Top 5: Uses For Hulk Hogan in 2018

Some big WWE news happened outside the ring over the weekend. Hulk Hogan was reinstated into the WWE Hall of Fame. Most of us weren’t aware that he was booted out of the mythical wrestling museum after his sex tape fiasco, but it was apparently a thing. He was backstage at Extreme Rules, which of course led to everybody wondering if he would appear on the show or not.

Hulk Hogan doesn’t have a deal with WWE yet, but we all assume it’s coming. What do you do with a wrestling legend that’s approaching the age of 65 & can’t be the top guy anymore?

I’ve got five ideas.

5. Be A Star Ambassador

There’s been a lot of backlash to Hogan’s return under the WWE umbrella. His lack of a real apology for his statements has many fans disgusted with his presence and wondering what he did to be allowed back in WWE’s good graces. The best way to deal with this issue? Have Hulk make a real apology.

Have him be a star too. He’s always been about making appearances at schools to spread the right message, so him being part of WWE’s anti-bullying campaign makes sense. It can also help rebuild his image & convince the doubters that he’s a changed man.

4. Raw Color Commentator

I admit this idea is a little tricky. If the Hulkster replaced Jonathan Coachman (who I think most of us agree needs replacing at the moment), the optics of WWE replacing a black man with Hulk Hogan would be really really bad.

So he would have to replace Corey Graves. Which might not be the best choice for our listening pleasure, but Graves could use a night or two off here & there. I would suggest taking him off of SmackDown, but WWE just came out with a “Shut Up Saxton” t-shirt so you have to keep them together.

3. Universal Champion

Ok. I know I said I was going to stick to semi-realistic things he could actually do. I’m not even sure Hogan could work a match again. The brother isn’t getting any younger or any less broken down.

That being said, I still think he can handle Brock Lesnar’s schedule. And we already saw a Goldberg Universal Title reign. The belt is what it is, and Hogan holding it fits the profile.

2. Manager of Andre the Giant Panda

WWE has great interest in many talents that made it big in Japan. We know they’ll be offering multiple members of the New Japan roster the moon, if for no other reason than to shoot down this North American invasion that NJPW is trying to do. Talent raids are how Vincent Kennedy McMahon has played the game since Day One. His successors don’t seem to be any different.

There’s one key Japanese talent that isn’t in New Japan though. This individual was named the Rookie of the Year in the 2017 Indie Awards. I feel he would be tremendously popular in WWE, but he has one main weakness. He doesn’t speak English. Or Japanese. Or human.

It’s Andre the Giant Panda!

At nearly ten feet tall, Andre is darn near unbeatable. His Giant Press is impossible to kick out of. The only thing he needs to be a major star in WWE is a mouthpiece. Who better than the Hulkster? Given Hogan’s love & admiration for Andre the Giant, it would be logical for him to support a panda named in honor of the Eighth Wonder of the World.

Honorable Mention: AWA Revival

C’mon, it was Verne Gagne who created WrestleMania and we all know it!

1. Crowd Conductor

It seems like every major WWE event has one thing in common. Fans’ biggest complaint is the behavior of the fans in attendance. They’re not reacting enough, or they’re reacting the wrong way.

Sunday’s Extreme Rules show will most be remembered for the fans continually counting down to zero during the Iron Man match. The online backlash was immense, and there’s no doubt that other crowds will try to emulate the Pittsburgh crowd in order to get attention. I’ve never been big on telling fans how to react to things, but it’s becoming a problem for WWE’s presentation.

Hulk can fix this. Put him somewhere in the arena. Maybe a platform next to the hard cam. He can be up on the scoreboard showing the crowd how to react to each segment. He’d be like a human applause sign. Fans have blindly followed the Hulkster for years, so if anybody can pull this off, he can.