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Mitchell’s WWE NXT Results & Report! (5/11/21)

To be the best, you gotta BEAT the best!

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NXT Coverage 2021

NXT puts gold back on the line!

Mercedes Martinez challenges Raquel Gonzalez, Santos Escobar must go 2 outta 3 with Kushida, and the NXT Champion looks to END Austin Theory!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Karrion Kross w/ Scarlett Bordeaux VS Austin Theory w/ Johnny Gargano; Kross wins.
  • MSK VS Breezango; MSK wins.
  • Alexander Wolfe w/ Imperium VS Killian Dain w/ Drake Maverick; canceled.
  • Pete Dunne w/ Oney Lorcan VS Leon Ruff; Dunne wins.
  • NXT Women’s Championship: Raquel Gonzalez w/ Dakota Kai VS Mercedes Martinez; Gonzalez wins and retains the title.
  • Kyle O’Reilly VS Oney Lorcan w/ Pete Dunne; O’Reilly wins.
  • NXT Cruiserweight Championship, Best 2 Out of 3 Falls: KUSHIDA VS Santos Escobar w/ El Legado del Fantasma; Kushida wins and retains the title.

PLAY BY PLAY

Karrion Kross w/ Scarlett Bordeaux VS Austin Theory w/ Johnny Gargano!

In the words of the NXT Champion, “Tick tock, time’s up!” Will it be Doomsday all day for The Way? Or can Johnny Wrestling help his boy get one over on Kross?

Johnny and Theory are both stunned seeing Kross’ entrance, but Johnny snaps Theory out of it and coaches him up. Fans chant “TICK TOCK!” as Theory sheepishly gets in the ring with Kross. The bell rings and Theory circles with Kross, but ends up in a corner. Theory dodges, fires off forearms, then knees. Kross shoves Theory away, Theory dodges to dropkick! Kross stays up! And gets mad… Kross choke grips, puts Theory in a corner and BOOTS him down! Theory sits up in a daze and Kross grins at Gargano. Kross drags Theory up, puts him in another corner and TOSSES him across the way!

Gargano and Kross stare down, but Kross runs corner to corner, only for Theory to dodge! Kross avoids hitting buckles, wags his finger, and Theory lariats, but bounces off! Kross LARIATS and down goes Theory! Scarlett smiles as she watches Kross stalk Theory. Kross looms over Theory, fans rally as he wrenches and keylocks Theory and puts him in another corner for a HEAVY body shot! Kross wrenches, keylocks and ROCKS Theory again! Theory falls to his knees, Kross BOOTS him to the mat! Kross has Theory on ropes, chokes him, but lets off at the ref’s count of 4. Kross grins and dares Theory to reach for Gargano, only to STOMP his fingers!

Kross laughs as he looms over Theory again. Kross gets Theory up, knees him low and hard, then bumps him off buckles. Kross runs in but Theory knees him back! Theory runs, into an EXPLODER! Fans fire up as Kross says this is the end! Kross gets Theory up, brings him in, DOOMS- NO! Theory rakes eyes while Gargano distracts the ref! Scarlett protests but Kross bails out. Gargano tells Theory to take advantage of the bad eyes! Theory gets around all the big strikes, and he RAMS Kross into Plexiglas! And then DDT’s him hard to the floor! Fans boo, Theory leaves Kross behind, but Kross gets in at 9.9!

Kross then slides out, Theory goes out after him, Kross scoops and aims, but Theory slips off to POST Kross first! Gargano is even surprised as Theory puts Kross in! BUZZSAW! Theory rains down fists, stomps away on arms and shoulders, then rains down forearms! Scarlett coaches Kross, fans rally up, and Kross knees Theory low and hard! Theory ends up on the apron, Kross storms over but into a hotshot! Theory slingshot somersaults for a SHOTGUN dropkick! Cover, ONE?! Kross shocks The Way but Gargano coaches Theory to keep focus. Theory stalks Kross, runs in and clotheslines in a corner! Then scoops for a FALL AWAY SLAM!

Theory gives a thumbs up to Gargano, but Kross is back up! DOOMSDAY SAIDO!! And then another DOOMSDAY SAIDO!! Kross is winding the hands of time, “TIME’S UP!!” APOCALYPSE ELBOW!! Kross doesn’t cover, either, he rains down forearms of fury on Theory’s head! Kross stares Gargano down as he puts on the KROSSJACKET!! Theory is OUT, Kross wins!!

Winner: Karrion Kross, by submission

This could’ve been called by knockout after what Kross did to Theory! Kross promised to hit harder than life itself, and he may just have! Will Kross do this to everyone on his path? But wait! Finn Balor appears! Fans are going nuts as Prince and Doomsday stare down! Finn says he doesn’t wait in line. He wants his rematch! Kross wants another round, too, so challenge accepted! When and where will these two forces of NXT collide again?

 

BREAKING NEWS!

Next week will be COLOSSAL because Bronson Reed is getting his shot! Will Reed crush Johnny Gargano and take the NXT North American Championship away from him?

 

NXT shares an exclusive from earlier today.

William Regal was talking about tonight’s big title matches, but Leon Ruff walked in. He apologizes for interrupting and says he wants to compete. Regal, however, says that would not be wise after how he was beat up last week. Ruff knew Regal would say that, he checked with the medical team and they said he was cleared. Regal knows that, they report to him. But that doesn’t matter, he won’t allow it. Ruff says that’ snot good enough and he throws things off Regal’s desk! “What do I gotta do?!” Regal says Ruff is NOT competing tonight, and tells him to leave. Ruff storms off, but what will Ruff do to get even with Isaiah “Swerve” Scott?

 

MSK VS Breezango!

Wes Lee & Nash Carter have made an impact as NXT Tag Team Champions, but they have to be careful with the fashionable and formidable Prince Pretty and Lord of the Dance! Will these #MustSeeKids continue to prove their worth?

The teams sort out and Lee starts with Breeze. They circle, fans rally and the two tie up. They go around, Breeze arm-drags and then backs away to lounge on the top rope. Fandango “makes it rain” on Breeze, Lee rushes in but Breeze waistlocks to a snapmare, only for Lee to return with a shoulder tackle! Things speed up, Breeze hurdles, Lee FLIPS, and fans admit that was good. Lee does a shimmy, then hurdles Breeze, but Breeze whips Lee. Lee stops to suplex but Breeze fights that off. Breeze suplexes, Lee lands to waistlock, but Breeze bucks him away! SUPERKICKS collide, and the two shake out their legs. Breeze seems a bit stunned Lee is this quick, but both he and Lee tag out.

Carter and Dango circle, tie up, and Dango wrenches to a wristlock. Carter rolls, handsprings and flips to arm-drag Dango away. Carter wrenches an arm now, whips Dango to a corner, but Dango goes up and over to arm-drag back! Dango swivels hips, things speed up again, Carter dropkicks Dango down! Carter shows off his own hip swivels, Dango kicks low! Dango headlocks, Breeze tags in as Carter powers out. Carter and Breeze drop, and drop, and then drop, Dango eventually runs into Breeze! Breeze headlocks Carter, Carter powers out, and somehow the ref ends up part of this! The ref hurdles, Carter dropkicks Breeze out of the ring! Fans are rallying for the ref!

Breeze and Carter reset, the ref remembers he’s a ref, but fans still say “That was Awesome!” as NXT goes to break.

NXT returns and Fandango has Lee in a headlock. Lee fights up, Fandango knees low then whips him to a corner. Lee manages to dodge to then ENZIGURI Fandango! Lee snapmares Dango, handsprings back but Dango gets under and JAPANESE ARM-DRAGS Lee into buckles! Fandango gets Lee up, FALCON ARROW! Cover, Carter breaks it! Dango is upset, but he drags Lee up and over to tag Breeze. Breeze has the legs, he and Dango coordinate, but Lee disrupts the Fashion Faux Pas with a shoulder tackle! Lee stomps Breeze then stumbles away to tag in Carter! MSK rallies on Breeze with kick after kick, BUZZSAW to DOUBLE STOMPS! And then, the PUSH-SAULT! Cover, Dango barrels in to break it!

All four men are down, the fans are fired up, and all four rise as the fans rally up. Lee and Breeze are on one side, Dango and Carter on the other. Lee and Breeze punch first, but Dango and Carter respond. They go back and forth, Lee and Breeze, Dango and Carter. The brawl moves to everyone’s feet, Lee ENZIGURIS but Breeze SUPER MODEL KICKS! Breeze dodges Carter to SUPER MODEL KICK! MSK is down, Breeze hurries to tag in Dango! Dango climbs and Carter is in a drop zone! Carter gets up fast, though, and SHORYUKENS! Carter climbs to join Dango, but Dango resists the superplex! Dango throws body shots, knocks Carter away, but Carter returns with a JUMPING KNEE!

Carter sees Breezango outside, goes to the corner, SUPER MOONSAULT takes them both down! Fans are thunderous as Carter puts Dango in and tags Lee! MSK coordinates, assisted SHOTGUN dropkick! Breeze tags in as Dango is in the corner, and he gets Lee’s arms! Lee resists the turn, Carter SUPERKICKS! MSK combines, BLOCKBUSTER SPINEBUSTER! Cover, MSK wins!

Winners: MSK, by pinfall

That energy and innovation is why MSK are NXT Tag Team Champions! Breezango show respect to the young champions, but MSK tells Legado that the champs aren’t hard to fine! If they want the titles, come get them! MSK all night and all day!

 

BREAKING NEWS!

Alexander Wolfe is showing signs of the stomach flu, so he won’t be competing against Killian Dain tonight! Will Imperium’s Hatchet Man have to try again next week when it comes to settling things with the Belfast Beast?

 

Johnny Gargano angrily leads NXT Media to William Regal’s office.

Gargano shouts “This sucks!” as he heads for the door. Regal says this is actually rather nice. He doesn’t have a meeting and the door was open this time. Gargano asks if he heard right about next week’s title match. He did hear right! Well that’s real nice, isn’t it? First, Regal feeds Theory to the wolves, then he hates Gargano enough to put him in a match! Regal doesn’t hate Gargano, he respects Gargano’s ability. Then treat him like it! Treat him like the North American Champion! That’s what Regal’s doing! So Gargano’s still facing Reed next week! Good luck.

Gargano grabs for the brass knuckles and Regal tells him not to dare touch that. Gargano takes Regal’s pencil and breaks it! Will Gargano’s anger only cost him when he takes on another huge challenge?

 

BIG news for the next TakeOver!

As first broken by Barstool Sports’ Rasslin’ podcast with Brandon Walker, NXT is back In Your House! June 13, 2021, NXT brings back the retro tradition to make a new tradition of their own! And Todd Pettengill will be back, too!

 

Ever-Rise has an impromptu episode of Ever-Rise Live.

Well not really, they’re just behind commentary.

 

Pete Dunne is in the ring.

“So Karrion Kross has chosen Finn Balor? And y’know what? I don’t blame him. Because we both know I’m the toughest match-up there is. So Karrion, keep ducking me, mate. Cuz sooner or later, that title is mine! Cuz I’m the baddest man in NXT! And see if anyone in the back thinks otherwise, here’s your chance! Try and prove me wrong!” Dunne is issuing an open challenge! But who takes it? LEON RUFF, and from outta nowhere! Ruff fires off hands, Dunne shoves him away, but Ruff comes back with a dropkick! Dunne bails out, Ruff dares him to come back, and it seems Regal’s orders had a loophole! Will this be another rough night for Ruff? Or will he show the Bruiserweight what tough is all about?

Pete Dunne w/ Oney Lorcan VS Leon Ruff!

The bell rings and Ruff fires off on Dunne again! Dunne SPINEBUSTERS Ruff and rains down fists from all sides for that! Dunne goes for an arm, Ruff throws him away and KICKS from the mat! Ruff runs corner to corner but Dunne puts him on the apron. Ruff ROCKS Dunne, goes up and around and under, but Dunne gets the arm to roll Ruff for body scissors. Dunne clamps onto Ruff’s arm, bends the fingers back as far as he can, and Ruff shouts in pain as Dunne tortures the digits! Dunne locks the arm, hammers Ruff in the head, then shifts to twist the wrist. Ruff gets up, fans fire up and Ruff CHOPS! Ruff goes up the corner, on the ropes and SPRINGBOARD RANAS!

Dunne staggers up, but sends Ruff into ropes to then CLOBBER him! Ruff gasps for air, Dunne kicks him in the side then goes after the arm again. Dunne bends the fingers way back, and STOMPS the shoulder! Dunne kicks at Ruff, Ruff crawls to ropes, but Dunne wraps the arm around ropes to bend him back! Dunne chinbars to CHOP Ruff down! The ref reprimands but Dunne drags Ruff up again to SLAP! Ruff CHOPS and CHOPS and CHOPS! Dunne shoves Ruff, Ruff dodges to ENZIGURI! Dunne falls into a BACKBREAKER, Ruff pops Dunne up for another ENIGURI! Ruff goes up to hit a missile dropkick! But Dunne ENZIGURIS on return!

Dunne gets Ruff up, whips, but Ruff rebounds to LARIAT! Ruff keeps moving, leaps, but Dunne DECKS him! Dunn has a TRIANGLE HOLD and throws elbows in over and over! Ruff is OUT, the ref calls it!

Winner: Pete Dunne, by referee stoppage

Ruff is tough, but the Bruiserweight is just that brutal. Will Dunne show no mercy until he’s got the title match he wants? Speaking of no mercy, Dunne grabs Ruff’s hand and SNAPS the fingers!! Will Ruff regret going around Regal’s orders?

 

El Legado del Fantasma speaks.

Raul Mendoza says tonight, we’ll see who the real NXT Cruiserweight Champion is, and that is Santos Escobar. Joaquin Wilde says that while Kushida is champion right now, Escobar brings it home. Escobar himself says that the only reason Kushida is still champion is because Escobar has let him. It stops tonight! Escobar vows that after tonight, he will be Leader of Leaders, Emperor of Lucha Libre, sange y tradicion, and TWO-TIME NXT Cruiserweight Champion! Will the Phantom be able to back up all these words when he must defeat Kushida not once but twice in the same match?

 

Ladies and gentlemen, you’re cordially invited…

…to the greatest moment of your lives! The in-ring premiere, live on NXT in two weeks, Franky Money! Will Monet live up to the hype when she finally laces up her boots?

 

MORE BREAKING NEWS!

It has been made official! Two weeks from tonight, Kross VS Balor the epic rematch happens live on NXT! The NXT Championship will be back on the line, but will the Prince take back his throne?

 

NXT Women’s Championship: Raquel Gonzalez w/ Dakota Kai VS Mercedes Martinez!

Big Mami Cool knew Cobra Kai wasn’t going to cut it against Mean Ms. Martinez, so she took matters into her own hands. Raquel respects that Mercedes paved the way, but she won’t show any restraint against her in the ring! Will Mercedes return the favor when she takes away the title?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and Ricky Desperado’s first defense puts her to the test!

Mercedes goes right after Raquel with heavy hands! And she clotheslines Raquel up and out of the ring! Mercedes goes to the apron and CANNONBALLS! Raquel goes down, and Mercedes scares Dakota off! Mercedes runs and KNEES Raquel into Plexiglas! The ring count climbs, Mercedes refreshes it, and goes out to fire off on Raquel again! Mercedes puts Raquel in as NXT goes picture in picture.

Raquel hits back and CLUBS Mercedes, then bumps her off buckles! Raquel stomps Mercedes, drags her back up and whips her corner to corner hard! Mercedes hits the mat, Raquel looms over her, and then drags her into a chicken wing and chinbar. Mercedes endures being stretched, fights up to her feet, but Raquel throws her down by her hair! Raquel stalks Mercedes, chokes her on the ropes, but lets off as the ref counts. Raquel brings Mercedes around but Mercedes fires off again! Mercedes ROCKS Raquel with an uppercut then bumps her off buckles! Mercedes stomps a mudhole, digs her boots in, but lets off as the ref counts.

Mercedes gets Raquel up to ROCK with another uppercut, then whips her to ropes. Raquel dodges to DECK Mercedes with one right! Raquel scoops and walks around with Mercedes before the SLAM! Cover, TWO! Raquel grows frustrated but she stands over Mercedes. Raquel gives Mercedes toying kicks before she SNAP SUPLEXES! Cover, TWO! Raquel is right on Mercedes with a keylock and chinbar! Mercedes endures, fights and gets a ropebreak with a foot. Raquel throws Mercedes down then covers, TWO! Mercedes gets back to the ropes, Raquel storms over but Mercedes throws body shots. Raquel CLUBS Mercedes down and throws elbows. Cover, TWO!

Raquel argues with the ref as Mercedes gets to ropes. Raquel throws haymakers, lets off as the ref counts, and Mercedes hits back! Mercedes CHOPS and CHOPS and forearms and CHOPS as NXT returns to single picture! Mercedes whips, Raquel reverses and LARIATS! Cover, TWO! Raquel is frustrated again, and she drags Mercedes up by her hair. Raquel whips Mercedes to a corner, runs in to SPLASH, then brings Mercedes out to scoop and SLAM again! Cover, TWO! Fans rally as Mercedes survives, but Raquel drags her into a chinlock. Mercedes endures and throws punches from below! Mercedes gets free, CLUBS Raquel, then fires off more strikes!

Raquel shoves Mercedes, but Mercedes comes back to go after legs! Mercedes gets Raquel down, fires off hands but Raquel throws her out of the ring! Mercedes returns and clamps on a SLEEPER! Raquel flails and scrambles around, and RAMS Mercedes into buckles! Mercedes holds on, Raquel RAMS her in again! Mercedes is holding on tight, but Raquel powers her through to a lawn dart, only for Mercedes to send her into ropes! Mercedes ROCKS Raquel, runs in but misses in the corner! Mercedes dodges the boot to ROCK Raquel again! Mercedes gets Raquel onto the top rope for a DRAPING SWINGING NECKBREAKER!! Cover, TWO!!

Fans are fired up as Mercedes and Raquel are down! Raquel gets to an apron, Mercedes joins her and runs in to SPEAR her onto the apron! Fans are thunderous and Dakota panics as both women flop to the floor! Mercedes hurries to get Raquel up and in at 7 of 10! Cover, TWO!! Raquel kicks from the mat but so does Mercedes! They kick more, Mercedes gets up to stomp and ROCK Raquel, throwing heavy hand after heavy hand! Mercedes runs, but rolls into an ALLEY-OOP into ropes! Mercedes flops out of the ring but Raquel snarls as she crawls after her. Raquel won’t leave it to the count as she drags Mercedes up and RAMS her into barriers!

Raquel brings Mercedes up to lawn dart into the post! Raquel goes in, drags Mercedes to a cover, TWO!! Mercedes is still in this and Raquel is starting to lose her cool. Dakota coaches Raquel, fans rally and duel, and Raquel drags Mercedes up. Mercedes jawbreakers back! Mercedes kicks a leg, throws haymakers, then runs, but Raquel shields herself from the body check. Mercedes stomps Raquel more, throws EuroUppers, then runs, but Raquel LARIATS! Cover, TWO! Raquel hurries to get Mercedes up for a BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Raquel is angry, she gets Mercedes up, but Mercedes fights the bomb off to roll up! TWO, and Mercedes KNEES Raquel down!

Mercedes drags Raquel up, fisherman to the BUSTER! Cover, TWO!?! Raquel survives and Mercedes can’t believe it! Mercedes hurries to get Raquel up by her wrists, fires off KNEE after KNEE into her head, but Raquel dodges the third to BOOT! Raquel hurries to drag Mercedes back up, hooks the leg, DESPERADO BOMB!! Cover, Raquel wins!

Winner: Raquel Gonzalez, by pinfall (still NXT Women’s Champion)

Mercedes put up one hell of a fight, but in the end, it was not enough! Will Raquel continue to knock down those that line up to face her?

 

Isaiah “Swerve” Scott and crew arrive.

They don’t let the cameramen get in their way and even shove one down! #TopDolla AJ Francis tells him to get up, he wasn’t even pushed that hard. What will Swerve, AJF, Ashante “Thee” Adonis and Briana Brandy have to say to NXT after the break?

 

NXT returns and Gargano is getting kicked out from somewhere?

Gargano promises to see Reed next week, and we find that he just finished attacking Reed in his locker room! Reed gets up and says, “Johnny’s a dead man!” But Reed is in no shape to do anything about it tonight, will he have 7 days to grow meaner and madder?

 

Isaiah “Swerve” Scott stands on stage.

He has a mic to say, “It’s about to get real spooky here in NXT.” With that, the “Hit Row” make their first official entrance! Brandy, Adonis and #TopDolla stand with Swerve, strike a pose, and then swagger down to the ring. They get Swerve a chair so he can sit, and he admits he made mistakes in NXT. But the biggest mistake was that he was trying to be something that the fans all thought he was. That’s not Swerve! “Whose house? Swerve’s house?” “Swerve is confidence?” That’s not him! But what is Swerve? “Swerve is a savage. Swerve is disrespectful. Swerve is a very dangerous man.” And that’s how he’s been the last six months.

So it only felt right to recruit those who felt just like him! Staring with Top Dolla! Why he Top Dolla? Because from the NFL to A&E to XXL Magazine to NXT on USA, he makes top dolla everyday! He’s nefarious, scariest, make you digest each line like lariats! Anyone want a beef? He gonna bury ya! You don’t know what’ sat stake, you become vegetarian! Quick question? Who hotta than Top Dolla? Not nada! Adonis has three rules. First, details are crucial. Second, don’t try him, proceed with caution. And third, check your energy when you come around them or you gonna get WORLDSTAR’D! Whoa, alright, relax, no one else is out here.

Brandy says you just have to look at her and you’ll understand she’s fab. They see it! Brandy IS fab. But unlucky for everyone else, she’s also legit. She’s been on tour with Juicy J, been overseas and coulda stayed, but Swerve said he needed a mind, so she didn’t mind. She’s the dime who makes the deals, like last week with Leon Ruff. Who? That boy’s a done deal. They put money on Ruff’s head so Dolla dropped him! Swerve says this is fun and all, but look at what’s in the ring right now! “This here is a problem! Together, we produce hits! We are Hit Row! And if you didn’t know, now you know!” Will these four hit the top of the charts and get gold as easy as breathing?

 

Cameron Grimes went to a local auction today.

The auction was for a beautiful lakefront home with 8 bed, 6 baths, a full Jacuzzi and a deck overlooking the lake. The bidding starts at two MILLION dollars! But Cameron Grimes said, “Hold the phone!” He asks Mr. Alan if it’s for two, then put him down. Yes, sir, please have a seat first. Grimes says no problem. Two million? Two fifty? Three? Grimes can’t keep up, why’s he talking so fast? The numbers climb, Grimes says everyone should just stop now as he goes for four million. Five million! Five and a half! Grimes is getting annoyed. Who is that? Six million! Seven! Eight MILLION! Grimes is confident, but then someone says TWENTY MILLION!?!? Grimes can’t handle that!

Who spends 20 million on a house?! The winner is TED DEBIASE!! Grimes loses his mind again and says Ted is ruining his life! Grimes dares him to bring it on! DeBiase says it again, everyone has a price for the Million Dollar Man. And Grimes is no Million Dollar Man. Grimes shouts, “WHYYYY~!?” But when and where, if at all, will Grimes finally get even with the living legend?

 

Zoey Stark speaks.

“I was a big fan of Toni Storm before I got here. She is exactly what she says she is: a global superstar.” The problem is, Toni stopped performing and started talking. Toni said Stark was pissing her off as a “flavor of the month” that was losing her taste. Toni does not like Stark, but not because Stark beat her, but because she outworks her. Stark practically lives in the gym, moves around in the weight room, puts in the hard work to be a success, and then beat Storm. We get a rematch next week, and it won’t be an upset but a legit victory because Storm is going to face a wrestling machine! Will Stark ride the lightning and end #ToniTime before it begins again?

 

Kyle O’Reilly VS Oney Lorcan w/ Pete Dunne!

While #CoolKyle wants another go at the NXT Championship, but the Boston Brawler says he just can’t get it done! Kyle knows Lorcan is itching for a fight so he’s giving him a fight on live television! Will Kyle use Lorcan as a launching pad back into the top title scene?

The bell rings, Kyle and Lorcan circle, and they tie up. They end up on the ropes, the ref counts and the two reset. Kyle and Lorcan tie up again, Lorcan gets an arm but Kyle gets them to the ropes again. The ref counts, the two back off, and then go again. Lorcan powers Kyle onto ropes, lets off, but swings a chop! Kyle dodges, kicks but Lorcan blocks! Lorcan gets a facelock, floats all around, gets the arm, and drags Kyle down to a headscissor. Kyle moves around, rolls Lorcan over to get the legs then float to a headlock. Kyle shifts his grip to then get an arm. Lorcan fights free, fights up, and puts Kyle in a corner. The ref counts, Lorcan swings but Kyle ducks to hit back! And again!

Kyle headlocks, grinds Lorcan, but Lorcan powers out, only for Kyle to run him over! Things speed up, Lorcan BLASTS Kyle down with that back elbow! Lorcan bumps Kyle off buckles, whips him corner to corner hard, and Kyle hits the mat! Lorcan looms over Kyle, taunts him, and has him at the ropes to shove and CLUBS him in the back! Kyle flops to the apron, Lorcan goes after him through the ropes, but Kyle gets a HANGING ARMBAR! The ref counts, Kyle lets off, and Dunne is right there. Kyle stares Dunne down but Lorcan CLBOBERS him from behind! Fans boo and Kyle writhes as NXT goes to break.

NXT returns and Lorcan knocks Kyle down with a straddle attack! Lorcan rains down rights, but lets Kyle get up so he can CHOP him to a corner! Lorcan talks trash right in Kyle’s face before he CHOPS him! Kyle hits back, Lorcan CHOPS again, repeat! Kyle manages to stay up, KICKS back, but Lorcan blocks a kick to elbow the knee! Lorcan runs in to back elbow Kyle in a corner. Lorcan goes corner to corner but into a kitchen sink knee! Kyle gets Lorcan up, clinches and fires off knees, then SLAPS and knees and KICKS! Kyle sweeps the legs, fans fire up! Lorcan goes to a corner, Kyle runs in, and hits a BIG forearm smash! Kyle wrenches to an ELBOW BREAKER and BIG back suplex!

Kyle gets a HEEL HOOK! Lorcan goes for his own but rolls to a ropebreak! The ref counts, Kyle lets off fast and KICKS Lorcan’s leg! Lorcan CHOPS back, Kyle KICKS, repeat! Kyle knees low, reels Lorcan in for a facelock but Lorcan fights off the guillotine, only to get a KNEE to the chest! Kyle gets Lorcan up, BRAINBUSTER! Kyle goes to a corner, climbs up top, KING KONG KNEE DROP!! Cover, Kyle wins!

Winner: Kyle O’Reilly, by pinfall

Dunne fires off on Kyle! Kyle hits back but Lorcan returns! Lorcan get Kyle down so Dunne can STOMP Kyle’s head! The 2v1 mugging continues, but BOBBY FISH returns! He fires off KICKS on Dunne and Lorcan! Fish DECKS Lorcan, SPLASHES Dunne, but Lorcan comes back. Fish elbows Lorcan away, BOOTS Dunne out, and Kyle KICKS Lorcan down! Fans are fired up as reDRagon has reunited! Well, not quite. Kyle says he is doing his own thing, and Fish respects that, because he has his own scores to settle with Dunne and Lorcan. Will these two finish what the Bruiserweight and Boston Brawler started, but not together?

 

“In a world…”

“…filled with evil and uncertainty, two women overcame every obstacle and found a way to achieve their destiny.” The NEW NXT Women’s Tag Team Champions are Indi Hartwell and Candice LeRae, of The Way! Cheesy superhero movie stuff aside, will Indi & Candice lead the way into the future?

 

Bronson Reed speaks.

“JOHNNY, GARGANO! I am sick to death of you! I am sick to death of Austin Theory, and I am sick to death of The Way!” Reed talked with William Regal, and he has given Reed what he wants! The North American Championship match is now inside a STEEL CAGE!! Will this already colossal match going full metal be the way Gargano’s reign ends?

 

NXT Cruiserweight Championship, Best 2 Out of 3 Falls: KUSHIDA VS Santos Escobar w/ El Legado del Fantasma!

The Time Splitter dethroned the undisputed Cruiserweight Champion right after TakeOver: Stand & Deliver because of the arrogance of Escobar’s open challenge. But now, Escobar has returned to take this title away! This will settle things so that there are no excuses! Will the Emperor of Lucha be better than the Super Junior twice to solidify his legacy?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and perhaps the most important match in this division’s history main events NXT!

Escobar kicks and clubs Kushida right away! Then he throws Kushida out! The ref keeps him in the ring but Legado makes a move! Kushida is ready and he hits them first! Then MSK FLIES in from the barriers! Lee & Carter aren’t going to let Wilde & Mendoza ruin this, and also get in some shots before their own inevitable title match! Lee ROUNDHOUSES, Carter KNEES, and the ref has to tell them all they’re EJECTED from ringside! Good enough for MSK! Escobar is pissed, but he doesn’t see Kushida climbing! He turns around, Kushida SUPER SWANTONS! Direct hit and the CWC is thunderous as NXT goes to break!

NXT returns and Kushida runs but into a dropkick! Escobar catches his breath, drags Kushida from ropes, and has a Half Crab that he gets a side angle on so he can fishhook Kushida’s face! The ref reprimands, Escobar drags Kushida up and puts him in a corner. Escobar CHOPS Kushida down, hoists him up top, and then CHOPS him again! Escobar climbs up to fireman’s carry, for a TOP ROPE GUTBUSTER! Kushida flops to the steel steps below, Escobar goes out after him to throwback to their previous match! Boston Crab into the post! The ref counts, Escobar lets off because he can’t waste a fall, and he goes into the ring. Kushida KICKS, Escobar fires off forearms!

Escobar whips, drop toeholds, then gets the legs to hook them up. Escobar clubs Kushida, gets his arms, and brings Kushida into the ROMERO SPECIAL! Kushida endures the floating surfboard, Escobar throws him down and then reels him into a deep camel clutch! Kushida still endures, Escobar shifts to shoot the half on a cover, TWO! Kushida gets to a corner but Escobar kicks him down! Escobar stands Kushida up, fires forearms, but Kushida fires them back! Escobar BOOTS Kushida, KICKS him, then stalks him back to a corner. Escobar digs his knees in and chokes Kushida on ropes, but the ref counts. Escobar lets off, to then pull Kushida back against ropes!

The ref counts, Escobar lets off, he stomps Kushida and kicks him around. Escobar drags Kushida up, throws more forearms, then runs corner to corner to DOUBLE KNEE Kushida down! Fans rally and duel while Escobar talks trash to Kushida. Escobar gives more kicks, more haymakers, and more CHOPS! Kushida staggers, Escobar puts him back in the corner and ROCKS him! Escobar puts Kushida up top, climbs up to join him, but Kushida shoves him away! Escobar comes back to bring Kushida down for more haymakers! Escobar climbs up so he can rain down punches and he gets 10! The fans duel, Escobar soaks up the heat, and he puts Kushida up top to CHOP!

Escobar climbs again, and SUPER STEINERS, but into a sunset flip! TWO!! Kushida is after an arm, Escobar whips him away, but Kushida handsprings and back elbows! Kushida whips to hip toss, cartwheel and dropkick Escobar down! Kushida fires up but Escobar KNEES him first! Fireman’s carry and PHANTOM DRIVER!! Cover, Escobar scores a fall!

Escobar: 1; Kushida: 0

The Emperor has the first point and is now in control! Fans rally up and Escobar runs in, DOUBLE KNEES to Kushida! Escobar runs, but Kushida jumps to get a body scissors! Kushida drags Escobar down, gets the arm and has the ARMBAR!! Escobar knows he’s stuck, so he TAPS!

Escobar: 1; Kushida: 1

In the blink of an eye, we’re back to square one! It all comes down to this, who will be NXT Cruiserweight Champion?! Both men recover as NXT goes picture in picture!

Escobar shakes out the bad arm while Kushida is in a corner. A ring count could still settle this but Escobar gets in. Kushida runs corner to corner to dropkick Escobar down! Kushida stomps and stomps and then rains down fists! Kushida lets off to get Escobar up and wrench the arm. ARMBAR BULLDOG! Kushida stands over Escobar, stands on the arm and hammerlocks it to CRANK it!! Escobar writhes and clutches the elbow but Kushida is after him again. Kushida KICKS the shoulder, Escobar reaches for ropes but Kushida drags him away. Kushida wrenches to another ELBOW BREAKER!

Escobar staggers to a corner, Kushida drags him down and locks the bad arm to then get the good arm and step over. Kushida has the double omoplata and SNAP LOCKS ’em! Escobar writhes, Kushida KICKS him in the leg and the side over and over! Escobar rolls to an apron, Kushida is after him, but Escobar kicks him away. Kushida comes back to KICK the bad arm! Kushida gets the arm, pushes down for a cover, TWO, into a KIMURA! Escobar fights up, Kushida CLUBS the arm and YANKS it! Kushida wants the double wristlock again but Escobar gets up. They go around and around, Kushida stays clamped on and NXT returns to single picture.

They go around and around and Escobar throws Kushida out! Escobar goes out after Kushida but Kushida is right after the arm! Escobar RAMS Kushida into barriers! Escobar hurries inside, Kushida gets him through the ropes! Escobar ROCKS Kushida, but Kushida has the KIMURA again! Escobar HOTSHOTS Kushida down! Escobar builds speed to DIVE!! Direct hit at the ramp with that Arrow from Hell! Escobar puts Kushida in, covers, TWO!! Kushida is still in this but Escobar covers again, TWO! Escobar underhooks the arms, Kushida fights the driver, and he breaks free to wrench and run! Escobar scoops, tilt-o-whirl but Kushida makes it a DDT!!

Both men are down and the CWC is thunderous! Kushida goes to a corner, Escobar slowly gets up. Kushida climbs a corner to AX HANDLE the bad arm! Kushida hits the FAST BALL and the PENALTY KICK! Escobar bails out but Kushida builds speed to slide. Escobar ducks under to waistlock, but Kushida has the arm to ARMBAR BULLDOG again! Fans are fired up as Kushida drags Escobar back up. Kushida puts Escobar in, stalks up behind Escobar, but Escobar avoids the kick! Kushida wheelbarrows to a victory roll, TWO!! Kushida jumps on to body scissor! Escobar makes the Hoverboard into a small package! TWO!! CALF KICK!

Escobar drags Kushida up into the fireman’s carry, but Kushida fights free! Escobar switches, Kushida blocks to sit, TWO, to a sunset! TWO, high stack! TWO, sunset, TWO! Prawn hold, TWO!!! Things speed up again, DOUBLE LARIATS take both men down!! “This is Awesome!” and still isn’t over yet! Escobar and Kushida slowly stir, Escobar is in a corner and Kushida runs in! Escobar blocks, puts Kushida up top and ENZIGURIS! Escobar climbs up again, fireman’s carries, fans anticipate what’s coming, and Kushida does, too! Kushida elbows free this time! Kushida has Escobar with a double wristlock, SUPER ARM-DRAG!! HOVERBOARD LOCK!!

Escobar endures, reaches, but Kushida drags him away from the ropes!! Kushida cranks as hard as he can but Escobar keeps fighting! ROPEBREAK! Kushida has the arm still, Escobar rams into buckles, and again! Kushida throws knees in return, and HAMMERLOCK SUPLEXES Escobar into buckles! Kushida drags Escobar back up, for another HAMMERLOCK SUPLEX! Bridging cover, Kushida wins!!!

Winner: KUSHIDA, by pinfall (still NXT Cruiserweight Champion)

The Time Splitter outmaneuvers Escobar and holds onto the title! Will this send the Emperor of Lucha to the back of the line? Who is next for Kushida’s growing reign?


My Thoughts:

What an awesome night! Of course, just about every week of NXT is awesome, but this was especially awesome. I don’t usually note recap packages, but NXT used the small recap of last week’s NXT Women’s Tag Team Championship match to transition into hyping up tonight’s matches. That is something Raw and even SmackDown can learn to do with their recent use of opening recaps. And using this one to set up Kross VS Theory opening the show was pretty well done. Theory and Gargano had great character work here, the match itself was perhaps the most intense a squash match could be, and of course Kross wins.

Gargano being mad at Regal is of course a great running gag. Gargano gets mad he has a match next week, reactively attacks Reed and only makes things worse for himself, and I am sure I am going to again be surprised by how well a steel cage match can go. Maybe Gargano wins, maybe Reed wins, who knows. The Way having that quick superhero spot to remind us again that Candice & Indi won the tag titles was fun, but I was hoping for a bit more, like a minute or so showing us how dysfunctional and chaotic it was to get things right for that little bit we got to see. Or at least a reaction from Shotzi and Ember. Maybe we get another The Way superhero video and then a reaction next week.

The next couple of weeks are being built up pretty well, too. Storm VS Stark, the North American Championship Steel Cage match, maybe Wolfe VS Dain that we were supposed to get tonight, just to name a few for next week, are all great matches. Then in two weeks, Franky Monet finally wrestles for NXT, and Kross VS Balor happens on TV! A big match in May before TakeOver: In Your House 2021 in June makes some sense, and will make for awesome television again. But I am thinking Kross finds a way to retain so that he can be the one who faces Kyle at TakeOver. Dunne’s open challenge answered by Ruff was great, Kyle VS Lorcan was great, Fish returning was awesome, and while I like them as reDRagon, it makes a lot of sense for Kyle and Fish to try things as singles stars for right now.

Grimes losing an auction to DeBiase was great, if only because it gives us a general idea of the (kayfabe) amount of money Grimes is making. He was willing to go to eight million but high double digits was too much. “Hit Row” is a good enough name for Swerve’s faction, their promos together were alright, it was the first time #TopDolla, Briana Brandy or even Ashante “Thee” Adonis (Tehuti Miles) have gotten real talking time, but it helped get their personalities and roles in the group across. Give it some time and I’m sure these four will be a top faction in NXT.

I’m a little surprised the women’s title didn’t main event, but I suppose it did give the match time to breathe. I think some booing had to be piped in to convince viewers that Raquel was the Heel, because I am sure the CWC fans love both Raquel and Mercedes. Raquel retaining makes sense, she just got going with this title, and she is definitely heading to TakeOver to face just about anyone NXT wants her to because there are so many good choices. MSK VS Breezango was a very good tag match, and they had the ref getting involved in a way that enhanced the match, and I think started getting some of the more reluctant CWC fans onboard.

MSK calling out Legado is a good move on their part, as was helping fight Legado off during the main event. Kushida VS Escobar is an awesome match, definitely worthy of the main event, but I figured there would be the usual case of WWE and televised wrestling making the second fall happen really quickly. But even then, NXT had a brilliant way of making that work because commentary sold the surprise of that armbar. Escobar took a smart, tactical approach of giving up his lead to save his arm, and then that arm still comes back to bite him because Kushida just kept after it and used that to win. Kushida retaining makes sense, Escobar can move on to whoever or whatever else, Kushida can give us fresh match ups, and surely Jordan Devlin will be putting his name back in the conversation soon enough.

My Score: 9.4/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (1/24/22)

Time to weigh in before the Rumble!

Published

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WWE Raw 2022

Raw prepares for the Royal Rumble!

Before fighting for the WWE World Championship, Bobby Lashley and BRRROCK LESNARRR step on the scales to make this one heavy Monday Night Raw!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bianca Belair VS Queen Zelina Vega; Belair wins.
  • WWE United States Championship: Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens; Kevin wins by disqualification, and Priest retains the title.
  • Six Woman Tag: Rhea Ripley, Dana Brooke & Liv Morgan VS Tamina, Carmella & Nikki A.S.H; Ripley, Brooke & Morgan win.
  • The Alpha Academy Academic Challenge Round 1, Spelling Bee: The Alpha Academy VS RKBRO; RKBRO wins and gets to choose next week’s challenge.
  • Randy Orton w/ Matt Riddle VS Chad Gable w/ Otis; Orton wins.
  • AJ Styles VS Austin Theory; Styles wins.
  • The Mysterios VS The Street Profits; The Mysterios win.

PLAY BY PLAY

Corey Graves is in the ring with Adam Pearce.

Pearce welcomes the fans to the official WWE World Championship weigh-in for the Royal Rumble. “Without further ado, please welcome the challenger, Bobby Lashley!” The Rocky Mountain Machine makes his way out, MVP right behind him, and some pyro added to his pose, and some more pyro in the ring. And of course, the WWE Champion, Br- “Ladies and gentlemen.” Paul Heyman walks out on stage to give his introduction, and says he’s so tired of everyone trying to steal his shtick, especially when no one does it as good as he does.

So about to walk down the aisle and step onto the scale, your REIGNING! DEFENDING! UNDISPUTED! WWE HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD~! BRRROCK! LESNARRR!! Lesnar makes his entrance, wearing a cowboy hat and jeans, and he goes to the ring to join Lashley. But given the attire and the smirk on his face, it’s hard to say he’s taking this serious. Graves points it out, and Lesnar asks if Graves would like Lesnar to get naked. How about just carrying on with this then? Graves says Lashley is the challenger, so he will go first. Lashley throws off his jacket, steps over, and stands on the scale.

The ref checks, and Lashley weighs in at 273 pounds. MVP says, “See that? 273 pounds of All Mighty killing machine! 273 pounds of specimen like no other. Closer to a god than a man. 273 pounds of bottled lightning that Brock Lesnar will have to contend with at the Royal Rumble.” The match so many had written off as impossible is happening. But Lashley knew it was inevitable. 273 pounds, and then after the Rumble, Lashley will gain some weight. The exact amount as that WWE Championship weighs. Lesnar and Heyman laugh that off, and Graves says it is Lesnar’s turn. Lesnar takes off his hat and lets Heyman hold that while he steps on the scale.

The ref checks, and Lesnar weighs in at 286 pounds. Lashley is upset, though. Lesnar thinks this is funny, huh? He’s acting like a fool because he knows Lashley will beat him for the title this Saturday. “Mark my words: this will be the shortest title run of your entire career. And that’s not a prediction. That’s a spoiler.” Lesnar laughs and says, “Well who’s the comedian now? Paul, get this. On Sunday morning, hot off the press, Bobby Lashley beats Brock Lesnar in the Hurt Lock. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new champion! The new reigning, defending, WWE Heavyweight Champion of the world~! Bobby Who?”

Lesnar laughs, takes his leave with Heyman, but it’s only a matter of time. Will Lashley have the last laugh when he’s the one leaving St. Louis with the title?

 

Bianca Belair VS Queen Zelina Vega!

The EST is dressed in gold, because she’s ready to go for gold in the Women’s Rumble! Will the Queen of the Ring merely be a stepping stone on Bianca repeating history?

Raw returns and Vega makes her entrance. The bell rings and they tie up. Bianca scoops and puts Vega on the apron. Bianca then blows a kiss, ducks the haymaker, drags Vega back into the ring and swings her around in the waistlock before a SLAM! Fans rally for the “EST! EST!” and Bianca avoids Vega stomping her foot! Bianca ripcords and whips but Vega reverses, only for Bianca to go up and over. Bianca handsprings, eggs Vega on, then dropkicks her down! Bianca kips up, drags Vega up, and suplexes! Bianca holds Vega up but Vega STUN-DOG MILLIONAIRES! Vega stomps away on Bianca in a corner and digs her boot in!

The ref counts, Vega lets off at 4 to then JUMP KICK! Vega keeps moving, and she KNEES Bianca down! Vega soaks up the heat, takes a bow, and then drags Bianca up. Bianca shoves Vega away, runs in but is sent into buckles! Vega then goes up, but Bianca ROCKS her first! Bianca scowls, trophy lifts Vega off the corner, but Vega fights free to a SLEEPER! Bianca RAMS Vega into buckles but Vega just throws elbows! Vega brings Bianca down to her knees, squeezes tight on the sleeper, but fans rally up. Bianca fights up, RAMS Vega into more buckles and then throws Vega off! Bianca scoops but Vega headscissors, but Bianca handsprings through!

Bianca rallies on Vega, dropkick and kip up! Fans fire up as Bianca brings Vega in for a suplex! Roll through, another suplex, and she even jogs in place before the SLAM! Bianca runs, handsprings, and MOONSAULTS onto knees! Vega grits her teeth, hops on, CODE- NO! No red, Bianca pops Vega off to a torture rack! KISS OF DEATH! Cover, Bianca wins!

Winner: Bianca Belair, by pinfall

Well, she just beat a queen, so this was the royalEST win Bianca’s gotten yet! Will she go back-to-back at the Rumble and return to WrESTleMania?

 

Backstage interview with Kevin Owens.

Kevin Patrick tries to talk with him before his US Championship match but Kevin Owens refuses to talk. K-Peezy points out KO was the first person to give Damian Priest a pinfall loss here on Raw, and KO agrees with that. But he faked an injury. What? What did K-Peezy say? Faking an injury? Is he accusing KO of lying? Has K-Peezy been in the ring? No, he hasn’t, so his opinion is moot. KO says he fought through pain! Just reed his shirt! “Just Keep Fighting.” Now tonight, KO gets his US title match, and guess what he’ll do tonight? Read the third! Just Keep Fighting. That’s right! And he’ll do that until he is the new United States Champion.

WWE United States Championship: Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens!

The Archer of Infamy knows the Prizefighter is two-faced, but now he knows what to expect after being duped into a defeat. Will Priest keep the gold away from KO? Or will Damian make it hard for him to hold back?

Raw returns and Kevin makes his entrance. The introductions are made, the title is raised, and we see who goes into the Rumble with gold already around their waist!

Kevin kicks, Priest pushes him away and fires off in the corner! Kevin dodges to CHOP and CHOP and forearm in return! The ref counts, Kevin lets off but Priest turns things around to fire off fast hands! Priest CHOPS, whips corner to corner, but Kevin reverses. Kevin runs in but blocks the knee to throw the leg down. Priest ROCKS Kevin with an uppercut, then throws more forearms! Priest runs, but Kevin drops to come back and CLOBBER Priest with an elbow! SENTON! Cover, TWO! Kevin argues the count but he goes after Priest in the corner. Kevin stomps, the ref counts and Kevin backs off. Kevin then runs in, but into a choke grip!

Kevin slips out of the choke slam to CHOP and forearm, but he runs into a BOOT! Kevin bails out, Priest builds speed, and Priest goes up the ropes. Kevin gets away, Priest hops down and goes out after Kevin. Priest blocks the superkick and throws Kevin into barriers! Priest puts Kevin back in, but Kevin SUPERKICKS him off the apron! Kevin hurries to the apron, SWANTON onto the knees! Priest was ready this week! APRON CHOKE SLAM! Priest is fired up and so are the fans as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Priest fires off kick after kick then a ROLLING ELBOW! Kevin goes to a corner, Priest hits a back elbow! But Kevin fights off the suplex, only to get a BELL CLAP! And a HEADLOCK DRIVER! Cover, TWO! Priest drags Kevin up, puts him in a corner and hoists him up top. Priest ROCKS Kevin with a right, climbs up, but Kevin hits back! Kevin adjusts and headbutts away on Priest! Then TORNADO DDT! Priest is in a drop zone, Kevin goes up top! FROG SPLASH! Cover, TWO!! Priest survives and Kevin can’t believe it! Kevin argues with the ref but the ref defends it was two. Kevin waits on Priest to get up, SUPERKICK!

Kevin gets Priest back up, whips but Priest holds ropes. Priest BOOTS back, ducks and dodges, to FLAPJACK Kevin down! Then a HEEL KICK! Cover, TWO!! Kevin survives almost being beheaded but Priest keeps his cool. Kevin claims he’s got a bad arm, but Priest doesn’t trust that! Priest stomps away on Kevin at the ropes, but lets off as the ref counts 4. Kevin still says he has a bad arm but Priest KICKS him out to the apron. Priest rushes over, Kevin HOTSHOTS him! Kevin give sup faking and rolls Priest up, with tights, TWO!! STUN- NO! Priest powers out to LARIAT! Priest is fuming, is Damian coming?

Priest KICKS Kevin into a corner, stomps away, fires down hands, but the ref backs him up. Priest still comes back for more, the ref has to push him away again. Priest BOOTS Kevin, fires off more elbows, but the ref calls for the bell!

Winner: Kevin Owens, by disqualification (Priest retains the WWE US Championship)

Damian got the better off Priest, but he still has the belt. Kevin may have gotten the win, but will he think again before pushing Priest’s buttons?

 

Royal Rumble entrees speak.

Rhea Ripley says, “I have a score to settle with Nikki A.S.H. But the one thing that’s consuming my mind right now is the Royal Rumble. This Saturday, it’s every woman for herself, so I’m going to win at any cost. It’s gonna be an absolute nightmare for the 29 other women when I win the Royal Rumble and move on to WrestleMania.”

Dana Brooke says, “Call me crazy, but this year is gonna be my year! As reigning 24/7 Champion, I’m ready any time, at any place. And this Saturday, I’m gonna continue riding that wave, and winning the Royal Rumble.”

Liv Morgan says we’ve all seen her from being happy to be here to the girl that took the Raw Women’s Champion to her limit. We saw her nearly become champion. But at the Royal Rumble, there won’t be “nearly.” She’ll win to become the NEW Raw Women’s Champion.

 

Sonya Deville finds Damian Priest backstage.

He was outta control! When the ref says to do something, he should listen. Or else he’ll get fined, suspended, or worse. So get it under control! Will Priest find a way to contain the rage inside?

 

Six Woman Tag: Rhea Ripley, Dana Brooke & Liv Morgan VS Tamina, Carmella & Nikki A.S.H!

We just heard from one team about the Women’s Rumble, but can they back it all up with actions? Or will they almost have momentum after facing the Daughter of Superfly, the Most Beautiful Woman in the WWE, and the Almost SuperHero?

Raw returns as Dana makes her entrance, followed by Liv. Then Mella makes her entrance, followed by Tamina, and lastly, Nikki. The teams sort out, Mella gets her protective mask while Dana starts with Tamina. They tie up, Dana wrenches to a wristlock, Tamina shoves her away then runs her over! Tamina soaks up the heat, taunts Liv and Rhea, then stomps Dana. Tamina rains down forearms, wraps on a chinlock and she thrashes Dana before clamping on a neck wrench. Fans rally and Dana fights up, Dana throws elbows. Tamina CLUBS Dana, back suplexes, but Dana lands on her feet to tag Rhea! Rhea dropkicks Tamina, then swipes at Nikki!

Rhea DECKS Mella, wrenches Tamina and hits her with short arm clothesline after short arm clothesline! Then a ripcord HEADBUTT, and a sweep to the legs! Rhea runs to basement dropkick! Fans fire up with Rhea, she brings Tamina up but Tamina shoves her away. Rhea comes back to sobat, then she NORTHERN LIGHTS! Bridging cover, TWO! Mella gets in and FABULOUS KICKS Rhea! Liv ENZIGURIS Mella! Nikki kicks Liv for a TWIST ‘N’ SHOUT! Dana SHOTGUNS Nikki, Tamina CLOBBERS Dana! Mella tags in, she pie faces Rhea, and that just pisses Rhea off! Rhea trips Mella, ties up the legs, PRISM TRAP!! Mella taps, Rhea’s team wins!

Winner: Rhea Ripley, Dana Brooke & Liv Morgan, by submission

That mask didn’t protect the legs! Will it protect Mella from being thrown out? but then Nikki SUCKER PUNCHES Rhea! What kind of hero uses a cheap shot?! Will Rhea personally make sure the Rumble is a nightmare for her former friend?

 

The Alpha Academy Academic Challenge Round 1, Spelling Bee: The Alpha Academy VS RKBRO!

In order for Matt Riddle & Randy Orton to earn a rematch for the Raw Tag Team Championships, they have to show their mental strength is superior in a series of challengers! Otis looked a little worried about that last week, but will he and “Master” Chad Gable be able to outsmart the Stallion & Viper? Or will #4PointOtis no longer be top of the class?

Raw returns and Kevin Patrick presides over this challenge. He welcomes to Raw Tag Team Champions, the Alpha Academy. Gable says that was a fine introduction but a terrible explanation. So he’ll put it in a way that even the mindless morons of Ohio can understand. SHOOSH. Tonight is the first in a triad of events over the coming weeks. Fans chant, “You Suck!” and Otis gets upset. Gable says SHOOSH, and realizes vocabulary isn’t Ohio’s strong suit. Triad means three, so there will be three events. These events will prove Gable is a genius, just as his Master’s Degree and 4.0 GPA does. Don’t boo education! If anyone needs it, it’s Ohio.

Now, this will also prove his protégé, his prized pupil, Otis has both the brawn and brains the size of a tree trunk when he and Gable decimate RKBRO into mental submission. Gable is so proud of Otis. And lastly, Gable will use this platform to officially announce that the Alpha Academy are in the Men’s Royal Rumble! And you better believe one of them is winning, and then the Alpha Academy will headline WrestleMania! Thank you! Kevin Patrick then introduces the former tag team champions, RKBRO! Orton & Riddle head to the ring, and Kevin Patrick reminds us that this is a spelling bee. Tonight’s winners will then choose next week’s challenge stipulation.

The champions open, and first up is Otis. Gable says Otis has this, and Otis nervously steps to the mic. Otis’ word is… Emmental. Can Kevin use that in a sentence? A form of Swiss cheese. E-M-M-E-N-T-A-L! CORRECT! Gable is proud and Otis is sure they’ve already got this. First up for RKBRO, it’s Riddle. Fans fire up as The Bro goes to the mic. Riddle’s word is… Calibration. Cali-bro-tion? No, calibration. Can he use that in a sentence? Uh, ok. “A simple calibration is used to set up the system for individual implementation.” Please put that into letters for Riddle. No, Riddle, you have to spell it. Oh, okay, like when he calibrates his scale for measuring ounces and-

Riddle, just spell it then! Right, sorry. C-A-L-I-B-R-A-T-I-O-N. CORRECT! Tied at 1-1 and Riddle is fired up! Gable is now up, and his word is… Disillusion. Gable laughs that one off. He was hoping for a challenger. For the sake of sportsmanship, give him the definition! SHOOSH! He didn’t need it! This is Mr. 4.0, baby! It is the disbandment of a group or organization- No, Kevin said disillusion, not dissolution. D-I-S-S-O-L-U-T-I-O-N! NO, Gable! Wrong word! What?! That was dissolution but Kevin said disillusion. This is a joke! Kevin said the word wrong! Gable says he spelled a word right! But it wasn’t the word that was said.

Orton says maybe Gable can just a freakin’ seat! Orton is ready to get this over with. Then his word and the win is… Well, one of the most commonly misspelled words. Dumbbell. Riddle says Orton has this! And looking at Riddle, Orton has this. D-U-M-B-B-E-L-L. CORRECT! Gable is furious! Dumbbell for Orton? Riddle IS a dumbbell! Gable, shut your mouth! And Ohio, let’s go ahead and shut Gable’s mouth for him! They can go 1v1 right here, right now! Gable is furious, and Orton says Gable is clearly not that smart so maybe he’ll spell out how he’s gonna beat Gable: the three most destructive letters in sports entertainment, R K O!!

Randy Orton w/ Matt Riddle VS Chad Gable w/ Otis!

Raw returns and the match is on! Orton and Gable circle, fans rally behind “Randy! Randy!” and ties up with Gable. Orton headlocks, grinds Gable but Gable fights up. Gable pries the hold, has a top wristlock and he brings Orton down. Otis says that’s the power of leverage, and Gable wernches to a wristlock. But Orton powers out to drop toehold and facelock! Gable moves around, Orton gets away, and the two circle again. They tie up, Gable wrenches, wristlocks, but Orton fights up. Riddle and the fans rally up, Orton wrenches through and headlocks. Gable powers out, Orton runs him over! Riddle is fired up as Gable gets to a corner.

Orton and Gable reset, tie up again, and Gable wrenches to a hammerlock. Orton slips around to hammerlock back, then headlocks. Gable powers out, Orton runs him over, and things speed up. Gable arm-drags, and arm-drags again! Gable keeps on the arm and fans boo as he wrenches the shoulder. Orton fights up, fans keep rallying, and Orton whips Gable to a corner. Gable goes up and over but Orton fakes out the arm-drag! RK- NO! Gable pushes Orton away, and then bails out of the ring to regroup with Otis. Fans boo and a ring count starts. Otis says you can’t RKO someone with no neck! Gable gets in the ring, he circles with Orton and they tie up again.

Orton wrenches to a wristlock, but Gable rolls, bridges, spins and handsprings to spin through and headlock. Gable then spins to the toehold and has the ANKLE LOCK! But Orton slips away and bails out to regroup with Riddle. Gable says it was that close, but Orton keeps his cool. Orton takes his time returning, but Gable throat chops him! Gable CHOPS Orton to a corner, throws body shots and haymakers, but lets off as the ref counts. Gable fires off more forearms, strikes a pose, but then Orton kicks back! Orton fires off EuroUppers over and over, whips Gable to ropes, then CLOBBERS him with an elbow!

Gable bails out again, Orton stalks up behind him! Back suplex to the announce desk! Gable flops to the floor and Otis can only glare as Orton looms over Gable. Fans are all fired up as Orton puts Gable in the ring. Otis gets on the apron, Orton knock shim down! But Gable CHOP BLOCKS a leg! Gable runs, runs Orton over, then hurries up the corner! MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO!! Orton survives and Gable can’t believe it, while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Gable has a standing toehold. Orton endures, Riddle coaches him up, but Gable stomps Orton down! Gable has Orton in a corner, hooks a leg in the ropes, then gets the other for a DRAPING DRAGON SCREW! The ref keeps Gable back but Gable shoots in to get the left leg. Orton CLUBS Gable, whips him but the bad leg gives up! Gable whips Orton into a corner, but Orton comes back to LARIAT! Orton manages to rally, and he dodges to BACK DROP Gable away! Gable goes to a corner, Orton runs in to clothesline! Fans are thunderous for RKBRO as Orton reels Gable in. Gable switches, Orton bucks the waistlock and hits a BACK2BACKBREAKER!

Fans fire up as Otis coaches Gable and Riddle coaches Orton. Orton puts Gable through ropes, drags him out, time to spell “vintage!” DRAPING DDT! Orton slowly gets up as fans fire up behind him. Orton hears the voices and he waits on Gable. Riddle sees Otis getting on the apron and runs over that way. But Otis gets him for an EXPLODER! Orton is distracted, Gable backslides him! TWO, and Orton hits a POWERSLAM! Orton’s bad leg slows him down, but the fans still rally as hard as ever. Orton stands over Gable, then aims from the corner. Otis shouts to Gable, but Orton runs in, only for Gable to dodge the punt! ANKLE LOCK!!

Orton endures as Gable thrashes the bad leg! Fans rally, Riddle CLOBBERS Otis with his scooter! And then again! And again! Gable is distracted, Orton rolls to send Gable into buckles! RKO!!! Cover, Orton wins!!

Winner: Randy Orton, by pinfall

RKBRO gets extra credit on The Alpha Academy! A win in the spelling bee and a win in the ring, but Riddle gets a mic. Riddle congratulations Orton, and reminds us that they get to choose the second Academy Challenge. Riddle thinks it’s time to go old school to gym class! What better way to show some physical prowess than a good, ol’ fashioned… scooter race! Is that really part of gym class? And does Otis even stand a chance of finding a scooter that can hold him up? Will RKBRO make it a 2-0 sweep? Or can Gable find a way to make a comeback?

 

Alexa Bliss continues her therapy.

The doctor thinks they’re making progress. Oh? He asks her a personal question: When was the very first time that Alexa met Lily? Oh, well, Lily’s been around her whole life. Any time Alexa was looked down on or bullied, Lily was there to be her friend. Alexa was just six years old when she met Lily. These two teenage girls picked on Alexa cuz she wore glasses, and they shoved her off the monkey bars. Alexa got knocked out, and when she came to, Lily was there. Those cute button eyes and the braids and stitching. Is that too much? No, keep going. Okay.

That day, Alexa and Lily got ice cream and played on the monkey bars. Lily said those mean girls would never come back, too. Then they ate candy and gumdrops, and they did that game where you stuff marshmallows in your mouth and try to say, “Chubby bunny.” Well, Alexa has plenty more to say, will we get to the bottom of Lily’s hold over Alexa?

 

Vince McMahon talks with Austin Theory.

Vince knows Theory is doing really good lately, especially the selfies. Yeah, look at this one! No, not that one. Well, it did feel good destroying Finn Balor, just like Vince wanted. And in the Rumble, Theory will win and face the champion of his choosing at WrestleMania! That’s exciting. If it’s not too much to ask, maybe Theory could get a late number? Like 26 or 27?Why would Theory think Vince has any influence over that at all? Especially right now, when he should focus on his opponent, AJ Styles. Whoa, as in, former WWE Champion, US Champion, Intercontinental Champion, Tag Team Champion, Grand Slam Champion AJ Styles? Yep! That AJ Styles.

Theory says that’s fine. Sounds good, even! Okay, hang on. Don’t forget your phone. And bring back a really good selfie. Yes, sir! Will Theory be able to be more than Phenomenal here tonight? Or does he finally fall out of favor with Mr. McMahon?

AJ Styles VS Austin Theory!

The Phenomenal One himself just got finished with a bright and shining star with a big ego in Grayson Waller. Will Styles check off another future star in Vince’s newest pet project?

Raw returns and Theory makes his entrance. The bell rings, they tie up, and Theory powers Styles to a corner. The ref counts, Theory lets off to mock Styles’ pose, but Styles keeps cool. They tie up again, Styles powers Theory to a corner but Theory turns it around. The ref counts, Theory lets off, and then he double guns. Styles still stays cool, ties up with Theory and gets a headlock. Theory powers up but can’t power out as Styles holds tight. Theory powers out, Styles ducks the hurdle, rolls Theory up, TWO! Theory fireman’s carries, but Styles sunset flips! TWO, Styles wheelbarrows to a victory roll, TWO! Styles dropkicks Theory right outta the ring!

Fans fire up and Styles takes aim. Slingshot and FOREARM! Direct hit and Theory checks his chin. Styles puts Theory back in the ring, stalks Theory to ropes, brings Theory up and bumps him off buckles. Styles CHOPS, Theory staggers to another corner, but Styles brings him out. Theory kicks but Styles blocks. Theory ROCKS Styles with a forearm, but Styles KICKS Theory’s leg! Theory hobbles to the corner, but Styles storms over. Theory YANKS Styles into buckles! And then throws him down by his hair! Slingshot STOMP, deadlift suplex! Cover, ONE!! Theory is annoyed and he rains down rights before wrapping on a headlock.

Theory grinds Styles but fans rally up. Styles fights up, puts Theory in a corner, but Theory turns things around. Styles dodges to CHOP! And CHOP! Theory falls and crawls, but he throws body shots. Styles KICKS Theory in the side! Styles runs for a BIG knee drop! Cover, TWO! Styles gets Theory up, snap suplexes, covers, TWO! Theory grits his teeth but Styles drags him back up. Theory FLAPJACK HOTSHOTS him! Styles sputters while Theory seethes, and Theory stomps Styles down! Theory drags Styles up, throws forearms, then whips corner to corner. Styles hits buckles hard, and Theory gets in his face! “How’s that feel?!”

Theory throws fists down but the ref back shim off. Theory stands on Styles’ head, but lets off as the ref counts. Theory drags Styles up but Styles DECKS Theory with a forearm! Styles drags Theory up, but Theory suplexes for a GOURD BUSTER! Styles flounders in the corner, Theory hoists him up top. Theory throws forearms, climbs up to join Styles, but Styles throws body shots in return. Styles ROCKS Theory, Theory drops but then somersaults to SHOTGUN DROPKICK Styles to the floor! Fans boo but Theory grins as he looks down at Styles, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Theory has a headlock. Styles throws body shots, Theory knees low. Styles kicks back, then ENZIGURIS! Theory staggers, Styles runs in but Theory catches his crossbody for a BACKBREAKER! Then a SWINGING BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Theory grins as Styles survives, and he stalks Styles to ropes. Theory bumps Styles off buckles, then RAMS a shoulder into his back! And again, and again! Theory lets off as the ref counts, and Theory throws down more fists. Theory brings Styles up, but Styles JAWBREAKERS free! Styles ROCKS Theory with a right, then CHOPS him to ropes. Styles whips, Theory reverses and BACK DROPS! Cover, TWO!

Theory says HE is phenomenal but fans boo. Theory drags Styles up to snapmare and stomp him down! Theory mocks Styles’ pose again, but misses the elbow drop! Theory grits his teeth as he gets back up and runs in at the corner. Styles elbows Theory away, then QUEBRADA DDT! Both men are down but the fans fire up! Theory and Styles are on opposite ends, Styles runs in to LARIAT! Theory kicks back but Styles fires off the Phenomenal Blitz! Styles hits a clothesline in the corner, then suplexes Theory to a NECKBREAKER! Styles runs, SLIDING FOREARM! Cover, TWO! Theory is still in it but Styles keeps his cool.

Styles drags Theory up, fireman’s carries but Theory slips out. Styles ducks the haymaker but not the back elbow! Theory hits a BIG back suplex! Cover, TWO! Theory checks his chin again, drags Styles up and says he’s got this. JAWBREAKER! Styles runs in, but into a BOOT! Theory somersaults for a BLOCKBUSTER! Cover, TWO! Styles survives and Theory can’t believe it! Theory shakes his head, convincing himself he can do this. Theory gets Styles up to throw big forearms in the corner. Theory puts Styles up top, climbs up to join him, but Styles resists! Styles slips through and trips Theory up! Styles waistlocks, but Theory elbows out hard!

Theory reels Styles in, but Styles fights out of the powerbomb! Styles ducks and dodges to PELE! Both men are down again and fans are rallying! Styles reels Theory in, but Theory fireman’s carries! Styles fights free, rolls Theory, CALF CRUSHER!! Theory scrambles, ROPEBREAK! Styles lets go and both men slowly get up. Styles grabs at Theory but Theory holds the ropes. The ref calls the ropebreak, Theory throat chops! But Styles BOOTS back, goes to the outside, but Theory trips up his springboard! High stack, but with ropes! The ref sees that and stops the count! Theory and the ref argue, but Styles ROCKS Theory!

Styles is on the apron, he springboards in, PHENOMENAL FOREARM!! Cover, Styles wins!

Winner: AJ Styles, by pinfall

Now that was phenomenal! Will Styles use this momentum to take the Royal Rumble and that golden ticket to WrestleMania? And what of Theory facing Vince’s wrath?

 

Raw holds a simultaneous interview with Becky Lynch and “Doudrop” Piper Niven.

Commentary wants to start with Piper. This match has been a long time coming, and Piper ran through the rest of the division to- Becky speaks up and asks if this is their first time. We start with the champion. And she’ll start with a champion of “a wee lass named Doudrop.” When she first got her start across the pond, who did she idolize? Becky. Who did she want to face most? Becky. Tell ’em how Becky paved the way, and as the groundbreaker she is, she gave Piper this match. People are asking, “Why would anybody in their right mind choose someone who can clearly out power them? Who can clearly break all their bones with one slam to the mat?”

Maybe that’s the answer! Maybe Becky isn’t in her right mind. Or maybe Becky is that confident in how damn good she is! Or that generous to grant an opportunity to a fellow Celt. Piper speaks up to suggest that maybe, Becky handpicked Piper because Becky is desperate. Maybe ever since she returned, she’s been ducking, dodging and scrambling just to hold onto the title. Maybe Becky thought putting the new girl in would be an easy victory. The only easy thing here will be how easy it is for Piper to break every single one of Becky’s ribs.

Becky wants “Doudou” to hold on there. Becky should be thanked for giving Piper her biggest match, her first title match here, and for paving the way and giving Piper a match at one of the biggest events of the year. If Piper had just said thanks, but no. Piper waited for Becky to get in and offer a handshake, so of course Becky slapped her across the face. And being the bigger person, Becky offers to lead Piper to victory in the tag match. But then Piper splashed Becky, dropped her, left her lying. Becky admits, she didn’t see that coming. But Piper’s in for a rude awakening at the Rumble when she steps in the ring with the #VanGOAT and Becky wins to stay Raw Women’s Champion.

Oh, is Becky done? Piper zoned out when she started hearing that whining, nagging sound, or else she was gonna lose it. But Piper will show gratitude when Becky shows respect. But Becky won’t, she will keep whining. She’s not a goat, she’s a little lamb on the way to the slaughter. The Dome is the slaughterhouse, and the new champion will be Doudrop! Becky says Piper was just another name to fill out the roster before this. Piper needs to know her place. It’s dead space and- Oh, Piper’s getting off the mic? She gonna run? She can’t run from the truth, or from this fight. Becky’s been champ for nearly three years !But then Piper barges into Becky’s room!

Piper and Becky scrap and referees rush in to stop it! Piper says her place is with the title, standing over Becky! Will Piper be the one to make Becky DouDROP that title?

 

Backstage interview with Rey & Dominik Mysterio.

Sarah congratulates Rey on being the WWE 2K22 cover superstar. What does it mean to be among the ranks like Stone Cold, The Rock, John Cena and The Undertaker? Rey says this is so dope. You have no idea what an honor it is to represent. Most superstars spend their careers chasing achievements, from main eventing WrestleMania or entering the Hall of Fame. Being on the cover of a WWE video game is no different, especially when that game is FIRE! Although, the one thing prouder would be seeing Dom on the cover one day. Dom says now Rey’s talking. Dom used to play those games growing up, and he knows he has to create his own legacy to be in those games. That starts Saturday when he wins the Royal Rumble.

Well okay, but that’d mean he has to throw Rey out. That’s not happening, right? Well after last week, he might be first to go! Dom’s got jokes. He’s playin’ right? Dom grins and heads out, but Rey laughs it off. Will “every man for himself” be true even for the Mysterio Familia?

The Mysterios VS The Street Profits!

Rey & Dom won alongside Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins last week, but now they’ll go against each other for some last minute momentum! Who will be on fire going into the Royal Rumble match after tonight?

Raw returns as the Mysterios make their entrance. The teams sort out, Dawkins starts against Dom. They circle, tie up, and Dom headlocks. Dawkins powers out, things speed up, Dom RANAS! Dom throws hands, knuckle locks and CHOPS, then goes up to FLYING ARM-DRAG! Dawkins dodges, Dom keeps moving, Dawkins hits a big back elbow! Cover, TWO! Dawkins drags Dom up, whips him to ropes, but Dom wheelbarrow sand throws Dawkins out of the ring! Rey gets in, holds the way open., Dom DIVES! Direct hit onto Dawkins, and then Rey crossbodies Ford! Rey runs, but Ford throws him out onto Dom!

Dom manages to catch Rey, but Ford FLIES! Direct hit and down goes everyone! Ohio is fired up as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again and Dawkins grinds Dom down in a chinlock. Dom endures, fights up, throws body shots, but Dawkins DECKS Dom with a right! Cover, TWO! Dom is still in this but Dawkins wraps on another chinlock. Dom endures again, fights up, Rey coaches him through it, and Dom gets to his feet. Dom throws more body shots, but Dawkins knees low. Dom ends up in a corner, but he dodges the cyclone splash to kick and TORNADO DDT! Both  men are down and fans fire up! Dawkins and Dom crawl, hot tags to Ford and Rey! Rey dodges Ford to tilt-o-whirl and headscissor! Ford ends up in a corner, puts Rey on the outside, but Rey ROCKS him!

Rey goes up top, leaps, SEATED SENTON! Rey keeps moving, dodges again, but Ford FLAPJACKS Rey down! Ford somersaults, to a SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Rey gets to ropes, Ford whips him, but Rey kicks back. Rey slides under, Dom gets in, and he gives Rey a boost to RANA Ford on tropes! The Mysterios dial it up but Dawkins trips Dom and drags him out! Ford runs in but Rey drop toeholds him to ropes! 6 1 NO! Ford blocks that, gets Rey up in an Electric chair, but Rey victory rolls! The Mysterios win!!

Winners: Rey & Dominik Mysterio, by pinfall

The King of Lucha finds a way to snatch this one away from the Profits! But then Dom gets behind Rey and lifts him up, but Rey RANAS Dom out! Rey tells Dom he needs to try better than that, but then Ford TOSSES Rey! But then Dawkins tosses Ford! Dawkins says he got Ford there! But then the DIRTY DAWGS get in, and they both throw Dawkins out! Roode & Ziggler talk trash, but then the Mysterios and the Profits get in to go after them! It’s a huge scrap, but the Dawgs get tossed! And then the remaining four all square off in their own corners! Will any of these men make it to the end of the Rumble match this Saturday?

 

Backstage interview with Seth Rollins.

Kevin Patrick brings up how the Usos are barred from ringside during the Universal Championship match at the Royal Rumble, and Rollins says that sounds so good. Rollins likes K-Peezy and will give him a little “insider information.” This was never about The Usos, or anyone else but Roman VS Seth, Seth VS Roman. Now they go 1v1 at the Rumble for the title, and historically speaking, Rollins likes his odds. Rollins knows he can beat Roman because he’s already done it. Roman knows Rollins has his number. Roman wants people to think very highly of him, but Rollins is the one who can put Roman in his place.

So speaking of Roman, Rollins is going to pay SmackDown one more visit this Friday, because unlike Roman, Rollins delivers his messages in person. See you Friday, brother! Rollins laughs it up, but will he have the last laugh this Friday? And will this Saturday be the first time Roman gets the better of Rollins?

 

The Miz heads to the ring!

The Hollywood A-Lister promised it last week, and now it’s here! Maryse’s birthday celebration will be here on Raw, and the ring’s already filled with presents! Will all go smoothly for the It Couple this close to the Royal Rumble? We’ll see, after the break.

Raw returns and Miz welcomes us to the Maryse Birthday Extravaganza! It’s a celebration of his wife’s birthday, and then Saturday, we will celebrate The It Couple beating The Grit Couple! So without further ado, welcome the birthday girl, a woman more gorgeous, more sexier and more intelligent than anyone here, Maryse! Maryse makes her entrance, and there’s security at ringside. Miz says he speaks for everyone here when he says, “Open your first gift!” Maryse pulls the veil off a painted portrait of her and Miz as a prince and princess! Miz has done it! She feels even more special than the day she became a mother!

Or when he got her that pink Rolls Royce! Or when he got her that $500,000 ring. Well no expense spared. He got top of the line security to make sure there will be no intruders! They checked the ceiling so there wouldn’t be a Brood Bath! There will be no Edge or Beth here! Miz speaks for all of us when he says, “Open your second gift!” Miz hands it to Maryse, she pulls off the lid, and it’s… A custom hand purse! It says “No limit” on the side because there is no limit to their love. Wait, what’s this big one? Miz thought Maryse got him something. Uh, it’s her birthday. Why would she… Wait, then if he didn’t get that, and she didn’t get that… Then what’s in the box?

SECURITY! Get in here and open the box for Miz! The guard goes up to it, rips the paper away, and it’s all a trick! Miz put the brick that Maryse hit Beth with in a frame! This demonstrates that these two will always be one step ahead of Edge & Beth. Just watch this recap video as proof! Maryse asked Beth to call off the Mixed Tag, Beth refused, Miz tried to jump Edge but failed, but it still distracted Beth enough so Maryse could CLOBBER Beth! Fans boo but Miz & Mrs. just soak it up. Now it is time for everyone to get up out of their seats and sing Happy Birthday to Maryse. On three. One, two, DO NOT BOO! This is a birthday celebration! Stand up and sing!!

Now, one! Two! Three! HIT IT! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you~! Miz is so sour… But here comes EDGE! AND Beth! Edge has the music cut to tell Mike ‘n’ Maryse that they’ve been real clever. But being clever won’t matter on Saturday. All these security guards won’t matter on Saturday. Because Miz & Maryse stepped in it now! They’ve got a pissed off Rated R Superstar, and an extremely pissed off Glamazon on their hands. These two are gonna show everyone why that’s not a good thing. The Grit Couple storms to the ring, CLOBBER guard after guard, and Beth scoop SLAMS the next one! Edge TOSSES another, Beth sends one more into the steps!

The It Couple bail out of the ring, so Edge and Beth tear everything up! Beth SPEARS one guard, Edge SPEARS another! Miz & Maryse freak out over the cake being in harm’s way, but the Grit Couple give a guard a HART ATTACK! Shout out to the days of Beth teaming with Natty. Another guard gets in, he gets a 3D!! A shout out to some of Edge’s greatest rivals, before he BOOTS another guard! Edge sees the cake still standing, and Miz says he better not! Edge drags the guard up, reels him in, and POWERBOMBS him through the cake AND table! The terror on the It Couple’s faces is real this time! Will they even show up in St. Louis for that Mixed Tag match?


My Thoughts:

I have a feeling word got back that last week’s Raw was pretty sad, because they made sure this week’s Raw was really good. Now, a weigh-in segment for a title that doesn’t really have weight restrictions was really just an excuse to get Lesnar and Lashley to interact one more time. But Lashley and Lesnar are both doing really well on the mic these days, and Lesnar being dismissive of Lashley is such a great element of this. It’d be wild if Lashley won this but there’s a good chance Lesnar retains and we still get something of Lesnar VS Roman, title for title. Rollins has a good promo rather late in the night, but him hyping up the SmackDown go-home means something good is coming.

Bianca VS Vega was a short match, as was the Six Woman Tag, but sadly that’s how things are in RawDown these days… But at least we got a great promo segment from Becky and Piper. Piper leaving her room to find Becky and brawl with her was awesome stuff, and their match is going to be awesome stuff, but pretty sure Becky wins. Then they’ll set up Becky VS Bianca at WrestleMania, Bianca finally avenges her SummerSlam loss. Also, Alexa Bliss has to be returning to action during the Rumble. She might not win but she could have a really good showing to reestablish herself. Tonight’s vignette didn’t really do much, it just had her rambling about Lily’s origin story with no serious revelation.

We got a really good US Championship match, but it was a bit cheap for Priest to get disqualified when “Damian” let loose. Maybe Kevin comes back after the Rumble to try again and that builds to a US title match at the Elimination Chamber PPV in February. Styles VS Theory was a great match, too, just wish Vince would’ve let Theory and Finn have a match as good as that. And if Styles was still feuding with Grayson Waller, we could’ve built to Styles & Finn VS Theory & Waller, but nope. Vince has apparently given up on Finn, but not enough to cut him the same way they cut a lot of other great people. What a weird old man.

I loved so much of the Academic Challenge segment. Great promos from everyone, and I love that Gable got so cocky that he went with what he thought he heard and not what Kevin Patrick really said. Then we got an awesome match of Orton VS Gable, that also had the awesome aside of Riddle attacking Otis with the scooter. Now, going with a scooter race next week isn’t really something you’d see in gym class from what I’ve experienced, but it’s definitely a Riddle kind of choice. I’m not sure how, but Alpha Academy is definitely finding a way to win to push this to the third challenge, which RKBRO will win to get a tag title match.

The Mysterios VS Profits was really good, with Ford and Rey really standing out in this match. Mysterios get the win for momentum, but then the Dirty Dawgs get in on things for a nice brawl. I don’t see any of those six winning, though, but maybe the Mysterios come out tag title contenders for after RKBRO and Alpha Academy sort out. And then we got a pretty good final segment. As birthday parties that get ruined goes, I like that Miz swerved us with the giant box and then we get Edge & Beth straight up crashing the party. I spotted the Tate Twins among the security guards that got bodied, I hope that means they’re signing with NXT 2.0. The Grit Couple standing tall here, the math would suggest The It Couple finds a way to win, but who knows, Edge & Beth could defy the math.

My Score: 8.3/10


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (1/24/22)

Washington DC gets Elevated!

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AEW Elevation Coverage

AEW has eight for America’s capital!

Team Taz’s Ricky Starks & “Powerhouse” Hobbs look to clear out Dante Martin’s allies, Matt Sydal & Lee Moriarty, as AEW continues in Washington, DC!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Leyla Hirsch VS Brittany Blake; Hirsch wins.
  • Private Party VS Myles Hawkins & Action Andretti; Private Party wins.
  • Brandi Rhodes VS Willow Nightingale; Brandi wins.
  • The Men of the Year VS Logan Easton Laroux & Mike Fowler; The Men of the Year win.
  • Red Velvet VS Janai Kai; Velvet wins.
  • Santana & Ortiz VS Breaux Keller & Goldy; Santana & Ortiz win.
  • Thunder Rosa & Ruby Soho VS Leva Bates & Jordan Blade; Rosa & Soho win.
  • Ricky Starks & “Powerhouse” Will Hobbs VS Matt Sydal & Lee Moriarty; Starks & Hobbs win.

QUICK NOTES

Great to see Leva Bates back in action, but I have a feeling she and Jordan Blade will put Rosa and Soho over. Leyla Hirsch is in her first match since her Heel turn, so seeing how #LEGITHEEL wrestles compared to when she was a Face will be one to watch. And Team Taz taking on Sydal & Moriarty is going to be great, especially since it ties story in from Dynamite.


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