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Mitchell’s WWE Greatest Royal Rumble Report! (4/27/18)

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From the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, WWE brings us a massive Network special! Seven championship matches, from both Raw and SmackDown, and even 205 Live! A Casket Match between the Undertaker and Rusev! John Cena VS Triple H! And as the main event, the first ever FIFTY Man Royal Rumble match!

 

All images courtesy of the WWE Network streaming service

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • John Cena VS Triple H; Cena wins.
  • WWE Cruiserweight Championship: Cedric Alexander VS Kalisto; Alexander wins and retains the Cruiserweight Championship.
  • Raw Tag Team Championships: The Bar VS WOKEN Matt Hardy VS Bray Wyatt; Hardy & Wyatt win and become the new Raw Tag Team Champions.
  • WWE United States Championship: Jeff Hardy VS Jinder Mahal w/ Sunil Singh; Hardy wins and retains the United States Championship.
  • SmackDown Tag Team Championships: The Bludgeon Brothers VS The Usos; The Bludgeon Brothers win and retain the SmackDown Tag Team Championships.
  • WWE Intercontinental Championship Fatal 4 Way Ladder Match: Seth Rollins VS Finn Balor VS The Miz VS Samoa Joe; Rollins wins and retains the Intercontinental Championship.
  • WWE Championship: AJ Styles VS Shinsuke Nakamura; Double Count Out, Styles retains the WWE Championship.
  • Casket Match: The Undertaker VS Rusev w/ Aiden English; Undertaker wins.
  • WWE Universal Championship Steel Cage Match: Brock Lesnar VS Roman Reigns; Lesnar wins and retains the Universal Championship.
  • 50-Man Royal Rumble match: Braun Strowman wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Byron Saxton, Jerry “The King” Lawler & Booker T are your Kickoff Show panel!

They give us the rundown on the match card order, and are most excited to see the fans’ faces as they watch this massive first-time event. King looks forward to seeing the Undertaker back in a Casket Match, and Booker looks forward to seeing if Nakamura can grab that WWE Championship from AJ Styles. Speaking of Styles, he’ll be in the Social Media Lounge later on, so get ready to #AskAJ your questions.

 

The Miz speaks.

“Samoa Joe, Finn Balor and Seth Rollins are terrible people.” They’re going to make his baby girl cry if Miz loses. But luckily, Miz is a winner and will cement his legacy as the greatest Intercontinental Champion of all time. And that’s AWESOME.

 

Backstage interview with Jinder Mahal

The Modern Day Maharaja wants his United States Championship back. But he hasn’t won a match since being traded to Raw. It’s only two losses! Losers like Mike Rome just want to belittle former champions like Mahal. He still complains that he was not ready for defending his title against Jeff Hardy. However, Mahal is ready now, and is confident he’ll take the title back. Can Mahal reclaim the US Championship against the Charismatic Enigma in Saudi Arabia?

 

The Bar speaks.

“Well, well, well…” Sheamus & Cesaro know Hardy & Wyatt think they’re WONDERFUL~, but they’re just insane. Whether Woken or Broken, they’ll just be chokin’ on some Brogues! The screw-loose duo will be two titles short of being champions. Cesaro & Sheamus don’t just set the bar, they ARE The Bar, but will they be champions again?

 

Good ol’ JR joins the panel!

JR is honored to be part of history, especially this amazing atmosphere that’s “doing a lot of good in a lot of ways.” The Saudi Arabia WWE Universe is just as excited to see him.

 

AJ Styles is in the Social Medial Lounge.

The WWE Champion is set for a rematch from the Dream (Re)Match at Wrestlemania. He beat Shinsuke Nakamura fair and square on the Grandest Stage of Them All, but Nakamura ruined the moment with a low blow. Nakamura has since then tormented Styles with more low blows and several #Knees2Face. Styles now answers the fans’ questions under the tag, #AskAJ.

“What is your strategy against the new attitude” of Nakamura? Styles hasn’t changed plans, because this Nakamura is easier to prepare for. Nakamura takes cheap shots, and has shown his true colors, so Styles knows what to expect. “What was it like to be teamed up with Gallows & Anderson again?” The Club reunion put a smile on Styles’ face. Teaming in Japan was special, teaming on SmackDown will be just as special. “What went through your mind when Nakamura hit you with the low blow at Wrestlemania”, especially with all the respect between them? Styles did respect Nakamura, who he thought was a great person. That was a major shock, and it broke many hearts, to see that happen. But now Styles looks for payback to make it all right. The Phenomenal One now prepares for that major rematch, can he win all over again?

 

Paul Heyman surprises the panel!

The Advocate of the Beast agrees with King: “Roman Reigns doesn’t have a shot, does he?” Not against Brock Lesnar in a cage. And he won’t just lose, Roman will take a beating from Lesnar because Lesnar won’t let Roman take the Universal Championship. Lesnar will not let himself be embarrassed in front of such a massive, global audience. Lesnar is here because he truly wants to be in a cage with Roman, the man who kicked out of five F5’s, and finish Roman off. This will be the “declarative” moment of Brock Lesnar’s career. Roman won’t kick out, he’ll just take a beating and a defeat. Lesnar will then go after the UFC championship even as the “reigning, defending, undisputed Universal Heavyweight Champion”. Has Heyman given yet another “spoiler”?

 

Superstars speak on the 50-Man Royal Rumble.

Braun Strowman loves competition, and this match offers more of that than any match before it. Superstars, legends both past and future, Strowman wants to go first just make sure everyone will #GetTheseHands. The New Day want to know who, who who who, will be the winner? There can be only one, and that one has to be… Kofi Kingston! He is Mr. Royal Rumble, Mr. 24/7, and Mr. Trickster. This year’s trick will be winning, and that means we all win! Becaaaause~, New! Day Rocks!

 

The National Anthems of Saudi Arabia, and the United States of America, open the show.

 

The countdown begins.

Whatever language you speak, everyone knows history is being made. Saudi Arabia is the stage upon the truly largest Royal Rumble match itself is being held. It is also the stage for SEVEN championship matches that could change the landscape of WWE all over again. It may also be the place where Rusev Day Rests… In… Peace. And it could be where one man leaves the other for dead inside a steel cage. “Tonight, the eyes of the universe” all look to Arabia, and the Greatest Royal Rumble Ever.

 

John Cena VS Triple H!

Two of the best, most decorated champions in WWE History. They’ve had amazing matches in the past as both men have chased the world championship record set by The Nature Boy. This isn’t for anything more than pride, who will take that glory on this historic stage?

The bell rings and fans are already fired up as these two future Hall of Famers circle. They tie up, Cena pushes HHH back but HHH shoves Cena to a corner. Cena gets right up while HHH grins. Fans duel, “Let’s Go Cena!” “Cena Sucks!” Seems that chant follows Cena around the world. He and HHH tie up again, HHH pushes Cena back but this time, Cena shoves HHH down. Cena gives the “You Can’t See Me” while HHH gets back up. HHH shrugs it off while the fans are thunderous for this match. Cena calls for a test of strength, and HHH accepts. They tie up again and go shoulder to shoulder with the knuckle lock. Neither man backs down but HHH does have Cena falling to his knees.

HHH looms over Cena, but he can’t get Cena all the way down. Cena powers up and the fans rally behind him. Cena turns the tables but HHH kicks low. HHH whips Cena and runs him over with a shoulder. HHH even mocks the “You Can’t See Me” to Cena. He whips but Cena reverses and runs HHH over now! HHH flounders to a corner but Cena whips him corner to corner. HHH evades and then rocks Cena with a right hand. He drags Cena up and into a corner for a buckle bump, then rocks him with another right. The fans are a mix as HHH again mocks the “You Can’t See Me”, but Cena rolls him up! ONE and HHH clobbers Cena. Cover, TWO, but HHH keeps his cool.

HHH stalks Cena to a corner, and throws more right hands. He whips Cena corner to corner while fans duel, Cena hits buckles hard and hits the mat. HHH looms over Cena again, then whips Cena corner to corner even harder. HHH takes his time going back to Cena, then gives him more right hands. He whips corner to corner but Cena blocks! Cena fires off right hands and whips but HHH reverses, HHH gets Cena in the sleeper hold! Cena fades but the fans rally for him. He fights his way back up and pries his way out, then blocks HHH kick to get running. Cena hits the shoulder tackles, then goes for the spin-out, but HHH reverses with a headlock takeover to then deck Cena with a right!

HHH stalks Cena to the ropes and gives a right hand. Cena hits back and they go back and forth. Cena gets the edge, whips HHH but HHH comes back with the knee smash. Cover, TWO! That was a close one. Cena rolls to ropes but HHH is upon him again. HHH wants but Cena denies, Cena lifts but HHH grabs ropes. HHH slips off but Cena gets the Sit-Out Powerbomb! And now Cena gives HIS “You Can’t See Me!” But HHH is ready, he hits a saido suplex! And then HHH says “You Can’t See Me!” “Suck It!” Five Knuckle Shuffle, cover, TWO! HHH keeps his cool and goes for the Pedigree, but Cena whips out and throws HHH all the way out!

Cena rolls out to fetch HHH, and bumps him off the barriers. Cena also bounces HHH off a post, then puts him back in the ring. He climbs up to the top, and hits a flying– No, HHH counters the leg drop into a powerbomb! Cover, TWO! HHH grows frustrated, and both men are down. The fans rally again as they stir. HHH and Cena stand while the fans duel. HHH starts another brawl, but Cena’s haymakers hit heavy. The Game still hits back, but he gets caught with a drop toehold and the STF!

Cena has HHH trapped, but HHH powers his way around towards ropes. Cena shouts for HHH to tap as he wrenches back. HHH keeps going so Cena lets him go to drag him back. HHH shoves Cena way, Cena runs back in, but into HHH’s spinebuster! Cover, TWO! Cena rolls to a corner while HHH catches his breath. HHH walks over to throw more punches, then climbs up to hammer away. He gets only 4 before Cena powers him away for another Spin-Out, then the Five Knuckle Shuffle! Fireman’s carry, Cena gives HHH the AA!

Cover, TWO!? Somehow HHH kicks out at the very last second! HHH can’t believe it, but the fans are loving it. Cena stands up and he’s ready. HHH staggers up, Cena lifts him again, but HHH slips out! Pedigree!

Cover, TWO!! Cena survives HHH’s best move, too! Both men are down but the fans are still rallying. Both Cena and HHH stir, but HHH is up first. He wants another, but Cena lifts, sunset flip counter! TWO, back to the STF! HHH is again trapped, but he again wills himself towards ropes. Cena’s grip loosens, HHH slips around to a crossface! HHH wrenches back but Cena powers his way up to the fireman’s carry! And another AA! Then a catapult into corner, for a THIRD AA!! Cover, Cena wins!

Winner: Cena, by pinfall

“Big Match John” does it again! He took on one of the best and wins out, because he himself is one of the very best. History was made, but history also still waits. Will Cena one day become the record-breaking 17 time world champion?

Cena speaks to Saudi Arabia.

“What an honor and a privilege it is” to be part of this event. Regardless of what’s going on in his life, he wasn’t going to miss this for anything. Cena genuinely thanks Saudi Arabia for its hospitality that extends far beyond today. And he thanks the fans for allowing him to be part of it.

 

WWE Cruiserweight Championship: Cedric Alexander VS Kalisto!

The former champion in the Lucha Dragon won a Gauntlet Match on 205 Live. Now he challenges the Soul of the Cruiserweight Division for the title Alexander won at Wrestlemania. Will the #AgeOfAlexander survive in Saudi Arabia?

The bell rings and the two circle. Kalisto starts up a “Lucha! Lucha!” chant, then ties up with Alexander. Alexander grabs Kalisto’s arm to wrench it, but Kalisto rolls and flips to reverse it. Alexander does the same, but Kalisto cartwheels to reverse it again. Another reversal back for Alexander, but Kalisto uses the ropes to arm-drag him away. Alexander handsprings back to headscissor, but Kalisto lands on his feet. The fans applaud the even match. Things speed up, Kalisto handstands and headscissors, Alexander lands on his back. “Lucha! Lucha!” starts up again before Kalisto runs at Alexander. Alexander side-steps and Kalisto tumbles to the apron. Alexander runs but Kalisto dumps him out of the ring! Kalisto takes aim to slingshot and springboard!

Down goes Alexander! Kalisto and the fans chant “Lucha! Lucha!” as he puts Alexander back in the ring. Kalisto takes aim again as he climbs up top, but Alexander ducks under Kalisto. Alexander puts Kalisto back on the apron, and hits Kalisto with a Listo kick! Then he FLIES!

Down goes Kalisto now! Alexander gets Kalisto back in the ring, but that shoulder bothers him. Cover, TWO, so Alexander keeps on Kalisto with a bearhug. Kalisto endures while the fans build to a rally. Kalisto stands up and fights out of the hold. He runs, but into Alexander’s dropkick! Cover, TWO! Alexander grows frustrated, but he goes back to the bearhug. He squeezes Kalisto again while fans rally once more. Kalisto works his way back up, but Alexander just slams him back down! Kalisto endures again, but makes his way up a third time, only for Alexander to slam him all over again. Alexander adds more pressure through his full weight.

Fans rally for Kalisto, and Kalisto tries one more time. He arm-drags out of the slam, then goes to boot. Alexander blocks that and sends Kalisto to the apron, but Kalisto hits Alexander witht he Listo kick. Kalisto springboards for the crossbody! Kalisto mule kicks and hits the Spike-Rana, then runs for the tilt-o-whirl DDT! Cover, TWO! Alexander is dazed but both he and Kalisto are stirring. Kalisto drags Alexander up but Alexander keeps pushing him away. Alexander rams Kalisto into buckles, then runs in, but into a back elbow. Kalisto hops up, and jumps but Alexander gets under to then hit a sudden Michinoku Driver! Cover, TWO!

Alexander keeps his focus, and glares at the resilient Kalisto. Alexander takes off the elbow pads and dares Kalisto to get up. He then runs in but Kalisto evades. Alexander knocks Kalisto away but Kalisto kicks the slingshot down! Kalisto climbs up but Alexander fights with him. They brawl but Kalisto climbs. Kalisto goes for the Super Steiner, but Alexander blocks! Alexander brings Kalisto back up, but Kalisto fires off punches, and hits the springboard SUPER Spanish Fly!

The landing takes a lot out of Kalisto, but he covers, TWO!! And just barely. Both men slowly stir. Alexander pushes and chops Kalisto, but Kalisto kicks back. They go back and forth, Kalisto gets a strike fest of palm strikes, but Alexander uses a European Uppercut! Alexander runs but Kalisto goes Matrix to dodge, but Alexander also dodges, to rock Kalisto with a back elbow. Alexander lifts Kalisto, but Kalisto counters with a huricanrana that sends Alexander into buckles. Kalisto comes back for Salida Del– LUMBAR CHECK!

Cover, Alexander wins!

Winner: Alexander, by pinfall; still Cruiserweight Champion

Alexander wins his first title defense and continues his reign. However, this will not be the end of challengers who want that title. Who will step up to challenge him in the coming days of the #AgeOfAlexander?

 

Raw Tag Team Championships: The Bar VS WOKEN Matt Hardy VS Bray Wyatt!

This WONDERFUL match came about because 1) Braun Strowman and 10-year old Nicholas won the titles at Wrestlemania but had to vacate them, because Nicholas is again only 10 years old, and 2) the #DeletersOfWorlds won a Tag Team Eliminator to earn a title shot. Can the Celtic Gladiator & Swiss Cyborg win back the titles, or will they be… DELETED!?

Hardy and Cesaro start for their teams with the bell. Fans chant “DELETE! DELETE!” as they tie up. Cesaro pushes Hardy but Hardy puts Cesaro in a corner. Hardy honors the break, then tells Cesaro that Hardy will “DELETE!” him. But Cesaro counters with “The Bar!” “DELETE!” “The Bar!” “DELETE!” “The Bar!” Cesaro kicks but Hardy blocks, Cesaro pushes but Hardy runs him over. Hardy drags Cesaro up and tags in Bray, for a unique combination of headbutt and neckbreaker! Bray keeps on Cesaro with an uppercut, but Cesaro boots back. Cesaro tags Sheamus and they stomp a mudhole into Bray. Sheamus whips Bray but Bray reverses, only for Sheamus to kick him back. But then Sheamus runs into the turn-around clothesline!

Bray tags Hardy back in, they double whip Sheamus to double elbow, then leg drop and back senton. Cesaro runs in but gets hands. That was WONDERFUL~! Hardy clotheslines Sheamus in a corner then hits a neckbreaker, cover, ONE. “DELETE! DELETE!” then a kick, but Sheamus denies the twist. Hardy elbows back but Cesaro gets the cheap shot hotshot! Sheamus runs Hardy over, then shoves Hardy outside so Cesaro can get another cheap shot. Bray protests, but The Bar gets away with it. Sheamus goes out to give a clubbing clothesline, then puts Hardy back in the ring. He grounds Hardy with a facelock, but Bray rallies the fans. Hardy reaches, but Sheamus tags Cesaro. The Bar goes Super Saiyan kicks! Cover, TWO, but Cesaro keeps Hardy from his Woken corner.

Cesaro wraps Hardy up in an armlock, but fans rally for the Woken Wisdom. Hardy stands up and fights back, but Cesaro tags in Sheamus. The Bar keeps Hardy isolated as they hit the Bar lariat. Sheamus drops a knee, cover, TWO, so back to a chinlock. Fans rally again, and Hardy fights out with a jawbreaker. Sheamus tags Cesaro, Cesaro whips Hardy and hits a running EuroUpper. He gut wrenches Hardy, covers, TWO. Cesaro chokes Hardy against the ropes, then Sheamus gets in a cheap shot, cover, TWO. The Bar grows a bit frustrated, but they know they’re in control. They embrace the heat before Cesaro gives Bray a cheap shot. Hardy rolls Cesaro up, TWO, and Cesaro tags in Sheamus.

EuroUppers and then the backbreakker elbow drop! Sheamus covers, TWO! He trash talks but Hardy fights back with body shots. Sheamus gives some of his own, but still gets the Side Effect! Hardy and Sheamus are down but crawling for their corners. Hot tags to Cesaro and Bray! The Eater of Worlds rallies on Cesaro, then even Sheamus. He runs corner to corner for a big corner splash, then again for the body check! Bray covers, TWO! Bray laughs as he drags Cesaro up. He prepares but Sheamus goes after him. Sheamus hits Hardy, too, and Cesaro covers, TWO. Cesaro tags Sheamus and they hit the A-Swiss-ted White Noise!

Cover, Hardy breaks it just in time! Cesaro goes after him but Hardy reverses into the Twist of Fate! Sheamus throws Hardy out, then takes aim at Bray. Sheamus calls for it, hammering his chest. But Bray spider-walks and that stops Sheamus. Hardy distracts, then Bray dodges the Brogue, to then hit Sister Abigail!

But that isn’t all, he goes to the corner for a Woken Spider-Walk. Hardy tags in, and together with Bray, gives Sheamus the floating Twist of Fate!

Cover, Hardy & Wyatt win!

Winners: Hardy & Wyatt, Hardy pinning; NEW Raw Tag Team Champions

The Expedition of Gold is a success! This yin-yang of madness grab gold together, rendering The Bar OBSOLETE on Raw! Will they continue to DELETE the tag teams of the Red Brand?

 

WWE United States Championship: Jeff Hardy VS Jinder Mahal w/ Sunil Singh!

The Modern Day Maharaja won the United States Championship in a Wrestlemania Fatal 4 Way. But then he lost the title his very first day on Raw! And to complicate things, the Charismatic Enigma was then sent to SmackDown! Which superstar and which brand will have this historic title once this is all over?

The bell rings and we begin. Hardy rallies the fans but Mahal kicks him low. Mahal clubs away but Hardy jawbreakers back. Hardy runs and dropkicks Mahal out of the ring, then drops Mahal with a swinging dropkick. Hardy slips out of the ring, and walks the barriers, to jump at Mahal! He wipes Mahal out but it was a bit double-edged. He drags Mahal up and into the ring, but Sunil grabs at Hardy’s legs. Hardy kicks Sunil away but Mahal pounces on Hardy. Mahal gives Hardy a clubbing crossface punch, then drops springboard knees on Hardy again and again. Sunil praises Mahal, but he’s the only one. Mahal stomps Hardy, then whips him corner to corner. Hardy hits buckles hard, but Mahal drags him back up for a neckbreaker. Mahal drops another knee then covers, TWO.

Mahal clubs Hardy more before putting him in a half nelson. Fans rally for Hardy and Hardy fights out, but Mahal throws him down. Mahal drags Hardy up into a chinlock, then an armlock, but fans chant for Hardy. Hardy stands up and fights back, but Mahal denies the Twist, double clotheslines take both men out! Mahal rolls to ropes while Hardy stirs. The two stand, Hardy blocks punches to give punches. He kicks but Mahal dodges, fireman’s carry for a gutbuster– No, Hardy blocks to hit his leg-splitting leg drop! Hardy dropkicks then covers, TWO. Hardy keeps his cool while Mahal rolls away. Fans rally while Hardy stands up again. He kicks but Mahal again denies the twist. Hardy boots and drives Mahal down, then climbs up, but misses most of the Whisper in the Wind. Cover, TWO!

The two stir, and Hardy ax handles Mahal down. Hardy whips but Mahal reverses, yet Hardy kicks Mahal away. Hardy then hits the swinging dropkick in the corner, and drags Mahal into position. He takes off the shirt, but Sunil distracts on the apron. Sunil gets knocked off the apron for it, but Mahal grabs Hardy from behind! Mahal wants his finish, but Hardy victory roll counters, only for Mahal to sit on the counter! TWO! Hardy kicks Mahal, Twist of Fate stunner! Then he climbs up, for the Swanton Bomb!

Cover, Hardy wins!

Winner: Hardy, by pinfall; still WWE United States Champion

Not only does Hardy win, but so does SmackDown! They both still have the US Championship. Mahal will have to turn elsewhere for gold now. Hardy has the title, but who on SmackDown will step up to challenge him next?

 

WWE takes a moment to thank and honor the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia for hosting the event.

It is the dawning of a new age for this nation, and a large part of that is thanks to the crown prince, Mohammad bin Salman, who is allowing his people to make decisions for themselves to be the best they can be for themselves, the country and the world. With that, the people of Arabia have both integrated much of the modern world while maintaining their heritage. This event with WWE proves the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia is willing to open themselves up to the rest of the world, here’s to more progress being made in the future.

 

Backstage interview with Chris Jericho.

Y2J returns to be part of the 50-Man Royal Rumble match, is tonight going to be another historic night with Jericho winning his first Rumble ever? Jericho’s first, the biggest one yet, Jericho loves being back in WWE. All these amazing competitors, from Hall of Famers to living legends and even that “stupid idiot” Kevin Owens. Jericho would love revenge on Kevin most of all. But with a field of 50 of the greatest ever, Jericho could make this moment his, Tom. No, this is Mike. Stop playing around, Tom, Jericho knows who you are. But since you’ve gone and done this, “YOU JUST MADE THE LIST!!” Jericho also puts the cameraman and the sound guy and whoever else is around, they’re on the list. Will Jericho put all 49 other superstars in the #GRR match on his List?

 

SmackDown Tag Team Championships: The Bludgeon Brothers VS The Usos!

The Uso Penitentiary used to have the tag team division on #Lockdown, but Harper & Rowan have shown there are weak points. Can Jimmy & Jey get things back under control against the chaotic and destructive duo?

Jey and Rowan start with the bell, and Jey throws hands! Rowan pushes Jey but Jey runs, only to run into a dropkick! Jey rolls to ropes but Rowan is on him with a knee drop. Tag to Harper, and Rowan holds Jey for Harper to mug him. Harper keeps on Jey in the corner, then tags Rowan back in. Rowan stomps Jey then drops another knee, grinding Jey into the mat. Rowan drags Jey up, for a pumphandle backbreaker, then a big splash! Cover, TWO, but Rowan keeps on Jey by hooking the nose and squeezing the head. Jey endures the vice of fists, and the fans rally for the Usos. Jey hits back but Rowan shoves him to then clobber him with a shoulder.

Rowan clubs Jey in the chest, then runs in but Jey evades! Harper tags in as Rowan hits the post, but Jey dodges him, too! Harper tumbles out of the ring, Jey crawls for his corner. Jimmy rallies the fans, hot tag to Jimmy! Jimmy aims at Harper and FLIES!

He keeps going, and FLIES on Rowan! Harper returns, Jimmy kicks him away. Jimmy kicks Rowan away, too, then climbs up top. Jimmy leaps at Harper for the crossbody, ONE! He dodges the discus and hits the dragon whip, Harper ends up in a corner. Jimmy rallies the fans, then runs in, hitting the hip attack! Jimmy runs but Harper catches him with a back elbow. Harper lifts Jimmy but Jimmy slips out to tag in Jey! The Usos evade Harper, then give him double boots. Harper is dazed, the Usos give him more double boots! Jimmy tags back in, double SUPERKICKS for Harper! Rowan returns, he gets double SUPERKICKS that send him out of the ring! Jey goes to a corner and climbs up, Uso Splash!

Cover, TWO! Harper shakes his head, he’s not losing to that. Jimmy tags in and climbs up on one corner while Jey takes another. But Rowan returns to pull Jey down and wreck him with a spinning heel kick! Harper shoves Jimmy down, and Rowan comes around to run him over! Rowan feeds Jimmy to Harper, then tags in. Harper slaps Rowan to fire him up, then whips Rowan into Jimmy for the corner splash. They work together, full nelson powerbomb!

Cover, Bludgeon Brothers win!

Winners: The Bludgeon Brothers (Harper & Rowan), Rowan pinning; still SmackDown Tag Team Champions.

The Uso Penitentiary could not contain the cruelty, and Harper & Rowan still reign. Can any team hope to ever stop the tag team Armageddon these two bring?

 

WWE Intercontinental Championship Fatal 4 Way Ladder Match: Seth Rollins VS Finn Balor VS The Miz VS Samoa Joe!

The Architect hit the Grand Slam back at Wrestlemania when he won the one title he had yet to hold. It also denied The A-Lister a historic record, but he vows to again make the title AWESOME. Meanwhile, the Extraordinary Man and Samoan Destroyer both want to add the IC title to their collection. Two superstars from each brand, which brand will hold this title by the end?

The bell rings, and all four men stare each other down while glancing up at the belt. They close in and then pair off into brawls. Rollins fires off on Joe while Finn goes after Miz, but then Joe and Miz turn things around on them. Miz whips but Finn reverses, Finn rolls through to hit Miz with a dropkick. Finn chops Joe then whips but Joe reverses. Joe runs in and hits the back elbow and Pele! Joe stomps Finn, then goes back to Rollins, but Rollins boots Joe away. Rollins also boots Miz away, then hops up, to hit a two-for-one Blockbuster!

Joe and Miz roll out while Rollins stalks Finn. Rollins swings Finn out but Finn elbows the knee away. Finn ducks to get around Rollins, but Rollins knees the slam away. Finn chops but Rollins Peles, sending him out of the ring. Rollins builds speed to DIVE on Finn!

They end up against the Arabian announce desk! But Rollins keeps moving, and DIVES on Miz! Then Rollins searches under the ring, and finds a ladder. Joe grabs the ladder and then so does Miz. Miz and Rollins work together to shove the ladder into Joe and Joe into the apron’s edge! And again as Finn returns in the ring. Finn sees them all grouped together, and decides to FLY!

Finn takes out Rollins and Miz, then goes after Joe, but Joe uses the ladder as a battering ram! Joe takes the ladder and puts it in the ring. Miz pursues at a crawl and grabs the ladder, but Joe shoves him away with it. Joe stands the ladder up, all alone, but then Rollins comes in and attacks. Rollins chops and forearms Joe, then runs, but into a drop toehold that drops him on the ladder. Finn returns, Joe goes after him first with a chop. Joe drags Finn up for a headbutt, then drags him up again to put him in a corner. Joe rams his knee into Finn, then brings Finn over. Finn trips up Joe, who lands on the ladder, then Finn double stomps Joe into it! Joe rolls out of the ring while Finn and the fans fire up.

Finn stands the ladder up now, and begins a climb. Miz returns to yank Finn down, for a boot! Now Miz climbs, but Rollins returns. Rollins yanks Miz off, Miz goes for the Finale, but Rollins shoves him into the ladder face first. The ladder falls over, then Rollins clotheslines Miz out of the ring. Rollins takes the ladder and stands it back up. He climbs now, but Finn returns to yank him off. Finn climbs, but Rollins yanks him down. Rollins climbs, but Finn climbs from the other end. Finn punches at Rollins, Rollins punches back, but Miz and Joe return to tip the ladder over! Both Raw superstars go down, but now the SmackDown superstars are alone. Miz pleads, saying they should work together. Joe shakes his hand, but reels him into a headbutt.

Joe stands the ladder up in a corner, but it falls over. No big deal, Joe just scoop slams Finn onto it! Then he pushes Finn away to stand the ladder up again. Joe drags Rollins over and throws Rollins into the ladder. Joe takes the ladder again, and rams Miz back out of the ring. He stands the ladder back up in another corner, then goes back to Finn. Joe brings Finn up, then throws him, but Finn slides to a stop to Slingblade Joe in return. Finn dropkicks Joe into the ladder, and the ladder falls on Joe!

Finn positions things, then climbs up. He takes aim, but Rollins climbs up. Finn resists the superplex while Joe gets himself and the ladder clear. Miz returns to add on in the corner, but Joe uses the ladder to scrape Miz off. Joe joins Rollins and Finn, for the Tower of Doom!

Down go Rollins and Finn, and Joe smirks as he rests in the corner. Fans are loving this as Joe gets back on track. He brings a new ladder out and puts it in the ring. Miz clobbers Joe from behind, then gives him a Skull-Crushing Finale to the ladder!

Joe rolls out of the ring, and Miz finds himself alone. Miz stands that ladder up, and climbs towards history. But Rollins returns to scramble up and stop him! Rollins punches Miz then reaches, but Miz hits him back. Miz bounces Rollins’ face off the ladder then tosses him down, but Finn returns! Finn stops Miz now, and now they brawl. They go back and forth, punching while pawing for the title. Finn fires off enough to knock Miz down, but Miz yanks Finn off, A-Lister combination! Rollins climbs up but Miz tips the ladder over again. Miz kicks Rollins low and hits the low DDT!

Fans rally while Miz picks the ladder up. He rams Rollins’ ribs with it, then Finn in the face! Miz then gets Finn again, and Rollins a second time. Rollins flies off to the announce desk while Miz goes at Finn. Finn kicks Miz back and Miz falls onto the ladder. Finn climbs up again, COUP DE GRACE with the ladder!

Miz is crushed and rolls out of the ring. Finn is alone, he stands up the ladder. Joe returns and yanks Finn off. They brawl, Joe roaring elbows but Finn Peles! Fans are all fired up as Finn climbs up again. But Joe yanks him down once more, for the Coquina Clutch! But Finn slips through to double stomp! Finn wills himself up the ladder, fans rallying behind him. But Joe is back up, and gets Finn on his shoulders. Finn punches Joe in the head, and slips off the back, but runs into Joe’s yurinagi! Joe teeters but makes his way to the ladder. He begins to climb, but Finn revives to tip it over! Now Joe gets a hotshot! Finn stands the ladder up while Joe rolls away. Finn climbs, but Rollins returns with a springboard!

Rollins cuts the line and grabs the belt before Finn, to take it down! Rollins wins!!

Winner: Seth Rollins; still WWE Intercontinental Champion

And Finn cannot believe it! He was inches away, yet Rollins literally jumps into the gap. Rollins snags that belt away from Finn and maintains his first reign as IC Champion. With resolve and cunning like that, will anyone take that belt away from The Architect?

 

WWE welcomes the stand-outs of their Saudi Arabia tryouts.

Please welcome four prospects that impreessed the most: Nassar, Hussein, Monsoour and Jedda’s own, Fisal. These four went through a week of what it’s like to train at the Performance Center. It was never expected to have WWE in Arabia, so to have four future Saudi superstars is a dream come true. Years ago, they were all just kids with a dream. But today, they live that dream! They all hope to represent their country as the first superstars from the Kingdom of Arabia. But wait, the Daivari BROTHERS appear!?

Yes, both Ariya and his older brother, Shawn Daivari, are here in Arabia, but proudly waving the flag of Iran. Shawn returns from being away, but now he and his brother are together to ruin Arabia’s moment. Ariya takes the mic while fans boo and jeer this disrespect. Shawn tells the fans to silence themselves while Ariya insults the four superstar prospects. They’re “pathetic, nothing” wannabes! The Daivari Brothers come from the strongest nation of all, Iran! Shawn speaks in Farsi to insult them all over again.

But when Monsoour stands up to the Daivaris, the fans fire up. Ariya shoves Monsoour, but Monsoour shoves him back! Then Fisal hits Shawn with a swift roundhouse! Shawn staggers to his feet, Nassar picks him up and carries him around. Arabia cheers their countrymen on as Nassar slams Shawn down! That’s not all, because Hussein then brings Shawn up for the big ejection. Arabia’s prospects run off Iran’s superstars and soak in the applause. Which of these four, or maybe all four, will become future WWE superstars?

 

WWE Championship: AJ Styles VS Shinsuke Nakamura!

The Phenomenal One and the King of Strong Style had their Dream (Re)Match at Wrestlemania. The champion retained, but the challenge changed, in terms of attitude. Nakamura has since disrespected and tormented Styles at every turn. Will Styles get revenge? Or will Nakamura take that title from him?

The bell rings and they circle. Both men are way of the other. Styles gets the waistlock but Nakamura reverses to an arm wrench. Nakamura yanks on Styles’ arm again and again, then wrenches the wrist. Styles rolls to reverse the hold onto Nakamura. Nakamura rolls and kicks Styles away to then exit the ring. Nakamura takes a moment to refocus, then reenters the ring. He and Styles circle again, tie up, Styles puts on the headlock. Nakamura tries but fails to power out of the hold. He puts Styles against the ropes, the referee calls for the break. Nakamura flicks Styles’ hair on the break, so Styles goes right after Nakamura again. They end up in a corner then out again, the referee calls for another break. Nakamura rests on the abs like he always does, then dares Styles to “C’mon!”

Styles runs into the knee and Nakamura clubs away. Nakamura runs and things speed up, Styles dropkicks Nakamura down! Styles drags Nakamura up and puts him in a corner. He chops Nakamura, then snapmares to kick him in the back. Cover, TWO, but Styles keeps his focus. He brings Nakamura up and whips him into a corner. Nakamura boots him away, then ducks the clothesline. They end up at the ropes again, but Nakamura kicks out the knee! Styles collapses but Nakamura is on him with spiteful stomps. Nakamura then slips to the outside with Styles across the apron, for a running knee! Nakamura keeps going, falling knee drop! He puts Styles back in the ring, covers, TWO. He tries again, ONE.

Nakamura drags Styles up and puts him in a corner for knees, then the Good Vibrations. He drags Styles and snapmares for the knee drop, cover, TWO. Nakamura keeps on Styles with a chinlock. Styles endures while fans rally. Styles stands up and fights back, but Nakamura knees him low. Nakamura throws with the inverted exploder, but Styles lands on his feet! Styles lifts Nakamura for the wheelbarrow facebuster! Both men are down while the fans rally again. Styles stirs and clobbers Nakamura with clotheslines. He snapmares then hits the sliding forearm! Nakamura gets to a corner while Styles kip-up. Styles hits a corner clothesline, but Nakamura slips off the fireman’s carry. Nakamura goes for a sleeper but Styles lifts him and this time gets the Ushigoroshi!

Cover, TWO! Both men are down again, but the fans keep cheering. Styles brings Nakamura up but Nakamura gets away from the Clash and to the ropes. Styles clubs Nakamura, then whips, but Nakamura counters with a knee. Nakamura swings one kick but hits the second! They’re both down again while fans rally again. Nakamura rams knees into Styles’ shoulders, then drags Styles up for a gord buster. Nakamura takes aim from a corner, firing himself up. Styles crawls then staggers up, but counters the Kinshasa to a schoolboy, TWO! Nakamura rushes Styles at the ropes, but runs into the Calf Crusher!

Styles has Nakamura in the middle of the ring! Nakamura endures, biting his fingers to focus on something else. He drags himself to ropes while fans rally. Styles rolls him around, but Nakamura still gets the break. Styles lets go, but he grows frustrated with Nakamura. He grabs that leg again but Nakamura enziguris with the other! Styles staggers, Nakamura stands up and runs in, but into Styles’ boots. Styles springboards but Nakamura catches him to set him up top, for the Top Shelf Knee! Cover, TWO.

Nakamura works to get feeling in that bad leg while the fans declare “This is Awesome!” Nakamura hoists Styles up to the top, then rocks Styles with a roundhouse. He climbs up to join Styles, but Styles resists. Styles slips out and under, to trip up Nakamura. Nakamura hits buckles and clutches his face from the impact .Both men are down but the fans rally again. They both stir and stand up. Nakamura throws a forearm, Styles fires back. It’s a brawl as they go back and forth. The fans are on Styles’ side as he and Nakamura keep going.

Styles gets the edge, Nakamura falls to a knee as he clutches his face again. But then he fires back with a strike fest! Styles ducks the kicks to give his Phenomenal Blitz, but Nakamura ducks the back hand to bring Styles into a cross armbreaker! Styles clasps his hands as Nakamura pulls. Nakamura breaks those hands apart and extends, but Styles rolls it to a cover! TWO! PELE! Nakamura staggers around before falling. Styles and Nakamura are both down again but stirring. Nakamura gets to a corner while Styles stands. Styles runs in but is put on the apron. He hits Nakamura with one forearm, then prepares the Phenomenal. Styles springboards but Nakamura ducks under, that forearm almost hits the ref! And in this distraction, Nakamura gives the low blow uppercut!

Cover, ROPEBREAK! Nakamura is furious that he hasn’t finished Styles through his cheating. He stands up and decides to use a real finisher. Nakamura fires up as he takes aim. Nakamura runs, but into a leaping forearm from Styles! Styles can’t cover, so Nakamura makes an escape to the outside. Styles crawls his way out and runs at Nakamura, and spears him over the Arabian announce desk! He won’t let up, even as the ring count reaches 7. He throws Nakamura into the barriers, the count reaches ten!

Double Count Out draw; Styles retains the WWE Championship

But the result means nothing to Styles, he keeps going after Nakamura with right hands. Styles backs off, but then runs back in, for a big tackle! It bends Nakamura backwards as they both fall into the timekeeper’s area!

The champion stands up and SMACKS Nakamura with a chair. Styles drags Nakamura up and into the ring, he wants to finish this. But Nakamura bails out of the ring to avoid the forearm. That doesn’t change anything for Styles, he takes Nakamura out with a slingshot forearm!

The Phenomenal One still has his title, but is this enough to finish his feud with the Con Artist?

 

Casket Match: The Undertaker VS Rusev w/ Aiden English!

The Deadman still lives. His return happened at Wrestlemania, and may be thanks in part to the goadings of John Cena. Now, Taker looks to continue his comeback by bringing back a match he invented! Will the Bulgarian Lion be buried in Saudi Arabia?

Aiden English helps with Rusev’s entrance, saying that this will be Taker’s final day, “locked in the casket and buried away~”, then they will celebrate on… RUSEV DAY~!

Fans are already excited for this match as they chant for Undertaker. The bell rings, and Taker glances over at the casket as it opens. Rusev bails out of the ring, but English helps him keep focus. Taker waits while fans duel between “Undertaker!” and “Rusev Day!” Rusev returns and circles with Taker, only to slip back out. But Taker pursues! Taker throws hands on Rusev then puts him in the ring. Rusev stomps Taker as he returns, then gives body shots in a corner. Rusev stomps Taker more, then roars, but Taker grabs Rusev to put him in the corner. Taker gives Rusev his body shots and haymakers. Taker wrenches Rusev’s arm then yanks on it. He rams shoulder into shoulder, then wrenches Rusev’s arm again. Taker climbs up, and fans know what’s coming: Old School!

Rusev goes down from the clubbing forearm, but Taker picks him up and throws him at the casket. Rusev freaks out from even being in contact with it! He and English regroup and English calms Rusev down. Rusev drags Taker out of the ring and throws haymakers. Taker staggers and Rusev rams him into barriers. Rusev whips but Taker reverses and sends Rusev into barriers. Taker drags Rusev up and brings him around to the announce desk to bounce Rusev’s face off the cover. They go back to the ring, and Taker positions Rusev on the apron. Taker climbs up onto the apron, and drops the guillotine leg drop!

Rusev is dazed as Taker rolls him into the ring. Taker calls for the lid, and starts rolling Rusev over. Rusev is inside, but English won’t allow the lid to shut! Taker chases English away, but Rusev escapes the casket in this time. Taker goes back into the ring, but Rusev catches him with a roundhouse! Rusev stomps Taker, then throws in forearms. Fans duel while English cheers Rusev on. Rusev keeps throwing punches, but Taker throws some back. They go back and forth with heavy haymakers. Rusev gets an edge, but Taker hits back harder! Taker drags Rusev up again, for a headbutt. Rusev staggers but Taker whips him. Rusev reverses and hits Taker with the leaping heel kick! Taker goes down and Rusev catches his breath.

Rusev keeps going, dropping elbow after elbow. He roars while fans jeer. Rusev shouts “MACHKA!” as he stomps Taker once more. Rusev puts Taker in the Accolade! English reminds Rusev, go for the casket. Rusev leaves Taker down on the mat while he calls for the lid. But Taker sits up!

Taker stands up and Rusev feels the dread come over him. Taker grabs Rusev, but Rusev slips out of the choke slam. They brawl again, back and forth. Rusev gets the edge again, then whips, but Taker counters with the CHOKE SLAM! Taker then drags Rusev over, the casket’s lid still open, and tosses him in. But then English goes after Taker! Only to get a CHOKE SLAM! Taker won’t leave it at that, he brings English up, for the Tombstone!

Taker puts English in the casket with Rusev, and closes the lid! The Undertaker wins!

Winner: The Undertaker

The Phenom rains on Rusev Day’s parade, and is back in rare form. Is this only the beginning of a new chapter for the Deadman?

 

WWE Universal Championship Steel Cage Match: Brock Lesnar VS Roman Reigns!

The Beast continues to dominate anyone and everyone put before him in the ring. However, The Big Dog has proven to be the most difficult to put away. It took FIVE F5’s to do it at Wrestlemania, in just the second 1v1 match Roman has had against the “reigning, defending, undisputed” champion. Will the third time be the charm? Or is The Beast too at-home inside of a steel cage?

The cage door is closed and the bell rings. Roman and Lesnar circle inside the steel, staring down. Roman rushes Lesnar, but Lesnar gets him with a German Suplex! Suplex City already begins as Lesnar throws Roman again. Lesnar stalks Roman, and already gets his third German Suplex. The fans chant “Suplex City!” while Lesnar stalks Roman again. He grabs Roman and throws him for a fourth German. Roman is gasping and coughing, his body sore all over again. Lesnar drags him up, fireman’s carry, and throws Roman for the first F5 of this match!

But Lesnar doesn’t cover, he both remembers Roman’s resiliency, and wants to punish Roman for being so resilient. He looms over Roman, grinning and laughing. The fans rally but Lesnar picks Roman up again. Another fireman’s carry, but Roman slips out to SUPERMAN Punch! And another! Then a third! Lesnar is reeling while Roman is aiming. Roman howls, then runs in, but the Spear is caught! Roman grabs the cage to prevent a second F5, then kicks Lesnar away so he can climb! Lesnar hurries up and after Roman, not letting him win by escape. Roman punches Lesnar but still gets brought back in. They’re both on the top rope, Lesnar elbows Roman and Roman falls to the mat.

Lesnar positions himself, he climbs up the cage! It’s not easy for him, but Roman makes it worse by catching up to him. Roman grabs the legs and pulls Lesnar back in. Roman clubs away, then gives Lesnar a powerbomb! Lesnar crawls away while Roman regains his breath. Heyman grows worried for his Beast, but Samoa Joe is watching backstage. Joe has told Roman that whether or not The Big Dog is a champion, Joe wants to destroy what’s left of him at Backlash. Roman walks over to Lesnar and throws him into the cage. Then he does it again! Roman drags Lesnar up a third time for a third throw into the walls. He then backs off and SPEARS Lesnar! But he knows that won’t be enough, he shouts for Lesnar to stand up again. He SPEARS Lesnar again!

Lesnar is down but Roman knows this won’t finish it. He builds up lots of speed, for a THIRD Spear! Both men are down, but Roman covers, TWO! Roman can’t believe it, but Lesnar survives. Roman calls for the door to open, he wants out. Lesnar crawls after Roman, but it’s Heyman who stops Roman’s escape by swinging the door on him! Lesnar lifts Roman, for the second F5! Cover, TWO! Lesnar is shocked, he thought he and his Advocate had finished this. Speaking of, Heyman throws a chair into the cage! There’s no disqaulifications, so anything goes. Lesnar grabs the chair, and takes off the gloves. Lesnar goes over to Roman but Roman SPEARS him again! Cover, TWO!!

But Roman sees the chair now. Heyman’s help is about to bite him in the ass, because Roman is grinning as he SMACKS Lesnar! And SMACK, and SMACK, and SMACK! Roman watches Lesnar writhe, then reloads the fist, for a fourth SUPERMAN PUNCH! Lesnar still moves, so Roman lets out another howl. He runs in, and SPEARS Lesnar, through the cage!!

Both men hit the floor, but who hit the ground first?! The decision is announced: “And still WWE Universal Champion, Brock Lesnar!”

Winner: Brock Lesnar, by escape; still WWE Universal Champion

It was a photo finish, but somehow the Beast gets away with the title. However, a crash landing like that, neither man is in much shape to acknowledge the finish. There is controversy, as well, as the escape rule is about whose feet touch first, and with the help of instant replay, it is clear one of Roman’s feet touch something other than cage chain-link first. Will Lesnar continue to survive Roman’s challenges? Will Roman ever get that title from Lesnar?

 

50-Man Royal Rumble match!

This is the first time in this match type’s illustrious history that the over-the-top-rope gauntlet style battle royal has been THIS massive! Fifty men, all sent out one at a time, until there is only one left in the ring. How long will it last? Who will last the longest? And who will be the winner of the Greatest Royal Rumble trophy and championship?

As always, two men start this match 1v1. The man who draw unlucky Number One is… Daniel Bryan! The leader of the #YesMovement starts off this historic match!

And he goes up against… Dolph Ziggler! The Show-Off also walks the toughest path with Bryan, as these two must both get through all 49 other entrants, which includes the other.

The bell rings and history begins! Bryan and Ziggler circle, both very skilled in technical mat wrestling. They both try to get control of the other while going for an early elimination, but neither man can get the other out. Ziggler puts Bryan in a corner and throws hands, then throws Bryan at the other end. Bryan holds on and fights back. Bryan runs but into Ziggler’s dropkick! Ziggler pounces, but Bryan still holds onto ropes. Bryan tries to bring Ziggler out with him, but Ziggler slips away as the countdown begins. Ziggler and Bryan are joined by Number 3: Sin Cara!

SmackDown’s lone luchador runs into the ring, ducks Ziggler and Bryan to hit a double quebrada! Sin Cara rolls and powerbombs Ziggler! He kicks Bryan’s legs then whips, but Bryan reverses. Cara dodges and springboards for a crossbody. He dropkicks Bryan into a corner but Bryan puts him on the apron. Cara kicks back and climbs up, for a swanton bomb! He drags Bryan up but Bryan clutches the ropes. ZIggler goes to superkick but misses, Cara uses strength to bend Ziggler in a torture rack. Cara lets Ziggler down, but Ziggler elbows him back. Cara bukcs off the Zig-Zag but runs into a SUPERKICK! Ziggler clotheslines Cara out, and ELIMINATES him!

But then Bryan goes after Ziggler from behind! The countdown returns and Number Four: Curt Axel! The Son of Mr. Perfect is here, making a start away from The Miz. Bryan and Ziggler brawl but Axel comes in to club away. He bumps Bryan off buckles then stomps a mudhole in him. Axel goes after Ziggler, Ziggler fights back, but Axel reverses the whip. Ziggler boots but Axel turns him around to crossface punch away on him! Axel runs side to side for a clothesline that brings Ziggler down. The countdown brings us Number Five: MARK HENRY! The WWE Hall of Famer and World’s Strongest Man gives one last match of historic proportions!

Henry heads down while Bryan fights off Axel. Axel has Bryan hanging upside down in a tree of woe, then goes after Henry. Henry lifts Axel up with ease, and puts him on the apron. Axel keeps fighting, but a headbutt sends him down, Henry ELIMINATES Axel. But then Ziggler and Bryan work together on Henry! Henry’s too big and strong, though, he fights them off. Number Six appears, it’s Mike Kanellis! “The Lover and a Fighter”, he’s back from helping wife Maria with their new baby girl. However, Henry is ready for him, and with one clothesline, he ELIMINATES Kanellis!

But Bryan gets right on Henry with a sleeper hold! Henry backs Bryan into a corner and rams in a shoulder. Henry whips Bryan corner to corner, but Ziggler goes after Henry. Now we get Number Seven, Hiroki Sumi! A sumo star from Japan makes a surprise appearance, and he stares Henry down. Sumi prepares himself per the ways of Sumo, but Henry isn’t having it. They push each other, but Henry gets Sumi to ropes. Henry dumps and ELIMINATES Sumi, but Bryan and Ziggler again work together, they ELIMINATE Henry! Now it’s just Numbers One and Two as the countdown begins again. Ziggler narrowly avoids elimination while we get Number Eight: The Ascension’s Viktor!

And he blazes down to the ring to chop away on Ziggler. He whips Ziggler and hits a leaping back elbow, then bumps Bryan before throwing Ziggler. Ziggler again avoids the floor while Bryan dodges Viktor. Viktor boots Bryan away, then hits a flying knee! Viktor goes after Ziggler with a back elbow in a corner, then scoops Bryan. He brings Bryan to the ropes, but Bryan stays on the apron and grabs Viktor’s arm for a shoulder breaker. Bryan drags Viktor up and over, and ELIMINATES Viktor! Ziggler and Bryan brawl again while we get Number Nine: The New Day’s Kofi Kingston! The living highlight reel of Rumble moments hits the ring and hits both Ziggler and Bryan with clotheslines!

Kofi is all fired up, he gives Ziggler the Boom Drop! Then Kofi rushes Bryan but Bryan dodges. Kofi stays in and goes to throw Bryan out. Bryan holds on again, then kicks Kofi in the chest. Bryan kicks him and Ziggler while the countdown brings Number Ten: Tony Nese! The Premier Athlete may have lost the Cruiserweight Gauntlet on 205 Live but he’s looking to make an even bigger splash in a Rumble debut. Nese runs in and catches Kofi with an elbow. He goes Matrix to mule kick, knee lift and sweep the legs. Nese is all fired up, and goes to throw Kofi out, but can’t. Bryan knocks Nese down with EuroUppers, and Kofi goes after Ziggler, while we get Number 11: The Revival’s Dash Wilder! One of the #TopGuys in tag team wrestling goes after Nese but then Bryan goes after him!

Neither man goes out, so Bryan gives Kofi a stiff EuroUpper. Dash throws Nese down but Bryan on him. Dash forearms Bryan and whips to rock him with a big back elbow. He puts Bryan in a corner and throws more hands. Kofi tries to get Ziggler out but can’t, and Nese is upon him instead. Another countdown, and we get Number 12: Hornswoggle?! The leprechaun is back and the fans go wild! He helps ELIMINATE Dash! Then he gets in the ring, and says hi to Kofi. Only to kick Kofi in the shin! And fireman’s carry Kofi for an Irish Drop! Hornswoggle climbs up high, but Ziggler SUPERKICKS him down!

Nese sees the little leprechaun, but Hornswoggle hits him back. Ziggler goes after him, but Hornswoggle bites Ziggler’s hands! Nese runs in and ELIMINATES Hornswoggle with the Premier Kneese! The four men continue brawling while we get Number 13: Primo Colon! The second generation Shining Star goes after Nese, but Nese reverses his whip. Primo slips on the springboard, then has a suplex tug-o-war with Nese. Bryan hits Kofi with a tornado DDT! Primo picks up Nese and throws him over, but Nese stays in. Ziggler brawls with Bryan again, but Bryan lifts him while we get Number 14: The New Day’s Xavier Woods!

Woods plays his trombone all the way down to the ring, then helps Kofi against Nese. The New Day hopes to win one way or another, but Primo goes after each of them. Primo puts Xavier on the apron, then throws Kofi up and over, but Kofi stays on Xavier’s back! Primo punches Kofi, he and Xavier both teeter! They hold on and hit Primo back. Fans applaud this combined effort from the New Day as they climb up top. The others gather, and Kofi uses Woods’ back as a springboard to FLY!

Kofi bowls over Bryan, Primo AND Ziggler. But Nese is up, clapping along? Nese shows off his dance moves, and the 76New Day picks him up to celebrate. Oh, and ELIMINATE him! Nese protests but now we get Number 15: the inspirational Bo Dallas! He throws Kofi but Kofi holds on. Bo clobbers Woods and drops a knee, then puts him in a corner to club away. Woods holds on but Kofi saves him. Bryan joins in and tries to suplex Kofi. Kofi tries to suplex him back, but it’s Bryan who suplexes Kofi over. Fans applaud and we get Number 16: KURT ANGLE!

The Olympic Gold Medalist makes his Rumble return, and is ready for Bo with a German Suplex! He throws Primo, he throws Ziggler, and then throws Bo out for the ELIMINATION! Angle ELIMINATES Primo, but Ziggler SUPERKICKS Angle! Ziggler mocks the straps down, but runs right into Angle’s belly2belly, Angle ELIMINATES Ziggler! The New Day go after Angle together now, but he fights them off. Bryan goes after Kofi while Angle keeps on Woods. Woods hits back, and Kofi tries to throw Bryan out, while we get Number 17: The Revival’s Scott Dawson! The other #TopGuy runs out and goes after Woods with haymakers and stomps. Dawson tries to throw Woods out, but Angle goes after him, too.

The New Day both work on Bryan, but Bryan holds on for dear life. They bring him back in to work over while we get Number 18: GOLDUST! The Bizarre One makes some history of his own by being in his 13th Rumble match. He gets Woods with a spinning powerslam, then throws him over. Woods holds on even as Goldust stomps away. Bryan pushes Kofi away and Goldust hits him one, Bryan hits a flying knee! But Goldust is on Bryan! He throws Bryan to the apron and throws haymakers. Bryan holds one and slides under while we get Number 19: The Ascension’s Konnor. Konnor goes after Kofi, but Woods saves Kofi. Konnor gose after Woods, but Kofi saves Woods.

Angle goes after Dawson while The New Day work together on Konnor. Goldust keeps on Bryan while Woods also goes after Angle. Angle blocks the takedown while we get Number 20: Elias! The Drifter is going international with an appearance in Jedda. He asks them, “Who Wants to Walk With Elias?!” Fans seem pretty eager to, because Saudi Arabia knows WWE really means “Walk With Elias!” Elias wants them to silence phones, hold applause and shut mouths while he plays. “Greatest Royal Rumble~!” And then he dumps out Konnor, Woods AND Kofi, TRIPLE ELIMINATION!!

Elias then goes after Bryan while we get Number 21: Luke Gallows! The Club’s Director of Chaos heads to the ring and goes after Dawson. Bryan and Angle brawl while Elias goes after Goldust. Angle throws Bryan with a German but Bryan lands on his knees, to hit the YES Kicks! Angle blocks the buzzsaw into the Ankle Lock! But Bryan slips out and shoves Angle away. Bryan misses in the corner and is thrown with the Angle Slam! Straps down, but Elias throws out and ELIMINATES Angle! But Gallows gets Elias and everyone else with a YAKUZA Kick while we get Number 22: Rhyno! The ManBeast of ECW and inaugural SmackDown Tag Team Champion goes right after Dawson while Goldust goes after Elias.

Gallows stomps and grinds Bryan in a corner. Gallow sits Bryan on the top rope but can’t finish him before we get Number 23: Drew Gulak! Another Cruiserweight contender, the Philly Fury goes right at Bryan! As the self-proclaimed best submission specialist in the WWE, he goes after another man known for his submissions. However, Dawson goes after Gulak, and the two scrap and chop with each other. Rhyno goes after Bryan while Gallows clubs Goldust. The countdown brings Number 24: Tucker Knight! NXT is represented now as one half of Heavy Machinery hits the ring. He brawls with Dawson, endless haymakers and stomps sit Dawson down. Tucker clubs Elias, then suplexes Gulak! But Gulak reverses into a sleeper! Tucker throws Gulak over the top rope and ELIMINATES him!

Gallows uppercuts Tucker while we get Number 25: Bobby Roode! Mr. Halfway Point is GLORIOUS as the former United States Champion makes his Rumble debut. Roode hits Elias then clotheslines Tucker and gives Dawson a SPINEBUSTER. Elias goes after Roode but still gets the GLORIOUS Blockbuster. Goldust hits Roode with the uppercut, but then Roode puts him on the apron. With a dropkick, Roode ELIMINATES Goldust. Roode gives Dawson an atomic drop, then another, then catapults him at the corner. Dawson tumbles all the way out and is ELIMINATED!

The countdown brings Number 26: Fandango of the Fashion Police! He throws hands on Tucker, then chops. Roode and Elias go against each other while Rhyno helps Gallows against Fandango. Bryan and Elias work on Roode but Tucker goes after Elias! Elias survives while we get Number 27: Chad Gable! Gable wants to make a big impact as a singles wrestler, he chop blocks Elias and arm-drags Fandango. Tucker goes after Rhyno but Gable goes after Tucker! Gable has Tucker on his shoulders for an electric chair drop! Bryan fights off Roode to go after Gable with kicks and a suplex. We get Number 28: REY MYSTERIO!

The King of Lucha Libre and a former Rumble winner goes right after Gallows with kicks. Roode comes over, but that only helps Rey in the headscissors that ELIMINATES Gallows! Then Rey slingshots and sets Roode up for… No, no 619 as Fandango intercepts. Fandango lifts then tosses Rey to Gable, but Rey gives Gable a tornado DDT! The fans love Rey as he gives Tucker and Rhyno some shots. Elias goes after Rey while we get Number 29: Mojo Rawley! He runs to the ring, ready to use his Killer Instinct, and he quickly ELIMINATES Fandango with a clothesline. Mojo then goes after Gable with stomps and headbutts. Bryan brawls with Elias while Mojo and Rey work on Gable. Bryan hoists Elias up but Elias holds on. Elias saves himself while we get Number 30: Tyler Breeze!

Breeze gets in and goes after Mojo, but Mojo throws him out. Mojo swings on Breeze but Breeze leaps into the arms of Fandango! Fandango sets Breeze back on the apron, but Mojo just shoves him off and ELIMINATES him. All that teamwork for nothing. Tucker gives Gable a heavy Thesz Press, but then Bryan kicks away on him. Bryan passes 43 minutes as he and Gable suplex battle. Gable suplexes Bryan over! He and Bryan brawl more as Number 31 comes out: it’s The New Day’s Big E! He is the last chance for The New Day to become Greatest Royal Rumble champion, and he heads down as everyone brawls. Big E offers Tucker some pancakes! Tucker doesn’t want pancakes, he wants #SteaksAndWeights. Tucker rushes Big E, but ends up in the abdominal stretch.

Big E can’t hold Tucker, he’s too big, so he gives Tucker the Big Ending! Then he throws him out and ELIMINATES Tucker. Here’s some pancakes for the road. Big E goes after Roode while we get Number 32: Karl Anderson! The Club’s Machine Gun and Bryan brawl right away, Anderson gets the jump kick. Anderson avoids Roode’s spinebuster to give a spinebuster! Then Anderson rocks Big E, only for Big E to run him over. Big E throws Anderson but Anderson holds on. Bryan goes after Mojo while Rey drop toeholds Roode. 619 while we get Number 33: Apollo Crews! Titus Worldwide’s top star goes after Gable and hits him with an enziguri. Then the standing moonsault before he throws Gable out and ELIMINATES him.

Gable has a rough landing while Bryan goes after Apollo now. Apollo lifts Bryan but Bryan fights back. Elias has Rey on the ropes while Big E goes after Mojo. Bryan chops Apollo while we get Number 34: Roderick Strong! Another NXT star appears to #ShockTheSystem. Strong gives everyone chops, then reverses Elias’ whip to give him a dropkick. He gives familiar foe, Bobby Roode, a half-nelson backbreaker, then gives one to Anderson. Rey runs over, wheelbarrow, into the backbreaker! Strong even lifts Big E, for a fireman carry gutbuster! Rhyno goes after Strong but Strong throws him over, and ELIMINATES him with a knee strike! Strong goes after Rey but has to fight off Bryan while we get Number 35: Randy Orton!

The Viper has won two Rumbles before, can he make his third THE Greatest Rumble? He hits the ring and clobbers Mojo, then Apollo, then powerslams Anderson. Orton gets a back elbow from Apollo, and Apollo hops up to jump, but into an RKO! Anderson runs in but is thrown out for the ELIMINATION! Mojo runs but Orton throws him out for another ELIMINATION! Orton picks up the unconscious Apollo and throws him out for a third ELIMINATION. Fans fire up while Orton stomps on Rey. Orton remembers when Rey eliminated him way back in 2006, this is payback overdue. But now we get Number 36: Heath Slater! The One Man Band is doing this for his kids! Slater rallies with heel kicks and forearms, then goes after Elias.

Slater throws Elias to the apron but Elias holds on. Elias kicks Slater away and he returns into the rnig. Orton goes after Rey again while Bryan whips Roode. Roode kicks Bryan and Strong chops Big E while we get Number 37: Babatunde! Another NXT superstar, this massive Polish-Polynesian football pro clubs and tackles everyone that moves. Babatunde picks Roode up and clubs him in the chest, but Bryan doesn’t back down. Babatunde makes Bryan pay for that while we get Number 38: Baron Corbin! The Lone Wolf is an Andre the Giant Battle Royal winner, and he drags Elias out from under the ropes to throw him into steps! Corbin clubs Orton then rocks Strong and Roode. He boots Bryan and gives Rey the DEEP SIX!

Corbin clotheslines Roode but Strong boots and enziguris him back. Strong whips but Corbin slides out and in, to clobber Strong out of the sky! Roode wants his DDT but Corbin shoves him out for the ELIMINATION! Corbin then throws Strong out and ELIMINATES him! He goes after Babatunde while we get Number 39: Titus O’Neil! The Gator runs in but trips?! That historic crash and burn doesn’t stop him, he gets right up and into the ring. Titus clubs away on Bryan, then boots Slater and Big E and even Elias. Titus lifts Rey high over his head, but Rey fights back. Rey clubs Titus and Bryan adds kicks. Babatunde and Corbin brawl while Big E works on Slater. Bryan throws Orton but Orton survives, we get Number 40: Dan Matha!

Another big man from NXT, another former football player enters. He stomps Rey but Titus goes after him. Rey and Bryan work on Ortno, as does Slater. Matha puts Rey right into a corner, then whips him into buckles. Slater pushes Bryan but Bryan holds on while we get Number 41: BRAUN STROWMAN! The Monster Among Men is about to have everyone #GetTheseHands! Strowman stands in the ring and stares Babatunde down. To then throw him out and ELIMINATE him! Strowman grabs Matha and ELIMINATES him, too! Then Strowman rocks Bryan with an uppercut, and boots Elias right down. Big E lifts Strowman but Strowman fights out. Strowman throws and ELIMINATES Big E!

Slater boots Strowman but his crossbody is caught. Strowman throws Slater at Babatunder and Matha, they topple over and Slater is ELIMINATED. Strowman roars but everyone goes after him while we get Number 42: Tye Dillinger! The Perfect Ten appears at the perfect time if they want to get rid of Strowman. He helps out but that’s not enough, Strowman explodes out! Then he ELIMINATES Titus! Strowman grabs Tye, and ELIMINATES him with a toss. Strowman rocks Corbin, then scoops Rey. Orton lurks, dropkick! Rey dropkicks the legs out, then runs, for a 619! Then RKO! But Rey springboards and hits Orton with a seated senton! Only for Corbin to throw Rey out.

But Rey stays on the apron, and shoulders Corbin to then swing kick him. Rey slingshots but Corbin counters with a right hand, and ELIMINATES Rey! Corbin talks trash, but Corbin clotheslines and ELIMINATES him. But Elias ELIMINATES Orton! Only for Strowman to run him over and CHOKE SLAM him! Strowman stands tall while we get Number 43: Curt Hawkins! Hawkins wants to end his losing streak, but this is not where and who to do it. He chooses to NOT get in the ring, but Strowman slips out under the ropes and chases him down! Strowman drags Hawkins back to the ring, Hawkins begging for mercy the entire time.

They enter the ring, Strowman runs Bryan over just because, then boots Elias, too. Strowman enters the ring, returns to Hawkins, and ELIMINATES him. Strowman runs at Elias but Elias dodges, sending the monster into the post. Elias drags Strowman up and throws him back into the post. He stomps away on Strowman while we get Number 44: Bobby Lashley! Dominance personifed, Lashley makes his return to the Rumble. He dodges Elias and runs him over. Lashley scoops and slams Elias, whips him to the corner, then fires up. Elias dodges but not for long, and Lashley whips him again. Lashley runs in for a BIG shoulder tackle. Lashley calls for the suplex but Elias counters with a knee strike. Elias runs but Lashley jumps over him to then dump him down.

Lashley throws Elias out and ELIMINATES him. Now he and Strowman stand in the ring. They brawl with haymakers, Strowman corner splashes but Lashley returns it. Lashley runs but Bryan returns to fire off dropkicks to both big men! Bryan goes back and forth, back and forth, while we get Number 45: The Great Khali! The Punjabi Nightmare makes his own Rumble return while Lashley and Bryan struggle in one corner and Strowman rests in the other. Khali goes after Lashley and clubs him with one hand. He clubs Bryan, then Strowman. Khali grabs Bryan, but Strowman clubs Khali back. Strowman and Lashley work together and ELIMINATE Khali! Then they turn back to each other! Strowman whips Lashley but double clotheslines take each other out!

All three men remaining are down while we get Number 46: Kevin Owens! The Prizefighter has his job back thanks to Stephanie McMahon, and he’s going to take advantage of this situation. Cannonball for Strowman, one for Lashley, then back to Strowman. He goes after Bryan but Bryan kicks him and throws him to the apron. Bryan clubs away on Keivn but Kevin hotshots Bryan away. Bryan has now lasted the longest of any Rumble participant ever, but that doesn’t really matter when he’s hit with a Pop-Up Powerbomb! Kevin stomps on Strowman to keep him down, then picks Bryan up while we get Number 47: Shane McMahon!

Shane O’Mac and Kevin still have hard feelings towards each other, Kevin would love to ruin Shane’s Rumble debut. But Shane fires off fast and furious strikes, then a big running elbow. Shane throws fast hands, then gives Lashley some stomps. Kevin goes after Shane again with right hands, then throws Shane to ropes. Shane holds on and boots Kevin bakc, then baits Kevin into the DDT! Fans applaud for Shane dancing around, but then Shane and Bryan lock eyes. Former coworkers as commissioner and general manager, but that won’t stop them from working together now. They both give Kevin some YES Kicks! Or perhaps, YE$ kicks. Kevin takes kick after kick after kick, then Bryan works to throw him out. We get Number 48: Shelton Benjamin!

The Gold Standard is also back to being a singles competitor, he’d love to grab up the Greatest Royal Rumble Championship. He goes right after Shane with a takedown and fast hands! Then he runs Bryan right over with that shoulder. Shane hits back, but Benjamin hits the Dragon Whip. Benjamin gives Lashley the step-up knee, then tries for Strowman, but Strowman throws him down. The Monster Among Men stands up, so Kevin convinces everyone to go after Strowman together. They do, but Strowman shoves them away in turn while we get Number 49: Big Cass!

The Human Skyscraper has returned to bully Bryan, this is a sampling of what we’ll see at Backlash. Bryan is ready for Cass, and Cass slides in right as Strowman explodes out again. Even with others in his way, Cass manages to club Bryan down. He throws hands on Bryan while Lashley goes after Kevin. Strowman stands but Cass boots him. Benjamin adds the knee, then Lashley adds a shoulder! Shane climbs up from the opposite side, steadies himself, and hits Strowman with Coast2Coast!!

The Monster is down but falls out the bottom. Everyone else breaks off to pairs again, Cass making sure he has Bryan. Kevin interferes so Cass gives him a corner splash. Cass lifts Lashley and throws him with a Fall Away Slam. Benjamin dodges Cass while we get Number 50: Chris Jericho! And Kevin is afraid… Y2J has been meaning to get revenge on this “stupid idiot”, so now we’ll finally see it. Kevin is furious, shouting for jericho to go back to Japan. Jericho runs in and unloads right hands! He runs Kevin over, then Lionsaults! He triangle dropkicks Cass but Cass survives. Benjamin avoids elimination from Jericho, but not that Code Breaker! Then Jericho ELIMINATES Benjamin.

Kevin goes for the Pop-Up but Jericho slips out. He takes Kevin down, for the Walls of Jericho! This isn’t for eliminations but for payback. Kevin taps out but that doesn’t matter in Rumbles. Cass stands and boots Jericho! Lashley grabs Cass and lifts him up for the suplex. He drops Cass down with a brainbuster, but then Kevin SUPERKICKS him. Bryan back suplexes Kevin, then unloads more YES Kicks. Bryan wants Shane to get up to help. Kevin gets dropkicks from Bryan over and over, then Shane hits another– No, Strowman stops Shane to throw him to the announce desk!!

Needless to say, this ELIMINATES Shane. Strowman roars while Shane is barely moving in the wreckage. Bryan goes after Cass but Lashley goes after Bryan. Strowman finally returns to the ring, and he catches Lashley to ELIMINATE him! Jericho runs in, but Strowman throws and ELIMINATES him. Kevin tries, but Strowman ELIMINATES him! Bryan goes after Strowman, but Strowman powers him off. Bryan punches, but it does nothing to the Monster Among Men. Strowman lifts Bryan, but Bryan slips out and works on Strowman! Strowman saves himself, but a roundhouse rocks him!

Cass boots Bryan! He drags Bryan up and throws him out, and ELIMINATES Bryan! The historic streak ends, Cass talks trash about Bryan taking out trash. But Cass should remember who is still in there with him.

The final two men are the two biggest men. They brawl with big haymakers, but Cass’ clotheslines don’t send Strowman out. Cass gets a running start, but Strowman blocks to then hang Cass up on the top rope. Strowman tortures Cass’ crotch, then barrels him off! Strowman wins!!

Winner: Braun Strowman, as Number 41

The Greatest Royal Rumble, the longest Royal Rumble, the BIGGEST Royal Rumble, is won by the massive Monster Among Men!

Vince McMahon helps present the trophy to the winner.

Not only does Strowman get to pose with the truly titanic trophy made for this occasion, but he also receives the Greatest Royal Rumble title! The Monster Among Men is the inaugural champion of this amazing and historic event.

It is a massive celebration for both Saudi Arabia, the superstars of the WWE, and even members of the WWE Universe around the world.

 


 

My Thoughts:

This was actually a damn good event. I’m not going to go into politics or social issues, I’m keeping it strictly business. Almost every match on this card was really good, and I really enjoyed them. The one that wasn’t as good was Hardy VS Mahal, but only because of that obvious Whisper in the Wind botch. But I had figured Hardy would retain, and that was why Raw kept the Intercontinental Championship. I was surprised it was Rollins, and certainly in the way he won it. I’d never seen anyone snipe their opponent so suddenly in a Ladder Match the way Rollins did Finn. Rollins still has Miz at Backlash, but after that, I’d imagine it’ll be Rollins VS Finn for the title the rest of the way.

Almost every match went the way I expected, too. To my surprise, all the other champions retained, including Lesnar! That cage spot was great, but I really thought that was how Roman was going to win. Instead, it’s Lesnar who wins by the skin of his teeth, to continue his reign and climb up the list of longest reigns ever. I really hope they don’t try to make Lesnar into the New Era Bruno, because first and foremost, Lesnar is not as entertaining anymore. Aside from the cage usage, this Universal Championship match felt exactly like the Wrestlemania match. But oh well, such is life, Lesnar will probably keep that belt until he’s at least past CM Punk’s record reign. That 50-Man Rumble was really incredible, too. There was so much going on because it had the most entrants ever, and all hail Strowman, he is the greatest.

My Score: 8.5/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (3/18/24)

Talk about a Big Time Raw!

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Will The Man be the Last Woman Standing?

Becky Lynch and Nia Jax want to finally put this to an end, so tonight on Raw, it will be a Big Time Last Woman Standing match! Will the Irresistible Force force the WrestleMania 40 match to change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: #DIY VS The Creed Brothers; DIY wins and advances to WrestleMania.
  • Candice LeRae & Indi Hartwell VS Kayden Carter & Katana Chance; Candice & Indi win.
  • Dominik Mysterio w/ JD McDonagh VS Ricochet; Ricochet wins.
  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The Awesome Truth VS Indus Sher; The Awesome Truth wins and advances to WrestleMania.
  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The New Day VS The Alpha Academy; The New Day wins and advances to WrestleMania.
  • Last Woman Standing: Becky Lynch VS Nia Jax; Becky wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Jey Uso is here!

North Carolina State University fires up and bounces along with Main Event Jey, and Pat McAfee plays a dangerous game standing on the armchairs! From Bret VS Owen to Matt VS Jeff, we’re about to get Jey VS Jimmy in the third-ever Brother VS Brother WrestleMania grudge match! Jey gets the mic as fans chant “YEET! YEET! YEET!” Jey welcomes us to Monday Night Raw, and wants us to check this out. He knows his brothers are somewhere in the building. He knows The Bloodline’s in the building. He knows how the Bloodline rolls! SO Big Brother Jimmy, where you at?! Where you at, Uce!?

Jey waits for someone to show up somewhere, and the crowd spots them first! Fans boo as Jimmy & Solo make their way from the back of the stands. Jimmy gets a mic and goes to the apron while Solo paces around the outside. Fans chant “YEET! YEET! YEET!” again as Jey puts the sunglasses aside. The Usos stare each other down, the fans now chant “UCE! OH! UCE! OH!” Jey wants to say something, hesitates, but then says these two would always get to it but they always knew how to shake right back to this. But now it’s different. Regardless of what happened, the bad blood between them, Jey misses his brother. He does.

Jey knows Jimmy will say what he wants, but Jey doesn’t talk to him no more, doesn’t ride with him no more, doesn’t even see him no more! Jimmy can just come back. Jimmy says he never left! He protected Jey! Jey’s so dumb, he can’t see it! Jimmy is protecting Jey! It was Jey’s idea to leave The Bloodline, but Jimmy helped because he is Jey’s brother. So yeah, Jey leaves, and what happens? Lil’ Bro becomes the BIGGEST star on the Raw roster! Lil’ Bro becomes the top merch seller! Lil’ Bro goes off to become a tag team champion without Jimmy, but with CODY RHODES!? Who left who, Uce?

Jey forgot Jimmy! Everything Jey did that was big was cuz of Big Bro Jimmy! Everything! So listen loud and clear. The biggest moment in Jey’s career, the BIGGEST moment, is because of Jimmy! Jimmy stares Jey down, but Jey says no. Jey’s biggest moment in his career is going to be his dream match at WrestleMania 40: Jey VS Jimmy, and Jey knocks the yeet out Jimmy’s ass! Jey DECKS Jimmy, DECKS Solo off the apron, but then Jimmy SUPERKICKS Jey down! The fans boo but now Solo storms in and looms over Jey. Solo drags Jey up so Jimmy can look him in the face and tell him that Jey needs to get it right! JIMMY made Jey!

But here comes Cody Rhodes! The fans fire up as Cody DECKS Jimmy, then gets in to springboard and CODY CUTTER Solo!! The American Nightmare said he was gonna be a Bloodline Hunter, and he made sure they didn’t take out Jey! Cody tells The Bloodline it is only a matter of time before they lose it all at WrestleMania! Will Jey prove that younger or older doesn’t matter when he is the BETTER brother?

 

Adam Pearce is on the phone.

He’s telling Nick Aldis to stop being a hypocrite, telling Pearce to keep his roster in check when this is happening. But then Paul Heyman walks over and Pearce says he’ll call Aldis back. Pearce then asks Heyman what was all that, and Heyman says he owes Pearce an apology. He is sorry. That was not authorized by The Final Boss nor The Tribal Chief, and certainly not by Heyman. Jimmy & Solo went into business for themselves so Heyman apologizes. But listen, Pearce knows that there have been flight delays all day. Even private jets like theirs. Heyman is barely even dressed for TV, let alone has his make-up!

Pearce says those two were ready. Yeah, well, they got in on a different flight. But Roman Reigns is a chief of his word. Those two are already gone, out of the arena, and Pearce has Roman’s word. Call his bluff, put out a search party. Pearce knows Heyman is here on official business, which Heyman will handle, and then be gone. That is it. But when Heyman does his official business… everyone will be caught off guard. “And Mr. Pearce, sir, that’s not a prediction. That’s a spoiler.” The Wise Man heads out and calls Roman, but just what is Heyman teasing?

 

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: #DIY VS The Creed Brothers!

Unlike SmackDown’s mini-tournament, Raw and Adam Pearce say it’s win and you’re in! Tommaso Ciampa & Johnny Gargano want one more shot at Judgment Day, but so do Julius & Brutus! Will the Sicilian Psycho & Johnny Wrestling prove that when it comes to Mania Moments, you gotta do it yourself? Or will the Creeds be bringing golden tickets to the Diamond Mine?

Raw returns as The Creeds make their entrance. The teams fist bump to show respect, then the teams sort out. Julius starts against Ciampa, they circle and tie up. They’re in a deadlock, Ciampa goes for a waistlock but Julius facelocks. Julius wrangles Ciampa to the mat, flips him over, ONE, and Ciampa keeps moving. They trade facelocks, gator roll, and Julius gets another lateral press. ONE, but Julius gator rolls Ciampa around. Ciampa fights up, puts Julius on ropes, and the ref counts. Ciampa lets off, then CHOPS! Julius shoots in for the takedown! Julius has a leg, Ciampa fights but Julius turns him for the ANKLE LOCK!

Ciampa scrambles to the ROPEBREAK, and Julius lets off cleanly. Ciampa bails out, shakes it off, and he gets back in. They go again, Julius hits a fireman’s carry takeover! Tag to Brutus, and Julius feeds Ciampa to another fireman’s carry takeover! Brutus cording holds but Ciampa endures. Ciampa fights up, but Brutus facelocks. The fans rally as Brutus switches and rolls Ciampa. Ciampa fights up, headlocks, then ROCKS Brutus! Brutus DECKS Ciampa, then whips him to ropes. Ciampa ducks ‘n’ dodges, tag to Gargano! Ciampa slides, CHOPS, Gargano LARIATS and Ciampa JAWBREAKERS! Wrench and LARIAT!

Julius runs in, Gargano kicks and Ciampa gives him the boost for SLICED BREAD! The Creeds bail out, but DIY DOUBLE PLANCHA! Down go the Creeds, and DIY applaud and pat themselves on the back. The fans fire up and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Ciampa has Julius in a chinlock. The fans rally, Julius fights up to throw body shots, but Ciampa hits a back suplex! Julius lands out of it, but Ciampa elbows him away. Ciampa drop toeholds Julius, gets legs, but Julius BOOTS Ciampa away! Hot tags to Gargano and Brutus! Brutus rallies on DIY, TOSSES Gargano, then blocks Ciampa’s kick to get under and POWERBOMB him! Brutus sees DIY regroup, then he runs in to SPLASH them both! O’Conner on Ciampa, but Gargano runs up! NORTHERN LIGHTS! Brutus has a DOUBLE BRIDGE, TWO!! Tag to Julius and he gut wrench SLAMS Brutus on Ciampa!

Brutus helps Julius flip up and over to SPLASH onto Ciampa! Cover, TWO! The fans rally up as Julius drags Ciampa up. Ciampa throat chops! A bit dirty but Ciampa wants that win! Ciampa storms up on Julius, but Julius basement stalling suplexes!! The fans are thunderous, Gargano runs in, but Brutus intercepts! Brutus suplexes Gargano now, stalls, and then the Creeds SLAM and kip up! Then they both STANDING MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Ciampa stays in this for DIY but the Creeds keep cool. Julius stomps Ciampa, tags Brutus, and they KNEE Ciampa around! Then they DOUBLE GUTBUSTER! Ciampa sputters but Brutus tags Julius in.

Julius drags Ciampa up, tags Brutus back in, and Brutus climbs. Julius Electric Chair Lifts, but Gargano makes the save! Gargano ROCKS Julius, Brutus ROCKS Gargano! Ciampa BOOTS Brutus, Gargano swings on Julius but is sent into Ciampa! Ciampa pushes Gargano back so he can ELBOW Julius! DIY set up again but Brutus stops the Sliced Bread! Julius DECKS Ciampa, KNEE into the WIDOWMAKER! Julius scrapes Gargano out, Brutus POUNCES Ciampa over the desk! Pat fires up with Brutus and so do the fans! The Creeds say they run this now, and then Brutus drags Ciampa up while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Julius has Ciampa in a chinlock. Ciampa fights up, and he JAWBREAKERS free! Ciampa ELBOWS Brutus down, BOOTS Julius, then runs up, only for Julius to catch him and toss him back! But then Ciampa catches Julius for a REVERSE DDT! The fans fire up while both men are down and crawling! Hot tag to Gargano! Gargano slingshots to KICK Julius, then he CLOBBERS Brutus! ENZIGIRI for Julius, then he runs to DOUBLE KNEE Brutus! BULLDOG LARIAT COMBO! The fans fire up with Gargano while Julius ends up in another corner. Gargano runs in but is put on the apron!

Gargano GAMANGIRIS Julius, SUPERKICKS Brutus, then SLINGSHOT SPEARS Julius! Cover, TWO! Julius survives but Gargano puts him in a corner. Gargano CHOPS, then hoists Julius up top. Tag to Ciampa, Ciampa CHOPS Julius while Gargano DIVES onto Brutus! Ciampa CHOPS Julius again, goes up top, and fireman’s carries! Ciampa then tucks Julius in for the SUPER AIR RAID CRASH! Cover, TWO!! Julius survives again and shocks Ciampa! The fans are just as stunned, but Ciampa and Julius sit up. Ciampa stands, and he CHOPS! And CHOPS! Julius sits back up as Ciampa puts some stank on the CHOP!

Julius brings the straps down! Julius fires a forearm, Ciampa hits back, and the fans fire up as the shots keep going! They go faster and faster, harder and harder, meaner and meaner! The fans fire up as this just turns into a brawl of haymakers and SLAPS! Ciampa then gets around, ripcord and HAYMAKER! ROLLING- TACKLE from Julius! And then the ANKLE LOCK!! Ciampa reaches out, moves around, but Gargano runs up! Julius kicks him, then gets him up with one arm to POWERBOMB! Then it’s back to the ANKLE LOCK on Ciampa! Brutus gets in to get Gargano for an ANKLE LOCK of his own!

The fans are thunderous as DIY endures! Ciampa and Gargano fight, turn things over, SICILIAN CROSSFACE and GargaNO Escape!! The fans are thunderous as The Creeds power up and lift both DIY! They fireman’s carry, then TOSS DIY into each other!! The fans are thunderous as Julius goes up to MOONSAULT onto Ciampa! Brutus MOONSAULTS, too! Cover, TWO?!?! Ciampa survives and the fans are loving this! Julius tags back in, Brutus climbs up! “This is Awesome!” as Julius Electric Chair Lifts Ciampa! But Ciampa VICTORY ROLLS to get under the Brutus Ball!! Cover, Brutus tips it! Gargano TOSSES Brutus then SUPERKICKS Julius!! Ciampa has the cover, DIY WINS!!

Winners: DIY, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

Julius can’t believe it! He kicked out at 3.1, but a loss is a loss! And for the first time ever, DIY is going to Mania! Will Philadelphia soon be historic for a DIY championship victory?

 

Judgment Day meets backstage.

Rhea Ripley is with Dominik Mysterio, Finn Balor & JD McDonagh, but also Andrade. Dom says he’s always liked Andrade’s style, but things have changed since the last time he was in the WWE. The Judgment Day runs Raw now. Rhea says yeah, and they don’t extend invitations to just anyone. Judgment Day is very exclusive. JD says very exclusive. But if Andrade continues to impress them, they’ll see about making things happen. And Finn says he just heard that Andrade has a match next week, so the Judgment Day will be watching him. Sounds good. See you next week. But then in steps Damian Priest.

The Punisher says hello to El Idolo, and El Idolo says hello to Senor Dinero. Andrade heads out, will he quite literally win his way into the club? But as for Priest, Finn asks him what he was up to. Priest was getting a closer look at that DIY VS Creeds match. DIY won, but whatever, they can handle those guys. But JD, they thought he could handle Ricochet last week, and run the gauntlet, and then go to WrestleMania to bring even more gold back to Judgment Day. JD says he did he belonged in there. But also, he battered Ricochet, who got lucky at the end there. Right, Finn? Finn hesitates, and Rhea says Priest is right on this one.

Ricochet made a fool out of JD! A fool? Yes. A fool? Yes. That’s why tonight, Dom will make it right. Right, Dom? Yeah, Mami. Let’s go talk to Pearce to make it official. Dom & JD head out, and the others are confident Dom’s got this. But does he, though? Or will the One and Only have two wins over Judgment Day in as many weeks?

 

Candice LeRae & Indi Hartwell VS Kayden Carter & Katana Chance!

The Poison Pixie certainly lived up to that name last week when she bullied Maxxine Dupri as part of beating her and Ivy Nile last week. Will Candice’s toxic tongue strike again? Or will the party not be stopped by her harsh vibes?

The teams sort out and Candice starts against Kayden. Candice rushes up, Kayden gets around and O’Conner Rolls, TWO! Kayden springboards to basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Kayden stalks Candice, Candice ELBOWS her away then tags Indi. Kayden dodges Candice to SUPERKICK, but Indi BOOTS Kayden! Cover, TWO! Indi drags Kayden up, tags Candice back in, and they mug Kayden. Candice CLUBS away on Kayden, fires off furious fists, then covers. TWO, and Candice grows frustrated already. The fans rally, Candice steps up but Kayden avoids the senton! Tags to Katana and Indi! Katana blasts past Indi, comes back and BULLDOGS!

Katana keeps moving, ducks ‘n’ dodges, then SHOTGUNS Indi to a corner! The fans fire up as Katana stomps away on Indi! Indi shoves Katana, Katana runs corner to corner to A-LIST LARIAT! Katana shoves Indi down, runs up, but into a back suplex! Katana lands out, but her leg jams! The ref and Kayden check, then the ref keeps Indi back. Indi says okay, and she stays by Candice. But Candice tags in to WRECK Kayden! And she SLAMS Katana’s leg into the post!! HALF CRAB and DEEP! Katana taps, Candice & Indi win!

Winners: Candice LeRae & Indi Hartwell, by submission

Candice smiles and celebrates with Indi, but Indi doesn’t want to. Candice says a win is a win, but just what is going on in her toxic mind?

 

Cody Rhodes makes his way to the ring.

NC State fires up again as The American Nightmare walks down the ramp, and this time the fans can sing along with the song, “WHOA~ OH~!” Cody gets his pyro then gets the mic. “In less than three weeks time, I will stand opposed for the second year in a row, in the main event, with the lights on brightest, I will challenge for the WWE Undisputed Championship, against the greatest champion in all of sports, The Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns. And this Friday on SmackDown, Roman and I are going to have a little conversation, if you will. But there are… complications. Factors, elements, combustible elements, namely… The Rock.”

Fans boo but Cody says The Rock took to Instagram on Friday, and followed it up with “extremely entertaining” concert. Too bad The Rock didn’t wanna be here tonight. Something Cody took from the Instagram post: The Rock referred to himself as “Our Favorite Heel.” A bit of an inside term, but we’re not dumb, we know that means he’s the “bad guy.” Cody has known Heels. Bobby Heenan, Arn Anderson, Michael Hayes, “Superstar” Billy Graham, “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair! Fans “WOO~” and Cody says he doesn’t think The Rock is a Heel. He’s just an assh*le. The fans go nuts hearing that!

Cody doesn’t want Rock getting upset, he doesn’t want the “seven bucks team” to get upset, he doesn’t want anyone getting emotional. Cody knows how Rock feels about emotions, he poked fun at Cody tearing up at discussing “finishing the story” with good friend, Michael Cole. There’s no crying in pro-wrestling, Jimmy Dugan, we get it. But hasn’t The Rock been crying behind the scenes this whole time? Once that hashtag came out, once fans chanted something else, The Rock cried to his buddies on the TKO board and said “Hey, this is gonna be some good PR for The Rock! I need to save WWE!” God knows, look at this house. They sure needed “saving,” huh?

The fans cheer but Cody says Rock wanted great PR. Until it wasn’t. TKO said OMG yes, put on the Gucci shirt, get those muscles looking big. It’s because they are Yes People, they are enablers, they won’t dare tell The Rock like it is, so Cody’s going to. Cody tells The Rock, “You’re a lot of things. You’re a lot of wonderful things. You are the Braham Bull, you are The Great One.” Cody still has shoes with The Rock’s logo on it! The Rock is the only guy Cody honestly feels is a Mount Rushmore wrestler. But he is also a terrible salesman, a carny succubus, and for those who don’t get what that means, The Rock is “a whiny b*tch!”

Fans lose their minds again but Cody says The Rock has been convinced otherwise. But don’t think that for two seconds this locker room needs The Rock more than The Rock needs it! That’s a rule of wrestling, nobody is bigger than the business! And sure, Cody brought up his mom, so it is fair game for The Rock to use that. But Cody knows The Rock’s mom. Here’s what Cody will tell us about The Rock’s mom. She is a wonderful lady, salt of the earth, she helped Cody chop Kevin in a dark match. Cody has nothing but respect for The Rock’s mom, something The Rock should’ve echoed back towards Cody’s mom.

But see, The Rock was talking about whipping Cody, handing a bloody weight belt to Cody’s mom, and normally someone as powerful as The Rock, Mama Rhodes would tremble. But The Rock doesn’t know Cody’s mom. Cody was more scared than she was, because she ain’t scared of nothing. This is the same woman who once jumped out of her chair at a Willie Nelson concert and beat up an undercover cop! She ain’t afraid of The Rock! Cody has been asked, April 6th, biggest tag match of all time, Rock & Roman VS Cody & Seth. Seth Rollins, the World Heavyweight Champion, a man The Rock should respect because that man has carried The Rock’s company!

How will Cody get past that match? How will April 7th look? Will it be a fair fight? Cody can tell us honestly… He doesn’t know. Cody does not know if it will be Bloodline Rules or not. Hell, he might not #FinishTheStory. “But Dwayne… What do you know? How can you be so sure of your own self, right?” The Rock hasn’t been in the ring in real action in years! April 6th, the bell is gonna ring, and what happens then? Is The Rock gonna bring The Great One, the hero we all had growing up? Is he bringing that #BigDwayneEnergy? Or is it gonna be LDS, Little D*ck Syndrome?! The fans chant “L D S! L D S!”

Cody says The Rock has referred to himself as The Final Boss. Kudos for that nickname, maybe he really is that. Maybe Cody is too naive to see it. But at WrestleMania, Cody doesn’t think The Rock will be The Final Boss. At WrestleMania, he’s just Roman’s side chick. But then ladies and gentlemen, his name is Paul Heyman, and he serves as The Wise Man to Your Tribal Chief, the reigning! Defending! Undisputed! WWE Universal Heavyweight Champion, Roman… Reigns! And as Special Counsel to the Bloodline, Heyman is here to say to Cody that the ideals that Cody and Heyman share are far greater than the interests on which they conflict.

By example, don’t you hate it when someone comes out to demand an apology? Not that Cody’s done that, but Heyman is still going to do that. Heyman came out here with some “friends” of his, and he apologized. For a Wise Man, that was pretty freakin’ stupid. One: because it didn’t work. Two: because it was just dumb. And for that, Cody, to you and the fans, Heyman humbly apologizes. Cody says whoa, whoa, whoa. He didn’t ask for an apology, and he certainly knows Heyman wants permission to be in the ring. Heyman is a Hall of Famer starting this year, if he wants into the ring, be Cody’s guest.

Heyman thanks Cody for that but he’s fine on the apron. He carries with him a message from The Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns. Talk about Heels… You may think of Heyman anything negative you want, and that might be understanding the obvious. Heyman is not trustworthy, but Roman is a chief of his word. Heyman assures that this Friday on SmackDown, Roman will be face to face with Cody. American Nightmare, Tribal Chief, challenger and champion. And when they are face to face, there will not be a single other member of The Bloodline in sight. Except for Heyman, but he is no physical threat.

Heyman holds the title belt, the beads, whispers things in Roman’s ear, such as his love and respect. But Cody has Roman’s word that if he shows up on SmackDown, Roman will show up alone. Cody says Roman shows up alone, no Bloodline outside of Heyman, it’s a deal. They good? Heyman has some jet lag, he forgot one little point. And don’t boo him, he’s talking to Cody! Cody says yes they’re booing, and he’s about to go full Homelander and rip Heyman’s throat out if he doesn’t get to the point. Fans like the reference. Heyman composes himself and says if Roman Reigns shows up alone this Friday on SmackDown, then Cody must show up to SmackDown alone, too.

Cody steps closer to Heyman and Heyman is a bit nervous. Cody tells Heyman, “Deal!” They shake hands, and Heyman smiles. The Wise Man negotiated a purely one-on-one meeting between his Tribal Chief and American Nightmare, but can we trust Heyman was telling the truth about Roman telling the truth?

 

Nia Jax speaks.

“You know what I’ve realized? Becky Lynch has never beaten me. And after tonight, she never will. Because after I break her face again, I will be taking her spot at WrestleMania. I will finish business with Rhea Ripley, and not only will I walk out the Last Woman Standing, but I will become Women’s World Champion.” The Irresistible Force is ready for the Big Time, but will she A-Nia-late her?

 

Cody Rhodes returns backstage.

And Jey says there he go! But real quick, Cody can’t be going to SmackDown alone. Cody says he gave them his word. But The Bloodline isn’t gonna play fair! They’re all gonna be there! If Cody needs Jey, Jeys’ got him. Cody hears that, but he knows what he’s dealing with. They shake hands and Jey heads out. Will Cody be able to have that fair, one-on-one meeting? Or does Jey have a point about The Bloodline?

 

Dominik Mysterio w/ JD McDonagh VS Ricochet!

It seems Pearce agreed to the idea that Dirty Dom should try and clean up The Irish Ace’s mess. Will Dom be able to get revenge on Ricochet? Or will Ricochet be the One and Only person holding their head high tonight?

Raw returns and Dom has made his entrance. The bell rings, Dom and Ricochet circle, and they tie up. Ricochet waistlocks, Dom fights the lift and grabs ropes. The ref counts, Ricochet lets off, but Dom ELBOWS him away! Dom fires hands, soaks up the heat, then storms up, but into haymakers! Ricochet CHOPS, kicks then flexes on Dom. Ricochet whips, Dom reverses, but Ricochet goes up and over. Ricochet ducks ‘n’ dodges to then handspring back elbow! The fans fire up while Dom bails out! JD is there to coach Dom up, but Ricochet runs in! JD gets Dom to safety, but Ricochet handsprings to hero land!

The fans fire up, Ricochet then goes to ropes to TORNILLO PLANCHA! Direct hit on Dom and Ricochet tells JD to back off. Ricochet puts Dom in, Dom distracts the ref, but JD grabs Ricochet’s leg! Ricochet kicks JD away, but then Dom WRECKS Ricochet with a dropkick! Dom soaks up the heat and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Dom has Ricochet up top. Dom climbs but Ricochet throws body shots! The fans rally behind Ricochet as he sends Dom staggering. Ricochet hops down as Dom comes running back, and Ricochet GAMANGIRIS him away! Ricochet then springboards, but Dom trips him up! Ricochet flops to the mat, then Dom kicks and FACEBUSTERS! Cover, TWO! Ricochet is still in this and JD argues the count. Dom looms over Ricochet, scuffs him around, then mockingly cheers him on. Fans boo but Dom brings Ricochet up. Dom gives some Latino Heat, then suplexes! Uno Amigo, but fans boo.

Dom gets Ricochet up but Ricochet suplexes Dom instead! And then fireman’s carry, DYNAMITE KICK! Cover, TWO! Dom is still in this and JD coaches him but the fans rally for Ricochet. Ricochet stands, storms up on Dom, but Dom shoots around to roll him up! With tights! TWO, Ricochet blocks a kick and KICKS Dom down! Ricochet hurries up top, the fans fire up, but Ricochet has to bail out of the 450 as Dom moves! Dom runs in again, but into a SUPERKICK! JD gets on the apron, so Ricochet triangle jump DROPKICKS! But then Dom DROPKICKS Ricochet onto ropes! Dom dials it up but Ricochet ducks!

Dom spins around, into the RECOIL!! Cover, Ricochet wins!

Winner: Ricochet, by pinfall

But then JD runs in! Ricochet dodges, goes up and around, BOOTS JD away, then BOOTS him again! Ricochet even flips up and out of the ring at the same time! Ricochet gets the better of Judgment Day again, just how disappointed is Mami going to be in her Latino Heat this time?

 

Sami Zayn is backstage.

He finds Chad Gable and wants to talk with him. Last week’s match, that was an honor. Sami hasn’t been pushed like that in a long time, it could’ve gone either way. Gable says yeah, it was great. Thanks. Is Gable alright? Yeah, he’s fine. Kinda feels like not… Gable says he’s fine, so leave it at that. C’mon, man, how many years have they known each other? Sami knows when something’s bothering Gable, so he should just say it. Gable says look, last week, the WrestleMania opportunity, the whole thing, it just meant more to him. Sami says he’s been hearing Gable say that for weeks, and it is really unfair.

Does Gable really think he’s the only one this title opportunity matters to? Sami has a family, too! Sami’s kid cries when Papa loses a match, too. Sami has people he’s let down and is trying to make proud. After all the years put into this, Gable can’t tell Sami what matters more because he doesn’t know Sami like that. Gable has Sami calm down, and says he knows all that. But it isn’t all about that. Then what is all this? Gable says Sami can’t beat Gunther. Gable then leaves, and Sami is at a loss for words. Is this bitter side of Gable only going to get worse as we go down this Road to WrestleMania?

 

Adam Pearce is in the ring.

Raw returns with the GM by a table, and he welcomes us to a contract signing to make official the Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship for WrestleMania! The fans cheer, and Pearce introduces first, the challenger, Sami Zayn! The Great Liberator makes his entrance and the fans sing along with his song. Sami still looks troubled by what Gable said just moments ago, but he still high-fives fans and gets in the ring. Then Pearce introduces the longest reigning Intercontinental Champion of all time, Der Ring General, GUNTHER! The fans boo as Gunther walks in, having reached Day 647!

Gunther smiles as Sami watches him make his way down the ramp and into the ring. Pearce says we know how this works, but Gunther says before we proceed, let us call this what it is: the most important contract signing for the most important match in the history of this championship. And why, why, why is the challenger dressed no better than any of the bums in the audience? Fans boo but Sami just shrugs that off. Sami gets a mic to say that Gunther keeps sitting there all smug, and it’s really starting to piss Sami off. Gunther thinks this is just another day at the office, that he’ll steamroll through Sami like any other contender.

But with all respect to Gunther, he really has. He has beaten everyone that has come his way, and has done it on his own. Gunther doesn’t believe Sami can do it. A lot of people didn’t believe Sami at many points in his career. They didn’t believe he’d even make it to WWE, let alone win championships and main event a WrestleMania. And if you ask The Usos, they didn’t believe Sami would be one of the guys to end the longest tag title reign in WWE history, but he did! And one year later, he will make history again by ending the longest Intercontinental title reign in WWE history! Sami signs his part and pushes the contract over to Gunther.

The fans cheer Sami on but Gunther waits it out. Gunther tells Sami, what Sami should do is listen to his new friend, Gable. Gable doesn’t believe Sami can win. The people here cheer Sami, they probably even love Sami. But even they don’t believe Sami can win. And y’know, when Gunther looks Sami in the eyes, and if Sami was honest with himself, even Sami doesn’t believe he can win. So what Sami is doing right now is standing on Gunther’s doorstep and begging him to get the beating of a lifetime on the Grandest Stage of Them All! So whatever Sami has to do, from training to believing, just keep doing that. Because at WrestleMania, Sami’s dreams will meet reality.

Gunther grins and signs his part, and it is now official! Gunther then stands, title on his shoulder, and takes his leave. The fans boo, but then Sami tells Gunther to wait. Gunther steps back inside to hear Sami as Sami turns around. Gunther looks in Sami’s eyes and believes Sami doesn’t believe? Sami stands to get in Gunther’s face and dares him to look again. Get a good long look, because these are the eyes of the man who will take you down at Mania! The fans fire up, and now Sami leaves first. Gunther still just grins, but will Sami use a Helluva Kick to wipe that smile off his face?

We follow Sami as he storms backstage, right past DIY and The Awesome Truth. Truth asks what’s up with Sami, but The Miz says that is the mindset of WrestleMania right there. That’s what they need. DIY wishes Awesome Truth luck. Awesome Truth knows DIY is into the ladder match, and they are gonna have their own qualifier. Miz & Truth just need to beat… Indus Sher. Jinder Mahal tells Veer & Sanga to warm up for the match. They head out, and Truth says he feels sorry for whoever has to face those guys. Miz stares at Truth, and he has DIY hold off. Miz will explain. The Awesome Truth heads to gorilla, their match is next!

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The Awesome Truth VS Indus Sher w/ Jinder Mahal!

Miz wants a remix of the theme song but Truth says to just follow his lead. NC State knows what’s up, but will the Awesome Truth finally reach the top of the tag division 13 years after they first teamed? We’ll see, after the break!

Raw returns as Indus Sher makes their entrance, the Modern Day Maharaja by their side. The teams sort out and Truth starts against Sanga. The fans echo “WHAT’S UP?!” but Sanga roars! Truth is scared now so he tags Miz. Truth fires Miz up, Miz runs up and dodges Sanga to fire off haymakers! Miz kicks, whips, but Sanga blocks! Sanga whips and CLOBBERS Miz! Jinder nods as Sanga then scoops Miz and brings him over. Veer tags in, Sanga SLAMS Miz, then Veer ELBOW DROPS! Indus Sher say “NAMASTE!” but the fans say “WHAT’S UP!?” with Truth. Veer HIP DROPS Miz, then looms over him.

Veer eggs Miz on, drags him up with shoulder claws, and then steps over Miz for the neck wrench! Miz endures as Veer still digs a claw into his shoulder. The fans rally for Miz, Miz fights up and throws body shots! Miz reaches out but Veer knees low! Veer SHOVES Miz to the corner, runs in, but Miz BOOTS! Miz ELBOWS Sanga, but Veer catches him! Veer puts Miz back int he corner, but Miz ducks the boot to tag Truth! Truth dodges Veer and starts up the shoulder tackles! Truth gets around Veer to SPIN-OUT BOMB! The fans fire up as Truth shouts out Cena with “You Can’t See Me!” Truth runs to Five Knuckle Shuffle!

Jinder is not happy now as Truth fireman’s carries! But Veer slips free! Truth drop toeholds to the STF!! The fans fire up but Sanga stomps Truth! Miz fires off kicks on Sanga, then body shots! Truth joins in, they mug and whip Sanga, to DOUBLE DROPKICK! Sanga staggers around, Veer runs up, but into a full nelson! Truth and Miz combine for a SKULL CRUSHING LIE DETECTOR!! But Sanga whips Miz away! Miz WRECKS Jinder with it, but Sanga runs up! Sanga knocks Miz down, Miz anchors Sanga, Sanga ELBOWS Truth, Truth falls onto Veer for the cover! Awesome Truth wins!!

Winners: The Awesome Truth, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

The fans fire up, and Truth doesn’t even realize what happened! Miz celebrates with Truth and Truth puts it together! They’re now one of the six in the ladder match! Will this combination of teamwork and luck be just what they need to take those titles from Judgment Day?

 

Sami confronts Gable now.

Sami tells Gable to tell him why. Why what? Why does Gable think Sami can’t beat Gunther? Well you just saw why! With Gunther, it isn’t just physical, it is mental. Sami made his career out of being the underdog that crawls his way out of any hole he’s in, right? Just like last week! Sami found the window of opportunity to get out of a bad situation any time he can. Gunther’s on a different level! You gonna sit and wait for that window to appear? It doesn’t happen with Gunther! He’s a different beast, a different animal. If Sami doesn’t change his mentality, then he can’t beat Gunther. Gable leaves Sami with a lot to think again. Is there a way Sami can change enough to defeat Der Ring General?

 

CM Punk speaks.

“Do I plan at being in WrestleMania? WrestleMania is in Philadelphia, what’re the first four letters in Philadelphia? Phil. You can’t have WrestleMania Philadelphia without Phil. Whether I’m invited or uninvited, Punk will be there.” And next week in Chicago, Punk returns to Raw! Will the Second City Saint find a way to be part of the biggest WrestleMania ever?

 

Drew McIntyre is here!

The Scottish Terminator, or as his new shirt says, “The Savior of WrestleMania,” makes his way to the ring, NC State a bit torn about seeing him. But then Seth Rollins is here, too!? McIntyre is upset but the fans sing along, “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~!” as The Visionary struts his way out. Rollins swaggers right past McIntyre in his green storm pattern suit, and steps into the ring first. McIntyre frowns as he follows Rollins in, and sits in a corner. The fans continue to sing, which Rollins revels in for a moment. Rollins has the mic to then say, “RALEIGH, NORTH CAROLINA~! Welcome to Monday Night Rollins~!

“And Drew, hah, sorry, I didn’t even see you there. I was too busy, uh, y’know, soaking up the spotlight, right?” McIntyre has a mic to say, “Alright, here we go.” Here goes what, Drew? McIntyre says no, no, get it all out of your system, he knows Rollins has more! McIntyre can stay in the back while Rollins enjoys the spotlight, because after WrestleMania, that spotlight’s all McIntyre’s. Hey, hey, c’mon. Rollins is here with an honest cause. Rollins doesn’t like McIntyre, he thinks he’s stupid, a hypocrite, has said a lot of dumb things lately, but Rollins is here to admit that one thing McIntyre said is absolutely right and he wants to say it to McIntyre’s face, right here in Raleigh, in front of the fine people.

Now, they always say the first step to recovery is the hardest, so bare with Rollins. He has been working on this all week, but… “My name is Seth Freakin’ Rollins, and I’m a spotlight junkie.” The fans chant “Spotlight Junkie!” and also sing, but McIntyre says everything is just a joke to Rollins, isn’t it? Look at Rollins! He’s a parody of himself at this point. But honestly, McIntyre doesn’t care. He tried reasoning, he gave the answers, and now he only cares about their match and the world title. And you wanna know the real punchline, funny man? “What?” McIntyre says they say that because they’re happy McIntyre sidelined Punk, thanks for remembering!

But the punchline is when McIntyre beats Rollins for that title. The fans chant for “C M PUNK!” but McIntyre says don’t be ridiculous. Punk’s waiting until next week to return because he’d never show up in a place like Raleigh. The fans boo but McIntyre says see, they’re booing Punk! Punk is only getting off his couch to be at his local arena. Rollins tells McIntyre to shut up already. Oh, seems McIntyre got Rollins’ attention. Rollins takes off the sunglasses to say yeah, McIntyre has his attention. Because this isn’t a joke! When Rollins says he is a junkie, it isn’t a joke! He’s been doing this for 20 YEARS! Just like McIntyre!

And every time Rollins comes out of the curtain, that’s his fix. And it gets better and better every single time. Rollins comes out here, lays it all on the line, and it just gets better and better! When he hears the fans sing the song so loud, Rollins can barely speak, “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~!” That’s Rollins’ fix! That is the spotlight he craves, and y’know what? Rollins wants the spotlight as bright as it can possibly be. So yeah, McIntyre’s been busy online entertaining people with memes, so he hasn’t been listening to Rollins. So Rollins will get this through McIntyre’s thick skull: Night One, Rollins takes the biggest star in Hollywood and his side chick, and makes them his b*tches!

Then on Night Two, the biggest spotlight possible will be shined down on McIntyre and Rollins and the World Heavyweight Championship! McIntyre says all hail the savior, Seth Rollins! This is what McIntyre wanted! The passion and desire, not the stupid laughing and dancing. Rollins had McIntyre all the way to the finish. Rollins has done this 20 years, just like McIntyre. They’ve given their lives to this industry, and that is what the title is about! The wrestlers’ title, the workhorse championship! Rollins had McIntyre with him until he mentioned the bigger spotlight and how Rollins pins one of the biggest stars in the world.

Why can’t it just be about Rollins’ hard work to make that title, and all of McIntyre’s hard work to get this chance? Why can’t that be the reason they’re getting the biggest spotlight!? Rollins has had his priorities all backwards, McIntyre has been giving him all the answers. McIntyre said he is over the BS, and all he cares about is Rollins making it to the ring on Night Two. And if Rollins can’t walk, then McIntyre will wheel him down. If not, McIntyre will carry Rollins down. At Mania, McIntyre doesn’t get the moment he deserves. He gets the moment he has bloody EARNED. The fans do cheer that!

Rollins smirks and says, “Ah, Drew. There it is. That’s right, you wanna call me a spotlight junkie, but you want the spotlight just as bad as I do, don’t you? You’re an addict, just like I am. And you’ve been begging for spotlight for the past four years, because you won the WrestleMania main event. You did, back in 2020, in an empty warehouse. And all we’ve been hearing from Drew McIntyre for the past four years was how that wasn’t good enough. You’ve been whining and complaining and bitching and moaning that you deserve better, that you deserve more. The problem is, Drew, when everybody came back around, and the lights got bright again, what happened? You fumbled the ball.

“And that’s the difference between you and me. When the lights are the brightest, I shine, baby. I shine bright. And at WrestleMania 40, the lights are gonna be as bright as they have ever been. And you are gonna find out you are not as good as you think you are.” Rollins drops the mic, but this time McIntyre smirks. The verbal battle continues, but who will put their money where their mouth is once this one finally happens?

 

Becky Lynch speaks.

“I’m a wanted woman, and I don’t even have the title. Yet. But we’re less than three weeks away from WrestleMania, so why would I risk it all? Because I don’t know anything else. All I know is taking risks. All I know is fighting. And all I know is tonight, I’m gonna be the Last Woman Standing.” Becky is fired up to finally do what she hasn’t done in the most extreme way possible. Will she be the immovable object to Nia’s irresistible force?

 

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The New Day VS The Alpha Academy!

Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods have been W, W, E, World, Tag, Team, CHAMPIONS~, but they’ve never been a part of a title match as big as this Six Pack Ladder challenge! Will they look to be part of history once again? Or will Akira Tozawa & Otis say “A THANK YEW~!” for this golden opportunity?

Raw returns as the Academy makes their entrance. The teams sort out and Woods starts against the tree trunk, Otis. The fans rally for “NEW! DAY ROCKS!” Otis and Woods tie up, but Woods kicks low then headlocks. Otis powers up and out then runs Woods over! Otis storms up on Woods, GUT RAMS him back down, then brings him back up. Otis GUT RAMS Woods again, then runs to CLOBBER Woods! Otis swivels his hips, the fans echo “Oh~ yeah!” Otis tags Tozawa and the Academy mugs Woods. Tozawa brings Woods around but Woods CHOPS! Woods tags Kofi, he and Kofi double whip Tozawa but Tozawa holds ropes!

Tozawa fires hands, dodges Woods then BOOTS Woods down! Kofi kicks low, whips Tozawa to a corner, but Tozawa BOOTS Kofi away! Tozawa goes up to FLYING RANA! The fans fire up as Tozawa sees New Day regroup outside. Tozawa runs to DIVE! Direct hit on both New Day, and Otis joins in for “A THANK YEW~!” The Academy stands tall as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Tozawa fights a chinlock. Tozawa reaches for Otis but Woods back suplexes. Tozawa lands out to then DROPKICK Woods down! The fans rally as Woods and Tozawa crawl, hot tags to Otis and Kofi! Otis CLOBBERS Kofi, CLOBBERS him again, then whips him to ropes. WRECKER ELBOW! Woods runs in, Otis dodges, to LARIAT! Otis sees Kofi leap off the corner, and catches him for a WORLD’S STRONGEST SLAM! Otis rips the shirt off, winds up the hips, and then starts up the CATERPILLAR! ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Kofi survives but Otis hurries to step on him! Tag to Tozawa, and Otis goes up!

Otis VADER BOMBS but FLOPS as Kofi moves! Tozawa hurries up top while Kofi SUPERKICKS Otis! Kofi turns around into the CROSSBODY from Tozawa! Cover, TWO! Tozawa SUPERKICKS Kofi but Woods tags in! Woods GAMANGIRIS Tozawa, then steps in to TORNADO DDT! Cover, TWO! Tozawa toughs it out but Woods grits his teeth as he goes to the corner. Woods climbs, but Tozawa rises! Tozawa throws body shots, Woods CLUBS Tozawa! Tozawa throws more hands and climbs up! The fans rally as they brawl up top! Tozawa brings Woods up but Woods fights the lift! Woods throws body shots in return!

Woods shifts position to get under Tozawa for a fireman’s carry! But then Tozawa pops up to SUPER STEINER!! Tozawa rips off his shirt, climbs back up top, SUPER SENTON!! Cover, Kofi breaks it! The fans fire up but Otis drags Kofi out! Otis whips Kofi at steps, Kofi goes up and jumps off the steps to TORNADO DDT to the floor! Kofi hurries back up to the apron but Tozawa SCREW HIGH KICKS him down! Tozawa dodges Woods, pop-up, but Woods blocks the rana to then SPINNING POWERBOMB! Woods sees the WrestleMania sign, hurries up the corner, and he tightrope walks! LIMIT BREAK ELBOW!! Cover, New Day wins!

Winners: The New Day, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

The New Day are the ones saying A THANK YEW~ as they put their names down for the Six Pack Ladder Match! Will they once again climb to the top of the WWE Tag Team Division and bring home those championships?

 

Liv Morgan confronts Becky Lynch.

Becky asks if she’ll have to watch out for Liv as well. Well, you should always #WatchMe, but no, not tonight. Nia is all Becky’s. Liv just wants Becky to kick Nia’s ass. Liv leaves, will Becky kick ass and then some?

 

Cody walks with his dog, Pharaoh, backstage.

Rollins finds him and brings up Friday. One on one? One on one. Rollins nods and says he loves Pharaoh’s bandanna. The Visionary trusts the American Nightmare can handle himself, but will we be able to trust The Tribal Chief?

 

Last Woman Standing: Becky Lynch VS Nia Jax!

From the origins of “The Man” in WWE to the aftermath of Elimination Chamber: Perth, these two have battled, but never as brutally as this! They’re able to go anywhere and do anything, but who will be the Last Woman Standing this close to WrestleMania 40?

The bell rings and the two rush in! Becky DROPKICKS Nia and Nia goes to a corner. Becky runs in but Nia puts Becky on the apron. Becky ROCKS Nia, goes up a corner, then leaps to MISSILE DROPKCIK! Nia stumbles and tumbles out of the ring, so Becky WRECKS her with another dropkick! Becky then goes to the apron for a FLYING FOREARM! Nia stays up, Becky tries again, but Nia dodges! Fireman’s carry and Nia POSTS Becky, to then SAMOAN DROP her into barriers! The ref counts as Becky is down, but she stands at 4 of 10. Nia CLOBBERS Becky and wants the count! The count climbs but Nia is impatient.

Nia clears off the desk, Becky stands at 5 of 10, and she leans against barriers. Becky comes back with body shots and haymakers, but Nia ROCKS her with a forearm! Becky staggers away as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Becky is bringing out a table! The fans fire up as Becky sets that up ringside. There’s been a lot of chaos during the break according to commentary, from chairs to kendo sticks to even a copy of Becky’s book, The Man: Not Your Average Average Girl! But Nia storms over to stop Becky and SMACK her off the desk! Nia puts Becky in the ring, takes that table for her own and sets it up. The table doesn’t cooperate and fans boo, but Nia goes for chairs instead. She slides those in the ring, Becky manages to stand at 7 of 10, and she grabs at those chairs. Nia ditches the table, it just doesn’t wanna work.

Nia storms in but Becky JAMS her with a chair, SMACKS her with it, then clinches! Nia fights the slam, fireman’s carries Becky, and FULL METAL SAMOAN DROPS!! Becky writhes from hitting chairs but Nia looms over her. Nia soaks up the heat as she counts along. Becky flounders to ropes and drags herself up at 7! Nia sits a chair up, fans want a table, but Nia scoops Becky. Becky slips around to a SLEEPER! Nia RAMS Becky into buckles again and again until Becky lets go. But then Becky BULLDOGS Nia off the chair! Nia is down for the count now, and Becky leans against ropes to stay up herself.

Nia stirs at 5, stands at 8, but Becky is up top! Becky leaps, into a CHAIR SHOT! Nia SMACKS Becky again and again and again! The fans boo but Nia finally stops. Nia puts that chair aside and goes out to get some kendo sticks! Nia puts those in, but Becky grabs one! Nia snatches it from her to SMACK! And SMACK! And SMACK! Becky sputters and staggers, Nia clinches and scoops! Nia SLAMS Becky onto chairs! Then Nia runs to drop the leg, brother! Nia wants the count and the count begins! Becky sputters as we reach 5 of 10. Becky grabs that kendo stick but Nia SMACKS Becky with a chair! And again!

Nia kicks Becky around, then uses the chair to take a seat on Becky’s body!! The fans boo as the count begins, but Becky SMACKS Nia with the kendo stick! And again and again and again, even in the butt! Nia stands up, into more shots! Becky stands and she fires away until Nia scurries out of the ring! Becky pursues but Nia CLOBBERS her! Nia pulls the steel steps apart now, and takes that top half to RAM Becky down! Becky flounders, Nia hauls her up and puts her in the ring. Becky’s on the apron and Nia takes aim! Nia runs up, APRN LEG DROP only gets apron! Becky avoids disaster, then has Nia by the steps! DDT onto the steel!

Nia is down again and the count begins. Nia stirs at 5 of 10, sits up at 6, but Becky SMACKS her off steps! Nia falls over again and the count resets. Becky hurries to go looking for things while Nia rises again. Becky has a new table! The fans fire up as Becky gets that in the ring. Nia stands at 7, staggers after Becky, and Raw goes back to break.

Raw returns once again and Nia mugs Becky against barriers! Nia puts Becky on a table, and surprise! There’s a ladder set up now! Nia climbs the ladder?! She also demands Pat support the ladder. But Becky gets off the table so now Nia has no reason to be up there. Nia storms after Becky, but gets a FIRE EXTINGUISHER BLAST!! The fans fire up as Becky cools Nia off, then JAMS her with the canister! Becky puts Nia in the ring, and there’s a table waiting in a corner! Becky lines up the shot, and runs in, but Nia SAMOAN DROPS Becky through the table!!! Both women are down in the wreckage and the count begins!

Nia flounders away from the wreckage but she still needs to stand. Nia is up at 5, and she isn’t satisfied with this! She drags Becky all the way to another corner and puts her in the drop zone! Nia climbs up, for the A-NIA-LATOR!! Nia shouts for the count, the count begins, and Nia storms around as she points to the Mania sign. Becky is still down at 5 of 10, only starts stirring at 7, and she slumps out of the ring to stand up! Nia is furious, goes out after Becky, and kicks things aside to keep after her. Nia asks if Becky’s vision is blurry. Nia fireman’s carries Becky up the steel steps and along the apron, aiming for that other table!

The fans freak out but Becky fights with elbows! Becky CLUBS away on Nia and the fans are thunderous! Becky then clinches, for a MANHANDLE SLAM through the table!!! Both women are down int he wreckage again, and the count begins! Becky sits up at 4 while fans are still losing their minds! We pass 5 of 10, then 7! Nia sits up at 8 and stands at 9! But then she slumps back over! The count starts again, Nia flounders around and stands at 5. Becky goes up the ladder! Becky sees Nia approaching the desk, and then SUPER MAN’S LEG DROP through the desk!!! The fans lose their minds again while both men are down in more wreckage!

The count is 5 of 10! Becky flounders and crawls, drags herself up at 9, but Nia is still down! BECKY WINS!!

Winner: Becky Lynch

The Man conquers truly one of the most intense challenges in her career! But then here comes one of the most intense champions! The fans fire up as Rhea Ripley makes her way out, Women’s World Championship in hand. She goes right to the ring and looks at Becky. Rhea “congratulates” Becky for winning, but then Becky gets in Rhea’s face! The fans fire up, and now there are no obstacles in the way of Mami VS The Man! Who will be the champion after WrestleMania 40?


My Thoughts:

A great Raw right here, though the in-ring action kinda dipped down until that awesome Last Woman Standing main event. This is one of the times I wish they’d done picture in picture so we as the TV audience could see even more action. Great win for Becky, of course, but I also like that Becky had a moment with Liv just before, and of course she had a moment with Rhea to close out the night. Great promos with Sami and Gable that also blended into the contract signing from tonight. And I suppose Gable has a point that Sami, the comeback kid, can’t do that when Gunther has an arsenal of moves that would be “finishers” given all the different ways Gunther has won over the years.

And speaking of that contract signing segment, I really liked the segue they did in following Sami so that he’d cross paths with Awesome Truth at gorilla and we’d get their segment going into their match. WWE has been doing some really creative stuff in this newest era where Vince is truly out and apparently even Kevin Dunn has moved on. Awesome Truth had a really fun but also really quick tag match with Indus Sher, and then New Day VS Alpha Academy was solid stuff, but DIY VS Creeds was such an awesome match. For a moment, I thought Creeds were gonna take this one but DIY still found a way, and I like that DIY is in. Honestly, I’m liking that the HHH favorites are getting in, because we also have New Catch Republic on the other side that can still win into the match.

Judgment Day had good stuff tonight, too. Good group promo with Andrade to tease El Idolo possibly joining, but who knows if he does. Depends on how things go for Priest. He was watching the qualifiers, he’s not worried, but maybe he should be. Granted, he still has the MITB briefcase, he could go from losing the tag titles to taking the world title, who knows how the Judgment Day’s story is going to go as we move past Mania. Dom VS Ricochet was a really good match, and Ricochet winning was the right move to keep this feud going. I think there’s going to be Ricochet VS McDonagh next week as a rematch from the gauntlet, that’ll be great stuff, too.

Candice’s Heel turn slow burn continues as she takes advantage of the “hurt” leg. Indi also does a good job of being very conflicted about this. There’s a WWE YouTube exclusive where Ivy Nile confronts Candice so that’ll be a match, and then maybe when Candice again goes too far, Indi steps in and we get a match of Candice VS Indi at some point. Good little update promo from CM Punk, he’ll have a great homecoming moment in Chicago, but also probably McIntyre coming after him. McIntyre had a great promo segment with Rollins, and with all these continued moments where the other person gets the mic drop moment, it feels like McIntyre has to win the title.

And of course, great stuff with the Bloodline story even on Raw. Jey and Jimmy have great promos in their confrontation, and of course it turns into a brawl. Good segue from that to Heyman being here, and Heyman confronting Cody during Cody’s great promo segment. Cody really went off on The Rock, that was some wild stuff. But the supposed promise of “one on one and no one else aside from Heyman” might be kept, and we get a strong promo segment on SmackDown in a foreshadowing of the fair-and-square 1v1 match. Or it is a trap and that’s more a foreshadowing of Bloodline Rules where they can do whatever they want. Guess we’ll have to wait and see.

My Score: 8.9/10


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Mitchell’s NJPW New Japan Cup Results & Report! (3/18/24)

The semifinals are here!

Published

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We’re just one step away from the Cup!

Cold Skull faces The Fierce Warrior, and Gene Blast faces The King of Darkness, and when the smoke clears, we will have our New Japan Cup finalists!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Boltin Oleg & Shoma Kato VS Zack Sabre Jr. & Mikey Nicholls; ZSJ & Mikey win.
  • Six Man Tag: El Desperado, Tomohiro Ishii & Togi Makabe VS Just5Guys; Just5Guys win.
  • Tanga Loa & Ryusuke Taguchi VS Great-O-Khan & Callum Newman; Loa & Taguchi win.
  • Six Man Tag: YOSHI-HASHI, Toru Yano & Hiroyoshi Tenzan VS Bullet Club; Bullet Club wins.
  • 8 Man Tag: Shota Umino, El Phantasmo, Hikuleo & YOH VS The House of Torture; Shota, ELP, Leo & Yoh win.
  • Six Man Tag: Los Ingobernables de Japon VS The United Empire; LIJ wins.
  • 2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: Yota Tsuji VS EVIL; Tsuji wins and advances to the finals.
  • 2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: SANADA VS Hirooki Goto; Goto wins and advances to the finals.

PLAY BY PLAY

2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: Yota Tsuji VS EVIL w/ Dick Togo!

The Gene Blast overcame the tricks Ren Narita tried, but that’s because the House of Torture was saving all the good stuff so they could slay the Rampaging Dragon. Will the deck be even more stacked to make sure Everything is Evil’s? Or will Yota be one step away from LIJ VS LIJ at Sakura Genesis?

Well, Dick is making his way out here, but where is Evil? Oh, there he is. No tricks just yet it seems. But then Yota DIVES onto Evil! The fans fire up but Dick attacks Yota! Dick whips, Yota stops himself, and then scoops Dick for a BACKBREAKER! The fans fire up and Yota wants the bell. The ref says yes, ring the bell, and this is on the record! Yota stomps and CLUBS Evil, then whips, but Evil reverses! Yota hits railing, and then Evil whips him into more railing! Evil CHOKES Yota against the railing, Yota fights back, but the ref gets knocked aside! Evil puts Yota in so he and Dick can stomp away!

The fans boo but here comes the rest of the House already! Narita, Yujiro, Kanemaru and Jack all stomp away on Yota, but here come Bushi & Hiromu! It’s a replay of yesterday as LIJ fights off the House, but the numbers are still against them! The ref rushes in to tell everyone to stop! Evil shoves the ref out of the ring, Yota fires off on him, but Evil CLAWS Yota’s eyes! The House CHOKES LIJ, but the ref says stop! The bell rings, but what is the decision!? NO CONTEST!?

No Contest

What does this mean!? Someone has to advance, right? The finals aren’t until the 20th, how can there be a no contest? The House started this, where’re the consequences?! Yota gets up but Evil TOSSES him back out! LIJ regroups and Yota asks for a mic. Yota tells Evil that he’s sick and tired of this! They ARE gonna finish this match! The fans like the sound of that! All the refs come out, including Red Shoes, to discuss how this will be handled. For starters, they tell all the extras to get outta here! LIJ is cool with that, and Hiromu tells the House to come along. Evil says fine, and Jack, Kanemaru, Narita, Yujiro and even Dick reluctantly exit.

The announcement is officially made, and the bell rings! Yota and Evil rush in, Evil kicks low but Yota CLUBS away on Evil! Evil CLAWS the eyes! Evil kicks, runs, RAMS, but Yota rebounds to run Evil over! Then run and SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Yota fires up and the fans are with him! Evil bails out but the fans rally for Yota. Evil wants Yota to stay back, then he slides in, only to slide right out! Yota runs out after Evil, but Evil kicks him! Evil RAMS Yota into the timekeeper! Abe-san and his table go flying! Evil gets the mic to tell Yota that this is what he gets! The fans boo but Evil tells them off, too! Evil stomps Yota then soaks up the heat.

Evil unties the blue buckle pad himself, then waits in the ring. The ref checks Yota and the fans rally up again. The Young Lions help Abe-san while Yota drags himself up. Yota slides in, the fans cheer, but Evil pulls on Yota’s hair! Evil wrenches the hair, then wrenches it again! And again! Evil CLUBS the hair! The ref reprimands but Evil just dusts off his hands. Evil covers, but the ref refuses to count! Evil is furious but he’s the one up to no good! The ref still says no, so Evil stands on Yota’s head. The fans rally up, Yota rises, and he grins as he winds up to ROCK Evil with a forearm! And ROCK him with another!

Yota ROCKS Evil again, but Evil whips him into the bare buckles! Yota falls and the ref reprimands about the missing buckle pad. Evil stomps Yota, covers, TWO! The fans cheer but Evil is annoyed. Evil scuffs Yota, taunts him, and drags him up. Evil CHOPS, Yota drops to his knees, but Evil stands him back up. Evil CHOPS again and Yota grits his teeth as he drops to his knees! Evil stands Yota up again, to fake the chop to CLAW the eyes! The ref reprimands, Evil lets off, and then Evil stands on Yota in a corner. The ref counts, Evil lets go of the ropes but that’s not the problem! Evil steps away, drags Yota up but claims he’s dead weight.

The ref checks, Evil stands Yota up and wrenches an arm. Evil whips Yota into a corner, runs in, but into a BOOT! Evil runs in again, blocks the boot, but Yota brings Evil in for the STOMP! The fans fire up while Yota rests on the mat. The fans rally up and Yota rises again. Evil’s in the corner, runs out, but into the BACKBREAKER! COMPLETE SHOT! STOMP! The fans fire up again as Yota stands back up. Yota runs, to CURB STOMP!! Yota roars and the fans fire up again! Evil flounders while Yota aims. Yota runs in, but the ref is used as a shield! Evil kicks Yota low, then uses the ref in MAGIC KILLER!

All three men are down while the fans rally up again. Evil stands, he brings Yota up, and the ref also rises. Evil whips Yota into the bare buckles, then clotheslines him in! Then FISHERMAN BUSTER! Cover, but Evil lets off?! Evil wants to torture Yota but it’s hard to say if Yota is still even in this. Yota opens his eyes, rises up, but Evil fireman’s carries! DARKNESS FALLS! Cover, TWO!! Yota survives, the fans fire up, but Evil is furious! Evil slashes his throat and vows to end this now! Evil drags Yota up, spins him around, but Yota fights the STO with elbows! Evil kicks low, whips again, but Yota stops from hitting buckles!

Evil runs in, Yota dodges and Evil hits the buckles! SUPERKICK!! Both men are down again and the fans fire back up! We’re only ten minutes into this new match but this is on top of the madness from earlier. Evil drags Yota up, but Yota ROCKS Evil! Evil fights Yota’s fireman’s carry and CLUBS him, but both men wobble. Evil LARIATS, but Yota stays up! The fans fire up but Evil swings to LARIAT again! Yota drops to a knee, but he grins through the pain! Evil says alright, and he throws off his elbow pad. Evil runs to LARIAT! Yota grits his teeth to stay up! V-TRIGGER! Yota brings Evil in, suplexes, ORANGE CRUSH! Cover, TWO!!

Evil is still in this but the fans rally behind Yota again. Yota rises, drags Evil up, and then goes to the corner. Yota goes up and up and Evil moves the ref into the way! The ref takes the FLYING CURB STOMP!!! And now the House returns! The fans boo as Kanemaru, Dick, Yujiro, Narita & Jack all stomp away on Yota again! The fans tell them to go home, again, but these guys don’t care! They just put one out on Yota. They whip Yota to a corner, then DIck runs in to ELBOW! Kanemaru ELBOWS! Yujiro BOOTS! Jack SPLASHES! Narita ELBOWS! Then they snapmare and set Yota up! Dick climbs for the DICK CHOP!!

The fans boo but the House applauds their own dirtiness. But here come Bushi & Hiromu again! But they just get mugged again! They set Hiromu up for the DICK CHOP, while Bushi gets a JACK CHOP! The House then slithers away before a replacement ref rushes out here. Evil drags Yota up, winds up and runs, to LARIAT!! Cover, TWO!!! Yota survives and the fans are thunderous! Evil is at a loss for words, but he slashes his throat! He vows to end it for real, and he reels Yota in. EVERYTHING IS- Yota flips through!? And HEADBUTTS!! The fans fire up as Yota reels Evil in for a fireman’s carry! 70 CROSS!! Cover, TWO!!

Evil survives the swinging spinebuster and the House cheers! Yota drags himself to a corner, drags himself up with the ropes, and roars as he takes aim! Evil rises, but Yujiro distracts! Dick runs in, but gets a V-TRIGGER! The ref sees Dick, but misses the LOW BLOW! Then Evil RAMS Yota into the ref! That’s the second ref this match! Narita gets his push-up bar! The others set Yota up, but here comes SHINGO TAKAGI! The Rampaging Dragon has seen enough, and he’s still pissed from yesterday as it is! He dodges Narita to PUMPING BOMBER! Kanemaru & Yujiro kick Takagi, double whip, but he DOUBLE PUMPING BOMBERS!!

Jack gets in, but he gets ELBOW, JAB and YUKON LARIAT! Evil runs up but Takagi SWATS Evil’s lariat to JAB! Then feed to Hiromu’s SUPERKICK! Hiromu & Takagi set Evil up for Bushi’s BLACK MIST!! Evil can’t see, the PUMPING BOMBER turns him inside-out!! The fans are thunderous as LIJ helps Yota up! Red Shoes hurries out here, and Yota aims at Evil! GENE BLASTER!!! Cover, Yota wins!!!

Winner: Yota Tsuji, by pinfall (advances to the finals)

The House of Torture ran out of tricks, and now there is light at the end of the tournament! Will Yota do LIJ proud and bring home the Cup?

 

2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: SANADA VS Hirooki Goto!

One down, one to go. Yota Tsuji has made it through, now we see who joins him in the finals! Will the Cold Skull or Fierce Warrior be the one that steps closer to former glory?

The bell rings and the fans duel between “GO-TO-O!” and “SA-NA-DA!” Red Shoes measures the levels, and it seems to slightly favor Goto. Goto and Sanada circle, tie up, and are in a deadlock. Goto gets some leverage to put Sanada against ropes, but he lets off slowly. Goto pats Sanada on the shoulders and the fans cheer. The two reset, circle again, and tie up again. It’s another deadlock, but again Goto finds a way to put Sanada on ropes. Sanada turns things around, lets off slowly, and also pats Goto on the shoulders. The fans applaud and the two reset again. They feel things out, knuckle lock, then move to a clinch.

They fight for control, Sanada starts pushing Goto towards a corner but Goto slips away. They feel things out, knuckle lock again, then break. They tie up collar ‘n’ elbow, Goto waistlocks, but Sanada wrenches to wristlock. Goto rolls, wrenches, wristlocks, but Sanada spins, wrenches, only for Goto to roll! Goto gets a leg to trip Sanada up, and he has a toehold. Sanada fights back with a chinlock but Goto pulls on the leg. Sanada uses his free leg to hook Goto into an ARMBAR, but Goto clasps hands! Goto moves around, pops free, then headlocks. Sanada fights up, Goto grinds the headlock, but Sanada throws body shots.

Sanada powers up and out, but Goto runs him over! The fans rally as things speed up, and Goto counters hip toss with hip toss! Goto runs and he clotheslines Sanada up and out! The fans fire up and Goto slides out after Sanada. Goto stomps Sanada, drags him up, then CLUBS him on the neck! Sanada staggers, Goto CHOPS him, then kicks him, then CLUBS him! Goto whips but Sanada stops himself from hitting railing! Goto runs in but Sanada drop toeholds him into the railing! Goto goes down in a heap, but Sanada opens the gate. Sanada brings Goto through, then to the crowd! PILEDRIVER to the bare floor!

The fans are stunned but Red Shoes reprimands. Sanada leaves Goto behind and slides into the ring. The fans rally for Goto as the ring count begins. Goto crawls at 5 of 20, finds his way to ringside at 10, but still hobbles and crawls. He stands at 17 to slide in! The fans cheer, but Sanada stomps Goto. Sanada drags Goto up, CLUBS him on the neck, then brings him back up to CLUB him again. Goto CHOPS! And CHOPS! Sanada eggs Goto on so Goto CHOPS again! Goto whips, Sanada reverses to RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Cover, TWO! Sanada keeps cool and sits Goto up into a chinlock. Goto endures and the fans rally again.

Goto kicks forward, reaches out, but Sanada cranks on the hold! Goto keeps fighting, and has the ROPEBREAK! Sanada lets go cleanly, but then he stomps Goto while he’s down. Sanada then stands Goto up to CLUB him on the neck. Goto CHOPS in return! And CHOPS, and CHOPS, and has Sanada in a corner! Goto CHOPS again, then whips corner to corner. Goto runs in, but Sanada BOOTS first! Sanada runs, Goto follows, and Goto LARIATS Sanada down! The fans fire up and Goto rises, clutching his neck. Goto stands Sanada up to fire off forearms, then he whips corner to corner. Goto runs in, MURAMASA!

Sanada wobbles, into the SAIDO! Cover, TWO! The fans fire up while Goto grits his teeth. Goto drags Sanada up, fireman’s carries, but Sanada fights free! Sanada waistlocks, Goto throws elbows, then runs. Sanada hurdles, hurdles, and DROPKICKS! Goto tumbles out of the ring, Sanada PLANCHAS him down! The fans fire up and Sanada encourages them to get louder. The fans get louder and Sanada appreciates it. Sanada then goes back for Goto, brings him up and puts him in the ring. Sanada fireman’s carries but Goto throws elbows! Sanada turns around into Goto’s fireman’s carry, but then slips out into the dragon sleeper!

But Goto arm-drags free! Sanada kicks low, runs, but Goto follows! Sanada dodges this time, runs again, but Goto still follows! Sanada sidesteps this time, but Goto holds ropes to avoid the hurdle! Goto runs in, but Sanada fireman’s carries! T K O! Cover, TWO! Goto is still in this and the fans rally up! Sanada goes up the corner, ROUNDING BODY- NO, Sanada has to land out as Goto moves! Sanada runs in, but into the fireman’s carry! USHIGOROSHI! Both men are down and the fans fire up again! They cheer on “GO-TO-O!” but the “SA-NA-DA!” chants are still there. Red Shoes checks them both, and both men slowly rise.

The two crawl towards each other, and Goto fires a forearm! Sanada shakes his head, eggs Goto on, so Goto throws another! Goto eggs Sanada on, so Sanada fires a forearm! Goto fires a forearm back, and the two stand. Sanada UPPERCUTS! Goto comes back to forearm! Sanada UPPERCUTS again, and Goto drops back to a knee! The fans rally, Goto stands again, and he forearms! UPPERCUT, forearm, repeat! Goto growls, fires a flurry of forearms, and he ROCKS Sanada! Sanada drops to his hand and knees but Goto powers up! Goto KICKS but Sanada blocks! Goto fires more forearms, then waistlocks, but Sandaa fights free!

Sanada runs, but Goto fireman’s carries! And he throws Sanada into the dragon sleeper! But Sanada turns around and suplexes, for MAGIC SCREW! Both men are down again and the fans fire back up! Sanada roars as he rises up, and he aims from a corner. Sanada wants Goto to get up, and Goto sits up, into the SHINING WIZARD! Sanada then dragon sleepers, for the SKULL END!! Goto endures, flails, reaches out, but he’s caught in the body scissors! Goto fights around but he’s fading! The fans rally, Goto’s hand drops! Sanada lets him go to then climb! ROUNDING BODY PRESS! Cover, TWO!!

The fans fire up as Goto survives but Sanada storms around. Sanada drags Goto up, reels him in and clinches, but Goto slips free to shove Sanada away! Sanada forearms, ROLLING- HEADBUTT from Goto! The fans fire up and duel, and Goto drags Sanada up. But Sanada breaks free! Goto HEADBUTTS again! Sanada falls back down and Goto steadies himself. Goto roars, the fans are with him, and Goto sits Sanada up. Goto runs to PENALTY KICK! Shoutout to Shibata and the fans fire up more! Sanada grits his teeth as he sits back up but Goto takes aim! BUZZSAW! And then he hauls Sanada up to dragon sleeper! G T- BACKSLIDE COUNTER! TWO!!!

Sanada and Goto hurry up, Sanada dodges to O’Conner BRIDGE!! TWO?!!? Goto escapes and shocks everyone! Sanada resets, runs in, SHINING WIZARD!! The fans are thunderous as Sanada roars and drags Goto back up! Clinch and DEAD- NO, Goto slips around to ripcord and fireman’s carry! G T W!! Cover, TWO?!?!? Sanada survives but Goto is all fired up! The fans are thunderous as Goto dragon sleepers for G T R!!! Cover, GOTO WINS!!!

Winner: Hirooki Goto, by pinfall (advances to the finals)

Don’t call it a comeback, Goto’s been here for years! Sanada’s hopes of being IWGP World Heavyweight Champion again have been delayed, how long must he wait for another chance?

As for Goto, he’s going back to the New Japan Cup Finals for the first time since 2016, and his seventh overall! But before he can get the mic to speak, Yota makes his way back out here. Yota steps into the ring and he gets the mic first. Yota tells Goto, “In order to open the door to a new era, we must do this.” The fans applaud that, and Yota continues by asking Goto, “Are you ready?!” Yota drops the mic at Goto’s feet, and Goto stands up to speak. “I also have something I want to show you. As a three-time New Japan Cup Champion, I will show you my strength.” The fans like the sound of that!

The Fierce Warrior stares down with Gene Blast, a true generational showdown on the horizon! Will Goto return not juts to former glory, but finally ascend to top of NJPW? Or will Yota make it LIJ VS LIJ for the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship?


My Thoughts:

A great semifinal round for this tournament, with quite a surprising main event. Sanada VS Goto was great stuff, and while I felt Sanada wasn’t winning the Cup, I didn’t think he’d be out this round. Yota VS Evil was rather creatively put together, too. I did not think the House would get so involved that at first it was a No Contest but then they restart under a ringside ban. Takagi making sure Yota won was good stuff, too, maybe we can get Takagi VS Evil for the NEVER Openweight Championship if they’re not gonna circle back to more Shota Umino VS House of Torture stuff.

Goto VS Yota is going to be great stuff, and Goto is clearly a top utility guy. He’s had so many New Japan Cup finals appearances, certainly among the most ever, but I don’t think he gets a fourth Cup win against Yota, one of the “new era Musketeers” that NJPW clearly loves. Yota VS Naito is definitely the title match for Sakura Genesis.

My Score: 8.9/10


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