After The Bludgeon Brothers used Champion’s Advantage to retain, The New Day get a rematch the SmackDown Tag Team Championships, with NO Disqualifications!
- Jeff Hardy VS Randy Orton; Orton wins, by disqualification.
- Naomi VS Peyton Royce w/ Billie Kay; Peyton wins.
- Andrade “Cien” Almas & Zelina Vega VS Rusev & Lana; Rusev & Lana win.
- SmackDown Tag Team Championships No Disqualifications Match: The Bludgeon Brothers VS The New Day; The New Day win and become the new Smackdown Tag Team Champions.
PLAY BY PLAY
The Miz & Maryse head to the ring!
The It Couple returns to SmackDown victorious over Daniel Bryan thanks to brass knuckles Maryse gave to her A-Lister husband. Fans boo because we all know now what he did. Miz and Maryse are strangely somber while fans chant for Bryan. But Miz can’t help but laugh. “So, I was able to close my eyes and really feel that.” He really felt that in a way he never has before. Two nights ago, something happened. Maryse takes his hand and helps him through it. Miz has a family to think about now. It is with a heavy heart and the utmost sadness that Miz, choking back the “tears”, that Miz officially announces his retirement. Fans explode with “YES! YES!” “Of ever facing Daniel Bryan again!”
Yes, yes, yes, Miz closes the eight year saga because he did exactly what he said he would! Miz beat Bryan in front of the sold-out Barclays Center! Don’t get Miz wrong, Bryan gave it his all. Bryan punched and kicked him maybe 100 times, but 100 Bryan punches don’t amount to one Miz punch! Miz has the hardest punch in the WWE! He did what Bryan said and punched him in the face. But when Miz did it, Miz pinned Bryan 1-2-3, in front of his lovely wife and mother of the century and their angel of a daughter. Now, Miz starts a new chapter in his life, where he’ll watch episode 5 of Miz & Mrs! But wait, here comes Daniel Bryan!
Bryan speaks on the stage, calling Miz a “coward!” And he ignores everything Miz says. Miz hides behind Maryse as he says he’s no coward, he’s a winner. But Brooklyn knows better. “You’re a Coward!” Miz knows Bryan will have to live with the face he’ll never be better than Miz and will never get another chance to prove it! Bryan tells Miz to shut up. Miz can parody a retirement and cheat to win, but it’s just another layer in the huge facade that is “The Miz”. The lights, the make-up, all of it. Bryan promised to punch Miz, now he promises to expose The Miz. “And that is the wannabe Hollywood star cosplaying as a professional wrestler.” No one is retiring yet. But Maryse says Bryan might as well retire and become Daniel Bella. Speaking of…
Here comes Brie Bella! And she hits Miz! Bryan takes out Miz, too, and the A-Listers regroup on the outside. The fans are loving Bryan & Bella, because Brie has a pretty good punch, too. But as Bryan was saying, he talked to GM Paige. And at Hell in a Cell, Miz and Bryan are in a match, but not alone. It will be a Mixed Tag, Miz & Maryse VS Bryan & Brie! The A-Listers are furious but the WWE Universe loves it! Which super couple wins when we get this Awesome Mixed Tag Match?
Miz & Maryse go in search of Paige.
This is not how stars are treated! But she has nothing to say about Brie & Bryan? Miz & Maryse are the stars of USA Network and the highest rated reality show. Paige is a worse boss than Bryan! Well, Brie still punched him in the face. The match stays, and that will be AWESOME! Talk to the hand.
Jeff Hardy VS Randy Orton!
The Charismatic Enigma refuses to be erased by The Viper, and now stands up to render the third-generation superstar OBSOLETE! Will Hardy succeed in redeeming himself? Or will Orton strike him down once and for all?
The bell rings and we begin. Orton powers Hardy to a corner, then throws hands. He stops at 4, but Hardy hits back! Hardy backs Orton down, then kicks away on Orton. He whips but Orton reverses. Orton runs into a boot, but then trips up Whisper in the Wind! Hardy crashes and burns while we go picture in picture. Orton goes out to fetch Hardy, dragging him up to throw him back into steel steps. And again! Orton brings Hardy up and in, then covers. TWO, but Orton keeps his cold-blooded cool. He drags Hardy up and out now, to then bring him to the announce desk. Orton drops Hardy with a back suplex on the desk! Then he drags Hardy around, for another!
Hardy is down while Orton goes back into the ring. Orton shows off by doing jumping jacks, but then goes back out to fetch Hardy again. Orton brings Hardy up, for a third back suplex on the table! He leaves Hardy down and out while refreshing the count. Orton drags Hardy up a fourth time, but puts him in the ring. Cover, TWO! Orton pulls Hardy’s arm to stomp on it! Orton picks Hardy apart with those signature sinister stomps. Cover, TWO, but Orton keeps on Hardy with a chinlock. Hardy endures the squeeze and works his way up. Orton puts more of his weight on Hardy to bring him back down and we go single picture.
Fans rally up and Hardy fights out with elbows. Orton headbutts then whips Hardy corner to corner. Hardy hits back, then boots back. Hardy climbs up again, Whisper in the Wind works this time! Both men are down but fans rally for “Brother Nero!” Hardy hits Orton back with haymakers, then whips. Orton reverses but Hardy runs him over. Hardy atomic drops then takes Orton down for the leg-splitting leg drop. Dropkick added, then Twist of Fate! Orton falls into a drop zone, and Hardy takes of the shirt. Hardy climbs high, but Orton trips him up. Orton grabs Hardy’s hair to pull him back up. Orton goes after the gauge hole again! The referee reprimands Orton but Orton won’t let up. He then drags Hardy out for the DDT, but Hardy stops that. Hardy has Orton down again, and stomps him in the dick!
Winner: Randy Orton, by disqualification
Hardy doesn’t care, he dropkicks Orton out! And then he leaps on him at the announce desk! “DELETE! DELETE!” echoes out as Hardy tosses Orton over the desk and into barriers! Hardy isn’t done yet, but neither is Orton. They brawl, and Orton rocks Hardy with European Uppercuts. But Hardy comes back with big haymakers, and he bounces Orton off a post. Then he throws Orton into the crowd! The brawl continues right in front of the WWE Universe, and the production area. Hardy even splashes down on Orton. Hardy clears a table, clubs Orton hard on the back, and even SMACKS him with a chair!
The assault continues with more chair shots, and Orton ends up on the spare table. Hardy makes sure he stays there as he rains down rights and lefts. He even assaults Orton with a handheld camera! Hardy gets a wicked idea, and he climbs up to the second level. Fans are freaking out as Hardy takes aim… SWANTON BOMB!! Hardy and Orton crash down through the table! Hardy sits up, and laughs! Will he have the last laugh in this war with the Viper?
Backstage interview with The Bar.
Cesaro & Sheamus wish to address tonight’s SmackDown Tag Team Championship match. Is it a prediction? No, they’re here to issue a challenge. The winners face them next, but in come The Club! Karl Anderson & Luke Gallows want to be both champions and the Kickoff Panel! Will New Day be hit with mallets? Or will they use pancakes to assault pallets? Abs Anderson and Big Gallows issue a challenge to the champs! And if The Bar takes issue with that, then they can meet the Good Brothers in the ring. Back to Karen in the studio! The Bar accepts the challenge, because they don’t just set the bar, they ARE the bar! Who will prove themselves worthy of being #1 contenders to the tag titles?
Naomi VS Peyton Royce w/ Billie Kay!
It’s #GlowTime in Brooklyn, but Naomi is going up against one half of the Iconic Duo. Will Naomi be able to avoid the numbers game? Or is the future truly IIconic?
Billie & Peyton play a guessing game on the way to the ring. Name something overrated, loud, obnoxious and has annoying flashing lights. Peyton knows! It’s Brooklyn! Fans boo but Billie says that’s the answer to “What’s a dumpster fire?” Billie was thinking of something else, wink wink nudge nudge she’s in the ring. Oh, Naomi! Then it’s only fitting Peyton gets to beat Naomi, and prove that neither Naomi or New York is #IIconic. Words aside, Peyton gets ready while we go to break.
SmackDown returns and Peyton has Naomi in headscissors. Naomi pops right out, then blocks Peyton’s kick to spin her around. Naomi swings kicks but Peyton ducks, so Naomi kicks her forward. Then the running split splash! Cover, TWO! Billie and Peyton regroup, but Naomi runs to wreck Peyton with a dropkick. Naomi drags Peyton up and in, but Billie distracts. Peyton hotshots Naomi from behind, then heel kicks her down! Billie says that’s what Naomi gets! Fans boo and jeer but Peyton and Billie taunt Naomi. Naomi gets up at the count of 5, then staggers up at 7. Peyton is on her right away with clubbing forearms and stomps. Cover, TWO, and the IIconics are furious.
Peyton bumps Naomi off buckles, then brings her up to grind her boot into Naomi’s chin. Peyton backs off at 4, then drags Naomi out. She clubs away more, then drives a knee into Naomi’s back. Peyton pulls and thrashes Naomi around in a chinlock. Fans rally and Naomi powers up. Naomi arm-drags Peyton off, then ducks int eh corner. She kicks Peyton’s leg, then tees off with more kicks! Peyton staggers but Naomi rallies. Springboard kick! Cover, TWO! Naomi goes in a corner but Peyton puts her on the apron. Naomi gives her another kick, then takes Billie down with a bulldog to a post! Peyton puts Naomi into a post, then drags her in for a Perfect Plex! Cover, Peyton wins!
Winner: Peyton Royce, by pinfall
The Venus Flytrap wins thanks to her Femme Fatale BFF, and the two celebrate all the way to the back. Will this lead to an #IIconic title shot in the near future?
The New Day are patched up.
Big E’s ribs are questionable. He usually likes smoked with greens on the side. No, his ribs. Oh pretty bad actually. But it’s fine, Kofi Kingston knows they’re still in Brooklyn baby~! They started their record-breaking reign here! It’s the birthplace of Francesca 1.0. And it will be where they become the Five Time W! W! E, tag team champions~! High five! Big E, no, rib sauce. Oh, sorry. But yeah, it’s time! Will Kofi & Woods use their speed formation to overcome the brutality of Harper & Rowan?
Becky Lynch heads to the ring!
The SmackDown Women’s Championship was within her grasp as she had Carmella in the Disarm-Her. But then Charlotte Flair hit her with Natural Selection, and it was all torn away. Becky looked to put friendship over titles, but then she attacked Charlotte without remorse! “I deserve to be standing here as the Woman’s Champion.” And that means Charlotte deserved her beating. Summerslam wasn’t supposed to be about Brock Lesnar, Roman Reigns, Samoa Joe, AJ Styles, Seth Rollins, Ronda Rousey, and certainly not about Charlotte. No, it was meant to be about Becky! Becky was supposed to have her time! Becky earned her title, and was over Charlotte being added. “Because finally, it was my opportunity to silence the critics that said I was just Charlotte’s friend.”
Becky imagined herself raising that title, being her own woman, that she put SmackDown’s Women’s Division on the map as top woman! Fans act like they’re with her, but were they really? Fans say “YES! YES!” Becky doesn’t believe them. There was no #GiveBeckyaChance. There was no boycott. And when Charlotte stole that match, fans got up and cheered. Were the fans really that upset? And when anyone asks “Who is the greatest superstar of all time?” they don’t choose Becky. Becky has become an afterthought. No, Becky doesn’t care about this generation of “all talk and no actions.” She has had enough of opinions, and she decided to take action.
That referee counting three was someone counting her out of a trance. Becky saw so clearly in that moment, that her “best friend” was just holding her back. Charlotte stole Becky’s moment for the last time. Becky decided to raise Charlotte’s hand, only to rip her head off! This was Becky’s turn, not because anyone else says so, but because she says so! Becky’s the best, “and there’s not a woman on this roster or anyone in this arena or watching at home that can tell me different.” But speaking of, here comes Charlotte! Charlotte and Becky stare down and fight with words, but Charlotte rushes the ring and they fight with fists! Charlotte gets Becky down with hammer firsts, but Bekcy turns it around! The two stand back up and then tumble out of the ring!
Becky has Charlotte against the stairs, but then tries to retreat. Charlotte gives chase but referees come out as they get back in the ring. Becky boots Charlotte but the brawl only gets worse. Paige brings out reinforcements in the form of the SmackDown Women’s Division. Absolution hold Becky while Asuka and the IIconics grab Charlotte. Fans want to “Let Them Fight!” and they get loose! The other women pull them apart again, but Becky gets Charlotte down! The roster tries a third time to keep the peace, but Brooklyn is on Becky’s side in this fight. Charlotte SPEARS Becky out of the ring! Charlotte even shoves her other friends away to JUMP onto Becky! Becky and Charlotte have to be dragged apart to stop the fighting, while we go to break.
Andrade “Cien” Almas & Zelina Vega VS Rusev & Lana!
It’s a rematch from the Summerslam Kickoff as El Idolo & La Muneca are “amused” to beat Mr. & Mrs. Machka again. Rusev & Lana have lost every single time but now it’s time to show the WWE Universe it’s #AllAboutAlmas. Will Almas & Vega continue their sweep? Or will it finally be time for the Bulgarian Brute & Ravishing Russian to CRUSH!?
The bell rings and we start with the men just like Summerslam. Almas shoves then chops Rusev, but Rusev clobbers Almas. Rusev drops elbows, then stomps. Almas gives a jawbreaker, then kicks and elbows away in a corner. Almas backs off at 4, then goes back for more. He whips Rusev but Rusev reverses. Rusev runs into an elbow, then Almas goes for the inverted tornado. Rusev denies it, but ends up in the draping armbar! Almas lets go at 4, then springboards but into a roundhouse! Rusev tags Lana, and now Vega has to come in. Lana uses Almas as a step stool to then clobber Vega! Vega rolls out, but Lana roars “CRUSH!” Rusev joins in and the fans sing for Rusev Day while we go picture in picture.
Lana dares Vega to get back in, but Vega wants her to stay back. Vega goes in and circles with Lana, but Lana puts her in a corner for shoulders to the stomach. Vega denies the whip and hits a roaring elbow, then whips Lana in. Lana counters with a headscissor ax kick! Lana then gives Vega a ravishing bulldog! Cover, TWO! Vega scrambles away but Lana pursues. They’re on the apron, but Vega sweeps the legs! Vega throws Lana down, then pulls her back in a chinlock before stomping her down. Vega brags as she puts Lana back in. Cover, TWO, so she wraps Lana in a chinlock. Lana endures and works to get up. She stands, but Vega hops on as a backpack. We go single picture as Lana backs Vega into buckles. Lana gets free, but Vega gives her a jump kick!
Vega has Lana on the ropes, then hits a swing around into a draping chinlock! She lets go at 4, then gives Lana a facebuster. Cover, TWO! Vega grows frustrated, but she keeps on Lana with clubbing forearms. She runs, and gets Lana in a crucifix. Lana stays standing as she reaches for Rusev, but Vega shifts to a sunset flip. Lana sits on it, TWO to the Sunset. ONE, and Vega throws Lana down by her hair. Vega soaks in the heat as she runs in at Lana. Lana boots Vega then SLAPS Almas! Lana crawls for her corner but Vega clamps on. Vega drags Lana back but is pushed away. Hot tag to Rusev!
Rusev rallies on Almas! He gives a big shoulder tackle then a flying spin kick! Fans fire up with “Rusev Day! Rusev Day” as Rusev runs. His kick misses, but Almas’ boot feint to elbow hits! Rusev is down, Almas runs for CIEN KNEES! Cover, TWO!? Almas can’t believe that Rusev survives! He drags Rusev back up, hammerlock, but Rusev pops out. Rusev back suplexes but Almas slips out, only for Rusev to clothesline him out. Vega comes in and gets in Rusev’s face, but it’s Lana who SPEARS Vega down! Almas has a chair, but Aiden English snags it away! Rusev then MACHKA kicks! Time to CRUSH! Accolade!! Almas taps, Rusev & Lana win!
Winners: Rusev & Lana, Rusev by submission
They finally get one over El Idolo and his manager! And it was thanks to English. English always has his friends’ backs, will this help get the entire Rusev Day team back on track?
Shinsuke Nakamura speaks.
The King of Strong Style knows that the Statue of Liberty is about “give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses”, and Nakamura believes he’s a hero to America! Or rather, the United States of Nakamerica. Who will step up to the United States Champion in the coming weeks?
Renee Young interviews AJ Styles on the stage.
The Phenomenal One is still WWE Champion, but only after Samoa Joe pushed him so far, he snapped. Styles beat Joe down with fists and chairs, but that wasn’t how either man wanted to end the match. What happened at Summerslam? Styles has a hard time getting the words out, but he finally says, “Summerslam didn’t end the way I wanted it to. But I don’t regret what I did to Samoa Joe.” Styles lost and he’s not proud of how he acted. But Joe crossed a line that real men don’t cross. Styles broke his promise, but makes a new promise to the WWE Universe that he vows to not break. “The next time Samoa Joe mentions my family, I’m gonna rip his heart out.” But here comes Joe from behind! COQUINA CLUTCH!
Joe chokes Styles out on the ground, then lets him go so he can speak. Joe makes the camera stay on him as he says “Oh~ Wendyyyy~!” There are a lot of promises being made. Styles promised to come home and tuck in the kids, but “daddy’s already gone night-night!” Joe doesn’t care what’s honorable, he only cares about what’s effective. Will he get another go at the title? Will he take that title for his own?
Paige quickly prepares for the worst.
Not only does she want medics on standby for the upcoming main event, but she makes sure they get Styles taken care of right away. Then she is visited by Carmella. It’s about time Paige earns her paycheck. Hey did Carmella do something different? Her hair? Her shoes? No, it’s her weight. She lost ten pounds of gold on Sunday. Don’t #Titleshame, Paige! Everyone knows Carmella is getting a rematch, and it better be 1v1. Not if R-Truth has anything to say about it! What? Carmella has been ducking him for weeks now. The running stops, and he’s getting his title match. Tell her, Paige. No, Truth, that was for the Women’s Division specifically. Please move aside. “You got lucky this time.”
Paige and Carmella go back to talking rematch. It will happen next week. Yes, that’s what the Princess wanted to hear. She moonwalks out of frame, but apparently Truth is still in her way. Truth, stop, put Carmella down! But she’s what’s up.
SmackDown Tag Team Championships No Disqualifications Match: The Bludgeon Brothers VS The New Day!
Xavier Woods & Big E stood against doom and gloom Sunday night, but it went to a point where the powerhouse of positivity would damage his ribs. Now New Day shifts to speed formation as Kofi Kingston joins the fight. Will that and the No DQ format be enough to finally stop the duo of devastation that is Harper & Rowan?
The bell rings and it fires off! This is tornado style even because there’s no disqualifications over illegal participation. Harper goes after Kofi while Rowan has Woods. Kofi hits back and chops back but Harper uppercuts. Harper suplexes Kofi but Kofi lands on his feet. Kofi kicks Harper, then Woods dropkicks Harper over the desk! The New Day have control, but Rowan changes that as he tosses Woods. Kofi hops on Rowan, but gets thrown off. Harper throws the arm chair at Kofi! It’s a demolition derby while we go to break!
SmackDown returns as Rowan has Kofi in the corner. Harper keeps on Woods on the outside, and he grinds Woods’ head into the apron. Rowan brings Kofi up for a headbutt, but Woods kicks back on Harper! Woods chops and kicks but gets a palm strike. Harper brings Woods over but Woods slips out to then hit the roaring elbow! And a drop toehold to send Harper into the desk! Rowan whips but Kofi counters with the kicks. Kofi dumps Rowan out to then penalty kick him down! Fans fire up as Harper goes into the ring. Woods and Kofi search under the ring, and go for broke as they bring out a ladder! They put the ladder in the ring, but Rowan grabs them both. Harper DIVES! The Bludgeon Brothers take Kofi & Woods out at the same time!
Harper & Rowan search under the ring and bring out chairs. They put the chairs in the ring, then drag The New Day up and in. Rowan bounces Kofi off the desk while Harper whips Woods into steel steps. Harper stands on Woods, then clears out the announce team. Rowan puts Kofi on the apron for clubbing forearms, and Harper adds on. Rowan boots Kofi while Harper goes back to Woods for stomps. Harper drags Kofi out but fans rally up for New Day. Harper helps Rowan hit Kofi with a splash, then Rowan feeds Kofi to Harper’s boot! Things go back in the ring, cover, TWO! Kofi survives, but that just means he and Woods suffer more. But Woods enziguris Rowan back! But Rowan runs Woods over!
Harper aims at Kofi with a chair, but Kofi kicks it into his head. Then a tornado DDT onto the chair! Cover, but Rowan drags him out. Rowan boots Kofi down, then narrowly dodges Woods to run him over! Harper and Rowan regroup, then coordinate what more to do to The New Day. They go back out, and start peeling parts of the ring apart. They drag Woods over to the exposed LED edge, for the facebuster toss! Woods hits bare LED board, but that’s not all. Harper sets up a couple chairs, and then sets the ladder across them. He and Rowan drag Woods up, and everyone anticipates what’s coming. But here comes Kofi! He flies in, but he gets caught into the DOUBLE CRUCIFIX CHOKE SLAM! Cover, TWO!? Kofi survives?!
Fans are losing their minds but also cheering Kofi on for such superhuman toughness. The Bludgeon Brothers work on a new idea, and Rowan fetches a table! Harper sets it up but Woods grabs Rowan’s foot. Rowan kicks him away, but Kofi slumps out of the ring. Rowan goes to fetch Kofi, and Harper joins him. They drag Kofi back up for headbutts against a post! Now they grab the hammers! Harper slaps Rowan to fire him up, but then Rowan misses and goes into barriers! He blasts the timekeeper’s area apart! Harper SUPERKICKS Woods.
Harper checks on Rowan, but then has to hurry. He puts Woods in, but fans rally up. Harper drags Woods up near the table, but Kofi uses a Bludgeon hammer to stop him! Trouble in Paradise! Woods goes up while Kofi puts Harper on the table. Woods walks the tightrope, LIMIT BREAKER!! Cover, New Day wins!!
Winners: The New Day, Woods pinning; NEW SmackDown Tag Team Champions
They are the FIVE TIME W! W! E, Tag Team Champions~!! Big E returns to celebrate with Kofi & Woods! Positivity and perseverance overcome the bludgeoning, how long will they take this new tag title reign?
SmackDown really did give us a great “Special Edition”. Miz mocking Bryan with his fake retirement speech was Heel gold, but then it was actually pretty great to have Brie show up and get her shots in. This Mixed Tag is gonna be pretty fun, and could be a sign of Brie facing someone at Evolution the same as how Nikki is said to face Ronda. Hardy VS Orton was great, especially with the finish and post-match beating. Hardy gets back at Orton for the most part, but if the Hell in a Cell Match is reserved for bigger, they need at least a Falls Count Anywhere to settle this.
Naomi VS Peyton is a decent match, I think they need more familiarity. But Peyton getting the win is good for the IIconics should we get the Women’s Tag, and even just in the Women’s Division. Then while Becky did great with her motivation, it was clear there was the Vince influence that Becky had to be the Heel and get mad at fans. The fans aren’t going to hate Becky given they understand her frustrations, so it should’ve been a Face Tweener VS Face, and Charlotte could counter Becky’s complaints with the fact a Triple Threat is everyone for themselves. At the very least, Becky shouldn’t take the typical Heel route of blaming fans when we have nothing to do with it.
Great to see Rusev & Lana win thanks to English this time. That was a fun Mixed Tag but this feud doesn’t seem over quite yet. The Club VS The Bar next week is going to be really fun and they consider it a #1 Contender’s match, but I wouldn’t mind if both teams got a shot to really up the ante for Hell in a Cell. New Day win, as they should have at Summerslam, but it seems this was done because Rowan has bicep concerns. Rowan sadly always seems to be the Wyatt Family member getting hurt, hopefully this injury won’t be as bad as some in the past. New Day VS Bar VS Club will be an amazing possibility, but I’m just going to go with New Day VS The Bar for the usual Faces VS Heels.
My Score: 8.5/10