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Mitchell’s WWE Monday Night Raw Report! (7/30/18)

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The Beast, Brock Lesnar, finally returns to Raw! What will he and his Advocate, Paul Heyman, have to say to The Big Dog ahead of their newest title rematch?

 

All images courtesy of the WWE’s official Twitter

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Finn Balor VS Baron Corbin; Corbin wins.
  • Natalya w/ Ronda Rousey VS Alicia Fox w/ Alexa Bliss; Alicia wins.
  • Braun Strowman VS Jinder Mahal w/ Sunil Singh; Mahal wins, by count-out.
  • Apollo Crews w/ Titus Worldwide VS Akam w/ Rezar; Apollo wins.
  • Seth Rollins VS Drew McIntyre w/ Dolph Ziggler; Rollins wins, by disqualification.
  • The Revival VS The Deleters of Worlds; The Revival wins.
  • Bayley & Sasha Banks VS The Riott Squad; Bayley & Sasha win.

PLAY BY PLAY

WWE and Raw remember Nikolai Volkoff and Brian Christopher.

 

Brock Lesnar IS here!

The Beast and his Advocate are ready.

But Roman Reigns heads to the ring first!

The Big Dog is once again #1 contender to the WWE Universal Championship, aka he gets another shot at Brock Lesnar. Roman still feels he’s the “Uncrowned Universal Champion” after the controversial ending to their Greatest Royal Rumble Steel Cage Match, but he’ll have to fight all over again in Brooklyn to prove it. He hears the energy and the noise, so he gives Miami a quick shout out for that. And shout out to Bobby Lashley, because while Roman said things, after actually facing him, Roman now respects Lashley. But that’s more than he can say for Lesnar, Roman has “zero respect for that fool.” Brock Lesnar never shows up for work, yet he’ll go to the UFC and call out Daniel Cormier. But we saw Lesnar is here, so Roman vows Lesnar won’t run his mouth out in The Yard!

“Ladies and gentlemen, and you, too, Roman Reigns,” Paul Heyman is here to introduce himself and the “reigning, defending, undisputed Universal Heavyweight Champion, BROCK! LESNAR!” But please forgive him, Lesnar has authorized Heyman to give Roman “profound congratulations” over his win over Lashley to earn another shot at The Beast at Summerslam. But from Heyman brings up the definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over and over again, expecting different results. With all due respect, Roman should be in a padded cell, not the ring at Summerslam. Roman can go on and on and on about the Spear that sent Lesnar through the cage, but mark Heyman’s words, he’s giving another SPOILER: Summerslam will see Lesnar put down the Big Dog and then go to the UFC to become a two sport champion!

“Just shut up, Paul.” Roman doesn’t care about any of that. He and the fans want Lesnar, so bring him out. Heyman reminds us that Lesnar is here in Miami, sitting in the comfort of his private locker room. Lesnar will come out to ringside, when and IF he feels like it. But don’t worry, Roman, because at Summerslam, Lesnar will- Will what? What’s he gonna do? Actually show up? For that matter, IF he shows up, Roman will send Lesnar back to the UFC, but not as The Beast. Lesnar goes back as The Bitch. The Big Dog’s bark is as bad as his bite, but is he barking up the wrong tree?

 

Brock Lesnar lounges in his locker room.

Paul Heyman returns in a huff over what Roman said. Lesnar didn’t hear what Roman said, because he doesn’t watch Raw. Why would he? Well, because of what Roman just said! Heyman pulls up the tweets all about it. Lesnar chucks the phone! The Beast doesn’t care, he just wants to read his magazine. Is Lesnar taking it too easy?

 

Finn Balor VS Baron Corbin!

The Extraordinary Man has taken the Constable’s insults and mistreatment all in stride, and that only irritates Stephanie McMahon’s appointed authority figure more. Will a rematch from Extreme Rules settle things between the “Big” Bad Lone Wolf and “Little” Finn?

The bell rings and the two men circle. Corbin tosses the vest off to tie up with Finn, then powers Finn to a corner. He backs off at the ref’s count but gives Finn a shove. Finn gives Corbin forearms! Corbin throws Finn out but Finn lands on his feet. Finn comes back in to throw more forearms. Corbin knees low then throws Finn out again. Finn gets back in again to throw more forearms. He puts on a headlock and holds on as Corbin tries to power out. Corbin endures the grind, then lifts Finn up. Finn brings Corbin back down, and fans rally behind him. Corbin fights out then powers out to run Finn over with a back elbow. Corbin drags Finn up to a corner, then to the top rope for forearms of his own. Finn hits back, then hits a missile dropkick!

Corbin rolls out, but Finn comes around the corner to run him over! Fans fire up and Finn goes back. Corbin puts Finn in the ring, but Finn is right on Corbin with stomps and haymakers. Finn drags Corbin up but is put in a corner. Corbin throws more forearms, then throws Finn at buckles. Finn evades but Corbin grabs him on the apron. Finn blocks then gives tries but Corbin blocks. Corbin clobbers Finn to the floor! Finn is dazed while we go to break.

Raw returns and Corbin whips Finn hard corner to corner. Corbin puts Finn in a half nelson and thrashes him about. Fans rally up for Finn, and Finn feeds off the energy. Corbin wrangles Finn back down, wrenching on the chinbar. Finn endures more thrashing, and works his way back up. Finn fights out of the hold with haymakers, but Corbin powers him into a corner. Corbin runs in but Finn evades. Corbin slides out then in and clobbers Finn all over again! Cover, TWO! Corbin is furious while Finn checks his jaw. Corbin stomps Finn, then snarls as he drags Finn up. He puts Finn in a corner, and rocks him with heavy rights. Corbin sits Finn up for another chinlock, grinding Finn down to the mat. Fans rally up again and Finn gets back up.

Finn pries Corbin’s fingers apart, but Corbin knees low. Corbin runs, but into a dropkick! Corbin goes outside, but Finn keeps on him. Finn tries to bring Corbin up, but Corbin throws a stiff right hand! Corbin then lifts Finn for an apron back suplex! Finn writhes while Corbin catches his breath. Fans boo and jeer but that only makes Corbin grin. Corbin looms over Finn, daring him to get up. He drags Finn up, preparing a powerbomb, but Finn slips out! Finn gets the takedown for the double stomp! Corbin gets up but Finn puts him in a corner. Finn chops Corbin, whips but Corbin reverses, only for Finn to go up and over. Finn runs into a boot but gives a swing kick! Corbin tumbles out, but Finn takes aim to FLY! Finn wipes Corbin out while we go to break!

Raw returns again, and Corbin has Finn back in the chinbar half nelson. Fans boo but Corbin again just grins. Finn endures as Corbin thrashes him around again. Finn gets up and fights back, but Corbin wrangles him back down. Fans rally up and Finn feeds off their energy. Finn fights back one more time, but Corbin shoves him. Finn kicks on the rebound, but his Slingblade is denied. Corbin shoves Finn again and catches him around the throat. Corbin lifts but Finn slips out to victory roll! TWO, but Slingblade! Finn aims at Corbin from across the way, but runs into the Choke Slam Backbreaker! Cover, TWO! Corbin is furious as he rains down rights. Corbin stands over Finn, toying with him while fans chant “Corbin Sucks!” He drags Finn up and reel shim in, but Finn counters with a DDT!

Finn evades from a corner then swing kicks Corbin down. Finn goes up and fans fire up! Corbin gets up and avoids the stomps, then counters a slingblade with DEEP SIX! Cover, TWO! The Constable is beside himself. Finn drags himself up, and Corbin runs in for a big corner clothesline. Corbin gives another, but then Finn evades the third. Finn wrecks Corbin with a dropkick! Corbin is stunned, and he gets blasted by the dropkick! Finn puts Corbin back in, and blasts him again! Corbin falls, and Finn goes up! Finn aims, but Corbin rolls out of the way, End of Days!! Corbin covers, Corbin wins!

Winner: Baron Corbin, by pinfall

The Constable pulls off a win by the skin of his teeth, and the score is now 1-1. But Corbin isn’t finished with Finn yet! He drags Finn up but Finn fights back. Corbin knees Finn low and throws him out! Corbin bashes Finn’s face into the barrier! Finn slumps down while Corbin feels even better about his victory. Will there be a tiebreaker in the near future? Or will Corbin quit picking on Finn while he’s ahead?

 

Paul Heyman needs a phone.

But before he can get one, Kurt Angle walks over to him. Lesnar was to appear, by contractual obligation! Heyman points out that his client that the obligation was fulfilled by just showing up. If Angle wants more, then go to Lesnar’s locker room. This is not Heyman’s problem, it’s Angle’s. Angle turns that around and says that Heyman is also under contract, and that contract is under Angle’s control. If Lesnar doesn’t go to the ring, both their contracts are terminated. Really? Really. Seriously? Deadly serious. Will the Advocate be able to convince his Beast this is something he needs to do?

 

Raw recaps last week’s historic announcement.

With Vince McMahon, Stephanie McMahon and Triple H in the ring, and with all the superstars of Raw, SmackDown and even NXT, it was announced. Another first-time-ever event will take place. It will be the first-ever ALL WOMEN’S PAY-PER-VIEW! The Women’s (R)Evolution culminates on October 28th with WWE Evolution!

 

Alicia Fox prepares backstage.

Alexa Bliss walks over to talk. Mickie James got hurt, which is why Alicia gets to take on the Queen of Harts. Of course, the “over-hyped rookie” is out of “detention”, so she’ll be around. But don’t worry, “the champ” will take Ronda, Foxy can handle Natty. Alicia is a trailblazer, and ahead of WWE Evolution, this can be Alicia’s chance to shine! So is she with The Goddess? Alicia will hurt Natty so bad, even her cats say “meow!” Get it?! MROW! The Foxy is ready to show her claws, and that match is next!

 

Natalya w/ Ronda Rousey VS Alicia Fox w/ Alexa Bliss!

It’s a showdown of former Women’s Champions, but both sides have back-up! Natty has Rowdy Ronda Rousey with her while Ms. Crazy Like a Fox has the Raw Women’s Champion. Ronda and Alexa are set to fight for the title at Summerslam, whose proxy will get big points on the Road to Evolution?

The bell rings and the two circle. They tie up and Natty gets a headlock takeover, but Alicia gets the headscissors. Natty pops out and the two circle again. They tie up and Natty gets another headlock. Alicia powers out but Natty runs her over. Natty runs but things speed up. Natty gets around and rolls Alicia up, TWO. Alicia flounders to a corner, then back elbows back. Alicia hops up, bumps Natty off buckles and sunset flips for a cover. TWO, and Natty goes after legs! Alicia struggles and gets a ropebreak. Natty lets her go while Alicia slips out of the ring. The referee has Alexa stay back, but Alicia trips Natty up on her own! She uses the apron to blind Natty as she furiously attacks! Alicia puts Natty in before the 10 count, then covers, TWO!

Alicia keeps on Natty and Natty’s bad leg. She wraps a chinlock on Natty, but Ronda and the fans rally up. Natty gets up but Alicia throws her back down. Alexa applauds the wily Alicia as she kicks Natty. Alicia mocks Ronda, then clubs Natty. Alicia grabs Natty for a standing armlock, almost an abdominal stretch. Ronda coaches Natty on, but Alicia adds bodyscissors for a floating armbar. Fans rally up again and Natty powers out! Alicia comes back with a big lariat, and Alexa mocks Natty. Alicia walks into a back elbow, then a kick. Natty blocks Alicia’s kick to throw her down on her face. Natty runs, walks all over Alicia then hits the basement dropkick! She clobbers Alicia with a clothesline, covers, TWO! Natty grabs Alicia bot Alicia pushes Natty for a Thesz Press! Cover, TWO! Alicia brings Natty up, Northern Lights, TWO!

Foxy grows frustrated, but then she swipes at Ronda! Ronda swipes back, Alexa gets a cheap shot on Natty! Alicia hits a big boot! Cover while Ronda protests, but Alicia wins!

Winner: Alicia Fox, by pinfall

Ronda’s rage boils over, she goes after Alexa! She chases Alexa into the ring, judo throw! Alicia saves Alexa from the armbar, only for Ronda to give Alicia the Rowdy Slam! Ronda isn’t done, she glares at Alexa, and intercepts her exit over the barriers! Alexa crawls away, but Alicia is back with a blindside attack! Alicia puts Ronda into barriers, then again! Alexa and Alicia have only angered Ronda more, so they retreat before Ronda can get up again. The Goddess and Foxy got the better of Ronda and Natty for now. Will there be retribution in Brooklyn?

 

Lesnar still lounges.

But Heyman theorizes a “total reverse of concept.” Maybe Lesnar goes out to the ring? First off, t-shirt sales! Network subscriptions! And promoting the UFC championship bout! That’s easy money all over! Heyman felt the love for The Beast. If Lesnar goes out for even just a minute, Miami will give Lesnar the “Conquering Hero’s Welcome” he deserves. Lesnar says Heyman has no idea how annoying he’s being. Lesnar doesn’t give a damn about the WWE Universe. He’d rather be on his couch, in his house. Go get a steak, medium-well with a baked potato and steamed broccoli. Go! Lesnar is treating his Advocate more like a butler. Will that last much longer if they’re both released?

 

Ronda and Natty talk with Angle.

Ronda is tired of Alexa using friends and lackeys! Don’t suspend Ronda over what she did, but she had to do something. Angle says Ronda will get her first ever match on Raw against Alicia Fox! They thank Angle. It’s great to be back for Ronda, but will she be ready in a week’s time?

 

“Ladies and Gentlemen: Elias.”

The Drifter is in Miami, and Miami is happy to see him. As always, he plays his guitar, and asks, “Who Wants to Walk With Elias?!” Miami seems up for it. Elias has done it, he has dropped the greatest album of all time! Elias changes people’s lives as they hear his voice. He even beat out some of the top artists and bands, even Taylor Swift! Amen! “And it’s all because of one reason”, it is what the world knows: WWE really stands for “Walk With Elias!” Truthfully, Elias could’ve gone even higher on the charts, but he was interrupted by Bobby Lashley. Maybe Lashley was in a hurry to lose to Roman?

Miami, don’t just get on the bandwagon now. This is the same city that worships Pitbull and The Rock. Fans chant “Rocky! Rocky!” after that one. The Rock doesn’t want to take on Elias. Elias has a song, so silence phones, hold applause and shut mouths! But speaking of Bobby Lashley, here he comes!

Okay, cut Lashley’s music already! What’s Lashley doing out here? Lashley’s a big fan, and he heard his name, so he wanted a front row seat. Is that so? Well no matter what Lashley says, Elias sees through him. Lashley isn’t here to Walk With Elias, he wants to sing with Elias! No, no, Lashley is a fighter, not a singer. But Elias gets Miami’s opinion: do you want to see Lashley sing with Elias? “YES! YES!” In that case, one night only, Elias and Lashley! Elias will keep it slow and simple like Lashley himself, so try to keep up. Just start when you feel it.

Elias plays, Rockin’ Robin! Tweet tweet, Rockin’ Robin. Lashley sings, but Elias blindsides him! Elias stomps Lashley out, then pushes his stool aside. Elias ain’t letting it happen like that! But neither is Lashley, as he rocks Elias before throwing him! Elias rolls out of the ring to run away, but Lashley holds down the ring. The duet wasn’t much, but how about a fight the next time they meet?

 

Baron Corbin meets Kevin Owens backstage.

Great job wiping the smile off Finn’s face. Kevin clearly kisses up to Corbin, because with Braun Strowman falling out of his family’s grace, Constable Corbin is Kevin’s son’s newest favorite wrestler. Finally, a male authority figure in WWE they can look up to! That’s what Corbin is here to do: inspire. Speaking of authority, Kevin knows the Lesnar situation is concerning. Angle is disrespecting Stephanie’s authority by trying to put Lesnar in the cross-hairs of Strowman’s MITB contract! That’s not fair, so maybe the Constable can do something. Corbin will look into it, but Lesnar is Angle’s problem and Strowman having the contract is Kevin’s. Kevin’s plan didn’t go quite the way he hoped, but will there be anything to worry about before the night’s through?

 

Braun Strowman VS Jinder Mahal w/ Sunil Singh!

The Monster Among Men was told the Modern Day Maharaja would be his anger management coach, but Strowman says he has his anger completely under control. It’s just that he uses it as his weapon, as he demonstrated when he threw both Mahal & Singh out of the ring last week. Will Mahal be able to maintain inner peace with the Monster barreling down on him? Or will he #GetTheseHands?

The bell rings and Mahal wants Strowman to take it easy. He tries his mantra of “Shanti~!”, but the chants of “Get These Hands!” overpowers it. Strowman then overpowers Mahal by pushing him to the mat! Strowman roars while Mahal backs to a corner. Mahal still tries to reason with him, but that’s so Strowman doesn’t see Kevin try to steal the briefcase! Strowman clobbers Mahal, then goes after Kevin. Kevin cowers back towards the timekeeper’s area, then runs! Strowman chases him down, Kevin tosses the briefcase to Sunil Singh, and Strowman PLASTERS Singh into the barriers. Strowman picks his briefcase up and chases Kevin backstage! But that’s a 10 count! Mahal wins!

Winner: Jinder Mahal, by count-out.

Mahal wins, but Strowman rushes back up to the ring. Strowman could officially lose his briefcase if something like this happens at Summerslam. Will the Monster in the Bank be able to avoid all the tricks in the Prizefighter’s playbook in Brooklyn?

 

Kurt Angle sees what just happened.

Baron Corbin comes in to give Angle a phone. It’s Stephanie. She knows how this will look, right? The live crowd will be very upset. She doesn’t care, so long as the Summerslam main event remains intact. But there has to be some other way. Angle accepts her orders, but what did she tell him to do? Or rather, what did she say not to do?

 

Mojo Rawley walks into the Raw Men’s Locker Room.

His Killer Instinct sees everyone else as “chumps.” Mojo’s been running through them relentlessly. He doesn’t hide behind keyboards, he calls people out for real. Tyler Breeze doubted Mojo. No Way Jose doubted Mojo. He relegated them both back to catering, like he did Zack Ryder not too long ago. But in walks Bobby Roode. A fantastic speech, Mojo. But if he’s in the mood to talk, Roode will ask him: “You got a problem with me?” What would Bobby do about him? Catchphrase him into submission? No, Roode TACKLES Mojo! The others watch as the two scrap it out on the floor, but then referees and security separate them! Things are tense backstage, what will happen when Mojo and Roode meet in the ring?

 

Apollo Crews w/ Titus Worldwide VS Akam w/ Rezar!

A rare occurrence is happening for the Authors of Pain: one of them is competing in singles action! But alone or together, the AoP warn all of the Raw Tag Team Division that while Titus and team will regret refusing the chance to bow out peacefully. Akam will not be so polite with Apollo. The book will be slammed shut, but will it be a bad ending for Titus’ star?

The bell rings and Akam gets a takedown. The two grapple and Akam puts Apollo in a corner to then throw him out of it! Akam trash talks in Punjabi, then throws Apollo again! Dana and Titus coach Apollo but he gets caught in a facelock. Akam puts Apollo in a cobra clutch but a rally builds. Apollo gets up and jawbreakers out, then sunset flips over. Akam rolls through but Apollo kicks, mule kicks, and runs to boot! Akam staggers and runs into the leaping lariat from Apollo! Apollo enziguris and standing moonsaults! TWO, but Apollo isn’t done yet. He drags Akam up but Akam throws him off! Akam runs in but hits buckles! Roll up, Apollo wins!!

Winner: Apollo Crews, by pinfall

The Authors of Pain are clearly not used to fighting alone, and that becomes a deciding factor. This was the first loss in a long time for AoP, will they be able to right the story back their way?

 

Seth Rollins VS Drew McIntyre w/ Dolph Ziggler!

The Architect is ready to #BurnItDown as he gets payback on the Scottish Terminator who screwed him out of being the Intercontinental Champion at Extreme Rules. Rollins still gets another shot at the Show-Off at Summerslam, so can he eliminate a major obstacle before then?

The bell rings and they tie up right away. McIntyre puts Rollins in a corner, then stomps away. Fans are hotly behind Rollins while he staggers away. McIntyre throws more hands, then whips Rollins corner to corner. Rollins goes up and over to chop and punch back. McIntyre shoves Rollins but Rollins leaps, only to be caught into a suplex! Rollins gets to the apron but McIntyre pursues. McIntyre looks under the ring, but Rollins pushes him into barriers. Rollins gets up, builds speed and DIVES! Only to be caught and thrown into barriers! McIntyre improvises and catapults Rollins into the steel! Rollins gasps for air while we go to break.

Raw returns, and McIntyre glares at Rollins as he climbs back up. Rollins runs and dropkicks McIntyre off the apron! Rollins builds speed, and DIVES! This time it hits, so Rollins hits another DIVE! Fans are fired up as Rollins thinks about further payback. He exposes the bars under the ring, to throw McIntyre into them! They go back in the ring, and Rollins aims at McIntyre. Rollins runs in for the forearm smash, then suplexes him. McIntyre resists but Rollins fights out. Rollins runs but into a tilt-o-whirl. He lands on his feet from it, to then Falcon Arrow McIntyre! Cover, TWO! Ziggler grows panicked on the outside as Rollins grits his teeth and gets back up. Rollins stomps, “Burn It Down!” Mule kick, then the run, but into a spinebuster! Cover, TWO!

Both men are down from exhaustion, but McIntyre grits his teeth now. McIntyre stands first, then drags Rollins up. McIntyre double underhooks but Rollins slips out to enziguri. Rollins misses, and ends up in a deadlift gutwrench! Rollins fights out to huricarana and SUPERKICK! McIntyre dares him to do more, so Rollins SUPERKICKS him again! Rollins hurries up top, but McIntyre stops him. McIntyre chops Rollins, then climbs up to join him. McIntyre positions Rollins, SUPER EMERALD FUSION!

Cover, TWO! McIntyre and Ziggler can’t understand how, but fans are still cheering for Rollins. “This is Awesome!” as Rollins rolls away. McIntyre aims, rams him into the ropes, then swings him with the inverted- No, Rollins Victory Roll! TWO! CURB STOMP! But Ziggler attacks!

Winner: Seth Rollins, by disqualification

The Show-Off will not allow Rollins to win cleanly. He drags Rollins up, but Rollins turns it around! Ziggler gets up and elbows Rollins, but Rollins denies the Zig-Zag! Rollins clotheslines Ziggler out to then DIVE on him! The Kingslayer gets the win and the better of both men. Will Rollins finally get the better of them with the belt on the line in Brooklyn?

 

Kurt Angle and Baron Corbin visit Roman Reigns backstage.

Angle tells Roman that Stephanie McMahon called, and with Lesnar heading out to the ring later, they need to remove Roman from the building. Who cares what Stephanie said? She’s not here. But it’ll cost Roman his Universal Championship opportunity if he doesn’t leave. When’s this gonna stop? Roman gets the pressures of the job, but Angle’s been in Roman’s position. Yes, he has. They’re both dogs, champions, and have felt pressure. But Roman isn’t some Yes Man. That’s fine by Corbin, he has police ready to escort Roman out. Roman has no choice now, but he dose get a shot in on Corbin first! Will The Big Dog pay for hitting Stephanie’s Lone Wolf?

 

Charly Caruso interviews The B-Team in the ring.

The “undefeated” Raw Tag Team Champions have done what no one ever imagined, including themselves. They have defeated the Deleters of Worlds time and again. It was thanks to chaos and luck, but that still angered WOKEN Hardy & Bray Wyatt. Bo Dallas & Curt Axel renamed themselves and have become the best. The B in “B-Team” stands for Dream! Huh? Their point is that they feel like they’re living their dreams. And they never want to wake up! The support of their B Teammates in the WWE Universe is overwhelming! Thank you! But Hardy & Wyatt aren’t as happy about this. Yes, it was weird. They applaud Bo & Axel, then attack? What’s with that? They’re sore losers! But the B Team ain’t scared, they’re champions! They can beat anyone!

So the Deleters appear! Bo & Axel are scared, and Charly gives them all the ring. Hardy speaks, saying “you’re success is a cosmic anomaly!” The balance of the universe is off, and it is up to Hardy & Wyatt to correct it. The B Team talks about dreams as if they mean something? Dreams are fleeting. They cannot be touched, but nightmares are very real. They’re made of insecurities and fears. The Deleters are their nightmares manifested, ye-e-e-e-es. They will haunt The B Team until they are DELETED! But wait, here comes The Revival!

The #TopGuys aren’t letting this happen. Bray, Matt, nothing you said made sense. And more than that, how are these four atop the Raw Tag Team Division? News Flash: Dash & Dawson defeated Lashley & Roman! Therefore, Matt, Bray, move aside and let some real contenders get the job done. Bo & Axel speak up, saying that they will be more than happy to step aside to let the Revival talk to Matt & Bray. But then Bray shoves Bo and a fight breaks out! The B Team gets away, but the Deleters throw Dash & Dawson out! With two teams wanting the B Team’s titles, will the B soon stand for former champions?

 

The Revival VS The Deleters of Worlds!

That brawl from before has now become a full on match as Dash & Dawson go up against Hardy & Wyatt for the first time ever. Raw returns as Hardy bumps Dash’s head off buckles, “DELETE! DELETE!” The B-Team is on commentary watching this to watch their contenders beat each other up. Wyatt tags in and together back drops Dash with Hardy. Wyatt goes to a corner, and Spider Walks over! Dash panics, and he runs into a headbutt. Wyatt tags Hardy, then adds a headbutt to Hardy’s leg sweep. Cover, TWO. Hardy brings Dash up but Dash fights back. Dash puts Hardy in a corner but Hardy fights his way out. Hardy can’t get away as Dash tags Dawson. They hit Hardy with Boston Crab leg drops!

Fans rally for the Deleters while Dawson clobbers Hardy down. Cover, TWO, but Dawson keeps on Hardy with a chinlock. Hardy feeds off the fan energy, but Dash tags back in. hardy throws Dawson ff only fro Dash to grab him in a chinlock. The B Team gives them credit for being a great team. Dash throws Hardy down by his hair, cover, TWO. Dash puts a chinlock back on, but Hardy fights out again. Hardy jawbreakers, but Dash tags Dawson. Dawson intercepts Hardy but gets a Side Effect! Both men are down and crawl for their corners. Hot tags to Dash and Bray! Wyatt rallies on Dash, then clobbers Dawson. Wyatt goes corner to corner for a corner splash. Then he hits the body check! Wyatt grabs Dash but Dawson flies in. Dawson and Dash double team, but Wyatt fights them off.

Wyatt grabs Dash but Dawson dropkicks him down. Hardy comes in and throws Dawson out. He goes to Twist but Dawson rams him into barriers. Dash kicks Bray but Bray clobbers him down again. He prepares Sister Abigail, but Dash pulls hair to get out of it. Dawson tags in, and SHATTER MACHINE! Cover, The Revival wins!

Winners: The Revival, by pinfall

The B Team is surprised to see this, but they’re not afraid of taking on these two #TopGuys. Will Dash & Dawson #SayYeah after finally getting their shot at the titles?

 

Backstage interview with Seth Rollins.

The Architect overcame numbers, but it must be so exhausting to do it all alone. It is, but what Dolph & Drew don’t understand is that there’s no quit in Rollins. Rollins will stop at nothing to win that title back. But then Ziggler and McIntyre attack from behind! They beat him down 2v1, wanting to make sure Rollins is worse for wear. If this continues, will Rollins even make it to Summerslam?

 

Bayley & Sasha Banks VS The Riott Squad!

The Squad is still without its leader, but the Juvenile Delinquent & the Country Viking are still a strong duo. Meanwhile, the Huggable One and the Legit Boss only just reunited as friends. Will the repaired bond of the “Boss & Hug Connection” hold up against the perfectly stable bond between the unstable Liv & Sarah?

The bell rings and Bayley starts against Sarah Logan. They tie up, and Sarah gets a waistlock. She throws Bayley down, then looms over her. Sarah grabs an arm to wrench it, but Bayley stands up. Sarah wrenches again but Bayley reverses to a takedown. Bayley has a leg, then puts Sarah in her corner. Tag to Sasha, and the #LegitHuggable duo throw Sarah backwards. Bayley snapmares and Sasha adds double knees. Cover, TWO! Sasha goes after Sarah’s arm now, but Sarah stands up. Sasha wrenches then goes acrobatic for an arm-drag! She dropkicks Sarah down, cover, TWO! Sasha drags Sarah back over, tag to Bayley. Bayley rolls Sarah up, TWO.

Bayley brings Sarah up but Sarah fights back. Sarah runs in but is snake eye’d on the buckles. Bayley runs while Sasha tags in, BIG knee for Sarah in the corner. Then on the apron, Sasha gives more double knees! Liv protests but the reunited duo is in control while we go to break.

Raw returns and now Sarah has Sasha in a cobra clutch. She grinds Sasha down but Bayley and the fans rally up. Sasha feeds off that energy and throws Sarah off. She runs but is kept away from Bayley. Sarah powers Sasha all the way over, and tags to Liv. Liv climbs up for Sarah to throw Sasha into her knees. Liv adds a tornado facebuster, covers, TWO! Fans rally while Liv thrashes Sasha around in a chinlock. Liv tries to drown it out with her shrieks, but Sasha still gets up. Sasha fights out and then rolls Liv up, TWO. Liv tackles Sasha down to prevent a tag. Liv drags Sasha up but Sasha throws her off into ropes! Hot tag to Bayley!

Bayley throws Liv to the apron then hotshots her. She keeps moving to Thesz Press and fast hands! Bayley runs to knee Liv in the face! She hits Sarah for good measure, then runs in for shoulder tackle and the wacky waving elbow! Bayley goes in for another but gets a knee from Liv! Liv hops up, but Bayley stops her with a forearm. Bayley climbs up and Sasha tags in. SUPER Steiner throws Liv, for Sasha’s SUPER Meteora! Cover, but Sarah breaks it up! Bayley throws Sarah out, then gets back to her corner. Sasha and Liv crawl around, and Sasha drags Liv up. Jawbreaker but Bayley tags in. Sasha Backstabber into the Bayley2Belly! Cover, Boss & Hug Connection wins!

Winners: Bayley & Sasha, by pinfall

The bond is stronger than ever, and that leads to victory! With WWE Evolution still on the horizon, can this renewed friendship lead them to something big?

 

Lesnar still lounges.

But Heyman barges back in. The show’s almost over. They go out, Lesnar bows and waves, hello good-bye, and they’re in a private steakhouse in 25 minutes. And what could go wrong? Roman is removed from the arena! Lesnar thinks it over. Are they getting paid? Of course they are! Lesnar showed up, the contract obligations were met. But to put it bluntly, they have a contract as client and manager, but there’s the WWE contracts they have to worry about. If Lesnar doesn’t go out, they’re both fired. Heyman begs Lesnar to just go out for a minute. If not as a client, than as a friend.

Lesnar stands up, and grabs Heyman! They’re not friends. Heyman works for Lesnar, not the other way around! Understood? Yes… By the way, how long has Heyman been leaching off him? Heyman needs to do his job, got it? Yes, sir… Heyman hurries away from the tyrant Beast. Is Lesnar honoring his contract? What could possibly go wrong?

 

Kurt Angle and Baron Corbin head to the ring.

The Raw GM and Constable pave the way for this make or break moment. Angle calls Heyman out to bring Lesnar out, and reminds them that Roman Reigns has been removed from the building. If Heyman and Lesnar don’t appear, it’s their last night on Raw. Heyman reluctantly comes out, sweating bullets. His introduction is far from its usual enthusiastic tone. He joins Angle and Corbin in the ring while fans sing, “Nana na na, Hey Hey Hey~, Good Bye!” Heyman lets us know his client refuses to walk out to the ring. Angle has had enough! A real champion shows up!! A real champion defends his title at all costs, and goes the extra mile. Real champions do charity work! But Lesnar does none of that! Lesnar is the worst champion of all time! Fans agree with that!

Heyman won’t argue with Angle, because yes, Lesnar is the worst. And Heyman tried to help Lesnar, tried to mold him into not just a UFC fighter but a WWE superstar! But Lesnar barely respects anyone, and barley tolerates Heyman! Heyman wanted to make Lesnar more like Angle, who was a Gold Medalist, legendary superstar and now GM of Raw! So if Angle has someone to punish, it’s not Heyman, but Brock Lesnar! Angle’s pretty sure Heyman’s full of crap. Heyman is genuine, though! He’s tried and tried and tried! But Lesnar doesn’t care! Lesnar doesn’t respect anyone here! But Heyman respects Angle. Heyman would like a better working relationship. No, their contracts are TERMINATED! Get off him! Heyman crawls and begs, but here comes Lesnar! The Beast isn’t about to be fired like that. He heads down to the ring and Heyman is thankfully joyful now.

Lesnar takes his time pacing about the ring before entering. He puts his championship belt on Heyman’s shoulder before speaking. “Do you have a problem with me?” He asks that to both Angle and Corbin. Then he gives Angle an F5!! Corbin is slowly backing away. Lesnar looms over Angle, and Heyman grins. The Beast takes his belt back and slings it over his shoulder. But then he grabs Heyman by the jaw! “Look at him! You see that?!” Lesnar pins Heyman to the mat and Heyman begs him to stop, he can’t breathe. Lesnar shows his Advocate mercy, for now. The Beast has become a tyrant, can Roman Reigns hope to dethrone him once and for all?

 


 

My Thoughts:

What a filler of a Raw. While Raw really played up the uncaring Heel Lesnar to great levels, they did not at all capitalize on what they could’ve done tonight to save fans from Vince’s fantasy. Of course, Vince doesn’t care about us, he already has so much money coming in from television networks. But that’s a rant for another article. What I’m getting at is that logically speaking, Braun Strowman should’ve appeared at the end to go after Lesnar to attempt a MITB Cash-In. But because WWE wants to preserve their match card in both kayfabe and reality, that didn’t happen. Strowman still runs the risk of losing that briefcase to Kevin Owens should shenanigans happen like in Strowman VS Mahal. I would hope WWE doesn’t do that, but you can’t trust Vince anymore.

Then almost every match, if not all of them, barely mattered. Corbin ties his series with Finn in a good match, so I guess that means they’ll continue into Summerslam. Alicia subs in for Mickie and wins thanks to Alexa, but that match would’ve probably gone the same if Mickie wasn’t hurt. Ronda VS Alicia next week will be some fun, though, assuming that even ends cleanly. Titus Worldwide VS AoP is continuing with singles matches, it seems. This is still just a hold over feud for AoP, I’m pretty sure they’ll be in the Raw Tag Title scene after Summerslam. It’s good The Revival got a win over Deleters of Worlds, but I’m starting to think we’re getting a Triple Threat for the titles. I’d go with that, and perhaps it unites B Team & Deleters against Dash & Dawson. Just whatever gets us to Bo & Bray Wyatt Brothers.

Rollins VS McIntyre was turning into another great match, but it just had to have a Heel attack finish. Then there’s the blindside attack backstage. If this isn’t leading to Dean Ambrose coming back to help Rollins, I’m not sure what it could be. At the same time, there is talk of a change to the Intercontinental Championship match, so that seems intriguing. Elias VS Lashley is being established, and this will be another easy win for Lashley. Maybe WWE will wise up and give him some kind of title soon. Oddly enough, I think Bayley-Sasha VS Riott Squad was the highlight for both live and home audiences. WWE missed an opportunity not calling the team “Legit Huggable” but oh well. It’s at least a sign that they’re on the way to a Women’s Tag Division, eventually.

My Score: 7.7/10

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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Live Results & Report! (12/11/18)

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SmackDown brings us a Wrestlemania Rematch this close to TLC! The Queen ended the Empress of Tomorrow’s undefeated streak, but will history repeat itself?

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Daniel Bryan VS Mustafa Ali; Bryan wins.
  • The Miz & Shane McMahon VS Chip & Chad; The Miz & Shane win.
  • Samoa Joe & Shinsuke Nakamura VS Jeff Hardy & Rusev w/ Lana; Hardy & Rusev win.
  • Charlotte Flair VS Asuka; Asuka wins, by disqualification.

PLAY BY PLAY

Daniel Bryan heads to the ring!

Or should we say, the new Daniel Bryan. Either way, the WWE Championship will be on the line against the Phenomenal AJ Styles. However, it’s a minor miracle Styles can even compete after what this Daniel Bryan did to his leg at the end of last week. Fans boo and jeer this Bryan as he picks up a mic. Bryan recalls calling the WWE Universe a bunch of sheep. He wants to apologize for that. Bryan wants to apologize to sheep. Sheep don’t deserve to be compared to such idiots! They’re not the ones destroying the planet with endless consumption. It’s not a “carbon hoof print.” The fans aren’t sheep. They’re parasites! Fans disagree, and believe “Daniel Sucks!” He just calls them fickle.

As he was saying, fans are parasites because they take and take and give nothing in return, especially in Las Vegas. But Bryan isn’t surprised, because fans latched on tot he Old Bryan and lived vicariously through him. That’s what the Yes Movement really was. “Well guess what? The Old Daniel Bryan is dead! And the Yes Movement is dead!” But just like any parasite, the fans have moved on to a new “fickle field”. And these idiots all sit on the couch in the House that AJ Styles Built. Fans cheer for Styles, but Bryan reminds us he is the WWE Champion! And at TLC, Bryan vows to crush Styles’ dream of reclaiming the title, and then the announcement will be “Still WWE Champion, the NEW Daniel Bryan!”

Do fans not believe him? “No! No!” Well Bryan debates with friends all the time, “sometimes you don’t know whether your’e stupid or you deliberately pull the wool over your eyes so you don’t have to realize the facts.” Stupidity is the deliberate cultivation of ignorance. Like in Vegas! But wait, here comes Bryan’s opponent for tonight, the Beacon of Light, Mustafa Ali! Ali responds to Bryan with an introduction, but Bryan already knows who he is. The idiot fans might not but Bryan does. And he knows they’re having a match later, but Ali can join him now. Bryan gives Ali an introduction, and it seems fans do know who he is. Ali is the Heart of 205 Live, and is an incredible performer. Bryan sees a lot of his former self in Ali.

So Bryan gives Ali advice: they don’t need to have this match tonight. Bryan tells Ali that the fans won’t care, “they’re too self-absorbed” and xenophobic. These fickle fans do not deserve this great match. Fans boo so Bryan calls them all fickle. But Ali wants to know what happened to Bryan. Bryan inspired wrestlers like Ali to become a superstar. The entire 205 Live roster looks up to Bryan because Bryan stood toe to toe with any giant and proved he had heart. So what happened? Bryan talks about the Old Bryan, but that Old Bryan would want a fight. Ali wants a fight! Bryan paces while fans chant “Fight! Fight!” Bryan asks Ali what kind of car he drives. What does that have to do with this? But, it’s an SUV.

Bryan doesn’t like that. Ali is small, why does he need a car so big? Well, he has a wife and kids- Bryan slaps him! Bryan says Ali is ignorant, and slaps him again. So Ali fights back! Bryan whips but Ali reverses and headscissors Bryan tot he apron! Then dropkicks Bryan out, and leaps with a senton! Ali looks to shut this New Bryan up, next!

 

Daniel Bryan VS Mustafa Ali!

SmackDown returns as Bryan whips Ali and knocks him down with a kitchen sink knee. Bryan drags Ali up for a headbutt then toys with him. Fans boo as Bryan taunts Ali then bumps him off buckles. Bryan kicks away on Ali in the corner, then soaks up the heat. Bryan drags Ali up with an arm wrench, then whips him corner to corner. Ali goes up but Bryan catches him with a kick. Bryan kicks Ali while he’s down, then drops knees. Bryan hooks Ali’s face but lets up at 4. Ali gets to a corner but Bryan rocks him with a European Uppercut. Bryan grabs Ali for a toehold, then drops an elbow on the knee. Bryan hooks the legs and grabs at the arms. Ali resists so Bryan hooks the nose instead!

Bryan lets up at 4, then hooks the nose again. He lets go at 4, and then lets off the legs to stomp Ali on the back! Fans boo but Bryan soaks up the heat. Bryan stalks Ali and gives him the Yes Kicks. OR perhaps now, the “No Kicks” because fans say “No!” with each one. Bryan aims but Ali dodges to kick back! Ali SUPERKICKS Bryan in the back, covers, TWO! Bryan bails out but Ali builds speed to wreck him with a dropkick! Ali slingshots but Bryan dodges to send Ali into the post! Bryan grins while we go picture in picture.

Ali is down while Bryan catches his breath. Bryan climbs up top to make sure everyone can see him. Then he goes back for Ali on the outside, but leaves him for dead. Bryan soaks up the heat and counts along, but Ali gets in at 9! Bryan looks annoyed by the resilient Ali. He kicks Ali while he’s down, then drags him up. Bryan snap suplexes Ali down, then heads up top. Ali gets up and stops Bryan! Ali climbs up to join Bryan, and hits a SUPER SPANISH FLY!! But Ali flounders away, he crawls back to a cover, TWO!! Ali was so close to pinning THE WWE Champion! He hurries to put Bryan in a drop zone and goes back up. But Bryan trips Ali off and Ali hits the floor!

Bryan gets Ali back into the ring fast, and wraps on the No Lock! Ali moves around, enduring the hold. Bryan wrenches back hard, but Ali doesn’t give up. Ali drags himself and Bryan towards ropes as we return to single picture. Ali reaches, and gets the ropebreak! Bryan lets go, but is simply annoyed further. Bryan drags Ali up and puts him on the top rope backwards. He pulls Ali down into the Tree of Woe and gives more No Kicks. Bryan runs corner to corner, and hits a dropkick! Bryan drags Ali out of the Tree, then puts him back up. He climbs up behind Ali, but Ali slips out of the Super Back Suplex! Ali dodges Bryan and Bryan hits buckles! Ali CHOPS Bryan, and again, and again! Bryan kicks back and bump Ali off buckles.

Bryan whips but Ali reverses. Ali gets under Bryan to hit the tornado DDT! Cover, TWO! Ali again comes close and is shocked. Bryan ends up in a drop zone and Ali hurries up again. Ali leaps, 0-5-4 FLOPS! Bryan drags Ali over and slams his leg into the post! And again! And again! Ali crawls away but Bryan comes around from the corner to chop block the leg! Bryan drags Ali into the Heel Hook! Ali taps, Bryan wins!

Winner: The New Daniel Bryan, by submission

The WWE Champion’s new mean streak helps him snuff out the Beacon of Light tonight in Vegas! However, The Phenomenal One is coming for payback, will he become the new champion?

But Bryan isn’t done with Ali! He attacks Ali on the stage with those savage stomps! And he puts the Heel Hook on again! Ali taps but it doesn’t matter. More referees appear and Bryan lets Ali go. Fans boo but Bryan revels in it as he holds up his title. This mean streak runs deep, will it be the key to keeping the New Bryan the current champion?

 

Awww Vegas~! It’s time for a Rap Battle!

The New Day come out to host a special battle of bars between The Usos and The Bar!

SmackDown returns as Kofi Kingston, Xavier Woods and Big E stand ready as judges for this second ever SmackDown Rap Battle. Meanwhile, The Bar look like they stepped out from the 90’s. Now they’ll all be battling in the SmackDown Tag Team Championship Triple Threat. The Bar requested this battle but the New Day won’t allow for any funny business. Sheamus starts off, “This has gone too far, Big Tony, hit them with the bar.” Cesaro starts a beat for “Ice Ice Shamy.” The Bar basically parody Vanilla Ice. Fans don’t know whether to laugh or boo. The New Day rank that… a trash can out of 10.

As for the Usos, Jimmy and Jey take a moment to collect themselves. “It’s the Usos VS the Bar in a rap off, I’m like it can’t be. What the hell are they about to talk about, UCe?” “Sheamus’ hair grease. Cesaro’s mouth piece.” The Usos got cheated, defeated, they removed it from their memories like Woken Hardy: DELETED. They beat the Ninja Turtles, and now it’s on to Bebop and Rock Steady. “FELLA~!” Mr. Movie Star, they’re not stealing a line but that was booty. Usos show love, like cupid. Sheamus looks dumb. No, like stupid! Is Sheamus purposefully staying white like chalk? Does he have Cesaro help him with the mohawk? Brogue Kicks VS Superkick, ain’t no pump action, those come from the hip, hit you in the teeth. But how do you knock Cesaro’s teeth out with no knuckles? I dunno. Let’s introduce our friend, Mr. Turnbuckle.

Hello, Mr. Turnbuckle! How did it feel? Well when he pushed Cesaro’s teeth down his throat, we learned who’s the real man of steel. Cesaro the Swiss Superman, right? King of Swing, right? But that won’t matter against their Uso kryptonite! The Bar sets the bar? No this is a true tag team, they’re the stars. Ten years, still going hard, zero injuries, Uso Iron Man! Tony Stark!! The Usos are bulletproof, are the truth and still have fun. Back to back tag team of the year, six time champs coming soon. The Bar, New Day, Usos, Sunday, Welcome to the Uso Penitentiary! The Bar have heard enough, they start swinging! The Usos are ready, and they hit back! Cesaro and Sheamus get sent out, and then the Usos are ready to throw with The New Day.

But The Bar comes back to blow it all up! BROGUE for Jey, and then a beating for the hosts! Jey gets up, but gets A-Swiss-ted White Noise! The Bar hold up their titles, and as the Usos said themselves, “We ARE the Bar!” Will #RunBAR continue to run the SmackDown Tag Team Division after TLC’s Triple Threat?

 

Asuka speaks.

“I thought nobody would be ready for Asuka. I was wrong, I was not ready, I made one mistake.” The mistake was Asuka let up. But this Sunday, Asuka will kick, strike, climb and grab that title to win. As for tonight, Charlotte won’t be ready this time! The Empress is fired up, will she settle the score from back at Wrestlemania?

 

The Miz is in the ring!

He holds the World Cup trophy, and tells Shane McMahon that while it’s his week to have custody, Miz needs to speak his mind. Miz wants Shane to come out, and doesn’t want to have to beg. Fans want to see him beg. Miz concedes, and kneels. He bends the knee, and asks Shane come out to talk. This is bigger than a trophy, so please come out. Shane O’Mac appears! He joins Miz in the ring, and says “What’s up, Las Vegas?” And what is up with Miz? Is he okay? Why is Miz out here with the trophy? It’s the only way Miz can get through to him! Shane won’t respond to him. They can be so good together, if he’d just give Miz a chance.

Miz knows Shane is scared, and so is Miz. But Shane owes Miz one. They should tag together again. If they lose, fine, this can stop. But if they win, they can be the #BestTeamintheWorld! Shane thinks this is getting weird. No, the trophy is just a symbol. They can be so much more! Then enlighten him. Okay, fine. Miz will say this for the first time in his life. In fact, Miz will show him! Get a referee out here! A referee appears. They’ll take on Chip & Chad, The Vegas Boys! Chip & Chad appear, and the match is set?

The Miz & Shane McMahon VS Chip & Chad!

Shane is very confused, and tries to reason with Miz while the bell rings. Chip and Chad attack Shane! Miz is shocked, but he coaches Shane up. Shane fires off fast hands! He knocks Chip(?) down then throws him out! Shane dares Chad(?) to fight, and he lights him up with jabs! Shane whips then hits a big back elbow. He hits Chip away and then gives Chad a float-over DDT! Fans want Miz to get in, but he’s busy holding the world cup. Shane brings Chad into a triangle hold! Miz is already celebrating before Chad taps out. Shane & Miz win!

Winners: The Miz & Shane McMahon, Shane by submission

The Best Team in the World finally succeeds! But Miz is clearly more pumped then Shane is about it. Will Shane come around and join Miz on this tag team journey to the top? Or is Miz just seeing what he wants to see?

 

Paige is furious with the referee.

They can’t just be making matches without the GM’s consent! Especially with the commissioner. But The Miz said she gave permission. Paige sees what’s going on now. But just as she tells the ref to hush, Chip & Chad come in, with invoices. The Miz said they were getting paid $5000 each for that match. Paige tears up the invoices, and tells everyone to leave. Will the GM have words for the overly ambitious A-Lister?

 

Randy Orton heads to the ring!

The Viper prepares for a Chairs Match with the King of Lucha Libre! These two will be able to do whatever they want with those infamous steel weapons. Orton brings one into the ring with him, and says “Nothing like a good ol’ fashioned solid steel chair, am I right?” They’re built for comfort, but can also make a statement. Orton rolls footage of how he’s used these chairs to brutalize Rey Mysterio these last few weeks, namely wrapped around Mysterio’s head before being thrown into a steel post. Orton likes that, but perhaps we can do better. He rolls more footage, as he did very much the same thing, but throwing Mysterio into steel steps this time.

“Now let me get this straight.” Mysterio knows he has a Chairs Match, and is okay with that? Everyone’s seen what Orton does to his opponent, yet Mysterio is okay with that? Mysterio must think he’ll get his revenge. But Mysterio is a victim, and victims don’t get revenge. The locker room will be worried about TLC, but Mysterio needs to be worried about RKO. But Mysterio SMACKS Orton from behind! Mysterio jabs the chair into Orton, then SMACKS him again! Then he tosses the chair at Orton, to dropkick it in his head! Orton is on the ropes, and Mysterio hits the 619! Orton bails out, but Mysterio wants more! Will the Viper be a victim after Sunday?

 

Backstage interview with Becky Lynch.

If Charlotte Flair and Asuka beat each other up badly enough, does that give her an advantage in the SmackDown Women’s Championship TLC? Advantage? Becky’s getting back in the ring, road testing both her banged up face and her banged up brain, in one of the most dangerous matches in all of WWE. And not just against one but two of the best. So no, there is no advantage. But Becky still loves it. Fighting against the odds is what Becky does. And doctors can get all twitchy, but she’ll still scout her opponents tonight. And then on Sunday, she’ll remind all of us how much chaos can happen when The Man comes around.

 

Samoa Joe & Shinsuke Nakamura VS Jeff Hardy & Rusev w/ Lana!

The Destroyer wants to remind the Enigma of his troubled past, while the King of Strong Style wants to make it clear the Super Athlete will never relive his glory days. Will Hardy and Rusev uniting be enough to show Joe and Nakamura that it’s not about the past but the future?

Nakamura and Joe troll their opponents, but then the FABULOUS Truth appears? Dance Break~! The music hits and the flossing begins! “Proceed.” Nakamura kicks Hardy and the match begins! Nakamura drives in knees, then stomps Hardy down. He tags in Joe and Joe drives down elbows. Hardy hits back and Joe bails out. Joe drags Hardy out to join him and then throws Hardy into barriers. The Destroyer looms over the Enigma as we go picture in picture.

Joe puts Hardy back in the ring and stands hardy up. He tags to Nakamura and Nakamura stomps away in the corner. Nakamura gives Hardy Bad Vibrations, then taunts Rusev. He says “C’MON!” and Rusev takes the bait, but the ref keeps him back. Nakamura goes back to Hardy for a snapmare and knee drop! Cover, TWO! Joe tags in but Hardy flounders for Rusev. Joe drags him back and stomps Hardy out, before driving elbow after elbow into Hardy’s shoulder. He wrenches Hardy’s neck and Hardy endures as fans rally. Hardy stands up and fights back, but runs into Joe’s back elbow. Joe covers, TWO! Joe stands Hardy up for jabs as we return to single picture.

The referee counts and Joe backs off. Hardy fires off but Joe reverses the whip to hit the back elbow to Pele! Hardy goes down, Joe covers, but Rusev breaks it. Joe keeps on Hardy with another snapmare, and chops to the shoulder. He tags in Nakamura and Nakamura stomps on Hardy. Nakamura brings Hardy up in a facelock, then rams his knee in. He puts Hardy on the top rope and hits the Top Shelf Knee! Cover, TWO! Nakamura keeps his eyes on Rusev as he tags Joe back in. Joe kicks Hardy while he’s down, then pulls on the arms for the half surfboard. Rusev and fans rally for Hardy, and Hardy gets up. Hardy kicks and punches Joe, but Joe denies the Twist. Joe runs into the corner but into an elbow. Whisper in the Wind hits! Both men are down but fans fire up!

Hardy and Joe crawl for their corners as fans chant “Rusev Day!” Hot tag to Nakamura, then to Rusev! The Bulgarian Brute rallies on the Rockstar, and throws haymakers! Rusev whips and clobbers him at the ropes. Rusev scoops Nakamura to ram in his knee, then throws him with the Fall Away Slam! Nakamura gets to a corner but Rusev runs in for the back shoulder, and then the spinning heel kick! Fans fire up with Rusev as he stomps the mat. Nakamura slowly stands, and he elbows Rusev away. Rusev still lifts but Nakamura slips out. Nakamura swings but misses, Rusev’s roundhouse connects! Cover, but Joe breaks it. Hardy gives Joe the Twist of Fate!

Hardy follows after, and leaps off the apron! He wipes Joe out, but Nakamura runs at Rusev. Drop toehold, into the Accolade. Nakamura escapes to use his strike fest, then aims from a corner. But he runs into a MACHKA KICK instead! Cover, Rusev & hardy win!

Winners: Jeff Hardy & Rusev, Rusev pinning

The Bulgarian Brute pins the United States Champion! Will Rusev use this to launch back into the title scene? Will Hardy be able to render Joe’s mind games OBSOLETE?

 

Shane McMahon confronts The Miz backstage.

What is going on with him and the trophy? Paying competitors to attack Shane? Tricking an official into calling a match no one sanctioned? Miz is crossing a line. Miz admits it! But he won’t apologize. Shane’s instincts kicked in and won, just like he did at the World Cup! That kill-or-be-killed McMahon instinct! Miz has main evented Wrestlemania, has a film franchise and a reality TV series, but he’s never been considered Best in the World. Not until Shane came along. Miz offers a handshake, but Shane denies it. Miz is left hanging, will he give up this pursuit? Or will he only be all the more motivated?

 

Backstage interview with AJ Styles.

“The New Daniel Bryan” took the WWE Championship through underhanded means, but is Styles ready to take the title back? Styles is biding his time, because no one else wants to beat Bryan up more than he does. He’s counting the days, hours and minutes to TLC. This “new” Bryan isn’t that new. It’s more like “the real” Bryan. But there’s only one Phenomenal One, and that’s AJ Styles. Styles is ready for revenge, but will he get satisfaction on Sunday?

 

Charlotte Flair VS Asuka!

The Queen and the Empress are both ready for TLC’s first ever Women’s TLC match, that is also a triple threat with the champion, Becky Lynch. However, tonight is about a rematch from their epic SmackDown Women’s Championship Wrestlemania match! Will Charlotte be able to repeat history? Or will she find she’s no longer ready for Asuka?

SmackDown returns with a backstage interview from Charlotte. She’s days away from another historic first, but what about this amazing rematch? Charlotte knows what’s at stake. Asuka says she’s going to break Charlotte, but The Queen doesn’t break. The Queen breaks streaks. This will be a preview of how Charlotte will make them bow down to the Queen! The Queen makes her entrance, and we begin!

But wait, The Man promised to be ringside, and her she comes! Becky Lynch raises her belt all the way down the ramp and over to commentary where she takes her seat. The bell rings and Asuka and Charlotte turn their focus back on each other. Charlotte boots but misses, and Asuka puts on a waistlock. Asuka lifts but Charlotte fights out, only for Asuka to chop her back. Asuka runs, but her hip attack is caught! She still victory rolls through to a Kneebar! Charlotte scrambles around and stands up. She pries Asuka off and drives her down with a back suplex! Charlotte stands but Asuka follows. Charlotte CHOPS Asuka, and again. Asuka ducks the third to hit a German Suplex! Asuka fires up and runs, but Charlotte dodges the hip attack. Charlotte boots Asuka off the ropes, and takes a moment to catch her breath.

Fans echo the “WOO~!” as Charlotte brings herself over to a corner. Charlotte climbs up and moonsaults, but gets knees! And then flipped into the Asuka Lock! Charlotte scrambles more and gets up. Asuka holds on, but Charlotte makes it a backpack senton! Asuka grabs Charlotte again! Charlotte scrambles around but can’t get Asuka off. Charlotte roles to a ropebreak, and Asuka lets go at 4. This epic rematch continues after the break.

SmackDown returns once more, and the two are brawling on the mat! Charlotte and Asuka fire up with each hit and fans are dueling. Asuka hits, Charlotte hits, but Asuka gets an edge! Charlotte blocks, spins Asuka around, but Asuka switches to an octopus stretch! Charlotte endures as Asuka pulls back harder. Fans rally on both sides as Charlotte works against the hold. Charlotte pops Asuka up but Asuka makes it a crucifix driver! Cover, TWO! Fujiwara armbar outta nowhere! Charlotte struggles against it, but can’t get away. Becky seems unimpressed either way. Asuka wrenches back but Charlotte rolls through, only to end up in a triangle hold! Charlotte makes it a cover, ONE. She tries again, ONE! Charlotte rains rights then makes it a cover again, ONE.

Asuka fires palm strike while holding the hold. Charlotte deadlifts and powerbombs! Cover, TWO!! Charlotte almost had Asuka, but both women are down from exhaustion. Fans “WOO~” for Charlotte and cheer for Asuka as the two stir. Charlotte sits up first, and crawls over to Asuka. Asuka sits up and they both trash talk. Charlotte slaps Asuka as she says “You will never break me!” But Asuka gets the takedown, the jackknife, but Charlotte slips through to Figure Four! Asuka endures as Charlotte wrenches back. Asuka turns the hold over! The pressure reverses and now Charlotte endures! Charlotte scrambles to ropes and the two separate. Becky seems amused now. Asuka and Charlotte force themselves up, but Charlotte gets Asuka’s leg. Asuka endures the toehold, but Charlotte drives in elbows! Charlotte goes for another Figure Four but Asuka resists, so Charlotte drops a knee!

Fans duel as Asuka endures. Charlotte hammers away on Asuka, her frustration boiling over. Cover, TWO! Becky is again stoic as she watches Chalrotte drag Asuka over to a corner. Charlotte throws a leg into the post! She gives Becky a glare before she again throws Asuka’s leg against post. Charlotte then drags Asuka over, covers, TWO! She goes for the figure four, but Asuka cradles! TWO, and Charlotte CHOPS Asuka. And chops, and chops! Asuka blocks the next chop, and fireman’s carry takedown to kicks! Asuka runs, but Charlotte follows. Spear into a code breaker! Cover, TWO!! Asuka almost caught Charlotte there but this battle continues. Fans continue to duel as Asuka stands. Asuka kicks away on Charlotte, again and again and again, but then the buzzsaw is blocked. She still knocks the wind out of Charlotte, then fires off elbows from all sides!

Asuka kicks Charlotte in the face again and again, almost toying with her. She gives another shot then runs, but into a SPEAR!! Cover, TWO!? Asuka survives and Charlotte is surprised. Becky is stone faced, but on the edge of her seat. Charlotte flounders to her feet while Asuka stirs on the mat. Charlotte drags Asuka to a drop zone while fans duel. She climbs up top, moonsault! Asuka gets her feet up, but Charlotte saw it coming! Charlotte grabs the feet for a figure four, but Asuka sees that coming! Cradle to Asuka Lock!! Charlotte flairs but the hold is on deep! Asuka stays on Charlotte’s back, and they fall out of the ring! Charlotte resorts to a kendo stick! And she SMACKS Asuka!

Winner: Asuka, by disqualification

The Mad Queen returns as she swings wild! Charlotte gave Asuka the win, but The Man simply smirks as she looks at her battered competition. Becky goes to leave, but Charlotte SMACKS her in the back! Charlotte SMACKS away on Asuka, but Becky comes back with kicks! Becky throws Charlotte into the steps, then takes up the stick! She SMACKS Charlotte now! And again, and again! But Asuka attacks Becky! And throws her over the announce desk! Asuka picks up the stick for her own, and SMACKS Charlotte back! And Becky on the table, too! Asuka smacks everyone!! The Empress stands over The Queen and The Man, but will she stand tall as the Women’s Champion?!

 


 

My Thoughts:

SmackDown again has the superior main roster go-home! And oddly enough, that might be because they changed some things. Naomi and Mandy Rose were meant to spark a feud tonight, as started by social media, but perhaps there were factors beyond anyone’s control that cancelled that match. After all, this is a live show. But I do appreciate SmackDown at least wanted a midcard story going into TLC, it can’t always be about the title.

Moving on, Daniel Bryan’s opening promo was great. I knew he was going to pull that gag about “that’s an insult to [x]”. And it’s great for Mustafa Ali to be the one trying to get through to Bryan about his new behavior. For one, it’s just great that Cruiserweights are showing up on both main shows, and I hope this continues to some degree, in perhaps an effort to stop the isolation of the Division on 205 Live. Raw already has Lio Rush and the Lucha House Party, perhaps SmackDown can have stars like Ali, Noam Dar, or Cedric Alexander show up to give us some great matches. Bryan VS Ali was itself a great match and Ali looked strong even in losing.

I’m a little disappointed Bryan VS Styles won’t be a Chairs Match, but learning that Orton VS Mysterio gets that, that’s really great. Orton and Mysterio have been heading that way given the violent chair spots, and I am sure they’ll do the stipulation justice. But Mysterio standing tall tonight, I have a feeling that means Orton wins at TLC so his hunt for heroes can continue. The rap battle was great, from The Bar having a completely comedic routine to The Usos having a killer one. The Bar attack and manage to stand tall, but perhaps that, too, is a sign we get new champs at TLC. I feel that since The New Day already reached their five-time mark, The Usos will get another turn. And as great as these three teams are, I hope Usos becoming champs help shuffle challengers. SAnitY and The Club deserve second chances.

The Miz is definitely heading for a match with Shane, he just has to be. He goads Shane into a surprise match with jobbers, which actually helps cover up that Shane’s floatover DDT turned into a hungover DDT. I’m just wondering what he’ll have planned now that Shane seems firmly against #BestTeamintheWorld. Hardy & Rusev VS Joe & Nakamura was a really good match, and definitely builds things towards their respective blow-offs. However, it still feels too early to call who wins their respective feuds. It would be great if Rusev gets the US Championship back, he could use it after that detour with Aiden English. Hardy-Joe is also harder to decide, but Joe hasn’t won much lately so he could really use this one.

The SmackDown Women’s Championship scene is incredible right now. This Wrestlemania rematch tonight was amazing, and in the moment I was disappointed that it ended with a disqualification. But between the awesome brawl that happened between Charlotte, Asuka and Becky and how a disqualification keeps both women strong, I’m okay with it. The TLC Triple Threat is going to be off the charts, and it will definitely steal the show no matter where it is on the card. I’m hoping that if there is a new champion, it will be Asuka. The fans were so behind her, they have been behind her, and will be behind her even if she takes the title from Becky. The only other option fans will still be behind is if Becky retains, because otherwise Charlotte treads dangerous waters in her push.

My Score: 8.7/10

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Joe’s Lucha Libre Weekly: News & Analysis (12/9/10)

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What happened in CMLL, AAA, and the world of Lucha Libre this week? Joe Dinan has you covered!




CMLL

Last Friday Arena Mexico

So this was the Legends of Mexico show or Leyenda de Mexicana. The main event was a legends match which… wasn’t exactly good. It’s fun to see legends in the ring, and that’s why the fans were there but judging from a match point of view they couldn’t really move well. The match included Rayo de Jalisco, Atlantis, and Blue Panther vs Mascara Ano 2000, Canek, and Villano IV. In fairness Blue Panther can still move really well for his age. Rayo, Blue Panther, and Atlantis won the match. There was a 6 man tag titles match between Los Guerrero’s facing Sanson, Cuatrero, and Forastero. Los Guerrero’s retained their titles. Mano Negra, Solar, and Felino faced off against Fuerza Guerrera, Jerry Estrada who hasn’t been in Arena Mexico for 25 years, and Negro Navarro. That match was okay.

Arena Puebla Monday Show

The main event saw Rush and Terrible facing Volador and Diamante Azul. Volador and Azul won the match and at the end Terrible wanted to face Volador in a match. That’ll happen in the future I assume. Co Main event saw Atlantis, Soberano, and Valiente facing Felino, Bucanero, and Cavernario. It was a fun match with the latter winning.

Arena Mexico Tuesday Show

The main event of this show saw Sanson, Cuatrero, and Forastero facing Atlantis, Angel de Oro, and Niebla Roja. This was a fun match which saw the latter winning. I feel like they’re setting up an Atlantis match with Sanson out of this. Titan, Triton, and Esfinge faced off against Mephisto, Luciferno, and Ephesto. It was a really fun match with Mephisto, Luciferno, and Ephesto winning. Misterioso defeated Black Panther in a lightning match as well.

Arena Mexico Friday

The card this Friday sees the main event being Volador Jr facing Ultimo Guerrero in a singles match. It doesn’t appear that the heavyweight championship is on the line. Atlantis, Valiente, and Azul face Rush, Terrible, and Cavernario in the co main event. This really isn’t that big or important of a show based off the match card. I don’t expect the attendance to be over 10,000 this week.




AAA

AAA was live on Twitch on December 2nd. Every title was on the line but the story during the show was Brian Cage sent in a video message with Melissa Santos explaining in Spanish that he had a ton of injuries and couldn’t make it to the show. I think that was just to save face since Fenix also couldn’t wrestle because Cage just worked a match on Wednesday. Fenix comes out to cut a promo and explain things. The fans boo him because AAA stupidly kept promoting the match knowing for 9 days that Fenix wasn’t going to wrestle. He even mentioned it on their Lucha Capital show on Facebook the previous Wednesday. The false advertisement and use of card subject to change to trick the fans is bullshit. Subject to change means the card changes if an injury or last minute thing happens. It’s not a free pass to advertise matches you know you’re never going to do. Anyway on to the card.

Lady Shani won the title in the first match. Keyra was supposed to be in the match to make it a 5 way but she was at a WWE try out in Chile. So it was a four way and Scarlett Bordeaux left the match mid way through. So Shani won the match after Faby had a spat with the ref. The next match built on the angle of Mascara and Maximo. Mascara and his team win the match further continuing the feud. There’s talks of Maximo and Mascara being in a hair vs hair match.

Laredo Kid, Hijo Del Vikingo, and Angelikal who is now called Myzteziz Jr, as AAA La Parka pronounced him earlier in the show (Have fun typing Myzteziz.), faced Porde de Norte for the 6 man tag titles. The story going in here was the former team beat Porde de Norte 3 straight times so conventional thinking is they won’t win this match, but they actually did, crowning new champs. There was an impromptu match afterwards where Vikingo was taken out by the OGTs and La Parka replaced him. They still beat the OGTs, later we learned this match was because there was no Fenix vs Cage match.

Pagano and Joe Lider faced Ciclope and Miedo Extremo and Texano and Rey Escorpion for the tag titles in a hardcore match. It wasn’t as hardcore as the previous matches but it was still pretty hardcore. Texano and Rey retain their titles. Fantasma faced Drago to defend his Latin American championship. The story of the match was Fantasma was dominating and Drago just kept kicking out and Drago basically rolled him up for the win. As said before Cage and Fenix didn’t wrestle.

The main event was between Blue Demon Jr and Killer Kross facing Dr. Wagner Jr and Psycho Clown. Scarlett came out with Kross to distract. Vampiro came out to stop her but Kross kills him. Kross and Blue Demon ended up winning and Scarlett was hitting Wagner after the match. You know she’s going to get hers soon. Better not show anyone in the United States. They’ll complain to Roshfrans.

AAA on Twitch 12/8

There’s a show on the 8th which isn’t much of a star driven show. The main event features Dr. Wagner Jr, Psycho Clown, and Pagano facing Blue Demon Jr, Killer Kross, and Rey Escorpion. I’m sure Scarlett Bordeaux will be by ring side for that. The Co-Main event sees the OGTs facing Porde de Norte. That’s Averno, Chessman, and Super Fly vs Mocho Cota Jr, Carta Brava Jr, and Tito Santana. Aerostar will face Monster Clown in a special singles match. Laredo Kid, Hijo Del Vikingo and a luchador surprise who might just be Myzteziz Jr will face Taurus, Australian Suicide, and Jack Evans.




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