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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (11/26/21)

The Island of Relevancy awaits.

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Coverage SmackDown 2021

Who will earn their shot at Roman Reigns?

The WWE Universal Champion was SmackDown’s shining Survivor Series win, but it’s back to business. Who wins a battle royal to become #1 contender?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Drew McIntyre & Jeff Hardy VS “Happy” Corbin & “Mad Cap” Moss; McIntyre & Hardy win.
  • Ridge Holland w/ Sheamus VS Cesaro; Cesaro wins.
  • Thanksgiving Leftovers Throwdown: Rick Boogs w/ Shinsuke Nakamura VS Angel Garza w/ Humbert Carrillo; Garza wins.
  • Sasha Banks & Naomi VS Shayna Baszler & Natalya; Sasha & Naomi win.
  • WWE Universal Championship #1 Contender’s Battle Royal: Sami Zayn wins and will challenge Roman Reigns for the title.

PLAY BY PLAY

Kayla Braxton is in the ring!

She welcomes us to this post-Thanksgiving edition of Friday Night SmackDown, and says rumors continue to heat up that Brock Lesnar’s indefinite suspension- Roman Reigns interrupts! The Head of the Table, Paul Heyman carrying the Universal Championship for him, stands on stage, then is handed the belt for the pyro. Roman then continues down to the ring, Heyman holing the title up as a banner. And then Roman holds the title up in the ring for more pyro. Heyman allows Kayla to step forward, but has her hand over the mic. “Rumorssss? Rumors about Brrrock. Lesnarrr. That’s the best you got? Rumors? We don’t do rumorsss on the Island of Relevancy.”

That’s Kayla’s problem! She parades around here like she’s a journalist with breaking news about Lesnar’s suspension when she knows it’s personal to Roman and Heyman, but she just wants the spotlight for herself. Heyman tells fans not to boo her, they can’t judge any of them in the ring. Heyman defended Kayla because she’s a coworker but he’s disappointed in her. She needs confirmation, denial, or facts! That’s what Roman deals in. Heyman used to like Kayla because people said she’s pretty. But Kayla is living her life through an Instagram filter. But there is no filter that makes you a legit journalist. Until she is one, this is her cue to leave Roman’s ring. Thank you for your time, good night.

Kayla storms off, but fans chant, “We Want Brock!” Roman gets the mic and asks Heyman, “Do you want to know the problem with rumors? Rumors give loses false hope. And compared to me, everyone’s a loser around here.” Roman’s beaten them all! And Lesnar is the number one loser around here. Roman beat him and it wasn’t even in ideal conditions. Roman flew all around the world and smashed Lesnar. Roman doesn’t care about rumors and that’s the facts. Y’know who else is a loser? Big E, the WWE Champion, is a loser cuz he got smashed at Survivor Series. But they’re just part of a long list! Roman’s beat them all. Roman’s running laps, it’s getting embarrassing!

What did management do? What’s that thing for tonight? A Black Friday Battle Royal to determine a #1 contender for the Head of the Table? C’mon…! Battle royal, elimination match, gauntlet, three way, four way, five way, it don’t matter. Just let three or four of them win and he’ll smash ’em all! Roman can do that because he’s the best of the best, the Universal Champion, the Head of the Table, YOUR Tribal Chief, and the Greatest of All Time. When Roman’s days are down, which could be sooner than later, the whole world will acknowledge him. Roman doesn’t care who wins tonight, but will he take that winner seriously when it’s time to take that person on?

 

Drew McIntyre & Jeff Hardy VS “Happy” Corbin & “Mad Cap” Moss!

The Scottish Warrior watched the Charismatic Enigma’s back before Survivor Series, and now has his back here against the hyenas. Will Hardy Country also become Claymore Country here in Greensboro? Or will Corbin & Moss become insufferable with a win here tonight?

SmackDown returns as Corbin & Moss make their entrance. The teams sort out but Corbin attacks Hardy from behind! Corbin stomps Hardy, gloats then drags Hardy up to whip him to a corner. Hardy dodges then atomic drops and trips Corbin up for the leg splitting leg drop! Basement dropkick, then a wrench. Corbin clubs and ROCKS Hardy, then tags in Moss. Moss mugs Hardy with knees, then runs and runs to run Hardy over! Moss keeps moving, Hardy hip tosses him down! Cover, ONE! Hardy tags McIntyre in and fans fire up as they double whip Moss to double elbow and fist drop splash combo! Cover, TWO!

McIntyre keeps on Moss and CHOPS him in the corner. Fans fire up, but Moss throat chops McIntyre. Moss whips, McIntyre comes back and CLOBBERS him! McIntyre drags Moss up, wrenches and tags in Hardy. Hardy hops up, double ax handles to Moss’ arm! Hardy wrenches Moss, grinds the shoulder, but Moss powers out. Hardy sends Moss out and wrecks him with a dropkick! Hardy ducks Corbin’s clothesline to hotshot him down! Hardy goes to the apron to FLYING LARIAT Corbin down! But Moss CLOBBERS Hardy into the timekeeper’s area! Moss laughs it up while SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Corbin fires off body shots on Hardy in a corner. The ref counts, Corbin lets off and whips Hardy corner to corner. Corbin runs, Hardy dodges, but Corbin slides out then slides in to DECK McIntyre! Corbin puts Hardy in the corner, Moss mugs him while Corbin taunts McIntyre and the ref is busy with him. Moss tags in, but Hardy kicks back! Moss slips out of the Twist, DOUBLE CLOTHESLINES bring both men down! Fans fire up, Moss and Hardy crawl, hot tags to Corbin and McIntyre! McIntyre rallies with big lariats, then a whip to an elbow! McIntyre gets Corbin in a corner, OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Moss runs in but into a NECKBREAKER!

McIntyre dodges Corbin, Corbin slides out and in but McIntyre dodges to NECKBREAKER! And kip up! Fans fire up with McIntyre as he calls for the countdown! The fans count it down but McIntyre has to hit Moss first! Corbin gets McIntyre for a DEEP SIX! Cover, TWO! Corbin is furious but he drags McIntyre over to tag in Moss. They mug McIntyre, Moss scoops and Corbin goes up. Hardy saves McIntyre and then McIntyre ROCKS Moss! McIntyre dodges Corbin, Corbin jumps into Hardy’s kick! Corbin blocks the Twist and shoves Hardy out! McIntyre clotheslines Corbin out! Moss forearms but McIntyre HEADBUTTS! McIntyre then dodges to CLAYMORE Moss down!

Fans are thunderous and McIntyre tags in Hardy! Hardy throws off the shirt, climbs up top, SWANTON BOMB! Cover, Hardy & McIntyre win!

Winners: Drew McIntyre & Jeff Hardy, by pinfall

Greensboro is red hot for their hometown hero and the Scottish Warrior! But will this be the last either of them has heard from the chuckle headed Corbin and Moss?

 

Aliyah talks with Kayla backstage.

She wants to know as much as anyone about the rumors, but then Heyman walks over. Aliyah hurries off and Heyman asks Kayla if she got any updates on the rumors. See, this is what Kayla needs to do. She needs to get a confirmation or a denial. But the thing is, there are no rumors about Lesnar, because he got himself suspended. He put his hands on Adam Pearce not once but twice to leave the WWE no options. But Lesnar is hiding behind the suspension because he fears Roman Reigns. Think that’s a rumor? Call Lesnar. Oh, wait, Heyman doesn’t have his new number, and neither does Kayla.

And that’s another problem. If Kayla doesn’t have a confirmation or denial by the end of tonight, Kayla’s GONE. Or at least, that’s what Heyman’s pushing for. Or maybe it’s just a rumor. Heyman walks off, but what will Kayla do about his not so veiled threat?

 

Ridge Holland w/ Sheamus VS Cesaro!

Northern Grit made quite the impression on his hero, The Celtic Warrior, in helping Sheamus get the win last week to join Team SmackDown at Survivor Series. Now Holland looks to make an even bigger impression taking the Swiss Cyborg on himself! Will the Fella love what he sees from his brand new protégé?

SmackDown returns and Cesaro makes his entrance. The bell rings and the two tie up. Cesaro puts Holland in a corner, lets off as the ref counts, but then he counter punches Holland, fires off body shots and EuroUppers, then whips him corner to corner. Cesaro runs in to EuroUpper, then climbs up to rain down fists! Sheamus distracts Cesaro and that allows Holland to trip Cesaro up! Holland runs and POUNCES him! Then he puts Cesaro in the corner, fires off EuroUppers and body shots of his own. Holland reels Cesaro in to CLOBBER him! Cover, TWO! Holland keeps on Cesaro with a seated cobra twist and he thrashes Cesaro all around.

Fans boo, then rally up for Cesaro. Cesaro stands up, Holland ripcords him but Cesaro fires off hands! Holland traps the arms to headbutt then OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Cover, TWO! Holland sits Cesaro up to CLUB him, then clamps on a chinlock. Holland grinds Cesaro down but Cesaro fights up and throws body shots. Holland reverses the whip and tilt-o-whirl POWERSLAMS! Cover, ONE, so Holland rains down forearms and knees, and then drops elbows! Holland gets complimented by Sheamus and Holland pie faces Cesaro. Cesaro drags Holland down into a lateral press, Cesaro wins!!

Winner: Cesaro, by pinfall

Holland’s ego was being fed a little too much and that cost him.

 

Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce are visited by Drew McIntyre.

Sonya asks, “Can we help you?” McIntyre says he doesn’t want to be presumptuous, but considering the stakes, he wants to make sure he’s in that “Black Friday Invitational Battle Royal.” Well they don’t have the final list of competitors yet, but when they do, they’ll let him know. Well like he said, he expects an invitation. Pearce would if he were McIntyre, too. McIntyre heads out, but will he be in that contender’s match later tonight?

 

Rick Boogs is here!

And he of course introduces the WWE Intercontinental Champion, Shinsuke NakamurAAAAA~! The King of Strong Style rocks with Boogs, as does Pat McAfee and the fans. However, it won’t be Nakamura that goes to battle, it’s BOOGS! Will he get his fill against Los Lotharios?

Thanksgiving Leftovers Throwdown: Rick Boogs w/ Shinsuke Nakamura VS Angel Garza w/ Humbert Carrillo!

SmackDown returns and Los Lotharios are already in the ring. Garza takes off his pants, throws them at Boogs and dropkicks him down, the same tactic he used against Nakamura! Garza mugs Boogs at the ropes, then drags him out to aim at the table. Boogs blocks, throws elbows and then lifts Garza! Garza gets to the apron and dropkicks Boogs down! Garza puts Boogs in the ring, clamps on a chinlock and grinds him down with a straitjacket stretch. Fans rally up, Boogs endures, and Boogs powers up, only for Garza to throw him down! Garza stomps Boogs down and wraps the straitjacket back on. Fans chant, “We Want Tables!” while Boogs yells and arm-drags out!

Boogs scoops Garza for a spinning toss! Then he gut wrenches Garza for the shakedown! And then gut wrench suplex! Carrillo gets up but Boogs DECKS him! Garza kicks, Boogs blocks and gut wrenches Garza all around! POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO! Boogs fires up and gets Garza back up for an abdominal stretch! But Carrillo starts playing Boogs’ guitar! Boogs tells Carrillo to stop, but Nakamura sweeps Carrillo’s legs, and Carrillo falls through the table! All the cranberry sauce and corn gets on him, but Garza SUPERKICKS Boogs, to the WING CLIPPER! Cover, Garza wins!

Winner: Angel Garza, by pinfall

While one Lothario is feeling left out like the leftovers, the other gets a win to get even with Nakamura & Boogs. What will it take for these four to settle the score?

 

Adam Pearce looks over the roster.

Kayla Braxton asks if he can reveal who will be in the invitational battle royal. He says that as soon as he gets approval, he’ll post it right outside the door. Then can he also comment on the rumors of the possible reinstatement of Brock Lesnar? She is sure he recalls the events around the suspension… Pearce takes a moment, and he says he hasn’t heard anything about the changes to the indefinite suspension. But stranger things have happened. But when you consider the damage, not just the property damage or the medical bills or the… therapy sessions… “Brock Lesnar is a menace. And I personally would be shocked if that suspension were to be lifted any time soon.” Pearce excuses himself to handle business, is that denial enough to satisfy Heyman?

 

Charlotte Flair heads to the ring!

She may not have defeated Big Time Becks, but the Queen is still the SmackDown Women’s Champion, and North Carolina is still Flair Country! But how will she move on from Survivor Series? We’ll see, after the break.

SmackDown returns and Michael Cole joins Charlotte in the ring. He says Charlotte must be very disappointed about her loss to Becky Lynch. Disappointed? No. The only thing she’s disappointed in is the poor officiating in that match. We all saw how Becky won. The only way she could win was by blatantly cheating. But congrats to her, she’s as underhanded as Charlotte knew she was. Becky has a shallow victory. She’s not stronger, just lucky. All that proved is that Becky is everything Charlotte’s said she was. Deep down, they both know Charlotte’s the better woman. Charlotte is the reason for Becky’s success.

Then the question would be, is what is next for Charlotte Flair? Becky can pretend to be big time on Raw and fantasy land, but in reality, Charlotte is still the most dominant woman in sports entertainment. But here comes Toni Storm! Wow, wow, wow. Toni knew Becky got in Charlotte’s head, but this is something. The obsessions with Becky made Charlotte vulnerable, and just as Toni predicted, Becky won. So what happens next? Charlotte goes after Toni for standing up to the high and mighty Charlotte Flair! Toni figured she’d make this easier for Charlotte and come right here to her. Aw, how cute, Toni. You think Charlotte was going after her? Charlotte barely knew Toni existed.

There is a reason Charlotte wipes her boots on the apron before getting in the ring. There are levels to this, and Charlotte is on a different one. So how would Toni like to be embarrassed tonight? Beaten to a pulp? Or more like this? But Toni dodges the sucker punch then throws Charlotte out! Toni then goes out, but gets a PIE to the FACE! That one had a lot of whipped cream on it! Charlotte licks her fingers, but Toni gets back up. Charlotte dares her to bring it, and then just PIES Toni again! Charlotte walks off and leaving Toni steaming. Will Toni get even with the Queen for the holidays?

 

Sonya Deville talks on the phone.

Sasha walks over and interrupts. At Survivor Series, Sasha was the captain, but Sonya sabotaged her with a team full of traitors. Everyone saw what Natty, Shayna and Shotzi did: they screwed her over. This was Sonya’s team, so Sasha blames her. As captain, Sasha should’ve been able to choose her own team. And if Naomi was on the team, they would’ve won. What’s Sonya’s problem with Naomi to begin with? Sonya laughs that off and tells Sasha to watch her tone. Second, this isn’t how things work. You can’t rewrite history. The captain lost and that’s on her. Also, there is no issue with Naomi. Oh is that so? Because Sonya’s voice changes when she lies.

Is Sonya jealous of Naomi? Is it because Naomi is more athletic? More popular? Has a bigger following? Is it because Naomi’s a two-time SmackDown Women’s Champion while Sonya’s been downgraded to a suit? Damn right Sonya’s wearing a suit, because she’s the boss. But if Sasha loves Naomi so much, team up with her against Natalya & Shayna. Sonya takes her leave, but will the Boss & The Glow take care of business against the Queen of Harts & Queen of Spades?

 

SmackDown shares another chapter of Xia Li’s story.

“I still remember his deep breath echoing in the empty school hallway. His mouth scrunched into a growl. He has picked on my older brother for weeks. A relentless assault. My pacifist brother. My quiet, kind brother who is too good for this violent world. I hate vultures. Their confidence grows like mold on dirty dishes. If you let it, they will suffocate your spirit. I hate vultures.” Xia Li is The Protector! She sees the wicked and fights them. Who will be first for Xia to battle when she arrives?

 

Sasha Banks & Naomi VS Shayna Baszler & Natalya!

SmackDown returns as the Queen and Queen are already in the ring. But the Boss makes her entrance to join Naomi. The teams sort out while Sonya defends there was no rigged ref last week. Shayna and Sasha start, fans rally up for The Boss but Shayna pie faces her. Sasha SLAPS back! Sasha then gets Shayna to the ropes, shoulders in from the apron and steps in to tilt-o-whirl. Shayna resists the takedown, trips Sasha, turns her and has the ANKLE LOCK! Sasha fights up, but Shayna reels her into the KIRAFUDA KLUTCH! Sasha backs Shayna up, Naomi tags in, Sasha snapmares free and Naomi wrenches Shayna to a crucifix takedown.

TWO, but Naomi reels Shayna in for a sunset flip! Shayna stays up and has an arm! Shayna tortures Naomi’s wrist, but Naomi fights up. Shayna bends the elbow, tags Natty, and Natty stomps Naomi. Natty headlocks, hits the takeover, and grinds Naomi down. Naomi headscissors, Natty kips free but Naomi kips up, too! Natty SLAPS Naomi, whips her to a corner but Naomi goes up and over then baits Natty into a dropkick! And another! Natty bails out but Naomi storms over. Shayna gets in the way but Naomi DECKS her! Naomi baseball slides but Natty ducks to get the atomic sit-down! Tag to Shayna and she PENALTY KICKS Naomi down!

Shayna puts Naomi in the ring, then wraps on the KIRAFUDA KLUTCH! Sasha baits Natty, dodges her, then gives Shayna a BACKSTABBER! The Boss helps out Naomi and fans fire up as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Natty has Naomi in a cobra twist, but Naomi hip tosses free! Hot tag to Shayna and she DECKS Sasha before Naomi can get there! Shayna taunts Naomi, CLUBS her, gets a leg and bends it at the knee. Naomi endures the toehold, Natty taunts the fans, but Naomi kicks Shayna with the free leg! Shayna turns Naomi over to STOMP the ankle! Shayna tags Naomi, they drag Naomi up and double snap suplex! Cover, ONE! Naomi is still in this but Natty keeps her down with a chinlock. Natty grabs Naomi’s arm that reaches for Sasha and brings her away. Fans rally up, Naomi throws elbows but Natty throws her down by her hair!

Natty tags Shayna, they both throw Naomi down by her hair! Cover, TWO! Shayna has a standing toehold, Naomi endures, and she stomps at Shayna’s leg! Shayna tags Natty but Naomi fights them both off! DOUBLE BULLDOG! Fans fire up and Naomi hurries over, but Shayna trips Sasha off the apron! Sasha ROCKS Shayna, but gets tripped up again! Shayna whips but Sasha reverses and Shayna hits barriers! METEORA! Naomi dodges Natty, rolls her up, TWO! Natty rolls Naomi, TWO! DISCUS LARIAT! Natty covers again, TWO! Naomi is still in this and she goes to the apron. Natty grabs her legs and drags her back, then drags her up to scoop and MICHINOKU DRIVER! Cover, TWO!!

Naomi survives and Sonya is amused. Natty seethes while Naomi crawls to the apron.  Natty drags Naomi up but Naomi ROUNDHOUSES her down! Sunset flip, high stack, Naomi & Sasha win!

Winners: Sasha Banks & Naomi, by pinfall

Sonya applauds the win, but it could just be for appearances. Naomi hops down to stare Sonya down, but is it only a matter of time before Sonya has a new way to mess with The Glow?

 

The list has been posted!

Jeff Hardy, Ricochet, Sheamus, Ridge Holland, Rick Boogs, Happy Corbin, Mansoor, Mad Cap Moss, Sami Zayn, Cesaro, Jinder Mahal, Shanky, both Viking Raiders, Drew Gulak, both of Los Lotharios and even MACE are in, but now Drew McIntyre? Well that might not sit well with him. Sheamus tries to tell him, but McIntyre didn’t make the cut. Sheamus then laughs his way out, and McIntyre is seething. Will this snub go unpunished for Adam Pearce?

Black Friday Invitational WWE Universal Championship #1 Contender’s Battle Royal!

The Great Liberator heads out first, followed by Erik & Ivar. In the end, it will be every man for himself, but will the Viking Raiders be able to raid all the way until the end?

SmackDown returns and Ricochet makes his entrance. Everyone else is in the ring already, the match introduction is made, and wait, here comes McIntyre! He doesn’t seem to care that he got left off the lift, he’s getting in on this! And everyone else clears out as he starts swinging Angela the Claymore!! He dares anyone to get back in the ring but then Pearce runs out and shouts at McIntyre. McIntyre says this is on Pearce, and dares them to make him leave! This madness sorts out while SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns again and the battle royal is on, minus McIntyre. Sheamus fights Los Lotharios, Sami works to be the odd man out in the gaps, but Ivar finds him! Ivar goes after Sami in a corner, Roman and the Bloodline watch backstage. Pearce stays ringside to make sure McIntyre doesn’t return. Hardy and Cesaro ELIMINATE Mahal! Gulak and Sami work together but Cesaro holds on! So Gulak betrays Sami! Cesaro gets in, EuroUpppers Gulak, throws him out but Gulak holds on. Sami runs to HELLUVA KICK and ELIMINATE Gulak! But then Cesaro goes after Sami! Sami fights Cesaro off and bumps him off buckles.

Mansoor jump son Sheamus as a sleeper hold backpack but Holland CLUBS him down! Sheamus and Holland throw Mansoor out but Mansoor skins the cat! But he gets DOUBLE KNEES from Holland & Sheamus, the ELIMINATE him! Happy Corbin is after Ricochet, Mace gets Madcap with both hands! But Moss punches free and fireman’s carries to throw Mace out and ELIMINATE him! Sheamus digs boots into Hardy, Shanky CLUBS Moss! Moss throws body shots then throat chops Shanky back! Sheamus saves Holland from Ivar, Moss dumps Shanky out and ELIMINATES him! But then Cesaro gets Moss up! Sheamus and Holland go after Cesaro!

Boogs helps Cesaro against Sheamus and Holland! Cesaro dumps Holland out and ELIMINATES him! Moss dumps Cesaro and ELIMINATES him! Corbin and Moss high-five, and then Moss goes after Corbin! Just kidding! Moss’ sense of humor pays off, but then Corbin throws Moss out and ELIMINATES him! Corbin says it’s nothing personal, and Moss is able to laugh it off. But will these two be celebrating later? The field is still competitive as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns once more and Hardy works on Sheamus, Ivar brawls with Ricochet, Boogs is after Corbin but Los Lotharios goes after Boogs. Sami hangs back while Corbin and Ivar work on Ricochet. Ricochet fights free, then throws hands and CHOPS in return! Sheamus spots Sami but Sami says they should work together on Hardy. Sheamus seems to agree, but then he kicks and CLUBS away on Sami! Corbin whips Ricochet to a corner, runs in and clobbers Ricochet! Erik and Ivar work together to mug Corbin. Boogs kicks Garza, Humberto kicks him. Humberto springboard ROUNDHOUSES! Garza clotheslines Boogs up and out, they ELIMINATE Boogs!

Los Lotharios go after Erik but Ivar saves him from the double suplex. Ivar throws and ELIMINATES Garza, then the Vikings work together to TOSS Humberto out onto him! The Vikings ELIMINATE Los Lotharios! They give Sami KNEE after KNEE, but Sami flops out under the top rope! Ivar SPLASHES Ricochet in the corner, Erik uses Ivar as a weapon, HIP ATTACK in the corner! The Viking Raiders fight Sheamus, knock him down, then drag him up to aim for ropes! Sheamus fights free, clotheslines Erik out and ELIMINATES him! Ivar runs in but Sheamus dumps him out Sheamus ELIMINATES the Viking Raiders! The final four are Sheamus, Ricochet, Hardy and Corbin!

Ricochet goes after Sheamus, Hardy saves himself against Corbin, Sheamus whips but Ricochet ducks and dodges and springboards to crossbody! Fans fire up as Hardy runs in but Ricochet boot shim away. Somersault SHOTGUN! Ricochet gets up but Corbin CLOBBERS him! Corbin drags Ricochet up, knees low, then takes a moment to stalk Ricochet. Ricochet fires off haymakers, runs but into a choke grip, CHOKE SLAM BACKBREAKER! Corbin whips, Ricochet goes up but can’t get over! Corbin puts him on the apron but Ricochet shoulders in then springboard missile dropkicks! Ricochet gets Corbin up and to the ropes but Corbin rakes eyes!

Corbin blocks a kick but Ricochet ENZIGURIS! Sheamus BROGUES Ricochet down! Sheamus tosses and ELIMINATES Ricochet! Sheamus fires hands but Corbin fires back! They brawl but Hardy stays a safe distance away. Sheamus throws Corbin at ropes but Corbin holds on! Sheamus throws knees, Corbin elbows back. Hardy runs in and attack sin the corner! Then he hits Corbin in the other corner! Hardy rams his shoulder into Sheamus again and again, then runs, but into a LARIAT! Sheamus drags Hardy up, whips him to a corner, but Hardy elbows back. Hardy goes up the corner, WHISPER IN THE WIND! Down goes Sheamus!

But Corbin gets Hardy up to whip, but Hardy reverses! Corbin is on the ropes, TWIST OF FATE sends him staggering! Sheamus storms over to stomp Hardy down! Corbin shoves Sheamus, Sheamus shoves Corbin, but they agree to go after Hardy. Fans rally for Hardy as he holds on to the ropes! Hardy elbows them away, so Corbin tosses Sheamus out and ELIMINATES him! Hardy tosses Corbin out and- Wait! Sami wasn’t eliminated! He throws Hardy out!! SAMI WINS!!

Winner: Sami Zayn (NEW #1 Contender to the WWE Universal Championship)

Kayla interviews Sami and congratulates him. Sami says it is finally happening, but Kayla is suddenly getting word from the back. BREAKING NEWS! The suspension has been lifted! Brock Lesnar will be on SmackDown NEXT WEEK! Is this true? What does this mean for Sami, Roman and the Universal title?!


My Thoughts:

Not the best SmackDown for after a PPV, but decent stuff to build off what we had both last week and from Survivor Series. I knew McIntyre & Hardy would be in this tag match tonight, and that they’d win. I didn’t expect there to be a battle royal to choose Roman’s next challenger but I suppose it worked within story since, as Roman said in his promo, he’s beaten the best of them. I was hoping that with McIntyre kept out but Hardy put it, Hardy would get his chance. But no, WWE actively makes it so hometown heroes lose instead. I’m a bit surprised it’s Sami who won, then, but with the revelation that Lesnar’s reinstated, maybe Sami’s going to be fed to both Lesnar and Roman in this title match build.

I didn’t put it here but surprise surprise, Angel Garza & Humberto Carrillo have lost their last names. Also the themed street fight tonight was lame, not because it was themed but because it was so damn short and barely did anything with the food promos. The only good thing was that the stuff didn’t go to waste. The pies were used in the promo between Charlotte Flair and Toni Storm. That match is definitely happening but I guess this was a clear indication Charlotte ain’t losing if she got to pie Toni twice. Sasha seems to be joining Naomi in this fight against Sonya’s power abuse, I wouldn’t be surprised if Aliyah and Shotzi were thrown in for a Six Woman Tag.

My Score: 8.2/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (1/17/22)

Is Becky Lynch sweatin’ Doudrop?

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WWE Raw 2022

The Man prepares for the Royal Rumble!

“Doudrop” Piper Niven is coming for the Raw Women’s Championship, and she won’t be Manhandled so easily! How will Becky Lynch counter Piper’s power?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bianca Belair & Liv Morgan VS “Doudrop” Piper Niven & Becky Lynch; Piper & Becky win.
  • Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens; Kevin wins.
  • Finn Balor VS Austin Theory; Theory wins.
  • Nikki A.S.H. VS Rhea Ripley; No Contest.
  • Reggie w/ Dana Brooke VS Omos; Omos wins.
  • 8 Man Tag: The Street Profits & The Mysterios VS Apollo Crews, Commander Azeez & The Dirty Dawgs; The Street Profits & Mysterios win.
  • Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Seth Rollins; Lashley wins, by disqualification.

PLAY BY PLAY

Becky Lynch heads to the ring!

Tulsa, Oklahoma, The Man has come ’round! Fans chant her name as she gets the mic, and she welcomes them to the Big Time! “Now we are less than two weeks away from the Royal Rumble, and the Raw Women’s Division has never been hotter. And whether you like to admit it or not, there’s only one person responsible for that, and that’s me.” Becky says it is so hot that there are stars from generations past, like Lita, Mickie James and the Bella Twins, all hoping that they can win the Rumble and challenge the #VanGOAT at WrestleMania. Face it, they need Becky because she makes stars.

Look no further than Doudrop. Becky has kindly given her the biggest opportunity of her life, a taste of the Big Time at one of the biggest events of the year. The people didn’t get her that! Piper Niven didn’t get it for herself. Becky did that! That is what Becky does! She makes people better, than she beats ’em! But Becky will admit that she admires Piper’s tenacity. She came from the rolling hills of Scotland and made a name for herself. Well no, someone else had to make up a name for her. So Becky will shoot it straight for “Doudou.” A doudrop will never be champion so long as The Man is still here.

But speaking of, here she comes! Piper storms right up to the ring, gets herself a mic and says she’s gonna tell Becky something. “You didn’t get me anything. I got myself this title match at Royal Rumble. But if it was really your plan to face me instead of Bianca, than it’s the biggest mistake you’ve ever made. Just make sure you stay well out of my way tonight.” Becky says she did get Piper that win last week, and if Piper just follows her lead, they’ll get a win here tonight. But here comes Bianca Belair! “Oh, Becky. You really out here spittin’ all this nonsense about being the GOAT, the greatEST of all time, but let me remind y’all that you can’t spell greatest without E S T.”

Bianca joins Piper and Becky in the ring as fans chant for “EST! EST!” Bianca reminds us SHE is the EST of WWE. And Doudrop, uh, okay. The only reason Piper is facing Becky is because Ms. Big Time was so scared of Bianca, she interfered in last week’s match. But girl, uh-uh. That’s just buyin’ time. Because Bianca is officially entering the Royal Rumble match! And it’s gonna be every woman for themselves, so if Bianca’s gotta throw out every 29 other women like she did last year, she’ll do it. Then she’ll go main event WrestleMania… again. And Bianca can go after whichever champion she wants, which could be Becky or Piper.

But now, Bianca’s tag partner, Liv Morgan, arrives! “Well, well, well, Bianca. We may be tag teaming tonight, but I am also officially entering myself in the Royal Rumble match. And that’s not all, that’s not all. Because in two weeks, I’m also the one winning it.” But that means Bianca will be one of the 29 she outlasts on the way to WrestleMania. But since we’re on the same page- Piper pretends to snore and then says this is boring. Everyone, shut up and ref, get in here! Piper wants to fight, but it’s Becky who riles up Liv and Bianca, and then uses Piper as a shield! Piper welcomes someone to bring it, but this starts after the break.

 

Chad Gable prepares a speech.

“Greetings and salutations…” Otis walks over, the valedictorian of The Alpha Academy. Will this graduation ceremony go off without a hitch?

 

Bianca Belair & Liv Morgan VS “Doudrop” Piper Niven & Becky Lynch!

Raw returns and the bell rings, and Bianca dropkicks Piper! Piper stays up but Bianca whips. Piper blocks, reverses, but Bianca goes up tot ell Piper to kiss this. Then Bianca leaps over Piper, spins her around and reels her in, but Piper blocks the suplex. Piper suplexes, Bianca slips out and then dodges in the corner! Piper hits buckles, Bianca ROCKS Piper with a forearm, then runs in to ram Piper. Piper rebounds to run Bianca over! Piper runs, Becky tags in! Piper is annoyed with Becky but Becky says she’s got this. They argue, Becky turns around into a dropkick! Bianca kips up, tags Liv, Liv dodges Becky to DECK Piper and SHOTGUN Becky!

Becky is in a corner, Liv back body blocks, then SHINING WIZARDS! Liv whips, Becky reverses but Liv stops to back elbow. Liv goes up to leap and missile dropkick Becky down! Liv then brings Becky around, springboard CODE BREAKER! Cover, Piper breaks it! Bianca gets in to ROCK Piper, but she can’t lift Piper for the torture rack. Piper shoves Bianca into a corner and SPLASHES! Piper runs at Liv but Liv sends her out! Becky rolls Liv up, has feet on the ropes, TWO! Liv kicks low, KICKS again, then runs in, but Becky dodges! Liv elbows Becky again, but runs into a MANHANDLE SLAM! Cover, Piper breaks it?! But that was her own teammate!

Piper drags Becky out of the way, wants to cover, but she’s not legal! So Piper hurries back to her corner, tags herself in, and then runs to SPLASH Liv! Cover, Piper and Becky win!

Winners: “Doudrop” Piper Niven & Becky Lynch, by pinfall

Then Piper celebrates by giving Becky a VADER SEATED SENTON! Piper laughs as she looms over Becky, but will she have the last laugh at the Rumble?

 

Reggie and Dana Brooke talk with someone.

Reggie knows they’ve faced giants in their career, so can they give Reggie any advice when facing Omos tonight? The person he’s talking to is Edge! Edge thinks, and he tells Reggie that he can do things Edge can’t even comprehend. So he has a chance? Hell no! Beth Phoenix scolds Edge with a smack, and Edge says he still wishes Reggie luck. And Beth talks with Dana real quick. She’s seen Dana bust her butt for years here, so it’s so great Dana has a title. Dana thanks Beth for that, and hurries away to keep up with Reggie. Edge and Beth then see Damian Priest. They shake hands and hug and Priest is happy to see the Grit Couple.

Edge says he likes what he sees with Priest’s other side. Yeah, Priest’s other side is a bit edgy, but being serious here, Priest wants some ideas on the Rumble match. Edge has experience, having won two, one of which he won from starting first. There’s no better man to ask for pointers than Edge. Well cardio is one thing, but the main thing is to keep doing you. Priest’s style is working. Someone brings over a note for Beth, and it’s from Maryse. She wants to meet Beth 1v1, woman to woman. Edge says that’s suspicious. Beth is of course going to go but Edge is going to go with her. Beth agrees, and Edge says he and Priest can talk more later. What will the It Couple have planned for the Grit Couple?

Kevin Owens then walks over to ask Priest something. Kevin is looking forward to their match tonight. Really? Yeah, no lie! He’s looking- Oh, right, because Kevin’s so honest. Yes, especially having a good, clean match. Good competition, show off some technical prowess. But also that side, that nutso, vicious side. That side shouldn’t come out. Kevin is just hoping for them having a good, clean match. Kevin also has an announcement to make, so see you then. Good talk. Kevin and his tie hurries off, but will Priest keep Damian from tearing into the Prizefighter?

Kevin heads to the ring!

The KO Show is back, and tonight’s guest is Seth Freakin’ Rollins! What will Kevin ask his new best buddy? We find out, after the break.

Raw returns and Kevin welcomes us to his show. He wishes he could say it’s good to be here in Tulsa, but that would be a vile lie because this place is brutal. Don’t get mad at him telling the truth! And another truth is that Kevin has a very special guest. He is a man Kevin is proud to call his best friend, and after this man beats Roman Reigns at the Royal Rumble like he has in a plethora of matches before, he will be called the Universal Champion. Please welcome Seth! FRRRRREAKIN’! ROLLINS~! Rollins makes his way out to the ring, fired up as always, but especially now after having evaded a Bloodline beatdown on SmackDown last Friday.

Rollins takes up a mic and Kevin lets Rollins decide if they sit or stand. Rollins wants to stand, so he and Kevin kick the chairs aside. Kevin thanks Rollins for accepting his invitation to be a guest. Kevin wants to tell Rollins that he admires Rollins so much. There is so much Kevin admires about Rollins. From the great suits, like this striped one. He looks like a million bucks! MAHVELOUS! And even more so, Kevin admires Rollins’ courage. Do people realize how much guts it took for Rollins to show up on SmackDown, into the lion’s den, get face to face with Roman, and berate him into realizing that “The Head of the Table” is only possible because Rollins set the table.

“Yes, yes, yes! Kev, you hit the nail on the head right there!” Friday got a little testy, but the truth is, Roman’s rattled. Roman’s nervous, and dare Rollins say, Roman is scared. He’s scared! You heard it here first! Roman took the low road taking shots at Rollins’ family, sending the Usos after him. But everyone saw that the Usos couldn’t get the job done. Rollins says Roman is playing checkers while Rollins is playing chess! If Roman keeps this up, winning at the Rumble will be like taking candy from a baby. A little baby Roman! And Rollins will turn the title from blue to red and bring the Universal Championship back to their show, Monday Night Raw!

That’s huge! When Rollins wins, he’s staying on Raw with Kevin! Yes, 100%! Incredible! Then that means Raw has the best champion! Raw wouldn’t need Lesnar or Lashley, they’d have Rollins! Kevin again hits the nail on the head. Get rid of Lesnar. Rollins has a match with Lashley tonight, they can get rid of Lashley tonight! Who knows? Kevin likes the sound of that. But he has something of his own to announce and it is “earth shattering.” It will change the face of the industry! Right here and now, Kevin is officially declaring for the Royal Rumble! Rollins says that IS earth shattering!

Kevin will win the Rumble, Rollins will beat Roman, and the WWE Universe will get the match they… well, not deserve. But they’ll get the biggest Mania main-event ever! SETH FREAKIN’ ROLLINS VS KEVIN FREAKIN’ OWENS! Rollins likes where Kevin’s head is at. But here comes Damian Priest! Rollins says this is his time and Kevin’s show! If Priest steps any closer, Kevin will kick his ass! Kevin wants Rollins to stop but Priest tells Rollins to shut up! They’re both delusional idiots! There is not one person on this planet that believes Rollins will win at the Rumble. And Kevin is just a liar, so he isn’t winning, either.

And if Kevin doesn’t want to see Damian, then don’t wake him up. Oh and by the way, Priest talked with Pearce and Sonya. Their match tonight? That starts NOW! Kevin is freaking out, but Rollins tries to encourage him. Will it not matter when the Archer of Infamy takes aim?

 

Veer Mahaan.

In the animal kingdom, the lion bides its time as it hunts its prey. Step by step, until it finally strikes, leaving only scraps for the hyenas. When will the Million Dollar Arm finally strike?

 

Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens!

Raw returns and the bell rings. They tie up, Kevin waistlocks, but Priest pries free to wrench to a wristlock. Kevin rolls, headlocks, but Priest uses a chinbar to push Kevin back and power out. Kevin rams Priest, but then Kevin apologizes, Things speed up, Priest runs Kevin over with a shoulder! Priest runs in at the corner, but Kevin puts him on the apron! Kevin elbows Priest away, but Priest ROUNDHOUSES back! Priest steps in but into a SHOTGUN! Kevin stomps Priest at the ropes, lets off as the ref counts, then drags Priest to center for a SENTON! Kevin wraps on a chinlock and leans on Priest but fans rally up.

Priest fights up, priest the hold open but Kevin CLUBS him on the back. Kevin CHOPS, whips, but Priest reverses. Kevin KCISK back, CHOPS again, and CHOPS! Priest snarls, but Kevin apologizes again. This is just good, clean wrestling! Priest cools off, but then he fires off fast hands! WHEEL KICK! Kevin goes to a corner, Priest runs in but Kevin bails out. Fans boo, Priest keeps cool, but then Priest goes out the side. Priest runs in around the way, leaps off the steps, into a SUPERKICK! Kevin gets back in the ring to refresh the count, then FROG SPLASHES off the apron! Kevin roars while Priest sputters! Kevin drags Priest up and in as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Priest CLOBBERS Kevin! Fans fire up as Priest aims from a corner, and Priest throws haymakers! Priest fires off KICK after KICK, then a ROLLING ELBOW! Kevin rebounds, into a FLAPJACK! Priest runs at Kevin in the corner, for a big back elbow! Priest reels Kevin in, but Kevin wrenches out to ROCK Priest! Kevin whips, Priest rebounds to LARIAT! Priest gets Kevin up for the BROKEN ARROW! Cover, TWO! Priest is annoyed but he drags Kevin up. Priest ROCKS Kevin with a right, hoists him up top in the corner and ROCKS him again! Priest climbs up, but Kevin hits back!

Priest and Kevin brawl, Priest gets the edge. Priest brings Kevin up, but Kevin blocks the superplex! Kevin throws body shots, and even a headbutt! Kevin headbutts again, Priest falls down! Kevin adjusts, SWANTON BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Priest survives and Kevin thinks of what he has to do now. Kevin aims, kicks but no stunner! Kevin ducks the heel kick, tries gain, but Priest dragon sleepers! But Kevin slips free to pop Priest up, SIT-OUT POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO!! Priest survives again and Kevin is shocked! Fans rally up, Kevin aims, kicks, but Priest blocks to spin and ROUNDHOUSE! Kevin wobbles into a choke grip, SOUTH OF HEAVEN CHOKE SLAM! Cover, TWO!!

Priest is shocked that Kevin survives! Kevin rolls away to a corner but Priest follows. Priest throws hands, whips Kevin corner to corner, but Kevin falls, clutching his leg. The ref checks on Kevin, Kevin flounders up saying it’s cramping up. The ref wants a medic to check this, fans boo but Priest isn’t sure what to make of this. But then Kevin suckers him in for a STUNNER!! Cover, Kevin wins!

Winner: Kevin Owens, by pinfall

Priest was right about Kevin being a liar! But now, Kevin could also be a contender! Will Kevin add the US Championship to his Road to WrestleMania?

 

Backstage interview with Nikki A.S.H.

What is her plan heading into tonight’s match with former tag partner, Rhea Ripley? Nikki tells Sarah that this is no different than any other match. It is clear to Nikki now that she stands on her own, and she couldn’t feel any better. Rhea should be down and out, completely mortified after being proven the friend Nikki didn’t think she was. But Nikki, you were the one who attacked Rhea- Sarah, you need to get your facts straight! Rhea is the one who broke up the team. Rhea is the one who decided to take their friendship and flush it! She is the villain, not Nikki! And Nikki is the closest thing that the people of Tulsa will ever have to a real hero. She will be the People’s Hero.

And sometimes, heroes have to do things that regular people don’t understand. After tonight, Rhea will realize that she needs a superhero, whether she likes it or not. Nikki strikes her superhero pose and walks away, but will Rhea’s brutality smack some sense into her?

 

The Alpha Academy heads to the ring.

Pomp & Circumstance plays because today is Otis’ graduation! Will the NEW Raw Tag Team Champions be celebrating on top of their big title victory from last week?

Raw returns and Gable is at the podium. “Greetings and salutations my fellow colleagues and… Oh who am I kidding? I don’t have any colleagues here, considering I’m an Olympian with a Master’s Degree that did it with an immaculate 4.0 GPA! Thank you! Don’t do that. Don’t boo education. That’s gross, everybody.” But it makes sense, since the odds of anyone in Oklahoma having a Master’s, let alone graduating high school, are slim to none! Now shoosh! Tonight is about celebrating. Not just an institution but an individual. Gable could go on and on about himself, because his list is long.

But tonight is about a man who overcame the odds. An absolute tree trunk in the ring and a great student in the classroom. Gable’s prized pupil, his protégé, his number one guy, OTIS! Gable’s so proud. Last week, Otis applied the lessons and passed his final exam by decimating the moronic RKBRO and claimed the Academy’s rightful spot as tag team champions! So tonight, it is Gable’s honor and pleasure- Fans chant with “RKBRO! RKBRO!” They’re trying to have a ceremony for Otis! Gable presents to Otis, who has no last name anymore, the highest graduating honors from the Alpha Academy! The music plays again as they hug it out.

Gable says Otis has the floor. Look at that face! Otis thanks Chad, and says Gable has helped him reach his full potential. But now he has a warning: expect pure carnage for anyone who messes with the titles! They ain’t stopping, and they ain’t ever gonna stop! But here comes Matt Riddle! The Bro is in his own graduation gown, but it has mismatched sleeves… Riddle asks, “What’s up, bros? Big O, you’re looking pretty, pretty tight. And you guys don’t even wanna know what I had to get this graduation gown on time.” But when he got invited to this ceremony, he knew he had to make a very special speech.

Riddle brings out his speech, written on a napkin from this morning’s breakfast buffet. “Fellow graduates and Tulsinians. IT felt like just last week, Randy and I were the WWE Raw Tag Team Champions. We were livin’ on the edge, drivin’ with the top down, lettin’ the wind blow through our hair. We were just a couple o’ young, wild stallions runnin’ free. But today is graduation day. And our lives will change forever. Randy would always say, ‘Life comes at ya pretty fast.'” Gable stops him there, he has no idea what he’s going on about. Riddle was NOT invited to this. And Oklahoma can’t afford to lose another braincell, so just be on your way.

Riddle has “Gablestiltskin” take it easy. Riddle wants to say how proud he is of them. Them and their astronomical necks. See? He can use big words, too, Chad! Gable says Riddle is an idiot. He already ruined Otis’ night, so get to the point. RKBRO wants a rematch? Problem is, Riddle probably can’t even define the word rematch. Riddle so can! A rematch is… uh… when you have to light something up twice! Like a candle! But hey, a rematch sounds like a pretty sick idea. Fans wanna see it! Gable knew it. No wonder Orton left Riddle high and dry. Where even is he? Riddle unzips his gown to show off his “Hey Raaaandy” shirt.

Gable and Otis will give them a rematch, under one condition: they have to prove their mental aptitude in an Alpha Academy Academic Challenge! Otis suddenly looks worried. TO spell it out, it’s Riddle & Randy VS the Academy to prove the smarter team! Because we already saw who the physically dominant team is! Whoa, an academic challenge? Like Billy Madison? Or more like Wheel of Fortune? Riddle loves spinning that wheel, and maybe he and Otis could run in a giant hamster wheel. Gable kinda looks like a jacked hamster, but with three times the brains. Otis is furious and throws off his gown! Riddle wants Otis to back it up and cool off.

Otis storms up the ramp, barking about this being his night! But Orton gets in the ring to RKO Gable!! And then Riddle trips up Otis on the apron! RKBRO got one over on the Academy, and now Orton wears one of the red graduation gowns! Orton gets the mic to then tell the Academy, “We accept!” Will Riddle & Orton get PhDs in kicking the Academy’s asses?

 

Austin Theory visits Vince McMahon.

Theory thanks Vince for the rematch with Finn Balor. But uh, what’s Vince watching on his TV? It was the previous match, where Finn won. Oh… Theory knows he lost, but then he beat the hell outta Finn and nearly ended his career. In fact, it was like a half victory. No such thing. So tonight, Theory needs to beat Finn and beat him up. If Theory doesn’t, Vince will get someone to drag Theory to this office and Vince will beat Theory up! Smash him all over, and by the time he’s finished, it’ll just be blood, snot and broken teeth. Then Vince will take a selfie with that. And send it to Mama Theory! Oh… Theory has been warned, will he make good on this rematch?

 

WWE honors Martin Luther King Jr.

“Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. That all men would be guaranteed the unalienable rights of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” That dream of MLK’s, where we judge not by the color of skin but by character, is still alive. We will all reach the Promised Land together.

 

Finn Balor VS Austin Theory!

Raw returns and Theory makes his entrance. The Prince is back after being out a month, will he make Theory pay for every minute he’s missed? The bell rings, they circle and tie up, and Theory puts Finn on ropes. The ref counts, Theory lets off but Finn blocks the cheap shot to kick and headlock! Finn thrashes to grind Theory down, Theory powers out but Finn ducks and dodges, only for Theory to CLOBBER him with an elbow! Theory drags Finn out of the ring to smack off the apron! And then whip him into barriers! Theory goes into the ring and the ring count climbs. Finn stands but Theory goes out after him.

Theory whips, Finn reverses, and Theory hits barriers! Finn then hits a SLINGBLADE! Theory writhes, the count is rising, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Finn rallies, trips and DOUBLE STOMPS Theory down! Theory goes to a corner, Finn runs in and CHOPS! Finn whips Theory corner to corner, Theory reverse but Finn reverses back, ELBOW DROP DDT! Cover, TWO! Finn snarls, Theory crawl to ropes and Finn KICKS him out of the ring! Finn drags Theory up but Theory HOTSHOTS! Theory somersaults in, but into a SLINGBLADE! Finn then runs, into a LARIAT from Theory! Theory hauls Finn up to FLAPJACK HOTSHOT! Fireman’s carry, A T- NO! Finn makes it a roll up, TWO! Theory and Finn get up, and Finn goes to the apron. Finn shoulders into Theory, GAMANGIRIS, then climbs up!

But Theory avoids the Coup De Grace to somersault SHOTGUN! Fireman’s carry, A T L!! Cover, Theory wins!

Winner: Austin Theory, by pinfall

Theory saves himself from Vince’s wrath, and he gets his victory selfie. But to make good on what Vince told him, Theory fires off fists! Theory then drags Finn up, fireman’s carries again, for another A T L! Theory tells Finn to expect the unexpected. But will Finn find a way to teach Theory and Mr. McMahon respect for The Prince?

 

Nikki A.S.H. VS Rhea Ripley!

Before the match, Rhea is interviewed backstage. How does she respond to Nikki saying it was Rhea who ruined the relationship? Rhea says she never intended for this to hurt their friendship. But Nikki made up her mind. Rhea isn’t one to forgive very easily, so what kind of hero attacks a friend? If Rhea’s the villain here, than Nikki’s more delirious than Rhea thought. It’s time to remind everyone who Rhea Ripley is. Is Nikki in for a Nightmare tonight?

Raw returns and Nikki makes her entrance, but then so do Queen Zelina Vega and Carmella. Mella says, “Hear ye, hear ye, Tulsa. The Most Beautiful Woman in All of WWE and Your Queen have arrived to tell everyone in this dusty arena that everything we predicted about Nikki A.S.H. has come true.” Zelina’s word is absolute, and therefore she is correct by default. Not only is she a beloved queen, but also a fairy godmother. Rhea would never have been rid of Nikki without their little push. Rhea should be thanking them! Because they’ve been telling Rhea for weeks that if she stuck with an Almost Superhero, she’d never be nothing more than an almost threat.

But seems things are too late. Rhea doesn’t look like anything more than a low class loser. Without Nikki as her security blanket, does Rhea have what it takes? As Zelina’s said, you’re either the most powerful women in the room, or you’re nothing. Zelina is queen, but Rhea will be standing there, covered in trash, looking for someone to leech off of. Rhea doesn’t have the guts to be champion all on her own. Rhea tells them to bring it, then, but Nikki goes after Rhea! The ref wants Nikki to let off, but Nikki keeps hammering Rhea down! Rhea hits back but Nikki throws Rhea down! Nikki is seething, and then she drags Rhea up. Rhea kicks Nikki away but Nikki throws her out!

Nikki WRECKS Rhea with a dropkick, then goes out to RAM her into steel steps! The Almost Superhero leaves Rhea down, but the match is called off. Will Rhea get right? Or will she get revenge?

 

Dana Brooke and Reggie regroup backstage.

What did they talk about? Staying low and staying mobile. That’s right! Reggie is faster, stronger and amazing! Use Omos’ size against him, tire him out, and go for the legs. Meanwhile, R-Truth, Akira Tozawa, Tamina, and a referee are watching while eating popcorn. Dana says Reggie can be vicious and ruthless while also super athletic. Reggie says, “Who am I kidding?” He ran into Omos full speed and bounced off him! Dana says Reggie is the most capable man she knows. Just stay away from him. But even Dana looks worried. Truth says Dana must really hate Reggie. She just told him to get got! Will Reggie even survive his run-in with Omos?

Reggie w/ Dana Brooke VS Omos!

Raw returns and Reggie makes his entrance. Dana is cheering him on, but she still looks very worried. Omos points out the clear height difference, and then he roars! Even that scares Reggie! But then here come the 24/7 Championship hunters! Dana runs into the ring, scoots under Omos and out the other side. Omos catches Tozawa, TOSSES him out, then CLOBBERS Truth! Tamina stares Omos down and Reggie climbs the corner. Tamina goes around Omos, the bell rings, and Reggie leaps! Into Omos’ arms! Omos uses both hands for the MOUNTAIN TOSS! Omos says it’s that easy. Cover, Omos wins.

Winner: Omos, by pinfall

Omos didn’t break a sweat with that one! Will the colossus of Raw continue to dominate until he’s on top of the world?

 

Maryse heads to the ring!

As her note said, she is here to talk with Beth face-to-face. But will that all this be? Or do Miz & Mrs. have a plan for the Glamazon? We find out, after the break.

Raw returns and Maryse has a mic to say, “Bonsoir (good evening), Tulsa.” She assures us The Miz couldn’t make it. He has a very big mouth and likes to agree to things without asking her first, so tonight, she is cleaning up his mess. She then asks Beth to come out alone so they can do this right. Woman to woman, wife to wife and mother to mother, Maryse wants to talk. Beth makes her entrance, but Edge still follows her out. Maryse wants Edge to wait on the ramp until they’ve had this conversation. There aren’t many ways to put this, but the match at the Rumble, it has to be canceled. Uh, okay. This oughta be good, so Beth is all ears.

Maryse says she doesn’t want it, surely Beth doesn’t want it, and the fans don’t want it! Fans boo, they DO want it. Maryse is trying to have a heartfelt moment, guys. Really? Really? Really? Maryse is sure sounding like Miz here… Maryse says she has the mic, so she can be louder than everyone here. It doesn’t matter what you think! Now she’s The Rock? But anyway, Maryse wants Beth to listen. They’re from the same generation in WWE. They fought together. Remember those two minute matches? Fans chant, “You Suck!” but Maryse asks if they’re done.

But Beth, c’mon. They fought together and made the Women’s Division what it is today! They’re great at what they do! Just look at them! Women nowadays main event WrestleMania thanks to these two! So if anything, Maryse thinks that they should be on the same team. They should be a unit! Friends! Even their daughters can be friends! They can have play dates, dinners, or even just a coffee. Beth wants Maryse to know that she speaks for everyone here when she says, “Just shut up!” Seriously? BFF’s? Playdates? Is anyone buying this? NOPE! So that means Maryse takes acting lessons from The Miz.

Beth boils it down to a simple answer: the match is NOT off. Beth is NOT missing the chance to tag team with her husband for the first time ever. And she is NOT missing the chance to Glam Slam Maryse’s ass through the canvas! In fact, why not give the fans a preview? Beth storms up to the ring but Maryse stays put. Wait, Miz attacks Edge at the ramp! But Edge DECKS Miz! Maryse really was lying about Miz being at home! But then Maryse CLOBBERS Beth with her purse! What’s in that bag?! Maryse and Miz decide to show us: it was a BRICK! A literal BRICK! Maryse tosses her hair back and celebrates with The Miz. But will Edge and Beth only look to break The It Couple for that one?

 

The Street Profits are fired up backstage!

Angelo Dawkins & Montez Ford have a dream! The dream is that they have a plan and will execute it and win! The best part is, they do it in Tulsa, Oklahoma~! YESSIR! All the bodies in the ring, it’ll be like a mini Rumble. Which is great cuz the Profits were the first to declare for this year’s Rumble! Their first one, tossin’ bodies! But will Ford throw Dawkins? Rey Mysterio & Dom walk over to say not to worry. They’re a team tonight, and they’ll also be in the Rumble. Rey has to get this off his chest: Los Mysterios will outlast 28 other men in the Rumble. And then, not only will they throw those guys out, they’ll take the Mysterio name back to the Mania main event!

Okay, all due respect, that’s only if the Profits don’t make it there first. Because the Profits are up! And WE WANT THE SMOKE! Will these four burn it down to then light it up on the Road to WrestleMania?

8 Man Tag: The Street Profits & The Mysterios VS Apollo Crews, Commander Azeez & The Dirty Dawgs!

Raw returns and the Dawgs make their entrance. Then the Pride of Nigeria and his right hand man make their entrance. Teams sort out, Dolph Ziggler starts against Dom. They tie up, Dom waistlocks but Ziggler elbows free. Ziggler talks trash, runs, but Dom follows to RANA! Dom runs at Ziggler in the corner but Ziggler CLOBBERS Dom! Tag to Robert Roode and he stomps Dom. Roode drags Dom up, suplexes, but Dom knees free! Dom kicks low, tags Rey, and Rey gets a boost to RANA! Rey whips, Roode reverses but Rey dodges and tilt-o-whirl headscissors! Rey runs in but Roode puts him on the apron. Rey DECKS Roode, climbs, and leaps, but the rana is blocked

Roode brings Rey up, but Rey RANAS Roode out of the ring! Ziggler and Dom get in, Dom whips but Ziggler throws Dom up and out! Ford and Dawkins DROPKCIK Ziggler out! All eight men are on the outside now and shouting, but the ref keeps the peace while Raw goes to break!

Raw returns, Roode tags Ziggler and the Dawgs double whip Rey to double elbow him down. Then the Dawgs hit Rey’s corner to knock everyone down! Fans boo but Ziggler drags Rey over to tag Apollo. Apollo hits a STANDING MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Ziggler is upset on Apollo’s behalf, but Apollo decides he’ll finish it now. Apollo gets Rey up, trophy lifts, but Rey fights free to a DDT! Both men are down and fans fire up! Rey crawls, Dawks is back! Hot tag to the Curse of Greatness! And he rallies on everyone! He hurdles Apollo to hit a FLYING BACK ELBOW! Roode runs into an EXPLODER! Ziggler runs into an EXPLODER!

Dawkins gives Apollo a CYCLONE SPLASH, then the SILENCER! But Azeez gets in to break the cover! Ford returns to ENZIGURI Azeez out! The Dawgs TOSS Ford out! But the Mysterios dropkick the Dawgs onto the ropes! STEREO 619’s! Dom goes up and out to LEAP at Azeez! But Azeez catches him! Rey jumps to add on, the Mysterios take out Azeez! But Apollo rolls Dawkins up! TWO, and pop-up for SKY HIGH! Tag to Ford, he’s up top! FROM THE HEAVENS!! Cover, the Profits & Mysterios win!

Winners: The Street Profits & The Mysterios, by pinfall

Ford was five-star again with that splash, but then the Mysterios decide to dump the Profits out! Rey says that’s nothing personal, just a sample of the Rumble. And then he dumps Dom out! The son’s got a lot to learn still. But will Dom & Rey look to be in that final handful at the Rumble to put their name back on the WrestleMania marquee?

 

WWE looks at the parallels of Lashley and Lesnar.

“Forge: to form by heating and hammering; to beat into shape.” Great warriors are born at the forge, shaped by the heat of the fire and tried in the brutality of combat. This is the beginning of two such warriors. “The great plains often invoke idyllic dreams of an unending cascades of crops and green pastures. But in winter, these dreams are overtaken by the harsh reality of desolation and decay. It is here that the heart of a Beast was forged, and a Conqueror was born.” Brock Lesnar is a two-time NCAA All American with over 100 victories, and the NCAA Division I Heavyweight Champion. And just five months after his WWE debut, The Next Big Thing was WWE Champion.

After ravaging every challenger in the WWE, the Beast would go to the UFC, and in just three fights, he’d reign supreme as the UFC Heavyweight Champion. Then upon returning to the WWE, Lesnar’s path of devastation continued. He took 16-time WWE Champion John Cena to Suplex City, ended The Undertaker’s WrestleMania undefeated streak, and cemented his dominance as a three-time Universal and six-time World Champion. He is a Beast without limits, without remorse, and without fear.

“Discipline. Restraint. Control. It is from these fires that the All Mighty was forged. Son of a US Army drill sergeant, Bobby Lashley learned at an early age that only by rigorously harnessing his natural ability that he would the greatness that he sought.” A three-time NAIA wrestling champion, Lashley would follow his father’s footsteps into the Army, and he honed his craft onto his way to winning gold in the Armed Forces Championship. Lashley would emerge in WWE as a peak physical specimen, unleashing a torrent of physical power and ferocity. But while he won gold, Lashley couldn’t quite find that next level.

A sojourn into MMA ignited the fires and Lashley had a 15-2 record. Then he’d return to the WWE and he would unleash havoc on opponent after opponent with his arsenal of high impact moves, headlined by the Hurt Lock full nelson. He would become United States Champion, Intercontinental Champion, and ultimately, WWE World Champion. Now, Lashley is ready for the one challenge that eluded him. For 20 years, Lashley believes Lesnar was ducking him. But Lesnar is confident that if they’d met before, Lesnar would’ve already beaten him. But the Royal Rumble will see the champion Beast collide with an All Mighty challenger.

These paths have finally crossed. Two warriors, forged in flame, battle and gold, fight for the ultimate prize. Only one emerges THE WWE World Champion. Will the ring even stay standing as these wage war?

 

The Miz & Maryse are heading out.

Kevin Patrick stops them to ask about that vicious attack. Miz says it took ONE SHOT to take down the Glamazon! Now Beth needs medical attention! Now the Grit Couple is the SH- Maryse stops Miz there. The girls are watching at home. Oh, right. Daddy loves ya, girls! And Miz loves Mommy. He is the best husband ever, because he remembered that Maryse’s birthday is next week! So before saying bonny nut- No, no, it’s bonne nuit. The T is silent. Right, bonne nuit to the Grit Couple, Miz is going to throw the most expensive, extravagant and amazing birthday party that anyone has ever seen, because Miz loves Maryse.

Nothing, especially not Edge & Beth, is stronger than their love. These two make-out right in front of us… But will announcing the birthday party here come back to bite the It Couple?

 

Alexa Bliss has another therapy session.

She and her therapist sit quietly a moment before he welcomes her back. He’s happy to say that there are less breakable things here in the office. She isn’t sure about that. But these sessions will continue. He will not tolerate a repeat of last week, though. He does apologize for showing her such a sensitive subject, but he had to know where she stood psychological. He promises her that she will be on the road to recovery. Neat. Now, let’s do word association. Okay, sure. How does she feel about the word, “Trust.” “Lily.” Friend? Lily. Home? Lily. Doll… Lily. Imaginary. Alexa gets up out of her seat and glares at him. Okay, time’s up.

The doc bolts but Alexa cools off. She sits back down, looks around the room, but stays quiet. Will Alexa ever get over her twistedly tragic past?

 

Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Seth Rollins!

The Rocky Mountain Machine is ready to wreck everything, including Brock Lesnar. Meanwhile, The Visionary is preparing to repeat history and defeat Roman Reigns once again. But who will have some major momentum on their side going towards those titanic title matches? The main event of top championship challengers begins after the break!

Raw returns and Rollins makes his entrance. The bell rings and Lashley glares while Rollins smirks. The two circle, fans rally up, and the two tie up. Rollins headlocks, Lashley powers up to power out, but Rollins duck sand dodges. Lashley hurdles then runs Rollins over! Fans cheer as Lashley mocks Rollins’ pose. The two reset, circle and tie up again. Rollins waistlocks, Lashley uses ropes to buck Rollins away, but Rollins hurdles and drops to then go perpendicular, SLINGBLADE! Rollins kicks, reels Lashley in, but Lashley back drops free! Lashley stalks Rollins, but Rollins fights the full nelson! Rollins drops to KICK Lashley, then he dumps Lashley out!

Rollins builds speed to DIVE! Direct hit but Lashley stays up! Rollins goes back in, builds speed again, DIVES, but into a clinch! OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Lashley roars and Rollins flounders while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Rollins has Lashley down now! Rollins drags Lashley to a corner to SLAM a leg against the post! Rollins SLAMS the leg again, talks trash to MVP, then gets in as the ring count reaches 5 of 10. Rollins drags Lashley up, puts the bad leg in the ropes, pulls until the ref counts, then dropkicks the leg! Lashley falls, Rollins drags him to center and steps through to drop a leg on the knee! Lashley snarls and fans rally up. MVP coaches Lashley, but Rollins drops another leg on the bad knee! And then another! Rollins has the toehold, ties up the legs, but Lashley fights, only for Rollins to still get the Indian Deathlock!

Rollins keeps Lashley’s hands away while Lashley endures the hold. Rollins SLAPS Lashley in the side, but Lashley pulls hair! The ref reprimands, Lashley lets go but he punches Rollins! Rollins lets the legs free, but then he gets the bad one for a DRAGON SCREW! And into a HALF CRAB! Lashley endures, even as Rollins sits deep! Lashley powers up, fans rally up, and Lashley turns, only for Rollins to stomp the leg! Rollins has the Half Crab again! MVP coaches Lashley more but Rollins talks trash on “Bob.” Lashley fights up, turns things over, and he boots Rollins away! Rollins falls out of the ring but he’s right back in! Lashley avoids the stomp for a COMPLETE SHOT!

MVP says that’s the All Mighty Lashley he knows! Lashley grits his teeth and pushes up, just as Rollins also sits up. Rollins turns around into an OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! And then another! Lashley runs in at the corner, to RAM into Rollins! Lashley turns Rollins around, NECKBREAKER! Lashley fires up and Tulsa fires up with him! Lashley gets Rollins up, suplexes, but Rollins fights free! Lashley kicks low to gut wrench, DOMINATOR! Cover, TWO!! Rollins survives but MVP coaches Lashley to keep going. Lashley aims from a corner, Rollins rises, Lashley runs in, into a KNEE! Rollins hits a ROLLING ELBOW! Then runs, but into a scoop!

Rollins slips out, shoves Lashley into buckles, then kicks low! Rollins underhooks the arms, PEDIGREE!! Cover, TWO!?! Lashley survives but Rollins is too tired to be shocked! Fans rally behind Lashley but Rollins stands. Rollins goes to a corner, climbs up top, but Lashley gets him with a choke grip! Lashley climbs up, but Rollins fights with elbows! But Lashley clinches, for a SUPER BELLY2BELLY!! Rollins goes flying to the other side of the ring! Lashley gets back to a corner but the Hurt Business go after him!!

Winner: Bobby Lashley, by disqualification

Cedric Alexander & Shelton Benjamin mug Lashley but Lashley fights back! That’s still 2v1, and they POST him! Alexander & Benjamin shout that he’s brought this upon himself, and then the POST Lashley again! They glare at MVP but then drag Lashley back up. But Lashley DOUBLE SUPLEXES them instead! COMPLETE SHOT for Benjamin! Fireman’s carry and the POST for Alexander! Lashley SPEARS Benjamin through barriers! Rollins is shocked at seeing the carnage, but the USOS run out from the crowd! Rollins turns around, into DOUBLE SUPERKICKS! Jimmy & Jey make up for missing the target on SmackDown!

Rollins lost the match and then got got! Will he stand a chance of dethroning the Head of the Table if the Usos can get him on his show? As for Lashley, will he be able to go for the gold if he has his former henchmen coming after him?


My Thoughts:

This was a decent episode, but with really glaring low points. Does Vince just hate Women’s Wrestling again? Why is it that the matches tonight were basically filler to move the story along? Nikki VS Rhea being No Contest was whatever since it at least went with story. But that opening tag match had Becky, Piper, Bianca and Liv, all of which are basically the stars of the Raw Women’s Division. Yet Vince couldn’t be bothered to give that match more than a bathroom break amount of time! I suppose because it was Piper ending it all very quickly, we’re supposed to think Piper is that great, but honestly it just hurt all four women. If Bianca was taken out by just a corner splash, how is she to win the Rumble?

Finn VS Theory 2 was also way too short. I get there was a commercial break in the middle but that just makes it worse. Theory winning was clean also a shame, and not because of Vince’s weird threat to him. I get that Theory needed to win to make a feud out of this, but why not dirty it up a little? When is Finn going to get a chance to comment on how Theory is Vince’s pet project and all that? This whole thing is just hurting my brain. And only a little less than the Veer Mahaan videos coming back. He better show up in the Rumble. And this week’s Alexa therapy session was filler. It was just her associating everything with Lily but not even in a more compelling way than last week’s “triggered Alexa” vignette.

We got a good 8 Man Tag but it was also on the short side. It was pretty standard Rumble season stuff for Rey & Dom to dump the Profits out, but Rey dumping Dom was a bit of a surprise. Maybe Dom will do the same during the Rumble on Rey? I did appreciate them weaving three backstage segments into one, going from Reggie wanting advice from Edge but basically striking out, and then Edge talking with Priest and then Priest talking with Kevin. If Dana still has the 24/7 title come the Women’s Rumble, can that title end up hot potato’d around to end up on someone from SmackDown? Or does Fox just hate that title?

Omos of course destroyed Reggie, but I almost thought he was going to somehow end up 24/7 champion. That’d probably put the end to the title, though, because who would even try to take it from him? Kevin had a very good match with Priest, and his win definitely puts him in line for the US Championship, but who knows if Kevin will even go for it with him so closely connected to Rollins in their stories. And we got a good promo segment out of Maryse and Beth. But Maryse bringing up the Diva Era short matches and yet we got a short women’s match here, the irony clearly goes over Vince’s thick head. That brick in the purse, though. And telegraphing the birthday stuff for next week, Maryse’s cake is definitely going into someone’s face.

The Alpha Academy graduation was a pretty good segment. I am sure Riddle was referencing something but I can’t place it. I can’t believe they’re kayfabing that Otis never had the last name “Dozovic.” That’s taking Vince’s love of editing names to a new, dumber level. But I loved the face Otis made when Gable said they were going to have a tag team academic challenge. He’s going to end up the weak link for his team since this graduation was based on his in-ring skills. The Lesnar Lashley vignette was well made, but a rather melodramatic theme in the narration. After the string of short matches, it just felt like WWE trying too hard to be cinematic and not enough about action.

Lashley VS Rollins was great stuff, until the Hurt Business “ruined” things. It just keeps reminding us of how flippant they’ve been with that faction’s story. They work together against Goldberg but then not together against Lesnar, and now the Hurt Business is just being thrown at Lashley in an attempt to build Lashley as brutal and dominant without it being in the matches. The Usos getting the drop on Rollins was pretty good, though, since that carries over from SmackDown. If they’d let it just be the Usos trying to mess with Rollins, I think things would’ve felt a bit better.

My Score: 8/10


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (1/17/22)

Raleigh gets Elevated!

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AEW Elevation Coverage

A lucky seven for Elevation!

AEW continues in Raleigh and has a strong seven for Elevation! Jay Lethal is keeping himself sharp for what could be an FTW Championship showdown!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Matt Sydal & Lee Moriarty VS JR Miller & Marcus Kross; Sydal & Moriarty wins.
  • Tay Conti VS Ameera; Conti wins.
  • Gunn Club VS JB Cole & T.I.M; Gunn Club wins.
  • Frankie Kazarian VS Labron Kozone; Kaz wins.
  • Ruby Soho VS Kenzie Page; Soho wins.
  • Private Party VS Chase Emory & Patrick Scott; Private Party wins.
  • Jay Lethal VS Alexander Moss; Lethal wins.

QUICK NOTES

Pretty clear cut stuff here, but I like that we’re seeing Sydal & Moriarty in tag action again. Kenzie Page is back in AEW and she’ll give Ruby Soho a good match. Good to see Kaz back in action, they kinda let the ball drop on his Elite Hunter story but maybe he can build himself up towards the TNT Championship. And I have a feeling in Gunn Club’s match, fans will troll Austin & Colten as “Ass Boys” again and that could come close to costing them.


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