Mitchell’s WWE WrestleMania 38 Results & Report! (4/3/22)
There can only be ONE!
It’s night two of the most STUPENDOUS WrestleMania ever!
And in the biggest main event ever, the reigning, defending World and Universal Champions battle to determine a NEW UNDISPUTED WWE CHAMPION!
- Raw Tag Team Championships Triple Threat: RKBRO VS The Alpha Academy VS The Street Profits; RKBRO wins and retains the titles.
- Omos VS Bobby Lashley; Lashley wins.
- Anything Goes: Sami Zayn VS Johnny Knoxville; Knoxville wins.
- WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship Fatal 4 Way: Carmella & Queen Zelina Vega VS Sasha Banks & Naomi VS Liv Morgan & Rhea Ripley VS Shayna Baszler & Natalya; Sasha & Naomi win and become the new WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions.
- Edge VS AJ Styles; Edge wins.
- The New Day VS Sheamus & Ridge Holland w/ “Butch” Pete Dunne; Sheamus & Ridge win.
- Austin Theory VS Pat McAfee; McAfee wins.
- Pat McAfee VS Vince McMahon w/ Austin Theory; McMahon wins.
- WWE World & Universal Championships, Winner Takes All Title Unification: Brock Lesnar VS Roman Reigns w/ The Bloodline; Roman wins and becomes the Undisputed WWE Universal Champion.
PLAY BY PLAY
It’s the WrestleMania 38 Kickoff Show!
The most STUPENDOUS weekend is almost over, but join Kayla Braxton, Kevin Patrick, Booker T, Jerry “The King” Lawler and Peter Rosenberg for another two hours to discuss last night, as well as discuss, analyze and predict this night’s card!
What is God Mode?
Roman Reigns himself says, “God Mode is 200 IQ plus world class athlete. It’s not a switch, it’s years and years of work. It’s a journey. And anyone who has reached the top of what they do understands what it takes. That’s allowed me to that point of experience where I’m just smarter than everybody else.” Roman is in Western Florida and the gym. The gym doesn’t acknowledge him. If he can’t do it, he can’t do it. He pushes himself every single time. What someone does in the weight room, it has to translate to the field, tot he ring. Explosion, power, conditioning. Roman gets stronger as the match goes on.
He still believes in the old school, nitty gritty, pick up the weight and own it. All the classic lifts. These are what the real pros have tapped into and it is nothing different for him. He knows how to handle Brock Lesnar. He learned from every false step, reanalyzed every little detail that we thought of, and the ones we didn’t because we’re not as smart of him. There is one sliver of credit that goes to that “Hillbilly farm boy.” He’ll be in the record books as the supporting player to the number one guy, Roman Reigns. Roman has manifested the outcome he sees fit for the Tribal Chief, the Head of the Table, the Bloodline. God Mode gonna come easy.
This is Roman’s sixth main event and he will finally beat Brock to become the greatest WWE Champion of all time. No arguments, no debates, this is factual. The biggest main event of all time, and Roman’s ready. Will Dallas be ready for it?
Matt Camp hangs out with more fans.
Tonight could be a Jackass playground! Team Johnny or Team Sami? One young lady says she grew up with Johnny, she can’t wait to see the stunts he pulls! But one of the guys says he’s done with celebrities thinking they can perform. Sami will Helluva Kick Johnny back to Hollywood! What happens when it is truly Anything Goes?
Jackie Redmond is with fans inside the arena.
Another wild and rowdy crowd is ready for this one, and they have traveled far and wide from all over the world! How far did these guys come from? Bangladesh! And all worth it, baby! They are here to see Roman Reigns, what do they predict? He’ll SMASH Lesnar all over AT&T Stadium! Well, the Head of the Table likes to be acknowledge, will they acknowledge him? “Tribal Chief! We acknowledge you! The one!”
Backstage interview with Paul Heyman.
Megan says the moment is finally here: the biggest WrestleMania Match ever. Title unification! Is Heyman nervous? “That’s the best question that she has for me?” Well, yes, he is nervous. But he’s more than a little nervous. HE’s… ill at ease. He doesn’t feel well. Tonight, Heyman has to mourn the end of a friendship, and a career that has spanned over 20 years. One of an NCAA Heavyweight Champion, a UFC Heavyweight Champion, and a WWE Heavyweight and Universal Heavyweight Champion. The loss of a friendship and career of Brock Lesnar. Heyman’s been here before. Deja vu even.
He’s speaking of WrestleMania 30, when Heyman knew he would conquer The Undertaker’s undefeated streak and half that credit went to Lesnar. But he knew it would happen. And knew that was the beginning of the end of The Deadman. The downward spiral that would bring the end of an exquisite career. And the way Heyman felt for Taker at the hands of Lesnar is how he feels now for Lesnar at the hands of Roman Reigns! This is a must-win match for both but there must be a loser! One man will stand above the other, both titles in the air, and that man and Heyman look down at the end of the career of Brock…! Lesnar!
Maria Menounos interviews Zelina Vega & Carmella.
She asks the Queen of the Ring and the Most Beautiful Woman in WWE how they’re going to retain. Oh, how cute. They’ll explain a Fatal 4 Way to her: Vega can get a pinfall or submission, or Mella can get a pinfall or submission, and they retain. But then what about the other six women in the match? Oh, Liv? A weirdo. Rhea? A spikey weirdo. Sasha? Overrated. Naomi? Did she beg to be in this match? Natalya? Nasty Natty. Shayna? Scary… ‘Tis not fear, ’tis adrenaline! But no one takes down the rightful champions without sacrificing their pathetic little lives! Now, Vega & Mella are going to make sure the champagne is chilling. Will they be popping bottles? Or be getting popped by one of their many contenders?
Matt Camp is hanging out with more fans!
With less than an hour, they’re all fired up! And Sam is here in Texas, to ACKNOWLEDGE his Head of the Table, Matt’s Head of the Table, during the biggest match of all time, ROMAN REIGNS! One young fan wants to see McAfee beat Austin Theory! And another wants Edge to beat AJ Styles!
Jackie Redmond spends time with even more fans.
We’re just hours away from that very same match, with fans divided in Team Brock and Team Roman. Why is Roman better? He dominates everybody! He’ll win easily! Lesnar has no chance! But what about Team Brock? They vote for the REIGNING! DEFENDING! UNIFIED CHAMPION OF THE WORLD~! BRRROCK! LESNARRR!
Maria Menounos is outside Mr. McMahon’s office.
But Austin Theory walks out and asks if she has a question for him. Oh she does. He has a match with Pat McAfee, but doe she have a strategy? He has no worries. He just talked with Vince, and as his protégé, Vince has all the confidence in Theory showing no mercy to that retired NFL punter, “Fat McAfee.” Look at McAfee and look at Theory! There’s no comparison! McAfee apologized once, so he’ll apologize again for even stepping into that ring. Then Theory will win and take the most STUPENDOUS selfie. And all McAfee will remember is A-Town putting him down! Selfie with Maria!
Maria Menounos interviews Bobby Lashley.
Maria says Lashley made history by being the first superstar to knock Omos off his feet. Can he do it again and end the undefeated streak? Lashley knows Omos is a monster. He debuted last year at WrestleMania, dominated ever since. He’s beaten everyone, and decimated whole tag teams without breaking a sweat. But that’s why Lashley is charged up. He is going to put the myth of Omos to rest! Omos is unbeaten, but that doesn’t mean he’s unbeatable. Will this be a truly MIGHTY match?
Performing America the Beautiful, singer, fashion designer and writer, Jessie James Decker!
The most STUPENDOUS WrestleMania Weekend is almost over!
Mark Wahlberg says, “It’s rare that the sequel is as good as the original. Is this one of those rare moments? There’s only one way to find out. Let’s run it back.” The passion, the pageantry, the power and all things STUPENDOUS. Yeah, you gotta run that back. Sequel pro-tip: keep them guessing. The good guys, the not so good, and a lot of action, as well as the biggest WrestleMania main event of all time! Title unification, winner take all, and there can only be one. No more previews. This sequel isn’t just edge-of-your-seat, but OUT of your seat action. Mark’s not crying, you’re crying. Welcome back to the most STUPENDOUS two-night Mania in history!
TRIPLE H IIS HERE!!
The Game may have retired from in-ring competition, but he’d never miss out on the most STUPENDOUS WrestleMania in history! He goes right to the ring as fans go nuts! He hugs his three daughters, says hey to Gable Steveson, then gives us one last blast of water! HHH goes up to the corner, does his iconic flex pose, and then soaks in the moment as fans chant his name. HHH gets a mic and his wrestling boots. Fans chant, “Thank You, Hunter!” as he sets the boots down in the middle of the ring and throws up a Too Sweet. HHH then says, “I just wanted to come out here to say thank you.”
And to show us HHH’s love the best way he knows how, “WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA!” Pyro goes off with that and the fans cheer. HHH leaves mic down by the boots, and takes one last exit from the ring to the back. #ThankYouHHH.
Raw Tag Team Championships Triple Threat: RKBRO VS The Alpha Academy VS The Street Profits!
The Viper and the Stallion have the gold back again, but once again they’re in a Triple Threat situation! Swap out Kevin Owens & Seth Rollins and plug in Angelo Dawkins & Montez Ford, will the Profits change the math and the results? Will “Master” Chad Gable & Otis get the belts back #ForTheAcademy? Or will the unlikeliest WWE duo in a long time still be on top of the Raw Tag Division?
The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see if anyone survives the three most dangerous letters in sports entertainment.
In this Triple Threat, there is one man from each team. Riddle, Ford and Gable start, and Gable tries to “SHOOSH~!” everyone. So Ford SLAPS Gable, Riddle ROUNDHOUSES him! Ford rolls Riddle, ONE! Riddle fireman’s carries, but Ford slips off and shoves to then follow and LARIAT! Gable gets up to GERMAN SUPLEX Ford! Bridging cover, BROTON breaks it! Dawkins throws Riddle out but Orton throws Dawkins out! Gable throws Orton out but Ford throws Gable out! Otis TOSSES Ford out hard! The tree trunk with arms roars but fans boo! The teams all regroup, but now it’s a chaotic brawl!
Otis throws Riddle out, Dawkins stomps Orton, Ford ENZIGURIS Gable! Gable is in a corner, Ford himself is dizzy from his landing, but he gets up to run and FLIES over the corner! Ford takes out everyone but Gable! Gable decides to go up, and he ARIHARA MOONSAULTS onto everyone! All six men are down and fans are fired up! Gable gets up, he finds Riddle and puts him in the ring. Gable drags Riddle up, throws body shots, but Riddle fires back! Otis tags in, Gable whips Riddle, DISCUS GERMAN COMBO! “A thank yew~!” Fans boo again but Otis stomps Riddle down. Otis drags Riddle up and hits a short arm LARIAT!
Otis says, “For the Academy!” Otis then drags Riddle up, another short arm LARIAT! Otis runs, for a SPLASH! Otis toys with Riddle, fans rally up, and Otis scoops to SLAM Riddle! Fans fire up for RKBRO but Otis sits Riddle up for a neck wrench. Riddle endures, fights up, reaches out, but Otis knees him low. Otis brings Riddle around, ROCKS him with a right, then brings him to the corner. Tag to Gable, Gable NORTHERN LIGHTS! Bridging cover, TWO! Gable gets Riddle by a leg, hooks it for a standing toehold, and says, “A THANK YEW~!” Riddle endures, reaches out, but it’s also a cover, TWO!
Riddle uses his free leg to kick at Gable! Riddle gets free, gets to his feet, but Gable blocks a kick for a DRAGON SCREW! But Ford returns to dropkick Gable! Ford runs in but into a throat chop! Gable runs in, MONKEY FLIP! Ford flounders hard, Gable covers him, TWO! Gable looms over Ford now, brings him up for a waistlock, but Ford slips out of the back suplex to tag Dawkins! Dawkins runs, hurdles and FLYING ELBOWS! Then an EXPLODER for Riddle! EXPLODER for Gable! Otis tags in while Dawkins gives Riddle the SILENCER! Cover, SPLASH from Otis! Both men just got crushed!
Otis puts Riddle in a corner, RAMS into him, then brings Riddle to the corner. Riddle fights off the Academy, goes up and over, Otis POSTS himself! Gable tags in, gets Riddle’s leg, ANKLE LOCK! Riddle fights up, and KNEES free! Dawkins hurries to stop Riddle as fans rally, but Riddle fireman’s carries, BRO TO SLEEP! All three men are down and fans are fired up! Riddle crawls over, so does Dawkins, hot tags to Ford and Orton! The Viper rallies, fans are fired up, POWERSLAM! Orton gets fired up now as he has Ford on the apron! Ford slips out of the ropes to trip Orton and bring him out!
Orton blocks the desk smack to SMACK Ford! Then DESK BACK SUPLEX! Gable runs in, he gets a DESK BACK SUPLEX! Orton is having fun now! He has Ford in the ropes, Riddle intercepts Dawkins with a KNEE! Dawkins ends up in the ropes and now Riddle has him! RKBRO with the DOUBLE DRAPING DDT’s for the Profits! Fans are thunderous as RKBRO hears those voices in their heads! But the Academy drags them out to RAM them into barriers! DISCUS ELBOW for Dawkins! Gable climbs, Otis Electric Chair Lifts Ford, FLYING BULLDOG! Shoutout to the Steiner Brothers! Cover, TWO!!
Gable is furious over the count but somehow Ford survives! But Gable puts Ford in a drop zone and Otis wants to shout out Vader now! Only for Riddle and Dawkins to shove him over together! Dawkins then TOSSES Riddle, he tags in as Gable MONKEY FLIPS! Ford lands on his feet, Dawkins gets Gable up top! Ford says “SUCK IT!” before a BLOCKBUSTER DOOMSDAY! Cover, TWO!? Gable survives now and now one can believe it! “This is Awesome!” as Dawkins, Gable and Riddle slowly rise. Gable gets out of the ring, Riddle runs in but is put on the apron. Riddle ROCKS Dawkins, PENLTY KICKS Otis, but Dawkins DECKS Riddle!
Otis tosses Riddle down, Dawkins turns around but denies an RKO! ANOINTING! Tag to Ford, Dawkins FLIES onto Otis!! Ford is all fired up, but Riddle gets him for a SUPER RKO!!! Fans are going nuts as RKBRO is left in the ring! Gable drags himself up to the apron and then the top of a corner! Gable leaps, into an RKO!!! Cover, RKBRO WINS!
Winners: RKBRO, by pinfall (still Raw Tag Team Champions)
BROOOO! That was perhaps the most STUPENDOUS tag title Triple Threat ever! And in the end, the Viper & the Stallion continue their wild ride! The Profits get back in the ring, with Solo cups, and they fist bump it out for respect. But even more so, Ford and Dawkins give them a little bit of that somethin’ somethin’! They even invite Steveson! Steveson shrugs, hops the barriers and gets in the ring for his first WrestleMania moment ever! And all together, they toast! Only for Gable to SLAP the drink out of Steveson’s hand! Steveson is pissed!! Everyone else backs up but Chad Gable gets a mic.
Steveson snatches it from him! But then Gable snatches it back, and tells the “kid” he’s just starting here. Here’s a free lesson: when you’re in Chad’s presence, remember one thing. SHOOOOOOSH~! Steveson picks up Chad to OVERHEAD Belly2Belly him! Is that just a sample of what this Gable is going to bring to the ring?
Omos VS Bobby Lashley!
For 365 days, this 400 HUNDRED POUND walking mountain has dominated whoever is put in front of him, and is undefeated in singles action. But just as he felt there was on one left, the Rocky Mountain Machine made his return! Lashley was the first man in the WWE and perhaps anywhere to take Omos off his feet, but will he be the one to give Omos his first loss?
The bell rings and the two circle. Omos talks smack but Lashley kicks. Omos blocks then CLUBS Lashley down! Lashley gets up at ropes, Omos CLUBS Lashley back down! Lashley gets up again, ducks the roundhouse then kicks low! Lashley reels Omos in?! But Omos body shots and knees to then uppercut Lashley! Lashley staggers, Omos clamps on a hand onto Lashley’s head! Lashley powers out of the vice grip and Omos is surprised! But Omos knees low to stop that, and tries again. Omos CLOBBERS Lashley point blank! But Lashley gets back up? And he SLAPS Omos!? Omos BOOTS Lashley back down!
Omos is mad now and he puts Lashley in a corner for big elbows and point-blank clotheslines! Omos lets off as the ref counts to run in and elbow Lashley down! Omos then runs in again, but only gets buckles! Lashley still can’t get away from those big arms, but Omos runs again to miss again! Lashley goes after Omos with clotheslines to the back, then runs side to side, one more BIG clothesline! Fans fire up for Lashley and he wants the full nelson! Omos is too big, though! Omos stops the Hurt Lock from clamping on, then runs to LARIAT Lashley down! Omos looms over Lashley as he slowly gets up.
Omos clamps on both hands, and he shoves Lashley out of the ring! Lashley is down in a heap and the ring count climbs. Lashley manages to get up at 5 of 10, but Omos goes out after him. Lashley leaps onto the apron and then LARIATS Omos while he’s on the ropes! Lashley hurries in and up, to leap! But Omos catches Lashley! Omos fireman’s carries, for a COLOSSAL DROP!! Lashley crash lands on the mat, and Omos dares him to get up from that. Lashley does, Omos runs, but into a back elbow! Lashley runs, but into a BEARHUG! Omos squeezes tight but fans rally as Lashley endures!
Lashley digs forearms into Omos’ face, so Omos RAMS Lashley into a corner! Lashley flops to the mat, but Omos stands him up to throw elbows! Omos reels Lashley back into a BEARHUG! Lashley is somehow conscious and fans still rally. Omos goes for another corner, Lashley slips free! Omos hits only buckles, Lashley runs in to fire haymakers! Lashley keeps Omos staggered, then he sends him into more buckles! Lashley kicks low, reels Omos in, and fans fire up as Lashley calls for it! But Omos wrenches out and swings, only for Lashley to get around! Lashley kicks low and wants it again! MASSIVE SUPLEX!
Fans are thunderous with Lashley as he runs and runs and SPEARS Omos from behind! He takes Omos down!! Omos gets back up but Lashley SPEARS again!! Cover, Lashley wins!!
Winner: Bobby Lashley, by pinfall
That was the MIGHTIEST win for Lashley, and the first loss for Omos! Somehow the ring is still standing, too! Will Lashley use this colossal win to climb back up the mountain of WWE?
Anything Goes: Sami Zayn VS Johnny Knoxville!
This all started because the “Elder Statesman” of SmackDown insulted the Jackass leading man, and then things got #InZayn. Sami is definitely a jackass in his own right, but will he have the last laugh? Or will Knoxville pull off the most exciting stunt of his career and win at WrestleMania?
The bell rings and Sami runs to HELLUVA KICK Knoxville right away! Sami is smiling ear to ear then he stomps away on Knoxville. Knoxville falls out of the ring, Sami goes out after him and brings him up to taunt the rest of the Jackass cast. Sami TOSSES Knoxville into barriers but the fans boo. Sami pie faces one and the others start swinging! Sami dares Dark Shark to do something, but he turns around into a FIRE EXTINGUISHER BLAST! Knoxville just cooled Sami off, and then he brings out a trash can full of goodies! Knoxville puts those in the ring, then gets a stop sign! He puts that in but Sami kicks low!
Sami headlock punches Knoxville then puts him in the ring. Sami gets the trash can, dumps it out, and picks up the classic cookie sheet. Sami blows it off so it’s clean, to SMACK Knoxville on the back with it! The sheet is dented, so Sami puts that aside to get the crutch. Sami plays around with the crutch and SMACKS Knoxville on the back! Now the crutch is bent! Sami gets the trash can itself, and he runs corner to corner, to CHUCK it into Knoxville! Sami covers, TWO! Sami is annoyed but he goes back out to look under the ring. Sami finds a wash bin and a bowling ball bag? And then a TABLE!
Fans fire up for the table and Sami slides it into the ring. But then Sami gets snapped by something? He looks under the ring, and it’s a bunch of mouse traps! Sami brings out a table covered in mouse traps! This must be Knoxville’s contraption. Sami likes how crazy Knoxville is, and he gets that thing set up. Sami gets in, to get TRASH CAN LID CYMBALS! And again! And again! Knoxville tosses those to get the stop sign! SMACK to Sami’s back! Sami writhes, Knoxville sets up the normal table in a corner. Knoxville drags Sami up, reels him in, but Sami knees the suplex away! Sami gets around to EXPLODER Knoxville through the table!
Sami drags Knoxville from the wreckage and covers, TWO! Knoxville is still in this and Sami is further annoyed. Sami stalks Knoxville, and Knoxville has a bloody cut on his forehead. Sami says Knoxville is in Sami’s world now! Sami has Knoxville in the corner, runs corner to corner, into an AIRHORN BLAST! Sami staggers, but he comes back to kick Knoxville down! But wait, Party Boy Pontius is in the ring!? Time to party~! Pontius pushes Sami and dances around, then rips off the shirt, and the pants! Classic! Sami is more disturbed than hurt, and he CLOBBERS Pontius! Sami stomps away and fans boo him ruining the party!
Sami drags Pontius up to toss him out! But Knoxville rolls Sami up! TWO!! Sami DECKS Knoxville, glares at Pontius then goes out. Sami stomps “Naked Boy” under the ring! Sami then goes looking, but he gets BOPPED by WEEMAN! Weeman fires off furious fists on Sami! Sami hurries away but Weeman chases him into the ring! Then SHIN KICK! Sami hobbles, Weeman scoops him!? And SLAMS him!! Fans are all fired up as Knoxville reels Sami in, TORNADO DDT! Cover, TWO!?! Sami survives and no one can believe it! Weeman hurries to fetch another contraption from under the ring. It’s a ASS KICKING MACHINE!?
Knoxville drags Sami over, Sami fights back, but Weeman has the machine armed. Sami BOOTS Weeman down before he can fire! Fans boo, but Sami stomps away on Weeman! Weeman flops out of the ring, but Sami drags Knoxville around to rain down fists! Fans tell Sami what they think of him but Sami shrugs it off to go up top. Sami grins, but Knoxville has a remote? e sets off pyro and it spooks Sami! Sami drops, and Knoxville gets the BOWLING BALL! STRIKE to Sami’s boys! Then the Ass Kicking Machine is a GROIN KICKING MACHINE! Sami clutches whatever’s left down there, and Knoxville gets… a STUN GUN!
Knoxville tests them and they’re working! Sami freaks out and scrambles! Knoxville stalks Sami, but Sami turns around into GIANT HAND! Sami gets SMACKED off his feet, but he hurries into the ring! Knoxville hurries in but Sami stomps him down! “This is Awesome!” as Sami manages to snap suplex Knoxville! Sami snarls and goes to the apron. Sami is wary of the corner, but it seems safe now. Sami goes up top, but Knoxville TONGS THE GROIN! And then TOSSES Sami onto the mouse trap table!! Sami crashes down and fans lose their minds! Knoxville calls for help, so Dark Shark, Pontius and the whole crew get the WORLD’S LARGEST MOUSE TRAP out!
Weeman and Pontius puts Sami in the ring and Knoxville stalks behind him. Knoxville has the stun gun, and he ZAPS Sami! Sami is on the trap, Knoxville hurries to trigger it! Uh oh, technical malfunction. Knoxville unhooks the thing by hand, SNAP! Cover, the trap traps Sami, Knoxville wins!!
Winner: Johnny Knoxville, by pinfall
The Jackass cast celebrates with Knoxville! They may be the movie stars, but Sami is the one who is a jackass forever! How will Sami ever live this down?
WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship Fatal 4 Way: Carmella & Queen Zelina Vega VS Sasha Banks & Naomi VS Liv Morgan & Rhea Ripley VS Shayna Baszler & Natalya!
The Most Beautiful Woman in All the WWE (according to herself) and the Queen of the Ring brought much of this upon themselves. They thought they were unstoppable, but then they got stopped by Team Bad, by #Liv4Brutality, and by the Spades & Harts. Now, with only two teams legal at any given time, will they even be active when they lose these belts? Or will they find a way to defy the 75% chance of failure on the most STUPENDOUS WrestleMania ever?
The introductions are made for all four teams, the belts are raised, and we see who plays their hand right to take home the jackpot!
We start with Vega and Rhea but Mella gets her protective mask. Vega turns around to see who is there, and she tags right out! Rhea is fine with that, she and Mella circle. Then Mella tags out to Sasha! The champions are gambling letting other teams handle this. Sasha and Rhea get face to face, fans fire up, and Rhea calls for a test of strength. Sasha gives it with knuckle locks, they go shoulder to shoulder! Rhea pushes Sasha down to a cover, ONE! Rhea pushes the arm down, ONE as the other arm goes up! And ONE again as Sasha bridges! Rhea jumps up, Sasha monkey flips and slips around, but no Bank Statement!
Rhea pump handles, Sasha slips out, but Rhea shrugs the backstabber! Fans rally, Rhea and Sasha stare down, but Liv wants in. Rhea tags to Liv, but then Rhea and Naomi get mugged by the champs and the Queens! Liv and Sasha DIVE to take them all out! Liv and Sasha meet again and they circle. Liv goes Matrix, rolls Sasha, TWO! Sasha drop toeholds, scuffs Liv, swaggers to a Oklahoma Roll! TWO, Liv kicks but Sasha blocks to kick, only for Liv to block! CODE BREAKER! Sasha ends up by ropes, Liv runs in, springboard CODE BREAKER! But Natty tags in off The Boss! Liv hits OBLIVION on Liv, but Natty tags Shayna and BOOTS Liv down!
Natty runs and dropkicks Liv, then BOOTS Liv again! Shayna KNEES Liv for good measure, but she sees Rhea and the champions all get in. Everyone stands down, but it was that close. Shayna gets Liv’s leg isolated, and she STOMPS the foot! Liv writhes, Shayna keeps her from Rhea, and Shayna gets the leg for a HEEL HOOK! Liv endures, Shayna shifts to a toehold! Shayna twists and bends the foot and knee in all directions! Liv kicks with the good leg but Shayna flips her over. Shayna keeps Liv from Rhea but Liv ENZIGURIS! Mella tags in off Shayna, Shayna LARIATS Mella but has to leave!
Mella tells Shayna to go to her corner, but Liv is crawling to her corner! Vega tells Mella, so Mella DECKS Rhea! Rhea wants after her but the ref keeps her back, Mella bumps Liv off her boot, tag to Vega and the champions mug Liv. Vega takes a bow and soaks up the heat. Vega then hops on, CODE RED! Cove, Rhea drags Vega right off and up! Rhea puts Vega on top of the other corner but Mella CLUBS Rhea down! Natty CLOBBERS Mella, but Naomi hits a REAR VIEW! Shayna ROUNDHOUSES Naomi, Sasha BACKSTABBERS Shayna! Mella CLOBBERS Sasha but Rhea is up top! Mella gets her but the steiner is blocked!
Rhea brings Mella up, but Mella finishes the SUPER STEINER! Naomi tags in off Vega and then Vega LEAPS onto Rhea! Naomi tags Sasha, they get Liv up to double wrench, EAT TWO FEET! Tag back to Naomi, Team Bad take opposite corners! Shayna and Vega intercept Naomi and Mella is after Sasha! Natty helps Mella, but then Rhea and Liv each go after them! DOUBLE TOWERS OF DOOM!!! Fans are loving this as all eight women are down! Naomi and Liv are left as the legal two, and Naomi cradles Liv! TWO! Liv gets up, Rhea tags in, Liv hits WING SNAPPER to Rhea’s HEADBUTT!
Rhea then pump handles, Liv adds on, RIPTIDE BACKBRAEKER!! Cover, Sasha breaks it! Shayna gets in to throw Sasha out! Natty gets in to DECK Liv! The Queens POST Rhea, Shayna tags in. Natty GUT BUSTERS Naomi and Shayna KNEES her down! Cover, Liv breaks it! Liv and Shayna fire off, Shayna KICKS a leg to gut wrench SLAM Liv! Shayna tags Natty and they get Naomi back up. Natty runs, Mella tags in! Vega trips Natty, Mella FABULOUS KICKS Shayna! Mella bumps Sasha off the apron, then gets Naomi up. Naomi switches, O’Conner Roll, TWO! Vega KNEES Naomi, Mella rolls and FABULOUS KICKS! Cover, TWO!!
Naomi survives and Mella is furious! She covers again, TWO! Mella throws down fists and loses her cool! Mella goes in, Naomi BOOTS Mella down! Tag to Sasha and Sasha goes up, FROG SPLASH! Cover, TWO!?!? Mella survives, but BANK STATEMENT! Vega drags Mella back, BOOTS Naomi away, and the champions are safe on the outside. But Sasha goes to the apron to METEORA Vega! But Mella puts Sasha in! Mella runs in but Sasha powers her back! Tag to Naomi, ROUNDHOUSE! Tag back to Sasha, they work together, ASSISTED WHEELBARROW FACEBUSTER!! Cover, Team Bad wins!!
Winners: Sasha Banks & Naomi, by pinfall (NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions)
The challengers that got the ball rolling finally get the gold! Will all of the WWE feel the #BossGlow?
Edge VS AJ Styles!
The Rated R Superstar wanted a WrestleMania opponent because as much as he needs this, he feels this event needs him. The Phenomenal One stepped up, but then something changed in Edge. In trying to bring out the vicious side in Styles, Edge almost sidelined Styles for good. But Styles is back, and he already knows he’s going to do something awful back to “The Iconoclast.” Will this dream match turn into a nightmare for Styles? Or will this new Edge be less than phenomenal?
Styles already has a bloody scratch on his cheek, who knows how he got that. Meanwhile, Edge rises in a throne from under the stage with fire all around! The bell rings and fans are fired up already as these two stare down. Styles then rushes in, but Edge uses ropes as a defense. The ref has Styles back off, and Edge grins as he steps away from the ropes. They circle, tie up, and are in a deadlock. Styles manages to push Edge back but the ref counts. Edge avoids the big haymaker and then he trots to the opposite end. Edge smirks as he circles with Styles, but Styles KICKS the leg! Edge is annoyed but he and Styles circle more.
They tie up again, Edge gets the headlock, but Styles fights up to power out. They ram shoulders, Edge runs again but Styles hurdles and dropkicks back! Then Styles arm-drags Edge around, but Edge fakes out the third. Edge drops an elbow but misses and Styles KICKS the leg again! Styles wants the leg but Edge gets to ropes again. Fans rally and duel as Edge and Styles circle again. Styles and Edge tie up, Styles headlocks, but Edge pulls hair. Edge powers out, Styles rolls under to come back and headlock. Edge throws Styles off, but Styles avoids the boot to backslide! Edge rolls through but he wrenches out of the Clash!
Edge ROCKS Styles, but Styles avoids the Spear! Fans fire up as the two stare down. They reset, circling again, and Edge kicks low. Edge throws a forearm, whips Styles to ropes, but Styles slips out. Edge slides out but Styles slips in to ROCK him with a forearm! Slingshot FLYING- NO, Edge moves so Styles lands on the apron. SLIDING KNEE! Edge is sent into steel steps, too! Styles hops down, and dribbles Edge’s head off the side of steel steps! The ring count climbs, Styles drags Edge up and puts him in the ring. Styles then aims, springboards, 450 SPLASH onto knees! Edge saves himself, but he still clutches the knee after that impact.
Fans rally up while both men are down. Edge drags himself up the ropes, and he BOOTS Styles into the corner! Edge digs his knee into Styles’ ribs, then lets off to whip Styles to ropes. Edge KNEES Styles low, then whips him the other way to KNEE the ribs again! Styles falls over and Edge soaks up all the cheers and jeers from the fans. Edge stomps Styles down, then drags him back up to whip hard into a corner! Styles falls back, Edge covers, ROPEBREAK! Edge grabs that arm to add to the cover, ONE! Styles is still in this but Edge drags him back up. Styles ROCKS and CHOPS and ROCKS Edge again!
Styles whips, Edge blocks the hip toss to a cobra twist! Styles endures the stretch but Edge digs knuckles then an elbow into those bad ribs! Fans rally as Styles continues to endure. Styles elbows Edge’s leg, then hip tosses free! Edge gets up, but Styles blocks his kick! DRAGON SCREW! Edge is down and clutching his leg, Styles gets to ropes. Styles rushes back in, but into a scoop and SHOULDER BREAKER! But it was double-edged for Edge with the bad knee. Styles clutches the shoulder, that was the shoulder that got hurt by Edge during the Royal Rumble match. Styles gets to a corner but Edge storms over.
Edge stomps away on Styles but the ref counts. Edge lets off at 4, then KICKS Styles in the side! Edge drops knee after knee on Styles at the ropes but the ref has him stop at 4. Edge comes back, but Styles DECKS him with a haymaker! Both men are down again and fans rally back up! Styles works on his shoulder, and might have just popped it back into place! Styles gets up, Edge also rises, and Styles runs in, but is sent crashing into buckles! Both men are down again as Edge catches his breath. Fans rally, Edge slowly gets up and scowls at Styles. Edge goes to Styles in the corner, brings him up, but Styles snap suplexes Edge into buckles!
Both men are down again after that crash. Styles drags himself up, his left arm rather limp by his side. Styles drags Edge up with his good arm, rains down fists, then hits a new gear as he even manages to hit with his left! That still hurts Styles in return, and Styles stops his flurry. Fans rally and duel as Styles slowly stands back up. Styles drags Edge up, but Edge wrenches and hits an ARM BREAKER! Styles’ bad arm is a target for Edge and he just hit the mark! Edge then gets Styles’ arms for a motorcycle stretch. Styles endures, fights up to his feet, and kicks free to throw an elbow. But Edge avoids the Pele!
Edge drops down, Styles scrambles to avoid the crossface! Styles reels Edge in but Edge fights out of the Clash! Edge has the leg, STF!! Styles endures, reaches out, Edge grabs that arm to shift to full CROSSFACE! Styles uses his leg to get the ROPEBREAK! Edge lets go in frustration and both men are down again. Edge throws hands on Styles, then runs, but Styles avoids the shoulder to KICK Edge back! Edge staggers, Styles SLINGSHOT DDTS! But he can’t make the cover! Fans rally up as Styles goes to the corner and starts to climb. He drags himself up with one good arm, but Edge ROCKS him first!
Edge has Styles stuck in the ropes as he climbs up now, and Edge brings Styles up. Styles throws body shots, then sunset flips, but Edge holds on! Styles KICKS Edge’s leg, and gets him for a torture rack! TOWER HACKER BOMB! Cover, TWO! Both men are down again but fans rally up. Styles stands first, he fireman’s carries, but Edge elbows free! Edge reels Styles in, IMPALER! Cover, TWO!! Styles survives one of Edge’s best, but Edge is too tired to be frustrated. Edge gets up and he throws a forearm on Styles, then another. Styles dodges the next, to SNAP GERMAN Edge away! Both men are down again as the tanks are running on fumes!
Edge pushes himself up, as does Styles, and the fans are fired up again. The haymakers fly as both men are on their knees! Edge hits, Styles hits back, then they stand as they keep going. Styles HEADBUTTS again and again and again! Then fires off a haymaker! Styles blocks, fires off the Phenomenal Blitz, but Edge BOOTS! Styles PELES and Edge is wobbling! Styles rolls Edge, CALF CRUSHER!! Edge turns it over, has the arm, but Styles clasps hands! Styles moves, but Edge gets a LEBELLE LOCK!! Styles endures as Edge pulls him way back! Styles pries at the fingers, he gets free! But Edge ducks the buzzsaw, EDGE-O-MATIC! Cover, TWO!
Fans are rallying up again as both men slowly get back up. Styles is in the corner, Edge runs in but into a BOOT! Styles goes up, but Edge catches him for a SLINGSHOT POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO! Styles rolls out to the apron, Edge goes out after him, and Edge CLUBS Styles on the neck. Edge stands Styles up, puts Styles up top, and he looks to the floor! Edge climbs up, but Styles slips out and CLUBS Edge down! They’re on opposite sides of the corner now, and Styles stands Edge up. Styles drags Edge to the top and goes up to join him. Is Styles going for what Edge wanted?! SUPERPLEX to the apron!!
Fans lose their minds as both men flop to the floor! The ring count starts and both men are still down at 5 of 10. Styles stands up at 9, he and Edge get in at 9.5! Styles drags himself up, takes aim and springboards again, 450 SPLASH to Edge’s back! Cover, TWO!! Edge survives again! Fans rally back up, Styles gets to his feet and he goes back to the apron. Styles prepares the arm, and he springboards, but Edge gets under! Styles rolls through, and hurdles the Spear! Edge hits ropes, Styles reels him in, STYLES CLASH!! Cover, TWO!?!?! How did Edge survive that?!! “This is Awesome!” as Styles gets to a corner.
Styles goes to the apron, and he aims again. Fans fire up, but Damian Priest appears?! Styles ignores him, springboards, into a SPEAR!! Cover, Edge wins!
Winner: Edge, by pinfall
Priest distracted just enough for Edge to get this! The Archer of Infamy gets in the ring with Edge, and kneels with him! These two are of like minds, will they both #LiveForever?
Tonight’s AT&T Stadium attendance: 78,453!
That’s even more than last night! What a STUPENDOUS turnout for WrestleMania 38 Sunday!
The New Day VS Sheamus & Ridge Holland w/ “Butch” Pete Dunne!
Originally meant for last night, Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods finally get to take on the Celtic Warrior and Northern Grit! Will Big E and his ATV be avenged? Or will the Fella and his Fight Night Fight Club have their most STUPENDOUS victory ever?
But before teams sort out, Sheamus & Ridge attack! They beat down Kofi & Woods, stomp them, then take away the Big E tribute jackets! Dunne snatches those to throw them away! But the New Day fight back with big haymakers! Woods dumps Sheamus out, Ridge DECKS Kofi then tosses Woods! The ref has Ridge stay back for Kofi to get up, and the bell rings! Kofi spins Ridge for TROUBLE IN PARADISE!! Cover, Sheamus drags Kofi out of the ring! Sheamus drags Kofi up, Dunne wants after him but Sheamus tells “Butch” to stay back. Woods WRECKS Sheamus with a dropkick!
Woods dodges Dunne, Kofi gets up the corner and LEAPS in to CLOBBER Ridge! Sheamus has to keep Dunne away, Woods tags in! ROLLING ELBOW, HAYMAKER, and the straps come down! Woods runs, to SLIDING COMPLETE SHOT! Then Woods DECKS Sheamus, and Kofi LEAPS, into a BROGUE! Woods is furious but Ridge grabs him by his hair! Ridge reels Woods in, but Woods slips off the back suplex to SUPERKICK! Dunne gets on the apron, the ref is busy with him, Sheamus BROGUES Woods down! Ridge gets back up, he drags Woods up, NORTHERN GRIT! Cover, the fight club wins!
Winners: Sheamus & Ridge Holland, by pinfall
And Dunne goes after Woods! Sheamus & Ridge both have to drag Dunne away but Dunne wants to rip Woods’ ears off! With Dunne as a wild animal at ringside, will anything stop him, Sheamus & Ridge from doing whatever they want on SmackDown?
The Undertaker is here again!
The Deadman, the Phenom, and the headliner of the 2022 WWE Hall of Fame class is back once more for the fans. They chant #ThankYouTaker and he takes one more bow. And of course, he gives one last glance back before one last raise of the fist. Is this the last time we will see Taker on a WWE stage?
Austin Theory VS Pat McAfee!
For weeks on end, Vince McMahon’s newest golden boy has used the Chairman’s lessons and personal backing to do whatever he wants to whoever he wants. But then Vince went onto Pat McAfee’s talk show to give him the great honor of being on the most STUPENDOUS WrestleMania ever… against the golden boy. Theory turned all his obnoxious energy towards McAfee and has really gotten under his skin. Will McAfee use that NFL Pro Bowl level leg to punt Theory’s punk ass all the way back to Atlanta? Or will it be A-Town Down in Dallas?
Before Theory enters, VINCE MCMAHON is here in person! He struts to the ring, gets himself a mic, and says, “Allow me to introduce you to a future WWE Universal Champion, Austin Theory!” Theory now makes his entrance, taking selfies the whole way down the ramp. Vince applauds but it doesn’t sound like many fans are in agreement. Fans chant, “You Suck!” but Vince wants them to quiet down for his selfie with Theory! Now McAfee makes his entrance to Seven Nation Army, with the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders! Fans sing along as McAfee goes down the ramp. McAfee even punts a football to the fans! Free souvenir!
The bell rings and Theory rushes in! McAfee dodges to fire off hands! Theory staggers about, body blow! McAfee then DECKS Theory! Vince is already upset but McAfee storms up and Theory goes to ropes for defense. The ref backs McAfee off, Theory throat chop shim! Theory stomps away, fans boo but Theory tells them he’s the guy! Theory drags McAfee up, ROCKS him with a right, and has him in a corner. Theory whips corner to corner, McAfee goes up and over, then FLYING ELBOWS Theory down! Fans fire up for McAfee, and he runs in to RANA Theory! Cover, TWO! Vince is relieved but still upset with Theory.
McAfee has the fans all behind him and he gets Theory up, only for Theory to scoop and BACKBREAKER! Theory rains down rights and roars in anger, and Vince nods his approval. Fans boo, Theory looms over McAfee and drags him up. Theory DECKS McAfee but fans sing Seven Nation Army for McAfee! Theory just gets upset as he drags McAfee up, and snap suplexes! Theory looks to Vince and gets more approval, but then fans boo and Theory tells them to shut up. Theory drags McAfee back up, reels him in, and fans chant, “You Suck!” Theory says he does not, then he suplexes McAfee again.
Theory does victory laps around McAfee, and he mocks the fans cheering McAfee on. Theory looms over McAfee, fans chant “You Suck!” harder than before! Theory drags McAfee up, reels him in again, but McAfee fights the suplex to hit a suplex! Fans fire up, Byron keeps Michael Cole calm on commentary. Theory gets to the apron, McAfee gets up and checks his back. McAfee runs at Theory to BLAST him off the apron! Theory hits announce desk! McAfee fires up, Vince frowns, and McAfee gets the headset so he can say, “Pat McAfee’s beatin’ the hell outta Austin Theory! Kevin and Sally McAfee are watching their kid beat the hell out of a douchebag!”
McAfee then asks if Theory remembers this! ICE WATER TO THE FACE! Theory flails, McAfee SMACKS him off the desk! And again! And again! He’s even calling his shots! McAfee pushes Theory back into the ring, puts the headset back on the desk, and fans fire up as McAfee gets back in the ring. Vince is upset again, because McAfee has an idea. McAfee goes up the corner! Fans fire up as McAfee is up top, Seven Nation Army is echoing throughout the AT&T Stadium, and McAfee SWANTON BOMB FLOPS!! Austin Theory avoids disaster and Vince is finally happy again. Theory drags McAfee up, reels him in, BIG back suplex! Cover, TWO!!
Now Vince is upset again as McAfee survives. Theory smirks but is also annoyed with McAfee. Theory drags McAfee around to stomp him down, and Vince likes that. Theory says he’ll go up top now! Vince smiles, Theory climbs but fans boo harder. Theory says for them to shut up, but McAfee ROCKS Theory first! McAfee gets up top to join Theory, they fight up there, and McAfee gets Theory for- NO! Theory is fighting it off! Theory pushes McAfee, but McAfee flips to land on his feet?!? No one can believe it but we just saw it! And McAfee box jumps to get Theory, for the SUPERPLEX! Theory writhes, McAfee crawls to the cover, TWO!!
Fans are thunderous as these two are both down. Fans chant “Fight Forever!” but this has to end somehow! McAfee feeds off the energy from Seven Nation Army and the WWE Universe. McAfee lines up the shot, roars, and gets that Pro Bowl Leg started up! But Theory dodges the punt to dropkick the legs out! Theory DECKS McAfee with a forearm! Vince is smiling again as Theory drags McAfee up. Theory says McAfee is dead, but McAfee pie faces him! Theory rains down fists! Fans boo but Theory says McAfee is going down! Fireman’s carry, but McAfee slips out to roll Theory up, AND WINS!!!
Winner: Pat McAfee, by pinfall
HE DID IT! The boyhood dream comes true! McAfee is a WrestleMania winner!! Whether or not Vince likes it, this might be the most STUPENDOUS WrestleMania moment ever! What will Theory have to do to redeem himself in Vince’s eyes? But then McAfee calls out Vince!? Vince starts to take the suit jacket off, but then thinks better of it. But then he takes it all the way off! And then he starts undoing the tie! McAfee dares Vince to get in, but Vince unbuttons the sleeves first. Vince untucks the shirt, takes it off, and he has the fight tank top on! Vince gets in the ring and McAfee himself is stunned speechless!
Wait the ref is back? IS this happening? Is this a thing that is happening?! But then Theory CLOBBERS McAfee! Of course Vince was just setting up someone who pissed him off! Vince still wants this to happen!?
Pat McAfee VS Vince McMahon w/ Austin Theory!
The bell rings and Vince LARIATS McAfee down! McAfee gets up again, but Vince bumps him off buckles! Theory applauds because duh, he hit McAfee dizzy before this match! McAfee gets up, he’s mad now, but Vince LARIATS him again! Vince taunts McAfee, then he taunts the fans. Fans admit, “You Still Got It!” Vince waits on McAfee to get up, and McAfee does, but Vince grabs him by his head! Vince tells McAfee this is what he gets, and he bumps McAfee off the buckles! Vince dusts off his hands, thinking he’s got this in the bag. Vince then waits as McAfee gets up again. McAfee snarls as Seven Nation Army starts up again.
McAfee tells Vince, this time it’s serious! He’s gonna punt his old ass right back to the office! But then Theory trips McAfee! And POSTS McAfee up the middle! The ref hesitates to disqualify this because the boss is right here! Vince smirks and the ref reprimands Theory, but that’s it. Vince toys with McAfee now, and then Theory says they should use the football! Theory hands it off to Vince, and Vince lines it up, to then fake the punt and strut around. McAfee manages to sit up, so Vince PUNTS the ball into McAfee! Cover, Vince wins!
Winner: Vince McMahon, by pinfall
But of course the whole thing was rigged from the start! Vince lets Theory celebrate, since Theory did do most of the damage. Theory even offers a hug? Vince decides to accept it! Since when has Vince hugged someone? BUT HERE COMES STONE COLD!! The better Austin is here and fans are loving it! Stone Cold gets right in the ring, tells Vince this is a bunch of BS, but Vince tries to defend what’s gong on. Theory goes after Stone Cold but gets smacked all around! STUNNER!! Theory goes flying outta the ring!! And Vince realizes he just stepped in it. Fans are electric as Stone Cold stares Vince down.
Vince tries to talk his way out of this, and Austin offers some Steveweisers. Vince is up for that, and they crack those open. Vince sips, and approves. The Broken Skull Stout is good stuff! Austin and Vince cheer, chug it down, and then STUNNER! Just like old times! Austin gets more Steveweisers, then he stomps Vince out of the ring! And Austin even invites McAfee into the ring! They do a double toast as Seven Nation Army echoes through the crowd! And then Austin just gets more beer! And then STUNNER for McAfee! #DTA: Don’t Trust Anybody! But at the same time, maybe a dream come true for McAfee! OH HELL… YEAH!!
WWE World & Universal Championships, Winner Takes All Title Unification: Brock Lesnar VS Roman Reigns w/ The Bloodline!
There is so much history here between these two Paul Heyman Guys. The Next Big Thing became The Beast, and the Big Dog became the Tribal Chief. They have fought back and forth many times, and it frustrates the Head of the Table to no end that he has yet to demolish Suplex City. But now, in the BIGGEST main event in WrestleMania history, to close out the most STUPENDOUS WrestleMania Weekend ever, there can only be one alpha male of our species! Who will be our reigning, defending, and truly UNDISPUTED WWE Champion?
Roman is of course accompanied by The Usos as well as Paul Heyman. The Bloodline raises their titles to the sky and the pyro goes off. Then they go to the ring, raise the belts up again, and set off more pyro while CG Roman roars. Heyman then hands real Roman a mic, so that he can say, “WrestleManiaaaa…! ACKNOWLEDGE ME!” Fans are torn rather evenly, but then here comes Brock! Lesnar circles the ring, gets in and stares Roman right down. The introductions are made, with Heyman of course snatching the mic to introduce himself.
“Introducing first, the GOAT that slays a Beast, the reigning! Defending! Undisputed! WWE Universal Heavyweight Champion! RRRROMAN! RRREIGNS!” Then Heyman gives the mic back so Mike Rome can introduce the opponent, only for Lesnar to snatch the mic! “Ladies and gentlemen! The Cowboy Country Ass-kicker that’s gonna kick your ass tonight! The reigning! Defending! WWE Heavyweight Champion of the Wooorld~! BROCK! LESNAR!” With all that out of the way, the top titles are raised, and tonight, we ACKNOWLEDGE… history!
Fans are already thunderous as these two stare down at the bell. Lesnar literally takes off the gloves! Roman looks mildly concerned, and they tie up. Lesnar fires off shots, knees, then has Roman in a corner for shoulders! Roman hits back with haymakers! But Lesnar RAMS Roman back into the corner! And rams him in again! And again! And then again, before carrying Roman corner to corner! Lesnar RAMS Roman into that corner, then shoves Roman down! Lesnar waistlocks but Roman throws elbows. Lesnar lets Roman slip around, to OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Then another OVERHEAD Belly2Belly!
Suplex City gets going with a THIRD OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Lesnar roars and scares Heyman, then Lesnar clotheslines Roman out of the ring! Lesnar goes out and he scares Heyman again. Heyman says all this was Roman’s idea! Heyman loves Lesnar, he can take Heyman back! But then Roman SPEARS Lesnar through barriers! They crash into the timekeeper’s area and Heyman’s cowardice was the perfect bait! Roman drags himself out of the wreckage, he gets back into the ring, and Heyman holds tight to the Universal title. The ring count climbs, Lesnar gets up at 5 but he’s far away from the ring!
Lesnar gets up at 8, hobbles at 9, and is in at 9.99!! Roman is upset and a bit shocked at this. Lesnar stands up, Roman SPEARS him down! Cover, TWO!! Lesnar survives and shocks Roman all over again! Roman goes back to a corner, locks ‘n’ loads, and waits as Lesnar rises. SUPERMAN PUNCH! Roman talks smack then reloads, SUPERMAN PUNCH! Roman says look at him! Lesnar is getting whooped! Fans are torn down the middle as Roman gloats. Heyman tells Roman to focus, and Lesnar is laughing as he gets up!? Roman runs in, Lesnar gets around, GERMAN SUPLEX! And then another GERMAN SUPLEX!
Suplex City is rolling now with five total! Lesnar gets a third GERMAN SUPLEX, that’s half a dozen suplexes in all! Roman staggers, Lesnar says here we go, another GERMAN SUPLEX! Fans fire up as Lesnar smiles. Roman flounders to a corner, Lesnar calls for another one! GERMAN SUPLEX! Five of those, eight total! Lesnar drags Roman back up again, fireman’s carries, but Roman fights free and shoves Lesnar into buckles! SUPERMAN PUNCH! Three superman punches but Lesnar is still getting up. Roman soaks up all the cheers and jeers, and Heyman points out Lesnar isn’t done yet!
Roman aims, “OOAH!” But Lesnar fireman’s carries out of the Spear, to F5!! Cover, TWO!! Roman survives, but Lesnar still looks amused! Fans rally and duel, Lesnar looms over Roman, and Lesnar drags Roman up. Another fireman’s carry, but Roman rakes eyes! Roman shoves Lesnar at the ref! Then SPEARS him into the ref! The ref is down, Roman LOW BLOWS Lesnar!! The Tribal Chief doesn’t care how he wins, he wants to win! Heyman hands Roman the Universal title belt, he aims and runs in, BELT SHOT!! Roman shouts to the ref to count this cover, TWO!?! Lesnar survives and Roman is confused!
Roman tries to put the math together on how Lesnar survives a low blow and belt shot. Fans rally and duel and Roman says this is his time! He has told us that no one will ever be able to follow him! Roman is the best! Roman is the number one superstar! But somehow Lesnar is sitting back up! Roman tells Lesnar to stay down, but Lesnar doesn’t listen. So Roman runs and runs and SPEARES Lesnar! Cover, ROPEBREAK! Roman is frustrated again but he just builds speed, SPEAR into a Kimura?!? Lesnar catches the tackle and the arm!! Roman is enduring as Lesnar twists the arm way back!!
Roman reaches out, Heyman tries to push the rope closer but it’s not working! Lesnar has the body scissors, even! Roman drags himself with one good arm, ROPEBREAK!! Lesnar holds until the ref counts 4, doing as much damage as he can! Heyman coaches Roman up but Roman says his shoulder is dislocated! But this is for the Bloodline! “Rise up, this is your moment!” Lesnar drags Roman up, he fireman’s carries, but Roman slips out and shoves, to SPEAR!! Cover, Roman wins!!
Winner: Roman Reigns, by pinfall (UNDISPUTED WWE Universal Champion)
And with that, Roman is truly on top of the WWE hierarchy! He manages to lift both titles, despite the left arm’s damaged state. Lesnar gets up with a scowl, has the Beast finally been slain? Is there no one that can stop Roman now that he is THE champion in the WWE?
Again, not sure if this was the “most stupendous” WrestleMania ever, but there was some great stuff. And also some not great stuff, but WWE can’t get everything right (anymore). Whatever reason that delayed New Day VS Sheamus & Ridge to tonight apparently didn’t change anything. That should’ve been a kickoff show, because Vince did New Day dirty. Why can’t New Day win one for Big E? Why does Vince constantly take PB&J and make salads out of them? Yep, I’m reusing my food metaphor from yesterday with Stand & Deliver because this is that booty.
The Raw Tag Triple Threat was a great opener, though. All the teams got to shine, I love that they went with a true Triple Threat where all teams have an active man, and it was awesome for RKBRO to retain. I’m a little surprised Profits stayed Face here but it did work for the moment with Gable Steveson. Steveson got to throw Chad Gable around, that’ll help him hit the ground running now that he’ll be on Raw with all these guys. Omos VS Lashley was a pretty good big man match, but as I was saying on the way to this, it was all a wash. Omos losing is big for Lashley but Lashley was already pretty built up without this. Maybe Omos wants a rematch at WM Backlash?
Sami VS Knoxville, Anything Goes was such a great match. They brought out all sorts of wild stuff, and I love that the Jackass cast got involved. Weeman had an awesome part, and the giant mouse trap finish was genius. Sami will surely complain about this but of course people will point out this was Anything Goes, and Sami will fight whoever it is because of that. The WWE Women’s Tag Fatal 4 was also great stuff, and while it went “two teams legal at a time,” I actually like that for this situation. There were many good uses of the opportunistic tags, and in the end, they made the right move. The champions lost and a SmackDown team wins. Sasha & Naomi will be big hits with these belts on both Raw and SmackDown so that both USA and Fox will be happy.
Edge VS Styles was also great, especially Edge’s King of Brood entrance. And speaking of which, it’s rather ironic Damian Priest is the one joining Edge. The whole time in NXT, it felt like Priest was bordering on being a vampire, and now he’s joining one of the original Brood members. This new Brood, whatever it’ll be called, will be great, and I can’t wait to see where it goes. Then there was everything with McAfee, Theory, Vince and Stone Cold, THAT was the most STUPENDOUS stuff of this whole weekend. Everyone in AT&T Stadium was loving McAfee, he had an amazing performance, got some Jeff Hardy level air in that Swanton, and rightfully won against Theory.
McAfee taking on Vince was wild, but of course Theory gets his Heel heat back helping Vince. And of course everyone got a stunner. McAfee’s living the dream, including taking a stunner. I’m sure McAfee will be fine going back to commentary, but now everyone knows he can easily come back off the desk to throw down with whoever. And then we got a pretty great match out of Lesnar VS Roman, with a lot of good references back to their previous showdowns.
However, there is a lot that feels off with that finish. Roman was talking about the bad shoulder, so was that shoot? Things ended suddenly after that, that is not good story writing if it was a work. Roman should’ve struggled for another two minutes to then get that last Spear and the win. But Vince doesn’t care about pacing or details, only results. At least now he’s finally gotten to make Roman THE guy in WWE history, so good for Vince. But where’s this going to go? Roman VS The Rock? But that’s no less than a SummerSlam match, more fitting of next year’s WrestleMania Hollywood. Again, Vince doesn’t care about pacing with this stuff, just results.
My Score: 8.8/10
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Andrew’s IMPACT Sacrifice Results & Match Ratings: 3.24.2023
Well damn, 24 hours changes everything! Josh is injured and has to vacate the World title! Mickie is also injured but she’s making her announcement during the show. How does IMPACT salvage their two main title pictures at Sacrifice?
Well hot damn, a lot of news popped up in less than 24 hours. So Josh Alexander tore his triceps; so he has to vacate the World Title and he’s being replaced by Steve Maclin in the 6 man match. Mickie James apparently also has an injury, but they are going to turn it into a segment on the show instead of a straight up vacating.
Now from a story perspective this sucks since I loved the Maclin/Alexander segment last night. That’s just me being selfish since I wanted to see that build and Maclin get the big win he deserves. Now he’ll be facing Kushida for the vacated title at Rebellion, and even if Maclin wins it will feel a little flat. Here’s to hoping that when Josh returns from injury they can find a way to bridge the time lost and keep the story going eventually.
.@MeanGiaMiller caught up with @FrankieKazarian and #RichSwann to talk about @Walking_Weapon's unfortunate injury and @SteveMaclin replacing him as their partner TONIGHT at #Sacrifice! #CountdownToSacrifice pic.twitter.com/jdnqk6BLN9
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) March 24, 2023
- Speedball Mike Bailey vs Jonathan Gresham: Bailey wins via Reverse Figure Four – *** 3/4
- Digital Media Championship: Joe Hendry (c) vs Brian Myers: Hendry retains via Standing Ovation – ***
- Gisele Shaw w/Jai Vidal & Savannah Evans vs Deonna Purrazzo: Deonna wins via Venus de Milo – *** 1/4
- Kenny King w/Eddie Edwards vs PCO: PCO wins via Straight Right Chair Punch – *** 1/4
- X Division Championship: Lince Dorado vs Trey Miguel (c): Trey retains via Cradle – *
- IMPACT Tag Team Titles: TMDK (Shane Haste & Bad Dude Tito) vs Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) (c): Bullet Club retains via ABC 1-2-Sweet – ****
- Busted Open Match: Bully Ray vs Tommy Dreamer: Bully wins – ** 1/2
- Time Machine (Kushida, Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley) vs Rich Swann, Frankie Kazarian & Steve Maclin: Kushida wins via Hoverboard Lock – ****
Speedball Mike Bailey vs Jonathan Gresham
With the injuries in the main event, I could definitely see one, or both of these guys; fast tracked into the title scene after Rebellion. And I don’t think anyone would really be mad at that.
A quick tit for tat start, no one really gets any advantage. Just a few quick counters and takeover attempts. They both pause to take in chants from the crowd and then lock up again. Collar and Elbow tie up, they don’t release and both roll one another under the rope and out of the ring. There is an early moment where while he’s against the ropes he pokes Speedball in the eye and then apologizes. So things go back to a technical face vs face, but it could be a precursor.
Technical catch wrestling continues. Wrestling one another down, trying to get positions for small submission picks or limb attacks, but nothing is sticking yet. Gresham does manage to an Indian Deathlock, and then a Reverse Figure Four that Gresham conveniently can’t untangle so the referee has to do it and Bailey is pissed. Gresham tries to explain it, but Bailey lights him up, Gresham falls out of the ring, Golden Triangle Moonsault and now the aggression is starting to pick up. Hamstring Kicks and Chops from Bailey, but Gresham baits the attack and trips up Bailey before attacking the left knee with a grin on his face. Bailey is grounded for a while and Gresham keeps trying to twist off his leg. Eventually some Up Kicks break the submission attempt but Gresham wrestles him down again into a Bow and Arrow Trailer Hitch kind of move. Since Bailey has Tanahashi next week, Gresham must be trying to make Bailey’s knees equal. Good Guy Gresham.
Bailey starts stringing some offense together, but a few Low Dropkicks ruins Bailey’s base and causes him to face plant and the offense is going nowhere. Gresham even goes for the pinfall by trying to hyper extend the leg he’s been working on. Strikes continue to trade, Gresham tries to shoot the half but Bailey kicks off, Hamstring Kick again, Gresham Kips Up but clutches the leg a little, a chance for Speedball but Gresham cradles him to the ground and locks in a Figure Four. Speedball eventually rolls to the apron, Gresham tries to continue the stretching but Bailey kicks him into the post, sweeps the leg and Moonsault Double Knees right on Gresham’s head; Bailey went full Billy Kidman with his offense.
Bailey and Gresham continue to jockey for position on the outside, it looks like it might be a double count out. Gresham gets in at 9, Bailey gets in right at the 10 and the referee allows the match to continue. Some quick offense, Tornado Kicks to the corner, Ultima Weapon misses, Gresham goes for the Figure Four again but Speedball reverses it and Gresham taps pretty quick.
Backstage segment with Brian Myers, Moose joins and says he’ll help him beat Hendry – but then Santino shows up! He tells Moose he’s dumb and just stooged himself out, so he’s banning him from ringside. Who would’ve thunk it, the comedy character brings the logic.
Digital Media Championship: Joe Hendry (c) vs Brian Myers
Myers powders after a few early bumps and then Hendry follows him. Hendry is definitely not fighting with “champion’s advantage”, as is the way for babyfaces. Myers tries to fight back on the floor but a Scoop Slam leaves Myers on the receiving end. Hendry has to roll in to reset the 10 count and Myers catches him.
A few quick attacks, Roster Cut attempt but Hendry gets the goozle on. Standing Ovation attempt but Myers slips it, Chop Block, and continues to hammer down on Hendry. Myers with a Falcon Arrow and a bunch of slightly arrogant offense until he goes for the Crossbody, gets caught again, Sack of Shit, and Hendry is back on the offensive. Pop Up Power – no, slips and a Running Spear from Myers for a 2 count. Myers hits the top rope but Hendry cuts him off, Myers pushes him off, launches and Hendry hits the RKO mid move! Throws Myers into the ropes, Standing Ovation, and Hendry retains!
So Mickie addresses her injury, it seems she broke a rib during the tag match. They are allowing Mickie to hold on to the title until Rebellion. Either she defends it in a 3 way versus Jordynne and the winner of the 4 Way at the Multiverse United show or Jordynne will face the winner of the 4 Way for the vacated title.
Gisele Shaw w/Jai Vidal & Savannah Evans vs Deonna Purrazzo
Deonna starts off angry, Gisele is getting rocked early, they go through a few rope running counter cradles and slides but its just early counter wrestling. Gisele manages to surprise Deonna going for an Armbar, but Deonna counters it, tries the Venus de Milo but Shaw powders. Deonna hits the Baseball Slide, starts beating on Gisele but she slides back in to distract the referee while Savannah clocks Deonna.
Triplicate European Uppercuts from Gisele keep her very comfortably in control. Another distraction to the ref and Savannah swings and connects with Deonna again. Deonna tries to fight from the corner, Gisele grabs Deonna’s feet drapes her across the ropes and drops both knees on Deonna. Gisele drives her knee into Deonna’s shoulder blades and goes for the Chin Lock. Deonna tries to power out, Gisele stifles it a little, but Deonna catches her with a Twisting Neckbreaker. Slow start to the strike exchange but it slowly picks up, Deonna with a beautiful spot of a no look Back Kick right to Gisele’s stomach, Running Knee Lift into the Russian Leg Sweep for 2. Deonna Pump Kick, Gisele Superkick, Deonna bounces off the ropes, Flatliner into Koji Clutch, but Gisele slides back a little to turn it into a pinfall to break the submission.
Both women have wrist control and just swing at each other. Deonna gets the best, one big swing but Gisele ducks it, catches Deonna in Shock and Awe (Backbreaker into Flatliner). Denouement attempt, Deonna grabs at the arm for the Fujiwara attempt but Gisele fights it off. Venus de Milo gets locked in and Deonna holds it a little longer to make a point.
Savannah attacks Deonna afterwards, but Tasha Steelz music hits. Tasha tries to play nice like she’s here to help Savannah, then cheap shots her, fights off Jai with a Tornado DDT kicking off of Savannah. Okurr on Jai and Tasha cleans house and babyfaces herself.
Kenny King w/Eddie Edwards vs PCO
Kenny comes out in an Honor No More shirt, which is a nice way to play into the story.
Eddie tries to get PCO’s attention and then Kenny attacks him right as the bell rings. PCO turns things around shortly, Eddie keeps trying to find angles to give Kenny ambush spots but PCO keeps fighting back. PCO stalks Eddie on the outside and Kenny hits a beautiful Tornillo, then a Scoop Slam as he mocks the whole Frankenstein gimmick. PCO rolls in and Kenny John Woo’s him into the corner and starts Bootwashing his face to talk smack. PCO fires, goozle and just throws Kenny out of the ring.
PCO kicks Kenny from getting back in the ring, looks to do his Senton but “short circuits”. So PCO does a Senton to the wrong side of the ring, crashing but popping right back up, and it apparently helped correct the issue. So Senton onto Kenny, throws him back in, Kenny tries the Eddy Gordo kick but PCO just barrels over him. PCO drapes Kenny in the corner, Codebreaker, into the back of the head Guillotine Leg Drop and now PCO pulls him to the apron.
Here we go, Deanimator attempt – but Eddie cuts him off, PCO kicks him back into the cameras, Kenny gets up and an Iconoclasm bouncing off the apron of the ring! Kenny throws him into the steps, rolls in, things he’s all but won…yet PCO beats the 10 count. “He’s Not Human” chant starts, Frog Splash from Kenny and PCO kicks out and fires at 2. Eddie throws a Kendo stick in the ring to distract the referee from Kenny using a chair. Kenny hits PCO once, PCO shakes it off and has a gameplan. So he actually helps keep the referee distracted to bait in Kenny for another chairshot attempt, but PCO just punches through the chair and knocks out Kenny.
Maclin, Kaz and Rich have a backstage segment. It perfectly shows the story beats of Maclin being annoyed that he put in all this prep and recon on Josh just for the opponent to be flipped. Typical tumultuous team members vibe, but Maclin gets his story beats across beautifully.
Can #RichSwann and @FrankieKazarian trust @SteveMaclin? #Sacrifice pic.twitter.com/TcEZ79IWkC
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) March 25, 2023
X Division Championship: Lince Dorado vs Trey Miguel (c)
Okay Lince comes out in a bathrobe with some cringe ass “Lucha Lit” gimmick. I…hate it. This is probably the first time ever that I want Trey to win. Cause Dorado is cringe as hell. In a game of them both sucking, I’ll pick the style of trash that I can tolerate more…which is Trey.
Lucha counter wrestling with flips over trips and that stupid ass Mirrored Dropkick Spot. I also don’t love the Lince doing the cat mannerisms, but Puma King and a few others have done that…so I guess its more tolerated in Lucha. This whole match has been a little paint by numbers boring Lucha where the moves are done just to pop the crowd but not to actually accomplish anything.
Diving whatever moves they accomplish nothing. Its really hard for me to care about flippy trash matches. Lince hits 2 of the 3 step Moonsaults, but Trey of course no sells and dodges the third, Tiger Wall Kick, but Trey stumbles a little for the Enzuigiri, Trey also hits a sloppy Outside In Tiger Feint…its just sloppy spots for spots sake. I would probably be more entertained if I had Runescape fired up on a different tab. This is just a waste of space, much like both “wrestlers”.
Lince hits a Avalanche Frankensteiner, into a Shooting Star Press but Trey powders. Lince tries that bounce off the corner with his legs spot, but its sloppy. Another sloppy Tiger Feint from Trey, Slingshot Sunset Bomb for 2. These are just stupid moves for stupid sake. Lince tries to cut off Trey from a rope run with a Big Boot but mostly misses, makes the whole cut off exchange look stupid. Trey with a flash cradle during the cut offs for pinfall. Eww…this was garbage.
IMPACT Tag Team Titles: TMDK (Shane Haste & Bad Dude Tito) vs Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) (c)
It is nice to see a variation of TMDK back together. I also enjoyed Tito called Ace and Bey the “Mini Bullet Club” since they’re the juniors heavyweights.
Tito and Bey start off, Bey is trying to show off his speed, Tito gets across the power though. Tito kinda looks like a young Scott Steiner, and he literally tosses Bey back into his corner. Ace tags in, tries to do something but Tito is just too strong. Haste gets tagged in for some flashy yet effective offense. Ace finds something with the Triangle Victory Roll, Bey blind tag, cheap shot on Tito, Russian Leg Sweep + Low Sweep combination into some Click Click Boom. So Bullet Club is showing very nice Junior style synergy. Haste is very loud and animated, so he’s a great one to have eating the offense. Especially when they do their Back Rake goof spot.
Haste finally maneuvers things to tag Tito in, and Haste hands off Ace to Tito and Tito hits a Standing Blue Thunder Bomb. Tree of Woe, Bey tries to come in to break up the spot but the referee is distract, Tito steps up and stands on the groin, nice homage to Petey Williams. We are in Canada. Announce team almost sets up too much meme fodder, and then Rehwoldt steers into it. Rehwoldt said Bey was trying to rush into to get Tito off…paused for a second, which you know Hannifan gave him a look. So then they just pivot to everyone in TMDK being like Australian Sex Pistols. Very clever misdirection.
The match is fun, Bey gets the hot tag, clocks everyone, Haste tries a Lariat, Bey ducks that, flies onto Tito on the outside, comes back in, Tornado Fameasser for 2. Bullet Club goes for a Torture Rack/Triangle Kick combo, but Haste gets out of it. Tito gets tagged in and he start to look like Steve Williams with the Doctor Bomb for 2. Tito hits a big battering ram Dive on Bey to clear him out. Haste Falcon Arrow, Tito Froggy Splash, but Bey breaks it up.
Tito starts getting ping ponged between the two Juniors, Torture Rack/Triangle Kick combination, for 1-2-3? – no Haste comes in the referee says it was in time to stop the 3 count. Tito charges and a beautifully times Superkick + Spinning Back Heel Kick on Tito. He’s dazed, ABC 1-2-Sweet! Bullet Club retain!
Busted Open Match: Bully Ray vs Tommy Dreamer
This is a First Blood Match for anyone who doesn’t know, and Dreamer comes out with an ECW Championship Belt.
Chair duel to start things, ECW replica belt to the face of Bully Ray. Dreamer grabs a soda from a fan, Muta mist on Bully, tries to shove the can into his skull for early blood but no. Bully crotches Dreamer on the guardrail and then picks a fight with Darren McCarty who’s in the crowd. Darren McCarty was the enforcer for the Detroit Red Wings, so its very old school letting the ex sports guy play. Bully also has a great spot where he pulls out a step ladder, then asks the referee to hold it, does the Jimmy Snuka pose and goes for a Splash and misses. Bully gets to rile up AEW and WWF fans all in one spot. Good old school heat. Corny, but good.
Dreamer gets a bag of tacks, Bully fights off the Piledriver, gets the cheese grater but Dreamer hits the Bionic Elbow as a counter. Cheese grater with Dreamer, Dreamer charges, Bully pulls the referee in the corner, so ref bump. Dreamer eventually makes contact with the cheese grater, but there’s no referee and Bully has his back to the camera, so it slow rolls the result nicely. Good Hands hit the ring, on with a towel to see if he can blot the bleeding before the ref comes to.
Bully hits Tommy with pocket tacks instead of pocket sand. Tries to drive Dreamer’s face into the tacks and then Elbow it further down but Dreamer moves. Dreamer grabs the grater again, Bully tries to beg off, screams he’s sorry and now tries to guilt Tommy with his family is going to see this. Dreamer actually stops and then Bully hits him in the balls. Bully busts open Tommy with the tacks, the Good Hands slide in Tommy as the referee comes to, so the referee only sees Dreamer bleeding. Its a solid old school Hardcore match but it was definitely a little too plodding and corny.
Yuya Uemura tries to make the save, then Darren McCarty jumps the railing. This really has turned into ECW, Bully gets a mic, asks him if he really wants to fight and tells security to let him go. LOL – a literal Hockey Fight. McCarty gets the best of things, Good Hands mug him from behind. Triple Powerbomb McCarty through the table.
Scott D’Amore’s music hits! Scott starts stripping like he’s Ric Flair. Bully calls down Scott, but Scott has backup. He calls Rino, Heath, Gresham, Baily and Joe Hendry. Good Hands try to attack Scott…Scott stops him…and HITS A CANADIAN DESTROYER! Can this lead to a Lethal Lockdown match? Team D’Amore versus Team Bully? Give me that…give me some Lethal Lockdown now!
Time Machine (Kushida, Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley) vs Rich Swann, Frankie Kazarian & Steve Maclin
Shelley and Swann start off, and its just a bit of chain wrestling. They both have Hammerlocks, Headlocks, and just twist around to try and find an angle. Shelley speeds things up a little, Shoulder Tackle, rope run, Swann goes down and Shelley puts on the brakes to sink in a quick STF but Rich grabs the rope. Kaz and Sabin tag in and we get some Battle of the Futures nostalgia.
Back and forth, Up and Over, Sabin with the Arm Drag into the Top Wristlock. Kaz fights through, a little more quick counters and fun stalemate spots as they are all having fun with each other. Kushida tags in and points to Maclin. Kaz slaps Maclin’s chest and we all know Maclin isn’t a fun loving babyface like Kaz and Swann, so the tone should start to change. Kushida starts by starting Grounded ala Inoki vs Ali, then manages to trip up Maclin and keep the mat wrestling going, but Maclin finally gets back to hit feet and can finally use his size and power to his advantage. Shelley blind tag, Time Splitters PK to the Arm combo.
Shelley keeps on the arm that got kicks with the Arm Wringer and then a few quick shots to the damaged arm. Kaz makes the blind tag after Maclin uses the middle rope into Shelley’s throat. Kaz and Rich with a little Hip Toss tandem stuff for a near fall on Shelley. But the tone of Rich and Kaz is definitely much different. Shelley fights his way out of the enemy corner, Time Machine triple team, Single Leg Crab, Camel Clutch, Sliding Dropkick from Sabin onto Rich. Kaz is trying to police too much of Maclin’s motion, typical team that doesn’t get along stuff. Rich driven into Kaz in the corner, triple Dropkicks from all of Time Machine.
Kushida tags in, stares down Maclin and then Maclin picks up and throws Rich to Time Machine because you can tell he’s frustrated getting policed with all of his moves. MCMG hold Rich, Kushida hits the Baseball Slide on the restrained wrestler and Kushida does the little Liger spin around pose/taunt and stares down Maclin. Shelley starts with the joint manipulation, and Swann is just getting torn apart. Swann in the Tree of Woe, Sliding Dropkick to Swann’s face, and then the Triple Baseball Slide. Sabin tags in with the Octopus Hold on Rich which he rolls into a pinfall, but Rich kicks out. You hear Maclin say “All you have to do is tag me bitch” – which proves that Maclin is trying to be a team player in his own way.
Rich fights out of the triple team, and chooses to tag in Kaz. Kaz hot tag, exchanges with Sabin which turns into the Guillotine Leg Drop through the ropes, Kaz is taking out everyone right now. Two Springboard Leg Drops…and now a third as all of the Time Machine offense is stopped. Sabin blind tag though gives Time Machine some momentum. Rich tries to come in, gets rocked, Maclin charges, Sabin grabs him and Tornado DDT sends Maclin to powder. Missile Dropkick/Flatliner on Kaz for 2.
Cradle Shock counter, rolling tag to Rich. Avalanche Headscissors, Rich goes to the top rope, Maclin tags himself in, but Time Machine gets rolling. Dragon Screw from Kushida with the Mutoh pose afterwards. Maclin and Shelley are legal, and going back and forth. Double Arm Breaker from Shelley after Kaz tries to get involved. Maclin gets some offense back in, Caught in the Crosshairs form Maclin, Maclin tags in Kaz, Kaz tags Rich, tandem attacks, Cutter form Rich into a 450…1-2-Kushida Kicks out! Swann goes for Phoenix Splash but misses. Flying Armbar from Kushida, triple Submission spot, but Maclin gets out of his and breaks Kushida’s submission. Maclin stares down Time Machine, hits the ropes and gets eaten alive by tandem attacks.
Time Machine goes for a Double Shiranui Tower, but it gets broken up. Outatime lands on Kaz. Sliced Bread lands on Swann. Tanaka Punch blocked, Maclin eats Shell Shock, Sabin gives Kushida a rolling start to throw him onto Maclin like a Spider Monkey and sink in the Hoverboard Lock. Maclin taps relatively quick, which is strategic to not risk injury.
Overall Score: 7/10
Talk about a show that no one knew what the hell to expect! Josh vacating the belt means that things had to change with fairly short notice. Mickie’s implications of either a Triple threat or she’ll hand over the belt to the winner if she’s not cleared is something you don’t see too often. But when it comes down to the card, the show was relatively good. Trey & Lince was hot garbage, and Busted Open was what we all kind of expected. Was it a bit more entertaining with some of the ECW nods? Sure. But it was just a spectacle and honestly Scott D’Amore hitting the Canadian Destroyer made that all worth it.
OH CANADA! @ScottDAmore CANADIAN DESTROYERS @TheJasonHotch and Windsor EXPLODES! #Sacrifice pic.twitter.com/iqqpiH0tMZ
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) March 25, 2023
The tag and six man matches were the best stuff on the card, and sets the stage decently well for storylines into Rebellion. I’m not joking though, if we don’t get Team D’Amore vs Team Bully in a Lethal Lockdown…the salt will pour. Don’t let the Canadian Destroyer spot be for naught! Oh – and put the damn belt on Maclin!
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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (3/24/23)
It’s a family feud!
Wrestling really does have more than one royal family.
While Cody Rhodes is back on SmackDown to take on Ludwig Kaiser, Dominik Mysterio plans on confronting in his entire family in Las Vegas! Will Rey finally snap on his son?
- Cody Rhodes VS Ludwig Kaiser w/ Giovanni Vinci; Cody wins.
- Rey Mysterio VS LA Knight; Knight wins.
- WrestleMania Women’s Tag Team Showcase Qualifier: Lacey Evans & Xia Li VS Shotzi Blackheart & Natalya; Shotzi & Natalya win and advance to WrestleMania.
- “Butch” Pete Dunne w/ The Brawling Brutes VS GUNTER; Gunther wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
Cody Rhodes VS Ludwig Kaiser w/ Giovanni Vinci!
The American Nightmare is back on SmackDown, looking to stay razor sharp for his match with the Tribal Chief. But will he get more than just a tune-up from the Impeccable German? Or will Kaiser keep the mat sacred?
The bell rings and the two circle. Fans rally up for “CODY! CODY!” Ludwig eggs Cody on, they tie up, and they’re in a deadlock. Cody powers Ludwig to a corner but Ludwig turns it around. Ludwig lets off, but throws a body shot! Ludwig whips, Cody reverses and reels Ludwig in to suplex! Fans fire up as Cody keeps Ludwig in the air, before the GOURD BUSTER! But wait, here comes Paul Heyman. Cody is distracted by the Wise Man, Ludwig waistlocks, but Cody trips Ludwig to then SHINING WIZARD! Ludwig bails out while Cody glances back at Heyman. Fans continue to rally for Cody while SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns and Cody staggers over to Ludwig. Ludwig UPPERCUTS then COMPLETE SHOTS! Cover, TWO! Ludwig scowls, and he rains down fists in a headlock! Fans boo but Ludwig lets off. Ludwig clamps onto Cody with a chinlock, then CLUBS him down. Fans boo as Ludwig goes outside to drag Cody to the corner, but Cody YANKS Ludwig into the post! Cody goes out to CHOP Ludwig, ROCKS him, and then CHOPS him against the announce desk! Cody rains down fists and fans fire up! Cody puts Ludwig back in the ring, runs and springboards, but Ludwig trips him up and YANKS him down!
Heyman is stoic as Ludwig sits Cody up to PENALTY KICK! Cover, TWO! Cody scowls but Ludwig looms over him. Ludwig pie faces Cody, drags him up but Cody ROCKS Ludwig and JABS and throws a body shot. Ludwig throat chops in return! Ludwig CHOKES Cody on the ropes, the ref counts and Ludwig lets off. Fans boo, but Vinci gets a cheap shot! Cover, TWO! Ludwig clamps back on with a chinlock. Cody endures, fans rally up, and Cody fights up to his feet. Ludwig throws Cody down by his hair! Fans boo more as Ludwig paces around and taunts Cody. Ludwig rains down more fists, then scrapes Cody’s face!
Ludwig runs to BASEMENT UPPERCUT! Cover, TWO! Heyman is still stoic as Cody drags himself to ropes. Ludwig kicks the ropes to jam Cody’s arm! Ludwig drags Cody up to UPPERCUT! Cody ROCKS Ludwig with forearm after forearm! Ludwig JAWBREAKERS! Ludwig throws body shots and stomps in the corner, whips corner to corner, then runs in, but Cody puts him on the apron! Cody ROCKS Ludwig, and BEAUTIFUL DISASTER KICKS Ludwig down! Fans fire up and Heyman is upset now. Ludwig staggers up into a kick, and Cody reels Ludwig in! Cody hooks the arms, but now SOLO SIKOA appears!
Fans boo as the Bloodline approaches, but Ludwig CHOP BLOCKS Cody’s leg! Solo and Heyman stay at the ramp as Ludwig goes out. Cody throws hands, whips, but Ludwig reverses and sends Cody crashing into steel steps! Fans boo but Cody drags himself up, and SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns again and Cody throws hands on Ludwig. Ludwig headlocks, Cody powers out and things speed up, but DOUBLE LARIATS take both men down! Solo & Heyman are now ringside as fans rally up. Vinci coaches Ludwig but Cody sits up first. They stand, Cody throws a body shot but Ludwig throws a haymaker. Cody throws a forearm, Ludwig gives it back, they go shot for shot, back and forth, faster and faster, and fans fire up! Ludwig kicks low, whips, but Cody reverses to then follow and CLOBBER Ludwig! Cody kicks, RHODES UPPERCUT! Cody then baits Ludwig, goes up and over in a corner, and POWERSLAMS! Cover, TWO!
Solo is stoic, Heyman smiles, but then Vinci throws in his track jacket. The ref gets that out of the way, but misses the HIGH LOW COMBO from Imperium! Cover, TWO!! Cody survives and Ludwig is surprised. Ludwig shouts “NEIN!” and runs in to UPPERCUT, GAMANGIRI and HALF HATCH SUPLEX! Ludwig goes up top, leaps, but into a dragon sleeper! But Ludwig drops to victory roll! TWO, and Cody dodges Ludwig to springboard, CODY CUTTER! Fans fire up as Cody stares down Heyman & Solo! Cody waits on Ludwig, reels him back in, CROSS RHODES!! Cover, Cody wins!
Winner: Cody Rhodes, by pinfall
The Impeccable German was less than perfect, and he loses to the American Nightmare! But Cody watches Solo get up on the apron and Heyman has the mic. Heyman has Solo stand down, and then tells Cody, “You’re owed an apology. And since I’m the Wise Man of the Bloodline, may I? I am going to be the one to deliver that apology to you.” The ring announcer did a lousy job. She must be from Vegas. Fans boo and Heyman acts surprised. But Heyman will do the honors. “Ladies and gentlemen! Your winner… and still challenger for the reigning! Defending! Undisputed! WWE Universal Heavyweight Champion, Roman Reigns… Cody! RRRRHODES!”
Fans are torn but Heyman says this is the very same Cody Rhodes that sees his Road to WrestleMania with a giant pothole in front of him that happens this Monday Night Raw, when Cody goes one versus one against… SOLO! And if, and isn’t that a big “if,” IF Cody survives Solo, then it’s not the Road to WrestleMania. All roads lead to Roman Reigns, who will be here live on SmackDown next Friday to see Cody one final time face to face. Heyman tosses the mic to Cody and he catches it. “Is that what we’re doing, Mr. Heyman? Are you moving the goal posts for me? Another thing you did, you interrupted them while they were singing the song.
“And now, you wanna move the goal posts and move ’em right here, huh? Am I expected to say ‘No?’ Oh, it’s six days out from the biggest match in the history of my family, I should probably say no, right? WELL, I probably shouldn’t have wrestled with half my body hanging off, and I still beat Seth Rollins! So when it comes to you,” he says as he points at Solo, “undefeated and as good as you are, like I said last week. You’re. Not. Ready!” Fans chant that, then Cody continues.
“And as for the champion, Roman Reigns. After Solo finds out that he’s not ready, at WrestleMania on April 2nd, your boy, Roman Reigns, the Undisputed WWE Universal Champion, will find out the same thing. He is not ready, either!” Cody throws the mic back and Heyman misses it! Will everything about this homestretch to Hollywood be a nightmare for The Bloodline?
BREAKING NEWS for WrestleMania!
The very first match of night one on Saturday, April 1st will be… AUSTIN THEORY VS JOHN CENA! The United States Championship will set the pace for the weekend, will The Now find that he’s not ready, either?
Charlotte Flair is here!
Vegas fires up as The Queen heads to the ring. The SmackDown Women’s Champion has her pyro then gets the mic to tell Las Vegas, “We are just eight days away from WrestleMania! Fourteen times. Fourteen time world champion. And I can tell you, that was not built on fear, insecurities or nepotism. The same three things have been used against me by everyone, and I mean everyone, since I started in this business.
“Fear. What is fear? Fear is a lack of understanding. It’s ignorance. This business wasn’t built on fear. This business was built on respect! Rhea Ripley, I don’t fear you. I respect you! The only thing that I fear is my own potential. I respected Nikki and Brie. I respect Sasha, Bayley, Becky, Trish, Ronda, Asuka, Natty! I respected all of them! Insecurities. Damn right I have insecurities! Are you really ‘whatting’ me? This is important to me so listen. Insecurities, damn right I have them. And I have built this house on every brick that all of you have thrown at me! For the last seven YEARS! Lastly, nepotism.” Fans “WOO~!”
“That’s right, Vegas. I love my dad. And I will never apologize for continuing the greatest legacy in sports entertainment! And whether you like it or don’t like it, you better learn to love it, because diamonds are forever, and so is Charlotte Flair. WOO~!” The Queen is fired up, but will she be able to hold her throne at WrestleMania?
Rey Mysterio VS LA Knight!
The King of Lucha Libre, the headliner of this year’s WWE Hall of Fame class, has been pushed and pushed and pushed by his punk of a son, and the Mega Star was one big mouth too far! Will Rey be able to shut up the obnoxious jerk that isn’t Dominik? Or will things only get worse for Rey on the Road to WrestleMania Weekend?
SmackDown returns and Knight makes his entrance. The bell rings and the two circle. Knight chases Rey but Rey dodges and fires off hands! Knight shoves Rey away, but Rey slides under and dropkicks Knight to a corner. Rey runs in but Knight fights off the monkey flip. But Rey avoids the elbow drop! Rey runs in, and now he MONKEY FLIPS! Knight staggers up,. Rey KICKS Knight to a corner, and then rains down fists! Fans count all the way to TEN, then Rey gives us some Latino Heat. Rey runs, but Knight FLAPJACKS him down! Knight stomps Rey, stomps him to ropes, but the ref counts.
Knight lets off, “YEAH!” Then he bumps Rey off a buckle. Knight throws hands, JABS Rey, then digs his boots in. The ref counts, Knight lets off at 4, and Knight brings Rey up. Knight shoves Rey into the corner, Rey bounces off buckles, and into the NECKBREAKER! Knight spells it out, “L! A! KNIGHT! YEAH!” Cover, ONE!! Knight is annoyed and he throws fists down. Knight keeps on Rey, throws hands, then he bumps Rey off buckles. Fans rally and duel, but Knight whips Rey to ropes. Rey ducks ‘n’ dodges then tilt-o-whirls to RANA! Knight flounders out of the ring and fans fire up!
Rey runs, WRECKS Knight with a dropkick, then he builds speed. Rey SLIDES to SPLASH! Fans fire up for that one, and Rey stalks Knight to CLUB him! Rey puts Knight in the ring, climbs up and shoulders in! Then he GAMANGIRIS Knight away, climbs the corner, but here comes Dom! Dom said he’d ruin the fun, and Knight trips Rey up! Rey tumbles to the mat, but Dom doesn’t care. Fans boo as Dom walks down the ramp while SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns again and Knight stomps away on Rey again. Knight drags Rey up but Rey throws hands! Rey fires off but Knight knees low! Knight scoops, Rey slips off and rolls Knight up, to then dropkick! Fans fire up while Knight scrambles around. Knight goes after Rey, Rey slips under and runs, but into a BOOT! Cover, TWO! Dom paces at ringside, and Knight sits Rey up to KNEE him in the back! Knight drags Rey up, back suplexes high and hard, then dusts off his hands. “YEAH!” Knight grins as he stands over Rey, then he pulls on the mask. The ref reprimands, Knight whips Rey to ropes, but Rey ducks ‘n’ dodges!
Rey CROSSBODIES, but Knight catches him for a POWERSLAM! Dom smirks while Knight spells it out again. “L! A! KNIGHT! YEAH!” But Rey avoids the elbow drop! Rey and Knight slowly stand up, Rey goes to ropes and Knight storms over, but into an elbow! Rey springboards, wheelbarrows and BULLDOGS! Dom is annoyed but Rey goes to the apron. Rey climbs up, SEATED SENTONS! And Rey keeps moving, SPRINGBOARD CROSSBODY! Cover, TWO! Knight is still in this but Rey brings him up to whip him to ropes. Knight reverses, kicks low and back suplexes, but Rey lands on his feet! Tilt-o-whirl, but Knight blocks to a BACKPACK SLAM! Cover, TWO!
Knight grows frustrated but he drags Rey back up. Fans rally for “619! 619!” as Knight scoops, but Rey turns slam into DDT! Rey then dropkicks Knight onto the ropes! Fans fire up, Rey dials it up, 619 BLOCKED by Knight! Knight grins, lifts Rey up, but Rey RANAS free! Rey redials, but Dom trips him up!! Fans boo and Rey is furious! He can’t believe Dom is doing this now, but Knight rolls Rey up! KNIGHT WINS!!
Winner: LA Knight, by pinfall
Dom smiles because he just screwed his dad over. Dom gets the mic and tells, “Jefe… You gonna give me what I want? Huh? C’mon. C’mon Or are you gonna run away? Or are you gonna finally be a man and face me at WrestleMania?” Dom pushes Rey, and Rey brings down the straps. To wag his finger, “No.” Dom says, “That’s right. Walk away like you always do. Hey, mom. How does it feel to be married to such a pathetic loser? A coward who can’t even stand up to his own son?” Fans boo but then Dom points out the rest of the family. He asks if mom knew she married a deadbeat.
She did, because here’s why. She sat there every night while Rey abandoned Dom, sot hat makes her no better! His sister steps up now, and Dom asks Aalyah what she’s gonna do about it. She’s too stupid to understand this. Mom Angie snatches the mic from Dom but Dom snatches it back to tell her to shut up! Rey storms back over and fans fire up! Dom dares Rey to do something, and Rey DECKS Dom!! Dom is shocked but Vegas is thunderous! Rey tells Dom that Dom pushed him to do this. Rey doesn’t wanna do this but Dom gave him no choice! You do not disrespect your mother like that! That is Rey’s wife!
Dom wanted a fight at Mania? Then he’s on!! Fans are thunderous again as Rey says, “I’ll see you at WrestleMania, son.” Dom scurries away, having gotten what he wanted like the brat he is. But will Dom come to regret everything he’s done these past few months?
WrestleMania Women’s Tag Team Showcase Qualifier: Lacey Evans & Xia Li VS Shotzi Blackheart & Natalya!
The Model Soldier teams with The Predator to take on the Wild Child and the Queen of Harts! Liv Morgan & Raquel Rodriguez are watching ringside, who will they see join them in this Fatal 4 Way tag team showcase?
The teams sort out, Shotzi and Lacey start. Fans rally as Shotzi and Lacey circle, then Shotzi gets around to a waistlock. Shotzi ripcords, wrenches and wristlocks but Lacey throws Shotzi by her hair! Cover, TWO! Lacey drags Shotzi up and fans rally as Lacey whips her to the corner. Lacey RAMS into Shotzi, tags Xia, and then mocks the fans. Xia stomps Shotzi, brings her up to CHOP, then taunts Natty. Xia runs in to KNEE and ELBOW Shotzi, then reels her in for an EXPLODER! Cover, TWO! Natty rallies the fans behind Shotzi but Lacey tells them to shut up. Xia bumps Shotzi off buckles and tags in Lacey.
Lacey mocks the fans, then runs to headstand and BRONCO BUSTER! Lacey drags Shotzi up, snapmares and then dribbles Shotzi’s face off the mat! Cover, TWO! Fans rally but Lacey drags Shotzi up. Shotzi throws hands, kicks but Lacey blocks to trip her up! Lacey then sucker punches Natty! Fans boo but Shotzi rolls Lacey up! TWO and Shotzi ENZIGURIS Lacey down! But Natty is still off the corner so Shotzi has to BOOT Lacey away! Shotzi runs but Lacey CLOBBERS her! Cover, TWO! Fans rally up but Lacey tags Xia. Lacey & Xia drag Shotzi up, double whip but Shotzi KICKS Xia and JAWBREAKERS Lacey!
Xia waistlocks Shotzi, Lacey storms up, but Shotzi slips free and the WOMAN’S RIGHT takes out Xia!! Lacey is furious, but Shotzi whips her out of the ring! Shotzi swings on Lacey, Lacey counter punches, but Natty is back! Natty BOOTS Lacey, then Shotzi DIVES to take Lacey down! Fans fire up as Shotzi hurries back in and tags Natty! HART ATTACK! And then the SHARPSHOOTER! Xia taps, Natty & Shotzi win!
Winners: Shotzi Blackheart & Natalya, by pinfall (advance to WrestleMania)
Two hearts and a lot of fire, these two make it through! But wait, here come Ronda & Shayna! Shayna says, “Look at all the history in the ring right now! I mean, each single one of those women has a reason to want to get revenge on us, right? Let’s look. Broken hand, broken nose, broken arm, broken spirit. What do you say we uh… Give them the opportunity tonight?” Fans fire up as the Baddest Women on the Planet step up, but then Ronda says, “Wait, Shay-Bayz. I’ve got a question for you. How many times have we sold out this exact arena?” A couple times. And what about this entire town? A couple more times.
And how much did they appreciate it? ZERO TIMES! These two have given Vegas more than it deserves, so never again! And certainly not tonight. Shayna agrees with that. But lucky for the others, or maybe unlucky, these two are here to let them know, they’re in the tag team showcase! WrestleMania may be taking place in Hollywood, but the stakes just got raised like here in Vegas! Who wins when the odds are not in their favor?
Drew McIntyre heads to the ring.
Vegas fires up as the Scottish Warrior, Celtic Warrior and Der Ring General are about to converge for a contract signing! The Triple Threat for the Intercontinental Championship isn’t until WrestleMania, but will things break down on SmackDown?
SmackDown returns and Adam Pearce is in the ring to welcome us to this contract signing. But before he can introduce McIntyre, Sheamus and the Brawling Brutes make their way out! “Las Vegas, what’s the crack?” Sheamus says everyone’s been asking why he’s so mad at McIntyre. Imagine this: imagine working 15 YEARS of your life to achieve a particular goal; now imagine telling your best friend about that goal, only for him to go behind your back to try and steal it away from you. Imagine that friend being someone you let sleep and live on your couch, that you brought to his first training session in this business!
McIntyre rolls his eyes as Sheamus has said a lot of this before. Sheamus says, “Now imagine getting the opportunity to smash that person’s face in on the Grandest Stage of Them All, because they’re nothing but a backstabbing-” McIntyre says, “Imagine shutting up for a second. Every week, you run your mouth, you try to give me this guilt trip, trying to make me feel bad. And if it’s not on SmackDown, it’s on social medial with your little gifs and memes you create, blow up my Twitter like a teenage girl. It’s embarrassing, mate!”
McIntyre says last week, they were in this ring, proving why they are the most physical superstars in the WWE! They beat the hell out of each other! And afterwards, they should’ve been in the bar, laughing about it. That’s what they did in the old times. But now, Sheamus is so sensitive, he has this temper, that Sheamus can’t separate personal and business. Sheamus says McIntyre made this personal! McIntyre has a lot he’d love to say but he’ll stick to facts. And the facts are: McIntyre has beaten Sheamus, and he KNOWS he can beat Gunther. And history has shown that Sheamus can’t. Fans fire up as the two stare down.
Pearce has both men stand down because in order to get to WrestleMania, he needs three signatures on the contract. So how about we get the first two taken care of now? McIntyre takes the pen, signs his part, and then hands things over to Sheamus. Sheamus takes another pen, he signs his part, and then McIntyre throws his pen to the crowd as a free souvenir. And here comes GUNTHER! Gunther storms right into the ring, he gets right in Pearce’s face, and he tells Pearce to justify this decision. Justify why Gunther is in a match where the other two can pin or submit the other and Gunther still loses his title. Justify it! JUSTIFY IT!!
Pearce has Gunther calm down now, and Gunther signs his part. Is Pearce happy now? Whatever he has to do to defend HIS title at WrestleMania will be justified. Gunther will beat McIntyre. He will beat Sheamus. And if he has to, he’ll beat up Ridge and- What is Dunne looking at him like that for? DUNNE JUMPS THE TABLE TO GET AT GUNTHER!! Fans go wild as Butch goes wild! Ridge drags Dunne away, Gunther TOSSES the table! Gunther gets in Pearce’s face and Gunther wants a match! Pearce says okay, just calm down! Is Der Ring General about to break the Bruiserweight?
“Butch” Pete Dunne w/ The Brawling Brutes VS GUNTER!
SmackDown returns, and Gunther has Dunne on the ropes. Dunne pulls on Gunther’s ears! Then CHOPS and CHOPS and CHOPS! Dunne runs, but into a BOOT! Gunther drags Dunne up, scoops and SLAMS him, then sits him up to PENALTY KICK! Dunne kicks back from below! Dunne forearms, CHOPS, SLAPS and then jumps on for a a DOUBLE WRISTLOCK! Gunther throws body shots and then shifts Dunne around into a BUTTERFLY SUPLEX! Fans fire up while Gunther paces around Dunne. Gunther kicks Dunne in the side, he taunts Sheamus, then he stomps Dunne down.
Gunther brings Dunne up but Dunne throws body shots! Dunne forearms, but Gunther CHOPS Dunne off his feet! Even McIntyre is feeling that one. Gunther drags Dunne up, and CHOPS him right back down! But Gunther holds onto the wrist and he brings Dunne up again. Gunther CHOPS Dunne inside-out! Gunther still holds the wrist and he gives toying kicks to Dunne while taunting Sheamus. Gunther ripcords, but Dunne uses that for a TRIANGLE HOLD! Gunther CHOPS Dunne down, into a BOSTON CRAB! Dunne endures, Sheamus and Ridge coach Dunne, and Dunne fights, only for Gunther to shift to an STF!
Dunne still endures, even as Gunther bends him back. Dunne pries free, wrenches the arm and bends the fingers! Gunther pulls hair, then CHOPS Dunne down! Gunther drags Dunne back up but Dunne ENZIGURIS! And ENZIGURIS again! Gunther wobbles, blocks the third enziguri and deadlift GERMAN SUPLEXES! Dunne goes to a corner, Gunther hauls him up onto the top rope to CHOP! Gunther climbs up and he STANDS on Dunne! Dunne endures and the ref counts, Gunther lets off and Dunne tumbles to the floor! Sheamus checks on Dunne, Gunther stands tall, and SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns again and Gunther has Dunne on the ropes. Gunther taunts Sheamus, but Dunne catches his Beats of the Bodhrain! Fans fire up as Dunne bends the fingers, and SNAPS them!! Gunther staggers away, Dunne runs in to fire forearms! GAMANGIRI! Gunther staggers, Dunne goes up and fans chant for the “BRUISERWEIGHT! BRUISERWEIGHT!” as Dunne DOUBLE STOMPS the arm! Dunne waistlocks, but Gunther switches and puts on a SLEEPER! Dunne drops down, but powers up and he pries at the hold! Gunther holds on tight, Dunne reaches for ropes, and fans rally up, ROPEBREAK!
Gunther SLAPS the arms down, GERMAN SUPLEXEs, but Dunne lands on his feet! BUZZSAW! Gunther bails out and McIntyre smirks. Dunne goes to the apron but Gunther avoids the moonsault! Gunther CHOPS Dunne, and Dunne tumbles onto the desk! Gunther turns around to see Sheamus and McIntyre, but Dunne runs in! Gunther sends him into McIntyre! Gunther BOOTS Dunne into the ring! But Dunne STOMPS the hands and BUZZSAWS Gunther! Fans fire up, but McIntyre is on the apron! Sheamus drags McIntyre down! GLASGOW KISS from McIntyre! Ridge goes after McIntyre but McIntyre POSTS him!
Sheamus KNEES McIntyre down! Dunne runs in at Gunther, into a LARIAT!! Gunther drags Dunne up, scoops for the LAST SYMPHONY!! Cover, Gunther wins!!
Winner: Gunther, by pinfall
Der Ring General used his enemies against each other, but The Fella stands back up. They both look at the WrestleMania sign, but Sheamus gets out of the way! CLAYMORE hits Gunther!! Fans fire up as Sheamus and McIntyre stare down now, will either of these men come away the NEW Intercontinental Champion in Hollywood? Or will Gunther use them against each other then like he did tonight?
The Street Profits are fired up backstage.
Montez Ford says that Intercontinental Championship Triple Threat is bound to be a banger. But he says there’s one thing bigger than that. Angelo Dawkins asks what, and Ford says THEIR tag team showcase. Alpha Academy, Viking Raiders, Braun Strowman & Ricochet, but wait. What do they have in common? Ford motions to the top of the head. Oh, right. They’re “smooth operators~.” But then Braun & Ricochet walk in. Real funny, guys. Y’all got jokes, huh? They got a problem with bald men? They don’t have a lot of room to talk, Dawkins is thinning up top. Whoa, fam, c’mon. Just jokes! Just playing. Well no one’s laughing.
Dawkins is just saying, Braun & Ricochet aren’t much of a tag team. Oh, well, we’ll see who’s playing when Ricochet & Braun show up and the other three teams fool around and find out. They want ALL that smoke. Well, okay, okay. Everyone is fired up for WrestleMania, but who wins the tag team showcase at the Showcase of the Immortals?
It’s the SmackDown return of the Kevin Owens Show!
And as such, Kevin Owens himself is headed to the ring. His guest will be Sami Zayn, but what will the Prizefighter and Great Liberator have to say about their coming Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championship match? We’ll see, after the break.
SmackDown returns one more time and Kevin has his set and his mic. He thanks the ring announcer for the introduction, and then welcomes us back to the KO Show. Now please welcome his guest, tag team partner, friend and brother, the one and only Sami Zayn! Sami makes his entrance and the fans fire up again. Sami gets a mic and Kevin says, “Yeah, so I did it right? The way you wanted. It worked out?” Sami asks what Kevin means. Well, he brought Sami out with the big introduction like he wanted. It was good, right? Sami says he didn’t want a big introduction, this is Kevin’s show, and Sami’s the guest.
Yeah, but earlier, Kevin suggested they come out as co-hosts but Sami said they should make separate entrances so the fans can hear both of their songs and cheer for both of them. Which really means Sami wanted his own pop. Sami says he did not, but Kevin says it’s fine, the fans love him! Kevin gets it. Fans do cheer for “SAMI! SAMI!” Kevin sits, Sami asks if they need to spill more backstage secrets, or can they just get to business? Yeah, of course. Sami says more than anyone, he’s been going non-stop about taking down Roman, the Usos, the Bloodline. And even Sami has lost sight of the fact that, does Kevin realize what they’re on the verge of doing?
“After all these years, from where we started, from nothing, staring together in Montreal all those years ago, we are on the verge of winning the WWE Undisputed Tag Team Championships! We are on the verge of doing that together, at WrestleMania! And not just any WrestleMania. This year, I don’t know what it is, but WrestleMania feels different this year.” Kevin says that’s right. And it isn’t lost on him. He knows what they can accomplish. But Sami is right, WrestleMania does feel different this year. Which is why Kevin brought Sami out here. Kevin has something for Sami.
Now, remember a few months ago, after Roman gave Sami that Honorary Uce shirt, that Kevin said Sami needed a new one. Kevin has one, it’s a KO-Mania Goes Hollywood shirt. That’s great! Well yes, but this is the back of it. Kevin does KO-Mania every year. But this year is different. This year isn’t about KO-Mania. “This year, there is only one person who took WWE by storm, who caught fire like no one else. There’s only one person that people can look at and say, ‘That guy has been the MVP of the WWE for the last 12 months,’ and that person is you,” Sami. Fans chant “MVP! MVP!” and Sami is rather touched.
Kevin says this year, it isn’t KO-Mania. It’s about the other side of the shirt. Kevin hands it over, Sami turns it around, and he sees… WrestleZAYNIA!! Sami’s all fired up now! Kevin shows that he’s been wearing one the whole time! Sami loves it! He throws off his shirt to put on the new shirt! Sami wants a hug but Kevin says no, one hug a year. Aw what the heck? THEY HUG! But then THE USOS attack!! They blindside KO & Sami from the crowd side, and then Jimmy rains down fists on Kevin while Jey rains down fists on Sami! Fans boo while the Usos clear the ring of the chairs. DOUBLE SUPERKICKS for Kevin!
Jey drags Sami up, whips him to ropes, and the Usos hit ONE AND DONE!! The fans boo more but Kevin gets up with a steel chair! The Usos run for it, telling KO & Sami that they’re going down! Kevin beats an armchair with the steel chair, but Sami tells the Usos that they’re not getting away with this one. Will Jimmy & Jey ruin the first ever WrestleZaynia? Or will KO & Sami be the ones to finally stop the ones?
A great episode for SmackDown here, especially with the story developments. For one, great closing moment we just saw with a great KO Show. I love that we got a positive swerve where Kevin gave Sami a shirt that had a WrestleZaynia logo on it. But I should’ve figured the Bloodline would do something, and the Usos technically stand tall here. That math would suggest the Usos are losing at WrestleMania, and we finally get so much in that moment, from vindication for Sami to the WWE Grand Slam for Kevin. We also got a really good match out of Cody VS Ludwig that Cody of course wins, and a really good promo segment right after for Cody and Heyman. The Bloodline is definitely desperate to hold onto everything, but that could be what brings them down.
Fairly big news with Theory VS Cena opening WrestleMania Night One. I’ve said before that it just feels like Theory is gonna win, since Cena doesn’t need the US title, and isn’t gonna be sticking around long enough to do anything with the US title. So if Theory wins the first match of the weekend, I could see him boasting, bragging and partying the entire weekend until he is just insufferable and annoys someone into challenging him for that title on the Raw After Mania. And then a pretty good promo from Charlotte, and I did like her calling out the “WHAT” chants here. Stone Cold Steve Austin is timeless, but lemming fans throwing out “WHAT” just to throw out ‘WHAT” are what? Stupid, that’s what. A) Show respect and pay attention. B) Come up with something of your own.
Really good match from Rey VS Knight, but of course Dom distracts to cost Rey. But biggest of all from that segment, the moment fans have wanted for the last few weeks now: REY DECKS DOM! And now we’ll get Rey VS Dom, and Dom sold all the emotion after that perfectly. He was upset, but there was also the fear and realization that comes with seeing something he thought would never happen actually happening. His dad is gonna whoop him, because Dom will only have Priest by his side while Finn prepares for Edge and Rhea prepares for Charlotte. And Legado can make a heroic move by countering Priest so that Rey VS Dom has a fair finish.
Good promo from Profits, Braun & Ricochet to put some tension between those teams going into the men’s Fatal 4. Good tag match qualifier for the women’s Fatal 4, and it was good weaving of stories that Shotzi & Natty win. Shayna & Ronda get that “first round bye” right into the match, but it does work because all four Faces want payback on them. It might not even matter who the fourth team is (though I’m sure it’ll be a team from Raw), Ronda & Shayna are probably gonna tear into them all to win and essentially be #1 contenders to the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships.
And there was just so much great stuff in the Intercontinental Championship contract signing. Sheamus brought back the same stuff he said when he and McIntyre had their 1v1 feud last year but that makes sense, it is how people can be when they argue with friends and family. I feel like McIntyre was tempted to Steiner Math because this is a Triple Threat, and he knows he can beat Sheamus. Gunther was also great, and I love that “Butch” Dunne went right after Gunther over their NXT UK past. Gunther VS Dunne was great stuff to have just for the hell of it, but of course there was the usual misunderstanding shenanigans that helped Gunther win.
If Gunther somehow retains at Mania, can we have HHH get Trent Seven back in WWE so we can have British Strong Style VS Imperium for the Summer? There were fans in Vegas who remembered Dunne for being Dunne and not for being a sidekick, and all fans deserve to see that Dunne alongside Tyler Bate and Trent Seven.
My Score: 8.8/10
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