Sam Gradwell wants to shut up the Heritage Cup Champion!
It may be Thanksgiving in the US, but it’s just another Thursday in the UK! And it’s a battle of big mouths between Noam Dar and Sam Gradwell!
- Jordan Devlin VS Mark Andrews; Devlin wins.
- Isla Dawn VS Aleah James; Dawn wins.
Dani LunaJinny VS Angel Hayze; Jinny wins.
- NXT UK Heritage Cup Championship: Noam Dar w/ Sha Samuels VS Sam Gradwell; Dar wins and retains the cup.
PLAY BY PLAY
Jordan Devlin VS Mark Andrews!
The Irish Ace says to only care about yourself in order to get ahead. But the high-fiving, stage-diving, skateboarding rockstar of Subculture does things his way. Will Andrews win his way, too? Or will Devlin get ahead at Andrews’ expense?
But Andrews is stressing out backstage? Flash Morgan Webster hurries over, they don’t know where Dani Luna went. But they can’t worry about that now, Andrews has his match. The two head out without her, will Subculture be alright?
The bell rings and the fans rally up as the two circle. They tie up, Devlin waistlocks, slams Andrews down, then slaps him around! Andrews gets to ropes and Devlin gloats. Devlin and Andrews circle and tie up again, Devlin knees low and clubs Andrews down. Devlin pushes Andrews. “You worried about your little friend?” Devlin SLAPS Andrews and tells him to be worried about who he’s in the ring with! Andrews blocks a punch to give forearms and CHOPS on repeat! Andrews whips, Devlin reverses but Andrews ducks and slides to tilt-0-whirl headscissor! And dropkick! Devlin whips but Andrews reverses to hurdle and monkey flip!
Andrews CHOPS Devlin, and Devlin staggers! Devlin turns around into a RANA! Cover, TWO! Devlin bails out, Andrews gives chase. They go into the ring, Devlin gets to the apron to then trip Andrews and slingshot splash! Fans rally up but Devlin CLUBS and CHOPS Andrews in the corner. Andrews CHOPS back, throws forearms and CHOPS again, then headlocks. Devlin powers out, hurdles, drops and kitchen sink knees Andrews down! Devlin scowls, drags Andrews up to JAM an elbow into his forehead! Devlin kicks Andrews to ropes, drags him back up and wrenches to a back suplex BACKBREAKER! Devlin asks, “Who’s the man?” and fans say, “Not you!”
Devlin stomps Andrews down, digs his heel into Andrews’ back, then drags him back up to whip to a corner. Andrews staggers into a scoop and BACKBREAKER! Devlin scrapes his boot on Andrews’ face, then stomps him in the corner. Devlin digs his boot in, the ref counts and Devlin lets off. Devlin says he knows the rules, then throws a haymaker. Andrews forearms and CHOPS back! Devlin BOOTS then LARIATS Andrews down! Cover, TWO! Another try, TWO! Devlin argues the count, but brings Andrews up to snapmare and drop an elbow. Devlin drags Andrews into a chinlock and digs a knee into his back.
Fans rally as Andrews fights up and hits a JAWBREAKER! Devlin whips, scoops, but Andrews tilt-o-whirls through to DDT! Both men are down, fans rally up and Andrews crawls then stands. Andrews counter punches again, then fires off more forearms and CHOPS! Andrews whips, Devlin reverses but Andrews slides and PELES! Andrews keeps moving, victory roll to STOMP-182! Fans fire up with Andrews and he runs in at the corner to forearm smash! Andrews keeps moving, catches Devlin for a SIT-OUT POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO! Devlin gets himself to a corner again, but Andrews is on him. Devlin shoves Andrews away, goes up but Andrews GAMANGIRIS!
Andrews climbs up and sits Devlin up but Devlin slips out! Andrews elbows Devlin away, pops Devlin to the apron, but Devlin slingshots in to CUTTER! Cover, TWO! Andrews crawls while Devlin grows frustrated. Fans chant, “Devlin Sucks!” but Devlin bumps Andrews off buckles. Devlin CHOPS, hoists Andrews up top, throws haymakers, then climbs up top. Devlin brings Andrews up but Andrews fights with body shots! Andrews clubs Devlin again and again, adjusts, and SUPER POISON-RANAS!! And then hops on, DESTROYER!! Cover, TWO!?! Devlin survives but Andrews hurries up top! FALL TO PIECES onto knees! Cover, TWO!!
Devlin gets Andrews up, suplex, STUN-DOG MILLIONAIRE! Devlin is down and Andrews hurries back up! But Devlin manages to roll out of the ring. Andrews adjusts to ARIHARA MOONSAULT! Fans fire up for “NXT! NXT!” while both men are down. A ring count starts and climbs to 5 of 10. Andrews is up but Devlin pulls him back and RAMS him into barriers! Devlin is in at 8, Andrews is in at 9.5! Andrews staggers into a HEADBUTT! Devlin has the arm, ripcord, DEVLINSIDE! Cover, Devlin wins!
Winner: Jordan Devlin, by pinfall
The Irish Ace only cares about himself and he won here tonight! Those things aren’t necessarily connected, but if it works for Devlin, will he continue to fight only for himself in NXT UK?
Sid Scala has an announcement.
He is pleased to confirmed that the #1 contenders to the NXT UK Tag Team Championships, Moustache Mountain, will have their title match in two weeks. Get ready for Pretty Deadly VS Tyler Bate & Trent Seven, round 2!
NXT UK hears from Gallus.
Joe Coffey punches a locker and Mark calms him down. Wolfgang says he’s sick and tired of the “cobble gangsters.” Joe asks, “How did we not see this coming?” Mark says it’s cuz “on what planet does Charlie Dempsey fit in with Teoman and Rohan Raja?” Well congratulations, they pulled one over on Gallus. No, don’t congratulate that. If they wanted a fight, the three of them have been right here. Joe says there’s even numbers now, and there’s nothing they love than a square go. Dempsey, if you want to run with that crew, that’s fine. If you want to have weird, candlelit family dinners, that’s fine. But you got your one cheap shot. Now, you get your heads kicked in.
NXT UK Media hears a lot of noise.
They find it’s coming from Room 1414, and then Sam Gradwell comes storming in from his room. Gradwell bangs on the door, it’s 3 in the morning!! Of course it is Noam Dar and Sha Samuels partying. How did they get a penthouse? Duh, they’re winners! Gradwell says when Dar is ready to come back to work, he’ll knock the party out of him! What? Gradwell wants a match with Dar? You bleeding know he does! Well that’s easy money for Dar and they can get back to the party. Gradwell snatches their champagne and says Dar has a date with oblivion. Just keep it down! Hey, does the camera crew wanna party? Just leave the camera outside, yeah?
Sid Scala has another announcement.
But it’s interrupted by Sam Gradwell barging in. He’s been looking with Sid all over. Why is the match with Dar not a Heritage Cup match? Dar’s been celebrating nonstop, it’s ridiculous! But then Sha and Dar walk in and accuse Gradwell of scheming. Win matches, Gradwell! That’s the rules! But then Johnny Saint walks over! The NXT UK GM says they do what Sid says. Then the main event is now for the NXT UK Heritage Cup! Gradwell says that makes sense and the party is over! Dar welcomes Mr. Saint back, but Sha assures us that is sarcasm. Will Dar and Sha be feeling any better after the showdown with the Thunderstorm?
Isla Dawn VS Aleah James!
The Wicked Witch has been taking trophies from every woman in the division, and her opponent this week was her most recent victim. But will Aleah make Isla take an L to keep her new winstreak going?
The bell rings and fans rally as the two circle. They tie up, Isla powers Aleah to a corner and then pie faces her as she lets off. Aleah comes back, ties up, but Isla wrenches an arm to a wristlock. Aleah endures, cartwheels and wrenches to YANK Isla’s arm! Isla turns through, Aleah wrenches back. Isla throws a body shot, wrenches Aleah, fans rally and duel as Isla hammerlocks. Aleah flips, powers through and headlocks! Isla throws body shots, powers out but Aleah goes up, only to turn around into a snapmare! Aleah gets up but Isla runs her over! Things speed up, Aleah hurdles and dropkicks Isla down! Isla goes to the apron, Aleah grabs her hair but Isla hotshots Aleah away!
Isla grins as she gets in and stomps Aleah down. Isla stomps Aleah to the corner, pushes her against ropes then whips her to kitchen sink knee! Isla rains down forearms, runs, then PENALTY KICKS! Cover, TWO! Aleah elbows Isla from the mat but Isla CLUBS her down. Isla digs her boots into Aleah in the corner then lets off as the ref counts. Isla whips Aleah out then right back into the corner to clothesline! Isla whips Aleah in again but Aleah goes up and over and schoolgirl with bridge! TWO, and Isla sweeps the legs! Isla digs claws into Aleah’s shoulders, then grabs the arms for a cobra clutch!
Aleah endures, fights, then JAWBREAKERS! Aleah dodges a forearm to rally with big shoulder tackles, and a CROSSBODY! Cover, TWO! Aleah reels Isla in, Isla throws body shots and suplexes, but Aleah makes it a cradle! TWO, and Aleah hurries up. Aleah run sin but is put in the corner for a ROUNDHOUSE! Isla fireman’s carries for a SWINGING SIDEWALK SLAM! Cover, Isla wins!
Winner: Isla Dawn, by pinfall
Aleah’s winstreak is cut very short, and Isla snaps her own losing streak! Are fortunes changing for the Wicked Witch? Wait, she goes to her mysterious box full of her treasures. She takes a peek inside, and returns the scrunchie she stole from Aleah? Has Isla gotten something even better now that she’s won?
Xia Brookside visits Sid Scala’s office.
She wants the update on the title match. Sid didn’t make a promise but she says he did. And daddy said he was gonna talk to Sid about it, since it seems Sid doesn’t want her on the wall “with all the nice, shiny champions.” Just because Sid doesn’t want her as champion doesn’t mean she shouldn’t get her shot! Sid stops her there and says congratulations, she gets her opportunity next week. No! That’s too soon! She needs more time to prepare and train for Meiko! It’s that or not at all! FINE! Xia storms out, but will her spoiled attitude be what dooms her against the Final Boss?
Moustache Mountain is excited!
Trent Seven and Tyler Bate hug it out. They’re refocused, they’ve found their Zen, they’re ready to take the tag titles. Finally! They cannot lose this one. They will not lose this one! They’re Moustache Mountain, and they owe it to themselves and the fans! Pretty Deadly, that’s it! You’ve got two weeks until Seven & Bate become NXT UK Tag Team Champions!
Pretty Deadly responds.
Sam Stoker asks Lewis Howley, what would be sweeter than beating Moustache Mountain once? Beating them twice! But this time, the NXT UK Universe will be live and in person to see with their own eyes that Pretty Deadly is the best tag team in NXT UK history. But will that be the case when the rematch happens in two weeks?
Dani Luna VS Angel Hayze!
Subculture’s Punk Rock Powerhouse was MIA earlier, has she appeared since the start of the show? It doesn’t seem that’s the case, and out walks Jinny. “Well, well, well. Dani Luna isn’t coming, and I’ve made sure of that.” Her sincerest apologies to Mark & Flash. They’ll have to be without her for a very long time. Jinny is handling things on her own from now on, and her business relationship with Joseph Conners is over. Fans actually cheer that news. Jinny goes into the ring and says tonight, she’ll get her winning streak back on track, starting with the “little girl,” Angel Hayze.
Jinny VS Angel Hayze!
The bell rings, the change is official and the two tie up. Jinny wrenches, puts the arm on the ropes and knees away on Angel! The ref counts, Jinny throws forearms then snapmares Angel to stomp her down. Jinny stalks and stomps Angel more, then drags her up. Angel throws body shots, Jinny ROCKS her with a forearm then whips to CLOBBER Angel with an elbow! Fans boo but Jinny KNEES Angel down! And again! And again! Jinny throws more knees, then lets off to wrap on a chinlock. Jinny thrashes Angel but fans rally as Angel endures. Jinny puts as much weight and pressure as she can on the hold but Angel still fights up!
Angel moves around, throws body shots but Jinny KNEES her low! Angel spins Jinny around to fire off forearms and a sobat! But Jinny kicks a leg out! Jinny drags Angel up to short arm LARIAT! Fans rally for Angel but Jinny drags her up by her hair. Jinny ROCKS Angel with a right, then puts her in a corner. Jinny puts Angel in the ropes, SLAPS her, and SLAPS her and SLAPS her, before the MAKEOVER! Cover, Jinny wins!
Winner: Jinny, by pinfall
The Fierce Fashionista lived up to that nickname, and she gets a win after a long drought. Will she fight her way back to the title all by herself?
The Nina Samuels Show returns.
Nina welcomes us back, and has an exclusive with the champion, Meiko Satomura. What can she tell us about her secret techniques for her upcoming title match? Meiko stays quiet and Emilia McKenzie asks Nina leave them alone while they train. Okay… There you have it! That’s the Nina Samuels Show. Meiko’s stare scares Nina off, will Meiko even need any tricks for taking on Xia Brookside next week?
Dar and Sha talk backstage.
Dar says it’s time to make some changes to the Heritage Cup. Tyler Bate? More like, see you later, mate! They cover Tyler’s name up with tape! They also cover up A-Kid! Or as Sha calls him, “A-Mug.” Now Dar’s name is the only one visible. Dar’s feeling spicy for the match, but will Gradwell bring the party to a screeching halt and add a new name to that cup?
Ilja Dragunov speaks.
Rampage Brown made it very clear that he doesn’t need Dragunov’s respect. That’s okay. Because just by standing in front of Ilja, looking him in the eye and punching him to the ground, that was the best showing of respect he could give. Dragunov first fought for the title for himself, but then he realized the responsibility he has as a symbol. People feel something watching him fight. He is a symbol of dedication and the will to fight like there is no tomorrow. Long Live the Czar.
Rampage Brown responds.
He doesn’t like the light being in his face. Are they going to ask him about his feelings for this match or something? Who cares, really? Ilja is the golden boy and that doesn’t sit right with Rampage. Neither does Ilja being NXT UK Champion. Rampage came in the most respected competitor NXT UK had ever signed, but at the end of the day, it doesn’t do anything. It doesn’t pay the bills and it doesn’t feed him. Being champion does. There is no respect when it comes to the title. Ilja is just in Rampage’s way. Rampage Brown don’t mess around. “Ilja, I’m gonna smash ya face in, then I’m gonna take ya title. Then I’ll have all the respect.”
NXT UK Media catches up with Mark Andrews.
He lost the match but he’s outside the medic’s room, not for him but for Flash. Flash has an update on his shoulder. But before he can say what’s what, Kenny Williams walks by. Andrews and Flash outside the medic’s room, they should start calling it Subculture’s dressing room. Andrews tells Kenny not to pick with a fight with someone on the sidelines. Plus, Andrews is healthy. Alright, alright. Relax, Mark. You don’t want to get into a fight back here with someone like Kenny. Andrews steps to Kenny and Kenny scurries away, will Andrews look to crush the cockroach in the ring?
NXT UK Heritage Cup Championship: Noam Dar w/ Sha Samuels VS Sam Gradwell!
The Scottish Supernova didn’t want to defend his cup, but he’ll gladly take the bump up in the paycheck! Will Dar be able to do even more with the “easy money” he’s earning? Or will the Thunderstorm ruin those plans for the after party?
The introductions are made, the cup is presented, and ready or not, here we go, yogurts!
The two circle and Dar gives a quick kick. Gradwell stays up, and Dar backs off to get a sip from Sha’s flask. Dar and Gradwell circle and tie up. Gradwell powers Dar to ropes, Dar calls for the ropebreak and the ref counts. Gradwell lets off but Dar avoids his clothesline. Dar taunts Gradwell then uses the ropes as defense. Gradwell backs off, he and Dar circle again. They tie up, Dar waistlocks, then baits Gradwell with a foot to then get a headlock. Gradwell blocks the takeover and powers out, but Dar pulls hair to bring Gradwell into a headlock takeover. Gradwell headscissors, Dar fights those off and gets up, but Gradwell sends him to a corner.
Dar goes up and under, Gradwell runs into an arm wrench! Dar wrenches and wrenches but Gradwell DECKS Dar! Gradwell drags Dar up, reels him in to scoop and SLAM! Gradwell drags Dar up, Dar wrenches and pulls on an ear! Gradwell just laughs it off, and pulls on Dar’s ear! We’re under a minute here in the first, Gradwell CLUBS Dar down! Cover, TWO! Gradwell drags Dar up, Dar gets the leg, but Gradwell throws haymakers, then SMACKS Dar off Gradwell’s knee brace! Gradwell fireman’s carries for the SAMOAN DRIVER! Cover, Gradwell gets the fall!!
Dar: 0; Gradwell: 1
Sha protests, that knee brace should be illegal! Dar is out! Sha drags Dar back to the corner and revives him. Gradwell refreshes and the second round begins! Dar flops down, Gradwell drags Dar up, but Dar cradles! TWO!! Gradwell gets up, Dar jumps on for a GUILLOTINE! Gradwell tosses him and CLOBBERS him! Gradwell whips corner to corner then back drops Dar high and hard! Dar flounders, Gradwell aims to ROLLING ELBOW! But Dar goes flying out of the ring! Gradwell goes to the apron, Sha distracts him, Dar sweeps the legs! Sha laughs at Gradwell, Dar builds speed to BLAST Gradwell with a dropkick!
Dar drags Gradwell up and into the ring as fans cheer him on. Dar gets in to back elbow hard! Dar then aims from a corner, runs in, NOVA ROLLA! Cover, Dar gets the fall!
Dar: 1; Gradwell: 1
And we’re tied up just like that! Dar is feeling a bit better after now, but the third round begins. Gradwell and Dar tie up, Dar goes for a leg but Gradwell throws him off. Dar kicks the leg out! Gradwell blocks the whip, sends Dar to a corner but Dar dropkicks him back! Dar dropkicks the leg out! Gradwell clutches his knee, Dar basement dropkicks! Cover, TWO! Dar stomps Gradwell, kicks him to the ropes, then wrenches an arm. Gradwell fights up but Dar kicks him. Dar still works on the arm, Gradwell powers up again but Dar knees him low. Gradwell knees Dar back! Dar KICKS the leg, feints to KICK and KICK Gradwell down! Cover, TWO!
Fans taunt Gradwell with “You’re Not Sheamus!” but Gradwell ROCKS Dar! Dar staggers over but Gradwell ROCKS him again! Dar goes for the leg, Gradwell underhooks for a BUTTERFLY SUPLEX! Both men are down as we reach a minute left in the third. Sha coaches Dar, fans rally up, Dar kicks but Gradwell blocks! Dar elbow jabs free! Dar then facelocks, but Gradwell guillotines out, only for Dar to drag him down! Dar has to kick Gradwell down, but he has the kneebar! Wait, he’s undoing the knee brace! Gradwell claws at Dar as Dar stomps him down! CHAMPAGNE SUPER KNEEBAR! We reach the last 10 seconds of the round, Gradwell CLUBS away on Dar! Dar pulls harder, but time’s up!
Dar: 1; Gradwell: 1
Gradwell survives to be saved by the bell, but Sha gets Dar back to his corner. Dar is ready to go after the leg while Gradwell takes his brace off. The bell rings and Dar runs in to CLOBBER Gradwell! Dar shoves Gradwell and BOOTS him at the ropes! Dar KICKS the bad leg, then KICKS Gradwell down. Dar stomps Gradwell, the ref counts, Dar lets off. Sha SLAMS Gradwell’s bad leg on the apron edge! Fans are torn but Dar CLOBBERS Gradwell from behind! Cover, TWO! Gradwell is still in this and Dar can’t believe it! Dar kicks the leg, grabs it, but Gradwell boots him away! Gradwell hobbles up and blocks the back elbow to spin Dar for an STO! Cover, TWO!!
Fans are fired up and Sha is relieved. Sha begs Dar to get up but Gradwell is on him. Gradwell fireman’s carries but Dar CLUBS away. Gradwell shoves Dar, KNEES him low, underhooks but Dar slips out! Gradwell avoids the sweep but not the mule kicks! Fans fire up as Dar KICKS. Gradwell stands up? Dar KICKS the leg, but then Gradwell blocks the chest kick! Gradwell ROCKS Dar as we reach a minute, but Dar dodges the rolling elbow to KICK Gradwell in the back! Gradwell falls, Sha sets the leg up for Dar! The ref is suspicious, but Gradwell gets up to grab Dar from the top! Fireman’s carry but Dar holds ropes! Sha uses his scarf as a lifeline for Dar!
Dar holds on, then lets go to use the momentum to roll Gradwell up! TWO!! Gradwell escapes but Dar sweeps the legs! Twenty seconds, Dar runs in to fake Gradwell out! Takedown to CHAMPAGNE SUPER KNEEBAR!! Gradwell just has to last 10 seconds! But he can’t! Gradwell taps, Dar wins!!
Winner: Noam Dar, by submission (still NXT UK Heritage Cup Champion)
Dar makes “easy money” because of the East End Butcher insurance policy! Will Mr. Supernova 11 keep on winning and keep on partying?
A really good episode here, what a great adjustment to make the main event big. Gradwell gets a bit of satisfaction in making Dar defend the cup when he didn’t want to, but I figured he was going to lose. Dar has been going pretty hot lately, and though he’s a Heel, he’s got a great following from the fans. Dar covering up the other names with tape was a fairly clever move from him, too. I’m very curious as to what’s going on with Dani Luna and Joseph Conners not being around. Is this COVID concerns they’re keeping under wraps? There weren’t releases for NXT UK, I think those would’ve made the wrestling internet news.
It mostly seems a shame for Conners and Jinny that they’re not working together. He can’t seem to get anywhere, she isn’t really getting anywhere even though she won as Dani’s replacement. Not sure what’s going to be different for Jinny now that she’s solo again. As for Andrews, he lost to Devlin, and I think he’s going to lose to Kenny Williams next week. Isla Dawn winning was a bit of a surprise, as was her giving the scrunchie back to Aleah. Will she now retrace her steps and defeat those she took things from as her build to the title? Hopefully that means Dani Luna is okay to come back because she was one of them.
Xia getting her title match next week is actually a great way to give her what she wants while also giving her some comeuppance because, as she said, she can’t possibly prepare in just a week. Meiko is definitely winning, and I’m thinking Blair Davenport walks out right after that match to call her shot. We got pretty good, pretty quick promos from Moustache Mountain, Pretty Deadly, Dragunov and Rampage Brown. Both those title matches are going to be great but I feel like they’re both going to be wins for the current champions. As much as Seven wants to be a champion, that’s probably going to be why he loses.
My Score: 8.3/10
NOAH WEEKLY NEWSLETTER VOL.187 ~ 29TH SEPTEMBER 2022
Keiji Mutoh continues his Retirement tour and bringing out faces from the past! NOAH has a new champion! Interesting inter-promotional battles on the horizon as well!
Kaito Kiyomiya is the new GHC Heavyweight Champion, nominates Kazuyuki Fujita as challenger
Following provocation by Kenoh not only saying that he was going to be the one to inherit Keiji Mutoh’s Shining Wizard and the memory of Keiji Mutoh himself (and the outright claim that Kiyomiya would simply forget about Mutoh once Mutoh had retired, which Kiyomiya didn’t even bother responding to), Kenoh went one step further at their last pre match on the 19th September by pulling Keiji Mutoh’s pose, kissing his hand, putting it to Kiyomiya’s lips and then exploding it. Kiyomiya erupted in fury at this, it was far more than any verbal provocation of Kenoh’s, which I guess he has learned to ignore over the years. They fought for the GHC Heavyweight in Nagoya on September 25th, with Kiyomiya emerging victorious following a modified Shining Wizard. As Kenoh left it was like a spell was broken. Kenoh went backstage and muttered about Kiyomiya being the company favorite and in his interview the day after winning the title, Kiyomiya said nothing about Keiji Mutoh. Mutoh as we know had been a focus of both Kiyomiya and Kenoh leading up to the title match.
Back in the ring, Kiyomiya called out his next opponent. Kazuyuki Fujita. Fujita came to the ring, carrying a can of beer which he swigged from. Getting in the ring he circled Kiyomiya and took off his t-shirt. Kiyomiya said that he was expecting a fight, but Fujita did something that no other NOAH wrestler had (or perhaps would) do, and that was to throw himself at Kiyomiya and then make nuzzling motions against his head, while he licked the belt. Kiyomiya pushed him off, and Fujita retaliated by pouring beer over his head.
Kiyomiya screaming that he hated beer was met with Fujita toasting him from the ramp and yelling “Kampaiii” (“cheers”) after a fight had broken out, and Kiyomiya threw him from the ring.
Backstage, Kiyomiya said his reason for nominating Kazuyuki Fujita as his challenger was that he had never been defeated for the GHC Heavyweight. Fujita had to give up the belt due to Coronavirus. It has been a recurring theme of most of the GHC Heavyweight champions since Go Shiozaki, that Fujita has been the man to beat in order to cement yourself as champion. Kiyomiya was picking up that torch.
As for Fujita, he played it as if he was a Casanova and had been asked out on a date by warning Kiyomiya that when you experience Fujita, you can never go back because you were never going to be the same. He was going to “make it a night to remember”. He sipped his beer, and licked his lips afterwards.
Title match has been set for NOAH’s return to Ariake on the 30th October.
STINGER lose, NOAH Junior Regulars win, enter Tadasuke (with a chair)
Following a period of brutal attacks on Seiki Yoshioka (by the end of the match he could hardly use one side of his body) and a title challenge where Atsushi Kotoge was bloodied up, The NOAH Junior Regulars emerged victorious and bought the tag titles home to their unit. They had very little time to celebrate their win and put ice on their wounds, when Tadasuke burst in and attacked Atsushi Kotoge with a chair while Hi69 beat up on the already incapacitated Seiki Yoshioka. Tadasuke (wild grin on his face) got on the microphone and made a challenge for the tag titles. Then Tadasuke wiped the blood from Kotoge that had got on his hands on his hair, leaving red streaks in the peroxide. Tadasuke was even waving the bloodied seat of the chair, which had detached during the attack, around backstage.
Title match will be on the 30th October when NOAH return to the Ariake complex.
Takashi Sugiura and Satoshi Kojima, NOAH’s most dysfunctional tag team, win the GHC Heavyweight tag titles
It must be said that with the combined efforts of Satoshi Kojima and Hideki Suzuki, we almost have our Sugi back.
At the press conference/title match signing, Sugi and Kojima appeared dressed in suits and wearing dark glasses. They looked something between The Men In Black and “Dangerous Detectives” (as Tokyo Sports called them which stems from a Japanese TV show). Hideki Suzuki was on form, not only mistranslating Timothy Thatcher and stating at one point that Thatcher said he came to Japan to “beat you up” and being rude to a journalist for being overfamiliar with his “punk mouth”, the highlight of the press conference was his long close up stare at Sugi, who was trying not to laugh.
The dysfunctional team won the titles in Nagoya on the 25th September, and despite their falling out during the match, Sugi actually gave Kojima a proper handshake. Then they went back to squabbling backstage over Kojima talking on the mic when it was Sugi who got the win. No challengers have come forward as of yet.
HAYATA retains the GHC Junior, Ninja Mack makes his long awaited challenge
It had been an emotional match for YO-HEY, and for fans. Cutting out the aerial techniques that had characterized their earlier matches, both he and HAYATA demonstrated how much they had both evolved by concentrating on a more NOAH based ground attack with submissions. YO-HEY might have failed in the challenge, but he had at least gotten one win over HAYATA in the pre-match. He knew the title match would be different and he would need to level up, and afterwards he reflected and said he would start from rock bottom in order to make his next challenge. What fans had noticed that while things had changed between them, some things were the same, such as YO-HEY coloring his hair, his tongue (and even his boxer shorts) purple, which is HAYATA’s color, and HAYATA not speaking as much as he has done in previous title challenges, as he is content to let YO-HEY talk. After the match, Ninja Mack came to challenge. HAYATA accepted by saying, that he was “finally interested in the belt” and acknowledging him as challenger. Title match will of course be on the 30th October. But HAYATA is not immediately going into a fallout match with Ninja Mack at NOAH’s next event on the 30th, but is having a tag match against YO-HEY.
Keiji Mutoh’s Retirement Road
Keiji Mutoh has been very busy.
– 23rd September: Great Muta appears in AEW
The Great Muta made a surprise appearance in AEW to rescue Sting, who had been tied to a chair by Darby Allen. Muta came to the ring, advanced on Sting and then turned and spat green mist into the face of Allen and then reunited with Sting. Keiji Mutoh announced that Sting would attend Muta’s retirement on the 22nd in Yokohama, but has not said in what capacity, although it is assumed that they will tag. Regarding any further appearances in America, Mutoh said he didn’t think it was likely, but did warn that The Great Muta may pop up somewhere as you never knew where he would turn up next.
– 25th September: Keiji Mutoh Retirement Road: Love Forever 2
Keiji Mutoh teamed with his junior Kazuyuki Fujita to take on Mutoh’s classmate, Masakatsu Funaki and Katsuhiko Nakajima, who Mutoh has known since he was a boy, and still calls affectionately “Katsuhiko”. Nakajima said he was going to break up this class reunion, and while Mutoh did get kicked (Nakajima smirked and said it was fun when Mutoh later complained his leg still hurt) but it was Fujita who got the worst of it. During the match, Nakajima pulled out Mutoh’s Space Rolling Elbow. Mutoh was initially not pleased, but then he became very happy to see it and said that he thought that “Katsuhiko” did it because he had some small measure of feeling for him. I think had Nakajima been a more acrobatic wrestler, Mutoh might have handed it to him. Mutoh won the match with The Shining Wizard, pinning Nakajima. This was Mutoh’s farewell to Nagoya, his classmate, his junior and Nakajima.
– 26th September: Hiroshi Tanahashi comes to the press conference and a tag match is announced
Hiroshi Tanahashi presented 38 roses to Mutoh when he came to the press conference. Each rose symbolizes a year of Mutoh’s career. Mutoh joked that he should have laid them at his feet, as had happened in boxing recently. Tanahashi said he wasn’t good at ad-libbing, and then introduced himself as “one of the greatest New Japan talents in the past one hundred years”. During the press conference, a tag match was announced. New Japan’s Hiroshi Tanahashi, Togi Makabe and Honma Tomoaki will team together against the team of Naomichi Marufuji, Keiji Mutoh and Keiji Mutoh. This will take place on the 30th October. Mutoh has not given up hope of appearing one final time in the New Japan ring.
– 16th October: A new match is announced
NOAH announced that due to fan demand, Keiji Mutoh will be appearing in Fukuoka. He will tag with Ninja Mack and Satoshi Kojima against Naomichi Marufuji, HAYATA and Jack Morris. Satoshi Kojima is of course connected to Mutoh through All Japan and New Japan, Naomichi Marufuji has wanted a match against Mutoh (he will be tagging with him as we know on the 30th October) and HAYATA has been a big fan of Mutoh for a while, as he has influenced a lot of his style and persona. HAYATA thinks of himself and The Great Muta as “The Phantom Team”. Muta doesn’t like to speak and HAYATA said, neither does he.
Naomichi Marufuji and Katsuhiko Nakajima head overseas
Naomichi Marufuji and Katsuhiko Nakajima will appear for Evolution Pro Wrestling in New York for their anniversary show on November 12th. Marufuji’s match is yet to be announced, but Nakajima will take on Josh Alexander. Alexander has said he wonders how Nakajima is going to kick after he snaps his ankle. They will also appear at King of Indies in San Francisco on November 19th.
NOSAWA vs Katsuhiko Nakajima (and Kenoh)
After being beaten up by Katsuhiko Nakajima who gave him some pretty stiff soccerball kicks outside the ring at Korakuen Hall recently, (although he would tell you that Nakajima tried to beat him up), NOSAWA Rongai has been on a quest to face Nakajima in a match. Then he threw in Kenoh, so it could be himself and Eita versus Kongoh. Hideki Suzuki told him that he was probably going to die, but NOSAWA has taken no notice and kept on with his demand. His demand has not been met because rather than facing Nakajima and Kenoh, NOAH have booked him against rookies Yasutaka Yano and Kai Fujimura. NOSAWA thinks he is having to go through some kind of trial.
ELSEWHERE IN NOAH
– Hideki Suzuki has hinted that perhaps Takashi Sugiura might like to get back online.
– Yoshiki Inamura and YO-HEY continued their guild, despite the fact that YO-HEY said someone attacked and burned their castle down. A picture was taken of YO-HEY and Inamura playing the game, with YO-HEY seated cross legged on Inamura, who was doing a bridge in the ring. We have seen Inamura used as a weight, but is he now used as furniture?
– NOAH’s Director, Narihiro Takeda, wrote on a NOAH Note that he would like for Darby Allin to come to NOAH one day.
– Tadasuke got a match thrown out by ripping off Alejandro’s mask. Tadasuke did not care, and did not even respond when Alejandro asked if he wanted a mask for himself?
– Daiki Inaba had his long awaited singles match with Katsuhiko Nakajima, but failed to revenge himself for Nakajima’s behavior in W-1. Nakajima even went for the cocky pin by grinning and leaning on Inaba.
– There was usual chaos at the NOAH Junior Space sessions as Daisuke Harada is not there to take control. Atsushi Kotoge seems to be the main culprit, forgetting to invite Seiki Yoshioka in and at one time even failing to press record.
– It’s probably best that Daiki Inaba, who apparently likes to be in the nip backstage, was not present when NOAH was at Differ. It was bad enough that Sugi used to wander around naked…
– Mitsuharu Misawa wrote in a diary entry for 2006 about filming an advert for THE LEAVE, and having to sing first thing in the morning while they were filming. Probably due to the fact that he had a problem with his throat anyway, was a heavy smoker and had taken “so many chops and kicks” to it in his career, he said he sounded very hoarse.
EVENT RECAPS AND POST MATCH PROMOS
SUNNY VOYAGE – September 19th
N-INNOVATION – September 21st
GRAND SHIP 2022 IN NAGOYA/KEIJI MUTOH RETIREMENT ROAD – September 25th
- GHC Heavyweight Champion: Kaito Kiyomiya
Challenger: Kazuyuki Fujita, [Muto Retirement Road] ABEMA presents Ariake Gaisen-THE RETURN-PRO-WRESTLING LOVE FOREVER . 3 ~TRIUMPH~ Sunday 30th October, Ariake Arena, Tokyo
- GHC Junior Champion: HAYATA
Challenger: Ninja Mack, [Muto Retirement Road] ABEMA presents Ariake Gaisen-THE RETURN-PRO-WRESTLING LOVE FOREVER . 3 ~TRIUMPH~ Sunday 30th October, Ariake Arena, Tokyo
- GHC Heavyweight Tag Champions: KojiSugi (Satoshi Kojima & Takashi Sugiura)
- GHC Junior Tag Champions: The NOAH Junior Regulars (Atsushi Kotoge & Seiki Yoshioka)
Challengers: Kongoh Juniors (Tadasuke & Hi69), [Muto Retirement Road] ABEMA presents Ariake Gaisen-THE RETURN-PRO-WRESTLING LOVE FOREVER . 3 ~TRIUMPH~ Sunday 30th October, Ariake Arena, Tokyo
- GHC National Champion: Masakatsu Funaki
Challenger: Masa Kitamiya, SUNNY VOYAGE 2022 – Friday September 30th (Bandaijima Multi-Purpose Square Ogama)
(This event will not be broadcast live, but hopefully this match will be shown via Instagram)
THIS WEEK IN NOAH
– Friday, October 7th
STAR NAVIGATION 2022 – Korakuen Hall, Tokyo
Time: 18:30 JST
Broadcast: WrestleUniverse/ABEMA (live)
– Saturday, October 8th
STAR NAVIGATION 2022 – Korakuen Hall, Tokyo
Time: 18:30 JST
Broadcast: WrestleUniverse (live)
Note about broadcasts
Unless you are living in Japan or have a VPN you know is compatible with ABEMA, please do not subscribe to the service. For fans living outside of Japan, a subscription to WrestleUniverse would be better as they show more NOAH shows than ABEMA, and usually the events get uploaded very quickly. ABEMA broadcasts are only in Japanese, you can only watch them live, and this is the only NOAH they show. They do not broadcast old shows as these belong to Samurai TV.
BIRTHDAYS & ANNIVERSARIES
Wednesday, 5th October: Keiji Mutoh debut anniversary (38)
Wednesday, 5th October: Seiki Yoshioka debut anniversary (14)
“Taka & Satoshi” reveal a “dangerous detective” look, mischievous Suzuki is a reckless interpreter, the GHC tag signing ceremony is thrown into chaos by bizarre question and answer between the two teams
With thanks to: Metal NOAH
GIF taken from WrestleUniverse & NOAH Official YouTube
Picture credit: YO-HEY & NOAH.co.jp
Andrew’s IMPACT Wrestling Results & Match Ratings: 9.29.2022
Bound for Glory is 8 days away, but Victory Road just happened. What kind of show do we get with some fallout and penultimate hype?
Victory Road just happened, but Bound for Glory is like 8 nights away? You know I forgot that it was such a quick turn around. That makes tonight weird, since there’s some fallout, but then there’s gonna be a lot of table setting for Bound for Glory.
This episode could be awful. The last week or so haven’t exactly set the world afire, so I’m curious if the highlight really is just gonna be the Monster’s Ball with Masha and Allie Katch.
*insert joke about possibly gagging and balls and Swinger’s Dungeon*
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) September 30, 2022
- Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey w/Juice Robinson) vs Trey Miguel & Laredo Kid: Bullet Club win via Finesse & Fold – **
- IMPACT Digital Media Championship: Brian Myers (c) vs Crazzy Steve: Myers retains via Roster Cut – ** 1/2
- Delirious vs Black Taurus: Black Taurus wins via Destination Hellhole – ** 1/4
- PCO & Vincent vs Rich Swann & Heath: Rich wins via Phoenix Splash – ** 1/4
- Pick Your Poison: Monster’s Ball Match: Masha Slamovich vs Allie Katch: Masha wins via Russian Death Device – *** 1/2
Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey w/Juice Robinson) vs Trey Miguel & Laredo Kid
I don’t think I could care less about this match if I tried. Trey and Laredo are worthless. Laredo has eaten so many terrible losses and Trey is just bad. If the BC Juniors don’t win…I will really question the booking.
My biggest takeaway early is the commentary tries to put over Trey “turning heads”. No he doesn’t, he is legitimately hard to watch and everything that Will Ospreay did wrong in his early career; is basically Trey, but with less personality. Oh did you expect play by play? They isolate Laredo, decent tandem attacks, when Trey comes in it’s bad offense typical Cruiser garbage with laughable facials and body language.
Just typical crap with Trey. Were there some cool high spots? Sure. Do I care? NOPE.
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) September 30, 2022
IMPACT Digital Media Championship: Brian Myers (c) vs Crazzy Steve
Steve starts with some of his quirky mat wrestling, Arm Wringers into Drop Toe Holds and face biting. It shocked Myers early, but he takes a small shortcut and starts trying to slow down the psycho from Decay. Steve bounces off the ropes and Myers does his sliding trip move before commercial.
Back from commercial, Snapmare from Steve and the neck twister into some corner offense of Hip Attacks and Sentons for 2. Myers dodges King Kill 33, lands a few pot shots, Implant DDT for 2. Into the corner, face bite, Upside Down, after the rope break Myers grabs the referee to block Steve. Eye Poke, Roster Cut, AND STILL…
Simple, but entertaining. Plus it continues Myers’ arrogant, full of himself for absolutely no reason persona. Oh and he offers up an Open Challenge for Bound for Glory. Maybe Bobby Fish? Someone new? Could be interesting.
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) September 30, 2022
Delirious vs Black Taurus
Delirious is between gibberish and Stone Cold early on while they’re just trading shots. Delirious twists the Nose Ring…in the mask…and Taurus sells it momentarily before stomping the foot and decking him. This is just a weird match. I mean we all know Delirious is weird, but he’s not all comedy; and Taurus is supposed to be legit-ish.
Admittedly, with the exception of Victory Road, it has been years since I’ve watched a Delirious match. So the level of ridiculousness has hit Toru Yano levels, especially after the 10 count Leg Drops. Taurus powders, comes back in, Shoulder Tackle, Blackhole Backbreaker into a Samoan Drop. As soon as Taurus looks in charge, Delirious throws together a combo, eats a Headbutt and then Destination Hellhole.
Sheesh okay after 2 interview segments we get to Honor No More’s victory celebration segment. Just a lot of talking and inaction, so this just goes to feed that weird feeling I had coming into the show because of the timing. Eddie does the usual thing where hates on PCO and accuses him of being the weak link, which is a smart story angle since the fans tend to like PCO’s gimmick and this makes him more sympathetic to casual observers.
Oh good Taven is talking now. Wait did I just say that? DAMN YOU IMPACT! Made me like Matt Taven. Maria stirs the pot a little saying that Eddie is a better wrestler than Josh and Moose…by the implications.
Thank God, Josh Alexander finally breaks up the segment with…more talking. Okay never mind. Jesus since the end of the Delirious match it was like 15 minutes before Josh finally charged the ring and threw down a bit with Honor No More. Rich Swann and Heath make a bit of the babyface save for Josh, but the numbers are still on Honor No More’s side. Oh MCMG come down in a tracksuit and dress clothes! Someone wasn’t ready to be doing a run in.
PCO & Vincent vs Rich Swann & Heath
Well isn’t that convenient that four of the men in the donnybrook were supposed to be in a match anyway.
Rich uses his quickness to try and stay ahead of PCO, but PCO cuts him off in the corner into the Corner Hung Codebreaker, then the leaned against the ropes Leg Drop thing. Vincent throws together a T-Bone Suplex into a Flatliner and keeps the vibes flowing on Rich Swann.
PCO clears out Heath, but PCO’s hand gets stuck in the ropes. Vincent eats a flip kick and the Phoenix Splash while PCO and Heath are brawling on the outside after the rope issue with PCO.
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) September 30, 2022
Pick Your Poison: Monster’s Ball Match: Masha Slamovich vs Allie Katch
Haymakers and Headbutts start things off as they both hit the ropes and lay out one another with dual clotheslines. Trash can lid duel, Masha gets first contact, but Allie blocks and returns 3 shots. German Suplex from Masha into whipping her with a chain, some choking and then general pulling with the chain in Katch’s mouth or around her eyes. Katch claws at Masha’s eyes to try and get some space.
Headbutts and Biting from Masha as Allie tries to power out of a Bow and Arrow. More chain choking…I’m not sure if this is a wrestling match or BDSM prep at the moment. Ahh Masha needs more Cowbell but Allie cuts her off with a trash can lid. Allie tries a Piledriver through a door, but Masha turns it into an Air Raid Crash into the opposite corner.
Commercial break, and Allie is getting choked again. Spots get a little redundant, slams, chokes, and blood. OHHH – it’s a “Use the Door” chant. I thought it was – nah – I won’t say what I thought it was. Chairshot from Masha misses, but a Snap Suplex from Masha onto the chair gets some usefulness. Straight Right to the gut and an Axe Kick allows Masha to hit the Death Valley Driver onto the propped up chair. Masha goes back to biting after it was only 2. Allie cuts off Masha going to the top, Superplex onto the trash can lid, into a Death Valley Driver through the door – but Masha kicks out.
Allie tries a Piledriver on the apron a few times, but Masha blocks. Masha tries for the Release German to the floor but Allie holds on. Dazed strikes, bites and then a Russian Leg Sweep through the table lays both out for a short time. Masha grabs a black bag, it’s gotta be tacks for Monster’s Ball. Masha eats a few tacks for good show, picks up Allie but Allie fights. Piledriver into the tacks from Allie, only 2. Allie opens a trash can, and empties a bunch of cut up soda cans. Hits Masha with the can, Masha fires, Spinning Heel Kick and then Russian Death Device into the pile of tacks and cans.
Overall Score: 6.25/10
The main event was pretty good, maybe even a little better than I gave it credit for; I’m just sick of seeing some crazy hardcore match so often from Impact. It feels like its weekly, and that’s too damn much. Trey is terrible, and that’s a hill I’m willing to die on. He sells poorly, he doesn’t tell a story with his wrestling and he looks like an idiot pretending to be something he isn’t; and that’s talented.
Myers is fine with his classic delusional heel style, Delirious gave a bit of a rub to Taurus so I’m guessing he’s probably next up in the X Division. But a straight 15 minutes of interviews and talking is just too damn much especially when the surrounding wrestling isn’t very good or hearty enough to help people tolerate talking time.
I do however love Joe Hendry. So…yeah. There’s always some quirky gimmicks that just resonate well with me, and this is gorgeous.
All in all, decent enough; though next week could be a real banger of a Go Home.
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