Will the Dangerous Tekkers be cheated by the House of Torture?
The IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Champions lead the World Tag League, but that could change in an instant. Will Darkness Fall on Taichi & Zack Sabre Jr?
- World Tag League 2021: Tiger Mask & Yuji Nagata VS Chase Owens & Bad Luck Fale; Chase & Fale win.
- World Tag League 2021: Hirooki Goto & YOSHI-HASHI VS TAKA Michinoku & Minoru Suzuki; Goto & Hashi win.
- World Tag League 2021: Tomoaki Honma & Togi Makabe VS The United Empire; The United Empire wins.
- World Tag League 2021: Satoshi Kojima & Hiroyoshi Tenzan VS SANADA & Tetsuya Naito; LIJ wins.
- World Tag League 2021: Dangerous Tekkers & Yujiro Takahashi & EVIL w/ Dick Togo; Takahashi & Evil win.
- World Tag League 2021: Toru Yano & Hiroshi Tanahashi VS The Guerrillas of Destiny; GoD wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
Here are the current World Tag League Standings!
Dangerous Tekkers: 6-1, 12 points
SANADA & Tetsuya Naito: 5-2, 10 points
Chase Owens & Bad Luck Fale: 5-2, 10 points
Hirooki Goto & YOSHI-HASHI: 5-2, 10 points
The United Empire: 5-2, 10 points
Toru Yano & Hiroshi Tanahashi: 4-3, 8 points
EVIL & Yujiro Takahashi: 4-3, 8 points
Guerrillas of Destiny: 4-3, 8 points
Satoshi Kojima & Hiroyoshi Tenzan: 2-5, 4 points
Yuji Nagata & Tiger Mask: 1-6, 2 points
Tomoaki Honma & Togi Makabe: 1-6, 2 points
Minoru Suzuki & TAKA Michinoku: 0-7, 0 points
World Tag League 2021: Tiger Mask & Yuji Nagata VS Chase Owens & Bad Luck Fale!
Team Blue Justice are on the edge, can they hold on to their long shot? Or will the Crown Jewel & Rogue General take that away as they head for the top?
The teams sort out, Tiger Mask starts against Chase, and the two circle. Chase then sucker punches Nagata, and Fale gets in to go after Tiger! The ref keeps Fale back while Chase whips Nagata into railing! Chase gets back in, tags Fale, and Fale corners Tiger. Fans rally up for Tiger Mask and he dodges Fale. Tiger and Fale circle, Fale rushes in but Tiger dodges again. Tiger leaps to bump shoulders but Fale doesn’t even budge! Fans rally up as Tiger dodges then bails out. But Chase rushes over to throw Tiger back in! Tiger dodges Fale but Chase attacks from behind! Chase CLUBS Tiger, Fale stomps him down. Fale tags Chase back in, Chase stomps Tiger more.
The fans rally as Chase digs his boots in, but he lets off as the ref counts. Chase drags Tiger up but Tiger throws body shots. Chase kicks and CLUBS Tiger down, then hits a KNEE JAMMER! Cover, TWO! Chase clamps on the chinlock and grinds Tiger down. Tiger endures, so Chase lets off to tag in Fale. They put Tiger at the ropes and stand on his back for the Bullet Club “massage!” The ref counts, Bullet Club steps away and salutes. Fale drags Tiger up, throws heavy body shots, then bumps him off Chase’s boot. Tag to Chase, he wrenches and scoops Tiger for a BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Fans rally up, Chase taunts Nagata on the outside, then kicks Tiger around.
Chase drags Tiger up, Tiger throws body shots and kicks! Chase RAMS Tiger into the corner, tag to Fale. Bullet Club mugs Tiger, Fale throws more heavy body shots. Fale has Tiger in the open corner, and starts clubbing away with big forearms! Tiger sits down but Fale stands him back up. Fale gets space but Tiger dodges! Fale hits only buckles, but then Chase traps Tiger in the other corner! Fale runs in to SPLASH! Fale pushes Tiger down then drops the BIG elbow! Cover, TWO! Chase BOOTS Nagata down! Bullet Club drags Tiger Mask back up, waistlock and Fale runs, but Tiger fights free! Tiger dodges, Fale LARIATS Chase down! Tiger drop toeholds and Fale falls onto Chase!
Tiger then steps all over them to tag Nagata in! Nagata BOOTS Fale, ducks his lariat and kicks away at the leg! Nagata whips, Fale reverses but Nagata rolls and feints to dropkick a leg out! Nagata powers up to KICK Fale in the chest! And again! And again! Nagata brings Fale up, wrenches the arm and hits an ELBOW BREAKER! Nagata runs but Fale runs him over! Fans fire up, Fale gets up and hurries over to tag in Chase. Chase walks into body shots and forearms! Nagata whips, Chase reverses and forearm smashes to a short arm LARIAT! Cover, TWO! Chase keeps cool and catches his breath as he brings Nagata up. Nagata fires a forearm, Chase gives it back.
They go back and forth, then Nagata ROCKS Chase! Chase fires off a strike fest! Tiger Mask goes up top, CROSSBODY! Tiger runs at Fale but gets caught! Chase runs in, Tiger ducks and Chase DECKS Fale! Nagata kicks Chase, he and Tiger whip Chase to a corner! Tiger KICKS then Nagata BOOTS! EXPLODER! They get Chase back up, DOUBLE GIRI! Tiger underhooks the arms, TIGER DRIVER! Nagata covers, TWO!! Into NAGATA LOCK II!! Chase endures the crossface, but Fale gets in to stomp Nagata down! BIG ELBOW DROP! Tiger throws Fale out and stomps Chase while fans fire up. Tiger goes to the corner but Fale is after him!
Tiger kicks Fale away, then hops down to CROSSBODY! But Fale catches him and POSTS him! Chase gets up, runs in but into a BOOT! Nagata reels Chase in but Chase fights the saido. Chase tucks the arms but Nagata back drops free! Nagata KICKS Chase, and again! SHI TIGGER! Chase tucks Nagata in, PACKAGE DRIVER! Cover, Bullet Club wins!
Winners: Chase Owens & Bad Luck Fale, by pinfall (gains 2 points; Tiger Mask & Nagata earn 0)
Team Blue Justice is shot down, the Crown Jewel & Rogue General keep on going! Will Bullet Club look to make the tournament finals just Too Sweet?
World Tag League 2021: Hirooki Goto & YOSHI-HASHI VS TAKA Michinoku & Minoru Suzuki!
The Fierce Warrior & Head Hunter are still in the running, and doing far better than the Blue Playmaker & Meanest Man in the World. But will Suzuki-Gun look to be spoilers from here on out?
Suzuki-Gun pounces during introductions! Suzuki throws Goto out while Taka rakes Hashi’s eyes! The bell rings to get this on record as Taka digs his boot into Hashi! Suzuki whips Goto but Goto reverses to send Suzuki into railing! Taka knees Hashi, rakes his eyes again, but the ref reprimands. Hashi blocks a kick, CLUBS the leg, then CHOPS and CLUBS Taka down. Goto gets in, Goto-Hashi double whip and double shoulder Taka down! Then hip toss senton combo! Fans fire up as Hashi brings Taka up and CLUBS him on the back. Hashi ROCKS Taka with forearms, then CHOPS him down! Fans rally as Hashi CLUBS Taka more, then runs, but into Suzuki’s cheap shot!
Suzuki baits Hashi into a HANGING ARMBAR! The ref reprimands but Taka goes after Goto! Suzuki lets Hashi go to drag him out and whips him into railing! Hashi falls in a heap, Suzuki drags him back up to wrap the arm around railing! Suzuki pulls that arm, then pulls Hashi’s hair. Suzuki BOOTS the railing to jam the arm! Meanwhile, Taka is choking Goto! The ref reprimands, Taka stops, but Suzuki gets a chair! Suzuki JAMS Hashi with the chair, then SMACKS him on the back! Fans rally up as Suzuki drags Hashi and wrenches the arm. Suzuki digs the arm into the apron, Taka stands on Hashi’s head! The ref reprimands, Suzuki backs off but Taka bends Hashi’s arm and fingers!
The ref is done with Suzuki and sees Taka. The ref reprimands, Taka lets off and Hashi flops to the floor. Tag to Suzuki, Taka fetches Hashi and puts him in the ring. Suzuki looms over Hashi, drags him up and snapmares for a chinlock. Then Suzuki shifts right to a motorcycle stretch, step over and trapped hammerlock so Suzuki can pull on the other arm. Hashi endures, fights up but Suzuki steps over to keep on the arm. Suzuki twists the wrist, bends fingers, then bends the elbow. Hashi gets a foot for the ropebreak! Taka tags in and stomps Hashi down. Taka wrenches the arm to ELBOW BREAKER!
Taka drags Hashi up to wrench again, move the arm around and ELBOW BREAKER! Taka has Hashi in the ropes, Suzuki kicks at him, then they each pull an arm against the ropes! The ref keeps Goto back while Hashi endures, and then the ref reprimands. Suzuki-Gun lets off, Taka drags Hashi up and Suzuki tags in. Suzuki-Gun mugs Hashi, Suzuki throws a forearm but Hashi throws forearms back. Suzuki wrenches to KICK the arm! Suzuki goes corner to corner and BOOTS Hashi, then snapmares, runs and PENALTY- NO! Hashi blocks the kick! Suzuki throws forearms, whips Hashi, but Hashi dropkicks the leg out!
Fans fire up while both men are down, and Hashi crawls to hot tag Goto! Taka gets in to intercept, and he whips Goto to the corner, only for Goto to rebound and run Taka over! Goto runs at Suzuki in the corner, MURAMASA to BULLDOG! Cover, TWO! Goto grimaces, drags Suzuki up and fireman’s carries but Suzuki fights out to spin Goto and ROCK him with a right! Suzuki brings Goto up to fire more forearms, but Goto forearms back! Suzuki forearms, Goto forearms, repeat, and fans rally up as they pick up speed. Suzuki eggs Goto on, Goto fires off more forearms. Suzuki ROCKS Goto with one, but Goto comes back to ROCK Suzuki!
Goto runs, Suzuki follows and shoots around to SLEEPER! Then spin, but Goto back drops out of the piledriver! Goto deflects the boot to DISCUS LARIAT! Both men are down, fans rally up, hot tag to Hashi! Hashi runs in at Suzuki to CHOP! Then a NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Hashi drags Suzuki up, Suzuki gets Hashi’s arm! Tag to Taka, Suzuki-Gun mugs then double whips Hashi. Taka clotheslines, Suzuki BOOTS! Suzuki ROCKS Hashi with a forearm, then runs, BOOT SUPERKICK COMBO! Cover, Goto breaks it! Suzuki drags Goto up and throws him out, Taka brings Hashi up. Taka goes to scoop but Hashi fights that.
Hashi ROCKS Taka, runs, Taka follows and dodges to get the headlock! Taka drags Hashi down to JUST FACELOCK! Hashi endures, crawls over, and reaches for ropes. Taka rolls him away, gets the arm and La Magistrol! TWO, SHINING WIZARD! Cover, TWO!! Hashi survives but Taka vows to end this! Taka drags Hashi up, scoops, but Hashi fights free. Taka pokes Hashi in the eyes, but runs into a CHOP! Hashi scoops, Taka slips out and feeds to Suzuki’s SLEEPER! Taka runs but Goto DECKS him! Goto gets Suzuki in the fireman’s carry, USHIGOROSHI! Goto fireman’s carries Taka, Taka slips off but Hashi SUPERKICKS him!
Fireman’s carry, SUPERKICK to USHI, but dragon sleeper for the leg lift! SHOUKO!! Cover, Chaos wins!
Winners: Hirooki Goto & Yoshi-Hashi, by pinfall (gain 2 points; Suzuki-Gun earns 0)
Another loss and Suzuki is furious again! Suzuki swings his chair at the railing by commentary! Is there any hope for Suzuki & Taka to get even one win before the end? As for Goto-Hashi, are they just a few wins away from the World Tag League trophies?
World Tag League 2021: Tomoaki Honma & Togi Makabe VS The United Empire!
The Great Bash Heels are another long shot, but they could start that run right here and now! Will the Dominator & Ultimate Weapon crush that revolution before it begins?
The teams sort out, and Henare calls out the Rampaging King Kong. Makabe accepts and the two circle with the bell. Fans rally up as they tie up, and are in a deadlock! Makabe powers Henare back to the ropes, the ref calls for the break, but Henare throws a cheap shot knee! Henare forearms, headlocks, but Makabe powers out. The two ram shoulders but neither falls. Makabe eggs Henare on, Henare runs, they arm shoulders again. Henare fires off forearms, then runs, ducks the clothesline but Makabe runs him over! Makabe drags Henare over, tags in Honma, and GBH double whip to double shoulder Henare down.
Honma stomps Henare, CLUBS him, then scoops and SLAMS! Honma fires up but Khan grabs him at the ropes with an IRON CLAW SLEEPER! Henare DECKS Makabe while the ref reprimands Khan, and Khan gets in to keep on the sleeper. The Empire mugs Honma, Mongolian Chop and buzzsaw! Khan drops knees on Honma’s head! Fans fire up as Khan roars, then Henare covers. TWO, Henare rains down forearms on Honma. The ref saw the closed fist at the end, though! Henare drags Honma up, throws body shots, then KNEES Honma in the corner. Khan holds Honma in place for Henare to throw more body shots. The ref keeps Makabe back, Khan kicks Honma down.
Henare uses a knee to cover, TWO! Fans rally for Honma but Khan tags in. Khan taunts Honma, then sucker punches Makabe! Honma gets up and kicks back but Khan blocks to back elbow. Khan bumps Honma off buckles, then climbs up to sit on Honma’s head! The ref reprimands while Khan taunts Makabe. Khan pulls Honma’s arms back, but lets off as the ref counts. Khan brings Honma around and prepares the claw. Honma rises, fans rally up, and Honma blocks the iron claw! Honma powers Khan back and kicks low to DDT! Khan flounders, fans rally up, and Honma hot tags Makabe!
Makabe rallies on Khan, DECKS Henare, then runs at Khan in the corner to clothesline! Makabe climbs up, rains down fists, and laughs as he gets all 10. Khan blocks the suplex, clubs and knees him, then runs, only to get run over! Cover, TWO! Makabe drags Khan up in a waistlock, but Khan resists the lift and stomps Makabe’s foot. Khan throws Makabe with a drop sayanagi! Fans fire up, Khan hot tags Henare! Henare throws forearms and body shots in the corner, then goes up to rain down punches of his own! Henare gets 10 and laughs, but Makabe carries Henare! Henare fights off to ROCK Makabe. Henare runs, ducks the right but not the LEFT!
Fans fire up and Makabe crawls to his corner, hot tag to Honma! Honma runs and runs Henare over! Fans fire up, Honma CHOPS and CHOPS and CHOPS Henare to a corner! Honma whips corner to corner, runs in and back elbows, then BULLDOGS! Fans fire up with Honma, KOKESHI FLOPS! Khan gets in and drags Honma up, HITSUJIGOROSHI! Henare DECKS Makabe, Khan gives Honma a BACKBREAKER! Khan makes it a rack, Henare STOMPS Honma down! Fans rally up while Henare drags Honma up. Fireman’s carry, and Khan runs, but Makabe gets in to CLOBBER Khan! Henare kicks Makabe and throws body shots.
The Empire mugs Makabe, double whips him, but Makabe breaks through the line, only to get double kicks. The Emipre runs, but Makabe follows, and he DOUBLE CLOTHESLINES them! Honma and Makabe coordinate, CLOTHESLINE SANDWICH for Henare! Ax handle and LARIAT! Honma runs, KOKESHI! Cover, TWO! Henare survives but GBH coordinate again. Makabe whips Henare into the RUNNING HEADBUTT! Cover, Khan breaks it in time! Makabe stomps Khan, throws him out, but Honma brings Henare up. Honma scoops and SLAMS, then goes up the corner as fans fire up! DIVING KOKESHI FLOPS!!
Khan gets in to Mongolian Chop Honma again and again in the corner! Khan whips Honma corner to corner, runs in to clothesline, then Henare runs in to SHINING WIZARD! BOOT ROUNDHOUSE COMBO! Makabe returns but gets caught into HITSUJIGOROSHI! Henare gets the heel hooks! FUBUKI, then MARINE! The Empire fires up and drags Honma up. Fireman’s carry, Khan runs, but Honma slips out and shoves them into each other! Honma catches them for the COMPLETE SHOT DDT COMBO! Fans fire up with Honma as he drags Henare up. BASEMENT KOKESHI!! Cover, TWO!! Henare survives and Honma can’t believe it!
Fans are thunderous as Honma drags Henare up. Henare blocks the suplex, throws body shots, but Honma throws a forearm. Henare ELBOW JABS, but Honma HEADBUTTS! Henare HEEL KICKS and HEADBUTTS! Cover, TWO!! Honma is still in this and fans fire up! Henare powers up and calls to Khan. Henare fireman’s carries, Khan runs, IMPERIAL DROP!! Cover, the Empire wins!
Winner: The United Empire, by pinfall (gains 2 points; Great Bash Heels earn 0)
Another team bites the dust! Will Khan & Henare continue to show the power of the United Empire and take the trophies?
World Tag League 2021: Satoshi Kojima & Hiroyoshi Tenzan VS SANADA & Tetsuya Naito!
TenCozy won’t let their record get them down, they want to make this 30th year a special one! But will it be a Skull End at the hands of Cold Skull & Uncontrollable Charisma? Or do these veterans still got one more run in them?
Naito takes his time with his suit, but Naito taunts Tenzan the bull by shaking his red pants at him. LIJ fist bumps, and Kojima starts against Sanada. They stare down then circle as fans rally up. They tie up, Sanada gets an arm then waistlocks, but Kojima wrenches out. Kojima hammerlocks, headlocks, but Sanada endures the grind. Sanada wrenches out to get the headlock now. Kojima throws body shots, powers out, but Sanada runs him over! Fans fire up as Sanada shows off the dancing pecs. Things speed up, Kojima hip tosses Sanada then runs Sanada over! Kojima shows off the dancing pecs! Sanada gets away to tag in Naito, and he again taunts Tenzna.
Tenzan tags in but then Naito bails out. Tenzan pursues but then Naito gets back in. Naito still taunts Tenzan, Tenzan gets in and Naito attacks! Naito CLUBS Tenzan, then goes back to taunting, then CLUBS him more. Tenzan gets mad but Naito kicks low. Naito runs, but into a headbutt! Tenzan fires off Mongolian Chops! Naito falls and fans fire up, but Sanada gets in, only to get Mongolian Chops! Kojima gets in, he and Tenzan pinball Sanada with forearms and Mongolian Chops until Kojima Mongolian Chops! Kojima throws Sanada out, TenCozy goes after Naito. They CLUB Naito then Kojima scoops and SLAMS!
TenCozy coordinates, but Naito avoids the falling headbutt while Sanada trips Kojima off the apron! Naito drags Tenzan up by his mullet! The ref reprimands, Naito lets go at 4 to have a chinlock. Naito rakes eyes then stalks Tenzan to a corner. Sanada keeps on Kojima on the outside while Naito CLUBS Tenzan! Naito whips Tenzan corner to corner, jump kicks and leg sweeps, COMBINACION CABRON! Naito poses, then uses a knee for a cover, TWO! Naito drags Tenzan up by his hair, tags in Sanada, and Sanada CLUBS Tenzan down. Sanada drags Tenzan up, CLUBS him again, but Tenzan hits Naito! And headbutts! And headbutts again!
Sanada gets Tenzan with a eye rake and throws him down. Sanada stomps Tenzan, drags him up and tags Naito back in. LIJ mugs Tenzan, then Naito CLUBS Tenzan against the ropes. Sanada gets in, LIJ double whip and double back elbow! Then they split the wishbone and double basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Fans rally up, “TEN COZY!” “L I J!” as Naito kicks Tenzan around. Tenzan throws body shots and CHOPS, but Naito rakes eyes! The ref reprimands, Naito steals the Mongolian Chops! And again! Naito gives an wind up, but it’s all to fake Tenzan out so he can kick low! Naito runs but into a WHEEL KICK! Tenzan crawls then rolls, hot tag to Kojima!
Kojima rallies on LIJ, but Naito kicks and whips. Kojima reverses to CLOBBER Naito! Fans fire up with Kojima and he stomps Naito to a corner. Kojima fires off MACHINE GUN CHOPS! Sanada rushes over but he gets added to the MACHINE GUN CHOPS! Kojima CHOPS Sanada down then fires off more MACHINE GUN CHOPS on Naito! Kojima whips Naito corner to corner, runs in and forearm smashes! Kojima shoves Naito down but Sanada kicks and clubs Kojima back. LIJ double whip Kojima to ropes, but he gets around the shove Naito into Sanada! Then kick and DDT for Naito! Kojima powers up and fans rally. Kojima drags Naito up, but Naito blocks the cutter!
Naito throws body shots, then gets a full nelson. Kojima breaks free, switches and full nelsons Naito, but Naito arm-drags free! Naito back elbows Kojima down then adds the basement dropkick! Fans rally up, Naito tags Sanada! Sanada brings Kojima up for forearms, but Kojima kicks back and fires forearms of his own. Kojima spins but Sanada fireman’s carries, only for Kojima to fight free. Kojima swats Sanada’s clothesline to COZY CUTTER! Fans fire up while both men are down, and Kojima gets up, hot tag to Tenzan! Tenzan rallies on LIJ, then Mongolian Chops Sanada to a corner! Tenzan headbutts, CHOPS, then whips corner to corner.
Tenzan runs in to corner clothesline! TENZAN BRAINBUSTER! Cover, TWO! Fans rally while Tenzan stomps Sanada. Sanada gets up, fires forearms but Tenzan gives them back. Fans rally as they go back and forth, but Tenzan headbutts. Sanada blocks the Mongolian Chops to steal the Mongolian Chops! Sanada runs, into the MOUNTAIN BOMB! Kojima intercepts Naito and throws him out. Tenzan covers, TWO! Tenzan gets the ANACONDA VICE! Sanada flails but Naito gets in to stomp Tenzan down. Naito kicks Kojima, then fires off forearms on TenCozy. Naito runs, into TENCOZY CUTTER!
Fans fire up as Kojima stomps Naito outside the ring and Tenzan drags Sanada back up. Tenzan scoops, but Sanada slips out, waistlocks, O’Conner BRIDGE! LIJ wins!
Winners: Sanada & Tetsuya Naito, by pinfall (gain 2 points; TenCozy earns 0)
Los Ingobernables de Japon rebound from last round! And Naito borrows Shingo Takagi’s LIJ towel to still taunt Tenzan. Will LIJ still be able to take World Tag League in a snap as Sanada promised?
World Tag League 2021: Dangerous Tekkers & Yujiro Takahashi & EVIL w/ Dick Togo!
This may not be the main event but it could be the most important match of the night! Taichi & Zack Sabre Jr. lead the block, but that only means they have to be extra careful against the House of Torture. Will Tokyo Pimp & the King of Darkness prove Everything is Evil? Or will they #JustTapOut to the IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Champions?
The Tekkers crowd the House of Torture, but they do have a right to be wary of Dick Togo. Bullet Club Low Sweets, Taichi shows off the dancing pecs, then teams sort out. Yujiro starts against ZSJ, and fans rally up as the two circle. They both go low as they feel out the grapple, and then Yujiro SLAPS ZSJ! ZSJ runs into a corner, Yujiro throws forearms. Yujiro runs to boot but ZSJ blocks to trip Yujiro, spinning toehold and BUTTERFLY DEATHLOCK! ZSJ even stands but Evil grabs ZSJ by the hair. ZSJ grabs Evil’s arm for a hammerlock! ZSJ has the House of Torture tied up all by himself! The ref counts, Taichi throws Dick into the ring!
ZSJ lets go of Yujiro and Evil, and the Tekkers focus on Dick. Dick wants mercy, and even be friends. ZSJ knows he’s lying but he still takes the handshake, to BEND the fingers! Dick taps, gets to ropes, and ZSJ lets him go. Evil checks on Dick but Taichi stomps Yujiro. ZSJ drags Yujiro over, has the toehold, and tags Taichi in. Taichi stomps Yujiro, drags him up and gives him Kowata Kicks. Taichi snapmares and KICKS Yujiro in the back! Yujiro writhes, Taichi drags Yujiro up, but Yujiro BITES Taichi’s hand! The ref reprimands, Yujiro whips Taichi to the corner, and surprise! The blue buckle pad is gone! Taichi hits bare buckles as the Bullet Club special comes into play!
ZSJ rushes in but Yujiro intercepts him with a kick. Yujiro whips ZSJ into the bare buckles! Evil drags ZSJ out to whip him into railing! Then Evil brings Taichi up to RAM into the timekeeper’s area! Abe-san suffers again! Evil gets the mic while Yujiro stomps ZSJ. Evil chokes Taichi and talks trash. Taichi tells him to shut up! Evil lets go, drags Taichi up and puts him in the ring for Yujiro. Yujiro covers, TWO! Fans rally up but the House of Torture argues the count. Yujiro stands Taichi up to knee low, and again. Taichi falls over, Yujiro digs his knee into him at the ropes. Evil digs his heels in, but the ref counts. They let off at 4 and Evil tags in.
Evil drags Yujiro up, throws him out, and then distracts the ref so Dick can DECK Taichi! Dick puts Taichi in and Evil grabs at him. Taichi wants after Dick but Evil stomps Taichi’s leg. Tag to Yujiro, Yujiro drags Taichi back up. Yujiro runs in to BOOT Taichi in the corner! Taichi falls, Yujiro covers, TWO! Fans rally up but Yujiro drags Taichi up to throw knees low. Yujiro forearms Taichi in the corner but Taichi eggs him on. Yujiro CHOPS then whips corner to corner, then runs in to BOOT! Yujiro goes corner to corner again but Taichi boots now! Yujiro comes back but is put in the corner for a GAMANGIRI! Both men are down and fans rally back up! Hot tag to ZSJ!
ZSJ runs in at Yujiro to boot, then runs corner to corner to EuroUpper! ZSJ hammerlocks but Yujiro resists the Northern Lights so ZSJ WRINGS him out! ZSJ then BOOTS Evil and Evil crashes into railing! ZSJ goes back to wrench Yujiro, but Yujiro throws forearms. Yujiro whips, ZSJ reverses to wrench and wrangle Yujiro down. ZSJ STOMPS the arm! ZSJ drags Yujiro up, waistlocks, full nelsons but Yujiro breaks that. ZSJ has the waistlock, ducks the elbow and NORTHERN LIGHTS, float to the KIMURA! Yujiro endures, so ZSJ shifts to an ARMBAR! Yujiro reaches out, ROPEBREAK! ZSJ lets go and fans rally up. ZSJ BOOTS Yujiro, then BOOTS him again.
Yujiro blocks the third kick to throw ZSJ down! Yujiro runs but ZSJ avoids the basement dropkick, only for Yujiro to block the Penalty Kick! Yujiro fireman’s carries but ZSJ slips out to GUILLOTINE! Yujiro endures, and BITES the hand! Yujiro reels ZSJ in, but ZSJ fights the fisherman to PELE the arm! ZSJ wrenches to an ELBOW BREAKER, then wrenches again, but Yujiro reels him in for an INCOLLE SLAM! Tag to Evil and he stands on ZSJ’s head. Evil scuffs ZSJ then drags him up. ZSJ kicks but Evil blocks, gives it to the ref, but ZSJ catches the kick for an ANKLE LOCK! Evil endures, hops around, and claws ZSJ’s eyes! The ref reprimands, Evil stops to run, but into a boot!
Evil ducks the high kick but ZSJ sweeps the legs! Fans fire up as ZSJ crawls over, hot tag to Taichi! Taichi scowls as he drags Evil up but Evil rakes Taichi’s eyes! Taichi CHOKES Evil! The ref reprimands, Yujiro pulls hair, so Taichi CHOKES Yujiro! The ref reprimands again, Taichi lets go of Yujiro to choke Evil! Taichi drives Evil down, lets off as the ref reprimands, then CHOKES Dick on the apron! Fans fire up as Taichi takes care of the distraction. Taichi drags Evil up, and whips him to the bare corner! The Bullet Club special bites Evil in the butt! Taichi wrenches Evil’s arm to DANGEROUS HOOK KICK! Fans fire up as Taichi wants Evil to rise.
Evil sits up, ducks the buzzsaw but Taichi elbows the waistlock away. Taichi runs but Yujiro and his pimp cane are there! Evil waistlocks but Taichi resists the lift to PELE Evil in the back! Fans fire up again as Taichi rises. Taichi runs, Evil grabs the ref and Dick trips Taichi up! Yujiro BOOTS ZSJ down, he and Evil get Taichi in the corner. They double whip corner to corner,Yujiro runs in to BOOT! Evil runs in to clothesline! Evil brings Taichi out, FISHERMAN BUSTER! Cover, TWO! Evil grows frustrated but the fans rally for Taichi. ZSJ whips Yujiro into railing! Evil fireman’s carries but Taichi fights free to get the arms!
ZSJ gets in, DRAGON SCREW! And then DRAGON SCREW the other way! Fans fire up as ZSJ PENALTY KICKS Evil down, then sits him up for the BUZZSAW! Taichi covers, Yujiro breaks it! ZSJ wrenches to PELE Yujiro’s arm, AX BOMBER takes him down! Fans fire up for the Tekkers as they go after Evil. Taichi drags Evil up, Evil goes for the eyes but Taichi choke grips first! ZSJ joins in, CHOKE SLAM BACK SUPLEX! Cover, TWO!! Evil survives but the Tekkers keep focus. OFF COME THE PANTS! Taichi aims, but Dick grabs a leg! Evil fights ZSJ off then shoves him into Taichi! Evil shoves the ref to LOW- NO! ZSJ traps the arm with his legs and TWISTS!
Fans fire up but Yujiro gets in. ZSJ blocks his low blow, too, for another ARM TWIST! ZSJ gets Yujiro for a cobra twist, Taichi gets Evil for SEITEIJYUJIRYOU!! The House of Torture endures stereo submissions, and Taichi cranks way back on the stretch plum! Evil endures, then pushes the ref down! Yujiro grabs the ref, so that he doesn’t see Evil tapping out!! And Dick SPOILER CHOKERS ZSJ!! ZSJ lets Yujiro go and then Yujiro CLUBS Taichi! Evil is free, Yujiro mule kicks then SUPERKICKS Taichi! Yujiro sits Taichi back up, PIMP- NO! Taichi fights free, but Yujiro BOOTS! Taichi fires up to three point stance and RUNNING FOREARM!
Fans fire up and Taichi aims from the corner. Evil gets up, Taichi sets up in the three point stance again, but Evil LAUNCHES the ref at Taichi! Taichi gets clear, but runs into EVERYTHING- NO! Taichi slips out to DANGEROUS SAIDO!! But the ref is down, the cover isn’t being counted! Again, the Tekkers would’ve won this! SPOILER CHOKER!! But Taichi fights up! Only for Dick to squeeze tighter! Feed to EVERYTHING IS EVIL!! Cover, House of Torture wins!!
Winners: Yujiro Takahashi & Evil, by pinfall (gain 2 points; Dangerous Tekkers earn 0)
The champions fall to the treachery of the House of Torture! Dick shoves ZSJ in and drags him up, so Evil can BELT SHOT with his NEVER Openweight Six Man title! Then they grab the IWGP Heavyweight Tag belts and hold them up. Will this be the reality we see in the near future?
World Tag League 2021: Toru Yano & Hiroshi Tanahashi VS The Guerrillas of Destiny!
The Joker & The Ace are just on the outside, same as the Good Bad Guy & Silverback, and both teams lost just last round. Who rebounds from bad luck in round seven to be great in round 8?
Tama Tonga and Tanga Loa have done their hair up in Mohawks to mock the pompadours on Yano & Tanahashi. Tama wants Red Shoes to be very careful with his hawk, too. Bullet Club Low Sweets, Tanahashi shoves off the muscles and Yano says, “SUGOI~!” The teams sort out, Yano & Tanahashi squat while Tama & Loa strike poses. And then GoD attack! The bell rings as GoD CLUBS Yano & Tanahashi, then Loa messes up Tanahashi’s hair! GoD whip Yano & Tanahashi but they both hold ropes to taunt back. They then both dodge and SLAP GoD on the head! GoD rush in, Yano & Tanahashi get around to waistlock and then shove them into each other!
Yano throws Tama out, then he and Tanahashi double whip Loa to double shoulder him down! Fans fire up and Yano does his best to get his pompadour back. Yano & Tanahashi go out, Yano CLUBS Tama then bumps him off the apron. Tanahashi CLUBS Loa and brings him around. Yano whips Tama but Tama reverses to send Yano into railing! Loa does the same to Tanahashi on the other side! Tama stomps Yano, Loa stomps Tanahashi! Loa RAMS Tanahashi into railing, Tama leaves Yano behind. Red Shoes starts a ring count, Loa drags Tanahashi up and the Guerrillas mug him. The count is 15 of 20, Loa puts Tanahashi in and fans cheer. Cover, TWO!
Loa drags Tanahashi up, tags Tama in, and Loa snapmares Tanahashi for Tama’s slingshot senton! Tama makes sure his hawk is still up, then he tags Loa back in. Loa drags Tanahashi up as fans rally. Tanahashi fires off body shots but Loa headbutts! Loa brings Tanahashi up to scoop, but Tanahashi fights free and shoves Loa into the corner! Loa turns around, Tanahashi dropkicks the leg out! Fans rally up, hot tag to Yano! Yano has Red Shoes move aside so he can untie a buckle pad. Loa runs in but Yano dodges so Loa hits buckles! Tama gets in but Yano throws the pad at him. Red Shoes wants to confiscate the buckle pad but Tama won’t let him.
Tama shoves Red Shoes down, Yano grabs Tama by the hair! Loa grabs Yano by the hair! Loa whips Yano into Tama’s PAD SMACK! Tama SMACKS Tanahashi, too! Tama stomps Yano while making sure his hawk is good. Loa goes after Tanahashi on the outside, fans rally up, and Yano goes to the apron. Loa brings Yano down and stomps him on the floor. Loa steps on Yano, drags him back up and puts him in the ring. Loa drags Yano up, then RAMS him into the corner! Loa RAMS his shoulder in again and again then lets off to tag Tama. Tama punches Yano down, then talks trash to Tanahashi. Tama drags Yano up as fans rally.
Tama CLUBS Yano, drags him up, and snapmares to then CLUB away on Yano’s chest! Tama warns Tanahashi, then sucker punches him anyway! Tama rains down fists on Yano, then chokes him! Red Shoes reprimands, Tama lets off. Tama brings Yano up in a corner to punch him down again. Red Shoes reprimands about the closed fist so Tama stomps away on Yano instead! Tama lets off and takes off the vest! Tama fires up and fans rally as he runs in, STINGER SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Fans rally, Tama warns Tanahashi but Yano grabs Tama’s hair! Tama breaks free, but Yano grabs hair with the other hand! And again, and again, until Tama pulls Yano’s hair!
Tama CLUBS Yano, fixes his hawk then whips, but Yano reverse to throw Tama down by the hawk! Fans fire up, Tama’s hawk is lopsided, hot tag to Tanahashi! Tanahashi fires off fast hands, whips but Tama reverses, only for Tanahashi to FLYING FOREARM! Tanahashi DECKS Loa, scoops Tama and SLAMS him down! Fans fire up as Tanahashi goes up but Loa goes after Tanahashi with forearms! Loa brings Tanahashi down to CLUB him, then GoD regroups. They double whip Tanahashi to ropes but he kicks Tama down! Tanahashi blocks Loa’s kick to DRAGON SCREW! Then he blocks Tama’s kick to DRAGON SCREW!
Tanahashi gets the legs, ties them up, and he turns Tama for the TEXAS CLOVERLEAF! Tama endures, crawls, and gets the ROPEBREAK! Tanahashi lets go, stomps Tama, and fans fire up as Tanahashi runs. But Tama avoids the slingblade, only for Tanahashi to avoid the super punch! Tanahashi fires off fast hands, runs, but into Tama’s DROPKICK! Tama crawls, hot tag to Loa! Loa runs in at Tanahashi in the corner to clothesline! Loa then whips Tanahashi into bare buckles and adds another clothesline! EXPLODER! Cover, TWO! Fans rally up, “Let’s Go, Ace!” Loa drags Tanahashi up, suplexes, but Tanahashi fights to TWIST ‘N’ SHOUT!
Fans fire up more as Tanahashi and Loa are down again! Hot tag to Yano! Yano brings Loa up, whips him, but Loa reverses! Yano stops from hitting bare buckles, but Loa kicks him and whips him to ropes. Yano holds ropes to taunt Loa, then he dodges Loa to clinch and BELLY2BELLY! Fans fire up, Yano brings Loa back up. Loa headbutts low then runs, but Yano atomic drops to a trip! Yano catapults Loa into Tama! Tanahashi gets in, they double whip Loa to a corner, Tanahashi runs in to splash! Yano runs in to back elbow! Yano shoves Loa, Tanahashi fires up and runs, but Loa avoids slingblade to shove Tanahashi into Yano! Loa fires off kicks and an ENZIGURI!
Tanahashi falls, Loa gets up but Yano kicks him back. Yano runs, Tama gets in, body shot, uppercut and NECKBREAKER! GoD gets Yano up, NIGHTFALL! Cover, TWO!! Yano survives and fans fire up! Jado calls the shot, Loa gets Yano back up. Feed to Tama, MAGIC- No! Tanahashi kicks Loa down then fires off forearms on them both! Loa kicks, Tanahashi blocks, but Tama grabs Tanahashi! Loa gets the legs, TONGAN TWIST! Tanahashi flops out of the ring, Loa drags Yano back up. Feed to Tama but Yano gets around to shove Tama at Loa! Tama bounces off Loa’s shoulder, Yano ducks Loa’s clothesline to drag him down, M U!!
TWO, Yano shoves Red Shoes at Loa but Loa moves Red Shoes aside, Yano LOW BLOWS! Roll up, TWO!! Loa escapes and Yano argues with Red Shoes! Tama gets in, Yano turns around into GUN STUN!! Tama helps Loa up, Jado wants to see it! GoD get Yano up, MAGIC KILLER!! Cover, GoD wins!!
Winners: Guerrillas of Destiny, by pinfall (gain 2 points; Yano & Tanahashi earn 0)
The Ace & The Joker fall again, but they’re still not out of the running! Can they recover and be just fine in round nine? As for GoD, they get the mics and Loa starts. “Oh, Yamanashi. Just a quick reminder of who we are. We are the seven-time tag team heavyweight champions. We were the 2020 World Tag League champions. Do not forget that. This year, we will repeat as World Tag League champions. And if you already know, we are G O suck on that mother… D!”
Tama takes the mic now to say, “Hey, champion.” He’s calling out Shingo Takagi, and says, partially in Japanese, “This is Bullet Club Nation! We are the greatest tag team in NJPW! And this year, World Tag League 2021 will be ours because we are the Guerrillas of Destiny!” Low Sweet to top it off, will Tama & Loa go back-to-back to take the Heavyweight Tag Division back?
Here are the NEW World Tag League Standings!
Dangerous Tekkers: 6-2, 12 points
SANADA & Tetsuya Naito: 6-2, 12 points
Chase Owens & Bad Luck Fale: 6-2, 12 points
Hirooki Goto & YOSHI-HASHI: 6-2, 12 points
The United Empire: 6-2, 12 points
EVIL & Yujiro Takahashi: 5-3, 10 points
Guerrillas of Destiny: 5-3, 10 points
Toru Yano & Hiroshi Tanahashi: 4-4, 8 points
Satoshi Kojima & Hiroyoshi Tenzan: 2-6, 4 points [ELIMINATED]
Yuji Nagata & Tiger Mask: 1-7, 2 points [ELIMINATED]
Tomoaki Honma & Togi Makabe: 1-7, 2 points [ELIMINATED]
Minoru Suzuki & TAKA Michinoku: 0-8, 0 points [ELIMINATED]
A great round, but pretty clear that the bottom four would be mathematically eliminated here. I can see why Yano & Tanahashi VS Guerrillas were the main event and not the Tekkers. Both Yano-Tanahashi and GoD were 4-3 here, this puts GoD up and just on the outside of things while The Ace & The Joker are the next ones on the bubble. I thought we were going to get a bit more out of Yano & Tanahashi but I suppose they’re here to give good matches for the other contenders. Should’ve figured House of Torture would cheat the Tekkers, they’re also just on the outside. That is quite the block at 6-2, this could still be anyone’s tournament.
My Score: 8.8/10
Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (1/17/22)
Is Becky Lynch sweatin’ Doudrop?
The Man prepares for the Royal Rumble!
“Doudrop” Piper Niven is coming for the Raw Women’s Championship, and she won’t be Manhandled so easily! How will Becky Lynch counter Piper’s power?
- Bianca Belair & Liv Morgan VS “Doudrop” Piper Niven & Becky Lynch; Piper & Becky win.
- Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens; Kevin wins.
- Finn Balor VS Austin Theory; Theory wins.
- Nikki A.S.H. VS Rhea Ripley; No Contest.
- Reggie w/ Dana Brooke VS Omos; Omos wins.
- 8 Man Tag: The Street Profits & The Mysterios VS Apollo Crews, Commander Azeez & The Dirty Dawgs; The Street Profits & Mysterios win.
- Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Seth Rollins; Lashley wins, by disqualification.
PLAY BY PLAY
Becky Lynch heads to the ring!
Tulsa, Oklahoma, The Man has come ’round! Fans chant her name as she gets the mic, and she welcomes them to the Big Time! “Now we are less than two weeks away from the Royal Rumble, and the Raw Women’s Division has never been hotter. And whether you like to admit it or not, there’s only one person responsible for that, and that’s me.” Becky says it is so hot that there are stars from generations past, like Lita, Mickie James and the Bella Twins, all hoping that they can win the Rumble and challenge the #VanGOAT at WrestleMania. Face it, they need Becky because she makes stars.
Look no further than Doudrop. Becky has kindly given her the biggest opportunity of her life, a taste of the Big Time at one of the biggest events of the year. The people didn’t get her that! Piper Niven didn’t get it for herself. Becky did that! That is what Becky does! She makes people better, than she beats ’em! But Becky will admit that she admires Piper’s tenacity. She came from the rolling hills of Scotland and made a name for herself. Well no, someone else had to make up a name for her. So Becky will shoot it straight for “Doudou.” A doudrop will never be champion so long as The Man is still here.
But speaking of, here she comes! Piper storms right up to the ring, gets herself a mic and says she’s gonna tell Becky something. “You didn’t get me anything. I got myself this title match at Royal Rumble. But if it was really your plan to face me instead of Bianca, than it’s the biggest mistake you’ve ever made. Just make sure you stay well out of my way tonight.” Becky says she did get Piper that win last week, and if Piper just follows her lead, they’ll get a win here tonight. But here comes Bianca Belair! “Oh, Becky. You really out here spittin’ all this nonsense about being the GOAT, the greatEST of all time, but let me remind y’all that you can’t spell greatest without E S T.”
Bianca joins Piper and Becky in the ring as fans chant for “EST! EST!” Bianca reminds us SHE is the EST of WWE. And Doudrop, uh, okay. The only reason Piper is facing Becky is because Ms. Big Time was so scared of Bianca, she interfered in last week’s match. But girl, uh-uh. That’s just buyin’ time. Because Bianca is officially entering the Royal Rumble match! And it’s gonna be every woman for themselves, so if Bianca’s gotta throw out every 29 other women like she did last year, she’ll do it. Then she’ll go main event WrestleMania… again. And Bianca can go after whichever champion she wants, which could be Becky or Piper.
But now, Bianca’s tag partner, Liv Morgan, arrives! “Well, well, well, Bianca. We may be tag teaming tonight, but I am also officially entering myself in the Royal Rumble match. And that’s not all, that’s not all. Because in two weeks, I’m also the one winning it.” But that means Bianca will be one of the 29 she outlasts on the way to WrestleMania. But since we’re on the same page- Piper pretends to snore and then says this is boring. Everyone, shut up and ref, get in here! Piper wants to fight, but it’s Becky who riles up Liv and Bianca, and then uses Piper as a shield! Piper welcomes someone to bring it, but this starts after the break.
Chad Gable prepares a speech.
“Greetings and salutations…” Otis walks over, the valedictorian of The Alpha Academy. Will this graduation ceremony go off without a hitch?
Bianca Belair & Liv Morgan VS “Doudrop” Piper Niven & Becky Lynch!
Raw returns and the bell rings, and Bianca dropkicks Piper! Piper stays up but Bianca whips. Piper blocks, reverses, but Bianca goes up tot ell Piper to kiss this. Then Bianca leaps over Piper, spins her around and reels her in, but Piper blocks the suplex. Piper suplexes, Bianca slips out and then dodges in the corner! Piper hits buckles, Bianca ROCKS Piper with a forearm, then runs in to ram Piper. Piper rebounds to run Bianca over! Piper runs, Becky tags in! Piper is annoyed with Becky but Becky says she’s got this. They argue, Becky turns around into a dropkick! Bianca kips up, tags Liv, Liv dodges Becky to DECK Piper and SHOTGUN Becky!
Becky is in a corner, Liv back body blocks, then SHINING WIZARDS! Liv whips, Becky reverses but Liv stops to back elbow. Liv goes up to leap and missile dropkick Becky down! Liv then brings Becky around, springboard CODE BREAKER! Cover, Piper breaks it! Bianca gets in to ROCK Piper, but she can’t lift Piper for the torture rack. Piper shoves Bianca into a corner and SPLASHES! Piper runs at Liv but Liv sends her out! Becky rolls Liv up, has feet on the ropes, TWO! Liv kicks low, KICKS again, then runs in, but Becky dodges! Liv elbows Becky again, but runs into a MANHANDLE SLAM! Cover, Piper breaks it?! But that was her own teammate!
Piper drags Becky out of the way, wants to cover, but she’s not legal! So Piper hurries back to her corner, tags herself in, and then runs to SPLASH Liv! Cover, Piper and Becky win!
Winners: “Doudrop” Piper Niven & Becky Lynch, by pinfall
Then Piper celebrates by giving Becky a VADER SEATED SENTON! Piper laughs as she looms over Becky, but will she have the last laugh at the Rumble?
Reggie and Dana Brooke talk with someone.
Reggie knows they’ve faced giants in their career, so can they give Reggie any advice when facing Omos tonight? The person he’s talking to is Edge! Edge thinks, and he tells Reggie that he can do things Edge can’t even comprehend. So he has a chance? Hell no! Beth Phoenix scolds Edge with a smack, and Edge says he still wishes Reggie luck. And Beth talks with Dana real quick. She’s seen Dana bust her butt for years here, so it’s so great Dana has a title. Dana thanks Beth for that, and hurries away to keep up with Reggie. Edge and Beth then see Damian Priest. They shake hands and hug and Priest is happy to see the Grit Couple.
Edge says he likes what he sees with Priest’s other side. Yeah, Priest’s other side is a bit edgy, but being serious here, Priest wants some ideas on the Rumble match. Edge has experience, having won two, one of which he won from starting first. There’s no better man to ask for pointers than Edge. Well cardio is one thing, but the main thing is to keep doing you. Priest’s style is working. Someone brings over a note for Beth, and it’s from Maryse. She wants to meet Beth 1v1, woman to woman. Edge says that’s suspicious. Beth is of course going to go but Edge is going to go with her. Beth agrees, and Edge says he and Priest can talk more later. What will the It Couple have planned for the Grit Couple?
Kevin Owens then walks over to ask Priest something. Kevin is looking forward to their match tonight. Really? Yeah, no lie! He’s looking- Oh, right, because Kevin’s so honest. Yes, especially having a good, clean match. Good competition, show off some technical prowess. But also that side, that nutso, vicious side. That side shouldn’t come out. Kevin is just hoping for them having a good, clean match. Kevin also has an announcement to make, so see you then. Good talk. Kevin and his tie hurries off, but will Priest keep Damian from tearing into the Prizefighter?
Kevin heads to the ring!
The KO Show is back, and tonight’s guest is Seth Freakin’ Rollins! What will Kevin ask his new best buddy? We find out, after the break.
Raw returns and Kevin welcomes us to his show. He wishes he could say it’s good to be here in Tulsa, but that would be a vile lie because this place is brutal. Don’t get mad at him telling the truth! And another truth is that Kevin has a very special guest. He is a man Kevin is proud to call his best friend, and after this man beats Roman Reigns at the Royal Rumble like he has in a plethora of matches before, he will be called the Universal Champion. Please welcome Seth! FRRRRREAKIN’! ROLLINS~! Rollins makes his way out to the ring, fired up as always, but especially now after having evaded a Bloodline beatdown on SmackDown last Friday.
Rollins takes up a mic and Kevin lets Rollins decide if they sit or stand. Rollins wants to stand, so he and Kevin kick the chairs aside. Kevin thanks Rollins for accepting his invitation to be a guest. Kevin wants to tell Rollins that he admires Rollins so much. There is so much Kevin admires about Rollins. From the great suits, like this striped one. He looks like a million bucks! MAHVELOUS! And even more so, Kevin admires Rollins’ courage. Do people realize how much guts it took for Rollins to show up on SmackDown, into the lion’s den, get face to face with Roman, and berate him into realizing that “The Head of the Table” is only possible because Rollins set the table.
“Yes, yes, yes! Kev, you hit the nail on the head right there!” Friday got a little testy, but the truth is, Roman’s rattled. Roman’s nervous, and dare Rollins say, Roman is scared. He’s scared! You heard it here first! Roman took the low road taking shots at Rollins’ family, sending the Usos after him. But everyone saw that the Usos couldn’t get the job done. Rollins says Roman is playing checkers while Rollins is playing chess! If Roman keeps this up, winning at the Rumble will be like taking candy from a baby. A little baby Roman! And Rollins will turn the title from blue to red and bring the Universal Championship back to their show, Monday Night Raw!
That’s huge! When Rollins wins, he’s staying on Raw with Kevin! Yes, 100%! Incredible! Then that means Raw has the best champion! Raw wouldn’t need Lesnar or Lashley, they’d have Rollins! Kevin again hits the nail on the head. Get rid of Lesnar. Rollins has a match with Lashley tonight, they can get rid of Lashley tonight! Who knows? Kevin likes the sound of that. But he has something of his own to announce and it is “earth shattering.” It will change the face of the industry! Right here and now, Kevin is officially declaring for the Royal Rumble! Rollins says that IS earth shattering!
Kevin will win the Rumble, Rollins will beat Roman, and the WWE Universe will get the match they… well, not deserve. But they’ll get the biggest Mania main-event ever! SETH FREAKIN’ ROLLINS VS KEVIN FREAKIN’ OWENS! Rollins likes where Kevin’s head is at. But here comes Damian Priest! Rollins says this is his time and Kevin’s show! If Priest steps any closer, Kevin will kick his ass! Kevin wants Rollins to stop but Priest tells Rollins to shut up! They’re both delusional idiots! There is not one person on this planet that believes Rollins will win at the Rumble. And Kevin is just a liar, so he isn’t winning, either.
And if Kevin doesn’t want to see Damian, then don’t wake him up. Oh and by the way, Priest talked with Pearce and Sonya. Their match tonight? That starts NOW! Kevin is freaking out, but Rollins tries to encourage him. Will it not matter when the Archer of Infamy takes aim?
In the animal kingdom, the lion bides its time as it hunts its prey. Step by step, until it finally strikes, leaving only scraps for the hyenas. When will the Million Dollar Arm finally strike?
Damian Priest VS Kevin Owens!
Raw returns and the bell rings. They tie up, Kevin waistlocks, but Priest pries free to wrench to a wristlock. Kevin rolls, headlocks, but Priest uses a chinbar to push Kevin back and power out. Kevin rams Priest, but then Kevin apologizes, Things speed up, Priest runs Kevin over with a shoulder! Priest runs in at the corner, but Kevin puts him on the apron! Kevin elbows Priest away, but Priest ROUNDHOUSES back! Priest steps in but into a SHOTGUN! Kevin stomps Priest at the ropes, lets off as the ref counts, then drags Priest to center for a SENTON! Kevin wraps on a chinlock and leans on Priest but fans rally up.
Priest fights up, priest the hold open but Kevin CLUBS him on the back. Kevin CHOPS, whips, but Priest reverses. Kevin KCISK back, CHOPS again, and CHOPS! Priest snarls, but Kevin apologizes again. This is just good, clean wrestling! Priest cools off, but then he fires off fast hands! WHEEL KICK! Kevin goes to a corner, Priest runs in but Kevin bails out. Fans boo, Priest keeps cool, but then Priest goes out the side. Priest runs in around the way, leaps off the steps, into a SUPERKICK! Kevin gets back in the ring to refresh the count, then FROG SPLASHES off the apron! Kevin roars while Priest sputters! Kevin drags Priest up and in as Raw goes to break.
Raw returns again and Priest CLOBBERS Kevin! Fans fire up as Priest aims from a corner, and Priest throws haymakers! Priest fires off KICK after KICK, then a ROLLING ELBOW! Kevin rebounds, into a FLAPJACK! Priest runs at Kevin in the corner, for a big back elbow! Priest reels Kevin in, but Kevin wrenches out to ROCK Priest! Kevin whips, Priest rebounds to LARIAT! Priest gets Kevin up for the BROKEN ARROW! Cover, TWO! Priest is annoyed but he drags Kevin up. Priest ROCKS Kevin with a right, hoists him up top in the corner and ROCKS him again! Priest climbs up, but Kevin hits back!
Priest and Kevin brawl, Priest gets the edge. Priest brings Kevin up, but Kevin blocks the superplex! Kevin throws body shots, and even a headbutt! Kevin headbutts again, Priest falls down! Kevin adjusts, SWANTON BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Priest survives and Kevin thinks of what he has to do now. Kevin aims, kicks but no stunner! Kevin ducks the heel kick, tries gain, but Priest dragon sleepers! But Kevin slips free to pop Priest up, SIT-OUT POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO!! Priest survives again and Kevin is shocked! Fans rally up, Kevin aims, kicks, but Priest blocks to spin and ROUNDHOUSE! Kevin wobbles into a choke grip, SOUTH OF HEAVEN CHOKE SLAM! Cover, TWO!!
Priest is shocked that Kevin survives! Kevin rolls away to a corner but Priest follows. Priest throws hands, whips Kevin corner to corner, but Kevin falls, clutching his leg. The ref checks on Kevin, Kevin flounders up saying it’s cramping up. The ref wants a medic to check this, fans boo but Priest isn’t sure what to make of this. But then Kevin suckers him in for a STUNNER!! Cover, Kevin wins!
Winner: Kevin Owens, by pinfall
Priest was right about Kevin being a liar! But now, Kevin could also be a contender! Will Kevin add the US Championship to his Road to WrestleMania?
Backstage interview with Nikki A.S.H.
What is her plan heading into tonight’s match with former tag partner, Rhea Ripley? Nikki tells Sarah that this is no different than any other match. It is clear to Nikki now that she stands on her own, and she couldn’t feel any better. Rhea should be down and out, completely mortified after being proven the friend Nikki didn’t think she was. But Nikki, you were the one who attacked Rhea- Sarah, you need to get your facts straight! Rhea is the one who broke up the team. Rhea is the one who decided to take their friendship and flush it! She is the villain, not Nikki! And Nikki is the closest thing that the people of Tulsa will ever have to a real hero. She will be the People’s Hero.
And sometimes, heroes have to do things that regular people don’t understand. After tonight, Rhea will realize that she needs a superhero, whether she likes it or not. Nikki strikes her superhero pose and walks away, but will Rhea’s brutality smack some sense into her?
The Alpha Academy heads to the ring.
Pomp & Circumstance plays because today is Otis’ graduation! Will the NEW Raw Tag Team Champions be celebrating on top of their big title victory from last week?
Raw returns and Gable is at the podium. “Greetings and salutations my fellow colleagues and… Oh who am I kidding? I don’t have any colleagues here, considering I’m an Olympian with a Master’s Degree that did it with an immaculate 4.0 GPA! Thank you! Don’t do that. Don’t boo education. That’s gross, everybody.” But it makes sense, since the odds of anyone in Oklahoma having a Master’s, let alone graduating high school, are slim to none! Now shoosh! Tonight is about celebrating. Not just an institution but an individual. Gable could go on and on about himself, because his list is long.
But tonight is about a man who overcame the odds. An absolute tree trunk in the ring and a great student in the classroom. Gable’s prized pupil, his protégé, his number one guy, OTIS! Gable’s so proud. Last week, Otis applied the lessons and passed his final exam by decimating the moronic RKBRO and claimed the Academy’s rightful spot as tag team champions! So tonight, it is Gable’s honor and pleasure- Fans chant with “RKBRO! RKBRO!” They’re trying to have a ceremony for Otis! Gable presents to Otis, who has no last name anymore, the highest graduating honors from the Alpha Academy! The music plays again as they hug it out.
Gable says Otis has the floor. Look at that face! Otis thanks Chad, and says Gable has helped him reach his full potential. But now he has a warning: expect pure carnage for anyone who messes with the titles! They ain’t stopping, and they ain’t ever gonna stop! But here comes Matt Riddle! The Bro is in his own graduation gown, but it has mismatched sleeves… Riddle asks, “What’s up, bros? Big O, you’re looking pretty, pretty tight. And you guys don’t even wanna know what I had to get this graduation gown on time.” But when he got invited to this ceremony, he knew he had to make a very special speech.
Riddle brings out his speech, written on a napkin from this morning’s breakfast buffet. “Fellow graduates and Tulsinians. IT felt like just last week, Randy and I were the WWE Raw Tag Team Champions. We were livin’ on the edge, drivin’ with the top down, lettin’ the wind blow through our hair. We were just a couple o’ young, wild stallions runnin’ free. But today is graduation day. And our lives will change forever. Randy would always say, ‘Life comes at ya pretty fast.'” Gable stops him there, he has no idea what he’s going on about. Riddle was NOT invited to this. And Oklahoma can’t afford to lose another braincell, so just be on your way.
Riddle has “Gablestiltskin” take it easy. Riddle wants to say how proud he is of them. Them and their astronomical necks. See? He can use big words, too, Chad! Gable says Riddle is an idiot. He already ruined Otis’ night, so get to the point. RKBRO wants a rematch? Problem is, Riddle probably can’t even define the word rematch. Riddle so can! A rematch is… uh… when you have to light something up twice! Like a candle! But hey, a rematch sounds like a pretty sick idea. Fans wanna see it! Gable knew it. No wonder Orton left Riddle high and dry. Where even is he? Riddle unzips his gown to show off his “Hey Raaaandy” shirt.
Gable and Otis will give them a rematch, under one condition: they have to prove their mental aptitude in an Alpha Academy Academic Challenge! Otis suddenly looks worried. TO spell it out, it’s Riddle & Randy VS the Academy to prove the smarter team! Because we already saw who the physically dominant team is! Whoa, an academic challenge? Like Billy Madison? Or more like Wheel of Fortune? Riddle loves spinning that wheel, and maybe he and Otis could run in a giant hamster wheel. Gable kinda looks like a jacked hamster, but with three times the brains. Otis is furious and throws off his gown! Riddle wants Otis to back it up and cool off.
Otis storms up the ramp, barking about this being his night! But Orton gets in the ring to RKO Gable!! And then Riddle trips up Otis on the apron! RKBRO got one over on the Academy, and now Orton wears one of the red graduation gowns! Orton gets the mic to then tell the Academy, “We accept!” Will Riddle & Orton get PhDs in kicking the Academy’s asses?
Austin Theory visits Vince McMahon.
Theory thanks Vince for the rematch with Finn Balor. But uh, what’s Vince watching on his TV? It was the previous match, where Finn won. Oh… Theory knows he lost, but then he beat the hell outta Finn and nearly ended his career. In fact, it was like a half victory. No such thing. So tonight, Theory needs to beat Finn and beat him up. If Theory doesn’t, Vince will get someone to drag Theory to this office and Vince will beat Theory up! Smash him all over, and by the time he’s finished, it’ll just be blood, snot and broken teeth. Then Vince will take a selfie with that. And send it to Mama Theory! Oh… Theory has been warned, will he make good on this rematch?
WWE honors Martin Luther King Jr.
“Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. That all men would be guaranteed the unalienable rights of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” That dream of MLK’s, where we judge not by the color of skin but by character, is still alive. We will all reach the Promised Land together.
Finn Balor VS Austin Theory!
Raw returns and Theory makes his entrance. The Prince is back after being out a month, will he make Theory pay for every minute he’s missed? The bell rings, they circle and tie up, and Theory puts Finn on ropes. The ref counts, Theory lets off but Finn blocks the cheap shot to kick and headlock! Finn thrashes to grind Theory down, Theory powers out but Finn ducks and dodges, only for Theory to CLOBBER him with an elbow! Theory drags Finn out of the ring to smack off the apron! And then whip him into barriers! Theory goes into the ring and the ring count climbs. Finn stands but Theory goes out after him.
Theory whips, Finn reverses, and Theory hits barriers! Finn then hits a SLINGBLADE! Theory writhes, the count is rising, and Raw goes to break.
Raw returns and Finn rallies, trips and DOUBLE STOMPS Theory down! Theory goes to a corner, Finn runs in and CHOPS! Finn whips Theory corner to corner, Theory reverse but Finn reverses back, ELBOW DROP DDT! Cover, TWO! Finn snarls, Theory crawl to ropes and Finn KICKS him out of the ring! Finn drags Theory up but Theory HOTSHOTS! Theory somersaults in, but into a SLINGBLADE! Finn then runs, into a LARIAT from Theory! Theory hauls Finn up to FLAPJACK HOTSHOT! Fireman’s carry, A T- NO! Finn makes it a roll up, TWO! Theory and Finn get up, and Finn goes to the apron. Finn shoulders into Theory, GAMANGIRIS, then climbs up!
But Theory avoids the Coup De Grace to somersault SHOTGUN! Fireman’s carry, A T L!! Cover, Theory wins!
Winner: Austin Theory, by pinfall
Theory saves himself from Vince’s wrath, and he gets his victory selfie. But to make good on what Vince told him, Theory fires off fists! Theory then drags Finn up, fireman’s carries again, for another A T L! Theory tells Finn to expect the unexpected. But will Finn find a way to teach Theory and Mr. McMahon respect for The Prince?
Nikki A.S.H. VS Rhea Ripley!
Before the match, Rhea is interviewed backstage. How does she respond to Nikki saying it was Rhea who ruined the relationship? Rhea says she never intended for this to hurt their friendship. But Nikki made up her mind. Rhea isn’t one to forgive very easily, so what kind of hero attacks a friend? If Rhea’s the villain here, than Nikki’s more delirious than Rhea thought. It’s time to remind everyone who Rhea Ripley is. Is Nikki in for a Nightmare tonight?
Raw returns and Nikki makes her entrance, but then so do Queen Zelina Vega and Carmella. Mella says, “Hear ye, hear ye, Tulsa. The Most Beautiful Woman in All of WWE and Your Queen have arrived to tell everyone in this dusty arena that everything we predicted about Nikki A.S.H. has come true.” Zelina’s word is absolute, and therefore she is correct by default. Not only is she a beloved queen, but also a fairy godmother. Rhea would never have been rid of Nikki without their little push. Rhea should be thanking them! Because they’ve been telling Rhea for weeks that if she stuck with an Almost Superhero, she’d never be nothing more than an almost threat.
But seems things are too late. Rhea doesn’t look like anything more than a low class loser. Without Nikki as her security blanket, does Rhea have what it takes? As Zelina’s said, you’re either the most powerful women in the room, or you’re nothing. Zelina is queen, but Rhea will be standing there, covered in trash, looking for someone to leech off of. Rhea doesn’t have the guts to be champion all on her own. Rhea tells them to bring it, then, but Nikki goes after Rhea! The ref wants Nikki to let off, but Nikki keeps hammering Rhea down! Rhea hits back but Nikki throws Rhea down! Nikki is seething, and then she drags Rhea up. Rhea kicks Nikki away but Nikki throws her out!
Nikki WRECKS Rhea with a dropkick, then goes out to RAM her into steel steps! The Almost Superhero leaves Rhea down, but the match is called off. Will Rhea get right? Or will she get revenge?
Dana Brooke and Reggie regroup backstage.
What did they talk about? Staying low and staying mobile. That’s right! Reggie is faster, stronger and amazing! Use Omos’ size against him, tire him out, and go for the legs. Meanwhile, R-Truth, Akira Tozawa, Tamina, and a referee are watching while eating popcorn. Dana says Reggie can be vicious and ruthless while also super athletic. Reggie says, “Who am I kidding?” He ran into Omos full speed and bounced off him! Dana says Reggie is the most capable man she knows. Just stay away from him. But even Dana looks worried. Truth says Dana must really hate Reggie. She just told him to get got! Will Reggie even survive his run-in with Omos?
Reggie w/ Dana Brooke VS Omos!
Raw returns and Reggie makes his entrance. Dana is cheering him on, but she still looks very worried. Omos points out the clear height difference, and then he roars! Even that scares Reggie! But then here come the 24/7 Championship hunters! Dana runs into the ring, scoots under Omos and out the other side. Omos catches Tozawa, TOSSES him out, then CLOBBERS Truth! Tamina stares Omos down and Reggie climbs the corner. Tamina goes around Omos, the bell rings, and Reggie leaps! Into Omos’ arms! Omos uses both hands for the MOUNTAIN TOSS! Omos says it’s that easy. Cover, Omos wins.
Winner: Omos, by pinfall
Omos didn’t break a sweat with that one! Will the colossus of Raw continue to dominate until he’s on top of the world?
Maryse heads to the ring!
As her note said, she is here to talk with Beth face-to-face. But will that all this be? Or do Miz & Mrs. have a plan for the Glamazon? We find out, after the break.
Raw returns and Maryse has a mic to say, “Bonsoir (good evening), Tulsa.” She assures us The Miz couldn’t make it. He has a very big mouth and likes to agree to things without asking her first, so tonight, she is cleaning up his mess. She then asks Beth to come out alone so they can do this right. Woman to woman, wife to wife and mother to mother, Maryse wants to talk. Beth makes her entrance, but Edge still follows her out. Maryse wants Edge to wait on the ramp until they’ve had this conversation. There aren’t many ways to put this, but the match at the Rumble, it has to be canceled. Uh, okay. This oughta be good, so Beth is all ears.
Maryse says she doesn’t want it, surely Beth doesn’t want it, and the fans don’t want it! Fans boo, they DO want it. Maryse is trying to have a heartfelt moment, guys. Really? Really? Really? Maryse is sure sounding like Miz here… Maryse says she has the mic, so she can be louder than everyone here. It doesn’t matter what you think! Now she’s The Rock? But anyway, Maryse wants Beth to listen. They’re from the same generation in WWE. They fought together. Remember those two minute matches? Fans chant, “You Suck!” but Maryse asks if they’re done.
But Beth, c’mon. They fought together and made the Women’s Division what it is today! They’re great at what they do! Just look at them! Women nowadays main event WrestleMania thanks to these two! So if anything, Maryse thinks that they should be on the same team. They should be a unit! Friends! Even their daughters can be friends! They can have play dates, dinners, or even just a coffee. Beth wants Maryse to know that she speaks for everyone here when she says, “Just shut up!” Seriously? BFF’s? Playdates? Is anyone buying this? NOPE! So that means Maryse takes acting lessons from The Miz.
Beth boils it down to a simple answer: the match is NOT off. Beth is NOT missing the chance to tag team with her husband for the first time ever. And she is NOT missing the chance to Glam Slam Maryse’s ass through the canvas! In fact, why not give the fans a preview? Beth storms up to the ring but Maryse stays put. Wait, Miz attacks Edge at the ramp! But Edge DECKS Miz! Maryse really was lying about Miz being at home! But then Maryse CLOBBERS Beth with her purse! What’s in that bag?! Maryse and Miz decide to show us: it was a BRICK! A literal BRICK! Maryse tosses her hair back and celebrates with The Miz. But will Edge and Beth only look to break The It Couple for that one?
The Street Profits are fired up backstage!
Angelo Dawkins & Montez Ford have a dream! The dream is that they have a plan and will execute it and win! The best part is, they do it in Tulsa, Oklahoma~! YESSIR! All the bodies in the ring, it’ll be like a mini Rumble. Which is great cuz the Profits were the first to declare for this year’s Rumble! Their first one, tossin’ bodies! But will Ford throw Dawkins? Rey Mysterio & Dom walk over to say not to worry. They’re a team tonight, and they’ll also be in the Rumble. Rey has to get this off his chest: Los Mysterios will outlast 28 other men in the Rumble. And then, not only will they throw those guys out, they’ll take the Mysterio name back to the Mania main event!
Okay, all due respect, that’s only if the Profits don’t make it there first. Because the Profits are up! And WE WANT THE SMOKE! Will these four burn it down to then light it up on the Road to WrestleMania?
8 Man Tag: The Street Profits & The Mysterios VS Apollo Crews, Commander Azeez & The Dirty Dawgs!
Raw returns and the Dawgs make their entrance. Then the Pride of Nigeria and his right hand man make their entrance. Teams sort out, Dolph Ziggler starts against Dom. They tie up, Dom waistlocks but Ziggler elbows free. Ziggler talks trash, runs, but Dom follows to RANA! Dom runs at Ziggler in the corner but Ziggler CLOBBERS Dom! Tag to Robert Roode and he stomps Dom. Roode drags Dom up, suplexes, but Dom knees free! Dom kicks low, tags Rey, and Rey gets a boost to RANA! Rey whips, Roode reverses but Rey dodges and tilt-o-whirl headscissors! Rey runs in but Roode puts him on the apron. Rey DECKS Roode, climbs, and leaps, but the rana is blocked
Roode brings Rey up, but Rey RANAS Roode out of the ring! Ziggler and Dom get in, Dom whips but Ziggler throws Dom up and out! Ford and Dawkins DROPKCIK Ziggler out! All eight men are on the outside now and shouting, but the ref keeps the peace while Raw goes to break!
Raw returns, Roode tags Ziggler and the Dawgs double whip Rey to double elbow him down. Then the Dawgs hit Rey’s corner to knock everyone down! Fans boo but Ziggler drags Rey over to tag Apollo. Apollo hits a STANDING MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Ziggler is upset on Apollo’s behalf, but Apollo decides he’ll finish it now. Apollo gets Rey up, trophy lifts, but Rey fights free to a DDT! Both men are down and fans fire up! Rey crawls, Dawks is back! Hot tag to the Curse of Greatness! And he rallies on everyone! He hurdles Apollo to hit a FLYING BACK ELBOW! Roode runs into an EXPLODER! Ziggler runs into an EXPLODER!
Dawkins gives Apollo a CYCLONE SPLASH, then the SILENCER! But Azeez gets in to break the cover! Ford returns to ENZIGURI Azeez out! The Dawgs TOSS Ford out! But the Mysterios dropkick the Dawgs onto the ropes! STEREO 619’s! Dom goes up and out to LEAP at Azeez! But Azeez catches him! Rey jumps to add on, the Mysterios take out Azeez! But Apollo rolls Dawkins up! TWO, and pop-up for SKY HIGH! Tag to Ford, he’s up top! FROM THE HEAVENS!! Cover, the Profits & Mysterios win!
Winners: The Street Profits & The Mysterios, by pinfall
Ford was five-star again with that splash, but then the Mysterios decide to dump the Profits out! Rey says that’s nothing personal, just a sample of the Rumble. And then he dumps Dom out! The son’s got a lot to learn still. But will Dom & Rey look to be in that final handful at the Rumble to put their name back on the WrestleMania marquee?
WWE looks at the parallels of Lashley and Lesnar.
“Forge: to form by heating and hammering; to beat into shape.” Great warriors are born at the forge, shaped by the heat of the fire and tried in the brutality of combat. This is the beginning of two such warriors. “The great plains often invoke idyllic dreams of an unending cascades of crops and green pastures. But in winter, these dreams are overtaken by the harsh reality of desolation and decay. It is here that the heart of a Beast was forged, and a Conqueror was born.” Brock Lesnar is a two-time NCAA All American with over 100 victories, and the NCAA Division I Heavyweight Champion. And just five months after his WWE debut, The Next Big Thing was WWE Champion.
After ravaging every challenger in the WWE, the Beast would go to the UFC, and in just three fights, he’d reign supreme as the UFC Heavyweight Champion. Then upon returning to the WWE, Lesnar’s path of devastation continued. He took 16-time WWE Champion John Cena to Suplex City, ended The Undertaker’s WrestleMania undefeated streak, and cemented his dominance as a three-time Universal and six-time World Champion. He is a Beast without limits, without remorse, and without fear.
“Discipline. Restraint. Control. It is from these fires that the All Mighty was forged. Son of a US Army drill sergeant, Bobby Lashley learned at an early age that only by rigorously harnessing his natural ability that he would the greatness that he sought.” A three-time NAIA wrestling champion, Lashley would follow his father’s footsteps into the Army, and he honed his craft onto his way to winning gold in the Armed Forces Championship. Lashley would emerge in WWE as a peak physical specimen, unleashing a torrent of physical power and ferocity. But while he won gold, Lashley couldn’t quite find that next level.
A sojourn into MMA ignited the fires and Lashley had a 15-2 record. Then he’d return to the WWE and he would unleash havoc on opponent after opponent with his arsenal of high impact moves, headlined by the Hurt Lock full nelson. He would become United States Champion, Intercontinental Champion, and ultimately, WWE World Champion. Now, Lashley is ready for the one challenge that eluded him. For 20 years, Lashley believes Lesnar was ducking him. But Lesnar is confident that if they’d met before, Lesnar would’ve already beaten him. But the Royal Rumble will see the champion Beast collide with an All Mighty challenger.
These paths have finally crossed. Two warriors, forged in flame, battle and gold, fight for the ultimate prize. Only one emerges THE WWE World Champion. Will the ring even stay standing as these wage war?
The Miz & Maryse are heading out.
Kevin Patrick stops them to ask about that vicious attack. Miz says it took ONE SHOT to take down the Glamazon! Now Beth needs medical attention! Now the Grit Couple is the SH- Maryse stops Miz there. The girls are watching at home. Oh, right. Daddy loves ya, girls! And Miz loves Mommy. He is the best husband ever, because he remembered that Maryse’s birthday is next week! So before saying bonny nut- No, no, it’s bonne nuit. The T is silent. Right, bonne nuit to the Grit Couple, Miz is going to throw the most expensive, extravagant and amazing birthday party that anyone has ever seen, because Miz loves Maryse.
Nothing, especially not Edge & Beth, is stronger than their love. These two make-out right in front of us… But will announcing the birthday party here come back to bite the It Couple?
Alexa Bliss has another therapy session.
She and her therapist sit quietly a moment before he welcomes her back. He’s happy to say that there are less breakable things here in the office. She isn’t sure about that. But these sessions will continue. He will not tolerate a repeat of last week, though. He does apologize for showing her such a sensitive subject, but he had to know where she stood psychological. He promises her that she will be on the road to recovery. Neat. Now, let’s do word association. Okay, sure. How does she feel about the word, “Trust.” “Lily.” Friend? Lily. Home? Lily. Doll… Lily. Imaginary. Alexa gets up out of her seat and glares at him. Okay, time’s up.
The doc bolts but Alexa cools off. She sits back down, looks around the room, but stays quiet. Will Alexa ever get over her twistedly tragic past?
Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS Seth Rollins!
The Rocky Mountain Machine is ready to wreck everything, including Brock Lesnar. Meanwhile, The Visionary is preparing to repeat history and defeat Roman Reigns once again. But who will have some major momentum on their side going towards those titanic title matches? The main event of top championship challengers begins after the break!
Raw returns and Rollins makes his entrance. The bell rings and Lashley glares while Rollins smirks. The two circle, fans rally up, and the two tie up. Rollins headlocks, Lashley powers up to power out, but Rollins duck sand dodges. Lashley hurdles then runs Rollins over! Fans cheer as Lashley mocks Rollins’ pose. The two reset, circle and tie up again. Rollins waistlocks, Lashley uses ropes to buck Rollins away, but Rollins hurdles and drops to then go perpendicular, SLINGBLADE! Rollins kicks, reels Lashley in, but Lashley back drops free! Lashley stalks Rollins, but Rollins fights the full nelson! Rollins drops to KICK Lashley, then he dumps Lashley out!
Rollins builds speed to DIVE! Direct hit but Lashley stays up! Rollins goes back in, builds speed again, DIVES, but into a clinch! OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Lashley roars and Rollins flounders while Raw goes to break.
Raw returns again and Rollins has Lashley down now! Rollins drags Lashley to a corner to SLAM a leg against the post! Rollins SLAMS the leg again, talks trash to MVP, then gets in as the ring count reaches 5 of 10. Rollins drags Lashley up, puts the bad leg in the ropes, pulls until the ref counts, then dropkicks the leg! Lashley falls, Rollins drags him to center and steps through to drop a leg on the knee! Lashley snarls and fans rally up. MVP coaches Lashley, but Rollins drops another leg on the bad knee! And then another! Rollins has the toehold, ties up the legs, but Lashley fights, only for Rollins to still get the Indian Deathlock!
Rollins keeps Lashley’s hands away while Lashley endures the hold. Rollins SLAPS Lashley in the side, but Lashley pulls hair! The ref reprimands, Lashley lets go but he punches Rollins! Rollins lets the legs free, but then he gets the bad one for a DRAGON SCREW! And into a HALF CRAB! Lashley endures, even as Rollins sits deep! Lashley powers up, fans rally up, and Lashley turns, only for Rollins to stomp the leg! Rollins has the Half Crab again! MVP coaches Lashley more but Rollins talks trash on “Bob.” Lashley fights up, turns things over, and he boots Rollins away! Rollins falls out of the ring but he’s right back in! Lashley avoids the stomp for a COMPLETE SHOT!
MVP says that’s the All Mighty Lashley he knows! Lashley grits his teeth and pushes up, just as Rollins also sits up. Rollins turns around into an OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! And then another! Lashley runs in at the corner, to RAM into Rollins! Lashley turns Rollins around, NECKBREAKER! Lashley fires up and Tulsa fires up with him! Lashley gets Rollins up, suplexes, but Rollins fights free! Lashley kicks low to gut wrench, DOMINATOR! Cover, TWO!! Rollins survives but MVP coaches Lashley to keep going. Lashley aims from a corner, Rollins rises, Lashley runs in, into a KNEE! Rollins hits a ROLLING ELBOW! Then runs, but into a scoop!
Rollins slips out, shoves Lashley into buckles, then kicks low! Rollins underhooks the arms, PEDIGREE!! Cover, TWO!?! Lashley survives but Rollins is too tired to be shocked! Fans rally behind Lashley but Rollins stands. Rollins goes to a corner, climbs up top, but Lashley gets him with a choke grip! Lashley climbs up, but Rollins fights with elbows! But Lashley clinches, for a SUPER BELLY2BELLY!! Rollins goes flying to the other side of the ring! Lashley gets back to a corner but the Hurt Business go after him!!
Winner: Bobby Lashley, by disqualification
Cedric Alexander & Shelton Benjamin mug Lashley but Lashley fights back! That’s still 2v1, and they POST him! Alexander & Benjamin shout that he’s brought this upon himself, and then the POST Lashley again! They glare at MVP but then drag Lashley back up. But Lashley DOUBLE SUPLEXES them instead! COMPLETE SHOT for Benjamin! Fireman’s carry and the POST for Alexander! Lashley SPEARS Benjamin through barriers! Rollins is shocked at seeing the carnage, but the USOS run out from the crowd! Rollins turns around, into DOUBLE SUPERKICKS! Jimmy & Jey make up for missing the target on SmackDown!
Rollins lost the match and then got got! Will he stand a chance of dethroning the Head of the Table if the Usos can get him on his show? As for Lashley, will he be able to go for the gold if he has his former henchmen coming after him?
This was a decent episode, but with really glaring low points. Does Vince just hate Women’s Wrestling again? Why is it that the matches tonight were basically filler to move the story along? Nikki VS Rhea being No Contest was whatever since it at least went with story. But that opening tag match had Becky, Piper, Bianca and Liv, all of which are basically the stars of the Raw Women’s Division. Yet Vince couldn’t be bothered to give that match more than a bathroom break amount of time! I suppose because it was Piper ending it all very quickly, we’re supposed to think Piper is that great, but honestly it just hurt all four women. If Bianca was taken out by just a corner splash, how is she to win the Rumble?
Finn VS Theory 2 was also way too short. I get there was a commercial break in the middle but that just makes it worse. Theory winning was clean also a shame, and not because of Vince’s weird threat to him. I get that Theory needed to win to make a feud out of this, but why not dirty it up a little? When is Finn going to get a chance to comment on how Theory is Vince’s pet project and all that? This whole thing is just hurting my brain. And only a little less than the Veer Mahaan videos coming back. He better show up in the Rumble. And this week’s Alexa therapy session was filler. It was just her associating everything with Lily but not even in a more compelling way than last week’s “triggered Alexa” vignette.
We got a good 8 Man Tag but it was also on the short side. It was pretty standard Rumble season stuff for Rey & Dom to dump the Profits out, but Rey dumping Dom was a bit of a surprise. Maybe Dom will do the same during the Rumble on Rey? I did appreciate them weaving three backstage segments into one, going from Reggie wanting advice from Edge but basically striking out, and then Edge talking with Priest and then Priest talking with Kevin. If Dana still has the 24/7 title come the Women’s Rumble, can that title end up hot potato’d around to end up on someone from SmackDown? Or does Fox just hate that title?
Omos of course destroyed Reggie, but I almost thought he was going to somehow end up 24/7 champion. That’d probably put the end to the title, though, because who would even try to take it from him? Kevin had a very good match with Priest, and his win definitely puts him in line for the US Championship, but who knows if Kevin will even go for it with him so closely connected to Rollins in their stories. And we got a good promo segment out of Maryse and Beth. But Maryse bringing up the Diva Era short matches and yet we got a short women’s match here, the irony clearly goes over Vince’s thick head. That brick in the purse, though. And telegraphing the birthday stuff for next week, Maryse’s cake is definitely going into someone’s face.
The Alpha Academy graduation was a pretty good segment. I am sure Riddle was referencing something but I can’t place it. I can’t believe they’re kayfabing that Otis never had the last name “Dozovic.” That’s taking Vince’s love of editing names to a new, dumber level. But I loved the face Otis made when Gable said they were going to have a tag team academic challenge. He’s going to end up the weak link for his team since this graduation was based on his in-ring skills. The Lesnar Lashley vignette was well made, but a rather melodramatic theme in the narration. After the string of short matches, it just felt like WWE trying too hard to be cinematic and not enough about action.
Lashley VS Rollins was great stuff, until the Hurt Business “ruined” things. It just keeps reminding us of how flippant they’ve been with that faction’s story. They work together against Goldberg but then not together against Lesnar, and now the Hurt Business is just being thrown at Lashley in an attempt to build Lashley as brutal and dominant without it being in the matches. The Usos getting the drop on Rollins was pretty good, though, since that carries over from SmackDown. If they’d let it just be the Usos trying to mess with Rollins, I think things would’ve felt a bit better.
My Score: 8/10
Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (1/17/22)
Raleigh gets Elevated!
A lucky seven for Elevation!
AEW continues in Raleigh and has a strong seven for Elevation! Jay Lethal is keeping himself sharp for what could be an FTW Championship showdown!
- Matt Sydal & Lee Moriarty VS JR Miller & Marcus Kross; Sydal & Moriarty wins.
- Tay Conti VS Ameera; Conti wins.
- Gunn Club VS JB Cole & T.I.M; Gunn Club wins.
- Frankie Kazarian VS Labron Kozone; Kaz wins.
- Ruby Soho VS Kenzie Page; Soho wins.
- Private Party VS Chase Emory & Patrick Scott; Private Party wins.
- Jay Lethal VS Alexander Moss; Lethal wins.
Pretty clear cut stuff here, but I like that we’re seeing Sydal & Moriarty in tag action again. Kenzie Page is back in AEW and she’ll give Ruby Soho a good match. Good to see Kaz back in action, they kinda let the ball drop on his Elite Hunter story but maybe he can build himself up towards the TNT Championship. And I have a feeling in Gunn Club’s match, fans will troll Austin & Colten as “Ass Boys” again and that could come close to costing them.
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The Reverend Rey Cash returns to the Bandwagon just in time to discuss all of the latest Marvel Cinematic Universe...
Andrew’s Judgmental Album Reviews: Eliminator – Ancient Light (2022)
YO! The JAR tends to like the New Wave of British Heavy Metal sound. This band is inspired by that...
BWN Nerds’ Review: The Book of Boba Fett – Ch. 2
After an overall luke warm start, does the second episode heat up at all for The Book of Boba Fett?...
BWN Nerds’ Review: The Book Of Boba Fett Episode 1: Stranger In A Strange Land (2022)
The Nerds tackle Disney Plus series The Book of Boba Fett in the latest edition of the Nerd Review!
Bandwagon Nerds #113 The Marvel/DC Decathlon Pt. 5
The Marvel/DC Decathlon reaches it’s dramatic conclusion as Dave, Patrick, and PC Tunney decide brand superiority with respect to villains...
A Change In Attitude #33 Raw 16th December 1996
The fallout from IYH It’s Time kicks off the run to the 1997 Royal Rumble! Bret Hart isn’t happy...
Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (1/17/22)
Is Becky Lynch sweatin' Doudrop?
Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (1/17/22)
Raleigh gets Elevated!
News From Cook’s Corner 1.17.22: Gory Self-Mutilation
AEW tried to catch lightning in a bottle for the second time. Did it work? What other news struck last...
NXT 2021 Year in Review: NXT UK!!!
With the OG NXT rebranding and losing a lot of credibility, at least NXT UK has been consistent! Brad brings...
DWI Podcast #307: Them Thangs Were Thanging!
Brock and Bobby, Seth and Roman & The It Couple vs The Grit Couple... all this and more this week...
The Outsider’s Edge presents The Multiverse Of Wrestling Episode
Rance and Kyle are back to talk Mickie James walking through WWE's forbidden door and the MLW lawsuit.
Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (1/14/22)
The tag champs are on a Rampage!
Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (1/14/22)
SmackDown gets extreme!
POD is WAR: Back In The Saddle
PiW returns to your earballs with plenty of pro wrestling conversation, some goodbyes and a look at the NFL Playoffs!