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Chairshot Classics: WWE SummerSlam 2007



We see Vince and Coachmen again in their Tiki Room and Regal is telling them the special ladies have arrived. Vince tells him to bring them in and when he does they are revealed to be Mae Young and The Fabulous Moolah. The whole reason for Regal’s hunt for ladies here is because McMahon is looking for someone to have his bastard son. Mae is quick to tackle McMahon with kisses and grind her knee against him. Regal has to yank her off Vince by her hair and drags her from the room. What in the actual fuck is going on here? Coach offers him a Tic-Tac to get the taste out of his mouth but Vince comes around to it and says “It may be a little kinky but I like it.”


Finally the Main Event is upon us and we get a nice vignette to lead us into it. It shows the WWE Champion John Cena and his recent Title fights. First it shows him overcoming the Legend that is Shawn Michaels and then The Punjabi Nightmare that is The Great Khali. Lastly it is his battle with Bobby Lashley at The Great American Bash. This all builds to Coach making Randy Orton the number one contender. Great promo here and besides the Punk/Morrison one this is the only one worth a shit. The challenger Randy Orton enters first and gets some heat from the crowd. Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler get the call for this match, and JR is sure to tell us of all the careers that Orton has “ended”. Shawn Michaels, RVD, Sergeant Slaughter, etc. The crowd is in an absolute frenzy when the WWE Champion John Cena makes his way out quickly to the ring. The place is buzzing as the collar and elbow starts the match and Cena transitions into a side headlock. Orton shoves Cena into the ropes but this avails him nothing as Cena puts him right back into the side headlock after a takedown. When Orton reverses it into a side headlock of his own, the place is shaking. Cena shoves him into the ropes to escape and catches Orton with a drop toe hold. He tries for the STFU but Orton is able to get to the ropes to avoid it. Both men make it to their feet and Orton lands the first punch. He continues to rally behind right hands and knocks Cena from his feet. Orton uses the right hands some more and eventually knocks Cena into the corner with a European uppercut.

When Orton tries to whip Cena to the opposite corner, he reverses it and Orton hits the corner hard. Cena then hits the ropes and nails Orton with the running bulldog. Cena hooks the leg but it only gets a two. They return to their feet and Orton reverses the Irish whip and smashes Cena in the back of the head with a forearm. Its The Viper’s turn to cover Cena, but he kicks out. Cena lands a few punches and hits the ropes. This backfires, because when he tries for the flying forearm, Orton ducks it. Cena crashes to the mat and rolls to the apron to stand back up. Orton hits the ropes now and when he collides with Cena, Cena goes flying into the RAW announce table. Orton is quick to return Cena to the ring and go for a cover. It is still too early and John Cena kicks out. Orton applies the standing side headlock, and after some struggle, he brings Cena to the mat. Just when Cena is looking out of it, he stands up explosively and suplexs Orton. Cena then Charges Orton, who is in the corner, but the Viper dodges this attack and Cena collides with the turnbuckle. Another cover From Randy Orton and another kick-out from John Cena.

Orton takes his time stomping away at the appendages of Cena as the crowd is at war with “Lets go Cena” and “RKO” chants. Orton tries for another pin and when Cena kicks out Orton puts him in yet another side headlock. Cena again stands it up and hits the ropes. When he comes back at Orton he is met by the Viper’s dropkick. Orton hooks the jean shorts for leverage but Cena still breaks free from the pin. Cena tries to rally behind some right hands, but when he hits the ropes Orton puts him into a sleeper hold. Hey Cena, stop hitting the ropes. Cena hip tosses Orton but he keeps the lock applied and transitions into a side headlock. Orton then rolls this into a rear-naked choke and Cena is really selling the choke. Cena finds the strength to stand up with Orton still on his back. This is a funny sight as Orton is much taller than John Cena. Cena then runs backward and rams Orton into the turnbuckle. Cena rallies behind a series of rights and lefts and then catches Orton with a pair of shoulder blocks. He then lifts Orton sky-high for a sidewalk slam variant. The hand raises high and the crowd says “You Cant See Me” as Cena does that world famous hand motion. He catches Orton with the Five Knuckle Shuffle and tries for the FU. When Cena gets Orton up, he counters it with an elbow to Cena’s face. Out of nowhere, Orton hits an inverted backbreaker and the crowd lets out a nice pop for this. Cena rolls to the apron to stand and this leads to Orton apron DDT back into the ring. Orton covers and, as JR says, “Cena reaches down into the depths of his soul to kick-out of that one.”


Randy Orton hits the canvas and starts to prey on Cena with his viper-like taunts. He tries for the RKO but Cena counters it by shoving Orton into the ropes. Cena then charges Orton but he hits the deck, pulling the top rope down with him. This sends Cena soaring from the ring and crashing to the mat. The crowd is going crazy at this point and Orton goes to the outside. He whips Cena into the ring steps and returns him to the ring. Orton again hooks the jean shorts but Cena kicks out again. Cena lands a punch to the midsection and this time when he hits the ropes he catches Orton with a flipping neckbreaker. For some unknown reason Cena takes to the top rope and Orton is quick to meet him there with a few punches. Orton the joins him up there and is trying to superplex Cena. He fights free and shoves Orton to the mat. The crowd erupts when Cena leaps off and nails Orton with the Fame-asser. Cena tries for the FU but Orton grabs the top rope and escapes the finish. Orton lands on the apron and hotshots Cena on the top rope. Orton returns to the ring and is again stalking the prey that is John Cena. Orton tries to punt kick the face of Cena but it is dodged and Cena catches Orton with the drop toe hold. Cena is quick to lock in the STFU and Orton is struggling to get to the ropes. He eventually completes this task and the crowd explodes when the ref frees the hold. Orton strikes with a RKO out of nowhere but is slow to make the cover. The fans count along with the ref and let out a sigh of disappointment when Cena kicks out. Its Cena’s turn to sneak a finisher in and nails the FU. When the crowd counts Cena’s cover they are rewarded with a three count. And John Cena retains the WWE Championship. This is by far the best match on the card and is the first of a long series of battles between these two first ballot Hall of Famers. The two would be in a combined 22 matches between this point in time and 2014. Ten of which were one-on-one matches. Match Time-21:20


This SummerSlam was a disappointment for sure. It would definitely fall into the bottom 50 percent overall of the ones I’ve reviewed to this point. (Those all can be found here.) My three favorite matches and the only ones I would recommend watching are, Cena/Orton, Punk/Morrison and Mysterio/Guerrero. As I always like to do at the end, I see where one Dave Meltzer rated the matches at. These star ratings are acquired via Dave’s highest rated match of the card was the 4 star main event between Cena and Orton. Next and the only one to receive atleast a 3 was Chavo Guerrero and Rey Mysterio. The rest received mediocre 2’s or less. Khali and Batista received a negative 1.5. Overall I have to agree with Meltzer’s assessment here.

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