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Mitchell’s WWE Monday Night Raw Results & Report! (4/1/19)

Raw goes all out for the Wrestlemania go-home!

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Raw is NOT joking around on April Fool’s! The Beast! The Animal! The Raw Tag Team titles! And Ronda, Charlotte and Becky MUST work together as a team!

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Eight Woman Tag: Bayley, Sasha Banks, Natalya & Beth Phoenix VS Nia Jax, Tamina & The IIconics; Bayley, Sasha, Natalya & Beth win.
  • Lumberjack Match: Jinder Mahal VS Apollo Crews; Crews wins.
  • Kurt Angle VS Rey Mysterio; No Contest.
  • Raw Tag Team Championships: The Revival VS Aleister Black & Ricochet; The Revival win by count-out, and retain the Raw Tag Team Championships.
  • Six Woman Tag: Ronda Rousey, Becky Lynch & Charlotte Flair VS The Riott Squad; Rousey, Lynch & Flair win, no ejections from the Wrestlemania Winner Takes All Championship Match.
  • Bobby Roode & Chad Gable VS Heavy Machinery; Heavy Machinery wins.
  • 2v1 Handicap Match: Braun Strowman VS ???; Strowman wins.
  • Rey Mysterio VS Baron Corbin; Corbin wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Stephanie McMahon returns and opens Raw!

And apparently, she has big news towards the Raw Women’s Championship Triple Threat. Stephanie stands on stage to a mixed reaction as she talks about having the biggest star back on the show: HER! April Fool’s~! But in all seriousness, for the first time in 35 years, the women will main event! And bigger yet is that it now has the NEW SmackDown Women’s Champion, Charlotte Flair. But it also has Becky Lynch, and BOTH titles will now be on the line! One woman will be THE champion, because Wrestlemania pits three of the greatest in one ring, who put their bodies on line and leave their hearts and souls on the mat. It will be #WinnerTakesAll! The biggest match in Mania history just got bigger! But will the three participants still make it there given tonight’s Six Woman stipulation?

 

Brock Lesnar & Paul Heyman are here!

The Beast and his Advocate are in DC just days away, and are feeling good about it, too. The fans boo while Heyman begins his usual introduction. DC echoes for the reigning, defending, undisputed Universal Heavyweight Champion, BROCK! LESNAR! And this is poetic justice that Stephanie McMahon just said “Winner Takes All”. Because the reality of the Universal Championship, the winner (Brock) will take all. The winner, Brock Lesnar, will take all Seth Rollins has to offer, will take Seth Rollins’ best shot, because Rollins is bringing nothing less. But then what? Lesnar will take everything Rollins has in life. That’s just what Lesnar does to people at Wrestlemania. Lesnar seizes the moment and defines his legacy.

Lesnar took The Undertaker’s Streak! He took the hopes and dreams of Roman Reigns when fans thought The Big Dog would dethrone him. And this year, Lesnar will take Rollins at his word that this could be Rollins’ last match ever. “Ain’t no maybe about it!” That’s not a prediction, that’s a spoiler! Those who watch hockey for the fights, who watch NASCAR for the wrecks, and footballs for the riots, Lesnar will violate Rollins and desecrate Wrestlemania! Then when Lesnar holds that title high above his head again, he will define that life is what you make of it. Lesnar and Heyman will go to dinner and simply discuss what’s next in Lesnar’s career. Heyman will tell Rollins in advance, he’s just an afterthought. But Rollins is here!

The Architect heads right to the ring and right up to Lesnar’s face. Rollins grabs himself a mic and says, “This is the biggest match of my career”, but Lesnar doesn’t realize it’s also his biggest match. Because everything will change. Lesnar won’t be able to just be the big bully he is, because no one will want him here. The locker room doesn’t want him, the fans don’t want him! Fans want Rollins to “Burn It Down!” and “Slay the Beast!” but Rollins can tell Lesnar doesn’t care. Lesnar’s made one hell of a career out of being so big, bad and smart in combat sports. And Rollins winning, that might be improbable, but it’s not impossible. Sunday at Wrestlemania, Rollins will win, will take the title, and “there’s not a damn thing you can do about it.”

But Lesnar laughs and bumps Rollins. Rollins kicks The Beast in the balls! But runs into Lesnar’s German Suplex! Lesnar is still reeling but he is standing. He lifts Rollins but Rollins slips out for ANOTHER low blow! SUPERKICK! Rollins is fired up and so is DC! CURB STOMP!! Rollins holds up the Universal Championship, but will he be holding it at the end of Wrestlemania?

 

Backstage interview with Seth Rollins.

He can’t low blow Lesnar on Sunday, he’ll get disqualified. Well Lesnar deserved it. And Rollins isn’t champion. Yet. But to Charli’s point, will he be champion after Lesnar gets a fair shot at him?

 

Eight Woman Tag: Bayley, Sasha Banks, Natalya & Beth Phoenix VS Nia Jax, Tamina & The IIconics!

The four teams vying for the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships at Wrestlemania now team up to throw down 4v4! Can the Boss & Hug Connection work with The Divas of Doom long enough to defeat Peyton, Billie & The Samoan Dynasty? Or will dysfunction dismantle this match and rob the champs of momentum going into Mania?

Raw returns as the champions make their entrance, followed by their partners! Natalya and Beth Phoenix join Sasha and Bayley, and teams sort out. The Glamazon is making her return so she starts against Peyton. DC is behind her, but then Sasha tags right in? The Boss circles with Peyton and tie up. They go around and Peyton puts Sasha in a corner. Peyton knees low then slaps Sasha around. But Sasha slaps back! Sasha goes acrobatic but almost doesn’t make it for the arm-drag. She recovers and goes again for another arm-drag. Sasha tags Bayley and they crisscross whip and snapmare to double elbow drops. Bayley covers, TWO! Bayley keeps on Peyton with a wrench then tags Sasha. They double whip and assisted dropkick! Peyton tags out to Billie before Sasha can catch her.

Billie swings but into a drop toehold! Sasha drags her up to bump her on buckles. Natty tags in and then drags Billie out for a snap suplex. Cover, TWO, but Natty keeps on Billie by her hair. Tag to Beth and now the Glamazon gets some action! The Divas of Doom double whip and hip toss but Billie lands on her feet! They keep her back by hair and throw her down! Beth covers, TWO! Beth stays between Billie and her corner. She grabs an arm and wrenches Billie for a one-arm suplex! Fans cheer “You Still Got It!” but Peyton saves Billie. The IIconics both rush the Divas of Doom but Bayley and Sasha tackle them down! The champs and the challengers argue while we go to break.

Raw returns and Bayley hits Billie with a sliding lariat! She bumps Billie off buckles then runs in for a back elbow. She goes again for another elbow! But Peyton saves Billie from the knee! Billie catches the boots but gets an elbow. Bayley fights off Peyton but Billie boots her down! Tag to Peyton and she drags Bayley up and in. Peyton rains down rights then covers, TWO! The IIconics argue, but tag in. They double wrench and kick and kick Bayley down. They shout IIconic, and hit the pose! Billie throws Bayley down for a cover, TWO! The IIconics are furious but tag back in. DC rallies for Bayley as she takes a double buckle bump! Peyton toys with Bayley then mocks the fans. Peyton grinds her boot into Bayley then lets up at 4.

Fans continue to rally but now that Peyton wants to tag the Samoan Dynasty, they refuse! Billie tags in and the IIconics mug Bayley. Nia and Tamina let Billie take care of things, but Billie gets thrown out! Billie shouts at the Samoan Dynasty, but then turns into a hotshot! Bayley crawls to her corner, but Beth shoves Sasha away to take the tag! The Glamazon tackles Peyton to a corner! She throws Peyton around then clotheslines her! She hits Billie, too! And boots Nia away! Peyton swings but misses, to run into a powerslam! Fans fire up for Beth, but Tamina dumps her out! Beth glares at Tamina and chases her down! And tackles her THROUGH the barriers!!

DC loses its mind, and even the other superstars do. But Beth is the legal competitor so she has to get to the ring! Peyton fetches her to put her in the ring. Peyton slaps Beth around, but Beth stops her with one hand! And reels her in for the GLAM SLAM! Cover, Beth and team win!

Winners: Bayley, Sasha Banks, Natalya & Beth Phoenix, Phoenix pinning

The Glamazon’s debut is successful in the biggest way possible! She and the Queen of Harts are coming for those titles, does the Boss & Hug Connection stand a chance of keeping them?

 

Batista arrives!

The Animal returns to his hometown of DC, but what will he say this close to Wrestlemania?

 

Batista heads to the ring!

The Animal walks down the ramp to an ovation from his hometown crowd. After how quickly things got personal between him and The Game, this Sunday, Wrestlemania will be No Holds Barred, for Triple H’s career! Batista picks up a mic and has the spotlight on him. He takes his time while fans cheer and say “Welcome Back!” He doesn’t say a word, he just cues a video package. “There is nothing this man hasn’t done in this business! Except beat me.” Batista VS HHH over the years, in all the different match types, in all the ways The Animal bested The Cerebral Assassin. Back in the present, Batista takes off his sunglasses and speaks. “Hunter. Kiss my ass.” Mic drop, glasses back on. The Animal doesn’t need to say anything more, but what will it take to finally end The Game?

 

Ladies and Gentlemen: Elias.

The Drifter is right outside MetLife Stadium ahead of Wrestlemania. There will be no interruptions. Just a full stadium watching Elias. “Oh~ Walk With Elias~!” DC echoes Elias, but Elias says that won’t be while he’s playing. Fans will silence their phones, hold their applause and shut their mouths. Beyonce, Springstein, U2, no one will remember them. They’ll talk about Elias. And they wont’ talk about Rollins, Becky or Kofi, they’ll talk about Elias’ moment. They’ll be talking about when 80 thousand chose to Walk With Elias.

 

Lumberjack Match: Jinder Mahal VS Apollo Crews!

The Modern Day Maharaja and the rising star will both be in the Andre the Giant Battle Royal, but so will all the men surrounding the ring, except perhaps the Singh Brothers. The tensions run high as the bell rings, who gains momentum into the memorial match at Mania?

Mahal attacks Crews right away with big hands! He whips and runs Crews over, but only the Singhs cheer. Mahal drives elbows in then puts on a neck wrench. Crews gets up but Mahal brings him back down. Mahal grinds Crews down with a headlock but fans rally for Crews. Crews gets up but Mahal holds on to drive in more elbows. Even lumberjacks start rallying for Crews as he endures the chinlock. Crews back suplexes Mahal down and frees himself! Mahal stands but Crews mule kicks and bicycle boots. Crews dodges Mahal to then clothesline and kip up! Crews climbs up top and frog splashes! Cover, Crews wins!

Winner: Apollo Crews, by pinfall

The Lumberjacks didn’t even have to lift a finger! Will Crews cruise on into New York to put his name on Andre’s statue?

The B-Team come in and claim they’ll be the ones. The Ascension do, too, and a brawl breaks out! This is just a sample of things to come as The B-Team is tossed out! Titus fights the Ascension now and throws them out. Rhyno helps out, but EC3 throws him out. The Lucha House Party work together on Titus O’Neil while Crews tosses EC3! Titus Worldwide reunites and works together to dump out Lucha House Party! But Mahal returns to throw Titus out! Mahal and the SIngh Brothers want revenge on Crews, but he throws Samir, then Sunil out. Mahal tries but gets an enziguri! Crews sees Sunil is still here, so he trophy lifts him, and throws him onto his brother! Will Crews be the one left at the end? Or will things be very different with Braun Strowman in the ring?

 

Kurt Angle VS Rey Mysterio!

The Olympic Gold Medalist keeps his Farewell Tour going even this close to Wrestlemania! And he’ll face one of his greatest and fastest rivals ever in the King of Lucha Libre! But before the match, Angle picks up a mic to speak.

“This is my last night ever here on Monday Night Raw. And I’d like you to know how appreciative I am for the good times, the bad times.” There have been boos and even cheers, so from the bottom of his heart, Angle wants to thank the fans. Fans thank him back. And now, Raw celebrates Angle’s career with a special video package. From a gold-medal win with a broken freakin’ neck to an instant mega star in pro-wrestling, “he’s something special.” Red, white and blue, the Three I’s, King of the Ring and Grand Slam Champion, multiple Wrestlemanias and more, and even some laughs along the way. But then a second neck injury, a pain killer addiction, and a step away from the WWE, Angle came back to be a Hall of Famer! #ThankYouKurt, “Oh it’s true, it’s damn true.”

Angle is barely holding in the tears as the fans give him an even bigger ovation. But then Baron Corbin comes out to ruin the mood. Corbin has his own mic as he mocks the feel good moment. He doesn’t know who made the video, but it should’ve been in black-and-white, because it’s ancient history. That angle isn’t the one in the ring. The one in the ring struggles to take a jacket off. The one in the ring can barely go a few minutes. This Angle can’t hang with a superstar of today as big, strong, fast and just plain better, like Corbin. But on another note, Corbin is a bit annoyed with these fans here filling social media with “Kurt Angle deserves better!” Fans tell Corbin “Yes He Does!” and “We Want Cena!”

Corbin says this won’t change anything. Forget the old Angle, because the last image of this Angle will be a “broken down old man” down on the mat! Angle says they will have their match on Sunday. But as his last Raw wrestling, how about they have an exhibition sampler? Corbin marches down to the ring, but tells Angle with a big grin, “That’s the old Angle intensity, but where’s the intelligence?” If Corbin goes at him now, Angle won’t make it to Sunday. They’ll just have to wait. But here comes Angle’s scheduled opponent, Rey Mysterio!

Mysterio hits the ring and borrows the mic to tell Corbin, “Aight, we get it. You don’t want to fight Kurt tonight. But someone definitely needs to teach you a lesson in respect.” If it’s okay with Kurt, Mysterio should take Corbin tonight. Corbin doesn’t want to, but then he sucker punches Mysterio! Angle throws hands on Corbin but Corbin standing switches. Mysterio seated sentons Corbin! Angle gets Corbin with an Angle Slam! Corbin is sent running, but will he really ruin Angle’s farewell on Sunday?

 

Backstage interview with Charlotte Flair!

The Queen and NEW SmackDown Women’s Champion now has to put her new title on the line. Is she concerned by that at all? Someone should ask Asuka how she feels about losing this title first. And then at Wrestlemania, everyone will be shocked when Charlotte breaks Becky and taps Ronda out. Stephanie changed the match between Charlotte changed the game. And the winner that takes all will be Charlotte. Then how about tonight’s Six Woman Tag? Can she keep her cool? Does she look worried? Charlotte is professional, not a hot head like Becky or a loose cannon like Ronda. But after they win, those two better stay away or they won’t make it to Mania anyway. The Queen is confident, but is she too confident this close to the Showcase of the Immortals?

 

Raw Tag Team Championships: The Revival VS Aleister Black & Ricochet!

Dash Wilder & Scott Dawson have been on the defensive against this unexpected duo from NXT. Now they’ll have to be extra defensive in defending their tag titles this close to Wrestlemania! Meanwhile, the Embodiment of the End and the King of Flight are already competing for NXT Tag Team Championships at TakeOver: New York this Friday! Will they be going into that match as main roster champs on top of it?

Raw returns as The Revival make their entrance. Introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we begin! Teams sort out and Aleister starts against Dawson. They circle and tie up, and Dawson puts Aleister in a corner. Aleister turns it around then fakes a punch to make Dawson flinch. Aleister backs off and circles with Dawson again. They tie up and Aleister gets a headlock. Dawson reaches but Aleister keeps him from Dash. Dawson knees low and CHOPS hard! He snapmares Aleister and runs him over. Things speed up and Dawson elbows Aleister back. Dawson drags Aleister by his hair and tags in Dash. Dawson feeds Aleister do Dash’s knees, then Dash CHOPS Aleister! Dash throws European Uppercuts, then whips Aleister. Aleister grabs ropes and kicks back. He sweeps the legs and Oklahoma rolls! TWO, but Aleister arm-drags Dash down!

Dash endures the armlock but Aleister brings him over to tag in Ricochet. Ricochet takes the hand-off to a wrench and brings Dash down to the mat. Dash gets up but Ricochet wrenches again. Ricochet throws elbows but Dash knees back. Tag to Dawson and the #TopGuys mug Ricochet with double headbutts. Dawson stomps Ricochet then CHOPS him against ropes! Dawson taunts Aleister but goes back to Ricochet to choke him against the ropes. Dash tags in but Ricochet shoulders him back. Ricochet heads for his corner but Dash keeps him away. Tag to Dawson, but Ricochet dodges the Revival to roll off and DOUBLE huricanrana! Tag to Aleister and the Unexpected Duo goes after Dawson. They speed things up, kitchen sink to basement, then double hip toss Dash onto Dawson! Cover, TWO!

Aleister keeps on Dawson but Dawson puts him on the apron. Aleister fights The Revival off but Dawson hotshots the arm! The Revival get control back while we go to break.

Raw returns and Dash hot tags Dawson! Dawson slides to intercept Aleister into a Northern Lights Suplex! Bridging cover, TWO! Dawson keeps on Aleister with a mounted armlock to a Fujiwara. Aleister endures as Dawson pulls back on the fingers and wrist. Dawson shifts to a hammerlock but Aleister fights his way up. Fans rally as Dawson leans on Aleister, but Aleister elbows back. Dawson suplexes but Aleister slips out. Aleister tries to lift but that bad arm keeps him from doing it. So he sweeps the legs! Dash tags in and drops on Aleister! Aleister still reaches but has to punch Dash away, too. Aleister uses a leg to get free and hot tags Ricochet! The One and Only rallies on Dash then on Dawson! Jumping neckbreaker for Dawson, then he lands out of the suplex to roll Dash! TWO, cradle, TWO!!

Dash swings but misses, and Ricochet dropkicks him into Dawson! Ricochet victory rolls, TWO! Dash narrowly escapes but Ricochet keeps his focus. Ricochet drags Dash and rolls him, but TWO into Dawson’s cheap shot! Dash gets Ricochet in a Gory Special, Gory BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Ricochet lives and The Revival can’t believe it! Fans are loving this, though, as Ricochet crawls. Dash drags Ricochet over but Ricochet is dead weight. “This is Awesome!” as Aleister drags Dawson down! Dash grabs Aleister but Aleister hits back. Aleister fights with them both, but breaks free of the chicken wing to knee trigger Dawson! Dash hits a tornado DDT! Ricochet FLIES over the corner!! Fans lose their minds over such insane athleticism!

But a ten count begins as all four men are down on the outside. Ricochet and Dash hurry at 5 but keep each other from reentering. Dash tackles Ricochet into barriers then hops in at 7. Ricochet stands at 8 but Dawson trips him up! The challengers are counted out, The Revival win!

Winners: The Revival, by count-out; still Raw Tag Team Champions

The #TopGuys used every trick in the book, and it worked out in their favor! But Aleister hits Dash with a BLACK MASS! Ricochet feeds Dawson to a second BLACK MASS! Then Aleister drags Dawson to a drop zone for Ricochet’s 630 Senton! The Unexpected may not have won these tag titles, but will they go on to NXT TakeOver: New York to take those titles?

 

Backstage interview with Ronda Rousey.

The Baddest Woman is in no mood. She’ll destroy the Riott Squad by herself while Charlotte and Becky watch. And it doesn’t matter what stipulations are on the match, Wrestlemania Sunday becomes Judgment Day for The Man and The Queen. Unless they foolishly try to provoke her tonight. Will these combustible elements really keep from exploding this close to the Mania main event?

 

Alexa Bliss talks with Tyler Breeze.

The new hairstyle is amazing, he’s like a cuter Hemsworth. EC3 is there, too, as Alexa props herself up about being the Wrestlemania host. There is so much going on, like the Women’s Triple Threat main event, #Kofimania, and now the celebrity level of Andre the Giant Battle Royal. EC3 laughs over thinking about the SNL Weekend Update. But then Braun Strowman comes by and no one laughs. They tell Strowman it was those guys over there watching Weekend Update. Strowman storms over to the two guys holding a tablet. Strowman will pretend their Michael Che and Colin Jost. Meet him in the ring or he’ll just hunt them down so they can #GetTheseHands.

 

Backstage interview with Roman Reigns.

The Big Dog is recovering from Drew McIntyre’s Claymore kick that rung his bell, as well as a low blow, leading to a Claymore. The Shield did great at Fastlane, but is he okay to make it to Mania? Is Drew the one saying this stuff? Drew doesn’t know Roman. Roman is 100% and- McIntyre attacks!! The Scottish Terminator will not allow Roman to have even a moment of momentum! “You should’ve said no, Roman!” McIntyre throws Roman into trunks! McIntyre wants Roman to be haunted by him up until Wrestlemania! Security gets McIntyre to back off, and Roman drags himself back up. Will Roman get revenge on McIntyre once and for all?

 

Six Woman Tag: Ronda Rousey, Becky Lynch & Charlotte Flair VS The Riott Squad!

Ruby, Liv and Sarah may not even need to do all that much against such a dysfunctional and tense trio. Will the champ, The Man, and the other champ be able to coexist long enough to win?

Raw returns as Charli interviews Becky at gorilla position. The Man cuts to the chase: Sunday, Becky walks out of MetLife the first ever dual women’s champion. And she knows Charlotte runs her giant mouth, but who cares what she has to say? And as for weird little Ronnie, she got her God Complex triggered, and now she’s at her most vulnerable. The McMahons are forcing the three to work together, in hopes Becky loses her cool and gets kicked out of Mania. But she’s wise to the mind-games. She’s gotten this far, hasn’t she? But to insure no one can sink her after Mania is to be THE champion on the Grandest Stage of Them All. Charlotte and Ronnie want to make history, Becky has no choice but to make history. Becky makes her entrance first, followed by Charlotte, and finally Ronda, and we begin.

Teams sort out and Charlotte insists she start, even as fans chant for Becky. Becky and Ronda tensely take to the corner while Ruby starts for the Squad. Ruby and Charlotte circle, and Charlotte kicks Ruby then throws her down by her hair. Charlotte soaks up all the cheers and jeers before standing Ruby up for those Flair CHOPS! Charlotte struts then chokes Ruby on the ropes. Becky tags in! Becky mocks the strut then dares Charlotte to do something. Charlotte backs down but Ruby goes to kick. But Becky blocks and headlocks, only for Ruby to power out. Ruby follows and runs Becky over, then covers. Becky slips out Matrix style then dropkicks Ruby down! Ruby bails out and the Squad regroups. So Becky takes time to mock both champs! Tensions are high while we go to break.

Raw returns and Sarah Logan has Becky down in a cobra clutch. Becky fights her way out but Sarah whips her to a corner. Sarah runs into a boot, then Becky hops up for a flying shoulder! Becky drags herself up and throws Sarah out. Becky heads for open mat but Sarah tags Ruby. Ruby brings Becky up but gets an enziguri. Sarah tags back in to knee Becky right down! The Kentucky Viking roars before putting Becky in an inverted cloverleaf! Fans rally for Becky as she endures. Ronda and Charlotte just watch quietly as Sarah leans on Becky. Becky rolls through but Liv tags in! Liv misses and Becky hits Ruby to then hit Liv! Becky rallies and calf kicks Liv down, then throws Sarah with the Becksploder! Becky mule kicks and tosses Liv! Cover, TWO!

Becky catches her breath while Charlotte and Ronda actually agree on something: they sarcastically think Becky’s doing well. But Becky cradles Liv, TWO! Becky goes for a Disarm-Her but Charlotte tags in! Charlotte tells Becky to move while Becky dares Charlotte to swing. Ronda tags in during the distraction! She and Charlotte talk trash now, but Liv rolls Ronda! Ronda throws Liv off then into the ARMBAR! Liv taps, Ronda and team win!

Winners: Ronday, Charlotte & Becky, Ronda by submission

And now the restrictions are off! Ronda fires off on Charlotte and Becky’s rather “surprised”! Becky jumps in to drag Ronda off Charlotte but Ronda throws hands on her! Charlotte comes back but security rushes in to separate the three! But security just gets beat up instead! Charlotte, Ronda and Becky fight off the men before fighting each other again! Now there’s police in the ring! Ronda, Charlotte and Becky settle down, until Ronda breaks through! Cops cuff Ronda! Fans want to “Let Them Fight!” and Becky obliges! She clobbers a cuffed Ronda while Charlotte simply watches. Becky gets cuffs again!

Fans still love the Straight Fire, even as she and Ronda are dragged away. Charlotte decks Ronda!! Now all three women get cuffs, but Charlotte’s kicking with those long legs! She gets Becky in the mouth! All three are going, but kicking and screaming as they do. They even fight in the parking lot! Charlotte gets her own car, but Ronda and Becky are put in the same one! They start kicking at each other, and a window gets busted!! Then when the officers bring Becky to Charlotte’s car, Charlotte gets out and starts kicking again! Ronda gets in the driver’s seat and crashes one car into the other!! The rage cannot be contained! Becky and Ronda are put in separate cars, with Ronda hanging out the busted window barking at Becky! So Charlotte knees her in the face!

The cars finally drive off, taking Ronda and Becky away while Charlotte waits with the cops. Is Wrestlemania’s historic main event still in trouble? Or can The McMahon family literally bail all three superstars out in time for Sunday?

 

Bobby Roode & Chad Gable VS Heavy Machinery!

The GLORIOUS Duo are just one of many Raw Tag Teams that have had issue with the NXT stars coming in, and look to slow down the momentum of Tucker Knight & Otis Dozovic. Will Roode & Gable be able to stay afloat in the Raw Tag Division? Or will they be compacted by the power of #SteaksAndWeights?

The bell rings and Gable starts against “Dozer”. They circle and Gable gets a headlock. Dozer powers out and runs Gable over! Tag to Tucky, and Heavy Machinery double body shot. They march around and meet in the middle to give Gable a gut sandwich! Tucker slams Gable then again. Gable gets up but Tucker trips him up. Gable manages to throw Tucker! Tag to Roode, and the GLORIOUS Duo work together for a body shot to knee lift combo. Roode clotheslines Tucker down, covers, TWO! Roode keeps on Tucker, but is that Lacey Evans? The Sassy Southern Belle wants to strut her stuff in DC! Roode keeps his focus on Tucker with a chinlock, and chops Tucker in a corner. Roode runs in but into an elbow! Tucker dodges Roode then tags in Dozer!

Dozer rallies on both Roode and Gable! He whips Roode but Roode kicks back. Roode wants the DDT but Dozer powers him to a corner! Dozer squashes Roode with a splash, then decides to pump it up! Fans love seeing the Caterpillar in action! Elbow dropped, cover, but Gable breaks it! Tucker runs in but Gable tackles him out! Gable hurries back and tags in. Roode boots Dozer and the Glorious Duo coordinate, but Dozer shoves Roode out! Dozer catches Gable’s crossbody! Tucker runs in, COMPACTOR! Cover, Heavy Machinery wins!

Winners: Heavy Machinery, Otis Dozovic pinning

Tucker & Otis are steamrolling their way through the Raw Tag Team Division! Will they bulldoze their way to tag titles post-Mania? Is there anything the GLORIOUS Duo can do to get back on top?

 

2v1 Handicap Match: Braun Strowman VS ???

It doesn’t really matter who his opponents are, The Monster Among Men already said he’s going to visualize Michael Che & Colin Jost tonight. Will Strowman destroy these poor souls before seeking to destroy the celebrity correspondents at Wrestlemania?

Raw returns as the lambs have arrived for the slaughter- Er, Strowman’s opponents have made their way to the ring. They’re already cowering with the bell, but Strowman reminds them of their roles before squashing them in the corner! Strowman tosses “Jost” then clotheslines and tosses “Che”! Strowman BOOTS “Jost” then clobbers “Che” again! The Monster throws “Jost” out, then drags up “Che” to throw him out. By the battle royal rules, Strowman would have eliminated them. But since it’s not, Strowman goes out and builds up steam! “Jost” and “Che” stand up, only to get RUN OVER! Fans want “One More Time!” so Strowman keeps going around the ring. Strowman comes back around, to run them over again!

Strowman puts “Che” and “Jost” in the ring, then storms in to sandwich them in a corner! He scoops “Che” for the MONSTER SLAM! And then “Jost” too! But Strowman isn’t done, he drags the two up together for a DOUBLE Monster Slam! Double cover, Strowman wins!

Winner: Braun Strowman, by pinfall

As if there was ever any doubt. Will Strowman have to go through 20 other superstars to get at the real Che and Jost? Will Che and Jost even want to show up?

 

Bobby Lashley and Lio Rush are here!

The Almighty Intercontinental Championship and Man of the Hour head to the ring to address the coming Wrestlemania title defense. What will they have to say to, and about, Finn Balor after the break?

Raw returns and Charli interviews them both. Finn Balor earned his match at Mania by beating Lashley and Jiner Mahal in a 2v1 Handicap match, pinning Mahal. Lashley lashed out against Mahal and the Singh Brothers, but he still has to defend against Finn. Is there any cause that Finn can actually beat Lashley? Lio asks, “Are you kidding me?!” We all just saw what happened: a fluke! Finn didn’t pin Lashley! Come Sunday, Lashley won’t have dead weight like Mahal, and the only concern for them will be where to have the after party. Because it sure ain’t in DC. But what if it’s Demon Balor showing up? Lashley has been fighting for a long time. If you think he’s afraid of a fairy tale, you’re out of your mind. The Demon is just Finn, and Lashley’s beaten Finn every time. But Finn communicates from the titantron!

Finn wants Lashley to be concerned. Finn’s always been the one to have his demons. And his Demon will become Lashley’s nightmare! The Demon himself makes an appearance on screen! Lio looks a little worried. But whether it be man or myth, will the Rocky Mountain Machine stand a chance against a determined Extraordinary Man?

 

Rey Mysterio VS Baron Corbin!

The King of Lucha came to the defense of his friend and rival when the Lone Wolf talked smack then tried to sucker punch Kurt Angle. Now Msyterio looks to make Corbin humble before the Wrestlemania farewell for the gold medalist. Will Mysterio show Corbin up before Angle shuts Corbin up? Or will Corbin shock everyone on the way to New York?

The bell rings as Mysterio and Corbin circle. Corbin corners Mysterio and keeps him from getting away. Mysterio dodges and kicks away on Corbin’s leg! Mysterio throws body shots ten whips but Corbin holds the ropes. Corbin reverses the whip but Mysterio slides under to dropkick a leg out. Corbin shoves Mysterio but Mysterio rocks him with a right! Mysterio runs, slides out, and baits Corbin into some cat ‘n’ mouse. Corbin falls for it and gets dropkick’d back! Kids laugh at Corbin as Mysterio stands tall in the ring. Corbin tells DC to shut up but they just boo and jeer. Corbin rushes Mysterio but Mysterio dodges and slides again, only to get caught! Mysterio fights against the bomb and huricanranas Corbin out hard! Mysterio runs but into a right hand! Corbin grins while catching his breath, and we go to break.

Raw returns once more, and Corbin drags Mysterio up to throw him into barriers! Corbin is fired up but fans boo and jeer. The ref tells Corbin to bring this back into the ring so he puts Mysterio in. Corbin follows and drags Mysterio up again. He puts Mysterio in a corner and hoists him up top. Corbin throws forearms then pulls at the mask! The ref counts so Corbin lets go at 4. Corbin goes back and has Mysterio in a back suplex, but Mysterio lands, only to tweak a knee. Corbin stomps Mysterio to a corner then in the corner. He stomps a mudhole into Mysterio but lets up at 4. Corbin argues with the ref but Mysterio slips out of the ring.

Mysterio hobbles while fixing his mask but Corbin  is in pursuit. Corbin puts Mysterio into more barriers! Corbin mocks the fans while soaking up the heat. The referee tells Corbin to get things back in the ring so Corbin puts Mysterio in. Corbin takes his time returning so he can soak up more of the fans’ jeers and boos. Corbin taunts Mysterio to stand back up. The ref checks on Mysterio, who clutches his leg. Fans tell Corbin he’s “Boring~!” but Mysterio kicks Corbin back! And again! Mysterio stands but Corbin rolls him. Mysterio rolls through to dropkick! He runs but into a flapjack! Corbin throws Mysterio out of the ring, then grins as he soaks up even more heat. Mysterio crawls back towards the ring but Corbin goes out to clobber him! Corbin leaves Mysterio behind as the ring count begins again.

The count passes 5 before Mysterio stands. Corbin drags Mysterio up by his mask! But Mysterio shoulders back! Corbin bumps Mysterio off the post! Mysterio falls to the floor again but Corbin goes back out to fetch him. Corbin puts Mysterio in again but takes his time looming over the lucha legend. He drags Mysterio up again for a scoop but Mysterio slips out to a sleeper hold! Mysterio holds on as a backpack, but Corbin throws him off. Corbin runs in but Mysterio dodges! Mysterio springboards and huricanranas Corbin! He keeps moving and tilt-o-whirl DDT’s Corbin down! Cover, TWO! Mysterio keeps focus while fans rally behind him. He drags Corbin around but Corbin shoves him out. Corbin runs into a shoulder, Mysterio fakes out the haymaker then slingshots to put Corbin on the ropes! Dial it up, 619!!

Mysterio keeps going as he climbs up top! Frog Splash FLOPS! Both men are down but DC cheers for Mysterio. Corbin stands up and walks over to Mysterio. Corbin smirks at the crowd as he drags Mysterio up again. Fans boo as Corbin lifts Mysterio, but Mysterio fights out again! Seated senton, but Mysterio runs into DEEP SIX! High stack, Corbin wins!!

Winner: Baron Corbin, by pinfall

The Lone Wolf defeats a legend! And this might not be the last one! Will Corbin actually defeat Angle in Angle’s final match ever?

But wait! Angle jumps Corbin on the stage! ANKLE LOCK! Corbin’s tapping out but it doesn’t matter, as Angle holds on for much, much longer! Referees pull Angle off Corbin, but he’s humbled Corbin for now. Will Angle keep his legacy alive on the Grandest Stage of Them All?

 


 

My Thoughts:

This was quite the Raw go-home for Wrestlemania. And it was good that they didn’t drag out the news we all expected from Stephanie McMahon: two titles in one match, just put both titles on the match! Naturally this means the winner makes history in this already historic match, and there’s still a good chance it’ll be Becky. And then from dual champion, there will surely come a time when we have the first-ever Undisputed Women’s Champion, or even a WWE Women’s World Champion to signify the reunification of the brands. Either way, what many expected to be just a mess of a Six Woman Tag turned into something really good for this build. At least, in my opinion.

It was a clever choice for someone to take advantage of how the “no infighting” stipulation only lasted for the match, and then it just escalated from there. All three women looked strong, but also opportunistic, in the many scraps that happened, and those kicks were just incredible. Charlotte got the best shot in with Ronda hanging out the window, but it is a bit crazy for all three women to have their arrested Stone Cold moment. Obviously this won’t affect the match, and this helps spice up a build that was starting to fall flat. Triple Threats being inherently No Disqualification, I’m gonna love seeing these three scrap just like tonight, and maybe escalate again with at least kendo sticks and chairs.

Now for those wondering why this segment didn’t close the show, Raw doesn’t have it’s 5 minute overrun time anymore, and I know I would’ve been disappointed if we didn’t get to see everything they planned on TV. Though honestly, there was at least one thing they could’ve cut for the sake of time. I honestly didn’t see the point of the Lumberjack match. It was great for Crews to win because it means WWE is (probably) finally seeing his worth, but they should’ve just waited until Sunday to book Crews strong in the battle royal itself. Besides, we know the battle royal is really for Strowman’s celebrity angle with Che and Jost. Strowman decimating his substitutes for them was fun, but it still doesn’t guarantee something screwy doesn’t screw Strowman out of winning.

I really enjoyed Rollins getting the better of Lesnar here. Of course, it was with low blows, but Rollins had a point of Lesnar deserving it. I just have a bad feeling now that Rollins won’t win, since it feels like forgone conclusions that Becky and Kofi win. I’m basically hoping against hope that somehow, Vince allows us to have all three top title celebratory moments to make up for the shortcomings in the builds. The 8 Woman Tag did great to make the build for the Women’s Tag Team Championship Fatal 4 Way, especially for Beth Phoenix’s own story of her return. This did great for Beth, she is going strong into the title match, but I’m still picturing Bayley & Sasha winning to keep their inaugural reign going.

The filler of Heavy Machinery VS GLORIOUS Duo was okay. I almost thought this was gonna be break-up time for Roode & Gable, but there’s so few good tag teams on Raw as it is, they can’t afford to lose one yet. The tag title match was great, and the count-out victory was actually a good call. The Revival retain but not in the strongest way, since Aleister & Ricochet still need to look good going into TakeOver. I still can’t say if Aleister & Ricochet come away with those titles, but now that they don’t have main roster titles, it could happen. And classic Vince Logic: Finn won’t bring the Demon out for The Beast, but he will for Lashley. This has to mean more than anything that Finn wins the title back, and takes on some fresh competition post-Mania.

But the one thing I’m disappointed about is we didn’t get Angle VS Mysterio, but perhaps Corbin was right that Angle would’ve looked tired and old in that match. Mysterio VS Corbin was a good substitute, and I did not expect Corbin to win. Though I’m not sure who did. Corbin did need to stay strong against Angle, and a win did that. But then they take it back from Corbin when Angle punks him on the stage. I still really hope Angle wins if it’s against Corbin, and I can’t be sure there’s going to be a “last minute” change that puts Angle against someone else. There’s also been talk of Cena doing something at Mania, but who knows what’s possible. Even if Angle VS Cena should be the match in just about everyone’s estimation.

My Score: 8.2/10


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