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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (12/23/22)

It’s a Holiday Rampage!

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Three wise men will be $300,000 richer!

AEW splurges for the holidays with a massive cash prize to the team that survives tonight’s Casino Trios Royale! Who will be living like kings this Christmas?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Three Kings Christmas Casino Trios Royale: AR Fox & Top Flight win the $300,000 prize.
  • AEW TBS Championship Eliminator Match: Jade Cargill w/ The Baddies VS Vertvixen; Cargill wins and denies Vertvixen a title match.
  • Anthony Bowens & Billy Gunn VS Jeff Jarrett & Jay Lethal w/ Sonjay Dutt & Satnam Singh; Jarrett & Lethal win.

PLAY BY PLAY

Three Kings Christmas Casino Trios Royale!

Ringside is a briefcase of THREE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS! But only one team can claim it as their Christmas bonus, who will be the three left cashing in at the end of the chaos?

The bell rings, and we have the Superbad Squad (Kip Sabian, The Butcher & The Blade) and La Faccion Ingobernables (Rush, Dralistico & Preston Vance) mugging Best Friends (Orange Cassidy, Trent Beretta & Chuck Taylor), 2v1 times three! Fans boo as all those men stomp and punch away on Freshly Squeezed and friends! But then Cassidy kicks Rush & Kip away at the same time Trent shoves Butcher & Blade and Chuck shoves Dralistico & Vance! All six men rush back at Best Friends, but Best Friends dodge to GROUP HUG! You GOT to give the people what they want for Christmas! But then the brawl is on again!

Trent, Cassidy & Chuck each throw someone out, but Dralistico clings to ropes, Kip lands safe on the apron, and Blade manages to Spider-Man to ropes! The others go after Best Friends, Rush DECKS Cassidy! Butcher & Blade hit Trent with a LARIAT BACK SUPLEX! CANNONBALL from Kip to Trent! Cassidy bails out under the ropes to stay safe, only for Rush to copy him and CLOBBER him! The others brawl with Best Friends while Rush LASHES Cassidy with that bright green cable! Jose dumps water on Cassidy while Kip talks trash. Chuck bumps Blade off buckles, he dodges Butcher, and then he OVERHEAD suplexes Kip onto Butcher!

The ref reprimands, Rush finally stops choking Cassidy, but Chuck serves Blade SOLE FOOD! Chuck runs, but into Vance’s TOP TEN SPINEBUSTER! Fans boo Vance so he flips them off. Vance TOSSES and ELIMINATES Chuck! Best Friends are a Kentucky Gentleman down as this match continues! And here comes the Blackpool Combat Club! Claudio Castagnoli, Wheeler Yuta & Jon Moxley all go to the ring from the ramp, they brawl with the Superbad Squad! Claudio puts Blade on a corner, Moxley rains down fists on Butcher all the way to “OCHO!” and Yuta fires off hands on Kip and Vance!

LFI tries to dump Trent out but Trent fights back! Claudio throws EuroUppers all over, Cassidy is back and he ROCKS Rush, but Kip CLUBS Cassidy! The brawling continue, Moxley knees away on Butcher! Vance goes after Yuta, Rush stomps Cassidy, then Rush pretends to kick Cassidy’s head to the crowd. Cassidy has a bloody spot on the back of his head but Rush throws body shots. Yuta goes after Blade and Claudio helps, but Butcher saves Blade. Cassidy fights off Rush but Dralistico clubs Cassidy. Moxley has Kip now, but here comes The Dark Order! Fans fire up as Evil Uno, Alex Reynolds & John Silver rush the ring!

But of course Vance stands in their way to protect Rush! But Trent throws Rush out! Rush goes through the middle rope, he’s still in this, but Vance realizes he’s alone! He fights his former friends 3v1 and the three are winning! Fans fire up as they mug Vance against ropes! Rush returns, he goes after Cassidy, but then the BCC go after the Dark Order because of their friendship with Hangman Page! Moxley ROCKS Uno, Uno whips Moxley! Moxley goes up but holds on! The Dark Order club away on the hands but Yuta & Claudio save Moxley! Claudio EuroUppers and kicks Uno! Vance fires off on Silver!

Cassidy is up top, and he CROSSBODIES, only to be caught by Uno and Claudio! They pop Cassidy up but Cassidy lands on his feet! And puts his hands in his- NO, the Superbad Squad clobber Cassidy! Claudio sees no problem with that, and he brawls with Vance while AEW goes picture in picture!

Claudio scoops Vance but Vance fights back. Vance throws hands, he ROCKS Claudio, then fires off forearms on Moxley! Claudio ROCKS Vance back! Silver EuroUppers Vance! Moxley ROCKS Vance! Vance hits Moxley back, they brawl, Vance BOOTS Moxley! Moxley comes back, but runs into a BIG back suplex! Vance ROCKS Claudio, CHOPS him, then CHOPS again! Rush CHOPS Yuta, Yuta CHOPS back! Trent helps Yuta go after Rush but Dralistico makes the save. Claudio and Moxley mug Vance, Blade throws Cassidy out! Cassidy holds on to skin the cat! But Blade is right on him again to DECK him!

Rampage returns to single picture as fans rally, and Cassidy dodges Blade to ORANGE PUNCH him! Blade wobbles, Cassidy throws him up and out, Cassidy ELIMINATES Blade! But then Kip TOSSES and  ELIMINATES Cassidy!! Just as Best Friends take one of the Superbad Squad, Mr. Superbad himself strikes back! But then Trent TOSSES and ELIMINATES Kip!! And then Cassidy goes after Kip himself! The Superbad Squad only has Butcher, and Best Friends have #JustTrent! Butcher CLOBBERS Trent, stomps him down, and the other factions brawl! Kip and Cassidy fight their way up to the stage, and Cassidy bowls Kip! Then TACKLES him!

Here comes SPANISH ANNOUNCE PROJECT! Which means they excuse themselves from the Spanish announce desk and head to the ring! Hopefully fans listening to the Spanish commentary aren’t upset Luther, Serpentico & Angelico are done talking. Moxley fireman’s carries Uno, but Uno holds ropes to stay in this! Luther whips Serpentico into Yuta and Dralistico to sandwich them! And then the same to Reynolds in the other corner! And then into Uno and Moxley! And then into Vance! Fans cheer but Serpentico is a ragdoll! Trent and Angelico brawl, Trent throws Angelico up and out! Trent stomps Angelico down and ELIMINATES him!

Well, Angelico makes his way back to the Spanish commentary table, it’s all on Serpentico and Luther. Silver fires off on Dralistico & Rush! SUPERKICK for Rush! Dralistico gets around, shoves Silver to ropes, but Silver holds ropes. Silver catches the Monkey Flip to TOSS Dralistico and ELIMINATE him! LFI is down to two, but Rush glares at Johnny Hungy! ROLLING ELBOW! And then a whip up and out, Rush ELIMINATES Silver! Dralistico & Jose mug Silver as Rush evens the score! But Uno CLUBS Rush! And CHOPS him! And CHOPS again! And CHOPS! Rush CHOPS, Uno CHOPS, repeat! Fans “WOO~” for the CHOP fight!

But then Uno pokes Rush in the eye! But Moxley hits a CUTTER! Moxley stands Uno up to run and SHOTGUN him into the ropes! Uno staggers, Moxley dumps Uno to the apron! Yuta keeps Reynolds back, Uno stands back up, but Moxley DROPKICKS and ELIMINATES Uno! That was just so Moxley could send a message to Hangman! Luther whips Claudio into a corner, but Claudio dodges to EuroUpper! Claudio TOSSES and ELIMINATES Luther! Team SAP only has one man left in SNAKEMAN! Claudio shrugs, but Butcher picks him up and puts him on the ropes! But then Mark Sterling tells everyone to hold on?

Smart Mark wants the music off so everyone can hear him. “Did you know that there is a law in Texas that says you cannot milk another man’s cow? Which is great news for the people of San Antonio, because that means no one will ever touch your wives! It’s illegal! Now win that money, boys!” Ari Daivari & The Varsity Athletes (Tony Nese & Josh Woods) drag Trent out under the ropes! Trent is still in this but he gets mugged! Moxley whips Reynolds up and out while Trent is sent into railing! Reynolds fights back but Moxley has a SLEEPER! Trent fades, but he manages to HOTSHOT Moxley away!

Daivari, Nese & Woods get in the ring to go after Yuta! Yuta elbows them away, then he CLUBS Reynolds! Reynolds falls, Yuta ELIMINATES him! The Dark Order now only has the Meat Man! Moxley whips Woods to ropes, Woods holds ropes to stop himself. Woods fires off on Butcher, Moxley actually helps him. Rush OVERHEAD Suplexes Yuta into buckles! Rush runs corner to corner, to hit the BULL’S HORNS! Rush TOSSES and ELIMINATES Yuta! But then Serpentico storms up on Rush to CHOP away! Those don’t bother Rush, Rush feeds Serpentico to Vance’s DISCUS LARIAT! Vance then TOSSES Serpentico to ELIMINATE Team SAP!

But here comes AR Fox & Top Flight! The Coldest Team in the Game and their high-flying friend get in, they GAMANGIRI Trent, GAMANGIRI again, then A-LIST LARIAT! Fox skins the cat to swinging dropkick Trent! Then Top Flight RIPCORD Trent into the CUTTER from Fox! They then go after whoever is around, Claudio throws Daivari up and out but Mark says, “WHOA! WHOA!” Daivari is safe and Mark says okay, and he walks away. Claudio BOOTS Daivari down and ELIMINATES him! The money behind Varsity Athletes is gone! Vance ROCKS Claudio with forearms, then he ROCKS Trent!

Fans rally as Moxley fights off Rush, but Vance goes after him! Moxley BOOTS Vance but Vance ROCKS Moxley! Woods is after Butcher, Vance ROCKS Claudio! Claudio tosses Rush up and out! Moxley BOOTS and ELIMINATES Vance! Fans love seeing that, and now LFI only has El Toro Blanco in play! Woods brawls with Fox, throws him up and out but Fox lands on the apron. Fox ROCKS Woods, springboards, but into a KNEE! Woods helps Nese fight off Top Flight! But Dante whips Nese up and out! Nese holds on, Dante keeps after him, but Woods goes after Dante! Woods then drags Darius up, but Dante helps his brother!

Dante TOSSES Woods up and out to ELIMINATE him! Nese HOTSHOTS Dante, he slingshots, but Darius SHOVSE him out onto Woods, Daivari and even Mark Sterling! Top Flight ELIMINATES Daivari & The Varsity Athletes! Trent and Butcher are on the apron, Trent reels Butcher in! APRON PILEDRIVER!! Butcher falls, Trent ELIMINATES the Superbad Squad! But Rush uses the BULL’S HORNS to ELIMINATE Trent and Best Friends with him! Rush calls out Claudio? Fans fire up as Rush wants the ROH World Champion! They get face to face, then the EuroUppers and CHOPS start going back and forth!

Claudio gets the edge with his uppercuts! But Rush knees low! And ROCKS Claudio! Rush fires up, but Claudio ducks the haymaker! Rush picks Claudio up but Claudio fights that! Claudio suplexes Rush over the ropes but Rush drags Claudio out to join him! Rush CHOPS, Claudio snarls. Claudio eggs Rush on, Rush CHOPS again! Rush CHOPS, Claudio fires off a flurry of forearms! Fans are thunderous as Claudio POSTS Rush, then bumps him off the crossbar! EUROUPPER! Rush falls and Claudio ELIMINATES him, no more LFI! Fox is on the apron but he ROCKS Mox! Fox slingshots, but Mox DECKS him and ELIMINATES him!

But then Top Flight rushes over to go after Moxley! Claudio goes after them, and the two teams stand off! Fans are thunderous since we just saw Moxley and Darius on Dynamite! The BCC and the Martins start firing off haymakers! Fans give a standing ovation, BECAUSE HANGMAN SLIDES IN!! Hangman goes after Moxley after keeping his promise to not help Dark Order in the match! The Cowboy is throwing hands, but security rushes out to stop him! Fans want to “Let Them Fight!” but this isn’t the time for that yet! Top Fight get involved, Moxley DECKS Darius! But Dante SHOTGUNS Moxley up and out to ELIMINATE him!!

Fans are going nuts as now it’s just Top Flight VS Claudio! And then Hangman goes out after Moxley some more!! Security rush in to stop him again! Moxley gets on the corner and LEAPS off!! Moxley bowls Hangman and security over!! Claudio CLOBBERS Darius, Dante springboards but into an UPPERCUT! Claudio roars and fans fire up with him! Claudio drags Dante up to gut wrench him. Darius staggers, Claudio kicks him and scoops him, too! Fans fire up but Top Flight escape together! They double kick then double suplex! But Claudio fights to lift them both up! Top Flight both end up on the apron!

Claudio ROCKS Dante, he ROCKS Darius, then he fires off on Darius more! But Dante BOOTS Claudio! Darius steps in, COMPLETE SHOT! Top Flight gets Claudio up, they both lift him, but he fights them off with haymakers! Fans rally behind Claudio but Top Flight double scoop! Claudio fights free with elbows now! Claudio gut wrenches and TOSSES Darius, but he stays safe on the apron! Dante staggers into a BOOT! Claudio fires up again and fans fire up with him! Claudio drags Dante up in a deadlift! Claudio fireman’s carries Dante, trophy lifts him, but Darius SUPERKICKS! Dante feeds Claudio to Darius’ ROLLING ELBOW!

Dante whips but Claudio reverses, only for Darius to help Dante go up and over Claudio! Then Dante helps Darius with the TORNADO DDT! Claudio flounders, Top Flight DOUBLE LARIAT Claudio up and out! But Claudio stays safe on the apron!! Fans are thunderous as Claudio’s one foot taps the floor! Top Flight runs in, Claudio HOTSHOTS Dante! Darius runs into a shoulder! Claudio is back in, but Dante uses Darius as a step, ANGEL DORADO IN MOTION! But Claudio catches Dante! Claudio swings Dante around but Darius SUPERKICKS Claudio! Darius then helps Dante sit back up to RANA Claudio up and out and ELIMINATE him! TOP FLIGHT & FOX WIN!!!

Winners: AR Fox & Top Flight (winners of the $300,000 cash prize)

What a massive win for the young trio! One hundred grand apiece, what will these fly boys spend it on?

 

Eddie Kingston & Ortiz are here!

Fans cheer as The Mad King & the man affectionately known as “Monkey” head to the ring. They’ve got beef with the House of Black that needs to be settled, but they get the mics here tonight. Ortiz borrows a fan’s Pitbull cutout and Kingston barks it up. Fans bark, too, and Kingston says, “Alright, to get serious real quick, lately we’ve been seeing the House of Black come out here, beat everybody up. Last time I saw them, they dropped my man like he was a b*tch. Like he didn’t deserve to get beat down, like a herb.

“Here’s the deal. House of Black, we sent the contract to you. Guess what? You didn’t sign it. I’m not gonna wait for you guys to shut the lights on and off, like we have a power outage problem or something like that. I wanna fight you guys now! Monkey wants to fight you guys now! Do you people wanna see us kick their asses or what?” The fans cheer for that! Kingston tells the House to get out here! “Hit the lights, do the creepy crap, let’s go!” Ask and you shall receive, for the lights go down! And then they come back up in all red, with Julia Hart on stage! And she points to the screen for the House of Black to speak.

Malakai Black sighs, and says, “Ever so perceptible, Eddie. However, all in due time. However, Eddie, I was thinking. If the enemy of my enemy is my friend, then if the friend of enemy is influenced by me, would he then be his enemy, too? Interesting, right?” The House steps away into the shadows, and both Ortiz and Kingston wonder what the hell they’re talking about. Is there a question of allegiance here? But then, who is whose enemy in all of this?

 

Backstage interview with Sammy Guevara & Daniel Garcia.

Renee Paquette is with the Spanish God & Dragonslayer to note that last week, Jericho said Garcia was to follow the lead of Sammy. What is his reaction to that decision? Sammy wants to speak but Garcia says they’re not doing this. Garcia is going to talk for himself. And if he’s keeping it real, he doesn’t like anything about Sammy. Not his hair, not the way he dresses, but… If Jericho thinks they should stick together, Garcia being the professional and team player here, he will give it his best effort. Wow, really? A professional? Sammy says, “You know what you are? You’re a professional tight ass.” Real tight. Garcia needs to loosen up.

Sammy has Renee switch spots with him so he can stand closer to Garcia. Sammy says, “You know what you need? I know what you need. You need a hug. Bring it in!” Sammy hugs Garcia but Garcia doesn’t like it. Sammy asks if he feels it, and Garcia says yes, he feels it. Sammy says the JAS is a family. As the New Year approaches, they’re going to do great things together! Sammy & Danny! Danny & Sammy! Merry Christmas, brother! Garcia says this is what he meant. But will the sibling rivalry turn into a dynamic duo as AEW enters 2023?

 

AEW TBS Championship Eliminator Match: Jade Cargill w/ The Baddies VS Vertvixen!

UNDEFEATED at 44-0 and counting, TBS still stands for #ThatBitchShow. But how long can it last? Will Jade go to 45-0? Or will she owe a title match in the New Year?

The bell rings and Vert circles with Jade. They tie up, Jade THROWS Vert down, and then taunts her. Jade drags Vert up, bumps her off buckles and then stomps her. Jade ROCKS Vert, CLUBS her, and brings Vert around to scoop and carry Vert before the SLAM! Jade flexes and fans cheer while AEW goes picture in picture.

Jade drags Vert up, CLUBS her down, then brings her up again. Jade scoops to SLAM Vert, looms over her, and then whips her to ropes. Jade ELBOWS Vert down, and then taunts her. Jade drags Vert up, TOSSES her, and soaks up the cheers and jeers. Jade does push-ups just to show off! Vert flounders in the corner, Jade storms up to stomp a mudhole into her! The ref counts, Jade lets off at 4, and then she drags Vert back up. Jade bumps Vert off buckles, gives her a EuroUpper, then brings Vert around into the ropes. Jade CHOKES Vert, lets off at 4, and she argues with the ref. Velvet CHOKES Vert! Leila swipes at her!

The Baddies get away with being bad and then Jade bumps Vert off buckles. Jade bumps Vert off more buckles, then CLUBS her down! Jade stands Vert back up to CLUB her again! And again! Jade whips Vert corner to corner hard and Vert bounces off buckles! Jade scuffs Vert, paces, then SLAPS Vert down, and Rampage goes to break.

The Rampage Holiday Bash returns as Jade digs her boots into Vert! The ref counts, Jade lets off at 4, and then she dribbles. Jade runs but Vert dodges the dunk! Vert runs to kick low! Vert whips but Jade blocks to reverse. Vert ducks ‘n’ dodges but Jade SUPERKICKS Vert! Jade kicks Vert, then SCISSOR KICKS her down! Vert staggers up, into the BOOT!! Cover, Jade wins!

Winner: Jade Cargill, by pinfall (denies Vertvixen a title match)

And that’s 45! Vert isn’t a challenger, but who will be next for Jade to run through?

 

Ruby Soho speaks.

“Tay! Last week was supposed to be the end of our story. I was supposed to close that chapter of my career and rid myself of you, like I’ve wanted to for so damn long. I beat you. And I was supposed to have my moment, I was supposed to enjoy it. But Anna Jay decided differently. So I’m getting a little tired of this numbers game. As much as I didn’t really wanna ask for help, I wanted to fight this fight on my own, I think I found the perfect person to fight this fight.” Willow Nightingale excitedly hops into frame! Fist bump? Ruby says they’ll work on that. But TayJay, they’re coming for ya! That happens for New Year’s Smash on Dynamite this Wednesday!

 

Wardlow speaks.

“Joe, I find it very comical that you claim to be the most dangerous man in the room, but are always attacking me from behind. I find it even more comical that you’re running around, calling yourself a king, when in fact the crown you took is not yours. Remember, Joe: you never tapped me out, you never pinned me. You haven’t beaten me! This Wednesday, you playing the king comes to an end.” The Maestro of Mayhem is ready, will he play a special Powerbomb Symphony for the Samoan Submission Specialist?

 

New Year, New Look!

AEW Dynamite will be live, January 4th, debuting an all new aesthetic! Will Dynamite still be explosive in 2023?

 

Alex Marvez and a cameraman hurry outside!

“Powerhouse” Hobbs is here! And he’s got someone pinned up against the wall! Hobbs says, “I’m taking everything!” and then he throws this man down to go after the cameraman! Who won’t Hobbs manhandle in his mission to take over AEW?

 

Mark Henry interviews tonight’s main eventers!

The World’s Strongest Man notes that last week, Max Caster was attacked from behind by Jeff Jarrett and company, and though Caster will be ringside, he is not cleared to compete. Even though Bowens has Daddy Ass, what is Bowens’ mindset going into tonight? But Sonjay Dutt says he’ll take it from here. “Last week, we took Max Caster out. And tonight, we’re gonna take out the rest of those yahoos! And did you hear my rap on Wednesday? Man, I buried those guys!” Jay Lethal says not only did they prove they’re better musicians than The Acclaimed, they will prove that they are better wrestlers, too!

Jarrett says that’s right, and he tells The Acclaimed to- Billy stops Jarrett there, and says, “Please, please, shut up.” Billy’s known Jarrett for over 20 years, and he knows how Jarrett plays this game. If you think Billy went soft, you’re sadly mistaken! He and Bowens are gonna show them all in just a minute. Bowens says that’s right, he and Billy will beat Jarrett’s “geriatric Kid Rock lookin’ ass all over Texas!” And they should do Bowens a favor and take Caster’s advice to listen. If they listen closely, they will hear San Antonio scream the one thing they’re all scared to admit: EVERYONE LOVES THE ACCLAIMED!

Well, it looks like there’s been enough talk. It’s time for the main event! Platinum Max may be sidelined, but will the Five Tool Player and Daddy Ass make sure “Triple J” never top the charts?

Anthony Bowens & Billy Gunn w/ Max Caster VS Jeff Jarrett & Jay Lethal w/ Sonjay Dutt & Satnam Singh!

Caster may not be cleared to compete but he still got cleared to rap! “Acclaimed on the mic, gotta make that known. Gonna send these dudes back to the Impact Zone! How they gonna hate on me when they’re rolling with the Not So Great Khali? Stomp you in the nuts ’til you’re out of it! I’m gonna shut you down in Texas like the power grid! Yo, we gonna have to drop it. Y’all made cuz we got titles like Popovich!” Spurs fans love that one! Bowens then says, “SAAAAN AAANTONIOOOOO~! The Acclaimed have arrived! SCISSOR ME, DADDY ASS~!” And they scissor finger!

The teams sort out and fans already sing, “OH~ Scissor Me Daddy~!” Bowens starts against Lethal, they circle, then tie up. They’re in a deadlock but Lethal finds a point of leverage to put Bowens in the corner. Lethal lets off, but then he sucker punches! Bowens CHOPS, Lethal haymakers, repeat! Bowens backs Lethal down with those CHOPS but Lethal knees low. Lethal whips, Bowens reverses but Lethal reverses to trip Bowens! Lethal steps through, Bowens kicks free once, but Lethal steps through again! Bowens turns that into a cradle, TWO! Bowens CHOPS but Lethal throws another hand, and they go back and forth again!

Lethal blocks a kick, slips around but Bowens ducks the haymaker to mule kick! Bowens front kicks, then runs, to LEG LARIAT BULLDOG! Cover, ONE!! Bowens drags Lethal over, fans rally up as he points to Billy, tag to Daddy Ass! But Lethal gets away to tag Jarrett! The Last Outlaw circles with the Ass Man and tie up. Jarrett pokes Billy in the eye! Jarrett throws hands, whips, and elbows Billy down! Jarrett CHOKES Billy, runs, and STRADDLE ATTACKS! Jarrett grins and struts but fans boo. Jarrett runs but Billy LARIATS! Billy bumps Jarrett off buckles, brings him corner to corner and bumps him again!

Billy suplexes Jarrett for a JACKHAMMER! Cover, TWO! Fans rally, Billy wrenches but Jarrett pokes eyes! Lethal tags in and goes up to leap, into a body shot! Billy drags Lethal over, tags in Bowens, and then whips Lethal for a body shot! Billy BOOTS Lethal, Bowens scoops Lethal, and Bowens SLAMS Lethal! Fans fire up as Bowens and Daddy Ass SCISSOR FINGER! They DOUBLE ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Fans rally as Bowens keeps Lethal from Jarrett but Lethal shoves Bowens away. Jarrett cheap shots Bowens in the back, but Bowens DECKS him for it! Lethal throws Bowens down, but Bowens avoids the elbow drop!

But Jarrett CLOBBERS Bowens on the outside! Jarrett grins and Sonjay talks trash while Rampage goes picture in picture!

The ref reprimands, everyone backs off of Bowens, but Billy helps Bowens up and in. Lethal stalks Bowens, stomps a leg, then drags Bowens up to toss him back out! Bowens hits hard by the ramp but Billy goes over to help him up again. Billy also tells Jarrett to back off with that chair! Jarrett does, Bowens gets in the ring but Lethal is right on him! Lethal stomps Bowens, bumps him off buckles, throws hands then digs his boot in! Sonjay talks trash as Lethal lets off. Jarrett gets cheap shots in! Caster protests but nothing can be done now. Lethal knees Bowens down, tags in Jarrett, and Jarrett stomps away.

Jarrett whips Bowens, Bowens sunset flips! TWO, Jarrett CLOBBERS Bowens! Tag back to Lethal and he covers, TWO! Lethal drags Bowens up, CLUBS him down, then brings him away from Billy. Lethal scoop SLAMS Bowens, covers, TWO! Lethal clamps on a chinlock to grind Bowens down! Bowens endures, fights up, and Caster rallies the fans. Bowens throws body shots, but Lethal knees low! And again! And again! Lethal tags Jarrett in, Triple J double whip, but Bowens reverses to send Lethal away! Jarrett RUSSIAN LEG SWEEPS! Cover, TWO! Jarrett drags Bowens up, bumps him off buckles, then whips him corner to corner hard!

Bowens bounces off buckles, but Jarrett shakes his head as fans rally up. Jarrett whips Bowens back the other way hard! Bowens again bounces off buckles, and Jarrett tells Billy to “SUCK IT!” The ref keeps Billy back, Jarrett whips Bowens to ropes and back drops him as Rampage returns to single picture! Tag to Lethal, Jarrett whips Bowens to ropes to kick low! Lethal runs in to SWINGING NECKBREAKER! Fans boo but Lethal soaks up all the heat. Cover, TWO! Bowens refuses to stay down but Lethal stomps him down! Lethal SLAPS Bowens, drags him up, and fans rally up. Lethal snap suplexes Bowens, covers, TWO!

Fans rally but Lethal clamps on with a chinlock. Bowens endures, fights up, but Lethal knees low and CLUBS him down! Lethal tells Billy to “SUCK IT!” but Bowens blocks the suplex! Lethal brings Bowens away but Bowens wrenches out to waistlock! Lethal switches that around, suplexes, but Bowens slips out to roll Lethal! TWO, and Lethal hits the LETHAL COMBINATION! Sonjay laughs and Lethal grins at Billy. Lethal covers, TWO! Lethal drags Bowens to another cover, TWO! Another, ONE!! Fans rally but Lethal drags Bowens away. Tag to Jarrett but fans chant “JARRETT SUCKS!” as he stomps Bowens.

Jarrett eggs the fans on, and he stomps Bowens around. Bowens stands up as the haymakers fly in! Jarrett runs, into an ELOBW! JAB! CHOP! SUPERKICK!! Fans fire up while both men are down! Bowens crawls his way over, but so does Jarrett! Hot tags to Lethal and Billy! Fans fire up as Daddy Ass CLOBBERS Lethal, CLOBBERS Jarrett, repeat! Billy TOSSES Jarrett out, brings Lethal in, but Satnam gets in the ring!? Billy runs to LARIAT Satnam back out of the ring!! Lethal handsprings, but into a waistlock! Billy ties Lethal up, THE ONE AND ONLY!! Cover, but Jarrett breaks it! Sonjay gets on the apron but Bowens DECKS him!

But Jarrett gets Bowens for THE STROKE!! Caster is furious, he ROCKS Jarrett! Billy gets Jarrett and TOSSES him! But Sonjay sneaks in! LOW BLOW!! LETHAL INJECTION!!! Cover, TRIPLE J WIN!

Winners: Jeff Jarrett & Jay Lethal, by pinfall

Triple J had to use every card in their hands to win this one, but they still won! Will it only be a matter of time before these #LethalOutlaws snatch away the tag titles? Or can Caster get cleared and help Bowens pull off a Critically Acclaimed comeback?


My Thoughts:

A great episode for Rampage that kept it pretty concise. Good, quick promo from Wardlow to hype his match with Samoa Joe, and good promo from Ruby and Willow to hype up a match with Tay Melo & Anna Jay. And while it was obvious Jade was going to win, it was a touch surprising that it went past a commercial break, even after the picture in picture. I didn’t detect saltiness from Red Velvet but I would hope she plays that up more. That story of The Baddies falling apart and Bow Wow being the reason Jade loses just needs to happen already. They’re probably doing these eliminator matches to push Jade closer to 50 wins before she loses, but they should’ve realized to do that much sooner.

Really good promo segment from Eddie, Ortiz and the House of Black. I had a feeling Malakai would plant the seeds of distrust in Eddie, and I have a feeling instead of Ortiz turning on Eddie to join House of Black, this is going to drive Eddie so crazy that he technically turns on Ortiz and that’s how they lose to the House. I also like how brief Hobbs’ segment was, but I wish he was beating up someone more recognizable. I have no idea who that guy was, I feel like I should, but I don’t. Hobbs should’ve been mugging The Wingmen or the Workhorsemen because at least I’ve seen those guys more regularly.

Good promo from Garcia and Guevara and that went about how I expected. Garcia did question the teaming given how different he and Guevara are, but Garcia is doing his best to accept it because Jericho suggested it. This fits Garcia given he defaulted back to the JAS when he questioned if he was pro-wrestler or sports entertainer. However, with Sammy trying to be overly chummy, this will surely sour Garcia’s attitude and we’ll see that internal conflict return. Hopefully this time they milk it and bring Garcia very close to being pro-wrestler, even if he doesn’t join Blackpool Combat Club specifically.

Great Casino Trios Royale, I like that they let it go to the last person of each team. We got great stuff out of all the stories in that match, like Best Friends against Superbad Squad, LFI against Dark Order, and Moxley taking out the Dark Order just to piss Hangman off. Hangman showing up after the Dark Order was eliminated was a smart move, and we definitely need to see that Unsanctioned grudge match already. And while a lot of fans wanted Claudio to win, Top Flight was the right choice. Claudio has a title, Yuta has a title, Moxley is Moxley, they don’t need $300,000, kayfabe or otherwise. This is a great win for Fox & Top Flight, and they can use this to springboard (no pun intended) into something big next year.

And of course, great promo from the main eventers, and a great main event from “Triple J” VS Bowens & Billy. I figured Triple J would cheat in all the ways they could cheat, and that Billy would take the fall. The Acclaimed will surely put those titles up against Triple J at some point before Revolution, and they will win, but maybe the tiebreaker is build up for Revolution, where Acclaimed win again.

My Score: 8.5/10


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Dynamite Results & Report! (3/22/23)

Independence is Dynamite!

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AEW Coverage Lasers

Dream matches, grudge matches, title matches, oh my!

The AEW World Tag Team Championships, Moxley VS Grayson, Hook VS Stokely under NO DISQUALIFICATIONS, and Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo, all on one night!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Six Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Darby Allin & Sting VS The Superbad Squad; Cassidy, Darby & Sting win.
  • AEW World Tag Team Championships: The Gunns VS Top Flight; The Gunns win and retain the titles.
  • No Disqualifications: Hook VS Stokely Hathaway; Hook wins.
  • Jon Moxley w/ Wheeler Yuta & Claudio Castagnoli VS Stu Grayson w/ The Dark Order; Moxley wins.
  • Toni Storm w/ The Outcasts VS Skye Blue; Storm wins.
  • Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo; Omega wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

There’s a medical emergency backstage!

Hangman Page is on the phone with someone while Brandon Cutler gets in the ambulance. Cutler tells Hangman to make sure someone’s with Nick, meaning MATT Jackson is in the ambulance! The ambulance drives away, and now Nick is loaded into a second! The Young Bucks were attacked before cameras were rolling, Don Callis calms Kenny Omega down, and Hangman rides with Nick. Omega has his main event match with AAA rival El Hijo del Vikingo, but who went after his best friends?

 

Six Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Darby Allin & Sting VS The Superbad Squad!

Freshly Squeezed is still a champion, as he retained the now AEW International Championship in Canada. But now, a familiar foe is rearing his Superbad head once again. Kip Sabian is bringing Butcher & Blade with him to go after Cassidy while his Best Friends are down and out. But will Cassidy’s new pals be more than enough to turn back the Superbad Squad?

The trios sort out and Cassidy starts against Kip. Fans rally and chant for “FRESHLY SQUEEZED!” but Kip copies Cassidy putting his hands up. Cassidy rushes in, Kip gets around and waistlocks to headlock. Cassidy powers out, headlocks back, but Kip powers out, only for Cassidy to slip around and headlock again. Kip powers out, things speed up and Cassidy arm-drags, but Kip cartwheels through! Kip mocks Cassidy, Cassidy rushes in but Kip dumps him out. Kip fakes Cassidy out with an Arabian Press, then he mocks putting his hands up again. Cassidy rushes back in, dodges Kip now, and sends him out!

Cassidy mocks Kip, then puts his hands up. To put his hands in his pockets! Kip rushes in, Cassidy dodges and SHOTGUNS! Cassidy kips up and fans fire up, but Kip scrambles away to tag in Butcher. Butcher eggs Cassidy on, but fans cheer as Cassidy tags in STIIIING! The Icon steps to Andy Williams and Andy talks trash. Butcher swings a forearm, but Sting just brushes it off! Butcher throws another forearm, but then Sting counter punches! And back hands! And punches again! Sting kicks low, ROCKS Butcher, then fires off in the corner. But Butcher claws at the eyes! The fans boo but Butcher BITES Sting’s forehead!

Butcher BLASTS Cassidy and Darby, then mocks Sting’s howl. Butcher runs, but misses the splash! Sting runs to hit the STINGER SPLASH! Fans fire up as Sting snapmares and gets the legs! But Blade and Kip attack! Fans boo but Darby and Cassidy fight them off! Kip throws Cassidy out, Blade scoops and dumps Darby out, then the Superbad Squad coordinates. Butcher & Blade reel Sting in, Butcher tags Kip, and then they DOUBLE SUPLEX Sting! Kip goes up the corner, but Sting slow rolls away, a la Cassidy! Speaking of Cassidy, he and Darby go after Butcher & Blade on the outside! Fans fire up but Kip is frustrated.

Kip storms over to another corner and climbs up again, but Sting slow rolls the other way! Fans fire up, Darby reaches out and makes the tag! Kip leaps, Darby gets under to SLAP, HEADBUTT, roll and CODE RED! Cover, TWO! Kip is still in this and Penelope Ford gets on the apron! The ref reprimands her while Darby whips Kip. Kip reverses, Darby goes up the ropes, but Blade trips him up! Darby hits the mat hard, Kip stomps away, and fans boo while AEW goes picture in picture.

Kip drags Darby up while Butcher sends Cassidy into barriers! Kip hits a FISHERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO! Tag to Blade, the squad mugs Darby, then they send him into a corner. Blade runs in to CHOP! And CHOP! And then snapmare to PENATLY KICK! Cover, TWO! Blade drags Darby over, tags in Butcher, and they DOUBLE HEADBUTT Darby down. Butcher drags Darby up to CHOP him back down. Butcher drags Darby up to bump him off buckles, then he tags Kip. Kip stomps Darby, then taunts Sting. The ref reprimands Kip but that allows Blade to CHOKE Darby! Kip howls, tags Blade, and the mugging continues.

Blade brings Darby up to ROCK him with a forearm. Blade brings Darby around to whip him to ropes, to then POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Tag to Butcher, he stomps Darby, then ties up the legs. Darby throws hands from below, but Butcher still drags him into a TEXAS CLOVERLEAF! Darby endures, claws his way around, but even Penelope taunts him with shouting, “TAP! TAP!” Dynamite returns to single picture as Darby crawls towards his corner, only for Blade to swing him out into a POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO! Darby survives but Butcher tags Kip. Kip drags Darby up to wrench an arm and whip. Darby uses that to BLAST Butcher & Blade!

Kip runs in, blocks Darby’s boot and spins Darby around to back suplex. Darby lands on his feet, but his knee jams! Darby crawls and scrambles, but Kip drags him back! Kip catches Darby, Blade trips Sting! Blade sends Sting into barriers! Darby sunset flips Kip, Kip stays up so Darby lets him go to hot tag Cassidy! Fans are thunderous as Cassidy eggs Kip on! Kip rushes Cassidy but gets a buckle bump! Cassidy goes up top, and CROSSBODIES! Cassidy keeps moving, he ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl DDT! And kip up! Fans are thunderous again as Cassidy gives Kip those “devastating” kicks! But then Butcher runs in to CLOBBER Cassidy!

Fans boo and the ref reprimands, but Butcher brings Cassidy up. Butcher lifts but Cassidy fights the bomb! Blade gets in, they DRAG THE LAKE!! Kip covers, TWO!! Cassidy survives and Kip is furious! Kip howls, runs and CANNONBALLS! Fans boo but Kip soaks it all up. Kip is too busy having fun, he misses Cassidy tag STIIIIING! Sting walks up to give those same “devastating” kicks! Kip thinks it’s Cassidy, and turns around into quite the surprise. Sting “beats” his chest, Kip swings, but into a LARIAT! Sting really fires up, and he rallies on the Superbad Squad! Kip springboards, but Sting catches him! SCORPION DEATHLOCK!!

Ford freaks out, Blade gets up and throws hands, but Sting doesn’t flinch! Butcher adds on, the 2v1 is too much and Kip gets free. But Darby returns to fire off on Butcher & Blade! Butcher blocks one, CLUBS Darby and then hoists Darby up. Darby BOOTS Blade, BITES Butcher’s hand, then runs to DOUBLE COFFIN SPLASH! Butcher & Blade bail out but Darby builds speed, into Kip’s body shot! Kip avoids Orange’s punch, to suplex, STUN-DOG MILLIONAIRE! Then Cassidy DIVES to take out Blade! Darby hops up to THROWBACK STUNNER on Kip, then he DIVES into Butcher!

Sting has Kip in the dragon sleeper, and fans are thunderous for the SCORPION DEATH DROP!! Cover, Sting’s team wins!

Winners: Sting, Darby Allin & Orange Cassidy

A huge win for the unlikeliest of trios, and Cassidy adorns Sting with the sunglasses! As for Darby, he is looking at the Double or Nothing banner. The Relentless One wants at MJF and the gold, will he be living it up in Las Vegas?

 

AEW shares backstage footage from last week.

After having his “Re-Bar-Mitzvah” interrupted by Darby Allin, Sammy Guevara and “Jungle Boy” Jack Perry, it was obvious Maxwell Jacob Friedman was mad. He curses up a storm, then says he is the world champion! But Darby Allin says the world title means much more than money and fame. It is him being him. And Jack Perry, for himself, his family, and everyone who supported him all this time, he is going to become champion on his own. Sammy says that the world title is his destiny! He said so since episode ONE of Dynamite that he is going to be world champion. But MJF says that’s not how it works! You don’t waltz up to the champ and call your shot, you EARN it!

MJF has beaten Darby, Sammy and JB once each in 1v1 competition in their AEW careers, and he tells them they have to become #1 contender. Good luck trying, because all three of them SUCK! Sammy says he’ll win as many matches as it takes to get that belt off MJF. JB says that you can check the record books. He’s already won more matches than any of them. Darby says he’s beaten Sammy and he’s beaten JB, so he will stop at nothing to make sure that MJF is no longer champion. Who of these three Young Pillars of AEW will be THE one that challenges MJF at Double or Nothing?

 

AEW takes a closer look at tonight’s main event dream match.

Excalibur narrates that, “In 2021, there was no one hotter in professional wrestling than Kenny Omega. Known as ‘The Belt Collector,’ Omega won championships around the world, including in Mexico, where he won the AAA Mega Championship. At the same time, El Hijo del Vikingo was quickly establishing himself as one of the premier luchadors in all of Mexico. A match was made for December 2021: Vikingo, Omega, for the first time ever for the AAA Mega Championship. Unfortunately, Omega’s injuries at Full Gear were so severe, they required surgery, keeping him out of action for nearly a year.

“Now, with Omega back at 100%, the dream match is on for tonight. Kenny Omega, El Hijo del Vikingo, live!” Who will come out as truly the best today?

 

AEW World Tag Team Championships: The Gunns VS Top Flight!

They may not be the Young Bucks, the Lucha Brothers or the Hardy Boyz, but Austin & Colten are the brother tag team reigning over AEW. But will they soon find out they are not nearly as good as they think they are? Or will the Gunns cause the Coldest Tag Team in the Game to melt down?

The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see who is really the better brother duo!

The teams sort out, Austin starts against Dante, and Independence taunts the “ASS~ BOYS!” Austin tunes that out, knuckle locks with Dante, and then he CHOPS! Austin goes up and up, but then says no no no. Austin hops down, swings on Dante, but misses! Dante knuckle locks and CHOPS, then he goes up and up and FLYING ARM-DRAGS! Dante kips up and fans fire up! Austin tags Colten, but Dante arm-drags Colten down! Tag to Darius, the Martins double whip and speed things up, to then DROPKICK Colten down! Austin runs in, but into a DROPKICK! The Gunns regroup, but the Martins double clothesline them up and out!

Fans fire up as Dante says they’re getting those belts. The “ASS~ BOYS!” regroup and Colten slides back in. Tag to Austin, he and Dante circle again, and Austin gets around to shove Dante to ropes. Dante BLASTS Colten before the cheap shot! Dante then goes up and over Austin, only for Austin to pull hair! The ref reprimands, but misses Colten HOTSHOT Dante down! Fans boo as Austin stomps and Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Austin whips Dante out of the ring, then taunts Darius to distract the ref. Colten stomps away on Dante! Colten puts Dante in before anyone notices, and Austin bumps Dante off buckles. Tag to Colten, he stomps Dante, but lets off as the ref reprimands. Colten stomps some more, he and Austin taunt Independence and Darius, then Colten drags Dante up. Colten DECKS Dante, then mocks the fans. Colten ROCKS Dante, ROCKS him again, then suplexes. Cover, TWO! Colten stays between the Martin brothers, drags Dante over and bumps him off buckles. Tag to Austin, he stomps Dante now, then digs his boots in.

The ref reprimands but Austin mocks the fans rallying for Dante. Austin lets off and Colten CHOKES Dante! Colten lets off Dante before he gets caught, and Austin tags Colten in. Colten drags Dante up, whips him to ropes, and the Gunns body shot, knee lift and LARIAT! Cover, TWO! Colten stays between the Martins again, drags Dante up and whips him to the corner. Colten runs in but Dante dodges the splash! Austin tags in and hurries to stop Dante. Austin shoves Dante down, but Dante fakes Austin out to go under! Austin still grabs a leg, tags Colten back in, and the Gunns double back suplex! But Dante lands on his feet!

Dynamite returns to single picture, Dante goes over Austin, over Colten, and tags in Darius! Darius rallies on the Gunns and fans fire up! Darius hits an atomic drop on Austin, then LARIATS Colten! Mule kick for Austin, and Darius whips him at Colten. Austin reverses but Darius uses that to UPPERCUT Colten! Austin runs back in, but is sent into Colten! Darius uses Austin to get up and ENZIGURI Colten! Darius then GERMAN SUPLEXES Austin, and STANDING SPANISH FLIES Colten! Cover, TWO! Fans rally as Darius drags Colten up. Tag to Dante, Top Flight double whip, but Colten ducks and tags Austin!

Darius leaps to CROSSBODY Colten! Austin runs in, but into a hall nelson SLAM! cover, TWO!! Dante keeps cool, he goes to the corner, but Colten grabs his leg! Dante kicks Colten away, Darius DIVES onto Colten to hit him into railing! Dante GAMANGIRIS Austin, goes up and up and NOSEDIVES!! Cover, Colten breaks it!! Fans boo but Colten was within the rules. Wait, is that THE KINGDOM!? Mike Bennett & Matt Taven are mugging Darius over their ROH losses! But Dante FLIES out onto them! Direct hit and fans fire up! Dante hurries back up, springboards again, but Austin gets under!

Colten gets in, Dante runs into a 3:10 TO YUMA!! Cover, the Gunns win!

Winners: The Gunns, by pinfall (still AEW World Tag Team Champions)

Fans boo that the Gunns win, but Darius is pissed at The Kingdom! Darius chases off Mike & Matt, will Top Flight get revenge in ROH? As for the Gunns, they hear FTR coming! Fans fire up again as Dax Harwood & Cash Wheeler step out on stage with mics in their hands! Colten gets a mic to have the FTR music stop. Colten says no one wants to hear that song and no one wants to see FTR. Fans boo because they disagree. FTR says they’re not here to fight. They’re here to talk business. Well, no one wants to hear you talk! The Gunns don’t like or respect FTR. And guess what? FTR are LOSERS! They lost three sets of belts, and lost to the Gunns!

There is nothing FTR can say or offer them to get a rematch. NOTHING! Nothing? So like, if they said they’ll never challenge the Gunns again for those titles should they lose- NO! Do you not hear what Austin is saying, “you hillbillies? NOTHING! There’s NOTHING! What do you have to offer?! NOTHING!!” Then if the Gunns wanna prove their first win wasn’t a fluke, should they win against FTR again, FTR will never tag together in AEW again. Oh, the break up? So heartbreaking! LOOK AT HIS FACE! NOTHING!! Okay, okay. Dax says if FTR can’t beat the Gunns to win the AEW World Tag Team Championships, FTR will just quit AEW.

Fans boo, but it seems that got through to the Gunns. If the Gunns beat FTR again, FTR leaves AEW forever? Yes, that’s what Dax said. Well, in that case, deal! The Gunns and FTR shake on it, but then Gunns literally spin in FTR’s faces! The Gunns run for it, but the match is coming either way. Will the “ASS~ BOYS!” get their asses kicked? Or will they be the team that banishes FTR from AEW?

 

Backstage interview with Jade Cargill, Leila Grey & Mark Sterling.

Renee Paquette is with the AEW TBS Champion, her Last Baddie Standing and her legal representation. Renee says that Taya Valkyrie is All Elite now, and she has her eye on the TBS title. What is Jade’s reaction to that? “Renee, cut the sh*t. We had this Taya girl come in and interrupt my moment to answer an open challenge that was already closed, baby girl. And then, had the audacity to use my finisher. Mark, tie this up.” Sterling has a document, it is a Cease & Desist order. This will be sent to Taya Valkyrie, telling Taya that she is no longer allowed to use the chicken wing facebuster, which is also Jade’s move, as her finisher.

Leila says that she should deliver this document to Taya personally, this Saturday on Rampage. Because she has a few words of her own for Taya. So that’s an official challenge? Yes. Welcome to #ThatBitchShow. Will La Wera Loca have a jaded response to this frivolous lawsuit?

 

No Disqualifications: Hook VS Stokely Hathaway!

An injured arm turned into a suspension turned into a settlement turned into a high stakes bet that The Firm lost, and now it has resulted in this match. And though Ethan Page, Matt Hardy, Isiah Kassidy, Lee Moriarty & “Big Bill” Morrissey see Stokely off, they can’t stay per the stipulations of the bet. As the introduction says, “He’s not as large as the men he represents, he has the heart of a lion and the wisdom of an owl.” But will any of that help him defeat The Cold-Hearted Handsome Devil?

As Hook makes his entrance, Stokely grabs the mic to say, “Whoa, whoa, whoa! I’ve got some breaking news! I spoke to Dr. Simpson (he means Sampson) earlier, and he said I am not medically cleared to compete. I know, I know. I wanted to so bad. And I would also, what a coinky-dink, announce that I am retiring.” What? Stokely thanks all 12 of his fands, God bless! Justin, here, doctor’s note. Make it official. Justin takes the note, and it reads, “He is SICK.” Justin says that with all due respect, that’s a receipt for Wingstop. The ref RIPS the receipt! And the bell rings! Fans fire up and Hook is ready, so Stokely bails!

Stokely runs around the ring, out to the crowd, but Hook pursues! Fans fire up as Hook chases Stokely down, drags him back, CLUBS him, then brings him over to KNEE and TOSS! Stokely ends up at ringside again and fans are thunderous! Hook stalks Stokely, Stokely runs in to UPPERCUT, but Stokely bounces off of Hook! Stokely scurries away, gets back up, and runs in, but into a leg capture! EL CAMINO to the floor! Fans fire up as Hook drags Stokely up, puts him in the ring, and then looks under the ring. Fans fire up more, because here comes a SPARE GUARD RAIL! Hook puts that in the ring while the Firm can only watch.

Hardy tries to calm the group down, Stokely can take care of himself with things getting “hardcore.” Ethan says no he can’t, they didn’t practice any of the hardcore stuff! Stokely bails out again but Hook puts the railing in a corner. Hook drags Stokely up but Stokely BLASTS Hook with the fire extinguisher! Fans boo but Stokely gets a chair! Stokely smacks the steps a couple times, he says, “I’m not a killer, but don’t push me! That’s Tupac.” Stokely hurries in, fans rally up, and Stokely swings, but Hook blocks! Hook BOOTS Stokely, then SMACKS him on the back! And again! And again! And again!

Hook throws the chair aside, Stokely is barely moving! But Hook drags Stokely up to EL CAMINO onto the railing! The railing BENDS! Hook drags Stokely off the railing, covers, but then pulls him up at TWO! Hook wants REDRUM!!! Stokely is OUT, Hook wins!

Winner: Hook, by submission

The FTW Champion could’ve ended it sooner, but he chose to teach Stokely a lesson: Do not get on Hook’s bad side. Hardy says Ethan must avenge Stokely! Ethan can beat Hook! Hardy is gonna get a match made right now! All Ego is ready, but will he be ready when they #SendHook?

 

Adam Cole is here!

Fans fire up as the Undisputed One heads to the ring. Naturally, everyone joins in on the “BOOM!” and “ADAM COLE BAYBAY!” Cole gets the mic and says, “Wow. Hey, hey, I think I know the answer to this, but who’s ready for Storytime with Adam Cole, baybay?” Everyone cheers! Cole continues with, “Seven days. We are just seven days away from me making my in-ring return here in AEW. And listen, I know I’ve talked a ton about my struggles and what I went through, but as far as how I’m feeling right now? Guys, I feel freaking great. I have never been more ready, never been more prepared, to get back in this ring, doing what I love, and that is wrestle for AEW.”

Fans are fired up, and Cole knows everyone has questions. “The biggest one being: Who is my opponent going to be on March 29th?” Fans echo, “Who? Who? Who?” Cole starts to speak, but here comes Daniel Garcia! Fans boo as Red Death has the mic to say, “Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Who’s ready for Storytime with Daniel Garcia, baybay?” Garcia knows Cole’s been gone awhile, so here’s an update on a few things. Fans tell Garcia to STFU already but Garcia says since Cole’s been gone, Garcia’s become a real veteran in AEW. All the boys in the back respect him so much that he is a locker room leader!

Fans boo more but Garcia says as locker room leader, it is his duty to come out here to not only welcome Cole back, but to put him in his place, too. Garcia says Cole may not remember, but here’s an update on what Garcia’s been doing the last nine months while Cole was home, “playing stupid video games on Twitch.” Cole smirks but allows it. Brody King: beat him! Ricky Starks: beat him! Bryan Danielson: Garcia beat him, too. Garcia’s main-evented more AEW programming over the past year than anyone else on the roster! Garcia is the lifeblood that pumps through this company. And he’s to respect Cole? To welcome Cole back? Where’s Garcia’s warm welcome?

Where is Garcia’s respect when he’s been here, been doing this, and proved himself as one of the best pro-wrest- Oops. Freudian slip there? Garcia corrects himself, “Sports entertainers on the planet today!” That’s what Garcia is! So what makes Cole so special? “What makes me special? When they ring the freakin’ bell, that’s what makes me special! That’s what makes m e special.” Cole admits he likes Garcia. Garcia is really, really good. And some day, he could be leading the charge in AEW. The problem is the company he keeps.

“The Jericho Appreciation Society, they’ve done a great job of giving you this false sense of security. This overconfidence, which sometimes is good, and sometimes is bad. But let me remind you, even me not wrestling for nine months, I am still Adam Cole Baybay. I am a multi-time world champion. I have traveled the globe, fought and beat some of the very best! As a matter of fact, while I was sitting at home for nine months, I was wondering if I’d ever get the chance to wrestle again, hoping, praying, willing to do anything for a second chance. And looks like I found that second chance.”

Fans fire up and Cole says if Garcia is crazy enough to want the match, then dammit, he’s on! Adam Cole VS Daniel Garcia, first-time-ever, next week on Dynamite! But Cole will remind Garcia of something: “This is not just my return match; this is a statement. It’s a statement to the entire locker room that one of the best damn pro-wrestlers on the planet is BACK, baybay.” Fans are fired up for “ADAM COLE! ADAM COLE!” Cole hopes Garcia realizes what he’ sin for. Because Cole promises next week will be a great night. A great night for Cole, for the fans, but for Garcia… Not so much. “See you next week, Garcia. BOOM.”

Cole is ready, Garcia is ready, but will the Dragonslayer stay a great sports enner-tay-ners? Or will the pro-wrestler in him rise to the surface against one of the greatest pro-wrestlers alive today?

 

Alex Marvez is outside The Elite’s locker room.

Marvez can hear a conversation going on inside, and he steps inside. Callis and Omega are talking, and Callis wants Marvez to hold on. What is Omega’s concern here? Omega’s concern is that his best friends left in an ambulance! He should’ve gone with them! Callis says he sent Cutler and Nakazawa with them. Omega has a match tonight! Hear Callis out. He’s a glass half full kind of guy. Injuries happen, but hear him out. The Bucks going to the hospital might’ve been the best thing for Omega and Callis. It allows for focus! Omega is in a singles match, the God of Pro-Wrestling is back! “Those kids will be fine in a few months.”

Callis now has Marvez join in. “Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo is gonna blow the roof off! The God of Pro-Wrestling is BACK, and it starts tonight on Dynamite! Now get out.” Marvez throws this back to ringside, but is Callis only thinking of his benefit, not Kenny’s?

 

Jon Moxley w/ The Blackpool Combat Club VS Stu Grayson w/ The Dark Order!

The Maniac, along with Claudio Castagnoli & Wheeler Yuta, have torn into the Dark Order from Silver to Reynolds to Evil Uno. They did all that to anger Hangman Page, but they’ve also angered #PlayerTwo! Moxley may be #ForgedByCombat, but will he survive someone born and bred for combat?

The bell rings and Stu RAMS Moxley into a corner! Fans fire up as Stu fires off on Moxley but lets off as the ref counts. Moxley turns things around to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP! Moxley pie faces Stu, but Stu turns things around to CHOP back! Stu stalks Moxley to another corner, KNEES him and CLUBS him, then stalks him to a third corner. Moxley kicks low, ROCKS Stu with a forearm, then another, then digs his boots in. The ref counts, Moxley steps off at 4, then Moxley drags Stu up to headlock takeover. Stu keeps his shoulders up, the Dark Order coaches him up but Moxley gets a knuckle lock cover. TWO as Stu gets his left arm up.

Moxley pushes the hand down, covers, TWO as Stu gets the right arm up. Moxley pushes that arm down again, covers, ONE as Stu gets his left arm back up. Stu fights to his feet but Moxley kicks low. Moxley headlocks, Stu powers out but Moxley RAMS him! Moxley runs, but Stu RAMS him! Moxley runs in, clips Stu but is sent out of the ring. Stu hurries out after Moxley, Moxley throws a chair! Stu avoids it, ROCKS Moxley and puts him in the ring. Moxley kicks back, but Stu RANAS! Stu fires forearms, CHOPS Moxley in the corner, then throws knees. Stu whips corner to corner, Moxley reverses and avoids the up ‘n’ over!

Moxley reels Stu in for a SAIDO! Stu staggers up but then flops out to the apron. Moxley runs to BLAST Stu off and to the barriers! Moxley flips Stu off while Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Yuta & Claudio taunt Stu as the ring count climbs. The Dark Order coaches Stu up and he gets in the ring at 5 of 10, but Moxley is right on him. Stu throws a forearm, then another, and another, and another! But Moxley ROCKS Stu with just one! Stu falls over and Claudio yawns. It seems this isn’t competitive enough for the Swiss Superman. Moxley has the legs, he stomps Stu in the stomach, then ties the legs up. But Stu fights back with fists! Moxley still powers Stu into the TEXAS CLOVERLEAF! Stu endures as Moxley sits deep, and he reaches out to the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Moxley lets off at 4.

Moxley drags Stu up to CHOP, but Stu CHOPS back! Stu fires forearms, whips, and DROPKICKS Moxley! Moxley goes to a corner, Stu is after hm with a whip, but Moxley reverses to clothesline! Moxley then brings Stu out to X-PLEX! Moxley paces around, the BCC applauds, but the Dark Order coaches Stu. Moxley reels Stu in, lifts him, and hooks the legs to hit the GOTCH PILEDRIVER! Cover, TWO!! Stu is still in this, but Moxley has the knuckle locks back. Dynamite returns to single picture as Moxley rains down the DRAGON STOMPS! Cover, TWO!! Stu hangs tough again, but Moxley just taunts him.

Fans rally, Stu rises, and Moxley KICKS him in the chest! And KICKS him again! Moxley eggs Stu on, then KICKS him more! Moxley SLAPS Stu! Stu snarls and stands up to fire off forearms! Stu whips, Moxley reverses but Stu CLOBBERS him! Stu dodges, tilt-o-whirls and REVERSE DDTS! Then he rains down HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! Fans fire up as Stu gives Moxley a taste of his own medicine! And then the SIDE EFFECT! SPRINGBOARD MARIPOSA! Cover, TWO!! Moxley survives and Stu grows frustrated. Stu hurries up a corner, but Yuta distracts! Fans boo but the Dark Order storm up on the BCC!

Stu decides to change course, he ARIHARA MOONSAULTS onto Yuta & Claudio! But Moxley DIVES onto Stu! Moxley puts Stu in the ring, hurries after him, but Stu BOOTS Moxley down! Stu hurries back up top, for the 450 SPLASH!! Cover, TWO!! Moxley survives again and Stu is shocked! But Stu slashes the throat and drags Moxley up. Torture rack, but Moxley slips off right into the BULLY CHOKE!! Stu endures, but he’s turning red! Moxley shifts to the facelock to throw in KNEE after KNEE! Then he shifts to the REAR NAKED CHOKE! But Stu fights up to his feet! Fans fire up but Stu is fading again!

But Stu is still on his feet, and he revives! BACKPACK CANNONBALL!! Both men crash into buckles and Stu is free! Fans are thunderous again and Moxley sputters back to his feet. Moxley brings Stu up, but Stu slips out of the underhooks! PELE!! Moxley falls down and the BCC coach him up. Stu goes back to a corner, climbs back up top, but Moxley ROCKS him first! Moxley climbs, CLUBS away on Stu, then CLAWS Stu’s back. Moxley HEADBUTTS Stu, brings him up into underhooks! SUPER DEATH RIDER!! Cover, Moxley wins!!

Winner: Jon Moxley, by pinfall

The Dark Order hurry into the ring and Moxley backs off, there won’t be any extracurriculars here. But will the Dark Order ever get payback on the mean SOBs in the BCC?

 

Backstage interview with Ricky Starks.

Renee says she can feel the frustration coming off The Absolute. The back ‘n’ forth with him and Juice Robinson, where do they stand? You tell him! Starks is “sick and tired of talking back and forth. No action, all talk.” Starks doesn’t wanna stand around, take time off his vacation, just to say Juice, he doesn’t like that you attacked him from behind. That’s cool and all, but whatever! How about this, though? Saturday Night Rampage, Starks is done talking. If Juice wants to face him man to man, then he can find Starks on Rampage! If not, just stop! Starks is over it, he is so sick of it! This is the craziest thing he’s been a part of his whole life!

Starks is issuing the open challenge to Juice. If Juice accepts it or not, is a man or not, Starks doesn’t give a damn anymore. The Absolute will be waiting, but will the Booster oblige?

 

AEW presents an all-new episode of QTV!

QT Marshall says great job last week in their debut, keep the “credibility train” rolling. CHOO-CHOO~! He needs scoops! Harley Cameron says she actually has discovered a “hot new prospect.” Goes by the name of Rey Fenix. And actually, here’s some footage. Hobbs POUNCING Fenix into buckles int heir TNT title match, and the spinebuster, and the Town Business. Everyone has a laugh, and QT says, “Imagine being in the Lucha Brothers, and your own lucha brother doesn’t come out to help you.” Aaron Solo says there is definitely some miedo! Then he laughs while also puffing mouth spray…?

QT asks who the hecc is Alex Abrahantes? Harley says Alex should work on his “character development.” Speaking of, how about Solo stealing Wardlow’s identity and freezing all of his accounts? Oopsie~! Yeah, Wardlow’s gonna lose his house and car, too! And Solo hacked into some observer’s accounts, started this whole thing about hotels. HAHA! QT just got a call from Hobbs. This Saturday on Rampage, another Open Challenge for the TNT title! Can’t wait to see who is the next chapter in the Book of Hobbs. Well, wait no longer! PENTA wants payback for Fenix as he answers the call! Will Hobbs be the one with some fear?

 

Toni Storm w/ The Outcasts VS Skye Blue!

The Lightning From Down Under has been striking down “spoiled rookies” again and again, but in the Dark. Will she do so again in the spotlight of Dynamite? Or will Skye roll the Storm away?

The bell rings and Storm BLASTS Skye with a forearm! Then she stomps a mudhole into Skye in the corner! The ref counts, Storm lets off but she grins and soaks up the heat. Soho & Saraya mock Skye, then Storm bumps her off buckles., Skye elbows back, fires forearms in return, and the fans fire up! But Storm knees low! Storm whips Skye, Skye kicks back! Skye ROCKS Storm again and again, but Storm shoves her away. Skye comes back, spins Storm for a KNEE SMASH and a DROPKICK! Storm bails out, fans fire up and Skye goes to the apron! FLYING RANA! Fans fire up with Skye but Saraya is mad.

Skye puts Storm in the ring, climbs up the corner, but Storm ROCKS her! Skye falls to the apron, then Storm HIP ATTACKS Skye to the floor! Storm distracts the ref, allowing Soho & Saraya to stomp away on Skye! Fans boo but the Outcasts get away with it! Saraya says, “This is OUR house!” Storm goes out to fetch Skye, and RAMS her into the apron. Storm CHOPS Skye against the post, then bumps her off the other. Storm CHOPS Skye again! Saraya says do it again! Storm puts some stank on this one, but Skye ducks, so the chop hits POST! Saraya & Soho panic as Storm clutches her fingers! Skye then runs in, but Storm dodges so Soho gets DECKED!

Storm CLOBBERS Skye from behind while the ring count climbs. Storm refreshes the ring count, Saraya shouts at Skye, and Storm CHOPS Skye again. Storm stalks Skye around the way as Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Storm drags Skye around to snap suplex her to the floor! Storm flexes, perhaps taunting Jamie Hayter wherever she’s watching this from, and then she goes back for Skye. Storm puts Skye in the ring, flexes more, then drags Skye up. Storm whips Skye to ropes, BOOTS her down, covers, ONE! Cover again, TWO! Another cover, TWO!! Skye is still in this but Storm clamps on with a full nelson. Storm leans on the hold, thrashes Skye around, but Skye endures. Skye fights up, but Storm throws her down by her hair! The ref reprimands but Storm just stalks Skye. Storm kicks Skye around, has her in the corner, and digs her boot in.

The ref counts, Storm stomps but lets off at 4. Storm drags Skye up to snap suplex! Storm grins then stalks Skye. Storm drags Skye up to snap suplex again! Storm flexes more, stalks Skye to another corner, then wrenches her hair to TOSS her across the way! The ref reprimands but Storm just wrenches hair and TOSSES Skye again! Dynamite returns to single picture as Storm soaks up the heat. But Skye shoves Storm down! And then TOSSES Storm by her hair! And again! Skye fires up, runs corner to corner, but Storm puts her on the apron. Skye ROUNDHOUSES! Skye climbs up, to CROSSBODY!

Fans fire up, Skye keeps moving, she ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl headscissor! Storm ends up on ropes, Skye runs to SHINING WIZARD! Snapmare and SUPER- NO, Storm blocks and spins Skye, but Skye BASEMENT ENZIGURIS! Cover, TWO!! Storm survives and Skye grows frustrated. Saraya & Soho are also frustrated, they rally for Storm but the fans rally for Skye. Saraya tells the fans to shut up! Skye runs, hops on, but Storm shrugs her off! Skye SUPERKICKS! Skye runs, into a THESZ PRESS! Storm rains down fists, then she snarls as she stands back up. Storm gets the legs, but Skye kicks her away!

Skye runs in, only for Storm to spin her around! Storm uses the ropes, TORNADO DDT! Cover, TWO!! Skye survives and fans fire up! Saraya is furious but the ref says the count was fair. Skye goes to a corner but Storm says kiss this. SWEET HIP- NO, Skye picks the ankle! Skye KNEES Storm, runs, avoids Soho’s swipe, and she hits CODE BLUE!! But Soho is still distracting the ref!! Skye would’ve had this if not for Soho! Skye gets in Soho’s face, swings at her, but Storm runs in! Skye sends Storm into Soho, rolls and bridges, TWO!!! Storm stands, into a BOOT! Skye full nelsons, Storm arm-drags free to SHOTGUN Skye down!

Saraya says Storm has this now! Storm says kiss this, and here comes SWEET HIP MUSIC!! GERMAN SUPLEX, and then STORM ZERO!! Cover, Storm wins!

Winner: Toni Storm, by pinfall

The Outcasts with the assist, but now they bring out the spray paint! Fans boo as the Outcast scare off the ref, then surround Skye! But here comes Riho and Willow! Just like last week, Riho has the pipe!! Riho runs the Outcast off and warns them. The Outcasts leave for now, having gotten the win. Will Riho, Willow and Skye start thinking of sticking together from now on?

 

The AEW medical staff checks on Stu Grayson.

They’re working on his left arm, where did they feel it pop? But then Moxley sneaks up to say, “It’s just business.” And he puts on the SLEEPER!! Claudio & Yuta TOSS the medics aside! Stu is all alone as Moxley chokes him out, then SMACKS him off a trunk! The BCC give Stu the icepack back then leave, what will Hangman & the Dark Order have to say about this?

 

Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo!

The AAA Mega Championship match that was meant to happen in December of 2021 was denied because of injury and misfortune. But now we are all fortunate enough to have this match happen here! “HE was the longest reigning Mega Champion at 765 days, 292 days more than El Hijo del Vikingo. HE never lost that title. HE is undefeated in singles matches in Mexico and also on Dynamite. Many people say HE is also undefeated at life. HE is often complimented on his accomplishments, matches, chiseled physique and hair, yet he is personally proud of his win-loss record in Independence, Missouri, which is better than his record of 1-1 in… NOOOORTH CAROLINA~!

“He arrives tonight after his 833 mile journey from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. Weighing 224 pounds, HE is…! KENNY! OOOOOOOOOOOOMEEEEGAAAAAA~!” The fans go wild for the Cleaner, the Best Bout Machine, and Don Callis’ God of Pro-Wrestling, but will Omega prove he is better than the Mega Champion?

But as Omega makes his way down the ramp, El Hijo del Vikingo DIVES onto him! Fans fire up, EHDV throws off his cape, then he runs again, to FLY! Direct hit again and Independence is thunderous! EHDV puts Omega in the ring, springboards and MISSILE DROPKICKS! Omega ends up in a corner, EHDV runs in to clothesline! EHDV fires off forearms, but Omega turns it around to fire them back! The ref wants them to let off, this isn’t a match yet! Omega rains down fists, lets off, and now the bell rings! Fans are thunderous as Omega stomps EHDV down. Omega drags EHDV up, whips him corner to corner, but EHDV slips out to the apron!

Omega hits buckles, then EHDV ENZIGURIS! And GAMANGIRIS! EHDV climbs up, and jumps to IMPOLODER DRAGONRANA! Omega goes flying, then staggers up into the SCREW HIGH KICK! Omega’s on the ropes, EHDV runs to DOUBLE KNEE him through the ropes! Omega falls to the floor, EHDV refreshes the count, and fans say “This is Awesome!” EHDV SHOOTING STAR PRESSES to the floor! A bit double-edged, but fans lose their minds! Callis protests, the ring count climbs, but EHDV puts Omega in the ring. EHDV aims, slingshots and then springboards to 450 SPLASH! Cover, TWO!!

Omega goes to a corner, EHDV runs in to GAMANGIRI again! Omega staggers away, EHDV pursues but Omega CHOPS! And CHOPS again! EHDV falls over but Omega stalks him to a corner. Omega brings EHDV up to JAB! And JAB! fans rally and duel, Omega drags EHDV up to whip. Omega scoops EHDV for a tilt-o-whirl BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Omega drags EHDV back up fast, to fisherman BUSTER! Cover, TWO! EHDV hangs tough and Omega is frustrated but the fans are loving this. Omega stalks EHDV to the ropes, scrapes him to the apron, and then Omega goes out to follow EHDV.

Omega CLUBS EHDV, and whips him hard into barriers! EHDV falls in a heap, but Omega goes looking under the ring. Omega brings out a TABLE! Fans fire up for that, and Omega stands that table up near the ring. The ref reprimands, this isn’t a Tables match or anything like that. But fans chant, “WE WANT TABLES!” as Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Omega drags EHDV up, puts him in the ring, and Omega storms up to scoop and BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Omega clamps on with an armlock and chinbar, but he also fishhooks EHDV’s face! The ref reprimands, Omega lets off, but then pulls on EHDV’s hair! The ref counts but Omega lets off at 4. Omega looms over EHDV, stomps him, stomps him more, then springboard stomps! Omega drags EHDV around to KNEE him in the side! And again! Cover, TWO! EHDV hangs tough but Omega just snarls. Omega drags EHDV up to CHOP him back down! Omega drags EHDV up again to CLUB him back down!

Omega drags EHDV up at the ropes, ROCKS him with a right hand, then ROCKS him again! And again! And again! The ref reprimands and counts, Omega lets off, but then Omega CHOKES EHDV with his foot! Dynamite returns, the fans boo and the ref counts, but Omega lets off at 4 again. Omega ROCKS EHDV again, JABS him, then whips him to ropes. EHDV ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl RANA! Omega goes to the apron, fans fire up as EHDV pursues! EHDV ROCKS Omega, but Omega tomahawk chops back! EHDV CHOPS, but Omega CHOPS! EHDV CHOPS back, so Omega BOOTS him! Omega runs in, goes up, and he MONKEY FLIPS EHDV on the apron!

EHDV falls to the floor while fans lose minds over how tight that one was. Omega drags EHDV up to the apron, and he grins as he looks at the table he set up. Omega drags EHDV up, the ref reprimands but Omega full nelsons! EHDV slips free to GAMANGIRI again! EHDV goes up top, balances on the post, and FLYING DRAGONRANAS!! Fans are thunderous as Omega hits the floor! Omega flounders into the ring, EHDV shoves him further in. Fans say “This is Awesome!” as both men go to corners. EHDV runs corner to corner to clothesline! EHDV hoists Omega up top, and GAMANGIRIS yet again!

EHDV climbs up after Omega, fans fire up again as they start to brawl! Omega HEADBUTTS, reels EHDV in, and SUPER POWER- STEINER!!! EHDV reverses just in time, Omega clutches his head! EHDV goes to the ropes, stands from the middle and PHOENIX SPLASHES in!!! Cover, TWO?!?! Omega survives by nanoseconds!! Independence is electric as both men rise up! They hope these two “FIGHT FOREVER!” but it has to end somehow! EHDV throws a forearm, a SOBAT, and then he runs to springboard, into a POWERBOMB!! And then another POWERBOMB! Roll through and V-TRIGGER!! Cover, TWO!!!

Omega is furious as EHDV survives! Omega slashes his throat, drags EHDV up, and he full nelsons for a SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX! Omega snarls, he puts EHDV on the ropes and takes aim. BANG and V-TRIGGER!! But that’s not the end of it! Omega drags EHDV up, deadweight as he is, and Electric Chair Lifts! But EHDV throws down fists! EHDV hops down, UPPERCUTS, then goes up and up to FLYING POISON-RANA!!! Omega tumbles to the apron, and EHDV crawls over to push him onto the table! EHDV builds speed while fans fire up, and he goes up to ESCALARA 630 SENTON through the table!!!!

Independence is volcanic for “A E DUB! A E DUB!” while Callis is freaking out! Both men are down in the wreckage as the ring count starts. EHDV crawls away at 3 of 10, Omega finally stirs at 4. Both men drag themselves up at 6, stand at “OCHO!” And both men slide in at 9! EHDV covers, TWO!!! Omega is still in this and EHDV is beside himself! Fans rally up, both men rise again, and EHDV throws a haymaker! Omega gives it back, they go back and forth, faster and faster! They go forearm for forearm, stand up, and keep throwing shots! EHDV gets the edge, SOBATS, runs, into a V-TRIGGER!!

Omega whips, EHDV rolls up and SUNSET FLIP BOMBS! TWO?!?!? Omega narrowly escapes again and even HE is shocked! But EHDV hurries to a corner and climbs up top! Omega flounders in the drop zone, EHDV 630 SENTONS but FLOPS as Omega moves!! EHDV flounders up, into a V-TRIGGER!!! Omega drags EHDV up, Electric Chair Lifts, ONE WINGED ANGEL!!!! Cover, OMEGA WINS!

Winner: Kenny Omega, by pinfall

This was a dream match the moment it was made, but this became an all-time classic by the end! Tony Schiavone joins Callis and Omega in the ring to say this was an incredible match. Omega is back in singles competition, and that was one for the ages! Omega thanks Schiavone for that. The more time goes by, the more he wonders if he can still do this kind of stuff for the fans. Wait, wait! THE BCC JUMPS OMEGA!! Moxley, Claudio & Yuta all mug Omega, and fans boo while Callis can only shout at the ref to stop this! The BCC stand Omega up so they can throw body shots and haymakers!

Fans continue to boo, but wait! Sirens? An ambulance has returned? For who? Wait, HANGMAN is driving it!! The Cowboy has a 2×4, with nails in it! Fans are going nuts for “COWBOY SH*T!” while the BCC stomp away on Omega. But here comes Hangman, wood in hand! The BCC decide to bail! Callis checks on Omega but the damage has been done. Hangman wants Moxley to get his ass back in here, but he stays back. Callis tries to calm Hangman down, but he almost gets 2×4 to the face! Callis keeps pulling at Hangman’s arm to hold him back, but Hangman shakes free and Callis falls right down! Omega comes to, and misunderstands why Callis is down!

Callis blames Hangman but Hangman says he didn’t do anything to Don! Omega and Hangman argue, Callis cowers behind Omega, and Omega takes Callis’ side. Fans boo, but is this just Callis keeping Omega all to himself?


My Thoughts:

A great episode of Dynamite, but it already feels like they’re gonna keep things going until Double or Nothing, no big thing for April. We got a great promo out of the Four Young Pillars, and MJF is making the other three run the #1 contender race like he did Bryan Danielson from now until, I dunno, probably May 3rd so that May can focus on building MJF VS his challenger. Hard to say who it’ll be, but Darby’s off to a good start with that great Six Man Tag. Darby, Sting and Cassidy made an eclectic but great combination, especially with Sting borrowing some Freshly Squeezed tactics. And Cassidy’s International Championship card is open to just about anyone at this point.

Really good tag title match, but I should’ve figured shenanigans would help The Gunns retain. The Kingdom and Top Flight are solidly ROH Tag title contenders with #ReachForTheSky needing teams. Plus, The Gunns’ real story is with FTR, who came back to have a really good promo with them. Gunns VS FTR, Titles VS AEW contracts could honestly go either way. There’s a lot of talk out there of FTR going back to WWE since it’s under HHH right now, so this move could be how FTR exits AEW, but this could also be what guarantees FTR staying. Either way, this is going to be some really big stuff for the titles.

Good promo from Jade and her group, and you do have to appreciate Sterling’s gimmick of bringing about frivolous lawsuits on behalf of people to poke fun at wrestling tropes. The security guards finally got justice, even though they also got crushed by Wardlow, and now finishers that are exactly the same but with different names are being questioned. Pretty sure Leila loses the match and Taya tears up that document, though. Then it’ll be about who hits the chicken wing facebuster first to win that title. Jade has done an amazing job being an undefeated inaugural TBS Champion, but now is the time to move on to someone else so Jade can move on to the top title.

Great segment out of Hook, Stokely and The Firm. Great show from Stokely with trying to weasel out of this, then trying to run away from this, but of course he gets thrown around. Awesome use of spare guard railing, though. I figured Hook VS Ethan was going to be how this wraps up, can’t wait to see how that goes. And I appreciate Starks getting a little meta on the bad pacing of feuds. Starks VS Juice for Rampage, if it happens, will be great stuff, and maybe shenanigans helps Juice win to keep this going. Though, I feel like Starks and Juice could each be doing something better than spinning their wheels with each other. Give me Starks VS Hobbs and Orange VS Juice for those respective titles.

Speaking of which, only the second QTV segment and I’m just done with it. But they did point out the weird logic of Penta not being out there with Fenix last week. Penta VS Hobbs will probably go the same as Fenix VS Hobbs did, and Wardlow will come back for revenge. Also, another wrestling trope that needs poking at: Solo confessed to illegal activities but he won’t get investigated or arrested because it’s wrestling. If Sterling were a Face lawyer, he’d be right on Solo’s ass. But maybe Wardlow beats the crap out of Solo as his punishment, then he gets his shot at Hobbs at Double or Nothing to put this story to rest.

Great promo from Cole and Garcia, and I appreciate they had Garcia have that slip of the tongue. Garcia is of course enjoying the fun side of being a sports entertainer, showing off his personality and just doing whatever shenanigans he wants, but he also clearly enjoys the pro-wrestling stuff of just fighting. Garcia VS Cole is going to be awesome stuff, but Garcia and the JAS also have their story with the House of Black so who knows how the finish goes. Great match out of Storm VS Skye, and Skye looked great even in defeat. Another inconsistency in wrestling logic: Riho & Willow should’ve been ringside to start because they know The Outcasts will be up to no good. But I suppose that does give Riho & Willow their moment of heroism in running the Outcasts off.

I bring up that inconsistency in logic because that match was after Moxley VS Grayson, where both men had their allies ringside. The men can think to bring their boys but the women’s division can’t think to bring their friends along, when we’ve also always seen Britt have Rebel and/or Hayter and vice-versa? Anyway, great stuff out of Moxley VS Grayson, and Grayson also looked awesome even in defeat. The BCC apparently went after everyone Hangman considers a friend, as the Bucks were taken out off-camera by them, and then the BCC jump Grayson.

And then, for being a non-title TV main event, Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo went above and beyond anything I would’ve expected. There were some scary moments, like that Super Steiner counter to the powerbomb. But then again, it wouldn’t feel like an AAA match if there wasn’t some risk like that. BCC jumping Omega after he wins was a good way to keep the Elite reunion story going, but now there’s the new wrinkle of Don Callis wanting Omega to stay a singles star. To be fair, this is very much like the story of Callis, Omega and The Elite when AEW first got started. Callis wants Omega to return to that Omega, and he throws Hangman under the bus.

Another pro-wrestling logic thing is that no one watches the show back when it’s done, unless it helps the story. And I would hope Omega does that here to see what really happened as opposed to just trusting Callis and distrusting Omega. Or if not Omega, the Bucks can. The Bucks will have seen it on TV at the hospital (kayfabe) and The Bucks will tell Omega that Hangman didn’t hit Callis. Callis is also trying to recruit Konosuke, so it’d be great if Callis only comes out of this with one client. If Omega realizes not to trust Callis over The Elite, then Callis and Konosuke can stick together. If Omega still keeps Callis around, Konosuke can reject Callis to stay his own man.

My Score: 8.9/10


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Dark Results & Report! (3/21/23)

Toni Storm gets Dark!

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AEW Dark is on #ToniTime!

The Outcasts have drawn a line in the AEW Women’s Division, and are daring everyone else to cross it! Will Toni Storm strike down another “entitled rookie?”

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Juice Robinson VS Leon Ruffin; Juice wins.
  • Kiera Hogan VS Leila Grey; Leila wins.
  • The Iron Savages VS The Wingmen; The Iron Savages win.
  • The Renegades VS Avery Breaux & Mafiosa; The Renegades win.
  • Toni Storm VS Billie Starkz; Storm wins.

QUICK NOTES

Another surprisingly short line-up for Dark, with a couple matches that could go either way. The Iron Savages, formerly Bear Country, and the Wingmen will be a good one, but I’m leaning towards Bronson & Boulder winning that. Kiera Hogan VS Leila Grey, former Baddie taking on Jade’s last sidekick standing, could also go either way, but I’m leaning towards Kiera. But it’ll be good to see Robyn & Charlette Renegade get a win here to build that unofficial Women’s Tag Division AEW has.


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