Rob digs into the WWE RAW Women’s Championship situation, and it’s… well it’s kinda complicated!
Five weeks out from WrestleMania we have a tale of two women’s divisions. On SmackDown the title match is set and it’s just a matter of what hijinks will ensue between Sasha Banks and Bianca Belair on the way there. On the Raw side, well………it’s complicated. Champion Asuka has been out for the past couple of weeks after an injury and the opponent she was supposed to face at the Elimination Chamber, Lacey Evans is out for a while for maternity leave.
That’s left the entire division up in the air, and from the looks of things we could be headed to a familiar matchup between Asuka and longtime nemesis but current tag team partner Charlotte Flair. Which of course is starting to bring up the usual chatter from some sections of the fanbase regarding the Queen. Some names have been thrown around as alternatives but we don’t have any reason to believe yet that anything but the safe route is going to be taken. Which begs a few questions. One, is that the right way to go this year? And if not, then what is?
If we’re going to stick to kayfabe (which we should seeing as how it’s a TV show with fictional characters and all) then a 12 time singles champion still in her prime should be a favorite to win her way to a title match over the next five weeks, particularly against a field of opponents that have caused her very little trouble in the past. If you profess to desire logic and continuity in your wrestling storytelling then that should be pretty freaking obvious.
But that’s not really the issue here, is it?
After all I don’t think there is a big constituency for Mandy Rose, Dana Brooke or Peyton Royce (more on her later) to win their way to a title match at WrestleMania. I don’t think any of you guys or gals want to see Lana in that spot either. Any of those four ladies would get squashed in five minutes and we’d be wondering why they even booked the match in the first place. Y’all aren’t mad about Charlotte Flair the character winning her way to a title match so much as y’all don’t want Ashley Fleihr to get chosen over her co-workers to perform in a big spot again. But here’s the thing – if you’ve been going on saying that Asuka deserves better out of her title reign and that she deserves a WrestleMania worthy of her abilities then if you’re not going to go with Charlotte then there’s one other option on the Raw roster right now:
Naomi. That’s it. Shayna Baszler and Nia Jax are likely penciled in for a Tag Team Title defense on the show. In kayfabe (which again is what we should be relying on here as far as what happens on camera) Naomi is a former two time Smackdown Women’s Champion, former FCW Women’s champion, and WrestleMania Women’s Battle Royal Winner. Last year she pinned the then-Smackdown Women’s Champion Bayley, and this year she pinned Asuka in a tag team match.
Outside of kayfabe Trinty Fatu has shown that she can be relied on to perform big in big spots whether it’s in the last two Royal Rumble matches, Money in the Bank matches, or the rare time she’s gotten a singles match on a pay per view. And if you want to play the you deserve it card she repeatedly been tasked with trying to drag decent matches out of people who clearly aren’t as good or as compelling of performers as her. If you say no to Charlotte and are looking at the rest of the active Raw roster in the time frame that they have to set up and build to a WrestleMania match then you gotta pick her.
But what about Rhea Ripley?
What about her? She’s debuting on Raw soon, and she’s poised to do some big things afterwards. She will inevitably challenge for and defend the Raw title at WrestleMania in the future. But if you’re going to sit here and say Charlotte would be leapfrogging over people if she gets the match then what the hell would Ripley be doing? Do you want her to win the title in that match, too? Just how would that fit with your wanting Asuka to be “treated better” ? And unless you’re expecting her to have a forever title reign then how are you going to take it when she loses that title later year, quite possibly to the same woman you don’t want in the match now?
Have you thought all that through, or are you so fixated on not wanting one person to get the match that you’re willing to throw all logic and consistency out the window? Also, looking at the other side of the street there’s a historic match for the Smackdown Title on deck between Sasha Banks and Bianca Belair; the significance of that match renders the Raw Title match second fiddle regardless so do you really want to spend your big splash for Ripley on a match that’s going to get overshadowed anyway? Look if you just want Ripley to get the match then say so. But don’t try to spin it like that’s some kind of justice for those who haven’t gotten as many title matches as Charlotte has, because it just isn’t.
And speaking of which…Peyton Royce
I can’t speak on all this without mentioning the Peyton Royce segment on Raw Talk this week, where she went on about just that. That segment is coming off the heels of her mother in real life responding to a tweet from WWE about Charlotte setting her sights on the Raw Title by saying that she thinks it’s time for someone else to get a chance (that someone else obviously being her daughter, let’s be real here), so we have a case of art imitating life in wrestling.
And I gotta say, that kind of thing needs to stop.
The Man, or in this case the McMahon (sorry, I had to) is not holding down everyone who isn’t on TV regularly or not getting title shots or whatever. Sooner or later there needs to be a conversation inside the business that there are levels or tiers or whatever on every company’s roster and that the people who get to stay in the top ones are the people who have proven themselves reliable in those spots. And to date, she has not.
Over the past year she’s been in the ring with everyone from Bianca to Charlotte to Asuka to Sasha Banks and Bayley to Nikki Cross to her own former partner Billie Kay and you’d be hard pressed to remember anything she did in any of those matches to stand out or at least get recognized alongside her opponent. Now there are people who work with her that have vouched for her in ring abilities, and I will not debate any of them on that. But as a viewer I have yet to see one match or segment of hers that made me want to see more.
And before you blame the writers/bookers for that, look at Lana. Lana used to be someone I changed the channel or hit the mute button on when she came on TV. But she took those table bumps for nine weeks and while people were on twitter complaining about it those spots built up sympathy for her as a character and made me want to see how she would get some kind of payback. And over on Smackdown the Riott Squad gets roughly the same amount of time as Peyton and yet manages to do something with it to make you want more of them.
I’ll leave you with this. If the main reason you think someone should get a bigger push is because they haven’t gotten one yet, or haven’t gotten one in a while, then that’s not gonna cut it. At the end of the day they have to give you a reason to support them that is based on who they are, and not on who they aren’t or what they haven’t gotten or because the internet says they’re really good. If they’ve been on TV, worked with everyone who matters, even held a title and you still can’t remember anything they did then that speaks for itself.
The men and women who have gotten pushed to the top usually don’t need more than their entrance and a minute or two of match highlights to show why they’re where they are and the ones who actually should get moved up can do the same. And cutting the same ‘the boss isn’t giving me a proper opportunity’ promo isn’t enough either whether it’s on Raw Talk, Dynamite, or any other company’s show. God knows that it is used entirely too much in every corner of the business now. It worked for Daniel Bryan and Becky Lynch because when time came to show us who they were, they delivered because they were already that good at performing. But it just doesn’t work for everyone, because everyone isn’t that good a performer to get that over. If you can’t do what they did then don’t expect the same results. Simply not being pushed as far as others isn’t enough.
At the end of the day the question isn’t “should you be pushed more?”, it’s “why should you be pushed more?” What’s the answer? If all you got is “time for someone else besides ___?” then you’ve got nothing.
Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (4/12/21)
The Raw After WrestleMania!
WrestleMania 37 is over, but how does Raw handle the aftermath?
Raw makes land after WrestleMania’s high seas adventure, and while we’re STILL in the All Might Era, we’ve also entered a new NIGHTMARE!
- Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Matt Riddle; Lashley wins.
- Cedric Alexander & Shelton Benjamin VS The Viking Raiders; The Viking Raiders win.
- Raw Women’s Championship: Rhea Ripley VS Asuka; Asuka wins by disqualification, Rhea retains the title.
- 2v1 Handicap: The Miz & John Morrison w/ Maryse VS Damian Priest; win(s).
PLAY BY PLAY
Bobby Lashley and MVP arrive in the NEW ThunderDome, the University of South Florida’s Yuengling Center.
The staff and superstars all applaud, and some even ask for autographs. Matt Riddle gives Lashley congrats, but the real excitement doesn’t start until the next day! And so even though Riddle is busted up, he wants to challenge Lashley! Wait, he got whooped by Sheamus but wants to step to Riddle? He must be out of his mind! Well, maybe. Riddle did wear a tinfoil hat to school because he thought aliens abducted him and were sending him messages, but then Riddle just realized his braces were picking up radio waves.
Lashley stops Riddle there and says he just went to war with Drew McIntyre at WrestleMania. He will be damned if he faced someone lesser. He is just here to celebrate and address the fans, that is all! Well okay. But wasn’t it a few weeks ago that Lashley said anyone could have a chance at the championship? And then it was March 8th, 2021, “Everybody in the locker room knows that the same thing that happened to The Miz will happen to them if they step into the ring with me!” And then, Riddle quotes Lashley again, “I worked too long and too hard to become WWE Champion!” Lashley SMACKS Riddle of his own scooter!
Lashley tells Riddle he is a loser, and Lashley is a winner. Tonight, he’ll show Riddle the difference. So is that a yes to the match? Will the Bro come to regret getting on the Rocky Mountain Machine’s bad side?
Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Matt Riddle!
Corey Graves and Adnan Virk both join Raw’s commentary team now, and this is quite the moment to start with! Because bro, Riddle might be taking on more than he can handle after he took on and lost to the Fella over the WWE US Championship. And then Lashley CLOBBERS Riddle as he scooters to ringside! Will Riddle even stand a chance in this fight?!
Lashley throws Riddle around ringside, then RAMS him into barriers! And again! And again! The ref reprimands but Lashley drags Riddle up to whip him all the way into more barriers! This isn’t a match yet, Lashley is just hurting Riddle, as he fireman’s carries and POSTS him! Lashley glares at Riddle as he stalks up behind him. Riddle manages to get up but Lashley RAMS him into barriers! Lashley finally puts Riddle in the ring, Riddle flounders to a corner, and he glares up at Lashley. The bell rings, this is finally a match, and Lashley fires off haymakers! Lashley bumps Riddle off buckles, and again! Lashley gets in Riddle’s face before he bumps him off buckles again!
Riddle sputters, Lashley drags Riddle up and RAMS into him over and over! The ref counts, Lashley lets off and whips Riddle corner to corner. Lashley runs in, and RAMS into Riddle again! MVP likes what he sees as Lashley hits a NECKBREAKER! Riddle sits up in a daze but Lashley hauls him up for a suplex! Lashley holds Riddle up, with one arm! And then after a count of 10, he SLAMS Riddle down! MVP says Lashley can do whatever he wants! Lashley goes outside and gets Riddle’s scooter! Lashley TOSSES it up the ramp! Lashley goes back to the ring, but Riddle fires off body shots! Riddle forearms, but Lashley scoops and SLAMS him down!
Lashley throws Riddle out, goes out after him, and military presses Riddle up to TOSS over the barriers!! Lashley leaves Riddle for dead out there as Raw goes to break!
Raw returns and Riddle fights back but Lashley stomps him down! Lashley looms over Riddle, and knocks him back down! Riddle writhes but Lashley shows no mercy. Lashley clamps onto Riddle with a knuckle digging into Riddle’s jaw! Riddle fights up, fights free, runs but Lashley follows to get Riddle for a flurry of knees! Buckle shot to a COMPLETE SHOT! Cover, TWO!! Riddle still lives but Lashley rains down rights on him! Lashley digs his knuckles in again but Riddle gets a ropebreak with a foot. Lashley lets off, he puts Riddle on ropes and chokes him! Lashley lets off at the ref’s count, but comes back with crossface forearms!
Riddle flounders as Lashley lets off again, and Lashley stomps him down! Lashley stands on Riddle’s chest but the ref counts. Lashley lets off, to stand on Riddle’s head! MVP says Lashley can do what he wants as Lashley whips and CLOBBERS Riddle! Lashley gets Riddle up to snap suplex and then dig his knuckles in again! The ref counts, Lashley lets off, and then he slams Riddle’s arm into the mat! And the other arm! Then he stomps Riddle’s hand! Lashley sits Riddle up, neck wrenches, but Riddle fights up to throw hands back! Riddle backs Lashley down but Lashley CLOBBERS him again! Lashley looms over Riddle again, brings him up and whips, but Riddle blocks!
Lashley tries again, but Riddle escapes the spinebuster! Riddle fires off hands, kicks, but gets caught! Riddle still gets around, ripcord, FINAL FLASH! Riddle gets Lashley in a drop zone and goes up top! FLOATING BRO- NO! Lashley catches him to a HURT LOCK!! Lashley thrashes Riddle, Riddle taps, Lashley wins!
Winner: Bobby Lashley, by submission
The All Mighty couldn’t be stopped, even just a few days out from having faced the Scottish Warrior! If Lashley can keep putting on the hurt, will anyone ever stop him?
Backstage interview with Rhea Ripley.
The NEW Raw Women’s Champion is already defending her title! But it’s about confidence in herself. It’s what led her to challenge Asuka in the first place, and what allowed her to beat one of the best ever to become champion. What the WWE Universe witnessed last night was the “brutal new order” of the Women’s Division. And in this WrestleMania rematch, she will prove again that she IS ready for Asuka! Will the Empress of Tomorrow redeem herself for what happened yesterday?
Cedric Alexander & Shelton Benjamin VS The Viking Raiders!
#PRIMED Alexander & The Gold Standard are about to run into a raid! Erik & Ivar are back, will they ransack the Raw Tag Team Division once again?
The teams sort out, Alexander asks Ivar, “How’s the neck?” They tie up, throw hands, and Ivar throws Cedric to throw hands back! The ref counts, Ivar lets off and tags in Erik. They whip Alexander, scoop and SLAM, to then have Erik scoop slam SENTON Ivar onto Alexander! Alexander hurries away, tags in Benjamin, and Benjamin sucker punches Ivar! Alexander chop blocks Erik and Benjamin KNEES him down! Cover, TWO! Erik is still in this but Benjamin is after him with a scoop and SLAM! And another scoop SLAM! Benjamin drags Erik up, Erik shoves him away but Benjamin stomps Erik back down.
Benjamin stays between the Vikings, then drags Erik up in a facelock for some knees. Benjamin CLUBS Erik down, then snap suplexes! Cover, TWO! Benjamin tags Alexander, they keep Erik down with elbow drops! Alexander fires off body shots, rams into Erik, then lets off. Alexander digs his forearms into Erik and talks trash, then KNEES low! Alexander brings Erik out but Erik ROCKS him with a right! Alexander grabs at Erik but Erik puts him in a corner. Alexander clubs free, ROCKS Erik back, then talks more trash. Alexander clubs Erik down, drags him back up, and whips him but Erik gets around to clinch! Alexander fights free with elbow after elbow!
Alexander brings Erik up, tags Benjamin, and they hand off for Benjamin to back suplex. Erik fights free, ROCKS Alexander, ROCKS Benjamin, but Alexander KNEES Erik! OLYMPIC SLAM from Benjamin! Cover, TWO!! Erik survives but Benjamin tags Alexander. Alexander elbows Erik on the back, brings him back up, and whips, only for Erik to reverse! Ace Ten Mao!! Both men are down, crawl for their corners, hot tags to Benjamin and Ivar! The War Beard and Gold Standard fire off hands! Ivar gets the edge, whips and runs Benjamin over and over! Whip and scoop for a SIDEWALK SLAM! BIG VIKING SPLASH!
Ivar fires up and so do the fans on their ThunderDome screens, but Benjamin knees back. Benjamin whips but runs into the SEATED SENTON! Ivar fires up even more and he drags Benjamin up. Benjamin powers Ivar to the corner, tags Alexander and they mug Ivar. They double whip, but Ivar cartwheels around to DOUBLE LARIAT! Tag to Erik, Ivar CLOBBERS Benjamin! Erik uses Ivar to HIP ATTACK Benjamin! Ivar gets Alexander, feeds him to Erik, THOR’S HAMMER!! Cover, the Viking Raiders win!
Winners: The Viking Raiders, by pinfall
The #VikingExperience is back! Will the warpath head for gold once again?
Backstage interview with Asuka.
How is she approaching this rematch? “Last night, Rhea Ripley brought the fight. But now, it’s MY turn!” Asuka says in Japanese and then in English that losing was a nightmare. But tonight, she is ready for Rhea, and then once again be Raw Women’s Champion!! The Empress is fired up, will she end Rhea’s reign at just 24 hours?
Charlotte Flair is here!
The Queen returns to Raw and heads to the ring! She gets a mic, soaks in the cheers from the ThunderDome, and says, “So here I am, on the Raw After WrestleMania. And typically, I’d be standing here with my big ol’ Flair smile, but I wasn’t on WrestleMania.” She wasn’t welcomed. She knows what some are thinking: It’s just one Mania! She’s been on five! No, she is a franchise player, a genuine superstar, and what she does is sacred to the Flair family. It wasn’t even her fault! It was all things out of her control and that is unacceptable!
Was it her fault Asuka needed a tag partner? Was it her fault Ric Flair showed up on Legends Night acting like a fool? Was it her fault that Lacey Evans just went and got pregnant before Charlotte could kick her ass? NO! She didn’t try, either! She even challenged Asuka on Raw for the title, but Asuka didn’t respond! Some champion, huh? But that opportunist, Rhea, challenged Asuka and Asuka accepted. Rhea won, a new champion was crowned and a star was born! Out with the old, in with the new! But don’t act like every other woman wasn’t happy that Charlotte wasn’t here! Y’know what everyone thought? “This is MY opportunity to be on WrestleMania!”
But kudos to Rhea! Because now, she’s the biggest snake in the locker room! Even ASUKA manipulated her way to tonight’s rematch! But as they say, “Karma is a BITCH. And I’m that bitch.” Sasha Banks, Bianca Belair, Shayna Baszler, Nia Jax, so on and so forth. No one compares to CHARLOTTE. And what Charlotte realized for the first time in about seven years, after watching Mania at home, “I don’t steal opportunities. I AM the opportunity!” So to all the delusional fans at home that think she steals things for your favorites, NO! She makes those opportunities! This is a NEW Charlotte! She won’t apologize for being that damn good! You will bow down to the THIRTEEN TIME Women’s Champion!!
No more little humble Charlotte. So everyone needs to show their respect to what she has done! She’s dedicated YEARS of her life to this! Tears, blood and sweat. And what has anyone given her in return? Exactly, NOTHING. Enjoy the match that SHE should’ve been in! Mic drop of mic drops right here! Will The Queen go after whoever comes out with the title tonight?
Raw Women’s Championship: Rhea Ripley VS Asuka!
The Nightmare became reality when her brutality was more than ready, ended Asuka’s reign at 330 days, and now she starts her first day as champion! But will the first day be the last when she gives Asuka her WrestleMania rematch already?
Raw returns as Rhea makes her entrance. The introductions are made, the belt is raised and WrestleMania continues on Raw!
Rhea and Asuka circle, approach and tie right up. Rhea puts Asuka in a corner but Asuka turns it around to fire off! The ref counts, Rhea goes after Asuka! Rhea puts Asuka back in a corner, keeps on her with haymakers, but lets off as the ref counts. Asuka drop toeholds but Rhea blocks hitting buckles this time! Rhea drags Asuka up to TOSS her away! Rhea gets Asuka up, Asuka fights but Rhea CLUBS her down! Rhea hauls Asuka up to CLUB her on the back again, and again, then has her at the ropes. Rhea gets Asuka up for a back suplex, but Asuka victory rolls, ONE!! Rhea sits up but into KICKS! Rhea blocks, but Asuka throws her for an ARMBAR!
Rhea scrambles, gets the ropebreak, but Asuka is after her! Rhea hits back, bumps Asuka off buckles, then hoists her up top backwards. Rhea climbs, Asuka elbows away on her, but Rhea gets back to dropkick Asuka down! Asuka tumbles to the floor, the ref reprimands but Rhea smirks as Raw goes to break.
Raw returns again and Rhea has Asuka in a body scissor squeeze. Asuka fights, make sit a cover, ONE as Rhea lets her go! Rhea CLOBBERS Asuka and wags her finger. Rhea drags Asuka up, whips her hard into a corner, but Asuka just gets mad! Rhea drags Asuka up again, bumps her off buckles again and again, then lets off as the ref counts. Rhea stomps Asuka, lets off again, but Asuka elbows her away! Asuka boots, hops up, and leaps for a missile dropkick! Rhea and Asuka are both down and the ThunderDome fans rally on their screens! Rhea sits up, checks her jaw, but Asuka stands, POP-UP KNEE! GERMAN SUPLEX! Rhea is in a corner, Asuka HIP ATTACKS, but no bulldog!
Rhea walks into a ROUNDHOUSE, and a HEEL KICK! SLIDING WIZARD! Cover, TWO!! Rhea survives and Asuka grows desperate. Asuka goes back up top, leaps again, but just misses as Rhea moves! Rhea stomps Asuka, gets the legs, PRISM TRAP!! Rhea pulls on the ankle but Asuka endures and reaches! ROPEBREAK! Asuka holds on but Rhea yanks her for a FACEBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Asuka is still in this and Rhea grows frustrated. Rhea pushes Asuka around, talks trash, but Asuka fires back! Rhea blocks a punch, spins Asuka to cravat and knee away! Rhea snapmares and runs but now she misses! Rhea dodges the Sliding Wizard but Asuka foils the Electric Chair!
Asuka gets up, Rhea tries again, and Rhea gets Asuka up only for Asuka to throw hands! Rhea shifts Asuka to a fireman’s carry, but Asuka makes it a CRUCIFIX DRIVER! Both women are down from that but Asuka crawls to a cover, TWO!! FUJIWARA ARMBAR!! Asuka pulls, Rhea endures, fights and rolls but into an ASUKA LOCK!!! Asuka hasn’t got it completely on as Rhea moves around! Rhea pries at Asuka’s chinbar hold, fights up to her feet, and she RAMS Asuka into a buckle! Rhea is free, and she Electric Chair lifts again, for the FACEBUSTER! Cover, TWO!?! Asuka survives and is driving Rhea mad!
Rhea sees Asuka go to the apron and follows. Rhea wants to return the favor from last night but Asuka shoves her into a POST! And then HIP ATTACKS her into the post! APRON DDT!! The ring count starts, Asuka gets Rhea up, but CHARLOTTE ATTACKS!
Winner: Asuka, by disqualification; Rhea retains the title
Charlotte RAMS Asuka into steps, then into barriers! Charlotte rains down rights on Asuka, then she runs and BOOTS Rhea down!! Charlotte throws forearms on Asuka then EXPLODERS Asuka into the LED! Charlotte BOOTS her into it! Rhea sits up, Charlotte BOOTS her into it, too! Charlotte mocks the Empress and the Nightmare, and says, “I’m baaaack~!” Will she be back on top now that she’s no longer holding back?
The Miz & John Morrison talk backstage.
They’re excited that their social media is blowing up, and “There she is~!” Maryse is here! But why? What? She’s their guest on Miz TV, remember? Oh, duh. Morrison forgot that. The It Couple and Guru of Greatness head out, will they still be must-see even after their Mania loss?
Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler laugh at replays from WrestleMania.
Though they’re still champions, the Tag Team Turmoil match had one obvious mishap: Mandy Rose slipping and falling on her butt. And these two can’t get enough of it! Mandy storms over and asks if they’re done. She gets it, she found a new way to trend. It was a bit embarrassing, but she can laugh at herself. She got up fast, but so funny when you don’t see things coming, right? SLAP! And then the Sexy Muscle Friends RAM Nia into barrels! Will Mandy & Dana be having the last laugh?
Raw returns to Alexa’s Playground.
“WrestleMania was so much fun!” Now, you’re probably wondering why she did what she did. Well maybe this little story will help explain. “Once upon a time, there was a little girl who was lost. Until one day, she was rescued by the darkness.” She of course means herself and how The Fiend snatched her up. “The darkness protected her, nurtured her, and taught her everything it knew. But then the darkness went away.” Alexa wonders if that was when the little girl realized that she didn’t need “the darkness” after all. “How do you think it made her feel when she realized she could do everything on her own?”
Was the darkness helping her? Or was it in her way? Why else would she use what she was taught to try and destroy “the darkness?” Is it true that the female of the species is the deadliest? We may never know. But here’s what we know for sure: that along the way, she unlocked something truly evil. Meet her new friend, Lily! It’s a rather creepy doll… Trust Alexa when she says that their fun is just getting started. The Fiend may be back, but does something far more wicked this way come?
Raw presents an all new Miz TV!
The Miz, Maryse and Morrison head to the ring together, and the Raw After Mania is even more Must-See! But what will they have to say after the break?
Raw returns and the trio are seated in the ring, and Miz welcomes us back to the Most Must-See WWE Talk Show. WrestleMania has come and gone and what a whirlwind! History was made, and yet despite everything that has happened, Miz remains the most talked about entertainer in all of entertainment! And he knows what you’re thinking: Why is Miz’s beautiful wife, Maryse, here? What is the most gorgeous, vivacious and intelligent mother in reality TV doing here? Morrison of course knows but tell us all! Well it’s because tonight, after Raw, the USA Network has the new season of Miz & Mrs! That does make sense!
But sense they’re both here, what about a spin-off? Miz, Mrs & Morrison! #MMM! Catchy, right? No, not really. Their tag line can be, “It’s delicious!” No, no, Morrison, there’s no spin-off! Morrison is even in tonight’s episode, because it’s about the time they made a commercial for Maryse’s Yupon Tea Glow Awakening Moisturizer! What a great episode and an awesome commercial! The greatest commercial of the 21st century! *Stare off into distance* What does Maryse think? It’s… awesome. Right! And this season is so big! And there’s all the buzz from Miz taking Bad Bunny, a megastar in the musical industry, and making him into a true WWE superstar!
Maryse kisses Miz on the cheek and says he is so giving. Never before have we seen someone like Bad Bunny do what Bad Bunny did! And it would’ve never happened without Miz’s tutelage! Let’s look at some highlights from that match at WrestleMania! The Falcon Arrow, the Super Crossbody, and Morrison’s great looking back muscles. History was made, because it takes two to tangle! Without Miz, Bunny would’ve been a flop! But here comes Damian Priest! Priest tells Miz that Bunny doesn’t have Miz to thank. Priest was Bunny’s tag partner and not even Priest is going to take credit for Bunny’s accomplishments. Bunny shocked the world by putting in the work to live the dream.
And if memory serves Priest right, Miz said Bunny didn’t belong. Is Miz saving face? Priest reminds us of the headline: Bad Bunny Beats Miz. Well where’s Priest name in that headline?! Where was he in the highlight reel?! Priest is jealous that he got upstaged by his so-called friend! Meanwhile, Miz has had many Mania moments, including beating Cena in the main event! So Miz can even face Priest tonight! Morrison wanted to do the same thing! They argue over who gets after Priest, but Maryse shouts over them. They can both fight him, wink wink. Oh right… Handicap!
Priest tells them all to stop. They’re just idiots, aren’t they? But fine, he’ll take a handicap match. The headline will then read Priest beats BOTH Miz ‘n’ Morrison! Priest storms down to the ring, but Miz ‘n’ Morrison aren’t dressed to compete! Will the Greatest Tag Team of the 21st Century have to put up or shut up after the break?
Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (4/5/21)
WrestleMania Week Raw isn’t letting up!
The last Raw before WrestleMania is red hot!
WWE begins WrestleMania WEEK with a Raw packed to the brim! Will Drew McIntyre and Bobby Lashley be rolling into their world title clash of titans?
- Xavier Woods w/ Kofi Kingston VS AJ Styles w/ Omos; Woods wins.
- 2v1 Handicap Match: Elias & Jaxson Ryker VS Braun Strowman; Braun wins.
- Asuka & Rhea Ripley VS Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler; Jax & Baszler win.
- Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Cedric Alexander w/ Shelton Benjamin; Lashley wins.
- Matt Riddle VS Mustafa Ali; Riddle wins.
- Drew McIntyre VS King Corbin; McIntyre wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
Drew McIntyre heads to the ring!
Though he faces the Rocky Mountain Machine at WrestleMania, the Scottish Warrior must make it to WrestleMania, and that’ll be hard with Bobby Lashley throwing others at him. SmackDown’s King Corbin thinks he can cash in on Lashley’s golden offer, but that confrontation will be for later tonight. McIntyre has a mic and says this is the final Raw before Mania. Just five days until WrestleMania night one, and he can’t help but think back to last year and how unique it was. Then fast-forward to now, we’re “back in business” and once again McIntyre is fighting to become WWE Champion.
So much is going through his head. Where to begin? With Corbin? Nah. The All Mighty Lashley, this match is happening. Lashley’s tried to take McIntyre out but it is happening! They’re in for the biggest FIGHT of their lives, and McIntyre can hardly wait. Such similar journeys, really, the two of them. Almost 20 years each, so many ups and downs. What is it that makes them different? “Sacrifice.” How much McIntyre is willing to give up. Lashley’s sacrificed a lot, too, traveling up and down the roads, around the world, missing special moments with the family. But when Lashley goes home, he makes up for lost time. McIntyre never had that luxury.
McIntyre left home at age 22 with one purpose in mind: becoming WWE Champion. Times were hard. There were times he wish he could go home. He remembers sitting ringside when his mother was going through chemo therapy. She told him on Skype that this is Drew’s dream, and if he comes home, she’d kick his ass herself. “Keep pushing forward. Keep sacrificing.” McIntyre did, he kept going, he gave everything to this industry! He got fired, kept going, came back, rose up and became WWE Champion! He fell off Cells, ladders, through Extreme Rules, kept sacrificing! How can Lashley beat a man who is willing to sacrifice everything?! He can’t.
McIntyre promises to run through Corbin tonight, then put a boot through Lashley’s eyes, take the title and END the All Mighty Era! But speaking of, here come Bobby Lashley and MVP! “Are you done yet, Drew?” McIntyre just goes on and on about last year. It took Drew 17 years to get here, but it took Lashley 16. There can only be one man on top. McIntyre’s time is over, and now it’s All Mighty Time. And what’s worse is that everyone is so scared of the Scottish Warrior, but Lashley saw something in McIntyre’s eyes. McIntyre is the one afraid! Lashley got McIntyre in the Hurt Lock and felt him shake, shiver, then fade out. And that’ll happen again at Mania!
Such big words! McIntyre wasn’t afraid, he just went out. But if Lashley wants to talk tough, he sent everyone after him, needed help- Lashley doesn’t need help! Did you see what he did to Shelton Benjamin? Now watch what happens to Cedric Alexander. McIntyre says who cares about waiting, let’s just do this now! MVP says that’s not how this works! WrestleMania Saturday is when this happens, and we all know right where McIntyre will be: the center of the ring, with the All Mighty, where McIntyre will lose his dignity, lose consciousness, and ultimately lose the match.
Well putting it that way, then okay, nevermind. McIntyre’s speech was nothing. Maybe he’ll be an Uber driver, an Amazon driver, or just say “Screw that” and run Lashley down! Lashley and McIntyre shout at each other, but MVP shouts over them both. This is a lot of tough talk, considering McIntyre might not even make it to Mania. Because here comes Corbin! The Wolf King tells McIntyre that he agrees with MVP. McIntyre won’t even make it to Mania so why worry about it? Corbin started something last week, and looks to finish it now! There is NO WrestleMania for McIntyre! There is NO WWE World Championship for him! Tonight, Corbin whoops McIntyre’s “punk ass!” The tough talk continues from all over, but who will be standing when it’s all over?
Xavier Woods w/ Kofi Kingston VS AJ Styles w/ Omos!
Don’t worry, this isn’t a replay, it’s a rematch! The Phenomenal One’s colossal tag partner interfered and disqualified the match last week, so now Woods and Styles go another round! Will Styles take care of this himself this week? Or will Woods get that singles series sweep before the Raw Tag Team Championship match at WrestleMania?
Before making their entrance, New Day come across Matt Riddle on his scooter. Riddle wants to say that it was messed up what Omos did last week. His power level must be WAY over 9000. And Riddle is pretty sure he’s never seen someone get as high as Kofi. But bro, Omos’ first match ever is this weekend, but do you think he can get both of them that high? Let’s hope no one gets that high this weekend. But in fact, ya bois the NEW~ DAY~ will get down when they retain their W, W, E, Raw, Tag, Team, Championships~! But Riddle has his own match with Sheamus, after getting through Mustafa Ali tonight. How’s Riddle feeling?
Well, Sheamus is a little more diesel and stinky, so he’ll be good, but Ali is more sticky, so Riddle will have to grind him down before he can break him down, know what he’s saying? But Riddle’s off to get ready. Good luck, Woods! Woods and Kofi both wonder if Riddle was talking about what they think he was talking about. Kofi is pretty sure he’s got a craving for some milk ‘n’ cookies right now… But enough about that, the New Day makes their entrance! Will they and Riddle all smoke the competition tonight?
The bell rings, Woods and Styles circle and tie up, but Styles throat chops! Styles fires off haymakers in a corner, whips Woods to ropes then hits a big hip toss! Omos and Styles are both fired up, and Styles brings Woods up. Woods fires off hands in return, but Styles shoves him then rolls him for the CALF CRUSHER! Woods is caught already, Omos likes what he sees, but Woods reaches! Kofi talks trash on Omos and then throws the mic at him! IT just bounces off!! Omos storms after Kofi into the ring, and Styles lets off of Woods! Styles chases Kofi out, Omos gets on the apron and the ref is distracted. Woods rolls Styles up with a cradle, Woods wins!!
Winner: Xavier Woods, by pinfall
GOTTEE! Turnabout is fair play, and the New Day are fired up! Will they use Omos’ inexperience against him and Styles to stay golden?
A Bugatti rolls up.
It’s Bad Bunny and Damian Priest! They’re rolling into Raw in style, but will they be all business this close to the Most Must-See Showdown at WrestleMania?
BRAAAUN~ is here!
Ahead of his Steel Cage match with the mocking and arrogant Shane McMahon, the Monster Among Men has a cage set up with the ring. Shane miscalculated when he let Braun choose the stipulation, and Braun paces about inside. “My whole life, I’ve had to deal with guys like Shane McMahon.” People would bully Braun for his size when they don’t know who he is, what he’s about. Shane tries to make stupid jokes to get under Braun’s skin, but Shane doesn’t get it. Shane doesn’t know what he’s gotten himself into. Shane can run his mouth all he wants, but when the cage door closes, “the running ends.” He’ll be locked inside with Braun.
And Braun won’t just whoop Shane’s ass for himself, but for everyone who has ever been made fun of for being stupid, and told that they would never make something of themselves! Braun is fighting for himself and for every one of them! There’s no goods, no running, no hiding, and no games! Shane will be inside a steel cage with the Monster Among Men! “At WrestleMania, Shane, at the end of our match on Saturday, while your corpse lays in the middle of this ring after I’ve ping-ponged it around this entire cage, and I rub your face into this metal and give you a taste of the agony that it puts on people’s souls being called ‘stupid,'” the last thing Shane hears won’t be “here comes the money.” It’ll be “here comes the body bag!” At WrestleMania, Shane will #GetTheseHands!
But speaking of, here comes Shane O’Mac, not at all afraid of Braun. So much anger, Braun. What did Shane ever do to him? And when Shane gave Braun the chance to choose the match, it was a test to see how far Braun’s intellect has come since grade school. But honestly, a steel cage at WrestleMania? That choice was not that stupid. On paper, people think this favors Braun. And it would, if Shane was any other man. But he is a McMahon, and he will outwit, outmaneuver and defeat Braun. And then the next morning, when Braun wakes up and look sin the mirror, he’ll say to himself, “Boy, I am stupid…”
2v1 Handicap Match: Elias & Jaxson Ryker w/ Shane McMahon VS Braun Strowman!
The Drifter and his follower appear to fight on Shane’s behalf days before WrestleMania! And perhaps thanks to Shane’s authority, there will be NO tags needed! Will Elias & Ryker soften up Strowman so Shane will have a fighting chance?
Raw returns and the bell rings, Shane watching from a very safe distance. Braun grabs Ryker but Elias attacks, only for Braun to throw him off. Braun ROCKS Elias with an uppercut, then ROCKS Ryker with a haymaker, to then SHOVE Ryker out of the ring! Braun powers Elias to a corner, clubs away on him, then stalks him as he scrambles. Braun scoops but Ryker saves Elias to RAM into him! Elias KNEES Braun in the head! Braun is against the ropes, Ryker CLOBBERS him with double ax handles! Ryker & Elias hit a DOUBLE BACK SUPLEX! Ryker drops ax handles, then he and Elias stomp him together!
Elias gets the legs, drags Braun around, rains down rights, and Ryker climbs up. Ryker leaps for a DIVING HEADBUTT! Elias hurries up top while Ryker holds Braun down! Elias hits the MACHO ELBOW! Double cover, TWO!! Braun launches the two but Shane creeps closer. Ryker and Elias stomp away, hammer Braun down, and Shane takes his jacket off. Elias and Ryker throw hands, but Braun explodes out! Shane hurries away as fast as he can! Braun glares at Shane, then kicks Ryker. Braun sends Elias into Ryker and then SPLASHES them both! Braun CLUBS Elias in the chest, scoops Ryker, and hits the MONSTER SLAM!
Elias staggers into a scoop, and he gets a MONSTER SLAM! Braun covers both men, and wins!
Winner: Braun Strowman, by pinfall
The Monster just mangled two men at once! Shane thinks he still has the upper hand, but will he be broken at the hands of Braun Strowman?
Backstage interview with The Miz & John Morrison.
Kevin Patrick says he wants to ask about their match this Saturday with Bad Bunny, but then notices they have paint cans. Oh, these? Kevin acts like this is odd, but no. They’re artists! You heard of Hey Hey, Hop Hop, but they’re more than just musical artists. Painters such as Van Gogh, Monet, and now Miz ‘n’ Morrison. They have a masterpiece to create, using Bunny’s Bugatti!?! Morrison feels bad, this is a $3.6 MILLION car! But there’s a scratch! This is matching paint! In that case, let’s paint! Wait, that’ snot matching, it’s RED on a WHITE car! They write, “Hey Hey, Hop Hop” and then doodle bunnies and then write their names, too!
Miz does finger-painting like his daughters love! This is so good, right? $3.6 MILLION. Imagine what it’s worth now, right? PRICELESS! But will Bunny & Priest make the Hollywood A-Lister and Guru of Greatness pay for this?
Bad Bunny is furious backstage.
He storms his way back to see the vandalism with his own eyes! Now he’s even angrier! But then Miz BLINDSIDES him! Morrison gets Bunny up and the two mug Bunny, before they throw him into the hood of another car! “This is what happens when you disrespect us! This is what happens when you play with us!” Miz drags Bunny by his hair and says he doesn’t respect Bunny! He’ll run Bunny at Mania just like he ruined the car! WWE officials chase Miz & Morrison off, Priest hurries over and asks what happened. Priest realizes just who it was, Pearce shouts for a medic. They check Bunny, but will Priest make sure Miz & Morrison are the ones who’ll need a hospital?
BREAKING NEWS for WrestleMania!
After the chaotic brawl on last Friday Night SmackDown, there will be two major matches in regards to the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships! First, on Saturday, it will be a Tag Team Turmoil, Naomi & Lana VS Dana Brooke & Mandy VS The Riott Squad VS Natalya & Tamina! The winner goes on to Sunday to face Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler for the titles!
Asuka & Rhea Ripley VS Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler w/ Reginald!
The Empress of Tomorrow and Aussie Nightmare are going to clash at WrestleMania, but it was the challenger who chose to accept the challenge from the WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions! Is Rhea going to use the Irresistible Force and Queen of Spades to soften the Raw Women’s Champion up? Or is she planning on using Nia & Shayna to show Asuka what she’s in for?
Raw shares backstage interview footage from earlier tonight. How does Rhea plan on coexisting with Asuka tonight after flipping a table onto her last week? Rhea says she won’t share a thing about her strategies. But the question is, what about Asuka? And coexisting is a given since they’re up against Nia & Shayna. Asuka will just have to wait to rip into Rhea this Sunday at Mania. With that, Rhea makes her entrance to join Asuka. Will there be coexistence or mutually assured destruction when Raw returns from the break?
Raw returns and the tag team champions make their entrances, Reggie still following Nia. But Shayna tells him to stay way behind them. The teams sort out, Shayna starts against Asuka and the two circle. They tie up, Shayna gets an arm and wrenches but Asuka wrenches through to wristlock then headlock. Shayna endures the grind, powers out, but Asuka rams her with a shoulder! They both stay up so they start shoving. Shayna mocks Asuka for losing a tooth, then runs. Shayna gets around Asuka to shove but Asuka runs Shayna over! Asuka stands on Shayna’s head to pull on the arm, then wrenches the arm to yank!
Asuka reaches over, but Rhea doesn’t want to tag! Shayna ROCKS Asuka, now Rhea tags in. Rhea circles with Shayna, they tie up, and Shayna waistlocks. Rhea switches, Shayna blocks the lift, and then wrenches free. Rhea scoops and TOSSES Shayna away! Nia tags in, and Rhea smiles as she welcomes the challenge. Nia shoves, Rhea fires off haymakers! Rhea goes to scoop but Nia fights that off to scoop instead! Rhea slips off, and tags Asuka in with a pat on the head! Asuka is upset more about the way she tagged, but goes in after Nia! Nia shoves her away, fireman’s carries, but Asuka slips off to back kick! Asuka tilt-o-whirls to the IRON OCTOPUS!
Nia endures, stays up and powers out to run Asuka over! Cover, TWO! Asuka survives but Nia drags her up. Nia shoves Asuka to a corner, runs in and splashes! Asuka flops down, crawls, but Nia looms over her. Nia pushes Asuka, Asuka hits back, but Nia drags Asuka up to whip her to a corner. Asuka dodges and Nia hits buckles, then turns around into the CODE BREAKER! Hot tags to Rhea and Shayna! Rhea dodges Shayna and BOOTS her down! Rhea DECKS Nia, Reggie distracts but gets caught! Shayna CHOP BLOCKS Rhea’s leg out! Shayna tags Nia, and Nia brings Rhea to the announce desk, just to RAM Rhea into apron! Rhea writhes as Raw goes to break!
Raw returns again and Shayna keeps Rhea down by standing on a leg, then she STOMPS the ankle! Rhea writhes and even Asuka feels that pain. Shayna kicks Rhea’s leg, then drags her to a cover, ONE! Nia is annoyed, tags in, and the champions work together to whip, scoop and SLAM Rhea down! Nia runs to drop an elbow! Cover, TWO! Asuka coaches Rhea but Nia drags Rhea over to tag Shayna. They mug Rhea in the corner, Shayna snapmares Rhea to KICK her in the back! Cover, TWO! Shayna drags Rhea by her leg to HEEL HOOK! Rhea endures as Shayna twists the foot around! Rhea fights and kicks with her free leg! Shayna drops an elbow on the bad leg over and over!
Shayna stands on the leg again, drags Rhea away, and tags in Nia. Nia stands on Rhea’s leg now and has a standing toehold! Rhea endures her leg being bent and she swats at Nia, only for Nia to drop a leg on the leg! Nia looms over Rhea as she crawls, then drags her up into a seated cobra clutch! Rhea fights up, fights free with her free arm, and kicks Nia’s legs out to then basement dropkick! Both women crawl, hot tags to Asuka and Shayna! Asuka dropkicks Shayna, dodges Nia and ROUNDHOUSES her! Asuka hits a hip attack on Shayna, then one on Nia! ROUNDHOUSE for Shayna! And a SNAP GERMAN! Asuka runs to SLIDING WIZARD! Cover, TWO!!
Asuka stays fired up and she heads up top! But Rhea SHOVES Asuka down?! Rhea doesn’t care about this tag match anymore, she’s just going to destroy her Mania opponent with an atomic FACEBUSTER! Rhea feeds Asuka to Shayna and Shayna hits a KNEE! Cover, the tag champs win!!
Winners: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler, by pinfall
The Nightmare shouts, “I’m not ready for what?!” Asuka fell for Rhea’s trap, but will she get even at WrestleMania? Or will the Riptide dethrone the Empress on the Grandest Stage of Them All?
Cedric Alexander finds MVP backstage.
MVP asks what he’s doing, and it better not be to beg to get back in. Alexander grabs MVP by his collar, and Benjamin walks over to say he better listen. Alexander tells MVP that his greed will cost him. Last week, MVP had the audacity to tell these two they were an embarrassment! That they’re incompetent! MVP is a parasite who needed the Hurt Business to hold him up now that he’s a “crippled, past-up has-been.” Alexander may not win tonight, but he’ll give Lashley a scar he’ll remember him by. And Alexander will be watching as McIntyre defeats Lashley and exposes MVP for the fraud he is. Alexander lets MVP go, and Benjamin straightens his suit for him. Benjamin looks at the THB necklace they got MVP, and tells him to keep his “crippled ass” out of the ring.
Sarah comes by to ask if MVP is at all concerned about Lashley’s match coming up tonight. No, MVP is never concerned for Lashley. MVP is disappointed in “the arrogant, ungrateful attitude” that Alexander & Benjamin are showing. Let’s not forget that it’s because of MVP that they became tag team champions, have the fancy suits and are even relevant again! Before MVP, Alexander had never been to a five-star steakhouse. Lashley walks over and asks what happened, but MVP say sit’s fine. Lashley vows to break Alexander in half! Will there be anything left of #PRIMED after tonight?
Backstage interview with Nia, Shayna & Reggie.
Congrats on tonight’s win, but are they confident about their title defense at WrestleMania against the Tag Team Turmoil winner? Does Sarah need a drink of water after the longest question ever? Of COURSE these two are confident! So dumb! But The Ravishing Glow, Lana & Naomi walk over and say they can think of a few reasons why the champs should be worried. Oh, right, because these two are really scary. But then Dana & Mandy walk over and ask, “What about us?” What about you? But then SmackDown’s Tamina & Natty storm in! They don’t even go here! Why- But now the Riott Squad gets in on this! Wait, wait, Billie Kay wants in. Does she even have a partner? Carmella is reviewing her resumé so…
NO! All of you have a match on Saturday. The winner faces the champs on Sunday. They don’t have time for this. They head out to let their contenders argue. Who rises up to challenge the Irresistible Force & Queen of Spades on the Grandest Stage of Them All?
Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Cedric Alexander w/ Shelton Benjamin!
We just saw Alexander get in the face of Montel Vontavius Porter and Lashley not take that lightly. Will the Rocky Mountain Machine pulverize PRIMED as an example to McIntyre?
Raw returns again and the former Hurt Business members are already ringside. MVP is on commentary, Benjamin is in Alexander’s corner, but then he sneaks in to attack Lashley! Benjamin and Alexander mug Lashley 2v1 and the match isn’t even underway! MVP doesn’t mind, he just talks old times with Samoa Joe. Lashley fights back but the 2v1 continues! Lashley shoves Benjamin away, DECKS Alexander and then throws knees on Benjamin! Lashley throws the Gold Standard out and MVP says that’s why he wasn’t worried. The bell rings and now Alexander is 1v1 with Lashley. Alexander throws hands but Lashley DECKS him, then scoop SLAMS him!
Lashley talks trash, bumps Alexander off buckles and RAMS into him over an dover! The ref counts, Lashley brings Alexander out for a NECKBREAKER! Lashley glares at Benjamin on the outside before he drags Alexander up to TOSS him! Lashley paces, drags Alexander up and TOSSES him the other way! Lashley drags Alexander up throws him out and Benjamin checks on him. The ref starts a ring count, Lashley paces but Benjamin gets Alexander up. The count is 6 of 10, Alexander hobbles but Lashley pursues. Alexander gets in and jumps on Lashley as he returns, only for Lashley to TOSS him again! Alexander sputters to a corner, Lashley runs in and RAMS into him!
Lashley drags Alexander around, suplexes and holds him up to SLAM him down! Lashley still glares at Benjamin, then tells MVP this is it. Alexander gets to the apron but Lashley hauls him up to ROCK him! Lashley drags Alexander in just to throw him back out! Then Lashley goes out and grins as he drags Alexander back up. Lashley fireman’s carries Alexander to POST him!! Alexander is down again and Lashley roars as Raw goes to break!
Raw returns again, and Lashley leans on Alexander in a neck wrench. Alexander throws hands from below but Lashley just digs his knuckles into Alexander’s head! Alexander fights up but Lashley ROCKS him with a right! Alexander back kicks then front kicks then dropkicks! Lashley stays up and gets Alexander for a COMPLETE SHOT! Lashley grows annoyed with Alexander and drags him up to throw him out again! Lashley goes back out, glares at Benjamin, then drags Alexander up to fireman’s carry again. But Benjamin saves Alexander from another post shot! Lashley storms after Benjamin but Alexander sends Lashley into the steps!
Alexander gets in the ring, builds speed and DIVES! Direct hit and Lashley hits barriers! Alexander keeps going to DIVE again! Another hit and another collision with barriers! Lashley shoves Alexander into the ring but Alexander handsprings for the NEURALIZER! Alexander runs in but is put on the apron, but he ENZIGURIS back! Alexander climbs, leaps, missile dropkick! Cover, ONE?!! Alexander is shocked but MVP says he’s still confident in Lashley. Alexander clubs away on Lashley’s back, but Lashley shoves him away. Alexander ends up on the apron, he BOOTS back then steps in, but into a ALL MIGHTY SPINEBUSTER!
Lashley roars again, drags Alexander back up, and gut wrenches to the DOMINATOR!! Lashley isn’t done there, he stalks Alexander as he stirs. Benjamin wants Lashley to stop but MVP mocks Benjamin with the begging and pleading. Lashley says it’ll stop, with this! A whip and another ALL MIGHTY SPINEBUSTER!! And then the HURT LOCK!! Alexander is out, Lashley wins!
Winner: Bobby Lashley, by submission
Benjamin attacks Lashley to get him off Alexander! Lashley catches Benjamin for a COMPLETE SHOT! Lashley stands tall as MVP says emotions cloud judgment. Lashley puts Benjamin in the HURT LOCK! MVP says this is all business, not personal, but Lashley sure seems to have a lot of rage. Will that same rage wreck McIntyre at WrestleMania?
Priest talks with Bunny backstage.
Priest and Bunny are going to address what Miz and Morrison did to the Bugatti, but will they be able to keep their cool this close to WrestleMania?
Bad Bunny & Damian Priest go to the ring!
Priest says Miz & Morrison crossed a line! It’s just because Bunny is a Grammy award winning, record smashing entertainment icon while they’re just yesterday’s news. Miz is so obsessed with Bunny that he couldn’t hold the WWE Championship for more than one week. If Miz & Morrison thought Priest & Bunny clowning them before was bad, they haven’t seen anything yet! It’s easy to beat someone down 2v1, so at WrestleMania, Priest wants to even the odds! Let’s make this a full tag team match, 2v2, Miz & Morrison VS Bunny & Priest! Bunny adds that, “I just came here, following my dreams, believing in my dreams, because i love this business. I love and respect every superstar.”
But Bunny remembers when he used to watch Raw, SmackDown and all the PPV’s with his dad and brothers and friends, the whole family. Bunny has a lot of good memories with the WWE, but now… Now Bunny isn’t sure how to feel. He isn’t what to think with this experience. Bunny came here to perform, to do a job, and is happy to have performed his song for Booker T! He loves and respects Booker, just like he does HHH, Stone Cold, the Undertaker, Ric Flair, ALL the legends! He even used to respect The Miz. But Miz doesn’t respect Bunny back, and didn’t from day one. And for no reason! Yes, Bunny did what he did, he isn’t a pro-wrestler, but he’s still man.
Miz broke Bunny’s TV set, he disrespected his DJ who is like a brother, and disrespected Bunny’s career, music and fans! For no reason! Bunny did jump from the top rope at the Royal Rumble, but c’mon! If even fans get that wouldn’t they do what Bunny did given a chance? Bunny translates all this to Spanish, and then says that’s no reason to attack someone with a guitar, paint his car. Who does the Miz think he is? Miz is a legend, Bunny respects that, but Miz doesn’t respect Bunny. “You crossed the line, bro.” Bunny doesn’t know why, and now he doesn’t care. This Saturday, WrestleMania, Bunny will show Miz to respect him as he shuts Miz’s mouth and whips his ass! You know where these two are from!? Bunny says that he will make Miz his bitch!!
Miz and Morrison mockingly applaud the “performance,” but it’s no Hey Hey, Hop Hop. Miz will make this clear: Bunny doesn’t belong here! WWE is THEIR world, Bunny’s overstayed his welcome. Miz promises to embarrass and hurt Bunny so that he’ll go crawling home. They accept the tag team challenge! Now, forget about the Bugatti, this stretch limousine is priceless. Miz and Morrison drive off, but they’ll have no choice but to face a furious Bunny and Archer of Infamy! Will Bunny & Priest #LiveForever when they defeat two of the best at the Showcase of the Immortals?
Sheamus talks with Mustafa Ali backstage.
The Fella knows he’s on his way to his match with The Bro, but there’s something he needs to know. Ali says there’s no need. “That space cadet represents everything that I want to change about Monday Night Raw.” Riddle killed Retribution and Ali isn’t US Champion! Sheamus has his match at Mania, but tonight, Ali owns Riddle! Sheamus tells Ali to relax. Sheamus and Ali don’t have much in common but there is one thing: their complete and utter dislike of the burnout holding onto the US Championship. Sheamus will be ringside rooting for Ali from commentary! But then Riddle flies through with the scooter! Will Ali bring Riddle back down from his high going into Mania?
Matt Riddle VS Mustafa Ali!
Raw returns as Ali makes his entrance. Sheamus also makes his entrance to go to commentary, and get in Riddle’s head. The bell rings, Ali and Riddle circle, and Riddle goes for a leg. Ali holds him off to get a headlock, but Riddle powers out. They tie up with a test of strength, Ali stands on a hand and wrenches the other. Riddle rolls, drags Ali into a Triangle Hold! ALi makes it a cover, TWO! Ali shoots in to waistlock but Riddle switches. Ali switches, Riddle gets an arm but Ali pulls hair. The ref counts, Ali lets off but ROCKS Riddle in the corner. Riddle tackles Ali, Ali kick shim away but runs into a GUT WRENCH! Riddle drags Ali up but ALi rolls Riddle up, TWO!
Sheamus gets annoyed already but Ali headlocks. Riddle powers out, but Ali dropkicks back! Cover, TWO! Ali clamps right on with a chinlock, but Riddle fights up. Riddle powers up but Ali throws a hand! Ali runs but Riddle tosses him up and out! Riddle then goes to the apron for a PENALTY KICK! Ali is down, Riddle drags him up and puts him in. Riddle takes Sheamus’ hat to put it on and mock Sheamus. But Ali returns to Russian Leg Sweep Riddle to the floor! Sheamus says that’s what Riddle gets, and Raw goes to break.
Raw returns again and Ali fires off on Riddle in a corner! The ref counts, Ali lets off but digs his boots into Riddle. Ali lets off again, then comes back to do it again. But Riddle fights up as he holds onto the boot, and he sweeps the leg! Riddle fires off fast hands, Ali shoves and ducks a kick to shove Riddle to ropes. Riddle sunset flips, Ali rolls through to stomp Riddle’s foot! Ali aims from a corner and runs to KICK Riddle in the side! Cover, TWO! Riddle still gasps and sputters but Ali drags him up into a body scissor squeeze! Riddle endures, Ali says Riddle doesn’t deserve the US title, but Riddle fights to get up. Ali is a backpack as Riddle RAMS him into buckles! And more buckles!
Riddle runs to BACKPACK BROTON! Both men are down, but Riddle gets to a corner. Riddle runs at Ali to rally with kicks and forearms, then spins Ali for a PELE! Riddle kips up and forearm smashes! Riddle goes side to side to forearm again! BROSPLODER! Kip up and Ali ducks the kick, dodges the moonsault, but the BROTON hits! Sheamus gets frustrated with Ali, but ALi catches Riddle to a KOJI KLUTCH! Ali calls it #LightsOut, but Riddle moves around and slips out to DEADLIFT FISHERMAN BUSTER!! Cover, TWO!! TRIANGLE! Riddle has Ali now, but Ali scrambles to the ropebreak! Riddle lets off and Sheamus is annoyed.
Sheamus admits, Riddle is great in the ring, but Sheamus is better. Ali throws Riddle into ropes! ALi spins Riddle around to suplex and GUTBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Riddle survives and Ali is furious! Ali shouts that Riddle is still unworthy, and he SLAPS Riddle around! Riddle boots, runs in but Ali elbows! Ali goes up and leaps, but the tornado is blocked! Riddle glares at Sheamus scoops Ali for the BRO DEREK!! Cover, Riddle wins!
Winner: Matt Riddle, by pinfall
Sheamus is furious but Riddle stares him down! WrestleMania, The Bro VS The Fella, only ONE leaves United States Champion!
Backstage interview with Drew McIntyre.
Is he threatened by Corbin’s desire to still take Lashley up on the offer and take McIntyre’s place at WrestleMania? “Heavy is the head that wears the crown.” You’d think someone with a giant melon head like Corbin’s would have a bigger brain so that he’d realize it’s foolish to go after McIntyre right before Mania and the world championship match. But McIntyre gets it. These are huge stakes. Corbin can take McIntyre out to take his spot in a Mania main event. McIntyre could say all sorts of horrible things about Corbin, but the truth is, Corbin’s big, dangerous and even in a normal match, will do whatever it takes to get the job done. With these stakes, he’d step on his own grandma to win.
But McIntyre says he’ll do the same as every time: Claymore to the eyes, straight through to Mania, him and Lashley, a date with destiny and McIntyre takes the title back! Will the Scottish Warrior slay the Wolf King before doing even worse to the Rocky Mountain Machine?
Drew McIntyre VS King Corbin!
In the main event of the last Raw before WrestleMania 37’s epic weekend event, this could be what makes or breaks the coming clash between McIntyre and Lashley! Will Corbin remove and replace McIntyre from the Showcase of the Immortals? Or will he just help sharpen the Claymore for when it aims at the All Mighty?
Sarah interviews Lashley backstage if a change in the main event changes how he’ll feel about the match? Well, there’s a huge “if” on whether McIntyre survives. McIntyre said he’d give Lashley an all mighty ass whooping, but that won’t be possible once he puts McIntyre in the Hurt Lock and puts him to sleep! Lashley is watching this main event closely, but Raw goes to break!
Raw returns once more and MVP has joined commentary on behalf of Lashley. The bell rings and the two tie up. Corbin powers McIntyre to ropes but McIntyre turns it around, only for the two of them to go all around the ring. They separate, and both men acknowledge the other’s strength. They tie up again, are in a deadlock now, but Corbin gests around to waistlock. McIntyre pries at the hold but Corbin headlocks him. McIntyre powers out, Corbin runs him over, but McIntyre gets right up. Corbin talks a little smack, MVP mockingly asks if McIntyre is alright, and McIntyre ties up to get a waistlock. McIntyre gets a half nelson, then shifts through to a cravat, then a headlock.
Corbin endures the grind, but can’t power out as McIntyre holds tight! Lashley is still watching as Corbin powers McIntyre to ropes. McIntyre lets go but Corbin throws a cheap shot! Corbin runs but McIntyre follows to run Corbin over! Corbin bails out and McIntyre grins. McIntyre wants MVP to be taking notes for Lashley while Corbin paces. Corbin gets back in, ties up with McIntyre and puts him in a corner. Corbin throws haymakers and body shots, then argues with the ref. McIntyre ROCKS Corbin with haymakers in return! McIntyre whips, runs Corbin over with an elbow then covers, ONE!! Corbin surprises McIntyre just a bit but McIntyre stomps Corbin’s hand!
McIntyre hauls Corbin up, snap suplexes him, then covers, TWO! Corbin took a little longer that time but McIntyre is focused. McIntyre drags Corbin up, CHOPS him, then throws hands in a corner. McIntyre whips corner to corner, Corbin reverses and runs in, but has to slide out. Corbin slides in to LARIAT! Cover, ONE!! Now McIntyre surprises Corbin, but Corbin puts McIntyre on ropes to choke him! The ref counts, Corbin lets off, and Corbin looms over McIntyre in a corner. Corbin digs his boots in, the ref counts and Corbin lets off. Corbin rains down rights, then stomps, but the ref counts. Corbin stops and stalks McIntyre around the ring.
Corbin whips McIntyre corner to corner hard and McIntyre bounces off buckles! Corbin smirks and MVP likes what he sees. Corbin looms over McIntyre and MVP tells Corbin to finish it! Corbin talks some trash, drags McIntyre up and back suplexes for a SLAM! Cover, TWO! McIntyre grits his teeth, Corbin brings him up and whips him corner to corner, but McIntyre comes back to rally with clotheslines! McIntyre whips, then OVERHEAD SUPLEXES Corbin! Then clinches for another OVERHEAD SUPLEX! Corbin swings but into McIntyre’s NECKBREAKER! McIntyre kips up, fires up, and glares at MVP. MVP mockingly asks how it’s going.
McIntyre aims as Corbin rises, and kicks low to underhook the arms! Corbin scrambles to deny Future Shock, then bails out. McIntyre pursues but Corbin trips him on the apron! Corbin whips but McIntyre reverses to POST Corbin! McIntyre then whips Corbin into steel steps! McIntyre has a wild look in his eyes as Raw goes to break!
Raw returns once again as McIntyre fires off on Corbin in a corner! The ref counts, McIntyre lets off to drag Corbin up, for a NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO!! Corbin survives as McIntyre shows more of his arsenal. McIntyre SLAPS Corbin, Corbin throws a haymaker and now it’s a brawl! McIntyre windmills haymakers on Corbin, then lets off as they’re on the ropes. Lashley is still watching as McIntyre shoves Corbin. Corbin holds ropes, puts McIntyre on the apron, and ROCKS him with an uppercut! Corbin POSTS McIntyre and McIntyre hits the floor! MVP claps but tells Corbin to stay on McIntyre!
Corbin drags McIntyre up, brings him around and bumps him off the desk! MVP likes this “table service” as Corbin puts McIntyre back in. Corbin drives elbows into McIntyre’s neck and shoulders, but the ref reprimands the hair pulling. Corbin talks trash, McIntyre ROCKS Corbin! Corbin hits back, drags McIntyre up, but McIntyre throws more hands! McIntyre CHOPS then reels Corbin in. Corbin denies the suplex to suplex McIntyre back! Cover, TWO!! McIntyre is still in this and MVP grows frustrated. Corbin drags McIntyre up, roll shim, and has a Pluma Blanca while throwing down furious elbows!! Corbin lets off and McIntyre clutches his jaw.
MVP says this is Corbin’s chance, and Corbin drags McIntyre back up. McIntyre hits back with haymakers and CHOPS! McIntyre runs but into a choke grip! For a CHOKE SLAM! Cover, TWO!! Corbin seethes as McIntyre survives. McIntyre gets to a corner, Corbin runs in, but McIntyre dodges! Corbin slides out, slides in but into a SPINEBUSTER! Jackknife cover, TWO! Corbin survives and McIntyre is just a bit surprised. McIntyre keeps on Corbin with a facelock, and shifts to underhooks, but Corbin RAMS McIntyre into a corner. McIntyre elbows back hard, then runs, but into a SIDEWALK SLAM! Cover, TWO! Corbin is furious but McIntyre still lives!
MVP shouts, “Corbin, do you want to go to WrestleMania?” Corbin reels McIntyre in but gets a GLASGOW KISS! then a FUTURE SHOCK!! Cover, TWO!?! Corbin survives and McIntyre is beside himself. McIntyre goes to the corner, goes out and climbs up, but Corbin ROCKS him first! Corbin throws more hands, climbs up after him, rains down some rights, and stands McIntyre up. SUPERPLEX! Corbin crawls to a cover, TWO!! McIntyre isn’t done yet and now MVP is speechless. McIntyre rolls away to a corner, Corbin goes to the other. McIntyre grits his teeth, clutches his back, but he glares at Corbin. McIntyre crawls that way, stands up, but Corbin ROCKS him!
McIntyre hits back! Corbin hits again, but McIntyre kicks low! Corbin throws another haymaker but McIntyre kicks, haymakers, CHOPS, and runs into DEEP SIX!! Cover, TWO!! MVP excuses himself from commentary to talk to Corbin. “IT’s not about beating McIntyre! It’s about taking him out! Take him OUT!” MVP hands his cane over, and Corbin nods. Corbin aims at McIntyre, but McIntyre dodges to CLAYMORE!! Cover, McIntyre wins!!
Winner: Drew McIntyre, by pinfall
MVP clearing things up only cost Corbin! The Scottish Warrior slays the Wolf King, and now only has one match to go! Will the next five days be the All Mighty Era’s last? But wait, here comes Lashley! MVP meets Lashley at the stage, and Lashley stares McIntyre down. Who will give more of themselves in order to have the WWE World Championship?
Not a great go-home but not an awful one. This did suffer from the usual go-home problems of just too many recaps and commercial breaks. Just, so much, even for what happened in this episode. We didn’t need to recap what happened to Bunny’s car right before he and Priest talked about it. But now, the info that leaked months ago is finally verified, we’re getting a tag match of Bunny & Priest VS Miz & Morrison, so that it isn’t all on Bunny going against Miz to win. The promos were good, though, and it seems like Miz is being hypocritical. He wasn’t respected for coming in as a reality show guy, but says Bunny doesn’t belong as just a celebrity fan. This should be used as material but it isn’t because Vince doesn’t know what “continuity” means.
The promo before the Woods VS Styles rematch was fun because of Riddle using weed references, but I feel like that all took longer than the match. Woods getting the quick win on Styles thanks to Kofi and Omos distracting Styles surely means that somehow, someway, Omos and Styles win the titles. That’s going to be big for Omos, and means WWE/Vince sees a lot of potential in him, let’s just hope Vince doesn’t get bored and leaves Omos wallowing in the midcard one day. Speaking of Riddle, I like that his other gag is interrupting other people with his scooter fly-by. Sheamus and Ali had a good segment, Ali VS Riddle was a really good match, and Riddle VS Sheamus is going to be great and could go either way.
Braun had a good promo about how he’s doing this for those bullied mentally and emotionally, though he might’ve missed a few things here and there. I still don’t think a steel cage was the best stipulation, but maybe it’s just a way to literally keep the fight contained to the ring rather than having a Last Man Standing type spill out towards fans when we’re supposed to keep social distance and whatnot. No idea who wins this but it’d be a shame if Shane did through his cheating. Braun’s had a decent Mania run, winning the Raw Tag Team Championships and looking strong, so I would hope he wins to stand tall for those he’s representing.
I had a feeling Rhea would make sure Asuka lost the tag match tonight as she’s going Heel for this story, but I didn’t think she’d attack Asuka herself. That was a good twist, as Rhea isn’t the kind to run away and avoid things, so that much still carries over from Face Rhea. Asuka will definitely want revenge and that will add to the intensity of their match, and I personally hope Asuka retains. The tag champions get momentum but the Tag Turmoil to determine their challengers is only slightly what I was expecting. I hope this one time, WWE throws away their Face VS Heel requirement and let Natty & Tamina win so we can get a really great match, each team having a technical type and a powerhouse. Then Natty & Tamina should win when Nia & Shayna fall apart, because neither Natty or Tamina has had anything in quite some time.
The world title story was pretty good tonight, with Lashley settling things with Benjamin & Alexander. It is sad to know that the Hurt Business split was all Vince, but who else’s idea would it have been? Lashley is dominant again, but McIntyre VS Corbin was a great match to be the main event here. They started a bit late on this whole thing of a bounty on McIntyre’s head, it didn’t really feel like McIntyre was ever going to miss Mania, but I suppose they get an A for effort. Lashley VS McIntyre will be really good if it even just matches tonight’s match. It’d be pretty wild for McIntyre if he becomes a 3-time champion in the span of just one year, but it’s hard to say he won’t get this win. You might as well flip a coin because both Lashley and McIntyre have been putting in work, either one is worthy.
My Score: 8/10
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