Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (8/13/21)
Time to go on a Rampage!
It is a GOLDEN debut episode in Pittsburgh!
After knowing and waiting and preparing, AEW is ready for a RAMPAGE! THREE titles will be on the line, and one of them is from IMPACT WRESTLING!
- Impact World Championships: Kenny Omega VS Christian Cage; Christian wins and is the new Impact World Champion.
- AEW TNT Championship VS Contract: Miro VS Fuego Del Sol; Miro wins and retains the title.
- AEW Women’s World Championship: Britt Baker w/ Rebel VS Red Velvet; Baker wins and retains the title.
PLAY BY PLAY
The commentary team is pumped up!
Excalibur is with Mark Henry, Taz and Le Champion, Chris Jericho, and they’re ready to call all the action of this very first, very stacked AEW Rampage premiere!
Impact World Championship: Kenny Omega VS Christian Cage!
The Best Bout Machine becoming the Belt Collector has come back to haunt him! Captain Charisma is Omega’s challenger for the AEW World Championship at All Out, but can Christian #OutWorkOmega and take the unified Impact/TNA championships and make that match Champion VS Champion?
The introductions are made, the two title belts from Impact are raised, and we see if Christian can beat Omega at least this once!
Pittsburgh is already fired up for this historic opener for “A E DUB!” Rampage! Callis stays ringside rather than go to commentary as Omega and Christian slowly circle. They approach, talk some trash, Pitt is so rowdy it’s hard to tell what anyone is chanting, and Omega tries a little intimidation step. It doesn’t work on Christian, the two circle and tie up. They go around and Omega puts Christian in a corner but Christian turns it around. Christian lets off but he uses the “step” on Omega. Omega stays back, the two reset, and the fans are still fired up. Christian waistlocks, headlocks, but Omega pulls hair. Christian cranks the headlock and grinds Omega down.
The dueling become smore clear from the fans as Omega powers out, and as Christian runs Omega over! Omega sits up in a huff then stands, and Christian mocks the finger gun! Fans go nuts when he makes it a dirty bird! Christian circles with Omega again and they feel out the knuckle lock. Omega kicks low, CHOPS, then CLUBS Christian down. And then CLUBS him with double ax handles. Omega stands Christian up to CHOP! Omega whips, Christian reverses but Omega holds ropes. Omega drop steps to get around Christian and CHOP him again! The Electric Chair, but Christian turns it into double hooks! Omega bails out to avoid the Killswitch!
Christian stays in the ring and says it was that close. Callis coaches Omega, cools him down, then whispers some ideas. Omega seems to like those, but Christian slides out after him! There’s a cat ‘n’ mouse game, Omega CLUBS Christian down then stomps him down. Omega stomps Christian in a corner, over and over, then he lets off as the ref counts. Christian turns it around to CHOP! And CHOP! Omega turns it around to CHOP! And whip corner to corner, then go corner to corner for a LEAPING back elbow! Omega throws Christian out of the ring, runs to baseball slide but Christian slides in! Christian returns to WRECK Omega with a dropkick, right into railing!
Christian drags Omega up to CHOP! Christian puts Omega in the ring, climbs up the corner, but Callis distracts him! Omega SHOVES Christian off the top! Captain Charisma is down but not out as AEW Rampage goes picture in picture!
Omega talks trash to the corner post camera for some reason. Omega goes out to get Christian, drags him up and RAMS him into railing, and then brings him around to RAM him in again! Christian drags himself into the ring but Omega slowly follows. Omega looms over Christian and Christian grabs at Omega’s leg. Omega slaps the hands away, stomps Christian down, then scrapes his soles on Christian’s face! Omega pushes Christian and drops an elbow! Cover, TWO! Omega drags Christian up, Christian throws hands, but Omega CLUBS Christian down! Omega stands on Christian at the ropes, lets off as the ref counts, and mocks the applause of the fans.
Omega already celebrates like he’s won, and he grabs at Christian, only to be dragged down into a cradle! TWO, and Omega CLUBS Christian down! Omega and Callis both argue with the ref but the count was the count. Omega KICKS Christian in the back, stomps him down, KICKS him more, repeat. Omega drags Christian up slowly by his hair, sits Christian up, but Christian throws body shots and fast uppercuts! Omega ROCKS Christian, CHOPS him then reels him in for a suplex, only for Christian to snap suplex first! Fans fire up as Christian stands Omega up, but Omega digs his fingers into Christian’s face! The ref reprimands as Omega puts Christian in a corner.
The ref counts, Omega lets off at 4, to then go after the eyes again! Fans boo, Omega lets off, Jericho supports Omega doing the thumbing of eyes, and Omega puts Christian on the top rope. Omega CHOPS Christian, climbs up, but Christian throws hands. Omega hops down to ROCK Christian, then JAB! Omega climbs again but Christian throws body shots. Omega CLUBS Christian, Christian resists the superplex to CLUB away on Omega! Christian stands up to SUPER SUNSET FLIP POWERBOMB!! The fans are thunderous as both men are down. A standing count begins, and we spot Orange Cassidy and Kris Statlander in one part of the crowd, and then the Varsity Blonds in another.
Christian RAMS Omega into a corner, climbs up and rains down fists from all sides! Christian gets up to 20 before he lets off! The fans keep up that energy as he gets Omega on the ropes, and STANDS on his back! Then Christian slingshots and UPPERCUTS! Christian goes to a corner, hops up, FLYING UPPERCUT! Cover, TWO! Fans rally and duel as Christian stalks Omega. Callis tries to warn Omega, but Christian hooks arms! Omega gets an arm free and elbows back! Omega fireman’s carries, “YOU! CAN’T! ESCAPE!” ROLLING SENTON to MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Omega drags Christian up, fisherman and AOI SHOU- NO! Christian slips out to a REVERSE DDT! Cover, TWO!
Mark Henry can’t help but pull for Christian as he aims from a corner! Omega staggers up, Christian runs in, SPEAR meets V-TRIGGER! Omega counters and knocks Christian down! Omega drags Christian up to a POWERBOMB, flip through to V-TRIGGER! Cover, TWO!! Fans are shouting, “THIS IS AWESOME!” as Omega drags Christian up. Electric Chair, but Christian fights back! Omega pops Christian into a waistlock but Christian holds ropes to resist! Christian then elbows Omega way and leaps off the corner to sunset flip! Omega rolls through, but Christian drops back, V-Trigger hits buckles! Christian gets going to SPEAR Omega!! Cover, TWO!!
The Rated R Superstar won’t be happy with his best pal here as Christian can’t finish Omega off! Christian drags Omega as the fans are electric with not so much dueling as complimentary chants, “THIS IS AWESOME!” “FIGHT FOREVER!” Omega gets around to SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX!! Christian wobbles back up, Omega grits his teeth, and Omega reels Christian in for the nelson. SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX!! Omega “loads up,” aims and BANG! Omega runs but Christian bails out! Omega keeps running in but into a REVERSE HOTSHOT! Christian goes up, FROG SPLASH!! Cover, TWO?!?! Everyone is shocked and Callis is basically having a stress test!
Christian drags Omega up, fans love “A E DUB! A E DUB!” But Callis distracts the ref from seeing Omega LOW BLOW UPPERCUT Christian in his charisma! Omega calls to someone, and it’s two someone’s! The Young Bucks sneak out to ringside to slide Omega a chair! Omega sets the chair up, brings Christian over, Electric Chair and- No! Christian slips off to FULL METAL KILLSWITCH!! Cover off the chair shot, Christian WINS!!
Winner: Christian Cage, by pinfall (NEW Unified Impact Wrestling Champion)
Omega’s collection gets cut in half! Christian is now Captain IMPACT, the Double Belt Workhorse! Jurassic Express shows up to celebrate with Christian, and now everyone looks ahead to Chicago! If he beat Omega to open Rampage, can Christian beat Omega to main event All Out?
Mark Henry interviews Christian backstage.
Christian has to be excited to become the NEW Impact World Champion! JB and Luchasaurus help Christian celebrate with champagne, and Orange Cassidy is just kinda there in the corner. Henry says this is perhaps one of the biggest moments in Christian’s career, but he knows there’s still something more on September 5th. The AEW World Championship is the big moment. Henry wants to know, how does Christian feel? Christian says he’s feeling great, and this Lil’ Bit o’ the Bubbly is damn cold, but it is HOT in Pittsburgh tonight! Now, for one, Christian loves that Mark Henry is here, and also he said he was going to take Omega’s belts, starting with the Impact title(s).
But guess what?! Christian knows Omega is as advertised. Omega is one of the toughest and most talented guys Christian’s ever faced. So if this was hard, it’ll be nearly impossible to win that AEW title. “But I’m living in your head right now, aren’t I, Kenny?” Omega knows what can happen, and it’ll happen again at All Out! Will Christian go from two to THREE belts soon enough?
Fuego Del Sol speaks.
“This is the match of my life. This means everything, not only to me, but to my family! These people keep believing in me. They keep chanting my name. This is everything I’ve ever dreamt of and everything I’ve ever worked for.” Miro says AEW is playing games with his contender’s list, but Fuego says he belongs in AEW! God’s Favorite Champion is going to be baptized by fire!
AEW TNT Championship VS Contract: Miro VS Fuego Del Sol!
God’s Favorite Champion vows two things: make sure his hot, flexible wife is satisfied in every way; and to forgive his opponents after demolishing them. But Alabama’s Favorite Luchador isn’t going to let that stop him from finally becoming #AllElite! Can Fuego set Rampage on fire by becoming a champion before he’s an official AEW wrestler?
The introductions are made, and the second Miro turns around from the corner, Fuego hits a TILT-O-WHIRL TORNADO DDT!! The ref has him stay back, Miro flounders up and gets the belt off. The bell rings, Miro stands, into the FLYING TORNADO DDT!! Miro flounders out and Fuego can’t believe how close yet how far he is now! Fuego sees the belt and moves it aside while Miro is down! The ring count climbs, the fans are thunderous for Fuego, and Miro staggers at 9! Miro is in at 9.9, but into another TORNADO DDT!! Cover, TWO!?! Fuego is getting red hot though he’s wearing blue tonight! Fuego climbs a corner, Miro staggers up, FLYING-
Miro fireman’s carries Fuego for a BIG BULGARIAN DROP! Miro slaps clarity into his head, stomps about, and Fuego staggers up. Fuego turns around into the BEST KICK!! Miro snarls, gets mad, and shouts, “GAME! OVAAAA!” Then the DEEP GAME OVER CLUTCH! Fuego taps, Miro wins!!
Winner: Miro, by submission (still AEW TNT Champion)
Miro survived and in an instant, he retains his title! He has the contract meant for AEW, and RIPS it to shreds! Miro presents the title to his vengeful God, who will he be destined to destroy next?
AEW returns as Fuego picks himself up.
Fans cheer the valiant effort of the luchador, but wait! Sammy Guevara heads out to the ring! The Vlog Crew is represented, and then Tony Khan is here with Sammy! Tony hugs it out with Sammy, then hands him a clipboard…? Sammy has a mic to tell Fuego, “Fuego man, you lost. But sometimes there’s victory in defeat.” Sammy says Fuego has been coming to AEW over the last year, is something like 1-50, but who cares? The people love him! And Fuego, a lot of the guys in the back love you, too. Sammy gets a little choked up as he explains Tony felt it was only right for Sammy to be the one that comes out here.
Since they’re best friends, Sammy gets to say that official, Fuego Del Sol IS All Elite! He gets a contract anyway!! Dreams do come true! Fans are fired up for Fuego, is his career about to heat up?
Wait, who’s up in the rafters?
Schiavone isn’t here to say it, but IT’S STIIIIIING! AND DARBY ALLIN! Like AEW’s Batman & Robin, they’re watching over Rampage. Darby Allin has called out the supposed Best in the World for Rampage’s second episode, live from Chicago’s United Center! It’ll be Rampage: The First Dance!
Mark Henry holds a double video call interview with Britt Baker and Red Velvet.
The AEW Women’s World Championship main event is coming up, and he starts by asking the challenger, “You rained on Britt Baker’s parade. Why is that?” Velvet asks back, “Did everybody seem to forget that she attacked me with a crutch? Not only did I wanna ruin her night in Pittsburgh, in her hometown, but that was just a preview” of what Velvet will do to ruin Britt’s night tonight, again in her hometown. Velvet can’t wait to stir her ass up!
Henry then asks Britt about that moment, when Velvet showed up to ruin the moment that Britt had in front of the fans. Britt stops him there and says Velvet didn’t ruin anything. She didn’t rain on Britt’s parade, because it doesn’t rain in Brittsburgh, so long as Britt is champ. If Velvet thinks she’s stirring anything, she better stir that ish somewhere else, because this is BRITT’S night. Her main event, her people, her city. And when she competes with a “broken freakin’ wrist,” it’ll be #AndStill your champion, Dr. Britt Baker, DMD. Well enough talk, it’s TIME for the main event, after the break!
AEW Women’s World Championship: Britt Baker w/ Rebel VS Red Velvet!
The Dentist is in, and #Brittsburgh is more than ready to watch her in Rampage’s first ever main event! But will #TheChef cook up something that rots Britt’s sweet tooth and takes the title from her? Or will the Face of the AEW Women’s Division rearrange Velvet’s face to still be Pittsburgh’s hope?
The introductions are made, the title is raised, and we see if the black ‘n’ yellow still has some gold in it!
The fans are fired up for “A E DUB! A E DUB!” right at the bell as Velvet and Britt circle. They tie up, go around, and Velvet headlocks. Britt spins Velvet to a Fujiwara takedown! Velvet slips out, gets Britt’s arm, then steps over, but Britt powers out of the Final Slice! Fans cheer Britt but Velvet circles with her. They tie up, Velvet wrenches, wristlocks, Britt and Velvet circle and Velvet gets an arm again. Fans boo but Britt powers through to snapmare and cravat, only for Velvet to slip out again. Velvet has the arm to wrench, Britt wrenches back as fans chant, “Here we go, Brittsburgh, here we go!” Britt uses a double wristlock takedown to a cover, ONE!
Velvet gets up but Britt pie faces her! Velvet pie faces back! Britt scowls and fans boo but Velvet dodges a kick to roll Britt up! TWO, Velvet headlocks, shifts sides and wrenches to WRANGLE Britt down! Velvet doesn’t stomp Britt’s bad arm and lets her up? Britt gets up, Velvet wrenches her again and hammerlocks. Britt reaches back to drag Velvet back to a cover, TWO! Britt uses an arm to flip Velvet over, cover, TWO! Britt and Velvet reset, Britt knees Velvet low. Britt whips Velvet to a corner, runs in but misses! Velvet wraps the bad arm around the ropes but the ref counts. Velvet lets off, but she gets Britt’s arm again to wrench it! The ref has Velvet back off so she does.
Velvet pulls Britt along by her hair, Britt gets around to back elbow! Velvet wobbles, Britt knees her low. Britt whips, Velvet ducks and dodges but Britt redirects, only to run into a LEG LARIAT! Velvet stirs it up to the STANDING MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Velvet keeps focus but Britt hits low as AEW goes picture in picture.
Britt knees Velvet, whips her to ropes but Velvet blocks hip toss to arm-drag! But Britt uses that to wrangle Velvet into a grounded motorcycle stretch STOMP! Britt takes a moment to brag, “D! M! D!” Then she drags Velvet up. Britt shoves Velvet, Velvet turns things around to fire off hands! Velvet whips Britt but Britt wrangles her down again! Waistlock to bridge, TWO, but Britt holds onto Velvet. Britt shifts up to a chinlock with a half straitjacket, but Velvet endures. The fans use their Terrible Towels to rally behind Britt as she shoves Velvet to a cover. TWO, and Britt keeps on Velvet with a facelock. Britt gets Velvet up, BUTTERFLY SUPLEX!
Britt stalks Velvet to ropes, chokes her then has the motorcycle stretch for a STOMP into the ropes! The ref argues with Britt but this keeps them from seeing Rebel choking Velvet with her own Terrible Towel! Rebel gets away it it as Britt comes back over to knee Velvet down. Britt drags Velvet up, bumps her off buckles, then stomps away on her! The ref reprimands, Britt lets off to dig a boot into Velvet, then lets off again. But now the ref can’t see Rebel using her crutch to choke Velvet! Britt still talks with the ref, Rebel lets off, and Britt whips Velvet out then into the corner! Britt sneers as she swaggers about, but she walks into Velvet’s body shots!
AEW returns to single picture as Britt pushes Velvet into the corner and KNEES her low! Britt whips Velvet out then in again, only for Velvet to make it a straitjacket NECKBREAKER! Velvet pushes Britt into a corner, fires off boxing body shots then kicks a leg out. Britt ducks the Chef’s Kiss and comes back with a clothesline, but Velvet hits the arm! It’s the bad arm, so Velvet hits an ARM CODE BREAKER! Statlander is still in the front row as Velvet covers, TWO! Velvet keeps her cool, drags Britt up, and fans rally for “DMD!” Britt avoids the Final Slice again, kicks low, then FISHERMAN SCREWS! Britt runs in to La Magistrol to the ghost pin, TWO! Now the Rings of Saturn!
Fans fire up as Britt waves, but Velvet turns the hold to a cover, TWO! Velvet has the arm, pulls back and goes after the brace! The fans boo as Velvet gets the hand exposed! Rebel distracts, Velvet throws the glove at her! Britt gets up and rolls Velvet up, TWO!! Rebel has the title belt now, but the ref sees that! The ref EJECTS Rebel! Britt is furious, as are the fans, but Velvet SUPERKICKS! Britt is down, Velvet goes to the corner! Fans are calling BS but Velvet MOONSAULTS! Cover, TWO!! Britt survives and Brittsburgh comes alive. Velvet shakes her head, gets Britt up, but Britt suplexes to a LAST SHOT BRAINBUSTER! Cover, TWO!?!
Britt can’t believe Velvet survived but she gets Velvet up and runs to CURB STOMP!! Cover, TWO!?!? Velvet survives again and then gets Britt’s arm! Britt slips out, CLUBS Velvet, and CLUBS her again. The ref checks on the bad arm, and Velvet gets it! Velvet STEALS Rings of Saturn but can’t get the Lockjaw! Britt fights, shakes her head around, reaches around, but Velvet pushes off the ropes, only for Britt to turn it all around! Rings of Saturn, and though no glove, Britt reaches out, and Velvet grabs the bad hand to SMASH it over and over and over into the mat! And then hammer away on it! Britt gets her bad hand away and shifts around to make it a MIRRORED Rings!
Velvet resists but LOCKJAW! Velvet quits, Britt wins!!
Winner: Britt Baker, by submission (still AEW Women’s World Champion)
Who knew Britt could switch hit! Or, rather switch submit! The Doctor reigns in Pitt, but she gives Velvet another FISHERMAN SCREW! The ref reprimands but Britt puts the belt in the ring, sets Velvet up, only for Statlander to get in and DECK Britt! Wait someone gets in and DECKS Statlander?! Who- Is that Jamie Hayter?! She returns to AEW after about two years, and she looks so different! Britt said she was getting new back-up, and here’s Hayter! And she helps Britt set Velvet up for the BELT CURB STOMP!! Britt literally steps over Velvet, Hayter raises Britt’s hand, and the Rampage Era has truly begun!
An awesome debut for Rampage, with all the matches from top to bottom being amazing! And as advertised, there were no distractions, all action as this hour was mostly matches. Omega VS Christian was a great match, and even greater on the surprising result of Christian winning! This makes Christian a five-time world champion, and I suppose specifically a three-time Impact World Champion. This is great for what it means in the overall Omega story, in that this is the beginning of what I was hoping for. Omega has to run a gauntlet of sorts with high profile, high level matches. Omega lost here but I don’t think he’ll be losing at All Out, so Christian got his win here.
Miro of course won tonight, but it was great to see Fuego fire off so many DDT’s, and then still get a contract for the effort he’s been putting in. And then the main event, Britt VS Velvet with a HOT crowd for Britt made for a great first main event for Rampage. The action was great, Velvet got a great showing even in losing, but of course Britt retains since this was her crowd. It was a good detail that Kris got in to save Velvet while also staking her claim to the next title shot, but also how great to see a return from Hayter. Her being added to Britt’s group is a great way for Hayter to get screen time, and now we can have some tag team builds with Britt & Hayter VS Statlander & Velvet.
My Score: 9.2/10
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Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (3/17/23)
Will Hobbs is on a Rampage!
Will Rey Fenix rewrite the Book of Hobbs?
“Powerhouse” Hobbs is the AEW TNT Champion with help from QT Marshall, but can he keep it on his own against Rey Fenix?
- AEW TNT Championship: “Powerhouse” Will Hobbs w/ QT Marshall VS Rey Fenix w/ Alex Abrahantes; Hobbs wins and retains the title.
- Taya Valkyrie VS Ava Lawless; Taya wins.
- Matthew Menard & Angelo Parker VS The Bollywood Boyz; Menard & Parker win.
- Daniel Garcia w/ Chris Jericho VS Brody King w/ Julia Hart; Garcia wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
AEW TNT Championship: “Powerhouse” Will Hobbs w/ QTV VS Rey Fenix w/ Alex Abrahantes!
The Book of Hobbs says he had Aaron Solo steal the belt before QT helped him steal the title! But will karma come back to bite him? Or will Hobbs power through the Firebird?
The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and it’s time to for a Rampage!
Fans rally as Hobbs talks some smack on Fenix. Fenix and Hobbs step to each other and Fenix goes head to chest. But Hobbs shoves Fenix down! Fenix kips up, runs in, but gets run over! QT & Solo are amused while Hobbs eggs Fenix on. Hobbs then drags Fenix up with both hands, but Fenix breaks free to get around. Fenix waistlocks but Hobbs breaks free. Hobbs whips, Fenix handsprings over the sweep and fans fire up! Hobbs runs in, Fenix dodges again, and springboards, but he just bounces off Hobbs’ body! Fans boo but Hobbs runs, only for Fenix to dump him out! Fenix then DIVES! Direct hit but Hobbs stays up!
Fenix gets back in the ring, DIVES again, but Hobbs is still up! So Fenix aims, slingshots and QUEBRADAS! Down goes Hobbs! Hobbs gets up and hurries into the ring, but Fenix pursues. Fenix leaps, but into Hobbs’ arms! Hobbs pops Fenix up, and he POWERSLAMS Fenix down! Cover, TWO! Fenix is tougher than that but Solo & QT are still amused. Hobbs goes out after Fenix and he RAMS him into barriers! Hobbs talks trash on the fans but the fans boo back. Hobbs drags Fenix around, stomps him, then drags Fenix up again. Hobbs RAMS Fenix into more barriers! Fans rally for Fenix but Hobbs goes into the ring.
Hobbs kneels to soak up the heat, and he smirks while Alex checks on Fenix. Hobbs goes out after Fenix, CLUBS him, then throws Fenix into the ring. Hobbs says, “Who’s the champ!?” Solo says, “You the champ!” Hobbs hauls Fenix up, whips him hard into the corner, and Fenix bounces off buckles to hit the mat. Hobbs looms over Fenix, stands on him, and the ref reprimands and counts. Hobbs steps off, whips Fenix hard the other way, and Fenix again bounces off buckles. Fans chant “QT SUCKS!” but QT says to ignore that. Hobbs grins as he watches Fenix writhe. Hobbs looms over Fenix, and CHOPS him in the shoulder!
Hobbs then clamps a big claw into the shoulder! Fenix endures, kicks around, but Hobbs lets off to bring Fenix up. Hobbs suplexes, holds Fenix up, Harley Cameron gets a pic, and Hobbs SLAMS Fenix down! Cover, TWO! Hobbs clamps onto Fenix with the shoulder claw again as Rampage goes picture in picture.
Fenix endures, fights up, but Hobbs throws down elbows! Hobbs digs his hand into the shoulder again but Fenix still endures. Hobbs adds on a chinbar, then he CLUBS Fenix down. Fenix goes to the apron, and Hobbs stands on his head! The ref reprimands and counts, Hobbs steps off and Fenix flops to the floor. Hobbs argues with the ref, and QT sucker punches Fenix! Alex protests but the ref missed it all. Hobbs goes out after Fenix, high-fives Harley, and he storms up on Fenix to throw knees. Hobbs POSTS Fenix, and Fenix goes tumbling away! Rampage returns to single picture as Solo laughs at Fenix’s pain.
Hobbs grabs Fenix’s face and shouts at him that this is what he gets for answering the Open Challenge. The ref reprimands, Hobbs lets off and goes into the ring. Fenix drags himself up but Hobbs brings him into the ring. Fenix flops over and Hobbs toys with him. Fans boo but Hobbs taunts Fenix, “You wanna be champ?!” Fans rally for Fenix but Hobbs HIP DROPS him down! Hobbs clamps onto the shoulder again, but Fenix fights up. Fenix throws elbows and gets free! Hobbs grabs Fenix but Fenix PELES! And kips up to BOOT, mule kick, and SCREW HIGH KICK! Fenix knuckle locks, CHOPS, and goes up and up!
Fenix jumps around, but Hobbs trips him up! Hobbs YANKS Fenix off the ropes to POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO!! Fenix survives and QT is surprised, but Hobbs digs his forearms in for another cover. TWO, and Fenix crawls to a corner. Hobbs kicks Fenix, talks smack, and paces around to soak up the heat. Fans rally and Fenix CHOPS! Hobbs snarls, but he runs into a BOOT! Fenix then dodges to JUMP SOBAT! Fans fire up and Fenix feeds off that. But Hobbs stops the whips, swings, but Fenix waistlocks! Hobbs is too big to lift, and Hobbs elbows free. Hobbs snarls, whisp Fenix, but Fenix goes up and over! GERMAN SUPLEX!!
Fans are thunderous but QT is freaking out! Fenix covers, TWO!! Hobbs tosses Fenix away with that kick-out, but he staggers up. Into the SOMERSAULT CUTTER!! Cover, TWO!! Hobbs is still in this but Fenix crawls his way to a corner. Fans rally, Hobbs rises, and Fenix climbs up! TIGHTROPE PENALTY KICK! Hobbs wobbles and fans fire up more! Fenix shakes out the cobwebs, goes up the corner again, and leaps over Hobbs! Hobbs runs back in to POUNCE Fenix into a corner!! Then DEADLIFT SPINEBUSTER!! Cover, TWO!?!? Fenix survives and no one can believe it! Hobbs is furious, and he hauls Fenix up again.
Hobbs whips, Fenix tiger feints to HEEL KICK! But Hobbs DECKS Fenix! Fenix kips up to SUPERKICK!! Both men are down and fans are thunderous! Fenix drags Hobbs to a drop zone, he goes up the corner, and he FROG SPLASHES!! Cover, TWO!!! Hobbs is still in this but Fenix doesn’t lose focus. Fenix waits on Hobbs to sit up, and he SUPERKICKS! And then SUPERKICKS! Hobbs wobbles, runs in, but Fenix dodges to SUPERKICK again! Hobbs drops to a knee, Fenix runs in, SOMERSAULT- SPINEBUSTER!! Hobbs rolls Fenix through to get him in the torture rack! TOWN BUSINESS!! Cover, Hobbs wins!
Winner: “Powerhouse” Hobbs, by pinfall (still AEW TNT Champion)
Alex checks on Fenix, but Hobbs storms up to him. Hobbs brings down the straps, but he says it’s okay. QT turns Alex around for a DIAMOND CUTTER! Fans boo as QT raises Hobbs’ hand in victory. Will QTV help make the Book of Hobbs the story of the year?
Adam Cole speaks.
“March 29th will go down as the most important day in my entire life. Not only will March 29th be the debut of AEW All Access, but even more importantly to me, after nine months, I make my return to AEW. And I know that my opponent is going to give me the fight of my life. And that’s good, because I am looking for a fighter. I’m looking for a technician. I’m looking for someone to push me and remind me who the hell I am. So on March 29th, I show the world how damn good Adam Cole Baybay is, and nobody is gonna stop me.”
Stu Grayson speaks.
“Jon Moxley, up until our match tonight on Dynamite, everybody was asking me the same thing. ‘Stu, are you back? Are you back with AEW?’ And I just didn’t know what to answer. I just didn’t. Until now. Now that I am in the hospital because you and BCC gave a concussion to my brother, Evil Uno. So now I’m thinking, Mox, now I’m thinking, ‘Yeah, now I am back.’ You wanted Stu Grayson, you got him! Next week, I want you, Mox. I want you in a one on one match. And I swear to god, I will break you.” The BCC are #ForgedByCombat, but will the Maniac be ready for someone born and bred for combat?
Taya Valkyrie VS Ava Lawless!
La Wera Loca is now All Elite! She wants after #ThatBitch, Jade Cargill, but will her first match in AEW be ruined by “The Hellion?”
The bell rings, the two approach, and Taya gets around to waistlock and SLAM Ava down. Ava scrambles to a corner, Taya runs in to ELBOW her! And then LARIAT! Fans fire up with Taya as she sits Ava down. Taya goes corner to corner, slaps her thighs then her head, and comes back to METEORA! Taya says that’s why she’s La Wera Loca! Taya CHOPS Ava against the ropes, then CHOPS again! Taya whips, Ava reverses and dodges, but the SPEAR hits all the same! Taya drags Ava up, chicken wings, looks like Jaded but this is THE ROAD TO VALHALLA!! Cover, Taya wins!
Winner: Taya Valkyrie, by pinfall
Speaking of Jade, she, Leila Grey and Mark Sterling are on the stage. Sterling is taking notes, maybe drafting up a lawsuit. Will Jade have no choice but to take on one crazy Canadian?
Stokely Hathaway is in training.
Matt Hardy tells Stokely that he, Isiah Kassidy & Ethan Page are gonna get him ready for Hook. Hook’s a wrestling machine, a killing machine. He could break Stokely’s arms, legs, back, and neck. Hook could snuff out your life! Does Stokely want that? No! Then they’re gonna get him ready. Just trust them. The montage shows Stokely is off to a rough start, and a rough middle. And his technique to escape a half nelson is to tickle Isiah. But he seems to take scoop slams well. Hardy thinks they need about four or five more, to really toughen Stokely up. Hook is also a suplex machine. Wait, why’re they doing scoops then!?
Stokely runs up the bleachers, and he gets a cookie for his reward! That’s a good-ass cookie. But will any of this help Stokely against the Cold-Hearted Handsome Devil?
Matthew Menard & Angelo Parker VS The Bollywood Boyz!
Don’t touch that dial and stay on ’em! It’s a battle of Canadians as the duo formerly known as 2Point0 take on some old frenemies from back in the day. Will Daddy Magic & Cool Hand Ange prove they’re still great sports… enner-tay-ners? Or will there be lights, camera and Bollywood action in Winnipeg?
The teams sort out and Parker starts against Harv Sihra. The two circle, feel things out, but Menard takes a swipe. Harv is distracted and that allows Parker to clobber him from behind! The JAS mug Harv, Gurv runs in but he gets beat down, too! Parker KNEES Gurv out of the ring, then Menard UPPERCUTS Harv. The JAS double whip Harv to ropes, but Harv holds ropes to stop himself. Menard runs in but into an UPPERCUT! Parker runs in but into a LARIAT! Harv UPPERCUTS again, tags Gurv, and the brothers set Parker up for a FLYING UPPERCUT SPINEBUSTER! Parker bails out and fans boo.
Parker is flustered but the fans rally for “BOLLYWOOD! BOLLYWOOD!” Gurv runs and slides out, but Parker slides in! Gurv grabs Parker’s legs, but Parker BOOTS Gurv away. Parker tags Menard before Gurv slides back in, and Parker dodges to set Gurv up for Menard’s LARIAT! Menard soaks up the cheers and jeers, then he drags Gurv. Menard bumps Gurv off buckles, CHOPS, but Gurv CHOPS back! Menard ROCKS Gurv, bumps him off buckles and tags in Parker. The JAS mugs Gurv and then Parker brings Gurv up. Parker snap suplexes, stomps, then mockingly applauds at Harv while Rampage goes picture in picture.
Parker “kicks dirt” at Gurv while staring down Harv. Parker drags Gurv up, tags Menard, and the JAS mug Gurv again. Menard throws Gurv out hard, then he taunts Harv. The ref reprimands Menard but Parker stomps away on Gurv! Menard then goes out to bring Gurv up and throw him into barriers! Menard soaks up the cheers and jeers before he puts Gurv back in. Menard drags Gurv back, tags in Parker, and they stomp away on Gurv. Then they split the wishbone! Gurv writhes, but Parker keeps him from Harv. Parker stands Gurv up, whips him to ropes, but Gurv kicks back! And LARIATS!
Both men down, the fans rally up, but Parker anchors Gurv with a toehold! Tag to Menard and he drops an elbow! Cover, ONE!! Gurv hangs tough but Menard covers again, TWO! Menard SLAPS Gurv around, CHOKES him in the ropes, but lets off as the ref counts. Menard mockingly kisses Gurv’s forehead before he tags Parker. The JAS mugs Gurv more, drag him up, but Gurv shoulders into Parker! Slingshot sunset flip! TWO! LAIRAT from Gurv! Both men are down again and fans rally up again! Parker tags Menard, the JAS drags Gurv up, and double suplexes! The JAS is in control as Rampage goes to break.
Rampage returns as Gurv turns things around on the JAS! Hot tag to Harv! Harv rallies on the JAS, big elbows and clotheslines all around! RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP for Menard, then an atomic drop for Parker! WHEEL KICK takes down Parker! The JAS end up in opposite corners, Harv CHOPS Parker then whips him. Parker reverses, Menard drop toeholds, and they bring back the BOOYAH ELBOW! Gurv returns, but he runs into TWO FOR THE SHOW! The double flapjack onto buckles wipes Gurv out! Menard tags Parker, they drag Harv up, DOUBLE IMPALER DDT!! Cover, the JAS wins!
Winners: Matthew Menard & Angelo Parker, by pinfall
Menard & Parker win the long-awaited sequel from their Cruiserweight days, and they SCISSOR FINGER to call out The Acclaimed! Will Max Caster, Anthony Bowens & Billy Gunn have something to say on Dynamite next Wednesday?
AEW shares footage from earlier this week.
Don Callis has a camera crew and a taiko drummer to greet Konosuke Takeshita. Konosuke asks what’s going on while he’s given a bouquet of flowers. Callis says, “Look at the pageantry!” Konosuke says that was pretty cool. Callis says this is what Konosuke gets in Winnipeg and everywhere else, when he’s associated with Don Calls. They shake, and then Callis brings Konosuke in for a hug. This is great, right? Welcome to Winnipeg! Fans applaud, and Konosuke is admittedly flattered. But will all this special treatment convince the Future of Wrestling to join Callis’ stable?
BREAKING NEWS for Dynamite!
It is a crossover dream match as Kenny Omega takes on AAA’s El Hijo del Vikingo! The current AAA Mega Champion is an incredible high-flyer and is certainly leading the way of a new generation in lucha libre. But will he make an impression when he takes on the Best Bout Machine?
Plus, on top of Moxley VS Grayson and the No Disqualification match of Hook VS Stokely, Skye Blue is coming after The Outcasts! She takes on Toni Storm 1v1, but will Saraya & Ruby Soho make sure the “entitled rookie” doesn’t make it out of Dynamite in one piece?
The Gunns speak.
Colten Gunn welcomes us to “crappy Winnipeg, but guess what? You get to see The Gunns check into our suite because we are the champs, of course.” Austin is all fired up, but then he tells Top Flight to carry their things. Oh, oops, sorry! They aren’t valets! This is the second best brother tag team in AEW. Colten says Austin’s right! Darius & Dante say okay, that’s funny. Fans of the Young Bucks, right? What? N-No, that’s not what they meant. Oh, then the Lucha Brothers? Uh, no, not them, either. So the Hardy Boyz? NO! The number one brother team is THEM! The Gunns! Oh, really? That’s funny.
Just like them leaving their bags here with Top Flight, but not the belts. Because that’s because they know if the Gunns ever took on Top Flight, Top Flight would “valet” those belts, too. Oh, yeah? Top Flight thinks they’d win? Then how about this? Next week on Dynamite, they put the AEW World Tag Team Championships on the line! Then you can try to “valet” them. Top B*TCHES! The Gunns head out, but uh, they still left their bags. Dante & Darius take those away, but will they soon take away the gold?
BREAKING NEWS for Rampage next week!
Rampage will be on a different night next week, so mark your calendars for March 25th, 10 PM Eastern!
Excalibur hypes up the main event.
“Three teams in the main event, intent on leaving Winnipeg the AEW World Trios Champions. It was an exciting, brutal match, but it was a match that saw the House of Black retain their titles. In the midst of the melee that occurred after the bell, a war continued to rage between the Jericho Appreciation Society and the House of Black. And as a result, our main event, Daniel Garcia goes one on one with Brody King.” Mark Henry adds it’s time for the main event! But will the Dragonslayer be able to bring down the House of Black’s tattooed titan?
Daniel Garcia w/ Chris Jericho VS Brody King w/ Julia Hart!
The bell rings and then Garcia bails out. Fans boo but Garcia and Jericho soak up the heat. They hug, and Jericho shows off his custom Winnipeg Jets jersey, but then Brody storms out after Garcia. Garcia hurries away, slides into the ring, and Brody gets in the ring. Garcia just bails right back out! Fans boo and Brody paces around, but Jericho applauds the strategy. Brody waits on Garcia, but then storms out after him again. Garcia keeps up the cat ‘n’ mouse game, slides back into the ring, and Brody slides in. Garcia dropkicks the legs out! Garcia fires off fast hands but Brody TOSSES Garcia into a corner! And then SPLASHES!
Brody whips corner to corner, runs in but Garcia dodges. Garcia fires off hands, but Brody DECKS him! Fans rally up, Brody drags Garcia up and CHOPS! Fans rally while Garcia bails out again. Jericho checks Garcia, that chop already made his chest red. Garcia hurries away, but then Julia is there! She stares Garcia down, but Garcia tries to put on the charm with a little dance. Brody storms up behind Garcia, turns him around and CHOPS him again! Garcia falls at Julia’s feet and she smiles. Brody drags Garcia up to RAM him into barriers! Fans rally up, Brody stands Garcia up and CHOPS him again!
Garcia staggers away, face wincing with pain, but Brody throws him into more barriers! Brody confiscates the chair from security, makes Garcia take a seat, and Winnipeg hoots and barks with Brody. Brody runs to CROSSBODY Garcia into the barriers! Fans lose their minds and the ref checks Garcia. Somehow, Garcia is still in this, and Brody drags him up to CHOP again! Garcia staggers away and Brody keeps after him, to RAM him into the steel steps! Fans rally, Brody runs back in, but Garcia drop toeholds Brody into the steps! Brody bounces off the steel and Garcia manages to put his dukes up, as Rampage goes picture in picture.
The ref checks Brody, and he’s somehow okay to continue. Garcia crawls into the ring to let the count handle this. Jericho coaches Garcia while Julia checks Brody. Brody shakes out the cobwebs, Garcia wants the count to go faster, but Brody is in before 10. Garcia stomps away on Brody at the ropes and he fires up now! Garcia drags Brody up, fires off forearms, then digs his knee in. The ref counts, Garcia lets off at 4, then stands on Brody to hyper stomp away! Garcia hops off as the ref counts again, and Garcia high-fives Jericho. Garcia goes back to Brody, but Brody CHOPS! And CHOPS! But Garcia BOOTS him down!
Garcia digs his boot in again, lets off as the ref counts, and Garcia does his dance. Garcia runs side to side to BOOT WASH Brody! Garcia says that’s it! He’s beat Brody! But Garcia still has to drag Brody out, only for Brody to kick at him from below! Garcia holds onto a foot until Brody BOOTS him in the face! Garcia staggers to ropes, Brody runs in, but into a drop toehold! Brody hits ropes, and Garcia CHOKES him! Garcia even claws Brody’s face! The ref reprimands, Garcia lets off, and he steps on Brody’s back. And then steps on him again! Brody just gets annoyed as Garcia keeps stepping on him.
Garcia does his dance, turns to step on Brody again, but Brody sits up! Garcia can’t push Brody down, so he KNEES away on his side! Brody just gets mad! Garcia throws haymakers, but those only give Brody power! Rampage returns to single picture, Garcia keeps throwing hands, but Brody roars! Garcia runs, into the BLACK HOLE SLAM! Cover, TWO!! Garcia survives but Brody drags him up! PILEDRIVER!! Cover, TWO?! Garcia survives and fans fire up, but Brody snarls. Brody puts Garcia in a corner, CHOPS, and Garcia seems ready to cry. Brody stands Garcia up to CHOP him again! Even Jericho felt that one.
Fans hoot and bark with Brody again, and he goes corner to corner to CANNONBALL! Brody drags Garcia to the cover, ROPEBREAK! Brody miscalculated and Garcia survives! Brody drags Garcia back to center, but Garcia fights the lift! Fans rally, Garcia CLUBS the legs and he drags Brody down. Garcia fires off knees on the calves and ankles! Then he clamps on a SLEEPER! Brody fights up, but he starts fading! Brody keeps fighting, he has Garcia as a backpack and he RAMS him into buckles! But Garcia holds on! Brody RAMS Garcia again, but Garcia still has the sleeper! So Brody THROWS Garcia off him!
Brody sputters as he goes back to the corner and fans rally behind him. Garcia stands, into the DISCUS LARIAT from Brody!! Brody says this is the end and Julia has an evil little smile. Brody drags Garcia up, crucifix rack, but Garcia fights free! Garcia dodges in the corner, rolls Brody up, TWO!! Brody escapes, but Garcia has the legs! Garcia manages to turn Brody for the WALLS OF JERICHO!! Jericho and Winnipeg cheer him on, but Brody endures! Brody fights around, crawls his way over, but Garcia sits deep! Brody still fights, and makes his way to the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Garcia lets off at 4.
The ref argues with Garcia, and Jericho CLOBBERS Brody with Floyd the Baseball Bat! Garcia then clamps on a RINGS OF SATURN!! Brody’s arm drops once! Then twice! Then three times! GARCIA WINS!!
Winner: Daniel Garcia, by submission
JAS should stand for “Jericho Always Steals (the victory!” Because that’s what Jericho just did for Garcia! The ref questions Jericho, but Jericho defends his innocence. Will the House of Black make sure the sports entertainers pay for these transgressions?
A really good Rampage here, even though we had to wait for basketball to finish up before it. Great opener out of the TNT Championship match, and naturally Hobbs retains in his first defense. And of course QT cheats to help Hobbs, even though he shouldn’t even need that. Hobbs’ story is still connected to Wardlow’s, so it won’t be until those two have a rematch that Hobbs loses this title. They’re gonna boost his win-loss record through the “House Rules” house show tour, it seems, as he’s defending this title against Christopher Daniels, despite Daniels needing to also be strong because of his ROH run.
Of course Taya wins her AEW in-ring debut, and of course Jade and Sterling show up to watch in person. I can already predict Sterling is going to draw up a frivolous lawsuit saying Taya can’t use her chicken wing facebuster, Road to Valhalla, because it is exactly the same move as Jade’s chicken wing facebuster, The Jaded. I bet Taya beats Leila in a tune-up that also counts as fighting the lawsuit, and so it’ll come down to who can hit the chicken wing facebuster first to win the TBS Championship. And after 54 wins over her two year career, Jade can lose to someone as well-known and established as Taya without being hurt, and Jade can finally move on to the women’s world title.
Good revisit of Ever-Rise VS Bollywood Boys, and I figured Menard & Parker would win to then also call out The Acclaimed. I bet Caster is working on his diss track for Menard & Parker right now to throw it at them the next time they meet. Decent segment with Callis and Konosuke, and of course Callis pours on the Japanese culture. Konosuke’s choice can still work either way, but fans really like Konosuke so I would think he stays a Face by rejecting the invitation to join up. And while such a story is beneath Omega, I wouldn’t mind if he had a small moment in this story since he was the one who brought Konosuke into AEW to begin with.
Speaking of Omega, great match coming up for him and El Hijo del Vikingo, that is gonna be awesome. Good promo from Gunns and Top Flight, especially with how Top Flight rightfully had three brother teams easily better than Austin & Colten. But Austin & Colten are totally going to cheat to beat Top Flight and retain the titles since their story is with FTR. Great promo from Grayson to call out Moxley, and it sounded very John Wick with that whole, “I’m thinking I’m back!” Moxley VS Grayson is going to be awesome, and will give Hangman a reason to come out and confront Moxley again since there’s still a lot going on there.
The one point of disappointment is that Mark Henry’s role is reduced even further. He didn’t get to welcome us back from break, and his line was trimmed down to just the latter half. But good vignette with narration from Excalibur to make up for it. And great main event, where I should’ve known Jericho would cheat to help Garcia win. Oddly enough, The House of Black will end up the Faces in this story since the JAS will be doing all the Heel tactics, and they could have quite the feud going towards Double or Nothing.
My Score: 8.6/10
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Mitchell’s AEW Dynamite Results & Report! (3/15/23)
The True North, strong and free!
AEW Dynamite is going big in Canada! The TBS title, World Trios titles, and the newly renamed International title, who wins in Winnipeg?
- Six Man Tag: Hangman Page, Evil Uno & Stu Grayson VS The Blackpool Combat Club; The BCC wins.
- AEW TBS Championship Canadian Open Challenge: Jade Cargill w/ Leila Grey VS Nicole Matthews; Jade wins and retains the title.
- AEW International Championship: Orange Cassidy w/ Danhausen VS Jeff Jarrett w/ Team Triple J; Cassidy wins and retains the title.
- AEW World Trios Championships Triple Threat: The House of Black VS The Elite VS The Jericho Appreciation Society; The House of Black wins and retains the titles.
PLAY BY PLAY
It’s time for MJF’s “Re-Bar Mitzvah!”
Justin Roberts begins by saying, “In the tradition of his forefathers, but better, please welcome the Bar Mitzvah Man, the AEW World Champion, MJF.” Fans boo as the Devil of AEW’s music hits and four young ladies accompany him out to the ring. MJF has them each kiss him on the cheek, but then gets a big kiss on the lips from the fourth one. MJF then gets in the ring, the ladies are dismissed and the blue and white streamers fly. MJF gets the music and has them cut his music. Fans are torn, many boo but many also still cheer him on. MJF says, “Now I know you Canadians aren’t very bright. I mean, for crying out loud, you folks used to think Bret Hart was actually entertaining.”
All the fans boo that, but MJF says, “No offense but I think we all know Shawn was much better.” But allow him to remind us why we’re here. We’re here to celebrate the most important day in recorded human history: MJF’s birthday. And in his religion, which is the only religion that matters, Judaism–boo all you want but they’re the chosen people, it’s just a fact–but under the eyes of his Lord, when a boy turns into a man, he hits 13 and that is when he is Bar Mitzvah’d. Now, MJF already had a Bar Mitzvah, the theme was “Maximania” and he lost his “V-card,” “It was sick, dude.”
But here’s why they’re having a Re-Mitzvah. When MJF tapped out “your boy,” Bryan Danielson, to become the undisputed best pro-wrestler in the world, to go on to retain the most important title in all of pro-wrestling, The Triple B, MJF is no longer merely a man. Now, he is IRONMAN! And to celebrate, hit the music! The Hava Nagila! Fans clap along and a chair is brought out! They dance around, MJF sits, and the chair is lifted up! But wait! Here comes Jungle Boy! Fans fire up as Jack Perry makes his way out, and the dancing stops. JB sees MJF’s Shazam cake then gets in the ring.
Fans fire up for “Jungle Boy! Jungle Boy!” as he gets the mic. But then Sammy Guevara makes his way out! The Spanish God walks down the ramp while MJF puts on a fuzzy Burberry patterned bucket hat. Sammy looks at the cake, too, but MJF shouts, “Don’t you touch that!” Sammy soaks up the heat from Winnipeg before he gets in the ring. Sammy has his own mic, and he tells “Max, oh, Max.” But wait! DARBY ALLIN makes his way out! Fans fire up even more, we’ve got all four Young Pillars of AEW are in the ring at the same time! MJF gets pissed and shouts to cut the music! But Winnipeg is thunderous for “DARBY! DARBY!”
MJF tells them no no no no no! They are RUINING his Re-Mitzvah! What the hell do they want? They all say, “I want a title match!” Fans fire up for that! MJF laughs and says that was cute and all, but let’s get real. JB says, “Shut up, Max.” The last time they went 1v1 was Double or Nothing 2020, the very first Pandemic Era PPV, no fans in the crowd. JB and MJF went back and forth for almost 20 minutes in that Florida heat. Until eventually, MJF cheated, as always, and then won. Fans boo MJF but MJF just shrugs. After that, their lives went in very different directions. MJF was handed every opportunity in the book. As for JB, he wrestled on Dark.
MJF has never had a match on Dark, huh? The others have. MJF has never been on Elevation, or even on Rampage! He just gets to walk around and do whatever the hell he wants. And it’s crazy to JB because there is an entire locker room, men AND women, who bust their asses every week! And they maybe get to get sixty seconds on Dynamite, maybe. But they all have to sit back there and watch MJF take 20 minutes to do the same “hokey bullsh*t” he’s been doing the past four YEARS! Fans cheer that and JB says this entire place revolves around MJF. And the first step in changing that is taking that world title!
Fans chant “HOKEY BULLSH*T!” But MJF says, “You wanna know the truth? This company does revolve around me, because unlike you, you and you, and all those boys in the back, I’m actually a star!” But now Sammy tells MJF to shut up! “You shut the hell up before I turn this Re-Bar Mitzvah into a re-circumcision!” MJF is stunned hearing that. Sammy says MJF talks too much, and has done that his whole life, his whole career. He literally talked his way into the door here. He kissed ass, lied and cheated to get where he is. But you know what Sammy had to do to get here? He had to grind on the indies for 10 PLUS YEARS!
Sammy had to work at Whataburger, and at Subway, every odd job, you name it, he did it! Fans cheer that! Sammy says that even then, “You look at me, you SOB,” when Sammy finally did get here, he was told he was only supposed to be the Inner Circle’s jobber. He was only supposed to be the bump guy for Jericho. But he overcame every obstacle that “they” put on me and he became a champion, THREE TIMES OVER! See, Max, Sammy isn’t like you. He’s never had “the machine” pushing him, and he never needed it! He had himself. Sammy got Sammy here, and he’ll get Sammy to the world title.
So whether MJF likes it or not, or whether these “dumbass Canadians” like it or not, Sammy Guevara is gonna be a world champion. Because he’s the Best Ever, and MJF knows it! MJF says that was cute, Sammy copying his catchphrase and all. MJF appreciates the fact Sammy took all this time out of his busy schedule getting into brawls in the back with people to do this. But now Darby tells MJF to shut up! His turn! “Hold your applause until after I’m done, please.” Darby says in 2013, he was going to film school and he turned in this movie. His teacher told him he was gonna have to change everything in it. The school does not accept this kind of movie.
Darby looked at her and said, “I’d rather just drop out of school then change a single thing.” So that day, he DID drop out of school. That was a blessing in disguise because it gave him the balls to do something he never thought was possible, and that was become a pro-wrestler. Fans cheer that, and Darby says it was his first day at the Buddy Wayne Academy and he remembers walking in and saying to himself, “You’re gonna make it as Darby Allin, or you’re gonna fail as Darby Allin, but you ain’t gonna change a single thing.” Fans cheer that, too.
Darby says fast forward all these years later, he’s in Tony Khan’s office, and he tells Tony, “Maybe I am the worst businessman in this whole entire place, because there will never be a bidding war for Darby Allin. Because AEW gives me something no amount of money can afford me, and that is the opportunity to just let me be me. The biggest problem, listen to this. The biggest problem I have with this whole entire company is you got grown ass wrestlers in the back going on Twitter, ‘I’m not happy! I’m upset! I wanna out of my contract if I don’t get what I want~!’ And that includes YOU, our world champion, with his own bidding war of 2024 crap!
“See Max, AEW means a whole lot more to me than it ever did you. That is exactly why I should be world champion. And you know what I’m gonna do if you don’t give me a championship match, right? You know what I’m gonna do. I’m just gonna go complain about it on Twitter. No, seriously, I’m gonna beat your face in with my skateboard, and I’m gonna give you a headlock takeover!” MJF is really mad now! He has had enough of all of this! Do they understand him! MJF takes off the sunglasses, and we see the black bags under his eyes and red spot in one! Darby says MJF looks like sh*t! Put the glasses back on.
MJF says fine, we’ve got “Jungle Jabroni, Dangerous Darb the Incel Skateboarding Mime, and Sammy ‘in about seven months, I’m gonna propose to a new girl’ Guevara!” Even JB thought that was a good one. Sammy tells MJF that’s funny, since uh, didn’t his fiancé leave him? Oh, so we’re making burns at MJF’s Re-Mitzvah? Y’all got MJF mashookenah up in this B! Okay! Hey, hey, Jungle had Christian. Sammy has Jericho. Darby has Sting. But y’know who MJF has? NOBODY! Because guess what? He didn’t need to be enrolled into AEW Daddy Daycare! MJF has been ready since day ONE!
And that is precisely why, as sick as it makes him now, these four ARE the Pillars of AEW! MJF is not afraid to admit that they are the past, present and future of pro-wrestling. However, MJF is the only pillar who can keep this place up, and that’s a fact. He has beaten every single one of them in singles competition, and they think they deserve a shot at the world title? No. They don’t even deserve to sniff the Triple B. So they are gonna leave since none of them were invited, and then MJF is gonna eat his cake, because he deserves it. “Thank you, screw you, bye.” He SLAPS JB! So JB CLOBBERS MJF! But Sammy KNEES JB!
Darby and Sammy fire off on each other! MJF stands up on the apron, but Darby and Sammy knock him off and onto the cake!! MJF, the cake and the table go falling over! That suit is ruined, and so is the party! Fans chant “You Deserve It!” but MJF is furious as he gets up and storms away. Will the other three pillars bring MJF down so that someone else can stand atop AEW?
Six Man Tag: Hangman Page, Evil Uno & Stu Grayson VS The Blackpool Combat Club!
The Cowboy was willing to let it all be over, but Jon Moxley, Claudio Castagnoli & Wheeler Yuta just had to beat down on John Silver & Alex Reynolds after the bell last week. Now, Hangman rides with the Dark Order OG, will they rip apart the Maniac, the Swiss Superman & The Decoder?
Dynamite is picture in picture as the BCC makes their entrance from the crowd. Claudio runs the ropes to warm up, and the ROH title belts are put aside. Dynamite returns to single picture as Hangman makes his entrance, followed by Uno & Stu. Fans fire up to see Stu back in action alongside his friends and in his home territory. The trios sort out, Uno starts and BOOTS Yuta down! Uno glares at Moxley, drags Yuta up and bumps him off buckles. Uno CHOPS Yuta but Yuta CHOPS back! Uno CHOPS again, but Yuta ROCKS t hen CHOPS! Uno fires off forearms in return and then CHOPS again!
Uno snap suplexes Yuta, but Yuta powers him to the BCC corner! Tag to Moxley and the BCC mugs Uno. Moxley fires off forearms, then brings Uno up to CHOKE him with his own vest! The fans boo, the ref counts, and Moxley lets off to snapmare. Tag to Claudio, Moxley shits Uno up for Claudio’s basement dropkick! Cover, ONE!! Claudio glares at Hangman while Yuta gets a cheap shot on Uno! The ref reprimands Yuta but Claudio UPPERCUTS Uno! Claudio then puts Uno up top, then he SUPER-MARES Uno right down! Cover, TWO! Tag to Yuta, he and Claudio mug Uno. Yuta storms up on Uno in the open corner to fire off hands and elbows!
The fans rally for Stu but Yuta snapmares Uno to drop a knee! Cover, TWO! Uno CHOPS, Yuta CHOPS then Yuta puts Uno in the corner. Tag to Moxley and Moxley puts one of Uno’s legs through the ropes. Moxley stomps away on the leg but the ref counts. Moxley lets off, then DROPKICKS the leg! Moxley drags Uno up, tags Yuta, and they mug Uno some more. Yuta CHOPS, Uno ROCKS, the forearms fly back and forth! Yuta runs to sucker punch Hangman! Fans boo but Uno back drops Yuta! Hot tags to Stu and Claudio! Fans fire up as Stu dodges Claudio to then triangle jump and APRON DDT Yuta!!
Claudio hurries over but Stu PELES him away! Stu then goes up the corner and METEORAS! Moxley runs in and fires off forearms! Fans boo, but Stu clinches Moxley for an URENAGE! Claudio BOOTS Stu, whips him, but Stu springboards to TORNADO DDT! Stu hurries and runs, LION-SENTON! Cover, TWO! Fans fire up and Stu feeds off that energy! Stu drags Claudio up, torture racks, but Claudio claws eyes! Claudio uppercuts but Stu hooks arms! Claudio fights the backslide, spins Stu around, pie faces him and Yuta holds ropes open! Stu falls out to the floor, Claudio goes out to CLOBBER him!
Claudio throws Stu into the apron, into barriers, then gets help from Moxley and Yuta, SPIKE PILEDRIVER to the floor!! Fans are losing their minds as Dynamite goes picture in picture!
Hangman scowls while Claudio looms over Stu. Claudio drags Stu up, puts him in the ring, then drops an elbow! Cover, TWO! Stu hangs tough but Claudio looms over him again. Claudio drags Stu up but Stu throws body shots! Stu goes to fireman’s carry but Claudio blocks to scoop and SLAM! Tag to Moxley and he swaggers around. Moxley stomps Stu, drags him up and SAIDOS! Stu flounders, Moxley covers, TWO! Moxley stays on Stu by going after the legs. Moxley ties the legs up, and has a TEXAS CLOVERLEAF! Stu endures as Moxley sits deep. Fans rally as Stu fights, but Moxley shifts to an STF!
Stu still fights forward, reaches out, and grabs the ROPEBREAK! Moxley keeps the legs hooked as he tags Claudio, and Claudio stomps Stu down. Claudio pushes Stu to a corner, UPPERCUTS, then bumps him off buckles. Tag to Yuta, the BCC stomp away on Stu, but let off as the ref counts. Yuta smirks as he brings Stu up and FISHERMAN SUPLEXES! Bridging cover, TWO! Not quite perfect, but Yuta has the leg for a HALF CRAB! Stu endures, Yuta sits deep, but Hangman and Uno coach Stu. Stu fights, but Yuta tags in Moxley. Moxley gest the other leg, to hand off the HALF CRAB!
Dynamite returns to single picture as Moxley now tags Claudio. Claudio stomps Stu down, then kicks at him tauntingly. Claudio mocks the Dark Order claw, then ROCKS Stu with a forearm. Stu JAWBREAKERS! Stu runs, but into an UPPERCUT! Cover, TWO! Stu is still in this but Claudio tags Moxley. The BCC mug Stu more, and Moxley reels Stu in. Moxley lifts Stu for a PILEDRIVER!! Cover, TWO!?! Stu survives and Moxley is frustrated. Moxley CHOPS Stu in the corner, CHOPS again, but the fans rally up. Stu CHOPS, Moxley fires off forearms! Moxley runs and clotheslines! Moxley keeps going, but Stu follows to JUMP KNEE!!
Both men fall and fans are thunderous! Moxley and Stu crawl, hot tags to Yuta and HANGMAN! Fans fire up as the Cowboy rallies on the BCC! BOOT for Yuta, triangle jump LARIAT for Claudio! Yuta runs in, Hangman dodges to scoop and FALL AWAY SLAM! Kip up and a PLANCHA for Claudio! Hangman hurries back in to run, Yuta blocks the lariat but the DISCUS SOUTHPAW hits! Fans are thunderous again and Hangman brings Yuta up. Yuta slips free of the bomb to CHOP and ROCK! Yuta runs, Hangman follows, Uno sneaks a tag! POP-UP POWERBOMB! Uno is up top, SWANTON BOMB!!
But Claudio UPPERCUTS Uno! Hangman ROLLING ELBOWS Claudio! Stu runs in to clothesline Claudio and himself out to the floor! Hangman drags Yuta up, Alabama Lifts, but Yuta slips free! Hot tag to Moxley! Fans are thunderous as we revisit Texas Death! The forearms start flying back and forth, but then Moxley KICKS! Moxley runs, into a LARIAT! Hangman goes to the apron, Moxley distracts the ref, Yuta CLOBBERS Hangman with the ring bell!! Fans boo but Yuta gets away with it! Uno and Stu check Hangman and the fans boo the ref. Uno and Stu go after Claudio and Moxley!
Fans fire up as the Dark Order has the advantage, until Yuta CHOP BLOCKS Uno! Claudio knees Stu, bumps him off buckles, and coordinates with Yuta. They double whip Stu corner to corner, then Yuta sends Claudio in. Stu POSTS Claudio! Stu dodges Yuta, runs and FLIES out onto Claudio!! Uno gets Moxley for a PARADIGM SHIFT!!! Stu goes up, Uno runs in, WOMBO COMBO!! Cover, TWO?!! Moxley survives but the Dark Order regroups. Tag to Stu, and Uno hooks Moxley up! Stu goes up, FATALITY!! Cover, but Yuta breaks it!! Fans are thunderous as everyone is down around the ring! Stu PELES Moxley!
Moxley staggers, Claudio tags in, “This is Awesome!” as Claudio whips Stu to POP-UP- RANA!! Stu has the cover, TWO!! Yuta trips Uno off the corner to deny the tag! Moxley clotheslines Stu, and feeds him to the POP-UP UPPERCUT!!! And then the REAR NAKED CHOKE!! Moxley has Stu trapped and he is OUT! The BCC wins!
Winners: The Blackpool Combat Club, by submission
Moxley holds on to shifts to the BULLY CHOKE!! Fans boo more but Uno gets back in! Uno fights but that’s 3v1! The BCC mugs Uno, then set him up for the UPPERCUT! But here comes Silver & Reynolds! The rest of the Numbers are here and the BCC leaves. The Maniac, the Swiss Superman and the Decoder got the better of the Cowboy and his posse, what will it take for Hangman to finish this with Moxley once and for all?
Sunday, June 25th, AEW and NJPW will converge again in Toronto, Ontario, Canada, for Forbidden Door 2! Tickets on sale March 24th, 10 AM Eastern, be ready to see all the stars of both worlds collide again!
Juice Robinson speaks.
“Everybody wants to know why I laid out Ricky Starks with the Left Hand, and then planted his head into the mat. Instead of, ‘Why, Juice, why? How could you do that to the beloved Ricky Starks?’ It should be, ‘What’re you gonna do about Juice Robinson walking down to the ring, knocking the taste outta your mouth and then planting your surgically repaired neck–Oh yeah, I remember–into the mat?'” Juice knows what Ricky’s gonna do: JACK DIDDLY SQUAT!! The Booster fired the first shot, but will the Absolute have the last laugh?
AEW TBS Championship Canadian Open Challenge: Jade Cargill w/ Leila Grey VS ???
Undefeated at 53-0, the champion feels she’s beaten everyone there is to beat in the United States of America. But now that AEW is in Canada, she wants the best the True North has to offer! Will #ThatBitch stay undefeated? Or will this be the night her streak ends?
So who stepped up? It’s Nicole Matthews, a four-time Elite Canadian Championship Wrestling (ECCW) Women’s Champion! She’s elite, but is she all elite? The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see if Canada’s best is good enough!
The bell rings and Jade dares Nicole to take a shot. Nicole isn’t taking that seriously, but then Jade pie faces her! Jade eggs Nicole on so Nicole fires off forearms! Nicole whips, Jade reverses and kicks low! Jade whips, then BOOTS Nicole down! “This is my competition!?” Jade chicken wings to hit Nicole with JADED!! Cover, Jade wins!
Winner: Jade Cargill, by pinfall (still AEW TBS Champion)
54-0 as easy as that, and now Renee Paquette steps into the ring to interview Jade. She’s still undefeated, she issued an Open Challenge to all of Canada, and she ran through Nicole Matthews. What level of competition is Jade looking for at this point? Isn’t Renee from Canada? Jade corners Renee but Renee says she’s just a reporter! Fans boo but Jade snatches the mic. “Is that it? Is that all you have to offer, Canada?” Fans boo but Jade smiles. Wait. Is that…? TAYA VALKYRIE!? Impact’s Wera Loca is now here in AEW! And Winnipeg fires up to see the Crazy Canadian make her way to the ring.
Taya steps to Jade, the two stare down and talk some trash, and fans are loving this! Leila wants to get in the way but Jade moves her aside. Jade holds up the belt, Taya nods, and Jade leaves. Leila sucker punches, but Taya ROCKS Leila! Taya chicken wings Leila to give her JADED!! Jade is pissed but Mark Sterling rushes out to stop her from going after Taya now. The collision is happening down the line, will Taya finally be the one to make Jade the former TBS Champion?
Backstage interview with Ricky Starks.
Tony Schiavone is with The Absolute to get his response to Juice’s comments and actions. “It’s real easy to attack a guy from behind, isn’t it, Juice? And I heard what you had to say. You’re jealous because I’m getting the so-called attention. Wow. Good. I deserve it. What the hell have you done here? You’re part of the Bullet Club. That was relevant back in 2015. But this is 2023, alright? Maybe you should stand on your own two feet and do something for yourself.” Starks says, “You’d think I would learn by now, dealing with these groups and getting myself entangled in all this mess. But same ol’ Ricky, different day.”
So if Juice has an issue with Starks, then come and bring it. It is an issue if Juice wants to drag Bullet Club into, then go and bring it. Any time, any place. Will the Booster face the wrath of Ricky Starks soon enough?
AEW presents: QTV.
First, the disclaimer: “The views and opinions expressed in this program are those of the speakers and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of any entities they represent.” And of course, this is a TMZ parody… QT tells his team that they are to keep their journalistic integrity and only give the fans the pure facts. No biases or attempts to ruin people’s careers. So what do we have today? Harley Cameron says Wardlow’s had a rough week, right? Someone broke into his car, stole all of his belongings, and no one knows who did it! They all have a laugh, and now we have footage of that person breaking into the SUV!
This person used a crowbar to break the window, then they unlocked the door themselves and snatched the belt. Wait! It was AARON SOLO?! And now they’re all laughing at how they got away with that! QT says Wardlow really shouldn’t be surprised. Last year, MJF stole all of his momentum! OH~! And Solo says with that haircut, Wardlow would make a great Spike TV Champion! HAH! RUTHLESS! AGGRESSION! But in all seriousness, what is next for Wardlow? Whatever is next for Batista, just not as good! HAHAHA! Nothing’s next for Wardlow, because he also left his passport in the car!
What does Hobbs say? “Wardlow, welcome to WILL’S World, b*tch!!” The Book of Hobbs’ next chapter is full of jokes, but will he have the last laugh? But speaking of the TNT title…
BREAKING NEWS for Rampage!
As part of this year’s St. Patrick’s Day Slam event, Hobbs has issued an OPEN CHALLENGE! Who will step up to Hobbs to get dunked on? Rampage will begin immediately following NCAA Tournament coverage this Friday, no earlier than 11:30 PM Eastern, keep your eyes open!
AEW International Championship: Orange Cassidy VS Jeff Jarrett w/ Team Triple J!
Just as life brings changes and growth, so must this title change and grow! All-Atlantic wasn’t enough, this is now the AEW International Championship! But even with this new name, the same grudge has to be settled! Will Freshly Squeezed finally get past Double J and his cronies? Or will the Last Outlaw be the first new champion?
The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who levels up!
The bell rings and fans rally up for Cassidy. Jarrett and Cassidy circle, tie up, and Jarrett shoves Cassidy to ropes. Jarrett then hip tosses Cassidy down, and he struts! Fans boo but Jarrett just soaks it up. Cassidy shakes out the leg Jarrett smashed with the guitar last week, ties up with Jarrett again, and Jarrett arm-drags Cassidy away. Sonjay mocks the bad leg, and Jarrett struts again. Jarrett then lounges on the ropes while Cassidy shakes out the leg. Cassidy and Jarrett reset and circle again. ORANGE- NO, Jarrett avoids the sudden Orange Punch, then scoops. Cassidy slips off, shoves, but Jarrett holds ropes to stop himself.
Jarrett taunts Cassidy, but Cassidy puts his hands in his pockets! Jarrett panics, rushes in, but Cassidy dodges to SHOTGUN, only for Jarrett to catch the legs! Jarrett steps through but Cassidy boots him away. Things speed up, Cassidy hurdles, but the leg jabs! Jarrett scoops and SLAMS Cassidy, then he struts! Fans boo more but Jarrett mocks putting hands in pockets. Jarrett scoots up to Cassidy and “unleashes” the kicks! Fans “OH!” along as Jarrett kicks, and he laughs. Cassidy gets up to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP! Cassidy fires off haymakers, he backs Jarrett down but Jarrett pushes him away.
Cassidy runs in, Jarrett dodges then whips Cassidy corner to corner. Cassidy goes up and over, bumps Jarrett off buckles, then bumps him off more buckles! And then again and again and again! Fans count along, Cassidy gets TEN! Jarrett staggers away and distracts the ref, and Sonjay anchors Cassidy’s foot! Cassidy bops Sonjay in the face! But Jarrett BLASTS Cassidy off the apron! Sonjay says that’s what Cassidy gets, and Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Jarrett drags Cassidy up and brings him around the way, to whip over the timekeeper’s table! Cassidy crashes into barriers, and then Jarrett storms after him. They go behind the timekeeper’s area to brawl in front of the bleachers! Jarrett bumps Cassidy off railing, ROCKS him with haymakers, and then stalks him along the way. Jarrett JABS Cassidy, JABS again, and then smacks him off a trash can! Then he CHUCKS the trash can at Cassidy! Jarrett brings Cassidy around to the other side of the stands and SNAKE EYES him off more railing! Cassidy sits down as he clutches ribs, but Jarrett brings him along.
Jarrett brings Cassidy up the steps but Cassidy fights back with haymakers! Jarrett staggers back down and fans fire up as they high five Cassidy. Cassidy CLUBS Jarrett on the back! They keep moving through the crowd, Cassidy ROCKS and CHOPS Jarrett! Jarrett whips Cassidy at barriers! Cassidy tumbles into ringside and Jarrett storms after him. Jarrett rains down fists, Sonjay cheers him on, but the ref reprimands and says to get this in the ring. Jarrett still rains down fists, then he soaks up the heat. Jarrett tells Justin Roberts and the timekeeper to move. Jarrett grabs the mic, and while Sonjay distracts the ref, Jarrett CLOBBERS Cassidy with it!
Dynamite returns to single picture, fans boo, but Cassidy writhes. Jarrett gets in the ring, argues with the ref, and Satnam Singh deadlifts and TOSSES Cassidy back in the ring! Fans foo, but Jarrett stomps the bad leg! Jarrett KICKS the leg out, and he calls for the leglock! Jarrett gets the leg, steps through, but then shakes his head. Not THAT hold, this hold! THE SHARPSHOOTER!! Fans boo that Jarrett is mocking the Hitman while torturing Cassidy! But Cassidy fights up! Jarrett is shocked as Cassidy overpowers him, into the SHARPSHOOTER! The Freshly Squeezed Hitman makes Jarrett suffer now!
Jarrett endures, crawls, and Sonjay pushes the ropes closer to Jarrett for the ROPEBREAK! Fans boo but the ref suspects something. Sonjay plays innocent, and Jarrett stomps Cassidy’s leg. Jarrett whips, Cassidy reverses but Jarrett gets around to a SLEEPER! Cassidy flails, reaches out, and fans rally up, but Cassidy is fading! The ref checks, and the hand drops once! The hand drops twice! But then Cassidy gets a second wind! Cassidy stands up, and puts his hands in his pockets! Then he sits to JAWBREAKER! Jarrett staggers, and Cassidy puts on a SLEEPER!! Sonjay distracts, and Satnam HOTSHOTS Cassidy!
Fans boo as Jarrett gets the leg, for a SHIN BREAKER! And then the step through, for the FIGURE FOUR! Cassidy endures, fights the hold, but Jarrett holds on tight! Cassidy crawls, reaches out, but his shoulders are down! TWO as Cassidy sits up! Cassidy rests, the ref counts, TWO! Cassidy rests again, TWO! Cassidy fires up and he fires off fists on Jarrett! Jarrett lets go of the hold, the haymakers go back and forth! Cassidy ROCKS Jarrett, but Jarrett rebounds to ROCK him in return! Cassidy rebounds to ROCK Jarrett! Jarrett rebounds to ROCK Cassidy! Cassidy rebounds, but Jarrett kicks! Cassidy blocks, spins him, but Jarrett dodges the Orange Punch!
Jarrett shoves Cassidy into the ref! Down goes the ref and Sonjay gets Jarrett’s guitar! Jarrett grins as he could give an encore from last week. But here comes AUBREY EDWARDS! She will NOT stand for this, and she snatches the guitar away! Jarrett is furious but the fans love it! Cassidy rolls Jarrett, TWO!! Jarrett sweeps the bad leg! The ref reprimands but Jarrett has to hold back his temper! You don’t hit a ref and you don’t hit a lady, and Aubrey is both! But Cassidy has the guitar!! Fans fire up, but then Satnam snatches the guitar! Cassidy says okay, fine. So he tells Aubrey! Aubrey sees Satnam and Cassidy plays hurt!
Satnam and Sonjay defend their innocence, Jarrett does, too, but Aubrey EJECTS them!! Ref Bryce Young is back up so Aubrey escorts Sonjay and Satnam away. Cassidy runs in, tilt-o-whirl DDT! Kip up on ONE leg!! Fans are thunderous as the elbow pad comes off! Cassidy locks ‘n’ loads, Jarrett wants the ref to check something. JAY LETHAL slides in!! And he CLOBBERS Cassidy with the Golden Globe!! Lethal was the ace in the hole!! Jarrett covers, Bryce counts, TWO!?!? Cassidy survives and fans are thunderous! Lethal is furious, but he gets the guitar! The ref asks where Lethal came from, but Trent Beretta SPEARS Lethal!!
Trent ROCKS Lethal, they brawl away, and Jarrett hurries to run. Cassidy dodges, but the bad leg gives out! Jarrett hooks Cassidy up, but no Stroke! Cassidy shoves and ORANGE PUNCHES!!! Cover, Cassidy wins!!
Winner: Orange Cassidy, by pinfall (still AEW International Champion)
New name, same action, and same champion holding it up! Has this finally ended things between Best Friends and Triple J?
AEW hears from tonight’s main eventers.
Malakai Black says, “So this is what it feels like to be popular, to have people fighting over you. And all it took for the world to notice were these.” Chris Jericho says this is the biggest wrestling match in Winnipeg history! JAS VS The Elite VS The House of Black! Also, Jericho and Omega face to face for the first time in two years, “two Winnipeg natives beating the crap out of each other in the city that knows how to fight.” Malakai says, “There is a sickness in this company. We are here to cut it out. Start by wiping off the dirt, the blood, the sweat of people who do not deserve to hold these titles.” The Elite, however, are silent. Will their actions speak for them tonight?
The Acclaimed debut a new music video!
“The Acclaimed, doing everything they can do. Platinum, Anthony and Billy rolling with the fans, too. I just wanna hear the siren, I’ve been waiting all night. Put the double scissors up, it’s Acclaimed 4 Life. No, we never roll down. Once again, we uncrowned. Coming from the Dark days, coming from the underground. You know we self made, trying to find a little bit of heaven in this hellscape, suddenly it felt great. Acclaimed across America, the barrier, we cause hysteria, and give it back to the game. Up early, autographing name, taking pics cuz everybody loves The Acclaimed, hey!
“Critics saying we should get a different motto. But we never slipping, no, we not Mitch McConnell. It’s like we hit the lotto, I know, we moving you. We can’t stop, we got something to prove to you. Never enough, the good guys, the bad influence, the People’s Choice, they never have us losing. We ya voice, and you’re saying we should bring it back home. We three kings been stealing that gold for you.” The Acclaimed know they owe it to the fans, but will they be able to take the AEW World Tag Team Championships back from the Gunns?
The Outcasts are here!
The outsiders, the famous-before-AEW, former-WWE-ers, Saraya, Toni Storm & Ruby Soho, head to the ring, soaking up the heat and flipping off the fans. They get the mics, and Saraya tells Winnipeg to shut up! Ruby says, “Let me tell you all a story. Once upon a time, the grass was greener here at AEW. Until a couple of dogs, well, let’s be real here, a couple of b*tches, came along and pissed all over that grass.” Saraya, what do they do with b*tches that aren’t housebroken? Saraya says, “We show them that AEW is OUR house!” Saraya says the fans should kiss the ground they walk out, because without them, there wouldn’t be a division!
“You can boo all you want, but you are lucky we are here! I AM A MIRACLE! I don’t expect anything less from a bunch of neckbeard, stinky twats!” Fans boo more but Saraya says she’s too mad, Storm has to take it from here. Storm tells all the “fat people” to listen up. Storm became a champion here in AEW- Oh, sorry. When she became interim champion here, not a real champion, she wore it with a smile, and none of them appreciated her. But their current champion, Jamie Hayter, cheated to beat Storm, and the fans LOVED it!! And so Storm realized, “None of you people know what you want. None of you!”
So they’re here to give us what they NEED, and that is change in the AEW Women’s Division. They are the Outcasts, but they ain’t going anywhere! They’re having too much fun going from one entitled rookie to the next. It started with Skye Blue, then Willow Nightingale, and Riho, and Dr. Britt Baker, DMD. And of course, the favorite, the champion, Jamie Hayter. But speak her name and here she comes! Hayter, followed by Britt, rush the ring and take it to the Outcasts! And in matching denim! Britt takes off her belt and she aims at Ruby. But Storm snatches the belt to CHOKE her with it!
Saraya CLOBBERS Hayter, Soho and Storm mug Britt! DESTINATION UNKNOWN! Storm hits Hayter with STORM ZERO! But here comes RIHO! AND Skye, and Willow! Riho has a big stick, too! Riho, Skye and Willow run The Outcasts off! Fans fire up, will the Pillar & the Killer see they have allies after all?
Matthew Menard & Angelo Parker speak.
Daddy Magic says he and Cool Hand Ange saw that great new music video from The Acclaimed, “UN-BELIEVABLE!” Menard will say right now that the video made his nipples hard. The JAS loves rap music! Love it! Parker says it was entertaining! A Tony Award winning video! Great job! Congrats! But that’s where the praise ends. Last week, two times the Acclaimed were given an invitation, and they spit in the JAS’s face! But Parker says it is okay, that’s just The Acclaimed playing hard to get.
Maybe they need a reminder of why they should put some respect on the JAS. So do them a favor, Acclaimed and Ass Man, tune into Rampage and see why the JAS is the epitome of sports… enner-tay-ners! This Friday on Rampage, Menard & Parker take on the Bollywood Boyz! Will Caster & Bowens be watching St. Patrick’s Day Slam?
Rey Fenix speaks.
He and Alex Abrahantes are here, and Alex knows that the Lucha Brothers came from nothing. Fenix sold candies, T-shirts, put up the ring and wrestled for free for a very long time, just to get where he is today. Alex reminds us that the Lucha Brothers have been AEW World Tag Team Champions, AEW World Trios Champions, but this Friday, Fenix looks to become AEW TNT Champion! “Will Hobbs, challenge accepted! ANIMO!” The Book of Hobbs has his next challenger, but will it be his last?
AEW World Trios Championships Triple Threat: The House of Black VS The Elite VS The Jericho Appreciation Society!
Malakai Black, Brody King & Buddy Matthews shocked many when they dethroned Kenny Omega & The Young Bucks at Revolution. And then Chris Jericho, Daniel Garcia & Sammy Guevara claimed they were the new #1 contenders before The Elite got a rematch. The House decided not to waste anyone’s time, and accepted BOTH challenges at once! Will the House still be standing after stacking the odds against themselves? Or will their reign be torn down after only ten days?
The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and no matter what, this historic night will have a historic finish!
Fans are already losing their minds and chanting “This is Awesome!” seeing all this star power. In this kind of Triple Threat, only two teams are legal at one time, so Sammy steps up to start against big bad Brody King. They circle, approach, and Sammy dodges to dropkick! Sammy kips up, soaks up the cheers and jeers, but Brody CHOPS him down! Sammy scrambles away to hug Garcia, then tags him in. Red Death steps up and CHOPS, but Brody doesn’t budge! Brody CHOPS Garcia down! Garcia hurries to his corner, but Sammy AND Jericho are gone! Garcia hurries all the way to the other side, but The Elite leave him alone, too!
Garcia looks around confused, Jericho returns and Garcia talks some smack to Brody. Brody BOOTS Garcia down! Jericho tags in and Winnipeg erupts! Jericho and Brody circle, but then Malakai tags in. Fans are going nuts as The Wizard and the Dark Father circle. But then Omega sneaks a tag off Malakai! Fans are even louder somehow as the Winnipeg boys stare down! But then the House BLASTS them both! And their teams! Fans boo but Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Brody TOSSES Sammy over barriers, Buddy does the same to Omega! Malakai KICKS Garcia, then he and Brody mug Jericho! The Elite fight off Buddy while Jericho is sent into railing! Malakai stomps and kicks Garcia and Sammy, Buddy dribbles Matt’s head off steel steps, but Omega goes after Buddy while Brody sends Garcia into barriers! Buddy ROCKS Omega, but he has to fight off the Bucks. Brody stands Sammy up to fire off hands while Malakai fires off on Jericho! Malakai then runs to BOOT Omega! Buddy keeps on Garcia, Brody storms around the way but glares at fans talking trash.
Malakai KICKS Omega, BOOTS Omega, then storms off to find someone else. Brody RAMS Omega into barriers! Buddy ROCKS Nick Jackson, then DUMPS him down. Brody tags in off Omega, stomps Jericho down, and Buddy KNEES Nick! Brody CHOPS Jericho to a corner, fires forearms, then CHOPS again! Malakai elbows Omega in the head! Brody CHOPS again! Malakai TOSSES Omega into barriers! Brody ROCKS Jericho, CHOPS him against ropes, but Jericho fights back! Malakai BOOTS Omega, Brody CHOPS Jericho! Jericho CHOPS Brody, CHOPS again, but Brody CHOPS Jericho down!
Brody roars and soaks up the heat from Winnipeg. Malakai drags Nick up, then KICKS him into barriers! Brody wrenches Jericho’s neck, digs an elbow in, then pulls back on the chinlock. Jericho endures, fights up as fans rally, but Brody throws body shots. Jericho fires forearms but so does Brody! They go back and forth, Dynamite returns to single picture, and Brody tags in Malakai. The House mugs Jericho, then Malakai wrenches an arm to a double wristlock. Jericho fires forearms and then CHOPS! And CHOPS! And CHOPS! Jericho whips Malakai into his corner, runs in, but Malakai avoids the Judas Effect! Jericho ducks the Black Mass!
Malakai swings but into a spin and underhooks, TIGER BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Jericho drags Malakai up, tags Sammy, and Sammy tags Garcia. Le Sex Gods double whip Malakai, double shoulder him down, and then they pose! Garcia poses with them and fans cheer. Garcia then kicks Malakai, brings him up, and facelocks. Malakai endures the grind, but Sammy tags in. The JAS mug Malakai, but Malakai drops to KNEEBAR Garcia! Sammy stomps Malakai! Sammy and Garcia double whip Malakai to the one open corner, but Malakai BOOTS Garcia away! Sammy runs in, he blocks a boot, but not the KNEE!
Malakai waistlocks Garcia but Sammy CLUBS Malakai! Malakai waistlocks Sammy but now Garcia CLUBS Malakai! PELE from Sammy! Malakai staggers away and Nick tags in! Nick knuckle locks and CHOPS Sammy, he hurdles Garcia and goes up, up and “LUCHA LIBRE~!” to ARM-DRAG HEADSCISSOR COMBO on Sammy and Garcia! Fans fire up with Nick but Malakai tags off Sammy. Nick runs in, Sammy puts him on the apron, and now Nick has to fight off the House! Nick ROCKS Brody, shoulders into Malakai and SUPERKICKS Buddy! Nick slingshots to FACEBUSTER Malakai and QUEBRADA-
NO, Buddy catches Nick! To LAWN DART into a KNEE from Malakai! Malakai stomps away on Nick, drags him back up and wrenches to tag in Buddy. Buddy goes up to DOUBLE STOMP Malakai’s arm as Nick pulls him in! Nick then leaps for his corner, only for Buddy to catch him again! Buddy RAMS Nick into the House’s corner! But Nick BOOTS back! Nick ROCKS Brody but Buddy waistlocks! Buddy keeps Nick away, but Nick ENZIGURIS! Hot tag to Omega! Fans fire up as Omega goes up the corner and CROSSBODIES Buddy! The JAS rush in, Omega CLOBBERS Garcia then he CLOBBERS Sammy!
Malakai runs in, Omega swings but misses! Malakai fires off strikes but Omega dodges to SNAP DRAGON! Brody runs in, Omega gets around, SNAP DRAGON! Buddy kicks Omega, whips, but Omega reverses to fireman’s carry! “YOU! CAN’T! ESCAPE!” ROLLING SENTON and MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Buddy hangs tough but Omega keeps his cool as the fans fire up. Omega full nelsons but Buddy fights it! Buddy elbows free, runs in, but Omega goes up and over and runs in to RANA! Buddy flounders, Jericho tags in! Fans are thunderous again as we finally get the Winnipeggers! Yes, that’s how you refer to them.
But Malakai runs in! Jericho DECKS him! But Buddy returns! Omega CLOBBERS him! Brody runs in, they both dodge and double clothesline Brody out! Fans fire up again as the two throw hands with each other! A true hockey fight right here, except for the ice! Jericho ROCKS Omega, runs, but into a V-TRIGGER! Garcia returns to BUSAIKU KNEE Omega! Brody LARIATS Garcia! Sammy FLYING CUTTERS Brody!! Malakai SPINNING KNEES Sammy! The Bucks SUPERKICK Malakai, and hit the ASSISTED SLICED BREAD to a SHINING WIZARD! Buddy’s up top, he METEORAS Matt, then whips Nick out!
Nick shoulders in but into Buddy’s underhooks! Buddy drags Nick out onto the ropes but Omega drags Buddy into a SNAP DRAGON!! Buddy is on the ropes, fans fire up as Omega takes aim! BANG and V- Jericho TACKLES Omega! WALLS OF JERICHO!! Fans are electric, but the DOUBLE SUPERKICKS take out Jericho! DOUBLE SUPERKICKS DOUBLE SUPERKICKS for Garcia! DOUBLE SUPERKICKS for Malakai! DOUBLE SUPERKICKS for Buddy! Sammy springboards in, into DOUBLE SUPERKICKS!! Brody returns, but into DOUBLE SUPERKICKS!! But he still DOUBLE LARIATS on the rebound!! ALL NINE MEN ARE DOWN and fans are electric!
Dynamite goes picture in picture as the ref tries to sort out who is what. Fans chant for “A E DUB!” as the teams regroup outside the ring. Julia Hart paces around as she watches Garcia and Sammy writhe. Omega and Jericho stay in the ring, crawl towards each other, and Jericho throws a forearm! Omega nods, and he gives it back! Jericho throws another forearm, so Omega gives it back! They go back and forth on their knees, faster and faster, and then stand up! Jericho gets the edge, but we’re back to the hockey fight! Jericho ROCKS Omega, Omega rebounds, and they DOUBLE LARIAT! Both men are down again and fans fire back up!
Omega and Jericho stir, and Omega crawls after Jericho. They sit up again, then stand, and Jericho CHOPS! Omega CHOPS in return! Jericho CHOPS again, so Omega CHOPS back! Dynamite returns to single picture as the CHOPS go back and forth! Both men roar, Jericho fires off forearms, and Omega falls to the apron! Jericho triangle jumps but Omega ducks and Jericho goes falling to the floor! Fans fire up and the Terminator Drums begin. Omega rises, builds speed, and he FLIES! Direct hit on Jericho and they hit the barrier! Fans are loving this as Omega drags Jericho back up and into the ring.
But the House mugs Omega! So Nick FLIES to take them out! Fans are thunderous as Nick goes up the corner, and Matt does the same! But Garcia and Sammy go after them! Fans boo but Sammy and Garcia climb up to join the Bucks. SUPERPLEX from Garcia to Nick! SUPER SPANISH FLY from Sammy to Matt! The JAS drag the Bucks out, Omega and Jericho rise but Brody gets involved! Brody goes up the corner?! But Omega CLUBS him first! Omega fires off elbows on the hamstrings but Brody hits back. Omega CHOPS Brody, climbs up after him, and fans fire up! Brody fires body shots, shoves Omega away, but Jericho goes after Brody!
Jericho climbs up, CLUBS Brody, but Brody throws more shots. Brody shoves Jericho down, but Omega V-TRIGGERS Brody!! Brody wobbles up top, and Omega climbs up after him! Jericho joins in, the Winnipeggers work together to DOUBLE SUPERPLEX Brody!! Fans lose their minds and Omega goes to a corner. Jericho staggers up, but he CODE BREAKERS!! Cover, TWO?!? Omega survives and Jericho is shocked! Wait, we get some picture in picture of The Dark Order and Hangman brawling with the BCC! How long have they been at it? But focusing on the ring, Jericho and Omega just resume brawling!
Omega ROCKS Jericho, runs, but into a throat chop! Jericho LIONSAULTS onto knees!! Omega hurries over to his corner, but so does Jericho! Hot tags to Matt and Garcia! NORTHERN LIGHTS! Matt is staring up his Polar Express in the True North! Again, and again, and then Sammy joins in, DOUBLE NORTHERN LIGHTS! Fans are thunderous and Matt is all fired up! Nick coordinates with Matt, and Matt drags Garcia up! Matt scoops, Nick springboards, but Jericho CODE BREAKERS Nick outta the sky!! Garcia slips free, clinches Matt, URENAGE! Sammy goes up top, Garcia shouts for him to finish it, SHOOTING STAR PRESS!! Garcia covers, but Brody breaks it!
Brody drags Matt over to the House’s corner, tags in off Matt, and then runs in to SPLASH Sammy! The fans hoot and bark with Brody and he roars! But Garcia jumps on for a SLEEPER! Brody RAMS Garcia into buckles! Then Brody runs corner to corner, and Malakai joins in, CANNONBALL BOOT WASH COMBO for Sammy!! Then the other way, Buddy adds on, CANNONBALL KNEE COMBO for Garcia!! And then a SENTON for Sammy! Brody drags Sammy up, and feeds him to Jericho?! Brody dares Jericho to tag in, so Jericho does. Jericho stands in front of the House of Black and he fights them all!
Fans are thunderous but this is 3v1! The Wizard gets mugged, and then fed to DANTE’S INFERNO!! Cover, but Omega breaks it!! Fans are thunderous as Omega rallies Jericho! Fans chant for “WINNIPEG!” as Brody storms up on Jericho. Sammy distracts, Jericho JAMS Brody with Floyd the Baseball Bat! Brody goes down and Sammy goes up, to SHOOTING STAR PRESS the Elite!! Jericho covers Brody, TWO!?!? Brody survives the homer to the head, but Jericho wants Brody to stand again! Only for Malakai to get in, BLACK MASS!!! Jericho falls out of the ring, Brody tags Buddy! Garcia runs in, into a pop-up KNEE! ROUNDHOUSE! DANTE’S INFERNO!! Cover, House of Black wins!!!
Winners: The House of Black, by pinfall (still AEW World Trios Champions)
Winnipeg is upset neither man of theirs won, but here comes Hager! Hager fights the House but he gets mugged! The rest of the JAS hurry to help Hager against the House, but then the brawl of BCC and Dark Order spills onto the stage! Hangman bowls Yuta down the ramp! Claudio and Moxley take out Silver and Reynolds, NEUTRALIZER and PARADIGM SHIFT! But Hangman is after Yuta all the way to ringside! There’s chaos all over the place! Hangman throws Yuta into the ring but Yuta bails out as Hangman slides in. The House and JAS keep brawling, too, but now Hangman dares the BCC to come get him.
Moxley storms into the ring, Claudio right behind him, but THE ELITE STAND WITH HANGMAN! Fans are thunderous but Hangman isn’t even aware of what’s going on! The BCC considers their options, and decide to back off since this is 4v3. Hangman asks what’s up, but then he turns around to see his old friends. Dynamite is going off the air, is The Cowboy going to rejoin The Elite?
An awesome Dynamite here, AEW really did go big for being in Canada, and after Revolution’s builds were a bit lacking, they are really ramping things up going into the Spring and Summer. I will groan real quick about Rampage having to worry about NCAA basketball getting in the way, but at least Rampage is looking great, too. Great new video from Caster of The Acclaimed giving love back to the fans, good response from Menard & Parker, and I like that we’re getting 2Point0 VS Bollywood Boyz to bring things back from WWE 205 Live. Menard & Parker will win, sure, but The Acclaimed definitely need to respond with a diss track.
Great stuff for AEW Women’s Division Civil War, with The Outcasts getting what was coming from essentially Team Homegrown. Hayter, Britt, Riho, Skye and Willow standing tall was good stuff, though I almost thought Riho was gonna hit Hayter with that pipe. But that wouldn’t be very in character for Riho, and she wouldn’t work as a Heel. Chances are, Marina and Nyla join the Outcasts, but I would really hope Shida gets back in this story. She was shocked by the Outcasts behaving this way at the start of things, she needs to tip the scales in one side’s favor for this to come full circle.
I’m a bit disappointed that Jade squashes someone in her TBS Championship match rather than facing a strong opponent. But maybe this is so Taya Valkyrie beats Jade before she gets to 55-0. That’d be big stuff for Taya to start her AEW run, and then Jade can finally move up to the top title. Good promos from Starks and Juice to hype up their coming match, but I hope him egging on the rest of Bullet Club doesn’t come back to bite him. While this is a feud to bide Starks’ time, we don’t need a copy and paste of Starks VS JAS where Starks has to get through like, Ace Austin and Chris Bey who are stateside, to finally get at Juice.
Great stuff out of the International Championship match but sometimes, AEW needs to remember that if they’re to be the better pro-wrestling company than WWE, they need to be better about pro-wrestling tropes. They ban Satnam & Sonjay from ringside last time, but forget to do it this time? I get that it was all to keep us watching them and then “surprise,” Lethal shows up to attack. But it’s not like any of that cheating helped Jarrett win, so I feel like they got things backwards. Jarrett should’ve tried all the cheating last week, and then Lethal takes Cassidy on in a clean match here that he still loses.
I should’ve known QTV was just going to be a TMZ ripoff. It was delivered well, poked fun at WWE because duh, that’s what AEW does anyway, and just as bad as actual TMZ. But of course someone under QT’s orders stole the belt, that was clear when Hobbs had the belt in his promo on Rampage. I do appreciate Aaron Solo is sticking with QT, and nice way to give Harley Cameron a role on TV. But obviously Wardlow will come after Hobbs after he deals with Fenix on Rampage. Wardlow and Hobbs will feud through to Double or Nothing, but it still feels like AEW’s booked itself into a corner with this feud, where both big men are fan favorites, but one push just hurts the other.
Great opening segment with MJF and his “Re-Bar Mitzvah.” MJF’s golden lightning bolts outfit looked awesome, I’m surprised Seth Rollins didn’t come up with something like that first. At the same time, I feel like none of those four ladies walking with him to the ring wanted to do that. But it was great to have the “Four Pillars of AEW” all together, each of them taking turns digging at MJF and MJF digging at them, and they even obeyed the wrestling rule of destroying the cake. I don’t think we’re getting a Fatal 4 Way at Double or Nothing, as epic as that would be. I think we should see MJF essentially run the gauntlet. He said he beat each of them in the past, he has to see if he can do it again.
Great stuff out of BCC VS Hangman & Dark Order, and I love that they blended it into the Trios Championship story and the Hangman VS Moxley story as a whole. Sucks for Stu to lose in his hometown, but the Heels were going to stand tall to put the pressure on Hangman. That Trios Triple Threat main event was chaotic in the good way, and it was just so awesome! As much as Winnipeg wanted a hometown hero win, the House of Black holding onto the belts makes sense as they’ve only just started. They can break off into a feud with just the JAS now that goes to Double or Nothing. And with The Elite backing up Hangman, fans still got to have an awesome closing moment, and I really like where this is going. If the women get Blood & Guts, why not have the men do a big 4v4 or something match for Double or Nothing to follow what is basically tradition now.
My Score: 9/10
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