It’s a Dark Dozen tonight for AEW!
Before going 5v5 this Wednesday, the Inner Circle, Best Friends and Orange Cassidy are all in action! Which side gathers momentum before Dynamite?
- Brandon Cutler & Peter Avalon w/ Leva Bates VS FTR; FTR wins.
- Joey Janela & Sonny Kiss VS Michael Nakazawa & “Pineapple Pete” Suge D; Janela & Kiss win.
- Abadon VS Skyler Moore; Abadon wins.
- The Dark Order’s Evil Uno & Stu Grayson VS Shawn Dean & Will Hobbs; Uno & Grayson win.
- Scorpio Sky VS Corey Hollis; Scorpio wins.
- Penelope Ford w/ Kip Sabian VS Kenzie Paige; Ford wins.
- Wardlow VS Aaron Solow; Wardlow wins.
- Best Friends VS The Dark Order’s Numbers 3 & 4; Best Friends win.
- Lance Archer VS Frankie Thomas; Archer wins.
- Orange Cassidy VS Serpentico; Cassidy wins.
- Sammy Guevara VS Fuego Del Sol; Guevara wins.
- Triple Threat Tag: SoCal Uncensored VS Proud ‘n’ Powerful VS Private Party; Proud ‘n’ Powerful wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
Brandon Cutler & Peter Avalon w/ Leva Bates VS FTR!
The Dungeon Master and the Librarian have truly become a team, because they have a team name! They are The Initiative! Will they take the initiative and finally get a win? Or will Cash Wheeler and Dax Harwood keep them completely winless?
The Young Bucks are watching from ringside again to continue supporting their pal in Cutler. The teams sort out, Cash starts against Avalon. They tie up, go around as Tully Blanchard is also watching, and Avalon gets away as Dax tags in. Cash gives Dax some tips and Dax circles with Avalon. They tie up, Dax headlocks to the takeover but Avalon keeps his shoulders up. Avalon fights his way up, powers out but Dax runs him over. Avalon scrambles up, tag to Cutler. Dax and Cash talk again, Dax circles with Cutler. Cash swipes at Cutler and Dax clubs Cutler from behind! Dax bumps Cutler off buckles and CHOPS! Tag to Cash and Dax feeds Cutler to Cash’s knees! Cash brings Cutler up for European Uppercuts and CHOPS!
Cash whips corner to corner, Cutler goes up but gets caught and put on the apron. Cutler blocks the bump to give the bump then springboards to forearm! Cutler drags Cash over to tag in Avalon. They double whip and double flapjack! They push Cash down, Cutler runs, elbow drop and splash combo! Avalon covers, ONE! Avalon keeps on Cash with a wristlock and tags in Cutler. Cutler takes the hand-off and wrenches, but Cash rolls. Cutler keeps on the wrist to keep Cash from Dax, but Dax tags Cash’s foot. The ref says that’s not a legal tag, but Cash rakes Cutler’s eyes in the confusion! Tag to Dax, FTR double suplex to hang Cutler out to dry! Dax drops a leg, an elbow, and a headbutt! Cover, TWO! Cutler gets to ropes but Dax stomps his hands!
Dax hooks Cutler’s nose then drives an elbow into the forehead. Dax drags Cutler up, whips and back elbows Cutler down! Tag to Cash, FTR drag Cutler up to guillotine catapult him in the ropes! Avalon distracts the ref as Cash covers, ONE! Cash drags Cutler up, snapmares him and wraps on a headlock. Cash grinds Cutler down but the crowd rallies up. Cutler endures, fights up, and lifts. Cash holds on but Cutler throws him off to get him for the back suplex after all! Both men are down, Dax tags in and intercepts Cutler to throw him out of the ring! Culter is on the apron, Dax gets him between the ropes to forearm, kick, and repeat! The ref counts, Dax lets up but Cash gets a cheap shot! Cutler flops into a corner and Leva reprimands Dax. Dax grabs her book and throws it away!
Cutler throws haymakers but Dax back suplexes him down! Dax tags Cash and FTR drags Cutler up. Cash throws forearms, bumps him off buckles then grabs another book from Leva! He TEARS it! Cash runs at Cutler but Cutler dodges, Cash’s leap only gets buckles! Both men are down and the crowd rallies up! Hot tags to Dax and Avalon! Avalon springboards and crossbodies Dax! Enziguri for Cash! Avalon CHOPS and whips Dax, Dax reverses but run sinto an enziguri! Arabian Moonsault! Cover, Cash breaks it! Cutler throws hands on Cash but Cash dumps Cutler out hard! Avalon dropkicks Cash out, whips Dax but Dax reverses to wrench and LARIAT! Both men are down but Dax sits up with a scowl on his face. Tag to Cash, Cash climbs up, MIND BREAKER! Cover, FTR wins!
Winner: FTR, by pinfall
They didn’t always #FollowTheRules, but Cash and Dax did impress Tully. FTR shake hands with Bucks out of respect and sportsmanship. Will these two teams meet in the ring for that dream match everyone’s after?
Joey Janela & Sonny Kiss VS Michael Nakazawa & “Pineapple Pete” Suge D!
Jersey’s Finest returns to action! But will they slip up against this new combination of the Turkish Oil Master and Sugar Dunkerton?
The teams sort out and Kiss starts against Nakazawa. Kiss dropkicks Nakazawa then huricanranas! Kiss runs corner to corner, Nakazawa dodges and rolls but runs into an elbow! Kiss goes up, headscissors, but Nakazawa blocks the twerk! Nakazawa brings out the oil! But the Bad Boy gets in to take that bottle away! To spray it all over Kiss?! Seems Janela just wanted to do the honors. Nakazawa still gets the Kiss My Sass! Taz can’t even on commentary right now. Kiss handsprings but slips to the splits because of the oil slick! Nakazawa boots Kiss in the back! Nakazawa drags Kiss up and whips him to the corner, then uppercuts! Tag to Suge and Suge brings out a bottle of his own! Suge has become the Turkish Oil Apprentice!
Suge oils up Nakazawa and himself, then runs corner to corner. He uses Nakazawa as a Slip ‘n’ Slide to RAM into Kiss! Suge is pumped and he jumps to hug Nakazawa, only to slip right off! Master and apprentice argue but Kiss hot tags Janela! Janela climbs up top, and leaps at Suge and Nakazawa with a double missile dropkick! Janela brings Suge up, tags in Kiss, then wrenches to the Russian Leg Sweep! Janela sits Suge up for Kiss’ SUPERKICK! Cover, TWO! Kiss drags Suge up, whips to a corner, then runs in to back kick! Kiss goes to the apron, pushes Suge out and springboard, but Suge gets under! Suge baits Kiss in, goes up and over to ram Kiss again. Suge cravats and KNEES, then LARIATS! Cover, TWO!
Suge keeps on Kiss with a mounted chinlock then shifts to a facelock. The crowd rallies, Kiss rolls, Suge tags in Janela? That doesn’t work like that. Suge pushes Kiss to the other corner and tags in Nakazawa. Master and apprentice double suplex but Kiss slips out! Tag to Janela and he rallies on Nakazawa and Suge! Janela whips Nakazawa into Suge but that counts as a tag! Nakazawa runs at Janela but Janela turns him around to German Suplex into the buckles! Suge runs in but Janela throws him down onto Nakazawa! Janela brings Suge up, fireman’s carry, rolling Death Valley and basement dropkick! Janela builds speed to DIVE out onto Nakazawa! Nakazawa gets driven into barriers, Janela goes up top, FLYING SPLASH! Cover, but Nakazawa breaks it up!
Nakazawa clubs Janela, drags him back up but Janela ROCKS him with a right! Janela drags Suge back up, Suge throws fast hands and ROCKS Janela back! Suge talks trash, Janela ROCKS him back! Suge wobbles but Nakazawa has primed the hot pink jock strap! Janela blocks the Nasty Claw! But Suge FAST BALLS! Nakazawa tries again but Janela deflects the undies into SUGE! Janela SUPERKICKS Nakazawa down! BUZZSAW for Suge! Tag to Kiss, Kiss goes up top, FLYING SPLITS! Cover, Jersey’s Finest wins!
Winners: Joey Janela & Sonny Kiss, by pinfall
They’re back in action and back on top! Will Janela and Kiss keep going on this wild ride all the way to the top?
Abadon VS Skyler Moore!
Something wicked this way comes as Abadon returns to action! Will Skyler survive this real-life scary movie?
The bell rings and Moore is very wary of Abadon. Moore forces herself to tie up but Abadon tackles her down! Abadon hammers away wildly then screams at the ref when he reprimands her. Moore rakes Abadon’s good(?) eye and thrashes her at the ropes! Moore lets up at 4 to go after Abadon’s face again! Abadon yells but Moore throws forearms. Moore whips, Abadon ducks and LARIATS! Abadon laughs as she looms over Moore. Abadon drags Moore up but Moore hits back! Moore throws forearm after forearm then kicks. Moore hits a DDT, but she doesn’t cover! Abadon sits up like a certain Deadman and fixes her neck! Moore freaks out and bails out of the ring!
Abadon chases her down at the railing and clubs away! But Moore fights back! Moore throws Abadon into barriers! Moore hears the ring count, mocks it, then brings Abadon up to throw more forearms. Moore puts Abadon back in the ring, feeling brave suddenly. She drags Abadon up and scoops, for a POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Moore can’t believe it, but she keeps on Abadon with a gut wrench. Abadon slips out, Gory Especial, WIDOW’S PEAK!! Cover, Abadon wins!
Winner: Abadon, by pinfall
Another win for the living nightmare! Will anyone be able to stand up and stop Abadon’s horror show?
Shawn Spears speaks.
“So why the glove?” He can understand the questions. What he can’t understand is the negative and uninformed comments people throw his way that are really only insights to the kind of people they really are. “You think you know my industry? Okay, well, here it is. Your world is safe. You’re the master of your own domain, you’re the lion, you’re the king of your own jungle.” But his world is different. “There are countless hyenas masquerading as lions and they’re always looking for their next meal.” They are willing to do anything and take everything you’ve worked for. So what would anyone do in that situation?
The definition of self-defense is the “defense of one’s person or interests, through the act of physical force, which is permitted in certain cases as an answer to a violent act.” Spears hopes you understand it was never his intention to hurt someone. This glove is the one thing that will never turn its back on him, the one thing he can rely on, and the one thing that will always be there for him when he needs it. The glove is not a weapon. “It’s my protector.” How far will Spears go to “protect” himself?
The Dark Order’s Evil Uno & Stu Grayson VS Shawn Dean & Will Hobbs!
The original members of AEW’s resident cult are preparing for their moment! Tomorrow night’s Dynamite will finally see Uno and Stu challenge for THE AEW World Tag Team Championships! Are The Captain and the Embodiment of Will Power serve as appetizers for that golden feast?
Naturally, the Numbers follow Uno and Grayson out and stand on stage. The teams sort out, and Grayson immediately rushes Dean! Grayson keeps hitting Dean, brings him up and tackles him to the corner. Uno tags in, CHOPS and clubs Dean down, then throws haymakers. Uno drags Dean up, whips him to ropes and elbows him down. Uno taunts Hobbs then drags Dean back up. Uno bumps Dean on buckles, tags in Grayson and throws him in to RAM Dean’s stomach! Grayson snapmares and KICKS Dean down. Tag back to Uno, Uno drags Dean up and throws elbows. Uno whips Dean back into the corner, but Dean throws forearms and haymakers! Dean kicks, Uno blocks, but Dean enziguris!
Grayson tags in and keeps Dean from Hobbs. Dean boots Grayson away but runs into a HUGE urenage! Cover, TWO! Grayson drags Dean up, feeds him to Uno’s boot then tags Uno back in. Uno CHOPS Dean again, then brings him back up for a back suplex! The crowd rallies for Dean but Uno brushes off his shoulders. Uno drags Dean up, throws haymakers, then slaps Dean around. Dean throws forearms back! ANd an uppercut! Grayson tags in, Uno reels Dean in but Dean kicks free. Dean swings into a scoop, springboard elbow sidewalk slam! Grayson pushes Hobbs but the ref keeps Hobbs back. Grayson tags Uno in, Uno dropkicks Hobbs off the apron! Uno swaggers about before he whips Dean. Dean reverses, spins through and hits a neckbreaker! But Hobbs is still down and Grayson tags in!
Grayson goes up but Dean dropkicks the springboard down! Dean builds speed to FLY out onto Grayson! The crowd rallies as Dean gets up. Dean gets in the ring, dodges Uno and hot tags Hobbs! Hobbs rallies and leaps to lariat! Hobbs misses Uno in the corner but gives him a SPINE BUSTER! Grayson returns, QUEBRADA, but Hobbs catches him! Hobbs runs to RAM Grayson into a buckle, Oklahoma Stampede to the other side! Then the POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Grayson survives but Hobbs tags in Dean. Hobbs and Dean bring Grayson up, Grayson double PELES! Tag to Uno, the Dark Order go after Hobbs.
Hobbs resists the lift but Uno boots him. Uno blocks Dean’s kick to send it into Hobbs! Grayson KNEES Dean down! Uno and Grayson hit Hobbs with a boot and a knee together! Grayson powers HObbs up with a torture rack for the NIGHTFALL! Uno has Dean, tags in Grayson, FATALITY!! Cover, The Dark Order wins!
Winners: The Dark Order, by pinfall
The #1 contenders are rolling into their tag title match! Will the AEW World Tag Team Championships #JoinDarkOrder?
Scorpio Sky VS Corey Hollis!
The Closer takes on The Original as the hot streak continues! Will Scorpio continue to #ReachForTheSky as the summer heats up?
The bell rings and Scorpio circles with Hollis. They tie up, are in a deadlock, but Scorpio powers Hollis to a corner. Scorpio backs off and circles with Hollis again. Hollis gets a leg, Scorpio hobbles to stay up but Hollis shifts to a waistlock. Hollis headlocks, wrenches, shoulder breaker and hammerlock. Scorpio switches the hammerlock but Hollis switches back. Scorpio rolls Hollis up, ONE! The crowd cheers the exchange as Scorpio and Hollis go again. Scorpio headlocks, Hollis powers out and things speed up. Hollis jumps into a Manhattan drop! Scorpio brings Hollis around, Russian Leg Sweep! Cover, TWO! Hollis gets to a corner but Scorpio is on him with EuroUppers.
Scorpio follows Hollis to corners with those EuroUppers, then wrenches and whips to dropkick Hollis down! Hollis bails out as the crowd cheers. Scorpio slingshots, Hollis moves but Scorpio abandons the Pescado, only for Hollis to trip him up! Scorpio clutches the knee, Hollis climbs up top, and Hollis leaps to flying knee Scorpio down! Cover, TWO! Hollis grows frustrated but he dropkicks Scorpio against the ropes! Scorpio gets to a corner, Hollis stomps a mudhole into him. The ref counts, Hollis stops at 3 and Scorpio gets up. Hollis whips, Scorpio reverses and redirecits, but he runs into Hollis’ boots! Hollis goes up and springboards to enziguri! Cover, TWO!
Hollis grits his teeth as he glares at Scorpio. The crowd rallies up as Hollis watches Scorpio. Hollis cravats, Scorpio turns around to hook the arms, but Hollis slips out to waistlock. O’Conner roll, TWO, Hollis rebounds but into Scorpio’s cradle! TWO, and Scorpio BOOTS Hollis down! Cover, TWO! Hollis survives and Scorpio is a bit surprised. Scorpio keeps his focus, brings Hollis back up, inside fisherman but Hollis Stun-Dog Millionaires back! LARIAT! Hollis doesn’t cover, he goes to the corner and to the top rope! Hollis Frog Splashes into BOOTS! Scorpio brings Hollis up, T K O!! Cover, Scorpio wins!
Winner: Scorpio Sky, by pinfall
The streak continues! Scorpio got quite the fight out of Hollis but he will not be defeated so easily! Will Scorpio reach for some gold in the near future?
Penelope Ford w/ Kip Sabian VS Kenzie Paige!
The Superbad Girl wants to climb back up and get another shot at the AEW Women’s World Championship, but she’ll have to get through the Real Mean Girl first! Will Kenzie be a speed bump on Ford’s road back to contention?
The bell rings and Kenzie circles with Ford. They approach and Ford kicks low to club Kenzie on the back. Ford knees Kenzie to a corner, whips her corner to corner then runs in to clothesline! Ford back elbows then whips again, redirects Kenzie and CLOBBERS her from behind! Ford throws Kenzie by her hair, the ref reprimands, but Ford brings Kenzie back up. Ford whips again, runs in but Kenzie boots back! Kenzie clobbers Ford in return! Kenzie ducks Ford to throw her down! Kenzie rains down furious fists but Ford pushes her away. Ford flounders to a corner, Kenzie runs in but a drop toehold sends her into buckles! Ford throws Kenzie into buckles again, then brings her up to SLAP her down!
The ref reprimands but Ford tells Kenzie not to pull hair. Ford clubs Kenzie, puts her on ropes and chokes her! The ref counts, Kip gives Ford a kiss, then Ford YANKS Kenzie into the ropes! Ford stomps Kenzie around and wraps her up in a Camel Clutch! Kenzie endures while Ford sneaks in some fish hooks, but Kenzie fights up. Ford CLUBS Kenzie down, then brings her up to DECK her! Ford fireman’s carries Kenzie and dumps her for a GUT BUSTER! Kip loves what he sees from his Superbad fiance, but Kenzie jawbreakers back! Ford goes Matrix, STUNNER! Ford drags Kenzie back up, but Kenzie throws body shots and forearms! Kenzie fires up, Ford ducks to DECK her again! Ford runs, into a SUPERKICK!
Kenzie fires up, spins Ford around to a full nelson, but Ford spins out! Ford shoves Kenzie and BOOTS her down on the rebound! Ford handsprings, into another STUNNER! Cover, but Ford lets up. She wants a better one, and hits the PERFECT PLEX! Cover, Ford wins!
Winner: Penelope Ford, by pinfall
That was one Superbad and super mean win over the Real Mean Girl. Kip celebrates with Ford, will they both be heading for title shots in the near future?
Wardlow VS Aaron Solow!
Maxwell Jacob Friedman’s muscle wants to keep going strong in his own AEW win-loss record. Will he make minced meat of the man from San Fran?
The bell rings and Wardlow grins at Solow as he flexes the pecs. Solow gets around Wardlow and clubs him, but Wardlow doesn’t flinch. Wardlow puts Solow in a corner, slaps him around, then swings. Solow dodges, fires off kicks then runs, but into a BOOT! Wardlow seethes, drags Solow up, and RAMS him into a corner! Wardlow RAMS again, then has Solow on the ropes as he EuroUppers him! Solow flops down, Wardlow paces and brings Solow back up. Wardlow whips Solow corner to corner hard! Solow hits buckles then the mat, and Wardlow storms over. Wardlow RAMS into Solow again, throws another EuroUpper, then drags him up.
Wardlow whips corner to corner again, Solow stays standing this time, and Wardlow runs corner to corner. Solow BOOTS, enziguris, mule kicks, SUPERKICKS, and spins, into Wardlow’s arms! Wardlow swings and SLAMS Solow down! Wardlow just smiles after taking all those shots and brings Solow back up. Solow wobbles, Wardlow reels back and CLOBBERS him! Wardlow drags Solow up again, wants the cameras to see this as he puts Solow up top. Wardlow says thumbs down, FALLING KNEE SMASH! Solow is OUT, Wardlow wins!
Winner: Wardlow, by referee stoppage
Wardlow gets a knockout win, that is how brutal he can be. But he isn’t satisfied, either! Wardlow drags Solow up, for the F10!! And then ANOTHER!! Solow is down but the War Dog continues on his warpath! Will he steamroll through anyone and everyone to become a champion?
Best Friends VS The Dark Order’s Numbers 3 & 4!
We saw Uno and Grayson win, now it’s up to John Silver and Alex Reynolds to keep The Exalted One pleased with their results. But with a battle against The Inner Circle coming, will Chuck Taylor and Trent fight to gain momentum?
Just as the Numbers did for Uno and Grayson, Uno and Grayson stand with the Numbers to support the Beaver Boys. But as Best Friends get in the ring, they get jumped! Silver stomps Trent while Reynolds boots Chuckie T. Then they trade and Silver stomps Chuck down. The ref reprimands but Reynolds punches away on Trent and Silver whips Chuck into barriers! Chuck throws Silver into railing in return! Trent hits railing again but comes back to SPEAR Reynolds! Chuck dumdum stomps Silver down from the apron! Best Friends regroup, put Reynolds back in, and give Reynolds a Sexy Chuckie Knee! Sole Food to Half ‘n’ Half! Best Friends HUG!! Trent grabs Reynolds, Chuckie goes up top, but Silver BOOTS Trent and helps Reynolds get a sunset flip powerbomb!
Silver BOOTS Chuck off the top, down goes as camera man! The Beaver Boys focus on Trent, whip to a corner and a roundhouse, rolling elbow, enziguri, GERMAN SUPLEX! Jackknife cover, TWO!! Trent survives that Beaver Boy blitz but Silver tags in. Silver stomps Trent down then throws forearms. Cover, TWO! The Numbers keep their cool as Uno coaches them. Silver brings Trent up to ROUNDHOUSE him down! Trent sits up but Silver boots him! Cover, TWO! Silver drags Trent up, tags Reynolds in, and they mug Trent. Reynolds throws EuroUppers and then clinches to knee and throw Trent down. Reynolds tops it off with a boot! Uno and Grayson applaud but no one else does. Reynolds whips Ternt to a corner, runs in but only gets buckles!
Trent hits a tornado but not the DDT! Trent dodges Reynolds to boots him back! Trent hops up, Reynolds trips him! Cover, TWO! Reynolds drags Trent away to tag in Silver. Silver stands on Trent’s head but the ref counts. Silver lets up at 4 to double gun on ’em. Chuck and the crowd rally but Silver bumps Trent off buckles. Trent CHOPS back but Silver RAMS him into the corner! Silver rams in more, then whips Trent corner to corner! Trent tumbles up and back, into Silver’s lift. Silver runs and SLAMS Trent down! Cover, ROPEBREAK! Silver seethes but he drags Trent back up, tags in Reynolds but Trent pushes away. Silver trophy lifts for Reynolds’ CUTTER! Cover, Chuckie breaks it! Reynolds goes after Chuck and throws him out, then brings Trent back to the Dark Order corner.
Tag to Silver, they stomp Trent down and take their time with him. Trent sits up to get a KICK from Silver! Silver paces but Trent eggs him on. Silver KICKS, KICKS but Trent fires up! Trent throws forearms and Silver gives them back! They brawl, Trent catches the kick but Silver throws haymakers! Silver runs, into Trent’s LARIAT! Trent and Silver stagger, Reynolds tags in but is dumped out! Trent crawls, Reynolds trips up Chuckie T! And snap suplexes him to the floor! Reynolds gets Trent again, waistlock to a GERMAN SUPLEX! Silver drags Trent up for a GERMAN SUPLEX! Reynolds BOOTS Trent in the corner, and then the Beaver Boys double torture rack for the DOUBLE INVERTED DEATH VALLEY! Cover, TWO!! Trent lives and Uno can’t believe it!
Reynolds tags in, drags Trent up, but Trent SAIDOS back! Reynolds and Trent crawl, hot tags to Silver and Chuckie T! The Kentucky Gentleman rallies on the Beaver Boys! Pop up and dropkick for Reynolds! Chuckie grabs Silver to whip but Silver reverses. Silver whips Reynolds in but Chuckie goes up and over! Chuckie overhead suplexes Silver ONTO Reynolds! Chuckie brings Silver up to FALCON ARROW! Cover, TWO!! Chuckie can’t believe it, but he won’t let it slow him down. Chuckie goes up top, Reynolds throws haymakers to stop him then climbs up to join him. Trent goes after Reynolds in return, SUPER GERMAN SUPLEX!! Silver runs into Chuckie’s backslide! Silver slips out, kicks and kicks and SUPERKICKS! But Chuckie slips out of the suplex for AWFUL WAFFLE!! Cover, Best Friends win!
Winners: Best Friends, by pinfall
The Numbers have failed and that upsets Uno and Grayson. Trent and Chuck are ready for the 10 Man, but the Dark Order rushes the ring! Best Friends get away and then hug! Will Best Friends, Orange Cassidy and Jurassic Express all be hugging in victory after facing Le Champion’s legion?
Lance Archer w/ Jake The Snake Roberts VS Frankie Thomas!
The Murderhawk Monster mauled a random assortment of wrestlers in the locker room without remorse! Will he continue to do that tonight? Or does “Mr. Superkick” have a trick up his sleeve to stop the devastation?
Speaking of random wrestlers, Archer drags out another one and dumps him on the ramp! But Frankie isn’t afraid, he walks up and kicks Archer! The bell rings, Archer pie faces Frankie. Frankie throws forearms but Archer throws him to a corner! Archer corner clotheslines, then runs corner to corner but Frankie dodges. Frankie headlocks but Archer powers out to DERAIL him! Archer drags Frankie up to choke on the ropes with one arm! The ref counts, Archer lets up to then CLUB Frankie down. Archer brings Frankie up and suplex TOSSES him! Archer grins at the camera, “Everybody in AEW, I’m coming for you!” Archer goes to Frankie, reels him in and LARIATS him down! Archer warns the wrestlers in the crowd, such as Lee Johnson, an earlier “victim.”
Archer choke grips but Frankie slips out to kick away. Archer shoves, Frankie throws forearms then slides. Archer avoids the trip but Frankie plays some cat ‘n’ mouse, and slingshots, into Archer’s hands! Archer overhead TOSSES Frankie, then BLASTS the one guy he already mauled! Archer puts Frankie back in the ring, kicks him while he’s down, then looms over him. Frankie gets up for Archer to CLUB him down! Archer drags Frankie up, puts him in a corner and looks into the camera as he chokes Frankie. The ref counts, Archer lets off at 4 and goes back to Frankie. Archer whips, scoops but Frankie slips out to a sleeper hold! Frankie is a backpack but he’s rammed into buckles. Frankie boots back but Archer fires off furious CHOPS!
Archer drags Frankie out in the inverted crucifix, but Frankie escapes! Frankie dodges but then Archer clamps on, HUGE CHOKE SLAM! EBD Claw!! Archer dribbles Frankie, covers him, and wins!
Winner: Lance Archer, by pinfall
Another one bites the dust and Archer is just building momentum! Will Archer not stop until #EverybodyDies?
Orange Cassidy VS Serpentico!
Ironically, this is the real SNAKE MAN, not the one who attacked Jurassic Express last week. That was Sammy Guevara in disguise. But can The Sloth still prepare for the Inner Circle by taking on the real Serpentico?
Cassidy takes his time taking off his jacket and shirt, mostly because he doesn’t have Best Friends to help him with that. The bell rings and Serpentico rushes Cassidy, but then misses. Cassidy steps over him, hands in pockets, and seems to let Serpentico have a shot. Serpentico looks over Cassidy’s shoulder before putting on a headlock. Cassidy powers out without hands, side steps Serpentico then hurdles. Serpentico leaps over, rolls back and Cassidy leaps over. Cassidy gets up to no-hands arm-drag Serpentico! Serpentico gets up to get the shotgun dropkick! No-hands kip up by Cassidy! Taz is admittedly impressed. Cassidy takes off the sleeve but Serpentico avoids the Super Punch!
Cassidy puts his elbow pad back on and wants Serpentico to return, but Serpentico tells Cassidy to join him outside. Cassidy waits and Serpentico has to worry about the count, so Serpentico runs in, only for Cassidy to bail out! Cassidy eggs Serpentico on again, Serpentico slides and catches Cassidy as he slides in! Serpentico spins Cassidy to ROCK him with a forearm! Slingshot double stomps! Then an apron leg drop! Serpentico SUPERKICKS Cassidy, and basement DDT’s! Cover, TWO!! Cassidy gets out of that high stack and Serpentico… Well it’s hard to see his emotions behind that mask.
Cassidy boots Serpentico, Serpentico spins around but gets another boot! Serpentico rushes in again but Cassidy dodges and Serpentico tumbles out. Cassidy DIVES and hits Serpentico into barriers! Cassidy goes up top, Serpentico enziguris him down! Serpentico climbs up, says thumbs DOWN, and SUPERPLEX! Float over and another suplex, but Cassidy spins through to catch the arm, the Mouse Trap! Cassidy wins!
Winner: Orange Cassidy, by pinfall
Serpentico can’t believe he got caught! He attacks but Cassidy dodges, throws off the elbow pad and SUPER PUNCHES Serpentico down! Cassidy raises the ref’s hand in victory, then has the ref put his hands in his pockets. Will Cassidy hit that hard when he gets his chance at revenge on Chris Jericho?
Sammy Guevara VS Fuego Del Sol w/ Low Rida!
Speaking of the Spanish God, he made his shocking return last week to help The Inner Circle beat down Jungle Boy, Luchasaurus and Marko Stunt. But now JB, Luchasaurus, Freshly Squeezed and Best Friends are going to stand up and fight! Will Sammy use the Fire of the Sun to prepare himself for that huge 5v5?
The bell rings and Sammy doesn’t seem to take Fuego that seriously. He gets around Fuego, waistlocks and slams then floats all over to pose. Sammy drags Fuego up to waistlock then headlock, then wrench to a wristlock. Fuego rolls, handsprings and flips to spin and wrench back! Fuego goes after that wrist, he blocks Sammy’s chop, then the other! But Sammy turns the knuckle locks to his advantage! Sammy kicks then flips Fuego, but Fuego rebounds off the ropes to bring Sammy up into a NORTHERN LIGHTS! Bridging cover, TWO, and Sammy has a facelock. Sammy puts Fuego in a corner and CHOPS! Sammy pushes Fuego against the buckles but the ref counts. Sammy lets off at 4 as the fans rally for Fuego.
Fuego throws body shots and whips but Sammy reverses. Sammy runs in, misses the corner, Fuego tiger feints him from the corner! Fuego springboards into a KNEE! Sammy covers casually, TWO! Sammy shows off with crunches and then drags Fuego back up. The crowd rallies but Sammy clubs Fuego down. Sammy swaggers about, brings Fuego up, suplexes and holds him there for a count of 10! Cover, TWO! Sammy fireman’s carries Fuego and shows off with squats, then the Samoan Drop! Cover, but Fuego ghost pins! TWO, Sammy blocks the kick to flip Fuego up and out of the ring! Rida checks on Fuego but Sammy mocks the rallying. Sammy builds speed, fakes Fuego out, spins and poses again.
Sammy rolls out to fetch Fuego but Fuego CHOPS! Sammy CLUBS Fuego for that one then CHOPS him against the apron. Sammy puts Fuego in, takes his time returning, then brings Fuego back up to club him down. Sammy stands on Fuego’s head, the ref reprimands but Sammy lets up. Sammy brings Fuego up again, clamps onto the mask and whips, but Feugo QUEBARADS! Kip up and mule kick! Sammy staggers into a Slingblade Backbreaker to Complete Shot! Fuego goes up top, TORNILLO FLOPS!! Sammy KNEES Fuego, torture racks, G T H!! Cover, Sammy wins!
Winner: Sammy Guevara, by pinfall
Fuego will definitely have to Go To Hospital after that one! Rida gets in, Sammy KICKS him and gives him a GTH, too! Will Sammy help Chris Jericho and friends stand tall over Jurassic Express, Orange Cassidy and Best Friends?
Private Party speaks.
“Your boys’ back in the spot! Don’t make it hot!” But before they go out, where’s Matt Hardy? Here he is! No need to fret, no need to fear, Big Money Matt is here! And do they know why he likes them so much? They have dreams! Big dreams! They want to be the biggest ballers! The shot callers! The prime time players, living a life of luxury! Just like Hardy! He wants them to be the most popular act in AEW! The most successful they are, the more over he stays! Now speaking of wins, tonight will be a big win. Do it by any means necessary. Don’t let Matt down. Make him proud, and wealthier. Wow, Big Money Matt is a bit of a dick compared to the other Matts. But will Quen and Kassidy still do their mentor turned investor proud?
Triple Threat Tag: SoCal Uncensored VS Proud ‘n’ Powerful VS Private Party w/ Big Money Matt!
With the AEW World Tag Team Championships on the line for Dynamite, this match could very well bring about the next contenders! Will it be The Addiction, Christopher Daniels and Frankie Kazarian? The Inner Circle’s pitbulls, Santana & Ortiz? Or the young upstarts with a resume of upsets, Marq Quen & Isiah Kassidy?
The teams sort out, PNP stand down to let Kaz start with Kassidy. Kaz and Kassidy circle, tie up, and go around. Kaz wrenches, fireman’s carry takedown and wristlock. Kassidy endures, gets up and reverses to a hammerlock. Kassidy leans on the hold, Kaz gets up and switches around to drop toehold. Kaz headlocks, Kassidy fights up and fights back. Kassidy powers out, Kaz runs him over and covers, ONE! Kaz scoops but Kassidy slips off to kick low. Kassidy whips, Kaz reverses but things speed up. Ortiz tags in and throws Kassidy out! Kaz hip tosses Ortiz down! Kaz arm-drags Ortiz, fakes him out with a fist to kick! Kaz runs but Ortiz rolls to mule kick. Ortiz tags Santana as he runs to knee smash and neckbreaker! Ortiz is the step stool for Santana’s moonsault!
PNP talk smack to SCU while Hardy helps Kassidy to the corner. Santana snap suplexes and covers, TWO! Santana dropkicks Kaz in the back then brings him up. Santana CHOPS Kaz, whips him to ropes, but Kaz slides under and O’Conner rolls! TWO, Daniels tags in. SCU whips Santana and calf kicks him down! Ortiz runs into an atomic drop! Kaz cravats Ortiz’s head into Daniels’ knee, Daniels STOs Ortiz down! Kaz intercepts Santana, SCU double wrench and kick, clothesline and elbow drop! Daniels covers, ONE! Daniels drags Santana up, gut wrench suplexes, covers, TWO! Daniels keeps on Santana but Santana slips off the fireman’s carry, Quen tags in! Quen and Daniels circle, tie up, Quen headlocks and grinds hard.
Daniels powers out, things speed up, Quen kicks but Daniels blocks and flips him over. Quen lands on his feet to huricanrana Daniels to the Party corner! Quen kicks Daniels, tags Kassidy in, and Pirvate Party double whip. Atomic drop, enziguri and leg sweep! “Say cheese, baby!” Double stomps! Quen and Kassidy dust themselves off, then Kassidy throws forearms on Daniels. Kassidy suplexes, Daniels cradle counters! TWO, Ortiz tags off Kassidy! Santana drags Kassidy out while Ortiz clobbers Daniels! PNP have Daniels for a double suplex! Cover, TWO! Ortiz keeps on Daniels with another cover, TWO! Ortiz stalks Daniels, drags him up and wrenches to a NORTHERN LIGHTS! Bridging cover, TWO!
Ortiz drags Daniels up, tags in Santana, and then whip Daniels into elbows! Ortiz drops the senton, Santana covers, TWO! Santana argues the count but Daniels gets to a corner. Santana clubs Daniels, CHOPS him, then digs his forearms in. The ref counts, Santana lets off but Ortiz gets cheap shots in! Santana digs his heel in now, but he lets up at the count of 4. Tag to Ortiz, Santana clobbers Kaz! PNP double whip but Daniels reverses to send Ortiz into a corner. Ortiz dodges Daniels, Santana hits an uppercut! Santana feeds Daniels to Ortiz’s pop up POWERBOMB! Ortiz sits Daniels up for Santana’s KICK! Cover but Kassidy breaks it up! Santana is upset with the ref as the match continues. Ortiz brings Daniels up as the crowd rallies.
Daniels throws forearms but Ortiz gives them back. They brawl, Ortiz uppercuts but Daniels forearms. Ortiz kicks, whips but Daniels dodges and ducks for double clotheslines to take both men down! The crowd rallies up, Daniels and Ortiz crawl, but Santana trips up Kaz to CLOBBER him! Ortiz back suplexes Daniels, Daniels lands on his feet and hot tags Quen! Quen springboards and crossbodies Ortiz! Santana runs in, Quen dodges to PELE! PNP regroup outside, Quen FLIES onto them both! Quen puts Ortiz in, snapmares him down and tags in Kassidy. Kassidy springboard and moonsaults! Cover, TWO! Kassidy keeps on Ortiz with fast hands! The ref backs Kassidy off but he comes back, only for Ortiz to dodge. SILLY STRING DDT! Cover, but Kaz drags Kassidy off!
Kassidy throws Kaz out then springboards for the STUNNER! Daniels checks on Kaz, Kassidy tags in Quen. Kassidy stalks Ortiz, scoops and slams, then sets him up for Quen. Quen climbs, as does Kassidy on the opposite corner. Private Party LEG DROP SPLASH combo! Shout out to the Hardy Boys! Cover, but Santana drags the REF out! Santana baits Quen into a roll up, then rolls back to CUTTER! Daniels runs at Santana, Santana dodges and rolls back, into BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Ortiz kicks low, suplexes for the STUNNER! Kaz shoulders into Ortiz, slingshot DDT! Kassidy catches Kaz for a tornado COMPLETE SHOT! Kassidy PESCADO onto Daniels! Ortiz throws the mad ball at Quen to frame him! The ref takes that away, LOW BLOW!! Cover, Proud ‘n’ Powerful win!
Winners: Proud ‘n’ Powerful, by pinfall
The Inner Circle builds even more momentum before the 5v5 war for Dynamite! Will they be able to screw over Freshly Squeezed and his team so easily?
This was literally a massive episode of Dark at just over 1 hour and 50 minutes! Granted, a lot of it was still the same with the way matches turned out, but it was all still great stuff. I am a little torn on Cutler and Avalon getting a team name now. The Initiative is clever given Cutler’s love of Dungeons & Dragons, and they had another good match, but of course FTR wins. But my point is, Cutler and Avalon having a team name might steer things away from Cutler VS Avalon at All Out or the first episode with live fans. It’s basically a shame that they’ve come together as allies if it’ll just break up within the next few months. SCU breaks even, Archer and Wardlow decimate their opponents again, and Penelope Ford gets another clean win to build back up. I’m surprised Shida VS Diamante has been upgraded to a title match, but perhaps Shida can build her reign before facing Nyla Rose again.
Jersey’s Finest VS Nakazawa & Suge was a ton of fun, and I hope “Pineapple Pete” sticks with Nakazawa. I really like the idea of them being Turkish oil master and apprentice, that slip ‘n’ slide tackle was great creativity. Abadon is legitimately creepy to me, I just can’t sometimes with her. But she’s being built up, so that’s good for her and the AEW Women’s Division overall. Though, it does make me curious where Anna Jay has been since the decided to #JoinDarkOrder. Dark Order had a lot to do tonight, with the originals winning but the Numbers losing. Unless Omega turns on Hangman, I don’t see Dark Order taking those titles. That would be pretty wild and just in time so that All Out can have new contenders for Dark Order to face and more than certainly defeat.
Best Friends of course benefit from taking on Reynolds and Silver, and Orange Cassidy has a real good match with Serpentico. The Inner Circle also builds momentum as Sammy gets a good win over Fuego and Proud ‘n’ Powerful win big in that Triple Threat main event. I don’t really get why Big Money Matt is the Matt that accompanied Private Party, but maybe they’re testing things out between the other personas. Maybe the point is that it’s about which Matt helps Private Party get the win, and it’ll be the Matt that’s the most like the real Matt. Then the Hardy Party will make their way to a title match, perhaps as the first contenders to a Dark Order reign.
My Score: 8.5/10
Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (8/15/22)
Minneapolis gets Elevated!
It’s a Superbad return!
Penelope Ford returns to action in AEW as Dark: Elevation serves the leftovers from Dynamite’s Quake by the Lake!
- Tony Nese & Josh Woods w/ Mark Sterling VS Travis Titan & Arik Cannon; Nese & Woods win.
- 8 Man Tag: The Dark Order VS T.U.G Cooper, Drew System, Rylie Jackson & Adam Grace; The Dark Order wins.
- Serena Deeb VS Sierra; Deeb wins.
- Konosuke Takeshita VS Cezar Bononi; Konosuke wins.
- Julia Hart VS Free-Range Kara; Julia wins.
- Private Party VS JAH-C & JDX; Private Party wins.
- Penelope Ford VS Heather Reckless; Ford wins.
- The Acclaimed VS Justin Fowler & JT Energy; The Acclaimed win.
- Six Woman Tag: Hikaru Shida & ThunderStorm VS Emi Sakura, Marina Shafir & Nyla Rose w/ Vickie Guerrero; Shida & ThunderStorm win.
Great to see Penelope Ford is back in action. I wonder if Kip Sabian will make his in-ring return soon. Unless he wants to keep stalking Pac a little longer as the box man… Private Party is going to get a win as the warm-up for their AEW World Tag Team Championship match this Wednesday, and pretty much the entirety of The Dark Order is in action in that 8 Man Tag. Konosuke VS Bononi is going to be really good. Bononi is certainly the biggest opponent physically speaking for Konosuke to take on, so we’ll get to see how Konosuke handles that situation.
Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (8/12/22)
Rampage by the Lake!
It’s a packed Friday night for Minneapolis!
From the AAA World Mixed Tag Team Championships to a preview of the AEW World Trios Championship tournament, Rampage is jampacked!
- AAA World Mixed Tag Team Championships: Sammy Guevara & Tay Melo VS Dante Martin & Skye Blue; Sammy & Tay win and retain the titles.
- Parker Boudreaux w/ The Trustbusters VS Sonny Kiss; Boudreaux wins.
- Beardhausen VS Gunn Club; Gunn Club wins.
- Orange Cassidy w/ Best Friends VS Ari Daivari w/ The Trustbusters; Cassidy wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
Bryan Danielson is here!
The American Dragon is back and Minneapolis is fired up to see him! Bryan goes to the ring and Tony Schiavone is there waiting for him to say we can all tell Bryan is here with purpose. So first, there is speculation that after the loss to Daniel Garcia, Bryan is not 100%. Second, Garcia has said he is the “Dragonslayer,” and he will not only defeat Bryan but end his career. Bryan takes the mic to say, “To be honest, I’ve been wrestling almost 23 years, I don’t know if I will ever be 100%. But I don’t need to be 100%, I need to live 100%! And there is nothing that makes me feel more alive than being in this ring!”
Fans cheer that and Bryan continues to say, “I will never willfully stop wrestling. Daniel Garcia said if I get in the ring with him, he’ll slay the dragon, end my career. Do you know what? Someone is gonna have to damn end my career because I am not going to end this ring on my own. But my career will not end this Wednesday!” But then Garcia is on stage and telling Bryan to “hold up, hold up, hold up. Bryan, it’s no secret that Bryan Danielson is my hero! You’re my hero, Bryan! But it sounds like to me that my hero is prepared to lose. It sounds like to me that my hero is coming up with excuses.” Fans boo that as Garcia gets in the ring.
Garcia says that he isn’t sure how many times he can put up with this! Bryan retires, then comes back, then retires again, then comes back again. Bryan can’t keep putting Garcia through this, it hurts Garcia. Garcia says when Bryan hurts Garcia, Garcia wants to hurt Bryan back. And when you step in the ring with Garcia again, Garcia will hurt him so bad, that he ends Bryan’s career for good! And then he won’t just be the Dragonslayer, he’ll be the Greatest Technical Sports Entertainer on the Planet.
Fans boo and Bryan responds with, “I’m okay with people saying they’re gonna end my career. Ever since I came to AEW, I’ve been talking about violence. I love violence, and violence begets violence. But do you know what really pisses me off? It’s that sports entertainment BS!” Fans cheer for that! Bryan knows what Chris Jericho’s been shoving down Garcia’s throat, and it IS that sports entertainment crap! Do you all know that this kid, Daniel Garcia, was one of the first names Bryan mentioned when talking about starting the Blackpool Combat Club? And why? Because Bryan saw Garcia at 21 years old go 60 MINUTES in front of 250 people, showing them the best wrestling Bryan’s seen in a young talent in YEARS!
So let Bryan ask Garcia, and he wants Garcia to think about it all the way to Wednesday, when Bryan’s stomping Garcia’s face in! “Do you wanna be the Best Technical Sports Entertainer on the Planet? Or, or… Look at me when I talk to you!” Bryan even grabs Garcia’s face to keep him looking forward! “If I was your hero, do you want to be the Best Technical Wrestler in the world? And I’ll leave that up to you.” Bryan drops the mic and leaves Garcia to mull that over. What path will Garcia choose while his career is still young?
AAA World Mixed Tag Team Championships: Sammy Guevara & Tay Melo VS Dante Martin & Skye Blue!
Another young protégé of Chris Jericho, and his blushing new bride, are back in action! And for the first time in AEW, they defend the belts that signify their bond! But will the Spanish God and his Brazilian Goddess celebrate a title win on top of their marriage? Or will Angel Dorado & Cielo Azul prove that for once, love doesn’t conquer all?
The introductions are made, the matching red ‘n’ blue belts are raised, and we see if the hometown hero of Minneapolis and the girl next door can win the big one!
The teams sort out, and Skye insists that it’s ladies first. Tay and Sammy kiss for luck, but Dante tells Sammy to leave that stuff backstage. Sammy shoves Dante down! So Skye fires off on Tay! And Dante TACKLES Sammy! The fans fire up as the scraps continue, and the ladies spill out of the ring! Dante TACKLES Sammy again, so it seems the gentlemen are starting instead! Tay RAMS Skye into the railing, Sammy shoves Dante again but Dante trips Sammy up! Dante rains down more forearms while fans fire up for the 612! Sammy gets up and KNEES Dante, then soaks up the heat. Sammy CHOPS Dante against ropes, then whips him to ropes.
Dante reverses, knees and CHOPS Sammy in return, then ROCKS and CHOPS him again. Dante whips Sammy to ropes, Tay catches Sammy to stop him then tags in. Skye is to come in automatically, but she tags to climb up and CROSSBODY! Skye then gets around but Tay throws her off with the judo hip toss. Skye shoves Tay so Tay SLAPS Skye! Skye smirks and SLAPS back! And then fires off fast hands! Fans fire up but Tay trips Skye! Tay steps through, rolls and uses the leg lock to THROW Skye! Tay steps over into a modified STF, and she chinbars Skye into an almost Bow ‘n’ Arrow style stretch! Skye endures, scoots but Tay makes it a cover, ONE!
Skye has a cover, ONE! Skye ROCKS Tay, whips her to ropes, and fans rally. Tay holds ropes but Skye SHINING WIZARDS! And SHINING WIZARDS again! Tay shoves Skye, Skye dodges and mule kicks a leg! Tay blocks the superkick but now the DRAGON WHIP! Fans fire up and Skye runs, but Sammy swipes at her! The ref reprimands, but Tay BOOTS Skye down! Fans boo SamTay while Rampage goes picture in picture.
Tay stomps Skye, covers her, TWO! Tay is frustrated and she talks trash on Dante. Tay stalks Skye to ropes to CHOKE her! The ref counts, Tay lets off at 4, and then she drags Skye up to whip her into a DROP SAYANAGI! And then another! And another, but Skye blocks to a cradle! TWO, and Tay ROCKS Skye! Tay kicks Skye around, drags her up, and she kisses Sammy. That’s not a tag so Tay CLUBS away on Skye. Tay cravats to throw knee after knee into Skye, and then whips her into a neutral corner. Tay runs in and BOOTS Skye! Tay runs in again but Skye dodges the boot to roll Tay up, with a bridge, TWO!!
Rampage returns to single picture and Tay grabs a leg, but Skye ENZIGURIS Tay down! Fans fire up as Skye crawls, hot tag to Dante! That brings Sammy in, but Dante fakes him out into a TACKLE! Dante rains down fists, Sammy shoves him away but Dante rallies with forearm smashes! Dante then ducks a haymaker to DROPKICK Sammy out! Minneapolis fires up and Dante takes aim. Tay runs in but Dante goes up and over her! Dante DIVES and takes out Sammy! Fans fire up as Dante puts Sammy in fast. Dante slides in but Tay anchors a foot! The ref reprimands, Dante drags Tay into the ring with that foot, and Sammy grabs Dante!
Sammy clinches but Dante breaks free. Dante kicks, Sammy blocks and flips Dante, over Tay! Dante then uses Tay as a step to hit a DESTROYER on Sammy!! Sammy flops down, Dante covers, TWO!! Sammy survives and Dante can’t believe it! “This is Awesome!” and Dante drags Sammy up. Sammy KNEES Dante back, torture racks, but Dante slips off! Skye tags in, Dante gets Sammy in a half nelson! Sammy elbows free, Tay tilt-o-whirl DDTs Dante! But Skye FLYING RANAS Sammy! The ladies cleared the ring, Tay SUPERKICKS and hooks Skye, TAY K O!! Cover, SamTay win!
Winners: Sammy Guevara & Tay Melo, by pinfall (still AAA World Mixed Tag Team Champions)
There was a lot of fire in the hearts of Dante & Skye, but not enough to burn down Sammy & Tay. Will Mr. & Mrs. Champion continue to reign on everyone’s parade?
The Lucha Brothers speak.
Rey Fenix says, “After a long road, the Lucha Brothers are coming back for gold.” Penta, with Alex Abrahantes translating, tells Andrade and the world, “This hasn’t finished. But next week, the All-Atlantic Champion returns, and Death Triangle will be reunited and will fight for the Trios Championships.” The Bastard, Pac, is returning from his European tour, will he, Penta & Fenix be ready for The United Empire’s Aussie Open and Will Ospreay in the opening round?
Parker Boudreaux w/ The Trustbusters VS Sonny Kiss!
Ari Daivari recruited this brutal blue chipper to the group, knowing this would be a very wise investment. Will Parker pay off right away? Or will the Concrete Rose prove not to judge a book by its cover?
The bell rings and Parker CLOBBERS Kiss! Kiss flounders, Parker drags him up with a facelock and CLUBS away on the corner! Parker lets off as the ref counts and runs in, but Kiss dodges the splash! Kiss ROCKS Parker, then runs to handspring and SLAP! And uppercut! But Parker grabs Kiss by the neck, for a CHOKE SLAM! Parker snarls and drags Kiss up to a back suplex SLAM!! Cover, Parker wins!
Winner: Parker Boudreaux, by pinfall
Slim J is pumped for Parker but Parker just looks hungry for more. Will the Trustbusters eat well when the Trios Championship begins?
La Faccion Ingobernable meets with the former Andrade Family Office.
Andrade formally introduces Rush to Butcher, Blade and Private Party. Rush doesn’t like Private Party. But Andrade says it’s fine! The LFI will win those Trios Championships, unlike Private Party against Keith Lee. Jose even adds that was embarrassing. Isiah Kassidy tells Jose to shut up, and he tells El Idolo that people like him have been sleeping on Private Party for a very long time. But that’s fine, because it all changes. Private Party will wake Andrade up. Well good, maybe Private Party can get this group those world tag titles. Upper management leaves, will Kassidy & Quen redeem themselves in the eyes of the ungovernables?
Beardhausen VS Gunn Club!
Erick Redbeard returns to AEW alongside the Very Nice, Very Evil Danhausen to teach these Ass Boys something! Not quite sure what, but will Danhausen & Erick put a curse on the Gunn Club? Or can Austin & Colten redeem themselves after losing in the Dumpster Match?
The teams sort out and Erick starts against Colten. Fans taunt the “ASS~ BOYS! ASS~ BOYS!” Colten shrugs that off to tie up with Erick, and Erick shoves Colten down! Fans fire up but Austin tags in. Austin steps to Erick now, but then decides not. Psych! Austin rushes in, but Erick runs him over! The boys bail out and regroup and Billy asks what the hecc! Billy tells Austin to get in there, but then Danhausen tags in! Fans fire up as Danhausen flexes on Austin. He powers up and… CURSES Austin! But Austin DECKS Danhausen! So no hex? Austin bumps Danhausen off buckles as Rampage goes picture in picture.
Austin tags Colten, Colten bumps Danhausen off more buckles then stomps away. Colten whips corner to corner, runs in, but Danhausen boots him away! Danhausen goes up, reels Colten in, and puts him in the ROPE BUTTERFLY! Austin protests but that only means Colten suffers longer! The ref counts, Danhausen lets go at 4, and then he slingshots up to the top! But while the ref is checking on Colten, Austin sucker punches Danhausen! Colten then DROPKICKS Danhausen down! Colten soaks up the heat, drags Danhausen up and brings him around to bump off buckles. Colten stomps Danhausen, the ref counts, and he lets off at 4.
Colten taunts Erick but then backs off as Erick steps in. Colten bumps Danhausen off buckles, tags Austin in, but Danhausen fights back! He fires off haymakers on Austin, but Austin kicks low! Austin ROCKS Danhausen, taunts the fans, and Billy taunts Danhausen with an Orange Cassidy thumbs up. Austin drags Danhausen up to stomp away in the corner, then lets off as the ref counts. The ref reprimands Austin but misses Colten CHOKING Danhausen! Colten CLUBS Danhausen then tells fans they saw nothing! Austin stomps Danhausen, drags him up, and brings him around as Rampage goes to break.
Rampage returns and Austin has Danhausen in a headlock. Fans rally up and Danhausen slips away! Austin rushes after him but Danhausen slips under! And then under again, hot tag to Erick! Redbeard rallies on the Gunn Clubs, BOOT for Austin, DROPKICK for Colten! Then a SPLASH and TOSS for Colten, then he runs at Austin, Austin BOOTS Erick, but Erick TOSSES Austin out onto Colten! Erick goes out now and runs in to CROSSBODY both Ass Boys! Fans fire up as Erick puts Austin in and fans rally up for the slingshot senton! Shoutout to Brodie Lee! Then a HEEL KICK! Cover, Colten breaks it!
Fans boo as Colten hammers away on Erick! Colten rags Erick up, Austin joins in, but Erick fights the double suplex to DOUBLE SUPLEX Gunn Club! Fans are thunderous, and Danhausen wants back in! Tag and Danhausen is in! Erick drags Austin up for him, Danhausen hooks Austin up, and Erick runs! But Colten distracts the ref and Billy dumps Erick out! Fans boo and Austin turns things around into a FAMOUSER! Cover, Gunn Club wins!!
Winners: Gunn Club, by pinfall
Big assist from Daddy Ass, and yet Billy gets the mic to say, “Oh my God, are you kidding me? Really, that’s what you’re giving us? No wonder they call you Ass Boys, and no wonder I miss The Acclaimed.” Ouch… Billy means that the guys need to toughen up a bit. A lot of bit! They sure ain’t doing what he’s taught them, that’s a fact! But that’s okay, on Dynamite, they’ve got another match to prove themselves with. But who is it? Billy doesn’t say, will Austin & Colten just have to tough it out? Wait, Stokely Hathaway is in the crowd, offering his business card again. Austin & Colten don’t accept, and they follow after Billy.
Backstage interview with Keith Lee & Swerve Strickland.
Lexi Nair is with the AEW World Tag Team Champions, Swerve in Our Glory. Earlier, Andrade made it clear that he wants Private Party to go after the titles. Now, Keith Lee has history with them, but what makes the tag title match different? Keith chuckles and says, “Listen. I got here, Mr. Kassidy was a challenger, and I dismantled him. His friend, Quen, jumps in, I dismantle him. I don’t know if this makes sense, but if you didn’t have a chance against me, what makes you think you have a chance against us? Please, do the math.”
Swerve admits math wasn’t his best subject, when it came to counting money! But um, he added up Private Party’s losses, subtracted their wins, and carried the one, and the still don’t add up to a top five ranking team! So they will allow Private Party to be grace the champs with their presence, since no ranked team wants to, and they can #SwerveInOurGlory. Whose house? “SWERVE’S HOUSE!” Will Quen & Kassidy take advantage of this gracious opportunity? Or will they be of further disappointment to El Idolo.
HOOK is here!
Minneapolis fires up for the Cold-Hearted, Handsome Devil of a NEW FTW Champion! Hook goes to the ring, Schiavone is there, and Schiavone says there is no question that one of the most incredible debuts in AEW culminated with Hook becoming FTW Champion. As we understand it, this title is always in open challenge. Is that right, Hook? “Yup.” Okay. We’ve followed Hook’s career, short as it is still, and it has been tremendous. But wait! Out walks Zack Clayton! He introduces himself as “The Reality,” and he knows some recognize him from his reality TV superstardom in the great state of New Jersey!
Clayton tells Hook that he will take that FTW Championship from him, “you little wannabe tough guy New Yorker!” And Clayton will bring it to God’s Country, New Jersey, where it belongs! Hook nods and wave Clayton to bring it, but Clayton says no, he just got new boots made, they’re not ready it. And plus, being a Jersey guy, he does things on his terms. So how about we do this on next week’s Rampage? Hook holds up the belt to say sure thing! The match is made, will The Reality be the one getting a reality check against the Son of Taz?
Mark Henry speaks with tonight’s main eventers!
The World’s Strongest Man says Ari Daivari offered Orange Cassidy a spot in the Trustbusters, but what is it that Daivari sees in him? “Mark, Orange Cassidy is easily, hands down, one of the most talented professional wresters on the AEW roster. And now that my trust has officially kicked in, I am investing my hard earned money into the best talent around.” Look what he’s already down for Slim J and Parker Boudreaux! And Orange doesn’t wanna join that? He still wants to hang out with “those stupid goofs?” Hey, you don’t wanna join in, fine! They’ll do the next best thing, and Daivari will beat Orange’s ass in this old dump of a hometown, Minneapolis!
Wow. Well, uh, looks like there’s been enough talk. Orange, no, that’s Mark’s line. Oh. Well, it is true, though. It’s time for the main event! Will Cassidy give Quake by the Lake a Freshly Squeezed main event? Or will Daivari Dinero make that money?
Orange Cassidy w/ Best Friends VS Ari Daivari w/ The Trustbusters!
The bell rings and fans rally for “Freshly Squeezed!” as he gives Best Friends his jacket and tie-dye shirt. Cassidy lifts up his hands but Daivari has him wait before putting them in his pockets. Daivari gets a mic and says, “I’m gonna give you one last chance to join the Trustbusters. All you have to do is lay down and let me pin you, then the four of us can get out of this sh*tty town.” Fans boo and Cassidy… nods?! Cassidy lies down and Daivari says he knew Cassidy was smarter than that. Cassidy is ready, Daivari takes a moment to decide what angle he’s coming in from, but then Cassidy rolls away!
Fans laugh and Cassidy tells Daivari to hurry up. Daivari goes to cover again but Cassidy rolls away again! Daivari is annoyed, he storms up but Cassidy rolls out of the ring. And then puts his hands up, to… Nope, Cassidy has to get in the ring as Daivari rushes out! Cassidy then rolls all the way to the far side and gets a GROUP HUG from Best Friends! Got to give the people what they want! But then Boudreaux and Slim J flank them! Chuck & Trent step to them, Daivari rushes out after Cassidy! Daivari puts Cassidy in but things speed up! Cassidy ducks, waistlocks, Daivari switches but Cassidy switches back.
Daivari switches again and he SLAMS Cassidy down! Cassidy fights up, pries at the hold, goes for a leg, but then just puts his hands up. And he slips his hands inside the waistlock to put them in his pockets! Cassidy uses that to break free! And kangaroo kicks! Things speed up, Cassidy hurdles and SHOTGUNS Daivari down! Fans fire up as Cassidy kips up, and then he blocks Daivari’s kick! It was headed a little low and Daivari apologizes, but Cassidy shoves Daivari to a corner. Daivari goes up and out, Cassidy rushes in but into a shoulder! And then a DRAPING NECKBREAKER! Daivari grins and hugs it out with his team, NOT what the people want.
Daivari takes his time returning and Rampage goes picture in picture. Daivari drags Cassidy up, whips him to a corner hard, and Cassidy bounces off buckles. Daivari soaks up the heat from the fans and he stands Cassidy up. Daivari CHOPS Cassidy in the corner, follows him along the way to another corner, and then drags him up to whip corner to corner hard! Cassidy bounces off buckles again, and Daivari drags him back up. Daivari puts Cassidy in the ropes, CHOKES him, but lets off at 4. Slim J chokes Cassidy behind the ref’s back! Best Friends protest but the ref misses it all. Trent storms over but Slim J has Parker backing him up.
Daivari stomps Cassidy, then drags him up to turn him for a Neckbreaker Rack! Cassidy endures the stretch, pries at the hold, and fans rally up as Cassidy turns things back around! Daivari fights the backslide, but Cassidy fights it back. They struggle for control, Daivari swings Cassidy out for a SPINEBUSTER! Cover, TWO! Daivari is annoyed, he slaps Cassidy around, and then drags him up to TOSS out of the ring! The ref watches Slim J and Parker, and Best Friends storm over to back them off. Daivari goes out to fetch Cassidy, and RAMS him into the apron! Daivari RAMS Cassidy into railing and soaks up the heat from the front row.
Daivari puts Cassidy in the ring, talks trash on Trent, then clamps onto Cassidy with a chinlock. Cassidy endures, pries at the hold, and fans rally as he works on the grip! Rampage returns to single picture as Cassidy has the hold open. Cassidy turns things around but Daivari turns them right back and shoves Cassidy to ropes! Daivari catches Cassidy to a SLEEPER, but Cassidy flails and reaches out! Cassidy is fading, and is turning red, but he gets the ROPEBREAK! Daivari SLAPS the arms off the ropes and puts the SLEEPER on again! Fans rally as Cassidy endures again, but the ref checks. The arm drops once! And then it drops twice!
But Cassidy gets his second wind, puts both hands up, and then puts them in his pockets! Cassidy RAMS Daivari into buckles, gets free and dodges a lariat, but DOUBLE LARIATS collide on the return! Fans rally up again as both men stir. A standing count starts and climbs, the Trustbusters and Best Friends coach their guys up. Cassidy gets to a corner and drags himself up while Daivari stands. Daivari runs in but only gets buckles! Cassidy runs in but gets put on the apron! Cassidy blocks a punch to bump Daivari and then climbs. Daivari CHOPS Cassidy, then CHPOS again! Daivari hurries to set Cassidy up, but Cassidy boots Daivari away!
Cassidy adjusts now, but Daivari CHOPS him again! Daivari climbs up after Cassidy but Cassidy resists. Daivari CLUBS away on Cassidy, but Cassidy SHOVES Daivari down! Cassidy leaps, CROSSBODY! Cassidy keeps moving, ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl, but no DDT! Daivari whips, Cassidy goes up but Daivari KICKS him out of the air! But Cassidy dodges again, only for Daivari to dodge and RUNNING NECKBREAKER! Cassidy staggers up, Daivari reels him in, but Cassidy suplexes first! Fans fire up as Cassidy gets to a corner. The standing count returns but fans rally for “Freshly Squeezed!”
Cassidy is up first, he gives those “devastating” kicks to Daivari, but dodges a superkick to SUPERKICK back! Cassidy prepares the arm, runs in, but Daivari turns Orange Punch into URENAGE! Cover, TWO!! Daivari is furious but he drags Cassidy up. Daivari says Cassidy should’ve accepted the offer. Daivari hammerlocks the arm, but Cassidy arm-drags him away! Cassidy tilt-o-whirls and DDTs! Fans fire up and Cassidy goes up top, DEEP IMPACT!! Cover TWO!! Daivari survives two DDTs in a row but the armband comes off! Cassidy is fired up, Slim J gets on the apron! Chuck trips him up! Parker grabs Chuck and Trent!
Cassidy DIVES to take Parker out! Cassidy hurries back up but Daivari trips him up! Daivari crosses the arms, ICONOCLASM!! Cover, TWO!! Daivari is furious but he slashes his throat! He vows to end this with the hammerlock and LION- NO, Cassidy ducks then rolls Daivari up. ONE as Daivari rolls through, Cassidy ducks the superkick to ORANGE PUNCH!! Cover, Cassidy wins!
Winner: Orange Cassidy, by pinfall
Cassidy refused to sell out Slim J CLOBBERS Cassidy! But Best Friends TOSS Slim J out Only to turn around and get CLOBBERED by Parker! Parker SPLASHES Chuck in one corner, then SPLASHES Trent in the other, and roars! Fans boo but Orange is back up! And Sonny Kiss rushes out there! Kiss did just lose to Parker, so- Kiss LOW BLOWS Cassidy!?!? And then Parker gives Orange the SLAM!! Did Kiss just sell out to the Trustbusters!? Did that happen between now and that match earlier? Or was it all part of the plan?
A great episode to close out the first Quake by the Lake event, with some surprising developments here. While Parker Boudreaux didn’t really change his moveset up from when he was Harland in NXT, he of course wins here tonight in a squash. Then we got an awesome main event out of Cassidy VS Daivari, even with Best Friends and the Trustbusters ringside. I was a touch surprised Cassidy won, but then that brawl at the end with Kiss swerving and turning Heel was a great way for Trustbusters to stand tall here. The go-home math is now a wash, but I would think Best Friends win to advance in the trios tournament.
Speaking of that tournament, great promo from the LFI and extended faction, as well as from Keith & Swerve. A title match between Keith & Swerve VS Private Party is going to be awesome, but I would think the champions retain the titles. Private Party going after LFI would be great to turn Private Party Face. Good promo from Lucha Bros to hype up their Trios Championship tournament match, and I would think Death Triangle beats The United Empire, pinning one of Aussie Open. And their promo implies that no matter who the third man is for the Young Bucks, LFI advances. AKA it’ll be Brandon Cutler because the Bucks have no one else, and he takes the pin.
Really fun match from Gunn Club and Beardhausen, but rather surprising that Gunn Club won. Billy is really ripping into his own sons, I have a feeling he just pushes them into joining Stokely’s stable. Stokely’s got Ethan Page, he’s got Lee Moriarty, he needs a tag team before can start taking over AEW properly, and it could be Gunn Club. Great promo segment from Hook and Zack Clayton, and this is a great opportunity for Clayton to move up in the world. The Mixed Tag Championship match was a great opening match, and while Dante & Skye looked great, I figured SamTay would win to retain.
And we got a great promo from Bryan and Garcia to open the whole show, and I am so happy Bryan is taking this story the way I was hoping. Daniel Garcia is definitely more a BCC guy than a JAS guy, so I hope the best two outta three falls match starts getting Garcia to consider his position in the feud. There’s a lot that Garcia can bring into the BCC, from both a moment of dysfunction since he battled Yuta for the ROH Pure Championship and was insufferable to the other BCC members, to more fire in the faction because they can get even more titles now. I can’t wait to see where this goes next.
My Score: 8.7/10
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