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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Live Results & Report! (3/12/19)

SmackDown promises to answer: Why, Shane, Why?

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SmackDown promises that Mr. Vince McMahon will address his treatment of Kofi Kingston while Shane will explain his betrayal of The Miz!

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • 8 Man Tag: Aleister Black, Ricochet & The Hardy Boyz VS Shinsuke Nakamura, Rusev & The Bar; No Contest.
  • Asuka VS Sonya Deville w/ Mandy Rose; Asuka wins.
  • Rey Mysterio & R-Truth w/ Carmella VS Samoa Joe & Andrade Almas w/ Zelina Vega; Mysterio & Truth win.
  • Daniel Bryan & Rowan VS Kevin Owens & Mustafa Ali; Bryan & Rowan win.

PLAY BY PLAY

Here comes the Money~!

SmackDown opens with Shane McMahon and a chorus of boos. Dayton isn’t that far from Cleveland, and everyone saw what Shane did to The Miz after their loss at Fastlane. Shane stands in the ring with the Best in the World trophy as he takes a mic. Fans tell Shane “You Suck!” before he speaks. Shane waits for the jeers to die down then asks the ring announcer to join him. He tells the announcer what to say. “Ladies and gentlemen, the Best in the World, Shane McMahon.” Fans boo even harder but Shane isn’t done. He GRABS the announcer and makes him say it like he means it. “The Best in the World, Shaaane, McMahon!” Not good enough! “The BEST in the Wooooooorld~! Shaaane, McMaaaahon!” Fans boo but Shane is finally satisfied.

Shane finally addresses the fans’ questions. Why did he beat down his “Co-Besty?” Because he is sick and tired of the annoyances in his life. He’s not just talking about the WWE Universe, the WWE superstars, but also the WWE employees. “Shane, what can I do for you to help me get ahead in life?” Fans chant “We Want Kofi!” but Shane ignores them. Shane’s entire life, people have kissed up to him for their own benefit. No one knows what Shane does for them behind the scenes each and every day! Everyone else wants Shane to help them, but that stopped Sunday when he “beat the holy hell” out of The Miz in his hometown.

Shane says he’s not the Best in the World because he won a trophy, or because he became a tag team champion. He’s the best because he was born that way. Fans boo because they don’t agree. But Shane says he’s only going to do things for himself. Which is why beating Miz down was so good. Especially choking The Miz out in front of Papa Miz’s “baked potato face”. It was so liberating! And that sparked something in Shane that he won’t let go out. The WWE Universe just has to get used to this. And for The Miz, this is not a request but an order because Shane’s the boss. Shane had such a great time beating Miz’s ass, it will continue on the Grandest Stage of Them All, Wrestlemania! Miz better get ready for another Best in the World beating, because it will be AWESOME!

 

8 Man Tag: Aleister Black, Ricochet & The Hardy Boyz VS Shinsuke Nakamura, Rusev & The Bar!

The last time the Unexpected Duo was on SmackDown, they ended up having to fight off the Swiss Cyborg, Celtic Gladiator, Bulgarian Brute and King of Japanese Strong Style. Team Xtreme came to their rescue, and now we have a star-studded and internationally flavored opening match! Will Matt & Jeff help Ricochet and Aleister make four major players #FadetoBlack?

SmackDown returns as entrances finish up. The teams sort out and it will be Nakamura and Aleister to start. Nakamura and Aleister square up and give tests kicks. Aleister gets caught but gives back the strike fest! He drags Nakamura over and Ricochet tags in. They double whip and speed things up, Kitchen Sink and standing moonsault! Cover, TWO! Ricochet stays on Nakamura and fires the fans up as he tags in Matt Hardy! Nakamura gets free as fans chant “DELETE! DELETE!” Sheamus tags in and kicks Matt low. Sheamus clubs Matt and scoops but Matt slips out. Matt boots back and hops up for an elbow drop. The shirt comes off and tag to Jeff! The Hardy Boyz work together, leg drop combo! Cover, TWO!

Jeff keeps on Sheamus with a chinlock but Cesaro distracts. Sheamus hits Jeff then tags to Cesaro. Cesaro stomps away then mocks the Hardy leg drop. Cover, TWO! Cesaro drags Jeff by his hair and bumps him off buckles. Tag to Rusev and they mug Jeff on the ropes. Rusev rams his shoulder in over and over but backs off at 4. The rest of his team choke Jeff in the distraction! They let Jeff go and Rusev wrangles him into a chinlock. Fans rally and Jeff endures. Jeff fights up but Rusev drags him back down. Fans continue to rally and Jeff fights his way back up. Jeff elbows free but Rusev pulls him down by his hair! Rusev plays innocent while fans boo. Rusev stomps Jeff then puts him back in the corner.

Tag to Sheamus and they mug Jeff more. Tag to Nakamura and he stomps away. It becomes a stomp cycle! Jeff fights back on Rusev, and hot tag to Ricochet! The One and Only rallies but Rusev reverses the whip. Ricochet rolls off his back then handsprings to headscissor! Dropkick, too! Ricochet rams his shoulder in and fights off Nakamura. Rusev intercepts the slingshot with a haymaker! Aleister defends Ricochet as Cesaro and Nakamura come over while we go to picture in picture.

Ricochet shakes the cobwebs out and Cesaro fetches him. Cesaro bumps him off the announce desk then gut wrenches him back into the ring! Cesaro wraps another chinlock on but fans rally up for Ricochet. Ricochet fights but Sheamus tags in. The Bar mug and whip Ricochet for the Bar Lariat! Sheamus drops the knee and puts on a chinlock of his own. He bends Ricochet back but Ricochet finds a way out. Rusev tags in and clubbers Ricochet down. Rusev drops elbows and covers, TWO! Ricochet crawls but Rusev is on him. Rusev brings Ricochet up to the top rope and tags in Nakamura. Nakamura struts before hitting the Top Shelf Knee! Cover, TWO! Nakamura keeps on Ricochet with his own chinlock. Fans rally again as Ricochet endures the knee in his back. Nakamura drops a knee on Ricochet’s front!

Tag to Cesaro and the mugging resumes. Cesaro rocks Ricochet with a big European Uppercut! Cesaro drags Ricochet up and shoves him back. Ricochet fights out of the corner with furious forearms! But Rusev tags in, and he kicks Ricochet’s legs out. Cesaro and Rusev stomp away then Rusev hits Matt Hardy for good measure! Rusev drags Ricochet back and tags in Sheamus. They mug Ricochet more, then Sheamus gives Ricochet a backbreaker. Sheamus returns to his special chinlock as we return to single picture.

Fans continue to rally but Sheamus shoves Ricochet. Ricochet dumps Sheamus out! Cesearo hurries to help him back in, and then tags in. Cesaro goes right at Aleister with a boot! But Ricochet back drops him! Ricochet crawls, hot tag to Matt! Matt rallies on everyone as fans chant “DELETE! DELETE!” Matt gives “DELETE!” buckle bumps! Tag to Jeff and the brothers double whip Cesaro corner to corner. Poetry in Motion to a Side Effect! BROGUE for Matt! Pump knee for Sheamus! Roundhouse for Aleister! Springboard flying uppercut for Rusev! Dynamic Dropkick for Ricochet! Twist of Fate for Nakamura! Roll up for Jeff, TWO! Twist of Fate for Cesaro! Jeff tosses the shirt aside and climbs up top. SWANTON BOMB! Cover, but Sheamus, Nakamura AND Rusev break it!

Matt and Sheamus brawl with haymakers, and then more brawls break out! All eight superstars throw haymakers and kicks! So here come THE NEW DAY!? They attack EVERYONE!

No Contest

Big E, Xavier Woods and Kofi Kingston toss out anyone they can and stomp the rest! Fans are as fired up as they are, as Woods wrecks Sheamus with a dropkick! Big E grabs Sheamus and throws him into steel steps! Then Big E comes around to wreck Cesaro with help from Kofi! Woods and Kofi keep Nakamura and Rusev down with stomps. They sit Nakamura up for Woods to hit the Shining Wizard! Then they drag Rusev up for Kofi to hit Trouble in Paradise! The New Day stand tall and Dayton is right behind them! Will this influence Vince McMahon’s supposed Wrestlemania opportunity?

 

The Usos speak in the bowels of the arena.

They like The New Day’s new attitude. But which team is gonna run up to Jimmy & Jey? Is it “Swiss Cheese and the Light Mayo?” What about Rusev & Shinsuke? Aleister & Ricochet? It don’t matter anyways! That leaves one last team. The brothers like the Usos, but they ain’t like the Usos. The Usos want any and all teams to run up and get done up! They’ll welcome EVERYONE to the Uso Penitentiary!

 

Randy Orton is here!

The Viper heads to the ring and he has something to say, after the break.

SmackDown returns and Orton stands in the ring with a mic. “There’s something I gotta get off my chest.” This is the House that AJ Styles Built? Well then in 2002, Styles was wrestling in some high school gymnasium while Orton was here making his WWE in-ring debut. In 2004, Styles was shaking hands with opponents in bingo halls while Orton was the youngest WWE Champion ever. In 2005, Styles was in Florida getting a tan with Dixie Carter while Orton was here facing The Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Orton continues on to say that 2006, 2007 all the way to 2014, Orton was champion! This isn’t the House AJ Styles Built, it was the house built long before Styles was ever here! This is the House Randy Orton Built! But speaking of AJ Styles, he appears!

The Phenomenal One heads to the ring and picks up a mic to retort. “Wow, Randy. For someone who looks down on the indies, you sure did follow my career pretty closely.” But Styles is flattered. And he’s right, he’s indy made and damn proud of it. It’s been said that guys like Orton weren’t made for that world but for the WWE. Which is good because Orton wouldn’t have made it in Styles’ world. Not with things like his weird pose and a “knockoff Diamond Cutter.” Wait a second. Is Styles saying that none of those indy pals of his never ripped anybody off? Too Sweet. Good one, good one. But take a look around backstage: Orton is surrounded by those indy pals. They all earned the right to be in the WWE. They didn’t have their daddy get them a job.

Styles talks Orton’s career now. Orton had the stroke of Triple H, the intelligence of Ric Flair and the muscle of Batista backing him to make sure he didn’t fail. Orton says he’s accomplished more before he was 24 than anyone in this industry could ever dream! A 13-time world champion and two-time Royal Rumble winner who has been to 15 Wrestlemanias and any other PPV! But Evolution was where it started. And the Legacy. And Rated RKO! No wait, better yet, the Wyatt Family. Orton sure had a lot of babysitters. Stylse knows Orton is exactly what he is. He is a viper who uses everyone else up. Which is why Styles made sure to get the jump on Orton, so he won’t be another victim.

Orton says Styles has no choice. As long as Styles is renting a room in Orton’s house, he has to answer to him. And rent is due. Make it out to the three most destructive letters in sports entertainment: R K O. Well if Orton wants his rent, come take it at Wrestlemania! Whose house will it be after these two meet on the Grandest Stage of Them All?

 

Asuka VS Sonya Deville w/ Mandy Rose!

The Empress of Tomorrow put away God’s Greatest Creation because the Gladiator Gal was doing too much on the outside. But now Asuka looks to show Fire & Desire that neither of them are ready for her! Will that be true when Sonya puts her hair up and squares up?

SmackDown returns as Fire & Desire make their entrance. The bell rings and Sonya circles with Asuka. They tie up and Asuka avoids Sonya’s takedown but Sonya slips out of the facelock. They go around and Sonya gets a ropebreak before Asuka gets the heel hook. Sonya kicks Asuka back but Asuka catches one to hit back. Asuka gives kicks now, then bounces Sonya’s head off the mat! Sonya counters the buzzsaw to a roll up, TWO! Asuka kicks and whips but Sonya reverses. Asuka runs the ropes but misses the dropkick, Sonya SPEARS! Cover, TWO! Sonya knees Asuka’s ribs and covers, TWO! Sonya stalks Asuka to the corner while fans rally up. She toys with Asuka but Asuka gets mad. Asuka SLAPS Sonya, then throws forearms. Asuka fires off palm strikes and body shots, then the pop-up knee! Sliding Wizard!

Sonya bails out but Asuka runs in. She wrecks Mandy instead! Sonya puts Asuka in and forearms Asuka back. Mandy drags herself up but pulls the apron skirt down! It causes Sonya to stagger, Asuka rocks her with a roundhouse! Then the Asuka Lock! Sonya taps, Asuka wins!

Winner: Asuka, by submission

Fire & Desire cost each other again! The Empress sweeps and leaves them behind on the Road to Wrestlemania, but will Sonya and Mandy be able to patch things up?

 

The IIconics speak.

“Oooh… Sonya and Mandy are always in each other’s way.” That’s definitely not IIconic. But Billie Kay & Peyton Royce claim Sasha Banks & Bayley are ducking them. The WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions are still champions, congrats! Pbbbt. They can’t run forever, they will have to come to SmackDown, where the future is IICONIC! Strike the pose. Billie & Peyton want to go BFF’s VS BFF’s, but will The Boss & Hug be too busy for the Blue Brand?

 

Becky Lynch is here!

And she tosses aside her crutch! The Man may not be 100% but she feels so much better after Fastlane. What will she have to say about Ronda Rousey’s assistance? We find out after the break.

SmackDown returns, and Becky shares how great it feels to be walking down the ramp on her own. Everyone got brave when she got hurt, then suspended, then un-suspended, then re-suspended and arrested and out of the biggest match of her career. “But The Man is back!” She’s back on her feet and back in the main event of Wrestlemania! This was the match she set in motion when she picked Ronda Rousey only for Charlotte to be shoehorned in. And then Becky had to earn her way back in her match twice! “Lads, do you know how hard it is to play mind-games on a woman with no brain?” But Becky did it! She got “Ronnie” so wound up, she did all this for her. Thanks, ya lil’ weirdo. Becky will pay her back by taking her arm and her title.

Becky doesn’t care if it’s the golden girl or the rowdy one, she will reclaim what they’ve tried to give someone else. And speaking of, here comes Charlotte! The Queen has a mic of her own. “First off, congratulations.” Becky finally gets in Charlotte’s main event. While Becky was suspended and arrested, Charlotte put in all the work. Charlotte’s resume speaks for itself, but she tells Becky it’s one thing to be hot for six months. Charlotte’s been hot for four years! That’s why Vince chose her! So she could get the job done. But does Becky know why the fans love her? Because they pity her. Charlotte pitied Becky. Ronda pitied her.

And no matter how much Becky spins it, that was a hand-out at Fastlane. Charlotte has never seen someone do so little yet take credit for so much. That’s why Charlotte will make Becky and Ronda relevant when they bow down! “Aw shut yer face, ya dope!” Becky’s the reason women are main-eventing at Wrestlemania. They don’t need a Queen, they need The Man. Fans agree as they chant for Becky. Will Becky stand tall against Queen and Baddest Woman?

 

Backstage interview with Daniel Bryan and Rowan.

What was going on in Mr. McMahon’s office? It was a private discussion. Did it have to do with Kofi Kingston? Yes, actually. As WWE Champion, Planet’s Champion, and a winner in a surprise Triple Threat, Bryan wanted to give Vince some feedback before the announcement tonight. What was Vince’s reaction? Bryan and Rowan are in a match tonight, against Mustafa Ali and Kevin Owens. Will the Beacon of Light and Prizefighter be able to get even on Bryan and Big Red tonight?

 

Rey Mysterio & R-Truth w/ Carmella VS Samoa Joe & Andrade Almas w/ Zelina Vega!

After two Fatal 4 Ways for the United States Championship, these four men choose sides for a tag match! Will the King of Lucha Libre and John Cena’s biggest fan be able to overcome the Destroyer and El Idolo?

SmackDown returns as entrances finish and teams sort out. Truth starts against Almas and they circle. They tie up and Almas elbows Truth hard. Almas whips Truth tot he corner but Truth goes up and over to hip toss Almas down! Truth does the splits and runs, and hits Almas with the elbow! He asks the fans “What’s up?!” and tags in Mysterio. Wheelbarrow assist for headscissors on Almas! Mysterio runs but Almas blocks the destroyer. Mysterio makes it a huricanrana to put Almas on the ropes! But Joe tags in to slam Mysterio down! Joe jabs away and stomps Mysterio, to then toss him out of the ring! Zelina taunts Mysterio while we go picture in picture.

Joe fetches Mysterio and gives him headbutts. Joe puts Mysterio back in the ring and scoops him for a big slam. He drops a big elbow, then kicks Mysterio around. Joe tags Almas and Almas runs to dropkick Mysterio back down. Cover, TWO! Almas drags Mysterio away from Truth to stomp him out more. Almas tags Joe and they mug Mysterio while Zelina applauds. Joe drags Mysterio up for a neck wrench but fans rally up. Mysterio fights out but Joe knees back. Joe powerbombs Mysterio down! High stack cover, TWO, to Boston Crab! Joe pulls back on Mysterio then shifts to a crossface while we return to single picture.

Mysterio endures being pulled back as Joe shifts to a Rings of Saturn. Truth kicks Joe to save Mysterio! Joe tags Almas as fans chant “What’s up!?” with Truth. Zelina is annoyed by those chants but Almas knees Mysterio. Almas hits Uno Amigo, then Dos Amigos. Almas goes for Tres but takes time to gloat. Mysterio slips out, Mexican Destroyer! Both men are down but fans rally up. Mysterio crawls for Truth but Zelina grabs his feet! Carmella yanks Zelinda down! HOt tag to Truth! Truth references Cena with the shoulder tackles and spin-out bomb! And “You Can’t See Me!” Five Knuckle Shuffle! Truth fireman’s carry but Joe tags in! Almas slips out so Truth dodges and calf kicks Joe. Truth kicks then tags Mysterio.

Joe dodges to SUPERKICK Truth! Mysterio springboards and dropkicks to put Joe on ropes! Dial it up, but Almas intercepts, only to end up beside Joe! DOUBLE 619! Mysterio splashes Almas but Joe sentons! Urenage, but victory roll! Mysterio & Truth win!!

Winners: Rey Mysterio & R-Truth, Mysterio pinning

The King of Lucha pins the United States Champion! Does this mean Mysterio gets the next shot at Samoa Joe’s title? Joe takes his anger out on Truth with an URENAGE! And one for Almas, too! Mysterio helps Truth get away before anything worse happens. Will Joe be the one to destroy Mysterio’s legacy instead of Almas?

 

Daniel Bryan & Rowan VS Kevin Owens & Mustafa Ali!

The Planet’s Champion survived two opponents at Fastlane, but did have help from his Redwood Bodyguard. Now the Prizefighter and Beacon of Light team up to exact some revenge! Will they be denied or satisfied after tonight?

SmackDown returns again as Mustafa Ali makes his entrance, followed by Bryan and Rowan. Teams sort out and Kevin starts against Bryan. They tie up and Kevin gets a headlock. Bryan powers out but Kevin runs him over. Things speed up and Kevin runs Bryan over! Back senton, too! Kevin drags Bryan up but Bryan scrambles away to tag Rowan. Rowan and Kevin brawl and Rowan puts Kevin in the corner. Kevin still hits back but Rowan runs him over with a shoulder! Bryan cheers Rowan on as he drags Kevin up by his face. Rowan grinds his forearm in but Kevin elbows and PELES! Hot tag to Ali! Ali leaps in but Rowan catches him easy. Rowan suplexes but Ali slips out to bait him into the corner. Ali roundhouses then somersaults for Rowan’s tackle! Rowan hits Kevin for good measure.

Rowan stands on Ali’s chest, then tags Bryan. The Planet’s defenders mug Ali, and Bryan goes after his leg. Bryan wrenches the knee then pulls Ali’s face into a chinlock. Fans rally and Ali fights out. Ali runs but Bryan elbows him down. Bryan brings Ali up fast for a snap Half Hatch suplex! Cover, TWO, but into a sideways Bow ‘n’ Arrow! Bryan uses torturous innovation while we go to break.

SmackDown returns yet again as Rowan rams Ali into a corner, Canadian torture rack style! Tag to Bryan and Bryan throws hands on Ali as he climbs. Bryan hits a Butterfly SUPERPLEX! Cover, TWO! But Bryan goes right for the Lebell Lock! Ali scrambles for ropes and gets them with a foot! Bryan lets go at 4, and reminds the referee of the rule. Bryan drags Ali up for a big EuroUpper. He trash talks Ali as he gives him another. Bryan soaks up the heat before bringing Ali up to whip. Ali kicks back then runs for a flapjack dropkick! Fans rally as Ali crawls for his corner! Bryan intercepts and drags him back, but Ali slips out of the back suplex to a backstabber! Cover, but Rowan breaks it!

Kevin goes after Rowan but the stunner is denied. Kevin denies the claw slam and SUPERKICKS! Ali and Kevin DOUBLE SUPERKICK! Kevin aims at Rowan but Rowan intercepts the cannonball to toss Kevin itno barriers. Ali wrecks Rowan with a dropkick but Bryan has a waistlock. Ali standing switches and rolls up, TWO! Bryan has it, TWO! Tag to Rowan, but Ali elbows Bryan away. Ali hops up but into Rowan’s paws! CLAW SLAM! Cover, Rowan & Bryan win!

Winners: Rowan & Daniel Bryan, Rowan pinning

The Redwood does his part to protect the Planet’s Champion, and now both roll down the Road to Wrestlemania.

Vince McMahon appears!

The Chairman walks out to the ring because it’s finally time to hear what he has to say to Kofi Kingston. We’ll find out what that is, after one last break.

SmackDown returns once more, and Vince McMahon stands in the ring with a mic. He says he’s here to give the fans and Kofi Kingston what he wants. Vince is here to give Kofi an opportunity to compete for the WWE Championship at Wrestlemania. Now Vince wants to explain the misunderstanding at Fastlane. The New Day reasoned with Vince to make the title match a Triple Threat. Vince agreed, but he forgot to mention how it wasn’t with Kofi. And he forgot to mention that Kofi’s match at Fastlane would be a Tornado Handicap Match against The Bar. Vince says fans hear what we wanna hear, because he never said explicitly that Kofi would be in a title match. Kofi had a match and he lost. Vince did it for a reason. Everything is a teachable moment, but The New Day is done listening! They come out to confront Vince!

The New Day is still steaming even after wrecking eight other superstars at the start of the night. Kofi has the fans behind him as he and the others have mics. Big E says they’re not in the mood to be taught a damn thing. And Woods says they’re done holding their tongues. The New Day do everything for this company! They’ve never complained or threatened to live and yet they’re still treated like garbage! Kofi has been here for 11 YEARS! He deserves better! He deserves more! Vince says Kofi doesn’t deserve a damn thing! Neither do the fans! Even Vince doesn’t deserve anything, and he created the WWE! No one deserves anything. No, this is bigger than just opinion. This is bigger than the New Day, or even Vince’s massive ego. There’s nothing bigger than that.

Well if no one deserves anything, but they’ve earned this! Kofi has defeated great WWE champions when they were champions, yet he never got his shot! And that’s just one of many reasons why Kofi IS deserving of a match for the WWE Championship. The WWE Universe has one demand: Kofi Kingston gets his fair shot for the title! And fans let Vince hear it directly! Vince wishes Kofi did deserve that, really. Vince has known Kofi a long time and is a pretty good judge of talent. If Kofi was worthy, it would’ve happened by now. Vince knows Kofi is impressive, extraordinary, and has reached incredible heights. “But let’s face it, Kofi.” Kofi will be in the Hall of Fame, but only as part of The New Day.

Kofi’s smart, right? He’s the older man, he can just coast with Big E and Woods doing the work. Vince wishes Kofi was up to par, but he’s just not. This is not an insult, but Vince was speaking with Bryan, and Bryan hit it on the mark: Kofi’s awesome, but he’s a B+ Player. Kofi keeps Big E and Woods calm as he says that he’s not asking for a free ride or a hand-out or demanding anything. But 11 years ago, Kofi was a kid with a dream. That dream has all but come true. He provides for his family while doing what he loves. But Kofi would hope that somewhere along those 11 years, that he proved himself worthy. Yet Vince says he doesn’t see it?

Kofi doesn’t complain about anything, like showing up week in and week out but other people pass him up. He doesn’t complain that Vince needs Kofi here instead of home for weddings, birthdays and holidays! He’s never been trick-or-treating with his kids, because he’s been here. Two days ago, Kofi’s son lost his first tooth! But Kofi missed that happiness when the Tooth Fairy gave him money for the tooth. Kofi never complains about those who go ahead of him, about the time away from home, or how Vince never seems to let people like Kofi compete for the title. He won’t complain, but he just needs Vince to say here, man to man, what it is that Kofi needs to do to earn a shot, so that he can go and do it! The fans believe in Kofi.

But here comes Randy Orton!? Vince says that all Kofi has to do is beat The Viper. Then he’s in! Samoa Joe comes out, too? Well, yes, beat that man, too. But then The Bar appears?! Oh, and them. And even Rowan!? Kofi has to run the gauntlet to get to Wrestlemania!? And the gauntlet goes after them! The New Day fight off The Bar, they fight off Samoa Joe, and they fight off Rowan! Bryan gets Rowan clear and Orton stays out of it completely as Kofi gives Cesaro a Trouble in Paradise! “That could be YOU, Daniel!!” Kofi is fired up, but can he make it through five intimidating opponents in one night to finally have his shot?

 


 

My Thoughts:

A really great SmackDown here, with some good stuff to move us further towards Wrestlemania. Shane’s explanation for why he turned on Miz wasn’t exactly what I expected, but it’s not a bad reason. It at least works with how Miz more or less used Shane to make good with his own father. Miz VS Shane will be fun, and I would think Miz wins as the hero of this story. That opening 8 Man Tag was great, and The New Day attacking didn’t even really ruin it. It was great to see The New Day show some aggression after all this time. The Usos have another great backstage promo, and I’m wondering if there will be a big tag match to determine contenders. Saving the Hardys for last, I wonder if it’ll be Usos VS Hardys in the end, and that match could go either way.

I was hoping for a bit more out of Asuka VS Sonya, but it sounds like we’re building to Sonya VS Mandy given the passive aggressive revenge Mandy got on her. And if that’s the case, it sounds like Lacey Evans will still be available for facing Asuka for the title. For that matter, if the Women’s Wrestlemania Battle Royal is to return, Sonya and Mandy could work together to be the final two, forcing them to fight out their problems. The IIconics call out Sasha Banks & Bayley, as I hoped, but only time will tell if there’s a response. With only three weeks left now, perhaps the IIconics should show up on Raw to go after the champs while they’re busy with Nia Jax & Tamina.

Randy Orton and AJ Styles did great with their promos, and I’m enjoying this new take on WWE original product VS independent grown talent. Orton VS Styles as a match is going to be great, but I would hope Styles wins. But chances are he won’t, there seems to be a lot of moments where Faces could triumph and WWE never likes to let all their heroes win at the same time. The tag match around the US title story was great, and it’s a nice surprise that Mysterio wins. Mysterio VS Joe could happen at Mania, or it could happen before. I’m still personally hoping for Joe VS Cena. Plus, Almas will still want after Mysterio so who knows how that affects things.

Becky and Charlotte have a good segment, but they’ve always been good. Kevin & Ali VS Rowan & Bryan was another good tag match, but Rowan continues to do the heavy-lifting for the champion. The entire Vince McMahon and New Day segment was incredible. I get people are upset this is just a new Daniel Bryan VS Authority thing, but they need to get over it. Tropes are a thing, enjoy the ride. Kofi has quite the gauntlet ahead of him, but I’m thinking there’s a good chance one of the opponents is softened up by their story counterparts. Orton has Styles, and there’s a chance Kevin or Ali goes after Rowan. Either way, I would think Kofi finds a way to win and force Vince’s hand. This just has to lead to Kofi finally getting his world title and Grand Slam at Mania.

My Score: 8.4/10


Let us know what you think on social media @theCHAIRSHOTcom and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (7/22/19)

Who WON’T be here for #RawReunion?!

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WWE Raw Cover image

It’s the first-ever Raw Reunion!

Legends and Hall of Famers are converging on Tampa to once again be part of the longest running TV series for one massive night of thrills! Plus, A Moment of Bliss invites Raw Women’s Champion, Becky Lynch, to be on the show! What goes down when the Man comes around?

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • The Usos w/ Rikishi VS The Revival w/ D-Von Dudley; The Usos win.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship: R-Truth w/ Carmella VS Drake Maverick w/ Renee Michelle; Maverick wins and becomes the new WWE 24/7 Champion.
  • Drew McIntyre VS Cedric Alexander; No Contest.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship: Drake Maverick VS The Boogeyman VS Pat Patterson; Patterson wins and becomes the new WWE 24/7 Champion.
  • The Viking Raiders VS Curt Hawkins & Zack Ryder; The Viking Raiders win.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship Off Camera Match: Pat Patterson VS Gerald Briscoe; Briscoe wins and becomes the new WWE 24/7 Champion.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship On Camera Intergender Match: Gerald Briscoe VS Kelly Kelly; Kelly wins and becomes the new WWE 24/7 Champion.
  • Samoa Joe VS Roman Reigns; Reigns wins.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship: Kelly Kelly VS Candice Michelle w/ Naomi; wins and becomes the new WWE 24/7 Champion.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship: Candice Michelle VS Madusa/Alundra Blayze; Blayze/Madusa wins and becomes the new WWE 24/7 Champion.
  • Sami Zayn VS Rey Mysterio; Mysterio wins.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship Intergender “Match”: Alundra Blayze VS Ted DiBiase; DiBiase “wins” and becomes the new WWE 24/7 Champion.
  • Seth Rollins VS AJ Styles w/ The Club; Rollins wins, by disqualification.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship Inside a Limousine Match: Ted DiBiase VS Drake Maverick w/ Renee Michelle; Maverick wins and becomes the new WWE 24/7 Champion.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship: Drake Maverick w/ Renee Michelle VS R-Truth w/ Carmella; Truth wins and becomes the new WWE 24/7 Champion.
  • Braun Strowman VS Randy Rowe; Strowman wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

JOHN CENA returns to Raw!

No reunion would be complete without the Franchise Player! And as always, fans sing a chorus of “John Cena Sucks~!” as he hits the ring! Cena picks up the mic and fans chant his name. “Wait, wait, wait.” All he had to do was wait for Raw Reunion and he’d be liked? Well then it’s great to be here! There will be other legends, like Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair, Degeneration X, and Stone Cold Steve Austin! So just like us, Cena did not want to miss tonight. Because this is his home. And not just because he lives in Florida now. The WWE has always been his home. He may not be around like he used to, but the WWE Universe is still his family, because he is just as excited to be here now as he was on day one.

“So without further ado,” let’s get this going! And the Usos are first out! “Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whhhoa…!” They get in the ring with Cena for one big “WHOA!” Uce, Day One? Cena can’t be seen but he’s in the building! And to make this reunion even more lit is what the people want. Cena and the Usos dropping bars! Fans want to see and hear that! Cena says he can’t, he hasn’t done that in a long time. But the fans came for the Doctor of Thuganomics! Who this? This is Cena, who left for the movie biz. Cena says that respect for calling him out, but he ain’t getting bested. These two look just like their mug shots! How was it getting arrested? Well shout out to Hillsborough. But this is who they wanted!

Now everyone on your feet, let them hear you make some noise! Because this was fun, but you can’t see me. No don’t go, Pops is here. Here comes RIKISHI~! Yes, the first hall of famer of the night is here! Jimmy and Jey help Rikishi into the ring as he sports some Samoan Dynasty gear. Rikishi won’t let Cena leave yet, thought. Back dat ass up and turn back around. Now it goes like this. With respect, Cena is the man. But tonight, Uce, he can’t let Cena leave fast and furious without busting some moves! “Y’all ready for this?” The Usos and Cena line up, but the Revival interrupt! The Raw Tag Team Champions ruin the fun already. But wait, they’ve brought D-Von! It looks like we’ve got something brewing between tag team icons!

 

Hogan and Jimmy Hart are backstage!

The Hulkster is too pumped to be calm. With so many legends and icons running around, will they and Hulkamania run wild on you?

 

Booker T joins commentary!

Raw returns as the five-time WCW World Heavyweight Champion joins Michael Cole, Corey Graves and Renee Young at the announce desk!

 

The Usos w/ Rikishi VS The Revival w/ D-Von Dudley!

Jimmy and Scott Dawson start and tie up with the legends ringside. Dawson headlocks but Jimmy powers out. Dawson runs Jimmy over but things speed up. Jimmy hurdles then back drops Dawson, then back drops Dash Wilder as he runs in. He puts Dawson in the corner and tags in Jey. Jimmy holds Dawson still for Jey to hit a flying forearm! Jey snapmares Dawson then covers, TWO! Jey keeps on Dawson with a headlock but Dawson powers out. Dash distracts but gets an uppercut, Dawson hangs Jey up with a flapjack hotshot! Dawson backs off a moment to tag Dash, then The Revival double catapult guillotine Jey into ropes! Cover, TWO!

Rikishi coaches his sons up but Dash has Jey on the ropes again. Dash drags Jey up and bumps him off buckles. Tag to Dawson and Dash feeds Jey to the knee. Dawson taunts Daddy Rikishi as he drops an elbow, leg and headbutt! Then a big back suplex! Dawson picks up the Uso bandanna to mock them, then throws it at Rikishi. Tag to Dash and The Revival mug Jey in their corner. They give Jey CHOPS then drive in elbows. Jey uppercuts back hard, but Dash stays on him. Jey elbows Dash away then climbs up, but Dawson distracts. Dash shoves Jey down to barriers! The Usos regroup while we go picture in picture.

Dash tells Jimmy to back off and waits for the count. Jimmy and Rikishi coach Jey up and Jey gets in at 9! Only for Dash to rain down right hands! Dash throws Jey into the post then tags in Dawson. The Revival give Jey the boosted suplex! Cover, TWO! Dawson stays on Jey as Raw returns to single picture. Fans rally up for the Usos and Jey fights back! Jey throws uppercuts but Dawson shoves to elbow Jey down. Tag to Dash and The Revival stomp Jey down. Dash snapmares Jey to wrap on a chinlock. Dash grinds Jey down in front of Rikishi, but Jey endures. Jey fights his way up and throws body shots. Dash shoves Jey but gets a kick for it! Tag to Dawson, but he misses in the corner! Dawson hits the post and falls! Hot tags to Dash and Jimmy!

Jimmy rallies on The Revival with big uppercuts! Mule kick to a pop-lock dab uppercut! Dash runs but into a Samoan Drop! Jimmy fires up and runs corner to corner but Dash puts him on the apron. Jimmy kicks back then climbs up! Dash scrambles but Dawson gets the crossbody! Dash gets the roll-up, TWO! Jimmy kicks, it’s blocked, but into the Dragon Whip! Jimmy fires up again and takes aim, shout out to Umaga with the running hip attack! He climbs, but Dash gets under. Dawson tags in, another block, but a save from the Dragon Whip! Flying uppercut German Supelx! Bridge, but Jey breaks it! D-Von cant’ believe it! Dash hits Jey but gets clothesline’d out with him!

D-Von smirks as he looms closer, but Rikishi is there to keep him back. Dawson jaws at Rikishi about not touching D-Von, but he turns around into a SUPERKICK! Tag to Jey and Jey climbs up, SUPERKICK for Dash! USO SPLASH for Dawson! Cover, the Usos win!

Winners: The Usos, Jey pinning

And now they’ve got a pin on the Raw Tag Team Champions! Will they keep things rolling towards an eighth tag title reign?

 

Alicia Fox is backstage talking Summerslam!

Dana Brooke hears her out about designing a new hat for the occasion. Alicia wants one that goes higher and higher, like 12 feet, maybe 17, maybe 30. What do they think? Kaitlyn is there to give her opinion. Whatever it is, it’ll be amazing. Well have this one then. Alicia’s getting an even bigger hat anyway so… OMG Torrie Wilson returns, too! And she looks amazing! Alicia looks great, too, like a disco ball! Santino Marella returns, too! How is Santina? Fantastic! But she is a little under the weather. But what about his little friend? Huh? Oh right, the Cobra! He loves the ladies. But then Drew McIntyre walks in… These three are “legends”? It disappoints him. But the Scottish Terminator has a different target: Cedric Alexander!

 

Backstage interview with R-Truth and Carmella!

The WWE 24/7 Champion returns from San Diego Comic-Con, and he’s looking out for all possible challengers. But speaking of that SDCC visit, Truth almost got caught up in a storm as he faced The Hurricane! Truth should’ve been a different bird. Like Big Bird or Larry Byrd. Larry’s got some moves. But here coems Renee Michelle, wife of Drake Maverick. She says Truth ruined her wedding, her marriage, and her husband’s life. Carmella and Renee start arguing, but Maverick rolls Truth up!!

Winner: Drake Maverick, by pinfall; NEW WWE 24/7 Champion

The Mavericks work together and get away with the gold! The chase is on again, and Charly Caruso is speechless. That is, until the Godfather walks in! Does she know what time it is? It’s time to ride… the HO TRAIN~!

 

Drew McIntyre VS Cedric Alexander!

The Scottish Terminator was already angry with the former Cruiserweight Champion when he tricked everyone into thinking he was Gary “The Goat,” but now he’s even angrier after having lost to Alexander 1v1! What will McIntyre do to crush the Age of Alexander once and for all?

Neither man waits for the bell, and they start brawling at the ramp! McIntyre BOOTS Alexander down, then drags him up to shove him at the steps. Alexander dodges to send McIntyre into the post! Then Alexander walks up the steps to kick McIntyre back! Alexander moonsaults, and wipes McIntyre out! Alexander rains down rights but McIntyre shoves him into the post, spine first! McIntyre rains down rights now, making sure Alexander sees the last one. The referee says they need to stop and get int he ring, but McIntyre RAMS Alexander into the barriers. Then inverted Alabama, but not on the floor. McIntyre swings Alexander AT THE APRON!! Alexander falls in a heap and McIntyre looms over him. Alexander may have won once, but has he just lost the war?

 

Drake Maverick makes it to the Raw locker rooms.

He quickly gathers his things, but then there’s WORMS!! Yes, it’s the Boogeyman! And he’s coming to get you! Maverick quivers in fear as Boogeyman draws near. Maverick runs, but falls over hard. Pat Patterson walks in and sees “garbage” on the ground. He stomps Maverick, and then has a ref count his pin! Patterson wins!!

Winner: Pat Patterson, by pinfall; NEW WWE 24/7 Champion

Pretty Boy Pat Patterson takes the title from Maverick and leaves him behind. A legend now holds the gold, but will he make it to the end of Raw Reunion as champion?

 

Christian returns to Raw!

Captain Charisma joins commentary but there’s also Lilian Garcia back as the ring announcer for this next match!

 

The Viking Raiders VS Curt Hawkins & Zack Ryder!

Erik and Ivar look to destroy all who oppose them! That includes the #MajorBros! Who survives this #VikingExperience?

The bell rings and the Major Bros go right at the Vikings! Ivar shoves Hawkins away but Ryder puts Erik in a corner. Ryder and Hawkins then both dropkick Ivar out! Erik throws Hawkins out but Ryder throws forearms. Erik knees but Ryder bounces Erik off the mat. Tag to Hawkins, and the Major Bros combine for the STO Russian Leg Sweep. Cover, TWO! Hawkins tags Ryder and they mug Erik with knees and forearms. Erik hits back with a BIG right! Tag to Ivar, and Erik feeds Ryder to a seated senton! Cover, TWO! Ivar drags Ryder up to snapmare and club him with forearms. Tag to Erik, and Ivar scoop slams Ryder for Erik to then scoop slam Ivar onto Ryder! Cover, TWO!

Erik drags Ryder up and tags Ivar in. The Vikings mug Ryder but Ryder escapes, tag to Hawkins! But Ivar cartwheels to dodge and he clotheslines Hawkins down! He throws Ryder into Erik’s knees! Ivar hits Hawkins with a corner splash, then becomes a human weapon again for the corner hip attack! The Vikings roar, and Ivar runs to DIVE onto both Major Bros! Ivar puts Hawkins back in, tags Erik, and they hit Hawkins with THOR’S HAMMER! Cover, The Viking Raiders win!

Winners: The Viking Raiders, Erik pinning

The warpath Erik and Ivar are carving has run through the former #Edgeheads. How long will it be until the Vikings come for the gold?

 

It’s a Raw Reunion mixer backstage!

All the stars talk, and Mike Kanellis is having fun, but then Maria comes in. He was just talking to Eve! As a fellow mom, she was willing to give tips. And everyone knows Eric Bischoff. Maybe they can come to SmackDown if Raw doesn’t work out. Maria reminds Mike he was supposed to be helping her with her belly lotion so she won’t get stretch marks. Does he want her to get stretch marks?! What would happen to her modeling career? Who would provide for the family then?! Not him! Maria is the breadwinner! She storms off and Mike feels humiliated. Ron Simmons appears and sums it up using Jimmy Hart’s megaphone: “DAMN!”

 

The Club talks about the celebration tonight.

But no, not Raw Reunion! AJ Styles means the OC, the Original, Official, Only Club that matters. It is because they run Raw now. Not the legends that show up just because. And certainly not any newcomer trying to overshadow the OC. Well does Luke Gallows mean… Seth Rollins? Styles is ready to beat Rollins. And if he gets up, then the OC makes a statement as the most dominant group in the WWE! Then, now and forever, Too Sweet!

 

Pat Patterson just got beat for the title?!

“You stooge!” Patterson can cry all he wants, but Gerry beat him again!

Winner: Gerald Briscoe; NEW WWE 24/7 Champion

But as he turns the corner, Gerry encounters Kelly Kelly. He celebrates with her, and then she knees him low! Cover, Kelly wins!!

Winner: Kelly Kelly; NEW WWE 24/7 Champion

And she’s the first-ever Women’s WWE 24/7 Champion to boot! Kelly runs off with the belt, but will she make it to the end of the night with it?

 

Samoa Joe heads to the ring.

The Destroyer is in no mood to celebrate and revel in nostalgia after coming so close yet still being so far from the WWE World Championship. Joe takes to the mic to say, “Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Samoa Joe.” And he is here tonight to point out a “vile atrocity” in the WWE! Tonight is to celebrate the Raw Reunion. They’re celebrating the longest running series on television today. And yet, there in lies the problem. They shouldn’t celebrate, because episodes like the Raw Reunion are a plague! Episodes like this, where the fans get to put on rose-tinted glasses and indulge in a “ridiculous addiction to nostalgia.”

Do they not believe Joe? Tonight could’ve had Samoa Joe doing what his best: wrecking superstars left and right, painting in brutality and sculpting in violence. But no, we got Usos and their daddy spitting limericks at John Cena. “It’s embarrassing!” He’s surprised there hasn’t been more pandering tonight! But wait, here comes Roman Reigns! The Big Dog does not want the #Bloodline being disrespected in His Yard. Roman heads to the ring, unafraid of Joe. The two stare down as Roman gets a mic. “If you’ve got something to say about my family, then say it.” Joe makes something clear: he has nothing to say, but he has something to resent! Well then, they’re from the same island, so he knows what happens next. Joe does. But before getting into that, he throws a punch! But Roman is ready for it!

Joe rakes Roman’s eyes to throw him into a post! Roman falls out of the ring but Joe is still on him! Joe whips Roman at barriers! Then he gets in Roman’s face before whipping him to the far side! Roman clutches his hip from the impact while Joe grins and laughs. Joe then grimaces as he drags Roman up again. Joe throws jab after jab then headbutt! Fans rally and duel as Joe puts Roman in the ring. Joe grins as he follows after, and clubs Roman back down to the mat. He stands Roman up for a strong headbutt! They go back outside, and Joe dares Roman to do something about the disrespect. Joe puts Roman back in the ring, but Roman SUPERMAN PUNCHES Joe back down!

Roman watches Joe get back up and dares him to return. Joe considers his options, but grabs a new mic to respond instead. Fans are on Roman’s side as The Big Dog eggs Joe on. “You want to do this, Uce?!” Joe shouts. Want to do this the right way?! You think the fans want this tonight?! Tampa confirms they do. Well Joe’s not doing “a damn thing” the fans want. Roman apologizes to the fans. “Not all Samoans are cowards.” Joe retaliates by saying one is gonna get put out tonight! If Roman wants this, and he does, then he’s got it! The raging Samoans are about to battle, when Raw returns!

 

Samoa Joe VS Roman Reigns!

Raw returns as the bell rings, and the two start throwing hands! Roman rocks Joe to a corner to throw even more haymakers! He lets up to whip Joe corner to corner. Joe dodges and Roman hits the post again! Joe CHOPS Roman, then headbutts that bad arm. He clubs away on the shoulder and Roman falls, so Joe just stomps him. The ref backs Joe off for Roman to get up. Joe is on Roman again with big forearms. Roman shakes out the cobwebs but Joe is on him with a snapmare. Fans duel as Joe puts on a deep neck wrench! Roman endures to torque and fights his way up. Roman pries free and pulls on Joe’s fingers, to then throw forearms. But Roman runs into Joe’s back elbow! Cover, TWO!

Joe seethes as he looms over Roman. He drags Roman up again and drives elbows in. Joe clamps onto the arm and chinbars for the neck wrench. Roman endures and fans rally up again. Roman elbows Joe off, then headbutts him. But Joe yanks Roman hard into ropes and out of the ring! Roman lands on his feet, but Joe DIVES to barrel him over! Joe grins as he looms over Roman again. The ring count begins and Joe takes his time to bring Roman up again. He puts Roman in at 6 then gets in at 7. Joe stalks Roman while mockingly applauding. He stands Roman up to uppercut and CHOP. Joe throws forearms and throws Roman back out of the ring. Joe runs again, but Roman gets clear! Drive-By Dropkick outta nowhere!

Roman drags Joe up and into the ring and runs to leaping lariat! Joe is in a corner and Roman fires off the point-blank clotheslines! Roman runs and boots Joe down! Roman goes to a corner to lock ‘n’ load! He takes aim, runs out, but Joe catches him to an atomic drop! Joe BOOTS Roman, to then drop a senton! Cover, TWO! Joe grows frustrated, but he drags Roman up for the sleeper hold! Roman resists the rest of the Coquina Clutch and dumps Joe out hard. Now Roman runs as Joe gets in, SPEAR! Cover, Roman wins!

Winner: Roman Reigns, by pinfall

And the Big Dog defends his family’s honor! Will Samoa Joe think twice before disrespecting the Dynasty?

 

Raw presents: Miz TV!

The Hollywood A-Lister moves on from letting the Show-Off rile him up, to have The Architect as his special guest!

Raw returns as Miz gives the Most Must-See WWE Talk Show its introduction. Miz also notes that his guest will face AJ Styles tonight, see a Miz & Mrs. sneak-peek later tonight, and then also challenge THE Brock Lesnar for the WWE Universal Championship again! It is SETH ROLLINS! The Beastslayer did it once, and he’ll #BurnItDown again if he has to! Rollins walks out to the ring still hot after his Cross-Brand Top Ten All Star Battle Royal victory and with his ticket punched for Toronto. He sits with Miz in the ring and Miz talks about the roller coaster week Rollins had.

Losing the title at Extreme Rules (which we see footage of now), winning the battle royal (which commentary plugged during Rollins’ entrance), and yet Rollins is laughing? The biggest of Rollins’ life is a “predicament.” Yeah, it’s “BRRROCK~, LESNARRR~!” Lesnar’s big bucket head and little beady eyes, “a real Godzilla looking bastard.” Who wouldn’t fear that? Who wouldn’t want that strength and size? Rollins doesn’t. Rollins doesn’t want to be Lesnar. Lesnar is the Seth Rollins wannabe. But before Rollins can explain, here comes Paul Heyman on the titantron. Everyone knows the introduction, but Heyman says he’s the “dose of reality.” Look in the mirror and say who wants to be what, because Lesnar is the reigning, defending, undisputed Universal Champion!

Rollins’ can’t go whining about the Money in the Bank contract and Lesnar just did it back. Yeah but it took four years to do it, because Lesnar is a Rollins wannabe. Heyman comes out on stage to say “this is the very last time-” No, THIS is the last time Rollins is saying this: if Heyman is going to talk the talk for Lesnar, then he’ll walk the walk for Lesnar. Rollins is going to stomp Heyman through the stage! Heyman wants Rollins to be reasonable, he’s only the Advocate. Time’s up! Rollins steps out but Heyman runs away. Rollins grins and says that for 20 years, Heyman has billed Lesnar as “The Beast.” Lesnar’s no beast. Lesnar is a man. Any man can lose. And at Summerslam, Rollins faces Lesnar once again, and Lesnar will lose.

But let’s go to tonight! Rollins isn’t getting ready by resting, because he’s not Lesnar. He gets ready by facing the best of the best! That’s why he’s going 1v1 with the Phenomenal AJ Styles! And Tampa, let’s #IgnitetheFire and #BurnItDown! Rollins is all fired up, but will he be the one burned by Styles and The Club?

 

Backstage interview with the party guests!

But Sami Zayn stops Charly right there. This is what’s wrong with Raw: wasting time getting opinions of supposed legends. They aren’t legends, they’re just people who were there. It’s like looking back at the Attitude Era through the FaceApp. Just so many desperate people, and so many pathetic fans. What everyone should be hearing is, “Go home!” Don’t come back for Wrestlemania, just go home and stay home. But then Rey Mysterio comes in telling Sami to respect those who paved the way. Oh well sorry Rey, Sami doesn’t respect any of them. And speaking of paving the way, Sami would love to run Mysterio over right now.

But Kurt Angle is here! And he keeps the peace. When Angle was in charge, they used to settle things in the ring. Mysterio’s up for that, and it seems Sami has no choice. Will Sami regret showing no respect to the King of Lucha Libre?

 

Raw returns to Kelly Kelly celebrating with other women legends!

Kelly shows the WWE 24/7 Championship off to Candice Michelle, Melina and Naomi. Melina and Naomi were just talking about her new license. What license? Her refereeing license!! Candice turns on Kelly with big knees and elbows! Cover, Melina counts it, Candice wins!!

Winner: Candice Michelle, by pinfall; NEW WWE 24/7 Champion

And now we have our second Women’s 24/7 Champion! Candice does her dance from back in the day, but then someone reels her in! It’s Madusa, aka Alundra Blayze! And she has Candice in a cobra clutch! Candice taps and Melina calls in, Blayze wins!!

Winner: Alundra Blayze/Madusa, by submission; NEW WWE 24/7 Champion

And now our third ever Women’s 24/7 Champion is crowned! “If any of you have a problem with me being 24/7 Champion, tell it to my face.” Because she doesn’t plan on being champion very long. Oh no, is she going to throw that belt away, too!?

 

Jonathan Coachman returns to Raw commentary!

The Coach knows a thing or two about leaving, returning and being interrupted a lot. But he’s here to watch this next match!

 

Sami Zayn VS Rey Mysterio!

The Critic of the Critics and overall master of obnoxious behavior chose to disrespect the legends on the wrong night. Will Mysterio teach Sami a lesson on respect tonight?

The bell rings and Sami circles with Mysterio. Sami wrenches Mysterio to a wristlock, but Mysterio rolls and uses the ropes to flip. Sami knees Mysterio low then punches him around. He whips but Mysterio kicks back! Mysterio runs but is put on the apron. He shoulders back in then kicks Sami back. Mysterio hops up but Sami trips him up! Mysterio’s in the Tree of Woe and Sami stomps away! Sami backs off, to basement dropkick Mysterio down! Cover, TWO! Sami stalks Mysterio and throws haymakers. He punches Mysterio to another corner, then snapmares him to a seated chinlock. Mysterio endures and fans rally up. Mysterio arm-drags out and then boots Sami back! He runs but Sami pops Mysterio up for a bomb! Cover, TWO!!

Sami grows frustrated but he keeps on Mysterio. He grins as he scoops Mysterio, but Mysterio pops to a tornado DDT! Both men are down but Mysterio is getting up. Sami follows but Mysterio kicks and punches. Sami reverses the whip but Mysterio dodges to wheelbarrow and victory roll Sami to ropes! Mysterio dials it up, but Sami bails out. Mysterio stares Sami down but Sami gives up. But before he can leave, here comes ROB VAN DAM!! The One of a Kind RVD returns to Raw, because he’s still Mr. Monday Nights. But not just him, here comes Sergeant Slaughter! But stand back, there’s a Hurricane coming through! The legends learned what Sami was saying, and they’re making Sami regret it. Because here comes Kurt Angle!

The four legends storm down the ramp but that leaves Sami with only the ring. Mysterio mule kicks, headscissors Sami onto ropes, then hits the 619! Mysterio hops up, shout out to RVD, Frog Splash! Cover, Mysterio wins!

Winner: Rey Mysterio, by pinfall

He did it for the legends! Is this the spark Mysterio needs to get back on track?

 

A limousine arrives at Raw…

With Ric Flair aboard! The Nature Boy is here and fashionably late for the Raw Reunion!

 

The Street Profits are backstage at Raw Reunion!

Well at least Montez Ford is. Where’d Angelo Dawkins go? Ford finds Dawkins coughing and putting eye drops in. What was he up to? Skating with the pilots? Nah, chillin’ with RVD! Oh wow… He and RVD were chillin’ but without Ford? Well it all happened so fast. RVD was like, “You you trying to roll up in here?” And Dawkins was like, yo! Mike Henry, too. And Kelly Kelly, and Ric Flair “WOO~!” WOO? WOO~! Yeah but then Boogeyman showed up. Really? Yeah. Someone’s phone is blowing up. It’s Dawkins. He takes it. Godfather calling! Ford missed a lot..

 

Alundra Blayze walks on stage!

She goes to commentary, and told us all she wasn’t going to be champion for long. Because to recreate her most infamous moment, she has a trash can! She takes the 24/7 Championship belt, but wait! It’s Ted DiBiase! The Million Dollar Man returns to Raw, too! Because he has an offer to make Blayze. He’ll buy the title off her. Because everybody’s got a price! He brings out a fat stack of Benjamin Franklins, and she takes that to hand the title over.

Winner: Ted DiBiase, by payday; NEW WWE 24/7 Champion

Wait does that title work like that?! Doesn’t matter now, because DiBiase heads out with his new piece of gold.

 

Jerry “The King” Lawler returns to Raw commentary!

It wouldn’t be a Raw Reunion without one of the biggest names on commentary! And for such a phenomenal match up next!

 

Seth Rollins VS AJ Styles w/ The Club!

The Architect is preparing for the WWE Universal Champion, but how will he do against the Phenomenal WWE United States Champion?

The bell rings and Rollins circles with Styles. Fans duel as Rollins headlocks. Styles tries to power out but Rollins holds on tight. Styles tries again and gets free, only for Rollins to run him over. Rollins scrambles after Styles as he scrambles to the ropes. The ropebreak makes Rollins back away, so he waits for Styles to return. Styles returns, to kick and club Rollins down! Styles drags Rollins up and bumps him off buckles. Rollins staggers away but Styles CHOPS! Rollins CHOPS back, so Styles CHOPS again. But Rollins starts CHOPPING more, only to run into a fireman’s carry! He sunset flips through, TWO! Styles throws hands but Rollins counter punches and CHOPS! Rollins whips but Styles reverses, only for Rollins to reverse and ROCK Styles with that right!

Rollins runs in for a corner clothesline, then a mudhole stomp! Styles sits down but Rollins backs off, to come back again. Styles puts Rollins on the apron but gets a hotshot for it! Rollins aims but Karl Anderson distracts. Styles pounces with forearms! Rollins goes down and the OC grin. Styles goes out to fetch Rollins, the Good Brothers behind him, but here comes DX!! Triple H and Shawn Michaels won’t let the Club think they’re the best faction in WWE just yet. HBK and HHH watch Rollins’ back now while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Rollins brawls fast and furious with Styles! Styles hotshots Rollins down but DX coaches him up. Rollins gets up but Styles back suplexes. Rollins lands on his feet, runs and slingblades Styles down! Styles runs but into a boot! Rollins hops up and leaps for the blockbuster! Rollins keeps moving, going to a corner. He springboards back in, flying knee! Mule kick hits hard! Fans echo “Burn It Down!” as Rollins stomps and mule kicks again. But the OC trip Rollins up and attack!

Winner: Seth Rollins, by disqualification

But DX stands with the Architect! HHH and HBK help Rollins up while Gallows and Anderson help Styles. Styles wants everyone to just hold on a moment. He says DX is like them, and they’re just like DX. They put up the Too Sweet! DX looks at Rollins, then at the OC. HHH and HBK put up the Too Sweet, but then say “SUCK IT!” Rollins attacks Styles while DX brawls with the Good Brothers! HBK throws Anderson out, then helps HHH clothesline Gallows out! The OC regroups and are furious, so they grab some chairs! Rollins and DX see the OC surround them, but you didn’t know~? Here come reinforcements!

The D O Double G, with X P A C 1 2 3. Then the Bad Guy, Scott Hall, and he ain’t alone because here’s Big Daddy Diesel, Kevin Nash! And looking at the math, with Chyna’s spirit, that’s seven. Wait Billy is here in spirit technically. Well point being, OC, you’re looking at some OG’s! DX and the Kliq, you better get to stepping, and make it quick. Styles and his boys back off as the combined forces of DX and the Kliq take the ring. Styles vows to show everyone something, especially HBK! Dogg asks who wants to say it. Rollins shall do the honors. Rollins takes the mic and starts to feel the pressure. “OC, if you’re not down with that, we’ve got two words for ya!” SUCK IT!! Now that’s Too Sweet!

 

Mark Henry talks with Mick Foley.

They’re both here, but it’s Mrs. Foley’s Baby Boy who plans to head to the ring in a moment!

 

Ted DiBiase laughs as he has the 24/7 Championship.

But as he enters his limousine, he’s under attack! And when the doors open back up… Drake Maverick has the title!

Winner: Drake Maverick, by pinfall(?); NEW WWE 24/7 Champion

He’s back on top, baby! Now Mr. & Mrs. Maverick can… RUN!! The every-day Raw superstars run at Drake and he has to run away! Will Maverick ever catch a break?

 

Mick Foley is in the ring!

The hardcore legend and WWE Hall of Famer is happy to celebrate Raw Reunion in Tampa, Florida. Foley was here two months ago introducing the WWE 24/7 Championship, and oh hey, it’s coming this way! “Come to papa!” But Maverick avoids Foley, and the rest of the Raw superstars run past to keep up the chase. Foley’s not through with that title yet! But have a nice day, guys. Foley vows to be champion before the night is through.

Foley says some of the finest moments of his life have been on Raw. He thanks the fans for being part of it all. But to pick his absolute favorite, it’d have to be… January 4th, 1999! The night Foley became world champion! But wait, what happened to the footage? Oh no, the lights are going down…! THE FIEND IS HERE!! And he attacks Mick Foley with a MANDIBLE CLAW!? He’s stealing Foley’s move, and perhaps stealing Foley’s soul!! Foley passes out and the Fiend disappears into the night, laughing all the way.

 

Raw presents: A Moment of Bliss!

The Goddess and Nikki Cross walk out and take their seats, and take a moment to say what we just saw happen, we need this. Alexa introduces herself and Nikki. The show must go on, so they introduce The Man, Becky Lynch! The Raw Women’s Champion makes her entrance now, holding her belt up high. Becky takes her seat and Alexa brings up the Summerslam title match against Natalya, who has home field advantage in Toronto. But here comes Natty herself! Well hey, Natty, what’re you doing out here? Well she knows how the game works. If Becky wants to say something, say it to Natty’s face. Alexa loves this tension, and explains with footage what went down.

Natty wanted to face a friend in her home country, but Becky dropped the smiles to say this is all business. “Step up or else I will wipe the floor with you in your home country.” Natty desperately needs this, and Becky knows it. And in return. Natty promised to rip the orange mop of Becky’s head, then pull the horseshoe out of her ass, to beat the hell out of her. In the present, Natty brings up the shared time together in Japan, and their parallels in the WWE. Yet for Becky to be so disrespectful blows Natty’s mind. Because Natty undercut Becky before Becky even got her footing. But Becky beat Natty’s little friend, Ronda Rousey. The belt represents the Baddest Woman’s scalp, and Becky will still have it after she embarrasses Natty. Now they brawl!

Referees rush out to stop this scrap, but Alexa and Nikki just watch while sipping coffee. Tampa wants to “Let Them Fight!” but Becky and Natty are being pulled apart. What goes down when these two don’t have to hold back at Summerslam?

 

Raw returns with a backstage interview with Natalya.

Did she expect things to get so personal so quickly? It was Becky who made it personal! Becky is rewriting history, thinking she built the Women’s (R)Evolution, when it was built off of women like Natty! Natty will teach Becky the lesson of a lifetime by taking that belt, man.

 

Drake Maverick and Renee Michelle hurry to their limousine.

But Truth and Carmella strike! Carmella kicks Renee and Maverick apart, then Truth completes the roll-up! Truth wins!!

Winner: R-Truth, by pinfall; NEW WWE 24/7 Champion

And we come full circle! Truth hops in the limo and says go! But Renee is in there, too!! Maverick’s baby, and his wife, both left without him! Carmella also feels left behind. Oh now Maverick notices Renee Michelle was in the limo?

 

Braun Strowman VS Randy Rowe!

The Monster Among Men grabs a mic before the bell rings. He says, “Don’t blink, this ain’t gonna last long.” The bell rings, and he TOSSES Rowe across the ring! Then back the other way! Rowe wobbles about, and Strowman runs to BOOT him down! But that’s not all, because he hauls Rowe up by one hand, to SKYSCRAPER CHOKE SLAM him! Cover, Strowman wins!

Winner: Braun Strowman, by pinfall

Well it wasn’t quite as fast as he said, but Strowman still makes quick work of a mere mortal. Will Strowman make sure everyone on Raw #GetsTheseHands?

 

It’s time to toast the Raw Reunion!

And first out, it’s the Nature Boy! Ric Flair styles and profiles his way out stage as fans echo “WOO~!” And following behind, it’s The Hurricane, DX, The Kliq, Rikishi, and all the returning icons and legends we’ve seen tonight. And last but not least, THE IMMORTAL Hulk Hogan! Hogan and Flair bow to each other in respect, then hug it out. “Well let me tell you something, brother!” It is great to be back and celebrate Raw with all his friends and Hulkamaniacs. And sorry Foley, this is his hometown, brother! Some of the best moments were on Raw with the Tampa Hulkamaniacs. But for all those that sported the red and yellow, Hogan thanks them a million times over. So there’s one last thing to ask: “Whatcha gonna do when the Raw Reunion and Hulkamania runs wild on you?!”

The music plays again and Flair even joins Hogan in on hearing the fans cheer. Everyone applauds, but then the glass breaks!! It’s STONE COLD! STONE COLD! STONE COLD! Steve Austin is here!! And he hits the ring as fans cheer! The Texas Rattlesnake makes sure to hit every corner before he gets himself one of those Stone Cold coolers! He has someone toss him those #Steveweisers, though, and does his double can salute! Broken Skull IPA goes down smooth for Austin, but he gets himself a mic while he’s at it. “Gimme a hell yeah!” “Hell Yeah!” No no, give him a hell yeah. “Hell Yeah!” Can you to hear him? Give him a hell yeah! “HELL YEAH!” There it is.

Austin remembers being on the road with his brothers and sisters, but don’t go thinking he won’t get sentimental. He’d rather just take everyone else by their necks, and that’s the bottom line. But look at those legends on stage. They’ve had blood, sweat, tears, maybe even crapped themselves. Those legends, these cameramen and ring crew, they’re all family. Even the fans, they’re family! Yes, that includes all oft he WWE Universe around the world. So Austin is thankful to come out and celebrate this reunion. He came out a little early, spent the day with the one and only Hogan for a podcast, drank some beer, and had some sushi. Then just last night, Austin was up all night listening to Flair’s stories while drinking all the beer in the bar.

And after all that, Austin ordered room service. Austin ordered all sorts of food, Austin was like, “No I ain’t going down yet.” He went down a floor, there was a door open, and there was Ron Simmons. They looked at each other, giddy as could be. Austin beat Simmons to the punch with a “DAMN!” They hugged it out for like a minute. They hung out with everyone, because it’s about the family and the dues paid. So without any further ado, let’s all drink a cold one. Austin proposes a toast to “every single sum bish” in the ring. This is a legit sell out, and everyone’s watching because this is Raw. “And that’s all I got to say about that!”

Austin gives a toast to Tampa, to the United States of America, to the entire world, “thank you very much. And that’s the bottom liiine~, because Stone Cold said so!” Everyone raises a can, but hold on, is there still time? One minute left, so Austin and Gerry Briscoe, cheers! They were doing some not so legal things in South Africa, and Austin was nervous about talking. Coach said, “Just go be you.” So there it is. Austin’s here with his friends and family, thankful to everyone, but ain’t giving out Christmas cards. Cheers to Raw! HELL YEAH!

 


 

My Thoughts:

A really fun episode of Raw, even though not much actually happened. It became an amazing WWE 24/7 Championship marathon, though. We can officially say history for that title was made, with legends added to the list of champions, along with crossing over into the Women’s Division. The only real downside to that was Renee Michelle did not get to have the title even though it totally set up for that. But maybe we’ll get a YouTube or Twitter exclusive to have shenanigans between her and R-Truth since we know they’re stuck in the same limo now. I’ll have to keep an eye on those sources… But also, WOW that attack on Mick Foley! Bray Wyatt better start doing his take on Three Faces of Foley, using classic Bray, Muscleman/Kids Show Bray and The Fiend as his personas just like Cactus Jack, Dude Love and Mankind.

We did get a lot of fun stuff that helped progress the title stories, too. Cena opening the show was a great choice, and then having him, the Usos and Rikishi bring out some Thuganomics was fun. Usos VS Revival was great, because those teams are great, but also because Raw used picture in picture! Raw should do that more to avoid the “no wrestling during commercials, 2 out of 3 falls” issues. Another Raw Tag Title match at Summerslam for these two teams, I’m sure we’ll get something really amazing. McIntyre brutalized Alexander, a great move for the Scottish Psychopath. I would love to see Alexander, kayfabe beat up as he might be, to come back with a vengeance to really up his own character. There’s still time to circle back to Undertaker if the rumors are true, but this could do wonders for Alexander either way.

Sami VS Mysterio was obviously filler for the legends to get pops, and so that Mysterio could get a win. I don’t know how much more Mysterio has, though, he keeps coming back from injury. Hopefully someone figures something out so Mysterio’s last run can be memorable. The Viking Raiders and Strowman also did filler squash, but it’s fun to see those guys wreck whoever they’re up against. All three should hopefully be in line for titles after Summerslam, or else they’re just beef to satisfy Vince’s needs. Samoa Joe’s promo was very striking, though, for how it bordered on shoot. It was like Sami’s current Heel gimmick, but better. Raw does need to sort itself out to have better episodes and not rely on an episode just like this to spark things.

Joe’s match with Roman was great, but perhaps Joe could’ve/should’ve won so that we could get this for Summerslam. It could still happen to make up for the rest hold debacle Vince had them do last time, but who knows. Rikishi’s gear saying “Samoan Dynasty” makes me want that to be a thing. I always pictured Roman, Usos, and many other family members from the Anoa’i family tree to form a faction to run things on one or both brands. And now that the Club, aka the OC, is trying to run Raw, there’s a feud right there. Rollins and Heyman have good promos on Miz TV, but obviously Rollins VS Styles was really so DX & Kliq could get a group pop to put OC in their place. Something could still come out of this, what with Styles and HBK looking ready to fight ringside. But for now, it was just a fun filler moment.

The Raw Women’s Championship probably had the best progression of anything tonight. A Moment of Bliss obviously helped bring Becky and Natty near each other, and their promos were pretty good. It is an interesting development for Becky to say Natty was the one to do something first, so the next few weeks could elaborate on that. Becky’s line about the belt being the “scalp” of Ronda, Natty’s friend, was also good. These two are great in the ring so we’re definitely going to get a great match in Toronto. But at the same time, I don’t see it being Natty who takes the title, even with this new fire and with the home field advantage. This could tantamount work into being a retirement match or something for Natty, since it will be in her home country, and she can get a touching “Thank You, Natty” moment from Toronto.

My Score: 8.2/10


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(NOAH) WEEKLY NEWSLETTER VOL.44 ~ 21ST JULY 2019

The Global Junior League is wrapping up, and Marine Day is celebrated by all! Hisame gives the overview on the NOAH course of action!

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The Global Junior League is wrapping up, and Marine Day is celebrated by all! Hisame gives the overview on the NOAH course of action!

CURRENT TOUR RECAP
NOAH started the long trek to the finals (and the GHC Heavyweight Tag match championship) at Korakuen Hall on 15th July on Japan’s “Marine Day” National Holiday. By the 16th they had moved up to Japan’s North to the Shin Yuri Twenty-One Hall, with the dreaded “Demon Staircase from Hell”. 19th July in Morioka, 20th in Akita and the 21st in Aomori.

Kenoh debuted his new ring wear (its all red) and Kongoh got their first win over The Sugiura Army (who all came out wearing the “Company Dog T-shirts”)
Kenoh has vowed to enter the N-1, win it, win the GHC Heavyweight at Sumo Hall, and then return to the provinces with the belt.

Naomichi Marufuji also debuted new ring wear. He said he changed it from red as red was Kongoh’s colors, and he has gone with a black and metallic silver. Black and silver are LIDET’S colors, but Kenoh seems not to have picked up on that yet.

RATELS continued with their periodic squabble (which happens in leagues, and when one of them has a belt which another one challenges for) in a match that one fan termed “speed vs power” with Tadasuke taking on YO-HEY, and defeating him within ten minutes. Elsewhere for RATELS that evening, Daisuke Harada was bloodied by Yoshinari Ogawa, who in turn was bloodied by Harada when he threw him into a table. As YO-HEY said about the match (which he watched on the monitor), that Harada is known for bleeding, but for Ogawa, its very rare.

There was blood everywhere by the end of the match, all over the mat, the mats outside (in pools), and senior Referee Nishinaga’s shirt was smeared with it. Yoshinari Ogawa won with a sneak roll up (see “Rat Boy” in dictionary), and Harada threw one of his famous tantrums and had to be pulled off Ogawa. Ogawa said afterwards that if you think what he did to Harada was bad then he was going to do worse to YO-HEY (who is “not on Harada’s level”). YO-HEY gave a nonsensical confused and rambling promo (please DO NOT GET ME STARTED on it) about hitting Ogawa’s nose on the right side. However, in the event of things, neither bled and it was YO-HEY who took the victory.

The bloodshed resolved nothing between Harada & Ogawa as on the 16th when Harada came out to second RATELS, friction once again rose between them, with a fight breaking out at the end of the match as Harada got into the ring to attack Ogawa.

In the main event at Korakuen when AXIZ clashed with the challengers to their GHC Heavyweight tag titles, Kaito Kiyomiya aimed a missile dropkick to Go Shiozaki’s knee (despite promising that he wouldn’t as he felt that a champion should be “emphatic” at times). Also in the match sparks flew between Chris Ridgeway and Naomichi Marufuji, who had a kick\chop war. After the match they both made the “single match” signal to each other, which is something that fans very much want to see.

After the match (and Go Shiozaki tapping out to Taniguchi), NOAH announced that Shiozaki would be missing time due to a shoulder dislocation. During this time, which was a time of worry for fans and Nakajima, Nakajima came out holding both the tag belts and to AXIZ theme music. Taniguchi made him tap out on the 16th to his modified camel clutch.

Kaito Kiyomiya has now turned 23 (17th July) and fans have started detecting a change of vibe him in, he seemingly has gone from the nice young (slightly naive) boy of 22, to more steely and less sympathetic person. This was seen when talking about Shiozaki’s injury he said something to the effect of, “yeah, we all get injured, and while I sympathize, we are trying to have a title match here”, and in the title match he attacked Shiozaki’s damaged neck and shoulder. In Morioka, he was seen to have slight smirk on his lips (as opposed to his usual worried expression) when he held the belt up to Kenoh at the end of the main event, and Kenoh stalked off.

Go Shiozaki returned to action on the 20th July. He doesn’t seem to have had any further problems, and he says he is fine, but fans think that he is probably a lot worse than he is making it out to be.

The afternoon at Korakuen belonged to the juniors with HAYATA vs Kotaro Suzuki putting on a stellar match, with HAYATA wearing Kotaro Suzuki down by letting him wear himself out. HAYATA wouldn’t quit, he took everything that Suzuki threw at him, and likewise with Suzuki taking everything that HAYATA threw at him. The audience were firmly on the side of HAYATA (as opposed to NOAH’s first born son), and just as Suzuki hit the Tiger Driver, the time ran out.

Hajime Ohara, it must be said, was not in a good way during the closing stages of Global Junior League as the problem with his neck and shoulder flared up again (it had plagued him during Global Tag League 2018 too), so while fans wanted to see him win, it was probably better that he didn’t, especially as he is responsible pretty much for the planning of NOAH’s Kawasaki event. During the match on the 16th, the referee was concerned and asked him if he was fit to continue.

The semi final night of Global Junior League 2019 and the GHC Heavyweight title match came on the 21st July 2019 in the Mutsu Grand Hotel in Aomori. It is a small venue, a hotel, which NOAH created a “big match” atmosphere at.

Takashi Sugiura & NOSAWA Rongai teamed up to take on Minoru Tanaka & Kinya Okada. After the match, which Sugiura naturally won, he said that he wanted Kinya Okada to enter The Sugiura Army. Kinya Okada did (and how could he refuse after being commanded by Takashi Sugiura), and he will have his first match as one of them on the 27th July at Kawasaki when they fight Kongoh. His joining The Sugiura Army is a good move as not only does it mean that he has the chance to be mentored by Takashi Sugiura, it also brings him into conflict with Yoshiki Inamura, who is in Kongoh, and calls him “my rival”.

Global Junior League 2019 came down to HAYATA vs Tadasuke, following their wins over Hajime Ohara & Kotaro Suzuki (HAYATA, who was seconded by YO-HEY) and Tadasuke (who defeated Daisuke Harada earlier in the evening). When they met in the ring later, Tadasuke gave HAYATA the finger.

Daisuke Harada commented, “RATEL’S showdown in the final, I have nothing but jealousy.”

AXIZ defended the GHC Heavyweight tag titles successfully against Kaito Kiyomiya & Shuhei Taniguchi, with Go Shiozaki getting the win with the lariat on Shuhei Taniguchi. They were challenged for the titles by The Return of The Dark Agents (Akitoshi Saito & Masao Inoue).

Title match will take place at NOAH’s anniversary show on the 4th August.

EVENT RECAPS
Korakuen Hall, 15th July 2019 
Post match interviews

Shin Yuri Twenty-One Hall, 16th July 2019
Post match interviews

Morioka Gymnasium, 19th July 2019
Post match interviews

Serion Plaza, 20th July 2019
Post match interviews (AXIZ only)

Mutsu Grand Hotel, Aomori, 21st July 2019

NEWS

Atsushi Aoki memorial

All Japan announced this week that the memorial for Atsushi Aoki will take place on the 11th August at Korakuen Hall. NOAH wrestlers have been announced to be participating in the event (although he was an All Japan wrestler, Aoki was NOAH  born) with Naomichi Marufuji, Takashi Sugiura, Shuhei Taniguchi and Hitoshi Kumano in attendance.

The main event will see Naomichi Marufuji team with Kento Miyahara and Yuma Aoyogi against Shuji Ishikawa, Shuhei Taniguchi and Suwama. Suwama has wanted a singles match with Marufuji since the Tokyo Sports Award in January, and says that he doesn’t care about the other opponents, he wants Marufuji.

In the semi, Jun Akiyama will tag with Takashi Sugiura against Naoya Nomura and Hitoshu Kumano.

 

CURRENT CHAMPIONS

 

TOUR TIDBITS
~ NOAH have released a Sugiura Army “Company Dog” towel, which features both of Takashi Sugiura’s dogs with his little toy poodle at one end and his beloved Shiba Inu at the other, both barking “Yip! Yip!”
~ HAYATA gave Kotaro Suzuki a slight black eye
~ Kenoh has said that HE will enter the N-1, and if LIDET don’t let him, he will go ahead and do it anyway.
~ Yoshiki Inamura turned on Junta Miyawaki when Miyawaki came in to try and help him after the match in Morioka
~ Minoru Tanaka stole Rocky Kawamura’s apples and ate one in the ring, and posted that the other one was for his lunch. When asked how they were by Rocky, he said they were tasty.
~ Kenoh’s latest bout of paranoia is to claim that LIDET turned the microphone down on him during a promo.
~ Naomichi Marufuji scooped up the white and black feathers left in the ring from Kaito Kiyomiya and AXIZ’S jackets, and putting them in the palm of his hand, blew them into the crowd.
~ Mohammed Yone and Atsushi Kotoge did the Disco Fever vs Revolutionary Pose stand off. This hasn’t happened for a while.
~ RATELS went on a wander while in Akita, and came across a fenced off area because Bears were in the forest. YO-HEY joked that it was Hitoshi Kumano (who’s surname means “Bear”, and also incorporates bears into his persona\merchandise), doing a private autograph session. In one picture, in the background, HAYATA had his back to the camera while he stood by some bushes…
~ Minoru Suzuki vs Naomichi Marufuji will be their first match since the Suzuki Gun invasion of NOAH in summer 2016, although the match at TAKAYAMANIA 2 when this takes place, will not be a singles match.
~ Kaito Kiyomiya turned 23 on the 17th July
~ “The Tadasuke Women” were seen again in force at the Shin-Yuri Twenty One Hall. These middle aged to elderly women I believe are family and friends of Mohammed Yone, but they were given the name “The Tadasuke Women” after he played up to them last year. Minoru Tanaka, who sprained his ankle during the match, said that he had been distracted by them, hence the reason for his injury. Tadasuke behaved himself this year.
~ Masao Inoue suffered the usual sneak videos from Naomichi Marufuji on NOAH’s long bus journey (they have a twelve hour trip on the 22nd back to Tokyo), and then Marufuji bought out his new toy, “FaceApp” and made him into a woman (who looked a little like Betty Boop) and an old man. Marufuji also made himself into an old man, and then into woman. A photograph of himself and Takashi Sugiura as old grey men (looking like they where hosts of a daytime or direct to video art series) made Sugiura remark that they should challenge for the tag titles.
~ Referee Ben, who was kneeling at ringside, was knocked over by a dueling Chris Ridgeway and Tadasuke

BROADCASTS
NOAH’s big Kawasaki Kultz event (and the GHC Heavyweight title, plus the final night of Global Junior League 2019) will air on the 2nd August on G+ at 8.30PM JST

NOAH will be broadcast live on Sunday 4th August at 11.30am JST on G+

LINKS
“Devil Form” Taniguchi – Onslaught on Shiozaki’s Weak Point

PICTURE CREDITS: Noah.co.jp, Daisuke Harada, Naomichi Marufuji, Battle Sports


Let us know what you think on social media @theCHAIRSHOTcom and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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