Mitchell’s AEW Dynamite Results & Report! (12/21/22)
Happy Holiday Bash!
It’s a Holly Jolly Dynamite!
As AEW prepares for the holidays, The Elite and Death Triangle prepare to go NO DISQUALIFICATIONS in their Trios Championships Best of 7 Series! Who will have a black ‘n’ blue Christmas this year?
- AEW World Trios Championships Best of 7, Match 5, No Disqualifications: Death Triangle VS The Elite; The Elite wins and the series is 3-2.
- Hook VS Exodus Prime; Hook wins.
- Jon Moxley VS Darius Martin; Moxley wins.
- FTR VS Austin & Colten Gunn; The Gunns win.
- AEW Women’s World Championship: Jamie Hayter w/ Britt Baker & Rebel VS Hikaru Shida; Hayter wins and retains the title.
PLAY BY PLAY
Ricky Starks is here!
Fans fire up for The Absolute, who is not the AEW World Champion after getting absolutely screwed! Starks gets the mic and fans rally for “RICKY! RICKY!” Starks says, “It would be really nice to be standing here as the new AEW Champion, but that’s not how things turned out cuz I lost.” Fans boo what happened, but Starks says that’s all on him. He should’ve known better. It sucks, but at least he lost like a man while MJF won like a coward. At least Starks can stand here “with respect and dignity, whereas Max, even though he’s still champion, doesn’t even have any of that. Including a pair of these.”
But Starks does want to point out that if he was that close to beating MJF the first time, just imagine how it’ll go the next time, because guess what? There will be a next time! Fans like the sound of that! Starks says that’s how this starts. This isn’t the end, just look at him! This is the start! If Starks has to work his way back up, then guess what? Line ’em up so Stroke Daddy can knock ’em down! At the end of the day, Starks will be the man around here! Why? Because he’s Absolute Ricky Starks! But wait! Here comes Chris Jericho! Fans sing Judas for The Wizard, but he also has the Jericho Appreciation Society’s Daniel Garcia & Sammy Guevara.
The JAS stands on stage as the song finishes up, and then Jericho has the mic. “Ricky, Ricky, Ricky. I’ve been watching you for a long time, Ricky Starks. A long time. And I saw you last week, and you’re right, you did come this close to winning the world championship.” But Starks isn’t the dollar store version of anyone, Starks is a million dollar talent! Fans cheer that, and Jericho guarantees that Starks will be a world champion some day. But… he’s just not quite ready yet. He doesn’t want Starks to be a flash in the pan. Jericho says after talking things over with Danny and Sammy, his close, personal confidants, they feel Starks has what it takes to be a big star in AEW.
All Starks needs is a little influence, a little advice, and a little Chris Jericho. Fans say “NO! NO!” and then “SAMMY SUCKS! SAMMY SUCKS!” Jericho says if the fans say Sammy sucks, then they say Jericho sucks! And the JAS doesn’t suck! They have talked it over, and they want Starks to join the JAS! Starks says, “Oh~ wow~! The almighty Chris Jericho gave me a compliment! I love it! Hey, it’s my turn. Y’know what I love about you, Chris? I like that fact that you know how to stay relevant. I like the fact that you constantly evolve. Hell, just a few months ago, you were coming here built like an air fryer!
“Now look at you! You’re lean, you’re mean, you’re shredded! You’re dressed like a single father on his fifth divorce! I love it, personally.” Fans cheer that but Garcia & Sammy don’t like it. Starks says that while the offer is very tempting to join the little boy band, he will say HELL NO he doesn’t wanna join the JAS! You think that Starks wants to be part of Club Vampire and have a leash around his neck? NO! Hell, just last week, Jericho lost to Action Andretti so his stock has dropped. And the J in JAS might as well stand for “Jobbers.” Jericho is stunned silent! Fans chant “JOBBERS! JOBBERS!” and that upsets the JAS.
Starks says those two little jazz holes, they haven’t done anything! Fans chant “JAZZ HOLES! JAZZ HOLES!” and Starks has a question. What has Chris done for Garcia since joining? He lost the ROH Pure Championship, aww~… And Sammy, honestly, Starks couldn’t care less about you. But hey! They’re not gonna suck the life outta Starks cuz he won’t let it happen! But if Jericho wants something to suck, guess what? Okay, hold on. Starks can understand Jericho’s appetite not being big enough for that tonight. But how about this? January 4th, new city, new AEW! Starks proposes this: Jericho VS Starks 1v1!
But wait, Jake Hager is sneaking in! Jericho says that was the wrong answer, Ricky. Rock Hard Hager CLOBBERS Starks from behind! Then the JAS mugs Starks 3v1! Jericho takes his time while his minions stomp away on Starks! They drag Starks up, but here comes ACTION ANDRETTI! Andretti slides in, ducks the bat and springboard CROSSBODIES! Hager rushes him but Action dumps him out! Action LARIATS Sammy, then Starks tosses Garcia! Fans fire up as Andretti hits a MOONSAULT on Jericho! The JAS retreat, is Action Andretti absolutely going to watch Starks’ back against the sports entertainers?
AEW World Trios Championships Best of 7, Match 5, No Disqualifications: Death Triangle VS The Elite!
The series stands at 3-1 in favor of The Bastard & The Lucha Brothers, but that’s because they used hammers every time! So this week, Kenny Omega says ANY weapon is allowed! What won’t we see these two teams use to win when this could all end tonight?
The introductions are made, Don Callis joins commentary, and The Elite attack! The bell rings, the brawl is on, and fans are thunderous! The Elite get the edge, they CLUB Death Triangle and reel them all in, but the Death Tringle fight free of the powerbombs to TRIPLE SUPERKICK! The Elite all fall out of the ring, fans fire up as Penta & Fenix shout, “CERO! MIEDO!” and then Death Triangle all builds speed! They TRIPLE TOPE CONJILO! Direct hit on Omega & The Bucks, and then Fenix puts Nick in the ring! Fans fire up as Fenix fires forearms on Nick. Fenix whips Nick corner to corner then runs in to clothesline!
Pac runs in to back elbow! Penta runs in but Nick dodges! Omega and Matt drag out Pac and Fenix, Nick clotheslines Penta in the corner! Matt runs in to clothesline, too! Omega runs in to back elbow! Nakazawa joins in to back elbow! No Disqualifications, remember? Brandon Cutler the cold spray elf joins in, too! Only for Alex Abrahantes to get in his way! Alex shouts, “CERO! MIEDO!” and he pie faces Cutler! Cutler SPRAYS Alex in the face! Cutler dabs, but then turns around into a SUPERKICK from Penta! That’s what he gets for dabbing! Er, spraying Alex! Matt SUPERKICKS Penta! Pac BOOTS Matt!
Nick SCREW HIGH KICKS Pac! Fenix MISSILE DROPKICKS Nick! Omega BULLDOGS Fenix! Fans fire up with Omega but Penta has a trash can! SMACK for Omega! Penta wags his finger, “CERO! MIEDO!” Fenix and Pac set Omega up with the can against the rear! Penta goes up the corner, FULL METAL QUE PASO! Mat returns but Fenix snapmares him to rain down elbows! Fans rally for “A E DUB!” but they also say they want tables! Death Triangle TRIPLE BASEMENT DROPKICK Matt! Pac BOOTS Nick on the apron but Nick pushes him back. Penta runs in but Nick dumps him out! Fenix runs out but Nick jumps over!
Pac runs in but Nick shoulders into him! Nick mule kicks Fenix, then SLINGSHOT FACEBUSTERS Pac, to CARTWHEEL MOONSAULT Fenix! But Penta SLINGBLADES Nick to the floor! Penta fire sup and so do the fans as the Holiday Bash goes picture in picture!
Death Triangle coordinates, Pac BOOTS Cutler then scares Nakazawa off. The Lucha Brothers bring out a TABLE! Pac stomps Omega around, then he brings out another table! Penta then brings a Christmas tree from the stage!? oh, it falls apart. AEW went for the cheap ones apparently. But the tables are set up at ringside and Penta puts the parts of a Christmas tree into the ring. Nick throws forearms but Pac hits back! Pac ROCKS Nick, Penta puts the tree back together in a corner. Matt crawls into the ring but Pac also throws Nick in. Alex fetches a chair for Penta and Penta wedges that in a corner.
Fenix fires off shots on Matt in the corner! Penta CHOPS Omega, Pac DECKS Nick! Pac kicks Nick, CLUBS Omega, then drags Matt up. Pac bumps Matt off buckles while Fenix KICKS Omega in a corner. Fenix coordinates with the others, but Omega fights back! Penta ROCKS Nick and then Pac joins Fenix. They double whip Omega into the Christmas tree! Omega writhes from pine needles in the back! The Lucha Brothers then double whip Nick into the Christmas tree! Nick tumbles up and out, then Fenix fixes the tree. Fenix goes back to help Penta with Matt, but the tree falls over! Aww… Penta sets the tree back up and fans cheer!
Fenix & Penta double whip Matt into the Christmas tree! They then whip Matt back the other way, but he slides under the chair! Nick is up top to CROSSBODY all the Death Triangle! Fans fire up as Nick waits on Pac to stand up. SHINING WIZARD in the corner! GAMANGIRI! Forearm! Nick runs at Penta, ducks the lariat to SUPERKICK! Fenix goes Matrix to duck the lariat but Nick SUPERKICKS him down! Nick aims at Pac but Pac moves, the SUPERKICK hits the chair! Nick’s bad leg just got worse! Pac twists the ankle, stomps the knee, and then he fetches the chair. Pac puts the chair around Nick’s foot!
Fans fire up as Pac aims while climbing the corner. Omega SMACKS Pac with the trash can! Matt fetches a fresh can, then he climbs up to ARIAHARA MOONSAULT onto the Lucha Brothers! Omega sets the can up on the corner, fireman’s carries Pac, “YOU! CAN’T! ESCAPE!” ROLLING SENTON! Omega goes up top, brings the can along with him, and MOONSAULTS with it onto Pac!! Fans fire up as Omega covers, TWO!! Fans boo, they thought that was it. Omega goes out to look under the ring, and he brings out a BARBED WIRE BROOM! Omega is going back to his Unsanctioned match with Jon Moxley!
Fans rally for the “CLEANER! CLEANER!” Fenix runs in, Omega SMACKS Fenix in the side with the broom! The barbed wires get stuck in the tights! Fenix yanks those free, but Omega SMACKS him on the back! Omega sets the broom down, runs, KOTORU KRUSHER on the broom! Fenix writhes, the Bucks come back, Penta runs in but is sent right out! Matt ROCKS Penta, then Nick throws out Pac! The Bucks fire hands and put Penta and Pac on tables! Fans rally up as the Bucks go to the corners! The Bucks climb, Omega reels Fenix in, Matt MACHO ELBOWS through the table on Penta! Nick SWANTON BOMBS through the table on Pac!
Omega double underhooks and lifts Fenix, JAY DRILLER on the barbed wire broom!! Omega clutches his own butt cuz the barbed wire got him, too! Omega gets that free, covers Fenix, TWO!?!? Fenix survives and no one can believe it! Omega moves the Christmas tree out of the way, he calls to the Bucks, and fans say, “This is Awesome!” The Bucks return, they drag Fenix up by his wrists, but Alex hooks Omega’s foot! The Bucks still B T E TRIGGER but Fenix ducks! The Bucks’ knees collide! Pac drags Matt out, Penta drags Nick out, and the Bucks are sent into railing! Pac GAMANGIRIS Omega, Fenix somersault- NO, Omega shoves Fenix away!
Omega V-TRIGGERS on the return! Omega drags Fenix up, Electric Chair Lifts, ONE WINGED- RANA from Fenix!! Cover, TWO!?!? Omega escapes at the last possible moment! But Alex tosses Fenix the hammer! Fenix is conflicted, but he shrugs. No Disqualifications, no real problem! HAMMER SHOT to Omega!! Cover, TWO!??!?! Omega survives and no one can believe it! But Pack wraps Omega up in the BRUTALIZER! Fenix adds on pipe cleaner tinsel like a garrote!! Omega endures, Fenix wheelbarrows Nick down into a KNEEBAR!! The Elite endure double submissions, but then Penta catches Matt!
Matt fights Penta off with fists! Fans fire up as Matt gets free and stomps away on Fenix! Then he stomps away on Pac! Pac holds on but Matt is right after that bade nose! Pac finally lets off, but the Lucha Brothers have DOS HAMMERS! Pac gets one, too! TRES HAMMERS!! Omega stands but the Bucks drag out Pac and Penta to RAM them into railing! SNAP DRAGON for Fenix! Matt drags Fenix up and around, Nick throws in a chair! Matt gut wrenches Fenix, Nick climbs the corner! FULL METAL MELTZER DRIVER!!! C0ver, THE ELITE WINS!!
Winners: The Elite, by pinfall (the series is now 3-2)
The Elite is still alive in the series! But wait! Pac and Penta CLOBBER everyone with those hammers! Fans boo and Cutler tries to save who he can but Penta hits him, too! Penta and Pac dig those hammers into the Bucks’ foreheads! Nick’s busted open! Penta goes after Omega, too! Pac keeps on Nick, even as the refs reprimand! Penta whiplashes Omega with the tinsel! Pac wears Nick’s blood like war paint! Matt defends Nick but Penta stomps him, too! Fenix has Penta stop, the damage is done. The Death Triangle still leads the series, will they finish this off with New Year’s Smash? Or will The Elite’s comeback not be stopped, even by this?
AEW shares footage from after last week’s episode went off the air.
MJF had made it backstage, running away from Bryan Danielson. MJF is furious! He called Bryan the “gutless coward!” That was MJF’s moment! That was MJF’s first title defense, and what does Bryan do? He tries to attack MJF from behind! “You gutless prick. You’re a nobody in my world, you understand me? I beat Ricky Starks CLEAN, smackdab in the middle of the ring! That should’ve been my moment, and you had to stick your sh*tty little hipster nose in it, didn’t you? You worthless, worthless, WORTHLESS scumbag! Everybody wants to ride my wave in this company. Everybody wants to eat off of MY plate!
“Well guess what, Bryan Danielson? when it comes to the reign of terror, you will eat less than you desire, and more than you deserve!” Maxwell Jacob Friedman, hypocrisy aside, is still AEW World Champion. What will he do to put the American Dragon in his place?
Backstage interview with Action Andretti.
Tony Schiavone is with the newest AEW signee, and he notes “What an upset last week on Dynamite over Chris Jericho, never seen anything like that!” And earlier tonight, Action helped Starks against the JAS. Action says yes, last week, HE did the unthinkable, the impossible, something that some people said is the biggest upset of the decade! Action defeated #THEOCHO in the middle of that ring! And ever since, his life hasn’t been the same! Action has been getting an overwhelming amount of support and love from the fans, and it feels amazing.
And while all that is good, Action knew that the JAS wouldn’t just watch their leader get beat by some rookie and not have some frustration and anger. They were going to take it out on whoever, wherever, and tonight, they went after Ricky Starks. Action was out there, he had Starks’ back! But then Angelo Parker & Matthew Menard walk in! Action is on guard but they tell him hold on! Take it easy! Cool it! They’re here to compliment him. He’s on a hot streak! Some would even say, he’s on FIRE! What? Action turns around, AND GETS A FIREBALL TO THE FACE!! The Wizard is back to his old tricks!
Jericho digs Action’s face into the ground! “You’re on fire, Andretti! You’re on fire!!” “Merry Christmas, kid!” The JAS is downright evil! Are they getting nothing but coal for Christmas this year?
Renee Paquette is in the ring.
And she tells San Antonio to please welcome the American Dragon, Bryan Danielson! Fans cheer as Bryan makes his way out to the ring. Renee says this is the first time that we’ve heard from Bryan since his mentor, William Regal, was brutally attacked by MJF. Her question is, where does this leave the Blackpool Combat Club? Bryan says that he doesn’t expect the BCC to forgive Regal, he’s done some pretty bad things. But the thing is, Bryan first trained to wrestle right here in San Antonio. Fans cheer that! Bryan says his very first match was 15 minutes up the road at a place called Far West Rodeo! Fans cheer that, too!
Bryan is sure the fans saw him do some really bad country line dancing, but his first trainers were Rudy Boy Gonzalez and Shawn Michaels. Fans cheer those names! “H B K! H B K!” But the man who turned Bryan into the wrestler he is today is William Regal. Not only did Regal make Bryan into the wrestler he is today, but he made Bryan into the person he is today. And Bryan understands Moxley, Claudio and Yuta don’t have this same relationship, but when Regal was in the hospital and Bryan thought he was never going to see him again, he cried. That man has made Bryan’s life better, his wrestling better, and everything better!
Renee and the fans all know how much Regal has meant to the wrestling industry. Fans cheer and do the “YES! YES! YES!” hands to agree. Bryan says then Regal comes to AEW, and Bryan loved having Regal here in AEW! One thing Regal taught Bryan is that “there are consequences to your actions. One thing MJF needs to learn is that there are consequences to your actions. Max, don’t think for a second that I haven’t been listening to every single word that you’ve said! There are consequences to your actions when you hospitalize somebody that I love more than anybody on this earth except for my family! There are consequences to those actions!
“You call me a coward?! MJF, get your ass out here, RIGHT NOW!!” But instead of MJF, it’s The Firm’s Ethan Page and Stokely Hathaway. Ethan wants everyone to hold on. Stokely, Ethan wants to get this right: Ethan Page makes it all the way to the finals of the AEW World Title Eliminator Tournament, right? Right. And Bryan didn’t. Right. Ethan Page makes it to the final two of the Dynamite Diamond Ring Battle Royal, but Bryan didn’t. Right. And everyone in this building knows that if Ethan faced MJF, Ethan would be here with the WORLD TITLE! Fans are shouting “S T F U!” but Ethan continues. For some odd reason, Vegetable Man here thinks he can just jump the line!
Stokely says that’s crazy! He thinks Bryan should go home, be a family man, shop at Trader Joe’s, get those pro-biotics, the gluten free goodies, and the cauliflower Cheetos, or whatever Bryan wants. Bryan wants them to hold on, he’s confused. He can’t concentrate because one, the glare coming off of Stokely’s head is distracting. Can Stokely grow some hair? There’s also the fans “very politely” telling them both to shut up. Bryan could not hear any of that. Did they insult him by calling him “Vegetable Man?” Stokely says, “You raggedy b*tch.”
Ethan has Stokely calm down, and he wants to make this very clear: He didn’t call Bryan “Vegetable Man” to insult his way of life and what he eats. Fans boo but Ethan and Stokely to shut up! Ethan says they can see who’s talking, right? SO SHUT UP! Listen, Bryan! Ethan didn’t say all that because of Bryan’s way of life. It’s because if he thinks he’s jumping ahead of Ethan Page, Ethan promises he will literally turn Bryan into a vegetable! Bryan tells San Antonio that Ethan Page just threatened him. If Ethan wants to turn Bryan into a vegetable, why doesn’t he try it right here, right now? Fans like the sound of that!
Stokely and Ethan talk, Ethan starts unbuttoning his shirt, but then he says he thought about it and to be honest… Fans boo but Ethan tells them to shut up so he can explain! Ethan can pop off the top, but the pants are staying on. So if Bryan wants to be turned into a vegetable, let’s do it next week. Fans boo more but Ethan says they can suck, he’s not working in San Antonio. See you next Wednesday, Bryan! A match is set for New Year’s Smash, and MJF is watching backstage with a smug grin on his face. Will All Ego send the American Dragon on a detour from going after MJF? Or will Ethan’s ego be deflated to end 2022?
Rampage has a HUGE Trios Match!
It will be the first ever “Three Kings of Christmas” Casino Trios Royale, for 300 THOUSAND DOLLARS!! The Dark Order, Kip Sabian’s Superbad Squad, Orange Cassidy & Best Friends, AR Fox & Top Flight, Ari Daivari & The Varsity Athletes, La Faccion Ingobernables, the newly formed Spanish Announce Project (Angelico, Serpentico & Luther), and the Blackpool Combat Club’s Moxley, Claudio & Yuta, are all competing for that prize, who will be raking it in for the holidays?
Jon Moxley speaks.
“The 300 thousand dollar Trios Casino Christmas Battle Royal this Friday night on Rampage. Well, that sounds like one heck of a good time, I wouldn’t wanna miss that. So I guess you know where I’ll be, again, Cowboy Hangman Page. We can keep this fight up for as long as you want. We can trade fists, brawl all over Texas if you want. We can keep going as long as you want, but I’m starting to wonder when exactly we’re gonna settle this in the ring. Or are we? But then again, what is there to settle? You got knocked out. What’d you think was gonna happen when you signed on for that match in Cincinnati? How’d you see that playing out in your head differently?
“I’m getting a little sick and tired of the somber tones. About the accident and the thing that wasn’t supposed to happen. Poor Hangman Page woke up in the hospital. What’d you think I was trying to do with that clothesline? Comb his hair? It ain’t my problem that you got a glass jaw, that just makes me good at my job. I ain’t the bad guy here. Don’t become one of those play wrestlers, Hangman, you’re better than that. This kid tonight, Darius, from Top Flight. Sure, very talented. Sure, high-flyer, jumping around and all that. Blew out his knee, got in a car wreck, blah blah blah. All I hear is ‘injury prone, injury prone.’
“So is that my fault? Is that my fault now, too? We are teachers. So I’m gonna have to teach this Darius a hard, hard lesson tonight on Dynamite.” Will the Maniac and one half of the Coldest Team in the Game burn it down here for the Holiday Bash?
Samoa Joe speaks.
“Hello, friends, Samoa Joe here. Your ROH Television Champion and Undisputed TNT Champion. Also universally known as The One True King of Television, taking a little bit of time out of my busy schedule to wish you all a happy holiday. And in particular, because of the spirit of comradery and friendship that comes with this season, Wardlow, I have a special greeting for you. I wish that you have the happiest, merriest of holidays. May it be filled with friends, family and people you love and enjoy. Because I think we both know you’re definitely not going to be having a Happy New Year.
“As a matter of fact, Santa may not bring you what you want on December 25th, but come December 28th, Wardlow, I’m gonna give you more than you ever asked for. And after I’m done giving you exactly what you asked for, Wardlow, I’m gonna take from you. Wardlow, have a happy, happy holiday season. But come December 28th, all the holiday cheer ends.” #TwoBeltJoe has given the Maestro of Mayhem a seven day warning, but will New Year’s Smash be the end of the King of TV’s reign?
Hook VS Exodus Prime!
The Cold Hearted Handsome Devil is still undefeated at 16-0 and still the FTW Champion, but he also came to the rescue of “Jungle Boy” Jack Perry against The Firm’s Moriarty & Morrissey. Will The Immaculate Exodus recover from his beating at the hands of Wardlow? Or will he wish they didn’t #SendHook?
The bell rings, the two circle, and they tie up. Hook waistlocks, SLAMS Exodus down, then floats to a facelock. Hook puts Prime in a corner, fires off body shots, then ROCKS him with a haymaker! Fans fire up but Prime swings on Hook! Into a SAYANAGI! Hook storms up, blocks a boot, and then clinches Prime in a high cradle, for a T-BONE! Prime staggers up, into a LARIAT! Fans fire up and Hook paces around. Hook gives Prime crossface forearms, then hooks on the REDRUM! Prime taps, Hook wins!
Winner: Hook, by submission
But just as fans cheer for Hook’s win, The Firm is on the tron! Stokely says, “Well, well, well. Look what we have here.” Moriarty & Morrissey are mugging Jungle Boy! “This Neanderthal thought he was walking around in Beverly Hills. But Hook, just like you, he can’t walk these streets alone. And Hook, trust me when I saw we sympathize, because of two reasons: Lee Moriarty, and diabetes. Stokely pours out a bag of chips just to add insult to injury, as Morrisey drags JB up to CHOKE SLAM him into a dumpster! Moriarty dumps trash onto JB, but Hook storms his way to the back! Will Hook find where The Firm is in time to help JB out of a jam?
Jon Moxley w/ Claudio Castagnoli VS Darius Martin w/ Dante Martin!
The Maniac keeps this show moving as he makes his entrance, with Claudio by his side! Class is in session with the Blackpool Combat Club, will the #AirWolf pass with flying colors?
The bell rings and the fans rally up. Moxley and Darius stare down, then they circle. They tie up, Moxley pushes Darius to a corner, Darius turns it around, but Moxley turns it back around. They both shove and fans like that. The two tie up again, Moxley waistlocks and full nelsons to then spin, snapmare and KICK Darius in the back. Fans rally as Darius gest up. Dante coaches his brother, Moxley asks Claudio what’s up, and Moxley ties up with Darius again. Moxley headlocks, Darius endures the grind, and Darius pries at the hold. Fans rally, Darius wrenches to a wristlock to then get a headlock. Moxley powers out and they RAM shoulders!
Neither man falls, and Moxley dares Darius to try again. Darius runs, they RAM shoulders again, and Moxley SLAPS Darius! Darius scowls, Moxley runs but into a sweep! Darius waistlocks, Moxley switches but Darius resists the lift to switch back. Moxley elbows free, runs, but Darius drops to DROPKICK! Fans fire up as Moxley bails out to regroup with Claudio. They talk and Moxley goes back to the ring. Moxley and Darius knuckle lock, then Moxley kicks low! Moxley throws Darius out hard, then goes out after him. Moxley drags Darius up to TOSS him into the railing! Moxley pushes the railing apart to bring Darius to the crowd!
Fans fire up as Moxley snap suplexes Darius to the bare concrete! Moxley leaves Darius behind and fans fire up more. Moxley high fives with Claudio, Dante checks on his brother, but Moxley pushes Dante aside to fetch Darius. Darius throws forearms on Moxley! Moxley ROCKS Darius back! Moxley smacks Darius off the apron, then RAMS him into railing! Moxley puts Darius in the ring, tells Dante to watch himself, but Darius DIVES out onto Moxley! Fans fire up as Darius rains down fists! Dante and Claudio stare down, keeping the other in check, as Darius refreshes the ring count. Moxley gets up and Darius puts him in the ring.
Darius climbs the corner, Dante cheers him on, but Moxley DECKS Darius to the floor! Claudio stays back and Dante coaches his brother back up. Moxley holds the ropes open for Darius while the ring count reaches 5 of 10. Darius goes under at 7 of 10, so Moxley drags him up. Moxley hits an X-PLEX! Darius writhes but Moxley gets the legs to turn him over. Moxley ties up the legs, twists an ankle, but Darius endures. Moxley grabs an arm to keep Darius back, but fans rally up. Moxley isolates an arm to STOMP it! Darius crawls to a corner, but Moxley stands him up to CHOP him! And CHOP him again! And CHOP again!
Moxley eggs Darius on, so Darius CHOPS back! Moxley HEADBUTTS Darius, puts him up top, then climbs up after him. Moxley claws Darius’ back! Moxley brings Darius up for a SUPERPLEX! Moxley crawls over, but he sits Darius up for HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! Moxley stops at 5, to then drag Darius up and suplex! Darius slips out to CHOP! Moxley ROCKS Darius! Darius ROCKS Moxley, but Moxley ROCKS Darius! Fans rally up as Darius UPPERCUTS, but Moxley fires off forearm after forearm! Moxley HEADBUTTS, Darius CHOPS, ROLLING ELBOWS, and UPPERCUTS again!
Darius fires up but Moxley kicks a leg out! Moxley trips Darius, toys with Darius’ bad leg, and he pulls at the brace! Darius kicks Moxley’s leg out and Moxley’s face hits off the knee! Darius goes to the corner, fans fire up and Darius ELBOWS Moxley from the corner! Darius goes up to PELE! Moxley is down, Darius covers, TWO! Darius is a bit surprised, but he’s busted Moxley open! Moxley swings but Darius uppercuts and forearms in return! Darius whips, Moxley reverses but Darius CLOBBERS Moxley! And again! Darius runs corner to corner to UPPERCUT! Darius whips, Moxley reverses but Darius slides to go outside!
Moxley storms over but Darius shoulders into him! Darius steps in and springboards, but Moxley still whips him out to the other side. Darius steps in again, COMPLETE SHOT! Cover, TWO! Moxley survives but Darius keeps his focus. Moxley crawls while Darius climbs up the corner. Fans fire up, Darius leaps back in, CROSSBODY! But Moxley rolls it through to DRAGON STOMP! Darius is a ragdoll but Moxley keeps going! Moxley then wraps Darius up for HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! Moxley stops at “OCHO!” and then he wraps on a SLEEPER! Darius endures, fights, and fans rally up!
Darius fights to his feet, but Moxley reels him in! DEATH RIDER!! Cover, Moxley wins!
Winner: Jon Moxley, by pinfall
Darius showed some toughness, but not enough to overcome Moxley! Will the $300,000 Casino Trios Royal be a different story?
AEW hears from Hikaru Shida and Jamie Hayter.
The Full Metal Samurai promises to take back the AEW Women’s World Championship and show us why she has the strongest heart in AEW. But Hayter says, “Oh, isn’t that lovely? Strong heart~! Every single person in that arena is gonna be buzzing when inevitably, Jamie Hayter retains the AEW Women’s World Championship.” That match is our main event, who will bring the title home for the holidays?
AEW has another chapter from The Book of Hobbs.
The Powerhouse is working out as he says, “My first memory, at three years old, was watching my uncle overdose on the floor. Have you ever seen someone gargle and choke on their own blood? Have you ever smelt your own burning flesh? As a child, I was beaten, I was robbed, I’ve been stabbed, I’ve been shot. But what type of people would do this to a child? Monsters. But what they didn’t know is that they created a monster themselves. And now it’s time that I spill everyone else’s blood and turn to the next chapter of The Book of Hobbs.” With all that he has seen, and with all that he has endured, will AEW be able to endure what they’re about to see?
FTR VS Austin & Colten Gunn!
Cash Wheeler & Dax Harwood have been stalked by and trolled by “The Ass Boys” for the better part of this year, and have finally had enough! Will the still AAA & IWGP Tag Team Champions be able to put Austin & Colten in their place once and for all? Or will the Gunns add insult to injury to the already beat up FTR?
The teams sort out and Dax starts against Colten. They tie up, go around, and Colten gets around to CLUB Dax! Dax drops to his knee, but he stands back up to CHOP Colten! Colten staggers, Austin jumps in, but so does Cash! The teams stand off then back down. Dax tags Cash, fans taunt the “ASS~ BOYS~!” but Colten tells them to shut up. Colten and Cash tie up, Cash gets around and he CLUBS Colten! And CLUBS him again! And hits a BIG atomic drop! And then another atomic drop! Cash whips Colten to CLOBBER him! Colten bails, Austin runs in, but Austin gets an atomic drop! And then a Manhattan drop!
Cash CHOPS then UPPERCUTS and Austin goes down! Colten returns to kick Cash low! Colten whips, Cash holds ropes to avoid the dropkick! Cash literally kicks Colten’s ass! Cash whips Colten into Austin, giving Austin a hip attack! Then Cash whips Colten back in for another hip attack! And then another! Austin can’t get away but Cash back drops Colten! Dax runs in, FTR clothesline the Gunns out of the ring! Dax goes out to fire off on Austin while Cash kicks Colten’s ass around, and again literally! Cash drags Colten up to CHOP him! And UPPERCUT him! Fans fire up while AEW goes picture in picture.
Cash whips Colten hard into railing! Dax smacks Austin off railing on the other side, and gets a hug from his daughter in the first row. Cash RAMS Colten into more railing while Dax CHOPS Austin down! The Gunns flounder about, but then Dax smacks Austin off the timekeeper’s table! Colten turns things around on Cash to smack him off the apron! Colten puts Cash in, storms up on him, but Cash JABS away on Colten! Cash then DECKS Colten with a haymaker! Cash stomps a mudhole into Colten at the corner, but Austin rushes in from the apron! Cash ducks the sucker punch to DECK Austin! But Cash turns around into a DROPKICK from Colten!
Colten drags Cash around to rain down forearms, then he drags Cash over. Tag to Austin and the Gunns hand off Cash. Austin bumps Cash off buckles, follows him as he flounders, but the ref reprimands. Austin argues with the ref, shouts at Dax, then goes back to Cash. Austin reels Cash in, Cash flops down, so Austin CLUBS him. Austin drags Cash up again, turns him around and drags him down into a chinlock! Cash flails while he endures the grind and fans rally up. Cash fights up but Austin wrangles him back down! Cash fights his way back up, throws body shots, but Austin ROCKS him with a forearm!
Austin wraps the chinlock back on and he leans on Cash with all his weight. Cash still fights his way up as the Holiday Bash returns to single picture. Cash reaches out but Austin throws body shots! Austin hops on as a backpack, but Cash runs to RAM Austin face-first into buckles! Austin flounders away, he and Cash crawl, hot tag to Colten! Colten keeps Cash from Dax, whips him to a corner, but Cash dodges! Colten hits buckles and falls down! Fans fire up as Cash and Colten crawl for their corners, hot tags to Austin and Dax! Fans fire up more as Dax JABS away then DECKS Austin! Then DECKS him again!
Dax DECKS Colten, whips Austin to a corner and clotheslines! Dax CHOPS, UPPERCUTS, repeat! Colten rushes over and CLUBS Dax! Colten whips, Dax reverses to wrench and short arm LARIAT! Austin runs into a Manhattan Drop! Dax trips Austin, has the legs, and fans fire up as he steps through! But Colten trips Dax up! The ref reprimands and fans boo but Colten smacks Dax off the apron! Austin sets up on the steps and Colten reels Dax in! Fans taunt the “ASS~ BOYS!” and Dax resists the lift! Cash DIVES into Colten!! Austin rushes over to RAM Cash into railing! Austin swings on Dax but Dax ducks! Only for Austin to SHOVE Dax into steel steps, butt first!
Dax clutches his “broken ass bone” while fans boo. Austin puts Dax in the ring, and then aims from the corner. Austin tunes up the band and fans boo. He’s no Heartbreak Kid! Austin rushes up, but stops short of Sweet Chin Music to say, “SUCK IT!” He then trips Dax to step through and steal the SHARPSHOOTER!! Dax endures but Cash CLOBBERS Austin! Colten swings but misses, Cash fires off haymakers! Cash TOSSES Colten out hard! Fans fire up as Cash tells the Ass Boyd to get up! Cash leaps, but Colten moves! Cash crashes into railing! Austin drags Dax up to kick low and run, but no Famouser!
Dax kicks low and reels Austin in, but the bad hip won’t let him lift! Fans rally for Dax as he drags himself back up. Austin swings but Dax ducks to ROCK him right back! Dax waistlocks to O’Conner Roll, TWO!! Austin has it, with Colten holding him in place!! THE GUNNS WIN!!
Winners: Austin & Colten Gunn, by pinfall
The Ass Boys just stole one from FTR! That’s a three-match losing streak! The Gunns claim they’ll kill the legacy of the greatest tag team of our time, will they do it by any means necessary?
AEW hears from Jay Lethal, Jeff Jarrett, Sonjay Dutt & Satnam Singh.
Wait, are they doing a rap video to mock The Acclaimed? Yes, they are. MC Sonjay raps “Acclaimed is just a bunch of slap nuts. Last week, Slap Max got smacked up. Caster couldn’t do his rap, that’s bad luck. And by the way, you’re raps SUCK! Bowens tried to fight but he wasn’t able, cuz Jay Lethal threw his ass right over a table. We’ll make Acclaimed run from the building, cuz we got Satnam Singh and he’s one in a billion! ‘Grand Daddy Ass,’ get him Depends, we’ll get the tag titles and they’ll never scissor again! HAHAHAHA! This Friday night on Rampage, Bowens and Billy Daddy Ass step up to the plate against my best friend in the whole world, Jay Lethal, and Jeff Jarrett!”
So then, will the #LethalOutlaws deliver a smash hit that gets them a shot at the AEW World Tag Team Championships? Or will their new track fail to go gold?
Tony Schiavone and Rick Ross are in the ring.
Fans cheer as Schiavone introduces The Biggest Boss as he plans to mediate this coming face-to-face. First out, the Limitless One, Keith Lee! Fans cheer to see Texas’ own, and Rick Ross wants them to make some noise for the big homey! Rick Ross wants to make this clear, he IS the Biggest Boss, and when the Biggest Boss comes out, he comes to make history. Today, we make history! This is big business they gotta discuss so they’re gonna make this clear. “Time to bring out the young legend. Y’all make some noise for SWERVE!” The music doesn’t hit, Rick Ross says they’ll make this special. Also, Keith’s one big mother effer.
Rick Ross says we’re here to make history! Fans chant for “Whose House?” “Swerve’s House!” Rick Ross says to give the legend some time. We’re ready, but then Swerve says, “Yo, yo, I’m sorry. I wasn’t aware we was doing this on Keith Lee’s time again.” Swerve comes out without music and fans boo. Swerve says we’re here again, doing things based off Keith. Swerve doesn’t wait for nobody. Swerve does things Swerve’s way. Keith, Swerve really tried. He wanted to give Keith the world! They should own everything! Rick Ross agrees. Swerve tells Rick Ross that he can’t deal with all these accusations. Rick Ross says they do not deal with accusations! And definitely not false ones.
Swerve tells Keith that he needs to keep his eye on the ball. But he can’t keep his eyes on the tag titles, or on his health, and honestly, he needs to keep eyes on the back of his head. What? Rick Ross is behind Keith, and he says the young legend has spoken. PARKER BOUDREAUX is here!? Parker CLUBS Keith, then turns him around to ROCK him with haymakers! Swerve grins as Parker goes wild on Swerve! Parker roars, fans boo, but Parker whips Keith. Keith reverses to lariat Parker out of the ring! Rick Ross is shocked, but Swerve eggs Keith on. Rick Ross says Swerve is an icon. Keith tells Rick Ross to shut up!
Keith goes out after Swerve, but Parker is back up! And then someone else RAMS Keith into railing! Who is that?! He’s stomping away on Keith! This man, covered in tattoos, roars and then stomps Keith! Rick Ross says this is the history that’s being made. Mogul Affiliates is a new faction, and Parker SMACKS Keith on the back with a chair! Keith drops to his knees! Parker and the tattoo man drag Keith up, RAM him against the apron, and then bring the steel steps over! Rick Ross keeps saying this is them making history, and the Affiliates put Keith on the steel steps! Swerve climbs the corner!? They even add a cinderblock!?
Swerve jumps, SUPER KILL STOMPS with the cinderblock and steel steps!! Keith goes down in a heap and Rick Ross is amazed! “He made need attention.” Fans lose their minds but “Whose House?” “SWERVE’S HOUSE!” Will Mogul Affiliates make 2023 the Year of Swerve?
AEW hears from the trios entering the Three Kings Christmas Casino Trios Royale.
Best Friends says $300,000, that could get Mama Beretta a new house. Chuck Taylor wants to get his mom a chainsaw! Cassidy will also buy Trent’s mom a new house. The Dark Order want to split the $300,000 evenly between Uno, Silver, Reynolds, Negative One and… Oh, that’s all. Sorry, Hangman. But can he promise not to get involved? Yeah, he won’t. Why would he? Well because of Mo- MONEY! He loves the money, and battle royals. Well, and Moxley. This is Friday. Oh, alright, he’ll see them later. O-Okay. Is Hangman going on vacation already? Or will he just wait until it’s all said and done to get what he wants for Christmas?
AEW Women’s World Championship: Jamie Hayter w/ Britt Baker & Rebel VS Hikaru Shida!
The first defense for Hayter’s title reign is a big one! She is facing a former AEW Women’s World Champion, the current Regina di Wave Champion, and a very determined warrior! Will Shida take this title back after being without it for over a year? Or will she find that #HayterHitsHard?
The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see if Hayter’s gonna hate the holidays!
The bell rings and fans rally for “JAMIE HAYTER!” already. Hayter swings, Shida dodges to kick and fire off forearms! Shida whips, Hayter blocks to ROCK Shida back with forearms! Hayter whips, runs Shida over, but Shida kips up to ROCK Hayter! Hayter staggers, elbows back, then puts Shida on ropes to CHOP and CHOP and CHOP! The ref counts, Hayter lets off, but Shida turns it around to fire forearm after forearm in return! Hayter turns it back around to CHOP and CHOP and CHOP! Shida turns it around to forearm and forearm and forearm! The ref counts, Shida lets off but runs to KNEE Hayter down!
Fans rally, Shida stomps Hayter to a corner, then Shida storms up to stomp Hayter more. The ref reprimands and counts but Shida digs her knee in. Shida lets off, Britt and Rebel protest, but Shida storms up again. Hayter hits low, CLUBS Shida on the back over and over, but Shida ROCKS Hayter! Shida reels Hayter in to scoop and SLAM! Fans fire up as Shida rains down fists! Hayter guards, Shida keeps hammering away, but the ref reprimands the hair pulling. Shida lets off but she drags Hayter up again. Fans rally and duel, Shida brings Hayter around to snap suplex into buckles! Hayter slumps down and fans fire up!
Shida scowls while Britt and Rebel are worried. Shida drags Hayter to the apron, turns her around, and CLUBS away! Shida gets space, runs in, and KNEE LIFTS Hayter right down! Fans fire up and Shida fires up, too, as AEW goes picture in picture.
Shida drags Hayter up and puts her back in the ring. Hayter staggers away but Shida storms up to her in the corner. Shida whips corner to corner, runs in, and she KNEES Hayter again! Shida whips corner to corner the other way, runs in, but Hayter FLAPJACKS her off the buckles! Shida is dazed, Hayter fires up and fixes her ponytail! Hayter stomps a mudhole into Shida but lets off as the ref counts. Hayter drags Shida up, Shida throws body shots but Hayter CLUBS her down. Hayter drags Shida up, and she snap suplexes Shida into buckles! Hayter fixes her hair again while Shida slumps down.
Hayter drags Shida out of the ring and drops her on the floor. Britt argues with the ref but Hayter drags Shida up to whip hard into the steel steps! Britt and Rebel mock Shida’s pain while Hayter kisses the AEW Women’s title. Hayter brings Shida up to run her around the way and send her hard into the railing! Shida slumps down but fans rally up as Hayter does lunges. Hayter refreshes the ring count while Shida drags herself from the railing. Hayter drags Shida up to whip her hard into more railing! Hayter takes a seat to catch her breath, but then she kicks and stomps Shida! The Holiday Bash returns to single picture as Rebel cheers Hayter on.
Hayter drags Shida up, puts her in the ring, and the fans count “OCHO!” Hayter drags Shida up, Shida throws a forearm! Hayter throws a forearm back! Fans rally and duel as the forearms go back and forth! Shida gets the edge, but Hayter ROCKS Shida then RAMS her into buckles! Hayter brings Shida up, and hits a SNAP JACKHAMMER! Cover, TWO!! Shida survives but Hayter drags her back up. Hayter ROCKS Shida, fires off more forearms, then whips her to ropes. Shida comes back, DOUBLE LARIATS wipe them both out! Fans fire up while Britt freaks out! A standing count starts, and we’re at 5 of 10 while both women are down.
Shida and Hayter sit up at “OCHO!” and stand at nine! The forearms start flying again! Shida ROCKS Hayter but Hayter ROCKS Shida! Shida ROCKS Hayter, fires off a flurry, but Hayter swings again! Shida blocks it! Shida ROCKS Hayter again and again, and again! Shida whips to DROPKICK Hayter down! Fans fire up with Shida and Hayter flounders to a corner! Shida climbs up to rain down fists! Shida goes all the way to “OCHO!” then TEN! Fans roar with Shida as she kicks Hayter away. Shida adjusts, to MISSILE DROPKICK! Hayter flounders away to the apron but Shida drags her up against the ropes.
Shida bumps Hayter off buckles, climbs up, then drags Hayter up the corner! Hayter fights back with body shots, then snapmares Shida to the apron! Shida hits hard but she manages to stay on the apron, so Hayter kicks her around. Hayter drags Shida up but Shida holds ropes to resist the German Suplex! Hayter CLUBS away on Shida, pushes her to the corner, but Shida stops herself! Shida elbows Hayter, POSTS her, then KNEES her! Shida reels Hayter in, to suplex her to the floor!! Fans are thunderous while AEW goes back to picture in picture!
Shida and Hayter writhe, Britt coaches Hayter up while the ref checks them both. Hayter and Shida are okay to continue, but Shida does clutch a shoulder. Shida and Hayter sit up slowly, the ring count is 5 of 10! Shida flounders her way over, Rebel helps Hayter up, Shida is in at 7! But Hayter is in at 9.9!! Shida roars and she drags Hayter around. Shida throws a forearm, but Hayter gives it back! Shida throws another forearm, Hayter falls over, but Hayter sits back up. Hayter throws a forearm but Shida hits back! Hayter CLUBS away on Shida, ROCKS her again and again, but Shida ENZIGURIS Hayter! Shida runs, into a BOOT!
Hayter staggers, runs, but Shida KNEES her down! Shida hurries to cover, TWO!! Hayter survives but Shida just goes up top! DIVING METEORA!! And then a FALCON ARROW!! Cover, TWO!!! Hayter survives and Shida can’t believe it! Shida hurries to put Hayter up top, then climbs up after her. Hayter resists the superplex, throws body shots and CLUBS Shida on the back! Hayter HEADBUTTS Shida, but Shida holds onto the ropes! Hayter turns things around as the Holiday Bash returns to single picture again, SUPER GOURD BUSTER! Shida is dazed, Britt shouts at Hayter to finish this, and Hayter adjusts. MOONSAULT FLOPS as Shida moves!
Shida runs, to TAMASHI!! Cover, TWO!?!? Hayter survives and the fans can’t believe it! But Shida just fires up more! Fans are thunderous, but Hayter flops over! Shida drags Hayter up, but Hayter is fighting it! Fireman’s carry, USHIGOROSHI outta nowhere!! Hayter runs, SLIDING LARIAT!! Cover, TWO!?!? Shida survives and fans can’t believe it! But they do know “This is Awesome!” Hayter drags Shida up but Shida fights the clinch! Shida runs, but Hayter gets her for the HATE BREAKER!! Cover, TWO!!!! Shida survives that urenage backbreaker, but Hayter just scowls as she fixes her hair again.
Hayter kisses her bicep, she drags Shida back up, ripcord and HAY- NO, Shida KNEES Hayter first! Then QUESTION MARK KICKS! Hayter wobbles, into an AX KICK!! KATA- NO, Hayter drops to avoid it! Hayter waistlocks and ripcords, but Shida ducks the lariat to waistlock and GERMAN SUPLEX! Britt grabs Shida’s kendo stick! Rebel distracts the ref while Britt calls out Shida! Shida storms over, she drags Britt into the ring! Shida ROCKS Britt, then goes up the corner, VENUS SHOOT! Britt flounders away, Shida has her kendo stick! Shida SMACKS Britt!! Shida then aims at Hayter, runs in at the corner, VENUS-
NO! Hayter catches Shida in position! Shida RANAS free, but Hayter rolls it through! High stack, TWO, into a deadlift!! POWERBOMB!! Cover, TWO?!?!? Shida survives and the fans are electric! Hayter is furious, she drags Shida up and runs, to CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL!! Cover, TWO!??!? Shida still survives but Hayter ain’t done! Ripcord, HAYTERADE!! Cover, Hayter wins!!
Winner: Jamie Hayter, by pinfall (still AEW Women’s World Champion)
As Taz says on commentary, “What a frickin’ battle” for just Hayter’s first defense! But of course, Britt goes after Shida for herself! She and Rebel stomp away on Shida, but here comes TONI STORM!! The Lightning From Down Under rushes out, and she DECKS Rebel! And she hits a THESZ PRESS on Britt!! Storm rains down fists on Britt, but Hayter BELT SHOTS Storm in the back!! Fans boo but Rebel and Britt drag Storm around. Hayter has the belt again, gives it a kiss, but here comes SARAYA!
The Revolution rushes to the ring, she CLOBBERS Rebel! She dodges Britt to SUPERKICK! Britt and her pals bail out, but we know a battle is coming in January! Will Saraya have plenty of choices for a tag partner to take on The Pillar & The Killer?
A great episode for AEW, though they didn’t go quite as hard on the holiday party theme as I thought they would. They had the trees on stage, there was a menorah on commentary desk, and MJF was wearing a Hanukkah suit, but no one was having a party or doing gift exchanges. I did appreciate the No Disqualification Trios match bringing a tree to the ring to use, though. The trios match made an awesome opener, and of course the hammers were involved, but I figured The Elite were gonna win this one. To be fair, I already said The Elite will push this to the seventh match, so the Falls Count Anywhere match is going to be wild and go The Elite’s way.
Great opening promo from Starks with the Jericho Appreciation Society. That is a great new feud, and I should’ve known Jericho would get his revenge on Action Andretti. That fireball will take Action out of action for a bit (no pun intended), so I guess no tag match of Starks and Andretti against like Menard & Parker or even Sammy & Garcia. But either way, Starks against any number of those guys is going to be great stuff, and Jericho VS Starks is going to be awesome whenever and wherever it happens.
Good promo from MJF, rife with hypocrisy fitting of a Heel like him, and great response from Bryan. But of course Ethan & Stokely respond instead of MJF, and Ethan VS Bryan is going to be great stuff. Hook of course won, but of course Moriarty & Morrissey mugged Jungle Boy when he was alone. #JungleHook VS Moriarty & Morrissey will surely happen but it still seems like they’re giving Hook too much credit if “Big Bill” Morrissey is avoiding him. Good promo from Samoa Joe to call out Wardlow, and their match at New Year’s Smash will be great stuff. Also, really powerful promo from Will Hobbs, he better take that TNT title off whoever has it after next week.
The money prize aside, as it’ll be kayfabe, a Casino Trios Royale is a great idea and I wish I’d come up with something like that myself. I have no idea who will win it, but maybe it shouldn’t be The Blackpool Combat Club. Claudio has a title, Yuta has a title, Moxley has a feud with Hangman, so maybe The Dark Order should get that just so they can use it to make up for the losses they’ve been suffering. Moxley had a great promo to hype up things with Hangman, and he had a great match with Darius. Moxley is oddly helping get the younger guys over with the fans by beating the hell out of them. Moxley wins, he will surely brawl with Hangman again, and then we get the announcement for like, Unsanctioned Match, Moxley VS Hangman, for a big 2023 Dynamite.
Great match out of FTR VS Gunns, but I should’ve figured Gunns were gonna cheat. This extends the feud, of course, but with the IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Champions already booked for WrestleKingdom 17 on January 4th, maybe they figure out something for the AAA World Tag Team Championships. And then FTR can get their win back and throw the Ass Boys away. The “rap” from Sonjay Dutt was at least delivered smoothly, and it was goofy on purpose. But point is, we’re getting a tag match where Billy Gunn steps up, and I would think Team Double Jay cheats to even get that win and claim they’re going to face The Acclaimed for the titles at some point.
The “face to face” of Swerve and Keith that turned into an ambush from a new faction was… mostly just slow and clunky. I suppose Swerve doing things on his time was their way of allowing Parker and the completely unnamed, completely tattooed monster of a guy to get into position, but that was all just the most awkward ambush I’ve ever seen. So I guess Rick Ross was right, they did make history. At least they punctuated it with a great cinderblock stomp. Mogul Affiliates is here, I guess Parker is ditching The Trustbusters, and I hope Swerve can help Parker finally figure out how to do things as more than a caveman with a crewcut.
And while we still only got one women’s match, that was the best women’s match AEW has given us on TV. Hayter and Shida could have even had this match on PPV, but of course Hayter wins. Storm and Saraya coming out to make the save made sense, and it further leads me to think Storm and Saraya are facing Britt & Hayter on January 4th. At the same time, they could easily upgrade things to a Six Woman Tag and have Rebel in it so Saraya doesn’t have to choose and she can bring Storm AND Shida. But then Rebel would be the obvious loser for the Heels, so that won’t happen. Storm & Saraya will surely win, and we get rematches from Full Gear for Revolution.
My Score: 8.9/10
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Mitchell’s AEW Dynamite Results & Report! (3/22/23)
Independence is Dynamite!
Dream matches, grudge matches, title matches, oh my!
The AEW World Tag Team Championships, Moxley VS Grayson, Hook VS Stokely under NO DISQUALIFICATIONS, and Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo, all on one night!
- Six Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Darby Allin & Sting VS The Superbad Squad; Cassidy, Darby & Sting win.
- AEW World Tag Team Championships: The Gunns VS Top Flight; The Gunns win and retain the titles.
- No Disqualifications: Hook VS Stokely Hathaway; Hook wins.
- Jon Moxley w/ Wheeler Yuta & Claudio Castagnoli VS Stu Grayson w/ The Dark Order; Moxley wins.
- Toni Storm w/ The Outcasts VS Skye Blue; Storm wins.
- Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo; Omega wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
There’s a medical emergency backstage!
Hangman Page is on the phone with someone while Brandon Cutler gets in the ambulance. Cutler tells Hangman to make sure someone’s with Nick, meaning MATT Jackson is in the ambulance! The ambulance drives away, and now Nick is loaded into a second! The Young Bucks were attacked before cameras were rolling, Don Callis calms Kenny Omega down, and Hangman rides with Nick. Omega has his main event match with AAA rival El Hijo del Vikingo, but who went after his best friends?
Six Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Darby Allin & Sting VS The Superbad Squad!
Freshly Squeezed is still a champion, as he retained the now AEW International Championship in Canada. But now, a familiar foe is rearing his Superbad head once again. Kip Sabian is bringing Butcher & Blade with him to go after Cassidy while his Best Friends are down and out. But will Cassidy’s new pals be more than enough to turn back the Superbad Squad?
The trios sort out and Cassidy starts against Kip. Fans rally and chant for “FRESHLY SQUEEZED!” but Kip copies Cassidy putting his hands up. Cassidy rushes in, Kip gets around and waistlocks to headlock. Cassidy powers out, headlocks back, but Kip powers out, only for Cassidy to slip around and headlock again. Kip powers out, things speed up and Cassidy arm-drags, but Kip cartwheels through! Kip mocks Cassidy, Cassidy rushes in but Kip dumps him out. Kip fakes Cassidy out with an Arabian Press, then he mocks putting his hands up again. Cassidy rushes back in, dodges Kip now, and sends him out!
Cassidy mocks Kip, then puts his hands up. To put his hands in his pockets! Kip rushes in, Cassidy dodges and SHOTGUNS! Cassidy kips up and fans fire up, but Kip scrambles away to tag in Butcher. Butcher eggs Cassidy on, but fans cheer as Cassidy tags in STIIIING! The Icon steps to Andy Williams and Andy talks trash. Butcher swings a forearm, but Sting just brushes it off! Butcher throws another forearm, but then Sting counter punches! And back hands! And punches again! Sting kicks low, ROCKS Butcher, then fires off in the corner. But Butcher claws at the eyes! The fans boo but Butcher BITES Sting’s forehead!
Butcher BLASTS Cassidy and Darby, then mocks Sting’s howl. Butcher runs, but misses the splash! Sting runs to hit the STINGER SPLASH! Fans fire up as Sting snapmares and gets the legs! But Blade and Kip attack! Fans boo but Darby and Cassidy fight them off! Kip throws Cassidy out, Blade scoops and dumps Darby out, then the Superbad Squad coordinates. Butcher & Blade reel Sting in, Butcher tags Kip, and then they DOUBLE SUPLEX Sting! Kip goes up the corner, but Sting slow rolls away, a la Cassidy! Speaking of Cassidy, he and Darby go after Butcher & Blade on the outside! Fans fire up but Kip is frustrated.
Kip storms over to another corner and climbs up again, but Sting slow rolls the other way! Fans fire up, Darby reaches out and makes the tag! Kip leaps, Darby gets under to SLAP, HEADBUTT, roll and CODE RED! Cover, TWO! Kip is still in this and Penelope Ford gets on the apron! The ref reprimands her while Darby whips Kip. Kip reverses, Darby goes up the ropes, but Blade trips him up! Darby hits the mat hard, Kip stomps away, and fans boo while AEW goes picture in picture.
Kip drags Darby up while Butcher sends Cassidy into barriers! Kip hits a FISHERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO! Tag to Blade, the squad mugs Darby, then they send him into a corner. Blade runs in to CHOP! And CHOP! And then snapmare to PENATLY KICK! Cover, TWO! Blade drags Darby over, tags in Butcher, and they DOUBLE HEADBUTT Darby down. Butcher drags Darby up to CHOP him back down. Butcher drags Darby up to bump him off buckles, then he tags Kip. Kip stomps Darby, then taunts Sting. The ref reprimands Kip but that allows Blade to CHOKE Darby! Kip howls, tags Blade, and the mugging continues.
Blade brings Darby up to ROCK him with a forearm. Blade brings Darby around to whip him to ropes, to then POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Tag to Butcher, he stomps Darby, then ties up the legs. Darby throws hands from below, but Butcher still drags him into a TEXAS CLOVERLEAF! Darby endures, claws his way around, but even Penelope taunts him with shouting, “TAP! TAP!” Dynamite returns to single picture as Darby crawls towards his corner, only for Blade to swing him out into a POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO! Darby survives but Butcher tags Kip. Kip drags Darby up to wrench an arm and whip. Darby uses that to BLAST Butcher & Blade!
Kip runs in, blocks Darby’s boot and spins Darby around to back suplex. Darby lands on his feet, but his knee jams! Darby crawls and scrambles, but Kip drags him back! Kip catches Darby, Blade trips Sting! Blade sends Sting into barriers! Darby sunset flips Kip, Kip stays up so Darby lets him go to hot tag Cassidy! Fans are thunderous as Cassidy eggs Kip on! Kip rushes Cassidy but gets a buckle bump! Cassidy goes up top, and CROSSBODIES! Cassidy keeps moving, he ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl DDT! And kip up! Fans are thunderous again as Cassidy gives Kip those “devastating” kicks! But then Butcher runs in to CLOBBER Cassidy!
Fans boo and the ref reprimands, but Butcher brings Cassidy up. Butcher lifts but Cassidy fights the bomb! Blade gets in, they DRAG THE LAKE!! Kip covers, TWO!! Cassidy survives and Kip is furious! Kip howls, runs and CANNONBALLS! Fans boo but Kip soaks it all up. Kip is too busy having fun, he misses Cassidy tag STIIIIING! Sting walks up to give those same “devastating” kicks! Kip thinks it’s Cassidy, and turns around into quite the surprise. Sting “beats” his chest, Kip swings, but into a LARIAT! Sting really fires up, and he rallies on the Superbad Squad! Kip springboards, but Sting catches him! SCORPION DEATHLOCK!!
Ford freaks out, Blade gets up and throws hands, but Sting doesn’t flinch! Butcher adds on, the 2v1 is too much and Kip gets free. But Darby returns to fire off on Butcher & Blade! Butcher blocks one, CLUBS Darby and then hoists Darby up. Darby BOOTS Blade, BITES Butcher’s hand, then runs to DOUBLE COFFIN SPLASH! Butcher & Blade bail out but Darby builds speed, into Kip’s body shot! Kip avoids Orange’s punch, to suplex, STUN-DOG MILLIONAIRE! Then Cassidy DIVES to take out Blade! Darby hops up to THROWBACK STUNNER on Kip, then he DIVES into Butcher!
Sting has Kip in the dragon sleeper, and fans are thunderous for the SCORPION DEATH DROP!! Cover, Sting’s team wins!
Winners: Sting, Darby Allin & Orange Cassidy
A huge win for the unlikeliest of trios, and Cassidy adorns Sting with the sunglasses! As for Darby, he is looking at the Double or Nothing banner. The Relentless One wants at MJF and the gold, will he be living it up in Las Vegas?
AEW shares backstage footage from last week.
After having his “Re-Bar-Mitzvah” interrupted by Darby Allin, Sammy Guevara and “Jungle Boy” Jack Perry, it was obvious Maxwell Jacob Friedman was mad. He curses up a storm, then says he is the world champion! But Darby Allin says the world title means much more than money and fame. It is him being him. And Jack Perry, for himself, his family, and everyone who supported him all this time, he is going to become champion on his own. Sammy says that the world title is his destiny! He said so since episode ONE of Dynamite that he is going to be world champion. But MJF says that’s not how it works! You don’t waltz up to the champ and call your shot, you EARN it!
MJF has beaten Darby, Sammy and JB once each in 1v1 competition in their AEW careers, and he tells them they have to become #1 contender. Good luck trying, because all three of them SUCK! Sammy says he’ll win as many matches as it takes to get that belt off MJF. JB says that you can check the record books. He’s already won more matches than any of them. Darby says he’s beaten Sammy and he’s beaten JB, so he will stop at nothing to make sure that MJF is no longer champion. Who of these three Young Pillars of AEW will be THE one that challenges MJF at Double or Nothing?
AEW takes a closer look at tonight’s main event dream match.
Excalibur narrates that, “In 2021, there was no one hotter in professional wrestling than Kenny Omega. Known as ‘The Belt Collector,’ Omega won championships around the world, including in Mexico, where he won the AAA Mega Championship. At the same time, El Hijo del Vikingo was quickly establishing himself as one of the premier luchadors in all of Mexico. A match was made for December 2021: Vikingo, Omega, for the first time ever for the AAA Mega Championship. Unfortunately, Omega’s injuries at Full Gear were so severe, they required surgery, keeping him out of action for nearly a year.
“Now, with Omega back at 100%, the dream match is on for tonight. Kenny Omega, El Hijo del Vikingo, live!” Who will come out as truly the best today?
AEW World Tag Team Championships: The Gunns VS Top Flight!
They may not be the Young Bucks, the Lucha Brothers or the Hardy Boyz, but Austin & Colten are the brother tag team reigning over AEW. But will they soon find out they are not nearly as good as they think they are? Or will the Gunns cause the Coldest Tag Team in the Game to melt down?
The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see who is really the better brother duo!
The teams sort out, Austin starts against Dante, and Independence taunts the “ASS~ BOYS!” Austin tunes that out, knuckle locks with Dante, and then he CHOPS! Austin goes up and up, but then says no no no. Austin hops down, swings on Dante, but misses! Dante knuckle locks and CHOPS, then he goes up and up and FLYING ARM-DRAGS! Dante kips up and fans fire up! Austin tags Colten, but Dante arm-drags Colten down! Tag to Darius, the Martins double whip and speed things up, to then DROPKICK Colten down! Austin runs in, but into a DROPKICK! The Gunns regroup, but the Martins double clothesline them up and out!
Fans fire up as Dante says they’re getting those belts. The “ASS~ BOYS!” regroup and Colten slides back in. Tag to Austin, he and Dante circle again, and Austin gets around to shove Dante to ropes. Dante BLASTS Colten before the cheap shot! Dante then goes up and over Austin, only for Austin to pull hair! The ref reprimands, but misses Colten HOTSHOT Dante down! Fans boo as Austin stomps and Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Austin whips Dante out of the ring, then taunts Darius to distract the ref. Colten stomps away on Dante! Colten puts Dante in before anyone notices, and Austin bumps Dante off buckles. Tag to Colten, he stomps Dante, but lets off as the ref reprimands. Colten stomps some more, he and Austin taunt Independence and Darius, then Colten drags Dante up. Colten DECKS Dante, then mocks the fans. Colten ROCKS Dante, ROCKS him again, then suplexes. Cover, TWO! Colten stays between the Martin brothers, drags Dante over and bumps him off buckles. Tag to Austin, he stomps Dante now, then digs his boots in.
The ref reprimands but Austin mocks the fans rallying for Dante. Austin lets off and Colten CHOKES Dante! Colten lets off Dante before he gets caught, and Austin tags Colten in. Colten drags Dante up, whips him to ropes, and the Gunns body shot, knee lift and LARIAT! Cover, TWO! Colten stays between the Martins again, drags Dante up and whips him to the corner. Colten runs in but Dante dodges the splash! Austin tags in and hurries to stop Dante. Austin shoves Dante down, but Dante fakes Austin out to go under! Austin still grabs a leg, tags Colten back in, and the Gunns double back suplex! But Dante lands on his feet!
Dynamite returns to single picture, Dante goes over Austin, over Colten, and tags in Darius! Darius rallies on the Gunns and fans fire up! Darius hits an atomic drop on Austin, then LARIATS Colten! Mule kick for Austin, and Darius whips him at Colten. Austin reverses but Darius uses that to UPPERCUT Colten! Austin runs back in, but is sent into Colten! Darius uses Austin to get up and ENZIGURI Colten! Darius then GERMAN SUPLEXES Austin, and STANDING SPANISH FLIES Colten! Cover, TWO! Fans rally as Darius drags Colten up. Tag to Dante, Top Flight double whip, but Colten ducks and tags Austin!
Darius leaps to CROSSBODY Colten! Austin runs in, but into a hall nelson SLAM! cover, TWO!! Dante keeps cool, he goes to the corner, but Colten grabs his leg! Dante kicks Colten away, Darius DIVES onto Colten to hit him into railing! Dante GAMANGIRIS Austin, goes up and up and NOSEDIVES!! Cover, Colten breaks it!! Fans boo but Colten was within the rules. Wait, is that THE KINGDOM!? Mike Bennett & Matt Taven are mugging Darius over their ROH losses! But Dante FLIES out onto them! Direct hit and fans fire up! Dante hurries back up, springboards again, but Austin gets under!
Colten gets in, Dante runs into a 3:10 TO YUMA!! Cover, the Gunns win!
Winners: The Gunns, by pinfall (still AEW World Tag Team Champions)
Fans boo that the Gunns win, but Darius is pissed at The Kingdom! Darius chases off Mike & Matt, will Top Flight get revenge in ROH? As for the Gunns, they hear FTR coming! Fans fire up again as Dax Harwood & Cash Wheeler step out on stage with mics in their hands! Colten gets a mic to have the FTR music stop. Colten says no one wants to hear that song and no one wants to see FTR. Fans boo because they disagree. FTR says they’re not here to fight. They’re here to talk business. Well, no one wants to hear you talk! The Gunns don’t like or respect FTR. And guess what? FTR are LOSERS! They lost three sets of belts, and lost to the Gunns!
There is nothing FTR can say or offer them to get a rematch. NOTHING! Nothing? So like, if they said they’ll never challenge the Gunns again for those titles should they lose- NO! Do you not hear what Austin is saying, “you hillbillies? NOTHING! There’s NOTHING! What do you have to offer?! NOTHING!!” Then if the Gunns wanna prove their first win wasn’t a fluke, should they win against FTR again, FTR will never tag together in AEW again. Oh, the break up? So heartbreaking! LOOK AT HIS FACE! NOTHING!! Okay, okay. Dax says if FTR can’t beat the Gunns to win the AEW World Tag Team Championships, FTR will just quit AEW.
Fans boo, but it seems that got through to the Gunns. If the Gunns beat FTR again, FTR leaves AEW forever? Yes, that’s what Dax said. Well, in that case, deal! The Gunns and FTR shake on it, but then Gunns literally spin in FTR’s faces! The Gunns run for it, but the match is coming either way. Will the “ASS~ BOYS!” get their asses kicked? Or will they be the team that banishes FTR from AEW?
Backstage interview with Jade Cargill, Leila Grey & Mark Sterling.
Renee Paquette is with the AEW TBS Champion, her Last Baddie Standing and her legal representation. Renee says that Taya Valkyrie is All Elite now, and she has her eye on the TBS title. What is Jade’s reaction to that? “Renee, cut the sh*t. We had this Taya girl come in and interrupt my moment to answer an open challenge that was already closed, baby girl. And then, had the audacity to use my finisher. Mark, tie this up.” Sterling has a document, it is a Cease & Desist order. This will be sent to Taya Valkyrie, telling Taya that she is no longer allowed to use the chicken wing facebuster, which is also Jade’s move, as her finisher.
Leila says that she should deliver this document to Taya personally, this Saturday on Rampage. Because she has a few words of her own for Taya. So that’s an official challenge? Yes. Welcome to #ThatBitchShow. Will La Wera Loca have a jaded response to this frivolous lawsuit?
No Disqualifications: Hook VS Stokely Hathaway!
An injured arm turned into a suspension turned into a settlement turned into a high stakes bet that The Firm lost, and now it has resulted in this match. And though Ethan Page, Matt Hardy, Isiah Kassidy, Lee Moriarty & “Big Bill” Morrissey see Stokely off, they can’t stay per the stipulations of the bet. As the introduction says, “He’s not as large as the men he represents, he has the heart of a lion and the wisdom of an owl.” But will any of that help him defeat The Cold-Hearted Handsome Devil?
As Hook makes his entrance, Stokely grabs the mic to say, “Whoa, whoa, whoa! I’ve got some breaking news! I spoke to Dr. Simpson (he means Sampson) earlier, and he said I am not medically cleared to compete. I know, I know. I wanted to so bad. And I would also, what a coinky-dink, announce that I am retiring.” What? Stokely thanks all 12 of his fands, God bless! Justin, here, doctor’s note. Make it official. Justin takes the note, and it reads, “He is SICK.” Justin says that with all due respect, that’s a receipt for Wingstop. The ref RIPS the receipt! And the bell rings! Fans fire up and Hook is ready, so Stokely bails!
Stokely runs around the ring, out to the crowd, but Hook pursues! Fans fire up as Hook chases Stokely down, drags him back, CLUBS him, then brings him over to KNEE and TOSS! Stokely ends up at ringside again and fans are thunderous! Hook stalks Stokely, Stokely runs in to UPPERCUT, but Stokely bounces off of Hook! Stokely scurries away, gets back up, and runs in, but into a leg capture! EL CAMINO to the floor! Fans fire up as Hook drags Stokely up, puts him in the ring, and then looks under the ring. Fans fire up more, because here comes a SPARE GUARD RAIL! Hook puts that in the ring while the Firm can only watch.
Hardy tries to calm the group down, Stokely can take care of himself with things getting “hardcore.” Ethan says no he can’t, they didn’t practice any of the hardcore stuff! Stokely bails out again but Hook puts the railing in a corner. Hook drags Stokely up but Stokely BLASTS Hook with the fire extinguisher! Fans boo but Stokely gets a chair! Stokely smacks the steps a couple times, he says, “I’m not a killer, but don’t push me! That’s Tupac.” Stokely hurries in, fans rally up, and Stokely swings, but Hook blocks! Hook BOOTS Stokely, then SMACKS him on the back! And again! And again! And again!
Hook throws the chair aside, Stokely is barely moving! But Hook drags Stokely up to EL CAMINO onto the railing! The railing BENDS! Hook drags Stokely off the railing, covers, but then pulls him up at TWO! Hook wants REDRUM!!! Stokely is OUT, Hook wins!
Winner: Hook, by submission
The FTW Champion could’ve ended it sooner, but he chose to teach Stokely a lesson: Do not get on Hook’s bad side. Hardy says Ethan must avenge Stokely! Ethan can beat Hook! Hardy is gonna get a match made right now! All Ego is ready, but will he be ready when they #SendHook?
Adam Cole is here!
Fans fire up as the Undisputed One heads to the ring. Naturally, everyone joins in on the “BOOM!” and “ADAM COLE BAYBAY!” Cole gets the mic and says, “Wow. Hey, hey, I think I know the answer to this, but who’s ready for Storytime with Adam Cole, baybay?” Everyone cheers! Cole continues with, “Seven days. We are just seven days away from me making my in-ring return here in AEW. And listen, I know I’ve talked a ton about my struggles and what I went through, but as far as how I’m feeling right now? Guys, I feel freaking great. I have never been more ready, never been more prepared, to get back in this ring, doing what I love, and that is wrestle for AEW.”
Fans are fired up, and Cole knows everyone has questions. “The biggest one being: Who is my opponent going to be on March 29th?” Fans echo, “Who? Who? Who?” Cole starts to speak, but here comes Daniel Garcia! Fans boo as Red Death has the mic to say, “Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Who’s ready for Storytime with Daniel Garcia, baybay?” Garcia knows Cole’s been gone awhile, so here’s an update on a few things. Fans tell Garcia to STFU already but Garcia says since Cole’s been gone, Garcia’s become a real veteran in AEW. All the boys in the back respect him so much that he is a locker room leader!
Fans boo more but Garcia says as locker room leader, it is his duty to come out here to not only welcome Cole back, but to put him in his place, too. Garcia says Cole may not remember, but here’s an update on what Garcia’s been doing the last nine months while Cole was home, “playing stupid video games on Twitch.” Cole smirks but allows it. Brody King: beat him! Ricky Starks: beat him! Bryan Danielson: Garcia beat him, too. Garcia’s main-evented more AEW programming over the past year than anyone else on the roster! Garcia is the lifeblood that pumps through this company. And he’s to respect Cole? To welcome Cole back? Where’s Garcia’s warm welcome?
Where is Garcia’s respect when he’s been here, been doing this, and proved himself as one of the best pro-wrest- Oops. Freudian slip there? Garcia corrects himself, “Sports entertainers on the planet today!” That’s what Garcia is! So what makes Cole so special? “What makes me special? When they ring the freakin’ bell, that’s what makes me special! That’s what makes m e special.” Cole admits he likes Garcia. Garcia is really, really good. And some day, he could be leading the charge in AEW. The problem is the company he keeps.
“The Jericho Appreciation Society, they’ve done a great job of giving you this false sense of security. This overconfidence, which sometimes is good, and sometimes is bad. But let me remind you, even me not wrestling for nine months, I am still Adam Cole Baybay. I am a multi-time world champion. I have traveled the globe, fought and beat some of the very best! As a matter of fact, while I was sitting at home for nine months, I was wondering if I’d ever get the chance to wrestle again, hoping, praying, willing to do anything for a second chance. And looks like I found that second chance.”
Fans fire up and Cole says if Garcia is crazy enough to want the match, then dammit, he’s on! Adam Cole VS Daniel Garcia, first-time-ever, next week on Dynamite! But Cole will remind Garcia of something: “This is not just my return match; this is a statement. It’s a statement to the entire locker room that one of the best damn pro-wrestlers on the planet is BACK, baybay.” Fans are fired up for “ADAM COLE! ADAM COLE!” Cole hopes Garcia realizes what he’ sin for. Because Cole promises next week will be a great night. A great night for Cole, for the fans, but for Garcia… Not so much. “See you next week, Garcia. BOOM.”
Cole is ready, Garcia is ready, but will the Dragonslayer stay a great sports enner-tay-ners? Or will the pro-wrestler in him rise to the surface against one of the greatest pro-wrestlers alive today?
Alex Marvez is outside The Elite’s locker room.
Marvez can hear a conversation going on inside, and he steps inside. Callis and Omega are talking, and Callis wants Marvez to hold on. What is Omega’s concern here? Omega’s concern is that his best friends left in an ambulance! He should’ve gone with them! Callis says he sent Cutler and Nakazawa with them. Omega has a match tonight! Hear Callis out. He’s a glass half full kind of guy. Injuries happen, but hear him out. The Bucks going to the hospital might’ve been the best thing for Omega and Callis. It allows for focus! Omega is in a singles match, the God of Pro-Wrestling is back! “Those kids will be fine in a few months.”
Callis now has Marvez join in. “Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo is gonna blow the roof off! The God of Pro-Wrestling is BACK, and it starts tonight on Dynamite! Now get out.” Marvez throws this back to ringside, but is Callis only thinking of his benefit, not Kenny’s?
Jon Moxley w/ The Blackpool Combat Club VS Stu Grayson w/ The Dark Order!
The Maniac, along with Claudio Castagnoli & Wheeler Yuta, have torn into the Dark Order from Silver to Reynolds to Evil Uno. They did all that to anger Hangman Page, but they’ve also angered #PlayerTwo! Moxley may be #ForgedByCombat, but will he survive someone born and bred for combat?
The bell rings and Stu RAMS Moxley into a corner! Fans fire up as Stu fires off on Moxley but lets off as the ref counts. Moxley turns things around to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP! Moxley pie faces Stu, but Stu turns things around to CHOP back! Stu stalks Moxley to another corner, KNEES him and CLUBS him, then stalks him to a third corner. Moxley kicks low, ROCKS Stu with a forearm, then another, then digs his boots in. The ref counts, Moxley steps off at 4, then Moxley drags Stu up to headlock takeover. Stu keeps his shoulders up, the Dark Order coaches him up but Moxley gets a knuckle lock cover. TWO as Stu gets his left arm up.
Moxley pushes the hand down, covers, TWO as Stu gets the right arm up. Moxley pushes that arm down again, covers, ONE as Stu gets his left arm back up. Stu fights to his feet but Moxley kicks low. Moxley headlocks, Stu powers out but Moxley RAMS him! Moxley runs, but Stu RAMS him! Moxley runs in, clips Stu but is sent out of the ring. Stu hurries out after Moxley, Moxley throws a chair! Stu avoids it, ROCKS Moxley and puts him in the ring. Moxley kicks back, but Stu RANAS! Stu fires forearms, CHOPS Moxley in the corner, then throws knees. Stu whips corner to corner, Moxley reverses and avoids the up ‘n’ over!
Moxley reels Stu in for a SAIDO! Stu staggers up but then flops out to the apron. Moxley runs to BLAST Stu off and to the barriers! Moxley flips Stu off while Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Yuta & Claudio taunt Stu as the ring count climbs. The Dark Order coaches Stu up and he gets in the ring at 5 of 10, but Moxley is right on him. Stu throws a forearm, then another, and another, and another! But Moxley ROCKS Stu with just one! Stu falls over and Claudio yawns. It seems this isn’t competitive enough for the Swiss Superman. Moxley has the legs, he stomps Stu in the stomach, then ties the legs up. But Stu fights back with fists! Moxley still powers Stu into the TEXAS CLOVERLEAF! Stu endures as Moxley sits deep, and he reaches out to the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Moxley lets off at 4.
Moxley drags Stu up to CHOP, but Stu CHOPS back! Stu fires forearms, whips, and DROPKICKS Moxley! Moxley goes to a corner, Stu is after hm with a whip, but Moxley reverses to clothesline! Moxley then brings Stu out to X-PLEX! Moxley paces around, the BCC applauds, but the Dark Order coaches Stu. Moxley reels Stu in, lifts him, and hooks the legs to hit the GOTCH PILEDRIVER! Cover, TWO!! Stu is still in this, but Moxley has the knuckle locks back. Dynamite returns to single picture as Moxley rains down the DRAGON STOMPS! Cover, TWO!! Stu hangs tough again, but Moxley just taunts him.
Fans rally, Stu rises, and Moxley KICKS him in the chest! And KICKS him again! Moxley eggs Stu on, then KICKS him more! Moxley SLAPS Stu! Stu snarls and stands up to fire off forearms! Stu whips, Moxley reverses but Stu CLOBBERS him! Stu dodges, tilt-o-whirls and REVERSE DDTS! Then he rains down HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! Fans fire up as Stu gives Moxley a taste of his own medicine! And then the SIDE EFFECT! SPRINGBOARD MARIPOSA! Cover, TWO!! Moxley survives and Stu grows frustrated. Stu hurries up a corner, but Yuta distracts! Fans boo but the Dark Order storm up on the BCC!
Stu decides to change course, he ARIHARA MOONSAULTS onto Yuta & Claudio! But Moxley DIVES onto Stu! Moxley puts Stu in the ring, hurries after him, but Stu BOOTS Moxley down! Stu hurries back up top, for the 450 SPLASH!! Cover, TWO!! Moxley survives again and Stu is shocked! But Stu slashes the throat and drags Moxley up. Torture rack, but Moxley slips off right into the BULLY CHOKE!! Stu endures, but he’s turning red! Moxley shifts to the facelock to throw in KNEE after KNEE! Then he shifts to the REAR NAKED CHOKE! But Stu fights up to his feet! Fans fire up but Stu is fading again!
But Stu is still on his feet, and he revives! BACKPACK CANNONBALL!! Both men crash into buckles and Stu is free! Fans are thunderous again and Moxley sputters back to his feet. Moxley brings Stu up, but Stu slips out of the underhooks! PELE!! Moxley falls down and the BCC coach him up. Stu goes back to a corner, climbs back up top, but Moxley ROCKS him first! Moxley climbs, CLUBS away on Stu, then CLAWS Stu’s back. Moxley HEADBUTTS Stu, brings him up into underhooks! SUPER DEATH RIDER!! Cover, Moxley wins!!
Winner: Jon Moxley, by pinfall
The Dark Order hurry into the ring and Moxley backs off, there won’t be any extracurriculars here. But will the Dark Order ever get payback on the mean SOBs in the BCC?
Backstage interview with Ricky Starks.
Renee says she can feel the frustration coming off The Absolute. The back ‘n’ forth with him and Juice Robinson, where do they stand? You tell him! Starks is “sick and tired of talking back and forth. No action, all talk.” Starks doesn’t wanna stand around, take time off his vacation, just to say Juice, he doesn’t like that you attacked him from behind. That’s cool and all, but whatever! How about this, though? Saturday Night Rampage, Starks is done talking. If Juice wants to face him man to man, then he can find Starks on Rampage! If not, just stop! Starks is over it, he is so sick of it! This is the craziest thing he’s been a part of his whole life!
Starks is issuing the open challenge to Juice. If Juice accepts it or not, is a man or not, Starks doesn’t give a damn anymore. The Absolute will be waiting, but will the Booster oblige?
AEW presents an all-new episode of QTV!
QT Marshall says great job last week in their debut, keep the “credibility train” rolling. CHOO-CHOO~! He needs scoops! Harley Cameron says she actually has discovered a “hot new prospect.” Goes by the name of Rey Fenix. And actually, here’s some footage. Hobbs POUNCING Fenix into buckles int heir TNT title match, and the spinebuster, and the Town Business. Everyone has a laugh, and QT says, “Imagine being in the Lucha Brothers, and your own lucha brother doesn’t come out to help you.” Aaron Solo says there is definitely some miedo! Then he laughs while also puffing mouth spray…?
QT asks who the hecc is Alex Abrahantes? Harley says Alex should work on his “character development.” Speaking of, how about Solo stealing Wardlow’s identity and freezing all of his accounts? Oopsie~! Yeah, Wardlow’s gonna lose his house and car, too! And Solo hacked into some observer’s accounts, started this whole thing about hotels. HAHA! QT just got a call from Hobbs. This Saturday on Rampage, another Open Challenge for the TNT title! Can’t wait to see who is the next chapter in the Book of Hobbs. Well, wait no longer! PENTA wants payback for Fenix as he answers the call! Will Hobbs be the one with some fear?
Toni Storm w/ The Outcasts VS Skye Blue!
The Lightning From Down Under has been striking down “spoiled rookies” again and again, but in the Dark. Will she do so again in the spotlight of Dynamite? Or will Skye roll the Storm away?
The bell rings and Storm BLASTS Skye with a forearm! Then she stomps a mudhole into Skye in the corner! The ref counts, Storm lets off but she grins and soaks up the heat. Soho & Saraya mock Skye, then Storm bumps her off buckles., Skye elbows back, fires forearms in return, and the fans fire up! But Storm knees low! Storm whips Skye, Skye kicks back! Skye ROCKS Storm again and again, but Storm shoves her away. Skye comes back, spins Storm for a KNEE SMASH and a DROPKICK! Storm bails out, fans fire up and Skye goes to the apron! FLYING RANA! Fans fire up with Skye but Saraya is mad.
Skye puts Storm in the ring, climbs up the corner, but Storm ROCKS her! Skye falls to the apron, then Storm HIP ATTACKS Skye to the floor! Storm distracts the ref, allowing Soho & Saraya to stomp away on Skye! Fans boo but the Outcasts get away with it! Saraya says, “This is OUR house!” Storm goes out to fetch Skye, and RAMS her into the apron. Storm CHOPS Skye against the post, then bumps her off the other. Storm CHOPS Skye again! Saraya says do it again! Storm puts some stank on this one, but Skye ducks, so the chop hits POST! Saraya & Soho panic as Storm clutches her fingers! Skye then runs in, but Storm dodges so Soho gets DECKED!
Storm CLOBBERS Skye from behind while the ring count climbs. Storm refreshes the ring count, Saraya shouts at Skye, and Storm CHOPS Skye again. Storm stalks Skye around the way as Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Storm drags Skye around to snap suplex her to the floor! Storm flexes, perhaps taunting Jamie Hayter wherever she’s watching this from, and then she goes back for Skye. Storm puts Skye in the ring, flexes more, then drags Skye up. Storm whips Skye to ropes, BOOTS her down, covers, ONE! Cover again, TWO! Another cover, TWO!! Skye is still in this but Storm clamps on with a full nelson. Storm leans on the hold, thrashes Skye around, but Skye endures. Skye fights up, but Storm throws her down by her hair! The ref reprimands but Storm just stalks Skye. Storm kicks Skye around, has her in the corner, and digs her boot in.
The ref counts, Storm stomps but lets off at 4. Storm drags Skye up to snap suplex! Storm grins then stalks Skye. Storm drags Skye up to snap suplex again! Storm flexes more, stalks Skye to another corner, then wrenches her hair to TOSS her across the way! The ref reprimands but Storm just wrenches hair and TOSSES Skye again! Dynamite returns to single picture as Storm soaks up the heat. But Skye shoves Storm down! And then TOSSES Storm by her hair! And again! Skye fires up, runs corner to corner, but Storm puts her on the apron. Skye ROUNDHOUSES! Skye climbs up, to CROSSBODY!
Fans fire up, Skye keeps moving, she ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl headscissor! Storm ends up on ropes, Skye runs to SHINING WIZARD! Snapmare and SUPER- NO, Storm blocks and spins Skye, but Skye BASEMENT ENZIGURIS! Cover, TWO!! Storm survives and Skye grows frustrated. Saraya & Soho are also frustrated, they rally for Storm but the fans rally for Skye. Saraya tells the fans to shut up! Skye runs, hops on, but Storm shrugs her off! Skye SUPERKICKS! Skye runs, into a THESZ PRESS! Storm rains down fists, then she snarls as she stands back up. Storm gets the legs, but Skye kicks her away!
Skye runs in, only for Storm to spin her around! Storm uses the ropes, TORNADO DDT! Cover, TWO!! Skye survives and fans fire up! Saraya is furious but the ref says the count was fair. Skye goes to a corner but Storm says kiss this. SWEET HIP- NO, Skye picks the ankle! Skye KNEES Storm, runs, avoids Soho’s swipe, and she hits CODE BLUE!! But Soho is still distracting the ref!! Skye would’ve had this if not for Soho! Skye gets in Soho’s face, swings at her, but Storm runs in! Skye sends Storm into Soho, rolls and bridges, TWO!!! Storm stands, into a BOOT! Skye full nelsons, Storm arm-drags free to SHOTGUN Skye down!
Saraya says Storm has this now! Storm says kiss this, and here comes SWEET HIP MUSIC!! GERMAN SUPLEX, and then STORM ZERO!! Cover, Storm wins!
Winner: Toni Storm, by pinfall
The Outcasts with the assist, but now they bring out the spray paint! Fans boo as the Outcast scare off the ref, then surround Skye! But here comes Riho and Willow! Just like last week, Riho has the pipe!! Riho runs the Outcast off and warns them. The Outcasts leave for now, having gotten the win. Will Riho, Willow and Skye start thinking of sticking together from now on?
The AEW medical staff checks on Stu Grayson.
They’re working on his left arm, where did they feel it pop? But then Moxley sneaks up to say, “It’s just business.” And he puts on the SLEEPER!! Claudio & Yuta TOSS the medics aside! Stu is all alone as Moxley chokes him out, then SMACKS him off a trunk! The BCC give Stu the icepack back then leave, what will Hangman & the Dark Order have to say about this?
Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo!
The AAA Mega Championship match that was meant to happen in December of 2021 was denied because of injury and misfortune. But now we are all fortunate enough to have this match happen here! “HE was the longest reigning Mega Champion at 765 days, 292 days more than El Hijo del Vikingo. HE never lost that title. HE is undefeated in singles matches in Mexico and also on Dynamite. Many people say HE is also undefeated at life. HE is often complimented on his accomplishments, matches, chiseled physique and hair, yet he is personally proud of his win-loss record in Independence, Missouri, which is better than his record of 1-1 in… NOOOORTH CAROLINA~!
“He arrives tonight after his 833 mile journey from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. Weighing 224 pounds, HE is…! KENNY! OOOOOOOOOOOOMEEEEGAAAAAA~!” The fans go wild for the Cleaner, the Best Bout Machine, and Don Callis’ God of Pro-Wrestling, but will Omega prove he is better than the Mega Champion?
But as Omega makes his way down the ramp, El Hijo del Vikingo DIVES onto him! Fans fire up, EHDV throws off his cape, then he runs again, to FLY! Direct hit again and Independence is thunderous! EHDV puts Omega in the ring, springboards and MISSILE DROPKICKS! Omega ends up in a corner, EHDV runs in to clothesline! EHDV fires off forearms, but Omega turns it around to fire them back! The ref wants them to let off, this isn’t a match yet! Omega rains down fists, lets off, and now the bell rings! Fans are thunderous as Omega stomps EHDV down. Omega drags EHDV up, whips him corner to corner, but EHDV slips out to the apron!
Omega hits buckles, then EHDV ENZIGURIS! And GAMANGIRIS! EHDV climbs up, and jumps to IMPOLODER DRAGONRANA! Omega goes flying, then staggers up into the SCREW HIGH KICK! Omega’s on the ropes, EHDV runs to DOUBLE KNEE him through the ropes! Omega falls to the floor, EHDV refreshes the count, and fans say “This is Awesome!” EHDV SHOOTING STAR PRESSES to the floor! A bit double-edged, but fans lose their minds! Callis protests, the ring count climbs, but EHDV puts Omega in the ring. EHDV aims, slingshots and then springboards to 450 SPLASH! Cover, TWO!!
Omega goes to a corner, EHDV runs in to GAMANGIRI again! Omega staggers away, EHDV pursues but Omega CHOPS! And CHOPS again! EHDV falls over but Omega stalks him to a corner. Omega brings EHDV up to JAB! And JAB! fans rally and duel, Omega drags EHDV up to whip. Omega scoops EHDV for a tilt-o-whirl BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Omega drags EHDV back up fast, to fisherman BUSTER! Cover, TWO! EHDV hangs tough and Omega is frustrated but the fans are loving this. Omega stalks EHDV to the ropes, scrapes him to the apron, and then Omega goes out to follow EHDV.
Omega CLUBS EHDV, and whips him hard into barriers! EHDV falls in a heap, but Omega goes looking under the ring. Omega brings out a TABLE! Fans fire up for that, and Omega stands that table up near the ring. The ref reprimands, this isn’t a Tables match or anything like that. But fans chant, “WE WANT TABLES!” as Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Omega drags EHDV up, puts him in the ring, and Omega storms up to scoop and BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Omega clamps on with an armlock and chinbar, but he also fishhooks EHDV’s face! The ref reprimands, Omega lets off, but then pulls on EHDV’s hair! The ref counts but Omega lets off at 4. Omega looms over EHDV, stomps him, stomps him more, then springboard stomps! Omega drags EHDV around to KNEE him in the side! And again! Cover, TWO! EHDV hangs tough but Omega just snarls. Omega drags EHDV up to CHOP him back down! Omega drags EHDV up again to CLUB him back down!
Omega drags EHDV up at the ropes, ROCKS him with a right hand, then ROCKS him again! And again! And again! The ref reprimands and counts, Omega lets off, but then Omega CHOKES EHDV with his foot! Dynamite returns, the fans boo and the ref counts, but Omega lets off at 4 again. Omega ROCKS EHDV again, JABS him, then whips him to ropes. EHDV ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl RANA! Omega goes to the apron, fans fire up as EHDV pursues! EHDV ROCKS Omega, but Omega tomahawk chops back! EHDV CHOPS, but Omega CHOPS! EHDV CHOPS back, so Omega BOOTS him! Omega runs in, goes up, and he MONKEY FLIPS EHDV on the apron!
EHDV falls to the floor while fans lose minds over how tight that one was. Omega drags EHDV up to the apron, and he grins as he looks at the table he set up. Omega drags EHDV up, the ref reprimands but Omega full nelsons! EHDV slips free to GAMANGIRI again! EHDV goes up top, balances on the post, and FLYING DRAGONRANAS!! Fans are thunderous as Omega hits the floor! Omega flounders into the ring, EHDV shoves him further in. Fans say “This is Awesome!” as both men go to corners. EHDV runs corner to corner to clothesline! EHDV hoists Omega up top, and GAMANGIRIS yet again!
EHDV climbs up after Omega, fans fire up again as they start to brawl! Omega HEADBUTTS, reels EHDV in, and SUPER POWER- STEINER!!! EHDV reverses just in time, Omega clutches his head! EHDV goes to the ropes, stands from the middle and PHOENIX SPLASHES in!!! Cover, TWO?!?! Omega survives by nanoseconds!! Independence is electric as both men rise up! They hope these two “FIGHT FOREVER!” but it has to end somehow! EHDV throws a forearm, a SOBAT, and then he runs to springboard, into a POWERBOMB!! And then another POWERBOMB! Roll through and V-TRIGGER!! Cover, TWO!!!
Omega is furious as EHDV survives! Omega slashes his throat, drags EHDV up, and he full nelsons for a SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX! Omega snarls, he puts EHDV on the ropes and takes aim. BANG and V-TRIGGER!! But that’s not the end of it! Omega drags EHDV up, deadweight as he is, and Electric Chair Lifts! But EHDV throws down fists! EHDV hops down, UPPERCUTS, then goes up and up to FLYING POISON-RANA!!! Omega tumbles to the apron, and EHDV crawls over to push him onto the table! EHDV builds speed while fans fire up, and he goes up to ESCALARA 630 SENTON through the table!!!!
Independence is volcanic for “A E DUB! A E DUB!” while Callis is freaking out! Both men are down in the wreckage as the ring count starts. EHDV crawls away at 3 of 10, Omega finally stirs at 4. Both men drag themselves up at 6, stand at “OCHO!” And both men slide in at 9! EHDV covers, TWO!!! Omega is still in this and EHDV is beside himself! Fans rally up, both men rise again, and EHDV throws a haymaker! Omega gives it back, they go back and forth, faster and faster! They go forearm for forearm, stand up, and keep throwing shots! EHDV gets the edge, SOBATS, runs, into a V-TRIGGER!!
Omega whips, EHDV rolls up and SUNSET FLIP BOMBS! TWO?!?!? Omega narrowly escapes again and even HE is shocked! But EHDV hurries to a corner and climbs up top! Omega flounders in the drop zone, EHDV 630 SENTONS but FLOPS as Omega moves!! EHDV flounders up, into a V-TRIGGER!!! Omega drags EHDV up, Electric Chair Lifts, ONE WINGED ANGEL!!!! Cover, OMEGA WINS!
Winner: Kenny Omega, by pinfall
This was a dream match the moment it was made, but this became an all-time classic by the end! Tony Schiavone joins Callis and Omega in the ring to say this was an incredible match. Omega is back in singles competition, and that was one for the ages! Omega thanks Schiavone for that. The more time goes by, the more he wonders if he can still do this kind of stuff for the fans. Wait, wait! THE BCC JUMPS OMEGA!! Moxley, Claudio & Yuta all mug Omega, and fans boo while Callis can only shout at the ref to stop this! The BCC stand Omega up so they can throw body shots and haymakers!
Fans continue to boo, but wait! Sirens? An ambulance has returned? For who? Wait, HANGMAN is driving it!! The Cowboy has a 2×4, with nails in it! Fans are going nuts for “COWBOY SH*T!” while the BCC stomp away on Omega. But here comes Hangman, wood in hand! The BCC decide to bail! Callis checks on Omega but the damage has been done. Hangman wants Moxley to get his ass back in here, but he stays back. Callis tries to calm Hangman down, but he almost gets 2×4 to the face! Callis keeps pulling at Hangman’s arm to hold him back, but Hangman shakes free and Callis falls right down! Omega comes to, and misunderstands why Callis is down!
Callis blames Hangman but Hangman says he didn’t do anything to Don! Omega and Hangman argue, Callis cowers behind Omega, and Omega takes Callis’ side. Fans boo, but is this just Callis keeping Omega all to himself?
A great episode of Dynamite, but it already feels like they’re gonna keep things going until Double or Nothing, no big thing for April. We got a great promo out of the Four Young Pillars, and MJF is making the other three run the #1 contender race like he did Bryan Danielson from now until, I dunno, probably May 3rd so that May can focus on building MJF VS his challenger. Hard to say who it’ll be, but Darby’s off to a good start with that great Six Man Tag. Darby, Sting and Cassidy made an eclectic but great combination, especially with Sting borrowing some Freshly Squeezed tactics. And Cassidy’s International Championship card is open to just about anyone at this point.
Really good tag title match, but I should’ve figured shenanigans would help The Gunns retain. The Kingdom and Top Flight are solidly ROH Tag title contenders with #ReachForTheSky needing teams. Plus, The Gunns’ real story is with FTR, who came back to have a really good promo with them. Gunns VS FTR, Titles VS AEW contracts could honestly go either way. There’s a lot of talk out there of FTR going back to WWE since it’s under HHH right now, so this move could be how FTR exits AEW, but this could also be what guarantees FTR staying. Either way, this is going to be some really big stuff for the titles.
Good promo from Jade and her group, and you do have to appreciate Sterling’s gimmick of bringing about frivolous lawsuits on behalf of people to poke fun at wrestling tropes. The security guards finally got justice, even though they also got crushed by Wardlow, and now finishers that are exactly the same but with different names are being questioned. Pretty sure Leila loses the match and Taya tears up that document, though. Then it’ll be about who hits the chicken wing facebuster first to win that title. Jade has done an amazing job being an undefeated inaugural TBS Champion, but now is the time to move on to someone else so Jade can move on to the top title.
Great segment out of Hook, Stokely and The Firm. Great show from Stokely with trying to weasel out of this, then trying to run away from this, but of course he gets thrown around. Awesome use of spare guard railing, though. I figured Hook VS Ethan was going to be how this wraps up, can’t wait to see how that goes. And I appreciate Starks getting a little meta on the bad pacing of feuds. Starks VS Juice for Rampage, if it happens, will be great stuff, and maybe shenanigans helps Juice win to keep this going. Though, I feel like Starks and Juice could each be doing something better than spinning their wheels with each other. Give me Starks VS Hobbs and Orange VS Juice for those respective titles.
Speaking of which, only the second QTV segment and I’m just done with it. But they did point out the weird logic of Penta not being out there with Fenix last week. Penta VS Hobbs will probably go the same as Fenix VS Hobbs did, and Wardlow will come back for revenge. Also, another wrestling trope that needs poking at: Solo confessed to illegal activities but he won’t get investigated or arrested because it’s wrestling. If Sterling were a Face lawyer, he’d be right on Solo’s ass. But maybe Wardlow beats the crap out of Solo as his punishment, then he gets his shot at Hobbs at Double or Nothing to put this story to rest.
Great promo from Cole and Garcia, and I appreciate they had Garcia have that slip of the tongue. Garcia is of course enjoying the fun side of being a sports entertainer, showing off his personality and just doing whatever shenanigans he wants, but he also clearly enjoys the pro-wrestling stuff of just fighting. Garcia VS Cole is going to be awesome stuff, but Garcia and the JAS also have their story with the House of Black so who knows how the finish goes. Great match out of Storm VS Skye, and Skye looked great even in defeat. Another inconsistency in wrestling logic: Riho & Willow should’ve been ringside to start because they know The Outcasts will be up to no good. But I suppose that does give Riho & Willow their moment of heroism in running the Outcasts off.
I bring up that inconsistency in logic because that match was after Moxley VS Grayson, where both men had their allies ringside. The men can think to bring their boys but the women’s division can’t think to bring their friends along, when we’ve also always seen Britt have Rebel and/or Hayter and vice-versa? Anyway, great stuff out of Moxley VS Grayson, and Grayson also looked awesome even in defeat. The BCC apparently went after everyone Hangman considers a friend, as the Bucks were taken out off-camera by them, and then the BCC jump Grayson.
And then, for being a non-title TV main event, Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo went above and beyond anything I would’ve expected. There were some scary moments, like that Super Steiner counter to the powerbomb. But then again, it wouldn’t feel like an AAA match if there wasn’t some risk like that. BCC jumping Omega after he wins was a good way to keep the Elite reunion story going, but now there’s the new wrinkle of Don Callis wanting Omega to stay a singles star. To be fair, this is very much like the story of Callis, Omega and The Elite when AEW first got started. Callis wants Omega to return to that Omega, and he throws Hangman under the bus.
Another pro-wrestling logic thing is that no one watches the show back when it’s done, unless it helps the story. And I would hope Omega does that here to see what really happened as opposed to just trusting Callis and distrusting Omega. Or if not Omega, the Bucks can. The Bucks will have seen it on TV at the hospital (kayfabe) and The Bucks will tell Omega that Hangman didn’t hit Callis. Callis is also trying to recruit Konosuke, so it’d be great if Callis only comes out of this with one client. If Omega realizes not to trust Callis over The Elite, then Callis and Konosuke can stick together. If Omega still keeps Callis around, Konosuke can reject Callis to stay his own man.
My Score: 8.9/10
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Mitchell’s AEW Dark Results & Report! (3/21/23)
Toni Storm gets Dark!
AEW Dark is on #ToniTime!
The Outcasts have drawn a line in the AEW Women’s Division, and are daring everyone else to cross it! Will Toni Storm strike down another “entitled rookie?”
- Juice Robinson VS Leon Ruffin; Juice wins.
- Kiera Hogan VS Leila Grey; Leila wins.
- The Iron Savages VS The Wingmen; The Iron Savages win.
- The Renegades VS Avery Breaux & Mafiosa; The Renegades win.
- Toni Storm VS Billie Starkz; Storm wins.
Another surprisingly short line-up for Dark, with a couple matches that could go either way. The Iron Savages, formerly Bear Country, and the Wingmen will be a good one, but I’m leaning towards Bronson & Boulder winning that. Kiera Hogan VS Leila Grey, former Baddie taking on Jade’s last sidekick standing, could also go either way, but I’m leaning towards Kiera. But it’ll be good to see Robyn & Charlette Renegade get a win here to build that unofficial Women’s Tag Division AEW has.
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Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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