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Cheap Shots: Odd Readings From The Odometer

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Cheap Shots are unfiltered, uncensored opinions, and those opinions reflect only the author!

Mad Man avoiding jet wash as I hit the proper cruising altitude above The Motor City, in the shadow of Cobo Hall. Don’t worry, no blades or fire balls showed up last night. Let’s Rock’N’Roll! The initial segments should have clued us in to a very strange night ahead. Kurt Angle opens Monday Night Raw with a quick promo reminding us of The Main Event at WrestleMania. The other three participants in the match were not in the building. We would find out relatively quickly that this number would increase even more than smart marks were thinking. Turns out, Kurt could’ve stayed in the back after five minutes.

I’m curious if anyone else heard The Twilight Zone Theme embedded under the action last night? Once The Olympic Gold Medalist mentioned Brock Lesnar, Bradbury was easily found throughout the show. An utterance of The Beast’s absence when his presence was promised in Motown last week drew an irate Roman Reigns from behind the curtain. Wait, people in the art form lie? Yes Roman; even you lie, and I’ll prove it.

If the next 20 minutes weren’t proof that WWE scripting promos is pointless, I can run a marathon. Sheep were back to being themselves as Roman says Brock is disrespecting both he and they once again. He tells us that he found out from Kurt’s show intro about Lesnar skipping out, as opposed to Vince McMahon letting him know. After all, Vince was in the back. “Anybody else does what Brock’s done in another job: they get fined, suspended, or fired. He gets special treatment” No s*** Sherlock…We knew he could roid up when they brought him back!

“It’s one thing to be disrespected by Brock Lesnar…” whom he called. “Vince’s Boy,” “I will NOT be disrespected by Vince McMahon!” Quick, anybody know the definition of irony? They even hang the one baby face they’re not trying to kill, and nobody tries to stop them? Roman stomps to the curtain a hot mess. Magically, Vince appears in the back. Fourth Wall Alert: Most the time, the old dude calls the show from a production truck. Reigns almost gets physical as the two men go to an office to talk.

Shortly afterward, a walking teleprompter sticks a mic in Roman’s face, and gets nothing as he leaves. Vince follows: “Brock does get special treatment, he’s earned it.” No, you GAVE it to him. Anything else, you talking caricature? “Roman has to know his role…He is temporarily suspended.” Are we allowed to go through our TVs and smack him? STOP IT! This is why fans are pissed! Vinnie, you have shoved this man and this Mania match down our throats for over a year. Break The Fourth Wall already, He’s not suspended, and he is your boy!

On to our regularly scheduled programming: Early recess, first of multiple women’s segments, yay! Absolute Yawn accompanies Sonya Deville. They await Lady Banks and The Human Elmo. Sasha’s Bossed Out, but Bayley left her gimmick at home. She looks like someone stole her dog. Physical match as always with The Female Dragon involved. Bayley made sure Sasha got the win after she pulled Mandy Rose off the apron. She left Sasha alone post-match to get a beat down from Absolute Yawn. Hey Hug Life, if she snaps, it’s gonna take all 3.5 of you to beat The Boss at Mania!

Appropriate that MIZ TV followed Absolute Yawn, as I welcome everyone to the “giving away a PPV match for free” portion of the show. Prior to their one-on-one match, The Move Set Twins did everyone a huge favor by knocking The Miz out of the ring. Hey Mike, can you not make it look so obvious when you’re taking a bump over the top rope? Just curious, I promise you can keep stealing money if it’s too much to ask. Balor and Rollins had a solid match with fluid movement as always. The 8-Pack Irishman won when Rollins waited a beat too long in his suplex combination. Someone actually won a match ala Steamboat at Mania III!

The latest Raw in Seger’s House felt like promo and vignette central. The wow moment of the night? No one breaks The Fourth Wall like Big Match John. Started simple enough. John came out his normal self. Said his new plan to get to Mania was to buy a ticket and go as a fan. He started one of his 50/50 chants and said he was ready to not hear it at Mania. Wait, he stops to ask: “How many people wanna see The Undertaker kick my ass?” “If you were done, you wouldn’t be posting workouts…” Whole promo’s worth a Youtube search

Other than Cena, most non-ring work fell into the WTF category. Elias showed up for a gig but was too battered to play: Lights, Guitar, Stool: “This is all your fault.” Braun cut a bright letter promo gloating about pianos. More on him later. The Bar asked Kurt Angle to be traded to SmackDown Live. More on them later. Do I really have to tell you if Woken Matt Hardy or Bray Wyatt made sense? There will be a Women’s Battle Royal at Mania named for The Fabulous Moolah. Everybody needs to flood social media and protest this to get it changed. There is a reason it’s The Mae Young Classic. Moolah’s treatment of those she trained, including her daughter, was hideous. Given my feelings about ladies in the art form, I am sickened those in Stamford gave her such an honor. Research? Ask any of these gentlemen: @wrestlerweekly, @mikeleotis, @SethHanson1982.

Okay, off my soapbox, and back to recess. Asuka starts an in-ring promo and gets one word in before Little Miss Math Class Goes Full Mean Girl. Bliss says Asuka is smart and made the right choice. The Rising Sun Mystic Says Charlotte is the better champion! Bliss and Mickie James start laughing. They think Nia Jax is coming out. She doesn’t show. Mickie attacks The Japanese Ace. They have a very physical contest. This included Asuka hurting her leg. The Empress is still unbeaten thanks to an Asuka Lock. Alexa leaves ringside to go ask Nia where she was. Angle put her in a squash match, she was prepping. Bliss keeps feeding her backhanded compliments. Despite this, Nia promises to back her up against Asuka next week. Big Girl handles her match. She is still in the ring when a camera and boom mic in their locker room turn on at the wrong time! Alexa proved how much of a B**** she was in five minutes and bolted faster than Mysterio. Miss Nia is pissed, and Little Miss Math Class is DEAD come Mania!

Earlier in the night, The Bar was scheduled for a match versus The Miztourage. The Europeans have been talking trash long enough to infuriate every team on RAW, so every team jumped them in the ring. Kurt Angle thought he had a fix for this. A Tag Team Battle Royal sounded solid in theory, until Braun Strowman blew those plans up. The Big Man stormed to the ring alone and destroyed every team. Technically Braun won, but we have no idea what that means since one performer has never won the tag belts. As I sit on the tarmac amongst The Great Lakes, I reflect on a weird show. Vince does some things that make a smart mark cringe while opening up interesting possibilities elsewhere. Sometimes though, it feels like the good stuff is there to counteract the stupid. Most of us wish there was no stupid at all. Hopefully, there is less stupid on our next trip over Fly Over Country. Come with me, won’t you?

 

 

Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - 4 Corners Podcast (sports)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Nefarious Means

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - 30 Mindless Minutes

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast: The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history) Unidentified History (Ufology) & Game Gone Wrong (Game of Thrones Universe)


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Cheap Shots

MadMan: She’s Handing Out Blues Better Than A Namesake Will

Madman decided to follow his blue dragon back towards the titans! Let’s see what black magic he weaves in this edition.

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Madman decided to follow his blue dragon back towards the titans! Let’s see what black magic he weaves in this edition.

I may not be in regular rotation, but when they give me a chair, I swing for my fences. As a decades-long consumer of the art, I don’t have many left. The only Home Runs WWE has placed within my scope, can be found in Women’s Division on both Monday Night Raw & SmackDown Live.

The year I began watching wrestling, some very interesting circumstances took place surrounding cable television. WTBS; (Atlanta), WAS the home of The NWA’s Jim Crockett Promotions. At least until “Black Saturday,” which ultimately saw Vinnie Jr. Hijack the famous 6:05 time slot. This nearly cause riots among cable viewers opposed to McMahon’s product and presentation.

Though the million dollar ransom The Crocketts paid to get their flagship spot back on the dial gave the head of Titan Sports the backbone to finance WrestleMania, which helped to wreck most of the territories. Hell, it can be argued somewhat convincingly upon its 30th Anniversary, Vince himself ruined his biggest display’s pristine intentions for two consecutive years with Lesnar beating the streak instead of Bray Wyatt; and, Sting losing his ONLY Mania match because someone else had the right bride on their marriage license.

Despite the objections of both smarks and sheep in certain cases, we must respect the history of this pop culture institution. IF WrestleMania is Woodstock, it is only appropriate that Tito Santana opened the show with a victory!

In recent years, there has been only one person on The Main Roster who has matched the swag of Santana’s initial accomplishment without even trying, and she wrestled in the last Mania Match I cared about. Finally got tired of giving fans The Blues. She’s ready to deal some out in the form of steel chairs and God knows what else.

“Cut Her talent LOOSE!” We kept screaming. “A REAL run with Gold, PLEASE?” Like a kid aching just before Christmas. As with Solis, she was a true pro, until the strangest thing I’ve ever seen in the modern art form washed over us.

Fans and insiders alike FORGOT about Social Media! Don’t get me wrong, it’s still here. Can’t get away from it. Hell, I’m doing a roll-in on the internet right now! If you’ve been fans of us long enough, you’ll realize that last sentence was not a botch! Seriously, this thing felt like the territories back in the day. No one knew a damn thing! Even some of those paid to know were flipping a coin every five minutes. Thanks for the constant stress, you ancient prick!

Come on folks. If you know my current wrestling HEART at all, you KNEW the last Chair Shot on her return was coming from her Super Mark in Middle America! When older dudes at this circus describe what true fandom is like; they’ll often say: “That’s bulls***, that’s bulls***, that’s bulls***, BUT THAT’S REAL!”

For her boatloads of fans and the woman herself, Christmas is here! The Stamford’s latest Blues enthusiast is very real, And WWE’s Black Magic Woman IS BACK! Line ’em up. they’re all falling. Charlotte & Ronda too. To The Man and those in charge of her Twitter Account, thanks for keeping the possibility top of mind when things first got weird. We never gave up, but you will! MISSED YOU LADY BANKS!

Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - 4 Corners Podcast (sports)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Nefarious Means

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - 30 Mindless Minutes

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast: The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history) Unidentified History (Ufology) & Game Gone Wrong (Game of Thrones Universe)


Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

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Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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Fake News

Rob: Ronda Rousey & The Makings Of A Wrestling Newz Story

RONDA IS NEWZ!

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WWE Ronda Rousey UFC Championship

Ronda Rousey dominates headlines on the Road To WrestlMania, making her the perfect example for Rob to use for Wrestling Newz!

This is a continuation of what I started on last week in regards to wrestling media.  You might want to, in fact you should, go check that out first.  But instead of just hitting the media at large it’s time to drill down a bit and see how some of this stuff takes shape.  These stories don’t get clicked on and believed by so many people just out of whole cloth, they take weeks and months and sometimes years of narratives being laid down first in order to make the premise believable in the first place.

Remember, the three rules for publishing NEWZ stories:

  1. It’s plausible (translation: circumstances exist that make it possible, and it confirms an existing opinion)
  2. Can you walk it back easy if it ends up false (‘plans changed’)
  3. Will people click on it?  (if #1 is a yes, and the names are big enough then this is a yes, too)

A quick example that I mentioned previously was the ‘Lacey Evans getting a top level push after Ronda Rousey leaves’ story.  The story itself ended up just being Meltzer giving his opinion and not even leaked info from a source, but it relied on a long standing narrative about the WWE creative team, particularly Vince’s preferences.  Lacey is blond, and it’s been a long held belief that Vince loves his blond women so there you go (that’s not false, but there are some layers and nuances to it that we never get into).  Also, the way Lacey portrays her character (super conservative and a throwback to the Mad Men era) on social media irritates a lot of so called smart fans, which supposedly is something Vince loves doing.  That’s it.  Seriously, the plausibility of the story all lies in Lacey being blond, evoking thoughts of every blond woman Vince has pushed from Trish Stratus to Charlotte Flair and Alexa Bliss, and because she pisses off a section of Wrestling Twitter so Vince might do it just to get to us.  There is literally no other there there.

Now not all NEWZ stories end up false but even when they’re true the intent wasn’t to inform you, it was to get you to click on the link and share it (Hate shares count as much for the click numbers as love shares, btw.  Don’t help people whose work you hate by sharing it.)

Which brings us to the real subject of this piece: Ronda Rousey’s speculated departure from WWE after WrestleMania.  It has become almost gospel truth that Ronda is gone after the biggest show of the year, maybe for good, because she wants to start a family (and now also because she can’t hack it in the world of wrestling).  Meltzer has weighed in and there are multiple pieces that simply copied and pasted or transcribed his words along with dubious headlines.  Now before you say ‘yeah, she is leaving’ ask yourself where you got the idea from.  Was it from someone stating it as fact, just giving their opinion, or one of those ‘WWE is preparing for the possibility that Ronda might leave’ stories?  And how did so many of us end up thinking so quickly and strongly that come the Monday after WrestleMania 35 she’s outta here?  The story was built on a few blocks and because a big house of confirmation bias.  Here they are:

Ronda Rousey is an outsider who doesn’t really want to be here anyway

This essentially comes from Ronda being an MMA legend, which invokes bad thoughts of Brock Lesnar his big paycheck/small schedule agreement.  That’s it.  Ronda left MMA after losing and didn’t do much afterwards, and she’s made a ton of money already, so this clearly has to just be a big score…..right?  She didn’t toil in the indies, didn’t even do a stint in NXT, and since she wasn’t willing to pay her dues (that sound you just heard was me throwing up) it’s obvious that she doesn’t really care for it………sure, buddy, whatever you think.  Nevermind all the evidence we’ve seen to the contrary.

Ronda Rousey can’t handle the road

A video clip surfaced a few months back of Ronda lamenting life on the road in the WWE.  Now it probably isn’t much different from what many newbies and veterans of the business have said to their families but hey, let’s take this out for a ride because it supports point number one.

Ronda Rousey is losing at WrestleMania

We got no proof of this but we do know that the original plan was for her to face Charlotte one on one (with Charlotte probably winning), we know that Becky Lynch has become the hot act over the last six months, and we know that Ronda hasn’t lost yet so WrestleMania seems like the right time to do it.  That’s it.  I explained my rationale for each woman winning that match here, and in my opinion there’s plenty of logic for Ronda winning.  But so far a lot of us have assumed she isn’t because she just has to lose here, right?  Which leads to the next brick:

Ronda Rousey can’t take losing

She didn’t handle losing well in MMA, so she obviously isn’t going to like losing in WWE and she’ll want to take her ball and go home.  There is no evidence to back this up but it sure sounds good.

Ronda Rousey is freaking out because of the crowd noise and the Tweeting from Becky

Ronda isn’t great at promos, the crowds are booing her more now because she’s facing Becky, and she’s fired off some far out responses to Becky’s twitter jabs that suggest maybe the ribbing is getting to her.  So she must clearly be having some kind of emotional meltdown that is souring her on the world of pro wrestling.  Again we have don’t have any confirmed facts as to her true emotional state (for all we know it’s a work that’s gone a little off the rails) but it sure feels good to type that she just can’t handle the banter.


Now we have the proverbial feedback loop.  We think Ronda doesn’t love the business, she hates the road, she wants to start a family, we just know she’s losing at WrestleMania, she doesn’t handle losing well at all, and now she can’t handle the ribbing.    Each one of these things feeds into the others, and if you were a Ronda skeptic from day one or you just don’t like her for other reasons then each one of these things is very easy to believe individually, as it’s consequently very easy to put them together into one big ball of what is sure to happen.  Remember always that the way NEWZ works, be it in wrestling media, other forms of entertainment, and even politics is that they bait you with things you want to be true based on what you already have come to believe.  If you believe wrestler X is a jerk then everything that backs it up is believable no matter how flimsy the evidence.  Here we have a bunch of ‘truths’ based on little real information that feed into what a lot of people already thought, and now we have one big ‘truth’ that we just know to be true.

Of course if Ronda wins at WrestleMania, loses some time later, and sticks around for the rest of her contract then the vaunted wrestling media can just give us the tried and true explanation for everything that doesn’t pan out the way they led us to think it would:

Plans changed.

Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - 4 Corners Podcast (sports)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Nefarious Means

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - 30 Mindless Minutes

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast: The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history) Unidentified History (Ufology) & Game Gone Wrong (Game of Thrones Universe)


Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

All Shows On Demand


Powered by RedCircle


Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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