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Booking the Entirety of Smackdown 1000

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Smackdown Fist Stage WWE

The 1000th episode of Smackdown is this Tuesday and it’s been a highly anticipated show for weeks now. The reunion of all four members of Evolution is going to happen and Rey Mysterio vs Shinsuke Nakamura was just announced last week. There’s sure to be more returns and surprises so let’s see if I can make the most out of those within a two hour show. My goal here is to reminisce on the times and superstars we cherish while still making new stars.

John Cena’s Open Challenge

He doesn’t currently have a championship but John Cena made his WWE debut as a result of Kurt Angle’s open challenge. That’s why I would have John Cena open the show with an open challenge to all the current and former stars in the locker room. The man that answers the call is none other than Kurt Angle. When rumors of Kurt Angle returning to WWE started to surface a couple years ago I wanted him to answer John Cena’s United States Championship Open Challenge as his method of return. Since that is no longer possible, Tuesday feels like the best way to revisit that historic segment from 2002.

Evolution segment sets up giant main event

For the Evolution segment I’d have all four members go to ring and cut a promo. They would be interrupted by New Day, who would then be interrupted by The Club (Gallows, Anderson, and AJ Styles). All three teams are going back and forth on the mic when the lights go out. Sanity’s music hits and they decide they want in on the action. This now sets up the giant 12-man main event: Evolution (w/ Ric Flair) vs The Club vs New Day vs Sanity. Teddy Long can make the announcement of the tag team match because that’s what he does best.

Becky Strikes Again

As the segment concludes and is about to go to commercial, Becky Lynch attacks Ric Flair from behind. This is just the next way for Becky to get under Charlotte’s skin. Charlotte comes in to stop it but Paige needs to preserve their title match for Evolution. Paige announces that she’s recruited a former women’s champion to humble Becky. Beth Phoenix makes sense but Molly Holly is more synonymous with the Smackdown brand. We saw Molly return at the Royal Rumble so this isn’t out of the realm of possibility. Becky Lynch defeating a legend one on one would further cement her current status as champion.

Evolution (cont.)

During the main event my plan would be for Sanity to win. At Raw 25, the Revival got utterly humiliated by DX so here’s a chance to rectify that. If they’re not ready to give Sanity that kind of a clean win, Undertaker can cost Triple H and Evolution the match. They’re in the middle of a feud and there is no Smackdown celebration without an appearance from The Undertaker.

Eddie Guerrero Tribute

My original plan was for Andrade “Cien” Almas to pay tribute to Eddie but I eventually thought against it since he is his own person. Instead, after a commercial, a video montage should play of Eddie’s best Smackdown moments. WWE is usually really good with their video packages and Eddie is one of Smackdown’s most significant talents of all time. As the montage fades, Rey Mysterio’s music hits to signal his match with Nakamura. Since Rey was his close friend, it would be really special to see some sort of tribute to Eddie on his ring gear or maybe he wins the match via Frog Splash. Perhaps we see Vickie Guerrero play a role in this instead. She’s a former Smackdown General Manager so she deserves a spot in the show for multiple reasons.

Samoan Supremacy

I’m not sure if The Rock is scheduled to make an appearance but I need him for this segment. When looking back at the earliest memories of Smackdown, The Rock is all over them. I’d have him come down to the ring and talk about those memories and his legacy – saying it wouldn’t have been possible without his Samoan ancestors. That’s when Samoa Joe’s music would hit. He’d make the obvious remarks of The Rock’s Hollywood status and what not. Joe would then go on to say that the reason WWE brought him in was because they were tired of The Rock’s and Roman Reigns’ bloodline and needed a fresh start. After all, he has been one of main the faces of Smackdown for all of 2018. After another insult to The Rock’s family, a fight would ensue which would require both guys to get pulled apart. The Rock could even take a shot at Joe’s freshly injured knee before the scrap concludes.

A New Giant Emerges

One of the most iconic moments in Smackdown history is when Brock Lesnar’s superplex to Big Show collapsed the entire ring. Since Big Show returned last week, he could stand in the ring while the clip of that match plays on the Titantron. Big Show lost in his return last week so his promo would have a reflective and somber tone. He would have the audience believe that he’s about to retire. This would be the show to do it on, after all. However, before Show can conclude his speech, Lars Sullivan debuts. Sullivan declares that he won’t allow Show to walk out until he puts him down himself. Lars wins via superplex and a star is born.

Edge and Christian’s Cutting Edge Peep Show

I had a few big stars left over and this was the way to squeeze everyone in. Daniel Bryan is a guest on the Cutting Edge Peep Show. Edge and Christian are congratulating him on his recently earned WWE Championship match. Christian says him and Daniel Bryan are similar in the sense that they were once underdogs. Edge says he sympathizes with Daniel because he also had to retire early. Miz is annoyed and decides to crash the party. He cuts the promo of a lifetime of everyone in the ring and puts over Miz TV as the superior talk show.

A certain Rattlesnake in the back has heard enough. Glass shatters. Dads everywhere toss their children in the air out of excitement. Stone Cold Steve Austin is walkin’ and talkin’ all the way down to the ring. He is clearly fed up. Miz tries to talk over the entrance music and audience ovation to no avail. Austin gives a Smackdown-sized stunner to the Miz and the microphone goes flying. Austin, Bryan, Edge and Christian all celebrate in the ring as Miz lays lifeless. Miz tries to get up toward the end of the celebration but receives another stunner for his troubles. Everyone is happy heading into the main event.

Miscellaneous

The Fist

When lifelong wrestling fans think of Smackdown, they immediately think of the giant fist that used to be centered at the top of the stage. Tuesday is the ideal time to bring it back for one night.

Commentary Team

I’d like to hear some of the voices of Smackdown’s past. Michael Cole and Tazz on commentary with Tony Chimel as the special guest ring announcer would be quite the nostalgia trip.

Hardy Boyz vs The Usos

The Hardy Boys are clearly one of the most crucial elements to the early success of not only Smackdown, but the history of the tag division. In a down year for Smackdown, the Jimmy and Jey Uso were considered by many as the MVPs of the brand in 2017. To my knowledge, these pairs of brothers have never actually squared off in the ring. Let’s make it happen on Tuesday.

Missed Opportunity

As much as I loved King Booker’s return to introduce New Day into the 5-Timer’s Club, I wish there would have been a way to save Booker T for Tuesday night.

Opening Theme

I saw a poll going around Twitter asking for everyone’s favorite Smackdown opening theme of all time. This got me thinking that it would be a fun idea to open the show with a mash-up of all the past themes and short clips of all the past title sequences edited together. It’ll be a quick trip down memory lane to start the night.


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Top 5 World Championship Reigns In The WWE Modern Era (1984 to Present)

See the lists developed by PC Tunney, Greg DeMarco, and Patrick O’Dowd as they determine the five best world championship reigns in the modern era of WWE!

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Roman Reigns WWE Universal Champion

See the lists developed by PC Tunney, Greg DeMarco, and Patrick O’Dowd as they determine the five best world championship reigns in the modern era of WWE!

Wrestling is one of the most fun topics under which we can rank nearly everything. A simple Google search will reveal entire websites devoted to rankings–wrestling or otherwise.

PC Tunney devised an idea, and I developed a name. Thus, the Impromptu Wrestling Convo (aka, The IWC) was born. The first topic? Top 5 World Championship Reigns In The WWE Modern Era.

PC Tunney, Patrick O’Dowd, and myself each came up with our Top 5, and came together to reveal them on this special podcast (see it above, and below). Definitely give it a listen. But here you can also read our composite list, and see who ranked in our Top 5.

Grading Criteria:

  • Points were assigned for the rankings: 5 points for #1, 4 points for #2, and so on.
  • Ties would likely have been left as ties, but (luckily for me) there were no ties in the Top 5, making that part easy.
  • Any reign starting with Hulk Hogan’s first was eligible to be included.

And now, the list!

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Top 5 World Championship Reigns In The WWE Modern Era

5. Brock Lesnar, 2014

Starting with his dismantling of John Cena at SummerSlam (which was supposed to be Daniel Bryan), Brock Lesnar had a reign that included an incredible triple threat match with Seth Rollins and John Cena at the 2015 Royal Runble, and of course the WrestleMania 31 main event clash with Roman Reigns that ended in Seth Rollins’ iconic cash-in. This reign is mainly notable for how it starts and how it finishes, as there was but one bright spot in the middle.

4. John Cena, 2005

Not the longest John Cena world title reign, but Cena’s run as WWE Champion started at WrestleMania 21 and ended with the first ever Money In The Bank cash-in at New Year’s Revolution. This cemented Cena as the top dog in WWE, complete with a move to Raw in the draft, and the emergence of “Super Cena.”

3. CM Punk, 2011

454 Days that no one will ever forget, CM Punk dominated WWE television in a reign that was ultimately cut short by The Rock. Punk didn’t main event WrestleMania 28, facing Chris Jericho before the “Once In A Lifetime” clash between The Rock and John Cena. This ended at the following Royal Rumble at the hands of The Rock, who would go on to lose that title to Rumble winner John Cena at WrestleMania 29.

2. Roman Reigns, 2020

The present-day WWE Universal Champion nearly tops the list, but what remains to be seen is just how long he holds the title, and how it ends. Roman Reigns is on a monumental ride, with no signs of slowing down. We will see if the emergence of a new megastar ends this journey, or if Hollywood comes calling first. Either way, this will end up being acknowledged as one of the all time great championship reigns.

1. Hulk Hogan, 1984

Hulk Hogan began his 1,474 day reign as WWF Champion on January 23, 1984, defeating The Iron Sheik in Madison Square Garden. Hogan would kick off the Rock-N-Wrestling Era, launching WWE into a stratosphere not seen by any other wrestling company, ever. Outside of an 83 week stretch, no one could touch WWE, and that stretch was fronted by Hogan himself. His reign ended in controversy (something about Andre The Giant selling the championship to Ted Dibiase, evil twin referees, and a tournament at WrestleMania IV), but it still goes down as the greatest ever.

Others getting mentioned:

  • Jinder Mahal, 2016 (yes, that was mine)
  • Brock Lesnar, 2017 (by PC Tunney)
  • Randy Savage, 1988 (Patrick O’Dowd’s)
  • John Cena, 2006 (by Tunney)

To see how each talent was listed, and by who, I made this chart. Keep in mind, a “5” means they were #1 on that person’s list, a “4” is #2, “3” is #3, “2” is #4, and a “1” is #5.

What are your thoughts? Drop them in the comments below, or on social media! Also, give the podcast a listen, it’s streaming throughout this article.


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News From Cook’s Corner 1.17.22: Gory Self-Mutilation

AEW tried to catch lightning in a bottle for the second time. Did it work? What other news struck last week?

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Hi, hello & welcome to News From Cook’s Corner! We’ve got a short column for you this week, which most of you were probably expecting when the Cincinnati Bengals actually on a playoff game. Nah, I didn’t party too much, just had an allergic reaction with my eye again. We’ve done this before. This time I’m pretty sure it had something to do with cleaning my bookshelf and rearranging my books. Hadn’t done that in awhile, so there was a ton of duct. Sitting down and looking at a computer screen sucks, so we have to limit it as much as possible.

There’s still a couple things that warrant discussion though, so let’s get to it.

WWE On The Offensive

Looks like this week’s top stories are about WWE trying to do things to undermine wrestling promotions. We start with Major League Wrestling, who has filed a federal anti-trust lawsuit against WWE claiming that WWE has interfered with their ability to make various media rights deals.

Some of the highlights:

-Former WWE executive Susan Levison allegedly warned an executive from VICE that Vince McMahon was “pissed” they were airing MLW programming. MLW claims that WWE had leverage over VICE due to the Dark Side of the Ring series often being focused on WWE subject matter.

-MLW alleges that when WWE found out about their agreement with Tubi, WWE threatened to stop doing business with Fox. The fallout from the Tubi agreement falling through led to a drop in ticket sales & event cancellations & delays.

-As an example of WWE’s anticompetitive behavior, MLW cited AEW being held out of two arenas in the Cincinnati market due to pressure from WWE. Jon Moxley wrote in his book that the Heritage Bank Center on Cincy’s riverfront refused to book AEW due to WWE influence. I don’t know the other, could be the BB&T Arena across the river on the campus of Northern Kentucky University where WWE has held house shows. AEW wound up running the Fifth Third Arena on the campus of the University of Cincinnati, and outdrew the Raw taping held at the HBC just prior.

-Apparently starting in early 2020, WWE started trying to poach MLW wrestlers that were under contract, and aired footage of an MLW wrestler without MLW’s consent. (Somebody would have to fill me in on this one, I haven’t the slightest idea who this would be.) MLW also claims that WWE sought to prevent wrestlers from working with MLW by refusing to hire wrestlers that had worked there, and that one MLW wrestler demanded to be released early from his contract so he could join WWE.

Do I think that at least some of these allegations are true? Having followed pro wrestling for over thirty years and having read up on the history of WWE…you betcha!

I don’t think there’s a question that WWE has resorted to any means necessary to drive potential competitors out of their market. They’ve been doing this since taking most of the territories’ top stars back in the mid-1980s. It’s been a monopoly for nearly two decades for a reason. The main question I have: Will a judge actually care, or will they throw it out of court because it’s silly pro wrestling?

How do you think WWE slips under the radar on things that other media companies & sports leagues actually have to deal with? People have been trained to not take WWE seriously. As much as people like us obsess over the rasslin’ business, people that don’t “get it” are happy to ignore it. Vince McMahon can do any darn thing he wants, and the reaction from folks outside the wrestling bubble will be non-existent. It’s wrestling! To outsiders, the whole damn thing is an outlaw mudshow.

AEW = Gory Self-Mutilation

The Toronto Sun did an article on All Elite Wrestling over the weekend, talking about their status as a competitor to WWE. They asked WWE for comment & got one:

“If you look at the gory self-mutilation that bloodied several women in the December 31 event on TNT, it quickly becomes clear that these are very different businesses. We had an edgier product in the `Attitude’ era and in a 2022 world, we don’t believe that type of dangerous and brutal display is appealing to network partners, sponsors, venues, children, or the general public as a whole.”

A few notes here:

1. I’ve been doing this stuff longer than I care to admit, and I never thought of asking WWE for comment on something. Should I start asking people for comments on topics I’m writing about? I doubt I’d get any answers, but it might be worth a shot.

2. This has been WWE’s strategy when asked about AEW for some time now. We remember Vince McMahon using the phrase “Blood & Guts” to describe the promotion on a conference call. They know that people get squeamish about blood, especially when it comes to blood coming from women. The Fabulous Moolah never busted anybody open on television, and she trained most of the women for years. People aren’t used to seeing it, and they often get uncomfortable with things they aren’t used to seeing.

3. Most people find other people bleeding pretty gross. There’s a reason why deathmatch wrestling is a niche produxct. People that love it really, really love it, but it’s a very small percentage of the marketplace.

4. WWE’s belief is that advertisers & media companies aren’t big on blood, so they make sure to mention AEW’s apparent lust for the red stuff whenever the subject comes up. Their hope is that advertisers will shy away from advertising with AEW, and media companies won’t give AEW big money when their current deal with WarnerMedia is up.

5. Thus far, whenever Tony Khan is criticized on something, he doubles down on it. So there’s a pretty good chance that we’re going to see even more matches with female bleeding. AEW’s female workers seem happy to do it.

6. WWE could be called out as being hypocritical on this front, but there aren’t many people that will hold them accountable.

It’ll be interesting to see how this goes. All I know for sure is that the smack talk between these two promotions and their fans is just beginning. Think it’s tocic now? Wait a couple of years.

Welp, that’s all for this week. Thanks for reading! Join me later in the week for some Divisional Round picks. Until then, keep your stick on the ice.

In Memoriam: Pete was a longtime reader from back in the day. From my dealings with him he was a kind person that knew how to use his head. When you’ve written things on the Internet as long as I have, you learn that’s a rare thing. From what I’ve read from people that knew him in real life, he was the same way off the computer. Sadly he passed away from cancer on Friday night. Pete was always about serving others, as he was a U.S. Air Force veteran & a regular blood donor. He will be missed.


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