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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Live Report! (6/5/18)

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SmackDown GM, champion and challenger!

The Phenomenal One and the King of Strong Style will sign thee contract for their Last Man Standing WWE Championship match at Money in the Bank, with SmackDown GM Paige presiding! Plus, the FABULOUS Carmella promises to reveal all about her opponent, The Empress of Tomorrow, Asuka, before their own title match at Money in the Bank!

 

All images courtesy of the WWE’s official Twitter

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • 2v1 Handicap: Asuka VS Mandy Rose & Sonya Deville; Asuka wins.
  • Harper w/ Rowan VS Karl Anderson w/ Luke Gallows; Anderson wins.
  • Mixed Tag: Naomi & Jimmy Uso w/ Jey Uso VS Lana & Aiden English; Naomi & Jimmy win.
  • Charlotte Flair VS Becky Lynch; Becky wins.
  • Six Man Tag: The New Day VS The Miz, Rusev & Samoa Joe; The New Day wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

The SmackDown Women’s Champion, Carmella, heads to the ring.

The FABULOUS Princess of Staten Island faces the Empress of Tomorrow at Money in the Bank, but the champion doesn’t seem afraid at all. Carmella welcomes Corpus Christi and demands they give her praise. When they boo, she accepts that. This isn’t about her, this is about Asuka. Carmella wants the world to know the truth about Asuka. Asuka is not who we think she is. Carmella shows us the Asuka we do know, that we love yet fear. A highlight reel rolls, covering her career from NXT where she would be the undefeated Woman’s Champion for almost two years, and then shifting to her Streak continuing on Raw. Carmella gives Asuka credit at being incredible, poised and terrifying.

But “let’s remove the mask” and face the truth: “This is the real Asuka.” The highlight reel continues, and Asuka would lose for the first time in the WWE to Charlotte. But then, it continues to show that The IIconics would beat Asuka in a tag team match, and then Sonya Deville would easily ambush Asuka from behind. Mandy Rose would also dominate in her match with Asuka because of it, but it ignores how Asuka still won that match. Carmella says that was all “painful to watch.” But it’s the truth: Asuka’s first loss devastated her. That’s why Carmella isn’t afraid. #MellaIsMoney! But fans boo as Carmella says Asuka’s time is over. Asuka was undefeated but now she’s just defeated. No One is Ready has become Everyone Is Ready. Even the WWE Universe is ready for Asuka! Raise your hand if you’re ready for Asuka!

Speak of Asuka, and here she comes! Carmella stays cool, even as Asuka enters the ring. Asuka herself is still in a good mood. But then Mandy Rose and Sonya Deville appear?

Carmella didn’t need to go through all that trouble. Mandy Rose knows herself that Asuka is a shadow of her former self. Asuka still won, but Mandy is confident she was close to winning. Mandy knows she can beat Asuka tonight! Sonya says Mandy did what she had to: left Asuka for Sonya. Sonya wants her turn to face Asuka! Carmella agrees with them both, so who will it be? The Undefeated Asuka would fight both, but the Defeated Asuka should just call an Uber and get out. But then SmackDown GM Paige appears!

The Glampire in Chief says no one speaks for her. Paige makes matches, not them. Asuka does have unfinished business with Sonya and Mandy. Who does Asuka choose? Asuka grins at them both before snatching the mic from Carmella. “Give me both!!”

In that case, it will be Asuka VS Sonya & Mandy in a Handicap Match, up next! Can the Empress reclaim her glory against the duo formerly known as Absolution?

 

2v1 Handicap: Asuka VS Mandy Rose & Sonya Deville!

SmackDown returns to this match at the bell, and Sonya starts with Asuka. The Gladiator Gal lunges but the Empress avoids. The Princess has joined commentary while Asuka gives a test kick at Sonya. Asuka and Sonya tie up, and Asuka puts Sonya in a corner. Mandy tags in, and fans cheer for God’s Greatest Creation. Mandy trise to power Asuka to the corner but asuka throws her off. Sonya tags back in and she circles with Asuka again. They tie up, Asuka wrenches the arm to a wristlock, but Sonya reverses. Asuka reverses back but Sonya forearms out to then waistlock and throw Asuka down. Asuka reverses to a kneebar, but Sonya ropebreaks. Carmella keeps boasting about herself while Asuka and Sonya tie up again.

Asuka trips Sonya, things speed up and Sonya hip tosses Asuka. Sonya runs but Asuka avoids the sliding knee, and Asuka dropkicks Sonya in return. Asuka is fired up but Mandy distracts. Sonya sucker punches Asuka, then asks “Who do you think you are?!” Fans boo Sonya while cheering Asuka. Sonya throws hands on Asuka then tags Mandy. Mandy stomps a mudhole into Asuka, then embraces the heat. Mandy tags Sonya, and they mug Asuka again. Sonya stalks Asuka at the ropes, then puts her back in the corner to tag in Mandy. Sonya rams in shoulders, then Mandy rams hers in. Mandy throws forearms but backs off at the ref’s count. Mandy snapmares Asuka into a chinlock while fans keep rallying. Carmella is more worried about her hair than what Asuka will do to her.

Asuka endures the chinlock, then fights back, but Mandy throws her down. Cover, TWO, but Mandy goes back to the chinlock. Fans rally while Asuka gets up and fights back again. Asuka powers out and collides with Mandy. Asuka fires up, then speeds up to hip attack Mandy! Mandy gets to a corner but gets another hip attack. Asuka tosses Mandy out to then climb up top. Asuka aims, and hits the missile dropkick! Carmella distracts Asuka, Sonya tags in and then clobbers Asuka! Sonya digs her knee into Asuka while Carmella moonwalks on the announce desk. The champ has handed the match to Sonya while we go picture in picture.

Sonya chokes Asuka at the ropes while Carmella keeps dancing. Sonya drags Asuka up and snapmares her, to then slide into a bodyscissor hold. Asuka endures as Sonya adds a chinlock. Asuka pushes back to a cover, TWO and they separate. Sonya spinebusters Asuka! Cover, TWO, but Sonya keeps her cool. Mandy tags in, and they both stand on Asuka’s chest. Mandy drags Asuka over and hammers away. She drags Asuka into an arm wrench and adds a chinbar for a unique abdominal stretch. Asuka endures, even as Mandy also pulls hair. Asuka fights out, then fires off kicks, but Mandy catches one to throw Asuka with an exploder! Cover, TWO, and Mandy grows frustrated. Mandy toys with Asuka, then rains down more rights.

Mandy stalks Asuka at the ropes, then chokes her at the ropes. She brings Asuka back over and tags Sonya. Mandy stomps away, then Sonya adds kicks. Sonya tags back to Mandy, and Mandy brings Asuka up with the butterfly underhook. Asuka fights her way out then rolls Mandy, TWO, so Asuka hits Sonya then shining wizard to Mandy! Asuka is still catching her breath but she’s not giving up. She and Mandy trade forearms on their knees while we go single picture. They go back and forth as they stand up, but Asuka ducks to then dropkick Mandy! Asuka spins Mandy around for a German Suplex! Carmella is still calm while Mandy elbows Asuka. Sonya tags in but Mandy gets kicked down. Sonya gets the pop-up knee, then the hip attack! Cover, but Mandy breaks it.

Asuka grabs Mandy and tosses her out, but Sonya rolls Asuka up! TWO, and they go roundhouse for roundhouse, double roundhouses!

Both women are down and a ten count begins. Carmella is still not worried, as the count reaches 8! Asuka and Sonya stagger up at 9, but then Sonya runs into a knee! But Sonya fires up and SPEARS Asuka! Cover, TWO! Sonya can’t believe Asuka survived. She covers again, TWO, and now Sonya grows frustrated. Sonya gives knee after knee to Asuka, in return for Asuka’s knee. Sonya runs, but into an arm-lock! She manages to reverse but Asuka reverses, and the Asuka Lock is in! Sonya taps, Asuka wins!

Winner: Asuka, by submission

The Empress defeats two opponents at once, yet Carmella is smugly unafraid. Carmella says “enough is enough”, and goes into the ring with Asuka. She holds up her belt but Asuka still grins. Mandy returns, but Asuka back fists her away! Carmella clubs Asuka from behind! Carmella stalks Asuka, and hits the FABULOUS Kick. The Champion is all smiles now, and vows #MellaintheBank will be her PPV. Are her calculations correct? Or will Asuka show Carmella that her math means NOTHING in regards to the Empress?

 

The Miz trains backstage.

But Mr. Bootyworth is there? And so are The New Day! Hokage Miz, they want to apologize for their jerkish behavior. Miz just wanted to know which member enters the MITB match. They are taking this seriously. And it’s because it was thanks to him giving them a Reality Check. The New Day know the truth hurts, and admit it’s been very hard to decide. Therefore, they want Miz to help them reveal their member to the world. What’s the catch? No catch, just names in a hat. Put your hand in the hat and pull out a name. Then “ya bois” will be Misters Money in the Bank. Miz agrees, and reaches in, but they want him to wait. No peeking. Headband down as a blindfold and… Hat swap! It’s not names, it’s pancake batter!

This won’t be so funny when Samoa Joe puts Woods to Sleep, Rusev MACHKA Kicks Kofi, and Miz beats Big E again! Miz then wipes the batter off on Bootyworth’s shirt. Who will get the last laugh in tonight’s Six Man Tag?

 

Harper w/ Rowan VS Karl Anderson w/ Luke Gallows!

These two pairs of brothers in battle will battle 2v2 at MITB for the SmackDown Tag Team Championships in two weeks. As for tonight, it’s 1v1 as the Machine Gun tries his hand against Harper. The bell rings and Harper dropkicks Anderson right away! Harper uppercuts and scrapes Anderson’s face, then puts him in a corner. The fans chant “Too Sweet!” for Anderson but Harper keeps on him with clubbing forearms, and a running elbow into the back. Cover, ONE, but Harper drags Anderson up to uppercut him into a corner. Harper chops Anderson, then stalks him, before standing on Anderson’s head. He rakes the eyes, then uppercuts Anderson again. Anderson gets to ropes, but Harper palm strikes him to a corner. Harper backs Gallows off, then whips Anderson, for the scrapbuster!

Anderson writhes but Harper isn’t done with him. Harper puts Anderson in another corner, but Anderson kicks back! Harper uppercuts again, but misses the superkick. Anderson rolls Harper up, ANDERSON WINS!

Winner: Anderson, by pinfall

The Good Brothers sneak one! The Machine Gun ends the insane win streak Harper has been on since returning. Can Gallows & Anderson combine for another miracle like this and take those titles from the Bludgeon Brothers?

 

Jimmy Uso & Naomi speak.

Lana tried to bust a move and a little bit more last week. That won’t happen at MITB, because Naomi will snatch Lana bald and snatch the contract. As for tonight, this husband-wife combo shows why they’re the ones who really run SmackDown. #WelcometotheUsoPenitentiary.

 

Mixed Tag: Naomi & Jimmy Uso w/ Jey Uso VS Lana & Aiden English!

Corpus Christi, it’s #GlowTime as Naomi and Jimmy bring back their Mixed Match Challenge combination to take on the Ravishing Russian and not her husband. The founding father of Rusev Day is busy with his own tag match later, so MC Artiste takes over. “Our opponents want to glow inside a penitentiary, but they’re about to face the loss of the century.” And when it’s done, everyone know why Lana is the best, Lana number one!

The bell rings and the men start. Jimmy and English circle, then tie up. English gets the headlock, and sings “Rusev Daaay~”. Jimmy powers out but English reverses, only for Jimmy to uppercut him away. English is in fear for his moneymaker throat, and he has Lana help check on him. English is fine, but then they run into double enziguri from Uso & Naomi! They end up outside, so Jimmy holds the ropes for Naomi to FLY!

The #UceGlow is in control while we go to break.

SmackDown returns, and Lana begs Naomi not kick her. Naomi spins Lana, and kicks and kicks, but Lana ducks them each time, so Naomi throws in an knee! Lana goes down, and Naomi steps at English. English panics, but Lana pounces. Lana gives Naomi a kick, then covers, TWO. English coaches Lana on and Lana vows she is number one. Lana chokes Naomi at the ropes, then backs up at 4. She runs and hits double knees, then covers. TWO, and Lana grows frustrated. Lana brings Naomi into her corner for a boot grind, but stops at 4. Fans rally for Naomi as Lana bounces her off the match. Lana puts Naomi in an armlock, adding a chinbar. Naomi endures while fans duel and rally. Naomi sits up but Lana pushes her into buckles! Lana boasts while Naomi recovers. Lana says “Uce! NO!” but Naomi dropkicks her down!

Naomi crawls for Jimmy but Lana tackles her down! Lana drags Naomi away and drops elbows. Cover, TWO, and Lana grows frustrated. Lana puts Naomi back in the armlock and chinbar. Fans rally again and Naomi fights her way up and out. Naomi jawbreakers, but Lana keeps her away from Jimmy. Naomi tugs Lana back and reaches for Jimmy, but Lana grabs hair. Lana gets rolled up, TWO, double clotheslines take them both out! Fans rally again as they crawl, hot tag to Jimmy! The men both come in and Jimmy rallies on English! Jimmy kicks low then uppercuts, and English again worries about his throat. English avoids the Samoan Drop but not the dragon whip kick! Jimmy fires up and hits the hip attack in the corner! Cover, but Lana breaks it just in time. Lana SLAPS Jimmy, but Naomi alley-oops to tackle Lana!

The women roll out of the ring, but English back splashes Jimmy. Jimmy is down in a corner, and English says “RUS-ev Day!” He runs corner to corner but Noami FLIES in to crossbody! Then SUPERKICK from Jimmy! Cover, Uso & Naomi win!

Winners: Uso & Naomi, Jimmy Uso pinning

The husband-wife combo succeeds! This gives Naomi big momentum towards the Women’s MITB match, but will she or Lana be able to overcome a star-studded field of eight?

 

SmackDown GM Paige is backstage for the WWE Championship contract signing.

She thanks the challenger and champion for being present at the table. Shinsuke Nakamura and AJ Styles sit across from each other, with security on hand just in case. Their match will be Last Man Standing, meaning one man wins when the other cannot stand after a count of 10. There will be a winner this time, but are their questions? Styles has more of a statement. Styles and Shinsuke have been warring forever. Shinsuke played his games, drove Styles to the edge, but Styles understands why. “Because you know straight up, you can’t beat me.” It’s why Nakamura plays around and chose such a match type. But every dirty trick Nakamura has won’t work this time. Styles vows to walk and walk out WWE Champion.

Without any further comment, Paige has them sign the contract. Styles signs first. Nakamura claims the pen is out of ink. He wants to borrow Styles’. Styles gives him the pen, and Nakamura examines it. Nakamura claims the pen is broken. Styles gets pissed, he wants Nakamura to sign it already! Nakamura keeps playing his games, but then Styles SLAPS him!

Styles is accompanied out of the room, and Nakamura reveals he had a back-up pen. Nakamura signs, and the match is made. “Last Man Standing”, Nakamura likes the sound of that. But will he like what Styles does to him when there are no rules but to win?

 

Charlotte Flair VS Becky Lynch!

While these two are the SmackDown half of the WWE Four Horsewomen, while these two are friends and love having tea time, these two are former SmackDown Women’s Champions and they both want that title back. The first step to that is winning the MITB contract, which both of them also want. The Queen of Flair is up 4-3 in their all-time series, but can the Lass Kicker tie it up here tonight?

The bell rings and the two circle. They tie up, and Becky arm-drags Charlotte away. Becky grins as they circle and go again. Becky reverses Charlotte’s’ attempt but Charlotte throws Becky out. Charlotte lets Becky return, then gets the takedown. Becky denies the figure four but Charlotte denies the Disarm-her, so Becky settles for a headlock. Charlotte stands up and pries her way out, to put on a headlock. Becky powers out, but Charlotte handsprings over her. Things speed up and Chalrotte headscissors Becky to the ropes. The fans “WOO~!” as the two friend stare down. Charlotte gets a takedown but Becky slips out of the cover to roll Charlotte, TWO. Charlotte tries to roll Becky, but then Becky gets the ropebreak. Fans are dueling, and the friends clink glasses for tea time.

But then they both kick! They both block, too, and tell the other to let go.

They agree to let go together, and they do. The friends back off and fans applaud, but then things start up again, double crossbodies take them both out! Both women are down while we go picture in picture. Charlotte and Becky stand but Charlotte is on Becky first. Becky jawbreakers and dropkicks, then drops the leg. Becky drops the elbow, then runs to drop the other leg, but Charlotte dodges. Charlotte puts Becky in the headscissor hold and rams Becky’s head into the mat over and over. Charlotte squeezes Becky, but Becky endures. Becky stands up but Charlotte throws her around with the headscissors. Charlotte holds on, and grabs at legs for a cover, TWO.

Charlotte keeps on Becky but Becky reverses the whip to arm-drag Charlotte. Becky arm-drags her again and into an armlock, holding Charlotte down. Charlotte endures the stretch as well as that knee in her face. She moves around but Becky shifts to a bridging armbar! Charlotte endures and Becky stops the bridge while we go single picture. Fans duel while Charlotte gets up. Becky keeps the arm but Charlotte throws forearms. Becky responds, then runs, but into Charlotte’s tilt-o-whirl. She slips through but Charlotte denies the arm submission. Charlotte chops and chops away, but then Becky dodges to give a European Uppercut. Becky gives more EuroUppers, but Charlotte backslides. TWO, and Charlotte chops Becky off her feet. Charlotte gives Becky a back suplex and fires up with a kip-up.

Charlotte runs but into Becky’s boot. Becky jump kicks, then climbs up again, but Charlotte stops her. Charlotte drags Becky out for a crucifix backbreaker, cover, TWO. Charlotte goes for but Becky denies the figure four, then Becky clobbers Charlotte with a flying forearm. Becky fires up while climbing up, for a big leg drop! Cover, TWO! Fans keep dueling, and Becky stalks Charlotte. Charlotte rolls up the hold, TWO, and Becky throws forearms. Becky runs, Charlotte follows, SPEAR! Becky rolls out of the ring, but Charlotte slingshots out! Charlotte takes Becky down, “That’s why I’m the Queen!” Charlotte puts Becky back in the ring, then climbs up top… MOONSAULT! But into knees! Becky small package, TWO.

Charlotte takes Becky down but Becky denies her again. Charlotte comes back and gets part, but Becky counters! Becky gets the Disarm-her!! Charlotte taps, Becky wins!!

Winner: Becky, by submission

The Lass Kicker ties their series, 4-4! But more importantly, this close to MITB, Charlotte is on the downtrend while Becky’s on fire. Becky helps her friend to her feet, and fans cheer for their sportsmanship. Friendship aside, will Becky or Charlotte be the one to climb the ladder and win the golden opportunity? Or will a woman from Raw ruin their chances?

 

Backstage interview with Samoa Joe.

The Destroyer is in the Men’s MITB, but he wants to know what people see when they look at him. Is he vicious? Is he a rabid dog? Or is he a man with a skewed moral compass? Tonight, The New Day learn that all those things are true. Joe is a bit saddened by his own reputation, because what he really wants people to think is that he is a man who keeps his promises. He promised to put Daniel Bryan to sleep, and he did. But he also promised to climb up and grab the briefcase. Joe did that, as a preview of what he wants to do at MITB. SmackDown’s roster trembled because they witnesses the future. And whoever is unfortunate enough to become WWE Champion will know “what you see is what you get.” And soon, everyone will get it.

 

On-stage interview with Big Cass.

The Human Skyscraper is all smiles as he makes his way out to join Renee Young. Cass will get a rematch with Daniel Bryan at Money in the Bank. What will he do to win this time? “Look at how high up you have to hold up that microphone.” Cass is 7 feet tall, while Bryan is maybe an inch taller than Renee. Big Cass has a little story for Bryan. Backstage at Wrestlemania 30, Cass walked down the hall and into the locker room. He was behind Daniel Bryan, who won the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. All Cass could think was, “Seriously?” This little guy is THE WWE Champion? Cass claims Bryan’s win was a fluke, as was the win over Cass at Backlash.

But Cass will give credit, Bryan packs a heck of a punch for such someone so “petite.” “A good big man will beat a good little man.” If no one believes Cass, just look at the footage. Samoa Joe put Bryan to sleep in last week’s triple threat. Then, Cass waited for Bryan to stand, and he booted him back down! Cass almost feels bad about that. Almost. But Bryan asked to get back in the ring, but little did he know, a 7 foot shadow would follow him. Bryan has never been in the ring with someone as big as Cass, as educated as Cass, or as big a star as Cass. Cass guarantees 100% that Bryan has never, ever been int he ring that holds a grudge like Cass.

Cass vows to do everything he can to dismantle, beat and embarrass Bryan! “Daniel Bryan, I’m going to take your scrawny little arms, rip them off your body, and beat you over the head with them”. Then he’ll snap those little legs like twigs so that Bryan can never put submission holds on again. Bryan needs to go do what he does best: playing a little garden gnome on Total Bellas. After MITB, Bryan will be beaten and battered, and then come to a slow realization that “a pathetic little man like him, will never survive in this Big Man’s world.” Cass is confident that size matters, but will Bryan get the better of him in their rematch from Backlash?

 

Backstage interview with Sin Cara.

The luchador from El Paso was snubbed by Andrade Almas and Zelina Vega. Was he wrong about how close he and Almas are? Sin Cara has known Almas since Almas was 14 years old, they were like brothers. But something happened. Something? Vega is not just something, she is the best thing to ever happen to Almas. When he had Sin Cara as a role model, he had nothing. Sin Cara had Almas hide behind a mask. Sin Cara made him weak. Almas learned he doesn’t have to hide, and he doesn’t have to be afraid. Especially not of Sin Cara. Sin Cara says that’s not true, but Vega counters that Almas wants a match with Sin Cara. Almas then clobbers Sin Cara from outta nowhere! Almas throws Sin Cara into a trunk, then calls him a dog. Will El Idolo pay for turning on an amigo like that?

 

Six Man Tag: The New Day VS The Miz, Rusev & Samoa Joe!

Awwwww Corpus Christi~! Don’t you dare be sour, clap for the world famous four time champs and feel~, the powah~! Positive energy and plenty of pancakes accompany Woods, Kofi & Big E, but they still haven’t told us who–who who who?–will enter the Men’s MITB on behalf of the team. Will the trio keep the secret and keep momentum against the A-Lister, the Bulgarian Brute and the Destroyer?

Miz is very fired up as he starts with Woods, and he throws hands and kicks on Woods in a corner. He taunts fans who want pancakes, then whips Woods corner to corner. Woods goes up and over then speeds things up as he dodges Miz, to then hit Miz with a roaring elbow! Cover, TWO, so Woods keeps on Miz with a EuroUpper. Woods snapmares Miz to then tag in Kofi. Kofi hits the running kick, Woods adds the sliding lariat, then Kofi adds the splash while Woods hops up. Woods hits the elbow drop, then tags Big E, for the Big Splash! Cover, TWO, but The New Day keep their cool. Miz rolls away and tags in Joe, for a first time meeting between truly big superstars. Joe jabs away on Big E, but then runs into Big E’s belly2belly!

Big E tags in Woods to drop hands on Joe. Woods chops, then runs, and hits Miz, but Joe hits Woods with the back elbow and Pele! Joe’s team takes control while we go to break.

SmackDown returns one more time, and Woods is isolated as Miz tags in. Miz snapmares and puts on a chinlock, but fans rally for Woods. Woods stands up and reaches, but Miz wrangles him back down. Miz grins as he squeezes Woods, but fans rally with “New! Day Rocks!” Woods stands up again, and fights out of the hold. Miz whips and hits Woods with the kitchen sink knee. Miz then puts Woods in a corner and hoists him up top. He climbs up to join Woods, but Woods denies the superplex. Woods fights back and knocks Miz down, to then adjust and hit a missile dropkick! Fans rally again, but Miz tags Joe first. Joe swings at Big E, but then Rusev pounces and puts Big E into steel steps!

Woods kicks Joe, then shining wizard! Woods and Joe are down, but crawling for their corners. Joe tags Miz, Woods tags Kofi! Kofi springboards and rallies, hitting Miz with double chops and a dropkick. Kofi keeps moving but Miz dodges to then whip, only for Kofi to use that for a crossbody! Cover, TWO, and Kofi goes for SOS. Miz pushes him away but Kofi rebounds with a leaping lariat! Kofi fires up, and hits the “New Day~” Boom Drop! Fans fire up as Kofi claps. Kofi aims at Miz, but Joe returns. Kofi hits him first, but Miz hits Kofi with the low DDT! Cover, TWO! Miz is shocked, but keeps focus as he brings Kofi up. Miz wants the Finale but Kofi arm-drags. Rusev tags in, Kofi dodges Miz, but Rusev suplexes Kofi. Kofi lands on his feet, Big E tags in!

Rusev runs into boots, then Big E’s overhead belly2belly! Big E runs, but into a knee and a roundhouse! Joe tags in, Rusev feeds him to the “Sit down!” Yurinagi! Cover, but Woods breaks it! Rusev goes after Woods but Woods dumps him out. Woods fires up, and FLIES! They go down, but Joe tags Miz. Miz whips Joe, but Kofi and Big E dump him out. Miz goes after E, but Kofi springboards to Trust Fall onto Joe! Big E throws Miz out to DIVE THROUGH HIM!

Big E hurries and puts Miz back in, then brings those straps down. Fans fire up as Kofi tags in, but Joe goes around to trip up Woods! Joe puts on the Coquina, and then MACHKA Kick takes out Kofi! Big E runs into a post, and Miz coordinates with the others. Joe and Rusev come around while Miz gets the pancakes?

Miz’s prediction has been right up to this point, and now he wants to humiliate Big E via pancakes. Kofi fails to make the save, but then Miz throws the pancakes at the wrong people! MACHKA Kick for Miz, and the back senton from Joe! Joe and Rusev ditch Miz, so the New Day regroups. Big E tags back in, he and Kofi hit Miz with the Midnight Hour! Cover, the New Day win!

Winners: The New Day, Big E pinning

We still don’t know who who who joins the Men’s MITB match, but ya bois still have the momentum. Whichever member it is, will they be the one to make the entire team the joint Misters Money in the Bank?

 


 

My Thoughts:

SmackDown was MUCH better than Raw last night. Raw may have had entertaining moments, but there were flaws to most of what they did. SmackDown made sure every moment was great and pushed the story along in some way. Granted, Carmella’s opening segment did the same as Raw’s: it made a match happen. But the match that came out of it was more compelling as Asuka uses the duo formerly known as Absolution to build great momentum, yet also helped give Mandy & Sonya more credibility. Carmella is doing great as her falsely confident self, and I’m betting something happens on next week’s go-home to snap her back to reality.

Is Hell freezing over? WWE just let Karl Anderson win, 1v1, and clean. I still don’t think The Club beat The Bludgeon Brothers at MITB, but I hope The Club finally get to bring out more of that real ability. Jimmy & Naomi got to show their ability as a mixed tag team, I wonder if it’d be easier to make a mixed tag division instead of a women’s tag. That WWE Championship contract signing was uniquely done, and it worked out. That slap from Styles was impressive, too. Their match can still go either way, but with how in control Nakamura is, he might be getting a 51% edge. Cass’ promo made his point, and Almas’ attack on Sin Cara was well-planned, they’re both making progress. I’m glad Sin Cara is back on TV, even if it’s for someone else’s benefit in kayfabe.

Charlotte VS Becky was amazing. It was a bit shy of my hoped-for 20 minutes but it was definitely worthy of stars like them. It’d be great for Becky to be the second-ever Ms. MITB, but even if she doesn’t win it, the story of her dealing with another disappointment could be what she needs to reach the title without the contract. In essence, she could go through what Daniel Bryan did: finally win the title, only for the cash-in to take it all away. The Six Man Tag was pretty good, and it helps tie in the New Day’s story of keeping their entrant a secret. I almost thought Miz and team were going to win as Miz predicted, but the fever pitch of that crowd, The New Day had to win.

My Score: 8.5/10


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Coverage

Andrew’s IMPACT Results & Match Ratings: 2.2.2023

Impact has a new number one contender, a few new signings and setting up for No Surrender. Lets see what happens tonight!

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We’re coming off of Rich Swann becoming the number one contender, Joe Hendry creating another banger of a parody song and Bully Ray…being more like Bitchy Ray.

Also lets not overlook the fact that Dirty Dango officially signed with IMPACT as well. Which may not be huge, but with the current addition of Santino Marella, Dango being involved in storylines for the foreseeable; there could be some good comedy in store.

There we go, a bunch of stuff got set in motion; but we could always see some interesting wrinkles or just straight forward boredom. Only one way to find out! BUT FIRST! Raven is getting The Flock back together…maybe?

Ratings:

  • Bullet Club (Ace & Bey) vs Kevin Knight & Kushida: Ace & Bey win via 1-2-Sweet – ***
  • Gisele Shaw w/Jai Vidal vs Savannah Evans: Gisele wins via Denouement – ** 1/4
  • Crazzy Steve w/ Black Taurus vs Sheldon Jean: Steve wins via King Kill 33 – N/A
  • Johnny Swinger w/Zicky Dice vs Kenny King: Kenny wins via Royal Flush – N/A
  • The Design (Kon, Deaner, Angels & Callihan) vs Josh Alexander, Frankie Kazarian, Yuya Uemura & Rich Swann: Callihan wins via Cactus Driver ’97 – ** 1/2

 

Results:

Bullet Club (Ace & Bey) vs Kevin Knight & Kushida

As much as I like Ace & Bey, a part of me would like MCMG versus Kushida and his new partner.

Early on its just counters, posing to the crowd and getting themselves over until Bey manages to sweep the leg, slingshot over the top rope for a stomp and take over a little. Knight manages to avoid a corner move, one legged Springboard Body Press, Jumping Frog Splash, and then a quick tag to Kushida. Some tandem moves from Kushida and Knight as Knight continues to mix it up with Bey.

Ace distracts Knight before the Springboard and Bey meets him in midair with a Dropkick and gets Ace in for some tandem offense and then Ace starts setting the pace. Double Arm Wringer into a tandem Back Rake. Then they wrestle Knight to the ground and keep him down for another Back Rake. Ace continues to set the pace and keep Knight mostly on the receiving end, until Knight rolls out of a lift, Ricky to Robert roll, Kushida gets the hot tag and starts clearing the ring. Bey tries Art of Finesse, Kushida catches him in a Flying Armbar but Bey turns it into a Cradle to get Kushida to break.

Electric Chair from Kushida, but before Knight can hit his Dropkick, Ace slides in and catches Knight on his back. Chicken Fight before Kushida and Knight finally hit their Tandem move but Ace makes the save. Ace wipes out Kushida, Knight forces Ace out, tries to go for a Plancha, but Bey was crotched on the top rope. As Knight tries to Plancha, Bey hits a Cutter out of nowhere on the apron. Ace sees the opening, 1-2-Sweet for the win!

Steph De Lander video package…that’s a pretty decent grab for IMPACT.

Gisele Shaw w/Jai Vidal vs Savannah Evans

Gisele faces off with Savannah and slaps her in the face a few times and refuses to back down. Savannah of course fires back, but when Gisele gets violent is when she’s at her best. After a big toss, Gisele powders, confers with Jai and the commercial kicks in. When we get back, Gisele has the advantage. But Savannah takes the short arm pull in, Side Slam for effect and distance.

Now they start trading strikes, that Savannah wins that war. A few short Lariats, Samoan Drop, and Gisele is reeling. Retreats to the corner, tries to stop Savannah with the Back Elbow, but eats a Spinebuster when she tries to continue. Fisherman’s Suplex Hold from Savannah for 2, Full Nelson Slam attempt, but Jai hits the apron and tries to seduce the referee as a distraction. Gisele hits the Denouement (Knee Strike) for the win.

The crowd is actively booing Gisele, but she powers through for her promo. It wasn’t great, but I’ll give her some credit for pushing through. 

Crazzy Steve w/ Black Taurus vs Sheldon Jean

Sheldon Jean continues the arrogance, though he’s a nobody enhancement talent. It would be nice if some of these enhancement talent wrestlers didn’t all have that same arrogant persona. We all know Steve is going to win, this is just a storytelling tool to probably add to the Trey Miguel stuff.

Steve is entertaining, but this match is more predictable than most things. He hits King Kill 33, but apparently it’s called Belladonna’s Kiss now. Trey jumps Taurus, tries to spray paint Steve, but Steve bites him and spray paints himself causing Trey to powder out of confusion/fear.

Bully comes out to complain as has been his thing the last few weeks. But thankfully Mickie returns the favor from last week and interrupts Bully. Verbal jabs, Bully Ray insults Mickie, Mickie slaps him, Bully slams her and calls in the Good Hands to get the tables. Tommy Dreamer makes a save with a kendo stick. Good Hands vs Mickie & Tommy next week. 

Oh good, this is exactly what I wanted from a few weeks ago! Kelly and Taylor will be a great team.

Johnny Swinger w/Zicky Dice vs Kenny King

Some goofy posturing and general Swinger antics. Eddy Gordo kick into Royal Flush, and Kenny gets the obvious win.

Bully has a segment in the back with Masha, and it seems like he’s a little smitten while he was trying to just manipulate her emotions to pick up the pieces after or during the tag match next week. 

Cardona and Myers try to make their own diss track song…and it was awful. It was supposed to be bad, and yes, it achieved that. It was like Miz and Morrison, without comedic talent.

The Design (Kon, Deaner, Angels & Callihan) vs Josh Alexander, Frankie Kazarian, Yuya Uemura & Rich Swann

Deaner barks at Callihan to start against Swann, then commands him to tag out, and a multi-man match is always a little bit of everyone gets moments. So its just odd that the heel team will be dictated by Deaner to a degree. Uemura comes in second and he reminds me so much of a young Tanahashi its crazy. Deaner calls for the tag and squares off against Josh now.

An attempted jumping in the corner, but Josh gets space and it turns into all 8 men in at once. Josh goes right after Kon and tries to assert his dominance on the “power” of The Design. After the commercial, Uemura gets rocked but Kaz saves him with a blind tag and hits some of his classic moves on Angels and Callihan. Swann comes in but Deaner and Kon manage to ground Swann and put the momentum back in the hands on The Design.

Some stupid spots take away a little from the match while Swann is getting worked over. Swann slaps his leg when he eats a Dropkick from Angels, then tries to Leapfrog Deaner and jump to his corner, Deaner grabs him away but it just looks silly and like it was never going to work to begin with. Its the optime of doing too much and hurting the match. Josh eventually gets a hot tag, tags a square off with Kon, throws him around and King Kong Knee drops Kon. Ankle Lock gives the near fall but Kon kicks off, Uemura tags himself in, Callihan gets the tag, is about to finish off Uemura; but Deaner stops the Thumbs Up – so Josh breaks up the offense and we get all 8 men pulls off high impact moves.

Cactus Driver attempt, Uemura hits the Enzuigiri to stun Callihan. Goes to the top, Deaner trips Uemura, Cactus Driver ’97 wins the match.

 

Overall Score: 5/10

This was a weird episode. The only match worth watching was the opening tag match, the rest were predictable, boring or just had dumb spots in them. Backstage segments however, those were pretty great. The problem though, is they built off of either inside jokes, old WCW knowledge or not shutting off cringe immediately.

So while I loved the Raven & Reese segment, Kelly & Taylor, and found some amusement in the Cardona stuff…its really subjective and not exactly friendly to an uninitiated viewer. We got an episode that catered to already existing fans, which isn’t how to grow a brand.

Even though I enjoyed things for the most part, this was a lame episode from the perspective of retaining new eyes.


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Dynamite Results & Report! (2/1/23)

Dynamite is No Holds Barred!

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Will Darby Allin still be the Relentless TNT Champion?

Samoa Joe wants the AEW TNT Championship back, but he knows Darby Allin is relentless. Tonight on Dynamite, they go NO HOLDS BARRED for the gold! Will Joe once again be the King of Television?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Jon Moxley VS Hangman Page; Moxley wins.
  • The Acclaimed w/ Billy Gunn VS Truth Magnum & Turbo Floyd; The Acclaimed wins.
  • Brian Cage w/ Prince Nana VS Konosuke Takeshita; Takeshita wins.
  • Bryan Danielson VS Timothy Thatcher; Bryan wins.
  • AEW TBS Championship: Jade Cargill w/ Leila Grey VS Red Velvet; Cargill wins and retains the title.
  • AEW TNT Championship No Holds Barred: Darby Allin w/ Sting VS Samoa Joe; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

Jon Moxley w/ Wheeler Yuta VS Hangman Page!

The Maniac and the Cowboy go for their tiebreaker as Dynamite is in Dayton, Ohio! Will Ohio’s own knock this one out of the park like he did before? Or will there be some serious #CowboySh*t going down in Dayton?

Not only does Moxley have the Decoder by his side, he has his dad, Dan! Hangman makes his entrance next, and Moxley goes right after him! Moxley throws hands then whips Hangman into railing! The ref reprimands but Moxley sends Hangman into steel steps! Moxley throws hands, whips Hangman again and Hangman hits more railing hard! Fans fire up and the ref reprimands. Moxley just takes off his hoodie to CHOKE Hangman with it! Moxley TOSSES Hangman over the railing, and then he hops onto the railing! Dayton fires up, gives Moxley a hand, and Moxley FLYING AX HANDLES Hangman down!

Moxley brings Hangman up but Hangman throws hands! Hangman sits Moxley down, fires off more shots, then backs up. Hangman runs in to BOOT Moxley against railing! The ref reprimands, he wants this in the ring, but it isn’t a match yet so there’s no real repercussions. Hangman stalks Moxley along the way but Moxley kicks back. And CHOPS! Moxley trips Hangman then ties him up, FIGURE FOUR on the floor! Moxley and Hangman flip each other off but the ref still wants this in the ring. Hangman grabs someone’s beer and splashes Moxley with it! Moxley lets Hangman out of the hold, and then Hangman ROCKS Mox!

They go back to ringside, Moxley grabs a chair but Hangman CLUBS Moxley. But Moxley JAMS Hangman, tris him, and then drops an elbow on the leg! Moxley has a toehold, then he puts the chair around the leg! The ref reprimands but Moxley goes up the apron. The ref shouts at Moxley to not jump, but then Hangman gets free! Hangman CHUCKS the chair at Moxley’s head!! Moxley goes down and fans fire up! The ref reprimands again and wants this to get in the ring. Moxley is dazed, but Hangman drags him around, to suplex onto the chair! Hangman drags Moxley up and puts him in the ring, but he also brings the chair!

The ref stops Hangman, so Hangman leaves the chair behind. The bell finally rings, and Hangman runs in to forearm Moxley! Moxley hits back, they go back and forth! Moxley’s eyebrow is already busted open, but he keeps throwing shots. Hangman gets the edge, HEADBUTTS, then whips. Moxley reverses to dropkick the legs out! Moxley looms over Hangman, drags him into the INDIAN DEATHLOCK! Hangman endures, keeps his shoulders off the mat, but fans rally behind Moxley. Hangman drags himself back, reaches out, and gets the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Moxley lets Hangman go at 3.

Moxley brings Hangman up but Hangman gets around to GERMAN SUPLEXES! Moxley snarls but the blood is getting into his eye. Hangman DECKS Moxley and has him at the ropes. Hangman brings Moxley up, fans boo but Hangman CHOPS! Moxley flounders and falls and fans start dueling. Hangman stalks Moxley, sits him up, and he starts raining down fists right on the bloody eyebrow! Mox fans boo but Hangman fans are fired up for the “COWBOY SH*T!” Hangman wipes Moxley’s blood off on his chest, but then turns around into a CHOP! Moxley eggs Hangman on and Hangman CHOPS back!

Moxley CHOPS, Hangman CHOPS, fans “WOO~!” for the CHOP fight! Moxley shifts to boxing elbows, then runs, but Hangman catches the crossbody! FALL AWAY SLAM! Fans are torn while Moxley goes to the apron. Hangman runs, triangle jumps, but Moxley LARIATS first! Moxley drags Hangman up and to the apron, then turns Hangman, for a SLEEPER! The ref reprimands and wants this in the ring, but Hangman claws the bloody eyebrow! Moxley turns Hangman around, reels him in, but Hangman resists the lift! Hangman tries to lift, Moxley resists, and then Moxley lifts! Hangman fights that and lifts again, but Moxley still fights!

Both men are fighting for control, and Hangman fireman’s carries! To SNAKE EYES Moxley off the post! Moxley falls to the floor and Dynamite goes picture in picture!

The ref checks Moxley but he’s somehow okay to continue. Hangman goes over to fetch Moxley, and whips him into railing! Hangman ROCKS Moxley with haymakers as the bloody eyebrow becomes a crimson mask. Hangman refreshes the count, goes back to Moxley and CHOPS him! Moxley gets in Hangman’s face so Hangman CHOPS again! Moxley CHOPS and CHOPS and CHOPS, but Hangman DECKS him! Hangman snarls, looms over Moxley, and then drags him back up. Hangman puts Moxley in the ring, and rains down more fists on that bloody eyebrow! Moxley falls over, but Hangman gets the wrists!

Hangman sits Moxley up, for a DRAGON STOMP, but Moxley blocks! Moxley throws Hangman to a corner and fires off forearms and CHOPS on repeat! Moxley then hoists Hangman up top, climbs up after him, and CLAWS Hangman’s back, painfully slow! Then he CLAWS and BITES Hangman’s back, before blowing a kiss to the fans. But Hangman throws body shots in return! Dynamite returns to single picture as Hangman BITES Moxley’s forehead! Hangman then slips under Moxley to fireman’s carry him on the second rope! SUPER DEATH VALLEY DRIVER!! Cover, TWO!! Moxley survives and fans are fired up!

Fans duel as Hangman sits up. Hangman scowls while Moxley sits up. Moxley eggs Hangman on so Hangman kicks him! And BOOTS him! Hangman tells Moxley to stay down but he refuses. Moxley sits up, so Hangman BOOTS him! Moxley sits up to SLAP Hangman, and flips him off! Hangman is fuming, but he runs into a CUTTER! A standing count starts, fans count along as Moxley and Hangman stir. They sit up at 5 of 10, and Moxley throws a haymaker. Hangman throws it back, so Moxley gives another,. They go back and forth, Hangman wobbles but he CHOPS! Moxley CHOPS! Hangman forearms! Moxley forearms back!

Moxley eggs Hangman on, Hangman staggers over and CHOPS again! Moxley KICKS a leg, KICKS Hangman’s arm, then KICKS him again! Moxley ducks the haymaker to get the SLEEPER! Hangman shifts to SAIDO! But Moxley’s right up! SAIDO!! Hangman ends up in a corner and fans say “This is Awesome!” Moxley puts Hangman up top, climbs up after him, and hits a SUPER HALF HATCH SUPLEX!! Cover, TWO!! Moxley immediately rains down the HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! Then he clamps on a SLEEPER! Hangman endures as Moxley shifts to a BULLY CHOKE! Hangman pushes around, so Moxley shifts to get the wrists! DRAGON STOMPS!!

Moxley then drags Hangman up into the underhooks! But Hangman fights Death Rider! So Moxley rolls Hangman to an ARMBAR! Hangman endures, moves around, and reaches out to the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts and Moxley lets go at 4. Hangman crawls to a corner, fans rally up, and Moxley says this is it! Moxley runs in but Hangman TOSSES him up and out! Moxley staggers up, Hangman goes up top! ARIHARA MOONSAULT but Moxley moves! And LARIATS!! Both men are down at the ramp and fans are thunderous! The ref checks both men, Moxley is up first while fans lose their minds.

Moxley goes to the timekeeper’s area and he clears off the table! Moxley drags Hangman over, reels him in, but Hangman resists the lift! Hangman Alabama Lifts but Moxley fights that. DOUBLE LARIATS hit! And again! Moxley runs in, POP-UP POWERBOMB THROUGH THE TABLE!! Fans lose their minds again while Hangman leaves Moxley behind in the ring. The ring count climbs to 5 of 10 before Moxley sits up. The count is 7! Then “OCHO!” Moxley stands at 9, and springs in at 9.9!! But into a LARIAT!! And then Alabama Lift, DEADEYE!!! Cover, TWO?!?! Moxley survives and no one can believe it!

Hangman kicks at Moxley, almost taunting him. Hangman goes to a corner while Moxley’s fans boo. Hangman runs in, but Moxley dodges the stomp to KING KONG LARIAT!! Fans are thunderous as both men stand again. Moxley eggs Hangman on, and Hangman stands. Moxley throws a forearm, so Hangman hits back! Moxley forearms again, but so does Hangman! Fans duel, the forearms fly faster, and then Hangman gets the edge! SUPERKICK! Hangman reels Moxley in, fisherman’s a leg, but Moxley fights the suplex! Hangman powers it through, FISHERMAN CRADLE DRIVER!! Cover, TWO!?!?!?

Hangman’s wild eyes say he can’t believe Moxley survived! Hangman goes to the apron, he aims at Moxley, slingshot for the BUCK- NO! DEATH- NO, Hangman blocks to scoop! TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER!!! But Hangman doesn’t cover, he goes to the apron! Hangman loads up, for the BUCKSHOT!!! Cover, TWO!?!?!? HOW?!?! Moxley has survived all of Hangman’s best, but Hangman has the BULLY CHOKE!! Hangman pulls back on Moxley’s favorite hold! Moxley shifts, fights back up, and he snapmares into a cradle! MOXLEY WINS!!

Winner: Jon Moxley, by pinfall

Moxley just taught Hangman not to play games! Hangman is furious that he got caught like that, but the Blackpool Combat Club steps into the ring. Yuta and Claudio keep Hangman back but Moxley stands up. Moxley and Hangman get in each other’s face but the BCC keep them apart. Hangman flips Moxley off, and fans want to “LET THEM FIGHT!” Moxley and Hangman keep jawing, they get close but Claudio keeps them separate. Moxley mocks Hangman by lying down, giving Hangman a chance. Hangman mocks Moxley back by doing a quick burpie push-up. Claudio tells Hangman to go and cool off.

Moxley flips Hangman off as he leaves, and fans celebrate their home state hero. Will there be a fourth round out of these two to truly settle things?

 

AEW takes a look at tonight’s TNT Championship No Holds Barred main event!

Darby Allin tells Samoa Joe, “I knew when I took this from you in Seattle that you’d want it back. And I know you’d stop at nothing to have it back. Well, I’m gonna make things fair. You beat me in Texas, and you granted me my rematch in Seattle. So I’m granting you your rematch in Ohio. But I want it under one condition: No Holds Barred.” Samoa Joe told the “Little Dead Boy” that Joe is “coming to take back what’s mine. The King will not be usurped by a man like you.” Darby says if he walks out the winner, Joe doesn’t get another rematch. If Joe walks out the winner, Darby won’t get a rematch. This will be the final chapter of their feud! So who writes their happily ever after?

 

Backstage interview with Jamie Hayter, The Bunny, The Butcher & The Blade.

Renee Paquette is with the AEW Women’s World Champion, as well as the mercenary trio. Renee thanks them for agreeing to no physicality, and understands that Allie the Bunny requested this time. Bunny tells Hayter, they’re all very impressed by Hayter’s win over Emi Sakura on Rampage last Friday. Now, Bunny feels like Sakura outshined Hayter, but great win nonetheless. And Bunny knows Hayter isn’t the type to back down from a challenge, right? Right. So here’s a challenge: next week on Dynamite, Hayter VS Bunny in a Title Eliminator Match! What does Hayter say? Hayter says absolutely! She bloody loves a challenge, and next week, she’s free.

Renee says there’s something happening as we speak! They get it on the television screen nearby, and it’s Britt Baker being mugged by Saraya and Toni Storm!! Bunny is shocked and Hayter is furious! Hayter hurries off, Saraya talks right into the camera, “AEW is OUR house!” Storm drags Britt up to RAM her into a garage door! Bunny more or less expresses exasperation, but will Hayter be able to save the Doctor?

 

The Acclaimed w/ Billy Gunn VS Truth Magnum & Turbo Floyd!

The AEW World Tag Team Champions have been reigning for 133 days, but they know the Gunn Sons, Austin & Colten, are gunning for them. But first, they tune up against “The Outrunners.” As always, Platinum Max has a diss track ready! “Acclaimed on the mic, you know we the nicest. Fighting two guys in their midlife crisis! I bet you have sex with each other. How we gonna fight the bootleg Beverly Brothers? C’mon, it’s not the 80s! Acclaimed gonna make you call it quits like you Tom Brady! ‘Ey, y’all should be ashamed. In Ohio, everybody loves The Acclaimed.”

Fans cheer, and Bowens gets the mic to say, “NNNUTTER CENTERRR~! The Acclaimed have arrived! SCISSOR ME, DADDY ASS!” And he does~! But while Caster & Bowens just embarrassed Truth & Turbo, are they walking into a trap game before taking on the Ass Boys?

The teams sort out, the Outrunners decide they’ll scissor finger! They mock the Mega Powers at the same time, but then Bowens SUPERKICKS Truth out of the ring! The bell rings, Caster CHOPS Turbo and scoops him to SLAM him! Tag to Bowens and Bowens goes up top! Caster holds open the legs, SCISSOR ME TURBO! Daddy Ass gets in the ring so that he and the boys can TRIPLE SCISSOR~! Bowens waits on Turbo, mule kicks and hits the ARRIVAL! Tag to Caster and he goes up top, MIC DROP! Cover, The Acclaimed win!

Winners: The Acclaimed, by pinfall

But wait! Raining on the parade are Austin & Colten! Fans taunt the “ASS~ BOYS~!” But they tune that out. They go to the ring, and Colten has a mic. “Hey, good match, guys. But we’re here to talk about something serious. Last week, what we said would make us happy are your belts. And we want a shot at those belts, and we want an answer right now.” Fans boo but Caster has the mic to say, “Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Listen.” Bowens says, “You two Rod ‘n’ Todd lookin’ asses want an answer. You do realize you are interrupting the most popular tag team in all of wrestling, right?” Caster adds, “That’s right!”

“The winningest tag team in AEW history!” “That’s right!” “The FOREVER champs, the Acclaimed!” “That’s right!” “And not to mention, EVERYONE! LOVES! THE ACCLAIMED!” But they are the People’s Choice, and the People’s Voice, they will ask the people. Colten says these fans can’t even read! But Bowens still asks Dayton’s opinion: Do the Ass Boys deserve a shot at the tag titles? “NOOO~!” Well, the people have spoken, so NO. Austin & Colten get in Caster’s & Bowens’ faces, but Billy tells them all to stop! Isn’t it enough already? Billy is so sick of this, he is just done! Billy says this is too much, so go ahead, beat the sh*t out of each other!

Daddy Ass steps aside, fans fire up, but Austin says, “There you go. Do exactly what you did our entire childhoods and turn your back on us.” Billy stops walking up the ramp, but then chuckles as he keeps going. Austin says Billy should do what he used to do, and drown his sorrows at the bottom of a PILL BOTTLE! That gets Billy to turn around! Billy storms up on his sons and The Acclaimed, as well as the fans, tell the Ass Boys that they F’d up. Billy is up in Austin’s face and says, “So you two think you just put your big boy pants on? Then you just step up, and you just made the biggest mistake…”

The mic is wonky so Billy throws it down. Bowens gives Billy the good one. Billy wants Austin to look at him after what he just said. Austin looks up at his father’s eyes. Billy says if they’ve got their big boy pants on, if they think they got what it takes, if they think they have what Billy had, then we’ll see next week. They’ve got their title shots! The Acclaimed is surprised but the Ass Boys smile that they’re getting their way. Will Austin & Colten get what they want? Or just what they deserve?

 

Backstage interview with Jack Perry.

Alex Marvez is with Jungle Boy and notes that he and Hook are 2-0 as a team, having beaten The Firm’s Ethan Page & Matt Hardy. The question is: What’s next for #JungleHook? JB says that he had an amazing time teaming with Hook, and Hook has had JB’s back when no one else did. But JB’s done the tag team thing before. In fact, JB has been all the way to the top of that mountain, and fallen all the way down. But this year isn’t about that. What JB will say is that he’ll be a champion again, but all by himself. Then just what title will Jack Perry aim for in this Tarzan Life?

 

Brian Cage w/ Prince Nana VS Konosuke Takeshita!

Speaking of having people’s backs, just as The Machine and MJF were about to destroy Bryan Danielson, The Future of Wrestling rushed out to run them off! But now, Cage and Konosuke go toe to toe, will Cage make Konosuke pay for interfering?

The bell rings and Konosuke BOOTS Cage! Cage BOOTS Konosuke, then DOUBLE LARIATS collide! Cage swings but Konosuke swats it to ROLLING ELBOW! Cage wobbles, Konosuke runs, ducks ‘n’ dodges, and then TAKESHITA LINES! Cage bails out and fans fire up! Konosuke runs to BOOT Cage off the apron! Konosuke then PLANCHAS and takes Cage down at the ramp! Fans fire up, Konosuke winks at the camera, and then goes back to the apron. But Cage grabs a foot! Konosuke kicks and stomps Cage but Cage yanks Konosuke into a POST BOMB! Konosuke tumbles down and fans boo but Nana cheers.

Cage drags Konosuke up, puts him in, and runs to basement BOOT! Cover, TWO! Fans rally for Konosuke but Cage drags him back up. Cage reels Konosuke in, puts one out, but Konosuke wrenches out! Konosuke throws a forearm, but Cage gives it back! They go forearm for forearm, and Konosuke throws boxing elbows into the ROLLING ELBOW! Cage fights the back suplex, KNEES low, and brags, “Who betta than Cage?” But he runs into a BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Cover, TWO! Cage survives and Konosuke is surprised! Nana coaches Cage up but Konosuke aims from a corner. Konosuke runs in to JUMP KNEE, but Cage dodges!

Konosuke tumbles to the apron, Cage ROUNDHOUSES him! Cage climbs the ropes, and he stands Konosuke up. DEADLIFT SUPERPLEX! Fans boo but Cage flexes while Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Cage drops a knee on Konosuke, sits him up to KNEE him in the back again and again, then he stomps Konosuke back down. Cage paces, drags Konosuke up, and bumps him off buckles. Cage RAMS into Konosuke, RAMS him again, and then CHOPS him! Cage soaks up the heat, but Konosuke CHOPS back! Konosuke fires forearms, then another CHOP! And another CHOP! But Cage BOOTS Konosuke down! Cage grabs the legs, stomps Konosuke in the stomach, then paces around. Cage stands Konosuke up, wrenches and YANKS the arm, then RAMS shoulders. Cage wrenches, pump handles, and lifts, but Konosuke slips out!

Konosuke runs in but Cage ducks the boot to roll Konosuke up! Konosuke slips out, but runs into a drop toehold! Konosuke’s on ropes, Cage dials it up, TIGER FEINT KICK! Konosuke staggers to a corner, Cage runs in and UPPERCUTS, GAMANGIRIS, and GERMAN SUPLEXES! Cover, TWO!! Cage and Nana are annoyed, but Cage looms over Konosuke. Cage hears the fans rally for Konosuke, but Cage drags him up. Cage reels Konosuke in, puts out another one, and Dynamite returns to single picture as Cage lifts, only for Konosuke to RANA Cage into buckles! BLINDSIDE JUMP KNEE! Cage staggers, Konosuke goes up, FLYING KNEE!

Both men are down and fans fire up! Konosuke and Cage stir as the ring count starts. Konosuke sits up and feeds off the energy. Konosuke drags Cage up into a waistlock, but Cage elbows free! Cage whips, Konosuke LARIATS on the return! Konosuke drags Cage up, waistlocks and GERMAN SUPLEXES! Bridging cover, TWO!! Fans rally while Konosuke fires up. Konosuke aims from the corner as Cage stands, and Konosuke runs in, JUMP- NO! Cage blocks the knee to BUCKLE BOMB! And then fireman’s carry, to an F- NO! Konosuke lands out, lifts and LIGER BOMBS! Cover, TWO!! Cage survives but fans fire up behind Konosuke!

Konosuke aims again while Nana shouts to Cage. Cage stands, Konosuke runs in but the knee is blocked! Cage spins, Konosuke ducks! Konosuke spins, ROLLING ELBOW!! Konosuke reels Cage in, but Cage wrenches out to HEADBUTT! And then SAIDO!! But Konosuke is right up?! Into a DISCUS LARIAT from Cage!! Cover, TWO!?! Konosuke survives and Nana is furious! Cage says he’s gonna end this, and he suplexes, only for Konosuke to slip out! Konosuke suplexes, SHEER DROP BRAINBUSTER!! Cage roars as he rises up, but Konosuke ROCKS him with another elbow! And then another suplex, for another BRAINBUSTER!!! Cover, TWO!?!?

Cage survives, he must truly be a machine! But Dayton rallies behind Konosuke. Konosuke runs in, but into a SUPERKICK! Cage fireman’s carries, for the F10!! Nana says no prisoners! Cage drags Konosuke up again, puts him in the corner and hoists him to the top. Cage then goes to the outside and climbs up after Konosuke. But Konosuke throws forearms in return! Konosuke suplexes for a SUPER BRAINBUSTER!!! Fans are thunderous and Konosuke aims again! KNOCKOUT KNEE!!! Cover, Konosuke wins!!

Winner: Konosuke Takeshita, by pinfall

Cage may be a machine, but the machine just broke down against the bullet train! Will Konosuke continue to prove why he IS The Future of Wrestling?

 

Backstage interview with the Jericho Appreciation Society.

Renee is with Matthew Menard, Angelo Parker, Daniel Garcia, Sammy Guevara, and of course, Chris Jericho himself. Renee says that we heard Ricky Starks’ comments from last week, addressing how the JAS cheated to win. What is their reaction? Jericho says, “Cheated? We haven’t worked together in five years, and you’re accusing us of cheating? Let me say this, Renee. Ricky Starks, he didn’t lose to a baseball bat, no. Did you see a baseball bat in there?” Of course the JAS says no. Jericho says Starks lost to the JAS. And now Starks challenges them, “How can I get another match with Chris Jericho?”

Jericho says the JAS has an idea how Starks can do that. Right, Sammy? Sammy says yes. Garcia and Sammy put their heads together, and they came up with a great idea: The Guevara-Garcia… No, wait, the Garcia-Guevara Gauntlet! Danny thanks Sammy for the top billing on that name. Renee asks what kind of gauntlet they have in mind. Garcia says it’s a rather simple concept. “Ricky, first you’re gonna have to beat Cool Hand Ange. And if that happens, you’re gonna have to beat Daddy Magic.” Menard adds, “Beat Daddy Magic? I DON’T THINK SO!” Garcia says that if Starks somehow does that, then he beats either Garcia or Guevara, but they’ll reveal that the night of.

And then, if somehow, by the skin of his teeth, Starks makes it past all that, only then does Starks get his hands on Jericho. Jericho tells Starks, “You don’t call the shots around here, the Jericho Appreciation Society does. So if you can get through the Garcia-Guevara Gauntlet, I’ll be ready to rip your ass!” Will the Absolute survive three matches in one go to finally have another shot at The Ocho?

 

The Elite speak.

Matt Jackson asks Brandon Cutler if the camera is rolling as he, brother Nick, Kenny Omega, Michael Nakazawa and Don Callis are on the basketball court. Cutler says yes, they’re live, while Nakazawa and Callis are oiling Omega up. Matt says, “Ladies and gentlemen, check it out who it is! It’s the first-ever, two-time Trios Champions, The Elite.” Omega says that’s right, and he tells Top Flight, “I watched what you guys did. After a Best of 7 Series in a ladder match, you got one up on our boys. Well how ’bout next week, you bring your friend, AR Fox, next week and we’ll put these belts on the line, and you guys can shoot your shot.

“But hey, when you shoot that shot, you best not miss. Because The Elite never miss. Nick, if you will.” Nick takes the rock and shoots it, THREE POINTER! Oh, but wait! The Firm’s Stokely Hathaway, Ethan Page, Matt Hardy & Isiah Kassidy walk in. Callis has Cutler keep rolling, and Omega mockingly asks where Stokely is, he can’t see him. Oh haha, Stokely knows you see him, he’s right here. But listen, you three are doing NOTHING all week? No wrestling, nothing? Just a week off? Ethan thinks that’s funny. The Firm’s employees don’t have that luxury, they work every single week, and Ethan wants that streak to continue.

So Ethan says how about this: The Elite VS Ethan, Matt & “Zay,” Friday on Rampage. Omega tells Callis he isn’t so sure, but Callis says this is Matt Hardy. If they get footage of Hardy taking a One Winged Angel, they could sell that NFT for a lot of money. Hardy says, “What about an NFT with Matt Hardy Twist-Of-Fating Omega?” Ethan likes that better! Well, as far as a match, it’s done. The Elite VS The Whatever They Are. Kassidy says he hopes the Elite is ready, cuz they sure are. Kassidy unsettles Kenny with an arm around his shoulders and a moan, and Ethan says this is good business. Hey, Brandon, is it? Cut the camera!

Matt Jackson tells Ethan Page that he doesn’t tell Brandon what to do! THEY tell him! Turn off the camera, ya damn dumbass! And get off the court, they’re trying to play. But will this 3v3 pick-up game go The Elite’s way? Or is it a trap game before taking on Fox, Dante & Darius?

 

Bryan Danielson VS Timothy Thatcher!

In the American Dragon’s quest to be #1 contender, he has defeated Tony Nese, Konosuke Takeshita, Bandido and Brian Cage, an undefeated streak of 4-0 in 2023! But now, Maxwell Jacob Friedman has enlisted a fighter very much like Bryan in his savage technical ability. Will Bryan make it to the deadline still on top? Or is this where MJF wins before Revolution even begins?

The bell rings and the two circle. They feel out the grapple, but Bryan’s shoulder is an obvious target. They grapple, Bryan puts Thatcher on ropes but Thatcher shifts to get the arm. Thatcher wrangles Bryan but Bryan scrambles to the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Thatcher lets off, and then smirks as he watches Bryan get up. Bryan and Thatcher feel out another grapple, Thatcher puts him in the corner, and then European Uppercuts! And again! And again! Bryan sits down and Thatcher goes after the arm! Thatcher twists the elbow and wrist, isolates the arm, and stands on the hand! Thatcher KNEES the arm!

Bryan scrambles away but Thatcher is right on him with a double wristlock! Bryan powers Thatcher to ropes, and clasps his hands behind his back. The ref counts, the two let off, but then Bryan fires off body shots and kicks! Bryan grabs a leg to DRAGON SCREW! Bryan holds onto the leg, turns Thatcher over and ties those legs up, to get a Deathlock! Fans rally as Bryan sits on the hold, then SNAPS it! Bryan then shifts to a BOW ‘N’ ARROW! Thatcher pries the fingers away! Bryan shouts in pain but Thatcher twists the arm! And STOMPS it down! Fans boo but Thatcher grins with that missing-tooth smile.

Thatcher KNEES Bryan in the back, stalks him to a corner, but Bryan puts Thatcher in the corner to CHOP and CHOP and KICK and KICK! Fans rally, Bryan runs corner to corner, and DROPKICKS! Bryan facelocks but Thatcher wrenches and WRINGS Bryan’s arm! Fans boo more but Thatcher drags Bryan up with a double wristlock! Thatcher uses his height to lift Bryan off the mat! Then Thatcher pushes Bryan down, but Bryan keeps his shoulders up. Bryan crawls around, ROPEBREAK! Thatcher lets go at 4 while fans rally up. Bryan clutches his arm but Thatcher goes after it again as Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Bryan endures but they’re also in the ropes so the ref counts. Thatcher lets off at 4, then digs his boot into Bryan at the corner. The ref counts, Thatcher lets off, only to stand on Bryan’s chest! The ref counts, Thatcher steps away, and he grins as he soaks up the heat. Thatcher mocks Bryan’s pain, then KNEES the bad shoulder! Thatcher KNEES Bryan again, goes out to drag Bryan tot he apron, and he SLAMS the arm on the edge! Bryan clutches his bicep and shoulder while the ref reprimands. Thatcher slides into the ring and stands Bryan up by his ears! Thatcher CLUBS Bryan on the chest! Thatcher fishhooks Bryan to stand him up, and CLUBS him again!

Bryan sits down, Thatcher stands him back up, and he hammerlocks the bad arm. Thatcher then back suplexes Bryan up and into the ring! Thatcher dusts off his hands while crawling to the cover, but Bryan wrangles him into the LEBELL LOCK!! Thatcher got cocky and got caught! But he scrambles to the ROPEBREAK! Bryan lets off quickly, but Thatcher is right on him! Thatcher UPPERCUTS the arm! Bryan goes to a corner, Thatcher KNEES him down, then drags Bryan back up. Thatcher EuroUppers Bryan, taunts the fans, then EuroUppers Bryan again. Bryan leans against ropes, Thatcher snarls at the fans, then gets in Bryan’s face.

Dynamite returns to single picture as Thatcher traps Bryan’s bad arm behind his back and throws hard body shots to that side. The ref counts but Thatcher grins as he throws more shots. Bryan fights back with HEADBUTTS! Fans fire up as Bryan backs Thatcher down, but Thatcher fires off body shot after body shot! Thatcher drags Bryan out to a hammerlock GROVIT, and then hits a GROVIT-PLEX! Cover, TWO!! Bryan is still in this but Thatcher snarls. Thatcher stalks Bryan at the ropes, bumps him off buckles, then reels Bryan in to hoist him up top. Thatcher UPPERCUTS, climbs up after Bryan, and he underhooks the arms!

Bryan resists and fans fire up! Bryan breaks free, throws body shot after body shot in return, and then HEADBUTTS Thatcher down! Thatcher growls and gets right back up! But Bryan throws more body shots! Fans rally “YES! YES! YES!” and Bryan HEADBUTTS again! Thatcher stays down this time, and Bryan stands up! Thatcher stands in time for the MISSILE DROPKICK! Both men are down as Bryan clutches his bad arm, but Dayton rallies up behind him! Bryan and Thatcher sit up, both snarl, and Thatcher EuroUppers! Bryan EuroUppers in return! They go uppercut for uppercut, but Thatcher gets the edge!

Bryan fires up to KICK! And KICK! Bryan KICKS away on Thatcher’s chest, “YES! YES! YES!” Bryan powers up but Thatcher blocks the Buzzsaw! Thatcher goes for the bad arm, wrangles Bryan down, but Bryan rolls through and gets around to waistlock. Thatcher bucks the O’Conner but runs into a backslide! TWO, FUJIWARA! No, Bryan rolls through to BUZZSAW! Cover, TWO!! But Bryan clamps on for HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! Fans rally again, but Thatcher blocks the arm! Bryan claws Thatcher’s face to get free, and get a SLEEPER! But Thatcher wants that bad arm! Bryan has to shift his grip, but Thatcher stands!

Thatcher pries the sleeper open because he can get the bad arm, but Bryan powers up! Bryan has the hold on tight, so Thatcher backs Bryan down! They end up ramming the ref into the corner! Bryan still holds on, but Thatcher hits a BIG back suplex! All three men are down and fans fire up! But here comes MJF! The AEW World Champion tells Dayton to shush, and he puts on the Dynamite Diamond Ring! MJF says, “It’s too damn easy. This is done! This is done!” MJF goes to the ring, but KONOSUKE flies in outta nowhere!! Konosuke won’t let MJF screw Bryan over! Konosuke attacks MJF, RAMS him into railing, and chases him to the back!

Bryan has Thatcher but Thatcher snatches the arm! FUJIWARA ARMBAR!! The ref is up, he asks Bryan, but Bryan endures! Thatcher pushes way back on the arm, but Bryan pushes his way forward with his legs! ROPEBREAK!! Fans fire up as Bryan survives by a literal foot! Thatcher lets go in frustration and he scowls as he throws hands on the bad arm. Thatcher drags Bryan up, clinches, BELLY2BELLY SUPLEX! Bryan flounders but Thatcher runs in, clinches, but Bryan switches! GERMAN SUPLEX! Thatcher fumes as he gets back up! Bryan dodges him, runs back in, BUSAIKU KNEE!! Cover, Bryan wins!

Winner: Bryan Danielson, by pinfall

Now 5-0 on the year, the quest continues! The American Dragon is not yet slain, but wait! MJF and Konosuke continue brawling backstage! MJF turns things around to send MJF into a road case! MJF gets a chair to CHUCK it at Konosuke’s head! And then he throws a trash bin! MJF says if Konosuke wants after him, this is what he gets! But Konosuke turns things back around to SMACK MJF off a table! MJF comes back, the hands fly, and security rushes in! Referees and management try to stop this, too! MJF says he’ll kill Konosuke but Konosuke says about the same in Japanese! Renee runs in to be on the scene, and she tells everyone to stop!

Renee informs everyone, “Per Tony Khan, next week on Dynamite in an Eliminator match, it will be Takeshita VS MJF!” MJF is pissed, he doesn’t agree to that, but he MUST! Will the Devil of AEW find that the Future of Wrestling is better than him?

 

Mogul Affiliates speak.

Swerve Strickland says, “It’s been a real relaxing last couple of weeks for Swerve and the Mogul Affiliates and all, since getting rid of some dead weight and all this. Until I was like, retriggered.” Dustin Rhodes returning to stand in front of Swerve’s camera, in front of Swerve’s lights, and with Swerve’s interviewer! “The Rhodes Family legacy really gets under my skin, with your father, Dusty Rhodes, giving Keith Lee the ‘Limitless’ moniker. So, since he’s not here, Dustin’s not here, either, let’s find some other nepotism, second generation punk boy to get rid of Friday night on Rampage. That means you, Brian Pillman. Ain’t that right, Parker?”

Parker Boudreaux says that’s right. “Ain’t that right, Trench?” The tattooed man says, “Yeah, that’s right.” Hoodies up, but will they put Bulletproof BPJ down?

 

BREAKING NEWS for next week!

February 8th, the deadline for Bryan Danielson becoming #1 contender, will see The American Dragon taking on La Faccion Ingobernable’s El Toro Blanco, RUSH!! And speaking of…

Backstage interview with LFI.

Lexi Nair is with El Toro Blanco, but also Jose the Assistant and “Perro Peligroso,” Preston Vance. She notes the announcement of Rush VS Bryan, but then there’s a knock at the door. MJF walks in and says, “Hola, mi hermanos! Senor Vance, Senor Jose, Senor Rrrrrush.” Rush asks what the hell this “perro” wants. MJF double checks, “perro” is dog, right? Well, there’s a little thing called personal space, so he’s just gonna take a step back. “But here’s the deal: my, uh, Spanish is come se dice… Mid. But I know one language, my friend, that is mucho, mucho universal.” And that is MONEY! A huge briefcase full of it!

MJF snaps the case shut and smiles. This first one is free of charge. But he has FIVE MORE filled to the brim with dinero. All Rush has to do is beat Bryan Danielson “by any means necessary.” All Rush needs to do is rip Bryan’s arm off and beat him over the head with it. Can Rush pull that off for him? Jose, translate. Jose translates, but Rush seems to understand explicitly. Rush tells MJF in Spanish, and MJF asks “dipsh*t” Jose to translate. Jose sums it up by saying they have a deal. Oh, is that right? That sounded a bit longer than that. But Rush, you don’t have to like MJF. He just has to get the job done. Pleasure doing business with you, perro.

MJF leaves, but Rush has his mission. Will Rush be raking in the money with one match? Or will nothing stop Bryan Danielson from earning his title match?

 

AEW TBS Championship: Jade Cargill w/ Leila Grey VS Red Velvet!

Finally, the biggest, fastest-rising star has reached her FIFTIETH match! But while the streak started with The Chef, will it end with her, too? Or will #ThatBitch not be stopped by even the person who knows her best?

The introductions are made, but Velvet attacks while Jade is strutting around! The bell rings, Velvet fires off forearms but Jade knees her low. Jade whips Velvet to a corner but Velvet boots her back! THESZ PRESS! Velvet rains down hands but Jade shoves her away. Velvet ducks but runs into an elbow! Jade drags Velvet up, but Velvet fires off forearms! Velvet whips, Jade blocks to reverse, but Velvet holds ropes. Jade runs in but Velvet sends her out! Leila hurries to Jade’s side but Velvet builds speed! Velvet WRECKS Jade with a dropkick! Velvet tells Leila to back off, then she storms up on Jade.

Jade elbows Velvet away, but Velvet comes back to ROCK Jade! Velvet CHOPS Jade right in front of her family! Velvet then puts Jade in the ring, storms up on her and Oklahoma Rolls! TWO! Jade staggers up, blocks a superkick, and she spins Velvet around. Velvet ducks the haymaker and runs the ropes, then wheelbarrows, but into a GERMAN SUPLEX! Fans fire up while Jade drags Velvet over to a cover, TWO! Velvet is toughing it out but Jade is getting frustrated. Jade scoops Velvet to SLAM her, then drops a BIG elbow! Cover, TWO, and Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Leila is annoyed and Jade frowns while Velvet sputters. Jade drags Velvet up, CLUBS her down, and Leila applauds. Jade bumps Velvet off top buckles, then middle buckles, then bottom buckles! Jade stands on Velvet in the corner and soaks up the cheers and jeers, but lets off at 4. Jade and the ref argue, but Leila gets cheap shots in! Leila scurries away and Jade hauls Velvet up for a FALL AWAY SLAM! And then kips up! Jade holds up both hands to say 50, and then flexes. Velvet bails out, Leila talks trash, and Jade storms over. Jade walks up but Velvet sends her into railing! Jade is getting mad, but Velvet avoids one haymaker to PENALTY KICK from the apron!

Velvet CROSSBODIES, but Jade catches her! Jade POSTS Velvet, then carries her around the way. Jade trophy lifts Velvet, goes up the steel steps, and then TOSSES Velvet at the ropes! Velvet falls, Jade covers, TWO!!! Velvet survives and Jade is getting real mad. Leila rallies the Baddie cheering section, and Jade stalks Velvet to a corner. Jade drags Velvet up, and TOSSES her across the way! Jade says that’s 50 right there, and then she does push-ups as Dynamite returns to single picture. But Velvet CHOPS! Jade CLUBS Velvet, then TOSSES her across the way again! Jade swaggers, dribbles, but Velvet dodges the dunk!

Velvet DROPKICKS Jade, then hits a CODE BREAKER! Jade staggers around, Velvet KICKS and KICKS and mule kicks! Velvet runs, but Jade BOOTS her down! Cover, TWO!! Velvet is still in this and wait! Kiera Hogan RAMS Leila into steel steps! The other former Baddie is here, but other refs come out to have her leave. This all distracts Jade, and Velvet rolls her up! Jade rolls through, but the STIR IT UP hits!! Cover, but the refs aren’t paying attention!! Fans count, Velvet would’ve won twice over by now! Aubrey Edwards finally notices and counts, TWO!! Jade survives and fans can’t believe it!!

Velvet is furious, she drags Jade around and hooks an arm, short arm scissor, and then the INVERSION! Jade endures, fights, but Velvet kicks at her! Jade endures as Velvet pulls on the arm, and she deadlifts Velvet! But Velvet sunset flips! Jade stays up, drags Velvet up with both hands, and pops her around! Chicken wings for JADED!!! Cover, Jade wins!!

Winner: Jade Cargill, by pinfall (still AEW TBS Champion)

FIFTY AND OH! Velvet came the closest of all, but will anyone ever stop Jade’s undefeated streak?

 

Backstage interview with Britt Baker.

Renee is with The Doctor, as well as Jamie Hayter, as they are with Doc Sampson. We only caught a glimpse of what happened to her earlier at the hands of Saraya & Storm, how is Britt feeling? Britt says this is fine. She’s fine, and if that’s how Storm & Saraya wanna play, that’s fine, too. Because Britt & Hayter can play that game, too. But wait, in walks Ruby Soho! Ruby just wants to talk. She heard what happened, is Britt good? Uh, Ruby, weren’t those your girls? Ruby has Britt hold on there. Ruby has nothing to do with Saraya & Storm, she doesn’t know what Britt’s talking about.

Britt says Ruby’s known Saraya & Storm a lot longer than she’s known the AEW originals, so sorry if it’s strange that Ruby only now shows up. But yeah, Britt is good. Hayter says Britt is great, actually. Ruby says she’s glad to hear it and walks off. There are battle lines being drawn, which side is the Runaway on?

 

BREAKING NEWS for Rampage!

Not only are The Elite and The Firm having it out, it is for the AEW World Trios Championships! Will Kenny & The Young Bucks make it through All Ego, Hardy & Kassidy to then take on Fox & Top Flight? Or will there be a change of plans for Dynamite? And speaking of Saraya & Storm, they are in tag team action once again, but will they continue to beat down All Elite homegrown talent? Plus, before taking on Bryan Danielson, Rush will take on the Fallen Angel, Christopher Daniels, in an epic match of former ROH World Heavyweight Champions! Will El Toro Blanco build momentum going into his battle with The American Dragon?

 

AEW TNT Championship No Holds Barred: Darby Allin w/ Sting VS Samoa Joe!

The series is tied at 1-1, with the Samoan Submission Specialist winning in Texas, but the Relentless One winning in his hometown of Seattle. Dynamite in Dayton is throwing out all the rules except one: win! Will Darby continue to be the fighting champion? Or will Joe return to being the One True King of Wrestling Television?

The introductions are made, the TNT title is raised, and one way or another, this is the series finale of Darby VS Joe!

Darby takes off his trench coat to reveal he, uh, customized his Hoodlum hoodie. He’s covered it in thumbtacks!! And as soon as he’s in the ring, he rushes in to COFFIN SPLASH Joe! Joe is reeling from the tack attack but Darby fires off tack-covered forearms! Fans fire up as Darby runs corner to corner, but Joe dodges the splash to GAMANGIRI! Joe then wraps up an arm in his towel, to LARIAT Darby down! Fans rally, Joe pulls Darby’s tack hoodie off and throws it away. Joe drags Darby up to CHOP him! Darby goes to a corner, but Darby kicks back. Joe stomps Darby, stomps him down, then storms off.

Joe goes out to look under the ring, and he brings out a TABLE! Dayton fires up, Joe picks the table up, but Darby DIVES into the table and Joe! The table doesn’t break but it, Joe and Darby all hit the floor! Joe is busted open on his forehead and fans fire up! Darby hurries to stand the table up, to then drop it on Joe! Darby then brings the steel steps around into the corner of the railing. Darby whips, Joe reverses, and Darby not only clips steel steps, he clips railing! Darby lands on his feet just from momentum, but he soon falls to his knees, clutching his back! Fans lose their minds while Joe stalks out after Darby.

Joe stands Darby up, throws knees into him, and then throws him into railing. Joe drags Darby up and they go up the bleachers. Joe SMACKS Darby off the handrail, then brings him up further. Joe smacks Darby off more railing, then keeps him going up. But Darby fights back! Darby CLUBS and CLAWS Joe’s back! Fans fire up but Joe DUMPS Darby down the steps! Fans are going nuts while Joe glares through his crimson mask, and Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Joe drags Darby up again, grinds him against the handrail, then SMACKS him off a fan’s chair! They go back to the lower level as Darby kicks Joe and crawls away. Joe keeps after Darby, drags him up, and brings him around the way to TOSS back to ringside! Darby narrowly misses hitting steel steps head first! Joe stalks Darby, drags Darby back up, then scoop SLAMS him on the steps! Darby writhes, flounders away, but Joe follows him to the corner. Darby throws Joe’s ROH World TV title at him, but that only upsets Joe. Joe storms in after Darby, stalks him to a corner, and waits on Darby to stand before he DECKS him!

Joe eggs Darby on as he stands over him. Darby doesn’t stand so Joe makes him. Joe snapmares to CHOP Darby on the back! And PENALTY KICK him in the chest! And then drops a fist on his head! Joe watches Darby writhe and the ref checks on him. Joe grins through the crimson mask, then stomps Darby down. Joe kicks Darby, then clamps on a neck wrench! Joe leans all his weight on Darby but Darby throws body shots. Joe doesn’t budge, and he CLUBS Darby down. Joe grins as Darby tires to sit back up. Joe clamps the neck wrench back on and he twists even harder! Darby endures, and Dynamite returns to single picture as Darby throws more body shots.

Joe lets go of the neck wrench, Darby hobbles and runs, but into an ELBOW! Darby falls over and Joe covers, TWO! Joe keeps focus as he looms over Darby. Joe KICKS Darby to a corner, and then stomps him. Fans rally and duel, but Joe is annoyed by that. Joe drags Darby up, DECKS him with a forearm, then clamps on another neck wrench! It’s practically a vice on Darby’s head, squeezing his skull! Darby endures, fights up, and he RAMS Joe into buckles! Darby fires off forearms and SLAPS! Darby runs corner to corner, but into the URENAGE! Cover, TWO!! Darby survives the #STJOE, but Joe stands Darby up to CHOP him!

Darby staggers, Joe CHOPS him again! Darby flops to the apron, Joe builds speed and he BOOTS Darby to the floor! Joe then storms out and looks under the ring. Joe brings out another TABLE! Fans fire up again but Joe has fans move aside. Fans oblige and Joe rests the table against railing. Darby is in the ring, Joe goes in and brings Darby up, but Darby JAWBREAKERS before the sleeper could lock in! Darby runs in at the corner to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP! Darby CHOPS away on Joe, but Joe TOSSES Darby right out of the ring! Joe has been treating Darby like a throw pillow, emphasis on the “throw!”

Darby flounders up, but Joe goes back over to bring him back in. Joe suplexes high and hard! Joe then goes out to fetch chairs! Joe puts a handful of chairs in the ring, then sets them up together. Fans fire up as they’re back to back to make a wedge! Joe stands Darby up, brings him over, BIG back suplex on the chair wedge!! Darby writhes and Joe has a sadistic smile. “Joe is gonna kill~ you!” Joe turns the chairs around to face each other, then brings Darby back up. But Darby uses POCKET SAND to stop the bomb! CODE RED!! Cover, TWO!! Joe survives but Darby hurries to hop on! THROWBACK STUNNER!

Joe falls into a drop zone, and Darby hurries to get his hoodie back! Darby puts that back on, climbs up the corner, and COFFIN DROPS!! Cover, TWO!?!? Joe survives the tack-enhanced senton and fans can’t believe it! Darby hurries outside and goes looking. Darby uses a knife to cut the strings that hold down the canvas! Some are tough but they all give way, and Darby pulls the canvas away. Darby then drags off the foam padding to expose bare wood! Darby is deconstructing the ring in order to better destroy Joe! Darby sees Joe outside, builds speed and DIVES, but Joe walks away! Darby CRASHES THROUGH THE TABLE!!!

Dayton is losing their minds as Joe puts Darby back in! Joe sets Darby’s tack covered jacket down, he picks Darby up, and he POWERBOMBS him on the tacks! AND THEN HE SMOTHERS DARBY WITH THE TACK JACKET!! Darby DIGS at Joe’s eyes!! Joe lets Darby go, but he staggers around blindly! Joe stands up into a CHAIR SHOT! And another! And another! Darby has Joe on the hard wood, climbs up top, but Joe pushes the ref into the ropes to trip Darby up!! Joe climbs up after Darby, tucks him in, and hits a SUPER MUSCLE BUSTER TO THE WOOD!!!! Cover, JOE WINS!!!

Winner: Samoa Joe, by pinfall (NEW AEW TNT Champion)

Darby’s relentless streak is over! Samoa Joe is now a TWO-TIME TWO BELT CHAMPION! But wait! “THIS IS WAAAR~!” Fans go nuts for Wardlow as he storms down to the ring! Joe is just as shocked as Wardlow runs in! SPEAR!! Wardlow rains down fists on the man who took his title and his top knot! Wardlow rips his shirt off, drags Joe up, but Joe scrambles away! Fans boo but Joe isn’t going to fight again so soon after the war he just went through. Security rushes out but Wardlow CLOBBERS them all! Then he hauls one up to POWERBOMB out onto all the others!! Wardlow will not be denied, when and where will he get his hands on Joe?


My Thoughts:

This was an awesome Dynamite! Same balance of action and talking, but the action was all on a different level this week. Of the talking, we got good stuff out of this AEW Originals VS Imports in the Women’s Division. Saraya & Storm really up their Heel heat by just attacking Britt unprovoked, and then Ruby checking in on Britt was an interesting turnaround from her telling she didn’t want Britt’s help. But we’re getting closer and closer to that big tag(?) match. Hell, make it a Blood & Guts match but with the women rather than the men. Saraya leads a team, Britt leads a team, Ruby will choose Britt’s side and there could even be a twist of Shida betraying Saraya during the match to cost the anti-AEW team.

Good promo from the JAS to set up things with Starks. I just knew Starks would have to beat everyone in the JAS eventually, so it’s clever for them to get it all done in one gauntlet match. Starks will of course make it past Menard and Parker, and I bet that just as it looks like Garcia is stepping up to face Starks, Guevara takes the spotlight from him. Starks will still get through the final opponent, and he’ll get his match with Jericho. Good promo from Mogul Affiliates, because one: it establishes that their group doesn’t like multigenerational wrestlers, and two: it gave Granden Goetzman his wrestler name, “Trench.” Swerve will surely beat BPJ, but I bet Dustin teams up with BPJ and Brock Anderson as a sort of AEW take on WWE’s Legacy faction to take on Mogul Affiliates.

Good promo from Jack Perry, but I’m surprised he waited until now to establish that he’s done with tag teams. But I suppose he’s done with The Firm, too, so he’s done needing reinforcements. As it stands, if he wants a singles title, he could start with the All-Atlantic Championship, but I could see JB making a move for THE AEW World title. Speaking of The Firm, good promo from them and The Elite. I wonder if this was really live or just the take where Nick actually made that shot. Anyway, I’m also surprised the trios match for Rampage is for the titles when the titles are going to be on the line for Dynamite. But I suppose if Orange Cassidy and Darby Allin are fighting champions, then so should the Elite. Which of course means The Elite win on Rampage to go on to face Fox & Flight.

We got an awesome match from Bryan VS Thatcher, but of course Bryan wins to keep his story going. Even after he had that awesome match with Brian Cage, Konosuke going after MJF was a great move. And getting himself an Eliminator match is a good, too, but I feel like MJF finds a way to stand tall. He’ll either cheat to win, or just get himself disqualified quickly so his night will be over quickly. MJF also had a really good promo with LFI. Rush is a great choice to take on Bryan Danielson, and Rush is also going to have a great match with Christopher Daniels on Rampage. I’m sure Bryan will still find a way to win and we’ll still get that Ironman match, it just has to be how this goes.

It’s mostly because I don’t even know who is the #2 contender, since AEW still hasn’t kept up with rankings in this new year. AEW bringing out a sudden twist of MJF still having that One Hour Ironman match against someone other than Bryan would be great stuff, since MJF has been so focused on Bryan, but I feel like getting MJF VS Bryan is still the thing everyone wants to see. Great opening match out of Hangman VS Moxley, and of course Moxley bleeds. It’s practically in his contract. But Hangman losing by a roll-up was a great surprise, and them still being after each other after, this has to continue until Revolution.

The Acclaimed winning a squash was a bit surprising, but obviously that was to make room for the promo that set up things with The Gunn Sons. But Billy suddenly saying his sons can have a title match with The Acclaimed? I hope there isn’t a turn coming where Billy is suddenly on his sons’ side again. It just feels like something is fishy, but who knows. Really good TBS title match from Jade and Velvet, but I guess since this wasn’t at a PPV, Jade wasn’t about to lose. Kiera trying to help Velvet only to mess things up was at least a good detail to protect Jade. But at this rate, who is even going to beat Jade when she’s gotten through even some great established names.

And of course, an awesome No Holds Barred match for the TNT title. Great innovation, such as Darby’s tack covered jacket and the different table spots. I was actually rather surprised to see Joe win this to once again be dual champion. But at the same time, Wardlow returning to continue his story with Joe is a logical reason as to why Joe needs to have the TNT title again. Perhaps Wardlow gets the TNT title back to have a second chance with that, and Darby can move up into the world title scene. And assuming MJF retains at Revolution, it works for Darby to be next as they have history in AEW.

My Score: 9/10


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