Cheap Shots
CheapShots: Shakedown, Breakdown, Let’s Bust ’em Up Twice
Cheap Shots are unfiltered, uncensored opinions, and those opinions reflect only the author!
Quick New England turnaround in the big bird as we hit the Capitol city of the smallest state in the country. So much for thinking Round 2 of The Superstar Shakeup would be less insane because SmackDown Live is a shorter show. Once again. passengers are instructed to grab their oxygen masks and take a deep breath. Air sickness bags won’t be required. Tuesdays tend to make more sense at this circus. Show starts as AJ Styles’ music hits. The WWE Champion is frustrated. Who wouldn’t be after repeated shots to the little rocks? The Phenomenal One wants a fight. His request is answered, but The Artist Formerly Known As is nowhere in sight. Instead, it’s Rusev Day. A match between Styles and The Lion of Bulgaria ends in a schmoz when Aiden English jumps AJ to avoid a quick finish. A 2-on-1 attack leads Daniel Bryan to make the save.
Shakeup craziness starts when Shelton Benjamin comes out solo. Chad Gable has moved to Raw. More on that as necessary. Brock’s college buddy cuts a heel promo on his former partner while asking for “big competition”. Okay Shelton, can you handle a Viper? Except, Randy Orton and his music are hijacked half-way up the aisle. It’s Jeff Hardy, and my Seth Rollins to SmackDown prediction was DEAD wrong. Jeff was sent to RAW to bring The United States Championship back to Tuesdays. Just Creative making sure smart marks are still clueless sometimes, nice swerve!
In a slight bit of strangeness, Orton looked on from the ramp without getting involved. Benjamin is a veteran ace, but there is no way Vince was giving him Gold last night. It was a solid match. The Charismatic Enigma won clean with A Twist of Fate & Swanton Bomb. Betting Cowboy Bob’s Kid will continue lurking in the weeds assuming Hardy gets passed Jinder Mahal in the desert. For once in your obnoxious life; Vinnie, don’t turn this into a triple-threat when it isn’t necessary. Otherwise you’ll add more credence to my Mahal/Carmella comparison.
We have now entered the squash portion of the program. Although Superstar Shakeup goosebumps for most smart marks and sheep would return shortly. First, there was a singles match between Harper and Jey Uso with each man’s partner at ringside. This was over quickly. Harper went over. Intensity did not dissipate after the bell as Jey was knocked unconscious. The Bludgeon Brothers then turned their brutality to Jimmy, tossing him easily around the outside. The Samoan’s painful exodus halted at the ring steps. The ginormous Tag Team Champions threatened to squash his head with a mallet. Fourth Wall Alert: This brought a freaked-out Naomi from the back to protect her husband. Luckily, the monsters showed some mercy and left. Good luck finding a team to take The Gold off of them.
Next in-ring action finds Hunico waiting for opposition. For blind marks and other sheep. There’s only been ONE Sin Cara! The real deal is apparently competing for a top promotion in Mexico. In the current art form: only Rey Mysterio EVER moved on the same wavelength. Unfortunately, The Faceless One is the closest thing I’ve seen to a human piñata. It’s hard to perform in The American Style; acrobat or not, if you are constantly injured. Even though Vince is clueless in terms of handling his kind of talent, WWE fans were blessed they blinked long enough to see him. Guessing my passengers weren’t expecting to find that soapbox in cargo. Please stand by as we return to The Superstar Shakeup. The knockoff was ready to be a carpenter for…. Samoa Joe! Joe beat him in under five mins. leaving the rest of the fighter’s time for a promo. C’mon Joe; please don’t have a heart attack while holding a microphone. Don’t forget to breathe. If he can stay healthy, this could be fun. Otherwise, I am shoot scared for him.
Cut backstage: Rene Young is interviewing Daniel Bryan. She asks him why he helped AJ Styles. The American Dragon says he respects The Champ. During his three-year fight, Styles’ name was at the top of his list of potential matches upon his return. Suddenly, Daniel stops mid-sentence and looks up. Rene stops, slowly pointing the mic upward. First, we don’t see a face, but the physique is unmistakable. We haven’t seen Big Cass since his knee injury months ago. “This is what all the hype is about?” This just got good!
In a pathetic reminder of Stamford stupidity, sheep are taken from Incredible potential to an unnecessary waste of space with The Mellabration. Thankfully, The Fake Wrestler was interrupted by Charlotte. Given the level of last week’s Down Under beatdown, I was shocked. Slowly, Second Nature came to the ring, poking holes in Carmella’s Kleenex. Bringing up the mugging from last week. Even mentioning a certain chinless freak! PREACH! The Iconics came out to interrupt things; recapping the assault and congratulating Blondie Circus on wasting time. The Sexy Koalas tried to press repeat on last week until Becky Lynch ran down for backup. One of The Aussies made her competitive debut. It was Billie Kaye. She was impressive, but give Charlotte prep time, and any girl’s in trouble. Kaye tapped out to The Figure Eight with Peyton Royce at ringside; and Carmella looking bored at the commentary table. About as bored as me watching her steal money. Bell rings, heels jump Charlotte and Becky 3-on-2. Who did The Superstar Shakeup send to make the save? The Rising Sun Mystic! At even strength, the arrogant heels left in serious pain.
Main Event time! After the Rusev/Styles contest ended with a run-in from Aiden English, our new GM had to do something. With a better bounce than Teddy Long EVER had, Paige makes the obvious tag match between Styles & Bryan and Rusev Day. The match was good for just over ten minutes before The Artist Formerly Known As came through the crowd. At this point, AJ Styles wishers he was a Mounds instead of an Almond Joy. Not to mention, Big Cass ran in and kicked Daniel Bryan’s head off! No parrot should put a microphone in Shinsuke Nakamura’s face. He’s not gonna answer you! Alright Pale Rider, find two baby faces and make the 8-man tag match next week. That show was a pin ball game. I can certainly see why a ton of fans think SmackDown Live made out better than RAW with The Superstar Shakeup. However, my heart will always be where I can find Mercedes. I will see my passengers in St. Louis next week. Safe travels everyone!
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
Classic POD is WAR
Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
Powered by RedCircle
Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
Cheap Shots
MadMan: She’s Handing Out Blues Better Than A Namesake Will
Madman decided to follow his blue dragon back towards the titans! Let’s see what black magic he weaves in this edition.
Madman decided to follow his blue dragon back towards the titans! Let’s see what black magic he weaves in this edition.
I may not be in regular rotation, but when they give me a chair, I swing for my fences. As a decades-long consumer of the art, I don’t have many left. The only Home Runs WWE has placed within my scope, can be found in Women’s Division on both Monday Night Raw & SmackDown Live.
The year I began watching wrestling, some very interesting circumstances took place surrounding cable television. WTBS; (Atlanta), WAS the home of The NWA’s Jim Crockett Promotions. At least until “Black Saturday,” which ultimately saw Vinnie Jr. Hijack the famous 6:05 time slot. This nearly cause riots among cable viewers opposed to McMahon’s product and presentation.
Though the million dollar ransom The Crocketts paid to get their flagship spot back on the dial gave the head of Titan Sports the backbone to finance WrestleMania, which helped to wreck most of the territories. Hell, it can be argued somewhat convincingly upon its 30th Anniversary, Vince himself ruined his biggest display’s pristine intentions for two consecutive years with Lesnar beating the streak instead of Bray Wyatt; and, Sting losing his ONLY Mania match because someone else had the right bride on their marriage license.
Despite the objections of both smarks and sheep in certain cases, we must respect the history of this pop culture institution. IF WrestleMania is Woodstock, it is only appropriate that Tito Santana opened the show with a victory!
In recent years, there has been only one person on The Main Roster who has matched the swag of Santana’s initial accomplishment without even trying, and she wrestled in the last Mania Match I cared about. Finally got tired of giving fans The Blues. She’s ready to deal some out in the form of steel chairs and God knows what else.
“Cut Her talent LOOSE!” We kept screaming. “A REAL run with Gold, PLEASE?” Like a kid aching just before Christmas. As with Solis, she was a true pro, until the strangest thing I’ve ever seen in the modern art form washed over us.
Fans and insiders alike FORGOT about Social Media! Don’t get me wrong, it’s still here. Can’t get away from it. Hell, I’m doing a roll-in on the internet right now! If you’ve been fans of us long enough, you’ll realize that last sentence was not a botch! Seriously, this thing felt like the territories back in the day. No one knew a damn thing! Even some of those paid to know were flipping a coin every five minutes. Thanks for the constant stress, you ancient prick!
Come on folks. If you know my current wrestling HEART at all, you KNEW the last Chair Shot on her return was coming from her Super Mark in Middle America! When older dudes at this circus describe what true fandom is like; they’ll often say: “That’s bulls***, that’s bulls***, that’s bulls***, BUT THAT’S REAL!”
For her boatloads of fans and the woman herself, Christmas is here! The Stamford’s latest Blues enthusiast is very real, And WWE’s Black Magic Woman IS BACK! Line ’em up. they’re all falling. Charlotte & Ronda too. To The Man and those in charge of her Twitter Account, thanks for keeping the possibility top of mind when things first got weird. We never gave up, but you will! MISSED YOU LADY BANKS!
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
Classic POD is WAR
Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
Powered by RedCircle
Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
Cheap Shots
Mad Man’s Spinal Tap & 20 Questions
Back to back weeks we see the Mad Man come to play in our sandbox. Does this article go to 11? Are the retread concepts, just hollow nowadays?
Back to back weeks we see the Mad Man come to play in our sandbox! Does this article go to 11?
When you have decades of experience watching the art form, your eyes and thought processes change. It’s the reason my colleagues can break down pending news and angles we haven’t seen yet. Mr. Meltzer made a cottage industry out of it. A ton of people on The Internet are trying to follow suit. Then, there are fans like me. As much as I love twitter, Professional Wrestling fans were never meant to receive “spoilers” every day.
This is NOT a “Back in my day…” thing. My eyes have changed too. However, I am focused more on WWE’s calendar when watching Stamford’s offering. If I think about wrestling. it’s very simple. My suspension of disbelief is gone for very few performers. In fact, I would say it’s gone for most fans. If we know it’s a work, why are scripts and outcomes still based on the assumption that we don’t? If I have seen a gimmick before, I am VERY hard to impress. Make me believe you can beat somebody; and stand out doing so, or I will chew you up and spit you the Hell out.
For those who say I should keep my mouth shut because I can’t perform and never have, I DON’T CARE! Saint Dave gets a pass, and y’all still watch the current product like his lap dogs and clones, despite “knowing’ the outcome? I don’t watch for the outcome anymore. Based on character development and pushes, I can see that coming. Call me a hypocrite and I will play 20 Questions with you. Can you get me to the finish line without looking like an idiot or a laughable copy of someone else?
Su Yung is 5’6’’ish. Marks and sheep world wide are transfixed and petrified? Make up aside, why? She is impersonating three legends with no unique move set and doing it very badly. Without her zombies, can she beat anybody? Mr. Calloway used druids. He was 6’10’’ and did not need them to kick your ass. Mick Foley put himself and you through HELL before using The Mandible Claw. You had no choice but to take it. The Great Muta was arguably the best Rising Sun performer of all time. He had a move set most American fans had never seen before. The Mist was believable in his hands because audience and opponent were spinning trying to keep up with him. Where is Su Yung’s Mysticism? As much as fans love her, there are no OMG moments in her matches, and her gimmick is predicated on them.
She is far from the only example. Twitter went crazy about a month ago because a top name on the indies put something in her opponent’s mouth during a match. Outside of a prison fight, when would this EVER HAPPEN? Why is this necessary? If this is a work, why would any girl allow someone to do this? Tell me why either woman gets hired again without the parrot response? Same question applies to Joseph. Dude ain’t pickin’ up anybody like that in real life. I dare him to pick my wheelchair up with his finish. He would be in traction.
Tony Schiavone is our crazy wrestling fan uncle. Our memories of him when we were kids and teenagers all ROCK! He is without question one of the best to ever call the action. God Bless Conrad Flair for bringing him back to the art form. Among other fun stuff, he now does commentary for MLW. With tongue firmly planted in cheek; I must say, I have a slight problem with him. I understand that it is his job. He continues to put MJF over because?? I get the gimmick. It’s just OLD! He is ripping off The Miz. One look at him, and you can see that. “I have more money than you.” So did DiBiase. And if you did, you wouldn’t need the $50.00 a night you made before Tony started calling your matches because you’d be paying him. Just wait until Mike retires before you go to New York.
Finally, we arrive at the biggest tent. Vinnie’s circus was on The West Coast in The House of Hot Rod & Billy Jack Haynes. Sheep under 25 are now asking a three-worded question. The only help you’ll get from me is to say that he may have been the father of Modern Independent Wrestling. Sometimes, it wasn’t his choice, and he is still fighting demons today.
Back to this week. Didn’t Spinal Tap all stand in the Center Ring around a month ago and do a babyface promo? “It’s our fault. We’ll do better for you. This is YOUR product.” First, I believe Stephanie as a babyface as much as I believe Saint Richard as a babyface. Shut up and go home as a shoot. Second, as big a moron as Vince is, he’s NOT leaving the person carrying the big top out of WrestleMania! Outside of the obvious, Becky’s leg is a work. SHE WAS LIMPING ON THE WRONG ONE ON MONDAY! Seth Rollins is hurt as a shoot. He WASN’T at Monday Night Raw. If Becky wasn’t cleared, she wouldn’t be on either show. So WHY is everybody going apes*** over this?
Sometimes, I can’t tell which group is Spinal Tap?
Is it the group on stage or the sheep who believe what they’re watching? I truly wish this art form was treated more like real competition.
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
Classic POD is WAR
Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
Powered by RedCircle
Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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