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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (4/12/21)

The Raw After WrestleMania!

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Coverage Raw 2021

WrestleMania 37 is over, but how does Raw handle the aftermath?

Raw makes land after WrestleMania’s high seas adventure, and while we’re STILL in the All Might Era, we’ve also entered a new NIGHTMARE!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Matt Riddle; Lashley wins.
  • Cedric Alexander & Shelton Benjamin VS The Viking Raiders; The Viking Raiders win.
  • Raw Women’s Championship: Rhea Ripley VS Asuka; Asuka wins by disqualification, Rhea retains the title.
  • 2v1 Handicap: The Miz & John Morrison w/ Maryse VS Damian Priest; Miz & Morrison win.
  • Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler VS Dana Brooke & Mandy Rose; Jax & Baszler win, by count-out.
  • The New Day VS Elias & Jaxson Ryker; The New Day wins.
  • WWE World Championship Triple Threat: Drew McIntyre VS Braun Strowman VS Randy Orton; McIntyre wins and will challenge Bobby Lashley for the title at WrestleMania Backlash.

PLAY BY PLAY

Bobby Lashley and MVP arrive in the NEW ThunderDome, the University of South Florida’s Yuengling Center.

The staff and superstars all applaud, and some even ask for autographs. Matt Riddle gives Lashley congrats, but the real excitement doesn’t start until the next day! And so even though Riddle is busted up, he wants to challenge Lashley! Wait, he got whooped by Sheamus but wants to step to Riddle? He must be out of his mind! Well, maybe. Riddle did wear a tinfoil hat to school because he thought aliens abducted him and were sending him messages, but then Riddle just realized his braces were picking up radio waves.

Lashley stops Riddle there and says he just went to war with Drew McIntyre at WrestleMania. He will be damned if he faced someone lesser. He is just here to celebrate and address the fans, that is all! Well okay. But wasn’t it a few weeks ago that Lashley said anyone could have a chance at the championship? And then it was March 8th, 2021, “Everybody in the locker room knows that the same thing that happened to The Miz will happen to them if they step into the ring with me!” And then, Riddle quotes Lashley again, “I worked too long and too hard to become WWE Champion!” Lashley SMACKS Riddle of his own scooter!

Lashley tells Riddle he is a loser, and Lashley is a winner. Tonight, he’ll show Riddle the difference. So is that a yes to the match? Will the Bro come to regret getting on the Rocky Mountain Machine’s bad side?

 

Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Matt Riddle!

Corey Graves and Adnan Virk both join Raw’s commentary team now, and this is quite the moment to start with! Because bro, Riddle might be taking on more than he can handle after he took on and lost to the Fella over the WWE US Championship. And then Lashley CLOBBERS Riddle as he scooters to ringside! Will Riddle even stand a chance in this fight?!

Lashley throws Riddle around ringside, then RAMS him into barriers! And again! And again! The ref reprimands but Lashley drags Riddle up to whip him all the way into more barriers! This isn’t a match yet, Lashley is just hurting Riddle, as he fireman’s carries and POSTS him! Lashley glares at Riddle as he stalks up behind him. Riddle manages to get up but Lashley RAMS him into barriers! Lashley finally puts Riddle in the ring, Riddle flounders to a corner, and he glares up at Lashley. The bell rings, this is finally a match, and Lashley fires off haymakers! Lashley bumps Riddle off buckles, and again! Lashley gets in Riddle’s face before he bumps him off buckles again!

Riddle sputters, Lashley drags Riddle up and RAMS into him over and over! The ref counts, Lashley lets off and whips Riddle corner to corner. Lashley runs in, and RAMS into Riddle again! MVP likes what he sees as Lashley hits a NECKBREAKER! Riddle sits up in a daze but Lashley hauls him up for a suplex! Lashley holds Riddle up, with one arm! And then after a count of 10, he SLAMS Riddle down! MVP says Lashley can do whatever he wants! Lashley goes outside and gets Riddle’s scooter! Lashley TOSSES it up the ramp! Lashley goes back to the ring, but Riddle fires off body shots! Riddle forearms, but Lashley scoops and SLAMS him down!

Lashley throws Riddle out, goes out after him, and military presses Riddle up to TOSS over the barriers!! Lashley leaves Riddle for dead out there as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Riddle fights back but Lashley stomps him down! Lashley looms over Riddle, and knocks him back down! Riddle writhes but Lashley shows no mercy. Lashley clamps onto Riddle with a knuckle digging into Riddle’s jaw! Riddle fights up, fights free, runs but Lashley follows to get Riddle for a flurry of knees! Buckle shot to a COMPLETE SHOT! Cover, TWO!! Riddle still lives but Lashley rains down rights on him! Lashley digs his knuckles in again but Riddle gets a ropebreak with a foot. Lashley lets off, he puts Riddle on ropes and chokes him! Lashley lets off at the ref’s count, but comes back with crossface forearms!

Riddle flounders as Lashley lets off again, and Lashley stomps him down! Lashley stands on Riddle’s chest but the ref counts. Lashley lets off, to stand on Riddle’s head! MVP says Lashley can do what he wants as Lashley whips and CLOBBERS Riddle! Lashley gets Riddle up to snap suplex and then dig his knuckles in again! The ref counts, Lashley lets off, and then he slams Riddle’s arm into the mat! And the other arm! Then he stomps Riddle’s hand! Lashley sits Riddle up, neck wrenches, but Riddle fights up to throw hands back! Riddle backs Lashley down but Lashley CLOBBERS him again! Lashley looms over Riddle again, brings him up and whips, but Riddle blocks!

Lashley tries again, but Riddle escapes the spinebuster! Riddle fires off hands, kicks, but gets caught! Riddle still gets around, ripcord, FINAL FLASH! Riddle gets Lashley in a drop zone and goes up top! FLOATING BRO- NO! Lashley catches him to a HURT LOCK!! Lashley thrashes Riddle, Riddle taps, Lashley wins!

Winner: Bobby Lashley, by submission

The All Mighty couldn’t be stopped, even just a few days out from having faced the Scottish Warrior! If Lashley can keep putting on the hurt, will anyone ever stop him?

 

Backstage interview with Rhea Ripley.

The NEW Raw Women’s Champion is already defending her title! But it’s about confidence in herself. It’s what led her to challenge Asuka in the first place, and what allowed her to beat one of the best ever to become champion. What the WWE Universe witnessed last night was the “brutal new order” of the Women’s Division. And in this WrestleMania rematch, she will prove again that she IS ready for Asuka! Will the Empress of Tomorrow redeem herself for what happened yesterday?

 

Cedric Alexander & Shelton Benjamin VS The Viking Raiders!

#PRIMED Alexander & The Gold Standard are about to run into a raid! Erik & Ivar are back, will they ransack the Raw Tag Team Division once again?

The teams sort out, Alexander asks Ivar, “How’s the neck?” They tie up, throw hands, and Ivar throws Cedric to throw hands back! The ref counts, Ivar lets off and tags in Erik. They whip Alexander, scoop and SLAM, to then have Erik scoop slam SENTON Ivar onto Alexander! Alexander hurries away, tags in Benjamin, and Benjamin sucker punches Ivar! Alexander chop blocks Erik and Benjamin KNEES him down! Cover, TWO! Erik is still in this but Benjamin is after him with a scoop and SLAM! And another scoop SLAM! Benjamin drags Erik up, Erik shoves him away but Benjamin stomps Erik back down.

Benjamin stays between the Vikings, then drags Erik up in a facelock for some knees. Benjamin CLUBS Erik down, then snap suplexes! Cover, TWO! Benjamin tags Alexander, they keep Erik down with elbow drops! Alexander fires off body shots, rams into Erik, then lets off. Alexander digs his forearms into Erik and talks trash, then KNEES low! Alexander brings Erik out but Erik ROCKS him with a right! Alexander grabs at Erik but Erik puts him in a corner. Alexander clubs free, ROCKS Erik back, then talks more trash. Alexander clubs Erik down, drags him back up, and whips him but Erik gets around to clinch! Alexander fights free with elbow after elbow!

Alexander brings Erik up, tags Benjamin, and they hand off for Benjamin to back suplex. Erik fights free, ROCKS Alexander, ROCKS Benjamin, but Alexander KNEES Erik! OLYMPIC SLAM from Benjamin! Cover, TWO!! Erik survives but Benjamin tags Alexander. Alexander elbows Erik on the back, brings him back up, and whips, only for Erik to reverse! Ace Ten Mao!! Both men are down, crawl for their corners, hot tags to Benjamin and Ivar! The War Beard and Gold Standard fire off hands! Ivar gets the edge, whips and runs Benjamin over and over! Whip and scoop for a SIDEWALK SLAM! BIG VIKING SPLASH!

Ivar fires up and so do the fans on their ThunderDome screens, but Benjamin knees back. Benjamin whips but runs into the SEATED SENTON! Ivar fires up even more and he drags Benjamin up. Benjamin powers Ivar to the corner, tags Alexander and they mug Ivar. They double whip, but Ivar cartwheels around to DOUBLE LARIAT! Tag to Erik, Ivar CLOBBERS Benjamin! Erik uses Ivar to HIP ATTACK Benjamin! Ivar gets Alexander, feeds him to Erik, THOR’S HAMMER!! Cover, the Viking Raiders win!

Winners: The Viking Raiders, by pinfall

The #VikingExperience is back! Will the warpath head for gold once again?

 

Backstage interview with Asuka.

How is she approaching this rematch? “Last night, Rhea Ripley brought the fight. But now, it’s MY turn!” Asuka says in Japanese and then in English that losing was a nightmare. But tonight, she is ready for Rhea, and then once again be Raw Women’s Champion!! The Empress is fired up, will she end Rhea’s reign at just 24 hours?

 

Charlotte Flair is here!

The Queen returns to Raw and heads to the ring! She gets a mic, soaks in the cheers from the ThunderDome, and says, “So here I am, on the Raw After WrestleMania. And typically, I’d be standing here with my big ol’ Flair smile, but I wasn’t on WrestleMania.” She wasn’t welcomed. She knows what some are thinking: It’s just one Mania! She’s been on five! No, she is a franchise player, a genuine superstar, and what she does is sacred to the Flair family. It wasn’t even her fault! It was all things out of her control and that is unacceptable!

Was it her fault Asuka needed a tag partner? Was it her fault Ric Flair showed up on Legends Night acting like a fool? Was it her fault that Lacey Evans just went and got pregnant before Charlotte could kick her ass? NO! She didn’t try, either! She even challenged Asuka on Raw for the title, but Asuka didn’t respond! Some champion, huh? But that opportunist, Rhea, challenged Asuka and Asuka accepted. Rhea won, a new champion was crowned and a star was born! Out with the old, in with the new! But don’t act like every other woman wasn’t happy that Charlotte wasn’t here! Y’know what everyone thought? “This is MY opportunity to be on WrestleMania!”

But kudos to Rhea! Because now, she’s the biggest snake in the locker room! Even ASUKA manipulated her way to tonight’s rematch! But as they say, “Karma is a BITCH. And I’m that bitch.” Sasha Banks, Bianca Belair, Shayna Baszler, Nia Jax, so on and so forth. No one compares to CHARLOTTE. And what Charlotte realized for the first time in about seven years, after watching Mania at home, “I don’t steal opportunities. I AM the opportunity!” So to all the delusional fans at home that think she steals things for your favorites, NO! She makes those opportunities! This is a NEW Charlotte! She won’t apologize for being that damn good! You will bow down to the THIRTEEN TIME Women’s Champion!!

No more little humble Charlotte. So everyone needs to show their respect to what she has done! She’s dedicated YEARS of her life to this! Tears, blood and sweat. And what has anyone given her in return? Exactly, NOTHING. Enjoy the match that SHE should’ve been in! Mic drop of mic drops right here! Will The Queen go after whoever comes out with the title tonight?

 

Raw Women’s Championship: Rhea Ripley VS Asuka!

The Nightmare became reality when her brutality was more than ready, ended Asuka’s reign at 330 days, and now she starts her first day as champion! But will the first day be the last when she gives Asuka her WrestleMania rematch already?

Raw returns as Rhea makes her entrance. The introductions are made, the belt is raised and WrestleMania continues on Raw!

Rhea and Asuka circle, approach and tie right up. Rhea puts Asuka in a corner but Asuka turns it around to fire off! The ref counts, Rhea goes after Asuka! Rhea puts Asuka back in a corner, keeps on her with haymakers, but lets off as the ref counts. Asuka drop toeholds but Rhea blocks hitting buckles this time! Rhea drags Asuka up to TOSS her away! Rhea gets Asuka up, Asuka fights but Rhea CLUBS her down! Rhea hauls Asuka up to CLUB her on the back again, and again, then has her at the ropes. Rhea gets Asuka up for a back suplex, but Asuka victory rolls, ONE!! Rhea sits up but into KICKS! Rhea blocks, but Asuka throws her for an ARMBAR!

Rhea scrambles, gets the ropebreak, but Asuka is after her! Rhea hits back, bumps Asuka off buckles, then hoists her up top backwards. Rhea climbs, Asuka elbows away on her, but Rhea gets back to dropkick Asuka down! Asuka tumbles to the floor, the ref reprimands but Rhea smirks as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Rhea has Asuka in a body scissor squeeze. Asuka fights, make sit a cover, ONE as Rhea lets her go! Rhea CLOBBERS Asuka and wags her finger. Rhea drags Asuka up, whips her hard into a corner, but Asuka just gets mad! Rhea drags Asuka up again, bumps her off buckles again and again, then lets off as the ref counts. Rhea stomps Asuka, lets off again, but Asuka elbows her away! Asuka boots, hops up, and leaps for a missile dropkick! Rhea and Asuka are both down and the ThunderDome fans rally on their screens! Rhea sits up, checks her jaw, but Asuka stands, POP-UP KNEE! GERMAN SUPLEX! Rhea is in a corner, Asuka HIP ATTACKS, but no bulldog!

Rhea walks into a ROUNDHOUSE, and a HEEL KICK! SLIDING WIZARD! Cover, TWO!! Rhea survives and Asuka grows desperate. Asuka goes back up top, leaps again, but just misses as Rhea moves! Rhea stomps Asuka, gets the legs, PRISM TRAP!! Rhea pulls on the ankle but Asuka endures and reaches! ROPEBREAK! Asuka holds on but Rhea yanks her for a FACEBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Asuka is still in this and Rhea grows frustrated. Rhea pushes Asuka around, talks trash, but Asuka fires back! Rhea blocks a punch, spins Asuka to cravat and knee away! Rhea snapmares and runs but now she misses! Rhea dodges the Sliding Wizard but Asuka foils the Electric Chair!

Asuka gets up, Rhea tries again, and Rhea gets Asuka up only for Asuka to throw hands! Rhea shifts Asuka to a fireman’s carry, but Asuka makes it a CRUCIFIX DRIVER! Both women are down from that but Asuka crawls to a cover, TWO!! FUJIWARA ARMBAR!! Asuka pulls, Rhea endures, fights and rolls but into an ASUKA LOCK!!! Asuka hasn’t got it completely on as Rhea moves around! Rhea pries at Asuka’s chinbar hold, fights up to her feet, and she RAMS Asuka into a buckle! Rhea is free, and she Electric Chair lifts again, for the FACEBUSTER! Cover, TWO!?! Asuka survives and is driving Rhea mad!

Rhea sees Asuka go to the apron and follows. Rhea wants to return the favor from last night but Asuka shoves her into a POST! And then HIP ATTACKS her into the post! APRON DDT!! The ring count starts, Asuka gets Rhea up, but CHARLOTTE ATTACKS!

Winner: Asuka, by disqualification; Rhea retains the title

Charlotte RAMS Asuka into steps, then into barriers! Charlotte rains down rights on Asuka, then she runs and BOOTS Rhea down!! Charlotte throws forearms on Asuka then EXPLODERS Asuka into the LED! Charlotte BOOTS her into it! Rhea sits up, Charlotte BOOTS her into it, too! Charlotte mocks the Empress and the Nightmare, and says, “I’m baaaack~!” Will she be back on top now that she’s no longer holding back?

 

The Miz & John Morrison talk backstage.

They’re excited that their social media is blowing up, and “There she is~!” Maryse is here! But why? What? She’s their guest on Miz TV, remember? Oh, duh. Morrison forgot that. The It Couple and Guru of Greatness head out, will they still be must-see even after their Mania loss?

 

Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler laugh at replays from WrestleMania.

Though they’re still champions, the Tag Team Turmoil match had one obvious mishap: Mandy Rose slipping and falling on her butt. And these two can’t get enough of it! Mandy storms over and asks if they’re done. She gets it, she found a new way to trend. It was a bit embarrassing, but she can laugh at herself. She got up fast, but so funny when you don’t see things coming, right? SLAP! And then the Sexy Muscle Friends RAM Nia into barrels! Will Mandy & Dana be having the last laugh?

 

Raw returns to Alexa’s Playground.

“WrestleMania was so much fun!” Now, you’re probably wondering why she did what she did. Well maybe this little story will help explain. “Once upon a time, there was a little girl who was lost. Until one day, she was rescued by the darkness.” She of course means herself and how The Fiend snatched her up. “The darkness protected her, nurtured her, and taught her everything it knew. But then the darkness went away.” Alexa wonders if that was when the little girl realized that she didn’t need “the darkness” after all. “How do you think it made her feel when she realized she could do everything on her own?”

Was the darkness helping her? Or was it in her way? Why else would she use what she was taught to try and destroy “the darkness?” Is it true that the female of the species is the deadliest? We may never know. But here’s what we know for sure: that along the way, she unlocked something truly evil. Meet her new friend, Lily! It’s a rather creepy doll… Trust Alexa when she says that their fun is just getting started. The Fiend may be back, but does something far more wicked this way come?

 

Raw presents an all new Miz TV!

The Miz, Maryse and Morrison head to the ring together, and the Raw After Mania is even more Must-See! But what will they have to say after the break?

Raw returns and the trio are seated in the ring, and Miz welcomes us back to the Most Must-See WWE Talk Show. WrestleMania has come and gone and what a whirlwind! History was made, and yet despite everything that has happened, Miz remains the most talked about entertainer in all of entertainment! And he knows what you’re thinking: Why is Miz’s beautiful wife, Maryse, here? What is the most gorgeous, vivacious and intelligent mother in reality TV doing here? Morrison of course knows but tell us all! Well it’s because tonight, after Raw, the USA Network has the new season of Miz & Mrs! That does make sense!

But sense they’re both here, what about a spin-off? Miz, Mrs & Morrison! #MMM! Catchy, right? No, not really. Their tag line can be, “It’s delicious!” No, no, Morrison, there’s no spin-off! Morrison is even in tonight’s episode, because it’s about the time they made a commercial for Maryse’s Yaupon Tea Glow Awakening Moisturizer! What a great episode and an awesome commercial! The greatest commercial of the 21st century! *Stare off into distance* What does Maryse think? It’s… awesome. Right! And this season is so big! And there’s all the buzz from Miz taking Bad Bunny, a megastar in the musical industry, and making him into a true WWE superstar!

Maryse kisses Miz on the cheek and says he is so giving. Never before have we seen someone like Bad Bunny do what Bad Bunny did! And it would’ve never happened without Miz’s tutelage! Let’s look at some highlights from that match at WrestleMania! The Falcon Arrow, the Super Crossbody, and Morrison’s great looking back muscles. History was made, because it takes two to tangle! Without Miz, Bunny would’ve been a flop! But here comes Damian Priest! Priest tells Miz that Bunny doesn’t have Miz to thank. Priest was Bunny’s tag partner and not even Priest is going to take credit for Bunny’s accomplishments. Bunny shocked the world by putting in the work to live the dream.

And if memory serves Priest right, Miz said Bunny didn’t belong. Is Miz saving face? Priest reminds us of the headline: Bad Bunny Beats Miz. Well where’s Priest name in that headline?! Where was he in the highlight reel?! Priest is jealous that he got upstaged by his so-called friend! Meanwhile, Miz has had many Mania moments, including beating Cena in the main event! So Miz can even face Priest tonight! Morrison wanted to do the same thing! They argue over who gets after Priest, but Maryse shouts over them. They can both fight him, wink wink. Oh right… Handicap!

Priest tells them all to stop. They’re just idiots, aren’t they? But fine, he’ll take a handicap match. The headline will then read Priest beats BOTH Miz ‘n’ Morrison! Priest storms down to the ring, but Miz ‘n’ Morrison aren’t dressed to compete! Will the Greatest Tag Team of the 21st Century have to put up or shut up after the break?

 

2v1 Handicap: The Miz & John Morrison w/ Maryse VS Damian Priest!

Raw returns and suits or not, the fight is on! Miz starts and Priest ROCKS him with body shots and a haymaker! Priest BOOTS Morrison, dodges Miz and fires off hands! Morrison storms over but Priest DECKS him! Miz BOOTS Priest, stomps him down, then drags Priest up. Tag to Morrison for the 21st Century Classic, catapult forearm and elbow drop! Cover, ONE!! Morrison throws off his jacket, KICKS Priest down, then clamps on a chinlock while clubbing away! Priest endures, fights up as fans rally on their screens, and Priest pries free! Morrison throws an elbow, RAMS Priest into the corner and fires off heavy shots!

Miz tags in, Miz talks trash but Priest ROCKS Morrison and dodges the lariat! Priest dodges the boot, blocks a punch to ROUNDHOUSE, and Morrison ends up in a corner. Priest hits a flying back elbow to Morrison! Then one to Miz! Then another to Morrison before the BROKEN ARROW! Priest fires off kicks on Miz, ROCKS him but Miz dodges, only to turn around into a WHEEL KICK! Priest clamps onto Miz with a choke grip, for the SOUTH OF HEAVEN! Morrison SHINING WIZARDS Priest down! Miz crawls over, hot tag to Morrison, only for Priest to CLOBBER him! Priest gets to a corner, climbs up top, but Morrison scrambles out of the ring.

Priest hops down, sees Miz ‘n’ Morrison regroup, and he runs to FLY out onto them!! Priest drags Morrison up and in, climbs up again, but Miz drags him down! Priest elbows Miz away then BOOTS him! Priest climbs, Morrison ROCKS him! Morrison throws more forearms, climbs up top, but Priest fights him off with elbows. Priest gets down to ROUNDHOUSE Morrison off the top! Priest climbs back up, leaps, FLYING WHEEL KICK! Cover, TWO!! Morrison survives but Priest grits his teeth. Priest paces, takes aim and choke grips Morrison. Morrison breaks free, elbow shim away and Miz tags in before Priest scoops Morrison! HIT THE LIGHTS!!

But Miz gets Priest for the full nelson! Priest fights out, Miz drags Miz out to save him, but not for long as Priest drags him back in! Priest rips Miz’s shirt off, drags him up but Maryse distracts on the apron. Miz rolls Priest up, puts his legs on the ropes, and wins!!

Winners: The Miz & John Morrison, by pinfall

The Miz may have his pants down, but he comes out the winner! Of course, after having his wife help him on top of this being a handicap match. Will the Archer of Infamy make sure to get his payback on them all soon enough?

 

Backstage interview with Shayna Baszler & Nia Jax.

After that altercation with the Sexy Muscle Friends, we’re getting a 2v2 match later on! Nia says the replay wasn’t necessary, we saw it 20 minutes ago! But it was rhetorical. This is all to embarrass her, but they’d have to be pretty dumb to do that! Either way, Mandy & Dana orchestrated a cowardly attack just to deflect from Mandy’s blooper. But after the beating Nia & Shayna give them, no one will be talking about them! That match, is next!

Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler VS Dana Brooke & Mandy Rose!

The Irresistible Force & Queen of Spades are already the most aggressive and dominant tag team in the Women’s Division, and that’s when they’re in a good mood! Now that Dana & Mandy have angered them, how much more dangerous will they be?

Raw returns and the champions make their entrance for this non-title match. But they get in each other’s way and Nia stumbles as she enters! So now Mandy & Dana have something to laugh at Nia about. The teams sort out, Nia is seething as she starts with Dana, but Dana dodges. Nia RAMS Dana into a corner, then brings her around to TOSS her! Dana ends up in an open corner and Nia SPLASHES her down! Nia digs her boot into Dana as she shouts, “You wanna laugh at me?!” Nia lets off, scrapes Dana’s face on ropes, then pushes her around. Nia drags Dana up, tags Shayna, and Shayna feeds Dana to Nia’s BODY CHECK! Shayna KICKS Dana down, covers, TWO!

Shayna gets a leg, stands on the foot and lets her hair down as she STOMPS it! Dana clutches her ankle, Shayna drags Dana around and gets her up for a STRETCH MUFFLER! Dana endures, Shayna lifts Dana and tags Nia in. Shayna SWINGS Dana into buckles like Nia would, and Nia runs to drop an elbow! Cover, TWO! Dana is still in this but Nia clamps on with a cobra clutch. Nia thrashes Dana around and shouts, “What’s so funny!?” Fans rally, Dana fights up and jawbreakers free! Nia shoves Dana, scoops her, but Dana tilt-o-whirls, but no DDT as Nia throws her away! Dana ROUNDHOUSES back! Shayna tags in, gets between the Sexy Muscle Friends, but Dana still tags Mandy!

Dana dodges, Mandy goes up, and missile dropkicks Shayna down! Mandy rallies with lariats, then a FLAPJACK! Mandy kips up, fans fire up with her and she RAMS Shayna into a corner! Mandy RAMS into Shayna again and again, then lets off to run in. Shayna dodges the knee, but Mandy dodges a knee, too! KNEE FROM A ROSE, and Mandy reels Shayna in for a TIGER- NO! Shayna fights free, gets around, KIRAFUDA KLUTCH!! Mandy runs and puts Shayna into ropes! Nia tags in and stalks Mandy. “You think it’s funny, huh?!” Nia puts Mandy in the ring, storms up, but then Nia slips and hits her face on the apron!

Nia storms after Mandy, Mandy and Dana get away, but Dana says it’s not worth getting hurt. Nia is furious, but the ring count is climbing! Nia & Shayna win!

Winners: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler, by count-out

The Sexy Muscle Friends live to fight another day, and maybe have a laugh at Nia’s expense. Will Nia be able to shake all this off and make sure the Raw Women’s Division takes her seriously?

 

MVP is in the ring!

Montel Vontavius Porter says this is an official announcement from The Hurt business., The All Mighty Bobby Lashley will join him shortly, but he wants to speak on his victory. Saturday, WrestleMania 37 Night One, Lashley retained his WWE World Championship. All he wanted to do tonight was address the fans and celebrate, but he could not. MVP will stress some points: McIntyre is an absolute WARRIOR, truly, and was one of the most dominant WWE Champions the world has ever seen. But McIntyre took his eyes of the target for just a second and that is where he finished.

McIntyre, it is okay to be number two when Lashley is number one. McIntyre gave it his all and it was respectable. But MVP has said it is always a matter of time until Lashley puts on the Hurt Lock. When that happens, it is over! We saw McIntyre pass out to it! How do you think McIntyre feels today? Walking around with his head held high? Nope! He can barely lift his head at all after the intense pressure of the Hurt Lock. And if McIntyre can’t handle it, then who can?! NO ONE. But McIntyre is here?! The Scottish Warrior has a mic to tell MVP, “How the hell would you know how I feel?” Well he must feel rather humbled.

McIntyre says Mania was going to come down to a few things: Claymore; Hurt Lock; and who makes the first mistake. McIntyre admits he made the first mistake when he let MVP distract him. But yes, the Hurt Lock is powerful, and you can’t do much about it when it’s on. McIntyre passed out at Mania and MVP feels great! MVP can brag about it! No humility whatsoever! And it’s working for MVP! Just look at him! Top of the world! But keep on this path, keep growing the ego. Keep Lashley in those fancy suits, pretty little sunglasses, and milk the cash cow for all he’s worth and kissing up to his ass. Lashley’s head should be as big as possible because eventually, McIntyre will get a rematch.

McIntyre will connect with the Claymore, and he wants Lashley to fall as far as possible for when he looks up at the new WWE Champion, Drew McIntyre. MVP says he respects Lashley, but even McIntyre can respect this: Nothing around here is given> Everything must be earned. Wait, here comes BRAAAUN! MVP says McIntyre can take his ass to the back of the line! But why is Mr. Strowman here? For once, Strowman agrees with MVP. McIntyre lost, so he goes to the back while the Monster Among Men steps to the front after what he did to Shane McMahon in a steel cage! Strowman and McIntyre are face to face but here comes Randy Orton! MVP loses his mind!

The line starts and ends with Lashley, so what is the Viper doing here? Orton says The Fiend and Alexa are no more, so no more mind games for Orton! That means Orton has all the time in the world to focus on what he is truly great at: being the Legend Killer, being the Apex Predator, being the Viper. But most of all, that means being WWE World Champion again. MVP is getting annoyed with this but here comes Adam Pearce! He sees where this is all going. Everyone makes excellent points so the decision is simple. Orton VS Braun VS McIntyre, winner takes Lashley on for the title at #WrestleManiaBacklash! A main event finally emerges, and it is MASSIVE! But who gets their shot at the All Mighty?

 

Braun and McIntyre talk backstage.

We all saw what Braun did to Shane, ripping the cage apart and throwing Shane off the top. But this is a Triple Threat tonight. You could go after McIntyre but then Orton would attack from behind. You go after Orton, but then what happens? BOOM, Claymore! Braun knows how a Triple Threat works. You trying to insult his intelligence? You saw how that worked out for Shane, right? The thing is, Braun knows how bad McIntyre wants his rematch. But McIntyre doesn’t get that he’s in Braun’s way of getting that title. That means McIntyre has a monster-sized ass whooping coming. But are they both forgetting that the Viper could strike outta nowhere?

 

Ladies and gentlemen: Elias.

The Drifter and his follower, Jaxson Ryker, are already in the ring as Elias introduces them both. “Now right now, I’d like to take this time to make sure Shane McMahon gets the respect he deserves for his valiant and heroic effort against Braun Strowman at WrestleMania.” In fact, Elias dedicates his once-in-a-lifetime performance to his friend and mentor, Shane O’Mac. But when he strums, a trombone plays? That’s weird. Let’s try again. StruuuUUUUm. What?! Who’s doing that? Lance, are you messing with the sound?! But then “NEW! DAY ROCKS!” Xavier Woods & Kofi Kingston make their entrance!

Kofi has a mic to say, “Whaaat? Whoa~, bruh! Now, I hear you out here forming this makeshift apology to Shane McMahon, but I’m wondering why you’re not apologizing to the entire Raw Tag Team Division for the way that you disgraced it!” YES! Two men, not one but two, a tag team, got your sorry behinds whooped ALL~ over Mania by one man! One Strowman! And you just hate to see it. If something like that happened to them, they’d never show their faces again! But look a their beautiful cherub faces! And no offense, but look at y’all! They should have bags over their heads. You mean to tell Kofi that at the first night with fans was just catching Braun’s hands?! SHAME!

Elias has them stop and says a colossal whopping by one man is the same as when Omos tossed the New Day around to take away their tag titles! How high was Kofi when he was up there? Woods says that what they have here is a failure to communicate. If you think this is a game, it’s not! It’s not about the New Day but about these two! UNACCEPTABLE CONDITION!! But fear not, for ya bois, the NEW~ DAY~, are about to bring all the honor when they whip these two here tonight~! And then you’ll see what a REAL tag team looks like! And do you know why? Do tell. BECAAAAAAAAUSE~! NEW! DAY ROCKS! We find out what it takes to be a tag team, right now!

The New Day VS Elias & Jaxson Ryker!

Woods starts with Ryker, but Ryker CLOBBERS Woods at the bell! Ryker throws heavy hands in a corner, whips Woods corner to corner, but misses in the corner as Woods dodges. Woods dumps Ryker out hard, then mule kicks Elias! Kofi throws Elis out to join Ryker, and the New Day DOUBLE FLY!! Direct hit at the ramp and the former tag team champions are standing tall as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Elias ducks an dodges and BOOTS Woods! Ryker tags in, Woods elbows and whips Elias but Elias reverses and Ryker SPINEBUSTERS! Ryker drops ax handles over and over, rains down fists now, then covers, TWO! Ryker keeps Woods from Kofi, bumps him off buckles and stomps away on him! Elias tags in, whips Ryker in and Ryker splashes Woods! Elias fireman’s carries for a DEATH VALLEY DRIVER! Cover, TWO! Woods survives but Elias drags him up by his hair. Elias talks trash, clamps on a chinlock and grinds Woods down with thrashing. Raw goes picture in picture to plug Nobody, the new hit action film, but Woods fights up to roll up! TWO and Woods CHOPS!

Woods reaches for Kofi, Elias whips him away and CLOBBERS him! Elias is fired up as he drags Woods over. Tag to Ryker, they mug Woods, and Ryker suplexes high and hard! Cover, TWO! Ryker CLUBS Woods, covers again, TWO! Ryker drags Woods up, whips him into the corner but Woods hits Elias! Woods elbows Ryker away, hops up and leaps, but Ryker CLOBBERS him out of the sky! Cover, TWO!! Woods survives, Elias tags in, and Ryker DECKS Kofi! Elias whips Woods to Ryker’s SPINEBUSTER, then Elias SLIDING KNEES Woods down! Cover, TWO!! Woods is not done! Ryker tags in, Elias suplexes Woods to a BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO!!!

Ryker is furious as Woods survives again! Ryker drags Woods back into a thrashing camel clutch! Woods fights up, jawbreakers free, but Ryker keeps him from Kofi with a back suplex. Woods lands o his feet to ENZIGURI! Woods hurries, hot tags to Elias and Kofi !Kofi springboards to rally on Elias! Kofi hits Ryker for good measure, dropkicks Elias down then runs but into Elias’ arms! Kofi sunset flips, Elias rolls through but Kofi STOMPS Elias down! Cover, TWO! Kofi runs for the NEW~ DAY~ Boom Drop! Kofi claps but Ryker gets in, so Kofi DECKS him! Woods WRECKS Ryker, Ryker spins but Elias ducks to Electric Chair lift! Kofi fights free, Woods tags in, Kofi BOOTS Elias!

Kofi gets Elias up, backbreaker! Woods is up top, UP UP DOWN DOWN!! Cover, The New Day wins!

Winners: The New Day, by pinfall

Elias & Ryker brought the fight, and perhaps are worthy of the tag division, but they’re not better than the ELEVEN time champions! Will Woods & Kofi soon get back to those W, W, E, World, Tag, Team, CHAMPIONSHIPS~?!

 

Randy Orton speaks.

“Over the past six months, I have been distracted. But all of that ended last night at WrestleMania.” Orton was distracted by Alexa Bliss and by The Fiend. But those two have simply disappeared, so now Orton can focus on what matters: the WWE World Championship! He has to get through McIntyre and Braun tonight, but the thing is, he only has to strike once because he brings with him the three most dangerous in sports entertainment, R K O! But will Orton be able to strike down the giants in his path to get at the titan who holds the title?

 

Raw presents an all new Firefly Fun House!

Mercy the Buzzard, Huskis the Pig Boy, Abby the Witch, and Ramblin’ Rabbit are all back! And they proudly present the return of BRAAAY WYAAAAT~! YAY~! Hello, Fireflies! It feels so good to be back! Especially with all of his true friends. Abby couldn’t stand that little b**** anyway! Well if you don’t have anything nice to say, Abby, don’t say anything at all. **** that! Witches be wild. But Ramblin’ says this will be so much roomier in here without Alexa! OWIE WOWIE, dude! Mwah! Bet you didn’t see that coming! Bray then throws Ramblin’ away and says that they still have each other!

As a matter of face, Bray feels great! This could be a brand new start! A new season, with new friends and a brand new Bray! In fact, Bray feels reborn! Yeah! Bray heals Huskis and Mercy! And begone, Abby! But that’s right! Everything will be fine because HE will return! No more clout chasing in this simulation! The Fun House will be big, bad, and stwong! See you around~! But will it really be a revival of the Fun House?

 

WWE World Championship Triple Threat: Drew McIntyre VS Braun Strowman VS Randy Orton!

While the Scottish Warrior missed the mark thanks to MVP, the Monster Among Men mangled Shane O’Mac and the Viper avoided disaster against The Fiend. But nothing is done until it is done! Will McIntyre get right back up and right back after the Rocky Mountain Machine? Will McIntyre and Orton #GetTheseHands? Or will the Apex Predator be right back in the title hunt with one swift strike?

Raw returns as Orton makes his entrance to join Braun and McIntyre in the ring. The bell rings and all three men circle while watching the others. McIntyre and Braun fires off, Orton lurks up but backs off as McIntyre glares. Braun puts McIntyre in a corner to hammer away and Orton hangs back. Braun throws body shots, Orton storms in and attacks Braun. Braun choke grips but now McIntyre and Orton work together to go after him! They double suplex Braun up and over! McIntyre looms over Braun, watches him get to a corner and kicks him down! Orton kicks McIntyre, but Braun CLOBBERS them both!

Orton bails out, Braun throws McIntyre out the other side! Braun goes out, the Strowman Express is on the tracks! Braun runs, into STEEL STEPS from McIntyre! Orton BACK SUPLEXES McIntyre to the desk!! The Viper stands tall by taking advantage, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and McIntyre throws knees into Braun. Orton gets up to add on stomps, they mug Braun at the ropes then McIntyre hits a GLASGOW KISS! Braun falls out of the ring, Orton thumbs McIntyre in the eye! Orton kicks low then throws McIntyre by his hair! Orton stomps McIntyre’s leg, then his arm! Orton scrapes McIntyre’s face with his laces, but McIntyre hits back with body shots. Orton knees low, whips, but McIntyre reverses, only for Orton to kick him! McIntyre LARIATS back! And again! McIntyre whips, OVERHEAD suplexes Orton, then clinches him in a corner to OVERHEAD SUPLEX!

Braun return to CLOBBER McIntyre! And SPALSH Orton in a corner! Braun ROCKS Orton, runs but McIntyre dodges! NECKBREAKER! McIntyre looks but Orton is out of the ring, and as McIntyre exits, Orton trips him up! McIntyre hits the apron hard, and staggers into a kick. Orton CHOPS McIntyre against the apron! McIntyre CHOPS back! McIntyre walks into another kick and Orton bumps him off barriers. Orton POSTS McIntyre, then has him at the desk again! Orton bumps McIntyre off the hood, then again! And again! Orton drags McIntyre up to throw OVER the desk! Orton turns around, the STROWMAN EXPRESS gets him!

Braun puts Orton in the ring, drags the steel steps up to SMACK McIntyre into barriers! Braun runs, throws the steps aside, and then goes to the ring to drag Orton onto the apron. Braun CLUBS Orton, goes back for the steps, and as Orton stands, Braun RAMS him! Braun RAMS McIntyre again! Braun roars as he stands over Orton, and then hauls him up by his ears! Braun puts Orton in the ring, but Orton kicks him in the ropes! Orton drags Braun out for a DRAPING DDT!! Orton grins as he hears the voices in his head! Braun slowly stands, Orton stalks up behind him, RKO!! Cover, McIntyre BASEMENT CLAYMORES!! Cover, McIntyre wins!!

Winner: Drew McIntyre, by pinfall (NEW #1 contender to the WWE World Championship)

The Viper may have struck, but McIntyre struck last! Now McIntyre gets a WrestleMania rematch at WrestleMania Backlash! Will the Scottish Warrior regain the title now that he knows what to expect? But MVP comes back out to look at McIntyre. But T-BAR AND MACE are here?!? They get McIntyre for HIGH JUSTICE!!! Retribution is done, but are these two giants now under MVP’s command?!


My Thoughts:

As Raw-After-Mania episodes go, this wasn’t amazing or anything, but it was a good episode overall. It’s great to see the Viking Raiders are back, they have a really good return match with Alexander & Benjamin, and this is going to be good for the Raw Tag Division… And we didn’t see the champs! Where are the champs?! New Day getting on Elias & Ryker for being goobers as a tag team was great, and of course they win the match, but Elias & Ryker looked their best yet. I thought Miz & Morrison were breaking up tonight because of the miscommunication before Miz TV, but them sticking together is also good. While they’re looking like even bigger goobers as a team against Priest, I hope they and New Day give us a match that redeems Miz & Morrison and gets them back into the swing of the tag division.

I am a little concerned about how things went with the Women’s Tag Division tonight, though. First, where’s Reginald? Is WWE just dropping that story because they don’t want it to break the team up? They can still keep the two together and resolve the Reggie story. But I guess Reggie will end up where Vince puts people’s last names, Mustafa Ali’s hacker gimmick, and GTV. Then in the match, I get they want Nia to face some embarrassment to play off of what happened with Mandy at Mania, but her suddenly being clumsy is not it. A mishap backstage/catering? Sure. Another “MY HOLE!” type incident? Yeah! But her pretending to slip on the apron like that was not good. I guess this goes to “WrestleMania Backlash,” but I don’t want a gag to be why Shay-Nia finally lose. A real, awesome match with Mandy & Dana is how they should finally lose.

The Raw Women’s Championship story is a bit skewed right now, too. Rhea VS Asuka in a sudden rematch was a good match, but I don’t know about story. Charlotte having her promo putting everyone on notice right before the match, to then interfere in the match all seems redundant. I feel like Charlotte ambushing the champ and challenger was how she should’ve returned, and then she can talk and explain and be confronted next week. But she’s back, she and Rhea can revisit last year, she and Asuka can revisit many other moments before, and who knows, WrestleMania Backlash might give us a Triple Threat, though that might feel too much like NXT TakeOver: In Your House.

While how The Fiend’s return match ended was a bummer to everyone, I do like Alexa’s explanation. Fiend was gone, the student had surpassed the master, and instead of a Firefly Fun House match with Orton, maybe we get that with Alexa and Bray. They throw their respective pasts, such as the failed gimmicks and awful things they’ve done, in each other’s faces, and only one stands tall as the ultimate supernatural being on Raw. I don’t know what that would mean for the loser, but I think fans would prefer if Bray kept the spooky stuff. Not that Alexa isn’t doing great in this role, but Bray’s been up and down a lot, and WWE taking away what’s working from him yet again would be really rough.

We got a pretty good story for the world title tonight, with Lashley having a great match with Riddle and still winning, and then there being a great Triple Threat to determine a contender. It is odd that whenever Lashley even plans on celebrating, that celebration is denied. When Lashley first got the title off The Miz, the celebration was “canceled” because he gave Miz his rematch and whooped him. Lashley wanted to celebrate tonight, but not only did his emotions get in the way, MVP’s announcement was interrupted by the challengers and Pearce made a match. Will Lashley have to wait until after WrestleMania Backlash to finally have his party? And McIntyre winning the Triple Threat here probably serves two purposes: It keeps Orton and Braun in the back pocket for later; and it probably means McIntyre loses again, in an equally competitive match with Lashley, just to make a point of Lashley’s power.

My Score: 8.3/10


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 3.28.2024

TNA tapings from Philly! Knockouts Number 1 Contender is decided! Rich Swann explains his heel turn and Chris Sabin vs Steve Maclin in the main event!

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Hey, even if Xplosion has been a complete waste of 45 minutes, last week’s iMPACT! showed some promise with this newer direction at least. We’re getting a return of the 8 for 1 match for the Knockouts World Title. So we’ll get a number one contender for Jordynne Grace, apparently Chris Sabin and Steve Maclin have a match, but we get some answers from Rich Swann on his heel turn.

Time to see what else we have going on!

Ratings:

  • 8 for 1 Match: Rosemary, Dani Luna,  Xia Brookside & Steph DeLander vs Havok, Jody Threat, Masha Slamovich & Alisha Edwards: Dani wins via Schoolgirl Roll-Up – **
  • Dani Luna vs Steph DeLander vs Xia Brookside vs Rosemary: Steph wins via TKO – * 1/2
  • Grizzled Young Vets (James Drake & Zack Gibson) vs Cody Deaner: GYV wins via Grit Your Teeth – SQUASH
  • Josh Alexander vs Tracy Williams: Josh wins via C4 Spike – ***1/4
  • Mike Bailey w/Trent Seven vs Eddie Edwards w/Brian Myers & Alisha Edwards: Eddie Edwards wins via Boston Knee Party – *** 1/2
  • Steve Maclin vs Chris Sabin: Maclin wins via KIA – *** 1/2

 

Results:

8 for 1 Match: Rosemary, Dani Luna,  Xia Brookside & Steph DeLander vs Havok, Jody Threat, Masha Slamovich & Alisha Edwards

So this is a random tag pairing, which the winning team than faces each other in a Fatal Four Way for Number One Contender position; that explains why half of Decay and Spitfire are on opposite teams. 

Steph faces off with Havok first but tags out to Rosemary to try and shirk responsibility, but Rosemary and Havok work together to level Steph and then Rosemary tags back out to purposefully bring DeLander back into the match. Havok throws Steph around a bit, even Lish gets in some offense, most notably her Bodyscissors Bulldog, but Steph tags out to Dani, Dani and Masha go after each other and then the match slowly starts to break down.

Dani hits the Rope Assisted Blue Thunder Bomb on Masha for 2, and starts looking for the Luna Landing. Masha slips it and we go into a bit of a locomotion Cradle spot which Dani gets the best of and wins the tag for her team!

Dani Luna vs Steph DeLander vs Xia Brookside vs Rosemary

As the match is getting set up, Masha attacks Dani to wipe her out. So the other three start fighting, Xia charges a corner, gets ole’d and she flies into ASH by Elegance who was seated at ringside because she had cosmetic surgery and couldn’t wrestle. ASH posts Xia, gets banished from ringside by the referee, back in the ring Rosemary does her rise from the dead spot and looks to finish Steph but Matt Cardona comes out of nowhere, hits the Radio Silence, Steph DeLander hits the TKO for the easy 1-2-3.

Steph DeLander is number one contender and Matt Cardona is back! Not a terrible wrinkle. The match barely existed but at least these returns are nice. 

GYV hits the ring to complain about Cody Deaner costing them the match against Time Splitters last week. So they call him out and he’s out in Red and Yellow trailer park Flash attire. Santino apparently is allowing Deaner to pick one of the GYV members to fight. Philly picks both, so Deaner attacks both. 

Grizzled Young Vets (James Drake & Zack Gibson) vs Cody Deaner

Cody gets the best of Drake early but then the GYV work over Deaner a bit early, Gibson starts talking smack and Deaner tries to Hulk Up, and it seemingly works. Combination Punches, Manhattan Drop, Corner Bulldog, tries the Deaner DDT, but Gibson cuts him off with a throat chop.

Drake uses the scarf to take advantage of the referee not looking, and then some Grit Your Teeth gives the GYV a win.

Josh Alexander walks out again to be the Talking Weapon…and yeah, not really a big fan of when he speaks. He’s dressed to wrestle so lets hope its an open challenge or a Philadelphia Drink Off with Sandman showing up…or something. Just not a lot of talking, please. OH GOOD, open challenge. Josh calls out Hammerstone, but he gets some Hot Sauce instead of Hammers.

Josh Alexander vs Tracy Williams

As expected with these two, early World of Sport style open with some chain wrestling into athletic counter wrestling and shrugging off both men’s first attempt at submissions. They both take a beat, then we go into a Chop Battle, Williams slows Josh with a Kitchen Sink, but Josh grabs him in the Vertical Suplex and then spill over the ropes. Josh is back in first, Williams tries to crawl up, eats a strike and then eats Josh’s Low Crossbody spot. So now Josh starts dogwalking Williams around the outside.

Josh throws him back in, drives a knee into his face, but as Williams tries to fight back, Josh stops all of that with a Northern Lights Suplex Hold for 2. Josh goes for a Heel Hook to weaken the ankle for a potential Ankle Lock. So just early joint manipulation and Back Breakers from Josh leaves Williams writhing and absorbing so much…not really fighting back much. Tracy tries a desperation short Headbutt to the gut like he’s Spike Dudley, but it seems to just annoy Josh. A few traded Overhand Chops, C4 Spike attempt but Tracy drops his weight. Josh gets a little arrogant, starts with a few half assed slaps and it allows Tracy to fire a few strike, Back Drop Suplex, drives Josh into the corner and sets up the Avalanche Butterfly Suplex. Tracy goes for a submission but Josh is too close to the ropes.

With all of Williams’ offense, Josh manages to fire through and land an Exploder Suplex to rock Tracy. A few more big moves from Josh, into the Power Breaker seems to give Josh all of the momentum. C4 Spike again, Back Drop counter, Back Elbow and Tracy tries a corner set up but Josh cuts him off and they start fighting on the top. Williams counters the Superplex, DDT into the top corner buckle, Death Valley Driver into an STF, then Crossface but Josh is fighting. Piledriver attempt from Williams, straight right says no, Release German Suplex, straps go down but Tracy kicks Josh in the face. They trade Big Boots, Josh with a Backslide into the C4 Spike for the win!

Both these guys chant kicks up, Josh offers the handshake, they go for the corny Indie respect moment and Hammerstone hits the ring and lays them both out. Hammer puts the head gear on Tracy and throws him into the Torture Rack. 

This might be Ali’s best promo ever.

Mike Bailey w/Trent Seven vs Eddie Edwards w/Brian Myers & Alisha Edwards

I do really like The System’s theme song. 

Eddie goes for the NOAH Chop, Bailey ducks the first one and tries to keep things quick, but Eddie catches him and caves in his chest real quick. Front Kick from Bailey into the Back Handspring that culminates into a Gamengiri, Eddie powders and Speedball goes for the Tope con Hilo. Arm Wringer into a Round Kick to the chest. Bailey breaks the count, eats a chop and then get go into a kicks and chops trading spot. Myers provides enough of a distraction since they’re on the outside so Eddie scoops Bailey and Blue Thunder Bomb on the apron.

Another count reset, this time from Eddie and the Chops continue from Eddie. Eventually Eddie throws Bailey back into the ring, very unceremoniously, drops a knee to the eyes and goes for 3 pinfalls in quick succession. Fingers to the eyes, chops to the chest, Backpack Stunner attempt but Speedball wriggles free and John Woo Dropkick gives him some space. Spinning Back Kick, Axe Kick, Round Kick, Running Shooting Star, for 2! Speedball slaps his chest to try and send a message while he starts lighting up Eddie with about half a dozen Round Kicks to the chest. He then goes for the Lightning Kicks while Eddie is on the ropes, Myers pulls out Eddie, Bailey attempts a dive but puts the brakes on, acts like he’s distracted by Myers but avoid Eddie’s sneak attack. Kick to the face into a Corkscrew Asai Moonsault, back in the ring, Tornado Kick from Bailey, goes for Ultima Weapon but he eats a Gamengiri into the Backpack Stunner for 2!

Both men rise, Chop from Bailey sends him on his ass, and we go back to kicks versus chops. Bailey with the combination kicks, tries the Buzzsaw but Eddie moves, Lariat! Tiger Driver attempt, but Bailey says no, Backflip Knees gives Bailey all the momentum. He tries the Tornado set up, Myers and Alisha get involved but Trent Seven nullifes Myers, Bailey with the Double Clutch Superkick to rock Eddie, he goes back to the Tornado set up but Lish grabs his feet, Bailey fights her off, drops Eddie, goes for Ultima Weapon but misses! Boston Knee Party to the back of Bailey’s head, Eddie wins!

There’s a quick video package for the FBI next week. Not sure if that means we only see Guido, or if Vito and others will show up.

Rich homie Swann and AJ Francis show up and I’m fairly sure he named them “First Class”. They keep saying AJ Francis in the same cadence as AJ Styles, so I get what they’re doing there. And Swann basically says AJ was the only one who cared about how Rich was doing, Hendry just stole his thunder and did nothing. “If you ain’t First Class, you’re last” – Talladega Nights references? Well now.

Steve Maclin vs Chris Sabin

Mostly an uneventful start, a few moments from both men, Sabin speeds things up when he ducks out and baits Maclin to try the Scud Missile, but he outsmarts him by sliding back in. Maclin doesn’t full commit to the dive but does roll out a little hard which gives Sabin the chance to jump on him. Baseball Slide, Wristlock over the ring post, throws him back in and looks for a Grounded Top Wristlock. Sabin acting a bit more like Shelley with the joint focus, but Maclin manages to use the ropes to his advantage and bounce Sabin off of them twice.

Maclin finally has some control, Forearm to the low back, drapes Sabin on the middle rope and drives the knee into the back of his head. Maclin lays in some chops, grounds any of Sabin’s attempts and locks in a Chin Lock. Sabin finally fires up , but Maclin hits the Olympic Slam to stifle Sabin’s attempts. Maclin perches Sabin, tries the Superplex but a few punches and a bite gives Sabin an opening and Sabin connects with the Missile Dropkick. Manhattan Drop into a Crucifix cover for 2, Swinging Neckbreaker causes Maclin to retreat to the corner and Sabin focuses a few Forearms to the back of the head and a Snap DDT.

A few wild swings from Maclin give Sabin a gift, so he goes for the Crossface. Maclin barely rolls tot he ropes to break the hold, powders out and moves out of the way of the Plancha. BUSAIKU KNEE to level Sabin. Jar-Headbutt for a near fall! Maclin Tree of Woes Sabin, Caught in the Crosshairs, Sabin sits up but Maclin knows how to avoid the post. A small back and forth, Mayhem for All and only a 2 count! Jar-Headbutt number two misses, La Magistral for only 2, both collide with lariats and then go into the Fighting Spirit spot. Slugfest but Sabin hits a Sole Butt, Sabin tries to continue but Maclin coldcocks Sabin sending him to the outside, Scud Missile Dive – MISSES! Maclin is laid out on the outside, count out starts, Sabin is back in around 6, Maclin barely beats the 10. Springboard Tornado DDT from Sabin for a near fall!

Cradle Shock attempt, but Maclin fights it off. Sabin jumps, misses, Tree of Woe, Caught in the Crosshairs! Maclin tries the KIA but Sabin turns it into a Wrestler’s Bridge Pinfall for only 2, but Maclin holds on to the arms, connects with the KIA and wins!

 

Overall Score: 7/10

Well aside from the fact the opening match was a little bit of a hectic mess and Kon is still a storyline relevant thing…the better portion of the episode was pretty fun. I didn’t love the allusions to Santino handing out rights to challenge and open challenge vouchers, felt like a weird “authority” figure kind of spin. But when he finally showed up and continued to be the lovable goof, its all good.

Ali had his best promo ever, “Mr Rhinoceros”, was a great way to spin into the conversation with Rhyno. Sabin steering more into Shelley’s bag of tricks and still coming up short is interesting. Steph DeLander with the big return win and bringing Cardona back with her is generally a fun angle. Speedball looked awesome and Hammerstone did a great job looking like a massive douche and executing the best Torture Rack since Lex Luger.

Of course there’s a few gripes, but all in all, it was pretty fun.


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Mitchell’s ROH Results & Report! (3/28/24)

Look who finally decided to show up!

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Kyle Fletcher returns to ROH TV!

The ROH World Television Champion is finally back to defend his title! Will the Aussie Arrow hit Blake Christian through the All Heart?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Athena VS Nikita; Athena wins.
  • Cole Karter & Griff Garrison w/Maria Kanellis VS Kaz Jordan & Victor Castella; Karter & Griff win.
  • Dalton Castle VS Nick Comoroto; Castle wins.
  • Brandon Cutler & Colt Cabana VS Rex Lawless & Bryce Donovan; Cutler & Cabana win.
  • Six Man Tag: Top Flight VS KPK; Top Flight wins.
  • Diamante VS Kiera Hogan; Kiera wins.
  • Evil Uno VS JD Drake; Uno wins.
  • ROH World Television Championship: Kyle Fletcher VS Blake Christian; Fletcher wins and retains the title.

PLAY BY PLAY

Athena VS Nikita!

The Fallen Goddess was stressed out watching Hikaru Shida tune up for Supercard of Honor, so she’s getting back in the ring to work through that. Will Athena prove this is still her show? Or can The Russian Vixxen take advantage of Shida being on Athena’s mind?

The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings, and then Athena rushes in! Nikita dodges to rally with lariats and a SLINGBLADE! The fans rally, Nikita runs in at the corner and she SPLASHES, to then BULLDOG! Athena gets spiked and Nikita gets fired up! Nikita brings Athena up, underhooks, then PEDIGREES! Cover, ONE?!? Athena is tough but Nikita is still surprised. Nikita storms up but is sent into buckles! Nikita stops herself just in time, and she ROCKS Athena! Nikita brings Athena in while she goes up the corner, for a HANGING HEADSCISSOR! The ref counts, Nikita lets off, but Athena gets mad!

Athena DIVES and wipes Nikita out against barriers! Athena is mad now, and she brings Nikita up to THROW her into railing! Athena shouts at Nikita, then wheelbarrows to SWING her into barriers! Athena says you’re welcome and takes a bow, then she goes back for Nikita. Athena puts Nikita in, looms over her while soaking up cheers and jeers, then stalks Nikita as she crawls. Athena hauls Nikita up, CLUBS her again and again, then underhooks for a BUTTERFLY SWING! Athena TOSSES Nikita away, drags her up, and then HALF HATCH SLAMS! Nikita is dazed, but Athena sits her up. Athena ties up the legs and puts on a STANDING CROSSFACE! Nikita taps, Athena wins!

Winner: Athena, by submission

Ahead of crossing swords with the Shining Samurai, the ROH Women’s World Champion is sharpening her edge. As such, she SHOTGUNS Nikita back down! The fans boo as Athena CLUBS away on Nikita! Athena then puts Nikita in the Tree of Woe and lifts her up, to KICK away on Nikita’s back! Athena takes the belt, puts it in front of Nikita’s face, and she trots as she takes aim. But wait! Here comes Shida! The fans fire up as Athena runs away! Shida helps Nikita out of the Tree, then picks up the belt Athena left behind! She even dares Athena to come get it back! Is Shida going to be the one that finally dethrones the Overlord? Or will Athena make sure “forever champion” means forever?

 

Backstage interview with Lee Johnson.

Renee Paquette is here to talk with Big Shotty, and notes his impressive 2024 streak. He asked for this time, so what’s going on? Lee says that he has said it before and he will proudly say it again. He is not here to take part, he is here to take over! And now let him add something else: he is here to take titles! Now, he has heard there’s an ROH World Television Championship match between one champion in Kyle Fletcher and All Heart, Blake Christian. Now, whoever comes out victorious, Lee’s calling his shot! Supercard of Honor, Big Shotty’s got next! Lee is ready to swing for the fences, is he going to get his chance to hit it out of the park?

 

Dalton Castle VS Nick Comoroto!

The Peacock is still in his slump, and not even his substitute Boys are enough. Meanwhile, did the Freak Beast really shave his beard? Then which change will be the more hindering? Castle without Brandon & Brent, or Comoroto with Jacoby Watts?

The Code of Honor is upheld, and in tight quarters, and the bell rings. The fans rally for Castle as he and Comoroto circle. Castle squats low, real low, then he rushes up to collar ‘n’ elbow! Comoroto powers Castle right to a corner, the ref counts, and Comoroto lets off at 4. Comoroto makes the pecs dance and then flicks sweat at Castle. Castle storms right up, and he, uh, “hip” checks Comoroto! Comoroto gives it back! Comoroto smirks but Castle gets those hips moving. Then he hits the low leg takedown! He rolls Comoroto then CLUBS away on him! Comoroto gets free, kicks low, then ROCKS Castle with a haymaker!

Comoroto bumps Castle off buckles then RAMS into him again and again and again! The ref counts, Comoroto whips Castle but Castle reverses to TOSS Comoroto! Comoroto holds on and he manages to skin the cat! A big cat at that, but Castle waistlocks! Comoroto holds onto ropes to stop the lift, then he backs Castle into a corner. Comoroto throws elbows, gets space and comes back, but into a BOOT! Castle runs up, into a LARIAT! The fans rally, Comoroto huffs and puffs and brings Castle up. Comoroto reels Castle in, but Castle Alabama Lifts! Comoroto CLUBS Castle down then shoves him away.

Comoroto swings but Castle blocks to ROCK him first! Castle fires more forearms, but Comoroto shoves him away. Comroto runs up, Castle gets around, BIG GERMAN SUPLEX! The fans fire up, Comoroto staggers to his feet, and into an Alabama Lift! BANGAAAAAA~RANG! Cover, Castle wins!

Winner: Dalton Castle, by pinfall

Comoroto is a big man, so this was a big win for The Peacock! But wait, here comes Taya Valkyrie! And she tells Castle, “How dare you say that we are irresponsible! Yeah, we lost The Boys. But after the short time we had them, I realized how rude and annoying they are! So, I’m glad we lost them! Because they were a couple of BAD boys!” The fans boo but Taya says yeah, she went there! And they probably got it from Castle! Because Castle never loved them! Not like Mommy & Daddy TV loved them! So for that, Castle deserves this! Sneak attack by Johnny TV! MOONLIGHT DRIVE and a SHINING WIZARD!

Johnny rains down fists on Castle, then says they were BAD boys! Castle set a bad example for them! They’re all losers! The fans boo but Mr. & Mrs. TV just stand over Castle to make out! Then they stomp Castle on their way out! Even as he wins matches, will Castle still be lost in life with The Boys lost in the woods of Canada?

 

Mark Briscoe speaks.

“Philadelphia. For #DemBoys, that is the origin of professional wrestling. That’s when we felt it. That’s when we said this is in our soul, man.” Jay himself once said, “This is what we was created to do, man.” Baddest tag team on the planet, almost a quarter century, and BOOM, it gets taken away in a moment. So Mark’s starting over from square one, flying solo. Continental Classic, the game plan was to get on top, and to soar! But his wings were clipped, humbled once again. But there’s this voice inside of him, it’s Jay’s voice, that says, “Don’t worry about that broken wing, son. You was born to fly. With wings like an eagle, we gonna mount up.”

Mark knows Eddie Kingston’s got that same voice inside of him. “Ain’t that some s*it?” Mark knows Eddie’s had the highs and lows, the peaks and valleys, just like Mark. Eddie became the first American Triple Crown Champion, took on all comers defending that, but then lost to the AEW Continental Championship to Kazuchika Okada. Eddie talked to his mentor, Homicide, and agreed that it is time to tap into something from the past. Into that hungry Eddie, that ruthless Eddie, that vicious Eddie. The Eddie with that dog in him! That Pitbull! Every yard has a top dog, but Eddie, you may be ROH World Champion, but Mark’s gonna show you in Philly that MARK is top dog!

April 5th marks 11 years to the day that brother Jay won his first ROH World Championship. And just like he told Mark, time to man up. Eddie, it is time to man up. Philly, it is time to man up! Mark Briscoe VS Eddie Kingston, ROH World Championship, Supercard of Honor, we will man up. But who will be the man that holds up that title at the end of the night?

 

Diamante VS Kiera Hogan!

The Cuban Diamond won big in a Four Corner Survival, and she won in the opening round of the ROH Women’s World Television Championship tournament. Both of those losses only served to fan the flames, and now Kiera wants to turn up the heat! Will Kiera get her lick back? Or does Diamante just have Kiera’s number?

The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings, and the fans rally as the two circle. They tie up, Diamante headlocks, and she grinds the hold. Kiera powers up but can’t power out as Diamante holds tight. Kiera tries again, but Diamante still keeps the headlock on. Kiera throws body shots, powers out again and is free, but Diamante runs her over! Cover, ONE, and the two stand off. The fans rally as the two reset and go again. Kiera headlocks this time, dares Diamante to keep that same energy now, but Diamante grinds her forearm into Kiera’s face. Diamante powers out but Kiera runs her over! “And that’s all, periodt!”

The fans rally as the two reset again. Kiera wants that Miami heat, so the two tie up again. Kiera wrenches an arm, wristlocks, but Diamante rolls, kips up and wrenches back. Diamante wristlocks then hammerlocks, then spins Kiera for a snapmare. Diamante clamps on with a chinlock and she grinds Kiera down. Kiera fights up, pries the hold open, and fans cheer as she wrenches back. Kiera uses the hammerlock to wrangle Diamante, then she bridges over! Diamante endures, so Kiera floats to a facelock. Diamante gator rolls free and wrenches Kiera to a top mounted armlock! Kiera endures and the fans rally again.

Kiera fights up, wrenches and wristlocks, but Diamante goes to ropes. The ref counts, Kiera lets off quickly, and the armbands come off! They tie up, Kiera wrenches and wristlocks. Diamante ROCKS Kiera! Kiera falls, Diamante stomps her, then drags her up to ROCK her again! Diamante ROCKS Kiera one more time, then runs the ropes, but into a BOOT! And ROUNDHOUSE! Cover, TWO! Diamante stays in this and she kicks right back. Diamante whips, Kiera ducks ‘n’ whips to then drop and trip Diamante! Kiera keeps moving, STEP-UP LEG DROP! Cover, TWO! Diamante sputters and goes to a corner but Kiera eggs her on.

Kiera fires forearms now, then whips corner to corner. Diamante hits buckles hard, then Kiera fires up. The fans rally behind her as she runs in, but Diamante drop toeholds her into buckles! Diamante then stomps away on Kiera in the corner! The ref counts, Diamante lets off at 4, and she drags Kiera up to put her against buckles. Diamante stomps some more, then goes corner to corner and back again, HYDRAULIC DROPKICK! Diamante drags Kiera to the cover, TWO! Keira stays in this and Diamante is annoyed. Diamante sits Kiera up and traps an arm before she clamps on, cording hold and SHOULDER CLAW!

Kiera endures this modified cobra twist, and Diamante even grinds her forearm into Kiera’s face. The fans rally as Kiera fights up. Kiera throws body shots, ROCKS Diamante, but Diamante RAMS Kiera into the corner! And RAMS her again! Then CHOPS! Diamante puts Kiera up top, ROCKS her, then ROCKS her again! Diamante climbs up to throw more shots, and then brings her up. The fans rally while Kiera blocks the suplex! Kiera throws body shots, then shoves Diamante away! Diamante comes back, but Kiera MISSILE DROPKICKS her! Diamante tumbles and the fans rally while both women are down.

Kiera pounds the mat to fire up again. She nods as she rises, the fans behind her. Kiera runs up to CLOBBER Diamante! And she CLOBBERS her again! Diamante swings, Kiera blocks to snapmare and “EAT IT!” SUPERKICK! The fans fire up as Kiera goes Around the World to HIP ATTACK! Then side to side, BOOT WASH! Cover, ROPEBREAK!! Diamante gets a bit lucky and Kiera is frustrated. Kiera fireman’s carries but Diamante fights it. Then she CLAWS Kiera’s eyes! CHOP BLOCK! Diamante fires up now, she dragon sleepers, and says goodnight. But Kiera throws knees to say not yet!

Kiera snapmares free, runs up, SUPERKICK! Diamante flounders, Kiera hauls her up, FACE THE MUSIC! Bridging cover, Kiera wins!

Winner: Kiera Hogan, by pinfall

The swinging fisherman neckbreaker punctuates this one, periodt! Kiera wants to be the first in line to face the inaugural ROH Women’s World Television Champion, but just who will it be? The Queen of Guinea, Queen Aminata? Or Athena’s protege, Billie Starkz?

 

BREAKING NEWS for Supercard of Honor!

It’s already a big night with the title matches, including the crowning of the first-ever ROH Women’s World TV Champion, but now even Stardom is getting in on the action! It will be a Six Woman Tag as Mina Shirakawa, Maika & Mei Seira take on Saya Kamitani, Tam Nakano & AZM!

 

Hikaru Shida speaks.

“In AEW, I won Woman’s World title three times, I beat Toni Storm, I beat Saraya, Willow, Anna Jay, almost everyone. I need stimulation! And so do you. Right, Athena? Do you remember the moment we faced each other in the ring last year? I know you’ve been excited! I know fans have been excited! But… the person who has been excited most is me. Excited to beat up the ‘forever champ.’ So, hello, ROH! Be ready for a new era. Because Holy Shida has arrived!” The Shining Samurai is ready, but will she be able to cut down the Fallen Goddess?

 

ROH World Television Championship: Kyle Fletcher VS Blake Christian!

As Supercard of Honor approaches, it is about time the Protostar returned to ROH TV. But will this return be less than triumphant? Or will All Heart be an easy target for the Aussie Arrow?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who heads for Philly!

The Code of Honor is not upheld as Kyle kicks Blake’s hand away, so Blake shakes his own hand. The bell rings, the two circle, and they tie up. Blake wrenches, wristlocks, but Kyle shoots around to waistlock and SLAM! The fans boo but Kyle soaks it up. Blake gets up, he and Kyle reset and circle again. They tie up, Blake waistlocks then headlocks. Kyle powers out and runs Blake over! Kyle flexes to show he’s bulking up, but then Blake blocks a stomp! Blake kips up but Kyle breaks free to ROCK Blake! Things speed up, Blake hurdles, drops down, then DROPKICKS! Blake kips up and dusts himself off and the fans cheer.

Blake says va fa Napoli, Kyle rushes in, but he blocks Blake’s arm-drag. Kyle whips Blake away but Blake handsprings to wheelbarrow, victory roll, and SPLASH 182! Cover, TWO! Kyle gets away to ropes and catches his breath. Blake storms up, wrenches and whips, but Kyle blocks by holding ropes! Blake CLUBS the arm, but Kyle avoids the chop to clothesline Blake up and out! Fans boo as Kyle builds speed, but Blake slides in! Kyle stops the tope and goes back to the apron, only to get a 619! The fans fire up as Blake builds speed, and Blake FOSBURY FLOPS into the EYE OF THE HURRICANE!

The fans are thunderous as Blake gets Kyle up and in. Cover, TWO! Kyle stays in this but Blake stays cool. The fans rally again as Blake aims from a corner. Blake says he’s becoming champ, and he runs in, but into a POP-UP SWINGING SIDE SLAM! Cover, TWO! Blake survives and Kyle is annoyed again. Kyle tastes a bit of blood in his mouth, maybe cut his lip or tongue on his teeth. But he shrugs that off to stalk Blake to ropes. Kyle stands Blake up to CHOP him down! The fans “WOO~!” as Kyle pretends he can’t see where Blake went. Fans want that “One More Time!” and Kyle brings Blake up again.

Kyle has Blake in the corner now, winds up, but Blake dodges the chop to CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! MACHINE GUN CHOP! The fans fire up as Blake runs, but Kyle CLOBBERS Blake! Blake is dazed as Kyle hits an Ospreay level elbow shot. Blake crawls to a corner, Kyle eggs the fans on, and Kyle storms up on Blake. Kyle whips corner to corner, but Blake goes up to handstand! Kyle runs in but Blake BOOTS Kyle, then drops into the DDT!! The fans fire up while Kyle sputters! Kyle finds his way to ropes, comes back, but Blake ELBOWS him! Blake whips, Kyle reverses but Blake goes up and over and dragon sleepers! BACKBREAKER to SCREW HIGH KICK!

Kyle tumbles out, scrambles back up, but Blake goes up and out to APRON SPEAR! Blake just keeps going, and he DIVES! Direct hit with the Low-pe Suicida, and Blake puts Kyle right back in! Blake climbs up, Kyle sits up, into the ALL MACHO ELBOW!! Cover, TWO!!! Kyle survives and shocks everyone! Blake is frustrated, but he refocuses and calls his shot. The fans rally as Blake climbs the corner to the top. But Kyle springs up to SWEEP the legs! Blake hits buckles then falls to the mat! Kyle huffs and puffs and aims from the corner. Kyle runs in, GAMANGIRI! And then suplex, BRAINBUSTER!! Cover, TWO?!?

The fans are thunderous again and Kyle cannot believe it! Kyle drags Blake up, but Blake goes to fireman’s carry! Kyle fires off elbows, reels Blake in and- NO, Blake slips outta the bomb to fireman’s carry! Kyle reaches for ropes so Blake HOTSHOTS him on them! Kyle is stuck up there, so Blake goes up a corner! GUILLOTINE FROG SPLASH!! Blake hurries to get Kyle in, then hurries to the corner! Blake runs, step-up, but Kyle makes it a sunset flip! TWO, Blake sits on it, TWO! Kyle deadlifts Blake into a PILEDRIVER!! Cover, Kyle wins!

Winner: Kyle Fletcher, by pinfall (still ROH World Television Champion)

Kyle pretends he can’t hear all the boos, but he can’t pretend he doesn’t see Lee Johnson walking out on stage! The Aussie Arrow may have hit the bull’s eye tonight, but is he about to get shot down by Big Shotty?


My Thoughts:

 


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