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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Live Report! (3/13/18)

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All images courtesy of the WWE’s official Twitter

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Rusev w/ Aiden English VS AJ Styles; Styles wins, by disqualification.
  • Big E & Jimmy Usos VS The Bludgeon Brothers; The Bludgeon Brothers win.
  • Bobby Roode VS Jinder Mahal w/ Sunil Singh; Mahal wins.
  • Naomi VS Carmella; Carmella wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

AJ Styles heads to the ring!

The Phenomenal One is still the WWE Champion after Fastlane’s fast and furious Six Pack Challenge, and Indianapolis is happy to see him! He welcomes them to “The House that AJ Styles Built!” The odds were against him, and he admits getting put through the commentary table by John Cena was bad. Styles started doubting himself, but he knew it wasn’t impossible. Everyone knows “when you fall down, suck it up!” If you want it bad enough, you’ll find a way. And clearly, Styles found his way! But better than that, Styles knows he’s headed to Wrestlemania. He remembers where he came from, and remembers most thought it was “unbelievable” Styles would even be in the WWE. The fact that he’d become WWE Champion was unbelievable. Him going to Wrestlemania as WWE Champion was unbelievable, but not impossible.

Styles’ Road to Wrestlemania has been a tough one, but fans tell him, “You Deserve It!” No, he earned it. The man standing across from him is the biggest Japanese superstar in WWE history, Shinsuke Nakamura! The Dream (Re)Match is coming, and Styles respects Nakamura because they have similar paths. But when it comes to the title, there’s no comparison. Styles knows he’s no different from anyone else, he’s WWE’s Every Man. At least, until he’s in the ring. When Styles is in the ring, “I am Phenomenal.” But speaking of his opponent, Shinsuke Nakamura appears!

The King of Strong Style won against The Bulgarian Lion at Fastlane to keep himself running at top speed towards this match with Styles. He steps into the ring with his future opponent, hears the dueling chants of “AJ Styles!” “Nakamura”, then says, “AJ, you’re a champion. Everyone likes you. Everyone likes me, too. I respect you. At Wrestlemania, dreams come true. My dream: knee to face. And I become champion!” Fans have mixed reactions to his claim, but then Rusev appears! He’s here for a match with the champ!

Rusev w/ Aiden English VS AJ Styles!

Rusev Day may have been rained on by the King of Strong Style, but there’s always today! Can Rusev ruin Styles’ run this close to Wrestlemania?

The bell rings and the two stare down while fans chant “Rusev Day!” Styles and Rusev circle then tie up, Rusev powering Styles back into a corner. Rusev lets Styles come back out and they circle again. Styles gets a waistlock while Shinsuke watches from ringside, but Rusev throws Styles off. Rusev wags his finger “No, no, no,” then circles with Styles again. Styles kicks Rusev’s leg, but Rusev walks it off. He backs Styles up but Styles kicks back again to get a headlock. Rusev powers out and runs Styles over! Styles gets to a corner while fans duel, “AJ Styles!” “Rusev Day!” Styles and Rusev circle and tie up but Rusev kicks low. Rusev rocks Stylse with a haymaker, then another. Rusev keeps on Styles in a corner with a knee, then runs in but hits buckles.

Styles rocks Rusev back with haymakers and then chops. Styles whips but Rusev holds ropes to kick back. Rusev reels Styles in for a lariat, then drags Styles up to run. Styles ducks under then jumps over to drop Rusev with a dropkick. Rusev springs up but Styles clotheslines him out of the ring! The fans fire up, and Styles takes aim. Slingshot forearm takes Rusev down again!

Styles drags Rusev up and into the ring, fans keep dueling, Styles kicks Rusev. Rusev stands up, blocks the suplex, then suplexes Styles back. Styles escapes and throws chops and haymakers. Rusev blocks another whip, then throat chops! Spinebuster from Rusev, cover, TWO. The champion is in trouble while we go picture in picture.

Rusev stalks Styles to a corner, then rams shoulders in. He backs off at the ref’s count and Styles slumps to the mat. Rusev drags him out onto the apron to then ram an elbow right into Styles’ head. Rusev drags Styles over to a corner, and throws the arm against the post! Styles writhes out to the floor, but Rusev stands over him. Rusev brings Styles up and into the ring, then covers, ONE. Rusev keeps going, targeting the arm with a keylock. He wrenches Styles’ arm, but Styles stands up to fight back with right hands. Styles breaks free, runs but is thrown with a body drop! Rusev roars as he looms over Styles menacingly. Rusev brings Styles up and hatch suplexes him over, then stalks him to the ropes. The Bulgarian Brute sits Styles up to kick him in the back, then covers, TWO.

Rusev grows annoyed, but he toys with Styles while he’s down. He smacks Styles until he falls to the floor, but Styels springs up to rush back in and attack! Styles unleashes right hands, then whips. Rusev reverses, and dropkicks Styles! Rusev celebrates his feat of agility and we go to single picture. The fans duel with chants, but Rusev keeps on Styles by lifting him to the top rope. Rusev smacks Styles and Styles almost falls all the way off! Another right hand and Styles still has to cling to the top rope. Rusev climbs up, prepares a superplex, but Styles slips under to trip Rusev up! Fans fire up while Styles recovers. English grows worried for Rusev while Styles unleashes the Phenomenal Blitz! Sliding forearm, and Styles fires up.

Styles runs corner to corner, big clotheslines! Then the fireman’s carry lift but Rusev slips out. Rusev shoves Styles, styles ducks the kick, another try at the fireman’s but still not enough. Rusev shoves Styles again, and hits a pop-up knee to the stomach, followed by a roundhouse!

Styles goes down, Rusev covers, TWO! Rusev stands up and stomps the mat, preparing for his kick, but misses and gets Styles PELE! Styles lifts in the fireman’s, USHIGOROSHI! Styles’ own knee bothers him, but he keeps moving. He brings Rusev up and around for Clash position, somehow lifts Rusev, but Rusev gets the lag to drag Styles for the Accolade, only for Styles to go for his Calf Crusher! Rusev grabs the ropes, Styles keeps trying, and gets teh roll! Englihsh comes in, attacks Styles, the match is thrown out! English stomps and stomps, then throws hands, but Nakamura slowly rises.

The King of Strong Style sees Engilsh bring Rusev up for another roundhouse, then he comes in to strike! He takes out English with the roundhouse, then a KINSHASA for Rusev!

Nakamura nods to Styles as he stands tall. He leavees without needing thanks, this was all to keep the dream match alive. Will Styles be able to keep himself in good shape to pay Nakamura back?

 

Backstage interview with Big E.

After the carnage wrought by the Bludgeon Brothers, Harper & Rowan expect the survivors to answer an open challenge. Big E says that he wishes the New Day were 5-time champions, or conspiring to fill Corey Graves’ car with pancake batter, but he isn’t. Harper & Rowan didn’t just take away the New Day’s chance at another title reign, they tried ending careers. Kofi & Woods will be back, but Big E will hold down the fort for his team. Jimmy Usos shows up and says he won’t be alone. Jey got taken out, too, and Jimmy has beef with The Bludgeon Brothers, too. The Usos and New Day can settle their differences later, now is about Harper & Rowan. Can Jimmy & Big E get even with the most destructive duo in recent history?

 

AJ Styles finds Nakamura backstage.

He lets the Rockstar know that he didn’t need his help at Fastlane, and he didn’t need his help out there. Nakamura says that it looked like he did. “But don’t worry, I’ll help every time until Wrestlemania. So then I’ll beat you with a knee to face.”

 

Big E & Jimmy Usos VS The Bludgeon Brothers!

Things did not go the way anyone expected at Fastlane for the SmackDown Tag Team Championship match. Harper & Rowan wreaked havoc on both champion and challenger teams, sidelining three of the five men in one fell swoop. Now rivals must team together to remove the upstart behemoths from the equation.

And to start, they bring the fight to Harper & Rowan during their entrances! Rowan goes down, then Harper is put into the LED! Jimmy & E then grab steel chairs to equalize things with Harper’s & Rowan’s hammers! Things are tense as the four men stare down, and the referee just gets out of the way.

Harper & Rowan stand in the ring with Jimmy & Big E, and the tension mounts, and the fans are fired up! The fight breaks out, but the chairs are swatted away. Jimmy & Big E get clear before taking hammers to heads, we go to break while things cool off.

SmackDown returns and the match is actually a match now as Big E starts with Harper. The bell rings and they both go at each other! Big E rams Harper in a corner, then stomps away on him. He runs but into the Scrapbuster! Harper tags Rowan, and Big Red splashes Big E! Rowan taunts Jimmy, then turns to Big E to stomp a mudhole into him. He drags Big E up for a big scoop slam, then steps on him before tagging in Harper. Harper mule kicks Big E, then uppercuts him into a corner. The fans chant for Uso & E, but Harper whips Big E corner to corner. Big E elbows back, hot tag to Jimmy!

Jimmy hits back, jumps over then hits again. Jimmy speeds things up to forearm then mule kick and uppercut to another mule kick. Harper blocks teh third, but Jimmy elbows him away. Jimmy goes up, Whisper in the Wind! SUPERKICK for Rowan, then Jimmy runs, but into Harper’s boot! Harper throws Big E out then Rowan throws Big E into steel steps! Tag to Rowan, then the slap to fire him up for the corner to corner splash! Full-nelson lift, Killer Bomb!! The Bludgeon Brothers win!

The Tag Apocalypse of SmackDown isn’t over, Harper rams Big E in the barriers, then feeds him to Rowan’s body check! They leave Jimmy for dead, is there any hope of survival in the Division after this?

 

Backstage interview with Sami Zayn.

Who does Sami blame for not becoming WWE Champion? Well that’s a load question. The obvious answer is Shane McMahon. Sami was pinning Kevin Owens but Shane pulled him off before three. Yet, Sami can’t completely blame Shane, he also blames Kevin. Kevin is the target of Shane’s obsession, and it made Sami “guilty by association.” Sami admits that Kevin is talented, funny and has always been by his side, but he’s also “a self-absorbed, egomaniac.” Sami played his game perfectly, yet because of Kevin and Shane, he paid the price. That is a price Sami will never, ever pay again, not for anyone. Can the Underdog from the Underground turn it around on the home stretch of the Road to Wrestlemania?

 

Charlotte Flair heads to the ring!

The Queen of Flair held onto her SmackDown Women’s Championship against the Squad Leader, Ruby Riott, but then she-like the rest of the WWE Universe-got a great surprise. The Empress of Tomorrow won the inaugural Women’s Royal Rumble and therefore had her choice of Women’s Champions in the WWE. Yet she had gone for quite some time without naming who she wanted. That is, until she appeared at Fastlane to be face to face with her choice and issue the challenge in person! Charlotte says she’s honored to be the one chosen, so she wants to be here to meet her “woman to woman.” With that, Asuka makes her way out to the ring.

The Queen welcomes the Empress, and says “be careful what you wish for.” Asuka thanks Charlotte, and Charlotte says that everyoen else always tells her two things: Congratulations; and what would happen if you faced Asuka? The undefeated Empress is almost untouchable, but what would happen to her if she went 1v1 with The Queen? Who bows down? We’ll see at Wrestlemania. “Iron sharpens iron”, and Charlotte saw Asuka win. Charlotte hoped Asuka would choose her, to bring this challenge. When Asuka’s music hit, Charlotte got goosebumps over this “once in a lifetime opportunity”. Charlotte admits she’s never faced anyone like Asuka, but says Asuka’s never faced anyone like Charlotte. Charlotte vows to end the Streak and cement her Legacy. “WOO~!”

Asuka responds with, “I chose you because I like a challenge!” Charlotte is the Queen, but she’s the Empress. “And Asuka bows to no one.” That’s because “no one is ready for Asuka!” The two stare down and even grin, but who will be the one smiling after a SmackDown Women’s Championship dream match!?

 

Randy Orton appears!

The Viper is now the United States and Grand Slam Champion after hitting an RKO #outtanowhere on the GLORIOUS Bobby Roode. He also wants to keep an eye on Roode and the Modern Day Maharaja in their match up next. But before that, Orton says that “I’ve been called many different things throughout the course of my career. Some good, some not so good, but the one thing that I have never been called until now, is United States Champion.” Winning the title puts Orton on a short list of elite superstars, and that’s a list he cares about. Roode proved himself a tough competitor and has Orton’s respect. But, the title is Orton’s now, and he’s taking it to Wrestlemania, and no one will stop him. That’s when Bobby Roode makes his entrance!

Roode congratulates Orton, but counters with talks of a rematch. That rematch is going to happen on the Grandest Stage of Them All, Wrestlemania! And when Roode regains his United States Championship, it will be “Absolutely GLORIOUS!” That’s when Jinder Mahal appears to say, “I would like to also congratulate Randy Orton.” The fans cheer but Mahal continues to say that Orton has been here for an eternity, yet finally did it. But Roode has been here for less than a cup of coffee, yet got it before him. That’s the truth. Forget Wrestlemania and rematches, Mahal vows to beat Roode just like he did Orton. Orton, please sit and watch as Mahal “inflicts carnage” on Roode.

Bobby Roode VS Jinder Mahal w/ Sunil Singh!

Roode’s goal of becoming the greatest United States Champion in WWE History may be delayed, but he won’t let Mahal interfere in his mission to get the title back. Can Roode once again be GLORIOUS and roll on towards a championship rematch?

The bell rings, Orton takes a seat and Roode circles with Mahal. Mahal kicks and punches Roode to a corner then whips corner to corner. Roode goes up and ever, goes for the DDT but Mahal narrowly escapes. Orton smirks at Mahal while we go picture in picture. Mahal takes his time returning into the ring, but then drags Roode out. Roode punches back then bounces Mahal off the apron before putting him back in the ring. Roode keeps on Mahal with punches and kicks, then a chop. He chops Mahal more, then whips, but Mahla reverses. Roode kicks Mahal away, but Mahal responds with the kitchen sink knee and a dropkick to the back. Mahal covers, TWO, and Roode gets to a corner.

Mahal stomps a mudhole into Roode, then grinds in his knee. He backs off at the ref’s count, but then drags Roode up to choke him on the ropes. He backs off again to stomp and give springboard knee drops over and over. The referee reprimands Mahal, but Mahal sits Roode up to drive in a knee to the back. Mahal puts on a half-nelson chinbar while we go back to single picture. He wrenches and twists Roode, but fans rally and Roode stands up. Roode fights out of the hold, then throws haymakers. Mahal puts the headlock on, Roode powers out and things speed up, but Mahal runs into Roode and their heads collide! Both men go down, dazed from the impact.

The fans rally for Roode while he and Mahal stand up, and Roode blocks to counter with punches and chops. Roode whips Mahal, Mahal reverses, but Roode still rallies with forearms and lariats. He runs and clotheslines Mahal in a corner, then hits the neckbreaker. Roode climbs up to the top rope, takes aim, and flies for the clothesline! Then he fires up and winds it up, GLORIOUS Pose, to GLORIOUS– No, Mahal powers him back. Roode boots him away, then hits the GLORIOUS Blockbuster!

TWO! Mahal gets to ropes, Roode walks over, and Mahal sends Roode to the outside. Roode comes back, but Mahal boots him right down! Cover, TWO, and Mahal can’t believe it.

Even so, he grins as he stalks Roode, preparing for his finish. He drags Roode up, but Roode slips out to try his DDT. Mahal body drops Roode but Roode sunset flips and high stacks, TWO! Roode runs but into a back elbow, to then SPINEBUSTER Mahal! Cover, TWO, and even Orton is a bit surprised by that. Roode gets up to climb up but Sunil Singh distracts. Roode shoves Singh into a post, then climbs over him. Mahal hits the ropes to trip Roode up! KHALLAS! Mahal wins, just as he said!

But then Orton slides in, to RKO Mahal!

The Viper stands tall with his championship, will he keep his word to keep that title?

 

Backstage interview with Kevin Owens.

What is his response to Sami Zayn saying Kevin is to blame for why Sami isn’t champion? Kevin’s to blame?! Why can’t Sami see this is is all Shane’s fault. Sami is being selfish, because Kevin got screwed over, too, and first! Kevin would be WWE Champion right now, and Sami wouldn’t have been screwed at all. And what about his stunt, pretending to let Kevin win to then get a cheap victory? Kevin is sick of it all. Sami is a liar, manipulator and passing blame.

Kevin is the rightful champion, but he’s not because of Shane! Like all McMahons, Shane insists on having the spotlight! Why did we need Shane at ringside? If Sami can’t see Shane for who he really is, then Kevin will “open his eyes up to the truth.” What will happen when/if Kevin and Sami meet in person?

 

Naomi VS Carmella!

Ms. Money in the Bank got the pin on Lady Glow in a tag match she and the Queen of Harts won over Naomi and Becky Lynch. Can Naomi even things up with only weeks left before Wrestlemania and the inaugural Fabulous Moolah Memorial Battle Royal?

The bell rings and they tie up, Naomi puts Carmella in a corner. They pull hair then break, but Carmella kicks low. She throws Naomi into the corner, then out of the corner, all via the hair. Carmella grinds Naomi’s face into the mat, and calls her “a nobody!” She bounces Naomi off the mat, then covers, TWO, so she stands on Naomi’s hair and pulls! Carmella toys with Naomi as she brags about being Ms. MITB. She puts Naomi in a corner to bump her off her boot then stretches Naomi back before shoving her into a buckle. Carmella even wraps Naomi’s hair around the rope to pull on it! Naomi protests but Carmella keeps going until the count of 4.

Carmella embraces the heat then moonwalks, but Naomi runs out for a Thesz Press and fast hands! Naomi gets her back for all the hair pulling and face smearing, but then Carmella slaps her! Naomi slaps back, and again and again and again! Carmella screams, Naomi backs off, to then run Carmella over with clotheslines. Naomi blocks a kick, Carmella ducks kicks, but not that knee! The fans fire up with Naomi, and Naomi springboards, but Carmella trips her up to then hit a draping neckbreaker! High stack cover, Carmella wins! The #ModernDayMoolah rolls on towards the battle royal, can she cash in big with two history making moments at Wrestlemania?

 

Shane McMahon heads to the ring!

The SmackDown Commissioner promised a major announcement for Wrestlemania, and speculation has been running wild. Shane O’Mac says hey to Indianapolis before saying “it’s no secret that over the last several months”, he’s had trouble with both Kevin Owens & Sami Zayn. He isn’t apologizing, because Kevin started this when he attacked Shane’s father, Vince McMahon. Vince may not be the nicest guy, but imagine if it was your father. What would anyone else do? That’s what led to Shane VS Kevin at Hell in a Cell, but then Sami Zayn got involved. That led to more trouble with him going after Sami & Kevin with “conduct unbecoming of SmackDown’s Commissioner.” Shane has talked things over, such as with Daniel Bryan-who will return next week, not tonight-because after tonight, Shane is taking an indefinite leave of absence.

But before that, Shane has one more announcement. Leading up to Fastlane and from events tonight, it will be Kevin Owens VS Sami Zayn at Wrestlemania! Simple as that, Shane washes his hands of this mess. However, Kevin Owens appears to respond! Finally something Kevin agrees with. He wishes Shane the best of luck. And as for that ‘Mania match, he can just beat up Sami whenever he wants. Speaking of, Sami comes out to respond, as well!

Sami gets in Kevin’s face, then turns to Shane and says, “You are just doing this because it made you so happy to hear fans” cheering for two friends beating each other up. If he’s basing things off what the fans think, then thank GOD Shane is leaving.

This is baffling. Shane gave them the chance to face each other, on the Grandest Stage of Them All, but they’re upset. Oh they appreciate it, but they know he’ll also appreciate this beat down! They go after him 2v1, but Shane fights them off! Only for a moment, though, as Kevin drags Shane off Sami for Sami to mug Shane. The Best Frenemies put Shane in a corner, and Sami hits the HELLUVA KICK! But that’s not all, Sami feeds Shane to the Pop-Up Powerbomb!

Kevin & Sami see the referees coming in and they go after them now! #Kami are reunited as they rip into officials and the Commissioner, and Sami gets a chair! They set it up and put Shane through it, to then ram his throat into the post!!

Shane’s eyes are glazed over and he wheezes for air, but #Kami drags him up the ramp and to the stage, then to the back. They drag him all around, to give him a send-off. Sami drags Shane up for Kevin, and together they powerbomb Shane on spare frames!!

Shane crumples and groans in pain and #Kami leave him to the medics. Forget the match for ‘Mania, will Kevin & Sami even be employed after this!?

 

My Thoughts:

This was not the episode of SmackDown to follow a great Fastlane with. Styles’ interaction with Nakamura was good, and Styles’ match with Rusev was also pretty good, as was Nakamura bailing Styles out to emphasize their friendly rivalry. I wonder if Nakamura’s promise to keep Styles safe until Wrestlemania will result in one or two tag team matches of Styles & Nakamura VS Rusev Day or some other team. And I liked that Big E and Jimmy Uso teamed up in an attempt to get back at Harper & Rowan, but it was more or less obvious that it wasn’t going to work in their favor. If kayfabe says Big E is too hurt for ‘Mania and Jey is still sidelined, I wonder if the titles would be vacated and then The Bludgeon Brothers could just demolish all the other SmackDown teams to win hands down.

Charlotte and Asuka had a good promo showdown, and Asuka was smoother tonight than she’s been on Raw. Rumor has it they hold her English vocabulary back, but whether that’s true or not, maybe being on SmackDown where there isn’t a Mean Girl style Heel will benefit Asuka’s promos. Orton had a decent promo in his own right, as did Roode and Mahal when they came out to stake their claims to the US Title. The Mahal-Roode match was alright, but once again, a Singh is the key to Mahal winning. Orton gets payback, though, and stands tall. I would’ve instead hoped someone in management just skipped ahead and announced a triple threat, to give us a US Championship round robin to fill out the last few weeks.

No offense to Carmella and Naomi, but how were they the last match of the night? I would’ve put this as the opener and made either the tag team or Styles segment in its place. Good for Carmella to be on a roll like this, but I wonder if it’s just setting her up to fail. Then closing with Shane, hooray~ (sarcasm). He said he’s stepping down, but now he might be hospitalized given that semi-surprising beat down. I’d think instead of Kevin VS Sami, this will now shift into Kevin & Sami VS Shane & ???. Shane might choose someone rumored for a return, and that could be anyone from Lashley to Jericho. Given everyone’s history, Jericho seems like a great choice to take on Kevin & Sami in a grudge match.

My Score: 7.5/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s Ring of Honor Report! (7/7/18)

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ROH WRESTLING TELEVISION, Episode 355

ROH goes to the extreme as Cheeseburger and Bully Ray battle in a No Holds Barred Match! With no rules but to win, can Burger survive the hardcore legend?!

 

All images courtesy of the Fite.TV app and streaming service

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Riley Shepard & Gabby Ortiz VS Sumie Sakai & Stella Grey; Sumie & Stella win.
  • No Holds Barred: Bully Ray Dudley VS Cheeseburger; Bully Ray wins.
  • Titan VS Cody w/ Brandi Rhodes & Bernard the Business Bear; Cody wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Cody & Brandi Rhodes speak.

“You know those stories about pirates that plundered a ship and leave a man behind, marauders that raid a village and leave one behind?” Both fiction and reality, one person was always left behind to tell the tale. Titan, you’re going to experience that as Cody leaves just enough gas left for you to crawl back to CMLL. That way, he can tell them that if they want to maintain a relationship with Cody’s ROH, they need to send someone bigger, better. No one’s bigger than Cody. Cody laughs and hugs his wife, but will he need to be consoled by her after tonight?

 

Riley Shepard & Gabby Ortiz VS Sumie Sakai & Stella Grey!

The Women of Honor return as the inaugural ROH WOH Champion teams with the ROH Dojo graduate to take on the debuting Geek Gladiator and returning Gift of Gab. Can the Ray of Sunshine continue on her roll since becoming champion, even in 2v2 competition? Or will there be a shocking non-title upset from the Monster Factory graduates?

The Code of Honor is upheld, and Stella starts with Riley. They circle with the bell and tie up. Riley gets a headlock then wrenches the arm. Stella rolls through to reverse the wrench, then brings Riley to the mat. Riley gets up and arm-drags but Stella holds on. Stella has Riley in the armlock, but Riley gets up and whips. Stella reverses the whip, then drop toeholds, and Sumie adds the dropkick before Stella hits the elbow drop. Sumie goes back to her corner while Stella covers, TWO.

Stella brings Riley up but Riley rolls Stella away from Sumie. Riley kicks Stella down, then tags to Gabby. Gabby neck snaps Stella then hits a basement dropkick. Cover, TWO, but Gabby keeps her cool. Fans rally up while Gabby tags Riley back. They double Russian leg sweep Stella, then Riley cartwheels to drop knees. Cover, TWO, but Gabby & the Geek keep control while we go to break.

ROH returns and Stella suplex fights with Gabby. They go for a suplex at the same time, but cancel out. Stella suddenly throws Gabby overhead! Stella crawls for Sumie while fans fire up. Gabby crawls for Riley, hot tags to her and Sumie! Sumie rallies on Riley with Mongolian chops! She’s all fired up as she whips but Riley reverses, only for Sumie to hammerlock and forearm Riley! Sumie runs, and bowls Riley over with a forearm smash! She hits the shining wizard, covers, but Gabby breaks it up quick. Gabby and Riley double whips Sumie, but Sumie breaks through to hit them with double clotheslines! Gabby and Riley end up in opposite corners, so Sumie forearms Riley before grinding a boot into Gabby.

Sumie hits Riley with another forearm, then the swinging knee! She goes after Gabby but Gabby puts her on the apron. Sumie knocks Gabby away, then climbs up top. Missile dropkick! Riley gets up to roll Sumie, TWO! Sumie gets back at her with the TJ Neckbreaker! TWO! Sumie’s surprised, but she’s not done yet. She brings Riley up but Riley jawbreakers. Gabby returns for a jumping DDT! Riley fireman’s carry but Sumie slips out. Riley kicks away and rock Sumie with a roundhouse. Cover, but Stella breaks it just in time. Gabby hits Stella, then whips Stella, only for Stella to SPEAR her down! Riley gets Stella with an Exploder! She swings on Sumie but Sumie counters with a back elbow. Sumie then gets Riley in the Smash Mouth!

Cover, Sumie & Stella win!

Winners: Sumie Sakai & Stella Grey, Sumie pinning

Gabby & Riley did the Monster Factory proud, but it wasn’t enough to stop this Ray of Sunshine. Will the star of Japan’s Jersey Shore make this inaugural reign an instant classic?

 

ROH looks at what led to tonight’s No Holds Barred match.

Cheeseburger requested such an intense match after everything Bully Ray has done to him. It was back at Supercard of Honor XII that The Dawgs challenged Burger to a match, but Burger needed a partner. So Burger turned to a man he thought would help him in the tag team hall of fame legend. Bully accepted, and the two rallied on Rhett & Ferrara, only for Bully to turn on Burger mid-match! Bully was disgusted by Burger putting him on the spot. To Bully, Burger and wrestlers like him are what’s wrong with wrestling today.

Then, as Burger looked for payback at War of the Worlds back in May, Bully robbed him of it with a low blow! Bully let himself be counted out as he glared at fans, then came back to hurt Burger more with a powerbomb. Burger got back at Bully a couple days later with a low blow, only to suffer a SUPER sit-out powerbomb! Bully added insult to injury as he used chains to whip and lash Burger. Burger wins on the record books, but he wants more. Now he will enter the hardcore legend’s territory in a match with No Disqualifications and No Count Outs! Will Burger truly win against his Bully? Or will he be lucky to survive?!

 

No Holds Barred: Bully Ray Dudley VS Cheeseburger!

ROH is about to go extreme!

It’s Burger Time, but this won’t be fun and games. Bully literally let Burger win their past two meetings, once by disqualification, then by count-out. Now there’s no way for Bully to keep himself protected from a loss to the underdog, will Bully be a man and finish this fight?

Bully sure seems to do something, as he rushes the ring, already armed with a kendo stick!

Though, he doesn’t use it yet, as he sneaks up behind the fired up Burger for a low blow! Burger tumbles down and fans rain down boos and jeers as the bell rings. Fans do cheer “E C Dub! E C Dub!” for the legend, too, as the Hammerstein Ballroom is old stomping grounds for one half of Team 3D. Bully also shows he has a cheese grater for the Cheeseburger. Burger is clutching his nuts but Bully won’t give him time to rest. He hammers Burger down then brings in a trash can to SMASH Burger with it! Bully grimaces down at Burger as he drags him over, to whip him into barriers! Bully trash talks Burger, egging him on as he hammers Burger again. He brings Burger up and around to bounce off the timekeeper’s table.

Cary Silkin gets up from his seat, not wanting to be this close to the action, and Bully gets in his face about it. The fans sense a table in their future, but Bully puts Burger into the ring instead. Bully talks trash to Cary again, then goes back to Burger. Fans let Bully know what they think of him as he brings Burger up. Bully sets Burger on the top rope, and into a Tree of Woe, to stand on the crotch! Bully tortures Burger’s nuggets, and reminds everyone, especially the referee, that there are no disqualifications. He starts intimidating the referee, and fans boo and jeer. Bully watches Burger on the mat, refusing to quit. Burger drags himself up but Bully is on him again with a trophy lift! And then throws him to the mat! Bully mocks the fans by lending an ear, brother.

Bully, still talking crap to Cary, then grabs that kendo stick and takes his time playing around. He dares the ref to do something, then he SMACKS Burger across the back. Burger writhes in pain but Bully won’t end it. Bully continues to, well, bully the referee, but we take a commercial break.

ROH returns but Bully still toys with Burger. He lifts Burger up with the kendo stick to jab it into Burger’s ribs. Bully says “This is what you wanted.” He puts up his hands to jab and jab away. Burger wobbles as Bully winds up the Bionic Elbow, but Bully takes too long and Burger picks up the kendo stick! Burger SMACKS Bully back! And his front! Fans are fired up with Burger as he just swings for the fences! Bully is writhing in pain now as fans chant for Burger. Burger keeps going, then chokes Bully with the stick! Bully snapmares Burger off, then kicks him before picking him up for a powerbomb TOSS!

Burger crash lands on the mat, but Bully isn’t done with him. Bully is stinging from the kendo stick strikes, but Hammerstein shouts “We Want Tables!” Bully rejects that idea to present a chain! He whips and slaps Burger over and over with the steel, daring Burger to get up. The referee won’t let Bully continue, “He’s had enough!” Bully says “He’s had enough when I say he’s had a enough.” The ref pleads with Bully but Bully whips HIM with the chain! That’s the last straw for Colt Cabana, he rushes the ring!

Cabana SPEARS Bully and throws furious right hands! Hammerstein is thunderous as Cabana grabs that chain, to clothesline Bully with it! Fans are chanting “Colt Cabana!” as the ROH veteran takes that cheese grater, and hands it to Burger! He brings Bully around to open the way, and Burger goes up to ask, WAZZUP!? The cheese grater to the nuts, that’s what! And Burger grinds it in deep! Fans are thunderous for Burger, as Cabana tells him, “Burger! Get the tables!” Fans like that!

Burger & Cabana grab a table, drag it into the ring, but Bully revives and grabs Burger, to back suplex him down. Cabana is beside himself as Bully brings the table out for his own uses. Cabana tries to coach Burger up but Bully is on him again. Bully brings Burger over, sets him on the table, then hammers away to keep him there. Bully climbs up, takes aim, and leaps, but Burger dodges! The splash belly-flops through the table!

Burger crawls over, makes the cover, but there’s no referee! Another one appears, counts, TWO!! If only there wasn’t the delay, Burger would’ve won by now. But Burger still has something left. He fires up, takes aim, but now BJ Whitmer brings Cabana away from ringside. Bully boots Burger down, covers, Bully wins!

Winner: Bully Ray Dudley, by pinfall

Just as Burger was closing in on true victory, Bully pulls a win out of nowhere. The referee helps him stand up, but Bully shoves him out of the ring! Bully celebrates for himself, and surprisingly doesn’t beat down Burger more. Will this bully ever get what he truly deserves?

 

It’s Coleman’s Pulpit!

The Most Versatile Man in Sports Today returns to bring us the truth, for the truth will help you see. Today’s guest, or rather guests, are the most requested guests and the ROH World Six Man Tag Team Champions, The Kingdom.

The Kingdom’s Matt Taven & TK O’Ryan are honored to be on the show, they’re big fans of Caprice Coleman. Huge fans even. They were raised right, because they never come to a party without bringing a gift. The Kingdom remembers Coleman’s days in the Rebellion, and that sweet beret. They have a nice little surprise: a brand new… Dunce cap! Or rather, “Melvin” cap. Oh, and balloons, courtesy of Vinnie Marseglia. Want some wine? No thanks. Well alright. Vinnie drinks his from a balloon…?

Moving on, the two-time Six Man champs are going to learn who their next contenders are after a five-team Gauntlet match! Isn’t that a little fishy? The Kingdom had to wait a whole year to get their rematch, but a “merry bunch of Melvins” get a shortcut to a title match? Caprice is a smart man, is that a conspiracy to him? Perhaps. Coleman remembers a story, there was a guy who got everything handed to him. His parents bought him a luxury sedan for his 16th birthday, but then he wrecked it! So what did he do then? He just asked for another, and his parents got him one. This time it was a mid-size, because now he’d have to drive his siblings around. This “adversity” made that young man spruce up that car into the best out of what they head. Like The Kingdom and the titles!

Hey, wait. Are they the sedan in this story?! Is Coleman claiming there’s no conspiracy?! Well he just thought they were passed that. There IS a conspiracy! Matt is #TwoBeltsOneTaven and he should have THREE belts! He’s the real ROH World Champion! And by the way, that hat was calling Coleman a Melvin the entire time. Coleman tells “Pauly Shore” here that he is no Melvin, and they are his guests, “you jive turkey!” Says you, you Melvin jive turkey SUCKA! Back at you, you jive TIVE turkey! That’s Dr. Jive Turkey to you, Melvin! Doctor? More like SUCKA Jive Tive- Balloon pop. Y’all’re crazy. And that’s coming from Vinnie. Taven isn’t crazy, he’s a champion. And Coleman’s pocket square isn’t even real. The Kingdom storm out, leaving Coleman to close his segment with a “See you later.”

 

SoCal Uncensored speaks.

“Matt Taven, the Kingdom, I have to applaud you.” First, they took advantage of Three-Team Six Man chaos to keep those titles in the UK. Second, there’s now a “wacky gauntlet” so that SCU has to battle everyone else for a rematch they should already have. That’s fine by Daniels, because the SCU is happy to beat up all the filler ROH creates for this gauntlet to happen. In New York, all the wannabe badass trios can bring it on, because the SCU will bring that #MandatoryViolence. Will Daniels, Kaz & Scorpio win against four other would-be contenders to get their rematch with The Kingdom?

 

The Dawgs are desperate.

They need a third man to even be part of the Six Man Tag Gauntlet, but if they want Shane Taylor to be that third man, they need lots and lots of cash! Maybe they can squeeze some of the other guys for money. Ryan Nova comes along but doesn’t want any trouble. Then give up some cash! He doesn’t have any on him, so Rhett shakes him down. Look, it’s his wallet! Wait, all he has is $6 and a bunch of receipts? Now what? Can they at least give Ryan his wallet back? Yes, and a swift jab, too! “Keep the change, you filthy animal.” The Dawgs laugh their way out, but with barely enough money for drinks, how are they gonna pay the Notorious Hitman?

 

Titan VS Cody w/ Brandi Rhodes & Bernard the Business Bear!

The crossover of ROH and CMLL continue, but the American Nightmare vows to make this an ultimatum. Will the former ROH World Champion prove the oldest promotion needs to step it up? Or will he find that he’s the one not on CMLL’s level?

Cody upholds the Code of Honor with Titan, but then wants Titan to kiss the ring. Titan declines, he just wants to wrestle. The bell rings and the two circle. Cody wants Titan to hold on a moment, as he gets some push-ups in. Cody gets his pump and flexes, so Titan shows off his flexibility with neck stretches. Fans like that, and even Cody applauds. Fans chant “Lucha! Lucha!” for CMLL as Cody and Titan circle again. They tie up, Cody gets a headlock and takeover, but Titan stands back up. Titan fights out then powers out, but Cody runs him over. Titan kips back up, and Cody admits that was good. But then Cody kicks low and drops for the uppercut.

Titan comes back with quick kicks, then whips. Cody reverses and things speed up, but Titan shows his balance with the handstand, only for Cody to kick him down. Cody flexes to embrace both cheers and jeers. He stalks Titan to a corner, then whips him corner to corner, but Titan reverses. Titan runs in but is put on the apron. Titan swing kicks Cody away, then springboards for a crossbody! Dropkick on top, and Titan dares Cody to come back. Titan runs, but Bernard swipes at him! Titan backs the bear down, but Cody comes back. Cody misses but then Brandi trips Titan up. Cody pounces on Titan, then covers. TWO, but the former champion is still in control while we go to one more break.

ROH returns once more, and Cody goes after Titan’s mask! The referee counts so Cody backs off to hear the fans boo and jeer, brother. Fans only boo and jeer more as Cody goes side to side. Cody goes back to Titan and whips him into a corner. Cody gives a corner clothesline, then another. He slaps Titan, then embraces the heat. Cody runs corner to corner, but Titan follows with a big corner clothesline! Titan kicks Cody between ropes over and over, then springboards for a missile dropkick! He keeps moving, giving another dropkick to send Cody out. Titan and the fans rally up, and Titan builds speed, but Bernard trips him! Titan goes after Bernard, but then Cody rushes in. Cody swings on Titan, but Titan dodges and Cody hits Bernard instead! Cody checks on Bernard, but then Titan mule kicks and SUPER Asai Moonsaults!

Titan wipes out both Cody and Bernard! Bernard’s head came off! Is he dead?! Brandi tries to help the mascot, but Titan grabs her by the sling. The referee warns Titan, and Titan thinks better of it, so he just hits Cody again. Titan puts Cody back in the ring, then climbs up top. Fans fire up, but Cody sees him and goes to the opposite side. Titan hops down, but Cody boots him down! Cody shouts for Brandi to give him something. She throws in her hairspray, but it ends up closer to Titan. Titan picks it up, but the referee takes it away. This leaves Titan open to Cody’s low blow kick! Then Beautiful Disaster Kick! TWO!? Titan survives somehow, but Cody grows frustrated.

Cody drags Titan up, and the two brawl with forearms. They go back and forth, then Cody jabs and throws haymakers. Cody runs, but Titan goes Matrix to then calf kick! Titan runs, but Cody uses the ref as a shield. Titan stops, and in the distraction, Cody snatches the mask off!! Small package, Cody wins!!

Winner: Cody, by pinfall

Such disrespect and dishonor, but for the American Nightmare, a win is a win. Cody and Brandi laugh at the embarrassed luchador, but will they get the last laugh in the hunt for the ROH World Championship?

 


 

My Thoughts:

This was a good episode of ROH. Not as good as other weeks, but still good. The WOH Division tag match was alright, but it could’ve been better. Perhaps while Gabby & Riley have worked together and they have chemistry, they just weren’t as familiar with Sumie and Stella. That and the fans didn’t really know whether to cheer or boo Sumie, they went back and forth at times. In the end, Sumie’s team wins because the inaugural WOH Champion should only lose in singles competition, and only to someone fitting. With Deonna Purrazzo headed back to the WWE, it seems like it’ll be between Kelly Klein or Tenille Dashwood to be the next #1 contender.

That No Holds Barred Match went as could be expected. I like this new element of Bully targeting Cary Silkin, former owner of ROH before the Sinclair purchase, and still an active producer of the show. I bet Bully will end up facing Colt Cabana at some point, with how Cabana did his best to even things out for Cheeseburger. That Coleman’s Pulpit segment to hype up the Six Man Gauntlet was so goofy, I couldn’t help but like it. There was a lot of great detail in facial expressions and close-up camera cuts, like Vinnie preparing a balloon string garrote for Coleman. SCU stake their claim, but I wonder if one of these makeshift trios will come out on top instead. And I know Cody is the star right now, especially in his own mind, but Bully and Burger would’ve made a better main event all things considered.

My Score: 8/10


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Mitchell’s Lucha Underground Report! (7/11/18)

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Lucha Underground Season 4

Lucha Underground Season 4, “Sacrificio”

The Monster, Matanza, is a demigod on a rampage, and he prepares another Sacrifice to the Gods! Is anyone on the Lucha Underground roster safe?!

 

Gifs to come courtesy of http://frentique.tumblr.com/

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Sacrifice to the Gods: Matanza Cueto VS Cortez Castro; Matanza wins, and Cortez is sacrificed.
  • Ancient Aztec Medallion match: Ivelisse VS Joey Ryan; Ivelisse wins.
  • Triple Threat Ancient Aztec Medallion match: Son of Havoc VS Killshot VS The Mack; Mack wins, he and Havoc earn medallions.
  • Ancient Aztec Medallion match: Mil Muertes w/ Catrina VS Cage; Muertes wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Cortez Castro is in the ring.

The dirty cop who was investigating Dario Cueto has been invited out by Antonio. Antonio’s sources have sniffed out that Cortez is an undercover cop. But that’s fine, because Antonio is reporting a murder. Well, not a murder, but a sacrifice!!

Sacrifice to the Gods: Matanza Cueto VS Cortez Castro!

Antonio is killing two birds with one stone, or perhaps a pig? Either way, Matanza rushes the ring in a hurry! Cortez tries to fight him off with that kendo stick, but to no avail. Matanza headbutts Cortez down, then whips for the WRATH OF THE GODS! Cover, Matanza wins!

Winner: Matanza Cueto, by pinfall

The Monster God has won, and the Believers call for “Sacrifice!” With another flash of bloody lightning, Cortez disappears! That makes two souls devoured by the Temple, how many more will be taken to satiate Matanza’s blood lust?

 

Ancient Aztec Medallion match: Ivelisse VS Joey Ryan!

The Baddest Bitch made an impact in her return when she hammered her ex, Jeremiah Crane, then shoved him in a casket. Meanwhile, The Big Sleazy just wants to spread the love. Or at least the baby oil… Who will grab hold of gold to qualify for the Gift of the Gods?

The bell rings and Joey tucks the lollipop in his pants. He knows Ivelisse wants him, but he won’t let her slap him. She still does, with the other hand. He pie faces her back, then he gives her a face full of chest hair! Ivelisse grabs that hair and throws him by it! She chops the chest hair off him, then springboards for an arm-drag. Joey staggers, but Ivelisse throws him more with headscissors. She gives him a back elbow, he gives her a SLAP! Joey climbs on and grinds her face into the mat. Fans boo and jeer, but Joey just enjoys it more. He covers, TWO. He tries again, TWO! One more time, TWO! Joey swears that’s six, because it adds up. The referee disagrees with that logic. Joey goes back to Ivelisse for a chinlock.

Fans rally up for Ivelisse, and she stands up. Ivelisse fights out with body shots, but Joey shoves her. She comes back into an Octopus! Joey breaks out but Ivelisse throws him out. Ivelisse builds speed, but runs into a SUPERKICK! Joey covers, but rather lazily, TWO! He’s shocked, but he has something up his sleeve. Or rather, in his pants. He pulls the lollipop, but Ivelisse snapmares and kicks him down! Both wrestlers slowly get up, then speed up. Ivelisse rallies and enziguris, cover, TWO! Joey gets to a corner but Ivelisse is on him with a chop and a whip. He reverses, then sleazes it up as he runs in, but into a SUPERKICK. Ivelisse runs, but into a spinebuster! Cover, TWO!

The Believers rally up, and Joey stalks Ivelisse. He goes for the chest but Ivelisse counters and kicks away. Ivelisse throws him with a German Suplex! Cover, TWO! Fans rally up again, and Ivelisse gets going. Joey catches her with a  shoulder to the stomach, then prepares a bomb. He lifts her up but she fights out. She slaps away, then scorpion kicks into the running Destroyer! Cover, Ivelisse wins!

Winner: Ivelisse, by pinfall; earns an Aztec Medallion

Finally, the Baddest joins the Gift of the Gods seven-way! Can she skyrocket to the top with a free shot at the Lucha Underground Champion?

 

Triple Threat Ancient Aztec Medallion match: Son of Havoc VS Killshot VS The Mack!

The Lucha Underground Trios Champions weren’t so sure about each other when Antonio Cueto just decided to lump the Man from the Open Road in for the MIA Dante Fox. But then they turned it around in their first defense together against Infamous Inc. Will they be able to keep things together when they’re forced to fight over such a tempting singles prize?

But wait, Antonio Cueto has been thinking about this match all night. It’s missing something. Three champions fighting for one medallion, that’s great. But he always asks himself, “Could it be greater?” Believers seem to think so. So in a brilliant flash, it came to him: it’s missing a second medallion! The only one who gets nothing is the one who gets pinned or submitted! The stakes just got raised, who will be the odd man out?

Lucha Underground returns and the match begins! And while Killshot targets Havoc, Mack doesn’t want the team to implode like this. Killshot moves him aside, but Havoc counters. Killshot slips out of the suplex and shoves Havoc into Mack’s shoulder. Mack swings a kick but Killshot ducks it. The champions stare down, but the two who have been a team longest are the ones arguing the strongest. Killshot kicks Mack and then throws him out. He goes after Havoc, then throws him to ropes. Havoc dodges and speeds up to DIVE on Mack! Killshot builds speed but handsprings out, only to run into Havoc’s boots. Havoc goes up to springboard, asai moonsault wipes out Killshot & Mack!

Fans rally for Havoc as he puts Mack in the ring. Havoc throws hands on Mack then whips him. Mack counters with an arm-drag, then runs into the corner. Havoc dodges but Mack headstands and twerks! Mack dodges Havoc to back elbow him into the corner. Havoc rolls out but Mack takes aim. Mack builds speed but Killshot moves to intercept, only to get the running enziguri! Killshot goes back out and Mack builds speed again to FLY! Mack wipes out Havoc and Killshot! Fans are fired up as Mack puts Killshot back in the ring. Killshot is dazed but he still swings on Mack. Mack blocks and SLAPS the taste out of his mouth. Mack chops Killshot sharp in the corner, then whips him to ropes. Killshot reverses and wrings the arm out, to then kick it out. He stalks Mack to a corner to then stomp that arm.

Killshot brings Mack up and chops him in return. He kicks the arm, then trips Mack up. Havoc returns but Killshot ducks under. Killshot gives him a tilt-o-whirl backbreaker. Mack hits Killshot from the apron but Killshot sweeps the legs to SUPERKICK Mack down. Fans rally for Killshot as he stalks Havoc. He slaps Havoc in the head, then says he’s not a brother in arms, he’s a nobody! Killshot slaps Havoc more, but Havoc gets fired up. Havoc hits back, and it’s a brawl of heavy forearms. They go back and forth but Havoc gets the edge. Killshot knees low, then runs, but Havoc follows. Tilt-o-whirl DDT brings Killshot down!

Mack returns slowly while the other two are still down. He stands, but Killshot and Havoc follow. Mack hits Killshot, Killshot hits Havoc, and Havoc hits Mack.

They keep going, and Mack kicks Killshot. Havoc boots Mack, then handsprings but misses. Mack POUNCES to send Havoc out! Mack whips Killshot out but Killshot bumps him back. Killshot then slings in and German suplexes, but Mack is up! But Mack runs into a Spanish Fly and dropkick! Believers know “This is Awesome!” but far from over. Havoc returns, and kicks Mack back. He climbs up, lines up the shot, an double double stomps them! Rebound cutter!

But Mack kicks Havoc to a corner. Mack runs in for a big left, then a boot wash! He keeps going, inverted cannonball! Havoc staggers up, Mack Samoan Drops and kip-ups to a moonsault! Cover, TWO!! Fans are loving Mack as he puts Havoc on the top rope. Mack slaps Havoc before climbing up to join him. Havoc resists, then fights back with body shots. He clubs away on Mack’s back, fast and furious! Havoc headbutts Mack down, then adjusts. Killshot returns to grab his beard! Killshot fireman’s carry, Death Valley on the apron! He puts Havoc in, then climbs up for the killer stomps! Mack Stunner! But who to pin!? The loser loses a medal, so he chooses Kilslhot! Mack wins!!

Winner: The Mack, by pinfall; only Killshot does not earn an Aztec Medallion

The Mack helps himself and Son of Havoc join the Gift of the Gods match, but leaves his older friend out in the cold. They’re all still Trios Champions, but it doesn’t seem like Killshot is happy with how it went down. He and the others argue it out, but Killshot slaps the medallion out of Mack’s hand. Dysfunction always seems to follow the Trios Titles, will it lead to a tag team implosion?

 

Ancient Aztec Medallion match: Mil Muertes w/ Catrina VS Cage!

The Man of 1000 Deaths and the Machine fought over the Gauntlet of the Gods last season, but both men are without that prize after King Cuerno stole it from Mil. But in the Temple, revenge always gains rewards, so perhaps this will make it up to Cage. Can the Machine overcome death in order to then pursue the Gift of the Gods and Pentagon Dark’s Lucha Underground Championship?

The two behemoths stare down, then start brawling! Cage knees low but Muertes hits back. Cage hits a jumping knee, then runs, but into a big right from Muertes. Muertes whips but Cage reverses. Muertes clubs Cage’s back but Cage clobbers him with a clothesline. Yet Muertes comes back with one of his own! Muertes whips Cage again, then pops Cage up, but to get a headscissors! Cage swings but misses, Muertes tilt-o-whirls! Then backstabber! Cage goes out of the ring, but Muertes pursues. Believers are dueling as Muertes brings Cage up to ram him into the apron. Then he throws Cage into railing. Cage gets up and SUPERKICKS Muertes! And throws Muertes into the railings. Cage throws forearm after forearm, and the Believers are rabid!

Cage grabs Catrina, but she’s not worried. Muertes rocks Cage with a right! Then Muertes bumps Cage off a chair, and puts him back in the ring. Muertes goes to bump Cage but Cage counters. Cage swing kicks, then climbs up to DEADLIFT SUPERPLEX Muertes into the ring! Cover, TWO! Cage is surprised, but not deterred. Fans duel more as Cage whips Muertes . Muertes slides to a stop to rock Cage. Cage staggers towards the ref, Muertes runs in, and SPEARS the ref!

Cage jumped out of the way, then discus clotheslines Muertes down! He covers, but no ref to count! The Believers count to about 5 before a replacement ref enters! He counts, TWO! If only he was there sooner, Cage would’ve won. Cage hears the Terminator drums, but then he suddenly clobbers that second ref!

Muertes hits the Flat Liner, covers, but a third ref is slow to appearing. TWO, and now Muertes is the one angry with authority. The referee is caught into a CHOKE SLAM! Muertes lifts Cage, Cage slips out but Muertes elbows back. Muertes goes to throw Cage but Cage throws Muertes into a post! Cage lifts Muertes in a pumphandle driver! But there’s still no referee. Muertes gets away, but fans know “This is Awesome!” Cage builds speed to FLY! The Machine wipes out Muertes, and Believers are losing their minds! Cage brings Muertes around to bump off the apron, then fireman’s carry. Muertes slips out to RAINMAKER! Or, maybe, Death Maker. Muertes brings out a chair, but Cage SUPERKICKS it into him! Cage scoop slams Muertes, then brings that chair over.

Cage soaks in the applause of the Believers, but that fan wearing the Cuerno mask takes off that mask to reveal… He’s Pentagon Dark!!

The Lucha Underground Champion is back for revenge after what Cage did to him weeks ago! CERO MIEDO!! And he attacks! The referees can’t disqualify this as Pentagon SMACKS Cage with the chair!

Pentagon puts Cage in the ring, and Muertes slithers in. Muertes stalks Cage, and SPEARS! The Reaper’s Trident sets up for the Flat Liner! Cover, count, Muertes wins!

Winner: Mil Muertes, by pinfall; earns an Aztec Medallion

With an assist to the Bone Collector, the Man of 1000 Deaths earns his spot in the Gift of the Gods title match. He asks Catrina to bless his victory with the Lick of Death, but she cannot. Seems that after gaining her mortality, she gave up her dark rituals. Muertes doesn’t understand, but he’s very upset with his femme fatale. They disappear into the shadows, for now.

Pentagon Dark speaks.

“Cage, don’t be sad because you didn’t win that medallion.” Don’t worry, because next week they will battle for the Lucha Underground Championship! Cage gets what he wants, but Pentagon tells him right now, that just like Aztec Warfare, the night will end with Pentagon still champion. And Cage, “mi amigo”, my friend, you will come out with a broken arm! Because Pentagon Dark has CERO MIEDO! Will the Machine make good on the free shot the Bone Collector is giving him? Or will he lose an arm along with the match?

 

The Rabbit Tribe has gone down the rabbit hole.

Paul London wonders, can this furniture get any smaller? Saltador finally speaks, saying he finds it “quite comfortable.” Mala Suerte seems to agree. Mascarita Sagrada finally returns. Alright, muchachos, the White Rabbit is ready to see you. Vaminos! Yes, let’s go! The tripped-out trio follow Mascarita further down the rabbit hole and…

“I have been waiting for you.” They bow before the great White Rabbit. They wish to have his guidance. Oh? In exchange for what? “Anything that you wish.” Anything, you say? Yes, anything. Then kill the man who brought you to him. Wait. Kill Mascarita? Tick tock, Mr. London! Kill Mascarita or you will not get your wish. Well okay… London raises the blunt instrument, and SPLATTERS poor Mascarita.

Bravo, Mr. London, bravo! That was very entertaining. And now, they shall see how far they’re really willing to go. What new madness has come to Lucha Underground?

 


 

My Thoughts:

A pretty good Lucha Underground episode, and all about the Aztec Medallions and Gift of the Gods. Unless I’ve lost count, I think there’s one medallion left, and we’ve got a great field of competitors already. Cuerno, Dragon Azteca, Ivelisse, The Mack, Son of Havoc, and now Mil Muertes. These six alone will put on a great match, adding just about anyone as the seventh will make it better. Ivelisse does pretty good against Joey Ryan, and she was a shoe-in between how fans love her and how Joey has been booked in LU. The twist for the triple threat was great, it really gives a great story for the Trios Champions without even needing another team to face. Though, I do expect them to put those titles on the line soon, and then lose them because Killshot quits on the team.

Muertes VS Cage was great, even before Pentagon made that surprise appearance. Pentagon giving Muertes the win is fine, as it helps bring up a new wrinkle in Catrina’s story: Muertes’ reaction. He’ll want explanations as to why Catrina didn’t do the Lick of Death, which has been a staple of their segments since the beginning. Meanwhile, Cage VS Pentagon is set and is going to be a great match. Honestly it could go either way, and creates suspense as to who the eventual Gift of the Gods Champion will be challenging. The only thing not related to Gift of the Gods was the Sacrifice. There wasn’t a whole lot of pomp and circumstance with it, but it seems this will be Lucha Underground’s way of doing squash matches. At the same time, sacrificing Cortez should trigger the story with Captain Perez, so that’ll be interesting.

My Score: 8.5/10


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Mitchell’s WWE NXT Report! (7/11/18)

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Which team will be the NXT Tag Team Champions after tonight?

The NXT Tag Team Championships are defended in a rematch from Royal Albert Hall! Will Mustache Mountain defeat the Undisputed Era in the US like in the UK?

 

All images courtesy of the WWE’s official Twitter

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Adam Cole VS Danny Burch; Cole wins.
  • Kairi Sane VS Vanessa Borne; Kairi wins.
  • NXT Tag Team Championships: Mustache Mountain VS The Undisputed Era’s Kyle O’Reilly & Roderick Strong; The Undisputed Era wins and become the new NXT Tag Team Champions.

PLAY BY PLAY

Adam Cole VS Danny Burch!

The NXT North American Champion didn’t appreciate the British Brawler’s bad mouthing, or his challenge to a match 1v1. GM William Regal did, though, and has made this non-title match! Can Burch hit back on the Panama City Playboy in place of the injured Boston Brawler, Oney Lorcan?

The bell rings and fans duel. Cole and Burch circle then tie up. Burch pushes Cole back but Cole comes back with a wristlock. Burch reverses to a wristlock but Cole rolls and reverses. Cole gets a hammerlock but Burch spins through to overhead suplex Cole to the mat. Burch has the armlock and grinds Cole on the mat. Cole gets up and out with a stiff forearm. Burch sits down, but Cole is on him with a headlock takeover. “I don’t think so, Danny!” he trash talks as he grinds Burch’s head. Burch works his way back up, then powers out. Cole runs him over with a shoulder, then runs again. Things speed up and Burch runs Cole over in return. Burch runs, things speed up again, but Burch sees the dropkick coming. He counters with a drop toehold, but Cole pushes him away.

Burch side steps Cole to rock him with a forearm! Cole ends up outside but Burch fetches him. Cole shoves Burch into a post, then hits a neckbreaker to the floor! The ref has them get back in, and Cole leaves Burch down. The count climbs, but Burch beats it at 8. Cole is on him with another neckbreaker. Cover, TWO. Burch clutches his neck and gets to a corner, but Cole keeps his eyes on him. Cole walks over but into a right hand. Cole blocks the boot to stomp a mudhole into Burch, then backs off at 4. He drags Burch up for a snap suplex, then drives in a knee to the back. Cole trash talks Burch as he drives in another. Burch writhes to the ropes, but Cole says he’s “not in my league.”

Cole puts Burch in a corner, then throws forearms and body shots. Cole backs off at 4, then brings Burch out for a scoop slam. Cover, TWO! Burch rolls away but Cole is right on him with a chinlock. Fans rally up and Burch feeds off the energy. Burch fights back with body shots, but Cole bicycle boots him down! Cole drags Burch back up for elbows to the back of the neck. Burch gets to ropes but Cole keeps on him. Cole snapmares Burch back into the snapmare. “You’ll never beat me. Ever!” Fans rally up and Burch jawbreakers free. Burch chops and chops away on Cole, but Cole shoves. Burch ducks to Thesz Press and rain down hands.

Cole gets to a corner but Burch gives him a corner European Uppercut and clothesline, then a swing kick for good measure. Burch hops up, missile dropkick! Then a kip-up! He fires up, as do the fans. Burch drags Cole up, but Cole fireman’s carry. Burch slips out for a German Suplex, then a big lariat. Cover, TWO! Into a crossface! Cole is trapped, but he rolls free. Burch comes back with EuroUpper, headbutt and knee. Then another headbutt! Cole staggers, but Burch is on him in the corner. Burch hangs Cole up top, for London Tower! Cover, TWO!! So close and yet so far from pinning the NXT North American Champion. Burch gets up, keeping his cool. Fans rally up as Burch brings Cole back up. Cole resists the bomb, but Burch clubs away.

Burch suplexes but Cole knees out. Cole fakes Burch out for the mule kick, then the bicycle kick, to Ushigoroshi! Cover, TWO! Cole grows frustrated with Burch, but he knows “nobody can beat me!” Fans rally up again as Cole takes aim. SUPERKICK! But Cole isn’t done there, he brings Burch up for the Last Shot brainbuster! Then, with knee pad down, Cole runs for the Last Shot shining wizard! Cover, Cole wins!

Winner: Adam Cole, by pinfall

Burch proves how tough he is, but in the end, Cole wins again. Will the North American Champion’s reign continue without finding a worthy contender?

 

NXT Media interviews Candice LeRae.

Mrs. Wrestling knows she’s close to the championship, but then she encounters and confronts the NXT Women’s Champion. Shayna Baszler wants the little lady to stick to being the “cute little sidekick.” Candice slaps Shayna, and a brawl began! Referees, security and other women superstars had to pull them apart! There is a fire burning in the Women’s Division, will a match be the only thing that puts it out?

 

Backstage interview with Dakota Kai.

The Captain of Team Kick has heard the choice words of the Queen of Spades. But Dakota is going to face Shayna again really soon. She’s working her way up the ladder and will get another title shot. But the Lady of NXT, Lacey Evans, says no one cares what Dakota thinks. If those “dirty paws” ever grabbed the title, she’d just bring it down. What the Women’s Division is a lady with class, confidence and sophistication to elevate it. Let’s be honest, that’s not Dakota. Oh, so she goes from talking trash online to talking trash in face. How about Dakota kicks her class next week in a match? Lacey seems to accept the challenge, will she exercise her Woman’s Right to a victory? Or will all her talk be taken out with the trash?

 

Kairi Sane VS Vanessa Borne!

The vivacious Vanessa is bold enough to call out the inaugural Mae Young Classic winner, all over the Pirate Princess’ choice of costume. Will Kairi show Vanessa why she was a star of Stardom? Or will Vanessa get the upset and sink Kairi’s ship?

Fans are strongly behind Kairi at the bell. She and Vanessa circle, then tie up. Vanessa powers Kairi back to a corner, but shoves out of the break. Kairi puts her in the corner to push her, then honors the break. She threatens a punch, but just boops Vanessa on the forehead. Vanessa rushes out but into a waistlock. Vanessa standing switches and throws Kairi down. Kairi avoids the stomp, then blocks the kick, to Dragon Screw! Kairi runs, and rolls for a leg tweak. Cover, TWO, into a toe-and-ankle hold! Vanessa crawls to a ropebreak. Kairi lets go, and backs off to dare Vanessa to come back for more. Vanessa does, but runs into a crucifix! Kairi isn’t strong enough to bring Vanessa down, though, and Vanessa turns it into a Samoan Drop! Cover, TWO!

Vanessa keeps on Kairi with a body scissor squeeze. She throws forearms into Kairi, but fans rally up. Kairi endures and turns around to throw forearms at Vanessa. Vanessa forearms Kairi more, then brings her up for a spinning suplex! Cover, TWO, and Vanessa grows frustrated. Vanessa rams her knees and elbows into Kairi, then stomps her to a corner. Fans cheer Kairi on but Vanessa toys and trash talks the Pirate Princess. She throws Kairi to ropes for a motorcycle stretch! Vanessa lets go at 4, but turns things around into a draping cloverleaf! She even kicks away at Kairi’s back until the ref counts 4.

Vanessa throws Kairi down, then drops a big elbow. Fans rally up as Vanessa throws Kairi around more. Vanessa walks on Kairi, then climbs up top. She demands fans cheer for her, but then she misses the Vader Bomb! Kairi gets up and runs in, Blockbuster! Kairi and Vanessa slowly stand, and Kairi fires off double chops! She whips Vanessa but Vanessa reverses. Kairi rebounds to headscissor, then Interceptor spear! Kairi fires up while Vanessa crawls to the corner. Marching the plank, Kairi runs in for the Sliding D forearm! Kairi climbs up top, but Vanessa headbutts her. Vanessa throws Kairi down from the top rope! She’s not done, either, as she brings Kairi up. Kairi revives for the spinning back-fist. Vanessa clubs away on Kairi in return, then rolls her to a cover, TWO, and Kairi gets a modified cloverleaf of her own! Kairi calls this the Anchor Lock!

Vanessa taps, Kairi wins!

WInner: Kairi Sane, by submission

The Pirate Princess brings out something brand new, and it works! Vanessa is improving, but not enough to stop this great Stardom champion. Will Kairi sail towards an NXT Women’s Championship?

Kairi speaks.

“Shayna Baszler. I know you are strong, but I beat you before.” The MYC finals in fact. Kairi vows to do it again! And again! And again! “Again! Again!” echoes out with the NXT Universe. Kairi vows to come for that treasure, that NXT Women’s Championship! “Ahoy!”

 

Just in from NXT GM William Regal!

Seeing as how there are so many worthy contenders for Shayna Baszler’s title, it seems only fitting to give them all a chance! It will be a FATAL 4 WAY to decide a new #1 Contender! The Pirate Princess has one victory over the Queen of Spades, while Crazy Nikki Cross came close. At the same time, Mrs. Wrestling wants at Shayna something fierce over the comments the champ had for her, as does The EST, Bianca Belair! One woman will move on to be the number one, who will challenge the Reign of Terror?

 

NXT Media speaks with Aleister Black.

With two weeks left before the Embodiment of the End faces the Psycho Killer, the NXT Champion knows there’s always someone who thinks they’ll change things. But then Johnny Wrestling comes by and says Ciampa cannot be champion. Aleister doesn’t seem to take him seriously. Gargano wants to make sure Ciampa doesn’t win. Alesiter does understand that, but Gargano has to let him be the one to handle it. Gargano needs to worry about himself in the meantime. Gargano knows exactly what he’s doing. Aleister and Gargano part ways, the champion headed to the ring. But then Ciampa attacks Aleister! The Blackheart doesn’t want to wait two weeks, as he drags Aleister out onto a table for a draping DDT!!

Ciampa leaves Aleister down and out while medics are called. Ciampa waves good-bye, but will he be waving a white flag come their title match? Or has he just made Aleister’s reign #FadetoBlack?

 

NXT Tag Team Championships: Mustache Mountain VS The Undisputed Era’s Kyle O’Reilly & Roderick Strong!

While the Undisputed Era love to #ShockTheSystem, they were the ones shocked when Tyler Bate & Trent Seven defeated them in the Royal Albert Hall during the United Kingdom Championship special. The UE tried to deny it, claiming it was a fluke, but will they succeed in taking back the titles? Or will Mustache Mountain simply go 2-0 and send the Undisputed Era to the back of the line?

Fans duel already as the introductions are being made. The belts are raised and the bell rings, and Undisputed rush the champions! Strong goes after Seven while O’Reilly goes after Bate. They have them in opposite corners, then whip them out, but Mustache Mountain do-si-do to hit EuroUppers! Seven lifts and slams O’Reilly, then Bate slams Strong on top of him. Bate gets to a corner and knee-boards off Seven to senton on them both. Seven and Bate coordinate for the assisted back senton. Strong and O’Reilly get to ropes, but they get whipped across the way. They hold ropes to bail out, then regroup. Bate & Seven throw them out, but Undisputed come back in quick, only to fall for Bop and BANG!

Strong & O’Reilly go back outside but Bate & Seven keep on them. They brawl and chop outside, and Bate throws O’Reilly into the apron. Seven has Strong on the other side, throwing body shots at the steps. O’Reilly kicks Bate back, then goes to help Strong. They bump Seven into a post, then a shinbreaker to the steps!

Seven goes down in a heap, but Strong is still on him. They go into the ring while fans continue to duel at a fever pitch. Strong stomps the bad leg then tags in O’Reilly. O’Reilly runs to knee drop the bad knee. Seven does what he can to cover up as O’Reilly throws fast strikes. O’Reilly jams the knee with a leg DDT, then drags Seven back. Tag to Strong and Strong goes right at the leg brace. Strong pulls it off to expose the knee to stop it directly. Tag back to O’Reilly for dragon screws and a standing Indian deathlock! O’Reilly twists the leg, but Seven can only fight from the mat. Seven tries to get to Bate but O’Reilly cartwheels to more ground ‘n’ pound palm strikes. O’Reilly gets an outside heel hook! Tag to Strong and they torture the leg.

Fans have not slowed down one bit in their dueling chants. Strong goes after the knee but Seven fights as much as he can. Seven grabs hair but Strong doesn’t let go of the leg. Seven endures the pain, and kicks away with his free leg. Strong lets go, but tags O’Reilly. O’Reilly is on that bad leg, smashing it against the ropes! Seven manages to counter with a roll up, TWO! Seven shoves O’Reilly away but Strong tags back in. Strong whips but Seven kicks him away. Seven dumps Strong out but Strong drags Seven down. Seven shoves again, but O’Reilly runs in. O’Reilly gets tossed out hard, and Seven crawls! Bate is ready, but Strong anchors Seven long enough for O’Reilly to get to Bate! Seven misses his chance, and now Strong is on him again.

Strong puts the legs in an Indian deathlock and grinds his heel into the knee. Seven fights and endures, throwing hands and chops on Strong. Strong lets him go, but only long enough to bring him up. Seven chops, even on one leg. He fakes a chop, blocks a chop, and hits a DDT! Strong and Seven crawl, but O’Reilly boots Bate down! Seven chops O’Reilly, but O’Reilly gets the leg! Seven endures the heel hook, and fights with the other leg. O’Reilly lets go from being rocked by that right foot. Seven drags himself over, but so does O’Reilly. Hot tags to Bate and Strong! Bate rallies on the Undisputed Era! Big back drop for Strong! Then a corner EuroUpper. Bate whips corner to corner but Strong reverses, only to run into that knee lift! Flying EuroUpper, then the standing shooting star! Cover, TWO!

This match has been high energy from the start, but now fans are really fired up. O’Reilly runs in but gets taken for a ride. O’Reilly slips into a sleeper on Bate, but Bate bumps him off buckles. Strong runs in, but into an Exploder onto O’Reilly! Bate picks up Strong and spins him around, but then catches O’Reilly! Now we go for a spin AND a swing! Flashback to Royal Albert Hall!

Bate puts them both down on top of each other, then deadlifts Strong for a bridging German! TWO!! Seven is getting his knee checked on, but he knows Bate is going it alone right now. Fans are at a fever pitch as Bate slowly stands. Bate sees Seven is still in a bad way, so he goes after Strong. He tries the double underhook but has to rolling kick O’Reilly out. Bate runs into Strong’s boot, enziguri, and then whip. Rebound lariat from Bate! Then, TYLER DRIVER ’97!! Cover, but O’Reilly breaks it just in time! This match continues, but fans are loving it! Bate throws O’Reilly out, then checks on Seven. Seven wants to get in, because “This is Awesome!”

Bate isn’t so sure himself, his mentor is too wounded. Strong hits Bate but Bate hits Strong. Strong whips but counters the rebound for a half-nelson backbreaker! Tag to O’Reilly, Penalty Kick! Cover, TWO! But right into the brainbuster!! Cover, TWO!! Bate toughs it out for the sake of his mentor, but O’Reilly tags in Strong. The Undisputed Era coordinate but Bate fights them both off. Bate escapes Total Elimination! Strong has Bate but Bate hits back. Knee strike sends Bate into Seven! Seven tags and starts chopping away on Strong & O’Reilly! His one leg and both arms are working, so he uses them both to fire away strikes. He gets O’Reilly in a Snap Dragon! Then dodges Seven for a back hand and SEVEN STAR LARIAT!! Cover, TWO!!

This match isn’t done, but neither is Seven. Fans are thunderous while Seven and Strong slowly stand. Seven tries the torture rack, but that bad leg limits him. Strong escape to chop block the leg! Then, Inverted Cloverleaf! But Seven holds and attacks Strong’s leg to resist. Seven is stuck in a Strong Clutch, but Bate boots Strong down! Bate has to back off, but Seven shoves Strong away hard. O’Reilly tags in, and O’Reilly leaps onto Seven with a knee to knee! Then the heel hook returns! Seven endures like nothing before as he hammers away at O’Reilly’s own leg. Seven grabs the ref to resist tapping. He reaches for Bate, reaches for ropes, but is still so far away.

O’Reilly drags Seven all the way back, but Seven kicks and slaps. It’s a slap fight on the mat! O’Reilly wrenches back, but Seven still finds the grit to fight. Fans chant “YES! YES!” with every hit, and Seven frees himself! Seven crawls but so does O’Reilly. O’Reilly stays between Seven and Bate. Fans duel again, but O’Reilly goes for another leg hold! It’s a double knee bar!! Seven screams in pain, and Bate sees his mentor in pain. Bate grabs a towel, but Seven tells him not to throw it! Seven rolls for the ropes, for his corner, but O’Reilly wrenches back as hard as he can. Bate is so torn between pride and compassion, but Seven shouts for him not to quit! Seven fights with everything he has left, but Bate can’t do it! He throws in the towel!!

Winners: The Undisputed Era, by submission; NEW NXT Tag Team Champions

Bate couldn’t do it. He couldn’t watch his mentor, his brother in arms, suffer any longer. But that’s fine by the Undisputed Era’s standards, they just got their belts back. They all celebrate on the ramp, from O’Reilly to Strong to Cole and Fish. This is what it took to get those belts back, what will it take for someone to take them away?

 


 

My Thoughts:

This was a damn good NXT! All three matches felt strong, and can be considered as contributing to story. Adam Cole fights fair and square in his match with Burch, but he really couldn’t call upon the rest of the Undisputed Era given how important the main event was. But Cole does win fair and square, and so far he has no contenders to his title. There’s plenty of time before the next TakeOver special, so perhaps one will step up in the coming weeks. Vanessa does great even in losing to Kairi, but Kairi winning was only natural for the inaugural MYC winner. That Fatal 4 Way is going to be great, but if there’s one person we know isn’t winning, it’s Nikki Cross. Nikki is meant to join SAnitY on the main roster one way or another, but it could go any which way with the other three.

Of those three, bet more on Candice or Kairi. Bianca is still more Heel than Face, and even if this is NXT, it’s still WWE, and they prefer Face VS Heel. From there, either choice is great, because we either get the tiebreaker of Kairi VS Shayna, or we get the continuation of that sudden brawl between Shayna and Candice. In the NXT  Championship story, I did not expect Ciampa to pounce on Aleister like that. Maybe the night of their title match, but not this far out. They’ll play up Aleister’s condition next week, but I’m pretty sure he makes it to the match. But now I’m even more unsure of how that’ll go, what with Gargano adamant about Ciampa NOT winning the title before him. Maybe Gargano interferes just as Ciampa is about to win, which will Aleister as much as Ciampa, for a triple threat?

Then that main event was probably the best NXT Tag Team Championship match ever! Definitely one of the best since DIY VS Revival, DIY VS AoP, and the like. They also heaped a bunch of story into the match with that steel step shinbreaker and all the leg holds. You could really feel the animosity from the Undisputed Era, as well as the emotional conflict in Bate. Commentary did a great job reminding us that Seven trained Bate, and was anywhere from a big brother to a father figure for the younger wrestler. It’s rare for a match to end with someone literally throwing in the towel, but it really worked here. Undisputed Era wins while Mustache Mountain isn’t really weaker for it. Obviously Mustache Mountain’s rematch is in question with Seven’s bad leg, but I really hope we get a tiebreaker in the end.

My Score: 8.8/10


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