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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (4/5/21)

WrestleMania Week Raw isn’t letting up!

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Coverage Raw 2021

The last Raw before WrestleMania is red hot!

WWE begins WrestleMania WEEK with a Raw packed to the brim! Will Drew McIntyre and Bobby Lashley be rolling into their world title clash of titans?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Xavier Woods w/ Kofi Kingston VS AJ Styles w/ Omos; Woods wins.
  • 2v1 Handicap Match: Elias & Jaxson Ryker VS Braun Strowman; Braun wins.
  • Asuka & Rhea Ripley VS Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler; Jax & Baszler win.
  • Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Cedric Alexander w/ Shelton Benjamin; Lashley wins.
  • Matt Riddle VS Mustafa Ali; Riddle wins.
  • Drew McIntyre VS King Corbin; McIntyre wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Drew McIntyre heads to the ring!

Though he faces the Rocky Mountain Machine at WrestleMania, the Scottish Warrior must make it to WrestleMania, and that’ll be hard with Bobby Lashley throwing others at him. SmackDown’s King Corbin thinks he can cash in on Lashley’s golden offer, but that confrontation will be for later tonight. McIntyre has a mic and says this is the final Raw before Mania. Just five days until WrestleMania night one, and he can’t help but think back to last year and how unique it was. Then fast-forward to now, we’re “back in business” and once again McIntyre is fighting to become WWE Champion.

So much is going through his head. Where to begin? With Corbin? Nah. The All Mighty Lashley, this match is happening. Lashley’s tried to take McIntyre out but it is happening! They’re in for the biggest FIGHT of their lives, and McIntyre can hardly wait. Such similar journeys, really, the two of them. Almost 20 years each, so many ups and downs. What is it that makes them different? “Sacrifice.” How much McIntyre is willing to give up. Lashley’s sacrificed a lot, too, traveling up and down the roads, around the world, missing special moments with the family. But when Lashley goes home, he makes up for lost time. McIntyre never had that luxury.

McIntyre left home at age 22 with one purpose in mind: becoming WWE Champion. Times were hard. There were times he wish he could go home. He remembers sitting ringside when his mother was going through chemo therapy. She told him on Skype that this is Drew’s dream, and if he comes home, she’d kick his ass herself. “Keep pushing forward. Keep sacrificing.” McIntyre did, he kept going, he gave everything to this industry! He got fired, kept going, came back, rose up and became WWE Champion! He fell off Cells, ladders, through Extreme Rules, kept sacrificing! How can Lashley beat a man who is willing to sacrifice everything?! He can’t.

McIntyre promises to run through Corbin tonight, then put a boot through Lashley’s eyes, take the title and END the All Mighty Era! But speaking of, here come Bobby Lashley and MVP! “Are you done yet, Drew?” McIntyre just goes on and on about last year. It took Drew 17 years to get here, but it took Lashley 16. There can only be one man on top. McIntyre’s time is over, and now it’s All Mighty Time. And what’s worse is that everyone is so scared of the Scottish Warrior, but Lashley saw something in McIntyre’s eyes. McIntyre is the one afraid! Lashley got McIntyre in the Hurt Lock and felt him shake, shiver, then fade out. And that’ll happen again at Mania!

Such big words! McIntyre wasn’t afraid, he just went out. But if Lashley wants to talk tough, he sent everyone after him, needed help- Lashley doesn’t need help! Did you see what he did to Shelton Benjamin? Now watch what happens to Cedric Alexander. McIntyre says who cares about waiting, let’s just do this now! MVP says that’s not how this works! WrestleMania Saturday is when this happens, and we all know right where McIntyre will be: the center of the ring, with the All Mighty, where McIntyre will lose his dignity, lose consciousness, and ultimately lose the match.

Well putting it that way, then okay, nevermind. McIntyre’s speech was nothing. Maybe he’ll be an Uber driver, an Amazon driver, or just say “Screw that” and run Lashley down! Lashley and McIntyre shout at each other, but MVP shouts over them both. This is a lot of tough talk, considering McIntyre might not even make it to Mania. Because here comes Corbin! The Wolf King tells McIntyre that he agrees with MVP. McIntyre won’t even make it to Mania so why worry about it? Corbin started something last week, and looks to finish it now! There is NO WrestleMania for McIntyre! There is NO WWE World Championship for him! Tonight, Corbin whoops McIntyre’s “punk ass!” The tough talk continues from all over, but who will be standing when it’s all over?

 

Xavier Woods w/ Kofi Kingston VS AJ Styles w/ Omos!

Don’t worry, this isn’t a replay, it’s a rematch! The Phenomenal One’s colossal tag partner interfered and disqualified the match last week, so now Woods and Styles go another round! Will Styles take care of this himself this week? Or will Woods get that singles series sweep before the Raw Tag Team Championship match at WrestleMania?

Before making their entrance, New Day come across Matt Riddle on his scooter. Riddle wants to say that it was messed up what Omos did last week. His power level must be WAY over 9000. And Riddle is pretty sure he’s never seen someone get as high as Kofi. But bro, Omos’ first match ever is this weekend, but do you think he can get both of them that high? Let’s hope no one gets that high this weekend. But in fact, ya bois the NEW~ DAY~ will get down when they retain their W, W, E, Raw, Tag, Team, Championships~! But Riddle has his own match with Sheamus, after getting through Mustafa Ali tonight. How’s Riddle feeling?

Well, Sheamus is a little more diesel and stinky, so he’ll be good, but Ali is more sticky, so Riddle will have to grind him down before he can break him down, know what he’s saying? But Riddle’s off to get ready. Good luck, Woods! Woods and Kofi both wonder if Riddle was talking about what they think he was talking about. Kofi is pretty sure he’s got a craving for some milk ‘n’ cookies right now… But enough about that, the New Day makes their entrance! Will they and Riddle all smoke the competition tonight?

The bell rings, Woods and Styles circle and tie up, but Styles throat chops! Styles fires off haymakers in a corner, whips Woods to ropes then hits a big hip toss! Omos and Styles are both fired up, and Styles brings Woods up. Woods fires off hands in return, but Styles shoves him then rolls him for the CALF CRUSHER! Woods is caught already, Omos likes what he sees, but Woods reaches! Kofi talks trash on Omos and then throws the mic at him! IT just bounces off!! Omos storms after Kofi into the ring, and Styles lets off of Woods! Styles chases Kofi out, Omos gets on the apron and the ref is distracted. Woods rolls Styles up with a cradle, Woods wins!!

Winner: Xavier Woods, by pinfall

GOTTEE! Turnabout is fair play, and the New Day are fired up! Will they use Omos’ inexperience against him and Styles to stay golden?

 

A Bugatti rolls up.

It’s Bad Bunny and Damian Priest! They’re rolling into Raw in style, but will they be all business this close to the Most Must-See Showdown at WrestleMania?

 

BRAAAUN~ is here!

Ahead of his Steel Cage match with the mocking and arrogant Shane McMahon, the Monster Among Men has a cage set up with the ring. Shane miscalculated when he let Braun choose the stipulation, and Braun paces about inside. “My whole life, I’ve had to deal with guys like Shane McMahon.” People would bully Braun for his size when they don’t know who he is, what he’s about. Shane tries to make stupid jokes to get under Braun’s skin, but Shane doesn’t get it. Shane doesn’t know what he’s gotten himself into. Shane can run his mouth all he wants, but when the cage door closes, “the running ends.” He’ll be locked inside with Braun.

And Braun won’t just whoop Shane’s ass for himself, but for everyone who has ever been made fun of for being stupid, and told that they would never make something of themselves! Braun is fighting for himself and for every one of them! There’s no goods, no running, no hiding, and no games! Shane will be inside a steel cage with the Monster Among Men! “At WrestleMania, Shane, at the end of our match on Saturday, while your corpse lays in the middle of this ring after I’ve ping-ponged it around this entire cage, and I rub your face into this metal and give you a taste of the agony that it puts on people’s souls being called ‘stupid,'” the last thing Shane hears won’t be “here comes the money.” It’ll be “here comes the body bag!” At WrestleMania, Shane will #GetTheseHands!

But speaking of, here comes Shane O’Mac, not at all afraid of Braun. So much anger, Braun. What did Shane ever do to him? And when Shane gave Braun the chance to choose the match, it was a test to see how far Braun’s intellect has come since grade school. But honestly, a steel cage at WrestleMania? That choice was not that stupid. On paper, people think this favors Braun. And it would, if Shane was any other man. But he is a McMahon, and he will outwit, outmaneuver and defeat Braun. And then the next morning, when Braun wakes up and look sin the mirror, he’ll say to himself, “Boy, I am stupid…”

2v1 Handicap Match: Elias & Jaxson Ryker w/ Shane McMahon VS Braun Strowman!

The Drifter and his follower appear to fight on Shane’s behalf days before WrestleMania! And perhaps thanks to Shane’s authority, there will be NO tags needed! Will Elias & Ryker soften up Strowman so Shane will have a fighting chance?

Raw returns and the bell rings, Shane watching from a very safe distance. Braun grabs Ryker but Elias attacks, only for Braun to throw him off. Braun ROCKS Elias with an uppercut, then ROCKS Ryker with a haymaker, to then SHOVE Ryker out of the ring! Braun powers Elias to a corner, clubs away on him, then stalks him as he scrambles. Braun scoops but Ryker saves Elias to RAM into him! Elias KNEES Braun in the head! Braun is against the ropes, Ryker CLOBBERS him with double ax handles! Ryker & Elias hit a DOUBLE BACK SUPLEX! Ryker drops ax handles, then he and Elias stomp him together!

Elias gets the legs, drags Braun around, rains down rights, and Ryker climbs up. Ryker leaps for a DIVING HEADBUTT! Elias hurries up top while Ryker holds Braun down! Elias hits the MACHO ELBOW! Double cover, TWO!! Braun launches the two but Shane creeps closer. Ryker and Elias stomp away, hammer Braun down, and Shane takes his jacket off. Elias and Ryker throw hands, but Braun explodes out! Shane hurries away as fast as he can! Braun glares at Shane, then kicks Ryker. Braun sends Elias into Ryker and then SPLASHES them both! Braun CLUBS Elias in the chest, scoops Ryker, and hits the MONSTER SLAM!

Elias staggers into a scoop, and he gets a MONSTER SLAM! Braun covers both men, and wins!

Winner: Braun Strowman, by pinfall

The Monster just mangled two men at once! Shane thinks he still has the upper hand, but will he be broken at the hands of Braun Strowman?

 

Backstage interview with The Miz & John Morrison.

Kevin Patrick says he wants to ask about their match this Saturday with Bad Bunny, but then notices they have paint cans. Oh, these? Kevin acts like this is odd, but no. They’re artists! You heard of Hey Hey, Hop Hop, but they’re more than just musical artists. Painters such as Van Gogh, Monet, and now Miz ‘n’ Morrison. They have a masterpiece to create, using Bunny’s Bugatti!?! Morrison feels bad, this is a $3.6 MILLION car! But there’s a scratch! This is matching paint! In that case, let’s paint! Wait, that’ snot matching, it’s RED on a WHITE car! They write, “Hey Hey, Hop Hop” and then doodle bunnies and then write their names, too!

Miz does finger-painting like his daughters love! This is so good, right? $3.6 MILLION. Imagine what it’s worth now, right? PRICELESS! But will Bunny & Priest make the Hollywood A-Lister and Guru of Greatness pay for this?

 

Bad Bunny is furious backstage.

He storms his way back to see the vandalism with his own eyes! Now he’s even angrier! But then Miz BLINDSIDES him! Morrison gets Bunny up and the two mug Bunny, before they throw him into the hood of another car! “This is what happens when you disrespect us! This is what happens when you play with us!” Miz drags Bunny by his hair and says he doesn’t respect Bunny! He’ll run Bunny at Mania just like he ruined the car! WWE officials chase Miz & Morrison off, Priest hurries over and asks what happened. Priest realizes just who it was, Pearce shouts for a medic. They check Bunny, but will Priest make sure Miz & Morrison are the ones who’ll need a hospital?

 

BREAKING NEWS for WrestleMania!

After the chaotic brawl on last Friday Night SmackDown, there will be two major matches in regards to the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships! First, on Saturday, it will be a Tag Team Turmoil, Naomi & Lana VS Dana Brooke & Mandy VS The Riott Squad VS Natalya & Tamina! The winner goes on to Sunday to face Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler for the titles!

 

Asuka & Rhea Ripley VS Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler w/ Reginald!

The Empress of Tomorrow and Aussie Nightmare are going to clash at WrestleMania, but it was the challenger who chose to accept the challenge from the WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions! Is Rhea going to use the Irresistible Force and Queen of Spades to soften the Raw Women’s Champion up? Or is she planning on using Nia & Shayna to show Asuka what she’s in for?

Raw shares backstage interview footage from earlier tonight. How does Rhea plan on coexisting with Asuka tonight after flipping a table onto her last week? Rhea says she won’t share a thing about her strategies. But the question is, what about Asuka? And coexisting is a given since they’re up against Nia & Shayna. Asuka will just have to wait to rip into Rhea this Sunday at Mania. With that, Rhea makes her entrance to join Asuka. Will there be coexistence or mutually assured destruction when Raw returns from the break?

Raw returns and the tag team champions make their entrances, Reggie still following Nia. But Shayna tells him to stay way behind them. The teams sort out, Shayna starts against Asuka and the two circle. They tie up, Shayna gets an arm and wrenches but Asuka wrenches through to wristlock then headlock. Shayna endures the grind, powers out, but Asuka rams her with a shoulder! They both stay up so they start shoving. Shayna mocks Asuka for losing a tooth, then runs. Shayna gets around Asuka to shove but Asuka runs Shayna over! Asuka stands on Shayna’s head to pull on the arm, then wrenches the arm to yank!

Asuka reaches over, but Rhea doesn’t want to tag! Shayna ROCKS Asuka, now Rhea tags in. Rhea circles with Shayna, they tie up, and Shayna waistlocks. Rhea switches, Shayna blocks the lift, and then wrenches free. Rhea scoops and TOSSES Shayna away! Nia tags in, and Rhea smiles as she welcomes the challenge. Nia shoves, Rhea fires off haymakers! Rhea goes to scoop but Nia fights that off to scoop instead! Rhea slips off, and tags Asuka in with a pat on the head! Asuka is upset more about the way she tagged, but goes in after Nia! Nia shoves her away, fireman’s carries, but Asuka slips off to back kick! Asuka tilt-o-whirls to the IRON OCTOPUS!

Nia endures, stays up and powers out to run Asuka over! Cover, TWO! Asuka survives but Nia drags her up. Nia shoves Asuka to a corner, runs in and splashes! Asuka flops down, crawls, but Nia looms over her. Nia pushes Asuka, Asuka hits back, but Nia drags Asuka up to whip her to a corner. Asuka dodges and Nia hits buckles, then turns around into the CODE BREAKER! Hot tags to Rhea and Shayna! Rhea dodges Shayna and BOOTS her down! Rhea DECKS Nia, Reggie distracts but gets caught! Shayna CHOP BLOCKS Rhea’s leg out! Shayna tags Nia, and Nia brings Rhea to the announce desk, just to RAM Rhea into apron! Rhea writhes as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again and Shayna keeps Rhea down by standing on a leg, then she STOMPS the ankle! Rhea writhes and even Asuka feels that pain. Shayna kicks Rhea’s leg, then drags her to a cover, ONE! Nia is annoyed, tags in, and the champions work together to whip, scoop and SLAM Rhea down! Nia runs to drop an elbow! Cover, TWO! Asuka coaches Rhea but Nia drags Rhea over to tag Shayna. They mug Rhea in the corner, Shayna snapmares Rhea to KICK her in the back! Cover, TWO! Shayna drags Rhea by her leg to HEEL HOOK! Rhea endures as Shayna twists the foot around! Rhea fights and kicks with her free leg! Shayna drops an elbow on the bad leg over and over!

Shayna stands on the leg again, drags Rhea away, and tags in Nia. Nia stands on Rhea’s leg now and has a standing toehold! Rhea endures her leg being bent and she swats at Nia, only for Nia to drop a leg on the leg! Nia looms over Rhea as she crawls, then drags her up into a seated cobra clutch! Rhea fights up, fights free with her free arm, and kicks Nia’s legs out to then basement dropkick! Both women crawl, hot tags to Asuka and Shayna! Asuka dropkicks Shayna, dodges Nia and ROUNDHOUSES her! Asuka hits a hip attack on Shayna, then one on Nia! ROUNDHOUSE for Shayna! And a SNAP GERMAN! Asuka runs to SLIDING WIZARD! Cover, TWO!!

Asuka stays fired up and she heads up top! But Rhea SHOVES Asuka down?! Rhea doesn’t care about this tag match anymore, she’s just going to destroy her Mania opponent with an atomic FACEBUSTER! Rhea feeds Asuka to Shayna and Shayna hits a KNEE! Cover, the tag champs win!!

Winners: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler, by pinfall

The Nightmare shouts, “I’m not ready for what?!” Asuka fell for Rhea’s trap, but will she get even at WrestleMania? Or will the Riptide dethrone the Empress on the Grandest Stage of Them All?

 

Cedric Alexander finds MVP backstage.

MVP asks what he’s doing, and it better not be to beg to get back in. Alexander grabs MVP by his collar, and Benjamin walks over to say he better listen. Alexander tells MVP that his greed will cost him. Last week, MVP had the audacity to tell these two they were an embarrassment! That they’re incompetent! MVP is a parasite who needed the Hurt Business to hold him up now that he’s a “crippled, past-up has-been.” Alexander may not win tonight, but he’ll give Lashley a scar he’ll remember him by. And Alexander will be watching as McIntyre defeats Lashley and exposes MVP for the fraud he is. Alexander lets MVP go, and Benjamin straightens his suit for him. Benjamin looks at the THB necklace they got MVP, and tells him to keep his “crippled ass” out of the ring.

Sarah comes by to ask if MVP is at all concerned about Lashley’s match coming up tonight. No, MVP is never concerned for Lashley. MVP is disappointed in “the arrogant, ungrateful attitude” that Alexander & Benjamin are showing. Let’s not forget that it’s because of MVP that they became tag team champions, have the fancy suits and are even relevant again! Before MVP, Alexander had never been to a five-star steakhouse. Lashley walks over and asks what happened, but MVP say sit’s fine. Lashley vows to break Alexander in half! Will there be anything left of #PRIMED after tonight?

 

Backstage interview with Nia, Shayna & Reggie.

Congrats on tonight’s win, but are they confident about their title defense at WrestleMania against the Tag Team Turmoil winner? Does Sarah need a drink of water after the longest question ever? Of COURSE these two are confident! So dumb! But The Ravishing Glow, Lana & Naomi walk over and say they can think of a few reasons why the champs should be worried. Oh, right, because these two are really scary. But then Dana & Mandy walk over and ask, “What about us?” What about you? But then SmackDown’s Tamina & Natty storm in! They don’t even go here! Why- But now the Riott Squad gets in on this! Wait, wait, Billie Kay wants in. Does she even have a partner? Carmella is reviewing her resumé so…

NO! All of you have a match on Saturday. The winner faces the champs on Sunday. They don’t have time for this. They head out to let their contenders argue. Who rises up to challenge the Irresistible Force & Queen of Spades on the Grandest Stage of Them All?

 

Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Cedric Alexander w/ Shelton Benjamin!

We just saw Alexander get in the face of Montel Vontavius Porter and Lashley not take that lightly. Will the Rocky Mountain Machine pulverize PRIMED as an example to McIntyre?

Raw returns again and the former Hurt Business members are already ringside. MVP is on commentary, Benjamin is in Alexander’s corner, but then he sneaks in to attack Lashley! Benjamin and Alexander mug Lashley 2v1 and the match isn’t even underway! MVP doesn’t mind, he just talks old times with Samoa Joe. Lashley fights back but the 2v1 continues! Lashley shoves Benjamin away, DECKS Alexander and then throws knees on Benjamin! Lashley throws the Gold Standard out and MVP says that’s why he wasn’t worried. The bell rings and now Alexander is 1v1 with Lashley. Alexander throws hands but Lashley DECKS him, then scoop SLAMS him!

Lashley talks trash, bumps Alexander off buckles and RAMS into him over an dover! The ref counts, Lashley brings Alexander out for a NECKBREAKER! Lashley glares at Benjamin on the outside before he drags Alexander up to TOSS him! Lashley paces, drags Alexander up and TOSSES him the other way! Lashley drags Alexander up throws him out and Benjamin checks on him. The ref starts a ring count, Lashley paces but Benjamin gets Alexander up. The count is 6 of 10, Alexander hobbles but Lashley pursues. Alexander gets in and jumps on Lashley as he returns, only for Lashley to TOSS him again! Alexander sputters to a corner, Lashley runs in and RAMS into him!

Lashley drags Alexander around, suplexes and holds him up to SLAM him down! Lashley still glares at Benjamin, then tells MVP this is it. Alexander gets to the apron but Lashley hauls him up to ROCK him! Lashley drags Alexander in just to throw him back out! Then Lashley goes out and grins as he drags Alexander back up. Lashley fireman’s carries Alexander to POST him!! Alexander is down again and Lashley roars as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again, and Lashley leans on Alexander in a neck wrench. Alexander throws hands from below but Lashley just digs his knuckles into Alexander’s head! Alexander fights up but Lashley ROCKS him with a right! Alexander back kicks then front kicks then dropkicks! Lashley stays up and gets Alexander for a COMPLETE SHOT! Lashley grows annoyed with Alexander and drags him up to throw him out again! Lashley goes back out, glares at Benjamin, then drags Alexander up to fireman’s carry again. But Benjamin saves Alexander from another post shot! Lashley storms after Benjamin but Alexander sends Lashley into the steps!

Alexander gets in the ring, builds speed and DIVES! Direct hit and Lashley hits barriers! Alexander keeps going to DIVE again! Another hit and another collision with barriers! Lashley shoves Alexander into the ring but Alexander handsprings for the NEURALIZER! Alexander runs in but is put on the apron, but he ENZIGURIS back! Alexander climbs, leaps, missile dropkick! Cover, ONE?!! Alexander is shocked but MVP says he’s still confident in Lashley. Alexander clubs away on Lashley’s back, but Lashley shoves him away. Alexander ends up on the apron, he BOOTS back then steps in, but into a ALL MIGHTY SPINEBUSTER!

Lashley roars again, drags Alexander back up, and gut wrenches to the DOMINATOR!! Lashley isn’t done there, he stalks Alexander as he stirs. Benjamin wants Lashley to stop but MVP mocks Benjamin with the begging and pleading. Lashley says it’ll stop, with this! A whip and another ALL MIGHTY SPINEBUSTER!! And then the HURT LOCK!! Alexander is out, Lashley wins!

Winner: Bobby Lashley, by submission

Benjamin attacks Lashley to get him off Alexander! Lashley catches Benjamin for a COMPLETE SHOT! Lashley stands tall as MVP says emotions cloud judgment. Lashley puts Benjamin in the HURT LOCK! MVP says this is all business, not personal, but Lashley sure seems to have a lot of rage. Will that same rage wreck McIntyre at WrestleMania?

 

Priest talks with Bunny backstage.

Priest and Bunny are going to address what Miz and Morrison did to the Bugatti, but will they be able to keep their cool this close to WrestleMania?

 

Bad Bunny & Damian Priest go to the ring!

Priest says Miz & Morrison crossed a line! It’s just because Bunny is a Grammy award winning, record smashing entertainment icon while they’re just yesterday’s news. Miz is so obsessed with Bunny that he couldn’t hold the WWE Championship for more than one week. If Miz & Morrison thought Priest & Bunny clowning them before was bad, they haven’t seen anything yet! It’s easy to beat someone down 2v1, so at WrestleMania, Priest wants to even the odds! Let’s make this a full tag team match, 2v2, Miz & Morrison VS Bunny & Priest! Bunny adds that, “I just came here, following my dreams, believing in my dreams, because i love this business. I love and respect every superstar.”

But Bunny remembers when he used to watch Raw, SmackDown and all the PPV’s with his dad and brothers and friends, the whole family. Bunny has a lot of good memories with the WWE, but now… Now Bunny isn’t sure how to feel. He isn’t what to think with this experience. Bunny came here to perform, to do a job, and is happy to have performed his song for Booker T! He loves and respects Booker, just like he does HHH, Stone Cold, the Undertaker, Ric Flair, ALL the legends! He even used to respect The Miz. But Miz doesn’t respect Bunny back, and didn’t from day one. And for no reason! Yes, Bunny did what he did, he isn’t a pro-wrestler, but he’s still man.

Miz broke Bunny’s TV set, he disrespected his DJ who is like a brother, and disrespected Bunny’s career, music and fans! For no reason! Bunny did jump from the top rope at the Royal Rumble, but c’mon! If even fans get that wouldn’t they do what Bunny did given a chance? Bunny translates all this to Spanish, and then says that’s no reason to attack someone with a guitar, paint his car. Who does the Miz think he is? Miz is a legend, Bunny respects that, but Miz doesn’t respect Bunny. “You crossed the line, bro.” Bunny doesn’t know why, and now he doesn’t care. This Saturday, WrestleMania, Bunny will show Miz to respect him as he shuts Miz’s mouth and whips his ass! You know where these two are from!? Bunny says that he will make Miz his bitch!!

Miz and Morrison mockingly applaud the “performance,” but it’s no Hey Hey, Hop Hop. Miz will make this clear: Bunny doesn’t belong here! WWE is THEIR world, Bunny’s overstayed his welcome. Miz promises to embarrass and hurt Bunny so that he’ll go crawling home. They accept the tag team challenge! Now, forget about the Bugatti, this stretch limousine is priceless. Miz and Morrison drive off, but they’ll have no choice but to face a furious Bunny and Archer of Infamy! Will Bunny & Priest #LiveForever when they defeat two of the best at the Showcase of the Immortals?

 

Sheamus talks with Mustafa Ali backstage.

The Fella knows he’s on his way to his match with The Bro, but there’s something he needs to know. Ali says there’s no need. “That space cadet represents everything that I want to change about Monday Night Raw.” Riddle killed Retribution and Ali isn’t US Champion! Sheamus has his match at Mania, but tonight, Ali owns Riddle! Sheamus tells Ali to relax. Sheamus and Ali don’t have much in common but there is one thing: their complete and utter dislike of the burnout holding onto the US Championship. Sheamus will be ringside rooting for Ali from commentary! But then Riddle flies through with the scooter! Will Ali bring Riddle back down from his high going into Mania?

Matt Riddle VS Mustafa Ali!

Raw returns as Ali makes his entrance. Sheamus also makes his entrance to go to commentary, and get in Riddle’s head. The bell rings, Ali and Riddle circle, and Riddle goes for a leg. Ali holds him off to get a headlock, but Riddle powers out. They tie up with a test of strength, Ali stands on a hand and wrenches the other. Riddle rolls, drags Ali into a Triangle Hold! ALi makes it a cover, TWO! Ali shoots in to waistlock but Riddle switches. Ali switches, Riddle gets an arm but Ali pulls hair. The ref counts, Ali lets off but ROCKS Riddle in the corner. Riddle tackles Ali, Ali kick shim away but runs into a GUT WRENCH! Riddle drags Ali up but ALi rolls Riddle up, TWO!

Sheamus gets annoyed already but Ali headlocks. Riddle powers out, but Ali dropkicks back! Cover, TWO! Ali clamps right on with a chinlock, but Riddle fights up. Riddle powers up but Ali throws a hand! Ali runs but Riddle tosses him up and out! Riddle then goes to the apron for a PENALTY KICK! Ali is down, Riddle drags him up and puts him in. Riddle takes Sheamus’ hat to put it on and mock Sheamus. But Ali returns to Russian Leg Sweep Riddle to the floor! Sheamus says that’s what Riddle gets, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Ali fires off on Riddle in a corner! The ref counts, Ali lets off but digs his boots into Riddle. Ali lets off again, then comes back to do it again. But Riddle fights up as he holds onto the boot, and he sweeps the leg! Riddle fires off fast hands, Ali shoves and ducks a kick to shove Riddle to ropes. Riddle sunset flips, Ali rolls through to stomp Riddle’s foot! Ali aims from a corner and runs to KICK Riddle in the side! Cover, TWO! Riddle still gasps and sputters but Ali drags him up into a body scissor squeeze! Riddle endures, Ali says Riddle doesn’t deserve the US title, but Riddle fights to get up. Ali is a backpack as Riddle RAMS him into buckles! And more buckles!

Riddle runs to BACKPACK BROTON! Both men are down, but Riddle gets to a corner. Riddle runs at Ali to rally with kicks and forearms, then spins Ali for a PELE! Riddle kips up and forearm smashes! Riddle goes side to side to forearm again! BROSPLODER! Kip up and Ali ducks the kick, dodges the moonsault, but the BROTON hits! Sheamus gets frustrated with Ali, but ALi catches Riddle to a KOJI KLUTCH! Ali calls it #LightsOut, but Riddle moves around and slips out to DEADLIFT FISHERMAN BUSTER!! Cover, TWO!! TRIANGLE! Riddle has Ali now, but Ali scrambles to the ropebreak! Riddle lets off and Sheamus is annoyed.

Sheamus admits, Riddle is great in the ring, but Sheamus is better. Ali throws Riddle into ropes! ALi spins Riddle around to suplex and GUTBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Riddle survives and Ali is furious! Ali shouts that Riddle is still unworthy, and he SLAPS Riddle around! Riddle boots, runs in but Ali elbows! Ali goes up and leaps, but the tornado is blocked! Riddle glares at Sheamus scoops Ali for the BRO DEREK!! Cover, Riddle wins!

Winner: Matt Riddle, by pinfall

Sheamus is furious but Riddle stares him down! WrestleMania, The Bro VS The Fella, only ONE leaves United States Champion!

 

Backstage interview with Drew McIntyre.

Is he threatened by Corbin’s desire to still take Lashley up on the offer and take McIntyre’s place at WrestleMania? “Heavy is the head that wears the crown.” You’d think someone with a giant melon head like Corbin’s would have a bigger brain so that he’d realize it’s foolish to go after McIntyre right before Mania and the world championship match. But McIntyre gets it. These are huge stakes. Corbin can take McIntyre out to take his spot in a Mania main event. McIntyre could say all sorts of horrible things about Corbin, but the truth is, Corbin’s big, dangerous and even in a normal match, will do whatever it takes to get the job done. With these stakes, he’d step on his own grandma to win.

But McIntyre says he’ll do the same as every time: Claymore to the eyes, straight through to Mania, him and Lashley, a date with destiny and McIntyre takes the title back! Will the Scottish Warrior slay the Wolf King before doing even worse to the Rocky Mountain Machine?

 

Drew McIntyre VS King Corbin!

In the main event of the last Raw before WrestleMania 37’s epic weekend event, this could be what makes or breaks the coming clash between McIntyre and Lashley! Will Corbin remove and replace McIntyre from the Showcase of the Immortals? Or will he just help sharpen the Claymore for when it aims at the All Mighty?

Sarah interviews Lashley backstage if a change in the main event changes how he’ll feel about the match? Well, there’s a huge “if” on whether McIntyre survives. McIntyre said he’d give Lashley an all mighty ass whooping, but that won’t be possible once he puts McIntyre in the Hurt Lock and puts him to sleep! Lashley is watching this main event closely, but Raw goes to break!

Raw returns once more and MVP has joined commentary on behalf of Lashley. The bell rings and the two tie up. Corbin powers McIntyre to ropes but McIntyre turns it around, only for the two of them to go all around the ring. They separate, and both men acknowledge the other’s strength. They tie up again, are in a deadlock now, but Corbin gests around to waistlock. McIntyre pries at the hold but Corbin headlocks him. McIntyre powers out, Corbin runs him over, but McIntyre gets right up. Corbin talks a little smack, MVP mockingly asks if McIntyre is alright, and McIntyre ties up to get a waistlock. McIntyre gets a half nelson, then shifts through to a cravat, then a headlock.

Corbin endures the grind, but can’t power out as McIntyre holds tight! Lashley is still watching as Corbin powers McIntyre to ropes. McIntyre lets go but Corbin throws a cheap shot! Corbin runs but McIntyre follows to run Corbin over! Corbin bails out and McIntyre grins. McIntyre wants MVP to be taking notes for Lashley while Corbin paces. Corbin gets back in, ties up with McIntyre and puts him in a corner. Corbin throws haymakers and body shots, then argues with the ref. McIntyre ROCKS Corbin with haymakers in return! McIntyre whips, runs Corbin over with an elbow then covers, ONE!! Corbin surprises McIntyre just a bit but McIntyre stomps Corbin’s hand!

McIntyre hauls Corbin up, snap suplexes him, then covers, TWO! Corbin took a little longer that time but McIntyre is focused. McIntyre drags Corbin up, CHOPS him, then throws hands in a corner. McIntyre whips corner to corner, Corbin reverses and runs in, but has to slide out. Corbin slides in to LARIAT! Cover, ONE!! Now McIntyre surprises Corbin, but Corbin puts McIntyre on ropes to choke him! The ref counts, Corbin lets off, and Corbin looms over McIntyre in a corner. Corbin digs his boots in, the ref counts and Corbin lets off. Corbin rains down rights, then stomps, but the ref counts. Corbin stops and stalks McIntyre around the ring.

Corbin whips McIntyre corner to corner hard and McIntyre bounces off buckles! Corbin smirks and MVP likes what he sees. Corbin looms over McIntyre and MVP tells Corbin to finish it! Corbin talks some trash, drags McIntyre up and back suplexes for a SLAM! Cover, TWO! McIntyre grits his teeth, Corbin brings him up and whips him corner to corner, but McIntyre comes back to rally with clotheslines! McIntyre whips, then OVERHEAD SUPLEXES Corbin! Then clinches for another OVERHEAD SUPLEX! Corbin swings but into McIntyre’s NECKBREAKER! McIntyre kips up, fires up, and glares at MVP. MVP mockingly asks how it’s going.

McIntyre aims as Corbin rises, and kicks low to underhook the arms! Corbin scrambles to deny Future Shock, then bails out. McIntyre pursues but Corbin trips him on the apron! Corbin whips but McIntyre reverses to POST Corbin! McIntyre then whips Corbin into steel steps! McIntyre has a wild look in his eyes as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns once again as McIntyre fires off on Corbin in a corner! The ref counts, McIntyre lets off to drag Corbin up, for a NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO!! Corbin survives as McIntyre shows more of his arsenal. McIntyre SLAPS Corbin, Corbin throws a haymaker and now it’s a brawl! McIntyre windmills haymakers on Corbin, then lets off as they’re on the ropes. Lashley is still watching as McIntyre shoves Corbin. Corbin holds ropes, puts McIntyre on the apron, and ROCKS him with an uppercut! Corbin POSTS McIntyre and McIntyre hits the floor! MVP claps but tells Corbin to stay on McIntyre!

Corbin drags McIntyre up, brings him around and bumps him off the desk! MVP likes this “table service” as Corbin puts McIntyre back in. Corbin drives elbows into McIntyre’s neck and shoulders, but the ref reprimands the hair pulling. Corbin talks trash, McIntyre ROCKS Corbin! Corbin hits back, drags McIntyre up, but McIntyre throws more hands! McIntyre CHOPS then reels Corbin in. Corbin denies the suplex to suplex McIntyre back! Cover, TWO!! McIntyre is still in this and MVP grows frustrated. Corbin drags McIntyre up, roll shim, and has a Pluma Blanca while throwing down furious elbows!! Corbin lets off and McIntyre clutches his jaw.

MVP says this is Corbin’s chance, and Corbin drags McIntyre back up. McIntyre hits back with haymakers and CHOPS! McIntyre runs but into a choke grip! For a CHOKE SLAM! Cover, TWO!! Corbin seethes as McIntyre survives. McIntyre gets to a corner, Corbin runs in, but McIntyre dodges! Corbin slides out, slides in but into a SPINEBUSTER! Jackknife cover, TWO! Corbin survives and McIntyre is just a bit surprised. McIntyre keeps on Corbin with a facelock, and shifts to underhooks, but Corbin RAMS McIntyre into a corner. McIntyre elbows back hard, then runs, but into a SIDEWALK SLAM! Cover, TWO! Corbin is furious but McIntyre still lives!

MVP shouts, “Corbin, do you want to go to WrestleMania?” Corbin reels McIntyre in but gets a GLASGOW KISS! then a FUTURE SHOCK!! Cover, TWO!?! Corbin survives and McIntyre is beside himself. McIntyre goes to the corner, goes out and climbs up, but Corbin ROCKS him first! Corbin throws more hands, climbs up after him, rains down some rights, and stands McIntyre up. SUPERPLEX! Corbin crawls to a cover, TWO!! McIntyre isn’t done yet and now MVP is speechless. McIntyre rolls away to a corner, Corbin goes to the other. McIntyre grits his teeth, clutches his back, but he glares at Corbin. McIntyre crawls that way, stands up, but Corbin ROCKS him!

McIntyre hits back! Corbin hits again, but McIntyre kicks low! Corbin throws another haymaker but McIntyre kicks, haymakers, CHOPS, and runs into DEEP SIX!! Cover, TWO!! MVP excuses himself from commentary to talk to Corbin. “IT’s not about beating McIntyre! It’s about taking him out! Take him OUT!” MVP hands his cane over, and Corbin nods. Corbin aims at McIntyre, but McIntyre dodges to CLAYMORE!! Cover, McIntyre wins!!

Winner: Drew McIntyre, by pinfall

MVP clearing things up only cost Corbin! The Scottish Warrior slays the Wolf King, and now only has one match to go! Will the next five days be the All Mighty Era’s last? But wait, here comes Lashley! MVP meets Lashley at the stage, and Lashley stares McIntyre down. Who will give more of themselves in order to have the WWE World Championship?


My Thoughts:

Not a great go-home but not an awful one. This did suffer from the usual go-home problems of just too many recaps and commercial breaks. Just, so much, even for what happened in this episode. We didn’t need to recap what happened to Bunny’s car right before he and Priest talked about it. But now, the info that leaked months ago is finally verified, we’re getting a tag match of Bunny & Priest VS Miz & Morrison, so that it isn’t all on Bunny going against Miz to win. The promos were good, though, and it seems like Miz is being hypocritical. He wasn’t respected for coming in as a reality show guy, but says Bunny doesn’t belong as just a celebrity fan. This should be used as material but it isn’t because Vince doesn’t know what “continuity” means.

The promo before the Woods VS Styles rematch was fun because of Riddle using weed references, but I feel like that all took longer than the match. Woods getting the quick win on Styles thanks to Kofi and Omos distracting Styles surely means that somehow, someway, Omos and Styles win the titles. That’s going to be big for Omos, and means WWE/Vince sees a lot of potential in him, let’s just hope Vince doesn’t get bored and leaves Omos wallowing in the midcard one day. Speaking of Riddle, I like that his other gag is interrupting other people with his scooter fly-by. Sheamus and Ali had a good segment, Ali VS Riddle was a really good match, and Riddle VS Sheamus is going to be great and could go either way.

Braun had a good promo about how he’s doing this for those bullied mentally and emotionally, though he might’ve missed a few things here and there. I still don’t think a steel cage was the best stipulation, but maybe it’s just a way to literally keep the fight contained to the ring rather than having a Last Man Standing type spill out towards fans when we’re supposed to keep social distance and whatnot. No idea who wins this but it’d be a shame if Shane did through his cheating. Braun’s had a decent Mania run, winning the Raw Tag Team Championships and looking strong, so I would hope he wins to stand tall for those he’s representing.

I had a feeling Rhea would make sure Asuka lost the tag match tonight as she’s going Heel for this story, but I didn’t think she’d attack Asuka herself. That was a good twist, as Rhea isn’t the kind to run away and avoid things, so that much still carries over from Face Rhea. Asuka will definitely want revenge and that will add to the intensity of their match, and I personally hope Asuka retains. The tag champions get momentum but the Tag Turmoil to determine their challengers is only slightly what I was expecting. I hope this one time, WWE throws away their Face VS Heel requirement and let Natty & Tamina win so we can get a really great match, each team having a technical type and a powerhouse. Then Natty & Tamina should win when Nia & Shayna fall apart, because neither Natty or Tamina has had anything in quite some time.

The world title story was pretty good tonight, with Lashley settling things with Benjamin & Alexander. It is sad to know that the Hurt Business split was all Vince, but who else’s idea would it have been? Lashley is dominant again, but McIntyre VS Corbin was a great match to be the main event here. They started a bit late on this whole thing of a bounty on McIntyre’s head, it didn’t really feel like McIntyre was ever going to miss Mania, but I suppose they get an A for effort. Lashley VS McIntyre will be really good if it even just matches tonight’s match. It’d be pretty wild for McIntyre if he becomes a 3-time champion in the span of just one year, but it’s hard to say he won’t get this win. You might as well flip a coin because both Lashley and McIntyre have been putting in work, either one is worthy.

My Score: 8/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (3/18/24)

Talk about a Big Time Raw!

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Will The Man be the Last Woman Standing?

Becky Lynch and Nia Jax want to finally put this to an end, so tonight on Raw, it will be a Big Time Last Woman Standing match! Will the Irresistible Force force the WrestleMania 40 match to change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: #DIY VS The Creed Brothers; DIY wins and advances to WrestleMania.
  • Candice LeRae & Indi Hartwell VS Kayden Carter & Katana Chance; Candice & Indi win.
  • Dominik Mysterio w/ JD McDonagh VS Ricochet; Ricochet wins.
  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The Awesome Truth VS Indus Sher; The Awesome Truth wins and advances to WrestleMania.
  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The New Day VS The Alpha Academy; The New Day wins and advances to WrestleMania.
  • Last Woman Standing: Becky Lynch VS Nia Jax; Becky wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Jey Uso is here!

North Carolina State University fires up and bounces along with Main Event Jey, and Pat McAfee plays a dangerous game standing on the armchairs! From Bret VS Owen to Matt VS Jeff, we’re about to get Jey VS Jimmy in the third-ever Brother VS Brother WrestleMania grudge match! Jey gets the mic as fans chant “YEET! YEET! YEET!” Jey welcomes us to Monday Night Raw, and wants us to check this out. He knows his brothers are somewhere in the building. He knows The Bloodline’s in the building. He knows how the Bloodline rolls! SO Big Brother Jimmy, where you at?! Where you at, Uce!?

Jey waits for someone to show up somewhere, and the crowd spots them first! Fans boo as Jimmy & Solo make their way from the back of the stands. Jimmy gets a mic and goes to the apron while Solo paces around the outside. Fans chant “YEET! YEET! YEET!” again as Jey puts the sunglasses aside. The Usos stare each other down, the fans now chant “UCE! OH! UCE! OH!” Jey wants to say something, hesitates, but then says these two would always get to it but they always knew how to shake right back to this. But now it’s different. Regardless of what happened, the bad blood between them, Jey misses his brother. He does.

Jey knows Jimmy will say what he wants, but Jey doesn’t talk to him no more, doesn’t ride with him no more, doesn’t even see him no more! Jimmy can just come back. Jimmy says he never left! He protected Jey! Jey’s so dumb, he can’t see it! Jimmy is protecting Jey! It was Jey’s idea to leave The Bloodline, but Jimmy helped because he is Jey’s brother. So yeah, Jey leaves, and what happens? Lil’ Bro becomes the BIGGEST star on the Raw roster! Lil’ Bro becomes the top merch seller! Lil’ Bro goes off to become a tag team champion without Jimmy, but with CODY RHODES!? Who left who, Uce?

Jey forgot Jimmy! Everything Jey did that was big was cuz of Big Bro Jimmy! Everything! So listen loud and clear. The biggest moment in Jey’s career, the BIGGEST moment, is because of Jimmy! Jimmy stares Jey down, but Jey says no. Jey’s biggest moment in his career is going to be his dream match at WrestleMania 40: Jey VS Jimmy, and Jey knocks the yeet out Jimmy’s ass! Jey DECKS Jimmy, DECKS Solo off the apron, but then Jimmy SUPERKICKS Jey down! The fans boo but now Solo storms in and looms over Jey. Solo drags Jey up so Jimmy can look him in the face and tell him that Jey needs to get it right! JIMMY made Jey!

But here comes Cody Rhodes! The fans fire up as Cody DECKS Jimmy, then gets in to springboard and CODY CUTTER Solo!! The American Nightmare said he was gonna be a Bloodline Hunter, and he made sure they didn’t take out Jey! Cody tells The Bloodline it is only a matter of time before they lose it all at WrestleMania! Will Jey prove that younger or older doesn’t matter when he is the BETTER brother?

 

Adam Pearce is on the phone.

He’s telling Nick Aldis to stop being a hypocrite, telling Pearce to keep his roster in check when this is happening. But then Paul Heyman walks over and Pearce says he’ll call Aldis back. Pearce then asks Heyman what was all that, and Heyman says he owes Pearce an apology. He is sorry. That was not authorized by The Final Boss nor The Tribal Chief, and certainly not by Heyman. Jimmy & Solo went into business for themselves so Heyman apologizes. But listen, Pearce knows that there have been flight delays all day. Even private jets like theirs. Heyman is barely even dressed for TV, let alone has his make-up!

Pearce says those two were ready. Yeah, well, they got in on a different flight. But Roman Reigns is a chief of his word. Those two are already gone, out of the arena, and Pearce has Roman’s word. Call his bluff, put out a search party. Pearce knows Heyman is here on official business, which Heyman will handle, and then be gone. That is it. But when Heyman does his official business… everyone will be caught off guard. “And Mr. Pearce, sir, that’s not a prediction. That’s a spoiler.” The Wise Man heads out and calls Roman, but just what is Heyman teasing?

 

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: #DIY VS The Creed Brothers!

Unlike SmackDown’s mini-tournament, Raw and Adam Pearce say it’s win and you’re in! Tommaso Ciampa & Johnny Gargano want one more shot at Judgment Day, but so do Julius & Brutus! Will the Sicilian Psycho & Johnny Wrestling prove that when it comes to Mania Moments, you gotta do it yourself? Or will the Creeds be bringing golden tickets to the Diamond Mine?

Raw returns as The Creeds make their entrance. The teams fist bump to show respect, then the teams sort out. Julius starts against Ciampa, they circle and tie up. They’re in a deadlock, Ciampa goes for a waistlock but Julius facelocks. Julius wrangles Ciampa to the mat, flips him over, ONE, and Ciampa keeps moving. They trade facelocks, gator roll, and Julius gets another lateral press. ONE, but Julius gator rolls Ciampa around. Ciampa fights up, puts Julius on ropes, and the ref counts. Ciampa lets off, then CHOPS! Julius shoots in for the takedown! Julius has a leg, Ciampa fights but Julius turns him for the ANKLE LOCK!

Ciampa scrambles to the ROPEBREAK, and Julius lets off cleanly. Ciampa bails out, shakes it off, and he gets back in. They go again, Julius hits a fireman’s carry takeover! Tag to Brutus, and Julius feeds Ciampa to another fireman’s carry takeover! Brutus cording holds but Ciampa endures. Ciampa fights up, but Brutus facelocks. The fans rally as Brutus switches and rolls Ciampa. Ciampa fights up, headlocks, then ROCKS Brutus! Brutus DECKS Ciampa, then whips him to ropes. Ciampa ducks ‘n’ dodges, tag to Gargano! Ciampa slides, CHOPS, Gargano LARIATS and Ciampa JAWBREAKERS! Wrench and LARIAT!

Julius runs in, Gargano kicks and Ciampa gives him the boost for SLICED BREAD! The Creeds bail out, but DIY DOUBLE PLANCHA! Down go the Creeds, and DIY applaud and pat themselves on the back. The fans fire up and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Ciampa has Julius in a chinlock. The fans rally, Julius fights up to throw body shots, but Ciampa hits a back suplex! Julius lands out of it, but Ciampa elbows him away. Ciampa drop toeholds Julius, gets legs, but Julius BOOTS Ciampa away! Hot tags to Gargano and Brutus! Brutus rallies on DIY, TOSSES Gargano, then blocks Ciampa’s kick to get under and POWERBOMB him! Brutus sees DIY regroup, then he runs in to SPLASH them both! O’Conner on Ciampa, but Gargano runs up! NORTHERN LIGHTS! Brutus has a DOUBLE BRIDGE, TWO!! Tag to Julius and he gut wrench SLAMS Brutus on Ciampa!

Brutus helps Julius flip up and over to SPLASH onto Ciampa! Cover, TWO! The fans rally up as Julius drags Ciampa up. Ciampa throat chops! A bit dirty but Ciampa wants that win! Ciampa storms up on Julius, but Julius basement stalling suplexes!! The fans are thunderous, Gargano runs in, but Brutus intercepts! Brutus suplexes Gargano now, stalls, and then the Creeds SLAM and kip up! Then they both STANDING MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Ciampa stays in this for DIY but the Creeds keep cool. Julius stomps Ciampa, tags Brutus, and they KNEE Ciampa around! Then they DOUBLE GUTBUSTER! Ciampa sputters but Brutus tags Julius in.

Julius drags Ciampa up, tags Brutus back in, and Brutus climbs. Julius Electric Chair Lifts, but Gargano makes the save! Gargano ROCKS Julius, Brutus ROCKS Gargano! Ciampa BOOTS Brutus, Gargano swings on Julius but is sent into Ciampa! Ciampa pushes Gargano back so he can ELBOW Julius! DIY set up again but Brutus stops the Sliced Bread! Julius DECKS Ciampa, KNEE into the WIDOWMAKER! Julius scrapes Gargano out, Brutus POUNCES Ciampa over the desk! Pat fires up with Brutus and so do the fans! The Creeds say they run this now, and then Brutus drags Ciampa up while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Julius has Ciampa in a chinlock. Ciampa fights up, and he JAWBREAKERS free! Ciampa ELBOWS Brutus down, BOOTS Julius, then runs up, only for Julius to catch him and toss him back! But then Ciampa catches Julius for a REVERSE DDT! The fans fire up while both men are down and crawling! Hot tag to Gargano! Gargano slingshots to KICK Julius, then he CLOBBERS Brutus! ENZIGIRI for Julius, then he runs to DOUBLE KNEE Brutus! BULLDOG LARIAT COMBO! The fans fire up with Gargano while Julius ends up in another corner. Gargano runs in but is put on the apron!

Gargano GAMANGIRIS Julius, SUPERKICKS Brutus, then SLINGSHOT SPEARS Julius! Cover, TWO! Julius survives but Gargano puts him in a corner. Gargano CHOPS, then hoists Julius up top. Tag to Ciampa, Ciampa CHOPS Julius while Gargano DIVES onto Brutus! Ciampa CHOPS Julius again, goes up top, and fireman’s carries! Ciampa then tucks Julius in for the SUPER AIR RAID CRASH! Cover, TWO!! Julius survives again and shocks Ciampa! The fans are just as stunned, but Ciampa and Julius sit up. Ciampa stands, and he CHOPS! And CHOPS! Julius sits back up as Ciampa puts some stank on the CHOP!

Julius brings the straps down! Julius fires a forearm, Ciampa hits back, and the fans fire up as the shots keep going! They go faster and faster, harder and harder, meaner and meaner! The fans fire up as this just turns into a brawl of haymakers and SLAPS! Ciampa then gets around, ripcord and HAYMAKER! ROLLING- TACKLE from Julius! And then the ANKLE LOCK!! Ciampa reaches out, moves around, but Gargano runs up! Julius kicks him, then gets him up with one arm to POWERBOMB! Then it’s back to the ANKLE LOCK on Ciampa! Brutus gets in to get Gargano for an ANKLE LOCK of his own!

The fans are thunderous as DIY endures! Ciampa and Gargano fight, turn things over, SICILIAN CROSSFACE and GargaNO Escape!! The fans are thunderous as The Creeds power up and lift both DIY! They fireman’s carry, then TOSS DIY into each other!! The fans are thunderous as Julius goes up to MOONSAULT onto Ciampa! Brutus MOONSAULTS, too! Cover, TWO?!?! Ciampa survives and the fans are loving this! Julius tags back in, Brutus climbs up! “This is Awesome!” as Julius Electric Chair Lifts Ciampa! But Ciampa VICTORY ROLLS to get under the Brutus Ball!! Cover, Brutus tips it! Gargano TOSSES Brutus then SUPERKICKS Julius!! Ciampa has the cover, DIY WINS!!

Winners: DIY, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

Julius can’t believe it! He kicked out at 3.1, but a loss is a loss! And for the first time ever, DIY is going to Mania! Will Philadelphia soon be historic for a DIY championship victory?

 

Judgment Day meets backstage.

Rhea Ripley is with Dominik Mysterio, Finn Balor & JD McDonagh, but also Andrade. Dom says he’s always liked Andrade’s style, but things have changed since the last time he was in the WWE. The Judgment Day runs Raw now. Rhea says yeah, and they don’t extend invitations to just anyone. Judgment Day is very exclusive. JD says very exclusive. But if Andrade continues to impress them, they’ll see about making things happen. And Finn says he just heard that Andrade has a match next week, so the Judgment Day will be watching him. Sounds good. See you next week. But then in steps Damian Priest.

The Punisher says hello to El Idolo, and El Idolo says hello to Senor Dinero. Andrade heads out, will he quite literally win his way into the club? But as for Priest, Finn asks him what he was up to. Priest was getting a closer look at that DIY VS Creeds match. DIY won, but whatever, they can handle those guys. But JD, they thought he could handle Ricochet last week, and run the gauntlet, and then go to WrestleMania to bring even more gold back to Judgment Day. JD says he did he belonged in there. But also, he battered Ricochet, who got lucky at the end there. Right, Finn? Finn hesitates, and Rhea says Priest is right on this one.

Ricochet made a fool out of JD! A fool? Yes. A fool? Yes. That’s why tonight, Dom will make it right. Right, Dom? Yeah, Mami. Let’s go talk to Pearce to make it official. Dom & JD head out, and the others are confident Dom’s got this. But does he, though? Or will the One and Only have two wins over Judgment Day in as many weeks?

 

Candice LeRae & Indi Hartwell VS Kayden Carter & Katana Chance!

The Poison Pixie certainly lived up to that name last week when she bullied Maxxine Dupri as part of beating her and Ivy Nile last week. Will Candice’s toxic tongue strike again? Or will the party not be stopped by her harsh vibes?

The teams sort out and Candice starts against Kayden. Candice rushes up, Kayden gets around and O’Conner Rolls, TWO! Kayden springboards to basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Kayden stalks Candice, Candice ELBOWS her away then tags Indi. Kayden dodges Candice to SUPERKICK, but Indi BOOTS Kayden! Cover, TWO! Indi drags Kayden up, tags Candice back in, and they mug Kayden. Candice CLUBS away on Kayden, fires off furious fists, then covers. TWO, and Candice grows frustrated already. The fans rally, Candice steps up but Kayden avoids the senton! Tags to Katana and Indi! Katana blasts past Indi, comes back and BULLDOGS!

Katana keeps moving, ducks ‘n’ dodges, then SHOTGUNS Indi to a corner! The fans fire up as Katana stomps away on Indi! Indi shoves Katana, Katana runs corner to corner to A-LIST LARIAT! Katana shoves Indi down, runs up, but into a back suplex! Katana lands out, but her leg jams! The ref and Kayden check, then the ref keeps Indi back. Indi says okay, and she stays by Candice. But Candice tags in to WRECK Kayden! And she SLAMS Katana’s leg into the post!! HALF CRAB and DEEP! Katana taps, Candice & Indi win!

Winners: Candice LeRae & Indi Hartwell, by submission

Candice smiles and celebrates with Indi, but Indi doesn’t want to. Candice says a win is a win, but just what is going on in her toxic mind?

 

Cody Rhodes makes his way to the ring.

NC State fires up again as The American Nightmare walks down the ramp, and this time the fans can sing along with the song, “WHOA~ OH~!” Cody gets his pyro then gets the mic. “In less than three weeks time, I will stand opposed for the second year in a row, in the main event, with the lights on brightest, I will challenge for the WWE Undisputed Championship, against the greatest champion in all of sports, The Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns. And this Friday on SmackDown, Roman and I are going to have a little conversation, if you will. But there are… complications. Factors, elements, combustible elements, namely… The Rock.”

Fans boo but Cody says The Rock took to Instagram on Friday, and followed it up with “extremely entertaining” concert. Too bad The Rock didn’t wanna be here tonight. Something Cody took from the Instagram post: The Rock referred to himself as “Our Favorite Heel.” A bit of an inside term, but we’re not dumb, we know that means he’s the “bad guy.” Cody has known Heels. Bobby Heenan, Arn Anderson, Michael Hayes, “Superstar” Billy Graham, “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair! Fans “WOO~” and Cody says he doesn’t think The Rock is a Heel. He’s just an assh*le. The fans go nuts hearing that!

Cody doesn’t want Rock getting upset, he doesn’t want the “seven bucks team” to get upset, he doesn’t want anyone getting emotional. Cody knows how Rock feels about emotions, he poked fun at Cody tearing up at discussing “finishing the story” with good friend, Michael Cole. There’s no crying in pro-wrestling, Jimmy Dugan, we get it. But hasn’t The Rock been crying behind the scenes this whole time? Once that hashtag came out, once fans chanted something else, The Rock cried to his buddies on the TKO board and said “Hey, this is gonna be some good PR for The Rock! I need to save WWE!” God knows, look at this house. They sure needed “saving,” huh?

The fans cheer but Cody says Rock wanted great PR. Until it wasn’t. TKO said OMG yes, put on the Gucci shirt, get those muscles looking big. It’s because they are Yes People, they are enablers, they won’t dare tell The Rock like it is, so Cody’s going to. Cody tells The Rock, “You’re a lot of things. You’re a lot of wonderful things. You are the Braham Bull, you are The Great One.” Cody still has shoes with The Rock’s logo on it! The Rock is the only guy Cody honestly feels is a Mount Rushmore wrestler. But he is also a terrible salesman, a carny succubus, and for those who don’t get what that means, The Rock is “a whiny b*tch!”

Fans lose their minds again but Cody says The Rock has been convinced otherwise. But don’t think that for two seconds this locker room needs The Rock more than The Rock needs it! That’s a rule of wrestling, nobody is bigger than the business! And sure, Cody brought up his mom, so it is fair game for The Rock to use that. But Cody knows The Rock’s mom. Here’s what Cody will tell us about The Rock’s mom. She is a wonderful lady, salt of the earth, she helped Cody chop Kevin in a dark match. Cody has nothing but respect for The Rock’s mom, something The Rock should’ve echoed back towards Cody’s mom.

But see, The Rock was talking about whipping Cody, handing a bloody weight belt to Cody’s mom, and normally someone as powerful as The Rock, Mama Rhodes would tremble. But The Rock doesn’t know Cody’s mom. Cody was more scared than she was, because she ain’t scared of nothing. This is the same woman who once jumped out of her chair at a Willie Nelson concert and beat up an undercover cop! She ain’t afraid of The Rock! Cody has been asked, April 6th, biggest tag match of all time, Rock & Roman VS Cody & Seth. Seth Rollins, the World Heavyweight Champion, a man The Rock should respect because that man has carried The Rock’s company!

How will Cody get past that match? How will April 7th look? Will it be a fair fight? Cody can tell us honestly… He doesn’t know. Cody does not know if it will be Bloodline Rules or not. Hell, he might not #FinishTheStory. “But Dwayne… What do you know? How can you be so sure of your own self, right?” The Rock hasn’t been in the ring in real action in years! April 6th, the bell is gonna ring, and what happens then? Is The Rock gonna bring The Great One, the hero we all had growing up? Is he bringing that #BigDwayneEnergy? Or is it gonna be LDS, Little D*ck Syndrome?! The fans chant “L D S! L D S!”

Cody says The Rock has referred to himself as The Final Boss. Kudos for that nickname, maybe he really is that. Maybe Cody is too naive to see it. But at WrestleMania, Cody doesn’t think The Rock will be The Final Boss. At WrestleMania, he’s just Roman’s side chick. But then ladies and gentlemen, his name is Paul Heyman, and he serves as The Wise Man to Your Tribal Chief, the reigning! Defending! Undisputed! WWE Universal Heavyweight Champion, Roman… Reigns! And as Special Counsel to the Bloodline, Heyman is here to say to Cody that the ideals that Cody and Heyman share are far greater than the interests on which they conflict.

By example, don’t you hate it when someone comes out to demand an apology? Not that Cody’s done that, but Heyman is still going to do that. Heyman came out here with some “friends” of his, and he apologized. For a Wise Man, that was pretty freakin’ stupid. One: because it didn’t work. Two: because it was just dumb. And for that, Cody, to you and the fans, Heyman humbly apologizes. Cody says whoa, whoa, whoa. He didn’t ask for an apology, and he certainly knows Heyman wants permission to be in the ring. Heyman is a Hall of Famer starting this year, if he wants into the ring, be Cody’s guest.

Heyman thanks Cody for that but he’s fine on the apron. He carries with him a message from The Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns. Talk about Heels… You may think of Heyman anything negative you want, and that might be understanding the obvious. Heyman is not trustworthy, but Roman is a chief of his word. Heyman assures that this Friday on SmackDown, Roman will be face to face with Cody. American Nightmare, Tribal Chief, challenger and champion. And when they are face to face, there will not be a single other member of The Bloodline in sight. Except for Heyman, but he is no physical threat.

Heyman holds the title belt, the beads, whispers things in Roman’s ear, such as his love and respect. But Cody has Roman’s word that if he shows up on SmackDown, Roman will show up alone. Cody says Roman shows up alone, no Bloodline outside of Heyman, it’s a deal. They good? Heyman has some jet lag, he forgot one little point. And don’t boo him, he’s talking to Cody! Cody says yes they’re booing, and he’s about to go full Homelander and rip Heyman’s throat out if he doesn’t get to the point. Fans like the reference. Heyman composes himself and says if Roman Reigns shows up alone this Friday on SmackDown, then Cody must show up to SmackDown alone, too.

Cody steps closer to Heyman and Heyman is a bit nervous. Cody tells Heyman, “Deal!” They shake hands, and Heyman smiles. The Wise Man negotiated a purely one-on-one meeting between his Tribal Chief and American Nightmare, but can we trust Heyman was telling the truth about Roman telling the truth?

 

Nia Jax speaks.

“You know what I’ve realized? Becky Lynch has never beaten me. And after tonight, she never will. Because after I break her face again, I will be taking her spot at WrestleMania. I will finish business with Rhea Ripley, and not only will I walk out the Last Woman Standing, but I will become Women’s World Champion.” The Irresistible Force is ready for the Big Time, but will she A-Nia-late her?

 

Cody Rhodes returns backstage.

And Jey says there he go! But real quick, Cody can’t be going to SmackDown alone. Cody says he gave them his word. But The Bloodline isn’t gonna play fair! They’re all gonna be there! If Cody needs Jey, Jeys’ got him. Cody hears that, but he knows what he’s dealing with. They shake hands and Jey heads out. Will Cody be able to have that fair, one-on-one meeting? Or does Jey have a point about The Bloodline?

 

Dominik Mysterio w/ JD McDonagh VS Ricochet!

It seems Pearce agreed to the idea that Dirty Dom should try and clean up The Irish Ace’s mess. Will Dom be able to get revenge on Ricochet? Or will Ricochet be the One and Only person holding their head high tonight?

Raw returns and Dom has made his entrance. The bell rings, Dom and Ricochet circle, and they tie up. Ricochet waistlocks, Dom fights the lift and grabs ropes. The ref counts, Ricochet lets off, but Dom ELBOWS him away! Dom fires hands, soaks up the heat, then storms up, but into haymakers! Ricochet CHOPS, kicks then flexes on Dom. Ricochet whips, Dom reverses, but Ricochet goes up and over. Ricochet ducks ‘n’ dodges to then handspring back elbow! The fans fire up while Dom bails out! JD is there to coach Dom up, but Ricochet runs in! JD gets Dom to safety, but Ricochet handsprings to hero land!

The fans fire up, Ricochet then goes to ropes to TORNILLO PLANCHA! Direct hit on Dom and Ricochet tells JD to back off. Ricochet puts Dom in, Dom distracts the ref, but JD grabs Ricochet’s leg! Ricochet kicks JD away, but then Dom WRECKS Ricochet with a dropkick! Dom soaks up the heat and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Dom has Ricochet up top. Dom climbs but Ricochet throws body shots! The fans rally behind Ricochet as he sends Dom staggering. Ricochet hops down as Dom comes running back, and Ricochet GAMANGIRIS him away! Ricochet then springboards, but Dom trips him up! Ricochet flops to the mat, then Dom kicks and FACEBUSTERS! Cover, TWO! Ricochet is still in this and JD argues the count. Dom looms over Ricochet, scuffs him around, then mockingly cheers him on. Fans boo but Dom brings Ricochet up. Dom gives some Latino Heat, then suplexes! Uno Amigo, but fans boo.

Dom gets Ricochet up but Ricochet suplexes Dom instead! And then fireman’s carry, DYNAMITE KICK! Cover, TWO! Dom is still in this and JD coaches him but the fans rally for Ricochet. Ricochet stands, storms up on Dom, but Dom shoots around to roll him up! With tights! TWO, Ricochet blocks a kick and KICKS Dom down! Ricochet hurries up top, the fans fire up, but Ricochet has to bail out of the 450 as Dom moves! Dom runs in again, but into a SUPERKICK! JD gets on the apron, so Ricochet triangle jump DROPKICKS! But then Dom DROPKICKS Ricochet onto ropes! Dom dials it up but Ricochet ducks!

Dom spins around, into the RECOIL!! Cover, Ricochet wins!

Winner: Ricochet, by pinfall

But then JD runs in! Ricochet dodges, goes up and around, BOOTS JD away, then BOOTS him again! Ricochet even flips up and out of the ring at the same time! Ricochet gets the better of Judgment Day again, just how disappointed is Mami going to be in her Latino Heat this time?

 

Sami Zayn is backstage.

He finds Chad Gable and wants to talk with him. Last week’s match, that was an honor. Sami hasn’t been pushed like that in a long time, it could’ve gone either way. Gable says yeah, it was great. Thanks. Is Gable alright? Yeah, he’s fine. Kinda feels like not… Gable says he’s fine, so leave it at that. C’mon, man, how many years have they known each other? Sami knows when something’s bothering Gable, so he should just say it. Gable says look, last week, the WrestleMania opportunity, the whole thing, it just meant more to him. Sami says he’s been hearing Gable say that for weeks, and it is really unfair.

Does Gable really think he’s the only one this title opportunity matters to? Sami has a family, too! Sami’s kid cries when Papa loses a match, too. Sami has people he’s let down and is trying to make proud. After all the years put into this, Gable can’t tell Sami what matters more because he doesn’t know Sami like that. Gable has Sami calm down, and says he knows all that. But it isn’t all about that. Then what is all this? Gable says Sami can’t beat Gunther. Gable then leaves, and Sami is at a loss for words. Is this bitter side of Gable only going to get worse as we go down this Road to WrestleMania?

 

Adam Pearce is in the ring.

Raw returns with the GM by a table, and he welcomes us to a contract signing to make official the Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship for WrestleMania! The fans cheer, and Pearce introduces first, the challenger, Sami Zayn! The Great Liberator makes his entrance and the fans sing along with his song. Sami still looks troubled by what Gable said just moments ago, but he still high-fives fans and gets in the ring. Then Pearce introduces the longest reigning Intercontinental Champion of all time, Der Ring General, GUNTHER! The fans boo as Gunther walks in, having reached Day 647!

Gunther smiles as Sami watches him make his way down the ramp and into the ring. Pearce says we know how this works, but Gunther says before we proceed, let us call this what it is: the most important contract signing for the most important match in the history of this championship. And why, why, why is the challenger dressed no better than any of the bums in the audience? Fans boo but Sami just shrugs that off. Sami gets a mic to say that Gunther keeps sitting there all smug, and it’s really starting to piss Sami off. Gunther thinks this is just another day at the office, that he’ll steamroll through Sami like any other contender.

But with all respect to Gunther, he really has. He has beaten everyone that has come his way, and has done it on his own. Gunther doesn’t believe Sami can do it. A lot of people didn’t believe Sami at many points in his career. They didn’t believe he’d even make it to WWE, let alone win championships and main event a WrestleMania. And if you ask The Usos, they didn’t believe Sami would be one of the guys to end the longest tag title reign in WWE history, but he did! And one year later, he will make history again by ending the longest Intercontinental title reign in WWE history! Sami signs his part and pushes the contract over to Gunther.

The fans cheer Sami on but Gunther waits it out. Gunther tells Sami, what Sami should do is listen to his new friend, Gable. Gable doesn’t believe Sami can win. The people here cheer Sami, they probably even love Sami. But even they don’t believe Sami can win. And y’know, when Gunther looks Sami in the eyes, and if Sami was honest with himself, even Sami doesn’t believe he can win. So what Sami is doing right now is standing on Gunther’s doorstep and begging him to get the beating of a lifetime on the Grandest Stage of Them All! So whatever Sami has to do, from training to believing, just keep doing that. Because at WrestleMania, Sami’s dreams will meet reality.

Gunther grins and signs his part, and it is now official! Gunther then stands, title on his shoulder, and takes his leave. The fans boo, but then Sami tells Gunther to wait. Gunther steps back inside to hear Sami as Sami turns around. Gunther looks in Sami’s eyes and believes Sami doesn’t believe? Sami stands to get in Gunther’s face and dares him to look again. Get a good long look, because these are the eyes of the man who will take you down at Mania! The fans fire up, and now Sami leaves first. Gunther still just grins, but will Sami use a Helluva Kick to wipe that smile off his face?

We follow Sami as he storms backstage, right past DIY and The Awesome Truth. Truth asks what’s up with Sami, but The Miz says that is the mindset of WrestleMania right there. That’s what they need. DIY wishes Awesome Truth luck. Awesome Truth knows DIY is into the ladder match, and they are gonna have their own qualifier. Miz & Truth just need to beat… Indus Sher. Jinder Mahal tells Veer & Sanga to warm up for the match. They head out, and Truth says he feels sorry for whoever has to face those guys. Miz stares at Truth, and he has DIY hold off. Miz will explain. The Awesome Truth heads to gorilla, their match is next!

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The Awesome Truth VS Indus Sher w/ Jinder Mahal!

Miz wants a remix of the theme song but Truth says to just follow his lead. NC State knows what’s up, but will the Awesome Truth finally reach the top of the tag division 13 years after they first teamed? We’ll see, after the break!

Raw returns as Indus Sher makes their entrance, the Modern Day Maharaja by their side. The teams sort out and Truth starts against Sanga. The fans echo “WHAT’S UP?!” but Sanga roars! Truth is scared now so he tags Miz. Truth fires Miz up, Miz runs up and dodges Sanga to fire off haymakers! Miz kicks, whips, but Sanga blocks! Sanga whips and CLOBBERS Miz! Jinder nods as Sanga then scoops Miz and brings him over. Veer tags in, Sanga SLAMS Miz, then Veer ELBOW DROPS! Indus Sher say “NAMASTE!” but the fans say “WHAT’S UP!?” with Truth. Veer HIP DROPS Miz, then looms over him.

Veer eggs Miz on, drags him up with shoulder claws, and then steps over Miz for the neck wrench! Miz endures as Veer still digs a claw into his shoulder. The fans rally for Miz, Miz fights up and throws body shots! Miz reaches out but Veer knees low! Veer SHOVES Miz to the corner, runs in, but Miz BOOTS! Miz ELBOWS Sanga, but Veer catches him! Veer puts Miz back int he corner, but Miz ducks the boot to tag Truth! Truth dodges Veer and starts up the shoulder tackles! Truth gets around Veer to SPIN-OUT BOMB! The fans fire up as Truth shouts out Cena with “You Can’t See Me!” Truth runs to Five Knuckle Shuffle!

Jinder is not happy now as Truth fireman’s carries! But Veer slips free! Truth drop toeholds to the STF!! The fans fire up but Sanga stomps Truth! Miz fires off kicks on Sanga, then body shots! Truth joins in, they mug and whip Sanga, to DOUBLE DROPKICK! Sanga staggers around, Veer runs up, but into a full nelson! Truth and Miz combine for a SKULL CRUSHING LIE DETECTOR!! But Sanga whips Miz away! Miz WRECKS Jinder with it, but Sanga runs up! Sanga knocks Miz down, Miz anchors Sanga, Sanga ELBOWS Truth, Truth falls onto Veer for the cover! Awesome Truth wins!!

Winners: The Awesome Truth, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

The fans fire up, and Truth doesn’t even realize what happened! Miz celebrates with Truth and Truth puts it together! They’re now one of the six in the ladder match! Will this combination of teamwork and luck be just what they need to take those titles from Judgment Day?

 

Sami confronts Gable now.

Sami tells Gable to tell him why. Why what? Why does Gable think Sami can’t beat Gunther? Well you just saw why! With Gunther, it isn’t just physical, it is mental. Sami made his career out of being the underdog that crawls his way out of any hole he’s in, right? Just like last week! Sami found the window of opportunity to get out of a bad situation any time he can. Gunther’s on a different level! You gonna sit and wait for that window to appear? It doesn’t happen with Gunther! He’s a different beast, a different animal. If Sami doesn’t change his mentality, then he can’t beat Gunther. Gable leaves Sami with a lot to think again. Is there a way Sami can change enough to defeat Der Ring General?

 

CM Punk speaks.

“Do I plan at being in WrestleMania? WrestleMania is in Philadelphia, what’re the first four letters in Philadelphia? Phil. You can’t have WrestleMania Philadelphia without Phil. Whether I’m invited or uninvited, Punk will be there.” And next week in Chicago, Punk returns to Raw! Will the Second City Saint find a way to be part of the biggest WrestleMania ever?

 

Drew McIntyre is here!

The Scottish Terminator, or as his new shirt says, “The Savior of WrestleMania,” makes his way to the ring, NC State a bit torn about seeing him. But then Seth Rollins is here, too!? McIntyre is upset but the fans sing along, “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~!” as The Visionary struts his way out. Rollins swaggers right past McIntyre in his green storm pattern suit, and steps into the ring first. McIntyre frowns as he follows Rollins in, and sits in a corner. The fans continue to sing, which Rollins revels in for a moment. Rollins has the mic to then say, “RALEIGH, NORTH CAROLINA~! Welcome to Monday Night Rollins~!

“And Drew, hah, sorry, I didn’t even see you there. I was too busy, uh, y’know, soaking up the spotlight, right?” McIntyre has a mic to say, “Alright, here we go.” Here goes what, Drew? McIntyre says no, no, get it all out of your system, he knows Rollins has more! McIntyre can stay in the back while Rollins enjoys the spotlight, because after WrestleMania, that spotlight’s all McIntyre’s. Hey, hey, c’mon. Rollins is here with an honest cause. Rollins doesn’t like McIntyre, he thinks he’s stupid, a hypocrite, has said a lot of dumb things lately, but Rollins is here to admit that one thing McIntyre said is absolutely right and he wants to say it to McIntyre’s face, right here in Raleigh, in front of the fine people.

Now, they always say the first step to recovery is the hardest, so bare with Rollins. He has been working on this all week, but… “My name is Seth Freakin’ Rollins, and I’m a spotlight junkie.” The fans chant “Spotlight Junkie!” and also sing, but McIntyre says everything is just a joke to Rollins, isn’t it? Look at Rollins! He’s a parody of himself at this point. But honestly, McIntyre doesn’t care. He tried reasoning, he gave the answers, and now he only cares about their match and the world title. And you wanna know the real punchline, funny man? “What?” McIntyre says they say that because they’re happy McIntyre sidelined Punk, thanks for remembering!

But the punchline is when McIntyre beats Rollins for that title. The fans chant for “C M PUNK!” but McIntyre says don’t be ridiculous. Punk’s waiting until next week to return because he’d never show up in a place like Raleigh. The fans boo but McIntyre says see, they’re booing Punk! Punk is only getting off his couch to be at his local arena. Rollins tells McIntyre to shut up already. Oh, seems McIntyre got Rollins’ attention. Rollins takes off the sunglasses to say yeah, McIntyre has his attention. Because this isn’t a joke! When Rollins says he is a junkie, it isn’t a joke! He’s been doing this for 20 YEARS! Just like McIntyre!

And every time Rollins comes out of the curtain, that’s his fix. And it gets better and better every single time. Rollins comes out here, lays it all on the line, and it just gets better and better! When he hears the fans sing the song so loud, Rollins can barely speak, “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~!” That’s Rollins’ fix! That is the spotlight he craves, and y’know what? Rollins wants the spotlight as bright as it can possibly be. So yeah, McIntyre’s been busy online entertaining people with memes, so he hasn’t been listening to Rollins. So Rollins will get this through McIntyre’s thick skull: Night One, Rollins takes the biggest star in Hollywood and his side chick, and makes them his b*tches!

Then on Night Two, the biggest spotlight possible will be shined down on McIntyre and Rollins and the World Heavyweight Championship! McIntyre says all hail the savior, Seth Rollins! This is what McIntyre wanted! The passion and desire, not the stupid laughing and dancing. Rollins had McIntyre all the way to the finish. Rollins has done this 20 years, just like McIntyre. They’ve given their lives to this industry, and that is what the title is about! The wrestlers’ title, the workhorse championship! Rollins had McIntyre with him until he mentioned the bigger spotlight and how Rollins pins one of the biggest stars in the world.

Why can’t it just be about Rollins’ hard work to make that title, and all of McIntyre’s hard work to get this chance? Why can’t that be the reason they’re getting the biggest spotlight!? Rollins has had his priorities all backwards, McIntyre has been giving him all the answers. McIntyre said he is over the BS, and all he cares about is Rollins making it to the ring on Night Two. And if Rollins can’t walk, then McIntyre will wheel him down. If not, McIntyre will carry Rollins down. At Mania, McIntyre doesn’t get the moment he deserves. He gets the moment he has bloody EARNED. The fans do cheer that!

Rollins smirks and says, “Ah, Drew. There it is. That’s right, you wanna call me a spotlight junkie, but you want the spotlight just as bad as I do, don’t you? You’re an addict, just like I am. And you’ve been begging for spotlight for the past four years, because you won the WrestleMania main event. You did, back in 2020, in an empty warehouse. And all we’ve been hearing from Drew McIntyre for the past four years was how that wasn’t good enough. You’ve been whining and complaining and bitching and moaning that you deserve better, that you deserve more. The problem is, Drew, when everybody came back around, and the lights got bright again, what happened? You fumbled the ball.

“And that’s the difference between you and me. When the lights are the brightest, I shine, baby. I shine bright. And at WrestleMania 40, the lights are gonna be as bright as they have ever been. And you are gonna find out you are not as good as you think you are.” Rollins drops the mic, but this time McIntyre smirks. The verbal battle continues, but who will put their money where their mouth is once this one finally happens?

 

Becky Lynch speaks.

“I’m a wanted woman, and I don’t even have the title. Yet. But we’re less than three weeks away from WrestleMania, so why would I risk it all? Because I don’t know anything else. All I know is taking risks. All I know is fighting. And all I know is tonight, I’m gonna be the Last Woman Standing.” Becky is fired up to finally do what she hasn’t done in the most extreme way possible. Will she be the immovable object to Nia’s irresistible force?

 

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match Qualifier: The New Day VS The Alpha Academy!

Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods have been W, W, E, World, Tag, Team, CHAMPIONS~, but they’ve never been a part of a title match as big as this Six Pack Ladder challenge! Will they look to be part of history once again? Or will Akira Tozawa & Otis say “A THANK YEW~!” for this golden opportunity?

Raw returns as the Academy makes their entrance. The teams sort out and Woods starts against the tree trunk, Otis. The fans rally for “NEW! DAY ROCKS!” Otis and Woods tie up, but Woods kicks low then headlocks. Otis powers up and out then runs Woods over! Otis storms up on Woods, GUT RAMS him back down, then brings him back up. Otis GUT RAMS Woods again, then runs to CLOBBER Woods! Otis swivels his hips, the fans echo “Oh~ yeah!” Otis tags Tozawa and the Academy mugs Woods. Tozawa brings Woods around but Woods CHOPS! Woods tags Kofi, he and Kofi double whip Tozawa but Tozawa holds ropes!

Tozawa fires hands, dodges Woods then BOOTS Woods down! Kofi kicks low, whips Tozawa to a corner, but Tozawa BOOTS Kofi away! Tozawa goes up to FLYING RANA! The fans fire up as Tozawa sees New Day regroup outside. Tozawa runs to DIVE! Direct hit on both New Day, and Otis joins in for “A THANK YEW~!” The Academy stands tall as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Tozawa fights a chinlock. Tozawa reaches for Otis but Woods back suplexes. Tozawa lands out to then DROPKICK Woods down! The fans rally as Woods and Tozawa crawl, hot tags to Otis and Kofi! Otis CLOBBERS Kofi, CLOBBERS him again, then whips him to ropes. WRECKER ELBOW! Woods runs in, Otis dodges, to LARIAT! Otis sees Kofi leap off the corner, and catches him for a WORLD’S STRONGEST SLAM! Otis rips the shirt off, winds up the hips, and then starts up the CATERPILLAR! ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Kofi survives but Otis hurries to step on him! Tag to Tozawa, and Otis goes up!

Otis VADER BOMBS but FLOPS as Kofi moves! Tozawa hurries up top while Kofi SUPERKICKS Otis! Kofi turns around into the CROSSBODY from Tozawa! Cover, TWO! Tozawa SUPERKICKS Kofi but Woods tags in! Woods GAMANGIRIS Tozawa, then steps in to TORNADO DDT! Cover, TWO! Tozawa toughs it out but Woods grits his teeth as he goes to the corner. Woods climbs, but Tozawa rises! Tozawa throws body shots, Woods CLUBS Tozawa! Tozawa throws more hands and climbs up! The fans rally as they brawl up top! Tozawa brings Woods up but Woods fights the lift! Woods throws body shots in return!

Woods shifts position to get under Tozawa for a fireman’s carry! But then Tozawa pops up to SUPER STEINER!! Tozawa rips off his shirt, climbs back up top, SUPER SENTON!! Cover, Kofi breaks it! The fans fire up but Otis drags Kofi out! Otis whips Kofi at steps, Kofi goes up and jumps off the steps to TORNADO DDT to the floor! Kofi hurries back up to the apron but Tozawa SCREW HIGH KICKS him down! Tozawa dodges Woods, pop-up, but Woods blocks the rana to then SPINNING POWERBOMB! Woods sees the WrestleMania sign, hurries up the corner, and he tightrope walks! LIMIT BREAK ELBOW!! Cover, New Day wins!

Winners: The New Day, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

The New Day are the ones saying A THANK YEW~ as they put their names down for the Six Pack Ladder Match! Will they once again climb to the top of the WWE Tag Team Division and bring home those championships?

 

Liv Morgan confronts Becky Lynch.

Becky asks if she’ll have to watch out for Liv as well. Well, you should always #WatchMe, but no, not tonight. Nia is all Becky’s. Liv just wants Becky to kick Nia’s ass. Liv leaves, will Becky kick ass and then some?

 

Cody walks with his dog, Pharaoh, backstage.

Rollins finds him and brings up Friday. One on one? One on one. Rollins nods and says he loves Pharaoh’s bandanna. The Visionary trusts the American Nightmare can handle himself, but will we be able to trust The Tribal Chief?

 

Last Woman Standing: Becky Lynch VS Nia Jax!

From the origins of “The Man” in WWE to the aftermath of Elimination Chamber: Perth, these two have battled, but never as brutally as this! They’re able to go anywhere and do anything, but who will be the Last Woman Standing this close to WrestleMania 40?

The bell rings and the two rush in! Becky DROPKICKS Nia and Nia goes to a corner. Becky runs in but Nia puts Becky on the apron. Becky ROCKS Nia, goes up a corner, then leaps to MISSILE DROPKCIK! Nia stumbles and tumbles out of the ring, so Becky WRECKS her with another dropkick! Becky then goes to the apron for a FLYING FOREARM! Nia stays up, Becky tries again, but Nia dodges! Fireman’s carry and Nia POSTS Becky, to then SAMOAN DROP her into barriers! The ref counts as Becky is down, but she stands at 4 of 10. Nia CLOBBERS Becky and wants the count! The count climbs but Nia is impatient.

Nia clears off the desk, Becky stands at 5 of 10, and she leans against barriers. Becky comes back with body shots and haymakers, but Nia ROCKS her with a forearm! Becky staggers away as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Becky is bringing out a table! The fans fire up as Becky sets that up ringside. There’s been a lot of chaos during the break according to commentary, from chairs to kendo sticks to even a copy of Becky’s book, The Man: Not Your Average Average Girl! But Nia storms over to stop Becky and SMACK her off the desk! Nia puts Becky in the ring, takes that table for her own and sets it up. The table doesn’t cooperate and fans boo, but Nia goes for chairs instead. She slides those in the ring, Becky manages to stand at 7 of 10, and she grabs at those chairs. Nia ditches the table, it just doesn’t wanna work.

Nia storms in but Becky JAMS her with a chair, SMACKS her with it, then clinches! Nia fights the slam, fireman’s carries Becky, and FULL METAL SAMOAN DROPS!! Becky writhes from hitting chairs but Nia looms over her. Nia soaks up the heat as she counts along. Becky flounders to ropes and drags herself up at 7! Nia sits a chair up, fans want a table, but Nia scoops Becky. Becky slips around to a SLEEPER! Nia RAMS Becky into buckles again and again until Becky lets go. But then Becky BULLDOGS Nia off the chair! Nia is down for the count now, and Becky leans against ropes to stay up herself.

Nia stirs at 5, stands at 8, but Becky is up top! Becky leaps, into a CHAIR SHOT! Nia SMACKS Becky again and again and again! The fans boo but Nia finally stops. Nia puts that chair aside and goes out to get some kendo sticks! Nia puts those in, but Becky grabs one! Nia snatches it from her to SMACK! And SMACK! And SMACK! Becky sputters and staggers, Nia clinches and scoops! Nia SLAMS Becky onto chairs! Then Nia runs to drop the leg, brother! Nia wants the count and the count begins! Becky sputters as we reach 5 of 10. Becky grabs that kendo stick but Nia SMACKS Becky with a chair! And again!

Nia kicks Becky around, then uses the chair to take a seat on Becky’s body!! The fans boo as the count begins, but Becky SMACKS Nia with the kendo stick! And again and again and again, even in the butt! Nia stands up, into more shots! Becky stands and she fires away until Nia scurries out of the ring! Becky pursues but Nia CLOBBERS her! Nia pulls the steel steps apart now, and takes that top half to RAM Becky down! Becky flounders, Nia hauls her up and puts her in the ring. Becky’s on the apron and Nia takes aim! Nia runs up, APRN LEG DROP only gets apron! Becky avoids disaster, then has Nia by the steps! DDT onto the steel!

Nia is down again and the count begins. Nia stirs at 5 of 10, sits up at 6, but Becky SMACKS her off steps! Nia falls over again and the count resets. Becky hurries to go looking for things while Nia rises again. Becky has a new table! The fans fire up as Becky gets that in the ring. Nia stands at 7, staggers after Becky, and Raw goes back to break.

Raw returns once again and Nia mugs Becky against barriers! Nia puts Becky on a table, and surprise! There’s a ladder set up now! Nia climbs the ladder?! She also demands Pat support the ladder. But Becky gets off the table so now Nia has no reason to be up there. Nia storms after Becky, but gets a FIRE EXTINGUISHER BLAST!! The fans fire up as Becky cools Nia off, then JAMS her with the canister! Becky puts Nia in the ring, and there’s a table waiting in a corner! Becky lines up the shot, and runs in, but Nia SAMOAN DROPS Becky through the table!!! Both women are down in the wreckage and the count begins!

Nia flounders away from the wreckage but she still needs to stand. Nia is up at 5, and she isn’t satisfied with this! She drags Becky all the way to another corner and puts her in the drop zone! Nia climbs up, for the A-NIA-LATOR!! Nia shouts for the count, the count begins, and Nia storms around as she points to the Mania sign. Becky is still down at 5 of 10, only starts stirring at 7, and she slumps out of the ring to stand up! Nia is furious, goes out after Becky, and kicks things aside to keep after her. Nia asks if Becky’s vision is blurry. Nia fireman’s carries Becky up the steel steps and along the apron, aiming for that other table!

The fans freak out but Becky fights with elbows! Becky CLUBS away on Nia and the fans are thunderous! Becky then clinches, for a MANHANDLE SLAM through the table!!! Both women are down int he wreckage again, and the count begins! Becky sits up at 4 while fans are still losing their minds! We pass 5 of 10, then 7! Nia sits up at 8 and stands at 9! But then she slumps back over! The count starts again, Nia flounders around and stands at 5. Becky goes up the ladder! Becky sees Nia approaching the desk, and then SUPER MAN’S LEG DROP through the desk!!! The fans lose their minds again while both men are down in more wreckage!

The count is 5 of 10! Becky flounders and crawls, drags herself up at 9, but Nia is still down! BECKY WINS!!

Winner: Becky Lynch

The Man conquers truly one of the most intense challenges in her career! But then here comes one of the most intense champions! The fans fire up as Rhea Ripley makes her way out, Women’s World Championship in hand. She goes right to the ring and looks at Becky. Rhea “congratulates” Becky for winning, but then Becky gets in Rhea’s face! The fans fire up, and now there are no obstacles in the way of Mami VS The Man! Who will be the champion after WrestleMania 40?


My Thoughts:

A great Raw right here, though the in-ring action kinda dipped down until that awesome Last Woman Standing main event. This is one of the times I wish they’d done picture in picture so we as the TV audience could see even more action. Great win for Becky, of course, but I also like that Becky had a moment with Liv just before, and of course she had a moment with Rhea to close out the night. Great promos with Sami and Gable that also blended into the contract signing from tonight. And I suppose Gable has a point that Sami, the comeback kid, can’t do that when Gunther has an arsenal of moves that would be “finishers” given all the different ways Gunther has won over the years.

And speaking of that contract signing segment, I really liked the segue they did in following Sami so that he’d cross paths with Awesome Truth at gorilla and we’d get their segment going into their match. WWE has been doing some really creative stuff in this newest era where Vince is truly out and apparently even Kevin Dunn has moved on. Awesome Truth had a really fun but also really quick tag match with Indus Sher, and then New Day VS Alpha Academy was solid stuff, but DIY VS Creeds was such an awesome match. For a moment, I thought Creeds were gonna take this one but DIY still found a way, and I like that DIY is in. Honestly, I’m liking that the HHH favorites are getting in, because we also have New Catch Republic on the other side that can still win into the match.

Judgment Day had good stuff tonight, too. Good group promo with Andrade to tease El Idolo possibly joining, but who knows if he does. Depends on how things go for Priest. He was watching the qualifiers, he’s not worried, but maybe he should be. Granted, he still has the MITB briefcase, he could go from losing the tag titles to taking the world title, who knows how the Judgment Day’s story is going to go as we move past Mania. Dom VS Ricochet was a really good match, and Ricochet winning was the right move to keep this feud going. I think there’s going to be Ricochet VS McDonagh next week as a rematch from the gauntlet, that’ll be great stuff, too.

Candice’s Heel turn slow burn continues as she takes advantage of the “hurt” leg. Indi also does a good job of being very conflicted about this. There’s a WWE YouTube exclusive where Ivy Nile confronts Candice so that’ll be a match, and then maybe when Candice again goes too far, Indi steps in and we get a match of Candice VS Indi at some point. Good little update promo from CM Punk, he’ll have a great homecoming moment in Chicago, but also probably McIntyre coming after him. McIntyre had a great promo segment with Rollins, and with all these continued moments where the other person gets the mic drop moment, it feels like McIntyre has to win the title.

And of course, great stuff with the Bloodline story even on Raw. Jey and Jimmy have great promos in their confrontation, and of course it turns into a brawl. Good segue from that to Heyman being here, and Heyman confronting Cody during Cody’s great promo segment. Cody really went off on The Rock, that was some wild stuff. But the supposed promise of “one on one and no one else aside from Heyman” might be kept, and we get a strong promo segment on SmackDown in a foreshadowing of the fair-and-square 1v1 match. Or it is a trap and that’s more a foreshadowing of Bloodline Rules where they can do whatever they want. Guess we’ll have to wait and see.

My Score: 8.9/10


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Mitchell’s NJPW New Japan Cup Results & Report! (3/18/24)

The semifinals are here!

Published

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We’re just one step away from the Cup!

Cold Skull faces The Fierce Warrior, and Gene Blast faces The King of Darkness, and when the smoke clears, we will have our New Japan Cup finalists!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Boltin Oleg & Shoma Kato VS Zack Sabre Jr. & Mikey Nicholls; ZSJ & Mikey win.
  • Six Man Tag: El Desperado, Tomohiro Ishii & Togi Makabe VS Just5Guys; Just5Guys win.
  • Tanga Loa & Ryusuke Taguchi VS Great-O-Khan & Callum Newman; Loa & Taguchi win.
  • Six Man Tag: YOSHI-HASHI, Toru Yano & Hiroyoshi Tenzan VS Bullet Club; Bullet Club wins.
  • 8 Man Tag: Shota Umino, El Phantasmo, Hikuleo & YOH VS The House of Torture; Shota, ELP, Leo & Yoh win.
  • Six Man Tag: Los Ingobernables de Japon VS The United Empire; LIJ wins.
  • 2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: Yota Tsuji VS EVIL; Tsuji wins and advances to the finals.
  • 2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: SANADA VS Hirooki Goto; Goto wins and advances to the finals.

PLAY BY PLAY

2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: Yota Tsuji VS EVIL w/ Dick Togo!

The Gene Blast overcame the tricks Ren Narita tried, but that’s because the House of Torture was saving all the good stuff so they could slay the Rampaging Dragon. Will the deck be even more stacked to make sure Everything is Evil’s? Or will Yota be one step away from LIJ VS LIJ at Sakura Genesis?

Well, Dick is making his way out here, but where is Evil? Oh, there he is. No tricks just yet it seems. But then Yota DIVES onto Evil! The fans fire up but Dick attacks Yota! Dick whips, Yota stops himself, and then scoops Dick for a BACKBREAKER! The fans fire up and Yota wants the bell. The ref says yes, ring the bell, and this is on the record! Yota stomps and CLUBS Evil, then whips, but Evil reverses! Yota hits railing, and then Evil whips him into more railing! Evil CHOKES Yota against the railing, Yota fights back, but the ref gets knocked aside! Evil puts Yota in so he and Dick can stomp away!

The fans boo but here comes the rest of the House already! Narita, Yujiro, Kanemaru and Jack all stomp away on Yota, but here come Bushi & Hiromu! It’s a replay of yesterday as LIJ fights off the House, but the numbers are still against them! The ref rushes in to tell everyone to stop! Evil shoves the ref out of the ring, Yota fires off on him, but Evil CLAWS Yota’s eyes! The House CHOKES LIJ, but the ref says stop! The bell rings, but what is the decision!? NO CONTEST!?

No Contest

What does this mean!? Someone has to advance, right? The finals aren’t until the 20th, how can there be a no contest? The House started this, where’re the consequences?! Yota gets up but Evil TOSSES him back out! LIJ regroups and Yota asks for a mic. Yota tells Evil that he’s sick and tired of this! They ARE gonna finish this match! The fans like the sound of that! All the refs come out, including Red Shoes, to discuss how this will be handled. For starters, they tell all the extras to get outta here! LIJ is cool with that, and Hiromu tells the House to come along. Evil says fine, and Jack, Kanemaru, Narita, Yujiro and even Dick reluctantly exit.

The announcement is officially made, and the bell rings! Yota and Evil rush in, Evil kicks low but Yota CLUBS away on Evil! Evil CLAWS the eyes! Evil kicks, runs, RAMS, but Yota rebounds to run Evil over! Then run and SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Yota fires up and the fans are with him! Evil bails out but the fans rally for Yota. Evil wants Yota to stay back, then he slides in, only to slide right out! Yota runs out after Evil, but Evil kicks him! Evil RAMS Yota into the timekeeper! Abe-san and his table go flying! Evil gets the mic to tell Yota that this is what he gets! The fans boo but Evil tells them off, too! Evil stomps Yota then soaks up the heat.

Evil unties the blue buckle pad himself, then waits in the ring. The ref checks Yota and the fans rally up again. The Young Lions help Abe-san while Yota drags himself up. Yota slides in, the fans cheer, but Evil pulls on Yota’s hair! Evil wrenches the hair, then wrenches it again! And again! Evil CLUBS the hair! The ref reprimands but Evil just dusts off his hands. Evil covers, but the ref refuses to count! Evil is furious but he’s the one up to no good! The ref still says no, so Evil stands on Yota’s head. The fans rally up, Yota rises, and he grins as he winds up to ROCK Evil with a forearm! And ROCK him with another!

Yota ROCKS Evil again, but Evil whips him into the bare buckles! Yota falls and the ref reprimands about the missing buckle pad. Evil stomps Yota, covers, TWO! The fans cheer but Evil is annoyed. Evil scuffs Yota, taunts him, and drags him up. Evil CHOPS, Yota drops to his knees, but Evil stands him back up. Evil CHOPS again and Yota grits his teeth as he drops to his knees! Evil stands Yota up again, to fake the chop to CLAW the eyes! The ref reprimands, Evil lets off, and then Evil stands on Yota in a corner. The ref counts, Evil lets go of the ropes but that’s not the problem! Evil steps away, drags Yota up but claims he’s dead weight.

The ref checks, Evil stands Yota up and wrenches an arm. Evil whips Yota into a corner, runs in, but into a BOOT! Evil runs in again, blocks the boot, but Yota brings Evil in for the STOMP! The fans fire up while Yota rests on the mat. The fans rally up and Yota rises again. Evil’s in the corner, runs out, but into the BACKBREAKER! COMPLETE SHOT! STOMP! The fans fire up again as Yota stands back up. Yota runs, to CURB STOMP!! Yota roars and the fans fire up again! Evil flounders while Yota aims. Yota runs in, but the ref is used as a shield! Evil kicks Yota low, then uses the ref in MAGIC KILLER!

All three men are down while the fans rally up again. Evil stands, he brings Yota up, and the ref also rises. Evil whips Yota into the bare buckles, then clotheslines him in! Then FISHERMAN BUSTER! Cover, but Evil lets off?! Evil wants to torture Yota but it’s hard to say if Yota is still even in this. Yota opens his eyes, rises up, but Evil fireman’s carries! DARKNESS FALLS! Cover, TWO!! Yota survives, the fans fire up, but Evil is furious! Evil slashes his throat and vows to end this now! Evil drags Yota up, spins him around, but Yota fights the STO with elbows! Evil kicks low, whips again, but Yota stops from hitting buckles!

Evil runs in, Yota dodges and Evil hits the buckles! SUPERKICK!! Both men are down again and the fans fire back up! We’re only ten minutes into this new match but this is on top of the madness from earlier. Evil drags Yota up, but Yota ROCKS Evil! Evil fights Yota’s fireman’s carry and CLUBS him, but both men wobble. Evil LARIATS, but Yota stays up! The fans fire up but Evil swings to LARIAT again! Yota drops to a knee, but he grins through the pain! Evil says alright, and he throws off his elbow pad. Evil runs to LARIAT! Yota grits his teeth to stay up! V-TRIGGER! Yota brings Evil in, suplexes, ORANGE CRUSH! Cover, TWO!!

Evil is still in this but the fans rally behind Yota again. Yota rises, drags Evil up, and then goes to the corner. Yota goes up and up and Evil moves the ref into the way! The ref takes the FLYING CURB STOMP!!! And now the House returns! The fans boo as Kanemaru, Dick, Yujiro, Narita & Jack all stomp away on Yota again! The fans tell them to go home, again, but these guys don’t care! They just put one out on Yota. They whip Yota to a corner, then DIck runs in to ELBOW! Kanemaru ELBOWS! Yujiro BOOTS! Jack SPLASHES! Narita ELBOWS! Then they snapmare and set Yota up! Dick climbs for the DICK CHOP!!

The fans boo but the House applauds their own dirtiness. But here come Bushi & Hiromu again! But they just get mugged again! They set Hiromu up for the DICK CHOP, while Bushi gets a JACK CHOP! The House then slithers away before a replacement ref rushes out here. Evil drags Yota up, winds up and runs, to LARIAT!! Cover, TWO!!! Yota survives and the fans are thunderous! Evil is at a loss for words, but he slashes his throat! He vows to end it for real, and he reels Yota in. EVERYTHING IS- Yota flips through!? And HEADBUTTS!! The fans fire up as Yota reels Evil in for a fireman’s carry! 70 CROSS!! Cover, TWO!!

Evil survives the swinging spinebuster and the House cheers! Yota drags himself to a corner, drags himself up with the ropes, and roars as he takes aim! Evil rises, but Yujiro distracts! Dick runs in, but gets a V-TRIGGER! The ref sees Dick, but misses the LOW BLOW! Then Evil RAMS Yota into the ref! That’s the second ref this match! Narita gets his push-up bar! The others set Yota up, but here comes SHINGO TAKAGI! The Rampaging Dragon has seen enough, and he’s still pissed from yesterday as it is! He dodges Narita to PUMPING BOMBER! Kanemaru & Yujiro kick Takagi, double whip, but he DOUBLE PUMPING BOMBERS!!

Jack gets in, but he gets ELBOW, JAB and YUKON LARIAT! Evil runs up but Takagi SWATS Evil’s lariat to JAB! Then feed to Hiromu’s SUPERKICK! Hiromu & Takagi set Evil up for Bushi’s BLACK MIST!! Evil can’t see, the PUMPING BOMBER turns him inside-out!! The fans are thunderous as LIJ helps Yota up! Red Shoes hurries out here, and Yota aims at Evil! GENE BLASTER!!! Cover, Yota wins!!!

Winner: Yota Tsuji, by pinfall (advances to the finals)

The House of Torture ran out of tricks, and now there is light at the end of the tournament! Will Yota do LIJ proud and bring home the Cup?

 

2024 New Japan Cup Semifinals: SANADA VS Hirooki Goto!

One down, one to go. Yota Tsuji has made it through, now we see who joins him in the finals! Will the Cold Skull or Fierce Warrior be the one that steps closer to former glory?

The bell rings and the fans duel between “GO-TO-O!” and “SA-NA-DA!” Red Shoes measures the levels, and it seems to slightly favor Goto. Goto and Sanada circle, tie up, and are in a deadlock. Goto gets some leverage to put Sanada against ropes, but he lets off slowly. Goto pats Sanada on the shoulders and the fans cheer. The two reset, circle again, and tie up again. It’s another deadlock, but again Goto finds a way to put Sanada on ropes. Sanada turns things around, lets off slowly, and also pats Goto on the shoulders. The fans applaud and the two reset again. They feel things out, knuckle lock, then move to a clinch.

They fight for control, Sanada starts pushing Goto towards a corner but Goto slips away. They feel things out, knuckle lock again, then break. They tie up collar ‘n’ elbow, Goto waistlocks, but Sanada wrenches to wristlock. Goto rolls, wrenches, wristlocks, but Sanada spins, wrenches, only for Goto to roll! Goto gets a leg to trip Sanada up, and he has a toehold. Sanada fights back with a chinlock but Goto pulls on the leg. Sanada uses his free leg to hook Goto into an ARMBAR, but Goto clasps hands! Goto moves around, pops free, then headlocks. Sanada fights up, Goto grinds the headlock, but Sanada throws body shots.

Sanada powers up and out, but Goto runs him over! The fans rally as things speed up, and Goto counters hip toss with hip toss! Goto runs and he clotheslines Sanada up and out! The fans fire up and Goto slides out after Sanada. Goto stomps Sanada, drags him up, then CLUBS him on the neck! Sanada staggers, Goto CHOPS him, then kicks him, then CLUBS him! Goto whips but Sanada stops himself from hitting railing! Goto runs in but Sanada drop toeholds him into the railing! Goto goes down in a heap, but Sanada opens the gate. Sanada brings Goto through, then to the crowd! PILEDRIVER to the bare floor!

The fans are stunned but Red Shoes reprimands. Sanada leaves Goto behind and slides into the ring. The fans rally for Goto as the ring count begins. Goto crawls at 5 of 20, finds his way to ringside at 10, but still hobbles and crawls. He stands at 17 to slide in! The fans cheer, but Sanada stomps Goto. Sanada drags Goto up, CLUBS him on the neck, then brings him back up to CLUB him again. Goto CHOPS! And CHOPS! Sanada eggs Goto on so Goto CHOPS again! Goto whips, Sanada reverses to RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Cover, TWO! Sanada keeps cool and sits Goto up into a chinlock. Goto endures and the fans rally again.

Goto kicks forward, reaches out, but Sanada cranks on the hold! Goto keeps fighting, and has the ROPEBREAK! Sanada lets go cleanly, but then he stomps Goto while he’s down. Sanada then stands Goto up to CLUB him on the neck. Goto CHOPS in return! And CHOPS, and CHOPS, and has Sanada in a corner! Goto CHOPS again, then whips corner to corner. Goto runs in, but Sanada BOOTS first! Sanada runs, Goto follows, and Goto LARIATS Sanada down! The fans fire up and Goto rises, clutching his neck. Goto stands Sanada up to fire off forearms, then he whips corner to corner. Goto runs in, MURAMASA!

Sanada wobbles, into the SAIDO! Cover, TWO! The fans fire up while Goto grits his teeth. Goto drags Sanada up, fireman’s carries, but Sanada fights free! Sanada waistlocks, Goto throws elbows, then runs. Sanada hurdles, hurdles, and DROPKICKS! Goto tumbles out of the ring, Sanada PLANCHAS him down! The fans fire up and Sanada encourages them to get louder. The fans get louder and Sanada appreciates it. Sanada then goes back for Goto, brings him up and puts him in the ring. Sanada fireman’s carries but Goto throws elbows! Sanada turns around into Goto’s fireman’s carry, but then slips out into the dragon sleeper!

But Goto arm-drags free! Sanada kicks low, runs, but Goto follows! Sanada dodges this time, runs again, but Goto still follows! Sanada sidesteps this time, but Goto holds ropes to avoid the hurdle! Goto runs in, but Sanada fireman’s carries! T K O! Cover, TWO! Goto is still in this and the fans rally up! Sanada goes up the corner, ROUNDING BODY- NO, Sanada has to land out as Goto moves! Sanada runs in, but into the fireman’s carry! USHIGOROSHI! Both men are down and the fans fire up again! They cheer on “GO-TO-O!” but the “SA-NA-DA!” chants are still there. Red Shoes checks them both, and both men slowly rise.

The two crawl towards each other, and Goto fires a forearm! Sanada shakes his head, eggs Goto on, so Goto throws another! Goto eggs Sanada on, so Sanada fires a forearm! Goto fires a forearm back, and the two stand. Sanada UPPERCUTS! Goto comes back to forearm! Sanada UPPERCUTS again, and Goto drops back to a knee! The fans rally, Goto stands again, and he forearms! UPPERCUT, forearm, repeat! Goto growls, fires a flurry of forearms, and he ROCKS Sanada! Sanada drops to his hand and knees but Goto powers up! Goto KICKS but Sanada blocks! Goto fires more forearms, then waistlocks, but Sandaa fights free!

Sanada runs, but Goto fireman’s carries! And he throws Sanada into the dragon sleeper! But Sanada turns around and suplexes, for MAGIC SCREW! Both men are down again and the fans fire back up! Sanada roars as he rises up, and he aims from a corner. Sanada wants Goto to get up, and Goto sits up, into the SHINING WIZARD! Sanada then dragon sleepers, for the SKULL END!! Goto endures, flails, reaches out, but he’s caught in the body scissors! Goto fights around but he’s fading! The fans rally, Goto’s hand drops! Sanada lets him go to then climb! ROUNDING BODY PRESS! Cover, TWO!!

The fans fire up as Goto survives but Sanada storms around. Sanada drags Goto up, reels him in and clinches, but Goto slips free to shove Sanada away! Sanada forearms, ROLLING- HEADBUTT from Goto! The fans fire up and duel, and Goto drags Sanada up. But Sanada breaks free! Goto HEADBUTTS again! Sanada falls back down and Goto steadies himself. Goto roars, the fans are with him, and Goto sits Sanada up. Goto runs to PENALTY KICK! Shoutout to Shibata and the fans fire up more! Sanada grits his teeth as he sits back up but Goto takes aim! BUZZSAW! And then he hauls Sanada up to dragon sleeper! G T- BACKSLIDE COUNTER! TWO!!!

Sanada and Goto hurry up, Sanada dodges to O’Conner BRIDGE!! TWO?!!? Goto escapes and shocks everyone! Sanada resets, runs in, SHINING WIZARD!! The fans are thunderous as Sanada roars and drags Goto back up! Clinch and DEAD- NO, Goto slips around to ripcord and fireman’s carry! G T W!! Cover, TWO?!?!? Sanada survives but Goto is all fired up! The fans are thunderous as Goto dragon sleepers for G T R!!! Cover, GOTO WINS!!!

Winner: Hirooki Goto, by pinfall (advances to the finals)

Don’t call it a comeback, Goto’s been here for years! Sanada’s hopes of being IWGP World Heavyweight Champion again have been delayed, how long must he wait for another chance?

As for Goto, he’s going back to the New Japan Cup Finals for the first time since 2016, and his seventh overall! But before he can get the mic to speak, Yota makes his way back out here. Yota steps into the ring and he gets the mic first. Yota tells Goto, “In order to open the door to a new era, we must do this.” The fans applaud that, and Yota continues by asking Goto, “Are you ready?!” Yota drops the mic at Goto’s feet, and Goto stands up to speak. “I also have something I want to show you. As a three-time New Japan Cup Champion, I will show you my strength.” The fans like the sound of that!

The Fierce Warrior stares down with Gene Blast, a true generational showdown on the horizon! Will Goto return not juts to former glory, but finally ascend to top of NJPW? Or will Yota make it LIJ VS LIJ for the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship?


My Thoughts:

A great semifinal round for this tournament, with quite a surprising main event. Sanada VS Goto was great stuff, and while I felt Sanada wasn’t winning the Cup, I didn’t think he’d be out this round. Yota VS Evil was rather creatively put together, too. I did not think the House would get so involved that at first it was a No Contest but then they restart under a ringside ban. Takagi making sure Yota won was good stuff, too, maybe we can get Takagi VS Evil for the NEVER Openweight Championship if they’re not gonna circle back to more Shota Umino VS House of Torture stuff.

Goto VS Yota is going to be great stuff, and Goto is clearly a top utility guy. He’s had so many New Japan Cup finals appearances, certainly among the most ever, but I don’t think he gets a fourth Cup win against Yota, one of the “new era Musketeers” that NJPW clearly loves. Yota VS Naito is definitely the title match for Sakura Genesis.

My Score: 8.9/10


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