NFL

Cook: Super Bowl LVI Final Thoughts

The Super Bowl worked for Cook’s betting picks, but not his fandom. He unfurls some feelings and thoughts about the Super Bowl, and the season that was.

Published

1 year ago

February 14, 2022

Steve Cook

As a fan of the team that lost Super Bowl LVI, I should probably feel disappointed. Distressed. Discouraged. Disgruntled. Disenchanted. Despondent. Disconcerted. Dissatisfied. Depressed. Dejected. Despondent. Down. Downcast. Downhearted. Lots of D words, basically.

Don’t get me wrong. A sports fan’s favorite team losing any type of game comes with a bit of a sting. You want your team to win. Even those mid-September baseball games where your team has already been mathematically eliminated come with a little sting upon defeat. So yeah, I won’t deny that the Bengals coming up a little short at the end of the game stung a bit. It wasn’t the optimal result.

With that being said…I’m not disappointed or distressed or discouraged or disgruntled or disenchanted or any of those other D words I mentioned earlier. There were plenty of Bengals seasons that left me in that state of mind. Most of the pre-Marvin Lewis seasons. A lot of those Marvin Lewis seasons did, even the ones where they made the playoffs.

The 2021 version of the Cincinnati Bengals gave me nothing to be ashamed of. There were certainly some ups & downs in the regular season, but we all know that the postseason is what matters in football & every other sport. The postseason was the downfall of the Marvin Lewis Era of the Bengals. They could make it there. They just couldn’t win a game. Against anybody. I’m pretty sure I could have found 22 people on the street and beat the Marvin Lewis Bengals in a postseason game.

These Bengals made us forget about the past. Three decades of not winning in the playoffs came to an end. They were favored against the Raiders, but not really favored because they were the Bengals. It was a big hump for fans to get over. I was more gobsmacked after that win than what followed.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK YYYEEEEEAAAHHHHH ORSDKDGLDRKKHOJSOGSGDHMKXHKHDLSDH

— Steve Cook (@stevecook84) January 16, 2022

I could barely even text people afterward. It was unreal. Once that happened, things got more real. There was this Tennessee Titans team that was the #1 seed but was doubted because of their quarterback and injuries that happened but still got the #1 seed. (Those fans are still very bitter towards Bengal folks, btw.) The Titans even sacked Joe Burrow 9 times and still managed to lose because their offense couldn’t take advantage. But their coach won an award so everything’s ok.

The Chiefs, now there’s a beast I still can’t believe the Bengals managed to beat twice somehow. They’re cutthroat sumbitches just like Dustin James, and have the best quarterback of modern times in Patrick Mahomes. We know they’ll be one of the top teams in the AFC for years to come. Beating them in Week 17 in Cincinnati was one thing. Beating them in the AFC Championship Game in Arrowhead Stadium? Another thing entirely. Crazy stuff, unimaginable before it happened.

The Super Bowl didn’t end well, obviously. There were still moments that Bengals fans wouldn’t have believed before they happened. Joe Mixon throwing a touchdown pass, for one. The experts expected the Rams to blow the Bengals out of the water, and that isn’t quite what happened.

So what did happen?

The Rams’ stars rose to the top, as cream always does eventually. The Bengals could keep Cooper Kupp & Aaron Donald down for so long. You can’t keep the cream down forever. The Bengals’ offensive line could hold the Rams back for 2.5 quarters. They hit a wall eventually. The Rams ran out of weapons other than Cooper Kupp. Odell Beckham had a good game early, got hurt. Kupp was their last option after that, and the Bengals could shut him down for a minute, but not forever. When it was the end of the game and time for stars to step up to the plate, Cooper Kupp got the ball. You have to tip your hat to him.

The Bengals didn’t capitalize off of certain opportunities. As much as we love Evan McPherson, an extra touchdown instead of a field goal would have helped. That early 4th down call that led to a Rams touchdown didn’t help. Why was Samaje Perine in & having the ball directed towards him during the last two Bengals offensive plays of the game instead of Joe Mixon?

Maybe we’ll understand someday. Maybe we won’t. At the end of the day, the result is the same. The loss hurts, but seasons have come to an end in much bitter fashion. The future is still bright. The Cincinnati Bengals may not have shed all of their stereotypes, but few can deny that this isn’t a different team than previous versions. Joe Burrow is still with us, and doesn’t seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. Ja’Marr Chase is pretty good, along with Tee Higgins. The main thing the Bengals need? Offensive line, which this upcoming draft seems to have a deep pool of.

No, I’m not any of those D words. I’m optimistic about the future of the Cincinnati Bengals. The main thing that worries me? Given how fleeting existence on this mortal coil seems to be these days, I just hope to be around to see that moment where the Bengals finally shut the mouths of those critics. If only for a moment. Critics will always critic, as I well know being one myself.

Who Dey.

Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!

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The Wortz brothers are back one last time this season to review Super Bowl LVII!

Published

2 months ago

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The Wortz brothers are back one last time this season to review Super Bowl LVII!

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NFL

Cook’s 2022 NFL Gambling Picks: Super Bowl LVII

It’s the Super Bowl, and the world will be watching! See who your resident Chairshot handicapper Steve Cook thinks will win the NFL’s championship!

Published

2 months ago

February 11, 2023

Steve Cook

It’s the Super Bowl, and the world will be watching! See who your resident Chairshot handicapper Steve Cook thinks will win the NFL’s championship game between the Eagles and the Chiefs.

Hi, hello & welcome to Super Bowl LVII! I’m Steve Cook, and I’m not going to lie to you good & honest Chairshot readers. I have absolutely no interest in writing this column or watching this game. None whatsoever. Those of you that root for NFL teams that have come up short in conference championship games know exactly what I’m talking about. Granted, getting to that position certainly beats a decade of three-win seasons, three decades of not being able to win a single playoff game & most of the states that NFL franchises currently find themselves in, but there is absolutely no fun to be had in a Super Bowl that you think your team should be in.

Our Cincinnati Bengals had a few too many obstacles in front of them. They had to deal with the best quarterback in the league, who allegedly had a high ankle sprain but seemed to be throwing the ball and moving around pretty well. The Bengals quarterback didn’t have his best game, and their offensive line had a little too much to deal with while the Chiefs’ offensive line seemed unbothered. There was all the trash being talked by some of the Bengal players, which while horribly overplayed by the media certainly got under the Chiefs’ skin. Then there were the officials giving the Chiefs extra downs whenever they needed them and popping up with some kind of bogus call whenever the Bengals made a big play.

So the Bengals season is over. Which is fine. Now I have to hear about how it’s such a wonderful story that the Kansas City Chiefs managed to somehow get back to the Super Bowl. I have to hear about Andy Reid, & Patrick Mahomes, & Jackson Mahomes, & how loud it gets in Kansas City, and that goofball from the University of Convicts, Travis Kelce. Oh don’t get me started…ok, I’ll get started.

Did you know that Travis & Jason Kelce are the first brothers to oppose each other in the Super Bowl? I might have heard that a time or thousand over the past couple of weeks. It’s not accurate. See, Travis is a tight end for the Chiefs, while Jason plays center for the Eagles. They will not be taking the field against each other. Had the Cardinals & Steelers played in this game, and J.J. Watt played linebacker for the Cardinals while Derek Watt was in at fullback for the Steelers, they would have opposed each other in the Super Bowl. That would have been interesting. This isn’t. Let me know if Travis goes in at linebacker, or Jason lines up at defensive end, because that would be interesting. Here, they’ll just stare across the field at each other like a couple of octogenarian politicians.

Chiefs vs. Eagles. I mean, the whole “two Black quarterbacks” thing is pretty cool, and it’s shocking yet not all that shocking that it took so long. Beyond that, I’ve got nothing. I’m still going to be stuck watching this thing, so how does one get excited for the actual game itself?

Prop bets?

Yep, we got prop bets coming out the yin yang for the biggest sports gambling day of the year. You can bet on almost anything going on in this game, though I wouldn’t recommend it unless you have some inside knowledge. How long will the National Anthem take? Bet on it if you know how fast Chris Stapleton sings things. I don’t listen to current hip-hop, so I’m not familiar with his work. Let’s take a look at some of the best and/or most popular…

What will the coin toss land on?

Heads: -105
Tails: -105

One of the dumbest things to bet on out there, but still one of the most popular. Heads has won four out of the last five Super Bowls. Personally, I always chose Heads on Madden 2002 back in the day, so that would be my pick.

Super Bowl MVP:

Patrick Mahomes: +130
Jalen Hurts: +140
Travis Kelce: +1100
AJ Brown: +1400
Miles Sanders: +2500
Devonta Smith: +3000
Haason Reddick: +3000

There’s a long list of other options on BetMGM, but I feel like I’ve already listed too many. A quarterback has won this award thirty-one times. Mahomes is going for his second, and with his “story” going in it’d be an easy call to make if the Chiefs end up winning. Now, we’ve seen a wide receiver win it two out of the last four seasons, this opens the door for the likes of an AJ Brown to slip through. Interesting thing about Kelce: No tight end has ever won Super Bowl MVP. Considering how much media has gassed him up this week with the “brothers” storyline, he’s an interesting choice at +1100. I still think the quarterbacks are the obvious bets, especially if you’re getting them at plus odds. I could see this changing before Sunday.

Color of Gatorade Bath:

Orange: +325
Yellow/Green: +175
Clear/Water: +750
Blue: +400
Red/Pink: +500
Purple: +900
No Gatorade Poured: +1400

I’m a Lemon-Lime guy myself, so I would be hoping for some yellow Gatorade on the sideline if I was involved. I am not, so it would behoove those wanting to bet on this to figure out which Gatorade players of both teams prefer. Blue has had a strong run, winning three out of the last four years. It seems relevant to point out that the Chiefs doused Andy Reid with Orange back in 2020. Some have speculated that Reid may opt out of the Gatorade bath now since he’s old…I don’t think he’s quite that grouchy yet, but it’s something to keep in mind.

I’d go Blue or Orange depending on who you think will win.

Sunday, February 12

Kansas City vs. Philadelphia (-1.5)

This is WILD 🤯

📺: #SBLVII on FOX pic.twitter.com/qZGxeUZNsu

— FOX Sports: NFL (@NFLonFOX) February 9, 2023

We’ve already said a lot about the Kansas City Chiefs. While I have my reservations over how they conduct themselves as an organization and over how they got to this particular game, I’m still a bit surprised to see them as an underdog. They’ve been here before, multiple times in recent years. Their recent postseason success would look even more impressive if it’d taken place before Tom Brady and/or the Patriots shifted the paradigm. Five straight AFC Championship Game appearances, three out of four Super Bowl appearances. They’ve dominated the AFC in recent years, and with Pat Mahomes locked up they’ll probably dominate the AFC in future years.

So why are they the underdogs?

The Philadelphia School District announced a delayed opening for Monday after the Super Bowl 🎒 pic.twitter.com/EJu3z6MgST

— FOX Sports: NFL (@NFLonFOX) February 9, 2023

While the Chiefs had difficulty dispatching the Jaguars & Bengals in their AFC playoff games, the Eagles ran through their NFC opponents like a hot knife through butter. They had no issue defeating the Giants, then stomped out the hopes & dreams of the quarterback-less 49ers. There’s a knock against the Eagles, which is the idea that they’ve had a relatively easy schedule. It kind of falls apart when you remember they played the Cowboys & Giants twice in the regular season, along with two other playoff teams in the Vikings & Jaguars early in the season. The Packers & Titans are usually playoff teams and both teams nearly made it again. These Eagles have taken care of business so far, and they could very well do it again.

I don’t think they do. Patrick Mahomes may not have had that blow-away Super Bowl performance yet, but it’s coming. If you’re giving me the Chiefs as an underdog, I’m gonna take it.

Thanks for reading, and enjoy Super Bowl LVII!