Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (1/30/23)
We’re on the Road to WrestleMania!
It’s the Raw after the Royal Rumble!
Two Rumble matches, two Nightmares as winners! Cody Rhodes and Rhea Ripley will both share their plans for WrestleMania tonight on Raw!
- Elimination Chamber Match Qualifier: Seth Rollins VS Chad Gable w/ Otis; Rollins wins and advances to the United States title Elimination Chamber match.
- Candice LeRae w/ Mia Yim VS Iyo Sky w/ Damage CTRL; Sky wins.
- Elimination Chamber Match Qualifier: Johnny Gargano w/ Dexter Lumis VS Baron Corbin w/ JBL; Gargano wins and advances to the United States title Elimination Chamber match.
- The Miz VS Rick Boogs; Boogs wins.
- Elimination Chamber Match Qualifier: Dolph Ziggler VS Bronson Reed; Bronson wins and advances to the United States title Elimination Chamber match.
- Cody Rhodes VS Finn Balor w/ The Judgment Day; Cody wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
Cody Rhodes is here!
The American Nightmare is the 2023 Men’s Royal Rumble winner, having made his return after surgery on his torn pectoral! Cody gets the pyro but fans are already plenty fired up as he goes to the ring. Cody gets the mic as fans chant his name. The fans also chant, “You Deserve It!” as Cody looks up at the WrestleMania sign. Cody soaks up the energy and then says, “So… What do you guys wanna talk about? I think it goes without saying, but every week there’s someone new watching this show, so I’ll go ahead and say it. I am not the same person when I started this journey over 15 years ago on this very show.
“I’ve thought a lot, though, about 19-year-old me, first day on the job, pulling up to this metal barn, Ohio Valley Wrestling. There’s a sign on the door that says, ‘Tomorrow’s superstars today.’ And I’m sitting in my beat-up Volkswagen Jetta, and I remember, I vividly thought to myself, ‘I’m gonna be WWE Champion inside of two years.’ Hey, I was ambitious, albeit a little delusional, because I also thought, ‘I’m gonna be the next John Cena.'” Cody says if he could go back, maybe write a letter to young Cody, what would he say? Cody wonders if he’d tell himself, “I don’t think it’s gonna go down like that, chief.”
Would Cody reveal that one night in London, you’re gonna get slapped so hard on live TV that your knees buckle. “You’re gonna be Dashing Cody Rhodes, and you’re gonna give out grooming tips. You’re gonna win the Intercontinental Championship and restore it to its former retro glory. You’re gonna paint your paint and become less than. That triumph will become tragedy will become triumph all over again.” Would Cody tell himself that the lovely lady ring announcer becomes his wife? Would Cody tell himself that he’s gonna lose his 295 best friend but gain a 6 pound one back that has his same eyes?
Would Cody tell himself that he’s gonna be on fire at some point, bleed all over the world, and that in 2015, he does what everyone tells him not to and goes on excursion? And that one part of that excursion is fully focused on the industry’s health and neglecting his own? Or that on January 28th, 2023, at the Royal Rumble, he outlasted 29 others and punched his ticket, the very first in the family to do this, and go under the brightest lights on the biggest stage at WrestleMania?
Fans fire up again and chant Cody’s name, and Cody tells them, “Truth be told, I wouldn’t tell him a single thing. I wouldn’t tell him a single thing because every single piece on this broken road, every splinter on this upward ladder has been unequivocally, 100% worth it!” Fans cheer that! Cody says he is here tonight, he heard the fans singing his song, and that song will still be his song, but the most important words are those very first ones, because those are his own. “Wrestling has more than one royal family.” In fact, WWE has more than one royal family.
“But for that to be true, for it to be real, for it to be venerated, validated and vindicated in my heart, I have to stand across from another. I have to stand across from an entire bloodline. I have to stand across from the Tribal Chief, the Head of the Table.” Fans already boo, knowing who he’s calling out. Cody says he has to stand across from one who is essentially the LeBron James of WWE, the biggest star on the planet, a man who has held the title for over 800 DAYS. Cody must stand across… from Roman Reigns. Fans chant “ROMAN SUCKS!” but Cody says, “I’m sure you can hear it, I have a great deal of respect for Roman.”
But what’s next, Cody has the same sincerity: WrestleMania is in 62 days. That might be just 62 normal days for Roman, but that is 62 days “from the rest of my life.” At WrestleMania, undesirable has already become undeniable, but it will be uncrowned until that night when it ends. At WrestleMania, pull up a chair, sit wherever the hell you want, because on that night, someone else will be eating. After WrestleMania, Roman can be the Tribal Chief, the Head of the Table, the biggest star in the world, but what he won’t be… is the UNDISPUTED WWE UNIVERSAL CHAMPION! The American Nightmare has spoken, but wait, here comes the Judgment Day!
Damian Priest, Finn Balor and Dominik Mysterio head tot he ring, with mics of their own. Finn is confused. Is Cody returning to do something original? Or is he just gonna knock off all of Finn’s old stuff like Cody’s done before. And on top of that, Cody ruined the Judgment Day’s plans at the Rumble! Mami Rhea did what she was supposed to and she won her Rumble match. Later tonight, we all have the honor to hear her tell us who her opponent will be. But DOM was supposed to win the Men’s Rumble! Fans boo because that was not happening. Finn says speaking of the Rumble, what happened to Rey that he couldn’t make it?
Dom knows, he found Rey’s mask. And y’know what? Cody, you put your hands on Dom. Cody ruined Dom’s moment at the Rumble. But if that happened in prison, Cody wouldn’t be standing here right now. He would’ve got got! Priest says Dom should be the ONLY multigenerational superstar to main event Mania! Not some suck up who gets whatever he wants! Look at Rhea: entered #1, outlasted 29 others, and won the whole thing. She EARNED a spot! Cody is the golden boy, he got handed #30! How does that happen? Dom says it doesn’t matter. Cody owes Dom. Cody owes Dom an apology!
Cody has them stop there. Dom, Cody doesn’t wanna run the risk of pissing you of, but uh… Is Dom trying to scare Cody straight? Is that what this is? This could be very different. Cody already mentioned WWE’s royal families. The Rhodes, the Mysterios, Cody has a huge amount of respect for Dom’s dad. Yeah, Dom’s dad? Real funny, since Dom doesn’t. And Dom doesn’t have respect for anyone’s dad here, not even Cody’s! Fans boo, but Cody says fine. Cody gets this now. Fans chant “KICK HIS ASS!” Cody says between now and Mania, he could play it safe, try and stay healthy, or he could be himself, and kick Dom’s ass!
Cody is ready to take anyone on, really! And he’ll do it here, tonight! Judgment Day wants to punish Cody for “stealing” the moment, but will he end up doing that anyway here on Raw?
But wait! EDGE IS HERE! And he CLOBBERS each member of the Judgment Day! Edge rains fists on Finn but Priest drags him up. Edge brawls with Priest and Dom, security and officials rush out, and Adam Pearce will not have this break down onw! But then Cody joins in! Cody goes after Finn, and security, and Dom! Tulsa is thunderous, will The American Nightmare have the Rated R Superstar watching his back against common enemies?
Elimination Chamber Match Qualifier: Seth Rollins VS Chad Gable w/ Otis!
Austin Theory will defend his United States Championship in THE Elimination Chamber, and the first qualifier is here! The Visionary takes on “Master” Gable, will we be singing the song all the way to Montreal? Or will Gable “SHOOOSH~!” everyone here in Tulsa?
The bell rings and the two circle. They tie up, Rollins wrenches to a wristlock, but Gable rolls, bridges, handsprings, wrenches back and headlocks to spin and toehold! Gable gets an ANKLE LOCK, but Rollins scrambles to the ROPEBREAK! Fans chant, “GABLE SUCKS!” but Gable keeps focused as Rollins stands up. Fans sing, “OH~ OHH~ OHHH~!” as Rollins and Gable reset. They circle, Gable waistlocks, CHAOS THEORY! Bridging cover, TWO!! Rollins escapes, bails out, but Gable goes to the apron to CANNONBALL! Gable puts Rollins in, throat chops him down, then goes up the corner! DIVING HEADBUTT! Cover, TWO!!
Rollins survives, Gable is steaming, but Raw goes picture in picture. Gable says, “A THANK YEW~!” as Rollins flops back out of the ring. Rollins shakes out the stars and stands up, but Gable stalks him around the way. Gable puts Rollins back in, then drags him to a corner. Gable has a leg, and he says, “SHOOSH!” before he SLAMS the leg into the post! Rollins scrambles away, clutching the knee. Gable goes in, has Rollins in a corner, and wraps the leg around ropes. The ref counts, Gable lets off but then stomps the leg! Gable brings Rollins out to DRAGON SCREW the leg! And then Gable wraps on a standing toehold!
Rollins endures, keeps his shoulders off the mat, and fights the hold. Gable YANKS the leg, then tells everyone to “SHOOSH!” Gable drags Rollins back to the corner, “SHOOSH~!” but Rollins YANKS Gable into the post! Otis fans Gable off but Rollins builds speed! Rollins hobbles but he manages to WRECK Gable with a dropkick! Rollins puts Gable back in, hurries after him, but Gable hits another DRAGON SCREW! Gable drags Rollins by that bad leg and has another standing toehold. Gable YANKS the leg, then looms over Rollins. Gable drags Rollins around to spinning toehold! And then another spinning toehold! And another!
Gable cranks on the leg but Rollins endures. Raw returns to single picture and fans rally up. Rollins kicks and CHOPS Gable, and he gets free! Otis is upset but Rollins brings Gable up. Rollins CHOPS, CHOPS and CHOPS! Rollins whips, Gable reverses and runs in to get the leg! Gable puts one in the ropes, to have the other with a DRAPING DRAGON SCREW! Rollins writhes and clutches his bad leg while Gable climbs up. MOONSAULT, but Rollins moves to roll Gable up! TWO and Rollins deadlifts Gable for a BUCKLE BUMP! Both men are down and Otis is freaking out. Otis coaches Gable but fans sing the song, “OH~ OHH~ OHHH~!”
Gable and Rollins rise, and Rollins rallies with LARIATS! Mule kick, front kick, ROLLING- NO, Gable gets around, O’Conner to the CHAOS THEORY but Rollins lands out! SUPERKICK! FALCON ARROW! Cover, TWO!! Gable survives but Rollins is in too much pain to be frustrated. Rollins rises as the fans sing even louder and harder. Rollins shakes the bad leg out as he goes to a corner. Rollins runs in but Gable avoids the stomp! Rollins kicks low, hooks the arms, but Gable trips to a jackknife! TWO!! Gable runs in, into a roll-up! TWO, sunset flip! TWO and Rollins jackknifes! TWO as Gable bridges up!
Gable spins Rollins, Canadian Rack, for the CLIFFHANGER! Cover, TWO!!! Rollins survives and no one can believe it, least of all Gable! Gable snarls and fans rally up. Gable tells everyone to “SHOOOOSH~!” and he brings down the straps! Gable deadlifts but Rollins elbows the suplex away! PELE, but into an ANKLE LOCK! Gable keeps on the bad leg, then leans on the hold! Rollins kicks and rolls but Gable still holds on! Rollins rolls to a VICTORY ROLL! TWO!!! STOMP- NO! Gable grabs the leg to have the ANKLE LOCK! Rollins rolls, kicks, Gable comes back to jackknife, but Rollins rolls through! PEDIGREE!!! Cover, ROLLINS WINS!
Winner: Seth Rollins, by pinfall (advances to the Elimination Chamber)
The Visionary finds the way to win, and he’s headed to Montreal! Will he get that title back from Theory? Who else will join them in that high risk match-up?
Candice LeRae w/ Mia Yim VS Iyo Sky w/ Damage CTRL!
This grudge has been going for some time not, but the Women’s Rumble match only added fuel to the fire. The Genius of the Sky, the Captain of Team Kick, and the self-proclaimed Role Model all ganged up on the Poison Pixie, and everyone in that match really, so it’s time for payback! Will #CandiceWrestling get a big win off the WWE Women’s Tag Team Champion? Or will DMG CTRL check off some contenders on the Road to WrestleMania?
The bell rings and the two tie up. Candice trips Sky, things speed up, Sky redirects but Candice follows. Sky goes Matrix, rolls Candice up but Candice slips free. Candice avoids the sweep, keeps moving, and avoids a dropkick! Jackknife bridge, TWO! STEP-UP SENTON! Cover, TWO! Sky YANKS Candice into ropes! Candice sputters, Sky hits a FLAPJACK! DMG CTRL fires up but the fans boo. Bayley wants commentary to emphasize Sky eliminating Candice in the Rumble. Sky scoops Candice to SLAM her down! Fans rally for Candice but Sky clamps on a chinlock while Raw goes picture in picture.
Sky grabs Candice’s arms and has a straitjacket stretch! Candice endures, Raw returns to single picture, and Candice fights up. Candice backs Sky into a corner, then arm-drags her away. Sky comes back but into boots! Candice runs, to dropkick Sky down! Fans rally while Sky bails out. Bayley says Candice still sucks, but Candice WRECKS Sky with a dropkick! Candice hurries to put Sky on the apron but Sky kicks Candice away! Sky builds speed to DIVE! Direct hit at the ramp and Sky eggs the fans on! Fans boo, Mia coaches Candice but DMG CTRL is loving this. Sky puts Candice back in, steps in, but into a dropkick!
Sky falls back out, Candice goes up the ropes! SPRINGBOARD CROSSBODY! Fans fire up, Mia argues with DMG CTRL, and Raw goes picture in picture again. Sky and Candice rise, but Candice drags Sky up into the ring. Kai keeps Bayley from hearing the fans taunt them, but Candice climbs up the corner. Sky trips Candice and she falls into the ring! Sky elbows Candice, RAMS into her, then RAMS her again! The ref counts, Sky lets off, and Mia coaches Candice again. But Sky digs both boots into Candice! And then SWINGING METEORAS! Sky eggs Candice on, then brings her around to a cover, TWO!
Sky is annoyed but she’s back on Candice with a chinlock. Candice endures, even as Sky digs her knee into Candice’s back. Candice fights up but Sky shifts to a dragon sleeper! Candice still fights up, throws body shots, and runs, to tilt-o-whirl and IRON OCTOPUS! Sky endures now, flails and reaches out, but Candice pulls on the arm! Sky powers out to a SIDEWALK SLAM! Both women are down and DMG CTRL is upset. Candice goes to the apron, Sky goes to the other end. Sky runs in to SUNSET FLIP, but Candice holds onto the ropes! Candice stomps but Sky dodges, to trip Candice up! Candice hits the apron, but Sky gives her an APRON BACK SUPLEX!
Candice writhes while Sky climbs back up. Candice kicks Sky away! Candice stands, runs in, APRON COMPLETE SHOT! Sky flounders, Candice hurries up a corner, and Raw returns to single picture. Fans fire up for the MISSILE DROPKICK! Cover, TWO!! Sky survives and Candice grows frustrated. Bayley talks trash but Candice puts Sky up top. Candice CHOPS, then climbs up. But Sky hops down to YANK Candice down! Candice hits buckles, and then Sky underhooks! TIGER BACKBREAKER! Bayley is fired up but fans boo. Sky goes to the corner, runs in, SHINKANSEN! Sky puts Candice in the drop zone and goes back up!
Fans boo but Candice SPANKS Sky! Candice climbs up to SUPER GERMAN SUPLEX! High stack cover, TWO!! Sky survives again and Kai breathes easy again. Candice and Sky are both down but Mia rallies the fans. Candice and Sky go forehead to forehead, then forearm for forearm! Candice forearms, CHOPS and repeat! She fires off in the corner, runs in but Sky dodges. Sky runs in but into an elbow! Candice climbs but Sky CLUBS her! Electric Chair Lift, but Candice fights it to a POISON-RANA!! Cover, TWO!?!? Sky survives yet again and DMG CTRL is beside themselves! Candice snarls as she stalks Sky to a corner.
Candice hoists Sky up top, climbs up after her, and brings her in. But Sky throws Candice away! No wild rides here! Sky adjusts, fans boo, OVER THE MOONSAULT onto BOOTS!! Candice drags Sky into a cradle but Kai distracts the ref! Mia is pissed, Candice would’ve won already! The ref finally counts, TWO!! Mia chases DMG CTRL off and Candice hits a CODE BREAKER! Bayley gets up, Candice DECKS her! But Sky rolls Candice up! SKY WINS!
Winner: Iyo Sky, by pinfall
The numbers game wins again! Michin wasn’t enough to stop Bayley and Kai, but will DMG CTRL face the consequences of their actions soon enough?
Rhea Ripley heads to the ring!
As promised, the Judgment Day’s Eradicator is here, and she is ready to make that WrestleMania decision. Rhea has the mic to say, “It’s been awhile since I’ve been out here without my Latino Heat, my Dom-Dom, and the Judgment Day crew. But I really just wanted all the attention on me. Two nights ago, I disrupted the status quo. I did the unthinkable, I went the distance, I came in here at number one, and overcame and outlasted 29 other women to win the Royal Rumble match. And now… I get to choose whichever champion I wanna face at WrestleMania.”
Fans “WOO~!” but also chant, “EST! EST!” Rhea says three years ago, she had just turned 24 and her career just got started. She was NXT Women’s Champion. She came here to Raw, stood in this ring, and challenged the winner of the Women’s Rumble, Charlotte Flair. She wanted the match at WrestleMania, and Charlotte put her in her place. The funny thing about Charlotte is she’s somehow always in the title picture. Charlotte is always at the top of her game, and Rhea hates to give her credit, “but she seems to get better each and every year. The normal flow here in the WWE is that Charlotte Flair is at the top.
“But I’m the disrupter. I don’t like the natural flow, I don’t like the normal formula, and I don’t like things being overplayed. So, Charlotte. I advise you to enjoy everyone rising and bowing down to the Queen. Because they’re about to rise to Rhea Ripley!” Fans fire up for that! At WrestleMania, Rhea plans to put Charlotte in her place! “Charlotte Flair, I choose you.” Rhea isn’t worried about the title, she’s focused on revenge! Will the SmackDown Women’s Champion soon face her Judgment Day?
Backstage interview with Seth Rollins.
Cathy Kelley is with the Visionary, and he is fired up! Before we talk Elimination Chamber, let’s talk tonight! Tulsa, Oklahoma~! “What a crowd! What a fight against Chad Gable, and what a win! And now, I’m going on to Elimination Chamber. I’m gonna beat five other dudes inside that Chamber. I’m gonna take the United States title back from Austin Theory, and when it’s time, WRESTLEMANIA! LOS ANGELES! LET’S GOOO~! HAHAHAHA!” Then Cathy has to ask, at the Rumble, there was a lot of chatter after seeing surprise entrant, Logan Paul, eliminating Rollins. Can we get a comment?
Rollins takes a breath, and smiles, before walking away. Is the Visionary going to ignore Logan Paul to focus on The Now? Will the ImPAULsive Influencer do something to change that?
Elimination Chamber Match Qualifier: Johnny Gargano w/ Dexter Lumis VS Baron Corbin w/ JBL!
Johnny Wrestling has run into the Modern Day Wrestling God before, both in the ring and at the poker table. But the stakes are even higher than those encounters combined! Who will win their way into the Elimination Chamber in Montreal? And who will be left out in the cold?
The bell rings and Gargano rushes in! Corbin catches Gargano, RAMS him into a corner, but Gargano dodges the lariat to fire off haymakers! Corbin CLOBBERS Gargano, drags him up and whips him to ropes, but Gargano ducks ‘n’ dodges and RANAS! Corbin staggers up, into a DROPKICK! But Corbin comes back to BOOT Gargano down! Corbin puts Gargano in a corner, throws hands, but fans taunt “BUM ASS CORBIN!” Corbin gets annoyed by that, but he whips Gargano corner to corner hard! Gargano tumbles up and out to the apron, but Corbin drags him back in. Corbin choke grips, to CHOKE SLAM BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO!
Corbin is annoyed but Gargano survives. Fans rally for Johnny Wrestling but Corbin scoops him. Gargano slips off, elbows Corbin away, then sidesteps to schoolboy KICK! Corbin staggers, Gargano throws him out of the ring, and then builds speed to WRECK Corbin with a dropkick! Gargano slingshots, Corbin slides in, but Gargano shoulders into him! Slingshot, but into a HAYMAKER! Down goes Gargano and Corbin goes out after him. Corbin choke grips, stares down Lumis, and CHOKE SLAMS Gargano on the barriers! Gargano falls and fans boo as Raw goes picture in picture.
Corbin looms over Gargano, drags him back up, and brings him around. Corbin SMACKS Gargano off the announce desk, the ref wants him to get this i the ring, but Corbin tells him to hold on. Corbin drags Gargano around to then RAM into barriers! Gargano falls, Corbin refreshes the ring count, and Corbin stalks Gargano. JBL argues with the ref but Corbin drags Gargano into the ring. Cover, TWO! Corbin looms over Gargano, drags him up, and ROCKS him with a right! Corbin has Gargano in the corner with more haymakers, then he puts Gargano up top. Corbin ROCKS Gargano again, climbs up after him, and throws down fists!
Corbin then stands Gargano up, but Gargano throws body shots! Gargano HEADBUTTS Corbin off the corner! Gargano reels Corbin in, for a TORNADO DDT! JBL is stunned but the fans rally up! Gargano drags himself to ropes, staggers over, and he throws haymakers on Corbin! The ref counts as they’re in the corner, but Gargano whips corner to corner. Corbin reverses, runs in, but Gargano dodges. Corbin slides out, slides in, and CLOBBERS Gargano! Cover, TWO! Corbin is furious, so he clamps on a half nelson chinbar! Gargano endures as Corbin leans on the hold. Raw returns to single picture as fans rally up for Gargano.
Gargano fights up, throws elbows, then elbows free! Gargano runs, but Corbin CLOBBERS him! Corbin rains down elbows then covers, TWO! Gargano goes to the apron and Corbin scowls. Corbin storms over, drags Gargano up, and ROCKS Gargano. Corbin runs side to side, but into a SLINGSHOT SPEAR! Cover, TWO! Corbin survives but JBL still looks a bit worried. Gargano drags Corbin up, Lumis is stoic, but Corbin choke grips! Corbin TOSSES Gargano to a corner, runs in, but Gargano BOOTS him away! Gargano goes up, leaps over Corbin, but Corbin slides out and in, into a SUPERKICK! Another SUPERKICK knocks Corbin down! Cover, TWO!!
JBL is worried again while Gargano grits his teeth. Corbin sits up, fans rally for Johnny Wrestling, and Gargano storms up on Corbin. Corbin throws body shots but Gargano throws forearms. Corbin shoves Gargano, Gargano gets around, redirects, dodges, but Corbin ELBOWS him! Gargano rebounds to DISCUS! Corbin rebounds, into an ENZIGURI! Gargano keeps moving, but runs into DEEP SIX! Cover, TWO!! Gargano survives and Corbin is furious! Corbin rains down fists but the ref warns him. Corbin lets off, throws off his shirt, but fans boo, they do NOT want that free souvenir.
Corbin drags Gargano up, reels him in, but Gargano ROCKS him! Gargano goes to a corner, Corbin runs in, but Gargano POSTS him! JBL is furious, but Gargano DIVES to send Corbin into the desk! Gargano puts Corbin in the ring but JBL tears the desk apart! But then Lumis steps over, with a HATCHET! JBL wants his hat but Lumis CHOPS it with the hatchet! JBL shouts for 911, but Lumis gives Gargano a thumbs up. Gargano GAMANGIRIS, but Corbin BOOTS Gargano out of the spear! END OF- NO, ROLL-UP!! GARGANO WINS!!
Winner: Johnny Gargano, by pinfall (advances to the Elimination Chamber)
Corey Graves questions why Lumis was out here at all, but we just saw why! Lumis made sure JBL didn’t pull something. Gargano is going to Montreal, will Johnny Wrestling become Johnny America with the United States title?
MVP is in the VIP Lounge!
Montel Vontavius Porter welcomes us, and says that means big things are still popping, little things are still stopping, so sit back, relax and enjoy the view, because the VIP Lounge is still for people better than all of you. But tonight’s guest is a man “courageous enough to defend the United States Championship inside the Elimination Chamber.” It’s Atlanta’s own, Austin Theory! Fans boo as The Now struts his way out to the ring. Of course, Theory is only champion because Brock Lesnar screwed out Bobby Lashley again, but he’s still gonna count that.
Anyway, Theory steps past the velvet rope and through the ring ropes to relax on the couch. MVP says to make himself comfortable, and Theory says, “Just wow!” Fans boo, but MVP wants them to hear the man out. Theory says first of all, beyond all this disrespect, thank you, MVP, for inviting him! MVP says you’re welcome, happy to have you. When Theory was a “little kid,” he used to watch the VIP Lounge. In fact, that was a long time ago. But that’s why Theory’s here! He’s here to reinvent the VIP Lounge and make it relevant again, just like he will for MVP. Oh, how considerate.
Think about this: The VIP Lounge presents ATL – Austin Theory Live! Even better, get rid of the VIP Lounge and just make it Austin Theory Live! MVP says there is a ring to that, but to remind Theory, hot trends come and go, but classics never go out of style. Well, Theory is a classic. Uh, no, you’re not old enough yet. But they’ll figure this out. The VIP Lounge presents Austin Theory Live! Fans boo and Theory tells them to shut up. MVP does like the sound of that title, but maybe after the Elimination Chamber, Theory won’t have one. MVP wants to talk with Theory about that. Fans chant “YOU SUCK!” at Theory but he grins.
“Oh, I suck? You shut up because I am the CHAMP! And speaking of champ, did MVP just call me champ?” MVP confirms, he did. The same man that called Bobby Lashley the champ? And last week, MVP said Lashley was gonna beat MVP. MVP admits to that. So MVP thinks Lashley can beat Theory? MVP knows Lashley can. Oh, he knows? Well… Theory says he’s just messing around. But let’s talk the Chamber. It’s grueling, it’s hard to survive, but Theory survived it before. Theory was in the most grueling spot! Brock Lesnar F5’d him off the top of a chamber! But here he is, still standing!
And why is that? Because Theory IS the ruthlessness that this new generation needs! And NO amount of aggression can stop him! MVP says he likes this! MVP likes the confidence! He gets it, he understands where Theory is psychological. MVP was once a young, brash United States Champion, and was also once in an Elimination Chamber match. And Undertaker threw MVP off the top of a pod! So that means Theory is terrified, scared out of his mind, but doing a good job hiding it, just like MVP did. “But you never know who’s gonna be in that Chamber.” Theory asks MVP if that’s a threat. No, it’s a warning.
MVP is putting Theory up on game. Oh, is he? Trying to compare Lashley to the Undertaker? Lashley is MORE dangerous than Taker, to Theory. Oh, well that’s great Lashley is more dangerous, because Theory’s already beaten him twice. And this US Championship will be defended in the Chamber, but Lashley won’t be in it! So let’s talk about something that’s not the past. No problem, MVP can do that. He and Lashley aren’t business partners, so MVP is not at liberty to speak on Lashley’s back. But MVP knows Lashley, so for Theory’s health, should he survive- HIS HEALTH?! MVP cares about Theory’s health? Just a little bit.
Well, MVP should be more worried about his own health! More importantly, MVP should be worried about Lashley’s health. Everyone here knows that Lashley is MVP’s meal ticket, and that meal ticket is gonna get chewed up by Brock Lesnar! But wait! Here comes Bobby Lashley! Fans fire up as the All Mighty makes his way to the ring, and MVP defends he has nothing to do with this. Lashley pushes over the velvet rope, gets in the ring, and Theory says he shouldn’t even be here! What’s Lashley doing? But then MVP has Lashley stay back, and Theory says, “That’s right, Bobby. Listen to your daddy.”
Hearing that, MVP shrugs and says whatever. MVP stands aside and Lashley ROCKS Theory! And clotheslines him in the corner! Lashley throws the furniture around, Theory runs in, but into a COMPLETE SHOT! Fans fire up as Lashley continues to move things aside! MVP stands Theory up, Lashley runs in, but Theory uses MVP as a shield! The SPEAR hits MVP!! Theory runs away, and Lashley is even more furious! Theory says Lashley is the past and he’s done with the past! But will Lashley force The Now to deal with him in the near future?
Backstage interview with the Judgment Day.
Byron Saxton walks over to ask Finn about tonight’s main event, the first-time-ever of Finn VS Cody. But also, Byron brings up their altercation with Edge. Finn thought Edge would’ve had enough by now, but clearly not. Byron knows Finn isn’t hard to find, so tell Edge that Finn works Mondays. As for Cody, the Too Sweet is Finn’s. The finger guns, that’s Finn’s. The number 30 spot in the Rumble, that SHOULD’VE been Finn’s! Cody’s been stealing from Finn for years! “So tonight, he’s getting taxed! Because Finn Balor is coming to collect.” The Prince is ready, but will he be able to get even with the American Nightmare?
The Miz is in the ring!
The Hollywood A-Lister says he has something on his shoulder, and it’s a hell of a lot more than a chip! First, last week on Raw’s 30th Anniversary show, Miz was not given time, he was assaulted by Kevin Owens! “Who, as far as I’m concerned, got exactly what he deserved at the Royal Rumble.” And speaking of, Miz got a terrible number in the Rumble! And then everyone teamed up on him because he was a threat, and he got eliminated FIRST! Then Miz goes to the airport and fans chanted “FIRST MAN OUT!” at him. The fans chant that here now! IF they wanna act like children, he’ll treat them like children! He raises his hand! “When my hand goes up, your mouths go shut!”
And tonight, instead of Miz having a chance to qualify for the Elimination Chamber, he has NOTHING! He wants to be treated with RESPECT! And until he is given matches that deserve his star power- Adam Pearce interrupts. We get it, Miz is upset, but Miz is always upset. Miz wants opportunities, but he always wants opportunities. But Pearce has a guy beating down his down wanting that same opportunity. So please welcome to the Raw roster… RICK BOOGS! Fans fire up as Boogs is back! Boogs air guitars and air drums to the ring, and Miz is confused. Boogs rocks in the ring, and Miz has him hold on. “Boogs? You want me to have a match with Boogs?!”
Miz says he is in a $10 THOUSAND suit that Maryse bought him! He can’t have a match! Pearce says fine, but Miz is always talking about how awesome he is, so here’s the way to prove it. A ref heads to the ring, this is happening!
The Miz VS Rick Boogs!
The bell rings, Miz protests, but he backs up into Boogs! Boogs TOSSES Miz into a corner! Boogs runs in but Miz has him stop! Miz doesn’t want him damaging the suit! Boogs fires up and stars air-drumming again. Miz ROCKS Boogs with a sucker punch! Fans boo, Miz says he’s in a suit! Boogs still gut wrenches Miz, throws him around, and Miz’s shoes fly off! Boogs then hits a GUT WRENCH SUPLEX! Miz staggers up, into a trophy lift! And a POWERSLAM! Cover, Boogs wins!
Winner: Rick Boogs, by pinfall
Now that was awesome! Boogs is ready to rock on Raw, will we see him turn it up to 11 on the way to WrestleMania?
The Alpha Academy regroups backstage.
Otis says that when the going gets tough, the tough get rough. Is that the saying? Otis and Gable go to the locker room, and Maximum Male Models is here? Maçé and Mansöôr don’t even understand what they’re looking at in Otis. “It’s disgusting.” “It’s grotesque!” But Maxxine Dupri says Otis is PERFECT! Huh? Is Maxxine looking at the same Otis we all are?
Bayley heads to the ring!
The Role Model walks back out, not only feeling good over helping Iyo Sky win against Candice LeRae, but also feeling good from making sure Becky Lynch didn’t win the Women’s Rumble, and beating down Becky to avoid the steel cage match with her. Bayley laughs and gets the mic as fans boo. “Did you guys really think I’d leave the building without talking about that?” Fans chant “BAYLEY SUCKS!” but she says she doesn’t. She knows we all saw what happened on Raw 30. Everyone is talking about how DMG CTRL took out Becky and made history. “It felt so good. We had so much confidence going into the Royal Rumble, if you couldn’t tell.”
They were dominant! Elimination after elimination after elimination, etc! But Bayley’s favorite was when she single-handedly eliminated The Man, Becky Lynch! HA! “Now finally, thank goodness, I’m done with Becky. The story is down, we’ve ended things, this obsession she has with Damage Control is done-” WAIT! Here comes Big Time Becks! Becky is the birthday girl tonight, and she tells Bayley, “Shut up, Bayley, ya stupid fool.” They’re not done until The Man says they’re done. Becky had already won the Rumble, she was just making sure Bayley and her team didn’t. Right, sounds like an excuse to Bayley.
Oh, excuses like robbing the fans of their Steel Cage match. Excuses like attacking Becky before the bell because Bayley was too scared. Excuses like doing whatever you can to avoid going 1v1 because Bayley doesn’t want to admit Becky’s better than her. Bayley laughs at that, and tells the fans to pipe down. Excuses, huh? Bayley is making excuses? No, Bayley is smart! Read a book or something! But Becky says Tulsa gets it. Bayley says she’s here to celebrate but Becky has to come out here and make it all about her. Well, it is Becky’s birthday. Bayley doesn’t give a damn! Becky doesn’t tell Bayley where and when to be or what to do! She’s not the suck-ups in the crowd!
Bayley knows Becky. And Bayley doesn’t like “Rebecca.” Becky is overrated. Becky isn’t good enough for all of this. To be champion again. Or to be in the ring with Bayley 1v1. Becky isn’t even good enough for her husband, Seth Freakin’ Rollins! HAH! Don’t act like you don’t know. The only reason Rollins married Becky is cuz he knocked her up! Becky stares daggers at Bayley’s smug smile. Becky says after all this time, she thought they were only fighting over wrestling. But whatever this is, this once-friendship, this animosity, this bitterness Bayley has, it all started 10 years ago in NXT in Orlando.
So since Raw will be in Orlando next week, that is where they should end this! Becky and Bayley will get that Steel Cage match once and for all! Bayley says, “What’re you, stupid, Becky? No! No chance!” Becky had a feeling Bayley would say that, so she’ll be right back. Oh, is she gonna go find another excuse? Another reason why she’s better than Bayley? Bayley has no time for this! She has to leave this crappy city. But then Becky returns, dragging Dakota Kai! Bayley is freaking out as Becky has Dakota’s leg inside a chair! What is it gonna be, Bayley? Kai, shush, The Man is talking. Bayley has to choose: the steel cage, or Kai getting the steel chair?
Bayley says wait WAIT WAIT! Bayley accepts the match! Oh, good. Thanks. Becky lets Kai go, and says Bayley can bring her friends along. But uh, maybe go check on Iyo in the back. Becky leaves and Bayley hurries to Kai’s side. Will Bayley regret pushing Big Time Becks to this point?
Backstage interview with Adam Pearce.
Cathy Kelley is with the WWE official, and says he has something big to announce. Yes, two big announcements. First, he is ecstatic that yes, next week, Becky VS Bayley in the Steel Cage is happening! And as if that’s not big enough, Rhea Ripley called out Charlotte Flair for her WrestleMania title match, so who will face Bianca Belair for her title? We figure that out at Elimination Chamber! There will be a Raw Women’s Championship #1 contenders Elimination Chamber match! The winner goes on to WrestleMania to face the EST!
Pearce says that the first four entrants are already decided, as they will be the final four superstars in the Women’s Rumble: Raquel Rodriguez, Liv Morgan, Nikki Cross and Asuka! “But wait, there’s more!” Also next week on Raw, they will hold a qualifying match for the fifth entrant in a Fatal 4 Way! Mia Yim VS Candice LeRae VS Piper Niven VS Carmella! All this, next week on Raw in Orlando! But wait, in walks CHELSEA GREEN! She asks if Pearce is the manager. He introduces himself but she already knows his name. She just wants to be sure he’s the man to talk to about the “unacceptable accommodations” she’s been given. Um, sorry?
Chelsea feels embarrassed for him, but someone must not have told Pearce. Chelsea is not just any returning superstar. She is THE Chelsea Green. Where is her private room? Where is her fresh spring water? Where is her Swiss chocolate? Uh… Chelsea expects this to be resolved IMMEDIATELY! Okay, then he’ll get her the chocolates… The Hot Mess is back, but will she focus less on her accommodations and more on her WrestleMania plans?
Elimination Chamber Match Qualifier: Dolph Ziggler VS Bronson Reed!
The Show-Off has had his issues with Austin Theory, he’s had the US title around his waist, and now he gets to go after both! Well, if he gets through the Colossal Aussie! Will Ziggler ride a wave of momentum into Montreal? Or will he be washed away by the Tsunami?
The bell rings and the two circle. Ziggler stays low with his amateur wrestling, but Bronson grabs him and THROWS him to a corner! Bronson rushes in but Ziggler dodges and then DROPKICKS back! Bronson stays up so Ziggler SPLASHES in the corner! ZIG- NO, Bronson bucks that, and then BODY CHECKS Ziggler! Bronson storms around, drags Ziggler up, and he HEADBUTTS Ziggler back down. Bronson drags Ziggler up, scoops him and SLAMS him, then runs to STEAMROLL him! Cover, TWO! Bronson is annoyed but he drags Ziggler into a chinlock. Ziggler endures as Bronson leans on the hold.
Fans rally, Ziggler fights up, and Ziggler JAWBREAKERS free! But Bronson clamps right back on! Ziggler fights up again, to JAWBREAKER again! Bronson staggers, but he runs in, into an elbow! Ziggler BOOTS Bronson, then dodges! Bronson hits buckles, and turns around into the SATELLITE DDT! Cover, TWO! Bronson is hanging tough, but Ziggler SUPER- NO, Bronson blocks the kick to ROLLING ELBOW! Ziggler wobbles, Bronson reels him in to suplex. Ziggler slips off, ZIGZAG!! Cover, TWO!?! Bronson survives Ziggler’s best shot, but he is also dazed. Ziggler and Bronson rise, and Ziggler throws hands.
Ziggler throws knees into Bronson’s head and fans rally for Ziggler. Ziggler HEADBUTTS, kicks low, and runs, but Bronson turns Famouser into POWERBOMB! Bronson puts Ziggler in the drop zone, then climbs up top! TSUNAMI!! Cover, Bronson wins!
Winner: Bronson Reed, by pinfall (advances to the Elimination Chamber)
And that’s all Bronson needed to crush Ziggler’s hopes and dreams! Will Bronson prove he is the top dog in the Elimination Chamber?
Backstage interview with Carmella.
Cathy starts but Mella needs more excitement first. She’s Carmella! The Moonwalking, Trash Talking Princess of Staten Island, and she’s back! And she’ll be back on top where she belongs when she wins the Fatal 4 Way to get into the Elimination Chamber. Because #MellaIsMoney. And there is not a single woman- Oh, wait! Asuka walks over! Is she welcoming Mella back? Or maybe she’ll say, “Mella is not ready for Asuka!” No, Asuka. You are not ready for Mella! Paint your face up, Mella still isn’t afraid. But then Asuka has blue teeth as she grins. Mella is more grossed out than afraid, but does this mean no one is ready for THIS Asuka?
The Street Profits talk with Elias and Boogs.
They’re all excited, but then Byron walks over to ask Boogs how it feels to come back after injury. “It feels like I’m climbing a mountain, in a loin cloth, and I just wanna scream at the top of my lungs! EEEEEEEEEYAH!” But for real, being back in front of the fans is electric. It feels like he’s riding the lightning! It has been a long road of recovery, but it is official! Rick… BOOOOOGS~ is BACK! Ford fires up for that! Boogs is a maniac but Ford loves it! Dawkins says he’s also shredded, and he can shred a guitar, too! YEAH! Elias says anyone can shred, but it takes true skill to be an artist. And Boogs has that potential.
Ford wants Elias to cool it with the hating. Boogs got the dub, now he has to get dressed so they can have a night out on the town! Boogs is BOOGING OUT! New thing, booging out! Byron then asks the others that all three of them have a shot at the Elimination Chamber match for the US title. Dawkins takes on Damian Priest, Ford takes on… Elias! Whoa, Byron sure knows how to stir the pot. But Ford and Elias go back like fins on a Cadillac, but Ford promises that HE will be the one moving on. Elias says hold on, hold on. Just like Cadillacs, Elvis and Johnny Cash, Elias is an American classic. And next week, things turn around for Elias, at Ford’s expense.
Elias has GOT to be the next US Champion! Whoa, don’t sleep on ya boi. Next week, when Dawkins beats Damian, he’ll be walking into SoFi as the US Champion. WHAT?! These friends all argue, but will it be like the Rumble: every man for himself?
Cody Rhodes VS Finn Balor w/ The Judgment Day!
The American Nightmare opened the night but was interrupted, and we now have a first-time-anywhere showdown! Will Finn exterminate the so-called Bullet Club parasite? Or will the Prince learn why Cody is uncrowned wrestling royalty?
The bell rings and Cody circles with Finn. Fans rally for Cody as they feel out the grapple. They tie up, go around, end up on ropes and then in a corner. Finn and Cody end up in another corner, and then Finn shoves Cody away. The two stare down, Finn jabs Cody in the chest with a finger, but Cody kicks low and drops for the RHODES UPPERCUT! Cody then wrenches an arm, suplexes Finn up and holds him up for TEN before the GOURD BUSTER! Finn scrambles out and fans fire up with Cody. Judgment Day coaches Finn up while Raw goes picture in picture.
Finn cools off, Rhea and Priest talk trash to Cody, and then Finn goes up the steel steps. Cody patiently waits, and Finn steps back in. Cody and Finn circle, feel things out, and then tie up. Finn headlocks, Cody powers up but Finn holds on tight. Cody fights up but Finn fights the suplex. Cody powers up again but Finn again holds tight. Finn hits a takeover, Cody headscissors, but Finn shrugs that off. Finn grinds the headlock, but Cody fights up again. Cody powers out this time, things speed up, but Finn KICKS Cody away! Cody clutches the repaired pec and Finn grins, knowing he hit the mark.
Finn and Cody reset, tie up again, and Finn waistlocks to drag Cody down. Finn keeps on an arm then floats to a facelock. Cody fights up, slips around and hammerlocks Finn. Finn fights up to get the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Cody lets off, but then Cody ROCKS Finn with a right. Cody CHOPS Finn, and Finn staggers away. Cody ROCKS Finn again, whips him to ropes, but Finn reverses. Cody sunset flips, Finn rolls through but Cody blocks the boot! Cody stands up, backs Finn into a corner, and puts the leg in the ropes to KICK it! Finn hobbles and Cody CLUBS him! Cody stalks Finn to the apron and DECKS him!
Cody springboard stomps, something he really is taking from Finn! Cody whips Finn corner to corner as Raw returns to single picture. Finn goes up but Cody catches him into an Alabama! Finn CLUBS Cody, Cody sets him down, and Finn trips Cody! Cody avoids the stomp to ELBOW, then he drops. But Finn blocks the uppercut to STOMP away on the bad pec! Finn SLAMS Cody’s arm, too, and Rhea mocks Cody, “How’s that feel, Nightmare?” Fans boo but Finn soaks up the heat. Finn drags Cody up, bumps him off buckles, then CHOPS him! Finn pulls the bad arm around the ropes, but lets off as the ref counts.
Finn CHOPS Cody again, snapmares him, then runs to PENALTY KICK! Cover, TWO! Rhea argues the count but Finn keeps cool. Finn stomps Cody to ropes, then drags him over to stomp him more. Finn springboard stomps to show Cody how it’s done! And again, and again, and again! The ref counts, Finn lets off, and fans boo. Finn tells Tulsa off, then he brings Cody through the ropes. Finn kicks Cody, kicks again, but Cody blocks to DRAPING DRAGON SCREW! Then BEAUTIFUL DISASTER! Finn falls to the floor and Cody builds speed! Cody DIVES and Finn hits the desk! Cody puts Finn in, but he has to dodge Priest!
Priest tumbles into the timekeeper’s area! Dom runs in, but Cody TOSSES him over the desk! Cody gets in the ring, he dodges Finn, and then hits a SPINNING POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Mami Rhea helps Dom-Dom up, and fans fire up, “This is Awesome!” Cody CLUBS Finn, springboards, but into a waistlock! Dragon sleeper, ELBOW DROP DDT! Cover, TWO! Finn is frustrated but Raw goes picture and picture again.
Cody sits up and grits his teeth but Judgment Day soaks up the heat. Rhea even says to “SUCK IT!” Finn clamps onto Cody, and he throws down elbows! Cody wants the bad arm but Cody resists! Finn still clamps on a chicken wing, but Cody fights up to his feet! Cody arm-drags Finn away! Cody runs in, but into a do-si-do that gives Finn to COBRA TWIST! Cody endures the stretch, pries at Finn’s legs, but Finn CLUBS Cody in the side again and again! Cody still endures as Finn puts more pressure on! Cody powers out to HIP TOSS Finn away! Cody then runs to drop an elbow! Cover, TWO! Finn gets to the corner and Judgment Day is relieved.
Cody storms up to whip Finn corner to corner, then he runs in, only for the splash to hit buckles! Finn stomps Cody back down, then stomps him more. Finn goes to the corner and he climbs up while Rhea mocks Cody. Finn reaches the top, but Cody ROCKS him first! Cody climbs up to join Finn, throws forearms, but Finn hits back! They brawl up top, Cody gets the edge, and Raw returns to single picture as Cody SLAPS Finn on the back! Cody SUPERPLEXES Finn!! Both men are down and Tulsa is thunderous! Judgment Day is worried, they coach Finn up but “This is Awesome!” as both men stir.
Finn and Cody rise, and Cody ROCKS Finn! Finn ROCKS Cody! Cody ROCKS Finn! Finn ROCKS Cody! The hands go back and forth, faster and faster, and Finn kicks low! Finn soaks up the heat, runs, but Cody follows to springboard, CODY CUTTER!! Cover, TWO!! Finn survives but Cody keeps focus. Cody stands and the fans rally up! Cody dragon sleepers, but Finn slips through! But Cody drops down to KICK Finn away! But Finn SLINGBLADES on return! Finn aims from the corner, runs in, but into a SUPERKICK! Cody covers, TWO!! Judgment Day continues to worry, but fans rally up behind Cody.
Cody has Finn’s legs, “WOO~!” and FIGURE- NO, cradle! TWO!! Finn runs in, Cody trips him and steps in again, but Finn BOOTS Cody out of the ring! Cody is surrounded by Judgment Day, but then Priest spots EDGE in the crowd! Priest intercepts, Priest and Edge brawl in the crowd! Edge THROWS Priest into walls! Edge DECKS Dom on his way to ringside, and then he keeps ON Dom! Dom flounders with every haymaker and Rhea is freaking out! Edge SPEARS Dom down! But then Rhea CLOBBERS Edge!! BUT HERE COMES BETH!! The Glamazon SPEARS Rhea like she did on Saturday!!
Fans are losing their minds, and Cody brings Finn up. Finn trips Cody, to DOUBLE STOMP! Finn takes aim, SHOTGUN sends Cody into the corner! Cody is in the drop zone, Finn climbs up! Fans boo, but Edge distracts Finn! Edge hops down, Finn leaps, but Cody avoids the Coup de Grace! CROSS RHODES!! But Cody holds on, for another CROSS RHODES! AND ANOTHER CROSS RHODES!!! Cover, Cody wins!
Winner: Cody Rhodes, by pinfall
The Rated R Superstar and the Glamazon made sure Judgment Day faced some of their own medicine! Will Edge & Beth finally finish what Edge started? And now, the American Nightmare is rolling along this Road to WrestleMania! Will Cody be ready to take down the Tribal Chief?
This was really a great Raw, especially in following up the Royal Rumble. For one, they built off of just about everything from the Rumble event, and we got great stuff out of Cody Rhodes, Judgment Day and of course, Edge and Beth. Great opening promo from Cody to establish that he is going after the Undisputed Universal title, aka both belts, not just the black ‘n’ gold world title belt. Good stuff from Judgment Day, acting like Dom was even close to winning the Rumble. And we got a great main event, including Edge and Beth again getting the best of Judgment Day. We most definitely need Edge & Beth VS Rhea & Dom at the Elimination Chamber event, since we know Rhea’s plans.
I was rather surprised Rhea chose Charlotte Flair, but her logic is also 100% spot on as to why she wants Charlotte. As such, it makes sense that Adam Pearce brings in a couple (currently) SmackDown superstars to fill out the Raw Women’s Championship Elimination Chamber match. Raquel and Liv have been building momentum on SmackDown, they’re great choices, and Nikki Cross has always been solid so good to see her get the nod. Carmella and Asuka are back, and they had a good promo together. Mella has reset back to her original gimmick, which is fitting since Asuka is being more like “Kana,” her persona in Japan. That Fatal 4 Way is going to be hard to call, but if Mella is back and she’s already had interaction with Asuka, it’d make sense if Mella got in.
Chelsea Green also had a good bit with Pearce, acting entitled given how strong she was going in Impact Wrestling. Great match out of Candice VS Sky, even with the ever constant overbooking of DMG CTRL getting involved. And then a great promo segment from Bayley and Becky. Becky taking out Kai & Sky offscreen some time before this was a nice touch, and Becky scaring Bayley into accepting the cage match was good stuff. It does seem pretty fitting to have this supposed blow-off in Orlando, maybe that cage match should be the main event. And while Sky beat Candice, she lost to Mia, so maybe we’ll get a tag title match come Elimination Chamber.
Rick Boogs being back was unexpected, and having him beat Miz while Miz is in his suit was good stuff. Great qualifying matches for the US Championship Elimination Chamber match. Rollins was a natural choice, but great match with Gable. I also like that Otis has oddly caught they eye of Maxxine Dupri now that MMM has moved over to Raw. As ridiculous as the male modeling agency gimmick is, they might as well lean into it and have Maxxine make round mound Otis into her masterpiece project. Great win for Bronson over Ziggler, and great win for Gargano over Corbin. Lumis with the hatchet was hilarious, especially with Corey being horrified by it.
And great locker room promo from Boogs, the Profits, and Elias. Elias and Boogs both being musical gimmicks, I am very confident they’ll be in a program on the Road to WrestleMania. And while Priest likely beats Dawkins to get into the Chamber, I would love for Ford to get in there. It’ll be a great showing for Ford as a singles guy, and could you just imagine seeing his From the Heavens frog splash off the top of a pod? That’d be an amazing moment all by itself. But also, good VIP Lounge segment from Theory, MVP and Lashley. Lashley accidentally hitting MVP adds a bit to their story, but I think Lashley is getting in the Chamber, too.
I don’t see Lashley winning the Chamber, but he could do most of the damage for Theory to capitalize on. And as I said before, Lashley VS Lesnar at Mania isn’t going to be about a title, so therefore Lashley doesn’t need to have a title on him. Depending on how this Hurt Business 2.0 goes, maybe Lashley moves over to SmackDown to start fresh.
My Score: 8.7/10
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Mitchell’s AEW Dynamite Results & Report! (3/22/23)
Independence is Dynamite!
Dream matches, grudge matches, title matches, oh my!
The AEW World Tag Team Championships, Moxley VS Grayson, Hook VS Stokely under NO DISQUALIFICATIONS, and Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo, all on one night!
- Six Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Darby Allin & Sting VS The Superbad Squad; Cassidy, Darby & Sting win.
- AEW World Tag Team Championships: The Gunns VS Top Flight; The Gunns win and retain the titles.
- No Disqualifications: Hook VS Stokely Hathaway; Hook wins.
- Jon Moxley w/ Wheeler Yuta & Claudio Castagnoli VS Stu Grayson w/ The Dark Order; Moxley wins.
- Toni Storm w/ The Outcasts VS Skye Blue; Storm wins.
- Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo; Omega wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
There’s a medical emergency backstage!
Hangman Page is on the phone with someone while Brandon Cutler gets in the ambulance. Cutler tells Hangman to make sure someone’s with Nick, meaning MATT Jackson is in the ambulance! The ambulance drives away, and now Nick is loaded into a second! The Young Bucks were attacked before cameras were rolling, Don Callis calms Kenny Omega down, and Hangman rides with Nick. Omega has his main event match with AAA rival El Hijo del Vikingo, but who went after his best friends?
Six Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Darby Allin & Sting VS The Superbad Squad!
Freshly Squeezed is still a champion, as he retained the now AEW International Championship in Canada. But now, a familiar foe is rearing his Superbad head once again. Kip Sabian is bringing Butcher & Blade with him to go after Cassidy while his Best Friends are down and out. But will Cassidy’s new pals be more than enough to turn back the Superbad Squad?
The trios sort out and Cassidy starts against Kip. Fans rally and chant for “FRESHLY SQUEEZED!” but Kip copies Cassidy putting his hands up. Cassidy rushes in, Kip gets around and waistlocks to headlock. Cassidy powers out, headlocks back, but Kip powers out, only for Cassidy to slip around and headlock again. Kip powers out, things speed up and Cassidy arm-drags, but Kip cartwheels through! Kip mocks Cassidy, Cassidy rushes in but Kip dumps him out. Kip fakes Cassidy out with an Arabian Press, then he mocks putting his hands up again. Cassidy rushes back in, dodges Kip now, and sends him out!
Cassidy mocks Kip, then puts his hands up. To put his hands in his pockets! Kip rushes in, Cassidy dodges and SHOTGUNS! Cassidy kips up and fans fire up, but Kip scrambles away to tag in Butcher. Butcher eggs Cassidy on, but fans cheer as Cassidy tags in STIIIING! The Icon steps to Andy Williams and Andy talks trash. Butcher swings a forearm, but Sting just brushes it off! Butcher throws another forearm, but then Sting counter punches! And back hands! And punches again! Sting kicks low, ROCKS Butcher, then fires off in the corner. But Butcher claws at the eyes! The fans boo but Butcher BITES Sting’s forehead!
Butcher BLASTS Cassidy and Darby, then mocks Sting’s howl. Butcher runs, but misses the splash! Sting runs to hit the STINGER SPLASH! Fans fire up as Sting snapmares and gets the legs! But Blade and Kip attack! Fans boo but Darby and Cassidy fight them off! Kip throws Cassidy out, Blade scoops and dumps Darby out, then the Superbad Squad coordinates. Butcher & Blade reel Sting in, Butcher tags Kip, and then they DOUBLE SUPLEX Sting! Kip goes up the corner, but Sting slow rolls away, a la Cassidy! Speaking of Cassidy, he and Darby go after Butcher & Blade on the outside! Fans fire up but Kip is frustrated.
Kip storms over to another corner and climbs up again, but Sting slow rolls the other way! Fans fire up, Darby reaches out and makes the tag! Kip leaps, Darby gets under to SLAP, HEADBUTT, roll and CODE RED! Cover, TWO! Kip is still in this and Penelope Ford gets on the apron! The ref reprimands her while Darby whips Kip. Kip reverses, Darby goes up the ropes, but Blade trips him up! Darby hits the mat hard, Kip stomps away, and fans boo while AEW goes picture in picture.
Kip drags Darby up while Butcher sends Cassidy into barriers! Kip hits a FISHERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO! Tag to Blade, the squad mugs Darby, then they send him into a corner. Blade runs in to CHOP! And CHOP! And then snapmare to PENATLY KICK! Cover, TWO! Blade drags Darby over, tags in Butcher, and they DOUBLE HEADBUTT Darby down. Butcher drags Darby up to CHOP him back down. Butcher drags Darby up to bump him off buckles, then he tags Kip. Kip stomps Darby, then taunts Sting. The ref reprimands Kip but that allows Blade to CHOKE Darby! Kip howls, tags Blade, and the mugging continues.
Blade brings Darby up to ROCK him with a forearm. Blade brings Darby around to whip him to ropes, to then POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Tag to Butcher, he stomps Darby, then ties up the legs. Darby throws hands from below, but Butcher still drags him into a TEXAS CLOVERLEAF! Darby endures, claws his way around, but even Penelope taunts him with shouting, “TAP! TAP!” Dynamite returns to single picture as Darby crawls towards his corner, only for Blade to swing him out into a POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO! Darby survives but Butcher tags Kip. Kip drags Darby up to wrench an arm and whip. Darby uses that to BLAST Butcher & Blade!
Kip runs in, blocks Darby’s boot and spins Darby around to back suplex. Darby lands on his feet, but his knee jams! Darby crawls and scrambles, but Kip drags him back! Kip catches Darby, Blade trips Sting! Blade sends Sting into barriers! Darby sunset flips Kip, Kip stays up so Darby lets him go to hot tag Cassidy! Fans are thunderous as Cassidy eggs Kip on! Kip rushes Cassidy but gets a buckle bump! Cassidy goes up top, and CROSSBODIES! Cassidy keeps moving, he ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl DDT! And kip up! Fans are thunderous again as Cassidy gives Kip those “devastating” kicks! But then Butcher runs in to CLOBBER Cassidy!
Fans boo and the ref reprimands, but Butcher brings Cassidy up. Butcher lifts but Cassidy fights the bomb! Blade gets in, they DRAG THE LAKE!! Kip covers, TWO!! Cassidy survives and Kip is furious! Kip howls, runs and CANNONBALLS! Fans boo but Kip soaks it all up. Kip is too busy having fun, he misses Cassidy tag STIIIIING! Sting walks up to give those same “devastating” kicks! Kip thinks it’s Cassidy, and turns around into quite the surprise. Sting “beats” his chest, Kip swings, but into a LARIAT! Sting really fires up, and he rallies on the Superbad Squad! Kip springboards, but Sting catches him! SCORPION DEATHLOCK!!
Ford freaks out, Blade gets up and throws hands, but Sting doesn’t flinch! Butcher adds on, the 2v1 is too much and Kip gets free. But Darby returns to fire off on Butcher & Blade! Butcher blocks one, CLUBS Darby and then hoists Darby up. Darby BOOTS Blade, BITES Butcher’s hand, then runs to DOUBLE COFFIN SPLASH! Butcher & Blade bail out but Darby builds speed, into Kip’s body shot! Kip avoids Orange’s punch, to suplex, STUN-DOG MILLIONAIRE! Then Cassidy DIVES to take out Blade! Darby hops up to THROWBACK STUNNER on Kip, then he DIVES into Butcher!
Sting has Kip in the dragon sleeper, and fans are thunderous for the SCORPION DEATH DROP!! Cover, Sting’s team wins!
Winners: Sting, Darby Allin & Orange Cassidy
A huge win for the unlikeliest of trios, and Cassidy adorns Sting with the sunglasses! As for Darby, he is looking at the Double or Nothing banner. The Relentless One wants at MJF and the gold, will he be living it up in Las Vegas?
AEW shares backstage footage from last week.
After having his “Re-Bar-Mitzvah” interrupted by Darby Allin, Sammy Guevara and “Jungle Boy” Jack Perry, it was obvious Maxwell Jacob Friedman was mad. He curses up a storm, then says he is the world champion! But Darby Allin says the world title means much more than money and fame. It is him being him. And Jack Perry, for himself, his family, and everyone who supported him all this time, he is going to become champion on his own. Sammy says that the world title is his destiny! He said so since episode ONE of Dynamite that he is going to be world champion. But MJF says that’s not how it works! You don’t waltz up to the champ and call your shot, you EARN it!
MJF has beaten Darby, Sammy and JB once each in 1v1 competition in their AEW careers, and he tells them they have to become #1 contender. Good luck trying, because all three of them SUCK! Sammy says he’ll win as many matches as it takes to get that belt off MJF. JB says that you can check the record books. He’s already won more matches than any of them. Darby says he’s beaten Sammy and he’s beaten JB, so he will stop at nothing to make sure that MJF is no longer champion. Who of these three Young Pillars of AEW will be THE one that challenges MJF at Double or Nothing?
AEW takes a closer look at tonight’s main event dream match.
Excalibur narrates that, “In 2021, there was no one hotter in professional wrestling than Kenny Omega. Known as ‘The Belt Collector,’ Omega won championships around the world, including in Mexico, where he won the AAA Mega Championship. At the same time, El Hijo del Vikingo was quickly establishing himself as one of the premier luchadors in all of Mexico. A match was made for December 2021: Vikingo, Omega, for the first time ever for the AAA Mega Championship. Unfortunately, Omega’s injuries at Full Gear were so severe, they required surgery, keeping him out of action for nearly a year.
“Now, with Omega back at 100%, the dream match is on for tonight. Kenny Omega, El Hijo del Vikingo, live!” Who will come out as truly the best today?
AEW World Tag Team Championships: The Gunns VS Top Flight!
They may not be the Young Bucks, the Lucha Brothers or the Hardy Boyz, but Austin & Colten are the brother tag team reigning over AEW. But will they soon find out they are not nearly as good as they think they are? Or will the Gunns cause the Coldest Tag Team in the Game to melt down?
The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see who is really the better brother duo!
The teams sort out, Austin starts against Dante, and Independence taunts the “ASS~ BOYS!” Austin tunes that out, knuckle locks with Dante, and then he CHOPS! Austin goes up and up, but then says no no no. Austin hops down, swings on Dante, but misses! Dante knuckle locks and CHOPS, then he goes up and up and FLYING ARM-DRAGS! Dante kips up and fans fire up! Austin tags Colten, but Dante arm-drags Colten down! Tag to Darius, the Martins double whip and speed things up, to then DROPKICK Colten down! Austin runs in, but into a DROPKICK! The Gunns regroup, but the Martins double clothesline them up and out!
Fans fire up as Dante says they’re getting those belts. The “ASS~ BOYS!” regroup and Colten slides back in. Tag to Austin, he and Dante circle again, and Austin gets around to shove Dante to ropes. Dante BLASTS Colten before the cheap shot! Dante then goes up and over Austin, only for Austin to pull hair! The ref reprimands, but misses Colten HOTSHOT Dante down! Fans boo as Austin stomps and Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Austin whips Dante out of the ring, then taunts Darius to distract the ref. Colten stomps away on Dante! Colten puts Dante in before anyone notices, and Austin bumps Dante off buckles. Tag to Colten, he stomps Dante, but lets off as the ref reprimands. Colten stomps some more, he and Austin taunt Independence and Darius, then Colten drags Dante up. Colten DECKS Dante, then mocks the fans. Colten ROCKS Dante, ROCKS him again, then suplexes. Cover, TWO! Colten stays between the Martin brothers, drags Dante over and bumps him off buckles. Tag to Austin, he stomps Dante now, then digs his boots in.
The ref reprimands but Austin mocks the fans rallying for Dante. Austin lets off and Colten CHOKES Dante! Colten lets off Dante before he gets caught, and Austin tags Colten in. Colten drags Dante up, whips him to ropes, and the Gunns body shot, knee lift and LARIAT! Cover, TWO! Colten stays between the Martins again, drags Dante up and whips him to the corner. Colten runs in but Dante dodges the splash! Austin tags in and hurries to stop Dante. Austin shoves Dante down, but Dante fakes Austin out to go under! Austin still grabs a leg, tags Colten back in, and the Gunns double back suplex! But Dante lands on his feet!
Dynamite returns to single picture, Dante goes over Austin, over Colten, and tags in Darius! Darius rallies on the Gunns and fans fire up! Darius hits an atomic drop on Austin, then LARIATS Colten! Mule kick for Austin, and Darius whips him at Colten. Austin reverses but Darius uses that to UPPERCUT Colten! Austin runs back in, but is sent into Colten! Darius uses Austin to get up and ENZIGURI Colten! Darius then GERMAN SUPLEXES Austin, and STANDING SPANISH FLIES Colten! Cover, TWO! Fans rally as Darius drags Colten up. Tag to Dante, Top Flight double whip, but Colten ducks and tags Austin!
Darius leaps to CROSSBODY Colten! Austin runs in, but into a hall nelson SLAM! cover, TWO!! Dante keeps cool, he goes to the corner, but Colten grabs his leg! Dante kicks Colten away, Darius DIVES onto Colten to hit him into railing! Dante GAMANGIRIS Austin, goes up and up and NOSEDIVES!! Cover, Colten breaks it!! Fans boo but Colten was within the rules. Wait, is that THE KINGDOM!? Mike Bennett & Matt Taven are mugging Darius over their ROH losses! But Dante FLIES out onto them! Direct hit and fans fire up! Dante hurries back up, springboards again, but Austin gets under!
Colten gets in, Dante runs into a 3:10 TO YUMA!! Cover, the Gunns win!
Winners: The Gunns, by pinfall (still AEW World Tag Team Champions)
Fans boo that the Gunns win, but Darius is pissed at The Kingdom! Darius chases off Mike & Matt, will Top Flight get revenge in ROH? As for the Gunns, they hear FTR coming! Fans fire up again as Dax Harwood & Cash Wheeler step out on stage with mics in their hands! Colten gets a mic to have the FTR music stop. Colten says no one wants to hear that song and no one wants to see FTR. Fans boo because they disagree. FTR says they’re not here to fight. They’re here to talk business. Well, no one wants to hear you talk! The Gunns don’t like or respect FTR. And guess what? FTR are LOSERS! They lost three sets of belts, and lost to the Gunns!
There is nothing FTR can say or offer them to get a rematch. NOTHING! Nothing? So like, if they said they’ll never challenge the Gunns again for those titles should they lose- NO! Do you not hear what Austin is saying, “you hillbillies? NOTHING! There’s NOTHING! What do you have to offer?! NOTHING!!” Then if the Gunns wanna prove their first win wasn’t a fluke, should they win against FTR again, FTR will never tag together in AEW again. Oh, the break up? So heartbreaking! LOOK AT HIS FACE! NOTHING!! Okay, okay. Dax says if FTR can’t beat the Gunns to win the AEW World Tag Team Championships, FTR will just quit AEW.
Fans boo, but it seems that got through to the Gunns. If the Gunns beat FTR again, FTR leaves AEW forever? Yes, that’s what Dax said. Well, in that case, deal! The Gunns and FTR shake on it, but then Gunns literally spin in FTR’s faces! The Gunns run for it, but the match is coming either way. Will the “ASS~ BOYS!” get their asses kicked? Or will they be the team that banishes FTR from AEW?
Backstage interview with Jade Cargill, Leila Grey & Mark Sterling.
Renee Paquette is with the AEW TBS Champion, her Last Baddie Standing and her legal representation. Renee says that Taya Valkyrie is All Elite now, and she has her eye on the TBS title. What is Jade’s reaction to that? “Renee, cut the sh*t. We had this Taya girl come in and interrupt my moment to answer an open challenge that was already closed, baby girl. And then, had the audacity to use my finisher. Mark, tie this up.” Sterling has a document, it is a Cease & Desist order. This will be sent to Taya Valkyrie, telling Taya that she is no longer allowed to use the chicken wing facebuster, which is also Jade’s move, as her finisher.
Leila says that she should deliver this document to Taya personally, this Saturday on Rampage. Because she has a few words of her own for Taya. So that’s an official challenge? Yes. Welcome to #ThatBitchShow. Will La Wera Loca have a jaded response to this frivolous lawsuit?
No Disqualifications: Hook VS Stokely Hathaway!
An injured arm turned into a suspension turned into a settlement turned into a high stakes bet that The Firm lost, and now it has resulted in this match. And though Ethan Page, Matt Hardy, Isiah Kassidy, Lee Moriarty & “Big Bill” Morrissey see Stokely off, they can’t stay per the stipulations of the bet. As the introduction says, “He’s not as large as the men he represents, he has the heart of a lion and the wisdom of an owl.” But will any of that help him defeat The Cold-Hearted Handsome Devil?
As Hook makes his entrance, Stokely grabs the mic to say, “Whoa, whoa, whoa! I’ve got some breaking news! I spoke to Dr. Simpson (he means Sampson) earlier, and he said I am not medically cleared to compete. I know, I know. I wanted to so bad. And I would also, what a coinky-dink, announce that I am retiring.” What? Stokely thanks all 12 of his fands, God bless! Justin, here, doctor’s note. Make it official. Justin takes the note, and it reads, “He is SICK.” Justin says that with all due respect, that’s a receipt for Wingstop. The ref RIPS the receipt! And the bell rings! Fans fire up and Hook is ready, so Stokely bails!
Stokely runs around the ring, out to the crowd, but Hook pursues! Fans fire up as Hook chases Stokely down, drags him back, CLUBS him, then brings him over to KNEE and TOSS! Stokely ends up at ringside again and fans are thunderous! Hook stalks Stokely, Stokely runs in to UPPERCUT, but Stokely bounces off of Hook! Stokely scurries away, gets back up, and runs in, but into a leg capture! EL CAMINO to the floor! Fans fire up as Hook drags Stokely up, puts him in the ring, and then looks under the ring. Fans fire up more, because here comes a SPARE GUARD RAIL! Hook puts that in the ring while the Firm can only watch.
Hardy tries to calm the group down, Stokely can take care of himself with things getting “hardcore.” Ethan says no he can’t, they didn’t practice any of the hardcore stuff! Stokely bails out again but Hook puts the railing in a corner. Hook drags Stokely up but Stokely BLASTS Hook with the fire extinguisher! Fans boo but Stokely gets a chair! Stokely smacks the steps a couple times, he says, “I’m not a killer, but don’t push me! That’s Tupac.” Stokely hurries in, fans rally up, and Stokely swings, but Hook blocks! Hook BOOTS Stokely, then SMACKS him on the back! And again! And again! And again!
Hook throws the chair aside, Stokely is barely moving! But Hook drags Stokely up to EL CAMINO onto the railing! The railing BENDS! Hook drags Stokely off the railing, covers, but then pulls him up at TWO! Hook wants REDRUM!!! Stokely is OUT, Hook wins!
Winner: Hook, by submission
The FTW Champion could’ve ended it sooner, but he chose to teach Stokely a lesson: Do not get on Hook’s bad side. Hardy says Ethan must avenge Stokely! Ethan can beat Hook! Hardy is gonna get a match made right now! All Ego is ready, but will he be ready when they #SendHook?
Adam Cole is here!
Fans fire up as the Undisputed One heads to the ring. Naturally, everyone joins in on the “BOOM!” and “ADAM COLE BAYBAY!” Cole gets the mic and says, “Wow. Hey, hey, I think I know the answer to this, but who’s ready for Storytime with Adam Cole, baybay?” Everyone cheers! Cole continues with, “Seven days. We are just seven days away from me making my in-ring return here in AEW. And listen, I know I’ve talked a ton about my struggles and what I went through, but as far as how I’m feeling right now? Guys, I feel freaking great. I have never been more ready, never been more prepared, to get back in this ring, doing what I love, and that is wrestle for AEW.”
Fans are fired up, and Cole knows everyone has questions. “The biggest one being: Who is my opponent going to be on March 29th?” Fans echo, “Who? Who? Who?” Cole starts to speak, but here comes Daniel Garcia! Fans boo as Red Death has the mic to say, “Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Who’s ready for Storytime with Daniel Garcia, baybay?” Garcia knows Cole’s been gone awhile, so here’s an update on a few things. Fans tell Garcia to STFU already but Garcia says since Cole’s been gone, Garcia’s become a real veteran in AEW. All the boys in the back respect him so much that he is a locker room leader!
Fans boo more but Garcia says as locker room leader, it is his duty to come out here to not only welcome Cole back, but to put him in his place, too. Garcia says Cole may not remember, but here’s an update on what Garcia’s been doing the last nine months while Cole was home, “playing stupid video games on Twitch.” Cole smirks but allows it. Brody King: beat him! Ricky Starks: beat him! Bryan Danielson: Garcia beat him, too. Garcia’s main-evented more AEW programming over the past year than anyone else on the roster! Garcia is the lifeblood that pumps through this company. And he’s to respect Cole? To welcome Cole back? Where’s Garcia’s warm welcome?
Where is Garcia’s respect when he’s been here, been doing this, and proved himself as one of the best pro-wrest- Oops. Freudian slip there? Garcia corrects himself, “Sports entertainers on the planet today!” That’s what Garcia is! So what makes Cole so special? “What makes me special? When they ring the freakin’ bell, that’s what makes me special! That’s what makes m e special.” Cole admits he likes Garcia. Garcia is really, really good. And some day, he could be leading the charge in AEW. The problem is the company he keeps.
“The Jericho Appreciation Society, they’ve done a great job of giving you this false sense of security. This overconfidence, which sometimes is good, and sometimes is bad. But let me remind you, even me not wrestling for nine months, I am still Adam Cole Baybay. I am a multi-time world champion. I have traveled the globe, fought and beat some of the very best! As a matter of fact, while I was sitting at home for nine months, I was wondering if I’d ever get the chance to wrestle again, hoping, praying, willing to do anything for a second chance. And looks like I found that second chance.”
Fans fire up and Cole says if Garcia is crazy enough to want the match, then dammit, he’s on! Adam Cole VS Daniel Garcia, first-time-ever, next week on Dynamite! But Cole will remind Garcia of something: “This is not just my return match; this is a statement. It’s a statement to the entire locker room that one of the best damn pro-wrestlers on the planet is BACK, baybay.” Fans are fired up for “ADAM COLE! ADAM COLE!” Cole hopes Garcia realizes what he’ sin for. Because Cole promises next week will be a great night. A great night for Cole, for the fans, but for Garcia… Not so much. “See you next week, Garcia. BOOM.”
Cole is ready, Garcia is ready, but will the Dragonslayer stay a great sports enner-tay-ners? Or will the pro-wrestler in him rise to the surface against one of the greatest pro-wrestlers alive today?
Alex Marvez is outside The Elite’s locker room.
Marvez can hear a conversation going on inside, and he steps inside. Callis and Omega are talking, and Callis wants Marvez to hold on. What is Omega’s concern here? Omega’s concern is that his best friends left in an ambulance! He should’ve gone with them! Callis says he sent Cutler and Nakazawa with them. Omega has a match tonight! Hear Callis out. He’s a glass half full kind of guy. Injuries happen, but hear him out. The Bucks going to the hospital might’ve been the best thing for Omega and Callis. It allows for focus! Omega is in a singles match, the God of Pro-Wrestling is back! “Those kids will be fine in a few months.”
Callis now has Marvez join in. “Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo is gonna blow the roof off! The God of Pro-Wrestling is BACK, and it starts tonight on Dynamite! Now get out.” Marvez throws this back to ringside, but is Callis only thinking of his benefit, not Kenny’s?
Jon Moxley w/ The Blackpool Combat Club VS Stu Grayson w/ The Dark Order!
The Maniac, along with Claudio Castagnoli & Wheeler Yuta, have torn into the Dark Order from Silver to Reynolds to Evil Uno. They did all that to anger Hangman Page, but they’ve also angered #PlayerTwo! Moxley may be #ForgedByCombat, but will he survive someone born and bred for combat?
The bell rings and Stu RAMS Moxley into a corner! Fans fire up as Stu fires off on Moxley but lets off as the ref counts. Moxley turns things around to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP! Moxley pie faces Stu, but Stu turns things around to CHOP back! Stu stalks Moxley to another corner, KNEES him and CLUBS him, then stalks him to a third corner. Moxley kicks low, ROCKS Stu with a forearm, then another, then digs his boots in. The ref counts, Moxley steps off at 4, then Moxley drags Stu up to headlock takeover. Stu keeps his shoulders up, the Dark Order coaches him up but Moxley gets a knuckle lock cover. TWO as Stu gets his left arm up.
Moxley pushes the hand down, covers, TWO as Stu gets the right arm up. Moxley pushes that arm down again, covers, ONE as Stu gets his left arm back up. Stu fights to his feet but Moxley kicks low. Moxley headlocks, Stu powers out but Moxley RAMS him! Moxley runs, but Stu RAMS him! Moxley runs in, clips Stu but is sent out of the ring. Stu hurries out after Moxley, Moxley throws a chair! Stu avoids it, ROCKS Moxley and puts him in the ring. Moxley kicks back, but Stu RANAS! Stu fires forearms, CHOPS Moxley in the corner, then throws knees. Stu whips corner to corner, Moxley reverses and avoids the up ‘n’ over!
Moxley reels Stu in for a SAIDO! Stu staggers up but then flops out to the apron. Moxley runs to BLAST Stu off and to the barriers! Moxley flips Stu off while Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Yuta & Claudio taunt Stu as the ring count climbs. The Dark Order coaches Stu up and he gets in the ring at 5 of 10, but Moxley is right on him. Stu throws a forearm, then another, and another, and another! But Moxley ROCKS Stu with just one! Stu falls over and Claudio yawns. It seems this isn’t competitive enough for the Swiss Superman. Moxley has the legs, he stomps Stu in the stomach, then ties the legs up. But Stu fights back with fists! Moxley still powers Stu into the TEXAS CLOVERLEAF! Stu endures as Moxley sits deep, and he reaches out to the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Moxley lets off at 4.
Moxley drags Stu up to CHOP, but Stu CHOPS back! Stu fires forearms, whips, and DROPKICKS Moxley! Moxley goes to a corner, Stu is after hm with a whip, but Moxley reverses to clothesline! Moxley then brings Stu out to X-PLEX! Moxley paces around, the BCC applauds, but the Dark Order coaches Stu. Moxley reels Stu in, lifts him, and hooks the legs to hit the GOTCH PILEDRIVER! Cover, TWO!! Stu is still in this, but Moxley has the knuckle locks back. Dynamite returns to single picture as Moxley rains down the DRAGON STOMPS! Cover, TWO!! Stu hangs tough again, but Moxley just taunts him.
Fans rally, Stu rises, and Moxley KICKS him in the chest! And KICKS him again! Moxley eggs Stu on, then KICKS him more! Moxley SLAPS Stu! Stu snarls and stands up to fire off forearms! Stu whips, Moxley reverses but Stu CLOBBERS him! Stu dodges, tilt-o-whirls and REVERSE DDTS! Then he rains down HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! Fans fire up as Stu gives Moxley a taste of his own medicine! And then the SIDE EFFECT! SPRINGBOARD MARIPOSA! Cover, TWO!! Moxley survives and Stu grows frustrated. Stu hurries up a corner, but Yuta distracts! Fans boo but the Dark Order storm up on the BCC!
Stu decides to change course, he ARIHARA MOONSAULTS onto Yuta & Claudio! But Moxley DIVES onto Stu! Moxley puts Stu in the ring, hurries after him, but Stu BOOTS Moxley down! Stu hurries back up top, for the 450 SPLASH!! Cover, TWO!! Moxley survives again and Stu is shocked! But Stu slashes the throat and drags Moxley up. Torture rack, but Moxley slips off right into the BULLY CHOKE!! Stu endures, but he’s turning red! Moxley shifts to the facelock to throw in KNEE after KNEE! Then he shifts to the REAR NAKED CHOKE! But Stu fights up to his feet! Fans fire up but Stu is fading again!
But Stu is still on his feet, and he revives! BACKPACK CANNONBALL!! Both men crash into buckles and Stu is free! Fans are thunderous again and Moxley sputters back to his feet. Moxley brings Stu up, but Stu slips out of the underhooks! PELE!! Moxley falls down and the BCC coach him up. Stu goes back to a corner, climbs back up top, but Moxley ROCKS him first! Moxley climbs, CLUBS away on Stu, then CLAWS Stu’s back. Moxley HEADBUTTS Stu, brings him up into underhooks! SUPER DEATH RIDER!! Cover, Moxley wins!!
Winner: Jon Moxley, by pinfall
The Dark Order hurry into the ring and Moxley backs off, there won’t be any extracurriculars here. But will the Dark Order ever get payback on the mean SOBs in the BCC?
Backstage interview with Ricky Starks.
Renee says she can feel the frustration coming off The Absolute. The back ‘n’ forth with him and Juice Robinson, where do they stand? You tell him! Starks is “sick and tired of talking back and forth. No action, all talk.” Starks doesn’t wanna stand around, take time off his vacation, just to say Juice, he doesn’t like that you attacked him from behind. That’s cool and all, but whatever! How about this, though? Saturday Night Rampage, Starks is done talking. If Juice wants to face him man to man, then he can find Starks on Rampage! If not, just stop! Starks is over it, he is so sick of it! This is the craziest thing he’s been a part of his whole life!
Starks is issuing the open challenge to Juice. If Juice accepts it or not, is a man or not, Starks doesn’t give a damn anymore. The Absolute will be waiting, but will the Booster oblige?
AEW presents an all-new episode of QTV!
QT Marshall says great job last week in their debut, keep the “credibility train” rolling. CHOO-CHOO~! He needs scoops! Harley Cameron says she actually has discovered a “hot new prospect.” Goes by the name of Rey Fenix. And actually, here’s some footage. Hobbs POUNCING Fenix into buckles int heir TNT title match, and the spinebuster, and the Town Business. Everyone has a laugh, and QT says, “Imagine being in the Lucha Brothers, and your own lucha brother doesn’t come out to help you.” Aaron Solo says there is definitely some miedo! Then he laughs while also puffing mouth spray…?
QT asks who the hecc is Alex Abrahantes? Harley says Alex should work on his “character development.” Speaking of, how about Solo stealing Wardlow’s identity and freezing all of his accounts? Oopsie~! Yeah, Wardlow’s gonna lose his house and car, too! And Solo hacked into some observer’s accounts, started this whole thing about hotels. HAHA! QT just got a call from Hobbs. This Saturday on Rampage, another Open Challenge for the TNT title! Can’t wait to see who is the next chapter in the Book of Hobbs. Well, wait no longer! PENTA wants payback for Fenix as he answers the call! Will Hobbs be the one with some fear?
Toni Storm w/ The Outcasts VS Skye Blue!
The Lightning From Down Under has been striking down “spoiled rookies” again and again, but in the Dark. Will she do so again in the spotlight of Dynamite? Or will Skye roll the Storm away?
The bell rings and Storm BLASTS Skye with a forearm! Then she stomps a mudhole into Skye in the corner! The ref counts, Storm lets off but she grins and soaks up the heat. Soho & Saraya mock Skye, then Storm bumps her off buckles., Skye elbows back, fires forearms in return, and the fans fire up! But Storm knees low! Storm whips Skye, Skye kicks back! Skye ROCKS Storm again and again, but Storm shoves her away. Skye comes back, spins Storm for a KNEE SMASH and a DROPKICK! Storm bails out, fans fire up and Skye goes to the apron! FLYING RANA! Fans fire up with Skye but Saraya is mad.
Skye puts Storm in the ring, climbs up the corner, but Storm ROCKS her! Skye falls to the apron, then Storm HIP ATTACKS Skye to the floor! Storm distracts the ref, allowing Soho & Saraya to stomp away on Skye! Fans boo but the Outcasts get away with it! Saraya says, “This is OUR house!” Storm goes out to fetch Skye, and RAMS her into the apron. Storm CHOPS Skye against the post, then bumps her off the other. Storm CHOPS Skye again! Saraya says do it again! Storm puts some stank on this one, but Skye ducks, so the chop hits POST! Saraya & Soho panic as Storm clutches her fingers! Skye then runs in, but Storm dodges so Soho gets DECKED!
Storm CLOBBERS Skye from behind while the ring count climbs. Storm refreshes the ring count, Saraya shouts at Skye, and Storm CHOPS Skye again. Storm stalks Skye around the way as Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Storm drags Skye around to snap suplex her to the floor! Storm flexes, perhaps taunting Jamie Hayter wherever she’s watching this from, and then she goes back for Skye. Storm puts Skye in the ring, flexes more, then drags Skye up. Storm whips Skye to ropes, BOOTS her down, covers, ONE! Cover again, TWO! Another cover, TWO!! Skye is still in this but Storm clamps on with a full nelson. Storm leans on the hold, thrashes Skye around, but Skye endures. Skye fights up, but Storm throws her down by her hair! The ref reprimands but Storm just stalks Skye. Storm kicks Skye around, has her in the corner, and digs her boot in.
The ref counts, Storm stomps but lets off at 4. Storm drags Skye up to snap suplex! Storm grins then stalks Skye. Storm drags Skye up to snap suplex again! Storm flexes more, stalks Skye to another corner, then wrenches her hair to TOSS her across the way! The ref reprimands but Storm just wrenches hair and TOSSES Skye again! Dynamite returns to single picture as Storm soaks up the heat. But Skye shoves Storm down! And then TOSSES Storm by her hair! And again! Skye fires up, runs corner to corner, but Storm puts her on the apron. Skye ROUNDHOUSES! Skye climbs up, to CROSSBODY!
Fans fire up, Skye keeps moving, she ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl headscissor! Storm ends up on ropes, Skye runs to SHINING WIZARD! Snapmare and SUPER- NO, Storm blocks and spins Skye, but Skye BASEMENT ENZIGURIS! Cover, TWO!! Storm survives and Skye grows frustrated. Saraya & Soho are also frustrated, they rally for Storm but the fans rally for Skye. Saraya tells the fans to shut up! Skye runs, hops on, but Storm shrugs her off! Skye SUPERKICKS! Skye runs, into a THESZ PRESS! Storm rains down fists, then she snarls as she stands back up. Storm gets the legs, but Skye kicks her away!
Skye runs in, only for Storm to spin her around! Storm uses the ropes, TORNADO DDT! Cover, TWO!! Skye survives and fans fire up! Saraya is furious but the ref says the count was fair. Skye goes to a corner but Storm says kiss this. SWEET HIP- NO, Skye picks the ankle! Skye KNEES Storm, runs, avoids Soho’s swipe, and she hits CODE BLUE!! But Soho is still distracting the ref!! Skye would’ve had this if not for Soho! Skye gets in Soho’s face, swings at her, but Storm runs in! Skye sends Storm into Soho, rolls and bridges, TWO!!! Storm stands, into a BOOT! Skye full nelsons, Storm arm-drags free to SHOTGUN Skye down!
Saraya says Storm has this now! Storm says kiss this, and here comes SWEET HIP MUSIC!! GERMAN SUPLEX, and then STORM ZERO!! Cover, Storm wins!
Winner: Toni Storm, by pinfall
The Outcasts with the assist, but now they bring out the spray paint! Fans boo as the Outcast scare off the ref, then surround Skye! But here comes Riho and Willow! Just like last week, Riho has the pipe!! Riho runs the Outcast off and warns them. The Outcasts leave for now, having gotten the win. Will Riho, Willow and Skye start thinking of sticking together from now on?
The AEW medical staff checks on Stu Grayson.
They’re working on his left arm, where did they feel it pop? But then Moxley sneaks up to say, “It’s just business.” And he puts on the SLEEPER!! Claudio & Yuta TOSS the medics aside! Stu is all alone as Moxley chokes him out, then SMACKS him off a trunk! The BCC give Stu the icepack back then leave, what will Hangman & the Dark Order have to say about this?
Kenny Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo!
The AAA Mega Championship match that was meant to happen in December of 2021 was denied because of injury and misfortune. But now we are all fortunate enough to have this match happen here! “HE was the longest reigning Mega Champion at 765 days, 292 days more than El Hijo del Vikingo. HE never lost that title. HE is undefeated in singles matches in Mexico and also on Dynamite. Many people say HE is also undefeated at life. HE is often complimented on his accomplishments, matches, chiseled physique and hair, yet he is personally proud of his win-loss record in Independence, Missouri, which is better than his record of 1-1 in… NOOOORTH CAROLINA~!
“He arrives tonight after his 833 mile journey from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. Weighing 224 pounds, HE is…! KENNY! OOOOOOOOOOOOMEEEEGAAAAAA~!” The fans go wild for the Cleaner, the Best Bout Machine, and Don Callis’ God of Pro-Wrestling, but will Omega prove he is better than the Mega Champion?
But as Omega makes his way down the ramp, El Hijo del Vikingo DIVES onto him! Fans fire up, EHDV throws off his cape, then he runs again, to FLY! Direct hit again and Independence is thunderous! EHDV puts Omega in the ring, springboards and MISSILE DROPKICKS! Omega ends up in a corner, EHDV runs in to clothesline! EHDV fires off forearms, but Omega turns it around to fire them back! The ref wants them to let off, this isn’t a match yet! Omega rains down fists, lets off, and now the bell rings! Fans are thunderous as Omega stomps EHDV down. Omega drags EHDV up, whips him corner to corner, but EHDV slips out to the apron!
Omega hits buckles, then EHDV ENZIGURIS! And GAMANGIRIS! EHDV climbs up, and jumps to IMPOLODER DRAGONRANA! Omega goes flying, then staggers up into the SCREW HIGH KICK! Omega’s on the ropes, EHDV runs to DOUBLE KNEE him through the ropes! Omega falls to the floor, EHDV refreshes the count, and fans say “This is Awesome!” EHDV SHOOTING STAR PRESSES to the floor! A bit double-edged, but fans lose their minds! Callis protests, the ring count climbs, but EHDV puts Omega in the ring. EHDV aims, slingshots and then springboards to 450 SPLASH! Cover, TWO!!
Omega goes to a corner, EHDV runs in to GAMANGIRI again! Omega staggers away, EHDV pursues but Omega CHOPS! And CHOPS again! EHDV falls over but Omega stalks him to a corner. Omega brings EHDV up to JAB! And JAB! fans rally and duel, Omega drags EHDV up to whip. Omega scoops EHDV for a tilt-o-whirl BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Omega drags EHDV back up fast, to fisherman BUSTER! Cover, TWO! EHDV hangs tough and Omega is frustrated but the fans are loving this. Omega stalks EHDV to the ropes, scrapes him to the apron, and then Omega goes out to follow EHDV.
Omega CLUBS EHDV, and whips him hard into barriers! EHDV falls in a heap, but Omega goes looking under the ring. Omega brings out a TABLE! Fans fire up for that, and Omega stands that table up near the ring. The ref reprimands, this isn’t a Tables match or anything like that. But fans chant, “WE WANT TABLES!” as Dynamite goes picture in picture.
Omega drags EHDV up, puts him in the ring, and Omega storms up to scoop and BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Omega clamps on with an armlock and chinbar, but he also fishhooks EHDV’s face! The ref reprimands, Omega lets off, but then pulls on EHDV’s hair! The ref counts but Omega lets off at 4. Omega looms over EHDV, stomps him, stomps him more, then springboard stomps! Omega drags EHDV around to KNEE him in the side! And again! Cover, TWO! EHDV hangs tough but Omega just snarls. Omega drags EHDV up to CHOP him back down! Omega drags EHDV up again to CLUB him back down!
Omega drags EHDV up at the ropes, ROCKS him with a right hand, then ROCKS him again! And again! And again! The ref reprimands and counts, Omega lets off, but then Omega CHOKES EHDV with his foot! Dynamite returns, the fans boo and the ref counts, but Omega lets off at 4 again. Omega ROCKS EHDV again, JABS him, then whips him to ropes. EHDV ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl RANA! Omega goes to the apron, fans fire up as EHDV pursues! EHDV ROCKS Omega, but Omega tomahawk chops back! EHDV CHOPS, but Omega CHOPS! EHDV CHOPS back, so Omega BOOTS him! Omega runs in, goes up, and he MONKEY FLIPS EHDV on the apron!
EHDV falls to the floor while fans lose minds over how tight that one was. Omega drags EHDV up to the apron, and he grins as he looks at the table he set up. Omega drags EHDV up, the ref reprimands but Omega full nelsons! EHDV slips free to GAMANGIRI again! EHDV goes up top, balances on the post, and FLYING DRAGONRANAS!! Fans are thunderous as Omega hits the floor! Omega flounders into the ring, EHDV shoves him further in. Fans say “This is Awesome!” as both men go to corners. EHDV runs corner to corner to clothesline! EHDV hoists Omega up top, and GAMANGIRIS yet again!
EHDV climbs up after Omega, fans fire up again as they start to brawl! Omega HEADBUTTS, reels EHDV in, and SUPER POWER- STEINER!!! EHDV reverses just in time, Omega clutches his head! EHDV goes to the ropes, stands from the middle and PHOENIX SPLASHES in!!! Cover, TWO?!?! Omega survives by nanoseconds!! Independence is electric as both men rise up! They hope these two “FIGHT FOREVER!” but it has to end somehow! EHDV throws a forearm, a SOBAT, and then he runs to springboard, into a POWERBOMB!! And then another POWERBOMB! Roll through and V-TRIGGER!! Cover, TWO!!!
Omega is furious as EHDV survives! Omega slashes his throat, drags EHDV up, and he full nelsons for a SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX! Omega snarls, he puts EHDV on the ropes and takes aim. BANG and V-TRIGGER!! But that’s not the end of it! Omega drags EHDV up, deadweight as he is, and Electric Chair Lifts! But EHDV throws down fists! EHDV hops down, UPPERCUTS, then goes up and up to FLYING POISON-RANA!!! Omega tumbles to the apron, and EHDV crawls over to push him onto the table! EHDV builds speed while fans fire up, and he goes up to ESCALARA 630 SENTON through the table!!!!
Independence is volcanic for “A E DUB! A E DUB!” while Callis is freaking out! Both men are down in the wreckage as the ring count starts. EHDV crawls away at 3 of 10, Omega finally stirs at 4. Both men drag themselves up at 6, stand at “OCHO!” And both men slide in at 9! EHDV covers, TWO!!! Omega is still in this and EHDV is beside himself! Fans rally up, both men rise again, and EHDV throws a haymaker! Omega gives it back, they go back and forth, faster and faster! They go forearm for forearm, stand up, and keep throwing shots! EHDV gets the edge, SOBATS, runs, into a V-TRIGGER!!
Omega whips, EHDV rolls up and SUNSET FLIP BOMBS! TWO?!?!? Omega narrowly escapes again and even HE is shocked! But EHDV hurries to a corner and climbs up top! Omega flounders in the drop zone, EHDV 630 SENTONS but FLOPS as Omega moves!! EHDV flounders up, into a V-TRIGGER!!! Omega drags EHDV up, Electric Chair Lifts, ONE WINGED ANGEL!!!! Cover, OMEGA WINS!
Winner: Kenny Omega, by pinfall
This was a dream match the moment it was made, but this became an all-time classic by the end! Tony Schiavone joins Callis and Omega in the ring to say this was an incredible match. Omega is back in singles competition, and that was one for the ages! Omega thanks Schiavone for that. The more time goes by, the more he wonders if he can still do this kind of stuff for the fans. Wait, wait! THE BCC JUMPS OMEGA!! Moxley, Claudio & Yuta all mug Omega, and fans boo while Callis can only shout at the ref to stop this! The BCC stand Omega up so they can throw body shots and haymakers!
Fans continue to boo, but wait! Sirens? An ambulance has returned? For who? Wait, HANGMAN is driving it!! The Cowboy has a 2×4, with nails in it! Fans are going nuts for “COWBOY SH*T!” while the BCC stomp away on Omega. But here comes Hangman, wood in hand! The BCC decide to bail! Callis checks on Omega but the damage has been done. Hangman wants Moxley to get his ass back in here, but he stays back. Callis tries to calm Hangman down, but he almost gets 2×4 to the face! Callis keeps pulling at Hangman’s arm to hold him back, but Hangman shakes free and Callis falls right down! Omega comes to, and misunderstands why Callis is down!
Callis blames Hangman but Hangman says he didn’t do anything to Don! Omega and Hangman argue, Callis cowers behind Omega, and Omega takes Callis’ side. Fans boo, but is this just Callis keeping Omega all to himself?
A great episode of Dynamite, but it already feels like they’re gonna keep things going until Double or Nothing, no big thing for April. We got a great promo out of the Four Young Pillars, and MJF is making the other three run the #1 contender race like he did Bryan Danielson from now until, I dunno, probably May 3rd so that May can focus on building MJF VS his challenger. Hard to say who it’ll be, but Darby’s off to a good start with that great Six Man Tag. Darby, Sting and Cassidy made an eclectic but great combination, especially with Sting borrowing some Freshly Squeezed tactics. And Cassidy’s International Championship card is open to just about anyone at this point.
Really good tag title match, but I should’ve figured shenanigans would help The Gunns retain. The Kingdom and Top Flight are solidly ROH Tag title contenders with #ReachForTheSky needing teams. Plus, The Gunns’ real story is with FTR, who came back to have a really good promo with them. Gunns VS FTR, Titles VS AEW contracts could honestly go either way. There’s a lot of talk out there of FTR going back to WWE since it’s under HHH right now, so this move could be how FTR exits AEW, but this could also be what guarantees FTR staying. Either way, this is going to be some really big stuff for the titles.
Good promo from Jade and her group, and you do have to appreciate Sterling’s gimmick of bringing about frivolous lawsuits on behalf of people to poke fun at wrestling tropes. The security guards finally got justice, even though they also got crushed by Wardlow, and now finishers that are exactly the same but with different names are being questioned. Pretty sure Leila loses the match and Taya tears up that document, though. Then it’ll be about who hits the chicken wing facebuster first to win that title. Jade has done an amazing job being an undefeated inaugural TBS Champion, but now is the time to move on to someone else so Jade can move on to the top title.
Great segment out of Hook, Stokely and The Firm. Great show from Stokely with trying to weasel out of this, then trying to run away from this, but of course he gets thrown around. Awesome use of spare guard railing, though. I figured Hook VS Ethan was going to be how this wraps up, can’t wait to see how that goes. And I appreciate Starks getting a little meta on the bad pacing of feuds. Starks VS Juice for Rampage, if it happens, will be great stuff, and maybe shenanigans helps Juice win to keep this going. Though, I feel like Starks and Juice could each be doing something better than spinning their wheels with each other. Give me Starks VS Hobbs and Orange VS Juice for those respective titles.
Speaking of which, only the second QTV segment and I’m just done with it. But they did point out the weird logic of Penta not being out there with Fenix last week. Penta VS Hobbs will probably go the same as Fenix VS Hobbs did, and Wardlow will come back for revenge. Also, another wrestling trope that needs poking at: Solo confessed to illegal activities but he won’t get investigated or arrested because it’s wrestling. If Sterling were a Face lawyer, he’d be right on Solo’s ass. But maybe Wardlow beats the crap out of Solo as his punishment, then he gets his shot at Hobbs at Double or Nothing to put this story to rest.
Great promo from Cole and Garcia, and I appreciate they had Garcia have that slip of the tongue. Garcia is of course enjoying the fun side of being a sports entertainer, showing off his personality and just doing whatever shenanigans he wants, but he also clearly enjoys the pro-wrestling stuff of just fighting. Garcia VS Cole is going to be awesome stuff, but Garcia and the JAS also have their story with the House of Black so who knows how the finish goes. Great match out of Storm VS Skye, and Skye looked great even in defeat. Another inconsistency in wrestling logic: Riho & Willow should’ve been ringside to start because they know The Outcasts will be up to no good. But I suppose that does give Riho & Willow their moment of heroism in running the Outcasts off.
I bring up that inconsistency in logic because that match was after Moxley VS Grayson, where both men had their allies ringside. The men can think to bring their boys but the women’s division can’t think to bring their friends along, when we’ve also always seen Britt have Rebel and/or Hayter and vice-versa? Anyway, great stuff out of Moxley VS Grayson, and Grayson also looked awesome even in defeat. The BCC apparently went after everyone Hangman considers a friend, as the Bucks were taken out off-camera by them, and then the BCC jump Grayson.
And then, for being a non-title TV main event, Omega VS El Hijo del Vikingo went above and beyond anything I would’ve expected. There were some scary moments, like that Super Steiner counter to the powerbomb. But then again, it wouldn’t feel like an AAA match if there wasn’t some risk like that. BCC jumping Omega after he wins was a good way to keep the Elite reunion story going, but now there’s the new wrinkle of Don Callis wanting Omega to stay a singles star. To be fair, this is very much like the story of Callis, Omega and The Elite when AEW first got started. Callis wants Omega to return to that Omega, and he throws Hangman under the bus.
Another pro-wrestling logic thing is that no one watches the show back when it’s done, unless it helps the story. And I would hope Omega does that here to see what really happened as opposed to just trusting Callis and distrusting Omega. Or if not Omega, the Bucks can. The Bucks will have seen it on TV at the hospital (kayfabe) and The Bucks will tell Omega that Hangman didn’t hit Callis. Callis is also trying to recruit Konosuke, so it’d be great if Callis only comes out of this with one client. If Omega realizes not to trust Callis over The Elite, then Callis and Konosuke can stick together. If Omega still keeps Callis around, Konosuke can reject Callis to stay his own man.
My Score: 8.9/10
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Mitchell’s WWE NXT Results & Report! (3/21/23)
Time for a grudge match!
Will NXT be UNBESIEGBAR?
While Stand & Deliver is on the horizon, Ilja Dragunov and JD McDonagh look to settle their NXT rivalry! Will the Czar trump the Irish Ace once and for all?
- NXT Women’s Championship Qualifier: Tiffany Stratton VS Indi Hartwell; Tiffany wins and advances to the title match at Stand & Deliver.
- Ilja Dragunov VS JD McDonagh; Double Disqualification Draw.
- NXT Women’s Championship Qualifier: Lyra Valkyria VS Ivy Nile; Lyra wins and advances to the title match at Stand & Deliver.
- The Great Debate: Chase U VS The Schism; Chase U wins.
- Bron Breakker & Carmelo Hayes w/ Trick Williams VS Pretty Deadly; Bron & Melo win.
PLAY BY PLAY
Pretty Deadly heads to the ring.
Kit Wilson & Elton Prince, the hosts of Stand & Deliver, are apparently just fine after getting thrown through a table last week. Elton has the mic to say, “Attention, attention. Quiet please. It is us, your hosts of Stand…” “And Deliver!” #YESBOY! And as their first official act as the hosts of Stand… and Deliver, they are officially wiping the footage of last week’s closing segment from the archives! You will no longer be able to view those “neckbearded mouth-breathing” Gallus boys cheat to win!
Nor will you see Bron Breakker & Carmelo Hayes jump them from behind to put them through a table! Elton already pretends to not know what happened. The gumption of those two! If not for the fact that these two are the hosts of Stand… and Deliver, those two wouldn’t even make it to Lala Land. Last week is history, today is a mystery. But let’s not get too far off the point. Let’s talk outfits for Stand… and Deliver! Now, hold on, talking about outfits, did you see those horrid ensembles both Melo and Bron were wearing last week? Main event talent, sure. But main event style? But wait, here come Trick Melo Gang!
Trick asks if his mic is working. It is. Good. Because he told the two bobbleheads to be quiet when grown-ups are talking. But Pretty Deadly interrupted so they had to get some “table service.” Melo says not to get it twisted. He was so dripped out, he left puddles! Talk about it. While Melo prepares for his biggest match ever, Pretty Deadly is standing here with his name in their mouths? In all fairness, Mr. Melo, Kit said it. Don’t try and be cute. HEY! They were born cute! They don’t have to try. HEY! Remember what Trick said about talking during grown folks business! We’re talking about the FUTURE NXT Champion! We don’t need that bad juju.
Trick figures Pretty Deadly shouldn’t talk the talk, but walk the walk. Um, hold on, there might be a break down in communication. They only speak the king’s English. But if they want to have a match, if Melo wants to jeopardize the main event of Stand…! And Deliver, then they ACCEPT! Good! Because tonight, the main event, Pretty Deadly VS the man, the myth and the legend, Carmelo Hayes, and his partner… BRON BREAKKER! Trick even tricks Melo there! But then Pretty Deadly attacks! They throw Trick out then mug Melo! But here comes BRON! Bron CLOBBERS Kit, DECKS Elton, and then TOSSES Kit! Elton runs in, he also gets TOSSED!
Bron trophy lifts Kit, and THRWOS him out onto Elton! Pretty Deadly has a pretty nasty landing, and the fans fire up! Bron offers Melo a hand, Melo takes it, and the two stand. Bron says nothing is gonna happen to Melo between now and Stand & Deliver. Melo scowls and takes his leave, but will the champion and challenger be able to stay civil on the Road to WrestleMania Weekend?
Trick and Melo regroup backstage.
Melo asks Trick what the heck, and Trick says he doesn’t know. That was all Trick Melo Gang, they didn’t need Bron. Bron wants Melo at his best, and he’ll get just that. And that means NEW NXT Champion, but he’s teaming with Bron now? Trick always has Melo’s back, right? Yeah, but Melo doesn’t wanna do that “Can they coexist?” crap! But Trick has Melo’s back. Melo needs to know Bron’s speed, flow and body control. Now he’ll have a front row seat. He’ll have the blueprint. Trick himself takes care of the conversation: “Thanks, Trick.” “You’re welcome, Melo.” And Pretty Deadly is easy money. Trick will make sure of that.
And at Stand & Deliver, the most important thing is still the most important thing. That’s all it is, and that’s all it’s gonna be.
NXT Women’s Championship Qualifier: Tiffany Stratton VS Indi Hartwell!
Daddy’s Little Rich Girl claimed she was going to Stand & Deliver even before Roxanne Perez retained the title against Meiko Satomura. But now with the title quite literally up in the air, will she take a spot in the ladder match? Or will #IndiWrestling finally have her moment in Hollywood?
The bell rings and fans rally behind Indi. Indi and Tiffany tie up, Indi headlocks, but Tiffany powers out. Indi runs Tiff over, covers, ONE! Indi wrenches an arm, RAMS shoulders, then wrenches again. Indi RAMS Tiff again, then YANKS the arm. Indi whips Tiff to a corner, runs in, but into a BOOT! Tiff runs in to CLOBBER Indi! Cover, TWO! Tiffany is annoyed but she drags Indi up. Indi wrenches out, and short arm LARIATS right back! And then short arm LARIATS again! Tiff dodges the next one, kicks low and snap suplexes! Cover, TWO! Fans rally, Tiff stomps Indi and talks trash, but Indi hits back!
Tiffany CLUBS Indi, drags her up and whips her to a corner hard! Indi bounces off buckles and Tiffany taunts her more. Indi blocks the whip, blocks it again, and ROCKS Tiffany with forearms! Tiffany kicks low, whips Indi hard into another corner, then runs to handspring and back elbow! Tiffany runs, but Indi avoids the stomps! Roll-up, TWO! Indi stomps Tiffany, puts her through ropes, and then uppercuts, but misses! Tiff trips Indi, but Indi kicks her away. Indi goes to the apron but Tiff TRIPS her! Indi hits the apron, Tiff says this is HER world and we’re all just living in it. Fans boo as NXT goes to break.
NXT returns and Tiffany has Indi in a chinlock. Indi endures, fights up, and throws body shots. Tiffany comes back, but into a JAWBREAKER! Indi runs in but Tiff sends her to ropes! Tiff runs to HIP ATTACK! Cover, TWO! Indi is still in this and Tiffany grows annoyed. Tiffany scoops but Indi slips off and waistlocks. Tiff runs to RAM Indi into buckles, then she DOUBLE STOMPS Indi down! Cover, TWO! Indi survives and fans rally up again. Tiffany drags Indi up, whips her to the corner, but Indi reverses. Tiffany goes up and over and handsprings, then comes back, but into Indi’s BIG back suplex!
Both women are down and fans rally back up. Indi and Tiffany crawl after each other, and Indi throws a forearm! Tiffany throws it back, but Indi throws another! They brawl as they stand up, Indi ROCKS and kicks and CLUBS and DECKS Tiffany! Fans fire up and Indi puts Tiffany through ropes to UPPERCUT and BOOT! Tiffany falls, Indi covers, TWO! Tiffany hangs tough but Indi runs in. Tiff dodges the boot to POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Indi is still in this and Tiffany pounds the mat in frustration. Fans boo as she goes to the apron, and Tiffany springboards. Indi avoids the swanton! SPINEBUSTER! Cover, TWO!!
Indi is surprised Tiffany survives, but she hurries to bring Tiffany up. Tiffany RAMS Indi into the corner, but Indi ELBOWS her back. Indi goes up but Tiffany YANKS her down! Fireman’s carry, and ROLLING SENTON! BEST MOONSAULT WHATEVER! Cover, Tiffany wins!
Winner: Tiffany Stratton, by pinfall (advances to Stand & Deliver)
Love her or hate her, the spoiled rich girl backed up her big talk. She is now the third woman to compete in the ladder match, but just how many more participants is HBK going to add?
Gallus is at the bar again.
They have more pints, they’re playing more pool, and they’re happy to be past Pretty Deadly. It is still Gallus Boys On Top! Mark Coffey breaks, but in walk the Creed Brothers. Gallus, funny seeing you guys here. Uh, everyone knows where to find them, Brutus. They’re not hard to find. They fancy a game? Sure, Gallus can break. Alright. Two more pints for Gallus, and uh, two glasses of milk for the Creeds. Milk? C’mon! Brutus will have what they’re having, but Julius is already too wild sober. They play a game, and once again, Gallus dominates the green felt. Eight ball, corner pocket for the win.
Great game, lads. Well, 8 Ball was never their game. Now darts? BULL’S EYE. Well alright, Gallus will throw. And just as Julius said, he and Brutus dominate. They want another round? Yeah, best two outta three. Except that round goes to the Creeds, too. Well, Gallus never took the Creeds for a pair of archers. Hey, they work hard in the dojo, and play hard outside. Well, between pool and darts, that just means they’re tied, 1-1. And they could go all day, but Julius has a better idea for the tiebreaker. Wolfgang and Mark know, too. Stand & Deliver, for the tag titles. No Pretty Deadly, no Indus Sher, the Creeds want the belts back.
Well, Gallus will gladly see them in LA, but the titles are staying with them. See you then. They all shake on it, then head out. Only for Tony D’Angelo & Channing Lorenzo to be waiting. Where’s everyone going? Next round’s on The Don. Because they have business to discuss. Stand & Deliver, that is. Really? Well, this is gonna be a long night. Everyone goes back inside the bar, will Tony and the Underboss get themselves a part in the Hollywood title picture?
Lyra Valkyria speaks.
As she runs up the stairs and through the halls of an abandoned building, she says, “Stand & Deliver, Los Angeles, get ready to soar.” But will she overcome her first obstacle here tonight?
Backstage interview with Gigi Dolin.
McKenzie Mitchell is with someone who has already qualified for the NXT Women’s Championship Ladder Match, and asks Gigi her feelings on the field so far. Gigi say sit is too early to judge. As sad as it is, if Roxie didn’t get hurt, this match wouldn’t be happening. Also, in regards to Jacy Jayne and her bad shoulder, sorry not sorry. Jacy tried to make Gigi’s life a living hell, so she can stay home and watch as Gigi climbs the ladder. The last time Gigi was in a ladder match, she won it. And she has been put through the wringer since. But mentally, no one has any idea. Gigi will do anything to-
Tiffany walks in to interrupt. She “loves” the confidence and all, but did you see her just win and get in that match? So Gigi and every other woman’s chances just went from “possible” to “absolutely screwed.” That title is Tiffany’s. Oh, another Tiffany Epiphany! Tiffany’s gonna win by climbing that ladder all the way to the tippy top! And she’ll love it. Tootles. Gigi makes a face, will Gigi slap that smug attitude right out of Tiffany come Stand & Deliver?
Wes Lee is in the ring.
“OOOH YO! Things have been absolutely crazy around here, right? And y’all have been enjoying these open challenges, correct?” Fans cheer and Wes says that’s good, because he has, too. But he constantly gets asked, “Why? Why are you doing it this way? Why continue to roll the dice? Eventually, your number’s gonna get called.” To Wes, he doesn’t wanna be a hypocrite. When he won this title at Halloween Havoc, it was his first shot at it. And he just knew he had to give it everything he had, because if he came up short, he doubted he’d ever get another shot. And now, as champion, he vows to give anyone the opportunity that was in that same position he was in.
Now, secondly, he knows he’s looking deep within himself, but he has a chip on his shoulder. He needs to prove not just to the world, but to himself, that he can and will compete against the best athletes in the world! That he deserves to carry the title! That he deserves to be our NXT North American Champion! Fans fire up for that, but Wes says many have seen a bit of this fire from that “creeper” vid of him and HBK. And HBK made it clear Wes had four spots for four superstars to compete against him at Stand & Deliver. But wait, here comes DRAGON LEE! Speaking of one of the best from around the world…!
Dragon Lee joins Wes Lee in the ring and has the mic. “Wow, wow, wow. Thank you, all. Nice to meet you, Wes.” Wes says it’s nice to meet him. Dragon says that he came to NXT for the same reason as Wes. But to Dragon, Wes IS the best. But y’know what? Dragon LOVES the chaos! And at Stand & Deliver in LA, Dragon wants to part of that challenge against Wes. Wes says this is what he loves. Wes has followed Dragon’s career from Mexico to Japan, and has wondered what’d it be like if the two of them tangled. And when Dragon signed with NXT, Wes thought it’d be like six to eight months before they got to.
But everyone knows Wes is impatient! So let’s make it official! Dragon gets the first spot! See you in LA! But wait, here comes the Irish Ace! JD McDonagh is going to face Dragunov later tonight, but he says, “Look what it is! Wes Lee, Dragon Lee, the Lees putting each other over. It’s funny you two are running your mouths about the best in the world, I’m backstage warming up. So Dragon, you’re new here, I’ll give you a pass this week. But I suggest you grab a chair, sit your ass front row, and watch a grandmaster at work when I dismantle Ilja Dragunov.” Fans boo but JD tells Wes, “What’s your excuse?”
Wes’ excuse? What’s gonna be JD’s excuse after Ilja rips him apart? Fans fire up for that! JD steps into the ring, and he says Wes should count himself lucky that JD hasn’t had his eyes on that title. Because if he had, not only would Wes not be standing here with it, he wouldn’t be standing at all. But wait! Here comes the Czar! JD is here, so Dragunov isn’t gonna wait! Time for the grudge match! Will either man be left standing after this one?
NXT Anonymous has another video.
Whoever they are, they watch as Indi storms backstage and takes her frustrations out on a trash can. Then she gets mad at Zoey for smirking. Indi asks, “What the hell are you looking at?” Zoey says, “Definitely not the next NXT Women’s Champion.” Zoey heads off, is this the end of the road for #IndiWrestling in NXT?
Kiana James watches in the locker room.
She says that was a pretty good line from Zoey. Fallon Henley then walks in and Kiana mocks Indi for not making it to Stand & Deliver. But they are, tag champ! Isla Dawn & Alba Fyre don’t stand a chance- Enough, Kiana. She knows what’s going on here. Fallon, don’t worry, Kiana isn’t worried about the singles title. No, not that! Sebastian! Kiana’s eyes go wide, but then she denies even recognizing that name. Save it, Kiana. Fallon was in your office. What?! How’d she even get past security!? Fallon says that doesn’t matter, she saw the flowers and the card. Card? What? PROOF! Kiana freaks out again!
How can Kiana even sleep at night, cheating on Jensen!? Fallon knew better than to trust Kiana! Now she’s gonna go tell Jensen. Oh, yes, go run to Brooks and tell him. That’ll screw up EVERYTHING before the biggest match in their careers! But Jensen is family! Kiana may not care about him, but Fallon does! Fallon storms off, what can Kiana do to stop the truth from getting out?
Ilja Dragunov VS JD McDonagh!
NXT returns and the bell rings. These two fire off forearms and fists right away! Dragon watches ringside just like JD wanted as Dragunov ROCKS him! JD rebounds to ROCK Dragunov, but Dragunov rebounds to ROCK JD! They keep going back and forth, then Dragunov BOOTS JD! JD roars as he stays up, but Dragunov ENZIGURIS him down! Now Dragunov roars and fans fire up! Dragunov KNEES JD in the side again and again, then drags him up to CLUB him on the back! Fans rally up for that, “ONE MORE TIME! ONE MORE TIME!” and Dragunov CLUBS JD again! Dragunov then whips JD to a corner, runs in, but JD slips out!
Dragunov knees the buckles, and JD trips him to slingshot TORNILLO SPLASH! Dragon is impressed, but fans boo as JD throws down forearms. Dragunov gets away to a corner, but JD storms up to COHP! JD digs his knee into Dragunov, the ref counts, and JD lets off at 4. Fans boo but JD brings Dragunov up to short arm LARIAT! Dragunov flounders, JD covers, TWO! JD drags Dragunov up to snap suplex! Cover, TWO! Dragunov gets away to ropes but JD stomps him. JD drags Dragunov up to wrench, but Dragunov breaks free and trips JD! JD avoids the falling forearm, and the backhand! Dragunov avoids the headbutts!
The forearm start flying again, and both men DECK each other! Fans are thunderous for “NXT! NXT!” and Dragon nods his respect. JD and Dragunov go forehead to forehead, and JD SLAPS! Dragunov SLAPS! It is a SLAP fight! Fans are thunderous again as the SLAPS keep going! JD swings, misses, GERMAN SUPLEX! Dragunov drags JD back up, but JD throws elbows. Dragunov still GERMAN SUPLEXES! Fans want that ‘ONE MORE TIME!” so Dragunov drags JD back up. JD fights the waistlock, pries it free to switch and shove, but Dragunov hits the CONSTANTINE SPECIAL! Both men are down and the fans are thunderous again!
Dragunov drags JD to a cover, TWO! “This is Awesome!” as Dragunov stands back up. Dragunov runs in to KNEE JD in the corner, then puts him down. Dragunov goes up, KNEE DROP! Dragunov roars and goes back up top! But JD stands to ROCK Dragunov! And CHOP! JD climbs up, but Dragunov fights back with body shots! Dragunov HEADBUTTS JD away, then adjusts. JD comes back to grab hair! JD THROWS Dragunov off the top! Fans boo and JD brings Dragunov up to throw him into ropes! Dragunov flops out of the ring and fans boo more while NXT goes picture in picture.
JD grins as he watches Dragunov down on the floor. Dragunov sputters and stirs but JD goes out after him. JD drags Dragunov up for an APRON BACK SUPLEX! Dragunov flounders away, JD hurries in, and he drops an AX HANDLE! Cover, TWO! JD kicks at Dragunov, but Dragunov eggs him on. JD stands Dragunov to ROCK him! Dragunov CHOPS! And CHOPS! And CHOPS! But then his arm gives up! JD hits a BIG DDT!! Dragunov tumbles over his own head and neck! The ref checks him, he’s somehow okay to continue but he’s shaking. JD stands Dragunov up to whip him hard into the corner!
Dragunov falls to the mat, JD drags him to a cover, TWO! JD grows frustrated with Dragunov, and he clamps on a facelock. JD grinds Dragunov down, Dragunov fights up, and Dragunov pries free to wrench the arm. JD KNEES Dragunov low! Dragunov falls and clutches his gut, but JD stalks him to ropes. JD wrenches an arm, to hit an atomic BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Dragunov is still in this but JD keeps his focus. JD stomps Dragunov around, digs his boot in, and then gets the arm. JD steps through for a standing leg hook nelson! Dragunov endures as JD puts on more pressure, and NXT returns to single picture.
Fans rally, Dragunov bridges up against the hold, but JD just pushes him back down. JD straightens out the arm like an armbar, but Dragunov still fights. Dragunov has turned this into a STRETCH MUFFLER! Now JD endures and flails for the ROPEBREAK! Dragunov lets go at 4 and fans rally up. JD PENALTY KICKS Dragunov in the back! JD drags Dragunov up for Kawada Kicks! And then a SLAP! But Dragunov kips up, only for JD to duck the Pele! JD fires off more Kawada Kicks, but Dragunov HEADBUTTS! JD HEADBUTTS, but Dragunov kips up to PELE!! Fans are thunderous as both men are down again!
JD and Dragunov slowly rise, and fans hope they “FIGHT FOREVER!” This has to end somehow, and Dragunov rains down HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! Dragunov puts JD in a corner to CHOP him! And then stalks him to another corner, to CHOP him! Dragunov shoves JD to a corner, JD ducks the chop to ELBOW back! But Dragunov stands up to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! JD pie faces Dragunov, but that just pisses Dragunov off! MACHINE GUN CHOPS!! Dragunov stops but he brings JD in to waistlock and SIDE SLAM! Cover, TWO!! JD survives but Dragunov holds on!
“This is Awesome!” as Dragunov drags JD back up. JD fights to ropes, that HOTSHOTS Dragunov, and JD brings Dragunov in! POWERBOMB! High stack, TWO!! But JD holds on with a waistlock of his own. JD drags Dragunov up to GERMAN SUPLEX! JD still holds on, they stand again, for another GERMAN SUPLEX! JD lets go, and Dragunov just rises up! Dragunov swings, into another GERMAN SUPLEX! But Dragunov is up to ROUNDHOUSE JD down!! Fans give a standing ovation as both men fall! Dragunov staggers his way to a corner, and he shouts, “UN! BE! SIEG! BAR!!” TORPEDO- NO!! Takedown into body scissors!
Fans shout “NO! NO! NO!” but Dragunov fights the Irish Twister to rain down fists! JD kicks Dragunov away but Dragunov comes back, LEAPING FOREARM!!! Fans cheer “This is Wrestling!” as both men bail out. They SLAP and SLAP and SLAP! They both grab hair, and they tumble into Dragon Lee!! Dragon is pissed, but JD JABS him for the hell of it! Only for Dragunov to swing! JD dodges, the BACKHAND hits Dragon!! Dragon is FURIOUS, he fires hands on them both!!
Fans go nuts as we get a brawl between all three men! But then WES LEE FLIES IN!! The Cardiac Kid helps Dragon fight against Dragunov and JD! Refs rush in to stop this brawl, but fans want to “LET THEM FIGHT!” Will the only way to settle any of this be at Stand & Deliver?
Trick Melo Gang finds Bron Breakker backstage.
Melo tells Bron that he and Trick didn’t need Bron to handle Pretty Deadly, or to be in the tag match with Pretty Deadly. This isn’t that “Can they coexist?” crap! Bron doesn’t want that, either! The Melo that Bron wants to face at Stand & Deliver is the best Melo. They said it last week that they have an opportunity to make something special happen at Stand & Deliver. So Bron isn’t gonna let two clowns, i.e. Pretty Deadly… Though, Trick Melo Gang, too… Screw it up. What’s Bron mean by that? Well, Trick is always up to something. Trick says he’s up to nothing. He just wanted Bron to share the ring with the future NXT Champion.
Oh, is that so? Melo has Bron leave Trick alone. Bron wants the best possible Stand & Deliver, and so does Melo. Then let’s finish this. Good. Big tag match tonight. Nice doing business with you. Trick Melo Gang leaves, but will they be leaving the arena in one piece?
Backstage interview with Wes Lee.
McKenzie can tell Wes is riled up after that brawl. It seems chaos follows him everywhere. Wes admits, he threw himself to the fire on this one. But Ilja and JD will never be done with each other. But the last two weeks, JD has gotten in Wes’s face and Wes is sick and tired of it! So JD gets the second spot. And Ilja is Europe’s finest. The only way to put that to the test: he gets the third stop! So that leaves one spot left. Who will it be? Axiom walks in and says if there’s room for one more…
Wes knows Axiom wants this and he has been close so many times. But there are still so many others to consider. And Wes wants to give everyone a fair shot, sot he only way to do that, “the chaos continues. We’re about to have ourselves a battle royal, y’all! And the winner gets the fourth and final spot.” axiom says that’s fine. He just wanted a chance, and now he has it. Will the Undeniable Truth be undeniable in that chaotic Battle Royal next week?
Johnny Gargano is here!
Fans fire up for the Rebel Heart, as- Wait. That’s not Johnny Wrestling! That’s JAVIER BERNAL!! Big Body Javi just trolled everyone! “When that music hit, you all thought Johnny Gargano was coming out. But you were wrong! Hah! Just like I thought I was going to Stand & Deliver, the biggest event of the year. But I was wrong. And you know who’s to blame for that? JOHNNY GARGANO!” Johnny took Javi’s spot! Who the hell does Johnny think he is? He’s been gone for 6, 8, 10, 12 months! Has he not been watching NXT while he was away? Javi s the heart and soul of NXT! He has been busting his ass for seven YEARS! Well, no, months.
But what does Johnny have that Javi doesn’t? Johnny Wrestling? No, Big Body Javi is better! Javi would take himself over Gargano every day of the week! How many Christmas albums does Gargano have? NONE! And between the two of them, they’re Triple Crown Champion! *All Johnny. But HBK, Javi says you chose the wrong guy! Wait, here comes the REAL Johnny Wrestling! Fans fire up as Gargano goes right to the ring and he CLOBBERS Javi! Fans fire up more as Gargano TOSSES Javi out! Then RAMS him into barriers! And then RAMS him into steel steps! And then TOSSES him over the barriers!
Fans cheer on Johnny and he grabs himself a mic. “Grayson! Grayson! Grayson Waller! I know you’re somewhere around here, I know you’re listening. You wanna make things personal? You wanna raise the stakes? Let’s raise the stakes. In my hand is a contract for a type of match I know very, very, very well. April 1st, Stand & Deliver, Grayson Waller VS Johnny Gargano… in an UNSANCTIONED MATCH!! No rules! Anything goes! No one is liable for what I do to you. Grayson, all you have to do is come down here and sign it.” But Waller is here via tron. Fired up tonight, huh? Seems he feels better than when he was down and out on his own front lawn.
Waller gets it, Gargano is upset. But an Unsanctioned match? Does Gargano wanna embarrass himself on the biggest stage in NXT? That’s too far, even for Gargano. Not far enough! Come and sign this! Waller says if Gargano thinks he’s going down to that ring, he’s crazy. But Waller will let Gargano give that contract to Vic Joseph so Waller can sign it next week. And, it has to be on one condition: Gargano is BANNED from the building next week. If Waller whiffs even a bit of Gargano, he’s not signing and no one gets what they want. Gargano says if that gets Waller to do it, deal! Gargano gives Vic the contract to hold on to.
Gargano sees Javi get back up and in, and SUPERKICKS him down! Johnny Wrestling wants to unleash everything on Waller, but will he come to regret throwing away all the rules?
There is a moonlight ritual going on.
“There is more to us than you think. I appreciate the significance of my heritage, but I must carry the responsibility of progression. I will hold my people up, and lead the way forward.” Eddy Thorpe is ready to level up to NXT, next week!
Backstage interview with Ivy Nile.
McKenzie brings up how Tatum Paxley betrayed her last week, and can only imagine how devastated she must be. Ivy says she was surprised, just like everyone else. It took her a long time to trust someone like she did Tatum. She let her guard down, and got burned. Tatum is a little “out there,” so the rest of Diamond Mine let her do her. But they thought she was part of the team. So for Tatum to say they weren’t a team, that hurts. But tonight isn’t about Tatum. Tonight, Ivy has an opportunity. If she beats Lyra, Ivy goes to Stand & Deliver and possibly becomes NEW NXT Women’s Champion. Not even Tatum can ruin that.
Hank Walker speaks.
“Everyone’s journey is unique, and mine’s been one hell of a ride.” Security guard turned superstar, but he’s been an athlete his whole life, and was even a three-year starting offensive lineman at North Carolina State. But no sport could’ve prepared him for the WWE. There have been ups and downs, he’s made friends, found a mentor in Drew Gulak only to be abandoned by Drew Gulak. Gulak and Charlie Dempsey don’t see it. They say Hank’s not cut out for this, but he’s gonna work his ass off to prove them wrong. All he needs is himself, and all he needs to do is keep evolving. That is what NXT is all about.
Drew Gulak & Charlie Dempsey are watching.
Gulak mockingly calls that promo “cute.” Dempsey says that’s one way of putting it. Walker still lacks the killer instinct. Exactly! A teacher can only the door, but it is up to the student to see it through. That’s why Hank will be nothing more than “another nice guy.” The technicians have a laugh, but will Hank prove them all wrong?
NXT Women’s Championship Qualifier: Lyra Valkyria VS Ivy Nile!
The Morrigan and the Diamond Pitbull are going to fight tooth and nail to take that fourth spot in the ladder match! Will Lyra fly higher than the mountains to get that golden ticket? Or will Ivy move mountains to go to Hollywood?
NXT returns and Lyra makes her entrance. The bell rings and the two circle. They feel things out, tie up, and Lyra wrangles Ivy down then Oklahoma Rolls and turns it into an O’Conner Roll! TWO, and Lyra hurries up to go after a leg. Ivy blocks, facelocks, rolls and steps over to flip Lyra over! Cover, ONE! Ivy keeps on the arm but Lyra rolls free. Ivy TACKLES Lyra, drags her back, but Lyra rolls to her feet. Lyra trips Ivy, has a toehold, but Ivy pries her down to an ARMBAR! Lyra clasps hands, Ivy stomps her! They get up, Lyra headbutts low! And KICKS! Ivy grits her teeth but Lyra tells her she’s not gonna stand in her way. Ivy just KICKS Lyra back!
Ivy eggs Lyra on, so Lyra KICKS! Ivy KICKS back, but Lyra scowls. DOUBLE ROUNDHOUSES bring both women down! Fans fire up and we see Tatum watching backstage. Ivy gets a leg, Lyra blocks to hook the arms but Ivy fights the backslide! Ivy spins around, gut wrenches Lyra to SLAM! Cover, TWO! Ivy keeps cool, and she kicks, but Lyra ducks to kip up and ENZIGURI! Fans fire up and Lyra roars! SOBAT! Front kick! HEADBUTT! BOOT! Lyra then reels Ivy in, but Ivy blocks the lift! Ivy facelocks, to snap suplex! Fans rally up, Ivy runs in to CALF KICK her to a corner! Then DIAMOND DRAGON!!
Lyra flails, climbs the corner and goes up and over! GERMAN SUPLEX! Fans rally up again, Lyra HEEL KICKS Ivy down! Cover, Lyra wins!!
Winner: Lyra Valkyria, by pinfall (advances to Stand & Deliver)
The Morrigan breaks through Diamond Mine’s female titan, and now she is going to Stand & Deliver! But will she reach the highest point in the NXT Women’s Division by becoming champion?
Fallon Henley looks for Jensen.
But as she looks, Isla Dawn’s laugh echoes through the hall, and there’s a flash of lightning and crack of thunder! And Alba Fyre CLOBBERS her! Fyre & Dawn mug Fallon and mockingly ask where her friend went. But Kiana runs in to fire off on them! The champs fight back against their challengers, refs rush in but Fallon sends Fyre into the wall! Isla talks trash on Kiana, she and Fyre slip away. Kiana and Fallon regroup, and Kiana says that she can’t tell Jensen. Kiana has to be the one. Fallon agrees to that. Will Kiana let Jensen down gently? Will the team be able to stick together against the Wicked Witches of NXT?
NXT Media catches Wes Lee on his way out.
They ask him who he thinks will win next week’s battle royal. Wes says he doesn’t think you can predict something like that. Just sit back, relax, and watch as it unfolds. Just like he plans on doing, and just like he knows all the fans will do. But then Jinder Mahal walks over to say he will see Wes at Stand & Deliver. And then Dijak walks over to say, “Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you.” And then Dabba-Kato walks up with a big smile. There is no one that will stop him in this battle royal. Wes can’t even. But three of the biggest and baddest are throwing their names into the hat, will any of those giants be the winner?
It’s the NXT Great Debate!
Blake Howard welcomes us as this debate’s mediator, as the crowd is clearly divided between Chase U students and Schism loyalists. These two groups argue they have the better teaching method here in NXT. First up, Rip Fowler and Duke Hudson. “How has your group approached the topic of inclusion?” The first turn goes to Rip. Rip says “Togetherness has always been the founding principle of The Schism. Whilst others hide behind their masks, we have removed ours and prospered together. Duke Hudson, Ava presented you with a gift. An opportunity to remove your mask of phony school spirit, and the Schism will welcome you with open arms.”
Duke’s rebuttal: “Um… Yeah. I mean, Ava did give me a mask. I dunno. Our university has passion. It gave me a sense of belonging, right? It’s nice to feel included in things, I guess. That’s what I think about inclusion.” Andre Chase facepalms at the lack of enthusiasm and commitment from Duke. WTF, man? Thea and Ava are next. “How does your group make you feel safe?” Ava says “The world is a harsh and uninviting place. But I rest comfortably in loving arms, knowing that there is safety under The Schism’s tree. Andre Chase University offers a false sense of security made up of cement walls.
“But The Schism raises invisible walls that block out the world’s negativity, and allows our minds and bodies to wander freely beyond.” Thea’s rebuttal: With a motormouth pace, she says “Webster’s Dictionary defines ‘safety’ as the condition of being safe from hurt, injury, or loss. Protection from hurt, injury and loss come from healing! And I’ve learned a lot of methods of healing through the connections I’ve made at Chase University. The Schism, while claiming safety, brainwash you into believing in safety, and that is hazardous to the mind, body and soul. Thank you, good night.” Chase high-fives Thea on the rebound. Where’d that come from? She doesn’t know, she blacked out.
And thirdly, Professor Andre and Joe Gacy. “How would you rate the preparedness of the other members of your group to leave the nest?” Andre is given the first turn, but Gacy interrupts! “Mr. Chase, your students already answered that for you. They are not prepared! A marble-mouthed doubter, and a reprogrammed wind-up toy? They don’t know which way is up! Moderator, tally the scores.” But then TYLER BATE appears! He apologizes for his tardiness, but he steps forward to say his part. Chase allows it, as does the moderator. That means Bate and Jagger Reed have a showdown!
“How would you sum up the experience of your group?” Jagger says, “It’s simple. Four roots. One tree.” The audience even gets involved on that one. Bate’s rebuttal: “I can objectively say that to excel in NXT, it takes more than just physical prowess inside the squared circle. It takes a big strong mind, open to new ideas. To collaborate and learn, with a willingness to listen to what others have to say, just as they would for you. Now, the Chase University experience is one of growth and constant evolution. It’s ignited a career in Thea Hail, rejuvenated Duke Hudson, and fortified Andre Chase himself!
“Now, the growth of Chase University IS the growth of NXT! And that’s something that The Schism has never and will never achieve!” Chase U’s student section cheers that! Chase thanks Bate for that. And now that they’ve beaten The Schism down philosophically, it is time they beat The Schism down physically! A match! The Schism VS Chase U & Bate in a Mixed 8 Tag at Stand & Deliver! And in Hollywood, they will give The Schism an Andre Chase University sized ass kicking!! Gacy says NO! The Dyad beat Chase U as a team, and Gacy beat Chase 1v1. The Schism is far superior physically and philosophically. There’s nothing left to gain here.
Duke says they’ll put up the school. What? Yeah, Duke, what? You heard him. Winner gets control of Chase University. Then they’re on. Chase is unsure, but this could be Duke’s high stakes gambling past coming back to haunt him. Will Chase U come out of Hollywood with nothing?
NXT checks back in with the bar.
Everything’s a bit hazy, but Gallus, the Creeds, The Don and Underboss have made it through the night. Look at the time! This has been great, but Tony & Stacks have a thing to take care of. Nice place they found here. Might need a broom, though. Julius says, “Don’t you guys know a cleaning service?” Tony snatches his hat off Julius’ head, and says yeah, they do. But not the kind you’re thinking of. Brutus says that was fun. Wolfgang slurs and stammers as he says, “Why’s it gotta stop?” Cuz the Creeds got what they came for, and then some. Then let’s bring the fun to Stand & Deliver. Triple Threat Tag! See you boys in LA.
Oh, and don’t forget to tip the bartender. Gallus is in the best shape out of these boys, but will they still be standing tall after Stand & Deliver?
BREAKING NEWS for next week!
There will be still one more spot in the NXT Women’s Championship Ladder match! And in a Last Chance Triple Threat, it will be Sol Ruca VS Ivy Nile VS Indi Hartwell! Who will redeem themselves on the Road to WrestleMania to still have their shot at the title?
Bron Breakker & Carmelo Hayes w/ Trick Williams VS Pretty Deadly!
The NXT Champion and his challenger may not like Trick’s idea of a team-up, but if it means shutting up Kit & Elton, they’ll do it. Will Bron & Melo body slam the hosts of Stand & Deliver once again? Or will this be about “Can the coexist?” in the end after all?
The teams sort out and Elton rushes in! Melo dodges, but then Kit CLOBBERS Melo! Kit covers, ONE!! Kit drops a knee, talks trash, then runs, but Melo drops, hurdles and ducks! DROPKICK! Then arm-drags! Melo has the armlock, fans rally but Kit arm-drags, only for Melo to arm-drag right back! But that just puts them closer to the Pretty Deadly corner! Elton tags in, Kit holds Melo in place, and Elton runs to UPPERCUT Melo! Elton then brings Melo out to UPPERCUT Melo down. Melo bails out, Elton kicks him from the apron, and Pretty Deadly go after Melo together. But Bron storms over to keep them from throwing Melo into steel steps.
Bron says Pretty Deadly isn’t going to ruin Stand & Deliver. Pretty Deadly lets off of Melo, but then Kit CLUBS Melo on the back. Kit puts Melo in the ring, covers, TWO! Kit drags Melo up, wrenches, but Melo wrenches back and snapmares to PENALTY KICK! Melo runs, but Kit FLAPJACKS! Tag to Elton, he sucker punches Bron, then Pretty Deadly coordinate. “Yes, boy~!” Pretty Deadly both run, but Bron gets in so that he and Melo can stare Pretty Deadly down. Pretty Deadly look to each other, then they throw hands! The brawl is on and both Bron and Melo get the edge. Then they decide to work together!
Bron helps Melo with the SPRINGBOARD LARIAT! Melo flies over Kit to CLOBBER Elton! Bron then RANAS Kit out of the ring! Fans fire up with the champion and his challenger, but they bump into each other. Bron offers handshake, Melo shows fist bump, so paper covers rock. No, man! Melo & Bron wait on Pretty Deadly and fans bark it up as NXT goes picture in picture.
Kit & Elton regroup on the other side of the ring, so Melo tags Bron. Bron waits on someone, but Kit distracts and Elton runs in to CLOBBER Bron! Elton CLUBS Bron, wrenches an arm, but Bron wrenches back. Tag to Melo, he goes up and drops AX HANDLES on the arm! Melo CHOPS Elton to a corner, wrenches and brings him back, tag to Bron. Bron goes up and he drops AX HANDLES! Bron wrenches Elton, but Elton throws body shots. Elton headlocks, Bron powers out, things speed up and Bron hurdles, to then catch Elton for a SPINEBUSTER! Bron rolls through to fireman’s carry!
Bron pops Elton up to a suplex! Bron walks around with Elton and even Melo is impressed. Bron then SLAMS Elton, and he dares Kit to do something. Kit talks trash, steps inside, and Bron DECKS him! But Elton CLOBBERS Bron again! Elton CLUBS Bron, whips him to ropes, but Bron ducks ‘n’ dodges, only to run into a FLAPJACK onto ropes! Elton tags Kit, then Elton anchors Bron so Kit can drop the ELBOW! Cover, TWO! Kit runs to KNEE Bron in the side! And then he runs to KNEE Bron again! Bron goes to the apron but Kit drags him back in. Kit wrenches the arm as NXT returns to single picture.
Fans rally as Bron endures, and Bron fights up. Kit CLUBS Bron down, grinds the arm again, then grabs the other arm for a motorcycle stretch. Bron endures, fights up, but Kit knees low. Kit facelocks, Elton goes up the corner, but Melo GAMANGIRIS Elton down! Bron blocks the buckle bump to elbow Kit! Kit tags Elton, Bron dodges Kit, tag to Melo! Melo hurdles Elton to DECK Kit! Melo dodges Elton to springboard LARIAT! Fans fire up, Melo BOOTS Elton! Kit grabs Melo but Melo wrenches an arm to drag Kit over, slingshot suplex onto Elton! Cover, TWO! Fans rally behind Melo as he stalks Elton.
Melo brings Elton up to ROCK him and whip, but Elton reverses. Elton hurdles, Kit reels Melo in for a DDT! Elton hurries to cover, TWO! Elton drags Melo up to UPPERCUT him back down! Elton stalks Melo to ropes, he UPPERCUTS Melo again, then puts him in the corner. Elton stomps away but lets off as the ref counts. Elton poses, storms back up, but Melo kicks low! And kicks again! Kit tags in, he and Elton stomp Melo. Fans rally as Pretty Deadly double whip, and double shoulder! “Yes, boy!” SPLASH LEG DROP COMBO! Cover, TWO! Kit drops a leg of his own, then drags Melo from Bron.
Kit talks trash, stands Melo up, and ROCKS him! Kit runs in to UPPERCUT Melo! And DECK him with a right! Kit YANKS Melo into a BOMB! Cover, TWO! Melo kicks back from below but Kit CLOBBERS him! Trick coaches Melo but Kit clamps on a chinlock. Melo endures, fans rally up, and Melo fights up. Melo throws body shots, but Kit CLOBBERS him! Tag to Elton, and he stomps away on Melo! Fans boo as Elton drops an AX HANDLE! Cover, TWO! Elton drags Melo away from Bron and stays between them. Elton drags Melo up but Melo ROCKS him! Elton shoves Melo but Melo sunset flips on the rebound! TWO, and Elton CLOBBERS Melo! Cover, TWO!!
Trick and Bron coach Melo up and fans rally. Elton drags Melo up, but Melo ROCKS Elton! Elton ROCKS Melo, Melo ROCKS Elton, and then Melo ROCKS Elton again! Elton keeps Melo from Bron, but Melo breaks free, only to miss his enziguri! But Melo BOOTS Elton away! Hot tags to Kit and Bron! Bron rallies on Pretty Deadly! BIG shoulder tackle for Kit! Haymaker for Elton! GERMAN SUPLEX for Kit! GERMAN SUPLEX for Elton! Kit fires hands with Bron, Kit whips, but Bron ducks ‘n’ dodges to CLOBBER Kit! Fans fire up and Bron grins. Bron drags Kit up in a waistlock, to GERMAN SUPLEX!!
The straps come down, fans fire up with Bron, but Bron climbs up the corner. Fans bark it up, and Bron FLYING BULLDOGS! Cover, Elton breaks it! Melo hurries in to ROCK Elton and BOOT him! Elton flops into the ropes, Kit stands, and Bron runs in! Kit sends Bron at Melo!! Melo goes up the corner and Bron pulls up, avoiding the collision! But Elton struggling in the ropes distracts the ref, Melo hits a CODE BREAKER on Kit! Bron SPEARS Kit down!! Fans fire up as Bron tags Melo to give him the last shot. Melo with NOTHING BUT NET!! Cover, Melo & Bron win!
Winners: Bron Breakker & Carmelo Hayes, by pinfall
Melo don’t miss, and Trick finishes taking notes on Bron. Melo fetches the belt, but hands it over to Bron. Will the game plan be ready so that Melo becomes him? Or will nothing break the Big Booty Nephew?
A really good NXT here, and a lot of quick developments for Stand & Deliver. I do appreciate the consistency of tag teams challenging Gallus for the tag titles through bar games. Tony D & Stacks made their intentions known last week, so them confronting Gallus was expected, but The Creeds getting in on this was a surprise. The tag titles becoming a Triple Threat match is cool, but all three teams are essentially Faces. I’m sensing some kind of shenanigans brings one team around to be Heels, and it won’t be the Creeds. I would personally love it if was Gallus with Joe Coffey returning to help win. Gallus can’t truly be on top if they’re down a man.
Good stuff out of the NXT Women’s Championship story. Good match out of Tiffany VS Indi, and I figured Tiffany would win that. Gigi had a good promo to both address Jacy Jayne and the growing field, but also good promo from Tiffany to keep her character at that just insufferable level. Good promo from Ivy, decent one from Lyra, and good match, but not that strong of a match. I’m a bit torn, as this was a great opportunity for Ivy to even have this qualifier match, but honestly, it should’ve been Stevie Turner. Stevie was the one with that “randomizer” that chose to highlight Lyra, why not give us a match of those two? It’s not like Stevie’s actually busy streaming.
Good stuff out of the women’s tag title story, too. Kiana and Fallon were both great in talking about this Sebastian, and then I like the creativity of the ambush. Instead of lights out and teleporting in, or even just running in, Isla & Alba use fake lightning and thunder to disorient Fallon before the attack. Fighting Alba & Isla off was a decent way to bring Kiana and Fallon back onto the same page, and we’re going to get quite the moment next week in the go-home. And good promo from Hank Walker but also good promo from Gulak & Dempsey. Their story will have to wait until after Stand & Deliver, and could be something big for Spring Breakin’ 2023.
Javier swerving us was very clever, I did not think Javi would get in on this story. Good response from Gargano, and going right for Unsanctioned is nuts! No Disqualification, sure. No Holds Barred, sure. Last Man Standing even! But I guess this is all to represent how long Gargano’s stewed on his grudge for Waller, and how this escalated after Waller found the Gargano house. And given how Waller wants Gargano completely banned from the building next week, it’s so obvious Waller is going to threaten Vic physically, maybe even get physical with Vic, and Gargano can’t do anything about it, thereby adding more fuel to the fire.
Great stuff out of the North American Championship story, with a great promo from Wes and from Dragon Lee, and a good promo from JD ahead of his match with Dragunov. That match was awesome, as all the Dragunov VS JD matches have been, but I should’ve seen it coming that they’d end up colliding with Dragon Lee to bring this around into the North American title match. Wes VS Dragon VS JD VS Dragunov is awesome all on its own, but great move to have a battle royal to decide the fifth person in that match. Axiom has a good promo to let us know he’s gonna be in that match, but I also like that Jinder, Dijak and Dabba-Kato each had a couple lines to let Wes know they’re coming. Dijak’s had his shots, he surely won’t win. But Dabba is definitely a possibility.
Really good segment out of The Great Debate, and nice heroic appearance by Tyler Bate to help Chase U pull out the win. And just as I was hoping, we’re getting a Mixed 8 Tag, and this is going to be great stuff. Putting up the school, aka the faction in itself, is big stuff for Chase U, but I feel like the match could still go either way. And good stuff out of Pretty Deadly, Trick Melo Gang and Bron. The promo stuff was good for Pretty Deadly and Trick Melo Gang, and we got a really good match in the main event. But naturally Bron & Melo win because neither of them was going to suffer lost momentum this close to Stand & Deliver. I’m still voting for Melo winning the title and Bron being called up. After all, there’s a WWE Snickers commercial with Bron Breakker and AJ Styles, that feels like a sign.
My Score: 8.8/10
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