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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (1/28/22)

Seth Freakin’ Rollins returns!

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SmackDown 2022

One more SmackDown before the Royal Rumble!

Before going to St. Louis for the Royal Rumble, Seth Rollins returns to SmackDown to personally give Roman Reigns one last message.

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Cesaro & Ricochet VS Sheamus & Ridge Holland; Sheamus & Ridge win.
  • Naomi VS Sonya Deville; Naomi wins.
  • Shinsuke Nakamura & Rick Boogs VS Jinder Mahal & Shanky; Nakamura & Boogs win.
  • The New Day VS “Happy” Corbin & “Mad Cap” Moss; The New Day wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Charlotte Flair heads to the ring!

The Queen is in Kansas City, preparing to enter the Women’s Royal Rumble match as SmackDown Women’s Champion! She struts and turns for the pyro, then continues to the ring. She gets the mic and has a big smile on her face for KC as she says it is her honor as champion to do something that Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs will never do again. And that is bring a title to this city! Don’t worry, KC won’t be the only ones. So will 29 other women who will be banged up, bruised and thrown out like garbage by Charlotte. Now, there is nothing more difficult in the WWE, or unpredictable, than a Rumble match.

You have the shocking entrants, the surprising returns, and Charlotte’s favorites: the betrayals. It is every single woman for themselves! Everyone’s coming at you from all directions, knees and elbows, everyone scratching and clawing to throw the others out to the floor. Charlotte didn’t have to enter the match this year. No, no. She could’ve cruised to WrestleMania, waiting on a winner to choose her. But that’s not who she is and not the kind of champion she is. She doesn’t wait on fate or chance, sitting around hoping things work out. No, she takes control. That is why Charlotte is the most dominant champion in the history of the WWE!

Now, normally, the winner of the Rumble chooses the champion of their choosing to main event Mania. But tomorrow, Charlotte changes the game again as winner and chooses the challenger of her choosing! But wait! Here comes Shayna Baszler! The Queen of Spades goes to the ring and gets a mic to “apologize” to Charlotte. But bodies crashing, limbs snapping, that’s music to Shayna’s ears! But Charlotte, look. There is no denying you are an incredible competitor. But tomorrow night, if it ends up the two of them again, Shayna will not hesitate to snap her like a twig, limb by limb!

But y’know what? Shayna will make Charlotte a promise: after Shayna throws her out, she won’t waste any time in choosing Charlotte as her opponent. All Charlotte will have to worry about is making sure she’s healed up in time. Kinda like last time? But wait, here comes Aliyah! #Aliyah3:17 says hey, and wants to know if it’s okay to be out here. Seems like anyone can just walk out. Wait, who is this? Oh, sorry, she is Aliyah, and she just loves that she’s in her very first Royal Rumble. She’s got some butterflies in her stomach, because this means that maybe, Aliyah can compete at her first ever WrestleMania!

No, no, don’t book tickets just yet. Aliyah stands zero chance of winning tomorrow. Now, Aliyah knows she hasn’t won a lot of matches, but she did beat Natalya in 3.17 seconds! That set a new WWE record. So call her optimistic- Oh, here comes Natty! The Queen of Harts says Aliyah is adorable. There’s a lot of things Natty thinks  Aliyah is: rude, clueless, delusional, and lucky. But optimistic isn’t one of them. Aliyah can brag all she wants about that fluke, but Natty is a THREE-TIME GUINNESS RECORD HOLDER! Tomorrow, it’ll be four. These four argue, but here comes Shotzi Blackheart!

Shotzi says, “Well, look at this! What a preview for tomorrow night. All these massive egos colliding with each other and descending into chaos, creating the perfect opportunity for someone like… me. Someone exactly like me to sneak right in and seize the spotlight!” Charlotte says this is getting absurd! None of them belong in this ring with her, and none of them stand a chance of winning! No one here, no one in the WWE, and definitely not- Sasha Banks! The Legit Boss is here and struts her way to the ring now! Sasha gets her pyro on, Aliyah lets her have the mic, and Sasha says The Boss is back BABYYY~! And she’s ready to rumble!

Sasha stares Charlotte down as fans chant her name. Charlotte waves hi, Sasha SLAPS her! Charlotte steadies herself, and a brawl is on! Natty is after Aliyah, Shayna is after Shotzi! Natty hits a DISCUS on Charlotte! Sasha just smiles and watches as Shayna fires off kicks and Natty throws Aliyah down! KNEE for Shotzi sends her out of the ring! Natty drags Aliyah up but Aliyah ENZIGURIS back! Shayna runs in but Aliyah dodges and dropkicks her out! But Charlotte BOOTS Aliyah down! Sasha slides back in, and fans fire up as Boss and Queen stare down again. Charlotte kicks but Sasha blocks! Sasha says them feet stank, and then she KNEES Charlotte!

Sasha throws Charlotte out a la the Rumble! The Boss has the edge over the Queen, but will Sasha make the Rumble legit to get back to WrestleMania?

 

Backstage interview with Sheamus & Ridge Holland.

They’re moments away from a Day One rematch, and Ridge says it’s about time. He can still hear the crunch of his nose as it got smashed into the side of his face. Now he’ll return the favor and squash Ricochet like the parasite he is! The Fella says it’s great to have Ridgy back! Ridgy talks just like Sheamus, fights just like Sheamus, and when Sheamus becomes a two-time Rumble winner, Ridge will celebrate just like Sheamus. Ridge will also beat down Cesaro and Ricochet just like him, too! Sheamus gives Ridge a familiar protective mask, and now he looks just like Sheamus.

But will they both win to truly make up for Day One’s disaster? Or will the Swiss Cyborg & King of Flight redeem themselves this close to the Royal Rumble?

Cesaro & Ricochet VS Sheamus & Ridge Holland!

SmackDown returns as Cesaro makes his entrance, followed by Ricochet. The teams sort out, Cesaro starts against Sheamus. They tie up, go around, and end up in a corner. Cesaro turns it around on Sheamus but he shoves Cesaro away. They go again, Sheamus headlocks for the takeover, Cesaro headscissors but Sheamus kips free. Another headlock takeover, but Cesaro headscissors again. Sheamus kips free and bails out to regroup with Ridge. Sheamus gets back in, he and Cesaro tie up again, Cesaro hits the headlock takeover now. Cesaro resists the headscissor but Sheamus pulls on Cesaro’s nose!

The ref reprimands, Sheamus lets off, they get up and Sheamus puts Cesaro on the ropes. Sheamus knees low, headlocks, but Cesaro powers out. Sheamus runs Cesaro over and gloats, then runs, but Cesaro hurdles. Cesaro blocks hip toss to CLOBBER Sheamus! Cesaro then DOUBLE STOMPS Sheamus down! Cesaro brings Sheamus up, wrenches, and tags Ricochet in. Ricochet goes up, and he drops an ax handle on the arm! Ricochet wrenches, YANKS the arm, but Sheamus puts him against ropes to knee low. Sheamus CLUBS Ricochet and tags in Ridge! Ridge CLUBS Ricochet, EuroUppers, then whips him corner to corner.

Ricochet goes up and over, kicks, but Ridge blocks to flip him! Ricochet throws Ridge out, triangle jumps and dropkicks Ridge back down! Ridge flounders, Ricochet builds speed and FLIES! Direct hit at the ramp and Ricochet is fired up! KC is fired up, too, as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Sheamus brings Ricochet up. Ricochet throws body shots then kicks! Ricochet runs, but into a scoop and BACKBREAKER! Tag to Ridge, and Ridge gets Ricochet up to RAM him into a corner! And then runs him corner to corner to RAM him in the other corner! And then back the other way! Ridge reels Ricochet in, head ‘n’ arm SUPLEX! Sheamus shouts, “Are you not entertained?!” Ridge drags Ricochet up to go after Ricochet’s nose! Then he drops a knee on Ricochet’s forehead! Ridge CLUBS Ricochet, drags him up, scoops and SLAMS him, then drops an elbow! Cover, TWO!

Ridge drags Ricochet up, gut wrenches and Canadian racks to bend the arms back! Ricochet endures, pries free and throws elbows into Ridge’s head! Ridge keeps Ricochet from Cesaro, but Ricochet QUEBRADAS! Direct hit and both men are down! Hot tags to Cesaro and Sheamus! Cesaro fires off on Sheamus, EuroUpper after EuroUpper, then fists in the corner! Cesaro EuroUppers, whips corner to corner, runs in to EuroUpper, then back the other way. Sheamus elbows Cesaro, but Cesaro dodges to springboard and FLYING UPPERCUT! Sheamus boots but is blocked and dumped out!

Cesaro goes out, runs in around the way, EuroUpper against barriers! Fans fire up with Cesaro and he high-fives Pat McAfee! Cesaro puts Sheamus in the ring, climbs up the corner, CROSSBODY! Sheamus gets up, scoops Cesaro, but Cesaro slips out of the Irish Curse to small package! Ridge breaks it, but Ricochet springboards to missile dropkick Ridge out! Sheamus KNEES Ricochet down! Cesaro torture racks Sheamus for the SLAM! Cover, TWO! Sheamus survives but Cesaro drags him up! Cesaro reels Sheamus in, but Sheamus back drops! Cesaro lands on his feet, Ridge tags in! Cesaro ducks the Brogue but Ridge HEADBUTTS Cesaro down!

NORTHERN GRIT!! Cover, Ridge and Sheamus win!!

Winners: Sheamus & Ridge Holland, by pinfall

The protective mask became an offensive weapon, and Cesaro may have a busted nose! Will Ridge and Sheamus bust into the SmackDown Tag Division with teamwork like this?

 

Naomi VS Sonya Deville!

Finally, we get to see this one play out! But Sonya is intimidating the ref backstage into doing the job for her. But he tells her, he is calling this one down the middle. Sonya is taken aback, but will she have no choice but to #FeelTheGlow?

SmackDown returns and Sonya makes her entrance. The ref explains that he expects things fair and clean, because he’s calling this down the middle. The bell rings, Sonya dodges Naomi, then uses ropes for defense. Naomi has no choice but to back off, but that just annoys her. Sonya comes back, circles with Naomi, then dodges her again to use the ropes for defense. Fans boo and Naomi gets further annoyed, but Sonya comes back again. They circle, Sonya kicks low, then fires forearms. Naomi hits back with furious fists and now it’s a scrap! Sonya rains down rights, Naomi gets the ropes, the ref backs Sonya off.

Sonya comes back for stomps, the ref has her back off and reminds her of the ropebreak. Sonya looms over Naomi, drags her up, and then throws her down hard! Sonya paces around, taunts Naomi and clamps on a chinlock. Naomi endures, fans rally up, and Naomi fights up to throw body shots. Naomi arm-drags free, then tilt-o-whirls to headscissor Sonya to the apron! Sonya gets up, Naomi eggs her on, but Sonya stays back to compose herself. Naomi gets through to hit Sonya but Sonya knees low! Sonya whips, Naomi reverses but Sonya reverses back to knee low again. Soya stands Naomi up to KICK her down! Cover, TWO!

Sonya argues the count, the ref says it was fair. Sonya drags Naomi up, Naomi SLAPS her! Naomi eggs Sonya on then dropkicks her down! Sonya bails out, Naomi WRECKS her with another dropkick! Naomi bumps Sonya off the apron, then BULLDOGS her onto it! Naomi gets Sonya in the ring, covers, ONE!! Sonya scrambles away, but Naomi builds speed, only for Sonya to catch the baseball slide! Sonya swings Naomi around, DRAPING REVERSE DDT to the floor! Sonya is furious and demands the ring count, but SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Sonya knees Naomi, but Naomi fires off kicks. Naomi whips, Sonya reveres but Naomi goes up to headsicssor. Sonya blocks to make it a SPINEBUSTER! High stack, TWO!! Sonya is furious but she wraps on a chinlock. Sonya grinds Naomi down, but fans rally up as Naomi endures. Naomi fights up, but Sonya throws her down by her hair! Sonya gets in the ref’s face about it, then steps on Naomi. Cover, ONE! Sonya wraps on the chinlock again and she grinds Naomi down. Sonya taunts the fans chanting for Naomi but Naomi fights up. Sonya throws Naomi by her hair again, but Naomi kips up to ROUNDHOUSE!

Naomi gets to a corner, Sonya run sin but she blocks boots. Naomi ENZIGURIS off the ropes! Then cravat to a JUMPING STUNNER! Sonya gets to a corner, Naomi runs in, BIG clothesline! And a HEEL KICK! Then a BUCKLE BULLDOG! Fans fire up as Naomi climbs up top, for a CROSSBODY! Cover, TWO! Sonya survives that flurry of offense and Naomi grows frustrated. Naomi drops a leg! Cover, TWO! Sonya is still in this, but Naomi has the fans rallying behind her. Naomi gets up, brings Sonya up and goes for another corner. Sonya shoves Naomi into the buckles! Sonya reels Naomi in, suplexes, and POWERSLAMS! Cover, TWO!!

Sonya can’t believe it! Naomi survives but Sonya drags her back up. Sonya fireman’s carries, Naomi kicks free and full nelsons! BUBBA BOMB! Rolling body scissor clutch, TWO!! Naomi can’t believe Sonya survives, but she keeps her cool. Naomi also keeps Sonya from crawling away! Sonya grabs at the ring apron, the ref has to fix it. Sonya RAKES the eyes!! Roll up, with tights! TWO!! Sonya couldn’t screw Naomi over and now she’s furious! Sonya waits for Naomi to stand, she runs in, but Naomi dodges, REARVIEW!! Then SPLIT LEG MOONSAULT! Cover, Naomi wins!!

Winner: Naomi, by pinfall

And the ref gets away before Sonya can get at him! Naomi wins this one fair and square and has some momentum going into the Women’s Rumble! Naomi gets the mic to shout, “Guys! We did it!” After 153 days of Sonya “Cruella” Deville throwing everything she had at her, Naomi would not let that stop the glow! Naomi shined through, just like she’ll shine when she wins the Rumble! So, Sonya, don’t slip on your tears on your way out. Bye, girl! Go on, get! Nana na na, hey hey hey, good bye~! But will Naomi make all 29 other women in the Rumble match #FeelTheGlow on the road to WrestleMania?

Wait, Sonya says to cut the music! She’s got her suit back on so she’s boss lady again. Naomi’s so excited, huh? Because the Rumble is Naomi’s favorite match of the year! Well as WWE official, Sonya won’t let Naomi go into the match without a little surprise. That’s the kind of person Sonya is! The surprise is a very special guest entrant: SONYA DEVILLE! Sonya wants to personally ruin Naomi’s chances, but will it all just backfire on her?

 

Backstage interview with The Usos.

Jimmy & Jey, the SmackDown Tag Team Champions, are barred from ringside during the Universal Championship match tomorrow. But as for tonight’s face-to-face meeting, what do they think Seth Rollins will have to say to Roman Reigns? They don’t care! Just cuz they’re banned from ringside doesn’t change that one thing will stay the same: AND STILL WWE Universal Champion, Roman Reigns! But the Viking Raiders walk in. Oh, their new challengers! This the team that throws axes, have feasts, and uh… Just stink. Well, yeah, they do love a good feast. And they do cultivate a rather manly odor.

But one thing above all, the Viking Raiders love axes. They bring out a couple good hatchets. These aren’t just for throwing! You could trim beards, sever fingers, or cut a championship right in half. Wanna see? Jey has Jimmy back down for now, but Erik & Ivar are looking to cut that reign short! Will the Viking Raiders get some gold again when they finally collide with the Usos?

 

Sami Zayn heads to the ring!

And before he decides to go #InZayn again, he’s got some special guests in mind! But what will happen when the Great Liberator welcomes Jinder Mahal & Shanky to his “reality” show? We find out, after the break.

SmackDown returns and Sami’s made his show into a podcast. To be honest, the stunts and pranks got outta hand, and thanks to a certain Johnny Knoxville- don’t cheer for him! Sami almost got hospitalized. But now this is the InZayn live podcast! So the first guests are Jinder & Shanky, who are already in the ring. These two ill be in tag action against soon to be former Intercontinental Champion, Shinsuke Nakamura, who owes Sami a match, and his muscle bound metal head friend, Rick Boogs. Sami thanks Jinder & Shanky for being here, and Jinder says it is a pleasure to be on the pilot episode-

Sami apologizes for cutting him off, but this is what this should’ve been from the start. What was Sami thinking, stooping down to Knoxville’s level? He never wants to hear Knoxville’s name again. So fans chant it at Sami. Haha, shush! They’re gonna edit this part out. But this is the intellectual show. Smart people having smart conversations about smart topics. Like, what does Shanky think on consumerism in a post modernist society? And how is Jinder feeling about his match tonight? Jinder says he has embarrassed Nakamura time and time again, tonight will be no different. And each man has a protégé, but just look at Shanky!

Sami interrupts again, and says he apologizes for droning on and on about Knoxville. Shanky’s probably never even hard of that guy until a few weeks ago. Actually, Jackass is huge in India. Just ask Shanky. Shanky says he loves that show, especially bungie port-a-potty. Oh, wow, really? Sami will respectfully disagree. He doesn’t think the only people who like Jackass are these yokels in KC. Don’t boo, this is Sami’s podcast! This is gonna get cut! But then Rick Boogs interrupts with his rock ‘n’ roll! And he is here to rock with the Intercontinental Champion, Shinsuke NakamuraAAAAAA~! And so here he comes!

Sami shouts down Boogs’ rock, and says that maybe they didn’t notice he was doing a podcast! Shinsuke ROUNDHOUSES Sami down! Sami is furious as he bails out, but will he have to settle for watching the tag match?

Shinsuke Nakamura & Rick Boogs VS Jinder Mahal & Shanky!

The King of Strong Style may “owe” Sami a title match, but will he and his beefy bard put a beating on the Modern Day Maharaja and his towering sidekick?

SmackDown returns and Nakamura is giving Jinder Bad Vibrations! Tag to Boogs, they mug Jinder, and then feed to a scoop and spinning TOSS! Boogs flexes, but Shanky tags in! Shanky and Boogs stare down while Sami complains on commentary. Shanky and Boogs tie up, Shanky shoves Boogs away. They tie up again, Shanky shoves Boogs back again. But then BOogs gets up and under to put Shanky in the corner! Boogs fires off hands, lets off as the ref counts, and Shanky BOOTS Boogs! Shanky CLUBS Boogs, puts him in the corner and throws back elbows. Boogs ROCKS Shanky, hits Jinder, then ROCKS Shanky again!

Boogs fires off body shots, CLUBS Shanky, but Shanky resists the bearhug to get a grovit! Boogs powers through to facelock and suplex Shanky up and over! Fans fire up and Sami tries to play down the feat of strength! Jinder distracts the ref, Sami goes over to YANK Nakamura off the corner! Jinder tags in, he CLOBBERS Boogs! Jinder CLUBS Boogs but Boogs is powering up! Boogs-mania, baby! Jinder freaks out, tags Shanky, and they both go after Boogs. Boogs blocks the double whip! Jinder kicks low, whips Boogs, but Boogs ducks and dodges to CLOBBER Jinder! Boogs ducks and dodges to RAM Shanky with shoulders!

Boogs keeps throwing shoulders, dodges again, and CLOBBERS Shanky with a Polish Hammer! Boogs flexes, fans rally up, and Boogs single leg pump handles. He powers through, gets Shanky up, PUMP HANDLE POWERSLAM!! Cover off the #BoogsCruise, Boogs & Nakamura win!

Winners: Shinsuke Nakamura & Rick Boogs, by pinfall

Boogs could be superhuman! Sami complains, but will Nakamura shut his mouth soon enough?

 

Backstage interview with The New Day.

Big E & Kofi Kingston are fired up. How does it feel to be back together again? How does it feel? Does a bear go in the woods? Is a pig’s posterior pork? Kofi says it feels good to be back together, and it will be great to be in the Rumble! Because when one of them wins, we ALL win the Rumble! As far as Moss & Corbin go, OH~ they gonna feel~… Kayla, c’mon. THE POWER~! POWER!!

The New Day VS “Happy” Corbin & “Mad Cap” Moss!

It’s a new day, yes it is! Will Big E & Kofi Kingston be rolling into the Royal Rumble? Or will they have to suffer the horror of being the butt of the joke against these human hyena hybrids?

SmackDown returns and the Happy Folks make their entrance. They’re still laughing about what they did to Drew McIntyre, too. Teams sort out, Big E and Moss start. They tie up, Moss waistlocks but Big E bucks him off. Big E runs, Moss hurdles, things speed up, and Moss runs Big E over! Moss fires up, keeps moving, but Big E hurdles to CLOBBER Moss with an elbow! Cover, TWO! Big E tags Kofi, fans fire up as Kofi runs to leap frog SENTON! Cover, TWO! Kofi drags Moss up, headlocks, but Moss powers out. Corbin tags in, Kofi dodges Moss but Corbin TOSSES Kofi to a corner for a SPLASH!

Corbin shoves Kofi down, drags him up and DECKS him! Corbin stands on Kofi’s head at the ropes, but lets off as the ref counts. Corbin stands Kofi up to TOSS him to another corner. Corbin DECKS Big E, but runs into a SWING KICK! Kofi climbs up and leaps, AX HANDLE! Kofi dropkicks Corbin to a corner but Moss tags in. Moss runs but into a dropkick! The Happy Folks regroup outside, Kofi goes up top! SUPER TRUST FALL, but he’s caught! And POSTED! The New Day is on the bad end of the joke as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Moss stomps away on Kofi in the corner. The ref counts, Moss lets off and tags Corbin. Fans rally for the New Day but the Happy Folks double back suplex. Kofi lands on his feet to KNEE Moss! Kofi slides under Corbin to tag in Big E! OVERHEAD Belly2Belly for Corbin! And then another! And then the SIDE- NO! Corbin pulls Big E’s ear and throat chops him! Moss runs, into an Urenag-E! Big E throws Corbin out but Corbin slides in, for the Belly2Belly! Big E puts Corbin in position, swivels them hips, then runs side to side, for the BIG SPLASH! Big E claps and fans clap along, “NEW! DAY ROCKS!”

Kofi tags in, Big E scoops, but Corbin shoves Big E away! Kofi leaps, into a CHOKE SLAM BACKBREAKER! Tag to Moss, Moss runs in at the corner, and RAMS Kofi! Feed to DEEP SIX! Cover, TWO!! The Happy Folks are pissed now, but Corbin tells Moss to get Kofi up. Moss fireman’s carries, Corbin gets in and runs, but Big E drag shim out! Big E RAMS Corbin into steps, Kofi fights off the carry! BOOTS for Moss, Big E tag sin! Kofi goes up, Big E scoops, MIDNIGHT HOUR!! Cover, New Day wins!

Winners: The New Day, by pinfall

It’s been 18 months since Kofi and Big E were the combo, but they still came out the winners! Will the New Day win one for Xavier Woods in this year’s Royal Rumble?

 

Roman Reigns heads to the ring!

The Tribal Chief has been Universal Champion for 515 days, the fifth longest world title reign behind Pedro Morales, Bob Backlund, Hulk Hogan and Bruno Sammartino. But he’s here to meet the man he’ll face on day 516! Will Roman and Seth Freakin’ Rollins keep from throwing down this close to the Royal Rumble? We find out, after the break.

SmackDown returns and Roman holds up his belt for the pyro. And then, Seth Rollins makes his entrance! Rollins goes to the ring, each man has a mic, and Rollins revels in the dueling chants. Roman says, “Kansas City… Acknowledge me.” Fans are torn on that one, and Rollins says, “You think you’re Patrick Mahomes now? C’mon, man. But I will acknowledge the fact that I played you like a fiddle. And I wanted to thank you for doing the right thing getting your cousins disqualified and making our little affair tomorrow night the way it should be: one on one.”

Roman says it was a simple decision. Either he sat around and let Rollins embarrass them by pinning the Usos, or just punch him in the face and get the same result. Oh, it’s an embarrassment to get pinned by Seth Freakin’ Rollins? In that case, Roman’s brought more shame to his family than anybody! Roman says Rollins is still living in the past. This is 2022. The Tribal Chief is God Mode now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, god mode, okay. But Rollins isn’t living in the past, he’s living for tomorrow. But the past is a good place to start. Remember big moments like the most famous MITB cash-in of all time when Rollins took Roman’s WrestleMania moment away.

Or when Rollins came back from a devastating knee injury, and in his first match back, he pinned Roman to the mat and sent him packing for a 30 day vacay. Water under the bridge. Then what about the time Rollins took a steel chair to Roman’s back and changed the game forever? Ooh, that one stings, doesn’t it? Well Rollins will tell Roman about that moment: when he took that chair and put it in Roman’s back, it was for Roman’s own good! Roman has Rollins to thank for the money, the jets, the vacations and the WrestleMania main event matches!

Roman is the greatest superstar of this generation, right? He’s done it all, right? Beaten ’em all, right? Smashed ’em, stacked ’em, sent ’em packing. Except beat Rollins when it matters most. So it isn’t personal when Rollins takes the title from Roman. “My brother, I will always love you.” Rollins laughs and Roman twitches. Roman paces, and Rollins asks if cat’s got his tongue. Rollins laughs as Roman struggles to find the words. Roman says, “Chair in my back. Breaking up The Shield. I’ve tried to forgive you. I really have. But I’ll never forgive you for what you did to us. I hate you.” Rollins laughs again, because he knows Roman does!

Roman will hate Rollins more! Rollins is the clown? Well Roman’s the joke! The reign is the joke, the family is a joke, the Bloodline, the cousins, his daddy and uncle, all a joke! And it’ll all go up in smoke! HAHAHAHA! Roman SHOVES Rollins! Rollins still laughs it off but Roman shoves him again. Rollins eggs Roman on to hit him more. Roman bumps Rollins on his way out, but tries as sucker Superman Punch! Rollins ducks it! Rollins laughs his way out, and he really might have Roman’s number! Is there anything Roman can do to finally get even with Seth Freakin’ Rollins?


My Thoughts:

A fairly good SmackDown, especially considering when this was a go-home. They had the usual “by the numbers” video they do for the Royal Rumble, but I skipped that, it’s always filler. But I do think that given the stats, Bianca Belair really should get that consecutive Rumble win achievement. Being the first female superstar to go back to back and then the fourth person overall would be huge for The EST. But other than that, there was no real Rumble go-home teaser like a bunch of people being thrown over and out. We didn’t even get a holla holla Six Woman Tag made out of the opening segment’s promo. Charlotte, Natty & Shayna as three Queens taking on Sasha, Aliyah and Shotzi would’ve been great stuff, but nope. Maybe for the post Rumble SmackDown to start towards a title match?

Naomi VS Sonya went about as I expected, with Sonya intimidating the ref and being on the defensive, but it was still a very good match. Naomi wins to get big momentum, but this was her win. Naomi won’t win at the Rumble, though I was expecting Sonya to do something other than just put herself in the match. I almost hope these two start to give the Rumble match a great start. Those two just throwing hands would really get things going. We got a good interaction of Usos and Viking Raiders, but it doesn’t really change anything about their tag title match. I am pretty sure the Usos still win and possibly continue setting things up with the Dudleys.

The tag rematch from Day One was good, and even though Ridge being given the mask was a good way to set up that finish, it was a bit of a hindrance for Ridge the rest of the match since he didn’t fasten it quite right. The Heels win again, maybe they head for the tag titles, maybe not. Sami inviting Jinder & Shanky on the “podcast” was a good move, I like that Sami kept interrupting Jinder and getting on his nerves. I almost thought Jinder was gonna get in Sami’s face about it but then they sent out Nakamura & Boogs. The Faces win the tag match, and again Boogs gets the push by finishing it off. I still don’t really get it. Nakamura VS Sami should’ve been set up for the Rumble since Sami doesn’t like the Saudi Arabia trips, but maybe it’ll be next SmackDown.

The New Day get the main event match, of course, and they get a big win off Corbin & Moss. Now, I get they want to keep Drew McIntyre on our minds, but they really should stop recapping what Corbin & Moss did to him so we’ll be more surprised by whenever it is McIntyre returns. Big E and Kofi are back in the Rumble, I hope they get to go far this time. For all the great moments Kofi has had in the Rumble saving himself, I feel like he should get a chance at being final four. Hell, Big E and Kofi both in the final four, there’s so much there to work with. Them working together, only for them to have to face each other, that’s so good just thinking about it!

As for the final segment, we got pretty good promo stuff out of Rollins and Roman, but it’s so hard to say who is supposed to be Face and Heel in this. Which since WWE always does Face VS Heel, that’s kinda bad. Rollins rubs in all the Heel things he’s done to Roman, but Tribal Chief Roman has been Heel this whole time so maybe this is Heel VS Heel for once? Rollins getting the better of Roman physically and emotionally, Roman has to find a way to beat Rollins all on his own. Or maybe even use Champion’s Advantage, where Rollins still wins but Roman keeps the belt.

My Score: 8.3/10


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Andrew’s IMPACT Sacrifice Results & Match Ratings: 3.24.2023

Well damn, 24 hours changes everything! Josh is injured and has to vacate the World title! Mickie is also injured but she’s making her announcement during the show. How does IMPACT salvage their two main title pictures at Sacrifice?

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Well hot damn, a lot of news popped up in less than 24 hours. So Josh Alexander tore his triceps; so he has to vacate the World Title and he’s being replaced by Steve Maclin in the 6 man match. Mickie James apparently also has an injury, but they are going to turn it into a segment on the show instead of a straight up vacating.

Now from a story perspective this sucks since I loved the Maclin/Alexander segment last night. That’s just me being selfish since I wanted to see that build and Maclin get the big win he deserves. Now he’ll be facing Kushida for the vacated title at Rebellion, and even if Maclin wins it will feel a little flat. Here’s to hoping that when Josh returns from injury they can find a way to bridge the time lost and keep the story going eventually.

Ratings:

  • Speedball Mike Bailey vs Jonathan Gresham: Bailey wins via Reverse Figure Four – *** 3/4
  • Digital Media Championship: Joe Hendry (c) vs Brian Myers: Hendry retains via Standing Ovation – ***
  • Gisele Shaw w/Jai Vidal & Savannah Evans vs Deonna Purrazzo: Deonna wins via Venus de Milo – *** 1/4
  • Kenny King w/Eddie Edwards vs PCO: PCO wins via Straight Right Chair Punch – *** 1/4
  • X Division Championship: Lince Dorado vs Trey Miguel (c): Trey retains via Cradle – *
  • IMPACT Tag Team Titles: TMDK (Shane Haste & Bad Dude Tito) vs Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) (c): Bullet Club retains via ABC 1-2-Sweet – ****
  • Busted Open Match: Bully Ray vs Tommy Dreamer: Bully wins – ** 1/2
  • Time Machine (Kushida, Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley) vs Rich Swann, Frankie Kazarian & Steve Maclin: Kushida wins via Hoverboard Lock – ****

 

Results:

Speedball Mike Bailey vs Jonathan Gresham

With the injuries in the main event, I could definitely see one, or both of these guys; fast tracked into the title scene after Rebellion. And I don’t think anyone would really be mad at that.

A quick tit for tat start, no one really gets any advantage. Just a few quick counters and takeover attempts. They both pause to take in chants from the crowd and then lock up again. Collar and Elbow tie up, they don’t release and both roll one another under the rope and out of the ring. There is an early moment where while he’s against the ropes he pokes Speedball in the eye and then apologizes. So things go back to a technical face vs face, but it could be a precursor.

Technical catch wrestling continues. Wrestling one another down, trying to get positions for small submission picks or limb attacks, but nothing is sticking yet. Gresham does manage to an Indian Deathlock, and then a Reverse Figure Four that Gresham conveniently can’t untangle so the referee has to do it and Bailey is pissed. Gresham tries to explain it, but Bailey lights him up, Gresham falls out of the ring, Golden Triangle Moonsault and now the aggression is starting to pick up. Hamstring Kicks and Chops from Bailey, but Gresham baits the attack and trips up Bailey before attacking the left knee with a grin on his face. Bailey is grounded for a while and Gresham keeps trying to twist off his leg. Eventually some Up Kicks break the submission attempt but Gresham wrestles him down again into a Bow and Arrow Trailer Hitch kind of move. Since Bailey has Tanahashi next week, Gresham must be trying to make Bailey’s knees equal. Good Guy Gresham.

Bailey starts stringing some offense together, but a few Low Dropkicks ruins Bailey’s base and causes him to face plant and the offense is going nowhere. Gresham even goes for the pinfall by trying to hyper extend the leg he’s been working on. Strikes continue to trade, Gresham tries to shoot the half but Bailey kicks off, Hamstring Kick again, Gresham Kips Up but clutches the leg a little, a chance for Speedball but Gresham cradles him to the ground and locks in a Figure Four. Speedball eventually rolls to the apron, Gresham tries to continue the stretching but Bailey kicks him into the post, sweeps the leg and Moonsault Double Knees right on Gresham’s head; Bailey went full Billy Kidman with his offense.

Bailey and Gresham continue to jockey for position on the outside, it looks like it might be a double count out. Gresham gets in at 9, Bailey gets in right at the 10 and the referee allows the match to continue. Some quick offense, Tornado Kicks to the corner, Ultima Weapon misses, Gresham goes for the Figure Four again but Speedball reverses it and Gresham taps pretty quick.

Backstage segment with Brian Myers, Moose joins and says he’ll help him beat Hendry – but then Santino shows up! He tells Moose he’s dumb and just stooged himself out, so he’s banning him from ringside. Who would’ve thunk it, the comedy character brings the logic. 

Digital Media Championship: Joe Hendry (c) vs Brian Myers

Myers powders after a few early bumps and then Hendry follows him. Hendry is definitely not fighting with “champion’s advantage”, as is the way for babyfaces. Myers tries to fight back on the floor but a Scoop Slam leaves Myers on the receiving end. Hendry has to roll in to reset the 10 count and Myers catches him.

A few quick attacks, Roster Cut attempt but Hendry gets the goozle on. Standing Ovation attempt but Myers slips it, Chop Block, and continues to hammer down on Hendry. Myers with a Falcon Arrow and a bunch of slightly arrogant offense until he goes for the Crossbody, gets caught again, Sack of Shit, and Hendry is back on the offensive. Pop Up Power – no, slips and a Running Spear from Myers for a 2 count. Myers hits the top rope but Hendry cuts him off, Myers pushes him off, launches and Hendry hits the RKO mid move! Throws Myers into the ropes, Standing Ovation, and Hendry retains!

So Mickie addresses her injury, it seems she broke a rib during the tag match. They are allowing Mickie to hold on to the title until Rebellion. Either she defends it in a 3 way versus Jordynne and the winner of the 4 Way at the Multiverse United show or Jordynne will face the winner of the 4 Way for the vacated title. 

Gisele Shaw w/Jai Vidal & Savannah Evans vs Deonna Purrazzo

Deonna starts off angry, Gisele is getting rocked early, they go through a few rope running counter cradles and slides but its just early counter wrestling. Gisele manages to surprise Deonna going for an Armbar, but Deonna counters it, tries the Venus de Milo but Shaw powders. Deonna hits the Baseball Slide, starts beating on Gisele but she slides back in to distract the referee while Savannah clocks Deonna.

Triplicate European Uppercuts from Gisele keep her very comfortably in control. Another distraction to the ref and Savannah swings and connects with Deonna again. Deonna tries to fight from the corner, Gisele grabs Deonna’s feet drapes her across the ropes and drops both knees on Deonna. Gisele drives her knee into Deonna’s shoulder blades and goes for the Chin Lock. Deonna tries to power out, Gisele stifles it a little, but Deonna catches her with a Twisting Neckbreaker. Slow start to the strike exchange but it slowly picks up, Deonna with a beautiful spot of a no look Back Kick right to Gisele’s stomach, Running Knee Lift into the Russian Leg Sweep for 2. Deonna Pump Kick, Gisele Superkick, Deonna bounces off the ropes, Flatliner into Koji Clutch, but Gisele slides back a little to turn it into a pinfall to break the submission.

Both women have wrist control and just swing at each other. Deonna gets the best, one big swing but Gisele ducks it, catches Deonna in Shock and Awe (Backbreaker into Flatliner). Denouement attempt, Deonna grabs at the arm for the Fujiwara attempt but Gisele fights it off. Venus de Milo gets locked in and Deonna holds it a little longer to make a point.

Savannah attacks Deonna afterwards, but Tasha Steelz music hits. Tasha tries to play nice like she’s here to help Savannah, then cheap shots her, fights off Jai with a Tornado DDT kicking off of Savannah. Okurr on Jai and Tasha cleans house and babyfaces herself. 

Kenny King w/Eddie Edwards vs PCO

Kenny comes out in an Honor No More shirt, which is a nice way to play into the story. 

Eddie tries to get PCO’s attention and then Kenny attacks him right as the bell rings. PCO turns things around shortly, Eddie keeps trying to find angles to give Kenny ambush spots but PCO keeps fighting back. PCO stalks Eddie on the outside and Kenny hits a beautiful Tornillo, then a Scoop Slam as he mocks the whole Frankenstein gimmick. PCO rolls in and Kenny John Woo’s him into the corner and starts Bootwashing his face to talk smack. PCO fires, goozle and just throws Kenny out of the ring.

PCO kicks Kenny from getting back in the ring, looks to do his Senton but “short circuits”. So PCO does a Senton to the wrong side of the ring, crashing but popping right back up, and it apparently helped correct the issue. So Senton onto Kenny, throws him back in, Kenny tries the Eddy Gordo kick but PCO just barrels over him.  PCO drapes Kenny in the corner, Codebreaker, into the back of the head Guillotine Leg Drop and now PCO pulls him to the apron.

Here we go, Deanimator attempt – but Eddie cuts him off, PCO kicks him back into the cameras, Kenny gets up and an Iconoclasm bouncing off the apron of the ring! Kenny throws him into the steps, rolls in, things he’s all but won…yet PCO beats the 10 count. “He’s Not Human” chant starts, Frog Splash from Kenny and PCO kicks out and fires at 2. Eddie throws a Kendo stick in the ring to distract the referee from Kenny using a chair. Kenny hits PCO once, PCO shakes it off and has a gameplan. So he actually helps keep the referee distracted to bait in Kenny for another chairshot attempt, but PCO just punches through the chair and knocks out Kenny.

Maclin, Kaz and Rich have a backstage segment. It perfectly shows the story beats of Maclin being annoyed that he put in all this prep and recon on Josh just for the opponent to be flipped. Typical tumultuous team members vibe, but Maclin gets his story beats across beautifully.

X Division Championship: Lince Dorado vs Trey Miguel (c)

Okay Lince comes out in a bathrobe with some cringe ass “Lucha Lit” gimmick. I…hate it. This is probably the first time ever that I want Trey to win. Cause Dorado is cringe as hell. In a game of them both sucking, I’ll pick the style of trash that I can tolerate more…which is Trey. 

Lucha counter wrestling with flips over trips and that stupid ass Mirrored Dropkick Spot. I also don’t love the Lince doing the cat mannerisms, but Puma King and a few others have done that…so I guess its more tolerated in Lucha. This whole match has been a little paint by numbers boring Lucha where the moves are done just to pop the crowd but not to actually accomplish anything.

Diving whatever moves they accomplish nothing. Its really hard for me to care about flippy trash matches. Lince hits 2 of the 3 step Moonsaults, but Trey of course no sells and dodges the third, Tiger Wall Kick, but Trey stumbles a little for the Enzuigiri, Trey also hits a sloppy Outside In Tiger Feint…its just sloppy spots for spots sake. I would probably be more entertained if I had Runescape fired up on a different tab. This is just a waste of space, much like both “wrestlers”.

Lince hits a Avalanche Frankensteiner, into a Shooting Star Press but Trey powders. Lince tries that bounce off the corner with his legs spot, but its sloppy. Another sloppy Tiger Feint from Trey, Slingshot Sunset Bomb for 2. These are just stupid moves for stupid sake. Lince tries to cut off Trey from a rope run with a Big Boot but mostly misses, makes the whole cut off exchange look stupid. Trey with a flash cradle during the cut offs for pinfall. Eww…this was garbage.

IMPACT Tag Team Titles: TMDK (Shane Haste & Bad Dude Tito) vs Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) (c)

It is nice to see a variation of TMDK back together. I also enjoyed Tito called Ace and Bey the “Mini Bullet Club” since they’re the juniors heavyweights.

 Tito and Bey start off, Bey is trying to show off his speed, Tito gets across the power though. Tito kinda looks like a young Scott Steiner, and he literally tosses Bey back into his corner. Ace tags in, tries to do something but Tito is just too strong. Haste gets tagged in for some flashy yet effective offense. Ace finds something with the Triangle Victory Roll, Bey blind tag, cheap shot on Tito, Russian Leg Sweep + Low Sweep combination into some Click Click Boom. So Bullet Club is showing very nice Junior style synergy. Haste is very loud and animated, so he’s a great one to have eating the offense. Especially when they do their Back Rake goof spot.

Haste finally maneuvers things to tag Tito in, and Haste hands off Ace to Tito and Tito hits a Standing Blue Thunder Bomb. Tree of Woe, Bey tries to come in to break up the spot but the referee is distract, Tito steps up and stands on the groin, nice homage to Petey Williams. We are in Canada. Announce team almost sets up too much meme fodder, and then Rehwoldt steers into it. Rehwoldt said Bey was trying to rush into to get Tito off…paused for a second, which you know Hannifan gave him a look. So then they just pivot to everyone in TMDK being like Australian Sex Pistols. Very clever misdirection.

The match is fun, Bey gets the hot tag, clocks everyone, Haste tries a Lariat, Bey ducks that, flies onto Tito on the outside, comes back in, Tornado Fameasser for 2. Bullet Club goes for a Torture Rack/Triangle Kick combo, but Haste gets out of it. Tito gets tagged in and he start to look like Steve Williams with the Doctor Bomb for 2. Tito hits a big battering ram Dive on Bey to clear him out. Haste Falcon Arrow, Tito Froggy Splash, but Bey breaks it up.

Tito starts getting ping ponged between the two Juniors, Torture Rack/Triangle Kick combination, for 1-2-3? – no Haste comes in the referee says it was in time to stop the 3 count. Tito charges and a beautifully times Superkick + Spinning Back Heel Kick on Tito. He’s dazed, ABC 1-2-Sweet! Bullet Club retain!

Busted Open Match: Bully Ray vs Tommy Dreamer

This is a First Blood Match for anyone who doesn’t know, and Dreamer comes out with an ECW Championship Belt. 

Chair duel to start things, ECW replica belt to the face of Bully Ray. Dreamer grabs a soda from a fan, Muta mist on Bully, tries to shove the can into his skull for early blood but no. Bully crotches Dreamer on the guardrail and then picks a fight with Darren McCarty who’s in the crowd. Darren McCarty was the enforcer for the Detroit Red Wings, so its very old school letting the ex sports guy play. Bully also has a great spot where he pulls out a step ladder, then asks the referee to hold it, does the Jimmy Snuka pose and goes for a Splash and misses. Bully gets to rile up AEW and WWF fans all in one spot. Good old school heat. Corny, but good.

Dreamer gets a bag of tacks, Bully fights off the Piledriver, gets the cheese grater but Dreamer hits the Bionic Elbow as a counter. Cheese grater with Dreamer, Dreamer charges, Bully pulls the referee in the corner, so ref bump. Dreamer eventually makes contact with the cheese grater, but there’s no referee and Bully has his back to the  camera, so it slow rolls the result nicely. Good Hands hit the ring, on with a towel to see if he can blot the bleeding before the ref comes to.

Bully hits Tommy with pocket tacks instead of pocket sand. Tries to drive Dreamer’s face into the tacks and then Elbow it further down but Dreamer moves. Dreamer grabs the grater again, Bully tries to beg off, screams he’s sorry and now tries to guilt Tommy with his family is going to see this. Dreamer actually stops and then Bully hits him in the balls. Bully busts open Tommy with the tacks, the Good Hands slide in Tommy as the referee comes to, so the referee only sees Dreamer bleeding. Its a solid old school Hardcore match but it was definitely a little too plodding and corny.

Yuya Uemura tries to make the save, then Darren McCarty jumps the railing. This really has turned into ECW, Bully gets a mic, asks him if he really wants to fight and tells security to let him go. LOL – a literal Hockey Fight. McCarty gets the best of things, Good Hands mug him from behind. Triple Powerbomb McCarty through the table. 

Scott D’Amore’s music hits! Scott starts stripping like he’s Ric Flair. Bully calls down Scott, but Scott has backup. He calls Rino, Heath, Gresham, Baily and Joe Hendry.  Good Hands try to attack Scott…Scott stops him…and HITS A CANADIAN DESTROYER! Can this lead to a Lethal Lockdown match? Team D’Amore versus Team Bully? Give me that…give me some Lethal Lockdown now! 

Time Machine (Kushida, Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley) vs Rich Swann, Frankie Kazarian & Steve Maclin

Shelley and Swann start off, and its just a bit of chain wrestling. They both have Hammerlocks, Headlocks, and just twist around to try and find an angle. Shelley speeds things up a little, Shoulder Tackle, rope run, Swann goes down and Shelley puts on the brakes to sink in a quick STF but Rich grabs the rope. Kaz and Sabin tag in and we get some Battle of the Futures nostalgia.

Back and forth, Up and Over, Sabin with the Arm Drag into the Top Wristlock. Kaz fights through, a little more quick counters and fun stalemate spots as they are all having fun with each other. Kushida tags in and points to Maclin. Kaz slaps Maclin’s chest and we all know Maclin isn’t a fun loving babyface like Kaz and Swann, so the tone should start to change. Kushida starts by starting Grounded ala Inoki vs Ali, then manages to trip up Maclin and keep the mat wrestling going, but Maclin finally gets back to hit feet and can finally use his size and power to  his advantage. Shelley blind tag, Time Splitters PK to the Arm combo.

Shelley keeps on the arm that got kicks with the Arm Wringer and then a few quick shots to the damaged arm. Kaz makes the blind tag after Maclin uses the middle rope into Shelley’s throat. Kaz and Rich with a little Hip Toss tandem stuff for a near fall on Shelley. But the tone of Rich and Kaz is definitely much different. Shelley fights his way out of the enemy corner, Time Machine triple team, Single Leg Crab, Camel Clutch, Sliding Dropkick from Sabin onto Rich. Kaz is trying to police too much of Maclin’s motion, typical team that doesn’t get along stuff. Rich driven into Kaz in the corner, triple Dropkicks from all of Time Machine.

Kushida tags in, stares down Maclin and then Maclin picks up and throws Rich to Time Machine because you can tell he’s frustrated getting policed with all of his moves. MCMG hold Rich, Kushida hits the Baseball Slide on the restrained wrestler and Kushida does the little Liger spin around pose/taunt and stares down Maclin. Shelley starts with the joint manipulation, and Swann is just getting torn apart. Swann in the Tree of Woe, Sliding Dropkick to Swann’s face, and then the Triple Baseball Slide. Sabin tags in with the Octopus Hold on Rich which he rolls into a pinfall, but Rich kicks out. You hear Maclin say “All you have to do is tag me bitch” – which proves that Maclin is trying to be a team player in his own way.

Rich fights out of the triple team, and chooses to tag in Kaz. Kaz hot tag, exchanges with Sabin which turns into the Guillotine Leg Drop through the ropes, Kaz is taking out everyone right now. Two Springboard Leg Drops…and now a third as all of the Time Machine offense is stopped. Sabin blind tag though gives Time Machine some momentum. Rich tries to come in, gets rocked, Maclin charges, Sabin grabs him and Tornado DDT sends Maclin to powder. Missile Dropkick/Flatliner on Kaz for 2.

Cradle Shock counter, rolling tag to Rich. Avalanche Headscissors, Rich goes to the top rope, Maclin tags himself in, but Time Machine gets rolling. Dragon Screw from Kushida with the Mutoh pose afterwards. Maclin and Shelley are legal, and going back and forth. Double Arm Breaker from Shelley after Kaz tries to get involved. Maclin gets some offense back in, Caught in the Crosshairs form Maclin, Maclin tags in Kaz, Kaz tags Rich, tandem attacks, Cutter form Rich into a 450…1-2-Kushida Kicks out! Swann goes for Phoenix Splash but misses. Flying Armbar from Kushida, triple Submission spot, but Maclin gets out of his and breaks Kushida’s submission. Maclin stares down Time Machine, hits the ropes and gets eaten alive by tandem attacks.

Time Machine goes for a Double Shiranui Tower, but it gets broken up. Outatime lands on Kaz. Sliced Bread lands on Swann. Tanaka Punch blocked, Maclin eats Shell Shock, Sabin gives Kushida a rolling start to throw him onto Maclin like a Spider Monkey and sink in the Hoverboard Lock. Maclin taps relatively quick, which is strategic to not risk injury.

Overall Score: 7/10

Talk about a show that no one knew what the hell to expect! Josh vacating the belt means that things had to change with fairly short notice. Mickie’s implications of either a Triple threat or she’ll hand over the belt to the winner if she’s not cleared is something you don’t see too often. But when it comes down to the card, the show was relatively good. Trey & Lince was hot garbage, and Busted Open was what we all kind of expected. Was it a bit more entertaining with some of the ECW nods? Sure. But it was just a spectacle and honestly Scott D’Amore hitting the Canadian Destroyer made that all worth it.

The tag and six man matches were the best stuff on the card, and sets the stage decently well for storylines into Rebellion. I’m not joking though, if we don’t get Team D’Amore vs Team Bully in a Lethal Lockdown…the salt will pour. Don’t let the Canadian Destroyer spot be for naught! Oh – and put the damn belt on Maclin!


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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (3/24/23)

It’s a family feud!

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Wrestling really does have more than one royal family.

While Cody Rhodes is back on SmackDown to take on Ludwig Kaiser, Dominik Mysterio plans on confronting in his entire family in Las Vegas! Will Rey finally snap on his son?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Cody Rhodes VS Ludwig Kaiser w/ Giovanni Vinci; Cody wins.
  • Rey Mysterio VS LA Knight; Knight wins.
  • WrestleMania Women’s Tag Team Showcase Qualifier: Lacey Evans & Xia Li VS Shotzi Blackheart & Natalya; Shotzi & Natalya win and advance to WrestleMania.
  • “Butch” Pete Dunne w/ The Brawling Brutes VS GUNTER; Gunther wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Cody Rhodes VS Ludwig Kaiser w/ Giovanni Vinci!

The American Nightmare is back on SmackDown, looking to stay razor sharp for his match with the Tribal Chief. But will he get more than just a tune-up from the Impeccable German? Or will Kaiser keep the mat sacred?

The bell rings and the two circle. Fans rally up for “CODY! CODY!” Ludwig eggs Cody on, they tie up, and they’re in a deadlock. Cody powers Ludwig to a corner but Ludwig turns it around. Ludwig lets off, but throws a body shot! Ludwig whips, Cody reverses and reels Ludwig in to suplex! Fans fire up as Cody keeps Ludwig in the air, before the GOURD BUSTER! But wait, here comes Paul Heyman. Cody is distracted by the Wise Man, Ludwig waistlocks, but Cody trips Ludwig to then SHINING WIZARD! Ludwig bails out while Cody glances back at Heyman. Fans continue to rally for Cody while SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Cody staggers over to Ludwig. Ludwig UPPERCUTS then COMPLETE SHOTS! Cover, TWO! Ludwig scowls, and he rains down fists in a headlock! Fans boo but Ludwig lets off. Ludwig clamps onto Cody with a chinlock, then CLUBS him down. Fans boo as Ludwig goes outside to drag Cody to the corner, but Cody YANKS Ludwig into the post! Cody goes out to CHOP Ludwig, ROCKS him, and then CHOPS him against the announce desk! Cody rains down fists and fans fire up! Cody puts Ludwig back in the ring, runs and springboards, but Ludwig trips him up and YANKS him down!

Heyman is stoic as Ludwig sits Cody up to PENALTY KICK! Cover, TWO! Cody scowls but Ludwig looms over him. Ludwig pie faces Cody, drags him up but Cody ROCKS Ludwig and JABS and throws a body shot. Ludwig throat chops in return! Ludwig CHOKES Cody on the ropes, the ref counts and Ludwig lets off. Fans boo, but Vinci gets a cheap shot! Cover, TWO! Ludwig clamps back on with a chinlock. Cody endures, fans rally up, and Cody fights up to his feet. Ludwig throws Cody down by his hair! Fans boo more as Ludwig paces around and taunts Cody. Ludwig rains down more fists, then scrapes Cody’s face!

Ludwig runs to BASEMENT UPPERCUT! Cover, TWO! Heyman is still stoic as Cody drags himself to ropes. Ludwig kicks the ropes to jam Cody’s arm! Ludwig drags Cody up to UPPERCUT! Cody ROCKS Ludwig with forearm after forearm! Ludwig JAWBREAKERS! Ludwig throws body shots and stomps in the corner, whips corner to corner, then runs in, but Cody puts him on the apron! Cody ROCKS Ludwig, and BEAUTIFUL DISASTER KICKS Ludwig down! Fans fire up and Heyman is upset now. Ludwig staggers up into a kick, and Cody reels Ludwig in! Cody hooks the arms, but now SOLO SIKOA appears!

Fans boo as the Bloodline approaches, but Ludwig CHOP BLOCKS Cody’s leg! Solo and Heyman stay at the ramp as Ludwig goes out. Cody throws hands, whips, but Ludwig reverses and sends Cody crashing into steel steps! Fans boo but Cody drags himself up, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Cody throws hands on Ludwig. Ludwig headlocks, Cody powers out and things speed up, but DOUBLE LARIATS take both men down! Solo & Heyman are now ringside as fans rally up. Vinci coaches Ludwig but Cody sits up first. They stand, Cody throws a body shot but Ludwig throws a haymaker. Cody throws a forearm, Ludwig gives it back, they go shot for shot, back and forth, faster and faster, and fans fire up! Ludwig kicks low, whips, but Cody reverses to then follow and CLOBBER Ludwig! Cody kicks, RHODES UPPERCUT! Cody then baits Ludwig, goes up and over in a corner, and POWERSLAMS! Cover, TWO!

Solo is stoic, Heyman smiles, but then Vinci throws in his track jacket. The ref gets that out of the way, but misses the HIGH LOW COMBO from Imperium! Cover, TWO!! Cody survives and Ludwig is surprised. Ludwig shouts “NEIN!” and runs in to UPPERCUT, GAMANGIRI and HALF HATCH SUPLEX! Ludwig goes up top, leaps, but into a dragon sleeper! But Ludwig drops to victory roll! TWO, and Cody dodges Ludwig to springboard, CODY CUTTER! Fans fire up as Cody stares down Heyman & Solo! Cody waits on Ludwig, reels him back in, CROSS RHODES!! Cover, Cody wins!

Winner: Cody Rhodes, by pinfall

The Impeccable German was less than perfect, and he loses to the American Nightmare! But Cody watches Solo get up on the apron and Heyman has the mic. Heyman has Solo stand down, and then tells Cody, “You’re owed an apology. And since I’m the Wise Man of the Bloodline, may I? I am going to be the one to deliver that apology to you.” The ring announcer did a lousy job. She must be from Vegas. Fans boo and Heyman acts surprised. But Heyman will do the honors. “Ladies and gentlemen! Your winner… and still challenger for the reigning! Defending! Undisputed! WWE Universal Heavyweight Champion, Roman Reigns… Cody! RRRRHODES!”

Fans are torn but Heyman says this is the very same Cody Rhodes that sees his Road to WrestleMania with a giant pothole in front of him that happens this Monday Night Raw, when Cody goes one versus one against… SOLO! And if, and isn’t that a big “if,” IF Cody survives Solo, then it’s not the Road to WrestleMania. All roads lead to Roman Reigns, who will be here live on SmackDown next Friday to see Cody one final time face to face. Heyman tosses the mic to Cody and he catches it. “Is that what we’re doing, Mr. Heyman? Are you moving the goal posts for me? Another thing you did, you interrupted them while they were singing the song.

“And now, you wanna move the goal posts and move ’em right here, huh? Am I expected to say ‘No?’ Oh, it’s six days out from the biggest match in the history of my family, I should probably say no, right? WELL, I probably shouldn’t have wrestled with half my body hanging off, and I still beat Seth Rollins! So when it comes to you,” he says as he points at Solo, “undefeated and as good as you are, like I said last week. You’re. Not. Ready!” Fans chant that, then Cody continues.

“And as for the champion, Roman Reigns. After Solo finds out that he’s not ready, at WrestleMania on April 2nd, your boy, Roman Reigns, the Undisputed WWE Universal Champion, will find out the same thing. He is not ready, either!” Cody throws the mic back and Heyman misses it! Will everything about this homestretch to Hollywood be a nightmare for The Bloodline?

 

BREAKING NEWS for WrestleMania!

The very first match of night one on Saturday, April 1st will be… AUSTIN THEORY VS JOHN CENA! The United States Championship will set the pace for the weekend, will The Now find that he’s not ready, either?

 

Charlotte Flair is here!

Vegas fires up as The Queen heads to the ring. The SmackDown Women’s Champion has her pyro then gets the mic to tell Las Vegas, “We are just eight days away from WrestleMania! Fourteen times. Fourteen time world champion. And I can tell you, that was not built on fear, insecurities or nepotism. The same three things have been used against me by everyone, and I mean everyone, since I started in this business.

“Fear. What is fear? Fear is a lack of understanding. It’s ignorance. This business wasn’t built on fear. This business was built on respect! Rhea Ripley, I don’t fear you. I respect you! The only thing that I fear is my own potential. I respected Nikki and Brie. I respect Sasha, Bayley, Becky, Trish, Ronda, Asuka, Natty! I respected all of them! Insecurities. Damn right I have insecurities! Are you really ‘whatting’ me? This is important to me so listen. Insecurities, damn right I have them. And I have built this house on every brick that all of you have thrown at me! For the last seven YEARS! Lastly, nepotism.” Fans “WOO~!”

“That’s right, Vegas. I love my dad. And I will never apologize for continuing the greatest legacy in sports entertainment! And whether you like it or don’t like it, you better learn to love it, because diamonds are forever, and so is Charlotte Flair. WOO~!” The Queen is fired up, but will she be able to hold her throne at WrestleMania?

 

Rey Mysterio VS LA Knight!

The King of Lucha Libre, the headliner of this year’s WWE Hall of Fame class, has been pushed and pushed and pushed by his punk of a son, and the Mega Star was one big mouth too far! Will Rey be able to shut up the obnoxious jerk that isn’t Dominik? Or will things only get worse for Rey on the Road to WrestleMania Weekend?

SmackDown returns and Knight makes his entrance. The bell rings and the two circle. Knight chases Rey but Rey dodges and fires off hands! Knight shoves Rey away, but Rey slides under and dropkicks Knight to a corner. Rey runs in but Knight fights off the monkey flip. But Rey avoids the elbow drop! Rey runs in, and now he MONKEY FLIPS! Knight staggers up,. Rey KICKS Knight to a corner, and then rains down fists! Fans count all the way to TEN, then Rey gives us some Latino Heat. Rey runs, but Knight FLAPJACKS him down! Knight stomps Rey, stomps him to ropes, but the ref counts.

Knight lets off, “YEAH!” Then he bumps Rey off a buckle. Knight throws hands, JABS Rey, then digs his boots in. The ref counts, Knight lets off at 4, and Knight brings Rey up. Knight shoves Rey into the corner, Rey bounces off buckles, and into the NECKBREAKER! Knight spells it out, “L! A! KNIGHT! YEAH!” Cover, ONE!! Knight is annoyed and he throws fists down. Knight keeps on Rey, throws hands, then he bumps Rey off buckles. Fans rally and duel, but Knight whips Rey to ropes. Rey ducks ‘n’ dodges then tilt-o-whirls to RANA! Knight flounders out of the ring and fans fire up!

Rey runs, WRECKS Knight with a dropkick, then he builds speed. Rey SLIDES to SPLASH! Fans fire up for that one, and Rey stalks Knight to CLUB him! Rey puts Knight in the ring, climbs up and shoulders in! Then he GAMANGIRIS Knight away, climbs the corner, but here comes Dom! Dom said he’d ruin the fun, and Knight trips Rey up! Rey tumbles to the mat, but Dom doesn’t care. Fans boo as Dom walks down the ramp while SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Knight stomps away on Rey again. Knight drags Rey up but Rey throws hands! Rey fires off but Knight knees low! Knight scoops, Rey slips off and rolls Knight up, to then dropkick! Fans fire up while Knight scrambles around. Knight goes after Rey, Rey slips under and runs, but into a BOOT! Cover, TWO! Dom paces at ringside, and Knight sits Rey up to KNEE him in the back! Knight drags Rey up, back suplexes high and hard, then dusts off his hands. “YEAH!” Knight grins as he stands over Rey, then he pulls on the mask. The ref reprimands, Knight whips Rey to ropes, but Rey ducks ‘n’ dodges!

Rey CROSSBODIES, but Knight catches him for a POWERSLAM! Dom smirks while Knight spells it out again. “L! A! KNIGHT! YEAH!” But Rey avoids the elbow drop! Rey and Knight slowly stand up, Rey goes to ropes and Knight storms over, but into an elbow! Rey springboards, wheelbarrows and BULLDOGS! Dom is annoyed but Rey goes to the apron. Rey climbs up, SEATED SENTONS! And Rey keeps moving, SPRINGBOARD CROSSBODY! Cover, TWO! Knight is still in this but Rey brings him up to whip him to ropes. Knight reverses, kicks low and back suplexes, but Rey lands on his feet! Tilt-o-whirl, but Knight blocks to a BACKPACK SLAM! Cover, TWO!

Knight grows frustrated but he drags Rey back up. Fans rally for “619! 619!” as Knight scoops, but Rey turns slam into DDT! Rey then dropkicks Knight onto the ropes! Fans fire up, Rey dials it up, 619 BLOCKED by Knight! Knight grins, lifts Rey up, but Rey RANAS free! Rey redials, but Dom trips him up!! Fans boo and Rey is furious! He can’t believe Dom is doing this now, but Knight rolls Rey up! KNIGHT WINS!!

Winner: LA Knight, by pinfall

Dom smiles because he just screwed his dad over. Dom gets the mic and tells, “Jefe… You gonna give me what I want? Huh? C’mon. C’mon Or are you gonna run away? Or are you gonna finally be a man and face me at WrestleMania?” Dom pushes Rey, and Rey brings down the straps. To wag his finger, “No.” Dom says, “That’s right. Walk away like you always do. Hey, mom. How does it feel to be married to such a pathetic loser? A coward who can’t even stand up to his own son?” Fans boo but then Dom points out the rest of the family. He asks if mom knew she married a deadbeat.

She did, because here’s why. She sat there every night while Rey abandoned Dom, sot hat makes her no better! His sister steps up now, and Dom asks Aalyah what she’s gonna do about it. She’s too stupid to understand this. Mom Angie snatches the mic from Dom but Dom snatches it back to tell her to shut up! Rey storms back over and fans fire up! Dom dares Rey to do something, and Rey DECKS Dom!! Dom is shocked but Vegas is thunderous! Rey tells Dom that Dom pushed him to do this. Rey doesn’t wanna do this but Dom gave him no choice! You do not disrespect your mother like that! That is Rey’s wife!

Dom wanted a fight at Mania? Then he’s on!! Fans are thunderous again as Rey says, “I’ll see you at WrestleMania, son.” Dom scurries away, having gotten what he wanted like the brat he is. But will Dom come to regret everything he’s done these past few months?

 

WrestleMania Women’s Tag Team Showcase Qualifier: Lacey Evans & Xia Li VS Shotzi Blackheart & Natalya!

The Model Soldier teams with The Predator to take on the Wild Child and the Queen of Harts! Liv Morgan & Raquel Rodriguez are watching ringside, who will they see join them in this Fatal 4 Way tag team showcase?

The teams sort out, Shotzi and Lacey start. Fans rally as Shotzi and Lacey circle, then Shotzi gets around to a waistlock. Shotzi ripcords, wrenches and wristlocks but Lacey throws Shotzi by her hair! Cover, TWO! Lacey drags Shotzi up and fans rally as Lacey whips her to the corner. Lacey RAMS into Shotzi, tags Xia, and then mocks the fans. Xia stomps Shotzi, brings her up to CHOP, then taunts Natty. Xia runs in to KNEE and ELBOW Shotzi, then reels her in for an EXPLODER! Cover, TWO! Natty rallies the fans behind Shotzi but Lacey tells them to shut up. Xia bumps Shotzi off buckles and tags in Lacey.

Lacey mocks the fans, then runs to headstand and BRONCO BUSTER! Lacey drags Shotzi up, snapmares and then dribbles Shotzi’s face off the mat! Cover, TWO! Fans rally but Lacey drags Shotzi up. Shotzi throws hands, kicks but Lacey blocks to trip her up! Lacey then sucker punches Natty! Fans boo but Shotzi rolls Lacey up! TWO and Shotzi ENZIGURIS Lacey down! But Natty is still off the corner so Shotzi has to BOOT Lacey away! Shotzi runs but Lacey CLOBBERS her! Cover, TWO! Fans rally up but Lacey tags Xia. Lacey & Xia drag Shotzi up, double whip but Shotzi KICKS Xia and JAWBREAKERS Lacey!

Xia waistlocks Shotzi, Lacey storms up, but Shotzi slips free and the WOMAN’S RIGHT takes out Xia!! Lacey is furious, but Shotzi whips her out of the ring! Shotzi swings on Lacey, Lacey counter punches, but Natty is back! Natty BOOTS Lacey, then Shotzi DIVES to take Lacey down! Fans fire up as Shotzi hurries back in and tags Natty! HART ATTACK! And then the SHARPSHOOTER! Xia taps, Natty & Shotzi win!

Winners: Shotzi Blackheart & Natalya, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)

Two hearts and a lot of fire, these two make it through! But wait, here come Ronda & Shayna! Shayna says, “Look at all the history in the ring right now! I mean, each single one of those women has a reason to want to get revenge on us, right? Let’s look. Broken hand, broken nose, broken arm, broken spirit. What do you say we uh… Give them the opportunity tonight?” Fans fire up as the Baddest Women on the Planet step up, but then Ronda says, “Wait, Shay-Bayz. I’ve got a question for you. How many times have we sold out this exact arena?” A couple times. And what about this entire town? A couple more times.

And how much did they appreciate it? ZERO TIMES! These two have given Vegas more than it deserves, so never again! And certainly not tonight. Shayna agrees with that. But lucky for the others, or maybe unlucky, these two are here to let them know, they’re in the tag team showcase! WrestleMania may be taking place in Hollywood, but the stakes just got raised like here in Vegas! Who wins when the odds are not in their favor?

 

Drew McIntyre heads to the ring.

Vegas fires up as the Scottish Warrior, Celtic Warrior and Der Ring General are about to converge for a contract signing! The Triple Threat for the Intercontinental Championship isn’t until WrestleMania, but will things break down on SmackDown?

SmackDown returns and Adam Pearce is in the ring to welcome us to this contract signing. But before he can introduce McIntyre, Sheamus and the Brawling Brutes make their way out! “Las Vegas, what’s the crack?” Sheamus says everyone’s been asking why he’s so mad at McIntyre. Imagine this: imagine working 15 YEARS of your life to achieve a particular goal; now imagine telling your best friend about that goal, only for him to go behind your back to try and steal it away from you. Imagine that friend being someone you let sleep and live on your couch, that you brought to his first training session in this business!

McIntyre rolls his eyes as Sheamus has said a lot of this before. Sheamus says, “Now imagine getting the opportunity to smash that person’s face in on the Grandest Stage of Them All, because they’re nothing but a backstabbing-” McIntyre says, “Imagine shutting up for a second. Every week, you run your mouth, you try to give me this guilt trip, trying to make me feel bad. And if it’s not on SmackDown, it’s on social medial with your little gifs and memes you create, blow up my Twitter like a teenage girl. It’s embarrassing, mate!”

McIntyre says last week, they were in this ring, proving why they are the most physical superstars in the WWE! They beat the hell out of each other! And afterwards, they should’ve been in the bar, laughing about it. That’s what they did in the old times. But now, Sheamus is so sensitive, he has this temper, that Sheamus can’t separate personal and business. Sheamus says McIntyre made this personal! McIntyre has a lot he’d love to say but he’ll stick to facts. And the facts are: McIntyre has beaten Sheamus, and he KNOWS he can beat Gunther. And history has shown that Sheamus can’t. Fans fire up as the two stare down.

Pearce has both men stand down because in order to get to WrestleMania, he needs three signatures on the contract. So how about we get the first two taken care of now? McIntyre takes the pen, signs his part, and then hands things over to Sheamus. Sheamus takes another pen, he signs his part, and then McIntyre throws his pen to the crowd as a free souvenir. And here comes GUNTHER! Gunther storms right into the ring, he gets right in Pearce’s face, and he tells Pearce to justify this decision. Justify why Gunther is in a match where the other two can pin or submit the other and Gunther still loses his title. Justify it! JUSTIFY IT!!

Pearce has Gunther calm down now, and Gunther signs his part. Is Pearce happy now? Whatever he has to do to defend HIS title at WrestleMania will be justified. Gunther will beat McIntyre. He will beat Sheamus. And if he has to, he’ll beat up Ridge and- What is Dunne looking at him like that for? DUNNE JUMPS THE TABLE TO GET AT GUNTHER!! Fans go wild as Butch goes wild! Ridge drags Dunne away, Gunther TOSSES the table! Gunther gets in Pearce’s face and Gunther wants a match! Pearce says okay, just calm down! Is Der Ring General about to break the Bruiserweight?

“Butch” Pete Dunne w/ The Brawling Brutes VS GUNTER!

SmackDown returns, and Gunther has Dunne on the ropes. Dunne pulls on Gunther’s ears! Then CHOPS and CHOPS and CHOPS! Dunne runs, but into a BOOT! Gunther drags Dunne up, scoops and SLAMS him, then sits him up to PENALTY KICK! Dunne kicks back from below! Dunne forearms, CHOPS, SLAPS and then jumps on for a a DOUBLE WRISTLOCK! Gunther throws body shots and then shifts Dunne around into a BUTTERFLY SUPLEX! Fans fire up while Gunther paces around Dunne. Gunther kicks Dunne in the side, he taunts Sheamus, then he stomps Dunne down.

Gunther brings Dunne up but Dunne throws body shots! Dunne forearms, but Gunther CHOPS Dunne off his feet! Even McIntyre is feeling that one. Gunther drags Dunne up, and CHOPS him right back down! But Gunther holds onto the wrist and he brings Dunne up again. Gunther CHOPS Dunne inside-out! Gunther still holds the wrist and he gives toying kicks to Dunne while taunting Sheamus. Gunther ripcords, but Dunne uses that for a TRIANGLE HOLD! Gunther CHOPS Dunne down, into a BOSTON CRAB! Dunne endures, Sheamus and Ridge coach Dunne, and Dunne fights, only for Gunther to shift to an STF!

Dunne still endures, even as Gunther bends him back. Dunne pries free, wrenches the arm and bends the fingers! Gunther pulls hair, then CHOPS Dunne down! Gunther drags Dunne back up but Dunne ENZIGURIS! And ENZIGURIS again! Gunther wobbles, blocks the third enziguri and deadlift GERMAN SUPLEXES! Dunne goes to a corner, Gunther hauls him up onto the top rope to CHOP! Gunther climbs up and he STANDS on Dunne! Dunne endures and the ref counts, Gunther lets off and Dunne tumbles to the floor! Sheamus checks on Dunne, Gunther stands tall, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Gunther has Dunne on the ropes. Gunther taunts Sheamus, but Dunne catches his Beats of the Bodhrain! Fans fire up as Dunne bends the fingers, and SNAPS them!! Gunther staggers away, Dunne runs in to fire forearms! GAMANGIRI! Gunther staggers, Dunne goes up and fans chant for the “BRUISERWEIGHT! BRUISERWEIGHT!” as Dunne DOUBLE STOMPS the arm! Dunne waistlocks, but Gunther switches and puts on a SLEEPER! Dunne drops down, but powers up and he pries at the hold! Gunther holds on tight, Dunne reaches for ropes, and fans rally up, ROPEBREAK!

Gunther SLAPS the arms down, GERMAN SUPLEXEs, but Dunne lands on his feet! BUZZSAW! Gunther bails out and McIntyre smirks. Dunne goes to the apron but Gunther avoids the moonsault! Gunther CHOPS Dunne, and Dunne tumbles onto the desk! Gunther turns around to see Sheamus and McIntyre, but Dunne runs in! Gunther sends him into McIntyre! Gunther BOOTS Dunne into the ring! But Dunne STOMPS the hands and BUZZSAWS Gunther! Fans fire up, but McIntyre is on the apron! Sheamus drags McIntyre down! GLASGOW KISS from McIntyre! Ridge goes after McIntyre but McIntyre POSTS him!

Sheamus KNEES McIntyre down! Dunne runs in at Gunther, into a LARIAT!! Gunther drags Dunne up, scoops for the LAST SYMPHONY!! Cover, Gunther wins!!

Winner: Gunther, by pinfall

Der Ring General used his enemies against each other, but The Fella stands back up. They both look at the WrestleMania sign, but Sheamus gets out of the way! CLAYMORE hits Gunther!! Fans fire up as Sheamus and McIntyre stare down now, will either of these men come away the NEW Intercontinental Champion in Hollywood? Or will Gunther use them against each other then like he did tonight?

 

The Street Profits are fired up backstage.

Montez Ford says that Intercontinental Championship Triple Threat is bound to be a banger. But he says there’s one thing bigger than that. Angelo Dawkins asks what, and Ford says THEIR tag team showcase. Alpha Academy, Viking Raiders, Braun Strowman & Ricochet, but wait. What do they have in common? Ford motions to the top of the head. Oh, right. They’re “smooth operators~.” But then Braun & Ricochet walk in. Real funny, guys. Y’all got jokes, huh? They got a problem with bald men? They don’t have a lot of room to talk, Dawkins is thinning up top. Whoa, fam, c’mon. Just jokes! Just playing. Well no one’s laughing.

Dawkins is just saying, Braun & Ricochet aren’t much of a tag team. Oh, well, we’ll see who’s playing when Ricochet & Braun show up and the other three teams fool around and find out. They want ALL that smoke. Well, okay, okay. Everyone is fired up for WrestleMania, but who wins the tag team showcase at the Showcase of the Immortals?

 

It’s the SmackDown return of the Kevin Owens Show!

And as such, Kevin Owens himself is headed to the ring. His guest will be Sami Zayn, but what will the Prizefighter and Great Liberator have to say about their coming Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship match? We’ll see, after the break.

SmackDown returns one more time and Kevin has his set and his mic. He thanks the ring announcer for the introduction, and then welcomes us back to the KO Show. Now please welcome his guest, tag team partner, friend and brother, the one and only Sami Zayn! Sami makes his entrance and the fans fire up again. Sami gets a mic and Kevin says, “Yeah, so I did it right? The way you wanted. It worked out?” Sami asks what Kevin means. Well, he brought Sami out with the big introduction like he wanted. It was good, right? Sami says he didn’t want a big introduction, this is Kevin’s show, and Sami’s the guest.

Yeah, but earlier, Kevin suggested they come out as co-hosts but Sami said they should make separate entrances so the fans can hear both of their songs and cheer for both of them. Which really means Sami wanted his own pop. Sami says he did not, but Kevin says it’s fine, the fans love him! Kevin gets it. Fans do cheer for “SAMI! SAMI!” Kevin sits, Sami asks if they need to spill more backstage secrets, or can they just get to business? Yeah, of course. Sami says more than anyone, he’s been going non-stop about taking down Roman, the Usos, the Bloodline. And even Sami has lost sight of the fact that, does Kevin realize what they’re on the verge of doing?

“After all these years, from where we started, from nothing, staring together in Montreal all those years ago, we are on the verge of winning the WWE Undisputed Tag Team Championships! We are on the verge of doing that together, at WrestleMania! And not just any WrestleMania. This year, I don’t know what it is, but WrestleMania feels different this year.” Kevin says that’s right. And it isn’t lost on him. He knows what they can accomplish. But Sami is right, WrestleMania does feel different this year. Which is why Kevin brought Sami out here. Kevin has something for Sami.

Now, remember a few months ago, after Roman gave Sami that Honorary Uce shirt, that Kevin said Sami needed a new one. Kevin has one, it’s a KO-Mania Goes Hollywood shirt. That’s great! Well yes, but this is the back of it. Kevin does KO-Mania every year. But this year is different. This year isn’t about KO-Mania. “This year, there is only one person who took WWE by storm, who caught fire like no one else. There’s only one person that people can look at and say, ‘That guy has been the MVP of the WWE for the last 12 months,’ and that person is you,” Sami. Fans chant “MVP! MVP!” and Sami is rather touched.

Kevin says this year, it isn’t KO-Mania. It’s about the other side of the shirt. Kevin hands it over, Sami turns it around, and he sees… WrestleZAYNIA!! Sami’s all fired up now! Kevin shows that he’s been wearing one the whole time! Sami loves it! He throws off his shirt to put on the new shirt! Sami wants a hug but Kevin says no, one hug a year. Aw what the heck? THEY HUG! But then THE USOS attack!! They blindside KO & Sami from the crowd side, and then Jimmy rains down fists on Kevin while Jey rains down fists on Sami! Fans boo while the Usos clear the ring of the chairs. DOUBLE SUPERKICKS for Kevin!

Jey drags Sami up, whips him to ropes, and the Usos hit ONE AND DONE!! The fans boo more but Kevin gets up with a steel chair! The Usos run for it, telling KO & Sami that they’re going down! Kevin beats an armchair with the steel chair, but Sami tells the Usos that they’re not getting away with this one. Will Jimmy & Jey ruin the first ever WrestleZaynia? Or will KO & Sami be the ones to finally stop the ones?


My Thoughts:

A great episode for SmackDown here, especially with the story developments. For one, great closing moment we just saw with a great KO Show. I love that we got a positive swerve where Kevin gave Sami a shirt that had a WrestleZaynia logo on it. But I should’ve figured the Bloodline would do something, and the Usos technically stand tall here. That math would suggest the Usos are losing at WrestleMania, and we finally get so much in that moment, from vindication for Sami to the WWE Grand Slam for Kevin. We also got a really good match out of Cody VS Ludwig that Cody of course wins, and a really good promo segment right after for Cody and Heyman. The Bloodline is definitely desperate to hold onto everything, but that could be what brings them down.

Fairly big news with Theory VS Cena opening WrestleMania Night One. I’ve said before that it just feels like Theory is gonna win, since Cena doesn’t need the US title, and isn’t gonna be sticking around long enough to do anything with the US title. So if Theory wins the first match of the weekend, I could see him boasting, bragging and partying the entire weekend until he is just insufferable and annoys someone into challenging him for that title on the Raw After Mania. And then a pretty good promo from Charlotte, and I did like her calling out the “WHAT” chants here. Stone Cold Steve Austin is timeless, but lemming fans throwing out “WHAT” just to throw out ‘WHAT” are what? Stupid, that’s what. A) Show respect and pay attention. B) Come up with something of your own.

Really good match from Rey VS Knight, but of course Dom distracts to cost Rey. But biggest of all from that segment, the moment fans have wanted for the last few weeks now: REY DECKS DOM! And now we’ll get Rey VS Dom, and Dom sold all the emotion after that perfectly. He was upset, but there was also the fear and realization that comes with seeing something he thought would never happen actually happening. His dad is gonna whoop him, because Dom will only have Priest by his side while Finn prepares for Edge and Rhea prepares for Charlotte. And Legado can make a heroic move by countering Priest so that Rey VS Dom has a fair finish.

Good promo from Profits, Braun & Ricochet to put some tension between those teams going into the men’s Fatal 4. Good tag match qualifier for the women’s Fatal 4, and it was good weaving of stories that Shotzi & Natty win. Shayna & Ronda get that “first round bye” right into the match, but it does work because all four Faces want payback on them. It might not even matter who the fourth team is (though I’m sure it’ll be a team from Raw), Ronda & Shayna are probably gonna tear into them all to win and essentially be #1 contenders to the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships.

And there was just so much great stuff in the Intercontinental Championship contract signing. Sheamus brought back the same stuff he said when he and McIntyre had their 1v1 feud last year but that makes sense, it is how people can be when they argue with friends and family. I feel like McIntyre was tempted to Steiner Math because this is a Triple Threat, and he knows he can beat Sheamus. Gunther was also great, and I love that “Butch” Dunne went right after Gunther over their NXT UK past. Gunther VS Dunne was great stuff to have just for the hell of it, but of course there was the usual misunderstanding shenanigans that helped Gunther win.

If Gunther somehow retains at Mania, can we have HHH get Trent Seven back in WWE so we can have British Strong Style VS Imperium for the Summer? There were fans in Vegas who remembered Dunne for being Dunne and not for being a sidekick, and all fans deserve to see that Dunne alongside Tyler Bate and Trent Seven.

My Score: 8.8/10


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