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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (10/29/21)

SmackDown’s back on FS1!

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Coverage SmackDown 2021

What’s next for Friday nights?

Charlotte Flair is once again SmackDown Women’s Champion, but will that change very quickly with Sasha Banks coming after her?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Championship Contender’s Match: Charlotte Flair VS Shotzi Blackheart; Charlotte wins and denies Shotzi a title shot.
  • Open Challenge: Drew McIntyre VS Mustafa Ali; McIntyre wins.
  • Trick or Street Fight Tag: Shinsuke Nakamura & Rick Boogs VS “Happy” Corbin & “Mad Cap” Moss; Corbin & Moss win.
  • Naomi VS Shayna Baszler; Baszler wins.
  • The Usos VS The New Day; The New Day wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Charlotte Flair is here!

The Queen and once-again SmackDown Women’s Champion walks to the ring, gets an assist with the ropes, and gets a mic. “Well, well, well, well, well. As more things change, the more they stay the same. Charlotte Flair, the SmackDown Women’s Champion! How many times is that now? Six times? I’m not keeping count, because that’s what all of you do. Because none of you can do what I can do!” She is not only the face of the Women’s Division, she’s the face of this whole company, and the most decorated woman in sports entertainment history. No one, and she means NO ONE, can change that.

And here’s the thing. When anyone else in that locker room wins the title, there’s tears and celebrating. But when Charlotte wins, it’s just another Friday. So here’s the thing. After last week’s drama, order has finally been restored to SmackDown, and that is exactly what the division needs. They need a mentor to guide them and bring out the best in them. And that’s Charlotte. But here comes Sasha Banks! The Boss goes right to the ring and gets a mic to laugh at Charlotte saying she’s the leader. No one is buying that. Charlotte doesn’t care about helping the women in the back, only about holding them down. So let’s stop pretending. We know what Sasha wants, so when is the title match?

Whoa whoa whoa, Sasha. This is the NEW era of SmackDown! We all know Sasha thinks she deserves a title opportunity, but no no no, isn’t that selfish? How many chances has Charlotte given Sasha? And Charlotte always wins! Charlotte talked with Sonya Deville, and they think a new face deserves an opportunity. Oh, is this Charlotte being gracious? Or is she just scared? But here comes that new face! Shotzi Blackheart is here, and on her TCB Tank! “Charlotte, if you’re lookin’ for somebody that you’ve never faced before… Well then I’m your girl!” The Mohegan Sun fires up for that one!

Charlotte says okay. Shotzi did come to the ring in a tank so she must be ready for battle. That’s cute, right, Sasha? But y’know what? Shotzi gets her match, right now! And Shotzi fires the Nerf missile! Will the wild child hit the mark and get herself a title shot?

Championship Contender’s Match: Charlotte Flair VS Shotzi Blackheart!

SmackDown returns and Sasha is still hanging around ringside to watch this one. The bell rings and Shotzi circles with Charlotte. They tie up, Charlotte waistlocks and SLAMS Shotzi then pushes her around. Shotzi gets up, circles with Charlotte again and they tie up. Charlotte waistlocks again and SLAMS Shotzi to a cover, ONE! Charlotte says it was that close, but Sasha coaches Shotzi to stay on Charlotte. They go again, Charlotte kicks low and puts Shotzi in a corner. Shotzi BOOTS back, hops up and sunset flips, TWO! Shotzi runs, slides under the boot and howls to the moon! Charlotte is annoyed already, Shotzi comes back but Charlotte waistlocks.

Shotzi switches, Charlotte trips her up, things speed up and Charlotte handsprings. Charlotte ducks and dodges and fakes Shotzi out to basement dropkick! Charlotte stalks Shotzi to a corner, bumps her off buckles, then wrenches to back suplex but Shotzi lands on her feet. Shotzi kicks low, hits a JAWBREAKER, then springboards to RANA Charlotte away! And then adds a basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Sasha coaches Shotzi and Shotzi throws forearms in the corner over and over! Fans fire up with Shotzi and she whips Charlotte corner to corner. Charlotte reverses, Shotzi elbows back and then hops up again. But Charlotte YANKS Shotzi down and she hits buckles! Cover, TWO!

Sasha keeps coaching Shotzi but Charlotte CLUBS Shotzi down. Charlotte kicks Shotzi to ropes, chokes her on the ropes and mocks the count. She still lets off at 4 and Shotzi sputters. Charlotte brings Shotzi around to suplex but Shotzi makes it a small package, TWO! Charlotte CLOBBERS Shotzi and she clamps on with a neck wrench. Sasha is frustrated on Shotzi’s behalf, and Shotzi fights up. Charlotte kicks low, whips but Shotzi reverses. Charlotte tumbles up then out and BOOTS Shotzi away. Shotzi comes back to SCORPION KICK! Charlotte staggers into an ENZIGURI! Charlotte falls, Shotzi runs, WELCOME TO THE BALL PIT! Cover, TWO!

Shotzi grows frustrated but Sasha coaches her. Charlotte bails out as Shotzi climbs, but Shotzi hops down to build speed. Shotzi DIVES into a forearm! Charlotte and Sasha talk trash to each other, and Charlotte mocks the Boss’ dance. But Shotzi comes back and DIVES! Not the cleanest tope but she took Charlotte down! Sasha wants Shotzi to get back in this and Shotzi howls as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Shotzi is down on the outside as Charlotte climbs up the corner. Charlotte reaches the top but Shotzi gets in to hit her first! Shotzi climbs up to join Charlotte but Charlotte shoves her away. Charlotte adjusts but Shotzi’s right up to SUPER STEINER! Cover, TWO! Shotzi drags Charlotte up, Charlotte shoves but Shotzi dodges the boot to ROLLING ELBOW! Charlotte drops, Shotzi fires up, and she covers again, TWO! Sasha coaches Shotzi but Charlotte dodges the Ball Pit to BOOT Shotzi down to the floor! Charlotte PLANCHAS but misses, Shotzi SUPERKICKS her down! Sasha tells Shotzi to hurry and Shotzi gets Charlotte in! Cover, TWO!

Shotzi is frustrated, Charlotte drags Shotzi into a ghost pin, TWO! Shotzi kicks but Charlotte ducks the enziguri! Charlotte wants the Figure Four but Shotzi makes it a cradle! TWO!! Charlotte boots but misses, Shotzi gets a TIGER SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO!! Shotzi hurries to get Charlotte up and fans fire up. Charlotte elbows Shotzi away hard, Shotzi runs in but into a BACKBREAKER and BUCKLE SHOT! Charlotte then puts Shotzi in a drop zone, climbs up top, MOONSAULT but Shotzi moves, so Charlotte STANDING MOONSAULTS! Cover, TWO!! Figure four denied again, Sasha is there to get in Charlotte’s face!

Shotzi runs over, Charlotte moves and Shotzi hesitates! Charlotte ROCKS Shotzi then hits a NATURAL SELECTION! Cover, Charlotte wins!

Winner: Charlotte Flair, by pinfall

Sasha’s help cost Shotzi in the end, and now The Queen leaves without a challenger! Sasha checks on Shotzi and helps her up but Shotzi shoves Sasha down! “How dare you! This is YOUR fault!” Sasha and Shotzi argue, Charlotte tries to sneak back in but Sasha runs her off. Shotzi CLOBBERS Sasha and rains down furious fists! Shotzi puts Sasha in a corner then bumps her off buckles! Shotzi stomps away, then drags Sasha up again to DECK her with a forearm! Shotzi dares Sasha to get back up, and then she ENZIGURIS Sasha back down! Shotzi runs as Sasha goes to the apron, and she WRECKS Sasha with a dropkick!

Shotzi goes out, and SMACKS Sasha off the tank! And then throws her into barriers! And then SMACKS her off the front of her tank again! Shotzi puts Sasha in the tank, climbs up top, and SUPER SENTONS! Shotzi howls to the moon, but will she be in for some legit consequences?

 

Backstage interview with Jeff Hardy.

The Charismatic Enigma is back on SmackDown officially, but what is he most looking forward to? He is so pumped to be here. He’s looking forward to a fresh start, facing new opponents, and maybe, just maybe challenging for a title he’s never held before. But then “Happy” Corbin and “Mad Cap” Moss walk in, laughing it up. Corbin says it is good to have Hardy here. Things have changed. Corbin is happy because he’s winning at life. And best of all, Hardy can watch Corbin & Moss beat up Boogs & Nakamura in a Trick or Street Fight. To celebrate this Halloween de-boo, how about a Halloween joke? Why don’t witches have kids? Their boyfriends have hollow weenies.

Well, it’s good to be back on SmackDown, but will tonight be no laughing matter for the dad joke duo?

 

SmackDown shares the additional sanctions put on Brock Lesnar.

After The Beast assaulted referees, fellow superstars and backstage producers, an indefinite suspension was handed down by Adam Pearce, only for Pearce to face the wrath of Brock Lesnar, as well! Pearce communicates from his home via video and again says Lesnar’s actions were reprehensible, and an act of total cowardice. How dare he attack the heart of the corporate engine? Pearce gives every piece of himself to this company and he will not…! Pearce calms down and says he will not be disrespected. This cannot and will not happen again. Pearce informed Lesnar on the phone that due to those actions, on top of the suspension, Lesnar is fined the sum of $1 MILLION!

Heyman is watching backstage and seems rather surprised by what he heard. Kayla Braxton walks over and asks how Lesnar will respond to this. Heyman is amazing she is still employed. But he knows how the Tribal Chief would respond. Roman Reigns would show up on SmackDown, smash everyone in sight, including Brock Lesnar, but Roman doesn’t have to do that because Roman smashed Lesnar at Crown Jewel. Okay… But again, how would Lesnar respond? Heyman repeats the question back and Kayla says this isn’t a trick. Heyman was Lesnar’s advocate, they want insight only Heyman can give.

Well Lesnar would rip everyone’s throats, starting with Adam Pearce! What an annoying man. The temerity of Pearce to talk about Lesnar like Lesnar wasn’t even in the arena and isn’t BROCK LESNAR and be a Beast! Like BROCK LE- Heyman calms himself down now, and says that’s how he thinks it would go. Heyman defends he has not spoken to Lesnar. So leave him alone, okay? Heyman hurries away, but are there still allegiances not even Heyman is aware of?

 

Drew McIntyre heads to the ring!

The Scottish Warrior has another open challenge on hand! Who will answer the call? We find out after the break!

Open Challenge: Drew McIntyre VS ???

SmackDown returns and McIntyre gets the mic. “This may come as a surprise to absolutely nobody, but Drew McIntyre is in an ass-kicking mood.” We surely don’t want open mic night, so how about an Open Challenge? Well you heard the fans! They want it, McIntyre wants it, who has the “testicular fortitude” to fight McIntyre right now?! The gauntlet has been thrown down, and here comes Mustafa Ali! Ali also has a mic and says “We get it, we get it. You’re big, you’re bad, but I’m better.” Ali has more athletic talent in his pinkie than McIntyre does in his entire body! Ali is quicker, more agile, and when it comes to in-ring talent, McIntyre doesn’t compare.

Ali tells McIntyre that he will be the one to beat him tonight! The bell rings and the two approach. Ali talks trash< McIntyre uses both hands to TOSS Ali! Ali dodges in the corner and CHOPS, but McIntyre doesn’t even flinch! Ali CHOPS again, still nothing. McIntyre grins and CHOPS Ali off his feet! Ali flounders away, BOOTS back from the corner, and dropkicks McIntyre’s arm! Ali fires away on that arm but McIntyre shoves him away. Ali KICKS the bad arm, runs, but into an OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! McIntyre snarls, grabs Ali with both and throws him to a corner! McIntyre stomps away, CHOPS, then OVERHEAD Belly2Belly suplexes again!

Ali returns but into a NECKBREAKER! McIntyre kips up and fires up, as do the fans! McIntyre underhooks, Ali fights out, baits McIntyre into a corner and POSTS him! McIntyre is down, Ali goes up! Ali aims and 450 but has to roll through! Ali gets under the Claymore kick to run and tilt-o-whirl, but McIntyre blocks the DDT! McIntyre powers out to get a KIMURA ARMLOCK! Ali taps, McIntyre wins!

Winner: Drew McIntyre, by submission

The Beacon shined for a second but McIntyre shows he isn’t just big and strong but has the technical savagery to win! Will the Scottish Warrior continue to slay the SmackDown roster?

Ali gets on the mic to vent. “You people choose to cheer for Drew McIntyre! You choose to root against me! And the only reason, the ONLY reason you choose to root against me is because my name is Mustafa Ali!” Ali throws down the mic but is he reverting back to the excuses he used to use to deflect?

 

The New Day walk backstage.

Kofi Kingston tells everyone to stand to their feet and show King Xavier respect. They spot Hit Row watching. He welcomes them to his kingdom and to SmackDown. They were incredible in SmackDown, and he loves seeing fellow musicians out there “doing the damn thing.” They appreciate him saying that. Hit Row gets to rub shoulders with royalty? Damn. Shouldn’t they respect the king. “We’re not worthy! We’re not worthy!” Xavier allows them to rise. Kofi wants to hear them spit some hot fire for their king. “Bet.” King~ Woods~! King~ Woods~! They doubted he could be they knew that he would.

Woods and Kofi head to the ring as it is being prepared for another royal ceremony. The king is going to have a knight, after the break!

 

Xia Li is coming.

Who will be the first to feel her wrath?

 

SmackDown returns and…

Hear ye, hear ye, lend Kofi your ears that you may listen to the creed of King Woods. Woods calls to Pennsylvania. “Tis I, your king.” “HAIL! KING WOODS! HAIL! KING WOODS!” Woods wishes for a moment. Yes, last week, he finally received his Cape of Defense, his Scepter of Seduction, and Kofi was kind enough to place the crown upon his head, officially making him king. But everyone knows that a king is only as strong as the company he keeps. Fans chant, “You Deserve It!” Yes, Woods does deserve it. A lot of behind the scenes stuff to get here. Kofi’s heart is true, and is Woods’ most trusted confidant. Kofi, please bend the knee.

Kofi kneels before Woods, and Woods hopes Kofi’s bravery and strength become a shining example to the WWE Universe. King Woods, first of his name and bringer of new days, bestows this honor upon Kofi, making him SIR Kofi Kingston, The Hand of the King! You may rise. “Sir! Ko-fi! Sir! Ko-fi!” Woods also pins a unicorn medal to Kofi’s vest. REJOICE! The fans cheer, but the Usos come out to say “Whoa! Whoa! WHOA!” Hold on, Uce. Their they go again! It’s the Usos and the New Day. So what we got here? King Woods and the King’s Hand, Sir Kofi, huh? Well they the right hand man!

A lot’s changed since the New Day left. This is THEIR show! Call it the Bloodline show! Cuz #WeTheOnes! Halloween is Sunday, what’re they doing playing dress up? Kofi laughs and sees what this is. This is jealousy. They jealous cuz the New Day looking crispy clean in their new outfits, while the Usos wearing the same things since 2018. And they can’t get blood on the carpet, they just got this clean. Oh, they got jokes, huh? They won’t be laughing when Jimmy kicks that crown off Woods’ big ass head! Is that a threat, bruh?! SILENCE!! Because of their insolence, tonight will be the Usos and the New Day, in a TRIAL BY COMBAT. AKA a match. Challenge accepted!

But is that real gold? Jey wants to touch but Kofi slaps his hand down and says, “No no no.” But then Jimmy DECKS Kofi! Woods run the Usos off but this is far from over! Will we see the Usos and the New Day reignite their rivalry?

 

Trick or Street Fight Tag: Shinsuke Nakamura & Rick Boogs VS “Happy” Corbin & “Mad Cap” Moss

It’s time to rock! Boogs plays Nakamura’s theme as they head to the ring, ready to settle things with the pair of Jackass O’ Lanterns! Will this be a treat for the King of Strong Style and his rockin’ bard? Or will Corbin & Moss have the last laugh after all?

SmackDown returns and the duo of Corbin and Moss make their entrance. And they get pyro? The bell rings and the brawl is on! Moss is after Boogs and throws him out, Corbin whips but Nakamura reverses to GAMANGIRI! Nakamura hits a SLIDING KNEE, but Moos hurries in. Nakamura knees him low and AX KICKS him down! Boogs gut wrenches Moss around and around and then THROWS him into the pumpkins! Boogs hurries to get his guitar and he plays for the GOOD VIBRATIONS~! But Corbin kendo stick SMACKS Boogs down! Corbin throws Boogs into the ring, Moss drags Nakamura out. Corbin chokes Boogs on ropes but doesn’t have to let off because of No DQ!

Wait, Reggie jumps in!? The Viking Raiders are chasing him and the 24/7 Championship! Drew Gulak grabs at Reggie but he flips and flies out of the ring! Corbin is annoyed, but Boogs sends him into a corner! DOUBLE CLOTHESLINES knock both men down! Moss gets Boogs up and throws him out to throw hands. “This your boy, huh, Pat? How ’bout them apples?” But Boogs blocks the apple dunk! He tries to dunk Moss in return, Nakamura SMACKS him with a kendo stick! Boogs dunks Moss, Moss comes up with an apple, and Nakamura SMACKS him down! Cheers with apples as SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns again and Boogs gets mugged by kendo stick smacks from Corbin and Moss! Fans boo as Corbin chokes Boogs and Moss knocks Nakamura off the apron. Corbin lets off to bring Boogs up and thro him out hard. Moss and Corbin bring Boogs and Nakamura up to throw into barriers! Fans chant, “We Want Pumpkins!” but Corbin shoves candy in Boogs’ face! Moss laughs but Nakamura kicks Corbin then ROUNDHOUSES him! The candy goes flying into the crowd! Nakamura fires a strike fest off on Moss, but Moss ducks and Nakamura’s kick goes into the post! Moss then CLOBBERS Nakamura with a clothesline!

Moss and Corbin regroup, bring Nakamura around and put him in the ring. Corbin picks up a pumpkin and the fans go wild! Corbin throws it away and gets in the ring. He and Moss mug Nakamura, Moss knocks Boogs off the apron. Corbin DECKS Nakamura, then they go outside the ring. They bring Nakamura to the table, but Boogs smashes pumpkins! Fans fire up as Boogs gives Moss a smack of pumpkin, then he uses the skeleton to smack away on Corbin and Moss! Boogs gets in the ring, Corbin chases but gets a LAIRAT! Moss gets in, Boogs LARIATS him, too! Nakamura returns with his own kendo stick! Boogs joins in, they pinball Moss around!

Boogs gut wrenches Corbin for a SUPLEX into the FLYING KNEE! Cover, but Moss breaks it up with a dead lift and FALL AWAY SLAM! But Boogs shows his power as he gives Moss an EXPLODER! Corbin staggers but he gives Boogs a DEEP SIX! But Nakamura kicks and gets Corbin with the WHEEL KICK! Nakamura aims from a corner, but Moss puts a pumpkin on Nakamura’s head! Corbin CLOBBERS pumpkin head Nakamura! Corbin and Moss double whip Boogs into a corner, Corbin runs in but Boogs POSTS him then CLOBBERS Moss! Nakamura CLOBBERS Corbin into the timekeeper’s area! Boogs gets Moss up, EXPLODER!

Boogs goes up top, fans fire up, but two men in costume SMACK him with kendo stick! Moss gives Boogs a NECKBREAKER to a pumpkin! Cover, Moss & Corbin win!!

Winners: “Happy” Corbin & “Mad Cap” Moss, by pinfall

The men in costume reveal themselves to be ANGEL GARZA AND HUMBERTO CARRILLO! The most handsome tag team in the WWE just screwed over Nakamura and Boogs! What a way to make an impact on SmackDown! But will their future be looking any good going after the King of Strong Style like that?

 

Backstage interview with Sonya Deville.

Naomi has a match with Shayna Baszler later tonight and some are saying Sonya’s stacking the deck against her. Is there any bias? No, she is a professional, and Megan’s boss, so- Sami Zayn walks in and interrupts. He just wants to tell Sonya it is a mistake to not have the “locker room leader” on the card tonight. It certainly wasn’t Sonya’s fault or her intention, but she’s going to need someone like him on her side. Survivor Series is just around the corner, after all. SmackDown cuts away from this to go to the ring!

Naomi VS Shayna Baszler!

SmackDown is going to #FeelTheGlow, but will Naomi get revenge for that 2v1 on at least one of her opponents? Or will the Queen of Spades break Naomi in body and spirit?

SmackDown returns and Shayna makes her entrance. Wait, where’s the ref? Sonya Deville walks out and says she understands there’s an issue. She tells Naomi that she is here because she forgot to mention something. After what Lesnar did last week, the ref meant for this match got injured. So Sonya needs to find someone professional and fair minded to step up to the plate last minute. And no one is better suited for this than Sonya. She asks for a spare ref shirt and gets one from the ring crew. She trades her suit jacket for the referee shirt and Naomi already doesn’t like where this is going. The bell rings and the match begins.

Shayna and Naomi tie up, Shayna gets around but Naomi throws her away. Naomi runs in but Shayna still goes for the clutch! Naomi drops, rolls but Shayna gets the foot! Naomi kicks away and gets free of the heel hook, then throws forearms! Shayna shoves her away, Naomi ducks and dodges to RANA Shayna to ropes! Naomi runs in at the corner to forearm smash! Naomi headlocks to BULLDOG Shayna into buckles! Sonya and Naomi argue, Naomi ROUNDHOUSES Shayna. Naomi springboards but trips! Naomi gets up fast and ENZIGURIS! Cover, but Sonya doesn’t count! Shayna turns things around, Sonya fast counts, Shayna wins!!

Winner: Shayna Baszler, by pinfall

Naomi gets mad at Sonya for the blatant rigging of this match, but Sonya tells her to stand down. KIRAFUDA KLUTCH! Naomi drops as Shayna squeezes tight. Sonya leaves this behind and Naomi is out! Will Sonya continue to abuse her power and abuse Naomi at the same time?

 

Backstage interview with The New Day.

Kayla asks King Woods if he’s worried that his reign is being threatened. Woods knows that of course people would come after the throne, just as he did. He doesn’t hold it against anyone. But please understand that with The Hand of the King, literally nothing will go wrong. Kofi was named the Hand of the King to protect Woods. They’ve always had each other’s back, but the pin right here means it is for the kingdom. And it is time for them to dole out their very first royal ass-whooping! The music plays and the New Day head to the ring!

 

Backstage interview with Naomi.

She cuts off Megan and says that if Sonya ever decides to put away her little suit and get in the ring again, Naomi’s waiting for her. And if Shayna wants to step to Naomi again, all she’ll see is the Rear View and then some.

 

The Usos VS The New Day!

SmackDown returns and the Usos make their entrance. The teams sort out and Woods starts with Jey. They tie up, Jey knees low then whips Woods to a corner. Woods goes up and over and things speed up as he ducks and dodges. Woods slides to then DECK Jey! Cover, TWO! Woods brings Jey up, wrenches and tags in Kofi. Woods whips Jey, Kofi hits a FLYING FOREARM! Cover, TWO! Kofi mocks #WeTheOnes and uppercuts Jey. Jimmy tags in as Kofi whips, Jey reverses and the Usos double elbow Kofi down. They then drop double elbows, Jimmy covers, TWO! Jimmy CHOPS Kofi, then puts him in a corner for another CHOP!

Jimmy whips, Kofi goes up and missile dropkicks back! Jey tags in, Kofi clotheslines Jimmy out, Woods points Jey out to Kofi and Kofi dodges while Woods dropkicks Jey out! The Usos regroup but Kofi goes up, SUPER TRUST FALL, but the Usos catch him! They TOSS Kofi into the timekeeper’s area! The Usos talk trash on Woods’ knight as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns once more and Kofi fights out of the Usos’ corner! Jey tags in, Jimmy gets around to scoop, BACKBREAKER and an AX HANDLE from Jey! Jey covers, TWO! Jey stalks Kofi to an open corner, Jimmy talks trash but gets away as Kofi swipes at him. “UCE!” “SO!” “UCE!” “SO!” and Jey runs in to HIP ATTACK! Jey holds up a finger cuz #WeTheOnes but Woods coaches Kofi. “Ain’t no ‘Sir Kofi!'” Jey rains down fists, runs corner to corner but into a DOUBLE STOMP! Both men are down and fans fire up! Kofi and Jey crawl, hot tags to Jimmy and Woods! The King of the Ring rallies on Jimmy, ducks and dodges to LEG LARIAT!

Woods whips, Jimmy reverses but Woods tilt-o-whirls and RUSSIAN LEG SWEEPS! Woods runs to basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Woods drags Jimmy up to throw hands, Jimmy staggers and Woods CHOPS him. Woods throws more hands, another CHOP, and another CHOP! Machine gun CHOPS! Woods whips, Jimmy reverses and wrenches to ROCK Woods with an uppercut! But Woods mule kicks back, and then reels Jimmy in for a suplex GUT BUSTER! Cover, TWO! Jimmy survives but Woods drags him up. Jimmy kicks, Woods blocks, DRAGON WHIP! Jey tags in, Woods throws Jimmy out but Jey back suplexes to a NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO!

Jey argues with the ref but Jey goes back to Woods. Jey pushes Woods around, eggs him on, and Woods ROCKS him with a forearm! Jey hits back, runs but into a forearm! Woods runs, Jey follows and hits back! Kofi tags in as Jey runs, Jimmy also tags in! Jey dodges and SUPERKICKS Woods! Kofi FLYING AX HANDLES Jey! Jimmy dodges Trouble in Paradise to pop-up SAMOAN DROP! Cover, TWO! Kofi survives, Jey tags back in. The Usos get the corners, DOUBLE SUPERKICKS on Kofi!! Cover, TWO!?? Tag back to Jimmy and they each get a corner again. The Usos go up top but Woods trips Jey up! Jimmy USO SPLASHES onto knees!

Kofi DECKS Jey, but Jimmy rolls Kofi! TWO!! Kofi boots from a corner, Woods tags in! Jimmy SUPERKICKS Kofi down and covers but Woods Oklahoma Rolls, New Day win!!

Winners: The New Day, by pinfall

Another HUGE win in this rivalry, and now the King and his knight have pinned the SmackDown Tag Team Champions! Will Woods and Kofi soon reign as champions once again?


My Thoughts:

A very good SmackDown, but still with quite a few lumps that could’ve been smoothed out. I do like that we opened with the women’s title story and that Shotzi got a part to play in it, but the match looked like they were holding back. Charlotte certainly isn’t the Face in this, Sasha still has the same attitude she had as a Heel but I guess she’s Face by default now. Shotzi could be seen as Heel now after snapping on Sasha, but she is justified that Sasha didn’t really need to be there and her distraction backfired and cost Shotzi. I wouldn’t mind if they did spice things up and went for more a Triple Threat before Survivor Series rather than just Charlotte VS Sasha.

I like that they used a kayfabe fine on Lesnar to rile up Heyman and continue to tease him being torn between Lesnar and Roman. Also hasn’t Lesnar made way more than a million dollars? I think he can handle that fine just fine. Decent promo interview for Jeff Hardy, and I do hope he gets to skip the midcard slog, aka Corbin and Moss, to give Roman a challenge at some point. The Trick or Street Fight was pretty fun, and I was surprised to see Carrillo & Garza get involved at the end there. I suppose after Nakamura VS Corbin for the Intercontinental Championship happens, there will be more tag division involvement from Nakamura and Boogs through a feud with Carrillo & Garza.

I like that McIntyre is having really good matches with “random” opponents, and I guess this is one way of keeping him preoccupied while waiting to get after Roman and the Universal Championship. Ali had a great showing, but I don’t like him having to revert to “You fans are racist!” I thought he got over that during the Retribution debacle. I’m thinking this is mostly just what happens when WWE has no idea what to do with Ali but they still want to feature him prominently. Ali would’ve had a better post match moment just throwing a generic tantrum. Kinda hoping they keep his feud with Mansoor going so that Mansoor can actually throw this in Ali’s face. The fans cheer Mansoor, they boo Ali, because it’s their personalities, not their names.

Naomi’s story with Sonya is developing fine, and a rigged special referee match was a nice touch. I still hope Naomi turns to The Bloodline and their influence for help. If the Tribal Chief is looking after his family, that includes the wife of his cousin. Also I have a feeling Sami’s talk with Sonya will lead to him being Team SmackDown’s captain for Survivor Series. Woods knighting Kofi was a good move for the King of the Ring story, and they had a great tag match with the Usos. It is clear they’re going to have a tag title match to see who goes to Survivor Series, and that could go either way. I think it’s been a long time since a King of the Ring also held a title, so Woods also getting that honor would be really cool.

My Score: 8.4/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (1/17/22)

Is Becky Lynch sweatin’ Doudrop?

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WWE Raw 2022

The Man prepares for the Royal Rumble!

“Doudrop” Piper Niven is coming for the Raw Women’s Championship, and she won’t be Manhandled so easily! How will Becky Lynch counter Piper’s power?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bianca Belair & Liv Morgan VS “Doudrop” Piper Niven & Becky Lynch; Piper & Becky win.
  • Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens; Kevin wins.
  • Finn Balor VS Austin Theory; Theory wins.
  • Nikki A.S.H. VS Rhea Ripley; No Contest.
  • Reggie w/ Dana Brooke VS Omos; Omos wins.
  • 8 Man Tag: The Street Profits & The Mysterios VS Apollo Crews, Commander Azeez & The Dirty Dawgs; The Street Profits & Mysterios win.
  • Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Seth Rollins; Lashley wins, by disqualification.

PLAY BY PLAY

Becky Lynch heads to the ring!

Tulsa, Oklahoma, The Man has come ’round! Fans chant her name as she gets the mic, and she welcomes them to the Big Time! “Now we are less than two weeks away from the Royal Rumble, and the Raw Women’s Division has never been hotter. And whether you like to admit it or not, there’s only one person responsible for that, and that’s me.” Becky says it is so hot that there are stars from generations past, like Lita, Mickie James and the Bella Twins, all hoping that they can win the Rumble and challenge the #VanGOAT at WrestleMania. Face it, they need Becky because she makes stars.

Look no further than Doudrop. Becky has kindly given her the biggest opportunity of her life, a taste of the Big Time at one of the biggest events of the year. The people didn’t get her that! Piper Niven didn’t get it for herself. Becky did that! That is what Becky does! She makes people better, than she beats ’em! But Becky will admit that she admires Piper’s tenacity. She came from the rolling hills of Scotland and made a name for herself. Well no, someone else had to make up a name for her. So Becky will shoot it straight for “Doudou.” A doudrop will never be champion so long as The Man is still here.

But speaking of, here she comes! Piper storms right up to the ring, gets herself a mic and says she’s gonna tell Becky something. “You didn’t get me anything. I got myself this title match at Royal Rumble. But if it was really your plan to face me instead of Bianca, than it’s the biggest mistake you’ve ever made. Just make sure you stay well out of my way tonight.” Becky says she did get Piper that win last week, and if Piper just follows her lead, they’ll get a win here tonight. But here comes Bianca Belair! “Oh, Becky. You really out here spittin’ all this nonsense about being the GOAT, the greatEST of all time, but let me remind y’all that you can’t spell greatest without E S T.”

Bianca joins Piper and Becky in the ring as fans chant for “EST! EST!” Bianca reminds us SHE is the EST of WWE. And Doudrop, uh, okay. The only reason Piper is facing Becky is because Ms. Big Time was so scared of Bianca, she interfered in last week’s match. But girl, uh-uh. That’s just buyin’ time. Because Bianca is officially entering the Royal Rumble match! And it’s gonna be every woman for themselves, so if Bianca’s gotta throw out every 29 other women like she did last year, she’ll do it. Then she’ll go main event WrestleMania… again. And Bianca can go after whichever champion she wants, which could be Becky or Piper.

But now, Bianca’s tag partner, Liv Morgan, arrives! “Well, well, well, Bianca. We may be tag teaming tonight, but I am also officially entering myself in the Royal Rumble match. And that’s not all, that’s not all. Because in two weeks, I’m also the one winning it.” But that means Bianca will be one of the 29 she outlasts on the way to WrestleMania. But since we’re on the same page- Piper pretends to snore and then says this is boring. Everyone, shut up and ref, get in here! Piper wants to fight, but it’s Becky who riles up Liv and Bianca, and then uses Piper as a shield! Piper welcomes someone to bring it, but this starts after the break.

 

Chad Gable prepares a speech.

“Greetings and salutations…” Otis walks over, the valedictorian of The Alpha Academy. Will this graduation ceremony go off without a hitch?

 

Bianca Belair & Liv Morgan VS “Doudrop” Piper Niven & Becky Lynch!

Raw returns and the bell rings, and Bianca dropkicks Piper! Piper stays up but Bianca whips. Piper blocks, reverses, but Bianca goes up tot ell Piper to kiss this. Then Bianca leaps over Piper, spins her around and reels her in, but Piper blocks the suplex. Piper suplexes, Bianca slips out and then dodges in the corner! Piper hits buckles, Bianca ROCKS Piper with a forearm, then runs in to ram Piper. Piper rebounds to run Bianca over! Piper runs, Becky tags in! Piper is annoyed with Becky but Becky says she’s got this. They argue, Becky turns around into a dropkick! Bianca kips up, tags Liv, Liv dodges Becky to DECK Piper and SHOTGUN Becky!

Becky is in a corner, Liv back body blocks, then SHINING WIZARDS! Liv whips, Becky reverses but Liv stops to back elbow. Liv goes up to leap and missile dropkick Becky down! Liv then brings Becky around, springboard CODE BREAKER! Cover, Piper breaks it! Bianca gets in to ROCK Piper, but she can’t lift Piper for the torture rack. Piper shoves Bianca into a corner and SPLASHES! Piper runs at Liv but Liv sends her out! Becky rolls Liv up, has feet on the ropes, TWO! Liv kicks low, KICKS again, then runs in, but Becky dodges! Liv elbows Becky again, but runs into a MANHANDLE SLAM! Cover, Piper breaks it?! But that was her own teammate!

Piper drags Becky out of the way, wants to cover, but she’s not legal! So Piper hurries back to her corner, tags herself in, and then runs to SPLASH Liv! Cover, Piper and Becky win!

Winners: “Doudrop” Piper Niven & Becky Lynch, by pinfall

Then Piper celebrates by giving Becky a VADER SEATED SENTON! Piper laughs as she looms over Becky, but will she have the last laugh at the Rumble?

 

Reggie and Dana Brooke talk with someone.

Reggie knows they’ve faced giants in their career, so can they give Reggie any advice when facing Omos tonight? The person he’s talking to is Edge! Edge thinks, and he tells Reggie that he can do things Edge can’t even comprehend. So he has a chance? Hell no! Beth Phoenix scolds Edge with a smack, and Edge says he still wishes Reggie luck. And Beth talks with Dana real quick. She’s seen Dana bust her butt for years here, so it’s so great Dana has a title. Dana thanks Beth for that, and hurries away to keep up with Reggie. Edge and Beth then see Damian Priest. They shake hands and hug and Priest is happy to see the Grit Couple.

Edge says he likes what he sees with Priest’s other side. Yeah, Priest’s other side is a bit edgy, but being serious here, Priest wants some ideas on the Rumble match. Edge has experience, having won two, one of which he won from starting first. There’s no better man to ask for pointers than Edge. Well cardio is one thing, but the main thing is to keep doing you. Priest’s style is working. Someone brings over a note for Beth, and it’s from Maryse. She wants to meet Beth 1v1, woman to woman. Edge says that’s suspicious. Beth is of course going to go but Edge is going to go with her. Beth agrees, and Edge says he and Priest can talk more later. What will the It Couple have planned for the Grit Couple?

Kevin Owens then walks over to ask Priest something. Kevin is looking forward to their match tonight. Really? Yeah, no lie! He’s looking- Oh, right, because Kevin’s so honest. Yes, especially having a good, clean match. Good competition, show off some technical prowess. But also that side, that nutso, vicious side. That side shouldn’t come out. Kevin is just hoping for them having a good, clean match. Kevin also has an announcement to make, so see you then. Good talk. Kevin and his tie hurries off, but will Priest keep Damian from tearing into the Prizefighter?

Kevin heads to the ring!

The KO Show is back, and tonight’s guest is Seth Freakin’ Rollins! What will Kevin ask his new best buddy? We find out, after the break.

Raw returns and Kevin welcomes us to his show. He wishes he could say it’s good to be here in Tulsa, but that would be a vile lie because this place is brutal. Don’t get mad at him telling the truth! And another truth is that Kevin has a very special guest. He is a man Kevin is proud to call his best friend, and after this man beats Roman Reigns at the Royal Rumble like he has in a plethora of matches before, he will be called the Universal Champion. Please welcome Seth! FRRRRREAKIN’! ROLLINS~! Rollins makes his way out to the ring, fired up as always, but especially now after having evaded a Bloodline beatdown on SmackDown last Friday.

Rollins takes up a mic and Kevin lets Rollins decide if they sit or stand. Rollins wants to stand, so he and Kevin kick the chairs aside. Kevin thanks Rollins for accepting his invitation to be a guest. Kevin wants to tell Rollins that he admires Rollins so much. There is so much Kevin admires about Rollins. From the great suits, like this striped one. He looks like a million bucks! MAHVELOUS! And even more so, Kevin admires Rollins’ courage. Do people realize how much guts it took for Rollins to show up on SmackDown, into the lion’s den, get face to face with Roman, and berate him into realizing that “The Head of the Table” is only possible because Rollins set the table.

“Yes, yes, yes! Kev, you hit the nail on the head right there!” Friday got a little testy, but the truth is, Roman’s rattled. Roman’s nervous, and dare Rollins say, Roman is scared. He’s scared! You heard it here first! Roman took the low road taking shots at Rollins’ family, sending the Usos after him. But everyone saw that the Usos couldn’t get the job done. Rollins says Roman is playing checkers while Rollins is playing chess! If Roman keeps this up, winning at the Rumble will be like taking candy from a baby. A little baby Roman! And Rollins will turn the title from blue to red and bring the Universal Championship back to their show, Monday Night Raw!

That’s huge! When Rollins wins, he’s staying on Raw with Kevin! Yes, 100%! Incredible! Then that means Raw has the best champion! Raw wouldn’t need Lesnar or Lashley, they’d have Rollins! Kevin again hits the nail on the head. Get rid of Lesnar. Rollins has a match with Lashley tonight, they can get rid of Lashley tonight! Who knows? Kevin likes the sound of that. But he has something of his own to announce and it is “earth shattering.” It will change the face of the industry! Right here and now, Kevin is officially declaring for the Royal Rumble! Rollins says that IS earth shattering!

Kevin will win the Rumble, Rollins will beat Roman, and the WWE Universe will get the match they… well, not deserve. But they’ll get the biggest Mania main-event ever! SETH FREAKIN’ ROLLINS VS KEVIN FREAKIN’ OWENS! Rollins likes where Kevin’s head is at. But here comes Damian Priest! Rollins says this is his time and Kevin’s show! If Priest steps any closer, Kevin will kick his ass! Kevin wants Rollins to stop but Priest tells Rollins to shut up! They’re both delusional idiots! There is not one person on this planet that believes Rollins will win at the Rumble. And Kevin is just a liar, so he isn’t winning, either.

And if Kevin doesn’t want to see Damian, then don’t wake him up. Oh and by the way, Priest talked with Pearce and Sonya. Their match tonight? That starts NOW! Kevin is freaking out, but Rollins tries to encourage him. Will it not matter when the Archer of Infamy takes aim?

 

Veer Mahaan.

In the animal kingdom, the lion bides its time as it hunts its prey. Step by step, until it finally strikes, leaving only scraps for the hyenas. When will the Million Dollar Arm finally strike?

 

Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens!

Raw returns and the bell rings. They tie up, Kevin waistlocks, but Priest pries free to wrench to a wristlock. Kevin rolls, headlocks, but Priest uses a chinbar to push Kevin back and power out. Kevin rams Priest, but then Kevin apologizes, Things speed up, Priest runs Kevin over with a shoulder! Priest runs in at the corner, but Kevin puts him on the apron! Kevin elbows Priest away, but Priest ROUNDHOUSES back! Priest steps in but into a SHOTGUN! Kevin stomps Priest at the ropes, lets off as the ref counts, then drags Priest to center for a SENTON! Kevin wraps on a chinlock and leans on Priest but fans rally up.

Priest fights up, priest the hold open but Kevin CLUBS him on the back. Kevin CHOPS, whips, but Priest reverses. Kevin KCISK back, CHOPS again, and CHOPS! Priest snarls, but Kevin apologizes again. This is just good, clean wrestling! Priest cools off, but then he fires off fast hands! WHEEL KICK! Kevin goes to a corner, Priest runs in but Kevin bails out. Fans boo, Priest keeps cool, but then Priest goes out the side. Priest runs in around the way, leaps off the steps, into a SUPERKICK! Kevin gets back in the ring to refresh the count, then FROG SPLASHES off the apron! Kevin roars while Priest sputters! Kevin drags Priest up and in as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Priest CLOBBERS Kevin! Fans fire up as Priest aims from a corner, and Priest throws haymakers! Priest fires off KICK after KICK, then a ROLLING ELBOW! Kevin rebounds, into a FLAPJACK! Priest runs at Kevin in the corner, for a big back elbow! Priest reels Kevin in, but Kevin wrenches out to ROCK Priest! Kevin whips, Priest rebounds to LARIAT! Priest gets Kevin up for the BROKEN ARROW! Cover, TWO! Priest is annoyed but he drags Kevin up. Priest ROCKS Kevin with a right, hoists him up top in the corner and ROCKS him again! Priest climbs up, but Kevin hits back!

Priest and Kevin brawl, Priest gets the edge. Priest brings Kevin up, but Kevin blocks the superplex! Kevin throws body shots, and even a headbutt! Kevin headbutts again, Priest falls down! Kevin adjusts, SWANTON BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Priest survives and Kevin thinks of what he has to do now. Kevin aims, kicks but no stunner! Kevin ducks the heel kick, tries gain, but Priest dragon sleepers! But Kevin slips free to pop Priest up, SIT-OUT POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO!! Priest survives again and Kevin is shocked! Fans rally up, Kevin aims, kicks, but Priest blocks to spin and ROUNDHOUSE! Kevin wobbles into a choke grip, SOUTH OF HEAVEN CHOKE SLAM! Cover, TWO!!

Priest is shocked that Kevin survives! Kevin rolls away to a corner but Priest follows. Priest throws hands, whips Kevin corner to corner, but Kevin falls, clutching his leg. The ref checks on Kevin, Kevin flounders up saying it’s cramping up. The ref wants a medic to check this, fans boo but Priest isn’t sure what to make of this. But then Kevin suckers him in for a STUNNER!! Cover, Kevin wins!

Winner: Kevin Owens, by pinfall

Priest was right about Kevin being a liar! But now, Kevin could also be a contender! Will Kevin add the US Championship to his Road to WrestleMania?

 

Backstage interview with Nikki A.S.H.

What is her plan heading into tonight’s match with former tag partner, Rhea Ripley? Nikki tells Sarah that this is no different than any other match. It is clear to Nikki now that she stands on her own, and she couldn’t feel any better. Rhea should be down and out, completely mortified after being proven the friend Nikki didn’t think she was. But Nikki, you were the one who attacked Rhea- Sarah, you need to get your facts straight! Rhea is the one who broke up the team. Rhea is the one who decided to take their friendship and flush it! She is the villain, not Nikki! And Nikki is the closest thing that the people of Tulsa will ever have to a real hero. She will be the People’s Hero.

And sometimes, heroes have to do things that regular people don’t understand. After tonight, Rhea will realize that she needs a superhero, whether she likes it or not. Nikki strikes her superhero pose and walks away, but will Rhea’s brutality smack some sense into her?

 

The Alpha Academy heads to the ring.

Pomp & Circumstance plays because today is Otis’ graduation! Will the NEW Raw Tag Team Champions be celebrating on top of their big title victory from last week?

Raw returns and Gable is at the podium. “Greetings and salutations my fellow colleagues and… Oh who am I kidding? I don’t have any colleagues here, considering I’m an Olympian with a Master’s Degree that did it with an immaculate 4.0 GPA! Thank you! Don’t do that. Don’t boo education. That’s gross, everybody.” But it makes sense, since the odds of anyone in Oklahoma having a Master’s, let alone graduating high school, are slim to none! Now shoosh! Tonight is about celebrating. Not just an institution but an individual. Gable could go on and on about himself, because his list is long.

But tonight is about a man who overcame the odds. An absolute tree trunk in the ring and a great student in the classroom. Gable’s prized pupil, his protégé, his number one guy, OTIS! Gable’s so proud. Last week, Otis applied the lessons and passed his final exam by decimating the moronic RKBRO and claimed the Academy’s rightful spot as tag team champions! So tonight, it is Gable’s honor and pleasure- Fans chant with “RKBRO! RKBRO!” They’re trying to have a ceremony for Otis! Gable presents to Otis, who has no last name anymore, the highest graduating honors from the Alpha Academy! The music plays again as they hug it out.

Gable says Otis has the floor. Look at that face! Otis thanks Chad, and says Gable has helped him reach his full potential. But now he has a warning: expect pure carnage for anyone who messes with the titles! They ain’t stopping, and they ain’t ever gonna stop! But here comes Matt Riddle! The Bro is in his own graduation gown, but it has mismatched sleeves… Riddle asks, “What’s up, bros? Big O, you’re looking pretty, pretty tight. And you guys don’t even wanna know what I had to get this graduation gown on time.” But when he got invited to this ceremony, he knew he had to make a very special speech.

Riddle brings out his speech, written on a napkin from this morning’s breakfast buffet. “Fellow graduates and Tulsinians. IT felt like just last week, Randy and I were the WWE Raw Tag Team Champions. We were livin’ on the edge, drivin’ with the top down, lettin’ the wind blow through our hair. We were just a couple o’ young, wild stallions runnin’ free. But today is graduation day. And our lives will change forever. Randy would always say, ‘Life comes at ya pretty fast.'” Gable stops him there, he has no idea what he’s going on about. Riddle was NOT invited to this. And Oklahoma can’t afford to lose another braincell, so just be on your way.

Riddle has “Gablestiltskin” take it easy. Riddle wants to say how proud he is of them. Them and their astronomical necks. See? He can use big words, too, Chad! Gable says Riddle is an idiot. He already ruined Otis’ night, so get to the point. RKBRO wants a rematch? Problem is, Riddle probably can’t even define the word rematch. Riddle so can! A rematch is… uh… when you have to light something up twice! Like a candle! But hey, a rematch sounds like a pretty sick idea. Fans wanna see it! Gable knew it. No wonder Orton left Riddle high and dry. Where even is he? Riddle unzips his gown to show off his “Hey Raaaandy” shirt.

Gable and Otis will give them a rematch, under one condition: they have to prove their mental aptitude in an Alpha Academy Academic Challenge! Otis suddenly looks worried. TO spell it out, it’s Riddle & Randy VS the Academy to prove the smarter team! Because we already saw who the physically dominant team is! Whoa, an academic challenge? Like Billy Madison? Or more like Wheel of Fortune? Riddle loves spinning that wheel, and maybe he and Otis could run in a giant hamster wheel. Gable kinda looks like a jacked hamster, but with three times the brains. Otis is furious and throws off his gown! Riddle wants Otis to back it up and cool off.

Otis storms up the ramp, barking about this being his night! But Orton gets in the ring to RKO Gable!! And then Riddle trips up Otis on the apron! RKBRO got one over on the Academy, and now Orton wears one of the red graduation gowns! Orton gets the mic to then tell the Academy, “We accept!” Will Riddle & Orton get PhDs in kicking the Academy’s asses?

 

Austin Theory visits Vince McMahon.

Theory thanks Vince for the rematch with Finn Balor. But uh, what’s Vince watching on his TV? It was the previous match, where Finn won. Oh… Theory knows he lost, but then he beat the hell outta Finn and nearly ended his career. In fact, it was like a half victory. No such thing. So tonight, Theory needs to beat Finn and beat him up. If Theory doesn’t, Vince will get someone to drag Theory to this office and Vince will beat Theory up! Smash him all over, and by the time he’s finished, it’ll just be blood, snot and broken teeth. Then Vince will take a selfie with that. And send it to Mama Theory! Oh… Theory has been warned, will he make good on this rematch?

 

WWE honors Martin Luther King Jr.

“Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. That all men would be guaranteed the unalienable rights of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” That dream of MLK’s, where we judge not by the color of skin but by character, is still alive. We will all reach the Promised Land together.

 

Finn Balor VS Austin Theory!

Raw returns and Theory makes his entrance. The Prince is back after being out a month, will he make Theory pay for every minute he’s missed? The bell rings, they circle and tie up, and Theory puts Finn on ropes. The ref counts, Theory lets off but Finn blocks the cheap shot to kick and headlock! Finn thrashes to grind Theory down, Theory powers out but Finn ducks and dodges, only for Theory to CLOBBER him with an elbow! Theory drags Finn out of the ring to smack off the apron! And then whip him into barriers! Theory goes into the ring and the ring count climbs. Finn stands but Theory goes out after him.

Theory whips, Finn reverses, and Theory hits barriers! Finn then hits a SLINGBLADE! Theory writhes, the count is rising, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Finn rallies, trips and DOUBLE STOMPS Theory down! Theory goes to a corner, Finn runs in and CHOPS! Finn whips Theory corner to corner, Theory reverse but Finn reverses back, ELBOW DROP DDT! Cover, TWO! Finn snarls, Theory crawl to ropes and Finn KICKS him out of the ring! Finn drags Theory up but Theory HOTSHOTS! Theory somersaults in, but into a SLINGBLADE! Finn then runs, into a LARIAT from Theory! Theory hauls Finn up to FLAPJACK HOTSHOT! Fireman’s carry, A T- NO! Finn makes it a roll up, TWO! Theory and Finn get up, and Finn goes to the apron. Finn shoulders into Theory, GAMANGIRIS, then climbs up!

But Theory avoids the Coup De Grace to somersault SHOTGUN! Fireman’s carry, A T L!! Cover, Theory wins!

Winner: Austin Theory, by pinfall

Theory saves himself from Vince’s wrath, and he gets his victory selfie. But to make good on what Vince told him, Theory fires off fists! Theory then drags Finn up, fireman’s carries again, for another A T L! Theory tells Finn to expect the unexpected. But will Finn find a way to teach Theory and Mr. McMahon respect for The Prince?

 

Nikki A.S.H. VS Rhea Ripley!

Before the match, Rhea is interviewed backstage. How does she respond to Nikki saying it was Rhea who ruined the relationship? Rhea says she never intended for this to hurt their friendship. But Nikki made up her mind. Rhea isn’t one to forgive very easily, so what kind of hero attacks a friend? If Rhea’s the villain here, than Nikki’s more delirious than Rhea thought. It’s time to remind everyone who Rhea Ripley is. Is Nikki in for a Nightmare tonight?

Raw returns and Nikki makes her entrance, but then so do Queen Zelina Vega and Carmella. Mella says, “Hear ye, hear ye, Tulsa. The Most Beautiful Woman in All of WWE and Your Queen have arrived to tell everyone in this dusty arena that everything we predicted about Nikki A.S.H. has come true.” Zelina’s word is absolute, and therefore she is correct by default. Not only is she a beloved queen, but also a fairy godmother. Rhea would never have been rid of Nikki without their little push. Rhea should be thanking them! Because they’ve been telling Rhea for weeks that if she stuck with an Almost Superhero, she’d never be nothing more than an almost threat.

But seems things are too late. Rhea doesn’t look like anything more than a low class loser. Without Nikki as her security blanket, does Rhea have what it takes? As Zelina’s said, you’re either the most powerful women in the room, or you’re nothing. Zelina is queen, but Rhea will be standing there, covered in trash, looking for someone to leech off of. Rhea doesn’t have the guts to be champion all on her own. Rhea tells them to bring it, then, but Nikki goes after Rhea! The ref wants Nikki to let off, but Nikki keeps hammering Rhea down! Rhea hits back but Nikki throws Rhea down! Nikki is seething, and then she drags Rhea up. Rhea kicks Nikki away but Nikki throws her out!

Nikki WRECKS Rhea with a dropkick, then goes out to RAM her into steel steps! The Almost Superhero leaves Rhea down, but the match is called off. Will Rhea get right? Or will she get revenge?

 

Dana Brooke and Reggie regroup backstage.

What did they talk about? Staying low and staying mobile. That’s right! Reggie is faster, stronger and amazing! Use Omos’ size against him, tire him out, and go for the legs. Meanwhile, R-Truth, Akira Tozawa, Tamina, and a referee are watching while eating popcorn. Dana says Reggie can be vicious and ruthless while also super athletic. Reggie says, “Who am I kidding?” He ran into Omos full speed and bounced off him! Dana says Reggie is the most capable man she knows. Just stay away from him. But even Dana looks worried. Truth says Dana must really hate Reggie. She just told him to get got! Will Reggie even survive his run-in with Omos?

Reggie w/ Dana Brooke VS Omos!

Raw returns and Reggie makes his entrance. Dana is cheering him on, but she still looks very worried. Omos points out the clear height difference, and then he roars! Even that scares Reggie! But then here come the 24/7 Championship hunters! Dana runs into the ring, scoots under Omos and out the other side. Omos catches Tozawa, TOSSES him out, then CLOBBERS Truth! Tamina stares Omos down and Reggie climbs the corner. Tamina goes around Omos, the bell rings, and Reggie leaps! Into Omos’ arms! Omos uses both hands for the MOUNTAIN TOSS! Omos says it’s that easy. Cover, Omos wins.

Winner: Omos, by pinfall

Omos didn’t break a sweat with that one! Will the colossus of Raw continue to dominate until he’s on top of the world?

 

Maryse heads to the ring!

As her note said, she is here to talk with Beth face-to-face. But will that all this be? Or do Miz & Mrs. have a plan for the Glamazon? We find out, after the break.

Raw returns and Maryse has a mic to say, “Bonsoir (good evening), Tulsa.” She assures us The Miz couldn’t make it. He has a very big mouth and likes to agree to things without asking her first, so tonight, she is cleaning up his mess. She then asks Beth to come out alone so they can do this right. Woman to woman, wife to wife and mother to mother, Maryse wants to talk. Beth makes her entrance, but Edge still follows her out. Maryse wants Edge to wait on the ramp until they’ve had this conversation. There aren’t many ways to put this, but the match at the Rumble, it has to be canceled. Uh, okay. This oughta be good, so Beth is all ears.

Maryse says she doesn’t want it, surely Beth doesn’t want it, and the fans don’t want it! Fans boo, they DO want it. Maryse is trying to have a heartfelt moment, guys. Really? Really? Really? Maryse is sure sounding like Miz here… Maryse says she has the mic, so she can be louder than everyone here. It doesn’t matter what you think! Now she’s The Rock? But anyway, Maryse wants Beth to listen. They’re from the same generation in WWE. They fought together. Remember those two minute matches? Fans chant, “You Suck!” but Maryse asks if they’re done.

But Beth, c’mon. They fought together and made the Women’s Division what it is today! They’re great at what they do! Just look at them! Women nowadays main event WrestleMania thanks to these two! So if anything, Maryse thinks that they should be on the same team. They should be a unit! Friends! Even their daughters can be friends! They can have play dates, dinners, or even just a coffee. Beth wants Maryse to know that she speaks for everyone here when she says, “Just shut up!” Seriously? BFF’s? Playdates? Is anyone buying this? NOPE! So that means Maryse takes acting lessons from The Miz.

Beth boils it down to a simple answer: the match is NOT off. Beth is NOT missing the chance to tag team with her husband for the first time ever. And she is NOT missing the chance to Glam Slam Maryse’s ass through the canvas! In fact, why not give the fans a preview? Beth storms up to the ring but Maryse stays put. Wait, Miz attacks Edge at the ramp! But Edge DECKS Miz! Maryse really was lying about Miz being at home! But then Maryse CLOBBERS Beth with her purse! What’s in that bag?! Maryse and Miz decide to show us: it was a BRICK! A literal BRICK! Maryse tosses her hair back and celebrates with The Miz. But will Edge and Beth only look to break The It Couple for that one?

 

The Street Profits are fired up backstage!

Angelo Dawkins & Montez Ford have a dream! The dream is that they have a plan and will execute it and win! The best part is, they do it in Tulsa, Oklahoma~! YESSIR! All the bodies in the ring, it’ll be like a mini Rumble. Which is great cuz the Profits were the first to declare for this year’s Rumble! Their first one, tossin’ bodies! But will Ford throw Dawkins? Rey Mysterio & Dom walk over to say not to worry. They’re a team tonight, and they’ll also be in the Rumble. Rey has to get this off his chest: Los Mysterios will outlast 28 other men in the Rumble. And then, not only will they throw those guys out, they’ll take the Mysterio name back to the Mania main event!

Okay, all due respect, that’s only if the Profits don’t make it there first. Because the Profits are up! And WE WANT THE SMOKE! Will these four burn it down to then light it up on the Road to WrestleMania?

8 Man Tag: The Street Profits & The Mysterios VS Apollo Crews, Commander Azeez & The Dirty Dawgs!

Raw returns and the Dawgs make their entrance. Then the Pride of Nigeria and his right hand man make their entrance. Teams sort out, Dolph Ziggler starts against Dom. They tie up, Dom waistlocks but Ziggler elbows free. Ziggler talks trash, runs, but Dom follows to RANA! Dom runs at Ziggler in the corner but Ziggler CLOBBERS Dom! Tag to Robert Roode and he stomps Dom. Roode drags Dom up, suplexes, but Dom knees free! Dom kicks low, tags Rey, and Rey gets a boost to RANA! Rey whips, Roode reverses but Rey dodges and tilt-o-whirl headscissors! Rey runs in but Roode puts him on the apron. Rey DECKS Roode, climbs, and leaps, but the rana is blocked

Roode brings Rey up, but Rey RANAS Roode out of the ring! Ziggler and Dom get in, Dom whips but Ziggler throws Dom up and out! Ford and Dawkins DROPKCIK Ziggler out! All eight men are on the outside now and shouting, but the ref keeps the peace while Raw goes to break!

Raw returns, Roode tags Ziggler and the Dawgs double whip Rey to double elbow him down. Then the Dawgs hit Rey’s corner to knock everyone down! Fans boo but Ziggler drags Rey over to tag Apollo. Apollo hits a STANDING MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Ziggler is upset on Apollo’s behalf, but Apollo decides he’ll finish it now. Apollo gets Rey up, trophy lifts, but Rey fights free to a DDT! Both men are down and fans fire up! Rey crawls, Dawks is back! Hot tag to the Curse of Greatness! And he rallies on everyone! He hurdles Apollo to hit a FLYING BACK ELBOW! Roode runs into an EXPLODER! Ziggler runs into an EXPLODER!

Dawkins gives Apollo a CYCLONE SPLASH, then the SILENCER! But Azeez gets in to break the cover! Ford returns to ENZIGURI Azeez out! The Dawgs TOSS Ford out! But the Mysterios dropkick the Dawgs onto the ropes! STEREO 619’s! Dom goes up and out to LEAP at Azeez! But Azeez catches him! Rey jumps to add on, the Mysterios take out Azeez! But Apollo rolls Dawkins up! TWO, and pop-up for SKY HIGH! Tag to Ford, he’s up top! FROM THE HEAVENS!! Cover, the Profits & Mysterios win!

Winners: The Street Profits & The Mysterios, by pinfall

Ford was five-star again with that splash, but then the Mysterios decide to dump the Profits out! Rey says that’s nothing personal, just a sample of the Rumble. And then he dumps Dom out! The son’s got a lot to learn still. But will Dom & Rey look to be in that final handful at the Rumble to put their name back on the WrestleMania marquee?

 

WWE looks at the parallels of Lashley and Lesnar.

“Forge: to form by heating and hammering; to beat into shape.” Great warriors are born at the forge, shaped by the heat of the fire and tried in the brutality of combat. This is the beginning of two such warriors. “The great plains often invoke idyllic dreams of an unending cascades of crops and green pastures. But in winter, these dreams are overtaken by the harsh reality of desolation and decay. It is here that the heart of a Beast was forged, and a Conqueror was born.” Brock Lesnar is a two-time NCAA All American with over 100 victories, and the NCAA Division I Heavyweight Champion. And just five months after his WWE debut, The Next Big Thing was WWE Champion.

After ravaging every challenger in the WWE, the Beast would go to the UFC, and in just three fights, he’d reign supreme as the UFC Heavyweight Champion. Then upon returning to the WWE, Lesnar’s path of devastation continued. He took 16-time WWE Champion John Cena to Suplex City, ended The Undertaker’s WrestleMania undefeated streak, and cemented his dominance as a three-time Universal and six-time World Champion. He is a Beast without limits, without remorse, and without fear.

“Discipline. Restraint. Control. It is from these fires that the All Mighty was forged. Son of a US Army drill sergeant, Bobby Lashley learned at an early age that only by rigorously harnessing his natural ability that he would the greatness that he sought.” A three-time NAIA wrestling champion, Lashley would follow his father’s footsteps into the Army, and he honed his craft onto his way to winning gold in the Armed Forces Championship. Lashley would emerge in WWE as a peak physical specimen, unleashing a torrent of physical power and ferocity. But while he won gold, Lashley couldn’t quite find that next level.

A sojourn into MMA ignited the fires and Lashley had a 15-2 record. Then he’d return to the WWE and he would unleash havoc on opponent after opponent with his arsenal of high impact moves, headlined by the Hurt Lock full nelson. He would become United States Champion, Intercontinental Champion, and ultimately, WWE World Champion. Now, Lashley is ready for the one challenge that eluded him. For 20 years, Lashley believes Lesnar was ducking him. But Lesnar is confident that if they’d met before, Lesnar would’ve already beaten him. But the Royal Rumble will see the champion Beast collide with an All Mighty challenger.

These paths have finally crossed. Two warriors, forged in flame, battle and gold, fight for the ultimate prize. Only one emerges THE WWE World Champion. Will the ring even stay standing as these wage war?

 

The Miz & Maryse are heading out.

Kevin Patrick stops them to ask about that vicious attack. Miz says it took ONE SHOT to take down the Glamazon! Now Beth needs medical attention! Now the Grit Couple is the SH- Maryse stops Miz there. The girls are watching at home. Oh, right. Daddy loves ya, girls! And Miz loves Mommy. He is the best husband ever, because he remembered that Maryse’s birthday is next week! So before saying bonny nut- No, no, it’s bonne nuit. The T is silent. Right, bonne nuit to the Grit Couple, Miz is going to throw the most expensive, extravagant and amazing birthday party that anyone has ever seen, because Miz loves Maryse.

Nothing, especially not Edge & Beth, is stronger than their love. These two make-out right in front of us… But will announcing the birthday party here come back to bite the It Couple?

 

Alexa Bliss has another therapy session.

She and her therapist sit quietly a moment before he welcomes her back. He’s happy to say that there are less breakable things here in the office. She isn’t sure about that. But these sessions will continue. He will not tolerate a repeat of last week, though. He does apologize for showing her such a sensitive subject, but he had to know where she stood psychological. He promises her that she will be on the road to recovery. Neat. Now, let’s do word association. Okay, sure. How does she feel about the word, “Trust.” “Lily.” Friend? Lily. Home? Lily. Doll… Lily. Imaginary. Alexa gets up out of her seat and glares at him. Okay, time’s up.

The doc bolts but Alexa cools off. She sits back down, looks around the room, but stays quiet. Will Alexa ever get over her twistedly tragic past?

 

Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Seth Rollins!

The Rocky Mountain Machine is ready to wreck everything, including Brock Lesnar. Meanwhile, The Visionary is preparing to repeat history and defeat Roman Reigns once again. But who will have some major momentum on their side going towards those titanic title matches? The main event of top championship challengers begins after the break!

Raw returns and Rollins makes his entrance. The bell rings and Lashley glares while Rollins smirks. The two circle, fans rally up, and the two tie up. Rollins headlocks, Lashley powers up to power out, but Rollins duck sand dodges. Lashley hurdles then runs Rollins over! Fans cheer as Lashley mocks Rollins’ pose. The two reset, circle and tie up again. Rollins waistlocks, Lashley uses ropes to buck Rollins away, but Rollins hurdles and drops to then go perpendicular, SLINGBLADE! Rollins kicks, reels Lashley in, but Lashley back drops free! Lashley stalks Rollins, but Rollins fights the full nelson! Rollins drops to KICK Lashley, then he dumps Lashley out!

Rollins builds speed to DIVE! Direct hit but Lashley stays up! Rollins goes back in, builds speed again, DIVES, but into a clinch! OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Lashley roars and Rollins flounders while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Rollins has Lashley down now! Rollins drags Lashley to a corner to SLAM a leg against the post! Rollins SLAMS the leg again, talks trash to MVP, then gets in as the ring count reaches 5 of 10. Rollins drags Lashley up, puts the bad leg in the ropes, pulls until the ref counts, then dropkicks the leg! Lashley falls, Rollins drags him to center and steps through to drop a leg on the knee! Lashley snarls and fans rally up. MVP coaches Lashley, but Rollins drops another leg on the bad knee! And then another! Rollins has the toehold, ties up the legs, but Lashley fights, only for Rollins to still get the Indian Deathlock!

Rollins keeps Lashley’s hands away while Lashley endures the hold. Rollins SLAPS Lashley in the side, but Lashley pulls hair! The ref reprimands, Lashley lets go but he punches Rollins! Rollins lets the legs free, but then he gets the bad one for a DRAGON SCREW! And into a HALF CRAB! Lashley endures, even as Rollins sits deep! Lashley powers up, fans rally up, and Lashley turns, only for Rollins to stomp the leg! Rollins has the Half Crab again! MVP coaches Lashley more but Rollins talks trash on “Bob.” Lashley fights up, turns things over, and he boots Rollins away! Rollins falls out of the ring but he’s right back in! Lashley avoids the stomp for a COMPLETE SHOT!

MVP says that’s the All Mighty Lashley he knows! Lashley grits his teeth and pushes up, just as Rollins also sits up. Rollins turns around into an OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! And then another! Lashley runs in at the corner, to RAM into Rollins! Lashley turns Rollins around, NECKBREAKER! Lashley fires up and Tulsa fires up with him! Lashley gets Rollins up, suplexes, but Rollins fights free! Lashley kicks low to gut wrench, DOMINATOR! Cover, TWO!! Rollins survives but MVP coaches Lashley to keep going. Lashley aims from a corner, Rollins rises, Lashley runs in, into a KNEE! Rollins hits a ROLLING ELBOW! Then runs, but into a scoop!

Rollins slips out, shoves Lashley into buckles, then kicks low! Rollins underhooks the arms, PEDIGREE!! Cover, TWO!?! Lashley survives but Rollins is too tired to be shocked! Fans rally behind Lashley but Rollins stands. Rollins goes to a corner, climbs up top, but Lashley gets him with a choke grip! Lashley climbs up, but Rollins fights with elbows! But Lashley clinches, for a SUPER BELLY2BELLY!! Rollins goes flying to the other side of the ring! Lashley gets back to a corner but the Hurt Business go after him!!

Winner: Bobby Lashley, by disqualification

Cedric Alexander & Shelton Benjamin mug Lashley but Lashley fights back! That’s still 2v1, and they POST him! Alexander & Benjamin shout that he’s brought this upon himself, and then the POST Lashley again! They glare at MVP but then drag Lashley back up. But Lashley DOUBLE SUPLEXES them instead! COMPLETE SHOT for Benjamin! Fireman’s carry and the POST for Alexander! Lashley SPEARS Benjamin through barriers! Rollins is shocked at seeing the carnage, but the USOS run out from the crowd! Rollins turns around, into DOUBLE SUPERKICKS! Jimmy & Jey make up for missing the target on SmackDown!

Rollins lost the match and then got got! Will he stand a chance of dethroning the Head of the Table if the Usos can get him on his show? As for Lashley, will he be able to go for the gold if he has his former henchmen coming after him?


My Thoughts:

This was a decent episode, but with really glaring low points. Does Vince just hate Women’s Wrestling again? Why is it that the matches tonight were basically filler to move the story along? Nikki VS Rhea being No Contest was whatever since it at least went with story. But that opening tag match had Becky, Piper, Bianca and Liv, all of which are basically the stars of the Raw Women’s Division. Yet Vince couldn’t be bothered to give that match more than a bathroom break amount of time! I suppose because it was Piper ending it all very quickly, we’re supposed to think Piper is that great, but honestly it just hurt all four women. If Bianca was taken out by just a corner splash, how is she to win the Rumble?

Finn VS Theory 2 was also way too short. I get there was a commercial break in the middle but that just makes it worse. Theory winning was clean also a shame, and not because of Vince’s weird threat to him. I get that Theory needed to win to make a feud out of this, but why not dirty it up a little? When is Finn going to get a chance to comment on how Theory is Vince’s pet project and all that? This whole thing is just hurting my brain. And only a little less than the Veer Mahaan videos coming back. He better show up in the Rumble. And this week’s Alexa therapy session was filler. It was just her associating everything with Lily but not even in a more compelling way than last week’s “triggered Alexa” vignette.

We got a good 8 Man Tag but it was also on the short side. It was pretty standard Rumble season stuff for Rey & Dom to dump the Profits out, but Rey dumping Dom was a bit of a surprise. Maybe Dom will do the same during the Rumble on Rey? I did appreciate them weaving three backstage segments into one, going from Reggie wanting advice from Edge but basically striking out, and then Edge talking with Priest and then Priest talking with Kevin. If Dana still has the 24/7 title come the Women’s Rumble, can that title end up hot potato’d around to end up on someone from SmackDown? Or does Fox just hate that title?

Omos of course destroyed Reggie, but I almost thought he was going to somehow end up 24/7 champion. That’d probably put the end to the title, though, because who would even try to take it from him? Kevin had a very good match with Priest, and his win definitely puts him in line for the US Championship, but who knows if Kevin will even go for it with him so closely connected to Rollins in their stories. And we got a good promo segment out of Maryse and Beth. But Maryse bringing up the Diva Era short matches and yet we got a short women’s match here, the irony clearly goes over Vince’s thick head. That brick in the purse, though. And telegraphing the birthday stuff for next week, Maryse’s cake is definitely going into someone’s face.

The Alpha Academy graduation was a pretty good segment. I am sure Riddle was referencing something but I can’t place it. I can’t believe they’re kayfabing that Otis never had the last name “Dozovic.” That’s taking Vince’s love of editing names to a new, dumber level. But I loved the face Otis made when Gable said they were going to have a tag team academic challenge. He’s going to end up the weak link for his team since this graduation was based on his in-ring skills. The Lesnar Lashley vignette was well made, but a rather melodramatic theme in the narration. After the string of short matches, it just felt like WWE trying too hard to be cinematic and not enough about action.

Lashley VS Rollins was great stuff, until the Hurt Business “ruined” things. It just keeps reminding us of how flippant they’ve been with that faction’s story. They work together against Goldberg but then not together against Lesnar, and now the Hurt Business is just being thrown at Lashley in an attempt to build Lashley as brutal and dominant without it being in the matches. The Usos getting the drop on Rollins was pretty good, though, since that carries over from SmackDown. If they’d let it just be the Usos trying to mess with Rollins, I think things would’ve felt a bit better.

My Score: 8/10


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (1/17/22)

Raleigh gets Elevated!

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AEW Elevation Coverage

A lucky seven for Elevation!

AEW continues in Raleigh and has a strong seven for Elevation! Jay Lethal is keeping himself sharp for what could be an FTW Championship showdown!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Matt Sydal & Lee Moriarty VS JR Miller & Marcus Kross; Sydal & Moriarty wins.
  • Tay Conti VS Ameera; Conti wins.
  • Gunn Club VS JB Cole & T.I.M; Gunn Club wins.
  • Frankie Kazarian VS Labron Kozone; Kaz wins.
  • Ruby Soho VS Kenzie Page; Soho wins.
  • Private Party VS Chase Emory & Patrick Scott; Private Party wins.
  • Jay Lethal VS Alexander Moss; Lethal wins.

QUICK NOTES

Pretty clear cut stuff here, but I like that we’re seeing Sydal & Moriarty in tag action again. Kenzie Page is back in AEW and she’ll give Ruby Soho a good match. Good to see Kaz back in action, they kinda let the ball drop on his Elite Hunter story but maybe he can build himself up towards the TNT Championship. And I have a feeling in Gunn Club’s match, fans will troll Austin & Colten as “Ass Boys” again and that could come close to costing them.


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