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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (3/19/21)

Who will be the Fastlane enforcer?

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Coverage SmackDown 2021

Edge returns to action on SmackDown for the first time in ELEVEN YEARS!

The Rated R Superstar returns to in-ring action on SmackDown! And he’s going to fight “Main Event Jey” to see who joins Fastlane as special guest enforcer for the Universal Championship match!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • SmackDown Women’s Championship: Sasha Banks VS Nia Jax w/ Shayna Baszler; Banks wins and retains the title.
  • The Street Profits VS Rey & Dominik Mysterio; The Mysterios win.
  • Rey & Dominik Mysterio VS Chad Gable & Otis; Gable & Otis win.
  • King Corbin VS Sami Zayn; Corbin wins.
  • Bianca Belair w/ Sasha Banks VS Shayna Baszler w/ Nia Jax; Belair wins, by disqualification.
  • Edge VS Jey Uso; Edge wins and will be special guest enforcer at Fastlane.

PLAY BY PLAY

Sasha Banks and Bianca Belair argue at the curtain!

The Boss doesn’t feel the need to apologize for anything, but The EST doesn’t why Sasha is taking this title match tonight. Nia Jax could beat both of them, not saying she will, but what is Sasha thinking? Sasha says this is because of Reginald! Oh so he’s still part of this? Sasha screws Bianca up last week but somehow Reggie is still on her mind? Sasha says the one in her head is Nia, the woman she will beat tonight. Bianca says Sasha really has an ego. The Boss, the Standard, made a bad decision. And Bianca is not going to save her. Sasha wasn’t going to ask her to. But then is she going to cost herself her SmackDown Women’s Championship just days from Fastlane?

SmackDown Women’s Championship: Sasha Banks VS Nia Jax w/ Shayna Baszler!

Arguing with her Fastlane tag partner before going for the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships isn’t a good sign. Will the Legit Boss at least handle business against the Irresistible Force tonight? Or will Nia become the Irresistible Double Champion on the Road to WrestleMania?

Apparently, Reginald is on a spa day, so he won’t even be a factor here ringside. Will that at least mean things are fair for Sasha?

The introductions are made, the SmackDown Women’s title belt is raised, and the go-home begins with gold!

Nia talks smack about having Reggie on her side and then pie faces Sasha. Sasha SLAPS Nia, wrecks Shayna with a dropkick, then kicks Nia away! Sasha goes up to give Nia NIGHTSHADE! Sasha stomps Nia down, but lets off as the ref counts, to then run side to side for a METEORA! And a BULLDOG! Sasha wants the crossface but Nia powers out! Nia shoves Sasha then CLOBBERS her with an elbow! Sasha gets to a corner, Nia SPLASHES her! Nia brings Sasha around, scoops her, military presses the Boss, and DROPS her! Cover, TWO! Nia drags Sasha back up, scoops her again for a SLAM! Nia keeps talking smack as she runs to drop an elbow! Cover, TWO!

Nia keeps on Sasha with a whip and a BODY ATTACK! “It’s over now.” Nia fireman’s carries for a SAMOAN DROP! Cover, TWO!! Sasha survives and shocks Nia! But wait, here comes Bianca! Did Bianca change her mind about bailing the Boss out? Sasha gets out of the ring and Bianca is there to coach her up, but the SmackDown Women’s Champion is in a bad way as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Nia grinds Sasha down with a chinlock. Sasha fights up, fights out with elbows then whips, but Nia blocks to reverse. Sasha goes up, Nia catches her and drags her to a SPINNING SIDEWALK SLAM! Cover, TWO! Nia drags Sasha around to stomp on the legs a la Shayna, then she gets a STRETCH MUFFLER! Nia carries Sasha around, and then SWINGS her into the buckles!! Cover, TWO!! Sasha survives and Nia is pulling at her hair! Nia cools off, drags Sasha around again, then leans on a leg to get the chinlock. Sasha endures this modified STF, throws slapping shots, but Nia lets her go to get the Stretch Muffler again!

Nia carries Sasha around, but Sasha swings up to sunset flip! Nia stays up, sits down, but Sasha dodges! BLINDSIDE METEORA! Cover, TWO!! Sasha is shocked now but Bianca coaches her up. Sasha sits Nia up, tries to pull her up, but Nia throws Sasha out of the ring! Nia goes over but Sasha KICKS her! Sasha climbs on as a backpack but Nia powers her to a fireman’s carry! Sasha fights free with elbows, wants the crossface again but Nia scoops her. Sasha tilt-o-whirls to DDT! And then she gest the Bank Statement! Shayna shoves Bianca but Bianca chases her into the ring! The ref is busy with Bianca, Nia holds Sasha for Shayna, but Sasha gets away and Shayna’s KICK hits Nia!!

The ref sees Shayna but Bianca throws her out! Sasha jackknife covers Nia, Sasha wins!!

Winner: Sasha Banks, by pinfall (still SmackDown Women’s Champion)

Oh the irony! Sasha and Bianca were arguing, Shayna and Nia were united, but it was Shayna’s help that hurt Nia! Will the Women’s Tag Team Champions be able to get back on the same page so they can keep their tag titles from the #LegitEST?

 

Backstage interview with Edge.

The Rated R Superstar was, for many years, a cornerstone of SmackDown. How does it feel to have his first match back on SmackDown in over a decade? It’s crazy. This show has always felt like home for Edge. The best moments in his career happened here, like when he beat the Undertaker for the World Heavyweight Championship. But also, the worst moment in his career was when he had to give up that title and retire. With a lot of hard work and elbow grease, Edge is back on SmackDown again. It’s surreal, but it feels right. Just like it felt right to get involved with Daniel Bryan and Roman Reigns.

Edge says Bryan deserves his fair shot at Roman Reigns at Fastlane. Without Edge around, it won’t happen. Even though Bryan hit Edge with a knee, it’s fine. Edge would’ve done the same to Bryan. But that brings Edge to Jey Uso. Jey can be one of the best in this business, but not while he’s in Roman’s shadow. So long as Jey follows Roman’s shadow, he’ll keep getting into trouble. And tonight, that trouble is Edge. Will the Opportunist become the Enforcer for Fastlane?

 

BREAKING NEWS!

As announced on WWE’s official website and their various social media, WrestleMania is two nights, so it’ll have two hosts! Hulk Hogan and Titus O’Neil will be your co-hosts for WrestleMania 37!

 

Nia and Shayna talk backstage.

Nia is furious! She should be a double champion tonight, and she’s not, because Shayna ruined it! Shayna says it was Bianca’s fault. If Shayna costs them the titles this Sunday, Nia is letting her know that she will be coming for her! Shayna apologizes but Nia doesn’t want to hear it. She wants to know what Shayna’s going to do to make up for it. Shayna says she’ll go get a match with Bianca, kick her head off, and then give the nastiEST beating of her life. Will the Queen of Spades make up for depriving Nia of her moment?

 

Seth Rollins heads to the ring!

The self-professed Savior of SmackDown is back again, but what will he have to say? We’ll hear from the Architect, after the break!

SmackDown returns and Rollins says, “I recently made my triumphant return to SmackDown after a lengthy hiatus. And when I did, the entire SmackDown locker room came out to the ring, surrounded the ring, to greet me like a king.” Rollins says it’s not because they like him. Some might but most don’t, and that’s fine. But they greeted him because they respect him and what he’s done in the ring. So when they all turned their backs and walked out, Rollins respected their decision to be idiots. But there was one person who took that disrespect too far. “Cesaro stayed out here, by himself. He stood right there, he looked me in my eyes, he disrespected me, he hamulated me, he embarrassed me!”

And Rollins knows why! Cesaro is jealous of Rollins and his success! He’s jealous that Rollins is beloved and that Rollins is a WrestleMania main event while Cesaro is an abject failure. The big difference, even after all that, is that Rollins is a fight. You knock him down, he gets right back up. And after what Cesaro showed us last week, he can’t say the same thing. Rollins cues footage of Rollins attacking Cesaro during his rematch with Buddy Murphy, giving Cesaro multiple Curb Stomps! Cesaro tried to stand after but couldn’t. Rollins in the present mocks wobbly Cesaro. “What’s keeping you down, Cesaro? You having a hard time standing up for yourself?”

Rollins says maybe Cesaro tired himself out running around and reaching for the brass ring. But Rollins then gets serious and tells Cesaro to listen very closely: “You swung me 22 times! I counted. And you will never disrespect me or embarrass me like that again. Because I’m Seth Freakin’ Rollins. And you are the biggest waste of potential in the history of WWE.” But here comes Shinsuke Nakamura! Well talk about disrespect! Interrupting Rollins for what?! Rollins tells Nakamura to stay away or he’ll get what Cesaro got tenfold! Don’t disrespect Rollins! Nakamura is better than Cesaro so don’t do this! Nakamura ignores all Rollins’ ranting and takes the mic from him! “Shut. Up.”

Rollins swing son Nakamura, but Nakamura dodges to WHEEL KICK Rollins! Rollins sees Nakamura powering up and he bails out to avoid the Kinshasa! Nakamura dares Rollins to, “C’MOOON~!” Rollins gets in, but gets an STO! Nakamura powers up, KINSHASA!! The King of Strong Style leaves the Architect actually wobbling and staggering about. Will Rollins make good on his threat to give Nakamura the same treatment he gave Cesaro?

 

Another WWE Hall of Fame inductee has been named!

And it’s ERIC BISCHOFF!! The man who has had an immeasurable impact on the wrestling world, from running WCW to Monday Night Raw and innovating along the way, is now a WWE HOF’er!

 

The Street Profits VS Rey & Dominik Mysterio!

Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins are on the come-up, or rather the return back up, to those SmackDown Tag Team Championships! But will they be able to stay up against the father-son lucha duo?

SmackDown returns as the Mysterios make their entrance, and the current champions, Dolph Ziggler & Robert Roode, have joined commentary. The teams sort out, Ford starts with Dom and the two circle. They tie up, Ford waistlocks and throws Dom down to then float to a facelock. Dom slips out, hammerlocks then wristlocks, but Ford rolls and rolls and handsprings to sweep. Cover, ONE! Dom sweeps and covers, ONE! Ford arm-drags, Dom  arm-drags, and the two handspring to stare down. Dom offers a handshake, Ford takes it, but then Ford kicks low. Ford says Dom needs to get smarter. Ford back suplexes, Dom lands on his feet, and Rey tags in!

Dom whips Ford, Rey dropkicks Ford down! Cover, TWO! Rey brings Ford up, wrenches, but Ford blocks the whip to reverse. Rey kicks back, runs, slides under, Dawkins tags in! Ford runs Rey over, Dawkins gives him the boost, back suplex SPLASH! Dawkins covers, TWO! Ziggler tells Michael Cole to pay attention as Dawkins hits the CYCLONE SPALSH! Dawkins puts Rey in the Profits’ corner, tags Ford, and Ford whips Dawkins. Rey dodges, goes after Ford, Ford scoops him but Rey headscissors Ford onto ropes! Dom tags in, Dawkins DECKS Rey with an uppercut! Dom climbs up to leap and FLYING RANA Dawkins! Dom dials it up, into Ford’s LARIAT!!

Ford drags Dom up, and hits a back suplex to SLAM! Cover, TWO! Dom survives and Ziggler says this is just how Profits go. They do a lot of work but it never pays off. Dawkins tags in,. Electric Chair lifts Dom, but Rey knocks Ford off the corner! Dawkins BOOTS Rey, Dom victory rolls Dawkins up! THE MYSTERIOS WIN!

Winners: The Mysterios, by pinfall

The Ditty Dawgs have a laugh at how shocking that was! But before the Mysterios can actually celebrate, here comes the Alpha Academy! Chad Gable fires up Otis, but Gable wants the Mysterios to realize that win doesn’t put them in line for a title match before the Alphas. The Alphas already embarrassed “Shorty” when the number one pupil SQUASHED Rey like a pancake! And the Profits, no one cares about- The Mysterios dropkick the Alphas out! Then Dom springboards to CROSSBODY both Alphas! Now the Profits get to have a laugh! What’s going to happen after SmackDown returns from break?

 

Rey & Dominik Mysterio VS Chad Gable & Otis!

SmackDown returns and the father-son duo is in a double header! Gable already has Rey’s arm, Rey throws knees and haymakers, but Gable whips him to a corner! The Profits are on commentary now to counter the Dirty Dawgs, and Gable puts Rey up top. Gable climbs up, throws forearms, then brings Rey up. Rey resists, throws body shots back, then headbutts Gable down! Rey leaps, SEATED SENTON! Rey keeps moving, tilt-o-whirl headscissors puts Gable on ropes! Rey runs to dial it up, 619! Dom DECKS Otis, Rey climbs up top, but Otis is back to trip Rey! Rey lands back on the corner, Gable tags Otis in.

The Alphas drag Rey up to suplex to the mat! Otis drops a headbutt into ribs, then he drags Rey up to scoop and SLAM him! Otis drags Rey up to scoop and SLAM again! Otis stomps Rey, drags him up, and whips him to a corner hard! Rey bounces off buckles, falls over, and Gable talks trash. Otis drags Rey up tow hip again and CLOBBER him! Gable cheers Otis on and Otis drags Rey up to a bearhug! Rey endures the squeeze, and BITES Otis!! Rey is free, he kicks and runs, but into a snap scoop and SLAM! Otis runs but misses the headbutt drop! Rey gets up to dropkick Otis down! Both men crawl to their corners, hot tags to Gable and Dom!

Dom rallies on Gable with clotheslines and elbows, then dodges to hit a running Rana! Gable staggers into the wheelbarrow, but he powers up, only for Dom to swing around to a sunset flip! TWO, Dom runs in but Gable pops him up tot he corner! Dom comes back with a TORNADO DDT! Dom drags Gable to a cover, Otis breaks it! Rey runs in to DECK Otis off the apron! Rey keeps on Otis but Otis knees low! Otis throws Rey into the barriers! Dom runs, wheelbarrow swings and puts Gable on ropes! Dom dials it up, 619- BLOCKED! Gable gets Dom up, but Dom slips off. Gable switches, Otis tags in while Gable hits CHAOS THEORY!!

Gable sets Dom in the drop zone for Otis’ DOZER SPLASH!! Cover, the Alpha Academy wins!!

Winners: Chad Gable & Otis, by pinfall

The Dirty Dawgs are greatly impressed! But the Profits say they’re just dodging their challengers. The champions claim they welcome any takers, but then will they end up taking on all the tag teams we’ve seen tonight?

 

Sami Zayn is backstage with his camera crew.

He knows this happens every week, to where he should be used to it by now, but again the WWE sticks it to him. Sami has a match with Baron Corbin he didn’t sign up for! But hey! Kevin Owens comes by! Has Kevin given any thought to what Sami asked last week? About joining the documentary project. Kevin did think it over, but he still needs time. Sami tries to sell Kevin on this some more, and brings up Logan Paul. Logan Paul might even check this out! This is going to be huge! What is holding Kevin back?

Kevin asks Sami this: Has Sami ever considered that what’s happening is just Sami twisting reality to what he needs it to fit the narrative? They’ve both known each other a long time, but Kevin doesn’t remember Sami being like this in the past, claiming something wasn’t his fault. But this hasn’t been Sami’s fault! It’s not! How is Kevin saying this?! Kevin has seen what “they” have done to both of them! They who? Who is “They?” Sami can’t believe Kevin doesn’t see the obvious. Do Sami a favor, though. Be ringside for Sami VS Corbin. If Kevin sees something fishy, point it out. And if Kevin doesn’t see anything, then Sami will drop this whole thing, okay? Kevin agrees to that, but will he see things Sami’s way? Or how they really are?

 

Daniel Bryan heads to the ring!

The GOAT is going to Fastlane, but will he be going to WrestleMania? We hear his thoughts on his Universal Championship opportunity and more, after the break!

SmackDown returns and says, “Wow! What a night, what a night! In tonight’s main event, we have Edge VS Jey Uso, Edge’s first match on SmackDown in TEN YEARS!” And the winner gets to be the special guest enforcer for the Universal Championship match? WOW! If Jey wins, we all know what we’re going to get. Jey will do everything he can to make sure Roman wins. And if Roman was the champion he thought he was, he wouldn’t need that help. On the other hand, Edge is the Ultimate Opportunist. He will do anything he can to get what he wants, and what he seems to want more than anything is to face Roman 1v1 at WrestleMania.

Bryan gets it. It’s because Edge doesn’t want to face Bryan. Edge thinks he can beat Roman. But the difference between him and Bryan is that Edge thinks it, and Bryan knows it! Bryan will prove it at Fastlane when he makes Roman TAP OUT! But speaking of, here comes Roman Reigns! The Tribal Chief has his Special Counsel following after. Heyman hands Roman a mic and Roman talks to Bryan from the stage. “You’re going to tap me out? He’s going to tap me out. Look, DB. I can deal with you telling these little lies. Like a couple weeks ago, about being ambitious, about deserving to be in the main event of WrestleMania.” Roman can handle little fibs.

But Bryan’s going to lie about the Tribal Chief? Bryan can’t tap Roman out! He doesn’t stand a chance! Bryan has a better shot at shooting lightning out his ass or sprouting wings and flying out of here than tapping Roman out. Roman wants the “little man” to understand that NO ONE has made Roman tap out. Roman would rather lose his arm than tap out! And Roman would rather die in the ring than to lose to someone like Bryan. Would rather die? That’s rather strong. But Bryan wants Roman to understand that he’s talking about lies Bryan’s said. But all the things Roman’s said, Tribal Chief, Head of the Table, those are all delusions.

Everyone thins they’re invincible, until they’re not. Everyone thinks they’re unstoppable, until they lose. Everyone thinks they’ll never tap out, until they do. So Bryan won’t just make Roman quit, he will break Roman. He’s going to break Roman’s beliefs, of his delusions, and here’s the thing! Bryan hopes Roman doesn’t die. But if Roman taps out or doesn’t tap out, Bryan is beating Roman for the Universal Championship. Roman glares at Bryan as he leaves, but will the truth be revealed at Fastlane?

 

King Corbin VS Sami Zayn!

The moment NO ONE has been waiting for! The Wolf King and the Great Liberator have both been the least likeable, most irritating superstars on SmackDown, but now we’ll find who is the worst! Who wins a title no one wants, and who ends up the worst loser of them all?

The bell rings and the two rush each other. Sami knees low, headlocks, but Corbin pulls hair to throw Sami down! Sami scrambles to a corner, Corbin is after him but Sami kicks low. Sami scrapes Corbin’s face on ropes, CLUBS Corbin on the back then chokes him on the ropes. The ref counts, Sami lets off at 4, then he throws jabs. Sami whips but Corbin dodges to CLOBBER Sami! Corbin rains down fists, the ref reprimands but Corbin argues with him. Sami gets to a corner, Corbin runs in to corner clothesline! Corbin stalks Sami, Sami goes around the ref then gets a cheap shot on Corbin! Corbin rushes Sami but Sami POSTS Him! Cover, but Sami uses ropes!

The ref sees that and refuses to count! Sami argues that the ref should do his job! Sami stomps Corbin, then unties a buckle pad! Corbin rushes over but Sami elbows him away! The ref stops Sami from using the pad, but Corbin reels Sami in for an END OF DAYS!! Cover, Corbin wins!

Winner: King Corbin, by pinfall

Kevin was ringside as Sami wanted, but there wasn’t anything wrong with the referee’s officiating. Sami argues with the ref more but then he complains to commentary and Kevin. Kevin saw what he was talking to Sami about but Sami refuses to accept that! Kevin tells Sami he has to let this go but Sami is just getting angrier. Sami storms off, Kevin isn’t sure what to say about his behavior, but then Sami BOOTS Kevin!! “OPEN YOUR EYES! I’m not crazy, you’re blind!!” Sami storms off again, blaming the ref for this. How far will Sami’s paranoid, downward spiral continue?

 

BREAKING NEWS for Fastlane!

After both the encounter tonight and what Rollins did to Cesaro, the Savior of SmackDown will be facing the King of Strong Style in a match! Will Rollins be made to pay for what he did to the Swiss Cyborg?

 

Big E and Apollo Crews are interviewed by video.

These two are set to battle one more time for the WWE Intercontinental Championship, but are being kept apart so that no physical confrontation can happen. This battle has gotten personal, but will they ever be able to settle differences? Big E says that time is over. It is over, Apollo! They want to talk to Big E about reconciliation? We Are The World? No. All Big E wants to talk about is vengeance. Apollo has two days until Fastlane. And if Big E were him, Apollo should take those two days to appreciate the crisp March air. Take those two days to enjoy the normal function of limbs. Take those two very short days, and enjoy the present, because Apollo’s future is dark and bleak.

Big E says on Sunday, he will retain HIS title, no question. And Apollo… Apollo will get everything he deserves. Apollo’s response: He’ll get what he deserves? Big E better think carefully about his words because he is speaking to Nigerian royalty! Big E is treading dangerous ground. Does Big E understand what Apollo is saying? Apollo is reminded of an old Nigerian proverb his great-grandfather told those who threatened him. “You fill your mouth with a razor, and you will spit blood.” That is what is going to happen to Big E on Sunday at Fastlane! Apollo will crack Big E’s face, and see the Nigerian warrior within Apollo! Apollo will finally have what he deserves! Apollo’s ancestors will watch him stand over Big E’s mangled body as the NEW Intercontinental Champion!

Big E says why wait for Sunday? He takes off his mic and storms off camera, and so Apollo does the same! Big E goes out into the Tropicana and rides a golf cart to gorilla! He dares Apollo to bring his ass to the ring! Big E calls out Apollo as he rides, but where is Apollo? Apollo shouts back for Big E to find him! They cross paths and Apollo realizes Big E is in a golf cart! Big E almost runs Apollo over! Then they start brawling! Big E throws Apollo into a trash can, then uses the can to SMACK Apollo around! Big E throws Apollo into a cabinet! And then into a wall! And then stomps him on the floor!

Apollo can’t get away before Big E drags him up to throw him into another wall, and then back the other way! And then back the other way! Referees rush over, as do Adam Pearce and Jamie Noble! Apollo gets away, gets in the golf cart, and drives off! Big E is ready to bring out his rage! Will he humble the Nigerian royal when the gold is one the line?

 

Bianca Belair w/ Sasha Banks VS Shayna Baszler w/ Nia Jax!

After what happened during the SmackDown Women’s Championship match, the Queen of Spades wants to get payback on the EST! But will this be the nastiEST beating Bianca’s ever endured? Or will it just be a sweep that costs the tag team champions going into their title defense?

SmackDown returns and Shayna makes her entrance. Oh, and Sasha has her entrance separate from everyone else, because she’s Sasha. But then Sasha decides not to be in Bianca’s corner? She says Bianca has this, and the bell rings. Shayna rushes Bianca but Bianca dodges the kick! Bianca runs Shayna over, is confused as to what Sasha is playing at, but she scoops Shayna. Shayna slips out, shoves Bianca, then rolls to trip Bianca up! Shayna kicks and clubs Bianca and then tells Nia, “Look!” She throws Bianca out at Nia’s feet, and Shayna says it’s them together. Nia waves a hand dismissively and is making her exit?!

Shayna drags Bianca back into the ring and wants Nia to join in beating Bianca up, but Bianca SPINEBUSTERS Shayna! But wait! Natalya and Tamina attack instead!!

Winner: Bianca Belair, by disqualification

But they aren’t just hitting Bianca, they hit Shayna and throw her out! The second generation stars TOSS Shayna over the announce desk! Natty goes into the ring to get Bianca for haymakers! Bianca hits back! Bianca ROCKS Natty but turns around into a SUPERKICK from Tamina! Natty feeds Bianca to Tamina’s SWINGING SLAM! Nobody meana than Tamina, and the Queen of Harts is the Best of All Time! But will they be waiting on the other side of Fastlane for whoever are the WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions?

 

Edge VS Jey Uso!

Over a decade ago, we all thought we’d seen the last of the Rated R Superstar. But after a return in one Men’s Royal Rumble and then winning another, he’s back in the ring on his home, Friday Night SmackDown! But will he make this moment even greater by winning the right to be Fastlane’s Universal Championship special guest enforcer?

SmackDown returns again and Jey makes his entrance. Bryan is also on commentary to see this in person. The bell rings and Edge ties up with Jey. Edge facelocks, drags Jey down and covers, TWO! Jey gets to a corner and Edge stays back. They circle again, tie up, and Jey headlocks. Edge powers through to get a headlock on Jey, but Jey powers out. Edge runs Jey over, then hops over to go for a crossface! Jey gets away to the ropes again, and Edge waits for him to return. Jey and Edge throw forearms, Edge gets the edge, and Edge whips to knee Jey low. Edge KNEES Jey down, then waits for him to get up, so he can STOMP him down!

Edge wraps Jey’s arm around a rope and pulls! The ref counts, Edge knees the arm, then backs off. Edge drags Jey up, wrenches, hammerlocks then chicken wings. Jey fights off the crossface but Edge bails out. Jey pursues but Edge elbows Jey! Jey blocks a bump and throws shots! Jey RAMS Edge into steel steps! The ref counts, Jey rolls in the ring and waits on Edge. Jey builds speed to DIVE! Direct hit and Edge hits the desk! Edge is down, clutching his ribs, as SmackDown goes to another break!

SmackDown returns once more and Jey is stomping Edge over and over! Edge writhes from the pain in his back but gets up to back hand and forearm Jey! Jey ROCKS Edge with an uppercut, and then brings Edge up to suplex. Jey hangs Edge out to dry on the ropes, and Edge slumps to the apron from the pain in his ribs! Jey runs and BLASTS Edge off the apron! Edge hits barriers and then falls to the floor, but Jey goes out to fetch him. Jey drags Edge up, puts him in, and looms over Edge before he stomps him again! Jey drags Edge up with a facelock, then slides him into a post! Edge shouts in pain, but Jey goes out to pull Edge into the post!

The ref counts, Jey lets off at 4, and then Jey stands on Edge before climbing up and into the ring. Edge gets out from the corner and Jey drags him up. Edge throws forearms, winces from the pain in his ribs, and Jey blocks the whip! Jey kicks, Edge blocks but Jey DRAGON WHIPS the ribs! Jey goes to the corner, climbs up, and leaps, but Edge gets under! Edge runs, DOUBLE CROSSBODIES take both men down! Edge took the worst of that but fans rally on their screens. Jey and Edge slowly stand as a standing count climbs, and Edge BOOTS Jey down! Edge drags Jey up, hammerlocks Jey’s arm and RAMS it into buckles!

Edge hops up the corner, winces from the pain, but LEAPS to KNEE Jey’s arm! Cover, TWO! Edge drags Jey up, Jey rams into Edge’s gut! Jey shoves Edge to SAMOAN DROP! Cover, TWO!! Edge survives but Jey is too sore to be frustrated. Jey goes to a corner, climbs up, but Edge stops him with a haymaker! Edge climbs up, and hits a SUPER STEINER!! Edge crawls to a cover, TWO!! Jey survives but Edge is also too sore to be frustrated. Edge and Jey slowly stand again, and Jey is in a corner. Jey superkicks but is blocked! Edge kicks low, IMPALER!! Edge fires up and grits his teeth as he goes to the corner. Jey crawls, gets to his feet, but SUPERKICKS the Spear away!

Jey climbs up, USO SPLASH!! But Jey’s arm slows him down! Jey crawls and pushes Edge over for a cover, TWO!! That delay was enough for Edge to survive! Jey drags Edge up, Edge WRINGS the arm out! Edge runs and SPEARS!! Cover, Edge wins!!

Winner: Edge, by pinfall (Special Enforcer for Fastlane)

The Rated R Superstar didn’t need to be an opportunist, but he did find the opening he needed! And now, he’ll be ringside to make sure things are fair and square at Fastlane! But then he turns around into ROMAN’S SPEAR!! Roman tells Edge this is HIS show! Then Roman dares Bryan to do something! Bryan goes to the ring but Jey CLOBBERS him! Jey throws Bryan in for Roman’s SPEAR!! Roman says Bryan won’t tap him out. Roman says Bryan will never take the title out of his hands! Will it even matter that Edge is ringside? Will Roman still find a way to retain the title?


My Thoughts:

A very good SmackDown and a very good go-home. Opening with the SmackDown Women’s Championship was a good move, mostly because we knew somehow, someway, Sasha was retaining. I do like that the finish is helping to bring back the dysfunction between Nia and Shayna, though with the RawDown Women’s Tag Division being so scarce, I hope Shay-Nia doesn’t break up yet. I don’t see them losing the titles, if only because there will be more dysfunction between Sasha and Bianca than there is between Nia and Shayna. Natty & Tamina attacking during Shayna VS Bianca was also a good touch, I just wish there was time for them to have a match with Sasha & Bianca to at least see if they can take the title opportunity from them.

I’m glad to see we’re getting Rollins VS Nakamura at Fastlane, that makes sense in story. I just hope that if Cesaro shows up at Fastlane, he’s still on Nakamura’s side and not weirdly converted to Rollins’ side. Now Murphy helping Rollins would make sense in story, too, even if it’s disappointing that all Murphy has to fall back on is being Rollins’ sidekick again. Rollins VS Cesaro has to happen at WrestleMania, even if it’s just part of Night 1. Big E and Apollo Crews had a great interview segment, and a great brawl backstage. Their match really needs to be No Disqualification so they can unleash all of this animosity in the ring.

The tag team scene was really wild tonight, but it was all indicative of what we’re likely to get out of it. Mysterios beat Profits, Alphas beat Mysterios, and the Profits pinned the tag champions in the 8 Man, so there’s perhaps a Triple Threat #1 Contenders match coming, winners face Dirty Dawgs at Mania. The best part of Sami VS Corbin was the video package before it, calling it the opposite of all the classic sayings, like “Most anticipated” becoming “Least anticipated,” etc. Corbin gets the win because Sami was too busy trying to cheat, and of course Kevin doesn’t see things Sami’s way because Sami’s going nuts. This being why Kevin VS Sami happens is actually really clever, and it is definitely going to be big for Mania.

And once again, the main story, the best story, is the Universal Championship story. Bryan saying Edge doesn’t want to face him, saying he’ll tap out Roman, this is a great way to make Bryan’s Face persona as motivated and confident as his Heel persona. Roman had a good response, Bryan had a good counter, and Edge’s backstage interview to respond to it was good, too. Edge VS Jey was very good, though maybe had a rusty start because this was also Edge’s newest return to a singles match. It got really good by the end, but of course Edge wins because it does fit Bryan’s own promo that sure, Jey will stack the deck in Roman’s favor, but Edge is a wild card.

Roman attacking Edge and Jey getting the jump on Bryan is a natural move, but I don’t know if Roman standing tall will make the math go in Bryan’s favor. Edge could help Bryan screw Roman over, Edge could “inadvertently” mess Bryan up, who knows. But there’s less predictability here, and maybe, just maybe, we could end up with a Triple Threat at Mania.

My Score: 8.5/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (3/18/24)

Talk about a Big Time Raw!

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Will The Man be the Last Woman Standing?

Becky Lynch and Nia Jax want to finally put this to an end, so tonight on Raw, it will be a Big Time Last Woman Standing match! Will the Irresistible Force force the WrestleMania 40 match to change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: #DIY VS The Creed Brothers; DIY wins and advances to WrestleMania.
  • Candice LeRae & Indi Hartwell VS Kayden Carter & Katana Chance; Candice & Indi win.
  • Dominik Mysterio w/ JD McDonagh VS Ricochet; Ricochet wins.
  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The Awesome Truth VS Indus Sher; The Awesome Truth wins and advances to WrestleMania.
  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The New Day VS The Alpha Academy; The New Day wins and advances to WrestleMania.
  • Last Woman Standing: Becky Lynch VS Nia Jax; wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Jey Uso is here!

North Carolina State University fires up and bounces along with Main Event Jey, and Pat McAfee plays a dangerous game standing on the armchairs! From Bret VS Owen to Matt VS Jeff, we’re about to get Jey VS Jimmy in the third-ever Brother VS Brother WrestleMania grudge match! Jey gets the mic as fans chant “YEET! YEET! YEET!” Jey welcomes us to Monday Night Raw, and wants us to check this out. He knows his brothers are somewhere in the building. He knows The Bloodline’s in the building. He knows how the Bloodline rolls! SO Big Brother Jimmy, where you at?! Where you at, Uce!?

Jey waits for someone to show up somewhere, and the crowd spots them first! Fans boo as Jimmy & Solo make their way from the back of the stands. Jimmy gets a mic and goes to the apron while Solo paces around the outside. Fans chant “YEET! YEET! YEET!” again as Jey puts the sunglasses aside. The Usos stare each other down, the fans now chant “UCE! OH! UCE! OH!” Jey wants to say something, hesitates, but then says these two would always get to it but they always knew how to shake right back to this. But now it’s different. Regardless of what happened, the bad blood between them, Jey misses his brother. He does.

Jey knows Jimmy will say what he wants, but Jey doesn’t talk to him no more, doesn’t ride with him no more, doesn’t even see him no more! Jimmy can just come back. Jimmy says he never left! He protected Jey! Jey’s so dumb, he can’t see it! Jimmy is protecting Jey! It was Jey’s idea to leave The Bloodline, but Jimmy helped because he is Jey’s brother. So yeah, Jey leaves, and what happens? Lil’ Bro becomes the BIGGEST star on the Raw roster! Lil’ Bro becomes the top merch seller! Lil’ Bro goes off to become a tag team champion without Jimmy, but with CODY RHODES!? Who left who, Uce?

Jey forgot Jimmy! Everything Jey did that was big was cuz of Big Bro Jimmy! Everything! So listen loud and clear. The biggest moment in Jey’s career, the BIGGEST moment, is because of Jimmy! Jimmy stares Jey down, but Jey says no. Jey’s biggest moment in his career is going to be his dream match at WrestleMania 40: Jey VS Jimmy, and Jey knocks the yeet out Jimmy’s ass! Jey DECKS Jimmy, DECKS Solo off the apron, but then Jimmy SUPERKICKS Jey down! The fans boo but now Solo storms in and looms over Jey. Solo drags Jey up so Jimmy can look him in the face and tell him that Jey needs to get it right! JIMMY made Jey!

But here comes Cody Rhodes! The fans fire up as Cody DECKS Jimmy, then gets in to springboard and CODY CUTTER Solo!! The American Nightmare said he was gonna be a Bloodline Hunter, and he made sure they didn’t take out Jey! Cody tells The Bloodline it is only a matter of time before they lose it all at WrestleMania! Will Jey prove that younger or older doesn’t matter when he is the BETTER brother?

 

Adam Pearce is on the phone.

He’s telling Nick Aldis to stop being a hypocrite, telling Pearce to keep his roster in check when this is happening. But then Paul Heyman walks over and Pearce says he’ll call Aldis back. Pearce then asks Heyman what was all that, and Heyman says he owes Pearce an apology. He is sorry. That was not authorized by The Final Boss nor The Tribal Chief, and certainly not by Heyman. Jimmy & Solo went into business for themselves so Heyman apologizes. But listen, Pearce knows that there have been flight delays all day. Even private jets like theirs. Heyman is barely even dressed for TV, let alone has his make-up!

Pearce says those two were ready. Yeah, well, they got in on a different flight. But Roman Reigns is a chief of his word. Those two are already gone, out of the arena, and Pearce has Roman’s word. Call his bluff, put out a search party. Pearce knows Heyman is here on official business, which Heyman will handle, and then be gone. That is it. But when Heyman does his official business… everyone will be caught off guard. “And Mr. Pearce, sir, that’s not a prediction. That’s a spoiler.” The Wise Man heads out and calls Roman, but just what is Heyman teasing?

 

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: #DIY VS The Creed Brothers!

Unlike SmackDown’s mini-tournament, Raw and Adam Pearce say it’s win and you’re in! Tommaso Ciampa & Johnny Gargano want one more shot at Judgment Day, but so do Julius & Brutus! Will the Sicilian Psycho & Johnny Wrestling prove that when it comes to Mania Moments, you gotta do it yourself? Or will the Creeds be bringing golden tickets to the Diamond Mine?

Raw returns as The Creeds make their entrance. The teams fist bump to show respect, then the teams sort out. Julius starts against Ciampa, they circle and tie up. They’re in a deadlock, Ciampa goes for a waistlock but Julius facelocks. Julius wrangles Ciampa to the mat, flips him over, ONE, and Ciampa keeps moving. They trade facelocks, gator roll, and Julius gets another lateral press. ONE, but Julius gator rolls Ciampa around. Ciampa fights up, puts Julius on ropes, and the ref counts. Ciampa lets off, then CHOPS! Julius shoots in for the takedown! Julius has a leg, Ciampa fights but Julius turns him for the ANKLE LOCK!

Ciampa scrambles to the ROPEBREAK, and Julius lets off cleanly. Ciampa bails out, shakes it off, and he gets back in. They go again, Julius hits a fireman’s carry takeover! Tag to Brutus, and Julius feeds Ciampa to another fireman’s carry takeover! Brutus cording holds but Ciampa endures. Ciampa fights up, but Brutus facelocks. The fans rally as Brutus switches and rolls Ciampa. Ciampa fights up, headlocks, then ROCKS Brutus! Brutus DECKS Ciampa, then whips him to ropes. Ciampa ducks ‘n’ dodges, tag to Gargano! Ciampa slides, CHOPS, Gargano LARIATS and Ciampa JAWBREAKERS! Wrench and LARIAT!

Julius runs in, Gargano kicks and Ciampa gives him the boost for SLICED BREAD! The Creeds bail out, but DIY DOUBLE PLANCHA! Down go the Creeds, and DIY applaud and pat themselves on the back. The fans fire up and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Ciampa has Julius in a chinlock. The fans rally, Julius fights up to throw body shots, but Ciampa hits a back suplex! Julius lands out of it, but Ciampa elbows him away. Ciampa drop toeholds Julius, gets legs, but Julius BOOTS Ciampa away! Hot tags to Gargano and Brutus! Brutus rallies on DIY, TOSSES Gargano, then blocks Ciampa’s kick to get under and POWERBOMB him! Brutus sees DIY regroup, then he runs in to SPLASH them both! O’Conner on Ciampa, but Gargano runs up! NORTHERN LIGHTS! Brutus has a DOUBLE BRIDGE, TWO!! Tag to Julius and he gut wrench SLAMS Brutus on Ciampa!

Brutus helps Julius flip up and over to SPLASH onto Ciampa! Cover, TWO! The fans rally up as Julius drags Ciampa up. Ciampa throat chops! A bit dirty but Ciampa wants that win! Ciampa storms up on Julius, but Julius basement stalling suplexes!! The fans are thunderous, Gargano runs in, but Brutus intercepts! Brutus suplexes Gargano now, stalls, and then the Creeds SLAM and kip up! Then they both STANDING MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Ciampa stays in this for DIY but the Creeds keep cool. Julius stomps Ciampa, tags Brutus, and they KNEE Ciampa around! Then they DOUBLE GUTBUSTER! Ciampa sputters but Brutus tags Julius in.

Julius drags Ciampa up, tags Brutus back in, and Brutus climbs. Julius Electric Chair Lifts, but Gargano makes the save! Gargano ROCKS Julius, Brutus ROCKS Gargano! Ciampa BOOTS Brutus, Gargano swings on Julius but is sent into Ciampa! Ciampa pushes Gargano back so he can ELBOW Julius! DIY set up again but Brutus stops the Sliced Bread! Julius DECKS Ciampa, KNEE into the WIDOWMAKER! Julius scrapes Gargano out, Brutus POUNCES Ciampa over the desk! Pat fires up with Brutus and so do the fans! The Creeds say they run this now, and then Brutus drags Ciampa up while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Julius has Ciampa in a chinlock. Ciampa fights up, and he JAWBREAKERS free! Ciampa ELBOWS Brutus down, BOOTS Julius, then runs up, only for Julius to catch him and toss him back! But then Ciampa catches Julius for a REVERSE DDT! The fans fire up while both men are down and crawling! Hot tag to Gargano! Gargano slingshots to KICK Julius, then he CLOBBERS Brutus! ENZIGIRI for Julius, then he runs to DOUBLE KNEE Brutus! BULLDOG LARIAT COMBO! The fans fire up with Gargano while Julius ends up in another corner. Gargano runs in but is put on the apron!

Gargano GAMANGIRIS Julius, SUPERKICKS Brutus, then SLINGSHOT SPEARS Julius! Cover, TWO! Julius survives but Gargano puts him in a corner. Gargano CHOPS, then hoists Julius up top. Tag to Ciampa, Ciampa CHOPS Julius while Gargano DIVES onto Brutus! Ciampa CHOPS Julius again, goes up top, and fireman’s carries! Ciampa then tucks Julius in for the SUPER AIR RAID CRASH! Cover, TWO!! Julius survives again and shocks Ciampa! The fans are just as stunned, but Ciampa and Julius sit up. Ciampa stands, and he CHOPS! And CHOPS! Julius sits back up as Ciampa puts some stank on the CHOP!

Julius brings the straps down! Julius fires a forearm, Ciampa hits back, and the fans fire up as the shots keep going! They go faster and faster, harder and harder, meaner and meaner! The fans fire up as this just turns into a brawl of haymakers and SLAPS! Ciampa then gets around, ripcord and HAYMAKER! ROLLING- TACKLE from Julius! And then the ANKLE LOCK!! Ciampa reaches out, moves around, but Gargano runs up! Julius kicks him, then gets him up with one arm to POWERBOMB! Then it’s back to the ANKLE LOCK on Ciampa! Brutus gets in to get Gargano for an ANKLE LOCK of his own!

The fans are thunderous as DIY endures! Ciampa and Gargano fight, turn things over, SICILIAN CROSSFACE and GargaNO Escape!! The fans are thunderous as The Creeds power up and lift both DIY! They fireman’s carry, then TOSS DIY into each other!! The fans are thunderous as Julius goes up to MOONSAULT onto Ciampa! Brutus MOONSAULTS, too! Cover, TWO?!?! Ciampa survives and the fans are loving this! Julius tags back in, Brutus climbs up! “This is Awesome!” as Julius Electric Chair Lifts Ciampa! But Ciampa VICTORY ROLLS to get under the Brutus Ball!! Cover, Brutus tips it! Gargano TOSSES Brutus then SUPERKICKS Julius!! Ciampa has the cover, DIY WINS!!

Winners: DIY, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

Julius can’t believe it! He kicked out at 3.1, but a loss is a loss! And for the first time ever, DIY is going to Mania! Will Philadelphia soon be historic for a DIY championship victory?

 

Judgment Day meets backstage.

Rhea Ripley is with Dominik Mysterio, Finn Balor & JD McDonagh, but also Andrade. Dom says he’s always liked Andrade’s style, but things have changed since the last time he was in the WWE. The Judgment Day runs Raw now. Rhea says yeah, and they don’t extend invitations to just anyone. Judgment Day is very exclusive. JD says very exclusive. But if Andrade continues to impress them, they’ll see about making things happen. And Finn says he just heard that Andrade has a match next week, so the Judgment Day will be watching him. Sounds good. See you next week. But then in steps Damian Priest.

The Punisher says hello to El Idolo, and El Idolo says hello to Senor Dinero. Andrade heads out, will he quite literally win his way into the club? But as for Priest, Finn asks him what he was up to. Priest was getting a closer look at that DIY VS Creeds match. DIY won, but whatever, they can handle those guys. But JD, they thought he could handle Ricochet last week, and run the gauntlet, and then go to WrestleMania to bring even more gold back to Judgment Day. JD says he did he belonged in there. But also, he battered Ricochet, who got lucky at the end there. Right, Finn? Finn hesitates, and Rhea says Priest is right on this one.

Ricochet made a fool out of JD! A fool? Yes. A fool? Yes. That’s why tonight, Dom will make it right. Right, Dom? Yeah, Mami. Let’s go talk to Pearce to make it official. Dom & JD head out, and the others are confident Dom’s got this. But does he, though? Or will the One and Only have two wins over Judgment Day in as many weeks?

 

Candice LeRae & Indi Hartwell VS Kayden Carter & Katana Chance!

The Poison Pixie certainly lived up to that name last week when she bullied Maxxine Dupri as part of beating her and Ivy Nile last week. Will Candice’s toxic tongue strike again? Or will the party not be stopped by her harsh vibes?

The teams sort out and Candice starts against Kayden. Candice rushes up, Kayden gets around and O’Conner Rolls, TWO! Kayden springboards to basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Kayden stalks Candice, Candice ELBOWS her away then tags Indi. Kayden dodges Candice to SUPERKICK, but Indi BOOTS Kayden! Cover, TWO! Indi drags Kayden up, tags Candice back in, and they mug Kayden. Candice CLUBS away on Kayden, fires off furious fists, then covers. TWO, and Candice grows frustrated already. The fans rally, Candice steps up but Kayden avoids the senton! Tags to Katana and Indi! Katana blasts past Indi, comes back and BULLDOGS!

Katana keeps moving, ducks ‘n’ dodges, then SHOTGUNS Indi to a corner! The fans fire up as Katana stomps away on Indi! Indi shoves Katana, Katana runs corner to corner to A-LIST LARIAT! Katana shoves Indi down, runs up, but into a back suplex! Katana lands out, but her leg jams! The ref and Kayden check, then the ref keeps Indi back. Indi says okay, and she stays by Candice. But Candice tags in to WRECK Kayden! And she SLAMS Katana’s leg into the post!! HALF CRAB and DEEP! Katana taps, Candice & Indi win!

Winners: Candice LeRae & Indi Hartwell, by submission

Candice smiles and celebrates with Indi, but Indi doesn’t want to. Candice says a win is a win, but just what is going on in her toxic mind?

 

Cody Rhodes makes his way to the ring.

NC State fires up again as The American Nightmare walks down the ramp, and this time the fans can sing along with the song, “WHOA~ OH~!” Cody gets his pyro then gets the mic. “In less than three weeks time, I will stand opposed for the second year in a row, in the main event, with the lights on brightest, I will challenge for the WWE Undisputed Championship, against the greatest champion in all of sports, The Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns. And this Friday on SmackDown, Roman and I are going to have a little conversation, if you will. But there are… complications. Factors, elements, combustible elements, namely… The Rock.”

Fans boo but Cody says The Rock took to Instagram on Friday, and followed it up with “extremely entertaining” concert. Too bad The Rock didn’t wanna be here tonight. Something Cody took from the Instagram post: The Rock referred to himself as “Our Favorite Heel.” A bit of an inside term, but we’re not dumb, we know that means he’s the “bad guy.” Cody has known Heels. Bobby Heenan, Arn Anderson, Michael Hayes, “Superstar” Billy Graham, “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair! Fans “WOO~” and Cody says he doesn’t think The Rock is a Heel. He’s just an assh*le. The fans go nuts hearing that!

Cody doesn’t want Rock getting upset, he doesn’t want the “seven bucks team” to get upset, he doesn’t want anyone getting emotional. Cody knows how Rock feels about emotions, he poked fun at Cody tearing up at discussing “finishing the story” with good friend, Michael Cole. There’s no crying in pro-wrestling, Jimmy Dugan, we get it. But hasn’t The Rock been crying behind the scenes this whole time? Once that hashtag came out, once fans chanted something else, The Rock cried to his buddies on the TKO board and said “Hey, this is gonna be some good PR for The Rock! I need to save WWE!” God knows, look at this house. They sure needed “saving,” huh?

The fans cheer but Cody says Rock wanted great PR. Until it wasn’t. TKO said OMG yes, put on the Gucci shirt, get those muscles looking big. It’s because they are Yes People, they are enablers, they won’t dare tell The Rock like it is, so Cody’s going to. Cody tells The Rock, “You’re a lot of things. You’re a lot of wonderful things. You are the Braham Bull, you are The Great One.” Cody still has shoes with The Rock’s logo on it! The Rock is the only guy Cody honestly feels is a Mount Rushmore wrestler. But he is also a terrible salesman, a carny succubus, and for those who don’t get what that means, The Rock is “a whiny b*tch!”

Fans lose their minds again but Cody says The Rock has been convinced otherwise. But don’t think that for two seconds this locker room needs The Rock more than The Rock needs it! That’s a rule of wrestling, nobody is bigger than the business! And sure, Cody brought up his mom, so it is fair game for The Rock to use that. But Cody knows The Rock’s mom. Here’s what Cody will tell us about The Rock’s mom. She is a wonderful lady, salt of the earth, she helped Cody chop Kevin in a dark match. Cody has nothing but respect for The Rock’s mom, something The Rock should’ve echoed back towards Cody’s mom.

But see, The Rock was talking about whipping Cody, handing a bloody weight belt to Cody’s mom, and normally someone as powerful as The Rock, Mama Rhodes would tremble. But The Rock doesn’t know Cody’s mom. Cody was more scared than she was, because she ain’t scared of nothing. This is the same woman who once jumped out of her chair at a Willie Nelson concert and beat up an undercover cop! She ain’t afraid of The Rock! Cody has been asked, April 6th, biggest tag match of all time, Rock & Roman VS Cody & Seth. Seth Rollins, the World Heavyweight Champion, a man The Rock should respect because that man has carried The Rock’s company!

How will Cody get past that match? How will April 7th look? Will it be a fair fight? Cody can tell us honestly… He doesn’t know. Cody does not know if it will be Bloodline Rules or not. Hell, he might not #FinishTheStory. “But Dwayne… What do you know? How can you be so sure of your own self, right?” The Rock hasn’t been in the ring in real action in years! April 6th, the bell is gonna ring, and what happens then? Is The Rock gonna bring The Great One, the hero we all had growing up? Is he bringing that #BigDwayneEnergy? Or is it gonna be LDS, Little D*ck Syndrome?! The fans chant “L D S! L D S!”

Cody says The Rock has referred to himself as The Final Boss. Kudos for that nickname, maybe he really is that. Maybe Cody is too naive to see it. But at WrestleMania, Cody doesn’t think The Rock will be The Final Boss. At WrestleMania, he’s just Roman’s side chick. But then ladies and gentlemen, his name is Paul Heyman, and he serves as The Wise Man to Your Tribal Chief, the reigning! Defending! Undisputed! WWE Universal Heavyweight Champion, Roman… Reigns! And as Special Counsel to the Bloodline, Heyman is here to say to Cody that the ideals that Cody and Heyman share are far greater than the interests on which they conflict.

By example, don’t you hate it when someone comes out to demand an apology? Not that Cody’s done that, but Heyman is still going to do that. Heyman came out here with some “friends” of his, and he apologized. For a Wise Man, that was pretty freakin’ stupid. One: because it didn’t work. Two: because it was just dumb. And for that, Cody, to you and the fans, Heyman humbly apologizes. Cody says whoa, whoa, whoa. He didn’t ask for an apology, and he certainly knows Heyman wants permission to be in the ring. Heyman is a Hall of Famer starting this year, if he wants into the ring, be Cody’s guest.

Heyman thanks Cody for that but he’s fine on the apron. He carries with him a message from The Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns. Talk about Heels… You may think of Heyman anything negative you want, and that might be understanding the obvious. Heyman is not trustworthy, but Roman is a chief of his word. Heyman assures that this Friday on SmackDown, Roman will be face to face with Cody. American Nightmare, Tribal Chief, challenger and champion. And when they are face to face, there will not be a single other member of The Bloodline in sight. Except for Heyman, but he is no physical threat.

Heyman holds the title belt, the beads, whispers things in Roman’s ear, such as his love and respect. But Cody has Roman’s word that if he shows up on SmackDown, Roman will show up alone. Cody says Roman shows up alone, no Bloodline outside of Heyman, it’s a deal. They good? Heyman has some jet lag, he forgot one little point. And don’t boo him, he’s talking to Cody! Cody says yes they’re booing, and he’s about to go full Homelander and rip Heyman’s throat out if he doesn’t get to the point. Fans like the reference. Heyman composes himself and says if Roman Reigns shows up alone this Friday on SmackDown, then Cody must show up to SmackDown alone, too.

Cody steps closer to Heyman and Heyman is a bit nervous. Cody tells Heyman, “Deal!” They shake hands, and Heyman smiles. The Wise Man negotiated a purely one-on-one meeting between his Tribal Chief and American Nightmare, but can we trust Heyman was telling the truth about Roman telling the truth?

 

Nia Jax speaks.

“You know what I’ve realized? Becky Lynch has never beaten me. And after tonight, she never will. Because after I break her face again, I will be taking her spot at WrestleMania. I will finish business with Rhea Ripley, and not only will I walk out the Last Woman Standing, but I will become Women’s World Champion.” The Irresistible Force is ready for the Big Time, but will she A-Nia-late her?

 

Cody Rhodes returns backstage.

And Jey says there he go! But real quick, Cody can’t be going to SmackDown alone. Cody says he gave them his word. But The Bloodline isn’t gonna play fair! They’re all gonna be there! If Cody needs Jey, Jeys’ got him. Cody hears that, but he knows what he’s dealing with. They shake hands and Jey heads out. Will Cody be able to have that fair, one-on-one meeting? Or does Jey have a point about The Bloodline?

 

Dominik Mysterio w/ JD McDonagh VS Ricochet!

It seems Pearce agreed to the idea that Dirty Dom should try and clean up The Irish Ace’s mess. Will Dom be able to get revenge on Ricochet? Or will Ricochet be the One and Only person holding their head high tonight?

Raw returns and Dom has made his entrance. The bell rings, Dom and Ricochet circle, and they tie up. Ricochet waistlocks, Dom fights the lift and grabs ropes. The ref counts, Ricochet lets off, but Dom ELBOWS him away! Dom fires hands, soaks up the heat, then storms up, but into haymakers! Ricochet CHOPS, kicks then flexes on Dom. Ricochet whips, Dom reverses, but Ricochet goes up and over. Ricochet ducks ‘n’ dodges to then handspring back elbow! The fans fire up while Dom bails out! JD is there to coach Dom up, but Ricochet runs in! JD gets Dom to safety, but Ricochet handsprings to hero land!

The fans fire up, Ricochet then goes to ropes to TORNILLO PLANCHA! Direct hit on Dom and Ricochet tells JD to back off. Ricochet puts Dom in, Dom distracts the ref, but JD grabs Ricochet’s leg! Ricochet kicks JD away, but then Dom WRECKS Ricochet with a dropkick! Dom soaks up the heat and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Dom has Ricochet up top. Dom climbs but Ricochet throws body shots! The fans rally behind Ricochet as he sends Dom staggering. Ricochet hops down as Dom comes running back, and Ricochet GAMANGIRIS him away! Ricochet then springboards, but Dom trips him up! Ricochet flops to the mat, then Dom kicks and FACEBUSTERS! Cover, TWO! Ricochet is still in this and JD argues the count. Dom looms over Ricochet, scuffs him around, then mockingly cheers him on. Fans boo but Dom brings Ricochet up. Dom gives some Latino Heat, then suplexes! Uno Amigo, but fans boo.

Dom gets Ricochet up but Ricochet suplexes Dom instead! And then fireman’s carry, DYNAMITE KICK! Cover, TWO! Dom is still in this and JD coaches him but the fans rally for Ricochet. Ricochet stands, storms up on Dom, but Dom shoots around to roll him up! With tights! TWO, Ricochet blocks a kick and KICKS Dom down! Ricochet hurries up top, the fans fire up, but Ricochet has to bail out of the 450 as Dom moves! Dom runs in again, but into a SUPERKICK! JD gets on the apron, so Ricochet triangle jump DROPKICKS! But then Dom DROPKICKS Ricochet onto ropes! Dom dials it up but Ricochet ducks!

Dom spins around, into the RECOIL!! Cover, Ricochet wins!

Winner: Ricochet, by pinfall

But then JD runs in! Ricochet dodges, goes up and around, BOOTS JD away, then BOOTS him again! Ricochet even flips up and out of the ring at the same time! Ricochet gets the better of Judgment Day again, just how disappointed is Mami going to be in her Latino Heat this time?

 

Sami Zayn is backstage.

He finds Chad Gable and wants to talk with him. Last week’s match, that was an honor. Sami hasn’t been pushed like that in a long time, it could’ve gone either way. Gable says yeah, it was great. Thanks. Is Gable alright? Yeah, he’s fine. Kinda feels like not… Gable says he’s fine, so leave it at that. C’mon, man, how many years have they known each other? Sami knows when something’s bothering Gable, so he should just say it. Gable says look, last week, the WrestleMania opportunity, the whole thing, it just meant more to him. Sami says he’s been hearing Gable say that for weeks, and it is really unfair.

Does Gable really think he’s the only one this title opportunity matters to? Sami has a family, too! Sami’s kid cries when Papa loses a match, too. Sami has people he’s let down and is trying to make proud. After all the years put into this, Gable can’t tell Sami what matters more because he doesn’t know Sami like that. Gable has Sami calm down, and says he knows all that. But it isn’t all about that. Then what is all this? Gable says Sami can’t beat Gunther. Gable then leaves, and Sami is at a loss for words. Is this bitter side of Gable only going to get worse as we go down this Road to WrestleMania?

 

Adam Pearce is in the ring.

Raw returns with the GM by a table, and he welcomes us to a contract signing to make official the Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship for WrestleMania! The fans cheer, and Pearce introduces first, the challenger, Sami Zayn! The Great Liberator makes his entrance and the fans sing along with his song. Sami still looks troubled by what Gable said just moments ago, but he still high-fives fans and gets in the ring. Then Pearce introduces the longest reigning Intercontinental Champion of all time, Der Ring General, GUNTHER! The fans boo as Gunther walks in, having reached Day 647!

Gunther smiles as Sami watches him make his way down the ramp and into the ring. Pearce says we know how this works, but Gunther says before we proceed, let us call this what it is: the most important contract signing for the most important match in the history of this championship. And why, why, why is the challenger dressed no better than any of the bums in the audience? Fans boo but Sami just shrugs that off. Sami gets a mic to say that Gunther keeps sitting there all smug, and it’s really starting to piss Sami off. Gunther thinks this is just another day at the office, that he’ll steamroll through Sami like any other contender.

But with all respect to Gunther, he really has. He has beaten everyone that has come his way, and has done it on his own. Gunther doesn’t believe Sami can do it. A lot of people didn’t believe Sami at many points in his career. They didn’t believe he’d even make it to WWE, let alone win championships and main event a WrestleMania. And if you ask The Usos, they didn’t believe Sami would be one of the guys to end the longest tag title reign in WWE history, but he did! And one year later, he will make history again by ending the longest Intercontinental title reign in WWE history! Sami signs his part and pushes the contract over to Gunther.

The fans cheer Sami on but Gunther waits it out. Gunther tells Sami, what Sami should do is listen to his new friend, Gable. Gable doesn’t believe Sami can win. The people here cheer Sami, they probably even love Sami. But even they don’t believe Sami can win. And y’know, when Gunther looks Sami in the eyes, and if Sami was honest with himself, even Sami doesn’t believe he can win. So what Sami is doing right now is standing on Gunther’s doorstep and begging him to get the beating of a lifetime on the Grandest Stage of Them All! So whatever Sami has to do, from training to believing, just keep doing that. Because at WrestleMania, Sami’s dreams will meet reality.

Gunther grins and signs his part, and it is now official! Gunther then stands, title on his shoulder, and takes his leave. The fans boo, but then Sami tells Gunther to wait. Gunther steps back inside to hear Sami as Sami turns around. Gunther looks in Sami’s eyes and believes Sami doesn’t believe? Sami stands to get in Gunther’s face and dares him to look again. Get a good long look, because these are the eyes of the man who will take you down at Mania! The fans fire up, and now Sami leaves first. Gunther still just grins, but will Sami use a Helluva Kick to wipe that smile off his face?

We follow Sami as he storms backstage, right past DIY and The Awesome Truth. Truth asks what’s up with Sami, but The Miz says that is the mindset of WrestleMania right there. That’s what they need. DIY wishes Awesome Truth luck. Awesome Truth knows DIY is into the ladder match, and they are gonna have their own qualifier. Miz & Truth just need to beat… Indus Sher. Jinder Mahal tells Veer & Sanga to warm up for the match. They head out, and Truth says he feels sorry for whoever has to face those guys. Miz stares at Truth, and he has DIY hold off. Miz will explain. The Awesome Truth heads to gorilla, their match is next!

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The Awesome Truth VS Indus Sher w/ Jinder Mahal!

Miz wants a remix of the theme song but Truth says to just follow his lead. NC State knows what’s up, but will the Awesome Truth finally reach the top of the tag division 13 years after they first teamed? We’ll see, after the break!

Raw returns as Indus Sher makes their entrance, the Modern Day Maharaja by their side. The teams sort out and Truth starts against Sanga. The fans echo “WHAT’S UP?!” but Sanga roars! Truth is scared now so he tags Miz. Truth fires Miz up, Miz runs up and dodges Sanga to fire off haymakers! Miz kicks, whips, but Sanga blocks! Sanga whips and CLOBBERS Miz! Jinder nods as Sanga then scoops Miz and brings him over. Veer tags in, Sanga SLAMS Miz, then Veer ELBOW DROPS! Indus Sher say “NAMASTE!” but the fans say “WHAT’S UP!?” with Truth. Veer HIP DROPS Miz, then looms over him.

Veer eggs Miz on, drags him up with shoulder claws, and then steps over Miz for the neck wrench! Miz endures as Veer still digs a claw into his shoulder. The fans rally for Miz, Miz fights up and throws body shots! Miz reaches out but Veer knees low! Veer SHOVES Miz to the corner, runs in, but Miz BOOTS! Miz ELBOWS Sanga, but Veer catches him! Veer puts Miz back int he corner, but Miz ducks the boot to tag Truth! Truth dodges Veer and starts up the shoulder tackles! Truth gets around Veer to SPIN-OUT BOMB! The fans fire up as Truth shouts out Cena with “You Can’t See Me!” Truth runs to Five Knuckle Shuffle!

Jinder is not happy now as Truth fireman’s carries! But Veer slips free! Truth drop toeholds to the STF!! The fans fire up but Sanga stomps Truth! Miz fires off kicks on Sanga, then body shots! Truth joins in, they mug and whip Sanga, to DOUBLE DROPKICK! Sanga staggers around, Veer runs up, but into a full nelson! Truth and Miz combine for a SKULL CRUSHING LIE DETECTOR!! But Sanga whips Miz away! Miz WRECKS Jinder with it, but Sanga runs up! Sanga knocks Miz down, Miz anchors Sanga, Sanga ELBOWS Truth, Truth falls onto Veer for the cover! Awesome Truth wins!!

Winners: The Awesome Truth, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

The fans fire up, and Truth doesn’t even realize what happened! Miz celebrates with Truth and Truth puts it together! They’re now one of the six in the ladder match! Will this combination of teamwork and luck be just what they need to take those titles from Judgment Day?

 

Sami confronts Gable now.

Sami tells Gable to tell him why. Why what? Why does Gable think Sami can’t beat Gunther? Well you just saw why! With Gunther, it isn’t just physical, it is mental. Sami made his career out of being the underdog that crawls his way out of any hole he’s in, right? Just like last week! Sami found the window of opportunity to get out of a bad situation any time he can. Gunther’s on a different level! You gonna sit and wait for that window to appear? It doesn’t happen with Gunther! He’s a different beast, a different animal. If Sami doesn’t change his mentality, then he can’t beat Gunther. Gable leaves Sami with a lot to think again. Is there a way Sami can change enough to defeat Der Ring General?

 

CM Punk speaks.

“Do I plan at being in WrestleMania? WrestleMania is in Philadelphia, what’re the first four letters in Philadelphia? Phil. You can’t have WrestleMania Philadelphia without Phil. Whether I’m invited or uninvited, Punk will be there.” And next week in Chicago, Punk returns to Raw! Will the Second City Saint find a way to be part of the biggest WrestleMania ever?

 

Drew McIntyre is here!

The Scottish Terminator, or as his new shirt says, “The Savior of WrestleMania,” makes his way to the ring, NC State a bit torn about seeing him. But then Seth Rollins is here, too!? McIntyre is upset but the fans sing along, “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~!” as The Visionary struts his way out. Rollins swaggers right past McIntyre in his green storm pattern suit, and steps into the ring first. McIntyre frowns as he follows Rollins in, and sits in a corner. The fans continue to sing, which Rollins revels in for a moment. Rollins has the mic to then say, “RALEIGH, NORTH CAROLINA~! Welcome to Monday Night Rollins~!

“And Drew, hah, sorry, I didn’t even see you there. I was too busy, uh, y’know, soaking up the spotlight, right?” McIntyre has a mic to say, “Alright, here we go.” Here goes what, Drew? McIntyre says no, no, get it all out of your system, he knows Rollins has more! McIntyre can stay in the back while Rollins enjoys the spotlight, because after WrestleMania, that spotlight’s all McIntyre’s. Hey, hey, c’mon. Rollins is here with an honest cause. Rollins doesn’t like McIntyre, he thinks he’s stupid, a hypocrite, has said a lot of dumb things lately, but Rollins is here to admit that one thing McIntyre said is absolutely right and he wants to say it to McIntyre’s face, right here in Raleigh, in front of the fine people.

Now, they always say the first step to recovery is the hardest, so bare with Rollins. He has been working on this all week, but… “My name is Seth Freakin’ Rollins, and I’m a spotlight junkie.” The fans chant “Spotlight Junkie!” and also sing, but McIntyre says everything is just a joke to Rollins, isn’t it? Look at Rollins! He’s a parody of himself at this point. But honestly, McIntyre doesn’t care. He tried reasoning, he gave the answers, and now he only cares about their match and the world title. And you wanna know the real punchline, funny man? “What?” McIntyre says they say that because they’re happy McIntyre sidelined Punk, thanks for remembering!

But the punchline is when McIntyre beats Rollins for that title. The fans chant for “C M PUNK!” but McIntyre says don’t be ridiculous. Punk’s waiting until next week to return because he’d never show up in a place like Raleigh. The fans boo but McIntyre says see, they’re booing Punk! Punk is only getting off his couch to be at his local arena. Rollins tells McIntyre to shut up already. Oh, seems McIntyre got Rollins’ attention. Rollins takes off the sunglasses to say yeah, McIntyre has his attention. Because this isn’t a joke! When Rollins says he is a junkie, it isn’t a joke! He’s been doing this for 20 YEARS! Just like McIntyre!

And every time Rollins comes out of the curtain, that’s his fix. And it gets better and better every single time. Rollins comes out here, lays it all on the line, and it just gets better and better! When he hears the fans sing the song so loud, Rollins can barely speak, “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~!” That’s Rollins’ fix! That is the spotlight he craves, and y’know what? Rollins wants the spotlight as bright as it can possibly be. So yeah, McIntyre’s been busy online entertaining people with memes, so he hasn’t been listening to Rollins. So Rollins will get this through McIntyre’s thick skull: Night One, Rollins takes the biggest star in Hollywood and his side chick, and makes them his b*tches!

Then on Night Two, the biggest spotlight possible will be shined down on McIntyre and Rollins and the World Heavyweight Championship! McIntyre says all hail the savior, Seth Rollins! This is what McIntyre wanted! The passion and desire, not the stupid laughing and dancing. Rollins had McIntyre all the way to the finish. Rollins has done this 20 years, just like McIntyre. They’ve given their lives to this industry, and that is what the title is about! The wrestlers’ title, the workhorse championship! Rollins had McIntyre with him until he mentioned the bigger spotlight and how Rollins pins one of the biggest stars in the world.

Why can’t it just be about Rollins’ hard work to make that title, and all of McIntyre’s hard work to get this chance? Why can’t that be the reason they’re getting the biggest spotlight!? Rollins has had his priorities all backwards, McIntyre has been giving him all the answers. McIntyre said he is over the BS, and all he cares about is Rollins making it to the ring on Night Two. And if Rollins can’t walk, then McIntyre will wheel him down. If not, McIntyre will carry Rollins down. At Mania, McIntyre doesn’t get the moment he deserves. He gets the moment he has bloody EARNED. The fans do cheer that!

Rollins smirks and says, “Ah, Drew. There it is. That’s right, you wanna call me a spotlight junkie, but you want the spotlight just as bad as I do, don’t you? You’re an addict, just like I am. And you’ve been begging for spotlight for the past four years, because you won the WrestleMania main event. You did, back in 2020, in an empty warehouse. And all we’ve been hearing from Drew McIntyre for the past four years was how that wasn’t good enough. You’ve been whining and complaining and bitching and moaning that you deserve better, that you deserve more. The problem is, Drew, when everybody came back around, and the lights got bright again, what happened? You fumbled the ball.

“And that’s the difference between you and me. When the lights are the brightest, I shine, baby. I shine bright. And at WrestleMania 40, the lights are gonna be as bright as they have ever been. And you are gonna find out you are not as good as you think you are.” Rollins drops the mic, but this time McIntyre smirks. The verbal battle continues, but who will put their money where their mouth is once this one finally happens?

 

Becky Lynch speaks.

“I’m a wanted woman, and I don’t even have the title. Yet. But we’re less than three weeks away from WrestleMania, so why would I risk it all? Because I don’t know anything else. All I know is taking risks. All I know is fighting. And all I know is tonight, I’m gonna be the Last Woman Standing.” Becky is fired up to finally do what she hasn’t done in the most extreme way possible. Will she be the immovable object to Nia’s irresistible force?

 

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The New Day VS The Alpha Academy!

Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods have been W, W, E, World, Tag, Team, CHAMPIONS~, but they’ve never been a part of a title match as big as this Six Pack Ladder challenge! Will they look to be part of history once again? Or will Akira Tozawa & Otis say “A THANK YEW~!” for this golden opportunity?

Raw returns as the Academy makes their entrance. The teams sort out and Woods starts against the tree trunk, Otis. The fans rally for “NEW! DAY ROCKS!” Otis and Woods tie up, but Woods kicks low then headlocks. Otis powers up and out then runs Woods over! Otis storms up on Woods, GUT RAMS him back down, then brings him back up. Otis GUT RAMS Woods again, then runs to CLOBBER Woods! Otis swivels his hips, the fans echo “Oh~ yeah!” Otis tags Tozawa and the Academy mugs Woods. Tozawa brings Woods around but Woods CHOPS! Woods tags Kofi, he and Kofi double whip Tozawa but Tozawa holds ropes!

Tozawa fires hands, dodges Woods then BOOTS Woods down! Kofi kicks low, whips Tozawa to a corner, but Tozawa BOOTS Kofi away! Tozawa goes up to FLYING RANA! The fans fire up as Tozawa sees New Day regroup outside. Tozawa runs to DIVE! Direct hit on both New Day, and Otis joins in for “A THANK YEW~!” The Academy stands tall as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Tozawa fights a chinlock. Tozawa reaches for Otis but Woods back suplexes. Tozawa lands out to then DROPKICK Woods down! The fans rally as Woods and Tozawa crawl, hot tags to Otis and Kofi! Otis CLOBBERS Kofi, CLOBBERS him again, then whips him to ropes. WRECKER ELBOW! Woods runs in, Otis dodges, to LARIAT! Otis sees Kofi leap off the corner, and catches him for a WORLD’S STRONGEST SLAM! Otis rips the shirt off, winds up the hips, and then starts up the CATERPILLAR! ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Kofi survives but Otis hurries to step on him! Tag to Tozawa, and Otis goes up!

Otis VADER BOMBS but FLOPS as Kofi moves! Tozawa hurries up top while Kofi SUPERKICKS Otis! Kofi turns around into the CROSSBODY from Tozawa! Cover, TWO! Tozawa SUPERKICKS Kofi but Woods tags in! Woods GAMANGIRIS Tozawa, then steps in to TORNADO DDT! Cover, TWO! Tozawa toughs it out but Woods grits his teeth as he goes to the corner. Woods climbs, but Tozawa rises! Tozawa throws body shots, Woods CLUBS Tozawa! Tozawa throws more hands and climbs up! The fans rally as they brawl up top! Tozawa brings Woods up but Woods fights the lift! Woods throws body shots in return!

Woods shifts position to get under Tozawa for a fireman’s carry! But then Tozawa pops up to SUPER STEINER!! Tozawa rips off his shirt, climbs back up top, SUPER SENTON!! Cover, Kofi breaks it! The fans fire up but Otis drags Kofi out! Otis whips Kofi at steps, Kofi goes up and jumps off the steps to TORNADO DDT to the floor! Kofi hurries back up to the apron but Tozawa SCREW HIGH KICKS him down! Tozawa dodges Woods, pop-up, but Woods blocks the rana to then SPINNING POWERBOMB! Woods sees the WrestleMania sign, hurries up the corner, and he tightrope walks! LIMIT BREAK ELBOW!! Cover, New Day wins!

Winners: The New Day, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

The New Day are the ones saying A THANK YEW~ as they put their names down for the Six Pack Ladder Match! Will they once again climb to the top of the WWE Tag Team Division and bring home those championships?

 

Liv Morgan confronts Becky Lynch.

Becky asks if she’ll have to watch out for Liv as well. Well, you should always #WatchMe, but no, not tonight. Nia is all Becky’s. Liv just wants Becky to kick Nia’s ass. Liv leaves, will Becky kick ass and then some?

 

Cody walks with his dog, Pharaoh, backstage.

Rollins finds him and brings up Friday. One on one? One on one. Rollins nods and says he loves Pharaoh’s bandanna. The Visionary trusts the American Nightmare can handle himself, but will we be able to trust The Tribal Chief?

 

Last Woman Standing: Becky Lynch VS Nia Jax!

From the origins of “The Man” in WWE to the aftermath of Elimination Chamber: Perth, these two have battled, but never as brutally as this! They’re able to go anywhere and do anything, but who will be the Last Woman Standing this close to WrestleMania 40?

The bell rings and the two rush in! Becky DROPKICKS Nia and Nia goes to a corner. Becky runs in but Nia puts Becky on the apron. Becky ROCKS Nia, goes up a corner, then leaps to MISSILE DROPKCIK! Nia stumbles and tumbles out of the ring, so Becky WRECKS her with another dropkick! Becky then goes to the apron for a FLYING FOREARM! Nia stays up, Becky tries again, but Nia dodges! Fireman’s carry and Nia POSTS Becky, to then SAMOAN DROP her into barriers! The ref counts as Becky is down, but she stands at 4 of 10. Nia CLOBBERS Becky and wants the count! The count climbs but Nia is impatient.

Nia clears off the desk, Becky stands at 5 of 10, and she leans against barriers. Becky comes back with body shots and haymakers, but Nia ROCKS her with a forearm! Becky staggers away as Raw goes to break!

 


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Mitchell’s NJPW New Japan Cup Results & Report! (3/18/24)

The semifinals are here!

Published

on

We’re just one step away from the Cup!

Cold Skull faces The Fierce Warrior, and Gene Blast faces The King of Darkness, and when the smoke clears, we will have our New Japan Cup finalists!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Boltin Oleg & Shoma Kato VS Zack Sabre Jr. & Mikey Nicholls; ZSJ & Mikey win.
  • Six Man Tag: El Desperado, Tomohiro Ishii & Togi Makabe VS Just5Guys; Just5Guys win.
  • Tanga Loa & Ryusuke Taguchi VS Great-O-Khan & Callum Newman; Loa & Taguchi win.
  • Six Man Tag: YOSHI-HASHI, Toru Yano & Hiroyoshi Tenzan VS Bullet Club; Bullet Club wins.
  • 8 Man Tag: Shota Umino, El Phantasmo, Hikuleo & YOH VS The House of Torture; Shota, ELP, Leo & Yoh win.
  • Six Man Tag: Los Ingobernables de Japon VS The United Empire; LIJ wins.
  • 2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: Yota Tsuji VS EVIL; Tsuji wins and advances to the finals.
  • 2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: SANADA VS Hirooki Goto; Goto wins and advances to the finals.

PLAY BY PLAY

2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: Yota Tsuji VS EVIL w/ Dick Togo!

The Gene Blast overcame the tricks Ren Narita tried, but that’s because the House of Torture was saving all the good stuff so they could slay the Rampaging Dragon. Will the deck be even more stacked to make sure Everything is Evil’s? Or will Yota be one step away from LIJ VS LIJ at Sakura Genesis?

Well, Dick is making his way out here, but where is Evil? Oh, there he is. No tricks just yet it seems. But then Yota DIVES onto Evil! The fans fire up but Dick attacks Yota! Dick whips, Yota stops himself, and then scoops Dick for a BACKBREAKER! The fans fire up and Yota wants the bell. The ref says yes, ring the bell, and this is on the record! Yota stomps and CLUBS Evil, then whips, but Evil reverses! Yota hits railing, and then Evil whips him into more railing! Evil CHOKES Yota against the railing, Yota fights back, but the ref gets knocked aside! Evil puts Yota in so he and Dick can stomp away!

The fans boo but here comes the rest of the House already! Narita, Yujiro, Kanemaru and Jack all stomp away on Yota, but here come Bushi & Hiromu! It’s a replay of yesterday as LIJ fights off the House, but the numbers are still against them! The ref rushes in to tell everyone to stop! Evil shoves the ref out of the ring, Yota fires off on him, but Evil CLAWS Yota’s eyes! The House CHOKES LIJ, but the ref says stop! The bell rings, but what is the decision!? NO CONTEST!?

No Contest

What does this mean!? Someone has to advance, right? The finals aren’t until the 20th, how can there be a no contest? The House started this, where’re the consequences?! Yota gets up but Evil TOSSES him back out! LIJ regroups and Yota asks for a mic. Yota tells Evil that he’s sick and tired of this! They ARE gonna finish this match! The fans like the sound of that! All the refs come out, including Red Shoes, to discuss how this will be handled. For starters, they tell all the extras to get outta here! LIJ is cool with that, and Hiromu tells the House to come along. Evil says fine, and Jack, Kanemaru, Narita, Yujiro and even Dick reluctantly exit.

The announcement is officially made, and the bell rings! Yota and Evil rush in, Evil kicks low but Yota CLUBS away on Evil! Evil CLAWS the eyes! Evil kicks, runs, RAMS, but Yota rebounds to run Evil over! Then run and SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Yota fires up and the fans are with him! Evil bails out but the fans rally for Yota. Evil wants Yota to stay back, then he slides in, only to slide right out! Yota runs out after Evil, but Evil kicks him! Evil RAMS Yota into the timekeeper! Abe-san and his table go flying! Evil gets the mic to tell Yota that this is what he gets! The fans boo but Evil tells them off, too! Evil stomps Yota then soaks up the heat.

Evil unties the blue buckle pad himself, then waits in the ring. The ref checks Yota and the fans rally up again. The Young Lions help Abe-san while Yota drags himself up. Yota slides in, the fans cheer, but Evil pulls on Yota’s hair! Evil wrenches the hair, then wrenches it again! And again! Evil CLUBS the hair! The ref reprimands but Evil just dusts off his hands. Evil covers, but the ref refuses to count! Evil is furious but he’s the one up to no good! The ref still says no, so Evil stands on Yota’s head. The fans rally up, Yota rises, and he grins as he winds up to ROCK Evil with a forearm! And ROCK him with another!

Yota ROCKS Evil again, but Evil whips him into the bare buckles! Yota falls and the ref reprimands about the missing buckle pad. Evil stomps Yota, covers, TWO! The fans cheer but Evil is annoyed. Evil scuffs Yota, taunts him, and drags him up. Evil CHOPS, Yota drops to his knees, but Evil stands him back up. Evil CHOPS again and Yota grits his teeth as he drops to his knees! Evil stands Yota up again, to fake the chop to CLAW the eyes! The ref reprimands, Evil lets off, and then Evil stands on Yota in a corner. The ref counts, Evil lets go of the ropes but that’s not the problem! Evil steps away, drags Yota up but claims he’s dead weight.

The ref checks, Evil stands Yota up and wrenches an arm. Evil whips Yota into a corner, runs in, but into a BOOT! Evil runs in again, blocks the boot, but Yota brings Evil in for the STOMP! The fans fire up while Yota rests on the mat. The fans rally up and Yota rises again. Evil’s in the corner, runs out, but into the BACKBREAKER! COMPLETE SHOT! STOMP! The fans fire up again as Yota stands back up. Yota runs, to CURB STOMP!! Yota roars and the fans fire up again! Evil flounders while Yota aims. Yota runs in, but the ref is used as a shield! Evil kicks Yota low, then uses the ref in MAGIC KILLER!

All three men are down while the fans rally up again. Evil stands, he brings Yota up, and the ref also rises. Evil whips Yota into the bare buckles, then clotheslines him in! Then FISHERMAN BUSTER! Cover, but Evil lets off?! Evil wants to torture Yota but it’s hard to say if Yota is still even in this. Yota opens his eyes, rises up, but Evil fireman’s carries! DARKNESS FALLS! Cover, TWO!! Yota survives, the fans fire up, but Evil is furious! Evil slashes his throat and vows to end this now! Evil drags Yota up, spins him around, but Yota fights the STO with elbows! Evil kicks low, whips again, but Yota stops from hitting buckles!

Evil runs in, Yota dodges and Evil hits the buckles! SUPERKICK!! Both men are down again and the fans fire back up! We’re only ten minutes into this new match but this is on top of the madness from earlier. Evil drags Yota up, but Yota ROCKS Evil! Evil fights Yota’s fireman’s carry and CLUBS him, but both men wobble. Evil LARIATS, but Yota stays up! The fans fire up but Evil swings to LARIAT again! Yota drops to a knee, but he grins through the pain! Evil says alright, and he throws off his elbow pad. Evil runs to LARIAT! Yota grits his teeth to stay up! V-TRIGGER! Yota brings Evil in, suplexes, ORANGE CRUSH! Cover, TWO!!

Evil is still in this but the fans rally behind Yota again. Yota rises, drags Evil up, and then goes to the corner. Yota goes up and up and Evil moves the ref into the way! The ref takes the FLYING CURB STOMP!!! And now the House returns! The fans boo as Kanemaru, Dick, Yujiro, Narita & Jack all stomp away on Yota again! The fans tell them to go home, again, but these guys don’t care! They just put one out on Yota. They whip Yota to a corner, then DIck runs in to ELBOW! Kanemaru ELBOWS! Yujiro BOOTS! Jack SPLASHES! Narita ELBOWS! Then they snapmare and set Yota up! Dick climbs for the DICK CHOP!!

The fans boo but the House applauds their own dirtiness. But here come Bushi & Hiromu again! But they just get mugged again! They set Hiromu up for the DICK CHOP, while Bushi gets a JACK CHOP! The House then slithers away before a replacement ref rushes out here. Evil drags Yota up, winds up and runs, to LARIAT!! Cover, TWO!!! Yota survives and the fans are thunderous! Evil is at a loss for words, but he slashes his throat! He vows to end it for real, and he reels Yota in. EVERYTHING IS- Yota flips through!? And HEADBUTTS!! The fans fire up as Yota reels Evil in for a fireman’s carry! 70 CROSS!! Cover, TWO!!

Evil survives the swinging spinebuster and the House cheers! Yota drags himself to a corner, drags himself up with the ropes, and roars as he takes aim! Evil rises, but Yujiro distracts! Dick runs in, but gets a V-TRIGGER! The ref sees Dick, but misses the LOW BLOW! Then Evil RAMS Yota into the ref! That’s the second ref this match! Narita gets his push-up bar! The others set Yota up, but here comes SHINGO TAKAGI! The Rampaging Dragon has seen enough, and he’s still pissed from yesterday as it is! He dodges Narita to PUMPING BOMBER! Kanemaru & Yujiro kick Takagi, double whip, but he DOUBLE PUMPING BOMBERS!!

Jack gets in, but he gets ELBOW, JAB and YUKON LARIAT! Evil runs up but Takagi SWATS Evil’s lariat to JAB! Then feed to Hiromu’s SUPERKICK! Hiromu & Takagi set Evil up for Bushi’s BLACK MIST!! Evil can’t see, the PUMPING BOMBER turns him inside-out!! The fans are thunderous as LIJ helps Yota up! Red Shoes hurries out here, and Yota aims at Evil! GENE BLASTER!!! Cover, Yota wins!!!

Winner: Yota Tsuji, by pinfall (advances to the finals)

The House of Torture ran out of tricks, and now there is light at the end of the tournament! Will Yota do LIJ proud and bring home the Cup?

 

2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: SANADA VS Hirooki Goto!

One down, one to go. Yota Tsuji has made it through, now we see who joins him in the finals! Will the Cold Skull or Fierce Warrior be the one that steps closer to former glory?

The bell rings and the fans duel between “GO-TO-O!” and “SA-NA-DA!” Red Shoes measures the levels, and it seems to slightly favor Goto. Goto and Sanada circle, tie up, and are in a deadlock. Goto gets some leverage to put Sanada against ropes, but he lets off slowly. Goto pats Sanada on the shoulders and the fans cheer. The two reset, circle again, and tie up again. It’s another deadlock, but again Goto finds a way to put Sanada on ropes. Sanada turns things around, lets off slowly, and also pats Goto on the shoulders. The fans applaud and the two reset again. They feel things out, knuckle lock, then move to a clinch.

They fight for control, Sanada starts pushing Goto towards a corner but Goto slips away. They feel things out, knuckle lock again, then break. They tie up collar ‘n’ elbow, Goto waistlocks, but Sanada wrenches to wristlock. Goto rolls, wrenches, wristlocks, but Sanada spins, wrenches, only for Goto to roll! Goto gets a leg to trip Sanada up, and he has a toehold. Sanada fights back with a chinlock but Goto pulls on the leg. Sanada uses his free leg to hook Goto into an ARMBAR, but Goto clasps hands! Goto moves around, pops free, then headlocks. Sanada fights up, Goto grinds the headlock, but Sanada throws body shots.

Sanada powers up and out, but Goto runs him over! The fans rally as things speed up, and Goto counters hip toss with hip toss! Goto runs and he clotheslines Sanada up and out! The fans fire up and Goto slides out after Sanada. Goto stomps Sanada, drags him up, then CLUBS him on the neck! Sanada staggers, Goto CHOPS him, then kicks him, then CLUBS him! Goto whips but Sanada stops himself from hitting railing! Goto runs in but Sanada drop toeholds him into the railing! Goto goes down in a heap, but Sanada opens the gate. Sanada brings Goto through, then to the crowd! PILEDRIVER to the bare floor!

The fans are stunned but Red Shoes reprimands. Sanada leaves Goto behind and slides into the ring. The fans rally for Goto as the ring count begins. Goto crawls at 5 of 20, finds his way to ringside at 10, but still hobbles and crawls. He stands at 17 to slide in! The fans cheer, but Sanada stomps Goto. Sanada drags Goto up, CLUBS him on the neck, then brings him back up to CLUB him again. Goto CHOPS! And CHOPS! Sanada eggs Goto on so Goto CHOPS again! Goto whips, Sanada reverses to RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Cover, TWO! Sanada keeps cool and sits Goto up into a chinlock. Goto endures and the fans rally again.

Goto kicks forward, reaches out, but Sanada cranks on the hold! Goto keeps fighting, and has the ROPEBREAK! Sanada lets go cleanly, but then he stomps Goto while he’s down. Sanada then stands Goto up to CLUB him on the neck. Goto CHOPS in return! And CHOPS, and CHOPS, and has Sanada in a corner! Goto CHOPS again, then whips corner to corner. Goto runs in, but Sanada BOOTS first! Sanada runs, Goto follows, and Goto LARIATS Sanada down! The fans fire up and Goto rises, clutching his neck. Goto stands Sanada up to fire off forearms, then he whips corner to corner. Goto runs in, MURAMASA!

Sanada wobbles, into the SAIDO! Cover, TWO! The fans fire up while Goto grits his teeth. Goto drags Sanada up, fireman’s carries, but Sanada fights free! Sanada waistlocks, Goto throws elbows, then runs. Sanada hurdles, hurdles, and DROPKICKS! Goto tumbles out of the ring, Sanada PLANCHAS him down! The fans fire up and Sanada encourages them to get louder. The fans get louder and Sanada appreciates it. Sanada then goes back for Goto, brings him up and puts him in the ring. Sanada fireman’s carries but Goto throws elbows! Sanada turns around into Goto’s fireman’s carry, but then slips out into the dragon sleeper!

But Goto arm-drags free! Sanada kicks low, runs, but Goto follows! Sanada dodges this time, runs again, but Goto still follows! Sanada sidesteps this time, but Goto holds ropes to avoid the hurdle! Goto runs in, but Sanada fireman’s carries! T K O! Cover, TWO! Goto is still in this and the fans rally up! Sanada goes up the corner, ROUNDING BODY- NO, Sanada has to land out as Goto moves! Sanada runs in, but into the fireman’s carry! USHIGOROSHI! Both men are down and the fans fire up again! They cheer on “GO-TO-O!” but the “SA-NA-DA!” chants are still there. Red Shoes checks them both, and both men slowly rise.

The two crawl towards each other, and Goto fires a forearm! Sanada shakes his head, eggs Goto on, so Goto throws another! Goto eggs Sanada on, so Sanada fires a forearm! Goto fires a forearm back, and the two stand. Sanada UPPERCUTS! Goto comes back to forearm! Sanada UPPERCUTS again, and Goto drops back to a knee! The fans rally, Goto stands again, and he forearms! UPPERCUT, forearm, repeat! Goto growls, fires a flurry of forearms, and he ROCKS Sanada! Sanada drops to his hand and knees but Goto powers up! Goto KICKS but Sanada blocks! Goto fires more forearms, then waistlocks, but Sandaa fights free!

Sanada runs, but Goto fireman’s carries! And he throws Sanada into the dragon sleeper! But Sanada turns around and suplexes, for MAGIC SCREW! Both men are down again and the fans fire back up! Sanada roars as he rises up, and he aims from a corner. Sanada wants Goto to get up, and Goto sits up, into the SHINING WIZARD! Sanada then dragon sleepers, for the SKULL END!! Goto endures, flails, reaches out, but he’s caught in the body scissors! Goto fights around but he’s fading! The fans rally, Goto’s hand drops! Sanada lets him go to then climb! ROUNDING BODY PRESS! Cover, TWO!!

The fans fire up as Goto survives but Sanada storms around. Sanada drags Goto up, reels him in and clinches, but Goto slips free to shove Sanada away! Sanada forearms, ROLLING- HEADBUTT from Goto! The fans fire up and duel, and Goto drags Sanada up. But Sanada breaks free! Goto HEADBUTTS again! Sanada falls back down and Goto steadies himself. Goto roars, the fans are with him, and Goto sits Sanada up. Goto runs to PENALTY KICK! Shoutout to Shibata and the fans fire up more! Sanada grits his teeth as he sits back up but Goto takes aim! BUZZSAW! And then he hauls Sanada up to dragon sleeper! G T- BACKSLIDE COUNTER! TWO!!!

Sanada and Goto hurry up, Sanada dodges to O’Conner BRIDGE!! TWO?!!? Goto escapes and shocks everyone! Sanada resets, runs in, SHINING WIZARD!! The fans are thunderous as Sanada roars and drags Goto back up! Clinch and DEAD- NO, Goto slips around to ripcord and fireman’s carry! G T W!! Cover, TWO?!?!? Sanada survives but Goto is all fired up! The fans are thunderous as Goto dragon sleepers for G T R!!! Cover, GOTO WINS!!!

Winner: Hirooki Goto, by pinfall (advances to the finals)

Don’t call it a comeback, Goto’s been here for years! Sanada’s hopes of being IWGP World Heavyweight Champion again have been delayed, how long must he wait for another chance?

As for Goto, he’s going back to the New Japan Cup Finals for the first time since 2016, and his seventh overall! But before he can get the mic to speak, Yota makes his way back out here. Yota steps into the ring and he gets the mic first. Yota tells Goto, “In order to open the door to a new era, we must do this.” The fans applaud that, and Yota continues by asking Goto, “Are you ready?!” Yota drops the mic at Goto’s feet, and Goto stands up to speak. “I also have something I want to show you. As a three-time New Japan Cup Champion, I will show you my strength.” The fans like the sound of that!

The Fierce Warrior stares down with Gene Blast, a true generational showdown on the horizon! Will Goto return not juts to former glory, but finally ascend to top of NJPW? Or will Yota make it LIJ VS LIJ for the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship?


My Thoughts:

A great semifinal round for this tournament, with quite a surprising main event. Sanada VS Goto was great stuff, and while I felt Sanada wasn’t winning the Cup, I didn’t think he’d be out this round. Yota VS Evil was rather creatively put together, too. I did not think the House would get so involved that at first it was a No Contest but then they restart under a ringside ban. Takagi making sure Yota won was good stuff, too, maybe we can get Takagi VS Evil for the NEVER Openweight Championship if they’re not gonna circle back to more Shota Umino VS House of Torture stuff.

Goto VS Yota is going to be great stuff, and Goto is clearly a top utility guy. He’s had so many New Japan Cup finals appearances, certainly among the most ever, but I don’t think he gets a fourth Cup win against Yota, one of the “new era Musketeers” that NJPW clearly loves. Yota VS Naito is definitely the title match for Sakura Genesis.

My Score: 8.9/10


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