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Chairshot Classics: WCW Slamboree 1993 – A Legends’ Reunion

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In The Arena: Missy Hyatt is getting a word with The Assassin & Mad Dog Vachon. She’s never met them, but she has heard stories. Vachon says he became a wrestling legend for his friends in Canada and the fans around the world. If he was in the ring for the last match, he would have taught those guys a lesson. It’s no secret that The Assassin has had bad blood with Dusty Rhodes and he offers an open challenge, anytime, anywhere.

Match #4: Thunderbolt Patterson & Brad Armstrong vs. Ivan Koloff & Baron von Raschke
Patterson takes the mic with no partner in site. He says that ‘Bullet’ Bob Armstrong is unavailable to wrestle tonight, but he offers to wrestle both men by himself. Koloff says the Armstrongs have always been cowards, so here comes Brad to defend the family name. A brawl breaks out with all four men. Patterson puts Raschke in a front facelock across the middle rope while Armstrong pummels Koloff with rights. Armstrong lifts him with a back body drop and hits a drop kick before knocking Koloff to the entrance ramp. He comes over to clear out Raschke and he and Patterson own the ring. Raschke pulls a chair over the guard rail but they let it go.

Order seems to be restored and Patterson is ready to go. He backs Raschke into the corner and continues to psyche him out. Raschke tries a side headlock but Patterson dances his way out of it. Raschke is frustrated and he tags in Koloff. Collar and elbow, Patterson grabs the wrist and tags in Armstrong. Koloff reverses momentum and takes him down with a snapmare before dropping the leg. He rakes the back and tags in Raschke. Double elbows before Koloff heads for the apron. Raschke grabs a handful of hair and drives Armstrong into the turnbuckle. Clubbing forearms by Raschke and he sends Armstrong for the ride. He grabs his signature claw but Patterson makes the save.

Koloff is tagged in but he’s backed up because so was Patterson. Thunderbolt hits some rapid fists of fire and takes both opponents down. He and Armstrong whip their opponents together for a collision. Armstrong hits Koloff with some rights in the corner while Patterson sends Raschke for the ride. Patterson hits a shot to the throat and that’s all it took.
Winners: Thunderbolt Patterson & Brad Armstrong (Patterson/Throat Thrust)

  • EA’s TakeNot much of a match, just a way to put more veterans on the card to go along with the theme. The Armstrongs are definitely one of the more underrated wrestling families in history, so that was a nice moment.

In The Arena: Ric Flair is set to host another edition of A Flair For The Gold, stylin’ and profilin’ in his tux as he’s here to reunite The Four Horsemen. It comes with a lot of good news but a little bit of bad news. He first introduces his longtime best friend, ‘The Enforcer’ Arn Anderson. Barry Windham has been snubbing Flair as well as The Horsemen, but before long, Anderson will be the new NWA World Heavyweight Champion. The bad news is that Windham will not be a part of the Horsemen and Tully Blanchard will not be showing up, but Flair next introduces one of their mentors, Ole Anderson. He told him they cannot trust Windham. Next, it’s the special addition to the Horsemen, it’s ‘Pretty’ Paul Roma. These people don’t realize how many people Flair had to choose from, but he is going to help them achieve excellence. The Nature Boy calls out The Hollywood Blonds before continuing his party with the girls.

Match #5: Nick Bockwinkel w/Verne Gagne vs. Dory Funk Jr. w/Gene Kiniski
Johnny Valentine joins commentary for this AWA vs. NWA bout. They lock up and there’s a clean break. Another collar and elbow and Bockwinkel ducks out of the way. They lock up once more, and Bockwinkel is still avoiding contact. Funk goes for a single leg pick up but Bockwinkel moves. They tie up, Funk finally able to get some shots in. Collar and elbow, knee to the gut and an uppercut by Funk. He grabs a side headlock, maneuvers into a hammerlock, reversed by Bockwinkel and Funk is taken to the mat. Slowly to a vertical base and he manages a break in the corner. Funk with uppercuts and forearms before dragging Bockwinkel down to the mat.

Up to their feet, Bockwinkel with body shots but its Funk with a snapmare. Bockwinkel locks in a head scissor submission and Funk flips out of it. Funk checks in with Gagne. Collar and elbow, Bockwinkel grabs an armbar, Funk reverses with a scoop slam, but Bockwinkel gets his feet up and returns the favor. Funk rolls out to the floor. He comes back in, they lock up and Bockwinkel works on the left arm. Funk whips him and scores with a back elbow and takes him down with uppercuts. Reverse chin lock by Funk as the ref checks in. They exchange rights in the corner, Bockwinkel getting the better of it with heavy forearms. He tries a cover but Funk is in the ropes.

Collar and elbow, Funk with positioning, he grabs a front face lock and takes him down. They roll for pinning position on the mat and no one gets three. Double leg take down by Bockwinkel, he slowly tries rolling him into a Boston crab but Funk throws him off. Collar and elbow, Bockwinkel with the side headlock, belly to back suplex by Funk. Dory grabs an arm bar, he works him all the way to the mat. Funk works on the back, Bockwinkel trying to strength out but cannot escape. They chain wrestle and Bockwinkel reverses the double wrist lock. Funk breaks the hold, collar and elbow, Bockwinkel with the side headlock, Funk backs him into the corner and delivers shots.

Bockwinkel turns him around and lays in his own forearms. Snapmare and a cover, Bockwinkel gets two. Front face lock is applied on Funk. He works up to his feet, Bockwinkel hangs on with a side headlock. Funk breaks it with a knee and knocks Bockwinkel out with uppercuts. Forearms to Bockwinkel, and he brings him back in with a vertical suplex. Funk scores with a piledriver but Slick Nick gets his boot on the ropes. Bockwinkel reverses a double underhook and moves into a backslide. Funk is able to avoid the three count. Bockwinkel is sent to ropes, back elbow and a single leg pickup by Funk. He goes for the spinning toe hold, Bockwinkel reverses with an inside cradle and gets a two count.

Bockwinkel locks in the Figure Four. Kiniski tries to break it up and the referee has to get him out of there. There is a break on the ropes. They exchange shots, Bockwinkel with a scoop slam and a two count. Funk tries an inside cradle but Bockwinkel is too close to the ropes. Time runs out and we have a draw.
Winner: Time Limit Draw

  • EA’s Take: More nostalgia in this one. The pace was about what you would expect of a 52-year old Funk squaring off with Bockwinkel, who was nearing 60 and coming from a much more basic era of wrestling. These matches are fun purely to see some of the all-time greats, but aren’t going to give you much in terms of great entertainment.

Match #6: ‘The Natural’ Dustin Rhodes & Kensuke Sasaki vs. ‘Ravishing’ Rick Rude & WCW World Television Champion ‘Mr. Wonderful’ Paul Orndorff
Rude and Sasaki get us started. Rude talks some trash and looks his opponent over. He shoves Sasaki and poses. Kensuke does the same and then violently shoves Rude into the corner to a big pop. Rude avoids the tie up and takes control with clubbing forearms and a shot to the throat. Sasaki avoids a clothesline and grabs a strong wristlock. He lifts Rude up and down for more pressure. Orndorff is tagged in and he gets the same treatment. Rhodes is tagged in, he hangs onto the wrist and delivers some elbows as well.

Orndorff is taken to the mat with a hammerlock, Rhodes driving the knees into his back. Sasaki is tagged back in, he grabs the hammerlock, using his feet to fall back for leverage. Sasaki kicks a hole in Orndorff’s back and Rhodes is back in. Wristlock by The Natural, but Orndorff is able to back up and make the tag. Rude and Rhodes have a long staredown. They exchange quick rights, Rhodes takes control and he sends Rude for a high elevation back body drop. Irish whip but Rude gets his boot up. He measures Rhodes with a right, sends him to the corner but Rhodes gets the knee up. The Natural tries a crossbody, Rude ducks and Rhodes hits the floor.

Rhodes is driven into the apron and Orndorff takes liberties while the referee is distracted. Swinging neckbreaker by Rude and he gets two. Rude poses to a sea of boos. Orndorff is tagged back in and the partners power Rhodes back first into the corner. Mr Wonderful digs at Rhodes’ face and the ref backs him off. Rhodes is sent and eats a back elbow. Rhodes hits the turnbuckle and Rude’s back in. He drives his shoulder into the midsection of The Natural and sets up for a piledriver. Rhodes hangs on, Rude finds a different way to lift him up, Rhodes reverses with one of his own. He makes the cover and the US Champ kicks out.

Orndorff is tagged in and he drives Rhodes into the corner. Irish whip and they both go down on a shoulder tackle. Rude is tagged in but so is Sasaki, he hits a diving clothesline and an inverted atomic drop. He mocks Rude and hits three consecutive clotheslines.He tries a back drop, Rude kicks him, Sasaki ducks a clothesline and lifts him with a military press. Orndorff charges in so Rhodes responds. Rude and Orndorff have their heads knocked together and the ref restores order. Sasaki heads for the top rope but he’s knocked off by Orndorff. Rhodes tries dealing with him on the outside, but inside Sasaki takes a Rude Awakening and that’s enough for the win.
Winners: ‘Ravishing’ Rick Rude & ‘Mr. Wonderful’ Paul Orndorff (Rude/Rude Awakening)

  • EA’s TakeI love me some Rick Rude and Orndorff makes a good partner for him. Sadly, we’re now less than one year removed from the back injury that would effectively end his in ring career and he would leave the world permanently before the turn of the century. He had such a great mind for the business, it would have been nice to have his voice around in the years since. It’s nice to get away from the nostalgia business for a bit too after three straight matches of it.
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Chairshot Classics: WWF King Of The Ring 1994

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Despite all the controversy, WWE Crown Jewel is moving forward as planned on November 2nd and not only will the event feature the in-ring return of Shawn Michaels when D-Generation X meets The Brothers Of Destruction, but also the World Cup tournament. So today, we’re looking back at another past WWE tournament with the 1994 King Of The Ring! Following Bret Hart’s King Of The Ring win last year, his brother Owen looks to claim the throne for himself and step out on his own. However, the likes of Razor Ramon, Bam Bam Bigelow, Jeff Jarrett and The 1-2-3 Kid all have their sights set on the crown. Let’s jump into the action!

Open: Earlier in the day as the camera crews were setting up around the tournament bracket board, Jeff Jarrett showed up to do some premature advancing of his name. Owen Hart would walk in to correct him, followed by Bam Bam Bigelow and Irwin R. Schyster. Todd Pettengill then voices over highlights showcasing tonight’s card, including the first round tournament matches, our WWF Title match and Roddy Piper vs. Jerry Lawler.

In The Arena: Bill Dunn asks the crowd to please rise, as Ricky Medlocke of the band Blackfoot sings our National Anthem.

Match #1 – King Of The Ring Quarterfinals: Bam Bam Bigelow w/Luna Vachon vs. Razor Ramon
Luna has some words for The Bad Guy and he tosses his toothpick in her face, Bam Bam ambushes him from behind as the bell rings, clobbering him down to the mat. He sends Ramon to the ropes for a shoulder block, whips him back in for another, plants him with a body slam, drops a headbutt and follows with a big leg drop. Bigelow to the top turnbuckle for the Diving Headbutt, Razor rolls out of harm’s way, scores with big right hands, irish whip to the corner is reversed and The Bad Guy hits the turnbuckles hard.

The Beast from the East looks to send him back across, Ramon reverses, follows in and slides under the legs to the outside, trips Bam Bam up and yanks him in an unforgiving position into the ring post. The Bad Guy climbs back in, comes off the 2nd rope with a bulldog for a near fall, starts to target the left leg with elbow drops and grabs a heel hold. Bigelow kicks him away, goes for a kick that gets caught, tries to bring his other foot around for an enzuigiri, Ramon ducks it and then staggers him with a clothesline. He goes to the ropes for another and can’t bring Bam Bam down, tries once more, The Beast from the East side-steps it and uses the momentum to dump Razor over the top to the floor.

Bam Bam goes out and hits a couple of rights before rolling Ramon back in, clubs him in the back, loud “Razor” chants and Bigelow puts the boots to him for a count of 2. He clocks Razor with an enzuigiri for another 2 count, drives headbutts into the lower back, then powers him into a torture rack. The referee checks the arm, Ramon doesn’t let it drop on the third attempt, Bigelow can’t hold him up anymore, flips him over to his feet for a side headlock and The Bad Guy counters with a back suplex. Both guys stagger to their feet, Ramon blocks right hands and returns fire, irish whip to the corner is reversed, Bam Bam charges in and The Bad Guy side-steps out of the way.

He delivers a body slam, lifts him up to prop him on the top turnbuckle, Bigelow with a big back elbow to avoid it, then plants Razor with a body slam of his own. He scales the corner to go for the Bam Bamsault, Ramon pops to his feet, plants him into the canvas, stacks The Beast from the East up and gets a 3 count.
Winner: Razor Ramon (Bam Bamsault Counter)

  • EA’s TakeThis has nothing to do with the match, but I need to address it right off the bat…why on Earth is Art Donovan on commentary tonight? Just awful. Anyways, good to open the night and tournament with this one as Razor is  over and Bam Bam was one of the best heels in the company. Honestly, either of these guys would have been excellent choices to win the whole thing. In case you’re wondering, after retaining his Intercontinental Title at WrestleMania against Shawn Michaels, Ramon would lose it just a few short weeks later to The Heartbreak Kid’s bodyguard, Diesel.

Backstage: Todd Pettengill is standing at the King Of The Ring board with Irwin R. Schyster & Mabel with Oscar, opponents in our next tournament match. IRS informs Mabel he’s not worried about him and then next up will be Razor Ramon, then says he hopes 1-2-3 Kid makes it to the finals before walking off. Mabel thinks Schyster needs to stop thinking about Razor and be concerned with him, then states if he meets Ramon then he will learn who the real Bad Guy is.

Match #2 – King Of The Ring Quarterfinals: Irwin R. Schyster vs. Mabel w/Oscar
IRS tries to attack from behind after the bell, Mabel drives him head-first into the top turnbuckle over and over, levels him with a clothesline, then plants The Tax Man with a body slam. He hooks Schyster for a delayed vertical suplex, grabs a wristlock for clubbing blows to the back, brings him back to the canvas with a modified fireman’s carry takeover, then drops a massive elbow to the chest. Mabel shoots Irwin to the corner and follows him in for a splash, IRS side-steps it, delivers a knee to the back to send the big man to the outside and takes himself a breather in the ring.

Mabel rolls back into the squared circle, Schyster meets him with right hands, sends him off to the ropes and drops him with the Write-Off followed by multiple elbow drops for a count of 2. He attempts to pick Mabel up for a body slam, can’t lift the weight, Mabel counters to a small package for a quick 2 count and IRS swiftly starts putting the boots to him before slapping on a rear chinlock. The big man powers up to a standing position, backs Irwin into the turnbuckles to break the hold, hammers him with big punches, shoots him to the ropes and elevates him with a big back body drop.

Mabel runs him over with a clothesline, shoots Schyster back to the ropes for a high back elbow, then back in again for a sidewalk slam, nearly putting the match away. He drives IRS into the mat with another body slam, climbs to the 2nd rope, Irwin quickly shakes the ropes forcing Mabel to lose his balance, he crashes down to the canvas, Schyster with a cover using the ropes for leverage and he gets the win.
Winner: Irwin R. Schyster (Pinfall)

  • EA’s TakeHo-hum, pretty basic stuff here to get IRS to advance and meet Razor Ramon is the semi-finals. The company was trying out Mabel as a singles competitor for the first time as they still were enamored by Superstars of enormous size, but it wouldn’t last past the summer and he’d slide back into tag team action with Mo.

Video: Earlier in the day, Mr. Fuji & Jim Cornette were prepping Yokozuna & Crush for their match-up for the WWF Tag Team Titles tonight. Cornette says Fuji has his boys well prepared to take the championships tonight, Fuji stating he wants The Headshrinkers to be squashed and for his guys to walk out as the new champs.

Match #3 – King Of The Ring Quarterfinals: Tatanka vs. ‘The Rocket’ Owen Hart
Owen steps into the ring after his entrance and Tatanka immediately meets him with right hands, the bell sounds and The Native American whips him back and forth into the turnbuckles, elevates him with a back body drop and gains a quick 2 count. He executes a vertical suplex for another count of 2, The Rocket goes to the eyes to stop the onslaught, slows things down with a standing side headlock, The Native American pushes him off to the ropes and gets knocked down by a shoulder block.

Hart goes back to the ropes, Tatanka drops down, leapfrogs over and catches him with a hip toss, shoots him back to the ropes for a Japanese arm drag, then grabs a side headlock of his own. Owen shoves him off to the ropes, Tatanka with a big shoulder knockdown, goes back to the ropes, The Rocket drops down and uses the momentum to toss him over the top to the floor. The Native American back to his feet, sweeps Owen’s legs from the outside and drags him under the bottom rope, connects with a series of overhand chops, Hart returns fire and whips him shoulder-first into the ring post before rolling back inside.

We go backstage where IRS & Razor Ramon are involved in a shoving match, WWF officials having to step in between them as Tatanka pulls himself back into the ring in the arena. Owen drops him on the 2nd rope and chokes away, hits the ropes and drops all his weight onto the back with a seated senton, then rakes Tatanka’s face on the top rope. He plants The Native American with a gutwrench suplex, heads upstairs for a dropkick, hooks the leg and gains a near fall before grabbing a rear chinlock. Tatanka fights up to his feet, hits the ropes and ducks under a clothesline, The Rocket slaps on a sleeper hold and The Native American starts to fade down to the canvas.

The referee checks the arm, Tatanka shows some life on the third attempt, battles his way up, Owen clocks him with fists, drives him head-first into the top turnbuckle over and over, but it has little affect and The Native American goes into his war dance. He pummels The Rocket with knife-edge chops and punches, makes a cover for a count of 2, irish whip to the corner is reversed, Owen follows him in and runs into a boot to the jaw. The Native American spikes him with a DDT for a near fall, plants him with a body slam, heads to the top rope for an overhand chop, but still can’t get a 3 count.

Tatanka sends Hart to the corner and charges in behind, The Rocket looks to hop up and over, gets caught on The Native American’s shoulders, but Tatanka gets frustrated after another 2 count. He argues with the official about the count, catches Owen trying to sneak up from behind, irish whip to the ropes is reversed by The Rocket for a back body drop, Tatanka goes for a sunset flip, Hart drops down on top, hooks the legs and advances.
Winner: ‘The Rocket’ Owen Hart (Sunset Flip Counter)

  • EA’s TakeAnother bit of a “ho-hum” contest, but much better than the previous IRS/Mabel match. Owen is really on fire as a heel following his win over Bret at WrestleMania, a quarterfinals loss here would have made no sense whatsoever, no matter how over Tatanka was at the time.
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Chairshot Classics: WCW Monday Nitro Episode 19 (1/8/96)

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WCW Monday Nitro

From the North Charleston Coliseum, in Charleston, South Carolina, comes WCW Monday Nitro! Set up from the last episode, we have Hulk Hogan teaming with Randy Savage to take on Ric Flair and Arn Anderson. The other advertised matches are very intriguing as Lord Steven Regal battles Eddie Guerrero and Sting faces Diamond Dallas Page. A solid sounding lineup, especially those under card matches. Let’s see how it plays out!

Chris Benoit vs Alex Wright

Wright comes out to a sizable reaction, he definitely was a fan favorite. Benoit jumps him quickly and hits a solid snap suplex and back elbow. Wright tries to come back but takes a beautiful bridging northern lights suplex for a near fall. Benoit throws Wright outside and distracts the referee while Pillman at ringside chokes Alex for a bit. Wright sends Benoit over the top rope and Heenan asks if that’s a DQ? Was that still illegal at this point? Alex hits Chris with a big cross body from the top rope to the outside. Wright sinks in a deep boston crab before transitioning into an STF before Benoit gets out. Pillman trips Wright, but Wright launches himself over the top to drop him. Coming back into the ring, Benoit gets the upper hand with knees to the midsection. Benoit hooks and drops a dragon suplex with a bridge to pick up the pinfall. Fun little match here, lots of fun back and forth action.

Winner: Chris Benoit via pinfall

Lord Steven Regal vs Eddie Guerrero

Great chain wrestling to start this matchup, they go back and forth, trading holds and counters. Eddie counters a double arm suplex with an arm drag before a nearfall exchange is ended when Regal pokes Guerrero’s eyes. Regal takes control with a big European uppercut and several more strikes before hitting a nice reverse suplex, a move that is very underutilized in my opinion. Eddie reverses a pinning attempt for a nearfall before eating a big back elbow from Regal. Regal is in control with strikes and out of nowhere, Eddie drops Regal with a backslide and picks up the shocking win. This was a very fun match, but I would have liked something twice as long.

Winner: Eddie Guerrero

Mean Gene is on the ramp with Sting and Lex Luger. Sting asks Lex about Starrcade why he pulled Sting down before he could get back into the ring, costing Sting a chance at the title. Lex claimed he got hurt and was reaching for help and asked Sting to give him a chance at redemption as a tag team against the Blue Bloods at Clash of the Champions. Sting agrees and it is set.

Sting vs Diamond Dallas Page

DDP gets Sting with the cigar in the eye to start the match and gains the upper hand. Sting counters with a double axe handle, a dropkick that sends DDP out of the ring followed by a cross body over the top rope. Strange spot where Sting goes for a leapfrog and initially it looked like Sting came up too early, but he sold like a low blow. No DQ, but DDP is in control with a belly to back suplex and swinging neckbreaker. DDP grounds Sting with a rear chin lock and plants his feet on the ropes but denies it to referee, Nick Patrick. Sting tries to counter out with a top wrist lock but DDP gets a handful of hair to drag him back down to the mat. Sting fights out with a facebuster and some big strikes before hitting a reverse atomic drop and big dropkick to send DDP into the corner. Sting hits the Stinger Splash but can’t get the Scorpion Death Lock in. DDP hits another neckbreaker and a thumb to the eyes out of a pinfall attempt. Sting counters a kick and locks on the Scorpion Death Lock and DDP taps out. This was another fun match with two great guys in the ring.

Winner: Sting via submission

Ric Flair and Arn Anderson vs Randy Savage and Hulk Hogan

Flair and Hogan start us off, and Hogan gets his hits in, a big boot, some clotheslines and bodyslams to both Flair and Anderson. Arn is tagged in and in comes Savage as well. Anderson tries to suplex Savage out of the ring, but Savage counters it, sending him to the outside with a big boot from Hogan. Savage hits a double axe handle from the top rope to the outside of the ring and one to the inside. Arn tags in Flair who tries to go to the top rope, but Hogan sends him off the top. Hogan and Savage lock on figure 4 leg locks but the Horsemen get out. Anderson sends Savage outside and into the guardrail before feeding him back in to Flair. Flair hits a big belly to back suplex and tags in Anderson. Flair is back in and hits a shin breaker and attempts the figure 4, but Savage rolls him up a couple of times for near falls. Flair comes back with a couple of vicious sounding chops. Savage gets the hot tag to Hogan and he’s in on fire. Back body drops, and clotheslines with a double clothesline to send them both outside. Anderson back and and hits a big spinebuster, but Hogan no sells it, Hulks up, big boot, leg drop, pinfall. Pillman and Benoit come down and fights with the Dungeon of Doom. The Giant comes in and gives chokelsams to both Hogan and Savage. Hogan barely got up in the air for it, looked kinda sad. The show goes off the air after that exchange.

Winner: Hogan and Savage via pinfall

So, we had a pretty fun show here with some good matches. Stories are still being made clear as we work towards Clash of the Champions. It’ll be interesting to see how the next few months play out as we are going to get into some intriguing angles.


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Chairshot Classics: NWA-TNA Episode 15: Night of Chumpions

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On this week’s episode, EVERY title belt is on the line! Jerry Lynn defends the X-Division Title against AJ Styles in a ladder match, Ron Killings defends the NWA Title against Lo-Ki, and Chris Harris and James Storm defend the Tag Titles against Ron Harris and a mystery partner.

Also, the war of words between Jarrett, his crew and the DX/NWO merger continues. The Maximos and Flying Elvises compete for a big opportunity. Siaki takes his first steps in one-on-one competition without the Elvises against a familiar face.

So how’d they do? Let’s find out!

 We start off with a DX reunion! Syxx Pac and BG James make their way to the ring and James wants to do some smack talk. He and Syxx have been everywhere and have done that. However, both think TNA is a fresh start. They address Jarrett and Brian Lawler and, using Gilligan’s Island for an analogy, say that they’re in for a shipwreck (which one’s Gilligan?). As for Ron Killings, neither man is very impressed with him, stating that the future is in danger if Ron Killings is that future, stating that Killings isn’t ready.

Syxx gets on the mic, not happy that Lo-Ki, who he claims to like a great deal, is getting a title shot against Killings, a shot he thinks either himself or James should be getting because Lo-Ki isn’t in their league yet and that Truth should be taken care of by them.

Aren’t they supposed to be the babyfaces?

At this point, Killings comes out, claiming that all Pac and James want is his championship. He asserts that he is the future of pro-wrestling and that he only gives title shots to those who are like him and don’t have silver spoons hanging out of, and I quote, ‘their cracker asses’.

By this point, Syxx has had enough of Killings and his race cards and tells killings that the only thing hanging out of his (Killings) ass is going to be Syxx’s foot.

Now, Jarrett comes out to save us all, wondering why Hall is missing from the team and mocking Hall’s well-known substance abuse problems. James takes offense to that, warning Jarrett to keep his mouth shut about Hall since Hall isn’t there to defend himself, or kick Jarrett’s ass. Jarrett replies that he only cares because Hall’s screwed up the card, there’s supposed to be a six-man tag tonight, but it’ll have to be a handicap match: Pac and James vs Jarrett, Killings and…

At this point, Lawler and Elix Skipper sneak into the ring and attack DX from behind. DX gets the upper hand and throws Lawler and Skipper out of the ring where team leader Jarrett corrals his boys.

Tenay and West give us a rundown of the card and say they’ll try to get a hold of Scott Hall to find out why he’s not there.

Amazing Red vs Shark Boy: Red is out first to a good pop. Shark Boy gets an okay pop.  For some reason, Elix Skipper is on commentary and his voice is too annoying to listen to for more than a minute. He sounds like a very annoying Chris Tucker. This match was, despite the stupid shark thing, a pretty okay match. I’m not sure why Shark Boy chose such a stupid gimmick because he’s not a terrible wrestler. Mortimer Plumtree is back, still creepy, and still creepily watching the X-Division.

This match is basically all Shark Boy since Red doesn’t seem to have much wrestling skill outside of flying around. Red finally gets the pinfall after reversing a blockbuster attempt and hitting a Phoenix splash and a standing crossbody splash.

Winner: Amazing Red by pinfall.

Comment: That was an okay opening match.

After the match, Skipper attacks Red, for some reason, security tries to intervene, but it takes Don Harris to finally restore order.

Seriously, dude, hire better security guards.

We get a recap of the end of last week’s Lynn/Killings match and how several members of the X-Division help Lynn retain his title, including Lo-Ki.

Backstage, Goldylocks is talking to Lo-Ki and asks him about his title match against Killings. Lo-Ki promises to get to that, but he’s more concerned with Syxx-Pac’s comments at the start of the show. Unsurprisingly, he’s offended by Syxx-Pac’s comments tells him to mark it down in his book who started what. As for Killings, as far as Lo-Ki sees it, Killings has had it out for the X-Division because they get much more attention than his own title reign. He then says this title match is because he put himself in a position to make a difference because Jerry Lynn got screwed out of being NWA Champion. He says that Truth is unprepared, preoccupied, and unfocused and that he’s going to prove that it’s not the size of the fighter, it’s the size of the fight in the fighter. Or, as Eddie Guererro would say ‘It’s no the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog’.

We were going to get a tag match here, but apparently, Killings didn’t like what Lo-Ki had to say. For those keeping score, the reason Lo-Ki was given a title shot has changed for the third time. First we were told that it was because he helped Lynn beat Killings last week, then Killings claimed that he gave him the shot because Lo-Ki didn’t have a silver spoon hanging out his ass, now Killings is claiming that he gave Lo-Ki the shot because he felt sorry for him. He repeats that Lo-Ki will have to kill him to take the title. He then tells Lo-Ki to get his punk ass out there, so the NWA Heavyweight Championship match is happening now.

FYI: While this was going on, the crowd was chanting ‘Overrated’ at Killings.

NWA World Heavyweight Championship: Ron Killings vs Lo-Ki: Well, whatever the motive is for giving Lo-Ki a title shot, the match is a happenin’! Killings is on Lo-Ki as soon as Lo-Ki slides in and we’re on.It takes a couple of minutes for Lo-Ki to get his bearings, but once he does, we have a real match.

Unlike Killings’ previous title defenses, this one is actually worth watching again. Killings and Lo-Ki worked really well together and there was good chemistry. Killings tried to steal the win by blatantly putting his feet on the ropes for leverage. It actually looked like Lo-Ki could pull this one out, but Killings hit his True Conviction, a sitout facebuster from the second turnbuckle and that is the end of that.

Winner: Ron Killings by pinfall.

Comment: That was really good.

Killings gets back on the mic, but before he can say anything, he’s jumped from behind by someone in a white hoodie and white ski-mask, because having a light skinned person in a hood and a covered face beating up an African American man doesn’t look bad or anything. It’s ‘edgy’.

Anyway!

Back to our regularly scheduled match. The Maximos are taking on the Flying Elvises to win a shot at the Tag Team Champions next week.

The Maximos vs Jorge Estrada and Jimmy Yang: Both teams get pretty good pop. This will be the first outing of the Elvises since Sonny Siaki officially left the group last week.

Unrelated note: I’m not sure who ‘Athena’ is as far as TNA goes, but she seems to have a lot of fans in the crowd who want to see her wrestle.

Anyway, this match was ‘eh’. The Maximos were really outmatched by the Elivses at every step and there were a lot of botches. Added to all that was Mortimer Plumtree, who still seems to be scouting the X-Division, and Sonny Siaki, who seems to be watching his old crew from the ramp.

For some strange reason, Siaki jumps on the apron, acting like he wanted to be tagged in, for an equally strange reason, Estrada believes him and goes for the tag, only for Siaki to get off the apron and head to the back, leaving his former teammate to his fate. The Maximos hit their elevated double team DDT and that’s it.

Winner: Maximos by pinfall.

Comment: What the hell was that?

Backstage is trying to get an interview with Siaki when Siaki is attacked by Jerry Lynn. Siaki is saved by Styles, who holds Lynn for Siaki to hit while yelling ‘stop’ at the same time. To add further insult to injury, they stuff Lynn in a production case, AJ sits on it and tells Siaki that he’s lucky that Bob Armstrong didn’t see it.

Uh…yeah.

Sonny Siaki vs David Young: Well, Siaki’s back to an okay pop and he’s greased himself up at some point. Anyway, his opponent is David Young, a hapless guy who had the misfortune of having Bobcat for a manager. Apparently, Young has ditched Bobcat, much to Borash’s relief and is focusing on being a top competitor.

This match was pretty good, but not a standout. This is basically the third X-Division match of the night and the crowd’s getting bored. Young is trying to hang, but this match is just blah. Young had a chance to get a pin but chose to go for a moonsault instead and missed when Siaki moved out of the way. Siaki hits his Money Clip and that’s that.

Winner: Sonny Siaki by pinfall.

Comment: That was an okay match, but after at least three high-flying matches, this didn’t really stand out.

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