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Mitchell’s WWE WrestleMania 37 Results & Report! (4/11/21)

Who wins THE WrestleMania main event?

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WrestleMania 37 Coverage

WrestleMania 37’s two night adventure reaches its conclusion!

After an epic first night, how can WrestleMania 37 possibly get any greater? Perhaps with Daniel Bryan VS Edge VS Roman Reigns for the Universal title! Will the Head of the Table still be at the helm of the WWE?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Randy Orton VS The Fiend w/ Alexa Bliss; Orton wins.
  • WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler w/ Reginald VS Natalya & Tamina; Jax & Baszler win and retain the titles.
  • Kevin Owens VS Sami Zayn; Kevin wins.
  • WWE United States Championship: Matt Riddle VS Sheamus; Sheamus wins and becomes the new WWE United States Champion.
  • WWE Intercontinental Championship Nigerian Drum Fight: Big E VS Apollo Crews; Apollo wins and becomes the new WWE Intercontinental Champion.
  • Raw Women’s Championship: Asuka VS Rhea Ripley; Ripley wins and becomes the new Raw Women’s Champion.
  • WWE Universal Championship Triple Threat: Roman Reigns w/ Paul Heyman VS Edge VS Daniel Bryan; Reigns wins and retains the title.

PLAY BY PLAY

It’s the WrestleMania 37 Night Two Kickoff Show!

Join Kayla Braxton, Booker T, Jerry “The King” Lawler, JBL and Peter Rosenberg for yet another round of discussing, analyzing and predicting the action tonight!

 

Sonya Deville joins the panel again!

Does anyone really understand the implications of the Nigerian Drum Fight? It might just be Apollo Crews who understands. His power and his culture are going to define what happens tonight. Booker asks, “What do I look like? Chopped liver?” Well okay, he would know, yes. Booker says this goes back a long time ago, the Zulu nation and the Mandingo. This will play out in front of the world so the world needs to understand, and Booker says Apollo will make you understand. Sonya wishes she’d heard more about this. But Jerry wants to know why it’s drums. Booker asks, “What do you do to a drum?” You beat it. Exactly!

Rosenberg says the bottom line is, Apollo is in control. Big E may be on the kick of being in his hometown- JBL asks why Rosenberg’s hands are everywhere. But the point is, Apollo knows what this is about because this is his match. Booker says this will be a great night for everyone back home. JBL and Jerry can’t say anything without getting canceled, so they will agree with him.

 

Ashland Craft sings America the Beautiful!

 

We’ve waited patiently for this moment.

“Finally…!” The biggest event in LIVE entertainment is BACK! Back with the spectacle, the excitement and the pageantry! WrestleMania is #BackInBusiness! And tonight, WWE sets sail on the high seas with epic epicness bigger than the history of history! Wait, what? Did he just say all that? That’s what was written. Okay, mate, let’s get this cold open done right. We pick up where we left off just last year. Our heroes are obnoxiously heroic as they battle for the ultimate prize: immortality. But no more tall tales, let’s get real, as the kids say. Tonight, we witness the global event that spans decades, created unforgettable moments, and has the memories we will remember forever.

But let us tip our caps to you, the fans, who made this possible. You over there, and them up there, and even those at home who “can’t not watch.” We raise the sails as fate still awaits. The course was corrected, the wind cannot be stopped, and the quest continues! Now how’s that? Impressive. But where’s the big finish? That’s cold open 101. Good point. Pyro montage! “Welcome back… to WrestleMania!”

 

The WrestleMania cohosts are back!

Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan return to kick off Night Two of WrestleMania 37, but this time they’re Captain Titus and the Hollywood Privateer! “I dunno about you, Hulk, but I think we look damn good tonight.” Well, T-man, it’s a little hot, too. But either way, AHOY MATIES! Yo ho, brothers, and welcome to Mania Sunday! Last night was incredible, but tonight will be no different! Seven matches, and FIVE are for gold! That means they need to batten down the hatches. No room for scurvy dogs or scallywags! Whoa, don’t be calling the people that. Hogan’s not gonna walk the plank, is he? No, Titus will take care of that. The first match is a tale of terror, dark than the depths of Davey Jones’ Locker! YARRGH!

 

Randy Orton VS The Fiend w/ Alexa Bliss!

The Viper thought he’d finished this at TLC, but some evil never dies. And now, this horror movie in real-life opens the Showcase of the Immortals! Lil’ Miss Twisted Bliss is still by his side, but will Orton finally #LetHimIn?

As he makes is entrance through a mysterious tunnel, The Fiend… has been restored! Alexa makes her way out first, with spooky face paint on to clash with her Punky Brewster outfit. She frolics along, and has a GIANT jack-in-the-box?! Alexa winds the handle and Orton already has an idea what’s coming. All around the mulberry bush, the Fiend chased the Viper~. And out rises The Fiend’s new form! Orton isn’t sure what to make of this, and The Fiend suddenly LEAPS into the ring to CLOTHESLINE Orton down! The bell rings, Fiend SPLASHES in the corner, reels Orton in and hits an URENAGE! Fiend sits Orton up for a NECK SNAP! “YOWIEEEE WOWIEEE~!”

Orton writhes as he clutches his neck and Fiend goes to a corner. Fans fire up as The Fiend spider-walks! Orton gets up, Fiend copies him as he takes aim! Orton flounders up, but he avoids a punt kick! Fiend pursues, Orton kicks low and gives him a back suplex to the desk! But Fiend clamps on with the CLAW! Orton grabs at the ring, gets in, and the ring count is still climbing! Orton gets free but Fiend gets in, only for Orton to kick low. Orton gets Fiend through ropes, for a DRAPING DDT! But Fiend springs right back up! Fiend blocks the RKO, but Orton throws him into his own jack-in-the-box! Fiend flounders, Orton gets Fiend through ropes again and KICKS him!

Orton wrenches the arm, KICKS again, and drags Fiend into ANOTHER DRAPING DDT! Orton looms over Fiend and stomps a hand! Fiend barely flinches, so Orton stomps the other hand! Orton throws hands and clubbing forearms but Fiend just gets up! Orton kicks low, runs, but into a LARIAT! Fiend and fans fire up, things speed up, Fiend BODY CHECKS Orton! Fiend rains down forearms over and over! Fiend gets up to run and drop a back senton, but Orton dodges it! Orton throws Fiend out but Fiend gets right back on the apron. Orton kicks him between ropes, gives away more kicks, then drags Fiend back in, for a THIRD DRAPING DDT!

Orton paces as Fiend slowly stirs. Orton hears the voices and wants Fiend to get up now. Fiend rises, but still no RKO, because Fiend has the MANDIBLE CLAW! Fiend smothers Orton, Orton starts to fade but he grabs at Fiend. Fiend brings Orton up, gives him a kiss good night, and the FLAMES erupt as Alexa is now in a new form! She has a tiara of barbed wire and there’s black ink pouring out. Wait, this distracts the Fiend?! ORTON HITS AN RKO!! Cover, Orton wins!!

Winner: Randy Orton, by pinfall

What is going on with Alexa?! Did she mean to ruin tonight for The Fiend?! Either way, the Viper slithers away before he has to worry about this any longer. Is Orton finally done being haunted by these ghouls? Fiend looks up at Alexa, but the lights start to go out again. And when the lights return, Fiend and Alexa are gone. Just what is happening inside the Firefly Fun House?

 

DING DONG~! Hello!

Bayley asks Titus and Hogan what happened to them texting her back. She says hello to Eric Bischoff, she’s a big fan of his podcast, and says if he ever feels like being on a real show, he can be on hers. Well he’s more of a book guy, not into TV. But that match of Sasha VS Bianca, the SmackDown Women’s Champion on his podcast would be awesome! Yeah, yeah, flavor of the month. But they’re not a role model like Bayley! Bayley is the longest reigning women’s champion, has her own talk show, and is on both nights of Mania! Bischoff brings up Hogan’s new boat, and they decide to go see the boat. Titus wants to ride a boat… Sorry, Bayley, Hall of Famer stuff.

 

WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler w/ Reginald VS Natalya & Tamina!

The Tag Team Turmoil is over, but now the real battle begins! Will the Irresistible Force & Queen of Spades still be standing after battling the Daughter of Superfly & Queen of Harts?

The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and the battle of alpha females begins!

The teams sort out and Shayna and Natty start. They circle, tie up, Natty headlocks and hits a takeover, but Shayna headscissors. Natty kips free but Shayna smirks as the two reset. They tie up again, Shayna headlocks to hit the takeover, but Natty gets up to power out. Shayna runs Natty over, dusts off her hands, then runs. Natty drops, hurdles, but Shayna blocks a hip toss to get a headlock, only for Natty to trip her up! Shayna scrambles to avoid the Sharpshooter, and tags to Nia. Nia and Natty stare down, fans duel, and they tie up. Nia shoves Natty down and says, “I don’t want you.” She’s calling out Tamina! Tamina reaches out, and Natty tags her in!

Fans fire up as Tamina and Nia stare down. Nia pie faces, headbutts and talks trash but Tamina HEADBUTTS back! It’s a battle of headbutts! Tamina fires off haymakers but Nia denies the scoop! Nia runs but Tamina fires off forearms! Tag to Natty, Nia ROCKS her and Tamina! Nia runs, Shayna tags in, Natty & Tamina DOUBLE BACK DROP Nia! Shayna BOOTS Natty, Tamina ROCKS Shayna back! Natty is up, she and Tamina DOUBLE GOURD BUSTER Shayna onto Nia! Fans fire up as Natty gets the legs again and steps through, but Shayna cradle counters, TWO! Natty waistlocks and GERMAN SUPLEXES! Natty drags Shayna up to stomp her down, then tags Tamina.

Natty keeps Shayna from her corner and feeds her to Tamina’s clothesline! Tag back to Natty, Natty gets the hand-off to trip Shayna, and catapult her into a SUPERKICK! Cover, TWO! Natty keeps on Shayna with forearms, then scoops Shayna, only for Shayna to slip out and fire off a strike fest, topping it off with a KNEE! Natty and Shayna are both down, Nia YANKS Tamina off the apron! Tamina fires off on Nia, but Nia scoops her to SLAM her! Natty is shocked, Shayna KNEES her down in a corner! Shayna snapmares to a cover, TWO! Shayna goes after a leg and bends it! Natty endures, kicks with her free leg but Shayna throws a forearm. Shayna pulls on the leg and twists the ankle!

Natty kicks at Shayna more, Shayna turns Natty over and has the foot stuck, to STOMP IT!! Tag to Nia, and Nia looms over Natty as she clutches the foot. Nia soaks up the heat, and drags Natty to drop a leg on the leg! Nia has a standing toehold and Natty endures. Natty fires off haymakers, but Nia stomps the leg! Cover, TWO! Nia is annoyed but she drags Natty up. Natty fights back, Nia CLOBBERS her! Tag to Shayna, Nia has Natty in a STRETCH MUFFLER! Shayna KNEES Natty while she’s upside-down! Cover, TWO! Shayna taunts Natty as Tamina is still down. Shayna SMASHES Natty’s knee into the mat, then pushes Natty around.

Shayna drags Natty up, Nia tags in, and Shayna feeds Natty to a scoop and SLAM! Natty gets to her corner, Nia soaks up heat and runs in, but Natty POSTS her! Natty catches her breath, runs at Nia and throws clothesline after clothesline, then the DISCUS! Cover, TWO!! Nia still has a lot of power but Natty rallies the fans! Natty drags Nia up but Nia headbutts her! Nia reels Natty in, gets her up, and hits the ONE HAND SLAM! Cover, Tamina breaks it?! Tamina is back in this and Shayna is furious! Nia crawls over to tag Shayna in, but fans fire up for Natty as she tags Tamina in! Tamina rallies on Shayna with elbows, then dodges to CLOBBER Shayna!

Shayna blocks a punch to fire off kicks, but she kicks into a DRAGON SCREW! Tamina runs but gets buckles. Shayna blocks Tamina’s boot, twists the ankle, but Tamina BOOTS her down! Nia storms over but Tamina DECKS her! Shayna gets around, wants the Kirafuda but Tamina blocks it to SAMOAN DROP! Cover, TWO!! Tamina grows frustrated but she drags Shayna to a drop zone. Fans rally as Tamina goes to a corner! Tamina climbs up, but Shayna KICKS her first! Tag to Nia, and Nia storms over to get up top! Nia fireman’s carries but Natty saves Tamina! Shayna gets in but Natty CLOBBERS her! But Nia adjusts, DOUBLE CROSSBODY!! Double cover, TWO!!

Natty and Tamina survive but now Nia clutches a leg. That was a rough landing for everyone but Nia manages to get up. Nia sees Tamina is still down, fans rally for Tamina and Nia gets annoyed. Nia brings Tamina up, but Tamina scoops Nia!! Tamina SLAMS NIA!! Cover, TWO!!! Tamina drags herself to a corner, and fans fire up again as Tamina climbs! Tamina aims, SUPERFLY!! BUT SHE FLOPS! Nia moves and Tamina is down again! Nia and Tamina both crawl for their corners as fans rally again. Hot tag to Natty! Natty runs and swipes at Shayna, but Nia gets Natty for a fireman’s carry! Shayna tags in, Natty slips off and DECKS Shayna!

Natty basement dropkicks Nia, and she’s after Nia’s legs! But Shayna’s the legal one! Natty doesn’t know that as she works to get the turn! SHARPSHOOTER, but Nia isn’t legal!! Shayna gets in to get the KIRAFUDA!!! Shayna drags Natty down, Natty endures but she’s OUT! The champs win!!

Winners: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler, by submission (still WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions)

So close and yet so far for Tamina & Natty! Does this mean no team can stop the Irresistible Force & Queen of Spades?

 

Kevin Owens VS Sami Zayn!

Two men who have known each other for two DECADES, ranging everywhere from friends to rivals to bitter enemies, finally have their moment together on the Grandest Stage of Them All! But given the Great Liberator’s ludicrous behavior as of late, the Prizefighter promises to beat some sense into him! Will Kevin snap Sami out of it? Or is Sami too far gone?

WWE Hall of Fame inductee JBL joins commentary for this one to bring back a classic combination of him and #MAGGLE. Sami gets a mic to say, “Please, ladies and gentlemen. I know you’re all just as excited as I am.” Please give a warm WrestleMania welcome for Sami’s special guest of honor, and show some respect to the only ally Sami has had in fighting the conspiracy against Sami! This is… LOGAN PAUL! Logan Paul does walk out to the ring and Sami breaks it down to the theme music again. Sami hugs Logan, and fans are of course divided. Sami apologizes to Logan for the booing. But here comes Kevin! The bell rings and Sami runs, right into a POP-UP POWERBOMB!

Sami flounders out of the ring before Kevin can get him, but Kevin just goes out after him! Kevin brings Sami in and there’s NXT flashbacks as Sami fights the apron bomb! Kevin gets in after Sami, drags him up and CHOPS him! And CHOPS him! Kevin hangs Sami out to dry on ropes and Sami springs right off to hit the mat! Kevin runs in to clothesline Sami down! Kevin goes corner to corner to CANNONBALL! Sami is in a drop zone, Kevin goes up top, but Sami gets out to the apron. Kevin climbs down but walks into a BOOT! Sami reels Kevin in, Kevin elbows free of the half nelson, but Sami kicks low! Sami reels Kevin in, for an APRON BRAINBUSTER!!

Everyone is shocked, even Logan Paul! Sami drags himself back into the ring, Kevin stirs but the ring count is already 5 of 10! Sami wants it to be faster but it’s already at 7 as Kevin stands. Kevin is in at 8 and Sami is on him with furious fists! Sami seethes, kicks Kevin while he’s down, then throws crossface forearms! Logan nods as Sami looks to him, but Kevin throws haymakers! Sami kicks low, scoops Kevin and MICHINOKU DRIVERS! Cover, TWO!! Kevin survives and Sami is furious! Sami goes back to Kevin in a corner, hauls him up to the top rope, and then climbs up to go after him. Kevin resists the superplex, throws heavy body shots, then haymakers.

Sami gives those back, they brawl up top, fans cheer Kevin but boo Sami, until it’s all the same from the pace quickening! Kevin HEADBUTTS Sami down! Kevin adjusts, FROG SPLASHES, and covers, TWO!! Kevin drags Sami up, throws hands, then whips him, to pop-up, but Sami leap frogs and kicks low! Kevin wrenches, ducks a kick, tucks Sami in, PACKAGE USHIGOROSHI! Cover, TWO!! Sami survives and Kevin grows frustrated. Fans fire up with Kevin as he drags Sami back up. Kevin reels Sami in, tucks the arms, but Sami slips out of the package driver to EXPLODER Kevin into buckles! Sami goes corner to corner and HELL-

NO! Kevin dodges the kick, but Sami denies the stunner to BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Sami is losing his cool, but he CORNER EXPLODERS to a HALF ‘N’ HALF! To a BRAINBUSTER!! Cover, TWO!?!? Kevin lives and Sami can’t believe it! “This is Awesome!” and far from over as Kevin gets to a corner. Sami SLAPS Kevin, Kevin SLAPS Sami, it’s a FAST & FURIOUS SLAP FIGHT!! Sami gets the edge, throws body shots and uppercuts, but the ref has Sami back off. Sami gets Kevin up, hauls him up top but Kevin fights. Sami still gets Kevin to the top and he headbutts from below!

Sami climbs, brings Kevin back up, but Kevin counters to a SUPER FISHERMAN BUSTER!! Even Logan is reeling from that one! Both men are down, Sami slowly sits up and drags himself to a corner. Kevin sits up and is in the opposite corner. Kevin grits his teeth, runs corner to corner at Sami to clothesline! Kevin keeps going, and clotheslines again. Kevin goes, Sami follows, HELLUVA KICK!! Sami keeps Kevin from falling over, and tells him this is because of Kevin. Sami goes corner to corner, into a SUPERKICK!! Sami staggers, into another SUPERKICK!! Fans fire up for Kevin as he looks Sami in the eye. “You did this.” STUNNER!! Cover, Kevin wins!

Winner: Kevin Owens, by pinfall

Logan seems to be the only one shocked, but he still applauds this victory! Whether Kevin has knocked some sense into Sami is yet to be seen, but he did get a big win at #KOMania5! Logan checks on Sami, tries to talk with him, but Sami says someone screwed him! The ref, the managers, someone! Logan tells Kevin that this was awesome stuff. Sami won’t let Logan shake Kevin’s hand! Sami says Kevin conspired against him! Sami wants Logan to listen to him, but Logan shoves Sami! Sami says to hell with Logan! Sami storms off, Logan raises Kevin’s hand in victory. Logan sure is a bandwagoner, huh?

Kevin doesn’t like that, either, and he gives Logan a STUNNER!! “This is MY ring!” Will this win lead Kevin back to another prizefight?

 

Matt Riddle encounters Great Khali!

What’s up, bro! Riddle wants to congrat Khali on being inducted into the HOF. Can he check the ring? Yep. WHOA, look how big his hand is! It’s as big as Riddle’s head. Khali must have a hard time finding gloves and socks. Khali should open a store that sells giant stuff! Giant shoes, giant socks, giant toilets, and giant scooters! What does he think? No? Nothing? Translator? Wait, RVD is here!! RVD translates for Khali and says that in order to corner the market, we’ll need creative branding. RVD has that right here with RVD rolling papers.

Sweet! Hey, what about a #KhaliTrolley? Khali and RVD say Riddle should focus on Sheamus. Good luck from Khali and R! V! D! Riddle rides off towards gorilla, but will he be ready to smoke the Fella?

 

WWE United States Championship: Matt Riddle VS Sheamus!

Bro… The Fella has had beef with Riddle since day one, but perhaps it’s just Riddle’s personality being so nonchalant, it’s like he doesn’t care. Will Riddle show Sheamus how serious he can get with the gold on the line?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and bro, this one’s going to be lit!

Sheamus and Riddle tie up, and Sheamus headlocks to throw Riddle down. Sheamus grinds Riddle, Riddle fights up and powers out, but Sheamus runs Riddle right over! Sheamus is on Riddle with an armlock and he digs a knee in. Sheamus pulls the fingers, but Riddle fights up. Riddle throws body shots, ROCKS and CHOPS Sheamus, then CHOPS him more! Riddle has Sheamus in a corner, fires off but lets off as the ref counts. Sheamus ROCKS Riddle back with a body shot! Sheamus stomps Riddle, drags him up and scoops him, but Riddle slips out to get a sleeper! Riddle’s a backpack with the body scissors, but Sheamus RAMS him into buckles.

Sheamus throws back elbows, lets off but Riddle elbows back. Riddle leaps, into Sheamus’ swinging SLAM! Cover, TWO! Sheamus seethes, kicks Riddle while he’s down, and kicks him against the ropes. The ref reprimands, Sheamus drags Riddle up by his face to then IRISH CURSE BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Sheamus clamps onto Riddle, Riddle fights up and throws forearms and fast hands! Riddle backs Sheamus down to a corner, but Sheamus kicks back! Sheamus whips, blocks Riddle’s boot but Riddle keeps kicking! Riddle gets a DRAPING ARMBAR! The ref counts, Riddle lets off at 4, but Sheamus CLUBS him back! Sheamus stands Riddle up for Beats of the Bodhrain!

The ref counts but so do fans, and Sheamus gets 8 before the ref gets 4! Sheamus drags Riddle up for a suplex! Cover, TWO! Sheamus seethes again as he paces. Sheamus goes to a corner, goes up top, but Riddle intercepts with a leap, for a SUPER OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY!?! Fans fire up as both men are down on the mat! Riddle fires himself up as he and Sheamus slowly rise. Sheamus throws hands but Riddle counter punches then fires off palm strikes! Riddle boots, spins Sheamus and PELES! Riddle handsprings and runs to forearm smash! Side to side, forearm smash! BROSPLODER, to the BROTON!

Fans fire up as Riddle reels Sheamus in and suplexes, but he has to try again… JACKHAMMER?!? Cover, TWO!! Sheamus survive Riddle’s #Broberg attempt, but Riddle won’t lose focus just yet. Riddle gut wrenches, but Sheamus turns it around! Riddle wriggles free and kicks from below! Sheamus staggers, but he puts Riddle on the apron. Riddle ROUNDHOUSES, then slingshots, into a KNEE!! Cover, TWO!?! Sheamus Alabama lifts for the ALABAMA SLAM! Cover, TWO!!! Riddle survives again and Sheamus grits his teeth. Sheamus looms over Sheamus, brings him up, and fireman’s carries. Riddle fights free, shoves Sheamus to an apron, but Sheamus hits back!

Sheamus fireman’s carries then shifts, but Riddle escapes to POST and then APRON GERMAN Sheamus down! Riddle then aims for a PENALTY KICK, and SPRINGBOARD FLOATING BRO! Direct hit and fans fire up! Riddle gets Sheamus up and in, goes to the top rope, and hits another FLOATING BRO!! Cover, TWO?!?! Sheamus shocks Riddle, but Riddle drags Sheamus in for the REVERSE ARMBAR! Riddle throws hands as Sheamus endures, and Sheamus powers up to dead lift Riddle, for a POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO!! And into the SLEEPER! Sheamus reaches, crawls, and gets the ropebreak! Riddle lets go fast, and Sheamus hammers away on him!

Sheamus drags Riddle up, smirks as he fireman’s carries, and then carries Riddle up the corner! Riddle shifts, escapes, but Sheamus denies the sunset bomb. Sheamus adjusts up top, but Riddle springs up to ROCK him! Riddle gets Sheamus up but Sheamus counters to the fireman’s carry! Sheamus hops down to hit WHITE NOISE!! Sheamus goes up top for a KING KONG KNEE DROP!! Cover, TWO!?!?! Riddle lives and Sheamus is stunned! Fans rally, Sheamus hobbles back to a corner and fires himself up as he calls his shot! Riddle rises, but he dodges the Brogue to roll Sheamus, FINAL-

NO! No knee, but Riddle dodges to QUE-BRO-DA, INTO A BROGUE?!!? Cover, Sheamus wins!!

Winner: Sheamus, by pinfall (NEW WWE United States Champion)

The Bro tried but couldn’t keep the high, and the Celtic Warrior brought him crashing down! Will Sheamus be the one with his head in the clouds now that he has the gold?

 

WWE Intercontinental Championship Nigerian Drum Fight: Big E VS Apollo Crews!

These two used to be good friends, but the frustration of losing and the desire to reign drove Apollo to despise Big E. Apollo calls upon his ancestors to finally make him a champion, but will Big E finally turn away his most stubborn of challengers?

As Big E makes his entrance, Wale performs it life for Tampa! “Ey, Tampa! You wanna go big? Then say that!” The introductions are made, there are drums, tables, kendo sticks and a gong ringside as the title is raised and this BIG grudge match begins!

Apollo and Big E go right out to get weapons! They each have a kendo stick, both men say to the other, “This is what you wanted!” And they start giving each other SMACKS! Smack for smack but Big E gets the edge! Apollo bails out, Big E pursues to SMACK him again! And another SMACK! “This is what he wanted, Graves!” But Apollo kicks low, only for Big E to bowl Apollo into drums! Big E gets the gong! Apollo boots it away, clubs Big E then SMACKS Big E with a kendo stick! Big E goes into the ring, Apollo dares him to stand. Big E dodges, throws Apollo to the apron and runs to SPEAR him off!! That might’ve been a distance record! Big E puts Apollo in to cover, TWO!

Big E keeps his cool as fans rally up behind him. Big E fetches the steel steps, one of Apollo’s favorites from the months past. But he isn’t settling for the smaller top half. Big E goes big by bringing the base over! Big E goes to the apron, brings Apollo up but Apollo fireman’s carries! APRON DEATH VALLEY DRIVER! Apollo drags Big E in to cover, TWO!! Big E survives but Apollo won’t let off! Apollo throws down angry fists, then goes out to fetch the top half of the steps. Apollo brings those around, sets them on their end, and then he stomps Big E to the apron. Apollo has Big E on the base, he picks up the top half of the steps, and he lines up the shot!

“I’m about to show you the steel!” Big E moves before the steps SMASH down!! Apollo hurries to get to the apron, and he runs at Big E to BOOT him! Big E flounders, Apollo wants him to stand up again, but Big E gives him an Urenag-E to the STEPS!! The ref checks on Apollo but somehow he’s okay to continue. “This is what you wanted!” Big E says Apollo is going to get what he asked for! Fans fire up as Big E fetches a TABLE! Big E puts the table in the ring, sets it up, and then fetches Apollo. Apollo staggers up to his feet, Big E puts him in the ring, but Apollo ENZIGURIS Big E down!

Apollo gets a kendo stick to SMACK and SMACK and SMACK, rapid fire! So fast and so hard, the stick breaks apart! Apollo gets Big E on the table, then heads for a corner. Apollo climbs, leaps, FROG SPLASH but Big E moves! Apollo only gets table! Big E scoops, for the BIG ENDING!! But who is that?!? DABBA KATO!?!? What’s he doing here?!? GRENADE THUMB ATTACK!! And then, a CHOKE SLAM!! He’s helping Apollo to the cover! Apollo wins!!

Winner: Apollo Crews, by pinfall (NEW WWE Intercontinental Champion)

When did Apollo make Kato one of his generals?! The timing doesn’t matter, the results do! And now, Apollo has the title! What will this mean for the future of SmackDown?

 

WWE honors the 2021 Hall of Fame class!

The 2021 Warrior Award winner, Rich Hering stands with the Great Khali, Rob Van Damn, Molly Holly and Eric Bischoff on stage, and are joined by KAAAAAAANE~! And for old times’ sake, the HELLFIRE & BRIMSTONE erupt!

 

Raw Women’s Championship: Asuka VS Rhea Ripley!

The Empress of Tomorrow wanted someone to step up to challenge her, and the Nightmare did just that! Will we see that even now, no one is ready for Asuka? Or will she be washed away by the Riptide?

Rhea has New Year’s Day perform her theme live for her! The introductions are made, the title is raised, and we see who is ready for what!

Asuka and Rhea stare down as fans rally up. They circle, talk some trash back and forth, and Asuka mocks Rhea. Rhea rushes, Asuka dodges and dropkicks! Rhea stays up, but storms into Asuka’s strike fest! Asuka kicks, runs, Rhea follows but Asuka victory rolls! ONE, but Asuka backslides! Rhea rolls through but Asuka dropkicks her to a corner! Asuka runs in, misses the hip attack, but boots back! Rhea snarls, ducks a kick and ROCKS Asuka! Rhea runs but Asuka drop toeholds her into buckles, then KICKS the buck to jam Rhea! Rhea bails out and Asuka grins as fans duel. Asuka eggs Rhea on, Rhea slides in but then right back out.

Asuka goes after Rhea, keeps Rhea from going into the ring to then pop-up KNEE! Rhea gets in the ring now, Asuka follows and has Rhea on ropes. Asuka KICKS Rhea in the back, KICKS again, and again, and again! The ref reprimands, Asuka runs but Rhea dodges the hip attack to HOOK KICK! Rhea drags Asuka right back up to back suplex to a SLAM! Cover, TWO! Rhea is annoyed already as she drags Asuka and rains down fists! “You wanted this! You! Wanted! This!” Fans rally and duel as Rhea keeps on Asuka. Rhea drags Asuka into a body scissors and squeezes tight! Rhea shouts in Asuka’s face but Asuka elbows Rhea’s legs.

Rhea clamps tighter, digs Asuka into the mat and slaps her around! Rhea dares the champ to do something now, then brings her back into the squeeze! Asuka tells Rhea to shut up and she throws elbows. Asuka pushes back to a cover, ONE, and Rhea dropkicks Asuka! Rhea tells Asuka to get that weak sauce out of here. Rhea kicks Asuka around, Asuka hits back and the two brawl. Rhea KNEES low, SLAPS her, then CLOBBERS her! And again! Rhea drags Asuka up again, but Asuka ducks, only for Rhea to ripcord! Asuka blocks the Hook Kick to a KNEEBAR! Rhea endures, fights up, but Asuka pulls tighter! Rhea makes it a cover, TWO, but Rhea dead lift GERMAN SUPLEXES! Cover, TWO!!

Asuka survives and Rhea grits her teeth while clutching her foot. Rhea slaps Asuka around, then CLUBS her in the corner! Rhea drags Asuka up, bumps her off buckles, then kicks her while she’s down. Rhea RAMS into Asuka’s back over and over and digs her shoulder in. Rhea lets off as the ref counts, then puts Asuka up top. Rhea CLUBS Asuka, climbs up behind her, and stands her up, but Asuka blocks! Asuka throws elbows and then knocks Rhea down! Asuka fires up as she adjusts, then leaps for a missile dropkick! Direct hit and both women are down! Fans fire up as Asuka rises and aims at Rhea from a corner. Rhea gets up, Asuka runs in, ROUNDHOUSE! GERMAN SUPLEX!

Rhea flounders to a corner, Asuka runs in to HIP ATTACK! Rhea fights the German but Asuka BACK HANDS, CHOPS and HEEL KICKS! Rhea falls to her knees, Asuka hits another HIP ATTACK! Cover, TWO!! Rhea is in a daze but she is still in this! Asuka goes to a corner, climbs up top again, but Rhea dropkicks her down to the floor!! Rhea wobbles, Asuka gets back in, and Rhea shakes out the cobwebs to go out after Asuka. Rhea blocks Asuka’s boots but Asuka elbows Rhea away! Rhea blocks the Penalty Kick, to SLAM Asuka on the apron! The ring count is climbing, Rhea gets Asuka in at 5 of 10! Rhea hurries to get up but Asuka hip attacks her down!

Asuka goes out after Rhea again, brings her around, but Rhea fights. Rhea can’t get free, Asuka DDT’s her OFF the apron and to the FLOOR! Both women are down and another ring count begins! Asuka gets in at 5, Rhea sits up at 6. Rhea gets in at 7, but Asuka is there, SLIDING WIZARD! Cover, TWO! Asuka grows frustrated but she drags Rhea up for Kowata Kicks! Over and over and over, then Asuka smiles as she runs, but Rhea blocks the sliding kick! Rhea stomps away on Asuka! Rhea puts Asuka’s legs in the PRISM TRAP!! Asuka endures the hanging cloverleaf, reaches for ropes, but rolls Rhea to an ARMBAR!! Rhea flails and kicks, fights up to dead lift again!

Rhea SWINGS Asuka into buckles! Both women are down but Asuka goes to the apron. Rhea storms over, climbs up and drags Asuka up for a headbutt! Rhea brings Asuka up higher, for a DEAD LIFT SUPERPLEX! Cover, TWO!! Asuka still lives and Rhea is furious! Rhea drags Asuka up and clubs her. Asuka shoves free, Rhea waistlocks but Asuka elbows her again. Asuka wrenches to get a takedown! Rhea rolls, but into an ARMBAR! Rhea makes it a cover, TWO, and ASUKA LOCK!! Rhea rolls back to make it a cover, TWO!! Asuka unleashes KICKS! Rhea manages to stay up and even eggs Asuka on. BUZZSAW, but then Rhea ducks the sliding wizard! Pump handle, RIPTIDE!!! Rhea wins!!!

Winner: Rhea Ripley, by pinfall (NEW Raw Women’s Champion)

All it takes is one! And now, the Nightmare becomes the first woman to be NXT UK, NXT and Raw Women’s Champion in her career! Are Mondays about to become a nightmare for every other woman on Raw?

 

Hogan and Titus are back!

Hogan is totally blown away, brother! Titus says on behalf of them both, they send a hert-felt thank you, the fans at home watching on the Peacock and the WWE Network, and those who made it special for everyoen involved: the fans here live at Raymond James Stadium! Bayley storms out because she has just had enough! You kidding me?! Thanking the world and the audience?! But not one mention about BAYLEY. In fact, where is HER pyro?! Hit the pyro!! Oh, there is pyro ready for Bayley.

HAHAHA, YES! Bayley has been carrying the hosting duties on her back this weekend, from the legends to the hall-of-famers to stupid Michael Cole! This is HER time to shine, okay? But wait, here come the Bella Twins! Nikki & Brie don’t even get to start because Bayley said this is HER time! It doesn’t matter what these two twin idiots lookin’ like Elmo want, Cena ain’t here! Nikki SLAPS Bayley, and Brie says Ding Dong, GOOD-BYE! Nikki ROCKS Bayley, Brie hits a KNEE SMASH! The Bellas bowl Bayley down the ramp! Titus repeats, “Ding dong, good-bye!” Will Bayley make sure she isn’t outnumbered before she runs her mouth?

 

WWE Universal Championship Triple Threat: Roman Reigns w/ Jey Uso & Paul Heyman VS Edge VS Daniel Bryan!

The Tribal Chief wants the world to #AcknowledgeHim. The Rated R Superstar wants to take back what was taken from him so long ago. And the GOAT wants to bring back #YEStleMania before he’s reached the end! What happens when all these forces collide in THE main event of WrestleMania 37?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and 10 years ago to the day, we see if Edge is finally, truly back!

Roman DECKS Bryan! Edge hits Roman but Roman puts Edge in a corner and RAMS him! Roman throws clotheslines, Bryan gets Roman with EuroUppers! Bryan whips, Roman reverses and sends Bryan out, for Jey to SUPERKICK! No DQ in a Triple Threat! Jey RAMS Bryan into steel steps, Roman ROCKS Edge with an uppercut! Roman throws Edge out, Jey SUPERKICKS him down! GOTTEE! Roman backs the commentary off to clear off the desk. Jey brings Edge over, but Bryan DIVES into Roman! Jey SUPERKICKS Bryan, keeps after Edge, but Edge whips Jey into steel steps! Jey is down, Edge storms after Roman and clubs him on the back.

Edge bumps Roman off apron, off barriers, and repeat! Roman is a pinball for Edge! Edge POSTS Roman, then storms over to see Bryan still down. Edge gets steel steps and takes the top half off. Fans fire up as Edge sees Jey still down, too, and brings him over to the steps! Edge gets Jey up for an IMPALER to the steps!! But it was double-edged as Edge had to land on the steel, too! Bryan gets up while refs and medics check on Jey. They get Jey up while everyone else is still down, but Bryan gets into the ring. Edge scares Heyman away and gets in the ring. Edge and Bryan stare down while Roman only stirs. Fans fire up as Edge and Bryan start throwing hands!

Edge gets the edge, he whips but Bryan drop toeholds Edge into buckles! Bryan gives Edge YES Kicks in the corner! Bryan hoists Edge up top, climbs up to join him, and SUPER STEINERS, but Edge sunset flips it! TWO!! Edge gets around to EDGE-O-MATIC! Cover, TWO! Bryan is down, Roman is back and he ROCKS Edge! Edge and Roman brawl with the ropes between them but Roman drags Edge up to suplex! Edge resists, suplexes but Roman resists. They fight for suplex control, Bryan slides under to trip up Roman and hotshot Edge! Bryan climbs up and missile dropkicks Edge down! Bryan kips up, fires up and fans are with him!

Bryan drags Edge up, throws EuroUppers, and Edge ends up on ropes. Bryan whips Edge but Edge reverses. Bryan goes up and over and keeps moving, dodges to DIVE into Roman, but into an OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY! Roman stands, Edge WRECKS him with a dropkick! Roman bumps into desk and Edge follows him. Edge CLUBS Roman, puts him in, but Roman runs to LEAPING LARIAT! Roman seethes, fans duel as they cheer and jeer, but Roman locks ‘n’ loads! SUPER- NO! Edge gets him for an IMPALER!! Edge aims at Roman from a corner now, and fans are fired up for something we haven’t seen in quite some time!

Edge dares Roman to get up, and then he runs in, but Roman SUPERMAN PUNCHES! Roman fires up and wants Edge to stand now! “OOOAH~!” Edge dodges the Spear to sunset flip! TWO!! Roman staggers, Edge and Roman dodge, DOUBLE SPEARS!! Shoulders and heads collide and both men are down as fans fire up! “This is Awesome!” already and far from over! Bryan returns! DIVING HEADBUTT to Edge! DIVING HEADBUTT to Roman! Cover on Roman, TWO!! Bryan is surprised but he doesn’t lose his cool. Bryan sees Edge sit up, and gives him a YES Kick! YES Kick for Roman! KICK for Edge! KICK for Roman! EDGE! ROMAN! EDGE! ROMAN! EDGE!

Bryan aims at Roman, BUZZ- NO! Roman sends Bryan at Edge, RUNNING KNEE! Roman reloads but runs into a KICK! BUZZSAW!! Cover, TWO!!! Roman survives but Bryan just fires up! Bryan gets the arms, and gives Roman a flurry of Danielson Stomps! Then the YES LOCK!!! Roman flails, Heyman panics, and Bryan cranks back as hard as he can! Edge CLOBBERS Bryan off the hold! Heyman is relieved but now Edge drags Bryan up. Bryan drags Edge down to a YES LOCK!! Now Edge and his bad neck endure!! Edge claws at the hold, but Roman CLOBBERS Bryan now! Roman rains down furious forearms over and over from all sides! Roman lets off just to throw headbutts!

Roman dead lifts Bryan to POWERBOMB him onto Edge! Roman scrapes Bryan out of the ring, goes out after him, and sees the announce desk. Fans jeer, “Roman Sucks!” but Roman just soaks up the heat. Roman puts the base steps closer to the desk, then drags Bryan up. Bryan is dead weight, the fans taunt Roman even harder, but Roman hauls Bryan up to POWERBOMB him through the desk!! But Edge SPEARS Roman outta nowhere!! Fans lose their minds as all three men are down and out! Edge gets up first, and he drags Roman into the ring. Edge looks around, and fetches not just one but a PAIR of chairs! Edge sets one down, Roman steps on it! They tug o’ war, the chair goes flying!

Roman wants the guillotine, but Edge gets Roman down to a CROSSFACE! Bryan puts on the YES LOCK!! They headbutt each other!! Roman is down, Bryan headbutts Edge into the mat! Bryan fires off his rage into those forearms on Edge!! Fans again say, “THIS IS AWESOME!” as Bryan has Edge’s arms. Bryan gives Edge DANIELSON STOMPS!! Bryan lets off, aims from a corner, and powers up with the Yes Fingers! The fans join in, though there are some “NO” dissenters. Edge gets up, Bryan runs in, into a SPEAR!!! Edge staggers, dodges Roman to SPEAR!!! Cover, BRYAN YANKS THE REF OUT!! Edge can’t believe it, but wouldn’t he have done the same in return?

Edge goes out after Bryan, gets MORE chairs, and brings those to the ring. Edge SMACKS Bryan down with one! Edge puts Bryan in the ring, and has as wild look as he gets the chair again to SMACK Roman! And SMACK Bryan! ROMAN! BRYAN! SMACK, SMACK, SMACK!! Fans are thunderous as Edge puts Bryan onto one chair. And then Edge puts Roman on another chair. Edge has it all lined up and fans go nuts knowing it! Heyman is begging Edge not to, but CONCHAIRTO TO BRYAN!!! But Jey returns, and attacks Edge!! Jey beats Edge down, gets a chair, but Edge SPEARS him down!! Edge SMACKS Jey! And again! And again!

Roman SPEARS Edge!! Roman sets Edge up on a chair now!? Roman gives EDGE a CONCHAIRTO!! Roman drags Edge onto Bryan to double cover, Roman wins!!

Winner: Roman Reigns, by pinall (still WWE Universal Champion)

The Tribal Chief is still the Reigns-ing, Defending and Undisputed, but also the ALWAYS controverted Universal Heavyweight Champion of the world because he still has his Right Hand Man watching his back! Will the Head of the Table ever be removed from the throne upon which he sits? Was this really the last chance Bryan had to bring back #YEStleMania? Was this really the end of the Rated R Superstar’s comeback?


My Thoughts:

I don’t think I have to say it, but I will: Night Two did not live up to Night One. As far as I’m concerned, titles that should’ve changed didn’t and titles that shouldn’t have changed did. Or at least, not in the way they should have. One of the only non-title matches tonight, Orton VS Fiend, was good but not at all what I expected. I thought we were going to get one full match with “mangled” Fiend, but I guess that’s what Fastlane was for. Fiend 2.0 looks pretty good, and goes even further into referencing DC Comics’ Joker. I was hoping that as the first match of the night, we would’ve gotten cinematic fighting so we could get a pseudo Firefly Fun House.

Also, I like whatever that new form Alexa takes, too, but I did not like that she distracted Fiend. Fiend didn’t have to win here, but he didn’t have to lose like that. I don’t like the idea that they’re trying to make it seem like whatever is possessing Alexa is now turning on Fiend just to push this forward in a new direction. And with Backlash sadly being made into WrestleMania Backlash, like a weird third night or something, we are revisiting this to figure out the what and why of tonight. Sigh…

The other non-title match, Kevin VS Sami, was just one degree off what it could’ve been but it was still great. I almost thought that segment at the end with Logan bandwagon’ing to Kevin was going to unite Sami and Kevin against Logan Paul. Instead, they both dislike him, just separate from each other. Maybe one day, Sami and Kevin will patch things up in kayfabe and go after tag titles. And speaking of tag titles, the Women’s Tag Team title match was great stuff, but I really wish Tamina & Natty won that. I do appreciate that Reggie wasn’t ringside to be used for various things, because in the end, Shayna & Nia sticking together does help the division. I just feel that the RawDown Women’s Tag titles need to spend more time on SmackDown than they do Raw right now, out of fairness.

Bayley was pretty entertaining tonight, but the Bellas getting the better of her was clearly a WWE management decision because fans were not for it. And I was surprised Titus and Hogan saved their pirate costumes for night two, those should’ve been night one. Riddle VS Sheamus was another great slug fest, and I like that Riddle referenced Goldberg with a Jackhammer. Seems The Bro hasn’t given up on getting a match with him. But it was an even split to me who could’ve gotten this, so giving Sheamus some vindication was alright.

The Nigerian Drum Fight was pretty good, but I expected the drums to play into it more. And same for the gong as soon as I saw it there. But it was still a very good themed No Hold Barred, just not sure why we needed Dabba-Kato to get involved. Do all Heels in WWE need to have henchmen helping them now? Except for Lashley, at least, since he’s The All Mighty. But Apollo getting the title was the part that was right, as this was his fourth attempt, and losing again would’ve been rough for him. Maybe Big E gets a match with Kato at WrestleMania Backlash, wins that and then starts chasing Apollo going into Money in the Bank or Extreme Rules.

Asuka VS Rhea was an awesome match, definitely worthy of the title and of Mania. But maybe this was just a bit soon for Rhea? Asuka hasn’t really gotten big wins lately, given she didn’t get to have her match with Lacey Evans at Elimination Chamber and didn’t have anything at Fastlane. I mean, obviously what is bad for one is good for the other, and Rhea is rising up fast and keeping pace with Bianca Belair. I wonder if WWE is already thinking that Survivor Series 2021, wherever it will be, will see Rhea VS Bianca as the champions. Hopefully they throw NXT in so Raquel Gonzalez can be part of it.

The Triple Threat Universal Championship match was awesome stuff, and I do like that they took advantage of the No Disqualification stipulation. Jey interfering early was fine, because he gets taken out for it. But him returning and helping Roman again just hurt everything they’d built up. If Roman found a way to use Bryan and Edge against each other to then get the win, that would’ve felt less disappointing. And if not for “WrestleMania Backlash” being next, I would’ve thought Roman was moving right on to Cesaro given Cesaro won on Night One. Instead, there might be that tag match “meant” to happen at Fastlane and WWE going back to the status quo of phoning it in on the minor PPV’s.

My Score: 8.3/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (1/24/22)

Time to weigh in before the Rumble!

Published

on

WWE Raw 2022

Raw prepares for the Royal Rumble!

Before fighting for the WWE World Championship, Bobby Lashley and BRRROCK LESNARRR step on the scales to make this one heavy Monday Night Raw!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bianca Belair VS Queen Zelina Vega; Belair wins.
  • WWE United States Championship: Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens; Kevin wins by disqualification, and Priest retains the title.
  • Six Woman Tag: Rhea Ripley, Dana Brooke & Liv Morgan VS Tamina, Carmella & Nikki A.S.H; Ripley, Brooke & Morgan win.
  • The Alpha Academy Academic Challenge Round 1, Spelling Bee: The Alpha Academy VS RKBRO; RKBRO wins and gets to choose next week’s challenge.
  • Randy Orton w/ Matt Riddle VS Chad Gable w/ Otis; Orton wins.
  • AJ Styles VS Austin Theory; Styles wins.
  • The Mysterios VS The Street Profits; The Mysterios win.

PLAY BY PLAY

Corey Graves is in the ring with Adam Pearce.

Pearce welcomes the fans to the official WWE World Championship weigh-in for the Royal Rumble. “Without further ado, please welcome the challenger, Bobby Lashley!” The Rocky Mountain Machine makes his way out, MVP right behind him, and some pyro added to his pose, and some more pyro in the ring. And of course, the WWE Champion, Br- “Ladies and gentlemen.” Paul Heyman walks out on stage to give his introduction, and says he’s so tired of everyone trying to steal his shtick, especially when no one does it as good as he does.

So about to walk down the aisle and step onto the scale, your REIGNING! DEFENDING! UNDISPUTED! WWE HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD~! BRRROCK! LESNARRR!! Lesnar makes his entrance, wearing a cowboy hat and jeans, and he goes to the ring to join Lashley. But given the attire and the smirk on his face, it’s hard to say he’s taking this serious. Graves points it out, and Lesnar asks if Graves would like Lesnar to get naked. How about just carrying on with this then? Graves says Lashley is the challenger, so he will go first. Lashley throws off his jacket, steps over, and stands on the scale.

The ref checks, and Lashley weighs in at 273 pounds. MVP says, “See that? 273 pounds of All Mighty killing machine! 273 pounds of specimen like no other. Closer to a god than a man. 273 pounds of bottled lightning that Brock Lesnar will have to contend with at the Royal Rumble.” The match so many had written off as impossible is happening. But Lashley knew it was inevitable. 273 pounds, and then after the Rumble, Lashley will gain some weight. The exact amount as that WWE Championship weighs. Lesnar and Heyman laugh that off, and Graves says it is Lesnar’s turn. Lesnar takes off his hat and lets Heyman hold that while he steps on the scale.

The ref checks, and Lesnar weighs in at 286 pounds. Lashley is upset, though. Lesnar thinks this is funny, huh? He’s acting like a fool because he knows Lashley will beat him for the title this Saturday. “Mark my words: this will be the shortest title run of your entire career. And that’s not a prediction. That’s a spoiler.” Lesnar laughs and says, “Well who’s the comedian now? Paul, get this. On Sunday morning, hot off the press, Bobby Lashley beats Brock Lesnar in the Hurt Lock. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new champion! The new reigning, defending, WWE Heavyweight Champion of the world~! Bobby Who?”

Lesnar laughs, takes his leave with Heyman, but it’s only a matter of time. Will Lashley have the last laugh when he’s the one leaving St. Louis with the title?

 

Bianca Belair VS Queen Zelina Vega!

The EST is dressed in gold, because she’s ready to go for gold in the Women’s Rumble! Will the Queen of the Ring merely be a stepping stone on Bianca repeating history?

Raw returns and Vega makes her entrance. The bell rings and they tie up. Bianca scoops and puts Vega on the apron. Bianca then blows a kiss, ducks the haymaker, drags Vega back into the ring and swings her around in the waistlock before a SLAM! Fans rally for the “EST! EST!” and Bianca avoids Vega stomping her foot! Bianca ripcords and whips but Vega reverses, only for Bianca to go up and over. Bianca handsprings, eggs Vega on, then dropkicks her down! Bianca kips up, drags Vega up, and suplexes! Bianca holds Vega up but Vega STUN-DOG MILLIONAIRES! Vega stomps away on Bianca in a corner and digs her boot in!

The ref counts, Vega lets off at 4 to then JUMP KICK! Vega keeps moving, and she KNEES Bianca down! Vega soaks up the heat, takes a bow, and then drags Bianca up. Bianca shoves Vega away, runs in but is sent into buckles! Vega then goes up, but Bianca ROCKS her first! Bianca scowls, trophy lifts Vega off the corner, but Vega fights free to a SLEEPER! Bianca RAMS Vega into buckles but Vega just throws elbows! Vega brings Bianca down to her knees, squeezes tight on the sleeper, but fans rally up. Bianca fights up, RAMS Vega into more buckles and then throws Vega off! Bianca scoops but Vega headscissors, but Bianca handsprings through!

Bianca rallies on Vega, dropkick and kip up! Fans fire up as Bianca brings Vega in for a suplex! Roll through, another suplex, and she even jogs in place before the SLAM! Bianca runs, handsprings, and MOONSAULTS onto knees! Vega grits her teeth, hops on, CODE- NO! No red, Bianca pops Vega off to a torture rack! KISS OF DEATH! Cover, Bianca wins!

Winner: Bianca Belair, by pinfall

Well, she just beat a queen, so this was the royalEST win Bianca’s gotten yet! Will she go back-to-back at the Rumble and return to WrESTleMania?

 

Backstage interview with Kevin Owens.

Kevin Patrick tries to talk with him before his US Championship match but Kevin Owens refuses to talk. K-Peezy points out KO was the first person to give Damian Priest a pinfall loss here on Raw, and KO agrees with that. But he faked an injury. What? What did K-Peezy say? Faking an injury? Is he accusing KO of lying? Has K-Peezy been in the ring? No, he hasn’t, so his opinion is moot. KO says he fought through pain! Just reed his shirt! “Just Keep Fighting.” Now tonight, KO gets his US title match, and guess what he’ll do tonight? Read the third! Just Keep Fighting. That’s right! And he’ll do that until he is the new United States Champion.

WWE United States Championship: Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens!

The Archer of Infamy knows the Prizefighter is two-faced, but now he knows what to expect after being duped into a defeat. Will Priest keep the gold away from KO? Or will Damian make it hard for him to hold back?

Raw returns and Kevin makes his entrance. The introductions are made, the title is raised, and we see who goes into the Rumble with gold already around their waist!

Kevin kicks, Priest pushes him away and fires off in the corner! Kevin dodges to CHOP and CHOP and forearm in return! The ref counts, Kevin lets off but Priest turns things around to fire off fast hands! Priest CHOPS, whips corner to corner, but Kevin reverses. Kevin runs in but blocks the knee to throw the leg down. Priest ROCKS Kevin with an uppercut, then throws more forearms! Priest runs, but Kevin drops to come back and CLOBBER Priest with an elbow! SENTON! Cover, TWO! Kevin argues the count but he goes after Priest in the corner. Kevin stomps, the ref counts and Kevin backs off. Kevin then runs in, but into a choke grip!

Kevin slips out of the choke slam to CHOP and forearm, but he runs into a BOOT! Kevin bails out, Priest builds speed, and Priest goes up the ropes. Kevin gets away, Priest hops down and goes out after Kevin. Priest blocks the superkick and throws Kevin into barriers! Priest puts Kevin back in, but Kevin SUPERKICKS him off the apron! Kevin hurries to the apron, SWANTON onto the knees! Priest was ready this week! APRON CHOKE SLAM! Priest is fired up and so are the fans as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Priest fires off kick after kick then a ROLLING ELBOW! Kevin goes to a corner, Priest hits a back elbow! But Kevin fights off the suplex, only to get a BELL CLAP! And a HEADLOCK DRIVER! Cover, TWO! Priest drags Kevin up, puts him in a corner and hoists him up top. Priest ROCKS Kevin with a right, climbs up, but Kevin hits back! Kevin adjusts and headbutts away on Priest! Then TORNADO DDT! Priest is in a drop zone, Kevin goes up top! FROG SPLASH! Cover, TWO!! Priest survives and Kevin can’t believe it! Kevin argues with the ref but the ref defends it was two. Kevin waits on Priest to get up, SUPERKICK!

Kevin gets Priest back up, whips but Priest holds ropes. Priest BOOTS back, ducks and dodges, to FLAPJACK Kevin down! Then a HEEL KICK! Cover, TWO!! Kevin survives almost being beheaded but Priest keeps his cool. Kevin claims he’s got a bad arm, but Priest doesn’t trust that! Priest stomps away on Kevin at the ropes, but lets off as the ref counts 4. Kevin still says he has a bad arm but Priest KICKS him out to the apron. Priest rushes over, Kevin HOTSHOTS him! Kevin give sup faking and rolls Priest up, with tights, TWO!! STUN- NO! Priest powers out to LARIAT! Priest is fuming, is Damian coming?

Priest KICKS Kevin into a corner, stomps away, fires down hands, but the ref backs him up. Priest still comes back for more, the ref has to push him away again. Priest BOOTS Kevin, fires off more elbows, but the ref calls for the bell!

Winner: Kevin Owens, by disqualification (Priest retains the WWE US Championship)

Damian got the better off Priest, but he still has the belt. Kevin may have gotten the win, but will he think again before pushing Priest’s buttons?

 

Royal Rumble entrees speak.

Rhea Ripley says, “I have a score to settle with Nikki A.S.H. But the one thing that’s consuming my mind right now is the Royal Rumble. This Saturday, it’s every woman for herself, so I’m going to win at any cost. It’s gonna be an absolute nightmare for the 29 other women when I win the Royal Rumble and move on to WrestleMania.”

Dana Brooke says, “Call me crazy, but this year is gonna be my year! As reigning 24/7 Champion, I’m ready any time, at any place. And this Saturday, I’m gonna continue riding that wave, and winning the Royal Rumble.”

Liv Morgan says we’ve all seen her from being happy to be here to the girl that took the Raw Women’s Champion to her limit. We saw her nearly become champion. But at the Royal Rumble, there won’t be “nearly.” She’ll win to become the NEW Raw Women’s Champion.

 

Sonya Deville finds Damian Priest backstage.

He was outta control! When the ref says to do something, he should listen. Or else he’ll get fined, suspended, or worse. So get it under control! Will Priest find a way to contain the rage inside?

 

Six Woman Tag: Rhea Ripley, Dana Brooke & Liv Morgan VS Tamina, Carmella & Nikki A.S.H!

We just heard from one team about the Women’s Rumble, but can they back it all up with actions? Or will they almost have momentum after facing the Daughter of Superfly, the Most Beautiful Woman in the WWE, and the Almost SuperHero?

Raw returns as Dana makes her entrance, followed by Liv. Then Mella makes her entrance, followed by Tamina, and lastly, Nikki. The teams sort out, Mella gets her protective mask while Dana starts with Tamina. They tie up, Dana wrenches to a wristlock, Tamina shoves her away then runs her over! Tamina soaks up the heat, taunts Liv and Rhea, then stomps Dana. Tamina rains down forearms, wraps on a chinlock and she thrashes Dana before clamping on a neck wrench. Fans rally and Dana fights up, Dana throws elbows. Tamina CLUBS Dana, back suplexes, but Dana lands on her feet to tag Rhea! Rhea dropkicks Tamina, then swipes at Nikki!

Rhea DECKS Mella, wrenches Tamina and hits her with short arm clothesline after short arm clothesline! Then a ripcord HEADBUTT, and a sweep to the legs! Rhea runs to basement dropkick! Fans fire up with Rhea, she brings Tamina up but Tamina shoves her away. Rhea comes back to sobat, then she NORTHERN LIGHTS! Bridging cover, TWO! Mella gets in and FABULOUS KICKS Rhea! Liv ENZIGURIS Mella! Nikki kicks Liv for a TWIST ‘N’ SHOUT! Dana SHOTGUNS Nikki, Tamina CLOBBERS Dana! Mella tags in, she pie faces Rhea, and that just pisses Rhea off! Rhea trips Mella, ties up the legs, PRISM TRAP!! Mella taps, Rhea’s team wins!

Winner: Rhea Ripley, Dana Brooke & Liv Morgan, by submission

That mask didn’t protect the legs! Will it protect Mella from being thrown out? but then Nikki SUCKER PUNCHES Rhea! What kind of hero uses a cheap shot?! Will Rhea personally make sure the Rumble is a nightmare for her former friend?

 

The Alpha Academy Academic Challenge Round 1, Spelling Bee: The Alpha Academy VS RKBRO!

In order for Matt Riddle & Randy Orton to earn a rematch for the Raw Tag Team Championships, they have to show their mental strength is superior in a series of challengers! Otis looked a little worried about that last week, but will he and “Master” Chad Gable be able to outsmart the Stallion & Viper? Or will #4PointOtis no longer be top of the class?

Raw returns and Kevin Patrick presides over this challenge. He welcomes to Raw Tag Team Champions, the Alpha Academy. Gable says that was a fine introduction but a terrible explanation. So he’ll put it in a way that even the mindless morons of Ohio can understand. SHOOSH. Tonight is the first in a triad of events over the coming weeks. Fans chant, “You Suck!” and Otis gets upset. Gable says SHOOSH, and realizes vocabulary isn’t Ohio’s strong suit. Triad means three, so there will be three events. These events will prove Gable is a genius, just as his Master’s Degree and 4.0 GPA does. Don’t boo education! If anyone needs it, it’s Ohio.

Now, this will also prove his protégé, his prized pupil, Otis has both the brawn and brains the size of a tree trunk when he and Gable decimate RKBRO into mental submission. Gable is so proud of Otis. And lastly, Gable will use this platform to officially announce that the Alpha Academy are in the Men’s Royal Rumble! And you better believe one of them is winning, and then the Alpha Academy will headline WrestleMania! Thank you! Kevin Patrick then introduces the former tag team champions, RKBRO! Orton & Riddle head to the ring, and Kevin Patrick reminds us that this is a spelling bee. Tonight’s winners will then choose next week’s challenge stipulation.

The champions open, and first up is Otis. Gable says Otis has this, and Otis nervously steps to the mic. Otis’ word is… Emmental. Can Kevin use that in a sentence? A form of Swiss cheese. E-M-M-E-N-T-A-L! CORRECT! Gable is proud and Otis is sure they’ve already got this. First up for RKBRO, it’s Riddle. Fans fire up as The Bro goes to the mic. Riddle’s word is… Calibration. Cali-bro-tion? No, calibration. Can he use that in a sentence? Uh, ok. “A simple calibration is used to set up the system for individual implementation.” Please put that into letters for Riddle. No, Riddle, you have to spell it. Oh, okay, like when he calibrates his scale for measuring ounces and-

Riddle, just spell it then! Right, sorry. C-A-L-I-B-R-A-T-I-O-N. CORRECT! Tied at 1-1 and Riddle is fired up! Gable is now up, and his word is… Disillusion. Gable laughs that one off. He was hoping for a challenger. For the sake of sportsmanship, give him the definition! SHOOSH! He didn’t need it! This is Mr. 4.0, baby! It is the disbandment of a group or organization- No, Kevin said disillusion, not dissolution. D-I-S-S-O-L-U-T-I-O-N! NO, Gable! Wrong word! What?! That was dissolution but Kevin said disillusion. This is a joke! Kevin said the word wrong! Gable says he spelled a word right! But it wasn’t the word that was said.

Orton says maybe Gable can just a freakin’ seat! Orton is ready to get this over with. Then his word and the win is… Well, one of the most commonly misspelled words. Dumbbell. Riddle says Orton has this! And looking at Riddle, Orton has this. D-U-M-B-B-E-L-L. CORRECT! Gable is furious! Dumbbell for Orton? Riddle IS a dumbbell! Gable, shut your mouth! And Ohio, let’s go ahead and shut Gable’s mouth for him! They can go 1v1 right here, right now! Gable is furious, and Orton says Gable is clearly not that smart so maybe he’ll spell out how he’s gonna beat Gable: the three most destructive letters in sports entertainment, R K O!!

Randy Orton w/ Matt Riddle VS Chad Gable w/ Otis!

Raw returns and the match is on! Orton and Gable circle, fans rally behind “Randy! Randy!” and ties up with Gable. Orton headlocks, grinds Gable but Gable fights up. Gable pries the hold, has a top wristlock and he brings Orton down. Otis says that’s the power of leverage, and Gable wernches to a wristlock. But Orton powers out to drop toehold and facelock! Gable moves around, Orton gets away, and the two circle again. They tie up, Gable wrenches, wristlocks, but Orton fights up. Riddle and the fans rally up, Orton wrenches through and headlocks. Gable powers out, Orton runs him over! Riddle is fired up as Gable gets to a corner.

Orton and Gable reset, tie up again, and Gable wrenches to a hammerlock. Orton slips around to hammerlock back, then headlocks. Gable powers out, Orton runs him over, and things speed up. Gable arm-drags, and arm-drags again! Gable keeps on the arm and fans boo as he wrenches the shoulder. Orton fights up, fans keep rallying, and Orton whips Gable to a corner. Gable goes up and over but Orton fakes out the arm-drag! RK- NO! Gable pushes Orton away, and then bails out of the ring to regroup with Otis. Fans boo and a ring count starts. Otis says you can’t RKO someone with no neck! Gable gets in the ring, he circles with Orton and they tie up again.

Orton wrenches to a wristlock, but Gable rolls, bridges, spins and handsprings to spin through and headlock. Gable then spins to the toehold and has the ANKLE LOCK! But Orton slips away and bails out to regroup with Riddle. Gable says it was that close, but Orton keeps his cool. Orton takes his time returning, but Gable throat chops him! Gable CHOPS Orton to a corner, throws body shots and haymakers, but lets off as the ref counts. Gable fires off more forearms, strikes a pose, but then Orton kicks back! Orton fires off EuroUppers over and over, whips Gable to ropes, then CLOBBERS him with an elbow!

Gable bails out again, Orton stalks up behind him! Back suplex to the announce desk! Gable flops to the floor and Otis can only glare as Orton looms over Gable. Fans are all fired up as Orton puts Gable in the ring. Otis gets on the apron, Orton knock shim down! But Gable CHOP BLOCKS a leg! Gable runs, runs Orton over, then hurries up the corner! MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO!! Orton survives and Gable can’t believe it, while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Gable has a standing toehold. Orton endures, Riddle coaches him up, but Gable stomps Orton down! Gable has Orton in a corner, hooks a leg in the ropes, then gets the other for a DRAPING DRAGON SCREW! The ref keeps Gable back but Gable shoots in to get the left leg. Orton CLUBS Gable, whips him but the bad leg gives up! Gable whips Orton into a corner, but Orton comes back to LARIAT! Orton manages to rally, and he dodges to BACK DROP Gable away! Gable goes to a corner, Orton runs in to clothesline! Fans are thunderous for RKBRO as Orton reels Gable in. Gable switches, Orton bucks the waistlock and hits a BACK2BACKBREAKER!

Fans fire up as Otis coaches Gable and Riddle coaches Orton. Orton puts Gable through ropes, drags him out, time to spell “vintage!” DRAPING DDT! Orton slowly gets up as fans fire up behind him. Orton hears the voices and he waits on Gable. Riddle sees Otis getting on the apron and runs over that way. But Otis gets him for an EXPLODER! Orton is distracted, Gable backslides him! TWO, and Orton hits a POWERSLAM! Orton’s bad leg slows him down, but the fans still rally as hard as ever. Orton stands over Gable, then aims from the corner. Otis shouts to Gable, but Orton runs in, only for Gable to dodge the punt! ANKLE LOCK!!

Orton endures as Gable thrashes the bad leg! Fans rally, Riddle CLOBBERS Otis with his scooter! And then again! And again! Gable is distracted, Orton rolls to send Gable into buckles! RKO!!! Cover, Orton wins!!

Winner: Randy Orton, by pinfall

RKBRO gets extra credit on The Alpha Academy! A win in the spelling bee and a win in the ring, but Riddle gets a mic. Riddle congratulations Orton, and reminds us that they get to choose the second Academy Challenge. Riddle thinks it’s time to go old school to gym class! What better way to show some physical prowess than a good, ol’ fashioned… scooter race! Is that really part of gym class? And does Otis even stand a chance of finding a scooter that can hold him up? Will RKBRO make it a 2-0 sweep? Or can Gable find a way to make a comeback?

 

Alexa Bliss continues her therapy.

The doctor thinks they’re making progress. Oh? He asks her a personal question: When was the very first time that Alexa met Lily? Oh, well, Lily’s been around her whole life. Any time Alexa was looked down on or bullied, Lily was there to be her friend. Alexa was just six years old when she met Lily. These two teenage girls picked on Alexa cuz she wore glasses, and they shoved her off the monkey bars. Alexa got knocked out, and when she came to, Lily was there. Those cute button eyes and the braids and stitching. Is that too much? No, keep going. Okay.

That day, Alexa and Lily got ice cream and played on the monkey bars. Lily said those mean girls would never come back, too. Then they ate candy and gumdrops, and they did that game where you stuff marshmallows in your mouth and try to say, “Chubby bunny.” Well, Alexa has plenty more to say, will we get to the bottom of Lily’s hold over Alexa?

 

Vince McMahon talks with Austin Theory.

Vince knows Theory is doing really good lately, especially the selfies. Yeah, look at this one! No, not that one. Well, it did feel good destroying Finn Balor, just like Vince wanted. And in the Rumble, Theory will win and face the champion of his choosing at WrestleMania! That’s exciting. If it’s not too much to ask, maybe Theory could get a late number? Like 26 or 27?Why would Theory think Vince has any influence over that at all? Especially right now, when he should focus on his opponent, AJ Styles. Whoa, as in, former WWE Champion, US Champion, Intercontinental Champion, Tag Team Champion, Grand Slam Champion AJ Styles? Yep! That AJ Styles.

Theory says that’s fine. Sounds good, even! Okay, hang on. Don’t forget your phone. And bring back a really good selfie. Yes, sir! Will Theory be able to be more than Phenomenal here tonight? Or does he finally fall out of favor with Mr. McMahon?

AJ Styles VS Austin Theory!

The Phenomenal One himself just got finished with a bright and shining star with a big ego in Grayson Waller. Will Styles check off another future star in Vince’s newest pet project?

Raw returns and Theory makes his entrance. The bell rings, they tie up, and Theory powers Styles to a corner. The ref counts, Theory lets off to mock Styles’ pose, but Styles keeps cool. They tie up again, Styles powers Theory to a corner but Theory turns it around. The ref counts, Theory lets off, and then he double guns. Styles still stays cool, ties up with Theory and gets a headlock. Theory powers up but can’t power out as Styles holds tight. Theory powers out, Styles ducks the hurdle, rolls Theory up, TWO! Theory fireman’s carries, but Styles sunset flips! TWO, Styles wheelbarrows to a victory roll, TWO! Styles dropkicks Theory right outta the ring!

Fans fire up and Styles takes aim. Slingshot and FOREARM! Direct hit and Theory checks his chin. Styles puts Theory back in the ring, stalks Theory to ropes, brings Theory up and bumps him off buckles. Styles CHOPS, Theory staggers to another corner, but Styles brings him out. Theory kicks but Styles blocks. Theory ROCKS Styles with a forearm, but Styles KICKS Theory’s leg! Theory hobbles to the corner, but Styles storms over. Theory YANKS Styles into buckles! And then throws him down by his hair! Slingshot STOMP, deadlift suplex! Cover, ONE!! Theory is annoyed and he rains down rights before wrapping on a headlock.

Theory grinds Styles but fans rally up. Styles fights up, puts Theory in a corner, but Theory turns things around. Styles dodges to CHOP! And CHOP! Theory falls and crawls, but he throws body shots. Styles KICKS Theory in the side! Styles runs for a BIG knee drop! Cover, TWO! Styles gets Theory up, snap suplexes, covers, TWO! Theory grits his teeth but Styles drags him back up. Theory FLAPJACK HOTSHOTS him! Styles sputters while Theory seethes, and Theory stomps Styles down! Theory drags Styles up, throws forearms, then whips corner to corner. Styles hits buckles hard, and Theory gets in his face! “How’s that feel?!”

Theory throws fists down but the ref back shim off. Theory stands on Styles’ head, but lets off as the ref counts. Theory drags Styles up but Styles DECKS Theory with a forearm! Styles drags Theory up, but Theory suplexes for a GOURD BUSTER! Styles flounders in the corner, Theory hoists him up top. Theory throws forearms, climbs up to join Styles, but Styles throws body shots in return. Styles ROCKS Theory, Theory drops but then somersaults to SHOTGUN DROPKICK Styles to the floor! Fans boo but Theory grins as he looks down at Styles, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Theory has a headlock. Styles throws body shots, Theory knees low. Styles kicks back, then ENZIGURIS! Theory staggers, Styles runs in but Theory catches his crossbody for a BACKBREAKER! Then a SWINGING BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Theory grins as Styles survives, and he stalks Styles to ropes. Theory bumps Styles off buckles, then RAMS a shoulder into his back! And again, and again! Theory lets off as the ref counts, and Theory throws down more fists. Theory brings Styles up, but Styles JAWBREAKERS free! Styles ROCKS Theory with a right, then CHOPS him to ropes. Styles whips, Theory reverses and BACK DROPS! Cover, TWO!

Theory says HE is phenomenal but fans boo. Theory drags Styles up to snapmare and stomp him down! Theory mocks Styles’ pose again, but misses the elbow drop! Theory grits his teeth as he gets back up and runs in at the corner. Styles elbows Theory away, then QUEBRADA DDT! Both men are down but the fans fire up! Theory and Styles are on opposite ends, Styles runs in to LARIAT! Theory kicks back but Styles fires off the Phenomenal Blitz! Styles hits a clothesline in the corner, then suplexes Theory to a NECKBREAKER! Styles runs, SLIDING FOREARM! Cover, TWO! Theory is still in it but Styles keeps his cool.

Styles drags Theory up, fireman’s carries but Theory slips out. Styles ducks the haymaker but not the back elbow! Theory hits a BIG back suplex! Cover, TWO! Theory checks his chin again, drags Styles up and says he’s got this. JAWBREAKER! Styles runs in, but into a BOOT! Theory somersaults for a BLOCKBUSTER! Cover, TWO! Styles survives and Theory can’t believe it! Theory shakes his head, convincing himself he can do this. Theory gets Styles up to throw big forearms in the corner. Theory puts Styles up top, climbs up to join him, but Styles resists! Styles slips through and trips Theory up! Styles waistlocks, but Theory elbows out hard!

Theory reels Styles in, but Styles fights out of the powerbomb! Styles ducks and dodges to PELE! Both men are down again and fans are rallying! Styles reels Theory in, but Theory fireman’s carries! Styles fights free, rolls Theory, CALF CRUSHER!! Theory scrambles, ROPEBREAK! Styles lets go and both men slowly get up. Styles grabs at Theory but Theory holds the ropes. The ref calls the ropebreak, Theory throat chops! But Styles BOOTS back, goes to the outside, but Theory trips up his springboard! High stack, but with ropes! The ref sees that and stops the count! Theory and the ref argue, but Styles ROCKS Theory!

Styles is on the apron, he springboards in, PHENOMENAL FOREARM!! Cover, Styles wins!

Winner: AJ Styles, by pinfall

Now that was phenomenal! Will Styles use this momentum to take the Royal Rumble and that golden ticket to WrestleMania? And what of Theory facing Vince’s wrath?

 

Raw holds a simultaneous interview with Becky Lynch and “Doudrop” Piper Niven.

Commentary wants to start with Piper. This match has been a long time coming, and Piper ran through the rest of the division to- Becky speaks up and asks if this is their first time. We start with the champion. And she’ll start with a champion of “a wee lass named Doudrop.” When she first got her start across the pond, who did she idolize? Becky. Who did she want to face most? Becky. Tell ’em how Becky paved the way, and as the groundbreaker she is, she gave Piper this match. People are asking, “Why would anybody in their right mind choose someone who can clearly out power them? Who can clearly break all their bones with one slam to the mat?”

Maybe that’s the answer! Maybe Becky isn’t in her right mind. Or maybe Becky is that confident in how damn good she is! Or that generous to grant an opportunity to a fellow Celt. Piper speaks up to suggest that maybe, Becky handpicked Piper because Becky is desperate. Maybe ever since she returned, she’s been ducking, dodging and scrambling just to hold onto the title. Maybe Becky thought putting the new girl in would be an easy victory. The only easy thing here will be how easy it is for Piper to break every single one of Becky’s ribs.

Becky wants “Doudou” to hold on there. Becky should be thanked for giving Piper her biggest match, her first title match here, and for paving the way and giving Piper a match at one of the biggest events of the year. If Piper had just said thanks, but no. Piper waited for Becky to get in and offer a handshake, so of course Becky slapped her across the face. And being the bigger person, Becky offers to lead Piper to victory in the tag match. But then Piper splashed Becky, dropped her, left her lying. Becky admits, she didn’t see that coming. But Piper’s in for a rude awakening at the Rumble when she steps in the ring with the #VanGOAT and Becky wins to stay Raw Women’s Champion.

Oh, is Becky done? Piper zoned out when she started hearing that whining, nagging sound, or else she was gonna lose it. But Piper will show gratitude when Becky shows respect. But Becky won’t, she will keep whining. She’s not a goat, she’s a little lamb on the way to the slaughter. The Dome is the slaughterhouse, and the new champion will be Doudrop! Becky says Piper was just another name to fill out the roster before this. Piper needs to know her place. It’s dead space and- Oh, Piper’s getting off the mic? She gonna run? She can’t run from the truth, or from this fight. Becky’s been champ for nearly three years !But then Piper barges into Becky’s room!

Piper and Becky scrap and referees rush in to stop it! Piper says her place is with the title, standing over Becky! Will Piper be the one to make Becky DouDROP that title?

 

Backstage interview with Rey & Dominik Mysterio.

Sarah congratulates Rey on being the WWE 2K22 cover superstar. What does it mean to be among the ranks like Stone Cold, The Rock, John Cena and The Undertaker? Rey says this is so dope. You have no idea what an honor it is to represent. Most superstars spend their careers chasing achievements, from main eventing WrestleMania or entering the Hall of Fame. Being on the cover of a WWE video game is no different, especially when that game is FIRE! Although, the one thing prouder would be seeing Dom on the cover one day. Dom says now Rey’s talking. Dom used to play those games growing up, and he knows he has to create his own legacy to be in those games. That starts Saturday when he wins the Royal Rumble.

Well okay, but that’d mean he has to throw Rey out. That’s not happening, right? Well after last week, he might be first to go! Dom’s got jokes. He’s playin’ right? Dom grins and heads out, but Rey laughs it off. Will “every man for himself” be true even for the Mysterio Familia?

The Mysterios VS The Street Profits!

Rey & Dom won alongside Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins last week, but now they’ll go against each other for some last minute momentum! Who will be on fire going into the Royal Rumble match after tonight?

Raw returns as the Mysterios make their entrance. The teams sort out, Dawkins starts against Dom. They circle, tie up, and Dom headlocks. Dawkins powers out, things speed up, Dom RANAS! Dom throws hands, knuckle locks and CHOPS, then goes up to FLYING ARM-DRAG! Dawkins dodges, Dom keeps moving, Dawkins hits a big back elbow! Cover, TWO! Dawkins drags Dom up, whips him to ropes, but Dom wheelbarrow sand throws Dawkins out of the ring! Rey gets in, holds the way open., Dom DIVES! Direct hit onto Dawkins, and then Rey crossbodies Ford! Rey runs, but Ford throws him out onto Dom!

Dom manages to catch Rey, but Ford FLIES! Direct hit and down goes everyone! Ohio is fired up as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again and Dawkins grinds Dom down in a chinlock. Dom endures, fights up, throws body shots, but Dawkins DECKS Dom with a right! Cover, TWO! Dom is still in this but Dawkins wraps on another chinlock. Dom endures again, fights up, Rey coaches him through it, and Dom gets to his feet. Dom throws more body shots, but Dawkins knees low. Dom ends up in a corner, but he dodges the cyclone splash to kick and TORNADO DDT! Both  men are down and fans fire up! Dawkins and Dom crawl, hot tags to Ford and Rey! Rey dodges Ford to tilt-o-whirl and headscissor! Ford ends up in a corner, puts Rey on the outside, but Rey ROCKS him!

Rey goes up top, leaps, SEATED SENTON! Rey keeps moving, dodges again, but Ford FLAPJACKS Rey down! Ford somersaults, to a SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Rey gets to ropes, Ford whips him, but Rey kicks back. Rey slides under, Dom gets in, and he gives Rey a boost to RANA Ford on tropes! The Mysterios dial it up but Dawkins trips Dom and drags him out! Ford runs in but Rey drop toeholds him to ropes! 6 1 NO! Ford blocks that, gets Rey up in an Electric chair, but Rey victory rolls! The Mysterios win!!

Winners: Rey & Dominik Mysterio, by pinfall

The King of Lucha finds a way to snatch this one away from the Profits! But then Dom gets behind Rey and lifts him up, but Rey RANAS Dom out! Rey tells Dom he needs to try better than that, but then Ford TOSSES Rey! But then Dawkins tosses Ford! Dawkins says he got Ford there! But then the DIRTY DAWGS get in, and they both throw Dawkins out! Roode & Ziggler talk trash, but then the Mysterios and the Profits get in to go after them! It’s a huge scrap, but the Dawgs get tossed! And then the remaining four all square off in their own corners! Will any of these men make it to the end of the Rumble match this Saturday?

 

Backstage interview with Seth Rollins.

Kevin Patrick brings up how the Usos are barred from ringside during the Universal Championship match at the Royal Rumble, and Rollins says that sounds so good. Rollins likes K-Peezy and will give him a little “insider information.” This was never about The Usos, or anyone else but Roman VS Seth, Seth VS Roman. Now they go 1v1 at the Rumble for the title, and historically speaking, Rollins likes his odds. Rollins knows he can beat Roman because he’s already done it. Roman knows Rollins has his number. Roman wants people to think very highly of him, but Rollins is the one who can put Roman in his place.

So speaking of Roman, Rollins is going to pay SmackDown one more visit this Friday, because unlike Roman, Rollins delivers his messages in person. See you Friday, brother! Rollins laughs it up, but will he have the last laugh this Friday? And will this Saturday be the first time Roman gets the better of Rollins?

 

The Miz heads to the ring!

The Hollywood A-Lister promised it last week, and now it’s here! Maryse’s birthday celebration will be here on Raw, and the ring’s already filled with presents! Will all go smoothly for the It Couple this close to the Royal Rumble? We’ll see, after the break.

Raw returns and Miz welcomes us to the Maryse Birthday Extravaganza! It’s a celebration of his wife’s birthday, and then Saturday, we will celebrate The It Couple beating The Grit Couple! So without further ado, welcome the birthday girl, a woman more gorgeous, more sexier and more intelligent than anyone here, Maryse! Maryse makes her entrance, and there’s security at ringside. Miz says he speaks for everyone here when he says, “Open your first gift!” Maryse pulls the veil off a painted portrait of her and Miz as a prince and princess! Miz has done it! She feels even more special than the day she became a mother!

Or when he got her that pink Rolls Royce! Or when he got her that $500,000 ring. Well no expense spared. He got top of the line security to make sure there will be no intruders! They checked the ceiling so there wouldn’t be a Brood Bath! There will be no Edge or Beth here! Miz speaks for all of us when he says, “Open your second gift!” Miz hands it to Maryse, she pulls off the lid, and it’s… A custom hand purse! It says “No limit” on the side because there is no limit to their love. Wait, what’s this big one? Miz thought Maryse got him something. Uh, it’s her birthday. Why would she… Wait, then if he didn’t get that, and she didn’t get that… Then what’s in the box?

SECURITY! Get in here and open the box for Miz! The guard goes up to it, rips the paper away, and it’s all a trick! Miz put the brick that Maryse hit Beth with in a frame! This demonstrates that these two will always be one step ahead of Edge & Beth. Just watch this recap video as proof! Maryse asked Beth to call off the Mixed Tag, Beth refused, Miz tried to jump Edge but failed, but it still distracted Beth enough so Maryse could CLOBBER Beth! Fans boo but Miz & Mrs. just soak it up. Now it is time for everyone to get up out of their seats and sing Happy Birthday to Maryse. On three. One, two, DO NOT BOO! This is a birthday celebration! Stand up and sing!!

Now, one! Two! Three! HIT IT! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you~! Miz is so sour… But here comes EDGE! AND Beth! Edge has the music cut to tell Mike ‘n’ Maryse that they’ve been real clever. But being clever won’t matter on Saturday. All these security guards won’t matter on Saturday. Because Miz & Maryse stepped in it now! They’ve got a pissed off Rated R Superstar, and an extremely pissed off Glamazon on their hands. These two are gonna show everyone why that’s not a good thing. The Grit Couple storms to the ring, CLOBBER guard after guard, and Beth scoop SLAMS the next one! Edge TOSSES another, Beth sends one more into the steps!

The It Couple bail out of the ring, so Edge and Beth tear everything up! Beth SPEARS one guard, Edge SPEARS another! Miz & Maryse freak out over the cake being in harm’s way, but the Grit Couple give a guard a HART ATTACK! Shout out to the days of Beth teaming with Natty. Another guard gets in, he gets a 3D!! A shout out to some of Edge’s greatest rivals, before he BOOTS another guard! Edge sees the cake still standing, and Miz says he better not! Edge drags the guard up, reels him in, and POWERBOMBS him through the cake AND table! The terror on the It Couple’s faces is real this time! Will they even show up in St. Louis for that Mixed Tag match?


My Thoughts:

I have a feeling word got back that last week’s Raw was pretty sad, because they made sure this week’s Raw was really good. Now, a weigh-in segment for a title that doesn’t really have weight restrictions was really just an excuse to get Lesnar and Lashley to interact one more time. But Lashley and Lesnar are both doing really well on the mic these days, and Lesnar being dismissive of Lashley is such a great element of this. It’d be wild if Lashley won this but there’s a good chance Lesnar retains and we still get something of Lesnar VS Roman, title for title. Rollins has a good promo rather late in the night, but him hyping up the SmackDown go-home means something good is coming.

Bianca VS Vega was a short match, as was the Six Woman Tag, but sadly that’s how things are in RawDown these days… But at least we got a great promo segment from Becky and Piper. Piper leaving her room to find Becky and brawl with her was awesome stuff, and their match is going to be awesome stuff, but pretty sure Becky wins. Then they’ll set up Becky VS Bianca at WrestleMania, Bianca finally avenges her SummerSlam loss. Also, Alexa Bliss has to be returning to action during the Rumble. She might not win but she could have a really good showing to reestablish herself. Tonight’s vignette didn’t really do much, it just had her rambling about Lily’s origin story with no serious revelation.

We got a really good US Championship match, but it was a bit cheap for Priest to get disqualified when “Damian” let loose. Maybe Kevin comes back after the Rumble to try again and that builds to a US title match at the Elimination Chamber PPV in February. Styles VS Theory was a great match, too, just wish Vince would’ve let Theory and Finn have a match as good as that. And if Styles was still feuding with Grayson Waller, we could’ve built to Styles & Finn VS Theory & Waller, but nope. Vince has apparently given up on Finn, but not enough to cut him the same way they cut a lot of other great people. What a weird old man.

I loved so much of the Academic Challenge segment. Great promos from everyone, and I love that Gable got so cocky that he went with what he thought he heard and not what Kevin Patrick really said. Then we got an awesome match of Orton VS Gable, that also had the awesome aside of Riddle attacking Otis with the scooter. Now, going with a scooter race next week isn’t really something you’d see in gym class from what I’ve experienced, but it’s definitely a Riddle kind of choice. I’m not sure how, but Alpha Academy is definitely finding a way to win to push this to the third challenge, which RKBRO will win to get a tag title match.

The Mysterios VS Profits was really good, with Ford and Rey really standing out in this match. Mysterios get the win for momentum, but then the Dirty Dawgs get in on things for a nice brawl. I don’t see any of those six winning, though, but maybe the Mysterios come out tag title contenders for after RKBRO and Alpha Academy sort out. And then we got a pretty good final segment. As birthday parties that get ruined goes, I like that Miz swerved us with the giant box and then we get Edge & Beth straight up crashing the party. I spotted the Tate Twins among the security guards that got bodied, I hope that means they’re signing with NXT 2.0. The Grit Couple standing tall here, the math would suggest The It Couple finds a way to win, but who knows, Edge & Beth could defy the math.

My Score: 8.3/10


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (1/24/22)

Washington DC gets Elevated!

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AEW Elevation Coverage

AEW has eight for America’s capital!

Team Taz’s Ricky Starks & “Powerhouse” Hobbs look to clear out Dante Martin’s allies, Matt Sydal & Lee Moriarty, as AEW continues in Washington, DC!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Leyla Hirsch VS Brittany Blake; Hirsch wins.
  • Private Party VS Myles Hawkins & Action Andretti; Private Party wins.
  • Brandi Rhodes VS Willow Nightingale; Brandi wins.
  • The Men of the Year VS Logan Easton Laroux & Mike Fowler; The Men of the Year win.
  • Red Velvet VS Janai Kai; Velvet wins.
  • Santana & Ortiz VS Breaux Keller & Goldy; Santana & Ortiz win.
  • Thunder Rosa & Ruby Soho VS Leva Bates & Jordan Blade; Rosa & Soho win.
  • Ricky Starks & “Powerhouse” Will Hobbs VS Matt Sydal & Lee Moriarty; Starks & Hobbs win.

QUICK NOTES

Great to see Leva Bates back in action, but I have a feeling she and Jordan Blade will put Rosa and Soho over. Leyla Hirsch is in her first match since her Heel turn, so seeing how #LEGITHEEL wrestles compared to when she was a Face will be one to watch. And Team Taz taking on Sydal & Moriarty is going to be great, especially since it ties story in from Dynamite.


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