Welcome to the Most Moist-See edition of Raw Talk yet!
Raw Talk welcomes just some of the winners from tonight’s MITB qualifying matches! Matt Riddle, Nikki Cross and Johnny Drip Drip are all here to celebrate!
Kevin Patrick welcomes us back to the show!
They’re still picking up the pieces after the great Hell in a Cell PPV last night, but “get in here” as Kevin and R-Truth are back again. How is Truth doing? Remember, say “Former WWE 24/7 Champion.” This is the third time, K-Peezy. They can talk about the show but Kevin and Truth have to get it right. Kevin asks where is the 24/7 Championship, anyway? Truth would like to know that, too. Kevin says “pesky Tozawa” was floating around here, showing off the title. And Kevin couldn’t text Truth about it? Well he was trying to keep track of Tozawa. Also they don’t have each other’s contact info. That’s a good point.
But Raw Talk shares Tozawa’s Instagram post from tonight! “Disguised as a suit man. Truth doesn’t even notice me tho.” So that’s on Truth, then. That imposter! That’s not Tozawa! No, it is him. He’s messing with Truth. What’s Truth gonna do about it? What’s Kevin gonna do about it? What is he going to do to rectify this? Right, sorry. Kevin promises they’ll get there. But first, let’s get into tonight’s Monday Night Raw! Lashley VS Woods, one hell of a match. And just 24 hours after for Lashley was in another Hell in a Cell match! But that was THE WWE Champion Woods was taking the fight to!
Woods wants to prove he’s in no one’s shadow, but Kofi is getting his shot at the title at Money in the Bank. MITB is July 18th, just a month away. Woods proved something to Truth, because Lashley is no joke. Even after everything last night, he kept going. That’s what champions do! Champs take a lickin’ and keep on tickin’! There were no excuses here. And what classic Hurt Business to keep Kofi out and taunt him with Woods’ pain. Kofi must be motivated, and with just a month to go, he’ll be fired up. Truth says Kofi is ready to release something on Lashley. Kofi wants that world title. This just put more on the fire.
Now, we have seven total competitors for the two MITB Ladder matches. For the men, it will be Ricochet, John Morrison and Matt Riddle. For the women, it will be Naomi, Asuka, Alexa Bliss and Nikki Cross. Ricochet beat AJ Styles and that is huge! Truth’s dawg, Riddle, beat his other dawg, McIntyre, and #JoMo got one on Orton! Don’t sleep on Johnny! Naomi and Asuka got Eva Marie after Eva’s ego got the better of her, and then Nikki and Alexa oddly worked together to beat Shayna and Nia. Truth didn’t recognize Nikki in her superhero costume.
But before getting to guests, Kevin brings up how we will again see Rhea Ripley VS Charlotte Flair for the Raw Women’s Championship. Charlotte gets yet another opportunity at MITB, who does Kevin got? Hard to go against Charlotte. Rhea used one of Charlotte’s own tricks against her, retained by Champion’s Advantage with that disqualification, and Charlotte wasn’t happy. Charlotte and Rhea are stepping it up. Tonight’s Raw Talk is going to step it up, too, with the guests they’ve got! Miz ‘n’ Morrison, Riddle and Nikki Cross are all waiting, after the break!
Matt Riddle joins Raw Talk!
Riddle says, “Bro bro bro,” because he’s Sandy Claus handing out his new merchandise! RKBRO mugs, get ’em now! Here’s one for Kevin. Riddle has a shirt for Truth! Look, it’s Mr. Slithers! And the viper stallion on the back! Truth thanks Riddle and they dap. You could wear it, frame it, whatever. Riddle wants to point out he just beat Drew McIntyre, a former WWE Champion! And with no help! He did it by himself! Now he’s going to the MITB Ladder match, and one step closer to being WWE Champion himself! Or wait, it’s good for any title, right? Yeah, any title! Then maybe Riddle will go get Travito the US Championship back! Or RKBRO can go after the Raw Tag Team Championships!
Okay, so obviously Orton lost tonight, but Riddle knows about the Last Chance Triple Threat next week. It is stacked with Orton, McIntyre and AJ Styles, but if Orton wins, RKBRO is going to MITB together! That just stacks the odds in their favor! Kevin asks how Riddle feels about tonight, and to be honestly honest, McIntyre was in a WAR with Lashley. That match took it’s toll while Riddle was home playing games with the kids because it was Father’s Day. Honestly, Riddle was so relaxed while McIntyre was in the fight of his life. And then McIntyre was in another fight of his life with Riddle, and Riddle was just in the right place and right time. Truth high-fives Riddle for that.
Kevin wants Riddle to think about how things could change if he becomes Mr. MITB. Just look at The Miz. He is a two-time WWE World Champion because he was a two-time Mr. MITB. Riddle knows he could do that. But then he’s seen people win the briefcase and fumble it, too. So you can’t just look at all the pros, you gotta look at all the cons. Miz was great at picking an opportunity and manipulating things to his advantage. Riddle would feel pretty sweet with the briefcase, and is sure in the moment he’s more dangerous, but he just isn’t sure he has that way of getting someone when it hurts the most. Truth thinks he can, but Riddle says he’ll be 99.9% sure he gets the title.
Truth likes Riddle’s honesty, but you gotta watch The Miz. Miz is like a used car salesman or something. Yeah, Miz didn’t even win the ladder match but got the briefcase anyway and then cashed it in! Truth says Miz handles his business, but sells some shady stuff. Moving on, Kevin apologizes for being a buzzkill. Balls? No, buzz. Oh right, the accent. Australian or Irish? What’s going on here? But Riddle knows it’s Ireland, he used to hang out with Sheamus. But anyway, what was that with Orton? Riddle admits that Orton was in one of those moods. Orton is moody. TO deal with Orton, you gotta deal with the best of him and the worst of him, the thick and thin, the better and worst.
Riddle tells Randy to shut his eyes and asks what Orton sees. Orton says, “Nothing.” And Riddle says, “That’s my world without you, bro.” Whoa, that’s strong stuff. Orton gets mad, he did lose and maybe blames Riddle, but Riddle knows Orton has stuff to do. Riddle is letting Orton decompress. Riddle knows Orton better than most people think he does. Orton needs time to breathe and reevaluate before next week. This relationship is week to week. It was bad for Orton, amazing for Riddle, Riddle is in the MITB ladder match! Bank in the Money now! Finger lock! But really, Riddle is feeling high into space! With Mars and the aliens! But he’s just so happy.
Yes, Orton had a rough night but he’ll turn the page. When you feel this bad, you can only get better. Great positive thinking! Kevin has everyone give it up for Riddle, and Riddle fires up again. Get your RKBRO merch now before it’s all gone!
The Greatest Tag Team of the 21st Century joins Raw Talk! *stares off into distance*
John Morrison qualified and Miz is honking his wheelchair’s horn in celebration. Truth likes what they’ve got and he congratulates Morrison. If you asked Morrison yesterday if he thought he’d beat Randy Orton in a qualifier match, he’d be doubtful. Miz says Morrison won 1-2-3! Anyone not aware, Miz is in a wheelchair. Can they get a booster seat for him? He’ll sit on his wallet and be towering over everyone! Miz says Morrison will be Mr. MITB and be a champion! Miz knows more about MITB than anyone! He has the inside track! And Morrison has the ladder match experience, too. You can start calling him Mr. Moisty in the Bank!
Truth says Morrison is still wet and stuff. Yeah, he’s dripping right now in that bomber jacket cuz he’s dropping bombs! BOOM! Drip sticks for everyone! Tell your parents all about ’em! Drippin’ ain’t easy. If you’re hurting for a squirtin- Whoa, keep it PG, Morrison! What? How as that not PG? Just be careful, there are electronics here. Kevin asks if Morrison feels he has the advantage right now thanks to Miz. Of course! No one has a bigger advantage than him! Miz has cashed in twice! He knows how it’s done! They heard Riddle acknowledge that. They have a game plan, they have it all figured out, they are going to make Morrison Mr. MITB!
Kevin asks what the plan is and Miz mocks his Irish accent, “Oh, you wanta know tha plan, mate?” Wait they’re still doing Aussie accents. But Truth says they gotta watch it with K-Peezy, he’ll get the kangaroos on him. That is on Kevin’s driver’s license, right? Yeah, sure. Any more brainbusters, then? Morrison has Miz’s back, Miz has had his back, they were an amazing tag team. Remember? White Shadow! Yeah, but Truth remembers Awesome Truth and Miz was always scheming. Truth, stop pointing with the drip sticks. Stick it somewhere else. Keep it PG. Miz says he always has something up his sleeve, as does Morrison. They know how to get the job done!
But Miz is in the wheelchair, isn’t there some difficulties with that still? No way! Didn’t you see their entrance tonight? They were coordinated. Kevin watches the show, he did see that. The replay is great with the slow-mo ride down the ramp. Is that chair electric? No, that was all gravity. Miz’s leg is busted up, it is getting better, but when will he be back? He doesn’t know. Still here, though! Injured and all! He doesn’t have to be here, but he has Morrison’s back. Others stay away because of boo hoo hoo, but BOOM, Miz is here. Truth says Morrison still needs to watch his back with Miz. Why? Miz is in a wheelchair!
By the way, Miz is gonna trick this out like a Mario Kart! Smoke out the back, grease traps and sparklers! No smoking in the ThunderDome, guys. Yeah, Truth knows all about that, huh? Remember all those Euro tours? Okay, okay, time for these two to go! What did Truth do? Nothing! He’ll do something with the drip sticks, that’s for sure. Looks like he’s trying to start a fire with them. Where there’s fire, there’s smoke. Kevin definitely wants to talk with Truth about those trips during commercial. Let’s do that right now, huh?
Nikki Cross joins Raw Talk!
The last guest of the night is one of the most fun person in the world, R-Truth! Just kidding, it’s Nikki! Nikki is ready to be in the Women’s MITB! She is pumped! And tagged with Alexa Bliss like it was the good ol’ days. Well, some much has happened to the both of them the last six months. They’ve been on different journeys. Tonight, the goal, the mission, the whole point of tonight, was to win against Shayna & Nia and then get to the MITB ladder match. So that was what they did, her and Alexa, they’re in! Now, FIRE, BABY! Nikki is heading to the next goal, and it is every woman for themselves! No teams in MITB, baby! None! Everyone wants that briefcase, Nikki wants to be NIKKI in the Bank! Oh, that sounds great already!
Kevin asks if Truth saw how Nikki finished off the match. Oh, yeah, a pin on Shayna. Nikki’s new gear is interesting, too. What is the story of this again? Can she fly? Well, Nikki is really happy they asked. This is a little new for the fans to share with her. She does not have superpowers, she knows that. She can’t fly, doesn’t have super strength or anything. But putting this cape on, this mask, these wrist gauntlets and armbands, the whole outfit, she feels like she can do anything! She might fail, she might fall, but here’s the thing: she’ll keep getting back up because she has to believe in herself. All anyone can really do is believe in themselves, and she wants to share that with the fans.
These last few weeks, Nikki was putting this together, and here it is! She’s so excited! So are Truth and Kevin. Truth brings up the gifts, from the RKBRO mug and shirt to the Drip Sticks. Did Nikki perhaps bring them something…? Oh, uh… The gift of Nikki! Nikki strikes a heroic pose and Truth does appreciate it. Nikki is the gift, and she does another Wonder Woman spin. Truth helps her spin the chair for “slow-mo.” She wobbles a bit but he helps her stay up. Kevin thanks Nikki for her time, and thanks us for tuning in. He hopes to see us again next week for more!
A great Raw Talk, and there’s always so much great energy when Riddle is on, and the same for Miz and Morrison. Having them all on was great, but I’m surprised no one brought up the scooter-wheelchair chase from tonight. That had me dying laughing. But Riddle is pumped as always, I like his way of framing Orton’s side of the story, and I’m sure it’ll be referenced next week on Raw, too. Morrison and Miz continue to have a great dynamic, and that is the same for having a great dynamic with Truth. But as I said for the Raw article, I don’t see Morrison winning because it’d be too easy with Miz right there with him and how it’s just a rehash of last year.
Nikki Cross was great tonight, and she pretty much said the same things in her promo to introduce this costume. I really wish she nailed down the name of this persona, she was almost too hyper with “the spirit” and “the spark” but it wasn’t clear which one she liked better. I think it’ll end up being “The Spirit” as in, “that’s the spirit!” Y’know, that encouraging phrase about the positive attitude. But I still feel like this will be a short-lived bit because something could happen between her and Alexa for Lily to have a human host.