Raw holds an ALL MIGHTY Championship Celebration for Bobby Lashley!

Bobby Lashley is WWE World Champion, and the Hurt Business now rules Monday Night Raw! But will their celebration plans go smoothly?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

• WWE World Championship: Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS The Miz w/ John Morrison; Lashley wins and retains the title.
• No Disqualifications: Sheamus VS Drew McIntyre; Draw by referee stoppage.
• Xavier Woods w/ Kofi Kingston VS Shelton Benjamin w/ The Hurt Business; Woods wins.
• Matt Riddle VS Slapjack w/ Retribution; Riddle wins.
• WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler VS Naomi & Lana; Jax & Baszler win and retain the titles.
• AJ Styles w/ Omos VS Randy Orton; Styles wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

The Hurt Business walks backstage.

MVP says they’re living different lives and breathing that rarified air. Sarah asks for a few words and the others move on. Lashley says he is a happy man, and it will stay that way. Lashley’s been through a lot that would’ve broken a normal man. But Lashley isn’t normal, he’s All Mighty! Think about the 16 years. 16 YEARS as he watched others get what he deserved and dealt with backstage politics. So when Lashley beat Miz last week, he punished him for delaying the inevitable! Now Miz gets a rematch? Well Lashley will set an example with it. What happens to Miz will happen to everyone else that steps to him.

16 years is way too damn long to wait for the title, and Lashley vows to walk into WrestleMania as the All Might World Champion! The All Might Era has begun, but it will be tested to start the night!

The Miz & John Morrison go to the ring.

The Hollywood A-Lister gets the mic and says, “I stand in this ring empty handed because Bobby Lashley is the new WWE Champion.” But he asks Morrison that last week, did Miz expect to get his ass handed to him by Lashley? Yeah, actually. Correct. Did he expect to lose the title? No. Correct! But Shane McMahon pulled a fast one! After everything Miz has done for the WWE, from media to interviews to reality shows to photoshoots and sleepless nights, endless tasks without thanks, no vacations or injuries! But when Miz says his body isn’t feeling well, everyone should believe him!

But they didn’t, did they? “You” sit in your couches and Miz is a professional and that is what happens to professional athletes! Miz had stomach cramps!! But Miz still went out and successfully defended his title! There was a match! It was a count-out! Miz lost, but the only way a champion can lose his title is pin or submission in the ring! That’s called Champion’s Advantage! Is it shady? OF COURSE! But Miz played to his advantage and outsmarted everyone! Miz outsmarted the superstars, the fans, EVERYONE! Miz got counted out intentionally, but Lashley had his chance and blew it! The title contract says you must defend the title and Miz did that. It didn’t say he had to do it twice in one night!

And yet, Miz was forced to do so. Threatened, even! Miz was told to defend the title he worked so hard to get, or he would be stripped of it and it’d just be given to Lashley! And to put icing on the cake, Shane McMahon makes the match a LUMBERJACK MATCH! Miz is sure we can all agree that that was just unfair. It is also unfair that Lashley brutalized Miz after the match, with no repercussions! But WWE did one thing right, and that is tonight’s rematch.

Miz explains that everyone online was CELEBRATING Lashley’s win all week this week! Miz wants all of us to stay close to our devices because tonight there will be a new hashtag, #ANDNEW! Because he’s the Miz, and he’s… AWWWWWWSOOOOOME! Miz is motivated, but will it be enough to turn back the clock and take back the title?

WWE World Championship: Bobby Lashley w/ MVP VS The Miz w/ John Morrison!

Raw returns as the Rocky Mountain Machine makes his entrance, which now has GOLD LIGHTNING, and a ferocious new titantron package. The introductions are made, the title is raised, and this mighty main event worthy rematch opens Raw!

The two circle, Miz is wary of Lashley, as he should be. Miz bails out to cool off. He gets back in because of Lashley’s Champion’s Advantage but Miz bails out again. MVP is there and startles Miz but Lashley gets his head! Miz hotshots Lashley but that only angers him! Lashley drags Miz up to a suplex and holds him up for a count of 10 before the SLAM! Drew McIntyre watches backstage as Lashley RAMS Miz into the corner and then RAMS his shoulder in over an dover! Lashley CLUBS Miz, runs corner to corner but Miz moves and Lashley POSTS himself! Lashley tumbles out, Miz pursues, but Lashley still scoops Miz!

Miz slips off to POST Lashley again! But Lashley still CLOBBERS Miz! Lashley snarls as he stands tall and Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Lashley grinds Miz down with a neck wrench, and a fist digging into Miz’s jaw! Miz fights up with body shots, Lashley shoves Miz to ropes to then CLOBBER him again! Morrison coaches Miz up but Lashley drags Miz away from the apron! Miz kicks at Lashley and gets him away. Miz is in a corner, Lashley runs in but misses, Miz returns with the A-LIST- NO! Lashley catches Miz, to TOSS him! McIntyre is still watching as Lashley goes out to THROW Miz into barriers! Lashley looms over Miz, drags him up and gives him SNAKE EYES to the barrier! Miz clutches his ribs but Lashley follows him to bounce him off the desk!

Lashley puts Miz back in the ring and MVP says to finish this. Lashley runs but into a boot! Lashley just gets angrier, and he lifts Miz. Miz slips off to BOOT again! Miz swings but into a clinch! Miz throws elbows, Lashley shoves Miz, but Miz dumps Lashley out! Miz builds speed to slide for a dropkick, but Lashley dodges him to fireman’s carry! Lashley POSTS Miz!! Miz flounders but is somehow okay to continue, so Lashley drags him back into the ring. Lashley storms over to Miz but Miz asks for mercy. Miz gets no mercy, he gets the COMPLETE SHOT! Lashley rains down fists! Lashley digs his fingers into Miz’s face, but lets off as the ref counts.

Lashley whips Miz, pops him up and hits the ALL MIGHTY SPINEBUSTER! Lashley grits his teeth as he waits for Miz to get back up. HURT LOCK!! Miz is a rag doll, he taps out, Lashley wins!

Winner: Bobby Lashley, by submission (still WWE World Champion)

The Miz didn’t win, but that was still awesome for the Chief Hurt Officer! Lashley leaves Miz in his rearview, will he barrel through the Fastlane and on to WrestleMania?

Backstage interview with Drew McIntyre.

As the presumed challenger- NO, he is the ONLY challenger! McIntyre says Lashley worked for 16 years, putting in the work in and out of the ring. Lashley didn’t go for the big one, he beat McIntyre down to set Miz up and then he could beat THE MIZ! McIntyre beat Brock Lesnar! Where is the passion, the heart and the BALLS, Lashley!? Lashley is big, bad and dangerous, but so is McIntyre. But wait! Sheamus attacks McIntyre! Their match last week didn’t finish anything! The Celtic Warrior TOSSES the Scottish Warrior all over backstage!

Sheamus shouts that NOTHING is over! He spent TWENTY YEARS IN MCINTYRE’S SHADOW!! Sheamus swears to make McIntyre pay for the rest of his miserable life! Sheamus storms off and McIntyre gets up in a rage. Will these two warriors battle until there’s nothing left of either of them?

Raw returns and McIntyre is still raging.

Adam Pearce comes by and McIntyre demands he set up a rematch of him and Sheamus, No Disqualifications! Pearce agrees to that and McIntyre storms off. Will that match end things between McIntyre and Sheamus?

R-Truth finds Braun Strowman backstage.

Truth wants to get something off his chest so hopefully Braun forgives him. Truth reads his note and says, “Dear Braun, Bugs Bunny has gone to the dark side and joined the Monstars. The only way I can get my baby back is with my own Monstar. So as Monday Night Raw’s Monstar Among Men, I need your help. But before that, there’s a lot I need to apologize for.” Truth apologizes for that escape tunnel, for submitting that video of Braun to Monster Quest, for ruining Hornswoggle’s wedding, for stealing his dentist’s goldfish and releasing it back to the ocean.

Braun stops Truth and doesn’t want an apology from him. Braun is asking- No, no, the Monster Among Men doesn’t ask, he DEMANDS an apology from Shane McMahon! Oh, okay. Truth apologizes for that. And in that case, this never happened. HE’s a fragment of Braun’s imagination. Truth tries to use a neuralizer pen on Braun? Well it clearly doesn’t work. But with that, Braun is heading for the ring! Will he get what he wants from Shane O’Mac?

Raw returns as Braun goes to the ring!

The Monster Among Men may misunderstand the reasons he was kept out of the Elimination Chamber, but he didn’t misunderstand Shane messing with him last week. “First you exclude me from the Elimination Chamber match, and I get it. I’m over it. But then you give me a Raw Tag Team Championship, and out of anybody, you choose Adam Pearce? Then you jump on the apron and make me tag him in, so he can get beat.” Is this some big joke to Shane? Is Shane getting a nice laugh out of this? But you’re either laughing with him, or laughing at him. And after that remark about a textbook being over Braun’s reading level, Braun is thinking Shane is laughing at him.

But to get real, that can’t be the case. Because we all know that if Braun wanted to, he could snap Shane like a twig! But saying that, Braun also knows Shane could just fire him on the spot. Braun isn’t looking to get fired, just for respect. The longer Braun stands here and thinks about it, the angrier he gets! So he isn’t asking, but DEMANDING Shane give him that apology! Shane McMahon is here! He goes out to the ring to join Braun, and Braun gets right in his face. Shane tells Braun that he apologizes, then leaves the ring. Braun seems almost surprised that Shane did that.

But then, Shane stops on stage, thinks about saying more, but doesn’t. Braun dares Shane to say what he wants to say! When Shane doesn’t, Braun grumbles. Is this not settled between Monster and management?

Backstage interview with Shane McMahon.

Melissa asks Shane what those further comments to Braun were. Shane says maybe later. But will later ever come?

No Disqualifications: Sheamus VS Drew McIntyre!

Somehow, someway, The Fella feels like his friend for roughly 20 years doesn’t see him as an equal. Things were brought to a breaking point as WWE hit the Road to WrestleMania, and though McIntyre won last week, that only angered Sheamus more! Will Sheamus use No Disqualifications to his advantage and leave McIntyre on the side of the road this close to Fastlane?

McIntyre jumps Sheamus on the stage! McIntyre gets even with Sheamus and he throws him into barriers! And then into the steel steps! And then RAMS him into the apron! The ref says to get in the ring so McIntyre puts Sheamus in. The bell sounds and McIntyre fires off fists and stomps! McIntyre CHOPS Sheamus, Sheamus kicks back and throws EuroUppers. McIntyre throws haymakers, Sheamus returns them, they brawl, but Sheamus headlocks. McIntyre powers out but Sheamus runs him over! Things speed up, McIntyre blocks the hip toss to whip and run Sheamus over! McIntyre brings Sheamus up for haymakers and has him in the corner for more.

Sheamus claws McIntyre’s face! Sheamus CLUBS and KNEES McIntyre, then whips him corner to corner. Sheamus runs in but McIntyre elbows him away. McIntyre hops up but Sheamus YANKS him off the ropes! Sheamus stomps away on McIntyre at the ropes, then drags him up for hands. McIntyre shoves Sheamus then dumps him to the apron. Sheamus hotshots McIntyre back! Sheamus goes up, leaps, FLYING CLOTHESLINE! Cover, TWO! Sheamus seethes but he kicks McIntyre to the apron! McIntyre hobbles away but Sheamus LEAPS, only to miss! McIntyre RAMS Sheamus into steel steps again! McIntyre tells commentary to move, and he THROWS Sheamus over the desk!

McIntyre goes around to put Sheamus in a chair and rain down fists! The ring count is still a thing, so McIntyre brings Sheamus back over, but Sheamus shoves McIntyre into the apron! Sheamus CLOBBERS McIntyre then catches his breath. Sheamus looks under the ring and brings out a kendo stick! Sheamus swings but McIntyre ducks! The post takes the smack, and McIntyre kicks Sheamus. McIntyre whips Sheamus over the barrier! McIntyre takes a breath, leaves Sheamus behind, and fetches the base of steel steps! McIntyre drags Sheamus back over, scoops him, and SLAMS him on the stairs! Sheamus writhes but McIntyre drags him back up.

McIntyre puts Sheamus in the ring, grabs the kendo stick, and goes into the ring. but Sheamus KICKS the rope and stick into McIntyre! Then KNEES him, runs and CLOBBERS him! Sheamus takes back the kendo stick, takes aim and SMACKS McIntyre on the back! And again! And again! Sheamus stands on McIntyre’s head, focusing on the jaw! Sheamus lets off so he can stand McIntyre up and SMACK him in the stomach! Sheamus fireman’s carries for the ROLLING SENTON! Cover, TWO! Sheamus clamps onto McIntyre with fish hooks to the face! Sheamus stretches McIntyre’s mouth but fans rally up. McIntyre fights up but Sheamus knocks McIntyre down!

Sheamus aims again, but McIntyre clinches to block the kendo stick! OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY! And then ANOTHER! Sheamus runs in but McIntyre dodges to neckbreaker! And kip up! McIntyre gets the kendo stick back, and the two stare down. They rush in, and McIntyre SMACKS Sheamus! And SMACKS him! And SMACKS him! Then McIntyre uses the kendo stick in a Russian Leg Sweep! Cover, TWO! Sheamus survives but McIntyre keeps his focus. McIntyre has the beat-up kendo stick to SMACK Sheamus more! Sheamus bails out of the ring, McIntyre pursues and throws haymakers. McIntyre scoops but Sheamus slips off to POST McIntyre!

Sheamus drags McIntyre to the announce desk, to CHOKE SLAM him on it! The table doesn’t give but Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again and Sheamus brawls with McIntyre in the corner! McIntyre gets the edge but Sheamus pokes him in the eye! Sheamus hits the IRISH CURSE BACKBREAKER! Sheamus gets the legs and ties them up, McIntyre resists but Sheamus kicks him in the back! Sheamus gets McIntyre turned over for the CLOVERLEAF! McIntyre endures as Sheamus sits deep! McIntyre powers through to get under and throw haymakers from below! Sheamus lets go, McIntyre boots him! Sheamus comes back but McIntyre ROCKS him with a right! And then hits a SPINEBUSTER! McIntyre jackknife bridges but can’t quite hold it, TWO!!

McIntyre’s back is marked up and down but he fights through the pain. He runs at Sheamus in the corner but Sheamus BOOTS him down! Sheamus skins the cat to go up top, McIntyre runs over but Sheamus knees him away! Sheamus adjusts but McIntyre trips him up! McIntyre climbs up to join Sheamus now, CHOPS him, then rakes his eyes! McIntyre brings Sheamus up to SUPERPLEX!! Cover, TWO!! Sheamus survives and McIntyre is a bit surprised! McIntyre sits up, looks to the WrestleMania sign, and then he underhooks Sheamus. Sheamus fights free but McIntyre KICKS him! Only for Sheamus to get WHITE NOISE! Cover, TWO!!

Sheamus can’t believe McIntyre survived! Sheamus goes out and gets a chair! He returns to the ring, aims at McIntyre, but McIntyre JABS him in the throat! And then McIntyre has the chair, to SMACK Sheamus on the back! McIntyre hauls Sheamus back up, underhooks, FUTURE SHOCK to the chair!! Cover, TWO!!? Sheamus survives that DDT to steel and McIntyre can’t believe it! McIntyre gets up and paces about, but Sheamus crawls with the chair. McIntyre aims from the corner, counts us down, but BANG, chair to the head! BIG KNEE! Cover, TWO!?!? Sheamus is furious, but he grabs the chair again. He JAMS McIntyre’s ribs with it, then wedges the chair in a corner.

Sheamus catches his breath and steadies himself while McIntyre sputters on the mat. Sheamus hobbles over, drags McIntyre up, and whips him, only for McIntyre to reverse and RAM Sheamus into the corner chair! CLAYMORE!! But Sheamus tumbles out of the ring!! McIntyre goes out to fetch Sheamus to bring him up, but that bad back is making that harder. McIntyre gets Sheamus on the apron and in the ring, then follows after. Sheamus slides right back out, so McIntyre pursues, but Sheamus BROGUES McIntyre!! Sheamus goes to get the steel steps! Sheamus aims, but McIntyre has stairs, too! They COLLIDE with steel!! Both men go down, McIntyre tumbling over barriers!!

The referee checks on McIntyre and Sheamus in turn to see if they’re able to continue. Sheamus doesn’t respond, the ref says this is done!!

Referee Stoppage

Sheamus finally comes to and McIntyre finally sits up, but it’s not clear who won or lost this one! McIntyre tries to get up and walk but he stumbles into ThunderDome screens. Sheamus still struggles to sit up, but it is clear these two warriors have rage to spare. Will this only lead to both of them crashing and burning on the Road to WrestleMania?

Backstage interview with AJ Styles and Omos.

The newest correspondent, Kevin Patrick, asks Styles about the Road to WrestleMania and tensions running high. How- Whoa, whoa. Are we not going to talk about what’s going on with Randy Orton right now? Kevin has much to learn. But Styles will talk about Orton, and The Fiend. The Fiend hasn’t been around because Orton burned him to a  crisp! But then what’s happened since? Orton’s been haunted by both The Fiend and “Lil’ Miss Witch,” Alexa Bliss. This is the worst thing that Orton could’ve done! And now they’re tearing him down bit by bit. Orton already hears voices in his head but now there’s like voodoo magic on him? It’s ridiculous!

Styles pretends to be a zombie and Omos laughs, but Orton walks in. Omos steps in the way but Styles has him stand down. Orton might be missing the joke, “but is there something funny about a grown man having his mind messed with?” Well, maybe not funny. But it is weak. Weak? Yeah. Orton says he and Styles meet in the ring and then we’ll see firsthand how “weak” Orton is. Styles says Orton has problems. Does he need bigger problems? If he does, then Styles accepts. Good. The Viper heads off, but will he show the Phenomenal One he still has some venom in his bite?

Xavier Woods w/ Kofi Kingston VS Shelton Benjamin w/ Cedric Alexander!

The New Day are circling back after those Raw Tag Team Championships! But will their new gear help them be ready for some Mortal Kombat with the Hurt Business? Or will the Gold Standard melt down Sub-Zero Xavier?

Raw returns and the Hurt Business makes their entrance. The bell rings and Woods circles with Benjamin. They tie up, Benjamin puts Woods in the ropes then shoves him right out! Alexander talks trash while Kofi helps Woods up. Woods goes back in, ties up with Benjamin, but Benjamin shoves him again. Woods fires forearms, Benjamin knees low and whips, but Woods gets around to shove Benjamin for a HEEL KICK! Cover, ONE! Woods headlocks but Benjamin hits a BIG back suplex! Benjamin drags Woods up to scoop and SLAM him! Benjamin drags Woods up again to whip him to a corner hard, then scoops him for another SLAM!

Benjamin talks trash to Kofi but Kofi mockingly applauds the “sick moveset.” Benjamin digs a knee into Woods’ back and wraps on a chinlock. Woods endures, Kofi coaches him, and Woods fights up to throw body shots. Benjamin knee slow, scoops again and SLAMS Woods back down! Benjamin looms over Woods, brings him back up and puts him in a corner. Benjamin whips corner to corner, Woods goes up but gets put on the apron. Woods ROCKS Benjamin back, then steps in, only for Benjamin to throat chop him! And KNEE him in the ropes! Woods flops down, Benjamin drags him by his hair for a cover, TWO! Benjamin smirks as he looms over Woods again.

Benjamin sits Woods up and Alexander tells Benjamin to punish Woods! Woods endures, Kofi coaches him and Woods hits a jawbreaker! Woods throws haymakers and CHOPS, and he backs Benjamin down as he goes faster and faster! Benjamin reverses the whip but Woods slides under to ROLLING ELBOW! Benjamin stays up to back suplex but Woods sunset flips, TWO! Woods runs into a BOOT! Alexander says that’s how you do it! Benjamin talks trash to Kofi but Woods catches Benjamin to a cradle, WOODS WINS!

Winner: Xavier Woods, by pinfall

Kofi rubs Woods’ small package in Benjamin’s face, and now the New Day is rolling into that title match! Will the New Day turn it up to 11 tag title reigns?!

Backstage interview with Matt Riddle.

Does Retribution’s number game negatively impact his focus? Riddle says Retribution can play all the tricks they want, they won’t break his focus on Slapjack. But Riddle’s main concern is where to park his scooter. Leaving it in the back got him a ticket, but bringing it ringside means it’ll break. What is Riddle to do? Does Melissa have any ideas? Sorry, no. The New Day walk in and Riddle congratulates them on the win! Do they have time for Call of Duty later? Yeah, just as soon as Riddle jacks that slap! Hit him like blackjack, cook him like Easy Mac, and flip him like a flapjack! OOOH~!

Riddle would, but he’s more of a French Toast guy. Riddle hears Reginald makes great French toast. Are the New Day cool if they invite Reggie along? The New Day isn’t sure, but Riddle asks them to watch the scooter. Heck yeah! Get over here! Secret bro handshake! The Bro heads out, Kofi does some bunny hops, but will the United States Champion slap down Slapjack?

Matt Riddle VS Slapjack w/ Retribution!

Raw returns as Retribution make their entrance. Conspicuous by their absence are the towering T-Bar and massive Mace. Mustafa Ali tells Slapjack to rip into Riddle, because he needs Riddle softened up for next week’s United States Championship match! Will Slapjack do Ali’s bidding?

The bell rings. Riddle catches Slapjack for a gut wrench suplex! Slapjack flounders to a corner, Riddle runs in to forearm smash, then go side to side to forearm again! BROSPLODER! Slapjack avoids the kick, and the moonsault, but not the BROTON! PENALTY KICK hits after all! Slapjack bails out and Ali is furious because Slapjack is embarrassing him! Riddle hops onto the apron and says, “Check this out, bro!” But Slapjack hits Riddle’s bare foot! Slapjack trips Riddle then gives him an APRON BACK SUPLEX! Ali shouts orders at Slapjack and he drags Riddle into the ring. Slapjack stomps Riddle to a corner then fires off kicks! Riddle BOOTS back!

Riddle hops up, Slapjack hits the leg, then hits a SUPER SNAP SUPLEX! Then a HALF HATCH FALCON ARROW! Cover, TWO!! Riddle survives and ALi shouts at Slapjack to stop playing with him! Slapjack drags Riddle up but Riddle fires off haymakers! Riddle runs but into a BIG dropkick! Cover, TWO! Slapjack stomps Riddle, drags him up, and kicks him, then KICKS him! Then KICKS the leg! Slapjack drags Riddle up to a snap suplex, then Ali tells him to “Shut him down!” Slapjack goes up top as Ali instructs, but Riddle intercepts with a forearm! Riddle climbs up to club away, but Slapjack fights back with elbows and a headbutt! Slapjack leaps, into a POWERBOMB!

Riddle flips Slapjack to a FINAL FLASH!! Cover, but Slapjack is in the ropes! Riddle drags Slapjack over, covers, TWO! Slapjack survives and Ali shouts that Ali deserves to be champion! Ali wants Slapjack to show Riddle he isn’t worthy! Riddle lifts, Slapjack slips out of the bomb and KICKS Riddle down! Cover, TWO!! Ali is furious, Slapjack drags Riddle back up, but Riddle slips out of the “Snap Back” to gator roll and ripcord FINAL FLASH!! Gut wrench and BRO DEREK! Cover, Riddle wins!!

Winner: Matt Riddle, by pinfall

Ali is losing his cool at Slapjack losing this match! The Bro is ready, will he be the one shutting down Retribution?

Shane finishes up a phone call backstage.

Pearce then walks in and they talk about the crazy night so far. Between them, is there something Shane wanted to say to Braun? Wow, Shane had no idea everyone was so nosy. Pearce apologizes and says it’s none of his business. Shane thinks that there is something he wants to say to Braun after all. Shane has Pearce go inform Braun to meet him back in the ring, but what is it Shane O’Mac will say to the Monster Among Men?

Raw returns with Shane in the ring.

And as he waits, BRAAAUN makes his return. Braun wants to know what Shane has to say but Shane says he needs a new mic, this one is getting glitchy. Mic check. yes, much better. But Shane is walking around the outside of the ring. Shane says he should get something off his chest and say things face to face. But Shane is slowly backing up. Shane says Braun doesn’t like what’s going on lately and that caused Shane to do some introspection. Did Shane have fun last week? Of course! Shane has fun, relaxes, all in good fun. But Braun should try that, too. Was it at someone else’s expense? Yes, Shane admits to that, but that’s okay. Shane isn’t the only one who thinks like this. There are many people who do! Braun isn’t one of them but that’s okay, too.

Shane sure seems nervous as he tells Braun that there is one thing they need to get done. He just isn’t sure he can talk to Braun about this. Then why did he ask Braun to come out?! Shane says he wants to talk with Braun about other people’s… Well, Shane’s point is that he needs to come to an understanding with Braun. One thing Braun needs to know is… Shane walks back to the ring, takes a few breaths, and Braun gets annoyed. Shane starts walking away as he says he would never, ever make Braun look stupid. Never. But that word “stupid” is an awful word. Braun is pacing and is upset, and frankly, Shane can tell that Braun is upset with him.

Stop playing games, Shane! What’re you doing, trying to puppet him around? Shane would never do that or say that to him, those are disgusting words. Shane would never dare make Braun feel that way. But there are some other words Braun can use, or has perhaps heard. “Stupid is as stupid does.” “You fell out of the stupid tree and hit all the branches on the way down.” Or just plain, “This guy is so darn stupid!” Shane says Braun is like a dinosaur, big body and little brain. BUT, Shane has never or nor would he ever call Braun stupid. Would he, “B-B-B-B-Braun?” Shane runs as Braun loses his cool! Braun has had it with Shane, will he #GetTheseHands on the boss man?

Shane is running and he has his car waiting for him! Braun is a few steps too late and the car peels out of the garage. Will Shane stay away to avoid Braun’s wrath? Wait! Shane didn’t leave in the car! He tricked Braun! And laughs at how “stupid” Braun is.

WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler VS Naomi & Lana!

After breaking nine tables over nine weeks with the Ravishing Russian’s body, the Irresistible Force felt a whole different kind of karma! And now, the #RavisishingGlow are going to turn it up and take the fight to Nia and the Queen of Spades! Will Lana & Naomi take those titles away from the most intimidating duo in the WWE today?

Raw returns as the champions make their entrance, with Reginald?! The introductions are made, and Nia wants us to hold on so Reggie gets a proper intro. He is a sommelier down on his luck after Carmella fired him and Sasha Banks rejected him. Lucky for Reggie, Nia knows her way around a fine glass of wine. He’s her special guest for this match, and isn’t he so cute? The champions go to the ring, the belts are raised, and teams sort out so that Naomi starts with Nia.

Naomi stomps Nia’s foot and throws forearms! Nia shoves Naomi, Lana tags in, and they both go after Nia! Nia blocks the double whip but they double wrench to DOUBLE KICK! Shayna tags in but Lana is right after her. Shayna powers Lana to an open corner and digs her shoulder in. Shayna grinds Lana’s face with forearms but lets off as the ref counts. Lana headscissors to ax kick, then BULLDOGS! Lana kicks Shayna, tags Naomi, then Naomi drops the SPLIT LEG DROP! Naomi RAMS Shayna into the corner, Lana tags back in, but Shayna WRISTLOCK SUPLEXES Naomi! Lana tilt-o-whirls, Naomi joins in, DOUBLE RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Cover, TWO!

Lana keeps Nia at bay then waistlocks Shayna. Shayna throws Lana off and out of the ring hard, and Nia is there. Shayna goes out, Lana sees she’s cornered, but Naomi warns her to move! Lana does, and Naomi hits a TORNILL PLANCHA! The champs go down, the challengers are fired up, and Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again and Lana fires off kicks on Shayna! Lana runs but into a LARIAT! Cover, TWO! Shayna keeps close, and keylocks Lana’s arm. Shayna twists the elbow but Lana fights her way up. Lana hits a jawbreaker and is free, but Shayna just comes back again! Lana throws forearms, reaches for Naomi, but Shayna pushes her away to DECK Naomi! Lana KICKS Shayna, Naomi gets back up, and gets the hot tag! Naomi dropkicks Shayna, Nia tags in but Naomi dodges! REARVIEW for Shayna, then a kick and a springboard ENZIGURI for Nia! Naomi lights Nia up with kicks and another enziguri! Naomi dropkicks the legs out, then SPIKES her with a Rana! Cover, Shayna drags her off!

The ref reprimands Shayna, Naomi elbows her and ROUNDHOUSES Nia! Nia runs in, Naomi sends her into Shayna Naomi runs but Reggie takes a swipe! Lana points that out and Naomi tags her in. Naomi goes out to get Reggie’s hair! Lana ROUNDHOUSES Nia, then baseball slides Reggie! But Nia runs and CLOBBERS them both! Naomi is down, Nia brings Lana up, for the CHOKE BOMB! Cover, Nia & Shayna win!

Winners: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler, by pinfall (still WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions)

Nia carries Reggie away since he did come in handy. Will he be the insurance plan that keeps the gold with Nia and Shayna all the way through WrestleMania?

Backstage interview with Randy Orton.

Clearly he didn’t appreciate what AJ Styles has said, but there are rumors of concern for his well-being. Is Orton supposed to understand there are friends in the locker room? To think so many people were concerned for him. It’s surprisingly, really, as no one has ever said it. It’s almost like Styles thinks the Fiend and Alexa are as problematic for him as they are for Orton. But the only thing Styles has to worry about is being in the ring with Orton and being reintroduced to the most dangerous letters in sports entertainment: R K O.

Backstage interview with Mandy Rose & Dana Brooke.

As we head closer to WrestleMania, have they considered their chances for a title opportunity? Of course they have. Unlike Charlotte Flair in the ring last week, Mandy and Dana haven’t outright declared anything, but that doesn’t mean they’re any less serious. They’ve both worked their butts off, so they shouldn’t be overlooked as a team or as singles competitors. They’re just as ambitious as any other woman on this roster. Speaking of, Charlotte walks in and says they’re right. Charlotte wants to be challenged and wants to challenge for the title.

But Dana says any one of these three could leave it all in the ring at WrestleMania. Charlotte hopes they do. They have five weeks left, so hopefully their bite is as strong as their bark. The Queen has issued a challenge to those wanting to take her shot at the Raw Women’s Championship away, who will step up to it?

Another backstage interview with AJ Styles & Omos.

Surely they heard Orton’s response from earlier, does Styles regret his comments from before? Styles isn’t sure about regret, but he didn’t expect Orton to challenge him to a match. However, that all just proves Styles right. Orton’s going crazy! Styles isn’t to blame for Orton’s brain getting twisted, that’s on Bray Wyatt. Or is it The Fiend? Or Alexa? Who knows. But taking his frustrations out on Styles isn’t how Orton should handle things. That’ll just hurt Orton in the long run, Orton should focus on The Fiend. So Orton will tie up his problems with a nice bow and a big L O S S, and take that into WrestleMania. What are the voices in Orton’s head saying about that? Styles and Omos chuckle then head to the ring!

AJ Styles w/ Omos VS Randy Orton!

The Phenomenal One VS The Viper is guaranteed WrestleMania worthy, because this happened back at WrestleMania 35! But will history repeat itself in phenomenal fashion? Or will a haunted Orton be an even more dangerous Orton than ever before?

Raw returns and Orton makes his entrance. The bell rings and Orton circles with Styles and they tie right up. Orton puts Styles in a corner, the ref wants him to back off but Orton gets a haymaker in! Orton throws more hands and Styles is reeling! Orton bumps Styles off buckle then drag shim around to STOMP the hand! And again! Styles crawls, Orton brings him up to bump off more buckles. Orton DECKS Styles with a EuroUpper! Styles flounders up, but escapes the RKO and bails out! Orton waits on Styles as the ring count climbs, but then goes out at 4 of 10. Orton stalks Styles but Styles hurries back in. Styles stomps Orton as he returns and goes after the arms.

Styles catches his breath, whips Orton to ropes but Orton reverses to elbow Styles down hard! Omos is upset as Orton wrenches Styles to a wristlock then KICKS Styles in the ribs! Orton scrapes his laces off Styles’ face! Orton glances to Omos before he stomps Styles again. Styles bails out but Orton pursues, and they approach commentary. Omos glares but can only watch as Orton back suplexes Styles on the announce desk! The ref starts a ring count, Orton stares down with Omos, but he brings Styles up to put in the ring. Orton gets up but Styles knock shim off the apron! Styles slingshots to forearm Orton down! The Viper is at Omos’ feet as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again and Styles is stomping a mudhole into Orton! Styles lets off and brings Orton up to RAM into him over and over! Styles whips corner to corner, runs in but blocks Orton’s boot! Styles puts the leg on the ropes to KICK it, then he stomps Orton down! The ref backs Styles off, he drags Orton by the leg to DDT the foot! Orton hobbles and flounders, Styles gets the leg and wraps it around the rope for a toehold! The ref counts, Styles lets off at 4, to then straddle attack the leg! Omos is smiling now as Styles drags Orton up by his nose. Styles goes after the leg but Orton throws haymakers. Styles ROCKS Orton back, then backs off as the ref checks Orton.

Orton is okay to continue, so Styles brings Orton up, bumps him off buckles and then claws at his face! The ref reprimands and counts, Styles stops, and Orton kicks back! Orton hobbles after Styles but Styles ENZIGURIS! Orton wobbles, falls over, and Styles sneers as he looms over Orton. Styles drags Orton up by his ear, brings him into a chinlock and squeezes tight like a sleeper hold! Orton endures, reaches for ropes but Styles elbows that shoulder. Orton keeps reaching, Styles elbows the shoulder again. Styles brings Orton away from ropes but Orton gets around to get the ropebreak, but just for a second! Styles brings Orton away again, Orton turns red, but Orton powers Styles into a corner!

The ref counts, Styles lets go and Orton elbows him! Orton catches his breath but Styles throws hands. Orton counter punches, backs Styles down with haymakers, then whips. Styles reverses, Orton kicks but that’s blocked! Styles spins Orton but Orton CLOBBERS Styles! Both men are down, stirring, and Styles rolls while Orton rises. Styles runs in into a POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Orton keeps his cool while he gets to his feet. Orton drags Styles up and reels him in, but Styles slips out of the suplex to kick and CHOP! Styles whips, Orton reverses, back2backbreaker! Cover, TWO! Styles survives, has some blood in the mouth, but Orton is right on him.

Orton punches Styles to the corner, hoists him up top, then throws more haymakers. Orton climbs, glares at Omos and brings Styles up, but Styles fights back! Styles hops down, and trips Orton up! Orton hits buckles on the way down, and Styles slingshots in, but Orton trips that up! Styles falls to the apron and Orton drags him through ropes. But Styles escapes the drape to hook a leg and roll Orton! Orton blocks the Calf Crusher by sitting up, but Styles pulls harder on the leg! Styles completes the CALF CRUSHER!! Orton writhes and endures, reaches out for ropes, but Styles pulls back even harder! Orton moves around, claws over, but Styles drags him away! Orton BOOTS Styles off!

Styles staggers back over, into a EuroUpper! Styles stumbles to the apron, Orton brings him up and in, blows a kiss to Omos before the DRAPING DDT! Styles mocked them, but Orton is hearing those voices in his head! But Omos drags Styles out of the ring to save him! “Oh Randyyy~!” Alexa talks from the titantron! She plays with the jack-in-the-box again and… “Not yet.” Alexa has a box of matches and lights one! She blows it out, and FIRE erupts from the corners!! Orton is startled, and then he spits up the black ink!! Orton doesn’t know what’s going on, but he turns around into a PHENOMENAL FOREARM! Cover, Styles wins!

Winner: AJ Styles, by pinfall

The Viper’s venom is coming back to haunt him, and that costs him against Styles! Orton sputters and Alexa laughs, has the “fun” only just begun?

My Thoughts:

This was a pretty good Raw, but sure seemed like they had to stretch stuff and throw things out there to fill three hours. For one, the stuff with Shane and Braun. I get that Shane is turning Heel by trolling Braun, who in comparison is turning Face, but while the quick, disingenuous apology was good, and then they tease Shane wanting to say more, it felt so awkward for Shane to ask Braun out to the ring, and then just stretch his subtle insults on Braun. I honestly thought Shane was just delaying so that someone could attack Braun, but then it became just awkward. This is of course leading to Shane VS Braun at Mania, I already feel like Shane gets manhandled the entire time until someone helps him cheat and win.

We got a surprise rematch for Lashley VS Miz, which I guess means the “no more automatic rematches” is no longer a thing, despite how adamant “management” was years ago. Lashley of course wins again, but then we get no celebration from The Hurt Business, which was what was advertised! False advertising, Vince!! Though, I suppose McIntyre couldn’t crash the party when he and Sheamus were beating the hell out of each other. That was a really good match, though they really didn’t get that into the No Disqualification. A kendo stick and a chair were the main two weapons, but that was a very creative end with the steel chair ram’s head collision and a referee stoppage. I am thinking these two battle again at Fastlane, maybe Last Man Standing, winner challenges Lashley at Mania.

Turns out I was right about New Day coming back for the Raw Tag Team Championships. For a moment I thought we were going to get a double header, with Kofi VS Cedric happening right after Woods VS Benjamin. Yes, we did see that before, but that should’ve been a reason to do it again, mostly so Kofi could use “GET OVER HERE!” during the match. Maybe that’ll happen next week in the title match. Riddle VS Slapjack was good and Ali’s rage just keeps indicating that he’s getting kicked out of his own group when he for whatever reason loses against Riddle. Both the tag and US title matches are going to make next week’s Raw pretty big.

Speaking of, a bit surprised we got the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships tonight. I thought WWE was building to something big but then the match happened here just because Nia needed to bring Reggie with her. And then Reggie ended up being why the champions won, so between Pearce on NXT last week and Reggie here, the champions are starting to fall apart. Despite what is out there online, I hope NXT’s announcement isn’t that NXT is just getting their own tag titles, even if they have way more women and women tag teams than Raw & SmackDown. But in the end, it might be the only way to again show Vince how it’s done.

Charlotte had a decent promo segment with Dana & Mandy. While Asuka is still shoot getting over the tooth getting kicked out of her mouth, I hope we get a good couple of contenders matches with Mandy, Dana and Charlotte in some combination, maybe even throw Peyton Royce in there somewhere since she can’t tag with Lacey Evans right now. Maybe Fastlane is where THE #1 contender’s match happens, and it’ll surely be Charlotte, so that she and Asuka can battle at Mania as a full rematch from when Charlotte ended Asuka’s undefeated streak. That’d be the best for both of them, and best overall if Asuka won.

Orton VS Styles and everything leading to it tonight was pretty good, too. Styles mocking the supernatural aspects of Orton’s story make me hope Styles ends up being the next target for The Fiend after this story with Orton wraps. And naturally, Alexa is why Orton lost here, with the great tease of the jack-in-the-box and then making Orton spit up the black goo. I almost made a joke about Kane showing up because of the pyro from the posts. I’m very intrigued what the jack-in-the-box itself looks like when it finally pops out. Maybe it’ll be a snake because Orton is the Viper.

My Score: 8.1/10