Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (3/2/20)

Raw turns the corner on the Road to WrestleMania!

Published

3 years ago

March 2, 2020

Steven Mitchell

The Raw After Super Showdown, and BEFORE Elimination Chamber!

WWE Super Showdown passed but we’ve already got Elimination Chamber on the way! What will Raw to do shift gears on the Road to WrestleMania?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

Raw Tag Team Championships “Now or Never” Match: Seth Rollins & Murphy VS The Street Profits; The Street Profits win and become the new Raw Tag Team Champions.
WWE 24/7 Championship: Riddick Moss VS Ricochet; Moss wins and retains the WWE 24/7 Championship.
Aleister Black VS Karl Anderson w/ The OC; Aleister wins.
Aleister Black VS Luke Gallows w/ The OC; Aleister wins, by disqualification.
AJ Styles w/ The OC VS Aleister Black; Styles wins.
Liv Morgan VS Ruby Riott, Special Guest Referee: Sarah Logan; Morgan wins.
Kairi Sane w/ Asuka VS Shayna Baszler; Baszler wins.
Angel Garza & Andrade Almas w/ Zelina Vega VS Humberto Carrillo & Rey Mysterio; Carrillo & Mysterio win.

PLAY BY PLAY

The Beast opens Raw!

With the Road to WrestleMania in the home stretch, the WWE World Champion returns once again! He successfully retained against Ricochet at WWE Super Showdown and Paul Heyman gives his usual introduction for himself and the reigning, defending, undisputed WWE Heavyweight Champion of the world, BRRROCK! LESNARRR! And Heyman apologizes because he “can’t do it.” This is literally their job to come out and hype the fans up on WrestleMania. Heyman gives credit where credit is due, and while this will be the most stacked WrestleMania in years, the main event “is a sham.” Fans can boo all they want, but we all know that “they” are trying to sell us on Drew McIntyre. Ladies and gentlemen, Drew McIntyre “is a hyped up fraud.”

Heyman wants us to understand why we cheer so much for McIntyre. At the Royal Rumble, Brock Lesnar didn’t just survive 15 “of the top stars in WWE,” he massacred those 15 consecutive top starts, only to get hit from behind in the balls by Ricochet. That left Lesnar vulnerable to McIntyre’s Claymore that sent Lesnar up and out, eliminating him from the match. Fans cheer that, “like the Pavlovian dogs I tell you you are.” But there are no excuses as to McIntyre kicking Lesnar in his face and out of the ring, “but how in the hell” does that prove McIntyre can pin Lesnar? HE CAN’T! How does that prove McIntyre can submit Lesnar? HE CAN’T! It just shows McIntyre can take advantage of a situation. And the next time Lesnar sees McIntyre, it’ll be over like that.

And why is that? “Because Drew McIntyre is nothing more than a stupid, big bitch that’s going to get squashed at Wrestle-” Here comes McIntyre! The Scottish Stud has that Terminator stare on Lesnar as he heads to the ring. McIntyre gets in the ring and in Lesnar’s face. Fans cheer for “Drew! Drew!” as Lesnar grins. Lesnar backs away, but what about Heyman’s promise? Lesnar rushes McIntyre but gets a CLAYMORE!! McIntyre kips up as fans lose their minds! Well, it was over “like that,” for Lesnar. Can McIntyre do that again at WrestleMania?

Heyman helps Lesnar out of the ring, both men completely shocked at what just happened. The fans troll with “You Deserve It!” and “Hey hey hey! Good-bye~!” as Lesnar and Heyman go up the ramp. Lesnar stares out at Brooklyn as he reaches the stage, but McIntyre runs back out! CLAYMORE AGAIN!! The Scottish Stud snatches up the WWE Championship to hold it up! Lesnar rises and fans want “One More Time!” CLAYMORE THE THIRD!! Brooklyn loses its mind all over again as McIntyre stands over his future opponent! Will McIntyre be the one to slay the Beast once and for all?!

Raw Tag Team Championships “Now or Never” Match: Seth Rollins & Murphy VS The Street Profits!

Super Showdown was their first chance, this is their last! If Montez Ford and Angelo Dawkins fail to dethrone the “Monday Night Pariah” and “Murph the Smurf,” they can never challenge for these titles again, so long as they belong to Rollins & Buddy. Is this the motivation the Profits need to get the smoke?

“Where Brooklyn at? Where Brooklyn at?” Brooklyn lets the Profits know “We Want the Smoke!” Tonight is now or never! Ford & Dawkins have worked for YEARS to get this opportunity! If Rollins and Murphy get the win, then the fight is over. But the joke’s on them. When the pressure’s on, the Profits cook. So Brooklyn better get the Solo cups out because the Profits are up! The tag team champions make their entrance now, and we begin this all or nothing rematch!

Before the bell, Rollins and Murphy attack! The Profits fight them off, throw out Rollins, and then throw out Murphy. Fans fire up with Ford as he FLIES! But he’s caught, and BARRIER BOMBED! Dawkins runs over but Rollins and Murphy get away. Raw goes picture in picture as Rollins and Murphy now stand tall in the ring.

Dawkins checks on Ford but Rollins and Murphy flank him. Dawkins throws big right hands to ROCK Rollins and Murphy in turn, then he gets Murphy in to SPEAR! The bell rings and Dawkins bumps Murphy off buckles. Dawkins runs into a boot and staggers back. Murphy runs in, misses, but Rollins tags in. Dawkins runs back in but Murphy dodges. Dawkins keeps from crashing into buckles then decks Rollins. He climbs up but Rollins trips him up and tucks him in! Murphy hits CHEEKY NANDOS! Rollins hops in and both he and Murphy POWERBOMB Dawkins down! Cover, TWO! Rollins argues with the ref but the count is the count.

Rollins goes to the corner and watches Dawkins stand. Springboard flying knee! Cover, TWO! Rollins grows frustrated with Dawkins but he drags him up to slap him around. Dawkins gets angry and ROCKS Rollins with a right! Murphy tags in but his superkick is blocked. Rollins’ SUPERKICK hits, then Murphy adds one, before they DOUBLE SUPERKICK Dawkins down! Cover, TWO! Dawkins survives and Murphy snarls as he drags him up. Murphy knees and kicks Dawkins in the back, covers, TWO! Murphy’s right on Dawkins with a chinlock. Dawkins endures as Murphy grinds him down, but he fights his way up as fans cheer.

Raw returns to single picture as Dawkins gets to his feet. Dawkins fights with back elbows but Murphy elbows Dawkins down. Murphy clamps on with a facelock but Dawkins blocks the suplex. Dawkins suplexes but Murphy slips out to throw forearms. Murphy throws Dawkins out and tags Rollins. Rollins fetches Dawkins but Dawkins flapjacks him! Murphy hurries over but leaps into an EXPLODER! The Authors of Pain watch but it’s hard to tell if they’re concerned. Dawkins gets in to hot tag Ford! And Ford FLIES! This time he takes Rollins and Murphy out! Ford puts Rollins in but Murphy hurries after. Murphy throws Ford to the apron but Ford springboards for a HUGE crossbody!

Ford clotheslines Murphy out and slips out of a back suplex to DDT Rollins down! And kip up! Brooklyn is thunderous as he hits a standing moonsault! Cover, TWO! Ford keeps going and heads back up top. Rollins rises but Ford leaps over. Rollins gets Ford with a Slingblade! The Monday Night Messiah sneers as he aims from a corner, but Ford dodges the stomp! Murphy tags in, Ford goes to huricanrana but Rollins blocks, buckle bomb enziguri combo! Cover, Dawkins just breaks it in time! Rollins springboards but into an uppercut! Dawkins fireman’s carries but Murphy saves Rollins, and together they post Dawkins!

Murphy drags Ford up as Rollins goes to a corner. Tag to Rollins and they bring Ford up. They want another, but Ford huricanranas Rollins INTO the enziguri! Murphy realizes what happens and hurries up top, but Ford gets under the leap. Ford sends Murphy out, Rollins rolls him up, TWO! Ford spins Rollins to ENZIGURI! Rollins is down but Ford fires up as he heads up top! But Rollins shoves Ford down! Ford crashes ‘n’ burns on the floor and the AOP calm down. Rollins calls them over and they stalk up to Ford! The ref sees this before they can do anything, and EJECTS THEM! Rollins is furious but he puts Ford in for himself. Murphy and the AOP keep arguing, and here comes KEVIN! STUNNER!!

The ref never saw that, and Kevin gets away before AOP gives chase! Dawkins BLASTS Murphy into the timekeeper’s area! Ford hurries up top with Rollins in position, for the WORLD STAR SPLASH!! Cover, THE PROFITS WIN!!

Winner: The Street Profits, by pinfall (NEW Raw Tag Team Champions)

Now or never? How about NOW!? The Profits are at an all time high because they have the gold! Will the Road to WrestleMania become a red Solo cup party?

Raw returns as Rollins and Murphy regroup backstage.

Charly Caruso asks them about the defeat. “Oh good for you!” Rollins seethes as he reminds us that anyone who stands in his way will be eradicated! He is the Monday Night Messiah! Rollins and Murphy demand to take on the Profits, take DOWN the Profits and take BACK those Raw Tag Team Championships. As for Kevin Owens, he can name the time, the place and the stipulation. Because when Rollins gets his hands on Kevin, Kevin will be crucified. Will the passion of the Prizefighter cost him everything?

WWE 24/7 Championship: Riddick Moss VS Ricochet!

The One and Only failed to dethrone the Beast and take his WWE World Championship, but can he tackle the Riddick Regimen and take the #OneTrue Championship?

The bell rings and Ricochet waistlocks to a headlock. Moss powers up but Ricochet holds on, so Moss powers out. Ricochet slips out and slides under to CHOP Moss! Ricochet throws forearms and CHOPS then whips Moss corner to corner. Moss reverses but Ricochet goes up and over and speeds up. Ricochet dodges, Moss follows, and BLASTS Ricochet with that shoulder! Moss talks trash and drags Ricochet up to the corner. Moss rams his shoulder into Ricochet then drags him up for clubbing forearms. Fans taunt Moss as he taunts Ricochet. Moss drags Ricochet up for body shots against the ropes. Fans taunt Moss with “Who are you? Who are you?” Does Brooklyn watch NXT UK?

Moss whips Ricochet to ropes but Ricochet rolls off Moss’s back. Ricochet shoves and elbows Moss at the elbows, then springboards, into Moss’s arms! Moss Fall Away Slams Ricochet over and out of the ring! Ricochet crashes ‘n’ burns as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns as Ricochet fights up out of a chinlock. Moss clubs Ricochet down then whips him to ropes. Ricochet boots back, then kicks. Moss blocks that and ducks the enziguri, but not the rewind mule kick! Both men are down and fans rally up for Ricochet. Moss gets to ropes while Ricochet stands up. Ricochet counter punches, bobs ‘n’ weaves with Moss then whips. Moss reverses but Ricochet hits a forearm! Ricochet fires up as Moss flounders to a corner, and Ricochet runs in to shoulder tackle. Ricochet bumps Moss off buckles and kicks him away! Then springboards in, only for mos to get under. Moss elbows back HARD then hops up. Ricochet enziguris back then hops up to SUPER STEINER! Standing shooting star! Cover, TWO!

Ricochet keeps his focus as he brings Moss up. He tries to fireman’s carry but his bad back bothers him. Ricochet ROCKS Moss with an uppercut, then gets the fireman’s carry! But Moss elbows hard and keeps on Ricochet. Ricochet dropkick-flips and enziguris! Superkick gets caught to a back suplex and CLUBBING slam! Moss brings Ricochet back up for a SPIKE Neckbreaker! Cover, Moss wins?!

Winner: Riddick Moss, by pinfall (still WWE 24/7 Champion)

The King of Flight gets grounded by the Riddick Regimen! Is Ricochet on a downward trajectory after visiting Suplex City? Is Moss only going to extend his already historic reign?

AJ Styles w/ The OC VS Aleister Black!

The Phenomenal One and his Good Brothers roughed up the Embodiment of the End, but now he’ll be the one to face the consequences. Will Aleister add on to the humbling The Undertaker gave Styles at Super Showdown?

Well Styles isn’t taking that stupid advice, because Styles is on a collision course with Taker. Hopefully Taker is watching tonight. After what Styles does to Aleister, Taker can consider it a warning. Taker may be a legend among legend, but he’s just holding onto a spotlight that isn’t his anymore. “It’s mine! It’s the Phenomenal AJ Styles!” But now, Aleister makes his entrance, and this payback match begins!

Styles wants Aleister to wait a moment. Aleister is getting the fight he wanted, but he didn’t read the fine print. To get at Styles, he has to first go through the “toughest man in the building, Karl Anderson!” What? Since when? The Machine Gun gets in the ring and this audible is approved!

Aleister Black VS Karl Anderson w/ The OC!

The bell rings, Gallows distracts but Aleister throws hands on Anderson. Anderson knees and whips but Aleister holds ropes. Aleister sends Anderson out onto Gallows then builds speed to wreck Gallows with a dropkick. Aleister goes out and ROUNDHOUSES Anderson down! Fans cheer as Aleister stares Styles down along the way. Styles stays far away as Raw goes to break.

Aleister Black VS Luke Gallows w/ The OC!

Gallows dumps Aleister out and Brooklyn tells the OC off. Gallows throws Aleister into barriers then into steel steps, all while Styles says Aleister brought this on himself. The match isn’t even official yet and Gallows throws Aleister into more barriers. Gallows pushes Aleister in and this second match finally begins.

Gallows runs into Aleister’s boot! And another! And another! Gallows YAKUZA KICKS back! Styles likes what he sees as Gallows drops a big elbow! Gallows glares as Aleister stands up. Gallows runs corner to corner for a big corner uppercut! Aleister falls over and Gallows covers, TWO! Styles still likes it as Gallows elbows away on Aleister’s shoulder and chest. Gallows wraps on a chinlock and leans on Aleister. Styles coaches Gallows on and tells Aleister it’s alright to go to sleep. “We’ve got this one in the bag.” But Aleister fights up and fights out with body shots. Gallows rocks Aleister with an uppercut, but runs into Aleister’s knee! Aleister storms over but Gallows throws him out!

Raw is picture in picture as Anderson finally recovers from the Black Mass. Gallows stomps Aleister on the outside as Anderson and Styles watch. Gallows bumps Aleister off steel steps and then refreshes the ring count. Aleister stirs as the ring count climbs up again. It passes 5 while the OC throw up the Too Sweets. Aleister gets up, staggers around, but gets in at the count of 9.5! Gallows BOOTS him back down! The OC is all fired up as Gallows drags Aleister up to throw him back out. The ref keeps Gallows back so Styles gets in a cheap shot! Another ring count beings and Aleister staggers up and in at 4. Gallows drags Aleister up for a snap suplex then covers, TWO! The OC grows annoyed with Aleister as Gallows clamps on another chinlock.

Aleister endures again as Gallows leans on him. He starts to fade out and falls to the mat. Fans rally up for Aleister and Aleister finds his second wind. Aleister gets up and starts throwing hands! Raw returns to single ipcture as Gallows uppercuts and Aleister KNEES! Aleister ROUNDHOUSES, and again, and again! Gallows blocks one to back elbow and haymaker Aleister to a corner! The ref backs Gallows of but Gallows comes back to throw more hands. The ref reprimands Gallows but he won’t stop! That’s a disqualification!

Winner: Aleister Black, by disqualification

And now Anderson just adds on! Styles still has to face Aleister, but he and the Good Brothers will make sure Aleister stands no chance! Gallows drags Aleister up, he and Anderson give Aleister MAGIC KILLER! Styles says that’s good, and he’ll finally take that match.

AJ Styles w/ The OC VS Aleister Black!

The Phenomenal One waits for Aleister to rise, and Aleister grits his teeth. Aleister refuses to back down so this third match begins! Aleister swings but falls over! Styles kicks and stomps Aleister while he’s down! Styles kicks Aleister to a corner and eggs him to get back up. Aleister drags himself up the ropes but gets a corner clothesline! Styles throws Aleister down and shouts, “This is MY ring!” Styles watches Aleister drag himself up the ropes before throwing a big haymaker! Aleister flounders around but does his best to throw hands. Styles shrugs those shots off but walks into a fast double kick! Aleister blocks Styles’ boot to kick the legs out! But Aleister swings into a BACKBREAKER!

Styles drags Aleister up, and snap BRAIN BUSTERS! Fans boo Styles as he talks trash and paces about. Styles glares down at Aleister as he goes to the apron. Styles prepares his arm and springboards as Aleister rises. PHENOMENAL FOREARM! And then Styles mocks the Undertaker’s custom cover, and wins!

Winner: AJ Styles, by pinfall

The Phenomenal One put Aleister through a gauntlet of his own design, and sent a message to the Dead Man. But will Styles regret giving Taker a reason to respond?

Backstage interview with Ruby Riott.

After returning just to betray her former friend, Liv Morgan, she and Liv will now have it out 1v1, but with their one mutual friend as the special guest referee. Sarah Logan will be officiating, but did Ruby herself ever see the Riott Squad end up like this? Ruby says that people make and break promises on a daily basis. They show themselves to be loyal then disloyal in a single breath. The only person Ruby cares about now his Ruby. And in the Elimination Chamber, Ruby will prove she can strike whenever she pleases. And the WWE Universe will realize there are no friends inside the Chamber.

Liv Morgan VS Ruby Riott, Special Guest Referee: Sarah Logan!

Ruby rushes Liv and tackles her to a corner! Sarah counts but Liv turns things around to fire off forearms. Sarah counts again and Liv lets up. Ruby slips out but Liv goes up and up and missile dropkicks! Liv runs corner to corner for a back body press, then she throws Ruby down on the mat. Cover, TWO! Sarah has a fair count but Liv grabs Ruby’s hair. Sarah reprimands so Liv wrenches the arm to wrangle Ruby down. Ruby endures and works her way to ropes. Sarah calls for the ropebreak but Liv waits until 4. Liv runs at Ruby but Ruby pushes her into the post! And SUPERKICKS! Sarah reprimands Ruby but Ruby kicks Liv while she’s down!

Ruby snarls while working out the bad arm. She drags Liv up and Sarah reprimands the hair grabbing. Ruby shifts to a cravat and cranks on the neck. Liv endures but refuses to give in. Ruby leans on Liv and says this is Liv’s own doing. Liv works her way up and throws body shots. Ruby knees Liv down hard! Ruby puts Liv in a corner to stomp and stomp but Sarah counts. They argue and Ruby throws forearms again. Sarah backs Ruby off and reminds Ruby she’s the referee for this match. Ruby goes at Liv, Liv slips around and rolls Ruby up, TWO! Ruby swings, misses and Liv throws big forearms! Liv has Ruby on the ropes but lets up to run. Ruby spins Liv around for a Complete Shot! Cover, TWO! And Ruby ends up bumping into Sarah!

Sarah keeps her cool as Ruby clobbers Liv from behind! Ruby covers, Sarah counts, TWO! Ruby thinks Sarah is being biased but Sarah says Ruby knocked into her. They argue, and Ruby shoves Sarah! Liv rolls Ruby up, Sarah counts FAST! Liv wins!!

Winner: Liv Morgan, by pinfall

The Riott leader has only made enemies of her friends, and now Sarah shoves her down! Liv enziguris Ruby! But then Sarah KNEES Liv! Ruby was right about one thing: The Elimination Chamber leaves no room for friends. Will a member of the former Squad come out as #1 Contender to Becky Lynch’s Raw Women’s Championship?

No Way Jose and his conga line are backstage!

But they encounter Erick Rowan. Why all the mystery on his pet? Can’t they just see what’s in it? They want to see? Yeah! Well he’s been waiting for someone to finally ask nicely. Rowan will do Jose and his amigos a favor, and show them the pet. Rowan pulls the tarp up, opens the door and brings out… a SPIDER!! “Don’t you want to see my friend?!” Everyone runs away from Rowan’s eight legged little friend and Rowan puts him back in the cage. Now that we know what is in the cage, there’s one more question we must ask: What is it’s name?

Kairi Sane w/ Asuka VS Shayna Baszler!

While the Empress of Tomorrow will meet the Riott Squad, the Queen of Harts and the Queen of Spades in the Elimination Chamber, the Pirate Princess revives a rivalry from her days in NXT! Will Kairi represent the Kabuki Warriors well against the bloodthirsty Baszler?

Before the match, Kairi and Asuka grab mics to give introductions. “Shayna, Shayna, Shayna. You are lucky tonight!” Asuka’s wrist is keeping her from competing tonight, which is upsetting. But Kairi says “I got this!” So at Elimination Chamber, Asuka promises to take out all her opponents, and get one more chance at Becky at WrestleMania! Kairi laughs and Asuka says she’s hungry for Baszler! But speaking of, Baszler makes her entrance and this NXT revisit begins!

Shayna and Kairi circle around the ring. Kairi teases Shayna then goes after a leg but Shayna throws her off. Kairi gets up and circles with Shayna again, and the two feel out the approach. Shayna kicks, Kairi gets under and waistlocks. Shayna grabs the arm to torture the wrist but Kairi gets ropes. The ref reprimands as Shayna keeps on Kairi, but then Shayna sweeps the legs to sit Kairi down. Asuka protests but Shayna says she can’t do anything with the bad wrist. Kairi does something and SLAPS Shayna! Kairi then redirects Shayna, goes up and around to headscissor! And then Kairi sweeps Shayna’s legs to give it back. Kairi says kiss this and then runs. Shayna catches the Sliding D to get a Kimura! Kairi rolls Shayna, TWO!

Shayna scoops Kairi but Kairi slips out to waistlock. Shayna standing switches and shoves but Kairi dodges. Kairi comes back to get a SPINE BUSTER! Asuka coaches Kairi up but Shayna scowls as she stomps and stomps and stomps the leg! Asuka protests more and coaches Kairi up. Shayna smirks as she stalks Kairi. Kairi throws shots but they don’t do enough. Shayna kicks at Kairi’s leg then grabs it for a leg DDT! Shayna watches Kairi writhe but Kairi eggs Shayna on. Kairi swings hands but Shayna grabs the arm to whip Kairi into the post! Shayna kicks the bad leg! Shayna stares Asuka down as Kairi bails out. Fans boo as Shayna dusts her hands off and a ring count begins.

Kairi forces herself to stand at 4 and climbs into the ring at 6. Shayna is on her with clubbing forearms. Shayna grabs the leg and twists but Kairi kicks her away. Kairi dumps Shayna over and out to the apron, then runs, only for Shayna to move and KICK back! Shayna covers, TWO! Shayna drags Kairi by her leg and wrenches the knee. Kairi endures the toehold as Shayna bends her leg and twists! Asuka coaches Kairi and she kicks with her free leg. Shayna turns her around and isolates the ankle, to STOMP!! Asuka shouts and yells at Shayna, but Kairi rolls Shayna up again! ONE, Shayna ROUNDHOUSES Kairi down! Shayna covers, TWO! Kairi refuses to stop, and here comes Becky!

The Man swaggers around with sunglasses and fur coat as she holds up the Raw Women’s Championship. Shayna throws Kairi out so she can stare Becky down while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns as Kairi throws double CHOPS on Shayna! Then she palm strikes from all sides! Shayna shoves and body shots Kairi back, then drags her into a suplex. Kairi fights and DDT’s Shayna down! Becky is on commentary and wears Jerry Lawler’s crown as she watches Shayna stir Kairi and Shayna slowly stand and Shayna throws haymakers. Kairi gives them back and we have a brawl! Shayna kicks the bad leg and then goes to buzzsaw, but Kairi blocks! Kairi trips Shayna then runs to BLOCKBUSTER! Kairi fires up as Shayna goes to the corner and fans fire up as she marches the plank. The Pirate Prince runs corner to corner to hit the SLIDING D!

Asuka and Brooklyn cheer as Kairi climbs up top. Shayna knows what’s coming and kicks Kairi’s legs out! Shayna climbs up top and clubs away on Kairi’s back. Kairi resists but Shayna gets the GUT WRENCH SUPERPLEX! Cover, TWO!! Shayna is annoyed but she drags Kairi back up. She gives Kairi toying kicks and then harder strikes. She runs but Kairi SPEARS her down! Kairi heads up top again, takes aim and weighs anchor, for the InSANE Elbow! Into BOOTS! Shayna locks on the Kirafuda Klutch! Kairi taps, Shayna wins!

Winner: Shayna Baszler, by submission

Becky isn’t surprised, but she also talks some smack. The Man holds up her title and says she’ll still be holding it. Shayna sends a message by putting Kairi back into the Klutch! Shayna throws Kairi down again and Becky dares Shayna to try that with her. Will both women get their wish and have a WrestleMania showdown on the horizon?

Angel Garza & Andrade Almas w/ Zelina Vega VS Humberto Carrillo & Rey Mysterio!

There is blood between these four men. Bad blood, that is. Who wins this incredible lucha libre battle for the ages?

Raw returns from single picture as El Latino makes his entrance. From the entrances, La Muneca is back by El Idolo’s side, but will Garza keep from taking that personally? The teams sort out and Carrillo starts with Almas. The bell rings and Carrillo goes right at the WWE United States Champion with fast hands! They brawl and Carrillo CHOPS! And CHOPS! And whips! Almas bails out to catch his breath and regroup with Garza. Carrillo runs but Garza helps Almas get clear, only for Carrillo to handspring back. Mysterio LEAPS at Garza, but gets caught! Garza swings Mysterio into barriers! Almas RAMS Carrillo into barriers on the other end, then CHOP him back!

Almas puts Carrillo back in and stomps Carrillo all around. Carrillo gets to ropes and Almas fires up. Almas brings Carrillo over and tags in Garza. They double whip and double back drop Carrillo high and hard! Garza keeps on Carrillo with a wristlock and CHOPS in the corner. He sets Carrillo on the second rope to KNEE him in the gut! Garza brings Carrillo over and tags in Almas. They mug Carrillo in the corner and Almas stomps a mudhole in. Vega likes what she sees as Almas CHOPS Carrillo again. Almas mugs Carrillo and then tags Garza in. They double whip Carrillo again but Carrillo kicks back! Garza catches Carrillo and sends him to Almas, but Carrillo headscissors Almas away!

Carrillo back elbows Garza then uses Almas to springboard arm-drag Garza! Carrillo springboard headbutts Almas down! Cover, ONE! Carrillo KICKS Almas down and Vega is annoyed. Carrillo whips but Almas reverses to ROCK and CHOP Carrillo! Almas whips, Carrillo reverses but Almas goes Tranquilo! Fans do like that. Garza then runs in to stop Carrillo short, and starts to undo his pants. Carrillo stops him, shoves him, and takes Garza’s pants off for him! To then throw them up, pop up and over Garza, and dropkick Almas out of Tranquilo! Mysterio springboards to huricanrana Garza down! Carrillo runs to FLY! Direct hit on Almas! Mysterio helps Carrillo get up and in and they have control as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again as Almas gives Carrillo a shoulder breaker. Carrillo forearms Almas and again until he’s free. Fans rally as Carrillo crawls, but Almas stomps him down. Almas brings Carrillo up but Carrillo slips to the apron to ROCK Almas. But Garza uses the apron skirt to trip up Carrillo! Carrillo crashes down and Almas goes out to fetch him. Almas drags Carrillo up and whips him hard into barriers! Almas goes back into the ring, tags to Garza and then sets Carrillo on the apron. Garza runs to PENALTY KICK Carrillo down! Garza goes out to put Carrillo in the ring then cover, TWO! He keeps on Carrillo with an armlock and chinbar.

Carrillo fights up but Garza clubs him into a cobra twist. Carrillo endures and fights his way free to hip toss Garza down! Garza hurries to go after Carrillo but gets a jawbreaker! Carrillo crawls but Garza grabs a foot, to get an enziguri! Hot tags to Almas and Mysterio! Mysterio springboards to seated senton Almas! And headscissors! And springboard Quebrada to the DDT! Cover, TWO!! Mysterio paces as fans rally for him. Almas elbows Mysterio away then whips, but Mysterio kicks back! Carrillo tags in as Mysterio springboards up and back to headscissor Almas. Carrillo dropkicks Almas out then rocks Garza! Ultimo Ninja goes up and LEAPS, but crashes into barriers as Vega helps Almas get away! Raw goes to break as Carrillo is down and out.

Raw returns as Almas crashes ‘n’ burns now. He apparently missed his Woe Stomps, given Carrillo gets out of the Tree of Woe. Hot tags to Garza and Mysterio! Mysterio wheelbarrows to victory roll Garza onto ropes! Mysterio dropkicks Almas back up to then dial it up, but the call is blocked! Garza drags Mysterio to the corner to KNEE in the ribs! Vega is excited as Garza covers, TWO! Garza clubs and clubs Mysterio on the back then puts him up top. Mysterio boots back then leaps, DESTROYER!! Cover, but Almas breaks it! Vega breathes again as Almas drags Garza over. Almas tags in and runs at Mysterio, boot feint to elbow! Fans boo and jeer as Almas drags Mysterio up.

Almas suplexes for uno amigo. Fans boo as he hits dos amigos. Vega grins but Mysterio escapes and Carrillo tags in! Missile dropkick to somersault moonsault! Cover, TWO! Carrillo grows frustrated but he drags Almas into the drop zone. Carrillo climbs up top but Almas trips him up! Almas dumps him down and Vega shouts for the knees. “SI! SI!” and Almas goes corner to corner, CIEN SHADOWS! Cover, but Mysterio breaks it! Garza goes after Mysterio, powerbomb but huricanrana! Mysterio adds Almas on, it’s a party call! 6 1 9!! Mysterio leaps to huricanrana Garza down! Carrillo is up top and aimed at Almas, for a SUPER MOONSAULT! Cover, Mysterio and Carrillo win!!

Winners: Rey Mysterio & Humberto Carrillo, by pinfall

Vega is in shock! El Idolo and El Latino lost under her command! And biggest of all, Carrillo pinned the WWE United States Champion! Does this mean big things for the young star?

Beth Phoenix returns to Raw!

The Glamazon goes to the ring and takes up a mic. “I really appreciate being given this time on Monday Night Raw. I’m here tonight to give a medical update on my husband, Edge.” But before she can, Randy Orton appears! The Viper has already decimated the Rated R Superstar and V1 Matt Hardy, “apologizing” but refusing to explain. Beth glares at Orton as he walks to the ring. Orton wants a hug but she keeps him at arm’s length. He offers a handshake instead. Beth can’t believe he’s even thinking she’d dare do such a thing after what the “son of a bitch” did? Orton paces, and then takes a seat in a corner to let her continue with her news.

Beth says she isn’t really surprised Orton is here. But this is great, because if anyone needs to hear this, it’s him. Beth is here as the wife of Adam Copeland who needs her husband. She is here as a mother of their children because they deserve a father. Maybe there is a possibility- Orton hops down off the corner and starts pacing again. Beth keeps her eyes on him as he gets himself a mic. “I know what you were going to say.” There is not a possibility but a certainty that Edge will never wrestle again. Orton owes Beth an explanation. He says he’ll give her one, but he’s not sure how to put it to words. Orton starts with a “little story.”

Back in the October of 1999, there was a live event in St. Louis, where Orton lives. Cowboy Bob Orton took Randy to meet WWE agents because Randy wanted to “Break into the business.” Backstage, Orton was just a fan despite growing up in the business. To see Austin, HHH, Michaels, Foley and others, that was amazing. But the one to show respect to Bob was Edge. Randy was so proud to be the son of a legend. Edge said Bob was one of the best Heels ever. Bob was one of the reasons Edge was in the business. Bob introduced Randy to Edge, Edge looked at Randy with all the sincerity he could muster as he wished Randy luck in making it to the same level. Randy used that as motivation to go from being insecure to becoming who he is today.

Then Orton and Edge were in main events for the WWE Intercontinental Championship stealing the show ever night. Then Rated RKO became a team and became tag team champions. Just when things were the best they could be, Orton flew too high, hit a rough patch and made some poor life choices. He dug a hole so deep that he should’ve been buried in it. But he wasn’t, because Edge pulled Orton out of it and saved him. Orton realized there’s more to life than wrestling! Orton found a wife, had kids and helped his kids through life! All of that is because Edge saved him! So what Orton was doing was returning the favor by saving Edge.

At the Royal Rumble, the fans were just SO excited to have Edge back, even Orton had goosebumps. It was an amazing feeling, but then Edge came back the next night. Edge thought he was back for good. Edge thought he was going to be full-time again. Orton knew better. Someone was going to make a name for themselves off Edge, and they were going to ruin Edge’s life. Orton says he was doing Edge’s family a favor. Orton wanted Beth to have her husband. He wanted their daughters to have their father home. How are they doing, by the way? Because thanks to Orton, Edge can go on hikes, ride bikes and take them to things. Orton did it out of love for Edge, Beth and their daughters!

Beth is getting emotional, but Orton points out the sad truth: “Everybody blames me for what I did.” They think Orton is selfish, but Beth knows that it isn’t that at all. The one to blame is BETH. She’s an enabler! If Edge was a drug addict, she wouldn’t give him those drugs. If Edge was an alcoholic, she wouldn’t give him a beer. But Edge is a junkie for the CHEERS! And Beth did NOTHING to stop him! Orton had to step in as a brother and did what he did so that Edge could be Adam Copeland! Fans are divided and Beth is conflicted. But Orton says that putting it into words, he realizes something. Orton loves Beth’s family more than Beth ever could! What?! Now fans are a bit upset with Orton, but “the truth hurts, don’t it?”

Beth glares at Orton and SLAPS him! Orton keeps his cool, turns back around, and stares Beth in the eye. Beth doesn’t back down, he calls her a “b*tch” and she kicks low! Orton RKO’s Beth Phoenix!! And then storms off. Referees rush out to check out on her and fans are speechless. The Viper crosses yet another line, but will he ever face the consequences? Natalya, Rey Mysterio, R-Truth, Zack Ryder, Curt Hawkins and even D-Von come out to check on a long time friend. Is the Glamazon going to be okay? Not just physically, but emotionally?

My Thoughts:

For Super Showdown not being the best, this Raw was pretty great! And that’s considering it had to go right into go-home mode at the same time. For one, Heyman gives another good promo, and McIntyre just decimates Lesnar! We’re still far out from WrestleMania so this shouldn’t affect McIntyre’s math. We need him to dethrone Lesnar in an epic showdown or it’s all for naught. Then the Raw Tag Team Championship match was great, much more worthy of a PPV. It’s so great for Ford & Dawkins to have the titles, but I really hope they aren’t just giving those right back to Rollins and Murphy at Elimination Chamber.

I do not get what Vince is doing to Ricochet. Lesnar squashing him easily was unfair but logical. Ricochet not beating Riddick Moss for the 24/7 Championship is just awful. For a title that has given fans a lot of laughs, and is now making a serious turn, why not give it to a seriously amazing wrestler? If Ricochet could shock the world leaping out of the ring and to the floor with ease, imagine what he could do as he runs around with this title just to avoid being rolled up!? VINCE!! Also, I was hoping Ricochet would reunite with Aleister in a more organic method than the Dusty Rhodes Classic and Vince’s lack of ideas. Aleister went through an OC gauntlet, but will now have a No DQ match with Styles. I hope Ricochet helps keep Gallows & Anderson out of it to give us that reunion.

I actually really liked how the Riott Squad segment went tonight. Sarah was trying to keep the peace during last week’s contract signing and tried again in the match, but of course the tension and such got to her, too. Liv getting the win tonight and then Sarah immediately turning on her was all good, and their segment in the Chamber match will be good all on its own. Sadly, we didn’t get quite the same build out of Shayna, Kairi, Asuka and Becky. Only Vince could ruin this rematch. The story beats were here, but not at all paced the way it should have been. Obviously Shayna was going to win, like she will on Sunday, but I don’t think it helped anyone. Becky doing her best Tyson Fury meets Conor McGregor was odd, too. Since when has The Man been flashy like this? VINCE!!

Thankfully, the last match and the last segment made up for a lot of that. The tag match was incredible! It was just so fast moving and rich with story, and how great for Carrillo to get the pin? I wish we were getting a United States Championship match for the Chamber, but there’s still Mania, obviously. If you put these four in a match together where now it’s every man for himself, maybe even add ladders, and the US Championship could steal the show. And of course, the closing segment with Beth and Orton was powerful. I think Orton got real cheers. But of course, we all knew an RKO was coming at some point. We never got the medical update, so I’m thinking maybe we get that next week, and it’s revealed Edge CAN wrestle, and is coming for revenge!

My Score: 8.5/10

Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!

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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (3/20/23)

Monday is ImPAULsive!

Published

2 hours ago

March 20, 2023

Steven Mitchell

The Road to WrestleMania gets even bigger!

On the same night Roman Reigns returns to Raw, Logan Paul hosts a special edition of his talk show, with The Miz as special guest!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

Austin Theory VS Montez Ford; Theory wins.
Omos w/ MVP VS Mustafa Ali; Omos wins.
Dominik Mysterio w/ Damian Priest VS Johnny Gargano w/ Dexter Lumis; Dom wins.
Bayley w/ Damage CTRL VS Rhea Ripley; Rhea wins.
Chad Gable w/ Otis VS Ricochet w/ Braun Strowman; wins.
Chelsea Green & Piper Niven VS Asuka & Bianca Belair; win.

PLAY BY PLAY

Kevin Owens is here!

The fans fire up as the Prizefighter heads to the ring, but it turns out, he’s not alone! SAMI ZAYN is here, too! The best frenemies reunited on SmackDown, so they’re rolling together here on Raw! Fans sing Sami’s song and then cheer for “SAMI! SAMI!” Kevin says, “I think they like you.” Fans then chant for “KO! KO!” Sami says, “Sounds like they like you, too, pal.” Kevin appreciates them cheering, and Sami says it feels really, really, really good to come out here on the same page with Kevin again. And he didn’t get a chance to say this last week, but Sami says he gets it.

After Elimination Chamber, for weeks Sami came up to Kevin, talking about not being friends and working together, he had it wrong. He thought of it as a business transaction, and that’s not how they’ve done this. They’ve needed each other their whole careers, whether as friends or enemies, they’ve always used each other to get to the next level, and they did it as brothers. Kevin says Sami is right about that, but here’s something Sami might not understand. For 20 years, Kevin’s been Sami’s biggest fan. Whether fighting each other or fighting alongside each other, Kevin’s been Sami’s biggest fan. Whenever he would be asked who is the best wrestler he’s been in the ring with, he’d say Sami Zayn.

So for the last six months, it was frustrating to see Sami in the Bloodline, being held under Roman’ Reigns’ thumb, when the truth is, Sami is better than all of them! He outgrew the Bloodline right away! Kevin knew it, the Bloodline knew it, and the FANS knew it! Kevin couldn’t take seeing Sami stay under Roman. But Sami got through to Kevin, and Kevin realized it was time to get over that and take down the Bloodline together. Sami says they both know what comes next. They look to the WrestleMania sign! And here come the Usos! Jimmy & Jey glare right at Sami & Kevin, and they have mics of their own to speak their minds.

Fans boo but Jey says, “Look at ’em! You see what I see?” Jimmy sees ’em, Uce. That right there is a backstabber! Sami, what you whispering about? Kevin’s Sami’s biggest fan, they like you, too! You two are just gonna backstab each other! They’re the kind of family that cuts at each other’s throats! Sami says they’re gonna talk about family with cutthroats and backstabbers, we all know it is Jey’s dream to get back at Roman Reigns! Jimmy says Sami’s the only one dreaming! Wake up! The two of them staring at the Mania sign like something’s gonna happen there. Nothing’s gonna happen there. NOTHING!

Kevin says let’s just cut to the chase. We all know where this is going, what they’re thinking. And by the sound of it, the fans are thinking the same thing! There’s only one way to settle this, and only one place to do it: The Grandest Stage of Them All! Jimmy & Jey as brothers VS these brothers, Kevin & Sami, for the Undisputed Tag Team titles at WrestleMania! Fans chant “YES! YES! YES!” Jimmy says the Usos are the greatest team in the world! Kevin & Sami don’t deserve anything! They’ve been on the same page for three minutes. The Usos have been down since day one! There won’t be a title match at WrestleMania!

Jey says, “To be honest, though… This might be our one shot to put this, uh, Sami Zayn & Kevin Owens problem in the dirt. So yeah! Brother VS Brother at WrestleMania! WE ACCEPT!” In fact, why wait? The Usos rush the ring and the brawl is on! Kevin has Jimmy. Jey has Sami, but Jimmy POSTS Kevin and Sami TOSSES Jey! Jimmy then runs in to TOSS Sami! Sami throws hands, the Usos mug Sami, but Kevin CLOBBERS Jimmy into the timekeeper’s area! Now the Canadians mug Jey! They put Jey in the ring, Jey runs, into a SUPERKICK! And then Sami sets up, HELLUVA- NO, Jimmy bails Jey out!

Fans boo but the Usos regroup and grab chairs! But refs rush out, and a SUV pulls up backstage. The rest of the Bloodline arrives! Solo Sikoa & Paul Heyman get the door for the Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns! Kevin & Sami dare the Usos to do something, but the Usos retreat to regroup with the Bloodline. But the match is made all the same! Will the Bloodline stand or crumble in Hollywood?

Austin Theory VS Montez Ford!

The Now United States Champion didn’t like all the jokes made at his expense, and he took it out on Angelo Dawkins. But will he be able to do the same to the other half of the Profits? Or will A-Town go down this close to WrestleMania?

Raw returns and Ford makes his entrance. Dawkins sees him out to the ramp then falls back, as Ford did for Dawkins last week. The bell rings and Theory circles with Ford. Fans chant, “We Want The Smoke!” Ford and Theory tie up, Theory headlocks, but Ford powers up. Theory holds on tight, but Ford tries again. Ford gets free, but Theory runs him over! Theory does the running man then says, “All Day.” Fans boo but Theory talks trash on Ford. Ford ties up with Theory, headlocks back, but Theory powers out. Ford leaps over Theory, then CLOBBERS him! Fans fire up while Theory is dazed. Ford says, “You Can’t See Me!”

Ford stalks Theory, but Theory throws body shots and haymakers! Theory CHOKES Ford on the ropes! The ref counts, Theory lets off, but Theory storms up to bump Ford off buckles. Theory stomps away on Ford, the ref counts, but Theory lets off at 4. Fans boo but Theory soaks it all up. Theory then brings Ford up, but Ford turns things around and gives all those stomps back! Theory dodges the haymaker to kick and whip, but Ford reverses and follows to LARIAT! Theory stands, Ford clotheslines Theory up and out! Fans fire up, and Ford TOSSES Theory over the barriers! Fans fire up more as Ford celebrates with them and Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again and Theory has Ford up top, but Ford fights back with body shots! Ford ROCKS Theory, Theory holds onto ropes to stay up, but Ford CLAWS his face then DECKS him! Ford stands up to CROSSBODY! Both men are down and fans fire up! Theory and Ford stand, Theory storms up but Ford counter punches! And again! Ford rallies with big clotheslines, then he dodges to UPPERCUT! Ford hits a BIG back suplex, to a handspring, “You Can’t See Me!” STANDING MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Theory survives but Ford has the fans behind him. Ford waits on Theory to stand, and then clinches, but Theory elbows free!

Theory brings Ford in, Ford wrenches out and ROCKS Theory! Theory rebounds to BOOT! Ford ENZIGURIS in return! Theory staggers, but he still fireman’s carries! Ford slips free to DDT! Theory bails out and sputters, but Ford kips up to then FLY!! Direct hit at the ramp and St. Louis is thunderous! Ford puts Theory back in, climbs up the corner, and FROM THE HEAVEN- NO, Ford has to roll through as Theory moves! Somersault SHOTGUN! Theory calls his shot, fireman’s carries, A-TOWN DOWN!! Cover, Theory wins!

Winner: Austin Theory, by pinfall

One miscalculation from Ford and Theory pulls out the victory! But as close as this was, will Theory find himself struggling against the living legend that is John Cena?

Theory gets the mic to say, “He didn’t believe in me, and now he does. And John, you don’t believe in me. But at WrestleMania, you will!” Theory points to the sign, will WrestleMania belong to The Now?

The Bloodline regroups in the private suite.

The Usos sit with Roman, and he says that wasn’t the best start to the night. Are they good? They’re good. Well, it looked like they took a beating. Well, yeah, a few shots. But y’know what? Nothing can hurt Jimmy or hit him harder than being torn away from his brother. Nothing! And then having to sit here and answer to it like it’s his fault! Is Jimmy standing up to Roman? “I will never forgive Sami Zayn for this.” At Mania, the Usos got him. Roman sure hopes so. He really does. “Wise Man!” “Yes, My Tribal Chief?” “Bring me Adam Pearce.” “Yes, My Tribal Chief.” Heyman heads out, as do Jimmy and Solo, but Roman tells Jey to stay.

Jey sits closer with Roman now, but what will the Tribal Chief have to say to him?

Raw returns as Roman and Jey continue to sit.

Roman says, “It’s been a minute. Haven’t seen you. Haven’t heard from you. I got to beg your brother to get some answers. And now you’re back, making decisions. In order to make decisions, you gotta be part of the Bloodline. Are you with us? Are you Bloodline? Are you still my family?” Jey says he is with Roman. He is Bloodline, Uce. The two look at each other, eye to eye, and Roman says, “I hope so. So I’ma let you do you. I’ll see you later.” Jey nods and goes to stand up, but then Roman puts a hand on his knee. “I love you.” Jey goes, and Heyman returns. “My Tribal Chief.” “Yes, Wise Man?” “Did you find out the answers you were looking for?” Roman says yes.

BREAKING NEWS for WrestleMania!

As first announced on SmackDown, there will be two Fatal 4 Way Tag Team showcase matches! While the women’s division is competing for their spots, the four men’s teams are decided! The Street Profits VS The Viking Raiders VS The Alpha Academy VS Braun Strowman & Ricochet!

Backstage interview with Adam Pearce.

Byron Saxton is with the WWE Official, and asks for some insight about this showcase matches. Yes, this is a great opportunity to showcase the best tag teams in the men’s and women’s divisions, and- Chelsea Green asks to talk to the manager. Hi, Chelsea, it’s him, Pearce. Then Chelsea wants him to know that she just made matching gear for herself and her tag team partner, Carmella, but Carmella isn’t available tonight! Yes, he knows, so- So he’ll have no problem to agreeing to this new tag partner she found, someone who has no love lost for Bianca Belair and Asuka. In comes Piper Niven!

Chelsea introduces Piper, and says she will help Chelsea destroy the competition. Talk to whoever you have to in order to make this official. For what feels like the thousandth time, Pearce is the one. He is the general manager, he makes things official, and he- Well if he’s so official, then go ahead and make it official that these two are in the Women’s Fatal 4 Way Showcase! That’s what he was in the middle of doing! Oh! Finalizing? Do you know who she is?! She is Chelsea green, she is a star, and you do not want to make her angry. Don’t make her go on social media and at WWE to put her on blast. Or worse, walk him! Put her in! ‘Kay, bye.

Pearce sighs, but at the very least, Chelsea and Piper are going to see if they’re a worthy duo against the EST and the Empress of Tomorrow.

It’s a tale of the tape!

“WrestleMania has played host to some of the biggest collisions in WWE history. And this year, two titans are set for a colossal showdown.” Brock Lesnar has used his natural physical gifts for roughly 20 years. He is 6’3″ and 285 pounds, with a wingspan of 81 inches, Lesnar has the ultimate tools to deliver suplexes and the F5. So it is no surprise that he has achieved so many accolades: seven-time WWE Champion, three-time Universal Champion, two-time Royal Rumble winner. He even dominated the octagon to become UFC Heavyweight Champion. It is clear that Lesnar is capable of decimating anyone he’s faced.

But he’s never faced someone like Omos. The Nigerian Giant’s sheer size made him a spectacle upon arrival. 7’3″, 416 pounds, making him dwarf even Khali, Kane and the Undertaker. The 87 inch reach gives him a foot of advantage over the average boxer, and his 14.5 inch hands are twice the size of a normal man’s. Omos has already cemented himself as a force of nature in the WWE. These two have all the components to overwhelm the ordinary competitor, but they’re both far from ordinary. This will be a battle unlike any other, on the only stage big enough to contain them!

Omos w/ MVP VS Mustafa Ali!

If that tale of the tape wasn’t enough for you, then prepare to see the Nigerian Giant in action! Will the Beacon be broken this close to WrestleMania?

The bell rings and Ali tries to reason with Omos. Ali believes in positivity now, and he will win with a smile on his face. Omos SHOVES Ali all the way to the corner! Omos talks trash on Ali, then CLOBBERS him! Ali flounders and Omos roars. Dolph Ziggler is watching backstage, he is not impressed by Ali’s overenthusiasm. Omos drags Ali up to MOUNTAINTOP SLAM!! Cover, Omos wins!

Winner: Omos, by pinfall

MVP gets the mic and says the Nigerian Giant fears no man, animal or beast. But Brock Lesnar will learn to fear the Nigerian Giant at WrestleMania! But will The Beast be able able to build Suplex City on the huge foundation that is this mountain?

Security knocks on Logan Paul’s door.

Logan Paul and his entourage head out, and Miz walks over for a handshake. Miz was hoping to go over the questions for tonight, since Logan will surely want have him, this year’s host of WrestleMania, as his guest on ImPAULsive TV tonight. Yeah, no, hard pass. Logan leaves Miz hanging and heads to gorilla, but will he regret showing up on Raw tonight?

Logan Paul heads to the ring.

Fans are torn as “the Maverick” is ready to host the Raw debut of his talk show. “EY YOOO, ST. LOUIS~! Ladies and gentlemen, let’s get a little ImPAULsive, shall we?” Logan knows last week, Seth Rollins said that the fans don’t want Logan here. Well too bad because tonight, you’re in HIS house! ImPAULsive TV, baby! Boo all you want, but here’s the reality, y’all. He doesn’t have to be here. He doesn’t. He’s made his millions off his name and his brands, but he’s here because he loves it. He hears you, and sadly, y’all don’t love him. Maybe two people do: his dad, who he dragged to St. Louis, and that kid who had the “Drink Prime” sign. Much love, kid.

But the rest of y’all, no matter how many times he gets on the mic for their entertainment, no matter how many of these “superstars” he beats up, the fans will never respect him. But guess what? He doesn’t care! It isn’t his fault you DORKS refuse to see the amount of talent standing in front of you! Logan is a 360 degree entertainer, there is nothing he can’t do, there is no seat he can’t fill, there is no person on this roster he can’t compete with. Whether you like him or not, yes, he IS that good. That’s why he didn’t invite anyone to be his guest tonight. Because he can do it all! And did you think any of his celebrity friends would come to a place like St. Louis?

“Two words: Get real!” They’d be outta here quicker than the St. Louis Rams! Oh, sorry, the LA Rams! In fact, he’s looking to joining the Rams back in LA when he challenged “your hear,” Seth Rollins, to a match at WrestleMania, April 1st, Logan’s 28th birthday. Happy birthday to himself, he gets to kick some ass. But jokes aside, the match will be great. Rollins is top three in the business. But Logan was talking with his brother, Jake, and Jake made a good point. It is hard to be afraid of a guy named “Seth.” Seths are nice guys. Seth Rogan, Seth Curry, though he’s not as good as Steph Curry, but hey.

And maybe, if Rollins hadn’t started this beef, they could’ve been friends! But now, Logan just wants to see himself knock Rollins out again. Actually, can we do that? Can we get a replay of him knocking Rollins out? It was two weeks ago, Rollins gave Miz a superkick and then Logan hit his One Lucky Punch. Do you guys like Rollins? Let’s see that again. Oh, so good! Rollins looked so dumb. Okay, one more time! Put some production value on it. BOP! SMACK! WHAM! Beautiful! Like watching Picasso paint. Logan could see that all day! But then Logan’s mic gets cut? Logan isn’t sure what’s going on here. Did the production team not get the mics right?

Fans cheer that Logan can’t be heard, but he just trades mic. But wait! Rollins is in the production truck! He “apologizes” to “Mr. Paul” about that. He isn’t sure what’s wrong. Logan’s audio isn’t working, the video isn’t working. What could the problem be? HAHAHAHAHAHA! Now the real question, Logan, is how on Earth are we gonna save this terribly awful episode of ImPAULsive TV? Any ideas? OH! Rollins has one. HAHAHAHAHA! “BURN IT DOWN~!” See you soon, Logan! HAHAHAHA! Rollins struts all the way from the truck to gorilla, in a leopard print outfit, too. Logan mocks the fans singing as tone deaf.

Rollins heads to the ring and fans sing more, “OH~ OHH~ OHHHH~!” Logan says St. Louis can’t keep a football team and they can’t keep a tune. And Rollins’ outfit is stupid. Rollins stands with Logan in the ring as fans sing, has the mic, but then TACKLES Logan! The two brawl, spill out of the ring, and Rollins throws hands! Refs rush in, as does Adam Pearce! Fans want to “LET THEM FIGHT!” and the two get loose! They COLLIDE, and then Rollins TACKLES Logan over the announce desk! Logan scrambles away, but Rollins trips him on the desk!! Logan lands hard, Rollins wants more, but security drags him away!

Rollins rips up Logan’s set, and hurries up the corner! He SUPER CROSSBODIES onto the security! But Logan hits ONE LUCKY PUNCH!! Logan laughs more than Rollins and he takes his leave. Logan says that’s another one, so third time will be the charm. Will Logan get another lucky punch at WrestleMania? Or will Rollins finally burn this “tourist” down?

Dominik Mysterio w/ Damian Priest VS Johnny Gargano w/ Dexter Lumis!

“Ex-Con” Dom keeps pushing his father, Rey, to fight him, but Rey has not caved in. Will the “pathetic, punk-ass kid” take out his frustrations in this match tonight? Or will Johnny Wrestling slap some sense into one smartass before handling another at Stand & Deliver?

The bell rings and the two circle. They tie up, Dom gets around but Gargano wrenches to a wristlock. Gargano avoids the body shot to WRING Dom’s arm, then wrenches it again. Dom headlocks, Gargano powers out, and things speed up. Gargano hurdles, drops and CLOBBERS Dom! Dom flounders but Gargano puts him in a corner. Gargano climbs up to rain down fists! Fans count as Gargano goes WAY past ten! Gargano lets off and fans fire up, but Dom kicks Gargano in the ribs! Dom RAMS into Gargano in the corner, Gargano pushes past, but Dom whips him corner to corner. Dom runs in but Gargano goes up and over to schoolboy KICK!

Dom staggers, Gargano RANAS him out of the ring! Fans fire up, Gargano builds speed and DIVES! Direct hit at the ramp! Fans fire up but Gargano clutches his ribs. Gargano stands, Priest coaches Dom up, but Gargano brings Dom around. Dom RAMS Gargano into steel steps! Dom then RAMS Gargano into the barriers! Fans cheer Gargano on but Dom fireman’s carries to SNAKE EYES! Gargano falls to the mat and Dom soaks up the heat as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Dom taunts Gargano while tearing away the rib tape. Dom drags Gargano up, gives some Latino Heat, then suplexes for Uno Amigo! And then Dos Amigos! Fans boo but Gargano fights the third! Gargano suplexes Dom into buckles! Both men are down and fans rally up for Johnny Wrestling. Gargano stands, he fires hands on Dom, blocks a kick, then spins Dom to CLOBBER him! Gargano rallies with more clotheslines, then he ducks ‘n’ dodges to OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Fans fire up and Dom goes to the apron. Gargano avoids the shoulder to KICK Dom! But Dom HOTSHOTS Gargano!

Dom hurries up to SLINGSHOT- NO, Gargano avoids the senton! SLINGSHOT SPEAR! Cover, TWO! Dom survives but Gargano keeps his focus. Dom wants mercy now? Fans boo and Gargano storms up, but Dom sends him into buckles! Roll up, feet on the ropes! The ref notices in time and calls off the count! Dom argues with the ref, but Gargano SUPERKICKS Dom down! Cover, TWO!! Dom survives and Priest is relieved. Gargano drags Dom up, Dom throws body shots, but Gargano ROCKS Dom with a forearm! Dom ROCKS Gargano back, the forearms go back and forth! Gargano gets the edge, but Dom drop toeholds him!

Fans boo but Dom dials it up, only for Gargano to duck the 619! DISCUS LARIAT! Scoop and LAWN DART! Gargano aims from the corner, SUPERKICK!! Cover, TWO!!! Priest is relieved again but Gargano puts Dom up top. Gargano CHOPS and ROCKS Dom, then climbs up after him. Gargano CHOPS away on Dom, then stands him up. Dom throws body shots in return just as furious! Dom CLUBS away on Gargano, then SUPER GOURD BUSTERS! Dom adjusts to FROG SPLASH onto Gargano’s back! Cover, DOM WINS!

Winner: Dominik Mysterio, by pinfall

Priest celebrates with Dom, and Dom pulls it out on an NXT Triple Crown winner! But Dom isn’t done, as he gets the mic. Fans boo, but Dom says, “Last Friday night on SmackDown, my good for nothing father denied my challenge once again to a match at WrestleMania. But you know what, Jefe? I’m not gonna stop until I get what I want. And at the end of the day, I know that this Friday night on SmackDown in las Vegas, the entire Mysterio family will be there live. So I believe that’s the same family that blocked my number, kicked me outta the group chat, and wanted nothing to do with me. But that’s okay, because the Judgment Day group chat is much better.

“But I think I figured out a way to get you to accept my match, and that’s gonna be when I say hi to mom and ask for her permission for you to face me at WrestleMania. That’s if you have the balls to get them out of her purse.” Dom insults his father, but will he regret dragging the rest of the family into this?

The Usos and Solo talk backstage.

Then Heyman walks over and asks if they’re waiting on the Tribal Chief. Because he’s waiting on them to go to the jet. The seafood has been delivered. Shrimp, lobster, mahi mahi. Roman is so proud of all of them, they can take the rest of the night off and indulge. So they can go eat? Okay! Wait, not Solo. Roman needs to talk with Solo. Solo walks back into the suite with Heyman, and Jey says aight. No mahi mahi for Solo. Will the Usos not be needed for what Roman has planned later tonight?

Edge speaks.

“If you push me, I will not just resist. I will throw you through a wall. Finn, I am a hostile man. I keep it caged so I can be the man I’ve become so I can function in society. But inside the cage… Well, that’s caged no more. I won’t apologize for it, I won’t fight it, I will lean into it, I will revel in it, I will savor it. Finn, you have no idea what I’m capable of inside Hell in a Cell, you have no idea what goes through your soul when that steel door slams shut behind you. But I do. I’ve been baptized inside the cell by the Deadman himself! The cell has become my one friend, my partner, my cathedral of pain. It rewards me for the streak that runs through me.

“You cannot become what you need to become by remaining what you are. Finn, you and I are two men who clearly understand that, so I grasped what you meant when you said that Hell couldn’t handle your demons.” Edge laughs, and says, “The scriptures, they say, ‘Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil!’ Well, I never have. Because I’m the evil in the valley. So leave Finn at home. Bring your demon… To meet the devil. He’d like to meet him.” Edge has a sinister smile, what will happen when the Rated R Superstar and the Prince unleash it all in one final battle?

Rhea Ripley heads to the ring.

Judgment Day is coming for WrestleMania, and that includes the Eradicator going after the SmackDown Women’s Championship. Rhea gets the mic and has the music cut. Fans rally for “MAMI! MAMI!” and Rhea is amused. “Last Friday, Charlotte, she said that I needed to be a champion. She said that I needed to be a star. And y’know, I actually agree with those statements. But the one thing I don’t agree with is living in the past. Charlotte doesn’t wanna accept her future, and that is why she keeps talking about what happened three years ago at my first WrestleMania, when we stepped into the ring one-on-one for the first time.

“Back when I was trying to make a name for myself and earn respect. Now Charlotte, she thinks that she’s the leader of the Women’s Division. But leaders, they actually respect others. And Charlotte, after that match, I knew that you didn’t respect anyone. I knew that you didn’t respect me. And to be honest, I don’t think that you ever will. Because I make you question the respect you have for yourself. When you hear the name ‘Rhea Ripley,’ you question everything. Don’t ‘What’ me, you’re all pathetic.” Fans boo but Rhea smiles. Rhea says that she brings out all the deepest insecurities that Charlotte tries to mask as confidence.

Rhea says that Charlotte knows that every single time they’ve gone to war, Rhea’s gotten up and kept going, because that is what she does. And what Charlotte does is try to keep people down. But not her! Charlotte, you have to admit that it is time. “You’re done! You’re washed. It’s over. It’s over and you have to go home, where you mean absolutely nothing. Because without the WWE, you are nothing.” Fans boo but Rhea says she doesn’t care about Charlotte’s insecurities, or if she respects Rhea. “Because at WrestleMania, I will become a champion, and I will be the biggest star here in the WWE!”

“And Charlotte~… My little Charlotte, when you see me holding your crown above your head… You’re gonna know that all your insecurities are true. I don’t need you to respect me. But you will fear me.” Wait, Damage Control is coming out here now? Bayley tells Rhea, “Earlier, when you were talking about leaders, I was waiting for you to mention my name. Because, Rhea, I do respect you. We all respect you! Anyone that puts Charlotte Flair in her place has the utmost respect from Damage Control. But um, if you needed any tips on how to beat Charlotte, you could’ve just asked your Role Model, because I did beat Charlotte in my first WrestleMania.

“And I’m pretty sure you saw what we did to Trish Stratus! We-” Rhea cuts Bayley off there and says she doesn’t need any help from them. Well, Bayley thought Rhea might say that. Because Rhea has gotten so cocky! Rhea this, Rhea that, everyone is talking about Rhea dominating the roster! Well guess what/ Raw is THEIR show, so DMG CTRL will show her what Bayley means. Rhea laughs. This is HER show? Mate, Rhea isn’t ring ready, but if one of them wants to get her out of her ring, go ahead. Um, well, ding dong, guess Bayley will be the one, since she’s dressed. Then bring it.

Pearce is backstage, he tells the ref to make this official now. The ref rushes out, Bayley VS Rhea is ready to go, after the break!

Bayley w/ Damage CTRL VS Rhea Ripley!

Raw returns and the bell rings for this match to begin. Rhea and Bayley circle, tie up, and Bayley waistlocks. Bayley ducks the elbow, gets a leg, but Rhea gut wrenches! Bayley fights free, goes after an arm, but Rhea shoves her away. Bayley shoves Rhea, and she says, “You think you’re so strong and cool, huh?!” But Rhea shoves back! Bayley pie faces Rhea, but Rhea just gets mad! Bayley wants her to take it easy but Rhea fires off in the corner! Rhea whips corner to corner, Bayley hits buckles hard, then Rhea runs in and fires off more forearms! Rhea whips Bayley into the corner again, runs in, but is put on the apron.

Bayley ROCKS Rhea and HOTSHOTS her! Kai & Sky fire up as Bayley runs side to side to SHOTGUN Rhea off the apron! Rhea staggers, Bayley runs in, but Rhea blocks the daredevil dropkick! Rhea shoves Bayley away, but Bayley grabs an arm to YANK Rhea into the post! Rhea staggers, Bayley storms up, but Rhea SHOVES her into barriers! Rhea goes up, and she CANNONBALLS onto Bayley! Kai & Sky back off, Rhea puts Bayley in the ring, and Rhea pushes Bayley to a cover, TWO! Rhea stalks Bayley, CLUBS her on the back, but Bayley throws body shots. Rhea blocks boots, carriers Bayley out to then RAM her into the corner!

Rhea snapmares, and KAMI-GOYES!! Cover, TWO!?! Bayley survives and Rhea is annoyed, but Rhea drags Bayley up to whip her to ropes. Rhea ROCKS Bayley in the back! Rhea dusts herself off and says this is HER ring. Rhea shoves and CLUBS Bayley again! Bayley staggers, Rhea whips her again, but Bayley ROCKS Rhea back! Bayley CHOPS away on Rhea, puts Rhea in a corner, then runs in, only for Rhea to catch her! Atomic FACEBUSTER! Rhea runs, stomps, and then drags Bayley up. Bayley fights the pump handle, Sky distracts, and Kai claws Rhea’s face! Bayley trips Rhea, high stacks, feet on the ropes! TWO!!

Rhea survives DMG CTRL playing a bit of number games a la Judgment Day, but Bayley hits a SAIDO! Cover, TWO! Wait, here comes Becky Lynch! The Man leads the legendary Lita and Trish Stratus out, with a HUGE bag of popcorn between the three of them. Is the Big Time trio just here to watch the show? We’ll see, after the break.

Raw returns again and Bayle waits on Rhea to rise. Rhea stands, Bayley reels her in, BAYLEY2BELLY!! Cover, ONE?!?! Rhea shocks Bayley and even Becky is surprised. Bayley huffs and puffs and reels Rhea back in, another BAYLEY2BELLY!! And then a short arm- NO, Rhea dodges to atomic FACEBUSTER! But Bayley avoids the basement dropkick! Bayley runs to REGAL KNEE! Rhea is dazed, Kai & Sky fire up, and Becky keeps munching popcorn. Fans cheer Becky but Bayley drags Rhea up to fire forearms. Rhea fires them back! The forearms go back and forth, Bayley gets the edge, but Rhea shoves her away.

Bayley avoids the boot, ROCKS Rhea, but Rhea BACK ELBOWS! Fans fire up as both women stagger, and Bayley ELBOWS Rhea in the corner! Bayley waits on Rhea, runs back in, SUNSET FLIP- NO, Rhea stays up! Rhea drags Bayley right up, BOOTS her right down, and then has a wild look in her eyes! Rhea drags Bayley by the legs, into the PRISM TRAP!! Bayley endures the inverted cloverleaf, reaches out for Kai & Sky, ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Rhea lets go at 4, and Bayley bails out. Rhea drags Kai up instead! Sky freaks out, but Bayley POSTS Rhea’s head! But here come Becky and the legends!

Kai & Sky brawl with Trish & Lita, but Trish & Lita toss them aside! Becky scares Bayley back into the ring, into a HEADBUTT from Rhea! And then RIPTIDE!! Cover, Rhea wins!

Winner: Rhea Ripley, by pinfall

Becky says that’s too bad for Bayley, it was so close. But Rhea is rolling down the Road to WrestleMania, will she rip the Queen down off her throne?

Chad Gable is looking for Otis.

No one’s seen him, it feels like last week. Wait, Otis is getting a spa day? Coach, this is a manicure. Okay, he has been busy with his modeling, but guess what! Gable got them into the WrestleMania Men’s Fatal 4 Way Tag Team Showcase! Wow, really? Yeah! And tonight, Gable is up against one of their opponents in Ricochet. Ricky? Yes! And Otis knows Braun will be out there, so Gable needs his number one guy! Let’s go! But Maxxine Durpi walks in. Otīse’s mani looks marvelous! And now, she’s scheduled him for a session with one of the world’s greatest hand photographers. She sent some samples and the photographer says he MUST work with Otīse!

Maxxine says this is a pivotal moment for Otise’s career! Gable says the models have a match with the Good Brothers, though. Actually, that was postponed. Unfortunately, Mace overexposed his cheeks during a shoot in Mykonos. None of that make sense. When you’re beautiful, you don’t have to make sense! Gable wouldn’t know since he’s so “horrifically middle class.” Now, Otīse, come along, they’re late for the photag. Otis is torn between his coach and his manager. Otis says, “Coach, let’s ride.” Gable’s happy but Maxxine can’t even. Will the Alpha Academy win big tonight on the road to the showcase?

Chad Gable w/ Otis VS Ricochet w/ Braun Strowman!

Raw returns and “SHOOOOSH~! Shoosh, please.” Gable makes his entrance, his number one guy by his side, though admiring his clean hands and trimmed fingernails. The bell rings and and the circle. Ricochet waistlocks, Gable wrenches out and wristlocks, but Ricochet slips through to wrench and wristlock back. Gable rolls, spins, drop toeholds, and floats to a facelock. Ricochet rolls but Gable rolls with him. Ricochet slips free but Gable gets him again. Ricochet slips free again and backs away, and Gable says, “A Thank Yew!” The two reset, tie up again, and Gable headlocks.

Fans rally, Otis admires his hands, but Gable hits a headlock takeover. Ricochet headscissors, Gable kips free and roles reverse as Ricochet headlocks for the takeover and Gable headscissors. Gable holds on tight, Ricochet rolls and turns Gable over to then slip free and float to a facelock. Gable wrenches to wristlock, whips, but Ricochet reverses. Gable goes up and sunset flips, TWO! Ricochet hurries in, Gable dodges but Ricochet rolls off Gable’s back. Ricochet rolls under, handsprings to headscissor, then he DROPKICKS Gable down! Fans fire up, Ricochet runs in, but into a throat chop! Gable goes up, but Ricochet GAMANGIRIS!

Ricochet UPPERCUTS Gable, climbs up after him, and fires off hands! Ricochet then stands on the very top, to SUPER- NO, Gable blocks the Steiner! Gable brings Ricochet up, fireman’s carries, but Ricochet throws elbows! Gable still lifts Ricochet, and SLAMS him down! Gable then adjusts up top, leaps, FLYING LARIAT! Cover, TWO!! Ricochet survives but Gable is still in control as Raw goes to break.

Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!

AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (3/20/23)

Winnipeg gets Elevated!

Published

3 hours ago

March 20, 2023

Steven Mitchell

The Naturally Limitless ride again!

Dustin Rhodes & Keith Lee continue as a duo in AEW! Will they be rolling through the tag division on Elevation? And what of Swerve’s warning to Keith?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

Skye Blue VS TFA (Taryn From Accounting); Skye wins.
Jake Hager w/ Angelo Parker VS Adam Knight; Hager wins.
Emi Sakura VS Zoe Sager; Sakura wins.
Brandon Cutler VS Jason Geiger; Cutler wins.
Six Man Tag: Matt Hardy, Isiah Kassidy & Ethan Page VS Massive Damage, Mo Jabari & Sebastian Wolfe; Hardy, Kassidy & Ethan win.
Top Flight VS Michael Allen Richard Clark & Shaun Moore; Top Flight wins.
ROH Women’s World Championship Proving Grounds Match: Athena VS Taylor Rising; Athena wins and denies Taylor a title opportunity.
Dustin Rhodes & Keith Lee VS Levi Night & Jessie V; Dustin & Keith win.
Tony Nese & Ari Daivari w/ Mark Sterling VS Alex Reynolds & John Silver; Reynolds & Silver win.

QUICK NOTES

A great line-up, namely in some literally great names showing up. “Massive Damage,” “Taryn From Accounting,” and of course, Michael Allen Richard Clark. M A R C, he’s a MARK! I almost hope some of these names stick around through ROH.

Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!