Money in the Bank: In Your Office!
Six men and six women prepare to climb to corporate ladder! Who reaches the roof, takes down the briefcase, and becomes 2020 Mr. & Ms. MITB?
- Kickoff Show – Jeff Hardy VS Cesaro; Hardy wins.
- SmackDown Tag Team Championship Fatal 4 Way: The New Day VS Lucha House Party VS The Forgotten Sons VS The Miz & John Morrison; The New Day wins and retains the SmackDown Tag Team Championships.
- MVP VS R-Truth; changed to…
- Bobby Lashley VS R-Truth; Lashley wins.
- SmackDown Women’s Championship: Bayley w/ Sasha Banks VS Tamina; Bayley wins and retains the SmackDown Women’s Championship.
- WWE Universal Championship: Braun Strowman VS Bray Wyatt; Strowman wins and retains the WWE Universal Champion.
- WWE World Championship: Drew McIntyre VS Seth Rollins; McIntyre wins and retains the WWE World Championship.
- Money in the Bank Corporate Ladder Match: Otis becomes Mr. MITB, Asuka becomes Ms. MITB.
PLAY BY PLAY
It’s the Money in the Bank Kickoff Show!
Join Scott Stanford and Peter Rosenberg in discussing, analyzing and predicting everything that’s about to happen on the most unique Money in the Bank PPV we’ve ever had!
Renee Young, Booker T and JBL join the show via video!
What are the predictions for the Women’s MITB winner? Booker gives JBL a quick shout out as the soon to be Hall of Famer. That ring is in the mail! But when it comes to these women, Shayna Baszler is a wrecking ball, and she is going to be the one to win that contract. JBL says it is an honor to be with King Bookah and Renee the Queen of Canada. To his pick, JBL was in Japan back in the day, got himself a traditional symbol of honor that is a samurai sword. He is using that as his way of saying Asuka is winning! Renee thinks Lacey Evans is winning because she is hungry for another shot at the SmackDown Women’s Championship.
Backstage interview with The New Day!
The odds may not be in their favor in tonight’s Fatal 4 Way, and the Forgotten Sons could come out of nowhere to win this. Big E says there are more people in this match than Earl Thomas’ Air BNB. The Forgotten Sons may be here but they ain’t scaring Big E and Kofi. This isn’t Texas Chainsaw Massacre, the Nightmare on Elm Street, or Up! Wait, Disney Pixar’s Up? Big E doesn’t like balloons. But what is before us is a challenge, and The New Day don’t run! Whether it’s a regular, a Triple Threat, a Fatal 4 or a Pancake on a Pole, ya bois always gonna come out on top. And why is that? BECAUSE~! New! Day Rocks!
WWE shares Tamina’s video.
The Samoan steamroller has a reputation of “being mean.” But that’s not the case at all. She’s just misunderstood. Tamina tries to play nice but it never seems to work out. Like that time Lana was her manager, or all those other times she beat up someone. Come this Money in the Bank, Tamina is breaking the mold, and Bayley’s jaw, to become the NEW SmackDown Women’s Champion. If you don’t like that, you can go f*BEEEP* But just so you know, there’s nobody meana than Tamina.
Kickoff Show – Jeff Hardy VS Cesaro!
The Charismatic Enigma restarts the comeback, but the Swiss Cyborg wants to stop it before it begins. Will Cesaro end the “good run” before Sheamus even gets a chance to?
The bell rings and Hardy ties up with Cesaro. They go around, Cesaro headlocks but Hardy powers out. Cesaro runs Hardy over and covers, TWO! Cesaro drags Hardy up, headlocks again, but Hardy pries at the hold. Hardy can’t get away before Cesaro drags him down and digs in on the chin. Hardy reverses the headlock to his own, but Cesaro powers up and out. Hardy runs Cesaro over but things speed up. Cesaro goes to hip toss but Hardy reverses with one of his own. Hardy hits a BIG atomic drop, then a full nelson spin to snapmare and neck snap! Cesaro bails out but Hardy goes out the other side. Hardy lines up a shot, runs and uses the steps, to fly! Into Cesaro’s arms! Cesaro TOSSES Hardy into the barriers, then dumps him over! Cesaro leaves Hardy behind and goes to the ring. The ring count climbs past 5 but Hardy gets up. Hardy drags himself up and over the barriers, and gets in the ring at 9.5! But Cesaro stomps away on him at the ropes!
Cesaro digs his heel into Hardy’s head! The ref backs Cesaro off but he drags Hardy up to choke him on the ropes! The ref counts again and Cesaro lets off, to run and body slide! Hardy is down and Cesaro goes up the ropes. Cesaro leaps to elbow Hardy back down! Cover, TWO! Cesaro wraps Hardy up in a half straitjacket, and uses a free hand to smudge the face paint. Hardy endures as Cesaro leans on him, but fights his way up. Cesaro knees Hardy down then whips him corner to corner. Hardy reverses hard and hits a clothesline! Hardy kicks but Cesaro blocks, only to get the spinning back heel! Cesaro staggers about, Hardy dropkicks him off the apron! Hardy pursues, whips, but Cesaro reverses HARD! Hardy goes right into the LED aprons chest first! Cesaro whips Hardy back into the LED to go after those ribs! He puts Hardy back in the ring and climbs up the ropes. Cesaro drops a leg and covers, TWO! Hardy toughs it out but Cesaro looms over him. Cesaro STOMPS Hardy right in the ribs!
Cesaro drags Hardy up and hits a neck snap of his own. Cover, TWO! Cesaro drags Hardy up and throws European Uppercuts. Hardy rebounds to forearm back, but Cesaro gives more EuroUppers! Cesaro drags Hardy up, whips him to ropes, and catches him into a cobra twist! Cesaro stretches Hardy and clubs away on the ribs. He unzips Hardy’s mesh shirt to club him harder. Hardy endures, and hip tosses free! Both men are down but Cesaro is up first to CLOBBER Hardy! Cesaro hammers away with elbows and forearms, then covers, TWO! Hardy refuses to lose, but Cesaro keeps his eyes on Hardy. Hardy flounders but Cesaro drags Hardy up to his feet. Cesaro suplexes high and hard, then covers, TWO! Cesaro grows annoyed with Hardy, and he clamps on with a smothering chinlock. He cranks on Hardy’s neck and adds an arm into the hold.
Hardy endures this modified clutch, fights his way up and fights back with elbows and body shots. Jawbreaker! Cesaro staggers back but Hardy is down. Cesaro comes back with hands but Hardy counter punches! They brawl and Hardy whips. Cesaro reverses but Hardy runs him over! Hardy hits an atomic drop to the leg splitting leg drop! Basement dropkick added on, cover, TWO! Hardy’s back and legs are slowing him down but he gets to his feet. He kicks Cesaro low but no Twist yet! Cesaro shoves free, but walks into an elbow. Hardy goes up, but Cesaro trips him! Cesaro climbs up behind Hardy, clubs him on the back, then brings him into a gut wrench! Hardy resists and elbows free, and down goes Cesaro! Cesaro gets up for WHISPER IN THE WIND! Cover, TWO!! Cesaro survives but both men are down. Cesaro clutches a knee while he sits up. Hardy is on him but Cesaro throws a EuroUpper! And another! And another, but into the backslide! Cover, ONE, and the two roll.
Cesaro gets up, spins Hardy around, but Hardy dodges! Kick, TWIST OF FATE! Cover, TWO!! Cesaro survives again and Hardy can’t believe it! Hardy stands up again, drags Cesaro back up and scoops. Powerslam! Hardy heads to the corner, climbs up top, but Cesaro UPPERCUTS first! Cesaro climbs, SUPER GUT WRENCH SUPLEX! Cover, TWO!?! Hardy still lives and Cesaro is furious. Cesaro drags Hardy up and reels him in. But no Neutralizer as Hardy back drops out! Cesaro LARIATS! Cover, TWO! Hardy rolls away to the apron and staggers to the ramp. Cesaro goes out the side and runs in, to EuroUpper Hardy against barriers! Cesaro whips, Hardy reverses, and Cesaro smashes into steel steps! The knee takes the hit, and Hardy tight rope walks the barriers. Hardy leaps to body check Cesaro! Hardy puts Cesaro in, climbs up top, SWANTON BOMB! Cover, Hardy wins!
Winner: Jeff Hardy, by pinfall
The comeback has begun! But that was a hard fought victory for Hardy! Will it only get harder from here knowing the Celtic Warrior will want his turn?
Booker, Renee and JBL return!
How do they see the Corporate Ladder match working out? Well they’ve all been to the WWE HQ and seen all the great features of the “shrine to this business.” JBL won’t give anything away, but he will say Titan Towers is very secure. Seems the locks will be left off tonight. And it’s a bit of a maze, so maybe there should be a map. But JBL’s choice is Aleister Black as Mr. MITB. Booker’s favorite moment at HQ was JBL giving that “weather report” during the blizzard. But as a fan of Bruce Lee and the Game of Death, going floor by floor, who knows how this MITB match will feel. Booker is ready to see AJ Styles turn it up and win. Renee agrees, Styles could be a favorite for being back so soon. But who wouldn’t want to see Otis do the Caterpillar on a ladder? Not JBL or Booker. Baron Corbin might also have an edge, but no previous experience really applies. Expect the unexpected, like what Macho Man used to say. JBL does agree with Booker’s idea of The Game of Death, this could be wild.
The most unique Money in the Bank EVER.
The risk is worth the reward. “Welcome to WWE Global Headquarters.” Proceed to the elevator. Going up to ultimate chaos. Incredible odds, unpredictable opponents, and never-before-seen obstacles. This ride and this building will force you to ride through every floor, go through every opponent, and put everything on the line. The climb up the corporate ladder starts now. Who is going up? And who is going down?
SmackDown Tag Team Championship Fatal 4 Way: The New Day VS Lucha House Party VS The Forgotten Sons VS The Miz & John Morrison!
AWWWW~ people at home~! The EIGHT-TIME champs are already risking a lot in this eight man, four team title match! Will they beat the odds and beat three teams in one night?
The introductions are made, the belts are raised, every team takes a corner. Two men must start, so we start with Kofi and Gran Metalik. Metalik and Kofi tie up, Metalik waistlocks but Kofi standing switches. Metalik headlocks then wrenches to a wristlock. Kofi rolls, handsprings and wrenches back. Kofi sweeps then splashes down, cover, ONE! Metalik is up and circles with Kofi again. They tie up, Kofi wristlocks and wrenches but Metalik handsprings and wrenches back. Metalik arm-drags then kips up to show off. Miz and Morrison talk trash but Metalik headlocks Kofi. Kofi powers out and things speed up. Kofi hurdles and elbows Metalik down! Metalik gets up but Kofi is right on him. Kofi whips but Metalik huricanranas back! Kofi rushes in and Metalik kicks back. Metalik runs but into a mule kick! Kofi runs but Wesley Blake tags in!
Blake throws Kofi out, sucker punches Big E then sucker punches Lince Dorado! Blake drags Metalik up to throw uppercuts then tags in Cutler. The Sons drag Metalik up to double backbreaker! Then they go after Miz & Morrison, but those two get clear. The Sons whip Metalik but he springboards to below them both down! Morrison tags in and kicks Metalik in the ribs! Morrison drags Metalik up and whips but Metalik reverses. Metalik dropkicks Morrison down in the corner, then climbs up top. Miz runs over but gets a boot. Morrison rocks Metalik first and brings him up, for a SUPER SPANISH FLY ONTO EVERYONE ELSE!! All eight men are down, but Jaxson Ryker checks on his guys. Metalik puts Morrison in, and springboards for a splash! Cover, TWO! Metalik almost had this one, but it’s not Lucha Time yet.
Morrison ROCKS Metalik, Cutler tags in, and Metalik leap frogs over Morrison, Metalik rocks Cutler then mule kicks Morrison, but Ryker trips Metalik up! Cutler stomps away and then BOOTS Metalik down! Cutler drags Metalik up, whips and elbows him down. Cover, TWO! Cutler stomps Metalik then drags him up. Tag to Blake, and Blake runs for Cutler to hip toss him onto Metalik! Cover, TWO! Blake kicks Metalik around and brings him up, just to elbow and dropkick him down! Cover, TWO! Blake and Big E talk smack but Blake clamps onto Metalik. Blake thrashes Metalik around in the chinlock but Metalik endures. Metalik fights up, throws body shots, but Blake elbows and elbows away. Tag to Cutler and the Sons both sucker punch The New Day! Cutler hurries up top and Blake lifts Metalik. Metalik huricanranas Blake out, then boots Cutler! Metalik hops up to tornado DDT! Morrison tags in off Cutler, but Metalik hot tags Lince! The Golden Lynx springboards to hit Morrison, then knocks Miz off the apron!
Lince keeps moving and QUEBRADAS! Cover but Miz drags Lince off. DROPSAULT! Cover, TWO!! Morrison flounders but puts Lince on the apron. Lince kicks back then springboards to DRAGON-RANA!! Cover, Blake breaks it! Kofi tags in to clobber Blake! FLYING CHUCK from Morrison! Morrison tags in Miz and they drag Kofi up. They double back suplex but Kofi lands on his feet, to DOUBLE STOMP! Cover on Miz, TWO! Kofi keeps moving and Penalty Kicks Miz down! Then he hits the NEW~ DAY~ Boom Drop! Kofi claps up but Ryker glares at him. Miz blocks Trouble in Paradise but Kofi denies the figure four! Cutler tags in, but so does Big E! cutler clotheslines Kofi out and goes right at Big E in the corner! He drags Big E up for a rain of rights, but Kofi tags back in! Kofi kicks Cutler, Big E has Cutler up, DOUBLE STOMP BOMB!! Cover, TWO!?! Cutler survives and Kofi can’t believe it!
Kofi tags Big E back in, and Big E scoops Cutler. Morrison shoves Kofi down! Blake tags in and they have Big E, but then Miz tags in! MEMORY REMAINS!! But Morrison hits a shining wizard! FINALE for Blake! Morrison tags in, STARSHIP PAIN!! Cover, Lucha House Party breaks it! Miz goes after Lince then Metalik. Metalik enziguris back, Lince SUPERKICKS! Morrison kicks Lince low then whips. Lince handsprings, GOLDEN REWIND! Metalik tags in off Morrison, but Morrison boots Lince. Metalik hits a SUPER STEINER! Big E stirs but Metalik is on him. Big E shoves, Lince tags in. Metalik escapes the big ending and Lince enziguris! Double enziguri! Big E is down, Metalik tags back in. BIG SPLASH from Lince, springboard MACHO ELBOW from Metalik! Cover, the Forgotten Sons break it! Cutler and Blake throw Metalik out hard then go back to Big E. The Sons drag Big E up, double whip, but Big E holds ropes. Big E dumps both Sons out then gives Kofi the BOOST! Kofi takes out Blake but Cutler POSTS Kofi!
Big E clobbers Cutler then builds speed. But Ryker dumps Big E out! No disqualifications in a Fatal 4, but the ref EJECTS Ryker! The Sons are furious but LHP DOUBLE SPRINGBOARD and take out the Sons, Miz and Morrison! Metalik crawls back to the ring just as Big E enters. Metalik springboards, but Big E rolls the crossbody over! Kofi gives Lince TROUBLE IN PARADISE! BIG ENDING!! Cover, The New Day win!!
Winners: The New Day, by pinfall (still SmackDown Tag Team Champions)
Chaos opens the night, but the gold stays with Kofi and Big E! Will any team find a way to end the eighth reign?
Lacey Evans speaks.
“Now this may be my first Money in the Bank Ladder match, but it is just the match I was made to win.” Lacey is US made, and by the US Marine Corps. That is where she learned the key to victory is proper preparation and a well-laid plan. She has studied the weaknesses of her opponents, and has memorized the WWE HQ layout. She is ready to fight her way up to the roof, climb the ladder, and become Ms. Money in the Bank. So Bayley, that means the Woman’s Right is ready any time Lacey wants. But will it even be Bayley that has the belt by the end of tonight?
Backstage interview with Drew McIntyre!
The world champion gives a big Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers of the world. And tonight is his first WWE Championship title defense since WrestleMania. McIntyre beat Brock Lesnar (and Big Show), but now must face a man that has defeated Lesnar: Seth Rollins. Many think McIntyre is an underdog champion, but McIntyre doesn’t see it. He knows that at first glance, he is Goliath. And everyone knows Rollins is one of the most talented and decorated of all time. But here’s the thing: there’s this thing called heard. There’s also passion and desire. McIntyre has worked his life to get the title. Rollins’ biggest problem is his mouth. So McIntyre is going to close that mouth in Claymore Country, by breaking that jaw.
MVP VS R-Truth!
Montel Vontavius Porter returns to MITB but not the way he’d hoped. But even so, he hopes to be THE MVP very soon. Will Truth show him #WhatsUp tonight?
Before the match, Truth asks the WWE Universe at home to make some noise! Yeah, that’s what he’s talking about. What’s up?! Well Truth has always been a bit loopy. Will that hold him back or help him out tonight? MVP makes his entrance and gets a mic. He doesn’t like that Truth tried to do the pose with him. Truth isn’t going to teach MVP how to ball. MVP taught the WWE about ballin’ so what can Truth teach him? Truth can teach MVP how to be BALLIN~! Two points right there. Then, BALLIN~! Three points! Truth says he can score six in one! BALLIN~! If Truth don’t get his fake Young Thug, offset Future wannabe mug out of MVP’s face… Truth is trying to help MVP help him help MVP. MVP says he’ll help Truth, alright.
But wait, Bobby Lashley comes out to the ring? He’s not scheduled here, because he also missed out on a spot in the MITB match. Lashley gets in the ring and takes a mic from MVP. “I’ve got this one.” That’s what’s up. MVP tags out, so to speak, and now Truth has a Rocky Mountain to climb!
Bobby Lashley VS R-Truth!
The bell rings and Truth doesn’t understand why only MVP gets the night off. Truth accidentally slaps Lashley as he turns to show “the whole big world” to him. Lashley glares and Truth apologizes. Truth dodges and wants Lashley to cool off. He hasn’t even taken his jacket off! Truth throws the jacket off, then tries to oldest trick in the book. But Lashley catches Truth and fires off in the corner! Lashley RAMS Truth over and over, then digs his forearms in. Lashley runs to RAM again! Truth flops down and Lashley is seething. Lashley drags Truth up to TOSS him across the ring! Truth writhes but Lashley watches him get to a corner. Lashley runs corner to corner, but runs into boots! Truth runs into Lashley’s SPINE BUSTER! Lashley toys with Truth, drags him up, and suplexes him. Lashley holds Truth up but Truth slips out! Truth kicks low, runs and misses the scissor kick. SPEAR!! Cover, Lashley wins!
Winner: Bobby Lashley, by pinfall
MVP’s substitute just taught Truth a lesson in self-awareness. Will Truth think twice before crossing paths with Lashley?
Baron Corbin speaks.
“WWE Universe, it feels good to be your king.” Look at all the amazing things he’s accomplished! He rid the world of Elias, beat the crap out of Drew Gulak, and handled the “desperate and needy” Daniel Bryan. Corbin’s team won on SmackDown, and he stood tall on the ladder. But the best is yet to come, because tonight he claims his second MITB victory. Now this year’s match is like no other before it, because it happens at WWE HQ, and the contract is on the roof! Even someone as brilliant as Corbin isn’t sure what to expect. But what he does know is that the risk IS worth the reward of having everyone now refer to him as King Money in the Bank. Corbin puts on his crown, but will he really have the treasure to go with it?
Backstage interview with Bayley and Sasha Banks.
Just as the “role models” are headed to gorilla, Kayla asks them about that coming match. Obviously they want to talk about how dominant Tamina is, but Bayley has business to take care of. Kayla brings up how Sasha’s failure to stop Lacey Evans allowed Tamina to pin Bayley. Does Bayley blame Sasha for the loss? NO! Bayley does NOT blame Sasha. Bayley is going to still win because she is SmackDown’s most dominant champion ever! So they’ve got to go. The strange thing is, Sasha didn’t actually speak for herself there. Will actions speak louder than words in mere moments?
SmackDown Women’s Championship: Bayley w/ Sasha Banks VS Tamina!
The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and this intense encounter begins!
The two circle and Bayley wants Tamina to pay attention to her. Bayley slaps and pushes Tamina around, wanting to see angry Tamina. Nice won’t win titles! Bayley throws body shots and punches, but Tamina blocks the whip! Tamina whips Bayley and clobbers her from behind! Bayley staggers up to a corner but Tamina stomps her down. Tamina whips corner to corner but Bayley goes up and hops on for a sleeper hold! Tamina rams Bayley into buckles until she’s free. She suplexes Bayley hard, then covers, TWO! Sasha coaches Bayley and Bayley complains Tamina had the tights. Tamina catches Bayley and clubs her on the back. She puts Bayley up top and pie faces in return. Tamina dares Bayley to be cocky now. Bayley stays up top and Tamina backs off. Tamina dares Bayley to come back for more and Bayley slowly climbs down. Bayley and Tamina approach, but Tamina kicks low to scoop slam hard! Bayley bails out and Tamina waits for her to return. Sasha distracts Tamina and Bayley trips Tamina up!
Bayley drags Tamina to a corner and SLAMS a leg against the post! Sasha taunts Tamina as Bayley SLAMS the leg again! The ref tells Sasha to stay back but Bayley gets in the ring. Bayley stomps Tamina down then throws forearms. Bayley tells commentary to call her a role model, as she dropkicks the leg against the apron! Then Bayley smashes the leg on the apron edge! Sasha applauds as Bayley goes back in and covers. TWO, but Bayley looms over Tamina. Bayley grabs the bad leg and stomps it! Tamina clutches her knee but Bayley knees her in the back. Bayley starts going after the arms now, and then drops an elbow. Cover, TWO! Sasha is annoyed with the ref and Bayley looms over Tamina again. Bayley drags Tamina up but Tamina throws hands! Tamina uppercuts and Bayley falls back! Bayley staggers into a headbutt! Bayley goes to a corner, Tamina runs in and corner splashes!
Tamina hobbles but fires up! She comes back, to HIP ATTACK! Bayley is in a daze as she staggers up. Tamina SUPERKICKS, but into a KNEEBAR! Bayley knew it was coming and she has Tamina’s leg! Tamina endures, rolls, and gets the ropebreak! The ref counts and Bayley lets go at 4. Bayley drags Tamina by the bad leg and stomps again. She throws forearms on Tamina at the ropes, but Tamina pushes her down. Tamina hobbles, into a KNEE! Fireman’s carry, but Tamina’s weight topples Bayley over! Both women are down and Sasha is panicking. Bayley crawls towards a corner but Tamina goes after her foot. Bayley kicks Tamina until she lets go. Bayley bails out and regroups with Sasha before going after Tamina with fury! She slams Tamina on the apron then clubs her across the neck. “Ten years my ass!” Oh but Happy Mother’s Day. Bayley SLAPS Tamina, then asks for water. Sasha takes Corey Graves’ bottle, and Bayley sips. Then she SPLASHES Tamina with water!
Tamina is enraged! Tamina grabs Bayley by her head, and throws her into the ropes, to then LARIAT! Sasha is freaking out as Bayley flounders up. Tamina throws her into the ladders at ringside! Tamina drags Bayley up to throw into the ring then stalks up behind her. Fireman’s carry but Bayley flails and gets to the apron. SUPERKICK sends Bayley down! Tamina catches her breath before fetching Bayley. Tamina’s rage is still burning, and she TOSSES Bayley over the announce desk! The ring count climbs but Tamina drags Bayley up. Tamina throws Bayley into more barriers, then puts her in the ring. Tamina climbs up to the top rope, SUPER- No! She saw Bayley’s boots coming and uses those to throw Bayley up. SUPERKICK, SAMOAN DROP!! But Sasha slides in! The ref stops her short and Tamina glares at her. Sasha slides back out, but Tamina pursues! Tamina chases Sasha around the way, grabs a foot, but Bayley runs in! Tamina scoops Bayley but Bayley hits the crucifix! Cover, Bayley wins!!
Winner: Bayley, by pinfall (still SmackDown Women’s Champion)
But Tamina doesn’t care! She has the fireman’s carry again! But Sasha chop blocks and KNEES Tamina down! The Boss has courage now that the match is over, and she gets the belt for her best friend. Will Sasha continue to watch Bayley’s back now, then and forever?
Seth Rollins speaks.
“Drew McIntyre knows who I am. Drew McIntyre knows what I am capable of. And most importantly, deep down in his heart, Drew McIntyre understands that it is MY destiny to defeat him tonight to become the WWE Champion.” In spite of all that, McIntyre is still willing to step into the fire with Rollins. Rollins admires that courage. So much so, Rollins will do McIntyre the favor of his life. Rollins will unburden McIntyre. This is not McIntyre’s industry, company or show to lead into the future. That duty is Rollins’ and his alone. So when Rollins beats McIntyre tonight, it will not be just for McIntyre’s good, but it will be for the greater good. The WWE Universe needs Rollins as champion, and Rollins needs to be the Monday Night Messiah. Will Rollins burn down Claymore Country to rebuild his own legacy?
WWE Universal Championship: Braun Strowman VS Bray Wyatt!
The Monster Among Men must revisit his past with the Eater of Worlds. Bray wants to rewrite the story between him and The Black Sheep, just as he did with John Cena. But will he get the happy ending he’s always wanted? Or will Braun refuse to play his games?
The introductions are made and this is indeed Firefly Fun House Bray that takes on Braun tonight. The belt is raised, and this horror story turned fantasy finally comes full circle!
Bray laughs but Braun just stares him down. Bray wants Braun to take it easy, but Braun shoves him to a corner! The time for talk is over. “Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.” The two tie up and Braun backs Bray down to ROCK him with that right. Braun whips and runs Bray over but Bray just laughs as he goes back to a corner. Bray forgot how strong Braun is. Braun says he’s not the boy he was when they met. The two circle and tie up again. Bray kicks low, uppercuts and headlocks. Braun powers out and runs Bray over again! Bray winces as he bails out. Braun shows no mercy as he goes out and throws BIG hands! Braun bumps Bray off the steel steps and Bray is dazed, but still laughing. But then Braun POSTS Bray hard! Braun looms over Bray as the ring count climbs. Braun drags Bray up and puts him in the ring at 6. He follows and runs corner to corner, for a big corner splash!
Braun roars as Bray flops and flounders back out of the ring. Bray crawls but Braun goes back out. The Strowman Express is on the tracks, but Bray sends him crashing over the announce desk! Bray used Strowman’s strength against him! Bray goes back to the ring to refresh the count and catch his breath. Braun drags himself up and back to ringside but Bray is watching with a big smile on his face. Wait, Huskis the pig boy is here?! Huskis is cheering Bray on as Bray gives Braun a DDT to the floor! Bray drags Braun up and into the ring, and runs to LARIAT! Cover, TWO! Bray drops a back senton fast! Braun flounders out of the ring now and Bray smiles again. Bray pursues Braun now and hammers him at the timekeeper’s area. Bray RAMS Braun into steel steps! Braun is in a daze and Bray is emotional. “Look what you made me do!” Bray doesn’t want to hurt Braun but he puts him in the ring. “I’m sorry.” The spider walk returns! Bray drags Bruan up but Braun CHOPS him!
Braun runs into a boot and Bray hops up. Bray reels Braun in, for a tornado DDT! He drags Braun up fast, for SISTER ABIGAIL! Cover, TWO!?! Braun survives and Bray is stunned! But Bray also manages to smile and laugh in disbelief. Braun gasps and Bray shouts, “I know!” Bray watches Braun stand up, and he has an evil glare on his face. A kiss good night, but Braun clamps on! CHOKE SLAM!! Bray is writhing again and Braun is floundering about. Bray gets to a corner and Braun runs in for a big corner splash! Braun keeps moving, and hits another splash! THen he throws Bray out of the ring! The Strowman Express is on the tracks again, and he RAMS Bray into barriers! Braun is furious as he drags Bray up again. Braun puts Bray in the ring, but Bray BOOTS Braun back out! Both men are down but it’s Braun on the outside. Champion’s Advantage means this count will only help Braun.
But Braun has put on the black sheep mask?! Bray is so happy to see THIS Braun is back! “I told them!” Bray asks if Braun understands what this means. Braun tears off his shirt, and Bray says this time will be “perfect.” Braun kneels beside Bray and they both praise the buzzards. Bray stands, laughing all the way. “I told them, Braun. I told them.” Braun stands with Bray, and they hug it out. Mercy, Abby and the other puppets show themselves. But wait, Braun takes off the mask?! Did he not fall for the trick? Braun STOMPS the mask, scoops Bray up, and hits the MONSTER SLAM!! Cover, Braun wins!!
Winner: Braun Strowman, by pinfall (still WWE Universal Champion)
Braun says he told Bray that he wasn’t getting in Braun’s head! Bray didn’t create Braun, Braun did this all on his own! After defying his inner demons, will the Monster Among Men ever be slain? Unless… Will Bray give “him” a turn in these dark mind games?
The Messenger speaks!
“You want to know who I am? I am everywhere. I see everyone. I hear everything.” He is the truth, and no one is safe. He’s in. Every video camera in the WWE Universe acts as his eyes, but we will soon hear the truth.
WWE World Championship: Drew McIntyre VS Seth Rollins!
We have heard from both the Scottish Stud and the Monday Night Messiah tonight. But now, their actions will decide the fate of Monday Night Raw, and by extension, the WWE itself! Will Claymore Country lead the resistance against Rollins’ delusions? Or is destiny becoming reality before our very eyes?
The introductions are made, Rollins has a far more grandiose entrance theme now, and the belt is raised. The bell rings, and the fight for Raw’s future begins!
McIntyre and Rollins circle and tie up. McIntyre powers Rollins to a corner but lets up as the ref calls for the break. He lets Rollins come out and the two go again. Rollins waistlocks but McIntyre hooks a leg. Rollins shifts ot a headlock but McIntyre lifts him up. Rollins holds on but McIntyre powers out the second try. McIntyre runs Rollins over and Rollins bails out. Rollins takes his time pacing around the ring before returning. The two circle and tie up again, and Rollins goes for a leg. McIntyre blocks the takedown and facelocks. Rollins works on the hold and reverses to a wrench. Rollins hammerlocks but McIntyre steps through to wrench and headlock. Rollins powers out but McIntyre runs him over! And again! And then clotheslines Rollins out! Rollins gets up but McIntyre is waiting. McIntyre says he’s even going to let Rollins have a breather, because he’s enjoying this. Rollins comes back and circles with McIntyre again.
The two tie up, McIntyre powers Rollins back again but Rollins uses that to put McIntyre in the corner. Rollins throws a cheap shot then more, and a CHOP! He whips but McIntyre reverses. McIntyre stays clear of Rollins going up and over, to CHOP him down! McIntyre throws hands then whips corner to corner hard! And then even harder the other way! Rollins tumbles up and back into a CHOP! McIntyre won’t let up, he dead lift suplexes! Cover, ONE, surprisingly. McIntyre rocks Rollins with a right then CHOPS Him in a corner! Rollins staggers but McIntyre scoops him. Rollins slips out an dropkicks a leg out! McIntyre shoves Rollins but Rollins dodges to dropkick the leg again! Rollins throws McIntyre into a post! McIntyre flops out to the floor and Rollins takes aim. Rollins builds speed and DIVES! Direct hit and McIntyre goes down just in front of the desk! Rollins drags McIntyre up and into the ring, then grabs a leg. Rollins wants to turn McIntyre but McIntyre powers him away. But Rollins comes back with a SLINGBLADE! Cover, ONE!
Rollins goes after the bad leg again, and turns McIntyre for a Half Crab! McIntyre endures as Rollins sits on the hold! McIntyre claws his way towards ropes, but Rollins shifts to an STF! Rollins cranks on the crossface but McIntyre endures that and the leg lock. McIntyre powers up, reaches, but Rollins shifts to a full crossface! Rollins cranks back on the neck but McIntyre refuses to stop crawling! He gets the ropebreak! Rollins holds on all the way to 4, cranking with each moment! McIntyre is on the apron so Rollins scrapes him off. Rollins aims again and builds speed, to DIVE! Another direct hit! McIntyre is down again and Rollins goes to the apron. Rollins says this isn’t about McIntyre, but he’ll still end him. McIntyre stands, Rollins leaps, FLYING KNEE! Rollins refreshes the count again as McIntyre flounders about. Rollins goes back to the barriers but McIntyre staggers away. Rollins springboards off the barriers, for ANOTHER flying knee! Again Rollins refreshes the count, and he clears off the announce desk!
Rollins stands on the desk, saying this is HIS kingdom. He leaps for yet another flying knee! McIntyre is down in a heap but Rollins goes back in the ring. The ref reprimands Rollins for bending the rule this far, and demands he let this get back in the ring. Rollins allows it, shouting that this is not about McIntyre. This is about Rollins and his duty. Rollins builds speed again, and DIVES, into McIntyre’s arms! McIntyre TOSSES Rollins up and over the desk! Rollins screams in pain, perhaps remembering his bad times out here from WrestleMania. McIntyre and Rollins both stagger up and towards the ring. They both get in at 3, and Rollins hurries over. McIntyre powers Rollins into a corner, then overhead suplexes him again! McIntyre whips and throws Rollins a third time! Rollins gets up, runs but into a BOOT! McIntyre hobbles but still goes up top. Rollins stands and McIntyre flying ax handles him down! And still manages a kip up!!
McIntyre dares Rollins to stand, but Rollins just runs to the apron! McIntyre grabs him but Rollins hotshots back! Rollins enziguris then springboards, but McIntyre dodges. SPINE BUSTER! Jackknife cover, TWO! McIntyre grits his teeth, not through with Rollins yet. McIntyre looms over Rollins and dares him to stand. Rollins slowly stirs, and McIntyre underhooks. Rollins slips out to kick the bad leg! And throw forearms! McIntyre swings but Rollins dodges to PELE! And SUPERKICK! Cover, ONE!? Even after all that, McIntyre is up at one?! Rollins hurries up top and frog splashes! Cover, TWO!! Rollins can’t believe McIntyre survived! But this is a battle of two men that slayed The Beast, Brock Lesnar, so it shouldn’t be a surprise. Rollins goes to the apron and seethes as he hobbles over to the timekeeper’s area. He takes a chair and brings it to the ring! The ref tells Rollins to leave it behind, and Rollins throws it aside. Rollins runs, but no stomp as he gets the GLASGOW KISS!
Rollins still sends McIntyre to the apron, but McIntyre goes up top. Rollins trips him up! McIntyre hits buckles and Rollins climbs up. Rollins drags McIntyre up but McIntyre headbutts Rollins down! McIntyre adjusts but Rollins is right back on him! SUPERPLEX! And roll through, to FALCON ARROW! Cover, TWO!! McIntyre still lives but Rollins is too tired to be angry. Both men slowly get up and Rollins aims from a corner. Rollins runs, but misses the stomp again! McIntyre spins him around, for FUTURE SHOCK!! Cover, TWO!?! Rollins survives and shocks McIntyre now. McIntyre beats some life into his bad leg, and he gets himself up. He stalks after Rollins and brings him up in a corner. McIntyre puts Rollins up top and CHOPS! McIntyre climbs up and hammers away with haymakers. Then from the very top, McIntyre lifts Rollins. Rollins trips McIntyre up and haymakers McIntyre into the Tree of Woe! Rollins stands on the bad leg, but McIntyre STILL sits up to SUPER GERMAN SUPLEX Rollins away!!
Rollins flounders to the other end, and the countdown begins. SUPERKICK! CURB STOMP!! Cover, TWO!?!? Rollins can’t believe it! Rollins denied the Claymore but could not finish it with his best move! McIntyre is in a daze as he fights his way up. Rollins says it’s time to end this. CURB- NO! GLASGOW KISS! SUPERKICK! CLAYMORE!! Cover, McIntyre wins!
Winner: Drew McIntyre, by pinfall (still WWE World Champion)
Incredible! McIntyre denies Rollins his “destiny,” proving that it wasn’t destiny at all! Will Claymore Country continue to conquer every contender?
Wait, Rollins sits up. McIntyre returns to him, to offer him a handshake out of respect. Rollins stands, and McIntyre says that if Rollins is worthy to be a leader, he’ll shake hands. Rollins does shake hands, very surprisingly. Does this mean Rollins will allow McIntyre to be Raw’s leader?
Backstage interview with R-Truth.
After his loss to Bobby Lashley instead of MVP, Truth… still thinks he beat MVP. MVP lost a lot of weight, from what Truth remembers. Truth should be on Cloud 9, but he has no one to celebrate with. Because his “Baby,” the WWE 24/7 Championship, isn’t here. Truth says that if he doesn’t want to be lonely, then he’s going to do something about it. He’s getting his baby back, baby! So it doesn’t matter where he took the WWE 24/7, 48-7, 7/11, I-95 South, 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue, Championship, Truth is gonna sack you, TOM BRADY! He means Gronk, right?
Money in the Bank Corporate Ladder Match!
Six women and six men are going to battle up all the floors of Titan Towers at the same time! Who makes it all the way to the roof to become Mr. and Ms. Money in the Bank?
The women start in the lobby by the elevators while the men start in the company gym. But wait, where is Asuka? Did she get lost on the way to HQ? But then, she’s already up on the balcony! She’s getting a head start, that’s not fair! But the bell rings and all hell breaks loose in the gym! Otis is on Styles, Mysterio goes after Aleister and Bryan brawls with Corbin! And of course Asuka LEAPS onto all five other women! Things are much more even in the lobby after that, but Asuka is laughing her way back up to her feet. Asuka dances and gets the elevator started. Hurry, hurry, hurry! The Empress of Tomorrow presses the buttons and the door closes just in time! Asuka’s head start is growing with every second, but the others hurry to the stairs.
Meanwhile, Aleister scrapes Mysterio’s face off the bars of a stair master. Mysterio boots back and then elbows. You can hear the others brawling as Aleister kicks Mysterio out of the air! Corbin knees Bryan low and throws big haymakers. Bryan swings on the chin-up bar to dropkick Corbin. Corbin grabs a loose weight and THROWS It! Bryan gets clear and the weight smashes the mirror! That’s bad luck. Otis haymakers Styles as Styles throws trash at him. Bryan clobbers Corbin and sits him down in a chair. Styles throat chops Otis and clubs him on the back. Aleister kicks Mysterio but Mysterio headscissors him into equipment! Styles goes to bump Otis off the paper towel dispenser, but Otis blocks to bump him first! Otis is pumped up as he’s ready to pump some iron. He brings the bar and sets it down on Styles! Styles is stuck and Otis heads off to the next floor. Styles begs Mysterio help him, but Mysterio says, “That’s loco.” The others get a head start on the Phenomenal One as they run down the hall!
Mysterio hears someone in the bathroom, and it’s Brother Love! “I looove~ you!” Bryan is in the lead but Corbin and Aleister are fast behind. Corbin catches up while Aleister boots Otis back. They brawl in the hall and Aleister BOOTS! Corbin wants the elevator to get going but Bryan bumps him off the wall. Aleister ROUNDHOUSES Bryan and a door opens! Otis and Bryan get inside but Aleister joins in. They brawl inside the elevator! Mysterio catches up but they’re already gone.
Back to the women, Carmella trips Shayna but then Lacey blows past them both. Mella catches up at the door, and the two have made it to the second floor. They and Shayna brawl to catch the elevator, but that’s the men coming in! The brawl gets even crazier now, and Asuka just hides in the corner of the elevator. Shayna throws Lacey into a wall and Asuka sneaks past. Shayna sees her and hurries after. The men still brawl and stomp each other, Aleister keeping Otis down. But as Bryan and Corbin are still busy with each other in the ropes, Aleister moves on. Otis cheers Bryan’s YES Kicks on, but then Bryan kicks Otis! And kicks and kicks and kicks! Bryan leaves Dozer and the Wolf King down to hurry after Aleister. Wait, is that Doink? Or Doink Junior perhaps? Dana Brooke has caught up to the others and argues with Shayna about where Asuka went. Mella wipes both Dana and Shayna out, but then Nia appears! Mella SLAPS Nia, but Nia picks her up to RAM her into a boardroom!
Nia headbutts Mella while Shayna bumps Dana off the door. Shayna throws Dana over the table but then Nia stares Shayna down. Shayna fires off forearms but Nia barely flinches. Nia ROCKS Shayna back, but then Dana uses a CHAIR! The chair shot takes Nia out, and Dana spots a briefcase. No, Dana, that’s just a prop. Dana thinks she’s won THE MITB briefcase, but Stephanie McMahon appears to set her straight. They’re destroying the conference room. Does Dana NOT remember that they have to go to the roof? And please clean Nia up, she’s drooling on the carpet. Gross. Dana feels like a fool, but then Mella uses a framed picture of her MITB win to SMASH Dana! Mella moonwalks her way out of the boardroom and heads into the WOMAN’S RIGHT! “Ya nasty.” Lacey heads off to catch up to Asuka.
Styles frees himself from the weight trap and dares Mysterio to show himself. Instead, Styles finds a big poster of Mysterio’s (Marvel) Mysterio entrance. Styles vows to find “Rey Rey” and punch him like he does the poster. He walks the halls and looks around every corner. Styles finds more locked doors than anything. But then, a poster of the Undertaker spooks him. The Boneyard still haunts Styles, so he hurries off to find Rey. A door finally opens, but… it’s Taker’s room!? Styles flashbacks to that night. And then Aleister ROUNDHOUSES him into the room! And locks him inside! Will Styles survive his living nightmare?
Paul Heyman is having a feast all to himself? Only for the superstars all to barge in. The men and the women end up in each other’s way and they argue. Heyman introduces himself, but Dana bumps into him! A sandwich goes flying into Otis, and he blows a gasket! “FOOD FIGHT!!” And he starts by hitting Heyman with the macaroni platter! Everyone is stunned silent, but then the food starts flying! Chips, salad, dip, whatever is near! Shayna puts Mysterio in the KIRAFUDA KLUTCH! And then Mysterio ends up the middle of a Nia-Otis SANDWICH! The King of Lucha goes down while Aleister and Bryan brawl in the background. Dana and Mella smack Lacey around, and Heyman is just shielding himself with his plate. Dana knocks Mella into Nia and Nia turns her wrath on Dana. Nia grabs Dana and throws her up against the soda machine! Mella FABULOUS Kicks Nia once, but then gets caught for a POWERBOMB through the buffet table!!
The Irresistible Force stares down Dozer. The literally biggest superstars in this match leave it at this, and head for the next floor. Otis is in the kitchen now, and he digs into whatever is out. Oh, pie! But then, Johnny Laurinitis wheels up? “People power.” Nah, PIE power! Down goes Johnny Ace! And off goes Otis, looking for stairs. A janitor is cleaning up the break room as Asuka runs in. Asuka asks him where to go in Japanese but he doesn’t understand. The other women show up and Asuka throws the mop at them! Then Dana comes in and SLIPS on the wet floor. That’s gonna hurt for awhile. Asuka ROUNDHOUSES Shayna and Lacey ROCKS her with a right! Nia shoves Lacey then tosses Shayna! Asuka just worries about getting to more stairs. Nia is right after her but Lacey crawls her way up.
Meanwhile, Bryan and Aleister are brawling their way down the halls. Aleister whips Bryan into a wall but Styles returns to ROCK him! Bryan throws hands on Styles and Styles bumps him off a desk. Bryan throws Styles through a doorway and Styles flounders up. They brawl more, but wait, wait, wait! This is VINCE MCMAHON’s office! And he’s here right now!! Vince shouts at them to get out. They blame each other but both Bryan and Styles make sure to set the chairs back where they were. Styles and Bryan leave and shut the door. Vince sanitizes his hands just to be safe. Styles tells Bryan he was a wimp, but Bryan points out Styles put the chairs back. Styles throws hands! Bryan throws hands back and their brawl returns to the hall. Corbin returns to RAM his scepter into Bryan! And into Styles! Aleister hits Corbin but Corbin ROCKS Aleister! Corbin drags Bryan up to throw him over a boardroom table, but Styles comes back with haymakers. Corbin bounces Styles off counters and throws him into framed PPV posters! “I’m going to the roof!”
Finally, the superstars have reached the very top of Titan Towers. Now the true ladder match can begin. Nia shoves Asuka down and then puts her in the ring. Nia drags Asuka up but Asuka back kicks. Lacey runs in to LARIAT Asuka, but Nia headbutts Lacey down! Nia scoops Lacey and trophy lifts her up, for the drop! Then she throws Lacey out of the ring before fetching a ladder. Nia puts the ladder in the ring and stands it up. She climbs up the ladder, but Asuka gets in and stops her! Asuka drags Nia down to fire off palm strikes! Nia blocks the back hand to BASH Asuka off the ladder! WOMAN’S RIGHT!! Lacey adjusts the ladder and climbs, but Asuka returns to stop her, too! Lacey lands hard on the mat and now Asuka has a clear path. Asuka sees Nia getting up so she shoves the ladder down onto her! Asuka resets the ladder and begins her climb, but Lacey gets up. Lacey bumps Asuka off the ladder over and over again! Lacey throws Asuka aside and climbs up.
But Asuka returns again! Lacey kicks Asuka away but Asuka won’t stop. Asuka clubs Lacey and then climbs again. Lacey returns to drag Asuka down, but she still goes up! Nia rises, Lacey falls onto her!! Asuka flounders down a couple rungs but she stays up. Asuka climbs again, but here comes Corbin! Corbin climbs up but they’re confused as to which briefcase is which! Asuka SLAPS and BOOTS Corbin down and grabs at the white briefcase. She takes it off the hook, and is MS MONEY IN THE BANK!!
Winner: Asuka; becomes Miss Money in the Bank
But of course this is only half of this Corporate Ladder match! The men are still competing, even if Corbin got slapped by the Empress. Otis appears and has a clear path! Otis remembers the structural difficulties of the ladders on SmackDown, and it seems they still apply here. Corbin returns and clobbers Otis! He throws hands on Otis in a corner of the ring, then brings the ladder over. Corbin RAMS Otis with the ladder then drops it down. Corbin runs in but Otis dodges! Down goes Corbin, and here comes the CATERPILLAR! The elbow flattens Corbin but BLACK MASS rocks Otis!! Aleister has the ladder, but Mysterio catches up to springboard seated senton Otis! Mysterio and Aleister fight over the ladder, but then decide to climb it at the same time. They fight up top and Styles returns! Styles tips the ladder over and both Mysterio and Aleister crash down!
Corbin drags Mysterio up, and throws him OFF THE ROOF?! Then Corbin does the same to Aleister! But, from the sound of it, they actually fell on something just below. Back in the ring, Styles has the ladder set up but Bryan pursues! Corbin drags Bryan down and Otis grabs at Styles. Styles reaches for the briefcase while Corbin POSTS Bryan! Otis gets Styles down but Styles PELES! Styles runs but is put on the apron. He forearms Otis away then springboards, PHENOMENAL FOREARM take Otis down! Styles goes back to the ladder and climbs up again. Corbin climbs up on the other end, and stops Styles from grabbing the briefcase. Styles hits Corbin but Corbin hits Styles. The two grab at the briefcase at the same time, and Styles takes it off the clip! They both have it, but it’s about who comes off the ladder! Wait, is that Elias?! He uses his guitar to SMASH Corbin! Corbin falls, Styles fumbles the briefcase, and Otis catches it!! OTIS WINS!?!
Winner: Otis Dozovic; becomes Mr. Money in the Bank
What luck! Otis wasn’t up top on the ladder, but he was in the right place at the right time! And his celebration causes the ladder to fall over and send Styles flying! “Yo, Mandy! I did it!” Otis has a guaranteed shot at the WWE Universal Champion, but will Strowman ever see him COMIIIIN~?
What a wild MITB! Yet, the status quo was kept when it came to the titles. But I’m not as upset about that since the matches were all great. I predicted the SmackDown Tag and Women’s titles were staying with the champions, but that Fatal 4 Way was hectic in a good way, and I liked the tease of Tamina almost pulling it off. Sasha helped Bayley retain and get away from Tamina in one piece, but I’m thinking “The Messenger” is ready to expose that friendship for what it is. Meanwhile, I have no idea what’s going to happen with the SmackDown Tag Division, unless Forgotten Sons are getting a 2v2 opportunity for Backlash. By the way, very disappointed that Backlash is next and not Extreme Rules. I was hoping many stories, namely from SmackDown, were going to get Extreme Rules based payoffs but maybe that happens in July this year.
The kickoff match of Hardy VS Cesaro was pretty good for Hardy’s first match in this newest return. I was a bit worried Cesaro legitimately got hurt from that Whisper in the Winds, but he’s just a great seller. I’m surprised Sheamus didn’t come out to ruin Hardy’s celebration, and maybe even tease The Bar reuniting since it seems like The Artist Collective isn’t really getting to do much right now. Maybe Sheamus just joins the Collective or even hijacks it from Sami Zayn and Baron Corbin. Lashley subbing in for MVP is an interesting turn in both their stories. I was hoping MVP recruited Ricochet and Cedric Alexander, but MVP working with Lashley could be great for both of them. Truth’s promo about getting the 24/7 title back was hilarious, but Truth is always amazing at comedy. I can’t wait for that first social media match in Tampa.
Strowman VS Wyatt and McIntyre VS Rollins were both great world title matches. Braun and Bray had such great story elements in their match, such as the puppets and the black sheep mask appearing. I almost thought Braun had become Bray’s human puppet, but it was pretty great for Braun to have shrugged that off. And watching Bray at the end of that match, clearly the next step is to see if Braun can beat The Fiend at Backlash. Rollins and McIntyre put on the better pure match, but I do like that they made a story beat out of the tope suicida hat trick. Rollins didn’t just spam it, he made points of using them, only for it to fail right at the end. McIntyre wins and who knows what that handshake at the end means for Raw going forward.
Last but certainly not least, the Corporate Ladder match. It didn’t start how I pictured in my mind, but then it went above my expectations while still meeting some plot points I was hoping to see. Though it did paint Dana as a bit forgetful. They were told for weeks that this would be a match that ends on the roof. Why would she think the briefcase was in that random conference room? Also she did that wet floor spot so well I thought she might’ve legit cracked her head on the floor. The food fight chaos was pretty great. Shayna gets some points for getting Mysterio in her signature submission and almost choking him out. Shayna gets a bit of a raw deal being left behind with Dana and Mella, though. But in the end, I knew Asuka was getting that briefcase. Shayna doesn’t need a shortcut, it works better for her if she takes the long route to the title this time. While Becky Lynch has been advertised for wanting to confront Ms. MITB, I think Asuka will choose to take her time with her cash-in. Becky and Nia should finally have a feud to revisit the origins of “The Man.” That would be pretty good for Backlash, and then Asuka can just bide her time.
On the men’s side of things, I like that Vince got to have a part to play. They also got all the cameos from legends like Brother Love, John Laurinitis and “Doink the Clown.” And they also had the only people thrown off the roof! I’m pretty sure Mysterio and Aleister will return tomorrow on Raw, but I’m sure for kayfabe’s sake they’ll have bandaged something. I did not think they were going to modify the WrestleMania SmackDown Tag Team Championship ending. But what a great surprise that Otis actually won! This keeps the math on Corbin accurate since he jinxed himself on SmackDown. The only question is now, will Otis really pull off a cash-in? They do have a whole year to figure it out, but I just hope they don’t Mr. Kennedy this and have someone like Ziggler goad Otis into putting the briefcase on the line.
My Score: 8.5/10
Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (12/5/22)
Who will be The Ones?
There’s a lot on the line for The Bloodline!
United though they may be, The Bloodline still needs to be on guard! Jimmy & Jey Uso return to Raw to defend their Undisputed Tag Team Championships against Matt Riddle & Elias!
- Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championships: The Usos VS Matt Riddle & Elias; The Usos win and retain the titles.
- Triple Threat: Bayley VS Rhea Ripley VS Asuka; Bayley wins and advances to next week’s Raw Women’s Championship #1 contenders match.
- WWE United States Championship: Austin Theory VS Mustafa Ali; Theory wins by disqualification and retains the title.
- JBL’s High Stakes Poker Invitational: Lumis wins.
- Six Man Tag: The OC VS Baron Corbin & The Alpha Academy; The OC wins.
- Dominik Mysterio VS Akira Tozawa; Dominik wins.
- Triple Threat: Becky Lynch VS Alexa Bliss VS Nikki Cross; wins and advances to next week’s Raw Women’s Championship #1 contenders match.
PLAY PY PLAY
Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championships: The Usos VS Matt Riddle & Elias!
The Bloodline is here as Sami Zayn and Solo Sikoa accompany Jimmy & Jey to the ring. The reign is over 500 days and counting, but could that time be up here in Washington, DC? Or will
As footage shows, it was earlier tonight when the Bloodline arrived. They were fired up, but Byron Saxton walked over to interview them. But then The Bro scooters in super fast! The Bloodline gets clear, and they’re upset. Jey says it doesn’t matter, they gonna get Riddle AND Elias tonight like they have every other team! If Riddle and Elias want at the titles, just look who showed up tonight? But then Elias comes out of his tour bus to ask what all the commotion’s about. Solo CLOBBERS Elias from behind! The Bloodline mugs The Drifter, and Solo whips Elias into spare railing! Sami says that’s what they get! Then he realizes Elias might be hurt.
In the present, Jey gets a mic to say, “The Bloodline is now in your city!” But Jimmy says there’s some bad news. The championship match that was supposed to go down is officially canceled! Cuz the Enforcer, Solo Sikoa, done bodied Elias in the parking lot. Now, everyone surely came here to see them compete, but here’s the bright side: Riddle won’t be humiliated, and Elias can go home to work on any song he wants to. Sami adds, “Bet! Sorry, it just felt like a good time for a ‘bet.'” Jimmy understands. But what you can look forward to now is the Usos focusing on being the best tag team ever!
The Usos will defend against any team that wants to run up, but those that run up will get done up! Because everyone else is the twos, and #WeTheOnes! But “Bro…” Riddle comes out to say, “First of all, it wasn’t so cool of you guys to take out my partner Elias tonight, dude. Like tonight was his first night to finally get WWE gold. And honestly, if I’m being real, it’s not really like The Bloodline to run from a fight. I would say it’s not very… How you say? Ucey?” Sami tells Riddle, “Yo yo yo yo yo yo! Hold up, my dawg.” Sami wants to explain something to Riddle. Riddle is not the one who decides what is or isn’t Ucey. Sami’s a bit of an expert in this field.
In fact, Sami is a certified Uceologist. What? Sami is the one to say what is and isn’t Ucey. For example, Solo Sikoa showing once again why he IS the Enforcer by destroying Elias, that is UCEY! The Usos continuing to be the longest reigning tag team champions in history, that is UCEY! Riddle coming out here, running his mouth, thinking he ever had a chance at beating them is NOT Ucey. So unless Riddle wants to suffer the same fate as Elias, just go home. Riddle says he did find someone else. And there WILL be a tag title match tonight! Now, Riddle and this guy aren’t really bros, but they both hate the Bloodline. It’s KEVIN OWENS!!
The Prizefighter and the Bro go to the ring but the Usos say that’s fine. Will the #KOBros be the ones to dethrone Jimmy & Jey?
The teams sort out, Kevin and Jey start and the bell rings. Kevin blocks Jey’s superkick and fires off haymakers! Kevin has Jey in a corner, the ref counts and Kevin lets off at 4. Kevin drags Jey up to whip to ropes and he CLOBBERS Jey with an elbow, to then SENTON! Cover, TWO! Sami coaches Jey but Kevin drags Jey up. Kevin bumps Jey off buckles, JABS, then backs up to run corner to corner! CANNO- NO, Jimmy gets Jey out of the way. Fans boo but Kevin goes out after them all to CLOBBER Jimmy! Kevin whips Jey into barriers! Fans fire up with Kevin, Kevin asks Solo what he’s staring at, and Raw goes to break.
Raw returns as Kevin covers, TWO! Jimmy survives the cannonball but Kevin knocks him back down. Kevin goes up and up and MOONSUALTS! Cover, ONE!! Jimmy scrambles to ropes, Sami is upset about things, but Riddle tags in. Riddle stands Jimmy up to ROCK him with haymakers. Riddle whips, Jimmy reverses but Riddle holds ropes to BOOT Jimmy. But Jimmy distracts the ref and Jey ENZIGURIS Riddle down! Sami is fired up but fans boo the cheap shot. Jimmy tags Jey, the Usos split the wishbone. Jey looms over Riddle, he drags Riddle around then stomps him down. Jey throws his shirt at Kevin but Kevin just throws it on the floor.
Jey CHOKES Riddle on the ropes, he lets off at 4, and Jimmy BOOTS Riddle down! The cheap shots continue and fans boo again. Jey drags Riddle up, scoops him and tags Jimmy. Jimmy climbs up, BACKBREAKER AX HANDLE COMBO! Cover, TWO! Riddle hangs tough and the Usos are annoyed. Fans rally but Jimmy drags Riddle up to ROCK him! Riddle ROCKS Jimmy back, fires off more shots, then he BLASTS Jey! Jimmy UPPERCUTS Riddle down! Jimmy BLASTS Kevin for good measure! But Riddle fires off forearms on Jimmy! Jey tags in as Riddle whips, and Jimmy reverses, the Usos DOUBLE SPINEBUSTER! Jey covers, TWO!
Sami is anxious and even Solo shows a bit of stress as Riddle is still in this. But Sami says Jey has Riddle where they want him. Jey stands Riddle up but Riddle CHOPS and CHOPS and fires off fast hands! Jey ducks the roundhouse, to POP-UP NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO!! Riddle survives but still in a bad way as Raw goes to break.
Raw returns again and Riddle wipes out both Usos! Riddle BROTONS Jimmy then tags in Kevin! Kevin goes up top fast, to SWANTON BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Sami is stressing out as Kevin keeps focus on Jimmy. Jimmy rises slowly and Sami tries to warn him, but Jimmy turns around into a kick! But Jimmy stops the Stunner! Kevin stops the superkick, to SUPERKICK back! Kevin whips, but Jimmy slips off the pop-up to SUPERKICK! Both men are down and fans fire up! Both men crawl, hot tags to Jey and Riddle! Riddle spins Jey around to PELE! Then Riddle kips up, but Jey mule kicks and UPPERCUTS!
Riddle goes to ropes, Jey run sin but Riddle headscissors him out of the ring! Riddle hurries back in, Sami helps Jey stand up. Kevin storms over but Solo stands in the way! The ref warns Solo, but then Riddle PLANCHAS to take Solo out! Jey SUPERKICKS Kevin! Riddle FLASH KNEES Jey! Riddle puts Jey in, tells Sami to back off, but Jimmy tags in! Riddle rushes Jey but Jimmy storms in. Riddle ROCKS Jimmy, Jey USPERKICKS Riddle! ONE D on the rebound!! Cover, USOS WIN!
Winners: The Usos, by pinfall (still Undisputed WWE Tag Team Champions)
The Bloodline’s numbers game is the real unstoppable force in the WWE! And now Sami and the Usos mug Riddle! But Kevin has a chair! He SMACKS Jimmy, and he SMACKS Jey! Sami gets away but Kevin chases him to the back! Solo gets in the ring to SUPERKICK Riddle! Solo fires off on Riddle with heavy fists! Fans boo but the Enforcer isn’t done with Riddle yet. Solo has a taped up thumb, shoutout to Umaga with the SAMOAN SPIKE!! Riddle sputters and crawls to a corner, Solo runs in to HIP ATTACK!! Solo’s rage is unleashed as he gets a chair for himself.
Solo puts the chair around Riddle’s head, punches Riddle down, then goes to the far corner. Fans boo as hard as they can but Solo roars and runs in, FULL METAL HIP ATTACK!!! Riddle writhes and clutches his neck! Medics rush out and put Riddle in a neck brace and onto a backboard. Did Solo just sideline The Bro all on his own?
BREAKING NEWS for SmackDown!
Sheamus and Drew McIntyre wanted to challenge the winners to an Undisputed Tag Team Championship match this Friday, but the Scottish Warrior is unfortunately not cleared medically. That means the Celtic Warrior will have “Butch” as his new tag partner! Will Pete Dunne be able to help Sheamus against the Usos? Or will it be more of the same from The Bloodline?
The Judgment Day speaks.
Rhea says, “Bayley and Asuka, they’re both credible. They’ve both been Women’s Champion, they’ve both been Women’s Tag Team Champion. They’re both very, very good at what they do. But you know what they’re not? They’re not Rhea bloody Ripley! So when I’m done with them tonight and they’re laying in that ring crying their eyes out and I move on to Bianca Belair for the Raw Women’s Championship, and when I’m done with Bianca, the whole Raw Women’s locker room will be calling me Mami.” The Judgment Day like that, and then Rhea high-fives as she heads out. Will the Eradicator eliminate everyone in her path to the title?
JBL’s Poker Invitational begins!
Tamina, Dana Brooke, Shelton Benjamin, Dominik Mysterio and Akira Tozawa are one table, while Chad Gable, Luke Gallows and Baron Corbin are another. Otis has a huge plate of sausage but he isn’t sharing. JBL walks over to say, “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the JBL Poker Invitational, an event that’ll become as big a tradition as The Masters, the Olympics, and as grand a spectacle as WrestleMania. Now, I know a lot of you don’t see eye to eye, and Tozawa… Nobody likes you. But poker is a gentlemen’s, and gentlewoman’s, sport. Especially in the high stakes room. The rules are simple: It is a dime ante. 10, 20K-”
BOOM! Dexter Lumis enters with Johnny Gargano, and he drops the Louis Vuitton bag full of cash he won from The Miz! JBL assumes Crystal Lake doesn’t get mail, but Jason Vorhees here needs an invitation. And JBL is pretty sure he didn’t invite the… one-and-a-half of them. Besides, Lumis can’t possibly have the 50K buy-in. So go stare at someone else. Gargano says “Show ’em.” And Lumis dumps the money out! Well okay! Welcome to the tournament! Lumis has a seat at the table, will anyone be able to crack that poker face?
Triple Threat: Bayley VS Rhea Ripley VS Asuka!
A Role Model, an Eradicator and an Empress walk into the ring, but this ain’t no joke! Only one can move on to the next round, who will be one step closer to facing The RawEST Women’s Champion?
But then surprisingly, Becky Lynch calls to Bayley from up in the bleachers! “Hey, ol’ pal! Well, I dunno if I can call ya pal anymore, seeing as how you and your cronies keep trying to jump me.” Fans cheer Becky on and she says, “I was just up at the merch stand, reminiscing about how fun it was last week, me beating up Bayley and her two cronies at one time. That was awesome.” Bayley says it’d be more awesome if Becky could hurry this up. Bayley has stuff to do. Well Becky wants Bayley to know that first, this is a great fan sign, #BigTimeBecky. But did Bayley also know that it’s been over three years since they faced each other 1v1?
Becky says they didn’t even scratch the surface back then. She was gone, Bayley showed up, but kudos to Bayley for carrying the WWE during the ThunderDome era! She really did! She was champion, Double Champion, sometimes doing double and triple duty. Bayley says the fans can cheer for that. The fans do cheer! Becky says Bayley was awesome, but then Becky came back right as Bayley was gone. And then Bayley came back right as Becky was gone. Bayley says she’s kinda repeating herself, and we all know the history. But Becky has a match so she should go, and also Bayley has a match right now that she’s about to win.
So the point is, Becky doesn’t need to tell Bayley’s history. That doesn’t matter now. Stop living in the past! Becky came down the stairs, she’s interrupting matches and Bayley’s “Magic!” Becky thinks she can just do whatever she wants, huh? Yeah, actually, she does. Becky was just trying to catch up. But Bayley says the difference between them, now more than ever, when Becky is here, it’s all about her, isn’t it? Fans cheer Becky because they definitely like her. Bayley says the fans just make it worse. Becky doesn’t care about the fans or anyone else! BAYLEY cares about the fans and the wrestlers!
And that’s what Bayley has been doing while Becky’s been gone. That’s why Bayley has Dakota Kai & Iyo Sky. She looks out of the future for the idiot fans! And the locker room! Bayley sees the bigger picture, but Becky just looks in the mirror! No one cheers, huh? That’s because no one has respect for what Bayley’s doing! Fans still cheer Becky. Becky says Bayley is looking out for people, and DMG CTRL has been successful. Well, two thirds have been, because there’s two champs and one loser. But hey, good luck tonight. Maybe they can finally go 1v1 again and make some history. If Bayley’s woman enough to face The Man, that is.
Becky leaves just as Rhea makes her entrance. Will Big Time Becks have to change her plans on who she’s facing next round?
Raw returns and Asuka makes her entrance. The bell rings and Asuka DROPKICKS Bayley! But Rhea rolls Asuka, ONE!! Asuka dodges Rhea’s haymaker but Bayley ROCKS her! Bayley grab at Asuka but Rhea rolls Bayley up, ONE!! Rhea kicks and stomps and KNEE SMASHES Bayley to then throw her out. Asuka runs in but Rhea catches her hip attack! Rhea CLUBS Asuka, suplexes high and hard, then covers, TWO! Rhea CLUBS Asuka, CLUBS her more, then bumps her off buckles. Fans rally for Asuka but Rhea RAMS into her again and again. Bayley runs up, but Rhea blocks the roll-up! Bayley avoids the stomp, and the two stare down.
Bayley taunts “Mami,” then dodges her haymaker to waistlock. Rhea pries the hold, bucks Bayley at the ropes, then runs in again to scoop. Bayley slips off, but Rhea blocks the punch! Rhea throws body shots, RAMS Bayley into the corner and RAMS into her more! Rhea then brings Bayley out to snap suplex! Rhea looms over Bayley, goes back to Asuka, and whips her corner to corner hard! Rhea then goes to Bayley to CLUB her down. Rhea grins as she whips corner to corner and Bayley hits buckles hard! Rhea grins more as she storms over to Asuka. Rhea stands Asuka up but Asuka throws body shots!
Rhea kicks low, TOSSES Asuka aside, then TOSSES Bayley around! Fans rally as Rhea soaks up the heat. Rhea storms over to Asuka and drags her up. Asuka throws more body shots, then kicks and a SOBAT! Bayley runs in to BLINDSIDE LARIAT Rhea, Asuka SLIDING KICKS! Asuka and Bayley come to an understanding to mug Rhea, and they POST her! Then Bayley kicks Asuka and headlocks. Asuka fires body shots, powers out and runs Bayley over! Bayley goes to the apron, she avoids the hip attack and she drags Asuka out to throw her into barriers! Bayley CLUBS Asuka, but Rhea CANNONBALLS them both! Fans fire up as Rhea laughs, and Raw goes to break!
Raw returns again and Bayley paces around as Rhea smothers Asuka into the mat with a forearm. Seems Bayley and Rhea now have that understanding, and Rhea sits Asuka up for Bayley to stomp down. Bayley talks trash, Rhea slaps Asuka around, and they drag Asuka up. Rhea bumps Asuka off buckles, then Rhea whips Bayley in, but Asuka puts her on the apron! Asuka dodges Rhea, URAKEN, URAKEN, SOBAT, KICK and URAKEN to an AX HANDLE! But Rhea blocks the whip! Rhea whips Asuka to a corner, but Asuka dodges! ROUNDHOUSE! Bayley runs in but is sent into Bayley! Rhea SLAMS Bayley, but Asuka uses Bayley as a step to BOOT Rhea!
Fans fire up as Asuka SOBATS Rhea again. Asuka headlocks Rhea, runs at Bayley, but only the LRIAT Hits as Rhea fights the bulldog. Rhea runs in, Asuka dodges, CODE BREAKER! Cover, TWO! Asuka fires up and fans are with her as she watches Rhea and Bayley sit up. Asuka KICKS Rhea, she KICKS Bayley, then back to Rhea! Another for Bayley! Rhea! Bayley, but she ducks! Roll-up, TWO! Bayley kicks but into an ANKLE LOCK! Bayley flails, reaches out, pulls at Asuka’s hair but that won’t stop this. Rhea gets up and storms over, but Bayley grabs Rhea’s hair! Rhea HEADBUTTS Bayley, and Asuka GERMAN SUPLEXES her!
Asuka avoids a kick from Rhea to ROUNDHOUSE Rhea down! Fans fire up but Bayley drags Asuka out! Bayley hurries back in, she calls to Rhea, and Rhea shakes out the cobwebs. Rhea stands up and Bayley still wants to work together. Rhea says she won’t let Bayley boss her around. Bayley says okay, and then she lunges! Into a choke grip! Rhea know that was coming, but Bayley ROCKS her with a forearm! Rhea ROCKS Bayley, Bayley ROCKS Rhea, repeat! Bayley pulls hair but Rhea throws body shots! Bayley hits back, Rhea throws more! Asuka leaps for a DOUBLE CODE BREAKER!! Cover on Rhea, TWO!! Cover on Bayley, TWO!!
Fans fire up and Asuka hurries to a corner. Asuka climbs but Bayley is after her! They brawl, Asuka sends Bayley down then leaps, MISSILE DROPKICK! Cover, TWO! ASUKA LOCK!!! Bayley flails, reaches out, crawls around with her one free arm, but Rhea returns! Rhea basement dropkicks them both! Cover on Asuka, TWO! Rhea is frustrated but fans rally up. Rhea drags Asuka up to short arm LARIAT! Rhea drags Asuka up again, for another short arm LARIAT! Fans fire up, Rhea drags Asuka up again, but Asuka turns lariat to ARMBAR TAKEDOWN!! Rhea flails, kicks, but Bayley MACHO ELBOWS Asuka! Cover on Asuka, TWO!!
Bayley frowns as she drags herself back up. Bayley runs to CLOBBER Asuka, then she rains down fists! Bayley drags Asuka back up, BAYLEY2BELLY! Cover, Rhea breaks it!! Rhea reels Bayley in for a HEADBUTT! And another! And another! And then a NORTHERN LIGHTS! Bridging cover, TWO! Rhea grows frustrated but she turns her attention to Asuka. Asuka kicks, but into an Electric Chair Lift! And SLAM!! Cover, TWO!!! Asuka survives and Rhea cannot believe it! Fans fire up, Rhea hurries to DROPKICK Bayley out of the ring! Rhea hurries outside, runs in around the way, but Bayley KICKS her legs out! Bayley hurries in, ducks a kick and clinches! BAYLEY2- ROLL UP! TWO!!!
Asuka URAKENS! URKAENS! SOBATS! Bayley ducks the next hand, RAMS Asuka to a corner, then runs in, into a ROUNDHOUSE!! Asuka goes up, MISSILE- NO, Bayley deflects it! ROSE PLANT!!! Cover, BAYLEY WINS!
Winner: Bayley, by pinfall (advances to next week)
Rhea is furious, but she takes it out on Asuka! Rhea kicks Asuka around, then pump handles for the RIPTIDE!! Bayley grins as she moves on, but who will she meet in the #1 contender’s match?
Seth Rollins is here!
DC sings for The Visionary as he swaggers his way to the ring. Rollins is here in DC to welcome them to Monday Night Rollins! “you know me, you love me. I am the Visionary, I am the revolutionary, I am Seth… “FREAKIN’ ROLLINS!” And Rollins has big news for DC! “One week from tonight, yours truly is going to go one-on-one with The All Mighty Bobby Lashley! And the winner of that there little match will be your new #1 contender to the United States Championship.” And he’d love to say a lot of things to ol’ “Bob,” but it’s not fun if he’s not out here. And DC wants to have fun, right? The fans cheer and Rollins says they had fun singing his song.
Fans sing again, “OH~ OHH~ OHHH~!” But then here comes Lashley! Fans cheer as he walks out on stage in a crimson and black suit to counter Rollins’ sky blue and white one. Lashley goes to the ring with a mic of his own to say, “So, Seth, I’m here. So what would you like to tell me. Now be careful with that.” Rollins wants Lashley to hold on. Lashley just hasn’t been the same since Crown Jewel and that loss to Brock Lesnar. And there’s no shame in losing to Lesnar! Been there, done that. But what is with Lashley’s Lesnar obsession? Is Lashley… scared of Lesnar? Rollins knows Lesnar is bigger and stronger-
Lashley stops Rollins there because he knows Rollins is just trying to get under his skin and rattle his cage. No, no, no! Rollins accepts Lashley isn’t afraid. So then… He must be jealous of Lesnar. That’s it! Because Lesnar’s a bigger star, won more championships. That’s gotta be it. Lesnar had the career Lashley wishes he had. Lashley grabs Rollins by his hair to tell him this is NOT about Lesnar! This is about Rollins, Lashley, and the US Championship that should be around Lashley’s waist. Rollins says okay, but just relax. Bob knows as well as Rollins does that the US title won’t fill the void in Lashley’s heart left by the fact that he can’t beat lesnar.
If Lashley doesn’t get his head right, he can’t get his temper right, and beating him will be a lot easier for Rollins than the first. time. Lashley DECKS Rollins for that! Rollins gets up and they brawls! Fans fire up as Lashley has the edge on Rollins! Lashley throws knees, then he throws Rollins out! Lashley goes out but Rollins jumps on him! Lashley RAMS Rollins into barriers, whips him into more barriers, and DC fires up as Rollins comes back for more! They go around, brawling right on the barriers! Referees and security rush out to stop this! Rollins claws Lashley’s face! The fans want to “Let Them Fight!” and Rollins gets free to CLOBBER Lashley!
The brawling keeps going, Adam Pearce tries to stop this, and Lashley stands down while Rollins slides into the ring. Fans sing “OH~ OHH~ OHHH~” and Lashley storms back in! They brawl in the ring again! Lashley RAMS Rollins into a corner! The hands keep flying but management and referees separate them again. Lashley gets loose, Rollins moves, the SPEAR hits one of the producers! Pearce shouts at Lashley and Rollins says Lashley has done it now! Producer Pete Williams is hurting, will Lashley have to face the consequences?
Backstage interview with Austin Theory.
Byron Saxton asks the WWE United States Champion what we just saw in the “absolute chaos” between Rollins and Lashley. Theory says he saw the past. Two former champs are fighting over scraps, oblivious to the fact that the business has evolved and forgotten about both of them. This business lives in the now, where it’s Theory’s time, and he has all the cards! And let’s face it, what’s a couple of challenges to Theory’s reign when the forever is just beginning? But then he turns around into Mustafa Ali! “Forever, huh? Theory, you just love writing checks that you know you can’t cash in. Oh, ‘cash-in,’ you probably don’t like hearing those words.”
Theory says Ali is annoying! He constantly whines and complains about opportunities, then gets beat down. Why doesn’t Ali just quit? Because Ali isn’t like Theory. Ali has to fight for what he has. He has to fight for opportunities! So know this: Theory can put Ali down but he’ll get back up, back in Theory’s face, and become US Champion. Fine! If Ali wants his shot, and his chance to shock the world, then they’ll do this tonight. But after Theory finishes with Ali, Theory never EVER wants to hear the word “opportunity” comes out of Ali’s sorry mouth again. Theory storms off, but will The Beacon bring the end to “The Now” that is Theory’s reign?
Raw checks back in with the JBL Poker Invitational.
Lumis still has fat stacks while the others mull over their hands. JBL has his Ugandan whiskey brought in by the waiter, and gives him a great tip. JBL watches as Corbin’s table moves along. Gable folds, a thank yew. But gentlemen, ladies, the game of poker is about intelligence. The intelligence to know when to push forward, and when to walk away. Gallows says, “NERD!” Gable shouts, “SHOOSH!” “NERD!” “SHOOSH!” This goes back and forth and Corbin has them stop. Take some chill pills. Corbin can’t get a ready on the freak show over here with those two shouting nonsense.
Corbin says Lumis has to be bluffing. He sees through those eyes. Lumis has nothing in his hand, or his head, and Corbin will take all his money and send him back to the loony bin where he belongs. Corbin calls! Corbin has a Straight, 5 through 9! Lumis has… a FULL HOUSE! Three Aces, two Jacks! JBL can’t believe it, either! Corbin says it’s been this way all night! Lumis is some kind of savant. Otis likes croissants. No, savants. Well, those are good, too. Lumis has to be a cheater! No way could he beat Corbin! There have to be cards up his sleeves, in those gloves. Gargano, don’t defend him! Corbin is gonna hand Lumis a-
Lumis has an AX! Whoa, okay, easy now. Corbin and JBL accept Lumis is just that good. Meanwhile, Tozawa is cleaning up on his table! But then Tozawa catches Dom trying to palm a few chips! THIEF!! Thief? This is DOM’S show! Whatever he wants, he gets. And if Tozawa has as problem with that, then the Judgment Day has a problem with Tozawa! Oh, yeah? Well, Tozawa doesn’t care! Dom is the problem. The two stand up, and Dom says Tozawa’s almost as short as his deadbeat dad. JBL has these two settle down. No fighting in the poker room. Go outside if you wanna fight. Tozawa will see Dom in the ring! Yeah he will!
Dom and Tozawa back out of the game for now, but who will be the big winner in the ring?
WWE United States Championship: Austin Theory VS Mustafa Ali!
The self-proclaimed Now of WWE has always had a big ego, and many times that ego has cost him. Will it cost him everything he’s worked for here tonight? Or will Theory leave The Beacon in the dark after this high stakes showdown?
The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who truly represents the future of the WWE!
Fans boo Theory as he and Ali tie up. Theory shoves Ali down and tells him Ali’s wasting his time. Ali comes back to headlock, but Theory powers up. Ali thrashes, Theory powers out and runs Ali over. “What’d I say? You’re wasting your time! You’re in the now.” Theory stands Ali up but Ali puts him in the corner. Ali CHOPS, but Theory just scowls through it. Theory CLOBBERS Ali, brushes himself off, and storms after Ali again. Theory digs his knee into Ali, dares him to do something, but lets off as the ref counts. Theory storms around, whips Ali corner to corner, then he runs in. Ali goes up and over, keeps moving, ducks ‘n’ dodges and tilt-o-whirl RANAS!
Theory bails out but Ali dropkicks him off the apron! Ali builds speed, and he DIVES! Direct hit at the ramp and fans fire up! Ali stalks Theory, brings him up, but Theory breaks free. Theory baits Ali and Ali runs in, Theory POSTS him with an alley-oop! “You’re in the now! You hear me? You’re in the NOW!” Theory RAMS Ali into barriers! Theory asks Ali how that feels while Raw goes to break.
Raw returns and Ali throws haymakers on Theory! Ali backs Theory down to a corner but Theory turns it around. Theory swings but Ali dodges to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP! Ali whips corner to corner, Theory reverses but Ali slips out and ROUNDHOUSES Theory away! Ali slingshots, somersaults, and NECKBREAKERS! Fans fire up but Theory fireman’s carries! Ali slips off to BACKSTABBER! Cover, TWO! Fans rally as Theory crawls to a corner and Ali stands up. Ali storms over, but into an elbow! Theory goes up but Ali ROCKS him first! Ali climbs up after Theory, to SUPER- NO, Theory blocks! Wait, they tip over and Theory still hits the mat!
Theory flounders up, Ali runs in, tilt-o-whirl DDT! Cover, TWO!! Theory survives the rough landing then the rougher impact, but Ali is not losing focus yet. Ali hurries to a corner but Theory anchors a foot. Ali stomps him down then climbs back up. Fans rally but Theory trips Ali up! Theory throws haymakers, puts Ali in a Tree of Woe to the outside, and then Theory stomps away on the apron! The ref counts, Theory backs off, only to go back in for more! The ref counts as Theory stomps away. Theory finally gets in the ring, then he drags Ali up to rain down fists! Fans boo, the ref has Theory back off.
Theory snarls but then DOLPH ZIGGLER SUPERKICKS him!!!
Winner: Austin Theory, by disqualification (still WWE United States Champion)
Ali can’t believe it! Theory wins and it isn’t even because of him! Ali gets mad at Ziggler but Ziggler says his beef is with Theory. Ali and Ziggler argue now, but then Theory CLOBBERS them both! Theory rains down fists on Ziggler, then he drags Ali up to POST him! Fans chant “YOU STILL SUCK!” as Theory drags Ziggler up for A-TOWN DOWN! The Show Off cost Ali and didn’t even get the better of Theory. Will Theory stay the now and become the forever of the WWE?
JBL is on the phone with someone.
He’s loving this! No one could’ve put on a better poker tournament. The money is everywhere! The Miz then walks in and JBL hangs up. JBL is happy to see Miz, and Miz says there was probably a slight oversight not inviting Miz. Oh, sorry, he didn’t know Miz played cards. Miz can jump in, if he has the 50K. Right… About that… After Miz’s “financial improprieties,” he isn’t very liquid. JBL knows how crypto can be, right? But c’mon, JBL knows Miz is good for it! JBL says he’d love to, but Miz hasn’t been good at paying off debts. Everyone had cash on them. Miz can give him his Rolex! Oh, that is a nice watch… Wait. Miz does know this isn’t real, right?
What?! The second hand ticks… Miz is offended and he hurries off. Well, so much for that. Will Miz find a way to get in on the game where a certain you-know-who is playing?
Raw returns and we continue with the poker game.
Corbin says read ’em and weep! Four of a Kind, KINGS! The table can’t believe it, but Corbin says Lady Luck is just on his side. But as Corbin leans over to grab the pot, MORE cards fall out of his sleeve! Corbin accused Lumis and he’s the one cheating?! Corbin says he’s not a cheater, someone put those in there! Styles and Corbin start shoving! JBL stops this, he JUST said no fighting! What is wrong with all of you!? They’re ruining his tournament! Okay then. Corbin, get your gear on and bring the Alphas with you. The OC heads out, will they make Corbin pay for playing dirty? JBL shouts, “What is wrong with these idiots?!”
So… Does Lumis win his table by default? Big tip for the dealer. That was easy! Great job, man! Let’s get this stuff in the bag. Tamina sneaks a few bills for herself. Will Lumis be the big winner by the end of tonight?
Backstage interview with Bianca Belair.
Cathy Kelley asks the RawEST Women’s Champion that Bayley is moving on to next week’s #1 contenders match, against whoever wins the second Triple Threat. How does Bianca feel knowing Bayley will get another opportunity? What Bayley did was impressive, but Bianca knows how to handle Bayley. But Bianca would be proud to face any of the women in the Triple Threat matches, even Rhea Ripley, who could’ve handled the loss more gracefully instead of taking her frustrations out on Bianca’s girl, Asuka. Then who does Bianca see winning the second Triple Threat?
Bianca knows Alexa, Becky and Nikki are all dangerous competitors in their own right. Bianca and Alexa grew closer taking on DMG CTRL, but she knows why Alexa was once champion and running the whole division. Nikki, on the other hand, is just unpredictable that could surprise anyone at anytime. And Becky has challenged Bianca more than any rival ever, but at the end, they have to be ready for Bianca. Bianca stays ready so she doesn’t have to get ready. Will Bianca be ready for whoever it is that comes out the NEW #1 contender?
Six Man Tag: The OC VS Baron Corbin & The Alpha Academy!
AJ Styles and the Good Brothers may not have come out the winners against Judgment Day, but they aren’t about to let JBL’s golden boy get the better of them at poker! Will the Original, Official and ONLY Club that matters be Too Sweet in DC? Or will Chad Gable & Otis help the Modern Day Wrestling God continue his winning ways?
Raw returns as JBL leads the way for his protégé. Corbin makes his entrance, followed by “SHOOOOSH~!” The trios sort out and JBL joins commentary. Corbin and Styles start, they tie up and Corbin knees low! Corbin ROCKS Styles, CLUBS him down, then runs to run Styles over! Fans boo but Corbin soaks up the heat. Corbin drags Styles up but Styles JAWBREAKERS! Styles CHOPS and ROCKS and whips, but Corbin reverses. Styles KICKS Corbin, and hits a DDT! Styles tags Karl but Corbin gets away. Gable tags in, and Gable circles with the Machine Gun. They tie up, Gable waistlocks and spins Karl to a snapmare.
Gable pushes Karl down, facelocks, gator rolls, and he waistlocks to then get a leg. Gable ties the legs up and says, “A THANK YEW~!” Gable floats to a facelock, headlocks, but Karl fights up to power out. Gable runs Karl over, “A THANK YEW~!” Gable runs, Karl drops to then hip toss! Fans fire up as Karl tags Gallows and the Good Brothers double whip. They run Gable over, then Gallows drags Gable up. Gallows wristlocks, Gable endures and rolls to bridge and handspring. Gable spins, breaks free, then says, “SHOOOOSH~!” Gallows says, “NERD~!” They start this up again, “SHOOOSH!” “NERD!” then Gallows UPPERCUTS Gable!
Tag to Karl, Karl brings Gable out but Gable throat chops! Gable bumps Karl off buckles, tags Corbin, and Corbin mugs Karl. Corbin puts Karl in a corner, fires off hands, then tags Otis. Otis RAMS into Karl, and again, and again! Otis picks Karl up to DUMP him down, then he snarls at Gallows. Otis drags Karl around to CLUB him down! Tag to Corbin, they mug Karl, then Corbin CLUBS Karl down. Fans rally but Corbin stands Karl up. Karl ORCKS and CHOPS and ROCKS Corbin again, but Corbin shoves him away. Corbin runs in, Karl moves, but Corbin slides out to slide in and LARIAT! Cover, TWO!
Corbin argues the count but the ref defnds it was just two. Corbin shouts out JBL and JBL cheers Corbin on. Corbin stands Karl up, CLUBS him down, then throws down elbow after elbow! Gable soaks up the heat for Corbin while Otis says that’s hammer time. Fans chant at “BUM ASS CORBIN!” Corbin back suplexes Karl but Karl lands on his feet! Hot tag to Styles! Corbin rushes in but Styles ROCKS him! Styles springboards, but Corbin gets under! Styles rolls through to ELBOW Gable, BLAST Otis, and runs back at Corbin to fire off a Phenomenal Blitz! Corbin flounders, Styles runs, but Gable dumps him out!
Otis CLOBBERS Styles! Fans boo but Gable says, ‘SHOOOOSH~! A THANK YEW~!” Fans boo more but Raw goes to break.
Raw returns again and the Academy stomps a mudhole into Styles! The ref counts, they let off, and Otis drags Styles up. Otis CLUBS Styles, CLUBS him again, then drags Styles up to snapmare. Otis runs to SPLASH! Styles writhes and Otis snarls. Otis drags Styles up again, tags in Corbin, and they mug Styles. Corbin ROCKS Styles with a haymaker, then throws him up and out. Styles shoulders into Corbin, slingshots up and in but Corbin DECKS Styles out of the air! Cover, TWO! Corbin rains down fists while JBL talks down on the “flippy floppy” styles. Corbin puts Styles in the corner, tag to Gable, and the mugging continues.
Gable snapmares Styles and has a mounted armlock. Gable steps over to wrench the arm, fans rally up and Styles fight sup. Styles throws haymakers and reaches out, but Gable keeps him from the Good Brothers. Styles throws more hands but Gable throws him down! Gable BLASTS Karl, then tells Gallows to “SHOOSH~!” Gable drags Styles up, reels him in but Styles back drops! Hot tag to Gallows! But the ref was busy with an angry Karl! He says Gallows isn’t legal! Gable drags Styles up, and feeds him to a DEEP SIX!! Gable covers, TWO!! Styles survives and Gable is stunned! Tag to Otis, the Alphas drag Styles up to put him in a corner.
Otis SPLASHES, then whips Styles corner to corner. Otis runs in but Styles dodges to PELE! Down goes Otis! Fans fire up as Styles crawls, hot tags to Gable and Karl! Karl rallies on Gable, scoops him and SLAMS him! Karl runs to drop a SENTON! Then he BLASTS Corbin off the apron! Gable runs in, into a BOOT! Karl goes up, FLYING NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Fans fire up as Karl drags Gable up to fireman’s carry. Gable fights off, shoves, dodges, but Gable rolls to pick the leg to an ANKLE LOCK! Karl rolls to throw him away! Gable goes up, leaps, but into a SPINEBUSTER! Cover, Corbin breaks it!
Styles runs in, but into a CHOKE SLAM BACKBRAEKER! Corbin ELBOWS Gallows, puts Karl in a corner, and then he runs. Karl moves, Corbin slides out, but slides into a SLIDING FOREARM! Gallows BOOTS Corbin for good measures! Otis ROCKS Gallows, scoops him and EXPLODERS! Fans fire up as Styles PHENOMENAL FOREARMS Otis!! Gable gets in to GERMAN SUPLEX Styles! Karl waistlocks, Gable victory rolls, TWO!! Gable ROCKS Karl, Karl ROCKS Gable! ROLLING ELBOW from Gable! UPPERCUT from Karl! Both men are down and DC fires up again! Even JBL admits “This is Awesome!”
Karl crawls to tag in Gallows! Gable avoids Karl, O’Conner Rolls, but Gallows tips it over! Gallows kicks Gable, he and Anderson hit MAGIC KILLER!! Cover, The OC wins!!
Winners: The OC, by pinfall
JBL claims cheating, but he clearly missed a move or two. The OC wins fair and square, unlike Corbin. Will Styles & The Good Brothers turn their fortunes around and take over Raw?
Backstage interview with Candice LeRae.
Byron congratulates her on a victorious return to the ring last week, beating Dakota Kai. And because of that win, Candice has to face the other half of the WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions, Iyo Sky. Does Candice feel that now she’s a marked woman by DMG CTRL? Absolutely. She may be new to Raw but she’s known all those women a long time. Last week, Candice returned from an injury they were responsible for, so she had to send a message. Yes, Candice is here with burnt pixie wings, but she’s also a new mom. She has so much to fight for now. She won’t let anyone push her around. But little does she know, Nikki Cross is spying on Candice…
But then Johnny Gargano walks over to say hi to the wifey. She says hi to hubby, and how did poker go? Lumis won! He killed it! Look at all the money! WHAT THE- Uh… Sorry. Candice hates to be that person, but this is a lot of money. They’re gonna go now. What will The Garganos and Lumis do with that huge amount of money? And what is Nikki plotting for the Poison Pixie?
Dominik Mysterio w/ The Judgment Day VS Akira Tozawa!
The rebellious son of Rey Mysterio thinks Raw belongs to him now, but pretty much everyone outside the Judgment Day disagrees. Will the Stamina Monster prove Dom can’t do whatever he wants? Or will he end up just another victim?
The bell rings and Dom circles with Tozawa. Tozawa dodges Dom to SOBAT, but Dom ducks the spin kick! Tozawa slides under to ROLLING ELBOW! Dom staggers, Tozawa whips, but Dom stops. They kick each other, Tozawa fires off more hands, then he whips Dom to a corner. Dom reverses, runs in, but Tozawa boots him away. Tozawa goes up, leaps and RANAS Dom to the other side! Fans fire up with Tozawa but Dom stays back. Dom wants mercy, but then he YANKS Tozawa into buckles! Dom stomps a mudhole into Tozawa and the Judgment Day cheers while fans boo. Dom drags Tozawa up to snap suplex !U no Amigo!
Fans boo as Dom snap suplexes again, Dos Amigos! Dom gives some Latino Heat before THREE AMIGOS! Cover, ONE!! Fans rally but Dom clamps on with a chinlock. Tozawa fights up but Dom CLUBS him. Dom whips, Tozawa pops up to RANA again! And then SHINING WIZARD! Cover, TWO!! Dom survives and Judgment Day gets worried. Tozawa CLUBS Dom, whips, but Dom reverses. Tozawa BOOTS Dom down, then waits on Dom to get up. Roll-up, BUZZSAW! Dom is dazed, Tozawa drags him to a drop zone. Fans fire up as Tozawa climbs! Rhea shouts at Dom to get moving, Tozawa leaps! SUPER SENTON FLOPS as Dom moves!
Rhea and the Judgment Day laugh, Dom drags Tozawa into a drop zone. Dom climbs up now, gives Latino Heat before the FROG SPLASH! Cover, Dom wins!
Winner: Dominik Mysterio, by pinfall
The Judgment Day is proud of their boy, but Dom drags Tozawa up. Fans boo but here come the Street Profits! Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins rush out to run the Judgment Day off. Finn, Dom, Priest & Rhea don’t sweat the Profits, but will they cross paths down the road all the same?
Adam Pearce finds Bobby Lashley backstage.
Pearce tells Lashley they need to talk about what happened earlier tonight. Lashley can’t hit one of Pearce’s officials. That Spear damn near cut Pete Williams in half. Lashley chuckles but then sees Pearce is serious. Yes, he’s serious! It’s a problem that they can’t have happen. Now, Pearce knows it was an accident, he was there to see it. He’s not going to punish Lashley or take away the #1 contender’s match. But if it happens again… Or what, Pearce? Well, put yourself in his position. If it happens again, Pearce’s hands are tied, and he doesn’t want it to happen. Lashley says if one of the cronies gets in the lion’s den and gets mauled by a lion, the lion gets punished?
No, that’s not what he means. Pearce knows this was an accident, but he just wants Lashley to be careful not to have another one. Then make sure no one stands in Lashley’s way. Lashley leaves, will he be able to focus on just Rollins next week?
Triple Threat: Becky Lynch VS Alexa Bliss VS Nikki Cross!
The Man made a big time promise, but she has to make it through both the Five Foot Fury and the No Longer a Superhero. Bayley awaits the winner, who is heading to Milwaukee for that #1 contenders match?
Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (12/5/22)
Indianapolis gets Elevated!
Elevation turns it up to nine!
AEW is racing towards Winter is Coming in Indianapolis as The Embassy is in action! Who betta than Brian Cage & The Gates of Agony?
- Nick Comoroto w/ Aaron Solo VS Hagane Shinno; Shinno wins.
- Nyla Rose & Marina Shafir w/ Vickie Guerrero VS Kitty LaFleur & Alice Crowley; Nyla & Shafir win.
- Kiera Hogan VS Nikki Victory; Kiera wins.
- Top Flight VS Truth Magnum & Turbo Floyd; Top Flight wins.
- Madison Rayne VS Emi Sakura; Sakura wins.
- Lee Moriarty w/ W. Morrissey VS Serpentico w/ Luther; Moriarty wins.
- Six Man Tag: The Embassy w/ Prince Nana VS Dan Adams, Star Rider & Façade; The Embassy wins.
- Alex Reynolds w/ John Silver VS Kip Sabian w/ Penelope Ford; Kip wins.
- Konosuke Takeshita VS Aaron Solo w/ Nick Comoroto; Konosuke wins.
A decent line-up. Good to see Top Flight in action after hearing Dante Martin was really hurting after that match with FTR. Good to see Konosuke in action. Reynolds VS Sabian could be a really good one, too. And good to see Kiera Hogan in action now that she’s on her own again. Wouldn’t surprise me if she and Diamante team up to go after The Baddies.
Down The Wire: Fickell Rhules
The brothers Wortz return to spice up your earballs with some brotherly love for the holidays!
Cook’s 2022 NFL Gambling Picks: Week 13
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Down The Wire: NFL No Cap Recap Week 12
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Down The Wire: World Cup, Turkey Day Lineup
The brothers Wortz are back to talk World Cup, their Turkey Day lineup and Zach Wilson.
Cook’s 2022 NFL Gambling Picks: Week 12
NFL Week 12 kicks off with a trio of Thanksgiving Day games! Steve Cook has all of your picks for...
Bandwagon Nerds #160: Changes Bob Iger Style
Patrick O’Dowd, PC Tunney, and Rey Cash revisit the leadership changes at Disney and how Bob Iger has already made...
Andrew’s Judgmental Album Reviews: Halestorm – Back From The Dead (2022)
So the JAR is checking the pulse on Halestorm's Back From The Dead, from earlier in the year. Are they...
Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News Report! (12/1/22)
Get ready for New Year's Eve!
New Force Order – A Star Wars Podcast: Rip Don Winkle
Is Yoda legitimately dyslexic? That and many more hard hitting questions answered on this edition of New Force Order!
Chairshot Radio The 5×5: Disney Park Attractions
The 5×5 is back this week on Chairshot Radio. Fresh from his vacation at Disneyworld, Patrick O’Dowd welcomes David Ungar...
Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (12/5/22)
Who will be The Ones?
Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (12/5/22)
Indianapolis gets Elevated!
Mitchell’s NJPW WTL X Super Jr. Tag Results & Report! (12/4/22)
Can Catch 2/2 get 2 more points?
Mitchell’s NJPW WTL X Super Jr. Tag Results & Report! (12/3/22)
Is World Tag League tranquilo?
(NOAH) NOAH NEWSLETTER VOL.192 ~ 30TH NOVEMBER 2022
NOAH ends November with some big announcements! Returns, new debuts and surprising challenges!
DWI Podcast #351: How Silky Are You
This week we discuss War Games and Roman's hatred for red pants!
Mitchell’s NJPW WTL X Super Jr. Tag Results & Report! (12/2/22)
Another MASSIVE combined card!
Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (12/2/22)
Orange Cassidy is on a Rampage!
Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (12/2/22)
The SmackDown World Cup finals are here!
Mindless Wrestling Podcast: WAR GAMES! (WWE Survivor Series 2022 Review)
WWE Survivor Series War Games is in the books--and did not disappoint! Hear what the Mindless crew really thinks about...