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Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu Results & Report! (7/11/20)

Who heads for Eventide?

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Legend of Zelda Hyrule Pro-Wrestling

The Legend of Zelda: The Ring of Destiny, Chapter 5

Hyrule Puro-Resu arrives in Lanayru Bay! The Eventide challengers do battle to determine who sets sail for HPW Treasure Island in August!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Eventide Qualifier #1: Garo Master VS Yuga VS Ashei; Ashei wins, she and Garo advance.
  • Eventide Qualifier #2: King Moblin VS Master Kohga VS Groose; Kohga wins, he and Groose advance.
  • Eventide Qualifier #3: Zelda VS Fin Balure VS Rosso; Zelda wins, she and Fin advance.

PLAY BY PLAY

HPW and HXS set the scene!

Summer is here and that means things are only heating up in Hyrule! Every champion in HPW, from Link the Triforce Champion to the Trios Champions, the Dark Forces, prepare for epic showdown after epic showdown at the brand new event known, “Treasure Island!” But the champions and contenders won’t be the only ones sailing to Eventide. Tonight, NINE challengers will compete in three separate Triple Threat matches to determine the Eventide Challenge’s field of six. That means the wrestlers who LOSE their matches are ELIMINATED! Who will move on to take on the biggest challenge in their careers? HPW Lanayru Bay starts now!

 

Eventide Qualifier #1: Garo Master VS Yuga VS Ashei!

Two participants in the Triforce Tournament and a rising name in Women’s Wrestling have been put together in this opening contest! The first chapter of the Eventide Challenge begins!

Fans chant for “Women’s Wrestling!” as Ashei stares down Garo and Yuga. Garo steps forward but Yuga holds up a hand right to Garo’s face. Yuga walks over to Ashei and looks her up and down. The Artist doesn’t seem to approve of Ashei’s big white knee and elbow pads, and really dislikes her bangs. He makes the mistake of flicking them, and Ashei grabs his arm! She wrenches to a wristlock and shifts to a keylock. Garo sweeps Ashei’s legs, she falls and brings Yuga down with her. Garo springboards to LYNEL-SAULT onto them both! Cover, TWO! Yuga sits up but Ashei grabs him for a ghost pin! TWO, and Yuga flounders to a corner. Garo runs in but Yuga slips out to the apron. Garo hits buckles and Yuga enziguris him back. Yuga steps-in springboards and hits Garo with a swinging Complete Shot! Cover, but Ashei drags him off.

Ashei hooks legs with Yuga but he flails his arms to avoid the surfboard. Garo springboards again to drop a leg on Yuga’s head! Garo grabs Yuga’s arms and chicken wings them for CATTLE MUTILATION! Ashei stomps Yuga’s knees, then jumps to STOMP Garo! Garo rolls away and Yuga clutches his knees. Ashei goes after Garo but he rolls out of the ring. Ashei turns back to Yuga and he ROCKS her with a right hand! Yuga rolls her up, and tries to pull of her knee pad? He hates them that much? Ashei kicks Yuga away and Garo returns to huricanrana Yuga out of the ring! Ashei swings on Garo but Garo ducks, runs and slides under to waistlock. Garo back suplexes but Ashei lands on her feet. Ashei mule kicks then front kicks then runs, but Yuga trips her up. Yuga spins her around, drags her out and RAMS her into barriers! Only to turn around into Garo’s PESCADO!

The fans fire up as Garo drags Yuga up and into the ring. Cover, TWO, and Garo looks to the outside as Ashei gets back up. Garo slingshots but Ashei gets clear! Garo lands on his feet, and Ashei KNEES him down! Yuga runs and baseball slides, but Ashei avoids that to spin him around on the apron. Ashei KNEES Yuga and the fans fire up. Ashei goes in, drags Yuga to a cover, TWO! Ashei keeps her cool as she brings Yuga up. She goes to suplex but Yuga blocks. Ashei throws body shots and tries again, but Yuga flails to resist again. Yuga suplexes but Ashei flails now. Ashei suplexes Yuga and gets him up! And holds him there! Ashei holds Yuga for a count of 10 before slamming him down! She floats to a cover, TWO! Garo runs in and huricanranas Ashei to a cover, TWO!

Garo swings a kick, Ashei ducks under it, but gets hits by the enziguri! Garo La Magistrols Ashei, TWO! Yuga rolls Ashei up, but Garo rolls Yuga up, only for Ashei to roll Garo up! TWO, and the three stand off. The fans cheer this great exchange as the three reset. The three carefully approach each other, and then Yuga just shoves Ashei aside and ROCKS Garo! Yuga double chicken wings Garo and lifts him for a TIGER SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO! Ashei KNEES Yuga out of the ring! Garo swings a kick, Ashei ducks it, and is ready for the enziguri this time! She catches it to an ANKLE LOCK! Garo flails about then rolls to throw Ashei away! Yuga returns and chop blocks Garo, but Ashei runs at Yuga. He avoids the knee this time, and he arm-drags Ashei on the return, to an armbar! Ashei clasps her hands, shifts around, and dead lifts Yuga! To POWERBOMB at Garo! Cover on Yuga, TWO! Cover on Garo, TWO!

The fans are fired up as Ashei keeps her eyes on both Garo and Yuga. Garo gets up first, so Ashei whips him to ropes. Garo reverses, Ashei ducks, dodges and LEAPING LARIATS! Yuga rushes over but Ashei kicks his clothesline away. She cravats Yuga and smashes him off her knee! She spins him around, STIFF neckbreaker! Cover, but Garo breaks it! Garo whips Ashei again but she holds ropes. Garo runs in but she back drops him up and out. He lands on the apron safely, but she dropkicks his legs out! Garo bumps off the apron and she goes back to Yuga. He flounders up into a kick, she suplexes him up, to bring him down for a KNEE! Cover, TWO!! Yuga survives and Ashei is shocked! She hurries to bring Yuga up and to a corner. She hoists him up to the top rope then climbs up to join him. Yuga throws body shots but Ashei clubs him on the back. Ashei gets an edge and brings Yuga up.

But Garo returns and climbs up behind Ashei! He waistlocks but she holds onto the ropes for dear life. She elbows Garo down but Yuga throws forearms. Ashei forearms back and the two brawl. Ashei gets the edge again, brings Yuga up, but Garo springs back up! SUPER GERMAN SUPERPLEX!! All three are down and the fans are losing their minds! The referee checks on all three wrestlers, and they’re all somehow okay to continue. A standing count begins and the crowd rallies up. All three stir as the count reaches 4. Garo rises first at 6, followed by Ashei at 7. Garo CHOPS Ashei, but she comes back with a big forearm. Garo CHOPS again, but Ashei forearms again. They keep brawling back and forth, picking up speed as the fans fire up!

Yuga rushes up behind Ashei, knocks her into Garo, then O’Conner rolls Ashei back! TWO as Ashei O’Conner rolls Yuga! TWO and Ashei is sent into Garo’s sunset flip! TWO and Ashei sits on the cover! TWO and Garo has the sunset flip back, to get Yuga’s basement BOOT! Yuga turns around into Ashei’s fireman’s carry! SNOWPEAK GUT BUSTER DROP! Cover, Ashei wins!!

Winner: Ashei, by pinfall (Yuga is ELIMINATED, Ashei and Garo advance)

The Artist is OUT! Garo Master and the soft spoken but hard hitting maiden are headed for Eventide! If this is just the beginning, what more can we expect from the other contenders next?

 

Eventide Qualifier #2: King Moblin VS Master Kohga VS Groose!

King Moblin fell in the Bracket of Power. The Yiga Clan leader failed to even enter the Bracket of Wisdom. And we know that the Skyfall Stud held the Death Mountain Championship for a fleeting moment. Who will taste bitter defeat yet again in this newest of second chances?

The bell rings and Kohga bails out already, motioning for Moblin and Groose to fight first. Groose shouts at Kohga but Moblin clobbers Groose from behind! Moblin brings Groose up and puts him in a corner, but then he sees Kohga coming. Kohga stops in his tracks and backs off apologetically but then he points at Groose. Moblin turns around but Kohga rolls him up! TWO and Moblin is furious with Kohga. Kohga bails out again and Groose waistlocks Moblin. Groose lifts but Moblin elbows out. Moblin whips Groose to a corner, Groose elbows back, Kohga springboards to flying knee Moblin! Moblin drops to a knee, Groose runs up and clotheslines him from behind! Groose covers but he sees Kohga coming and gets out of the way, Kohga drops a back senton onto Moblin!

Groose facelocks Kohga and drags him up. Groose suplexes Kohga and uses a gourd buster to slam him onto Moblin! Kohga clutches his stomach but Groose drags him back up and reels him in. Groose POWERBOMBS Kohga onto Moblin now! Groose covers Moblin, ONE!? Moblin is tougher than Groose thought! Groose heads to a corner and climbs up as the fans fire up. Groose aims at Moblin and leaps for a MACHO ELBOW! Direct hit and cover, TWO! Groose is surprised but he tries again. He climbs up top, but Kohga SHORYUKENS him first! Kohga drags Groose out to a fireman’s carry, to turn around and Death Valley Drive Groose into the buckles! Kohga puts Groose in the Tree of Woe, but Moblin comes up and grabs him in a waistlock! Kohga flails but Moblin GERMAN SUPLEXES Kohga into Groose! Groose flops out of the Tree of Woe while Moblin roars.

The fans duel, “MOB~LIN!” “Let’s Go, Groose!” “MOB~LIN!” “Let’s Go, Groose!” If there are Kohga chants, they’re being drowned out. Moblin drags Groose around by his leg. Moblin grabs a knee and SMASHES it into the mat! Groose clutches the knee but Moblin grabs it again to YANK on the leg. Moblin drags Groose to a corner and SWINGS the leg into the post! The fans boo as Moblin SLAMS the leg on the apron. Moblin soaks up the heat then grabs the leg again, but Groose pulls him into the post! Then Kohga triangle PLANCHAS! Down goes Moblin! Kohga hurries back up to the apron and slingshot sentons onto Groose! La Magistrol, TWO! Groose hobbles but Kohga KICKS the bad leg out! Kohga grabs the leg for a grounded DRAGON SCREW!

Fans rally for Groose as he crawls along the ropes. Kohga stomps the bad leg, then wraps it on the ropes! Kohga pulls and the ref can’t do anything about it, no disqualifications in a Triple Threat. Groose kicks at Kohga with his good leg and gets him to let go. Moblin returns to BOOT Kohga down! Kohga flops out of the ring so Moblin stomps Groose into the corner. Moblin stomps a mudhole, fires up then runs corner to corner. Moblin hits Groose with a corner hip attack! Cover, but Kohga drags Moblin out of the ring! And throat chops him! Kohga RAMS Moblin into railing, then RAMS him into the apron. Kohga hops back up onto the apron, leaps and huricanranas Moblin into the railing! Fans are fired up with Kohga as he goes back into the ring. Groose grabs Kohga for a DDT outta nowhere! Cover, TWO!! Groose is immediately frustrated that getting the drop on Kohga was enough.

Groose refocuses and brings Kohga back up. Kohga breaks free, throws slapping palm strikes, and mule kicks the bad leg out! Kohga runs but Groose runs him over! Groose shakes out the bad leg before he runs, but Kohga stays low, then hurdles then dropkicks, only for Groose to catch the legs! Kohga hits the mat, Groose takes aim, and catapults Kohga into a corner! Kohga hits buckles, staggers and Groose double chicken wings. Groose turns Kohga but Kohga pushes him away. Groose turns around into an eye poke! The ref reprimands but Kohga “apologizes” before he POSTS Groose! Roll up, with tights! TWO, and Groose flounders blindly. Kohga sees Moblin getting back on the apron so he builds speed. Moblin jumps over the baseball slide and Kohga slides all the way out. Moblin CANNONBALLS off the apron and wipes out Kohga!

Moblin hurries into the ring to go after Groose. He grabs Groose’s shoulder, RIGHT HAND OF THE GODDESS!! Groose decks Moblin outta nowhere! Cover, TWO!! Groose can’t believe his power punch has failed him again! The fans are still rallying for Groose as he brings Moblin up with the double chicken wings. Groose and Moblin fight for control, Groose turns him, but Moblin turns it back! Moblin STEALS LOFT WING DROP!! Kohga 450 splashes outta nowhere onto Moblin!! Cover, Kohga wins!!

Winner: Master Kohga, by pinfall (King Moblin is ELIMINATED, Kohga and Groose advance)

The Yiga leader strikes at the most opportune time to take out the biggest wrestler in the running! Will he use a similar strategy to grab the prize on Eventide? As for Groose, he survives thanks to Kohga’s cunning, will he “thank” Master Kohga properly on Treasure Island?

 

Eventide Qualifier #3: Zelda VS Fin Balure VS Rosso!

Controversy has followed the Princess of Hyrule wherever she goes these days. First being found out as the masked wrestler Sheik during the Triforce Championship Tournament Finals, followed by being given an opportunity at the Goddess Championship, and now this chance at Treasure Island. Favoritism or fate, it doesn’t matter as she must still survive this match to earn her ticket to Eventide! Will the Zora Rock ‘n’ Rolla and Stone Breaker be the ones to stop her good fortune?

Before the bell, Fin walks up to Zelda. “You’re the princess, huh? Well then call me The Prince. Only one of us is taken the throne, and it ain’t you.” Rosso walks over and pushes Fin away, telling him to show respect. Fin cools off, turns around to take his jacket off, and PELES Ross down! The ref rings the bell and Fin throws his jacket at Zelda! She fumbles with it while Fin covers Rosso, TWO! Zelda throws Fin’s jacket back at him before going after him with kicks and clubbing forearms! She backs him down to a corner but he slips out to the apron. Fin enziguris Zelda away then hurries after her. Fin grabs an arm and grinds on the shoulder, but Zelda rolls, rolls back, and handsprings forward to arm-drag him away! Fin flounders up, she arm-drags him again! He fakes her out on the third, grabs the arm again, but she kicks him away and gets distance.

Rosso gets up, shaking out the cobwebs. Fin keeps his distance as things reset. Die hard fans cheer on ol’ Rosso as he gets to his feet. Rosso glares at Fin and storms his way over. Fin backs himself into a corner but avoids Rosso’s grip to CHOP! Rosso just shrugs it off! Fin CHOPS again, and again, but Rosso just eggs him on! Zelda also eggs Fin on but Fin shouts at her to shut up. Rosso uses this distraction to headbutt Fin! Fin staggers into Zelda’s shotgun dropkick and that sends him out of the ring. Zelda stares Rosso down as she gets back to her feet, and now these two circle. Fans duel as they tie up, and Zelda tries to wrench his arm, but Rosso doesn’t budge. He whips Zelda to ropes but Zelda holds ropes to fake out his back drop. She kicks him then runs, tilt-o-whirls but Rosso blocks the DDT with pure strength! Rosso brings Zelda up to flapjack toss her away!

Fin returns to stomp Rosso’s leg! Rosso hobbles and Fin keeps stomping. Fin stomps Rosso into a corner, Rosso grabs at him, but Fin swats the hands away to CHOP him again. Rosso still doesn’t flinch from that, and turns things around in the corner. Fin avoids Rosso’s clubbing hand to CHOP again. Still nothing! Zelda gets up and hurries over, but Fin hits her first with a haymaker. Rosso clamps onto Fin’s shoulders but Fin PELES again! Fin climbs up to rain down clubbing forearms but Rosso carries him out on his shoulder! Rosso pops Fin into a fireman’s carry, TKO NECKBREAKER! But Zelda returns to DROP-SAULT! Cover on Fin, TWO! Zelda hurries to La Magistrol, TWO! Rosso gets up as Zelda sunset flips Fin. Fin rolls through and basement dropkicks Zelda back! Only for Rosso to POUNCE him away! Fans lose their minds as Fin flops out of the ring.

Rosso brings Zelda up by her arm and actually stands her up respectfully. The two nod at each other respectfully, but Zelda tries to arm-drag Rosso! Rosso doesn’t even budge, and he just looks down at her with some disappointment. He YANKS her back up, has her in bomb position, but she fights out fast! Zelda KICKS Rosso in the leg, then again, but he stays up. He hobbles a little as they circle, rushes in but Zelda gets around to jump up for a sleeper hold! Rosso claws at the hold but Zelda squeezes tight. Zelda manages to trap one arm with a leg, but Rosso uses that to get her up to an Electric Chair! Zelda flails and goes back, but the Poison-Rana is blocked! Rosso swings Zelda forward, but she counters the Inverted Hebra Slam into a VICTORY ROLL! Cover, TWO! Zelda gets up, and Fin BLASTS her with a shotgun dropkick!

Fin stomps a mudhole into Zelda in a corner and doesn’t have to stop because of no disqualifications! The fans boo but Fin tunes them out as he fires up. Fin runs corner to corner, and leaps for the hesitation dropkick! Cover, but Rosso drags him off and reels him in for a dead lift wheelbarrow suplex! Rosso stalks Fin as he flounders to a corner, then brings him up for a DOUBLE CHOP! Fin gasps for air but Rosso stands him back up to then put on the top rope. Rosso single hand CHOPS again, and Fin almost falls to the floor below! Rosso sits Fin back up and brings him out on his shoulders, primed for a Muscle Buster! Rosso walks around with Fin but turns into Zelda’s SUPERKICK! Rosso falls back and Fin still hits the mat in a falling Muscle Buster! Zelda covers Rosso, TWO! She covers Fin, TWO!! Zelda grows frustrated but calms down as she watches the other two stir.

Rosso sits up while Fin bails out. Zelda KICKS Rosso in the back, but Rosso just seethes as he stands up. Zelda kicks, Rosso blocks, and gets up and under to bring her up! Rosso aims for a corner, but Zelda huricanranas to send him into buckles! Zelda runs corner to corner then runs back, to dropkick Rosso into buckles! Zelda keeps moving, goes corner to corner again, for another dropkick! Rosso sits down, Zelda keeps moving, METEORA! She drags Rosso to the cover, TWO! Zelda grows frustrated again but she steps on Rosso to go to the corner. She hops up to the second rope, for a somersault senton! Cover, TWO! Zelda drags Rosso around by a leg, hooks it up, and drops for a snap deathlock! She cranks back but Rosso endures, so she gets up and drops for another! Rosso still endures, even as she kicks at the knee with her other leg.

Rosso crawls for ropes, but Fin slingshots in to STOMP him down! And stomps, and stomps, and even springboard stomps! Zelda protests as she struggles to unhook legs. Fin keeps dropping springboard stomps, but then Zelda catches him midair and dumps him out to the apron! Zelda grabs Rosso’s arm for La Magistrol, TWO! Rosso sits up, Zelda BUZZSAWS him down! Cover, but Fin drags her off! She kicks at him through the bottom rope but he goes up and slingshots in again! Zelda avoids the stomp, but she swings into a back suplex, that he turns into a toss into the corner! She bounces off buckles, Fin trips her up, DOUBLE STOMPS! Fin hurries to the corner, but Rosso clobbers him at the apron!

Rosso climbs up and brings Fin to the corner. He brings Fin up, but Fin grabs the ropes for dear life! Rosso keeps trying for his superplex but Fin even wraps a leg around the corner to hold it off. Rosso clubs Fin on the back over and over then tries again. Rosso gets Fin up for a stalling SUPERPLEX! But Zelda covers Fin! Rosso breaks it up in time, and glares down at Zelda. He pump handles Zelda and dead lifts her for a HUGE Fall Away Slam! Zelda crashes down halfway across the ring! Rosso storms over as Zelda flounders to the ropes, brings her up, and DOUBLE CHOPS! Zelda sits down and falls back, but her legs keep her from hitting the floor as they hook the middle rope!

Rosso reaches through the ropes to bring her back up, but she grabs him for a hanging guillotine! The ref reprimands, not because there’s disqualifications but because there’s still a ropebreak, no submissions count outside the ring. Rosso starts to fade, Zelda lets go and pushes him back in the ring. She covers, TWO! Rosso still lives but Zelda keeps her focus. She watches Rosso slowly stand up, but Fin grabs her for a dragon sleeper! Zelda flails and spins out, ROCKS him with a forearm, and feeds him to Rosso! Rosso pops Fin up for a POWERSLAM! Zelda jumps up to POISON-RANA Rosso!! IMPA LOCK!! Rosso flails, reaches, fades out, ZELDA WINS!

Winner: Zelda, by submission (Rosso is ELIMINATED, Zelda and Fin Balure advance)

The Princess of Hyrule earns her spot in the Eventide Challenge match at Treasure Island! The Prince comes along for the ride, but which wrestling royal takes the throne?

Zelda is given the mic to speak to the audience. She seems a bit surprised and maybe reluctant, but she takes a deep breath to begin. “Lanayru Bay! We have our Eventide Six!” The fans cheer and Zelda thinks on what else to say. “I should say that I’m proud to see I’m not the only woman wrestler selected for the field of nine. And I’m glad to see I won’t be the only woman in the Eventide Challenge match.” Ashei is a great wrestler, she deserves to be in this match, and Zelda looks forward to competing against her. In fact, Zelda looks forward to facing all the opponents in the match. But before she can praise the other finalists, Fin interrupts on a mic on the outside. “Take yer praise and shove it!” Fans boo but Fin keeps going.

“You think I care that you’re so happy for us?” If it’s true, then Zelda’s a fool. If it’s not, then Zelda’s a snake. Either way, Fin warns Zelda, he warns “that chick with the weird hair,” and all the others in this match. He’s going to cut down anyone that gets in his way, grab that prize, and then go after whoever leaves the island Triforce Champion. Then he won’t just be the Zora Prince, he’ll be the Zora KING.

But wait! The other competitors return from backstage! Ashei and Garo Master, as well as Master Kohga and Groose! Groose wants Fin to say that all to his face while getting in Fin’s face. “Back off, big man, or I’m gonna cook that cucco on your head and serve it to ya!” Referees rush in to keep this from breaking down into a brawl. Fin leaves through the crowd while Groose is kept at ringside, and both Garo and Kohga laugh and applaud the “comedy” they’re seeing before them. Tensions are mounting between the Eventide Six already, what happens when it finally explodes at Treasure Island?


My Thoughts:

Turns out three Triple Threats takes quite a lot to come up with. And thinking about it like a real wrestling promotion, there should’ve been another event booked between this and the Treasure Island event I have planned, but that would really only feature filler matches like a Six Person Tag involving the Eventide Challenge participants. It’s standard formula but it’s still filler. I probably do need to consider having those, because real promotions would at least give their world champion “tune up” matches. Link could probably benefit from having easy squash matches, or even a match in the vein of Jon Moxley “struggling” against Robert Anthony. But that’d also be a lot of extra work that I can’t always give time to. Maybe I can figure something out as we still have months left in the year.


Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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