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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (9/30/19)

It’s the epic Raw Season Premiere!

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NEW Raw coverage

The first Raw of the season, the last Raw before going to Hell!

In a Cell, that is. And even with both the Cell and The Fiend in his future, Seth Rollins must defend his WWE Universal Championship against THE Rey Mysterio! Will Rollins be able to retain before he has to face a living nightmare?

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Alexa Bliss VS Sasha Banks; Banks wins.
  • Raw Tag Team Championships: Robert Roode & Dolph Ziggler VS Heavy Machinery; Roode & Ziggler win to retain the Raw Tag Team Championships.
  • Randy Orton VS Seth Rollins; No Contest.
  • The Viking Raiders VS The OC; The Viking Raiders win.
  • Ricochet VS Cesaro; Ricochet wins.
  • WWE United States Championship: AJ Styles VS Cedric Alexander; Styles wins and retains the WWE United States Championship.
  • Lacey Evans VS Natalya; Evans wins.
  • WWE Universal Championship: Seth Rollins VS Rusev; No Contest, Rollins retains the WWE Universal Champion.

PLAY BY PLAY

Raw is LEGENDARY!

A new season, a new logo, a new theme song, but something classic is back: PYRO! But another new change is the commentary team! Vic Joseph and Dio Maddin move over from 205 Live to join the King, Jerry Lawler!

 

Rey Mysterio heads to the ring!

The King of Lucha Libre is here ahead of his WWE Universal Championship on tonight’s stacked premiere. Phoenix is fired up to see the living legend, and Dominick is in the crowd to support his father from the front row. Mysterio speaks to the crowd, nothing that he has the Universal Championship match, and his son is why he’s here. Mysterio owes this to Dominick, and he loves him. “Tonight, I’m going to bring that Universal Championship-” Wait, is that Brock Lesnar?! He was announced to be in town, but no one expected him now! Lesnar and Paul Heyman head to the ring, circle it a moment, then hop in the ring. Mysterio gives Lesnar space but he doesn’t leave the ring. Heyman starts to introduce himself, but Mysterio snatches the mic! Mysterio talks to Heyman, but Lesnar gives him an F5! Fans boo and Dominick is certainly not happy, but Lesnar deadlifts Mysterio with ease, for another F5!

Lesnar paces as fans divided. Lesnar spots Dominick in the crowd, and then heads over! Dominick sits down, naturally not wanting trouble from The Beast, but the Beast grabs Dominick and drags him over the barrier! To then scoop up, and ram into the post! And slam him on the floor! Even Heyman seems shocked by this brutality! Lesnar puts Dominick in the ring with Mysterio, who has now come to. Mysterio watches as Lesnar gives Dominick a MASSIVE German Suplex! Mysterio rushes in to get between Lesnar and Dominick, but gets a third F5!! The referees rush out to tell Lesnar to stop but Heyman himself is speechless. Lesnar starts to leave, but then comes back! He hops right back in the ring, hauls Mysterio up, and gives him a HUGE suplex! Then he drags Dominick up for another suplex! Only now does Heyman shouts for Lesnar to stop, and Lesnar hops out of the ring.

Fans all boo as Heyman reasons with Lesnar, but it doesn’t matter! Lesnar goes after security! Fit Finlay gets a boot! Mysterio gets tossed out! Dominick gets tossed out! Fans boo and jeer while Lesnar paces. Lesnar seems oddly conflicted, but fans are all united in chanting, “A**hole!” The Beast tears off his shirt and laughs, holding the shirt up like he would a title belt. Is this just a sampler of what is in store for Kofi Kingston on SmackDown’s Fox premiere?

 

Raw shows footage from the commercial break.

Mysterio was able to get up under his own power, but he had to be there as his son was put on a stretcher with a neck brace. Mysterio apologizes to Dominick, but will Mysterio be able to compete after what he just went through, both physically and emotionally?

 

Alexa Bliss VS Sasha Banks!

The Goddess and The Boss have had heated and personal rivalries for years now, but now Alexa will just be used as a tune-up for Sasha before going against Becky Lynch. Will Alexa be a speed bump on Sasha’s road back to the Raw Women’s Championship?

Before the bell rings, The Man comes around! Becky is here and she holds up her Raw Women’s Championship! She joins commentary and the match begins.

Sasha and Alexa rush each other and Sasha throws Alexa down. Sasha rains down rights but lets up to put Alexa in a corner. Alexa blocks the bump to give the bump and stomps away! The ref backs Alexa up, but Alexa runs back in, only to be put on the apron. Sasha punches Alexa off the apron, and then she taunts Becky despite the distance. But Becky gets up on the desk to shout back. Fans are on Becky’s side, and Raw goes picture in picture.

Sasha and Becky keep talking trash, but Alexa yanks Sasha down to roll her up! TWO, and Alexa hip tosses Sasha to an armlock! Sasha endures and fights her way up while Raw returns to single picture. Alexa rolls Sasha to a cover, TWO! Becky takes the jacket off while Alexa dropkicks Sasha down. Sasha bails out but Alexa slides for a dropkick. Sasha takes a page out of Nikki Cross’ book and gets Alexa in the skirt, but Alexa knows that trick, too! Alexa punches Sasha away and gets out from under. But Sasha is ready and kicks Alexa down! Sasha wants after Alexa and drags her into the ring. Cover, TWO! Sasha gets angry but she sees Becky getting ready. Sasha stomps away on Alexa in a corner then snapmares her into a half surfboard. Becky is wrapping her fists while she watches! ALexa kicks Sasha and tilt-o-whirls her to buckles! Sasha staggers while Alexa catches her breath.

Sasha gets Alexa first but Alexa kicks her away. Alexa dodges and rallies with clotheslines! Alexa drops knees, Insult but no Injury, Sasha shining wizards Alexa down! Cover, TWO! Sasha keeps on Alexa with a scoop but Alexa slips out to SLAP then ROCK Sasha. Sasha shoves Alexa away and then calls for Bayley? No it was a fake-out! Sasha kicks Alexa down in her bad leg, then covers! Sasha wins!

Winner: Sasha Banks, by pinfall

Becky hops off commentary, and decides to head for the ring. Sasha welcomes it, and the two brawl! Fans are fired up as Becky gets Sasha down for furious fists! And then up for uppercuts! Sasha bails out through the crowd! Becky asks Sasha where she’s going. Sasha can run now, but come Sunday, she’s not leaving the Cell until Becky’s done. The attack has woken up the Irish fire inside. Sasha made it personal, Becky will make it painful. The Man, The Boss, The Cell and retribution are all coming around! Who leaves the sinister structure THE Raw Women’s Champion?

 

Backstage interview with Seth Rollins.

Charly Caruso wants to talk with him about The Fiend strangely coming to his aid last week, but Rollins would rather address what happened tonight. Lesnar attacked Rey Mysterio and Dominick. It isn’t a surprise because it’s Lesnar, but Rollins is disappointed and disgusted. As for Hell in a Cell, Rollins isn’t sure how to game plan for “some thing,” but this title means too much for him to go quietly. Rollins will find a way to #SurviveAndPrevail and stay champion. But tonight’s Raw season premiere from Phoenix. Mysterio is in no shape to compete, but he has a title match in his back pocket, Rollins promises it. But Rollins also promised a Universal Championship match. This is an opportunity for someone to step up. Rollins vows to #BurnItDown no matter who it is!

 

Raw Tag Team Championships: Robert Roode & Dolph Ziggler VS Heavy Machinery!

This GLORIOUS combination take on literally the biggest challenge they could as SmackDown’s Tucker Knight & Otis Dozovic crossover for a title shot! Will the Raw Tag Team titles stay on Raw? Or will SmackDown return the favor by taking Raw’s titles for their own?

Introductions are made, the belts are raised, and the teams sort out. This match starts with Ziggler and Tucker!

Ziggler and Tucker circle and tie up. Ziggler keeps up and gets around to sleeper hold, but Tucker gets him on ropes. The ref calls for a break, and the two back off. They go again and Ziggler gets a headlock. Tucker powers out and bumps Ziggler with a shoulder. He didn’t even hit that hard and Ziggler staggers. Tucker runs and runs Ziggler over! Then he runs to leap over and dropkick Ziggler down! Cover, TWO! Tucker scoops Ziggler in a suplex and Otis tags in. Otis takes the hand-off and then manages to keep Ziggler up! Then he drops him down hard, covers, TWO! Ziggler reaches for Roode but Otis drags him up. Ziggler hits back with haymakers then dropkicks Otis down! Ziggler tags Roode, and they double whip Dozer to the ropes. Dozer bulldozes through and then tags Tucker! Heavy Machinery takes a man each, for stalling suplexes! Heavy Machinery then runs, to belly bump both men! And belly bump to celebrate! Fans are fired up with Tucker and Otis as we go to break.

Raw returns and Tucker has Ziggler in a headlock. Ziggler powers out but Tucker hits Roode’s cheap shot away. Tucker hip tosses Ziggler down, but Roode dumps Tucker out! Ziggler hurries over while Otis protests, and Roode tags in. Roode drags Tucker up to ram into the apron, then throws him into barriers! Roode stomps Tucker down and around, then puts Tucker in the ring. Roode stomps Tucker in the corner then Ziggler tags back in. Roode scrapes Tucker’s eyes then Ziggler gives him a neckbreaker. Cover, TWO! Tucker reaches but Ziggler is on him first with a sleeper hold. Fans rally up and Tucker fights as Otis fires up. Ziggler pulls Tucker away and grinds him down with the chinlock. Tucker endures, fights his way back up, and throws body shots.

Ziggler kicks low then tags Roode back in. They put Tucker in the corner and Ziggler whips Roode for Roode to whip him, BIG splash to a GLORIOUS Spinebuster! Cover, TWO!! Tucker toughs it out and Otis glares at Roode. Ziggler tags in and he mugs Tucker. Ziggler now taunts Tucker, but Tucker gets up, to catch the dropkick for a catapult! Ziggler hits the post! Both men are down but crawling, hot tags to Roode and Otis! Otis rallies! He flapjacks Ziggler and fires up again. Roode kicks Otis but that only gets the truffle shuffle going! Same for the CHOP! Otis scoops Roode for a Fall Away Slam! Roode is in the Dozer Zone, but Ziggler runs in. Otis scoops Ziggler for a spinning scoop slam! Roode is up but Otis squashes him in the corner! Now both Roode and Dolph are in the Dozer Zone, for the CATERPILLAR times two!

Otis scoops Roode but Roode slips away. Roode boots Otis then hops up, but leaps into Otis’ arms! Tag to Tucker, Tucker runs, but Ziggler hits a ZIGZAG outta nowhere! SUPERKICK to Otis! They both post Otis! SUPERKICK for Tucker, which leads to a GLORIOUS DDT! Cover, Roode & Ziggler win!

Winners: Robert Roode & Dolph Ziggler, Roode pinning; still Raw Tag Team Champions

The Raw tag titles stay on Raw! But that’s just the first title match of the night! Will all the champions be as lucky as Roode & Ziggler?

 

Raw presents Miz TV!

The Miz returns to make the Raw season premiere even more must-see! But tonight will be even better, because the Most Must-See WWE Talk Show will have two amazing guests. Before all that, though, Miz must wish Mysterio and Dominick the best. As a father himself, he wouldn’t know what he’d do if someone ever went after one of his kids. But on to the “most highly anticipated Miz TV ever!” First up, the 16-time world champion, the two-time Hall of Famer, the Nature Boy, RIC FLAIR! “WOO~!” Flair makes his way out, and he marvels at Miz’s suit. He’s way too clean tonight. Miz dresses up for an occasion like this! But it’s not just Flair, it is both Jimmy Hart and the 13-time world champion, a Hall of Famer in his own right, the Immortal HULK HOGAN! Hogan and Jimmy head to the ring, and the pythons are still strong.

Hogan and Flair shake hands in the ring and then each legend takes a seat. “I’m over it,” Flair says. “I’m ready,” Hogan says. And the fans are raining down cheers for them both. How many times do you see three legends in one WWE ring? Oh, sorry, Jimmy, Miz meant himself. Flair loves Miz, but he’s had it with Hogan’s theme. Hogan gives Flair a “WOO~!” Miz has both men agree they’re legends, and while Miz could soak in this moment, this moment is about Raw. What better guests than some all-time-greats? Hulkster, what’s it like being in the ring across from the Nature Boy? “Well let me tell you something, brother!” It’s great to be back on Raw, and it’s great to be in Phoenix! And greatness isn’t even enough, but it IS great to be with a friend and a legend, “WOO,” Ric Flair.

Flair feels put on the spot, but he’ll go with it. Hogan may be recognized as the greatest draw, along with Austin, but Flair was the best wrestler, “brother!” Flair will always feel that he’s the best in the ring. It sounds like Flair wants #OneMoreMatch with the 24 inch pythons, brother! Both legends get fired up and Miz is not sure what to say. So he just gets the chairs out of the way. Hogan pokes his finger at Flair, but Flair cools off. They shake hands and admit, they’re not going to have a match. They’re not spring chickens, to say the least. Phoenix wouldn’t mind seeing it, though. Hogan and Flair can add one more page to the legacy. For once, Flair wants a paycheck that matches Hogan’s! And Miz feels that’ll happen. Miz has a huge announcement: Crown Jewel, October 31st, Team Hogan VS Team Flair!! 5v5 with the legends as the coaches for a total of ten of WWE’s best! May the best team win! Then Hogan has a question: “Whatcha gonna do when Hulkamania and my team captain run wild on you, brother?”

Team captain? It’s SETH ROLLINS!? The Universal Champion is a natural pick to be on one of these amazing teams! Rollins has a lot going on right now, but his 5-year-old self would be kicking him if he didn’t do this! He is honored to be Team Hogan! So what is Flair going to do when Team Hogan mops the floor with his team to #BurnItDown?! Well Flair has his captain already: RANDY ORTON! Evolution connections are obvious, but The Viper is definitely a great choice in his own right, too! Flair is fired up as Orton tells Rollins to be 100% focused right now. Crawl out of Hogan’s ass and listen up. Rollins and Orton are the team captains, “WOO~!” So they’ll take their time choosing their teammates. But with this being the season premiere, and that they’re both here, maybe they should have a Captain’s Match. Well Rollins was hoping for a match, so here it is!

Randy Orton VS Seth Rollins!

The ring crew helps change things from Miz TV to regular wrestling, but wait. King Corbin appears? Orton attacks Rollins during the distraction! Rollins fights back but Corbin attacks Rollins with his scepter! The Viper and the Wolf King stomp away! And they jam Rollins! But to Rollins’ rescue, it’s RUSEV!? The Bulgarian Lion takes out Orton then hits a running windmill kick on Corbin! Rusev rams his shoulder into Corbin over and over but Orton pulls him off. RKO denied, MACHKA Kick connects! Rusev dodges Corbin, Rollins SUPERKICKS him! MACHKA Kick for Corbin! Rollins DIVES to hit Orton on the outside! Orton flounders and fans are fired up for Rollins and Rusev! Have each team captain found their first teammates already? Sure seems that way as Rollins and Rusev flex and pose with Hogan on stage!

 

Raw shares footage of Dominick being loaded onto the ambulance.

Mysterio is with his son every step of the way as the medics hurry to get Dominick out of the arena. Mysterio even has to toss his mask off, he is that emotional. The ambulance leaves, as was heard during the Sasha-Alexa match. What will be the emotional and physical state of both father and son?

 

Backstage interview with Rusev.

Charly congrats that Rusev is Team Hogan, but there is a question that needs to be asked: Where is Lana? Rusev has no words. Then let’s focus on Rusev. Rusev is back, what does he hope to accomplish? Rusev isn’t here to talk about his personal life. he is here to talk about Rollins’ problems. He was getting pummeled, but the only one to save him was Rusev! Rusev knows Rollins owes him, so he’s going to collect now! Rusev wants to be that Universal Championship challenger!! Is Team Hogan going to fall apart already?

 

The Authors of Pain speak again.

Akam and Rezar once again speak. They grew up “thousands of miles apart” but lived on “the same street corner of dystopia and atrocity.” They both learned that if you live by the sword, you die by the sword. Therefore, “he who dies from violence, lives for violence.” He who lives for violence, loves violence. he who loves violence, craves violence. He he craves violence, lusts for violence. He who lusts for violence, learns to bring forth violence. He who brings forth violence, becomes violence. He who is violence, is an Author of Pain. A dark message from these embodiments of violence. When and where will the AOP return to the ring?

 

The Viking Raiders VS The OC!

The war rages on as Erik and Ivar once again collide with Karl Anderson & Luke Gallows! But which way will the war sway with it being such a monumental Monday night?

Raw returns and Ivar starts against Gallows as the two big men of the match. The bell rings and the two collide! They brawl with big hands, Ivar whips but Gallows reverses to knee low and club Ivar down. Tag to Anderson but Ivar carries Anderson to the Viking corner! Tag to Erik, Erik feeds Anderson to Ivar’s knee, and then back again! Anderson goes to ropes, but Erik growls as he looms over Anderson. Erik drags Anderson up for big knees, then puts him in a corner. Tag to Ivar, and the Vikings mug Anderson before Ivar gives him another big knee. Ivar runs to knee Anderson in the head! Cover, ONE, but Ivar is on him with an arm wrench. Ivar grinds Anderson down, but Anderson fights his way up. Ivar wrenches and whips but Anderson kicks Ivar away. Tag to Gallows, and Gallows runs, into a scoop! Gallows slips out, shoves Ivar and hits a big elbow in the corner!

Gallows throws big body shots in the corner, and rocks Ivar with an uppercut! Gallows brings Ivar up for headbutts, then stomps! Gallows elbows and punches Ivar in the corner but Ivar hits back. They brawl but Gallows knees low. Gallows kicks Ivar and Ivar crawls away. Gallows runs to boot Ivar down again! Gallows runs to drop an elbow, then covers, TWO! Gallows grinds his elbow into Ivar’s face but Ivar hurries away. Gallows tags Anderson and then whips Anderson into Ivar. Ivar elbows away, rolls under Gallows, tag to Erik! Erik lifts then shoves Anderson, then fires off a strike fest! Gallows gets in but Erik stares him down. Anderson gets up to run at Erik, but he gets Ace Ten Mao! Erik roars and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Erik fights up out of a chinlock. Anderson clubs him down and tags Gallows, and The OC combine for a back suplex neckbreaker! Cover, TWO! Gallows elbows away on Erik then wraps on a chinlock. Erik endures but fights up again. Erik fights free then ROCKS Gallows with a right! Both men are down, fans build to a rally, and hot tags to Ivar and Anderson! Ivar rallies with the sidewalk slam, to the basement crossbody! Fans fire up with the Warbeard as he runs corner to corner. Anderson dodges but gets a seated senton! Gallows misses as Ivar cartwheels to clothesline! Tag to Erik, and the Vikings have Anderson for the high-angler springboard lariat German Suplex! Gallows breaks the cover hard, then YAKUZA Kicks Ivar down! Anderson crawls over, but Erik keeps his eyes on Anderson.

Gallows tags in as Anderson uppercuts Erik away. Erik suplexes Anderson then fires off on Gallows. But Gallows gets the two-hand choke slam! Cover, TWO!! Gallows grows frustrated but he drags Erik up for a bomb. Ivar urns in but Gallows uppercuts him. Gallows whips, but Ivar dodges to DIVE onto Anderson! Ivar tags in, Erik has Gallows for a SPINEBUSTER! Ivar is up top, SUPER SPLASH! Cover, Viking Raiders win!

Winners: The Viking Raiders, Ivar by pinfall

The OC went through another #VikingExperience, and suffer another defeat! Will the warpath continue towards those Raw Tag Team Championships?

 

Charly Caruso shares critical information.

While Mysterio and Dominick are not returning to the arena, Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman are still here. They demand a forum to explain themselves, but authorities are looking into what could be considered a “criminal act” from Lesnar tonight. But to interrupt all of this, Cesaro walks over to say, “Who cares what people think?” There was nothing criminal. If anything, it was entertaining. The only thing criminal is that Lesnar stole away the opportunity for Cesaro to do the same. But Ricochet stands up for Mysterio, saying Cesaro wouldn’t have done a damn thing. Cesaro might be taller than Mysterio, but he’s only half the man. But if Cesaro wants to prove he’s big and bad, then face Ricochet in the ring. Will the Swiss Superman be beat by the One and Only true superhero of Raw?

 

Ricochet VS Cesaro!

The bell rings and Ricochet dropkick-flips and enziguris Cesaro down! Cover, ONE, but Ricochet clobbers Cesaro at the ropes. Cesaro reverses the whip but Ricochet headscisosrs. Cesaro blocks that, Ricochet pops out, but Cesaro clotheslines him down! Things speed up and Cesaro catches Ricochet, but Ricochet slips out. Cesaro elbows Ricochet down, then runs, but gets flipped out of the ring! Then Ricochet FLIES to take him down! Fans fire up with Ricochet as he clubs Cesaro and puts him in the ring. Ricochet aims from a corner, hops up, and leaps, but Cesaro catches him for a backbreaker! Cover, TWO!

Cesaro stomps Ricochet around but the ref backs him off. Cesaro drags Ricochet up out of a corner to throw a big European Uppercut! Cover, ONE! Cesaro keeps on Ricochet with a chinlock. Fans rally and Ricochet fights his way up, and fights out with elbows. Ricochet runs, but Cesaro presses Ricochet up for a Go To Swiss! Cover, TWO!! Cesaro won’t let up, he drags Ricochet in. But Ricochet slides under, only for Cesaro to lift him up. Ricochet forearms, Cesaro boots, but Ricochet baits Cesaro into a post! Ricochet kicks Cesaro away, springboards and flips for a huricanrana driver! Cover, Ricochet wins!

Winner: Ricochet, by pinfall

And with an homage to Mysterio himself with that West Coast Pop! Will this win on Mysterio’s behalf also be what helps Ricochet climb up the ranks towards a title match?

 

Raw returns with an all new Firefly Fun House!

All the puppets are cowering in fear. And Ramblin’ Rabbit is literally scared to death! He’s gone… Oh well! But Bray wants to know what’s going on. They’re all afraid of what will happen when The Fiend and Rollins fight. Mercy’s feathers are quivering already! It’ll be so horrifying! Just calm down. It’s okay to be afraid. To be honest, Bray’s scared, too. There’s nothing like a Hell in a Cell match. What is a Hell in a Cell match like? It’s like a world without chocolate, only worse! OH NO~! It is truly an awful place built to inflict pain and suffering. You enter, but you never truly leave. Not without emotional and physical scars, at least. And Rollins will be trapped in it, with him… What’s gonna happen?! Well he will always protect the Fun House, and the Fireflies! He will die on that hill. But surely he’ll come back no matter what! Yay~!

But Rollins won’t be so lucky. In fact, Bray has a “very very bad feeling” that he can’t wait to hurt Rollins. Idea! Bray will go find “him” and tell him to be nice! Woosh! And then Bray’s back in a flash, laughing like a madman. Because he got us with that one. #LetMeIn. Bye~~! Will this Hell in a Cell be the last one for Rollins?

 

WWE United States Championship: AJ Styles VS Cedric Alexander!

The Phenomenal One has had matches with the #EbonyLion time and again for this title, but they’ll go around one more time to make this Raw season premiere, well, phenomenal. Will Styles make it a clean sweep to keep the Age of Alexander down? Or is this the night it all comes together for the Soul of 205 Live’s Raw resurrection?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and this third time around begins!

Styles throws his shirt at Alexander to ram him into the corner! Then Styles CHOPS Alexander to whip to ropes. Alexander still goes up and over and handsprings to headscissors! Fans duel as Alexander rolls Styles up, TWO! Alexander dropkicks Styles down! Cover, ONE, but Alexander keeps on Styles with haymakers. Styles jawbreakers but Alexander dropkicks again! Alexander knees Styles against the ropes and Styles bails out. Alexander builds speed but he runs into a haymaker from Styles! Styles runs in but gets a dropkick to the legs! Styles hits buckles, but he manages to put Alexander on the apron. Styles catches the springboard for a hotshot! Then Styles slingshots out to forearm Alexander down! Alexander is dazed as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again, and Styles has Alexander in a chinlock. Fans rally up and Alexander fights his way up and out with fast body shots. But Styles puts him on the apron, only for Alexander to shoulder back in. Alexander hits the step-in springboard Complete Shot! Both men are down but stirring. Alexander gets space between him and Styles, but Styles goes to the opposite end. Styles runs in, but Alexander knees him away! Then Alexander whips Styles, only for Styles to reverse. Handspring, Neuralizer enziguri! Alexander brings Styles up, Styles throws strikes but gets Alexander’s elbow! Alexander brings Styles up to a fireman’s carry, for the dropping PELE! Cover, TWO!! Styles survives and shocks Alexander! Alexander gets up and after Styles, but Styles resists the Lumbar Check. Fans duel as Alexander scoops but Styles slips out. Styles scoops and sets Alexander into the dragon sleeper for the inverted DDT! Cover, TWO!! Alexander shocks Styles now!

Styles gets up and drags Alexander in for the Clash! Alexander resists and they end up in a corner. Alexander puts Styles on the outside but Styles forearms back. Styles springboards but Alexander gets under, to scoop for the Michinoku Driver! Cover, TWO!! Styles shocks Alexander back again! But Alexander keeps his focus as fans duel. Alexander throws off the elbow pads, runs, but Styles gets under him! Styles German Suplexes Alexander once! He holds on to pop Alexander up, wheelbarrow facebuster! Cover, TWO!! Styles is shocked again, but Phoenix is still loving it! Styles brings Alexander up as fans duel. Styles wants the Clash, but Alexander flails and gets free to roll Styles! TWO, and Styles swings into a lift! Styles sunset flips, lifts, STYLES CLASH!! Cover, Styles wins!!

Winner: AJ Styles, by pinfall; still WWE United States Champion

A truly phenomenal finish for this rematch, but it is still the Phenomenal One that holds the gold! Will anyone ever get that belt off of Styles?

 

The Street Profits are hyped.

The season premiere of Raw ushers in a new era! To answer the question everyone is asking: “When are the Street Profits going to be in action?” The answer to that question: Wednesday on the USA Network! Because they are STILL N X T! But Montez Ford and Angelo Dawkins will face the Undisputed Era, to take back THEIR NXT Tag Team Championships! But that’s Wednesday. Tonight, Raw has Rollins VS Rusev! Then Rollins still has to face The Fi- don’t say his name. Who? The Fie- NO! No, according to an old janitor, if you say his name three times, poof! He appears. But why was Ford talking to a janitor? Raw feels like the Profits, because #WeWanttheSmoke!

 

Lacey Evans VS Natalya!

The Sassy Southern Belle keeps stealing the Sharpshooter, but now the Queen of Harts will show her how it’s done. Will Natty get even with Lacey to start the new season right?

The bell rings and Natty ties up with Lacey. Lacey headlocks but Natty powers out, only for Lacey to run her over. Lacey takes out that handkerchief early to wipe herself off. Natty gets up and goes at Lacey again with a waistlock. Lacey elbows out then throws Natty to a corner. Lacey fixers her hair but Natty evades in the corner. Natty drops Lacey down then walks over her to basement dropkick! Lacey goes to the apron, shoulder sin then sweeps the legs! She drags Natty out to swing her into the steel steps! The ref checks on Natty but she’s somehow okay. Lacey lounges on the steps as she admires her handiwork. Lacey then puts Natty in to cover, TWO! Lacey dribbles Natty’s face off the mat! Then wraps her up in a “classy” cobra clutch. Natty fights up but Lacey whips her hard into the corner. Lacey swings for a bronco buster! Cover, ONE!

Lacey keeps on Natty with another cobra clutch. Fans rally up for Natty but Lacey calls her “Nasty Natty.” Natty fights up and arm-drags Lacey off. Lacey comes back with a kick and a swinging neckbreaker! Lacey walks all over Natty now to go to the corner. Lacey takes her time climbing, but Natty yanks her down! Natty elbows Lacey and SLAPS her, too! Natty dodges again to fire off furious haymakers on Lacey! The ref pulls Natty off but Natty comes back with the DISCUS! Cover, TWO! Lacey lives but Natty has the legs! But Lacey resists with her strength, and bails out to the apron. Natty goes at Lacey with furious fists, but the ref pulls her off. Lacey rakes the eyes! That wasn’t ladylike! Lacey rolls Natty, holds onto the gear, and Lacey wins!!

Winner: Lacey Evans, by pinfall

The Sassy Southern Belle didn’t need to steal the Sharpshooter, but she will use the Woman’s Right to DECK Natty! She won, but she needed to make a statement. Will Lacey keep it “classy” as she tries to climb back up the ranks?

 

Raw shares John Cena’s huge announcement!

The other 16-time world champion in the WWE is backing a new movement: #FitOps! It uses exercise and charity to help keep veterans healthy both emotionally and physically. Donate now at Fit Ops’ official site, and he will match up to one million dollars!

 

Backstage interview with Paul Heyman.

Heyman won’t let anyone talk to Lesnar. Lesnar’s attack was wanton and reckless, yes. Heyman apologizes to the Mysterio family, but don’t blame Lesnar for that to happen. Blame Vince McMahon! Blame Vince for letting Lesnar on his show while he’s in “fight mode.” There are a lot of “wannabe tough guys” all over pro-wrestling and professional sports in general. But not ONE could do anything about what Lesnar did to Mysterio, Dominick, or will do to Kofi Kingston this Friday! If you want to see history, Kofi can thank God for the Power of Positivity, but the devil thanks Lesnar for lining up the victims! There is no prediction, this is a SPOILER that you will hear, “Your winner and NEW reigning, defending, undisputed WWE Heavyweight Champion of the World, Brock. Lesnar!” Heyamn storms off, but is it truly inevitable that Lesnar reigns again?

 

Backstage interview with Maria Kanellis.

The expecting mother has some explaining to do about this baby daddy drama. Is Rusev really…? Maria can’t believe she’d be asked that. No, Rusev is NOT the father. And Rusev has enough going on with Lana. What is wrong with Charly?

Sasha comes by to snatch the mic. If Becky is the Man, she’s not man enough for the Boss! The Blueprint! The standard in the WWE! Sasha will show Becky carnage when she makes her beg, cry and tap out. There have only been two Women’s Hell in a Cell matches, and Sasha was in the first. So no Man will win the Boss’s match. She hands the mic back to Charly and heads out. Is Sasha going to bank in inside the most sinister structure in wrestling?

 

A limousine pulls into the arena.

But who is inside?

 

WWE Universal Championship: Seth Rollins VS Rusev!

The Bulgarian Lion stepped up to save the Architect, but now he wants a golden favor in return. Randy Orton and Baron Corbin are lurking but Rollins won’t worry about Team Flair until Crown Jewel. For now, can Rollins #BurnItDown and make it to Hell in a Cell still champion? Or will Rusev crush his reign to truly make this season premiere historic?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and this season premiere main event begins!

Rusev and Rollins circle, but Rusev offers a handshake. Rollins takes it but gets pulled down! Rollins escapes the Accolade, and has to smile at Rusev’s trick. Rollins mule kicks but Rusev avoids the stomp, and wants the Accolade again. Rusev avoids a Superkick, but Rollins avoids Rusev’s chop. Rollins clotheslines then fires off strikes, but Rusev stays up. Rollins runs and leaps but in Rusev’s arms for a Fall Away Slam! Rollins bails out to regain composure, but Rusev flex the pecs. Raw goes to break, and The Fiend is on screen saying, “Let Me In!” Will Bray Wyatt hijack the show before it returns?

Raw returns once more, and The Fiend has not appeared. Instead, the match continues and Rusev has Rollins in a bearhug. Rollins elbows but Rusev squeezes harder. Corbin and Orton still watch as Rollins breaks free. Rusev kicks Rollins to a corner but Rollins boots him back. Rollins hops up, BLOCKBUSTER! Both men are down, but fans rally up. Rollins goes at Rusev but Rusev throws forearms. Rollins hits back and the two brawl with big right hands. Rollins CHOPS, then forearms, then CHOPS again. Rollins keeps it up, whips but Rusev reverses. Rollins dodges to hit a Slingblade! Rollins brings Rusev up but Rusev resists the suplex. Rusev suplexes Rollins but Rollins slips out, to dump Rusev over and out! Rollins runs to DIVE! Direct hit but Rollins keeps moving, to DIVE again! Another direct hit, but Phoenix fires up for Rollins as he puts Rusev in. Rollins climbs up top and leaps, big crossbody! But Rusev rolls through to lift Rollins, only for Rollins to cradle counter, TWO!

Rusev ROUNDHOUSES Rollins, then picks him up for a swinging slam! Cover, TWO! Rusev keeps his focus as he goes to a corner. Rusev stomps as fans duel and rally. Rollins rises and Rusev aims, but Rusev misses the kick for Rollins to roll him! TOW, SUPERKICK! Deadlift but Rusev resists again. Rollins still gets Rusev up for the Falcon Arrow! Cover, TWO!! Rusev is tough and Rollins nods respect. But Rollins has more to give and fans cheer as he aims. Rollins mule kicks, runs, but Rusev avoids the stomp to put Rollins on the apron. Rollins elbows back then springboards, but into a MACHKA Kick! Wait, is that… Bobby Lashley!? What is the Rocky Mountain Machine doing back? He motions for the belt, but he isn’t alone. Because accompanying Lashley is… LANA!? Rusev’s wife is with another man!? They even kiss!! Rusev is appalled but he can’t look away. But then… THE LIGHTS GO OUT!!

THE FIEND ATTACKS ROLLINS!! THE FIEND ATTACKS ROLLINS! He smothers Rollins into the post with the Mandible Claw!! And he laughs as he does it! The lights go back out, and Bray’s laugh echoes out. Rollins keeps the title, but is he going to lose much more than that at Hell in a Cell?

 


 

My Thoughts:

Well, one thing about tonight’s “season premiere” for Raw, it wasn’t boring. Rey Mysterio opens the show, and the fact he wasn’t in ring gear was an early warning of something happening. As was his having Dominick in the crowd. I just didn’t expect it to coincide with Brock Lesnar’s appearance, and I definitely did not expect Lesnar to attack Mysterio and Dominick to that degree. It was definitely some shock factor to boost this episode’s opening hour, but it worked to get some major Heel heat on Lesnar ahead of what will surely get him more heat: beating Kofi Kingston on SmackDown’s Fox debut. Heyman’s promo later was pretty great, too, putting the blame on Vince essentially wanting ratings over safety. We could certainly blame Vince for a lot of things wrong with WWE in general, even for some of the things tonight that just felt odd.

Team Roode Dolph had a really great tag match with Heavy Machinery, and it seems fans still really like Otis’ antics. But it seems that the brands aren’t trading tag titles, so SmackDown gets theirs back in the Draft when The Revival surely move over. Viking Raiders VS The OC was another solid match, but the relative silence from Phoenix is proof that Vince is to blame for how those two teams have been portrayed, especially “Erik and Ivar.” The Vikings keep winning, surely they’ll step up to #RoodeDolph in time for the next PPV. Speaking of the next PPV, Crown Jewel is coming as our Halloween trick, but there is a treat in that Team Flair VS Team Hogan match. The Miz TV segment with them was fairly fun, but Flair was a bit too fired up. Rollins and Orton being team captains makes a lot of sense, but given the weird swerve of them having a match to introduce teammates was not in line with anything else tonight. They should’ve waited to name captains next week, so blame Vince for shoving stuff in just because.

Ricochet VS Cesaro was a great step forward from the story that was building between Cesaro and Mysterio, and it was a great match for both Cesaro and Ricochet. Ricochet wins to keep afloat, maybe he gets another shot at the United States Championship. Styles VS Alexander was a great match for that United States Championship. But even with this being the season premiere, it makes sense for Styles to retain. The Draft could easily swap midcard champions, as tends to be what happens with Drafts and Shake-Ups, so Styles goes into that with momentum. The AOP had a really good and very menacing promo, so whichever tag team division they’re drafted to, I can’t wait to see them go after tag titles and return to where they were a year ago, before Survivor Series 2018’s awful “AoPeePee” stuff that, again, we blame Vince for.

Lacey and Natty was filler, and not even equal to their previous matches. Blame Vince. Alexa VS Sasha was pretty solid, but it was of course just for Sasha’s momentum. Becky being on the desk the entire time was pretty great, as was her running Sasha off. Sasha has a decent response promo later that night, but the match will surely make up for any and all hiccups. Of course, there’s also SmackDown’s Horsewomen tag match for one last chance, that could go a long way to determining a winner on Sunday. And while brief, Maria confirms Rusev is NOT the father, so thankfully that is all over with since it felt like no one but Vince wanted it in the first place. Firefly Fun House was especially manic tonight, but that’s likely because we’re getting the payoff on Sunday.

Rollins VS Rusev was pretty good, and it works that Orton and Corbin were watching because of the coming Crown Jewel match. However, things go deep into “Blame Vince” territory when half the reason the main event ends is because Lana and Lashley are making out for way too long on the ramp. We’re getting some sort of marital dysfunction story out of Rusev and Lana now, just as we got away from the Kanellis stuff. But at least we got what we all expected, in The Fiend attacking! He didn’t attack who we thought in the legends of Hogan and Flair, and it would’ve worked better if we just didn’t have to deal with this new Lana-Lashley-Rusev angle so that Fiend could go after Rusev. That would’ve kept a parallel between what Fiend did last week, going after Strowman so that Rollins wouldn’t lose. But instead, Fiend reaches the point where he goes right after Rollins to bring Rollins’ health in question for Sunday. I hope the math doesn’t apply this time. Fiend should be able to stand tall at the end of Raw and still win the title on Sunday. Otherwise, it’ll be no different than how Vince has treated Bray this entire time.

My Score: 8.1/10


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 3.28.2024

TNA tapings from Philly! Knockouts Number 1 Contender is decided! Rich Swann explains his heel turn and Chris Sabin vs Steve Maclin in the main event!

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Hey, even if Xplosion has been a complete waste of 45 minutes, last week’s iMPACT! showed some promise with this newer direction at least. We’re getting a return of the 8 for 1 match for the Knockouts World Title. So we’ll get a number one contender for Jordynne Grace, apparently Chris Sabin and Steve Maclin have a match, but we get some answers from Rich Swann on his heel turn.

Time to see what else we have going on!

Ratings:

  • 8 for 1 Match: Rosemary, Dani Luna,  Xia Brookside & Steph DeLander vs Havok, Jody Threat, Masha Slamovich & Alisha Edwards: Dani wins via Schoolgirl Roll-Up – **
  • Dani Luna vs Steph DeLander vs Xia Brookside vs Rosemary: Steph wins via TKO – * 1/2
  • Grizzled Young Vets (James Drake & Zack Gibson) vs Cody Deaner: GYV wins via Grit Your Teeth – SQUASH
  • Josh Alexander vs Tracy Williams: Josh wins via C4 Spike – ***1/4
  • Mike Bailey w/Trent Seven vs Eddie Edwards w/Brian Myers & Alisha Edwards: Eddie Edwards wins via Boston Knee Party – *** 1/2
  • Steve Maclin vs Chris Sabin: Maclin wins via KIA – *** 1/2

 

Results:

8 for 1 Match: Rosemary, Dani Luna,  Xia Brookside & Steph DeLander vs Havok, Jody Threat, Masha Slamovich & Alisha Edwards

So this is a random tag pairing, which the winning team than faces each other in a Fatal Four Way for Number One Contender position; that explains why half of Decay and Spitfire are on opposite teams. 

Steph faces off with Havok first but tags out to Rosemary to try and shirk responsibility, but Rosemary and Havok work together to level Steph and then Rosemary tags back out to purposefully bring DeLander back into the match. Havok throws Steph around a bit, even Lish gets in some offense, most notably her Bodyscissors Bulldog, but Steph tags out to Dani, Dani and Masha go after each other and then the match slowly starts to break down.

Dani hits the Rope Assisted Blue Thunder Bomb on Masha for 2, and starts looking for the Luna Landing. Masha slips it and we go into a bit of a locomotion Cradle spot which Dani gets the best of and wins the tag for her team!

Dani Luna vs Steph DeLander vs Xia Brookside vs Rosemary

As the match is getting set up, Masha attacks Dani to wipe her out. So the other three start fighting, Xia charges a corner, gets ole’d and she flies into ASH by Elegance who was seated at ringside because she had cosmetic surgery and couldn’t wrestle. ASH posts Xia, gets banished from ringside by the referee, back in the ring Rosemary does her rise from the dead spot and looks to finish Steph but Matt Cardona comes out of nowhere, hits the Radio Silence, Steph DeLander hits the TKO for the easy 1-2-3.

Steph DeLander is number one contender and Matt Cardona is back! Not a terrible wrinkle. The match barely existed but at least these returns are nice. 

GYV hits the ring to complain about Cody Deaner costing them the match against Time Splitters last week. So they call him out and he’s out in Red and Yellow trailer park Flash attire. Santino apparently is allowing Deaner to pick one of the GYV members to fight. Philly picks both, so Deaner attacks both. 

Grizzled Young Vets (James Drake & Zack Gibson) vs Cody Deaner

Cody gets the best of Drake early but then the GYV work over Deaner a bit early, Gibson starts talking smack and Deaner tries to Hulk Up, and it seemingly works. Combination Punches, Manhattan Drop, Corner Bulldog, tries the Deaner DDT, but Gibson cuts him off with a throat chop.

Drake uses the scarf to take advantage of the referee not looking, and then some Grit Your Teeth gives the GYV a win.

Josh Alexander walks out again to be the Talking Weapon…and yeah, not really a big fan of when he speaks. He’s dressed to wrestle so lets hope its an open challenge or a Philadelphia Drink Off with Sandman showing up…or something. Just not a lot of talking, please. OH GOOD, open challenge. Josh calls out Hammerstone, but he gets some Hot Sauce instead of Hammers.

Josh Alexander vs Tracy Williams

As expected with these two, early World of Sport style open with some chain wrestling into athletic counter wrestling and shrugging off both men’s first attempt at submissions. They both take a beat, then we go into a Chop Battle, Williams slows Josh with a Kitchen Sink, but Josh grabs him in the Vertical Suplex and then spill over the ropes. Josh is back in first, Williams tries to crawl up, eats a strike and then eats Josh’s Low Crossbody spot. So now Josh starts dogwalking Williams around the outside.

Josh throws him back in, drives a knee into his face, but as Williams tries to fight back, Josh stops all of that with a Northern Lights Suplex Hold for 2. Josh goes for a Heel Hook to weaken the ankle for a potential Ankle Lock. So just early joint manipulation and Back Breakers from Josh leaves Williams writhing and absorbing so much…not really fighting back much. Tracy tries a desperation short Headbutt to the gut like he’s Spike Dudley, but it seems to just annoy Josh. A few traded Overhand Chops, C4 Spike attempt but Tracy drops his weight. Josh gets a little arrogant, starts with a few half assed slaps and it allows Tracy to fire a few strike, Back Drop Suplex, drives Josh into the corner and sets up the Avalanche Butterfly Suplex. Tracy goes for a submission but Josh is too close to the ropes.

With all of Williams’ offense, Josh manages to fire through and land an Exploder Suplex to rock Tracy. A few more big moves from Josh, into the Power Breaker seems to give Josh all of the momentum. C4 Spike again, Back Drop counter, Back Elbow and Tracy tries a corner set up but Josh cuts him off and they start fighting on the top. Williams counters the Superplex, DDT into the top corner buckle, Death Valley Driver into an STF, then Crossface but Josh is fighting. Piledriver attempt from Williams, straight right says no, Release German Suplex, straps go down but Tracy kicks Josh in the face. They trade Big Boots, Josh with a Backslide into the C4 Spike for the win!

Both these guys chant kicks up, Josh offers the handshake, they go for the corny Indie respect moment and Hammerstone hits the ring and lays them both out. Hammer puts the head gear on Tracy and throws him into the Torture Rack. 

This might be Ali’s best promo ever.

Mike Bailey w/Trent Seven vs Eddie Edwards w/Brian Myers & Alisha Edwards

I do really like The System’s theme song. 

Eddie goes for the NOAH Chop, Bailey ducks the first one and tries to keep things quick, but Eddie catches him and caves in his chest real quick. Front Kick from Bailey into the Back Handspring that culminates into a Gamengiri, Eddie powders and Speedball goes for the Tope con Hilo. Arm Wringer into a Round Kick to the chest. Bailey breaks the count, eats a chop and then get go into a kicks and chops trading spot. Myers provides enough of a distraction since they’re on the outside so Eddie scoops Bailey and Blue Thunder Bomb on the apron.

Another count reset, this time from Eddie and the Chops continue from Eddie. Eventually Eddie throws Bailey back into the ring, very unceremoniously, drops a knee to the eyes and goes for 3 pinfalls in quick succession. Fingers to the eyes, chops to the chest, Backpack Stunner attempt but Speedball wriggles free and John Woo Dropkick gives him some space. Spinning Back Kick, Axe Kick, Round Kick, Running Shooting Star, for 2! Speedball slaps his chest to try and send a message while he starts lighting up Eddie with about half a dozen Round Kicks to the chest. He then goes for the Lightning Kicks while Eddie is on the ropes, Myers pulls out Eddie, Bailey attempts a dive but puts the brakes on, acts like he’s distracted by Myers but avoid Eddie’s sneak attack. Kick to the face into a Corkscrew Asai Moonsault, back in the ring, Tornado Kick from Bailey, goes for Ultima Weapon but he eats a Gamengiri into the Backpack Stunner for 2!

Both men rise, Chop from Bailey sends him on his ass, and we go back to kicks versus chops. Bailey with the combination kicks, tries the Buzzsaw but Eddie moves, Lariat! Tiger Driver attempt, but Bailey says no, Backflip Knees gives Bailey all the momentum. He tries the Tornado set up, Myers and Alisha get involved but Trent Seven nullifes Myers, Bailey with the Double Clutch Superkick to rock Eddie, he goes back to the Tornado set up but Lish grabs his feet, Bailey fights her off, drops Eddie, goes for Ultima Weapon but misses! Boston Knee Party to the back of Bailey’s head, Eddie wins!

There’s a quick video package for the FBI next week. Not sure if that means we only see Guido, or if Vito and others will show up.

Rich homie Swann and AJ Francis show up and I’m fairly sure he named them “First Class”. They keep saying AJ Francis in the same cadence as AJ Styles, so I get what they’re doing there. And Swann basically says AJ was the only one who cared about how Rich was doing, Hendry just stole his thunder and did nothing. “If you ain’t First Class, you’re last” – Talladega Nights references? Well now.

Steve Maclin vs Chris Sabin

Mostly an uneventful start, a few moments from both men, Sabin speeds things up when he ducks out and baits Maclin to try the Scud Missile, but he outsmarts him by sliding back in. Maclin doesn’t full commit to the dive but does roll out a little hard which gives Sabin the chance to jump on him. Baseball Slide, Wristlock over the ring post, throws him back in and looks for a Grounded Top Wristlock. Sabin acting a bit more like Shelley with the joint focus, but Maclin manages to use the ropes to his advantage and bounce Sabin off of them twice.

Maclin finally has some control, Forearm to the low back, drapes Sabin on the middle rope and drives the knee into the back of his head. Maclin lays in some chops, grounds any of Sabin’s attempts and locks in a Chin Lock. Sabin finally fires up , but Maclin hits the Olympic Slam to stifle Sabin’s attempts. Maclin perches Sabin, tries the Superplex but a few punches and a bite gives Sabin an opening and Sabin connects with the Missile Dropkick. Manhattan Drop into a Crucifix cover for 2, Swinging Neckbreaker causes Maclin to retreat to the corner and Sabin focuses a few Forearms to the back of the head and a Snap DDT.

A few wild swings from Maclin give Sabin a gift, so he goes for the Crossface. Maclin barely rolls tot he ropes to break the hold, powders out and moves out of the way of the Plancha. BUSAIKU KNEE to level Sabin. Jar-Headbutt for a near fall! Maclin Tree of Woes Sabin, Caught in the Crosshairs, Sabin sits up but Maclin knows how to avoid the post. A small back and forth, Mayhem for All and only a 2 count! Jar-Headbutt number two misses, La Magistral for only 2, both collide with lariats and then go into the Fighting Spirit spot. Slugfest but Sabin hits a Sole Butt, Sabin tries to continue but Maclin coldcocks Sabin sending him to the outside, Scud Missile Dive – MISSES! Maclin is laid out on the outside, count out starts, Sabin is back in around 6, Maclin barely beats the 10. Springboard Tornado DDT from Sabin for a near fall!

Cradle Shock attempt, but Maclin fights it off. Sabin jumps, misses, Tree of Woe, Caught in the Crosshairs! Maclin tries the KIA but Sabin turns it into a Wrestler’s Bridge Pinfall for only 2, but Maclin holds on to the arms, connects with the KIA and wins!

 

Overall Score: 7/10

Well aside from the fact the opening match was a little bit of a hectic mess and Kon is still a storyline relevant thing…the better portion of the episode was pretty fun. I didn’t love the allusions to Santino handing out rights to challenge and open challenge vouchers, felt like a weird “authority” figure kind of spin. But when he finally showed up and continued to be the lovable goof, its all good.

Ali had his best promo ever, “Mr Rhinoceros”, was a great way to spin into the conversation with Rhyno. Sabin steering more into Shelley’s bag of tricks and still coming up short is interesting. Steph DeLander with the big return win and bringing Cardona back with her is generally a fun angle. Speedball looked awesome and Hammerstone did a great job looking like a massive douche and executing the best Torture Rack since Lex Luger.

Of course there’s a few gripes, but all in all, it was pretty fun.


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Mitchell’s ROH Results & Report! (3/28/24)

Look who finally decided to show up!

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Kyle Fletcher returns to ROH TV!

The ROH World Television Champion is finally back to defend his title! Will the Aussie Arrow hit Blake Christian through the All Heart?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Athena VS Nikita; Athena wins.
  • Cole Karter & Griff Garrison w/Maria Kanellis VS Kaz Jordan & Victor Castella; Karter & Griff win.
  • Dalton Castle VS Nick Comoroto; Castle wins.
  • Brandon Cutler & Colt Cabana VS Rex Lawless & Bryce Donovan; Cutler & Cabana win.
  • Six Man Tag: Top Flight VS KPK; Top Flight wins.
  • Diamante VS Kiera Hogan; Kiera wins.
  • Evil Uno VS JD Drake; Uno wins.
  • ROH World Television Championship: Kyle Fletcher VS Blake Christian; Fletcher wins and retains the title.

PLAY BY PLAY

Athena VS Nikita!

The Fallen Goddess was stressed out watching Hikaru Shida tune up for Supercard of Honor, so she’s getting back in the ring to work through that. Will Athena prove this is still her show? Or can The Russian Vixxen take advantage of Shida being on Athena’s mind?

The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings, and then Athena rushes in! Nikita dodges to rally with lariats and a SLINGBLADE! The fans rally, Nikita runs in at the corner and she SPLASHES, to then BULLDOG! Athena gets spiked and Nikita gets fired up! Nikita brings Athena up, underhooks, then PEDIGREES! Cover, ONE?!? Athena is tough but Nikita is still surprised. Nikita storms up but is sent into buckles! Nikita stops herself just in time, and she ROCKS Athena! Nikita brings Athena in while she goes up the corner, for a HANGING HEADSCISSOR! The ref counts, Nikita lets off, but Athena gets mad!

Athena DIVES and wipes Nikita out against barriers! Athena is mad now, and she brings Nikita up to THROW her into railing! Athena shouts at Nikita, then wheelbarrows to SWING her into barriers! Athena says you’re welcome and takes a bow, then she goes back for Nikita. Athena puts Nikita in, looms over her while soaking up cheers and jeers, then stalks Nikita as she crawls. Athena hauls Nikita up, CLUBS her again and again, then underhooks for a BUTTERFLY SWING! Athena TOSSES Nikita away, drags her up, and then HALF HATCH SLAMS! Nikita is dazed, but Athena sits her up. Athena ties up the legs and puts on a STANDING CROSSFACE! Nikita taps, Athena wins!

Winner: Athena, by submission

Ahead of crossing swords with the Shining Samurai, the ROH Women’s World Champion is sharpening her edge. As such, she SHOTGUNS Nikita back down! The fans boo as Athena CLUBS away on Nikita! Athena then puts Nikita in the Tree of Woe and lifts her up, to KICK away on Nikita’s back! Athena takes the belt, puts it in front of Nikita’s face, and she trots as she takes aim. But wait! Here comes Shida! The fans fire up as Athena runs away! Shida helps Nikita out of the Tree, then picks up the belt Athena left behind! She even dares Athena to come get it back! Is Shida going to be the one that finally dethrones the Overlord? Or will Athena make sure “forever champion” means forever?

 

Backstage interview with Lee Johnson.

Renee Paquette is here to talk with Big Shotty, and notes his impressive 2024 streak. He asked for this time, so what’s going on? Lee says that he has said it before and he will proudly say it again. He is not here to take part, he is here to take over! And now let him add something else: he is here to take titles! Now, he has heard there’s an ROH World Television Championship match between one champion in Kyle Fletcher and All Heart, Blake Christian. Now, whoever comes out victorious, Lee’s calling his shot! Supercard of Honor, Big Shotty’s got next! Lee is ready to swing for the fences, is he going to get his chance to hit it out of the park?

 

Dalton Castle VS Nick Comoroto!

The Peacock is still in his slump, and not even his substitute Boys are enough. Meanwhile, did the Freak Beast really shave his beard? Then which change will be the more hindering? Castle without Brandon & Brent, or Comoroto with Jacoby Watts?

The Code of Honor is upheld, and in tight quarters, and the bell rings. The fans rally for Castle as he and Comoroto circle. Castle squats low, real low, then he rushes up to collar ‘n’ elbow! Comoroto powers Castle right to a corner, the ref counts, and Comoroto lets off at 4. Comoroto makes the pecs dance and then flicks sweat at Castle. Castle storms right up, and he, uh, “hip” checks Comoroto! Comoroto gives it back! Comoroto smirks but Castle gets those hips moving. Then he hits the low leg takedown! He rolls Comoroto then CLUBS away on him! Comoroto gets free, kicks low, then ROCKS Castle with a haymaker!

Comoroto bumps Castle off buckles then RAMS into him again and again and again! The ref counts, Comoroto whips Castle but Castle reverses to TOSS Comoroto! Comoroto holds on and he manages to skin the cat! A big cat at that, but Castle waistlocks! Comoroto holds onto ropes to stop the lift, then he backs Castle into a corner. Comoroto throws elbows, gets space and comes back, but into a BOOT! Castle runs up, into a LARIAT! The fans rally, Comoroto huffs and puffs and brings Castle up. Comoroto reels Castle in, but Castle Alabama Lifts! Comoroto CLUBS Castle down then shoves him away.

Comoroto swings but Castle blocks to ROCK him first! Castle fires more forearms, but Comoroto shoves him away. Comroto runs up, Castle gets around, BIG GERMAN SUPLEX! The fans fire up, Comoroto staggers to his feet, and into an Alabama Lift! BANGAAAAAA~RANG! Cover, Castle wins!

Winner: Dalton Castle, by pinfall

Comoroto is a big man, so this was a big win for The Peacock! But wait, here comes Taya Valkyrie! And she tells Castle, “How dare you say that we are irresponsible! Yeah, we lost The Boys. But after the short time we had them, I realized how rude and annoying they are! So, I’m glad we lost them! Because they were a couple of BAD boys!” The fans boo but Taya says yeah, she went there! And they probably got it from Castle! Because Castle never loved them! Not like Mommy & Daddy TV loved them! So for that, Castle deserves this! Sneak attack by Johnny TV! MOONLIGHT DRIVE and a SHINING WIZARD!

Johnny rains down fists on Castle, then says they were BAD boys! Castle set a bad example for them! They’re all losers! The fans boo but Mr. & Mrs. TV just stand over Castle to make out! Then they stomp Castle on their way out! Even as he wins matches, will Castle still be lost in life with The Boys lost in the woods of Canada?

 

Mark Briscoe speaks.

“Philadelphia. For #DemBoys, that is the origin of professional wrestling. That’s when we felt it. That’s when we said this is in our soul, man.” Jay himself once said, “This is what we was created to do, man.” Baddest tag team on the planet, almost a quarter century, and BOOM, it gets taken away in a moment. So Mark’s starting over from square one, flying solo. Continental Classic, the game plan was to get on top, and to soar! But his wings were clipped, humbled once again. But there’s this voice inside of him, it’s Jay’s voice, that says, “Don’t worry about that broken wing, son. You was born to fly. With wings like an eagle, we gonna mount up.”

Mark knows Eddie Kingston’s got that same voice inside of him. “Ain’t that some s*it?” Mark knows Eddie’s had the highs and lows, the peaks and valleys, just like Mark. Eddie became the first American Triple Crown Champion, took on all comers defending that, but then lost to the AEW Continental Championship to Kazuchika Okada. Eddie talked to his mentor, Homicide, and agreed that it is time to tap into something from the past. Into that hungry Eddie, that ruthless Eddie, that vicious Eddie. The Eddie with that dog in him! That Pitbull! Every yard has a top dog, but Eddie, you may be ROH World Champion, but Mark’s gonna show you in Philly that MARK is top dog!

April 5th marks 11 years to the day that brother Jay won his first ROH World Championship. And just like he told Mark, time to man up. Eddie, it is time to man up. Philly, it is time to man up! Mark Briscoe VS Eddie Kingston, ROH World Championship, Supercard of Honor, we will man up. But who will be the man that holds up that title at the end of the night?

 

Diamante VS Kiera Hogan!

The Cuban Diamond won big in a Four Corner Survival, and she won in the opening round of the ROH Women’s World Television Championship tournament. Both of those losses only served to fan the flames, and now Kiera wants to turn up the heat! Will Kiera get her lick back? Or does Diamante just have Kiera’s number?

The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings, and the fans rally as the two circle. They tie up, Diamante headlocks, and she grinds the hold. Kiera powers up but can’t power out as Diamante holds tight. Kiera tries again, but Diamante still keeps the headlock on. Kiera throws body shots, powers out again and is free, but Diamante runs her over! Cover, ONE, and the two stand off. The fans rally as the two reset and go again. Kiera headlocks this time, dares Diamante to keep that same energy now, but Diamante grinds her forearm into Kiera’s face. Diamante powers out but Kiera runs her over! “And that’s all, periodt!”

The fans rally as the two reset again. Kiera wants that Miami heat, so the two tie up again. Kiera wrenches an arm, wristlocks, but Diamante rolls, kips up and wrenches back. Diamante wristlocks then hammerlocks, then spins Kiera for a snapmare. Diamante clamps on with a chinlock and she grinds Kiera down. Kiera fights up, pries the hold open, and fans cheer as she wrenches back. Kiera uses the hammerlock to wrangle Diamante, then she bridges over! Diamante endures, so Kiera floats to a facelock. Diamante gator rolls free and wrenches Kiera to a top mounted armlock! Kiera endures and the fans rally again.

Kiera fights up, wrenches and wristlocks, but Diamante goes to ropes. The ref counts, Kiera lets off quickly, and the armbands come off! They tie up, Kiera wrenches and wristlocks. Diamante ROCKS Kiera! Kiera falls, Diamante stomps her, then drags her up to ROCK her again! Diamante ROCKS Kiera one more time, then runs the ropes, but into a BOOT! And ROUNDHOUSE! Cover, TWO! Diamante stays in this and she kicks right back. Diamante whips, Kiera ducks ‘n’ whips to then drop and trip Diamante! Kiera keeps moving, STEP-UP LEG DROP! Cover, TWO! Diamante sputters and goes to a corner but Kiera eggs her on.

Kiera fires forearms now, then whips corner to corner. Diamante hits buckles hard, then Kiera fires up. The fans rally behind her as she runs in, but Diamante drop toeholds her into buckles! Diamante then stomps away on Kiera in the corner! The ref counts, Diamante lets off at 4, and she drags Kiera up to put her against buckles. Diamante stomps some more, then goes corner to corner and back again, HYDRAULIC DROPKICK! Diamante drags Kiera to the cover, TWO! Keira stays in this and Diamante is annoyed. Diamante sits Kiera up and traps an arm before she clamps on, cording hold and SHOULDER CLAW!

Kiera endures this modified cobra twist, and Diamante even grinds her forearm into Kiera’s face. The fans rally as Kiera fights up. Kiera throws body shots, ROCKS Diamante, but Diamante RAMS Kiera into the corner! And RAMS her again! Then CHOPS! Diamante puts Kiera up top, ROCKS her, then ROCKS her again! Diamante climbs up to throw more shots, and then brings her up. The fans rally while Kiera blocks the suplex! Kiera throws body shots, then shoves Diamante away! Diamante comes back, but Kiera MISSILE DROPKICKS her! Diamante tumbles and the fans rally while both women are down.

Kiera pounds the mat to fire up again. She nods as she rises, the fans behind her. Kiera runs up to CLOBBER Diamante! And she CLOBBERS her again! Diamante swings, Kiera blocks to snapmare and “EAT IT!” SUPERKICK! The fans fire up as Kiera goes Around the World to HIP ATTACK! Then side to side, BOOT WASH! Cover, ROPEBREAK!! Diamante gets a bit lucky and Kiera is frustrated. Kiera fireman’s carries but Diamante fights it. Then she CLAWS Kiera’s eyes! CHOP BLOCK! Diamante fires up now, she dragon sleepers, and says goodnight. But Kiera throws knees to say not yet!

Kiera snapmares free, runs up, SUPERKICK! Diamante flounders, Kiera hauls her up, FACE THE MUSIC! Bridging cover, Kiera wins!

Winner: Kiera Hogan, by pinfall

The swinging fisherman neckbreaker punctuates this one, periodt! Kiera wants to be the first in line to face the inaugural ROH Women’s World Television Champion, but just who will it be? The Queen of Guinea, Queen Aminata? Or Athena’s protege, Billie Starkz?

 

BREAKING NEWS for Supercard of Honor!

It’s already a big night with the title matches, including the crowning of the first-ever ROH Women’s World TV Champion, but now even Stardom is getting in on the action! It will be a Six Woman Tag as Mina Shirakawa, Maika & Mei Seira take on Saya Kamitani, Tam Nakano & AZM!

 

Hikaru Shida speaks.

“In AEW, I won Woman’s World title three times, I beat Toni Storm, I beat Saraya, Willow, Anna Jay, almost everyone. I need stimulation! And so do you. Right, Athena? Do you remember the moment we faced each other in the ring last year? I know you’ve been excited! I know fans have been excited! But… the person who has been excited most is me. Excited to beat up the ‘forever champ.’ So, hello, ROH! Be ready for a new era. Because Holy Shida has arrived!” The Shining Samurai is ready, but will she be able to cut down the Fallen Goddess?

 

ROH World Television Championship: Kyle Fletcher VS Blake Christian!

As Supercard of Honor approaches, it is about time the Protostar returned to ROH TV. But will this return be less than triumphant? Or will All Heart be an easy target for the Aussie Arrow?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who heads for Philly!

The Code of Honor is not upheld as Kyle kicks Blake’s hand away, so Blake shakes his own hand. The bell rings, the two circle, and they tie up. Blake wrenches, wristlocks, but Kyle shoots around to waistlock and SLAM! The fans boo but Kyle soaks it up. Blake gets up, he and Kyle reset and circle again. They tie up, Blake waistlocks then headlocks. Kyle powers out and runs Blake over! Kyle flexes to show he’s bulking up, but then Blake blocks a stomp! Blake kips up but Kyle breaks free to ROCK Blake! Things speed up, Blake hurdles, drops down, then DROPKICKS! Blake kips up and dusts himself off and the fans cheer.

Blake says va fa Napoli, Kyle rushes in, but he blocks Blake’s arm-drag. Kyle whips Blake away but Blake handsprings to wheelbarrow, victory roll, and SPLASH 182! Cover, TWO! Kyle gets away to ropes and catches his breath. Blake storms up, wrenches and whips, but Kyle blocks by holding ropes! Blake CLUBS the arm, but Kyle avoids the chop to clothesline Blake up and out! Fans boo as Kyle builds speed, but Blake slides in! Kyle stops the tope and goes back to the apron, only to get a 619! The fans fire up as Blake builds speed, and Blake FOSBURY FLOPS into the EYE OF THE HURRICANE!

The fans are thunderous as Blake gets Kyle up and in. Cover, TWO! Kyle stays in this but Blake stays cool. The fans rally again as Blake aims from a corner. Blake says he’s becoming champ, and he runs in, but into a POP-UP SWINGING SIDE SLAM! Cover, TWO! Blake survives and Kyle is annoyed again. Kyle tastes a bit of blood in his mouth, maybe cut his lip or tongue on his teeth. But he shrugs that off to stalk Blake to ropes. Kyle stands Blake up to CHOP him down! The fans “WOO~!” as Kyle pretends he can’t see where Blake went. Fans want that “One More Time!” and Kyle brings Blake up again.

Kyle has Blake in the corner now, winds up, but Blake dodges the chop to CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! MACHINE GUN CHOP! The fans fire up as Blake runs, but Kyle CLOBBERS Blake! Blake is dazed as Kyle hits an Ospreay level elbow shot. Blake crawls to a corner, Kyle eggs the fans on, and Kyle storms up on Blake. Kyle whips corner to corner, but Blake goes up to handstand! Kyle runs in but Blake BOOTS Kyle, then drops into the DDT!! The fans fire up while Kyle sputters! Kyle finds his way to ropes, comes back, but Blake ELBOWS him! Blake whips, Kyle reverses but Blake goes up and over and dragon sleepers! BACKBREAKER to SCREW HIGH KICK!

Kyle tumbles out, scrambles back up, but Blake goes up and out to APRON SPEAR! Blake just keeps going, and he DIVES! Direct hit with the Low-pe Suicida, and Blake puts Kyle right back in! Blake climbs up, Kyle sits up, into the ALL MACHO ELBOW!! Cover, TWO!!! Kyle survives and shocks everyone! Blake is frustrated, but he refocuses and calls his shot. The fans rally as Blake climbs the corner to the top. But Kyle springs up to SWEEP the legs! Blake hits buckles then falls to the mat! Kyle huffs and puffs and aims from the corner. Kyle runs in, GAMANGIRI! And then suplex, BRAINBUSTER!! Cover, TWO?!?

The fans are thunderous again and Kyle cannot believe it! Kyle drags Blake up, but Blake goes to fireman’s carry! Kyle fires off elbows, reels Blake in and- NO, Blake slips outta the bomb to fireman’s carry! Kyle reaches for ropes so Blake HOTSHOTS him on them! Kyle is stuck up there, so Blake goes up a corner! GUILLOTINE FROG SPLASH!! Blake hurries to get Kyle in, then hurries to the corner! Blake runs, step-up, but Kyle makes it a sunset flip! TWO, Blake sits on it, TWO! Kyle deadlifts Blake into a PILEDRIVER!! Cover, Kyle wins!

Winner: Kyle Fletcher, by pinfall (still ROH World Television Champion)

Kyle pretends he can’t hear all the boos, but he can’t pretend he doesn’t see Lee Johnson walking out on stage! The Aussie Arrow may have hit the bull’s eye tonight, but is he about to get shot down by Big Shotty?


My Thoughts:

A great ROH at an hour and 20 minutes, and even the matches I skipped ended up being a lot of fun to watch. Great comedic stuff in Cutler & Cabana winning, with Cutler showing off how cut he is under the tracksuit. And there was a great mix of comedy and meaty men slapping meat in Uno VS JD Drake, with a great win for Uno in his home country of Canada. KPK got a great showing here but that added to the quality of the win for Top Flight. And good win for Maria Kanellis’ boys but there was no story advancement with Spanish Announce Project so that was pointless.

Great opening stuff with Athena, in that she dominated Nikita but then got run off by Shida. Shida had a good promo though I wouldn’t have waited until right before the main event to play it. As I said before, Athena VS Shida is going to be great stuff, and this could be the moment for Athena to lose and then move on to AEW to get in on those titles. There was a great video recap package to hype Billie Starkz VS Queen Aminata, but nothing from those two directly. Diamante VS Kiera was really good, and it was logical for Kiera to win since Diamante won their previous 1v1 match. This doesn’t automatically make Kiera the #1 contender to the Women’s TV title, but she’s in the conversation.

Great match from Castle and Comoroto, and honestly, Comoroto looks good clean shaven. Good win for Castle, and of course Johnny & Taya beat him down to add to his misery. I still want savage, feral Boys to return to help Castle get revenge on Johnny & Taya, though. And awesome main event for the men’s TV title. Blake looked great even in defeat, but uh, what happened to Ethan Page? Another dropped ball in the ROH TV title division and Lee Johnson gets to run with it now. Kyle is more than likely defeating Lee at Supercard, but that really depends on what part he’s going to play in Ospreay’s story within the Don Callis Family.

My Score: 8.7/10


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