Starting to understand y’all’s M-O. You try to intimidate me. You try to strike fear into the hearts of men. Well I done told you, I fear no man, I fear no evil. And ancient wisdom says the violent take it by force. Now lemme tell you, Eddie Kingston, Adam Copeland, and Mark Briscoe, we some violent men! And at Dynasty, we bringing the violence, babeh! So heed my advice, House of Black! Be afraid, be very afraid!” The Sussex County Chicken is ready for a fight, will he, the Rated R Superstar and Mad King tear down The House of Black once and for all?

 

Bryan Keith VS Aaron Solo!

The Bounty Hunter is still looking for a prize, but he’ll gladly fight to earn his shot. Will Keith be heading for a golden opportunity on the other side of Dynasty? Or will Solo shoot first?

The Code of Honor is upheld with sarcastic enthusiasm by Solo, and Keith shoves him away. The bell rings and Solo SLAPS Keith! Keith TACKLES Solo and rains down fists! The fans  fire up, Solo gets away then knees Keith low. Solo ROCKS Keith, whips him to a corner, but Keith comes back to run Solo over! Keith scoops to SLAM Solo, then stands on Solo’s face! The fans fire up for the KNEE DROP! Keith then SLAPS Solo! The fans rally for “BK! BK!” Solo storms up but Keith kicks low. Keith reels Solo in, suplexes, and he holds Solo up! Keith marches around, then SLAMS Solo down! Solo bails out and the fans fire up as Keith aims.

Keith builds speed, slides, but Solo ducks! Solo sends Keith into steel steps! The fans boo as Solo leaves Keith behind. The ring count starts, fans chant “SOLO SUCKS! SOLO SUCKS!” Solo counts along but wants it to go faster. Keith stands at 8 of 20, slides in, but Solo stomps and HAMMERS away! The fans boo more, but Solo stands Keith up to bump him off buckles. Keith CHOPS in return! Then CHOPS again! The fans “WOO~,” then Keith ROCKS Solo with a forearm. Keith CHOPS in the corner, but then Solo dodges. Solo tries but Keith dodges the chop to CHOP Solo down! The fans fire up while Solo is stinging.

Keith whips Solo, Solo reverses and CLOBBERS Keith! Cover, TWO! Keith grits his teeth but Solo knees him in the back! And again! The fans rally, Solo taunts them, and then ELBOWS Keith in the head. Solo stalks Keith to a corner, digs his boots in, but again the fans chant “SOLO SUCKS!” Solo stomps away on Keith, digs his boots in again, but Keith fights up! The fans fire up as Keith fires forearms! Keith fires forearms again and again and again, winds up, but Solo dodges! Solo comes back, but Keith ROCKS him after all! The fans fire up as Keith runs in to BOOT! Solo sputters, Keith runs, but then Solo SUPERKICKS! Keith just roars!

Solo swings, but into a T-BONE SUPLEX! Cover, TWO! The fans rally as Keith keeps calm. Keith waits on Solo as fans rally behind him. Solo staggers into a fireman’s carry, but he fights free! Solo shoves, goes to a corner, but then Keith comes back. Solo ELBOWS Keith, whips, but Keith reverses! Solo goes up but gets caught, for an USHIGOROSHI! Cover, TWO! The fans rally up again as Keith slashes his throat and aims his finger gun! Keith underhooks, but Solo fights the lift! Solo back drops, Keith sunset flips but Solo stays up to DOUBLE STOMP! Solo then runs up, catches Keith and hits a T-BONE! Cover, TWO!

The fans fire up but Solo hurries to a corner. Solo climbs fast, and DIVING DOUBLE STOMPS! Cover, TWO!! Keith survives that coup de grace and Solo isn’t sure what to do. Solo kicks Keith around, drags him up and reels him in to underhook. Keith fight that lift, Solo CLUBS away on him, but Keith Alabama Lifts! Solo grabs ropes so Keith lets him down, and ENZIGIRIS! But Solo SCREW HIGH KICKS! Solo goes up top, but Keith RISING HEADBUTTS! The fans fire up with Keith and he climbs! Keith reels Solo in, for DIAMOND DUST!! Cover, Keith wins!

Winner: Bryan Keith, by pinfall

A big win for BK! And he gives back that sarcastic handshake. Will the Bounty Hunter be hot on the trail of a championship after AEW & ROH pass through the Gateway City?

 

Mark Sterling speaks.

“If you ask AI to create the perfect professional wrestler, it wouldn’t even come close to you. If wrestling is a body business, then you’re a multinational corporation. Biology defying symmetry, no fat, all muscle, no waste. As functional as you are aesthetic. High-flying? You got it. Ground ‘n’ pound? You got that, too. Striking, brawling, submission, technical, there is not a single style you have not perfected. For the last 20 years, you’ve been one of the most consistent and proficient wrestling specimens for any company that’s been willing to throw money at you and begged you to stay. And now, it’s time for them to beg for mercy.

“You are Tony Nese, and you are a Premier Athlete.”

Now Mark Sterling & The Premier Athletes are here in person.

They stand backstage, Sterling’s guys in matching tracksuits, and he says the last time he looked into the camera, he told everyone he had a plan. The very next day, they enacted that plan. Sterling took them off the road, they entered a professional fight camp. They got the best coaches, best trainers, best doctors, and these three started to do what they do best: go to work. Supercard of Honor, against two former ROH TV Champions, PA got an impressive victory. Fruits of their labor. Ariya Daivari is back better than ever. Josh Woods is bigger and better than he was when he won the National Championship. And Tony Nese is in the best shape of his life, which is saying something.

In fact, what’re we even talking about? These three are the most underappreciated athletes in the company. They walk like stars, they move like stars, they present themselves like stars, and by the end of this year, they will be champions. Supercard was just phase one of this plan. Phase two… starts tonight. Then just what happens when the Premier Athletes start making moves?

 

Lee Johnson VS JD Drake!

Even though he lost at Supercard, Big Shotty stays positive! He got close to the ROH World Television Championship, will he get back there for another shot? Or will Scrap Metal be another speedbump in Lee’s momentum?

The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings, and the fans rally as the two circle. They tie up, JD HIP TOSSES, and Lee scrambles to ropes. JD flexes and fans cheer, which surprises JD. Lee gets up, he and JD reset. They tie up, JD arm-drags, but Lee gets up. Lee keeps calm while JD talks some smack. They circle, tie up again, and JD scoops! JD carries Lee around, with one arm! Then SLAM! JD dusts off his hands and the fans fire up more. Lee is a bit frustrated, but he fires himself up. The fans rally with him, he and JD circle to tie up. Lee goes to hip toss, but JD blocks! JD tells Lee he knows that’s not gonna work!

JD goes to hip toss but now Lee blocks! Lee arm-drags, then he goes to feint, but JD blocks with a headlock. Lee shoves JD, tries another arm-drag, but JD blocks that. JD whips Lee, Lee ducks ‘n’ dodges and arm-drags again! The fans fire up as Lee tries to scoop, but JD’s too hefty! JD SLAPS Lee, ROCKS him, then whips him to ropes. Lee ducks ‘n’ dodges again, shoves JD and hurdles! Lee drops, then DROPKICKS! JD staggers to a corner, Lee fires up, and the fans fire up with him! Lee runs up on JD in a corner to CHOP! JD barely flinches! JD puts his arms back and dares Lee to try again. Lee CHOPS, but JD puts Lee in the corner!

JD swings, Lee dodges and CHOPS! And CHOPS! And CHOPS! Lee whips, JD reverses but Lee ELBOWS back! Lee runs up but into a lift, and FLAPJACK off buckles! Lee falls, the fans rally up, and JD dusts himself off. JD storms back up on Lee, brings him up, and the fans rally. JD ROCKS Lee, stands him up in the corner, and CHOPS! The fans “WOO~!” while Lee sputters. The fans want that “One More Time!” so JD stands Lee up. JD winds up, to JAB! The fans boo JD trolling them, but JD stands Lee up to CHOP him after all! Lee is stinging, but JD brings him up. Lee throws body shots but JD ROCKS Lee!

JD whips, Lee sunset flips! JD stays up, but Lee avoids the hip drop! Ghost pin, TWO! JD gets up, kicks low and whips, to SPINEBUSTER! Cover, TWO! Lee stays in this and the fans rally up. JD sits Lee up, KICKS him in the back, then paces around. The fans rally for Lee but JD pie faces him around. Lee rises, JD brings him up and Lee CHOPS! And CHOPS! And CHOPS again! JD throat chops! The ref reprimands, JD claims he jabbed to the chest. JD then scoops and SLAMS Lee, to then FALLING HEADBUTT! Cover, TWO! Lee is still in this but JD CHOKES him! The ref counts, JD lets off, claiming he was just checking the pulse.

JD clamps on a chinlock, digging his knee into Lee’s back. Lee endures, the fans rally up, and Lee fights to his feet. Lee throws body shots, but JD knees low! JD suplexes but Lee slips free! Lee ROCKS JD, ROCKS him again, but JD CHOPS! JD runs, but Lee SUPERKICKS! JD flops out of the ring and the fans fire up! The fans rally as Lee builds speed, to FLY! Direct hit at the ramp and the fans fire up even more! Lee puts JD in, climbs a corner, and JD stands. JD staggers around, into the CROSSBODY! Cover, TWO! JD stays in this but then bails back out. Lee thinks on what he has to do and the fans rally up.

Lee runs, to slide, but JD gets under! JD pops Lee up to CLOBBER him! JD puts Lee in, aims from a corner, and Lee goes to the opposite end. JD runs up, but Lee moves, CANNONBALL hits buckles! Lee hurries up while JD is down! The fans cheer as Lee aims, FROG SPLASH, but JD moves! Lee rolls through, runs back at JD but JD puts him on the apron. JD ROCKS Lee, goes up, and he brings Lee around. The fans fire up as JD brings Lee up, but Lee fires body shots! Lee GAMANGIRIS, then climbs! Lee sunset flips for the POWERBOMB! The fans fire up and Lee climbs back up, FROG SPLASH!! Cover, Lee wins!

Winner: Lee Johnson, by pinfall

Big Shotty’s got range, and he hit the mark! Will Lee take this momentum and turn it into another chance at a championship?

 

Abadon VS Allysin Kay!

Speaking of second chances, The Living Dead Girl got screwed out of the ROH Women’s World Television Championship when Mercedes Martinez & Diamante conspired against her. And while AK Don’t Play, she knows the OG Badass well. Can Abadon prepare for revenge by taking down Martinez’s greatest rival?

The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings, but Abadon holds on, to BITE Allysin’s arm! Abadon then laughs, dodges Allysin to HEADBUTT low, HELL STAB, then mule kick! Abadon runs to SHOTGUN BOOT! Allysin goes to a corner while the fans rally up and Abadon shrieks! But Allysin BOOTS Abadon down! Allysin rains down fists, covers, ONE!! Abadon sits up but Allysin brings her around to fireman’s carry. SAMOAN DROP! Cover, TWO! The fans rally up, Allysin drags Abadon up to TOSS her to a corner! Allysin fires body shots, then she CHOPS! Allysin whips corner to corner hard and Abadon bounces off buckles!

Allysin takes a bow, puts pinkies up, and SPLASHES in the corner! Allysin CHOPS, whips, and runs up again, but Abadon BOOTS her! Abadon runs to BULLDOG! The fans rally as Abadon slithers out to the apron then climbs up the corner. Allysin crawls, Abadon aims, CROSSBODY! Abadon runs to KNEE Allysin back down! Abadon storms up on Allysin, reels her in, BLACK DAHLIA! Cover, Abadon wins!

Winner: Abadon, by pinfall

Abadon smiles, then shrieks into the night! Will Mercedes Martinez make sure to stay far, far away from the frightening Living Dead Girl?

 

Backstage interview with Taya Valkyrie.

Lexi Nair is with La Wera Loca and brings up her trios match alongside Diamante and Leila Grey. But this is also the first time we’ve seen her since Supercard, where Johnny TV lost to Dalton Castle. The question is: where is Johnny? Uh, recovering from that vicious attack by Dalton Castle and his “special boy,” Paul Walter-Whatever! Taya is gonna call up Fran Dreischer to file a complaint! For someone so TV Ready, Castle and Paul sure don’t look it. So yes, Johnny is rehabbing. Wait he’s in rehab? Ew, no, who do you think they are? Johnny is rehabbing the abs! This is an aesthetics business so he has to look amazing!

So tonight, Taya will carry the weight of the TV Family in trios action. So run along, Lexi, Taya has things to do. Uh, this is Lexi’s interview space. Oh, well, her apologies. Taya bumps Lexi on the way out, but will Taya’s team win some major points in the title chase tonight?

 

The Infantry VS The Iron Savages w/Jacked Jameson!

Captain Shawn Dean & Carlie Bravo may not be the ROH World Tag Team Championships, but they are not deterred. Will they get through the jacked ‘n’ juicy juggernauts to go after The Undisputed Kingdom once again?

The teams sort out, #BadNewsAndTattoos starts against Beefcake Boulder, and they keep the Code of Honor. They tie up, Bravo tries but can’t push Boulder back, but Boulder pushes Bravo back! Bravo resets with Boulder, beefs up, and they tie up. Bravo wrenches to wristlock, but Boulder WRINGS Bravo out! Boulder talks smack on Dean and Bravo, but Bravo pie faces. Boulder scoops Bravo, but Bravo slips free to DROPKICK! Boulder stays up, runs up, but Dean is there to GAMANGIRI! Bravo tags Dean while Boulder throws a fit, but DOUBLE DROPKICKS send him reeling! Bulk Bronson tags but runs into a DOUBLE HIP TOSS!

The fans fire up as the Infantry crisscross and SPLIT the wishbone! Bravo gets fans going with “OORAH!” Dean runs to JUMP ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Bronson bails out, Boulder is there to help him, and Dean builds speed, only for Jacked Jameson to stand in the way! He wants Dean to sip the Savage Sauce! Dean says no thanks, but in comes Bronson! EXPLODER! Bravo protests but Bronson drags Dean to a cover. The ref is busy arguing, he finally sees the pin, TWO! Bronson is annoyed, but he mocks Bravo’s air machine gun. Bravo then tags Boulder before he brings Dean up. The fans rally but the Savages still hit a SHOULDER TACKLE SUPLEX COMBO!

Bronson flexes, Boulder taunts Bravo, and then Boulder whips Dean to the corner. Boulder wraps Dean’s arms around ropes to HEADBUTT again and again and again! Tag to Bronson, he brings Dean around, and they visit #TIDDYCITY! But Dean reverses, it’s Bronson who dives in! Boulder panics, runs up, but Dean DUMPS him! Bronson swings, misses, hot tag to Bravo! Bravo rallies on Bronson with big forearms! Bravo whips, Bronson reverses, but the CARLIE CROSSOVER takes Bronson down! Boulder gets up, Bravo fakes him out to SCISSOR KICK! Bravo then kicks Bronson, and manages a FALCON ARROW! Cover, TWO!

The fans rally, Bravo pounds the mat, but now Jameson wants Bravo to sip! Bravo says no, get outta here! Bronson runs up again, Bravo dodges, and Bronson barely avoids hitting Jameson! Bravo aims, Bronson dodges, the SUPERKICK hits Jameson! Jameson spews sauce! Boulder catches Jameson, Dean goes up, and Dean CROSSBODIES to wipe them both out! But Bronson rolls Bravo up! TWO, and Bronson grabs Bravo, only for Bravo to kick low! Bravo reels Bronson in, tags Dean, and TORNADO- NO, Bronson stops the DDT! Dean gets in, Bronson scoops, but Dean slips free! Feed to a SUPERKICK!

The Infantry coordinate, for BOOT CAMP! Cover, Infantry wins!

Winners: The Infantry, by pinfall

Dean & Bravo redeem themselves from Supercard and are ready to get back on track! But wait, The Premier Athletes make their way out here! Is this what Smart Mark was talking about for phase two? Daivari & Nese rush the ring and start throwing hands with The Infantry! Woods tips the scales as he DECKS Dean, then DECKS Bravo! But wait! Here comes Dalton Castle! The Peacock won’t stand for there to be bullies, and he takes off his sandals to weaponize them! The Premier Athletes dare him to, but wait! Here comes Mark Briscoe, Bryan Keith and Lee Johnson! They run The Premier Athletes off!

Sterling shouts, “Who do you think you are?!” but he’s shouting at THE ROH World Champion and many other big names around here! Will The Peacock, the Chicken and the rest of ROH humble Sterling’s stable once and for all?

 

Six Woman Tag: Diamante, Leila Grey & Taya Valkyrie VS Kiera Hogan, Leyla Hirsch & Trish Adora!

The Cuban Diamond has staked her claim at challenging for the ROH Women’s World Television Championship, but so has The Hottest Flame. But let’s not forget The Last Baddie Standing, La Wera Loca, the LEGIT One and The AfroPunk! Billie Starkz still sees herself above all six of these women, but which trio takes the lead in the title chase with a win tonight?

The teams sort out, Taya starts against Kiera and the Code of Honor is upheld. The bell rings, the two tie up, and Kiera gets around to waistlock. Taya pries the hold, backs Kiera into a corner and throws elbows! Taya stomps away on Kiera, then says who’s the hottest now? Taya snapmares, covers, ONE!! Taya drags Kiera up, whips her to ropes, but Kiera holds ropes to BOOT back! Taya runs up again but Kiera drop toeholds her onto ropes! HIP ATTACK! Taya flounders, Kiera runs to step-up and LEG DROP! Cover, TWO! Kiera keeps cool as she brings Taya up, but Taya ROCKS Kiera then throws her by her hair!

Taya tags Diamante, they stomp Kiera, then Diamante sucker punches Leyla! Diamante runs in to DROPKICK Kiera, then drags her to a high stack cover, ONE!! Kiera is tougher than that but Diamante says it’s just a matter of time. Diamante runs, PLANKING SPLASH flops as Kiera moves! Hot tag to Leyla! Leyla gut wrenches Diamante to GUT WRENCH SUPLEX! Tag to Adora, then Leyla wrenches so she can hand it off to Adora. Adora WRINGS Diamante’s arm, drags her up and wrenches again, but Diamante ROCKS her! Adora swings, Diamante dodges to tilt-o-whirl and RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Diamante snarls and pushes Adora down to rain down fists!

Diamante storms around, brings Adora up and CHOPS her on the back! Tag to Grey and she NECK SNAPPERS Adora! Cover, TWO! Adora is tougher than that but Grey rains down fists! Grey drags Adora up, bumps her off buckles, then tags Taya. Taya and Grey dig their boots in, then Taya stomps a mudhole. Taya sits Adora down to METEORA! Tag to Diamante and she stomps a mudhole! The ref reprimands but Diamante tags Taya back in. Taya steps over Adora and mockingly has Adora reach out to her corner. The ref has to keep Hirsch back so Grey gets shots in, then Taya drags Adora up.

Taya again mockingly holds out Adora’s hand but the fans rally up. Adora fights up, but Taya pulls her into the motorcycle stretch! Adora endures the knee in her back, fights up to her feet, and then arm-drags Taya away! Taya gets up, ducks ‘n’ dodges and mule kicks! But Adora ducks the buzzsaw to BASEMENT GERMAN! The fans fire up while both women are down! Adora and Taya crawl, hot tags to Kiera and Diamante! Kiera rallies on Diamante with big forearms, then a SUPERKICK! Turn and NECKBREAKER! Kiera goes up a corner while Diamante flounders around. Diamante stands, into a MISSILE DROPKICK!

Diamante flounders, Grey tags in but Kiera dodges to fire off forearms! Grey shoves back, but Kiera returns to SHOTGUN! Grey flounders, Kiera fires up, and says kiss this! HIP ATTACK in the corner! She sits Grey back down to run and BOOT WASH! Kiera drags Grey to a cover, Diamante breaks it! Diamante gets Grey outta there, and Taya tags in. Taya runs up to mule kick, KNEE LIFT and wrench Kiera, into a BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Cover, TWO! Leyla also gets in, she pushes Taya around. Leyla drags Taya up but Diamante runs in. Leyla gets around to SAIDO! Taya gets Kiera up but Kiera SUPERKICKS!

Kiera brings Taya over, tags Adora, and they feed Taya to the BUBBA BOMB! Body scissor and GEDO CLUTCH! TWO!! Hot tag to Grey, she runs up, ducks ‘n’ dodges, then SLINGBLADES! Cover, TWO! Grey is frustrated but she gets Adora up. Underhooks, but Adora breaks that to fireman’s carry! Adora storms over, tags Hirsch, but Grey slips free! Leyla dodges Leila and feeds her to Adora’s BOOT! Then GERMAN SUPLEX! Cover, TWO!! Grey survives but Hirsch tags Kiera. Kiera runs, but Taya trips her up! Diamante distracts so the ref misses that! But then Leyla DIVES onto Taya! Diamante CANNONBALLS Leyla!

LARIAT TUBMAN from Adora to Diamante! Kiera dodges Grey to ROUNDHOUSE! And then “That’s all, PERIODT!” FACE THE MUSIC!! Bridging cover, Team Kiera wins!

Winners: Kiera Hogan, Leyla Hirsch & Trish Adora, by pinfall

It was fast ‘n’ furious in the end there, but the Hottest Flame burns it down! Will she be first up to strike a match with Billie Starkz?

 

Backstage interview with Maria Kanellis, Griff Garrison & Cole Karter.

Lexi is with the First Lady of Wrestling and her baby boys, the Diamond in the Rough wearing the stolen mask from Serpentico. Lexi congratulates them on their win over Spanish Announce Project at Supercard, but it seems there might be some unfinished business. Are they ever going to give Seprentico his masks back? Karter takes the mask off to say hell no! Griff says Serpentico’s masks mean a lot to him and his lucha libre culture. But uh, they don’t care! It got them the attention that they deserve, and those wins have been a stepping stone in this company.

If Serpentico wants his masks back, he doesn’t need to trick them into a match. They’re happy to beat the crap outta him anytime, anywhere! Maria loves the confidence, and says Griff will need it in his Proving Grounds match against THE ROH World Champion, Mark Briscoe. Griff is all fired up, will the Ivy League MVP pass the test with flying colors? Or will he fail to #ManUp?

 

The Beast Mortos VS Nick Comoroto!

Black Taurus has evolved into something even more menacing than before, and he is looking to stampede all the way to the top of ROH! But Mr. Freak Beast has changed a lot about himself, too, in hopes of finding success. Whose transformation will prove to be for the better as these behemoths collide?

The Code of Honor is upheld reluctantly, the bell rings, and the fans rally up. The two tie up, go around, and Comoroto shoves Mortos down! Mortos gets up in a huff, gets in Comoroto’s face, but Comoroto pie faces him. So Mortos SLAPS Comoroto! Comoroto runs up, Mortos dodges, and they RAM shoulders! Mortos ducks ‘n’ dodges and jumps to RANA! Comoroto goes to a corner but Mortos runs in to UPPERCUT, CLOTHESLINE, and GAMANGIRI! Mortos wrenches and hits an ARMBAR CODE BREAKER! Comoroto staggers, but he blocks the whip! Comoroto shoves Mortos, runs up, but Mortos dodges to then roll off Comoroto’s back!

Mortos tries to hip toss but Comoroto blocks! Comoroto LARIATS Mortos down then rains down fists! Fans are torn as Comoroto huffs ‘n’ puffs and stomps Mortos around. Comoroto digs his boot into Mortos’ face, lets off to soak up heat, then he drags Mortos up. Comoroto scoops to SLAM, then he runs to JUMP ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! The fans rally as Mortos pounds the mat in frustration. Comoroto slashes his throat, but Mortos throws body shots. Comoroto CLUBS Mortos, Alabama Lifts, but Mortos sunset flips! Comoroto stays up, hauls Mortos up, but Mortos JAWBREKAERS, KNEES and ROCKS Comoroto!

Mortos goes to suplex but Comoroto’s a big guy, too! Comoroto suplexes Mortos, but Mortos knees free! Mortos goes to a corner, Comoroto runs in but Mortos dropkicks the legs out! Comoroto hits buckles, then Mortos runs in, CORNER 619! Comoroto staggers away and Mortos climbs, to MISSILE DROPKICK! Cover, TWO! Comoroto still has power to spare and he storms up on Mortos. Mortos UPPERCUTS first! Mortos goes to whip but Comoroto blocks again! Comoroto whips Mortos to a corner, runs up, but Mortos slips out to the apron! Comoroto hits buckles, Mortos goes up, and the fans rally! MORTOS TWISTER! Cover, Mortos wins!

Winner: The Beast Mortos, by pinfall

Comoroto is big and bad but this is a beast of a different breed! Will nothing stop the modern day minotaur from making ROH his domain? Will Jacoby Watts’ teachings ever pay off for Comoroto?

 

Backstage interview with Nick Comoroto.

Lexi is with Mr. Freakbeast as he returns backstage, and she asks him what his strategy will be moving forward after this tough loss. Jacoby Watts walks in to say, “Turn the page. Start a new chapter. Nothing changes if nothing changes, Nick. It’s a harsh reality. But I am your answer. Your beacon of hope in the darkness. Follow me and I will lead you into the light! For I am Jacoby Watts, the one and only, praise be to he, and he is me.” Watts waxes poetic while making himself the focus, but will Comoroto accept his guidance?

 

ROH World Championship Proving Ground Match: Mark Briscoe VS Griff Garrison w/ Cole Karter & Maria Kanellis!

The Sussex County Chicken won this title after a war with Eddie Kingston at Supercard, and those two are still going to be friends taking on The House of Black this Sunday! But will Mark be able to focus on tonight with Dynasty on the horizon? Or is this where Maria’s baby boys start building their kingdom?

Mark shows off the belt and its new camouflage patterned leather! The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings and we’re on the clock. The fans cheer on Mark as he circles with Griff. They tie up, Griff headlocks, but Mark powers up and out. Griff sunset flips, but Mark rolls through to drop on the headlock! Griff moves around, fights up, and powers up, but Mark holds tight! Mark hits the takeover, Griff headscissors, but Mark kips free. Roles reverse as Griff headlocks for the takeover, and Mark headscissors. Griff kips free, but Mark shows Redneck Kung-Fu stance and Griff scrambles away! The fans cheer but Maria coaches Griff back up.

Griff cools off, he and Mark reset, and the two circle again. They knuckle lock but Griff kicks low. Griff UPPERCUTS, UPPERCUTS again, then whips corner to corner. Mark goes up and out, SWATS the haymaker to REDNECK KUNG-FU UPPERCUT! Then Mark gets in to BOOT Griff down! Griff is on ropes, Mark runs in to BOOT WASH him right outta the ring! The fans fire up as Mark builds speed, and he DIVES onto Griff! Not the cleanest landing but Mark borrows a hat to put it on! The fans fire up with Mark, he gives the hat back, then drags Griff up to DECK him! Mark drags Griff up again, to scoop and SLAM!

Griff sputters, Mark goes to the apron, and the fans fire up as Mark takes aim. But then Karter and Maria stand in the way! The fans boo, Mark sighs and steps inside, and Maria coaches Griff up. Griff flounders up, the fans rally behind Mark but then Karter and Maria each get on the apron! The ref is busy arguing with Maria but Karter distracts Mark. Griff sneaks in to CLOBBER Mark! Griff fires forearms while the fans boo, but then Griff stomps a mudhole into Mark. The ref counts as Griff digs his boots in, but Griff lets off at 4. But then that lets Karter CHOKE Mark behind the ref’s back!

The fans boo as Karter gets away with one, and Griff drags Mark up. Griff UPPERCUTS, but Mark CHOPS! Griff sputters, Mark CHOPS again! Griff knees low, whips Mark to a corner, but runs into an ELBOW! Mark runs up, into a BOOT! Cover, TWO! Griff clamps onto Mark with a chinlock and he grinds Mark down. The fans rally as Mark endures and fights up. Mark throws body shots, then fires up to CHOP! CHOP! And CHOP! Mark runs, but into the ROLLING ELBOW! Griff then torture racks for the TOWER HACKER BOMB! High stack, TWO! Mark survives and Griff is frustrated but Maria coaches him up.

The fans continue to rally behind Mark as Griff aims again. Griff goes up but Mark REDNECK UPPERCUTS! Griff gets caught up in ropes, Mark lets him loose so he can fall to the floor. Karter hurries over, but Mark goes up to PLANCHA both baby boys! The fans are thunderous, and Mark cracks open a can of WOOOOO Energy! Mark chugs it, bangs the can against his head, then gets Griff in the ring. The fans fire up as Mark runs corner to corner, but Griff BOOTS him! Mark comes back to LARIAT! The fans fire up, Mark reels Griff in, but Griff wrenches out, only for Mark to LARIAT! Mark hauls Griff up again for underhooks!

Mark lifts, for the JAY DRILLER!! Cover, Mark wins!

Winner: Mark Briscoe, by pinfall (denies Griff Garrison a title opportunity)

Maria is upset but there’s nothing she can do, her baby boy wasn’t man enough to stop the NEW ROH World Champion! Will Mark continue to carry on his brother’s legacy and become one of the best champions in ROH history?


My Thoughts:

A very good episode of ROH for being 92 minutes. I still skipped some very clear filler, but Marti Belle got a good showing in her loss to Frost and The Dark Order got a good match out of Zak & Frank. Cruz, Damian & Savion got an okay showing but c’mon, they were against Archer & The Righteous, those guys have been running through everyone. It hasn’t really led them to anything yet, but maybe after we get undisputed AEW & ROH World Trios Champions after Dynasty, Archer & Righteous challenge the winners. And real good wins for Bryan Keith and Lee Johnson, each guy looking good towards midcard titles at some point.

Really good match from Infantry VS Savages, with the Savages being a bit more Heelish this time. Good win for Infantry, but I didn’t think The Premier Athletes would be going after them first. And I didn’t expect Faces like Keith, Lee and Briscoe to run out to get at them. Maybe the Premier Athletes can also position themselves to go after the trios titles after Dynasty. If The Acclaimed win, they’ll need Heel opponents. Archer & Righteous can play either side, but fans really like Archer so I kinda want him and Righteous to be Faces when facing Bang Bang Gang.

Good match and good win for Abadon over Allysin. Good win for Kiera, Leyla & Adora, though things got a little sloppy in the middle, Leyla’s timing wasn’t quite there. Athena & Billie are both Heels, so while Queen Aminata is in the mix, the champion she doesn’t choose still needs a good Face challenger so you can take your pick of the winners from tonight. Really good match from Mortos and Comoroto, and Mortos winning also helped serve Comoroto’s story with Watts. Watts keeps insisting he’s the answer, but this has to lead to Comoroto breaking free and beating Watts up for his arrogance.

Good promo from Maria, Griff & Karter, and they just kinda copy-pasted Mark Briscoe’s promo from Collision that same Saturday. Really good match for Griff against Mark but of course Mark wins. Mark getting involved with Premier Athletes, maybe Woods or Nese get a shot at Mark only to lose and be Mark’s solid first defense. Not sure who could be a more prolonged feud with Mark, but there are plenty of possibilities, and I’m just happy to see him showing up on ROH TV as the ROH World Champion should.

My Score: 8.5/10


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