Andrew’s IMPACT Results & Match Ratings: 2.24.2022

No Surrender shook things up nicely! How does IMPACT capitalize on the new information?

Moose had a great match with W. Morrissey, Honor No More got to stick around thanks to Eddie Edwards betraying Team Impact and Jay White decided it was time to kick G.o.D. out of the Bullet Club.

Those are just the main headlines, so we’ve got some other stories to flesh out and not a lot of time! Apparently in 9 days there will be the Sacrifice ImpactPlus event! So where do things go with such a tight turn around?

Business relationship no more! #IMPACTonAXSTV pic.twitter.com/QMky7GohLP

— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) February 25, 2022

Ratings:

• Digital Media Championship: dotCombat Match: Matt Cardona (c) vs Jordynne Grace: Cardona retains via Rope Assisted Stack – ** ½
• John Skyler vs Bhupinder Gujjar: Gujjar wins via Second Rope Spear – ** ¼
• Champ/Champ Challenge: Deonna Purrazzo (c) vs Lady Frost: Deonna retains via Venus de Mila – **
• Zicky Dice vs Jonah: Jonah wins via Liger Bomb – SQUASH
• Honor No More (OGK & Kenny King) w/ Maria, PCO & Vincent vs Rich Swann, Willie Mack and Chris Sabin w/Rhino & Heath: OGK wins via Proton Pack – ***

Results:

We open with the Eddie Edwards betrayal video recap, and then Moose comes down to the ring to officially open the show after his slobberknocker with Massive Cassidy at No Surrender!

Moose makes the usual boastful style of promo, gives himself credit for sending Josh Alexander packing, Cardona cheating and Eddie Edwards down the path of betrayal; but HEATH’s music hits and he comes out to make his presence felt. Exchange of words, Heath blames covid protocols for why he’s been missing for a while, and then a small scuffle that Heath gets the best of.

Digital Media Championship: No DQ Match: Matt Cardona (c) vs Jordynne Grace

Jordynne was pushed during her rematch at No Surrender and that forced her hand to go for the Low Blow and get disqualified. So she’s given another shot, this time in a No DQ match. Jordynne comes in with a DVD player. Jordynne beats on Cardona, finds a trash can filled with keyboards and other assortments of digital device items, but Cardona finally gets an opening.

Cardona becomes a literal Keyboard Warrior when he cracks Jordynne over the back with it and then starts choking her with the chord to a laptop power supply. After a few near falls, Jordynne manages to catch Cardona and hit him with a sudden flurry. Sliding Elbow into the corner, Vader Bomb for a 2, then she goes to the bag under the ring and dumps out a bag of cellphones. Jordynne Powersombs Carodna onto the cellphones, sets a chair in the corner, goes for something but Jordynne tries the Low Blow again. Cardona shows the cup, then tries to smother Jordynne with his Socko Cup snuff attack, but Jordynne turns it around on him. Then goes for the Grace Driver, but Cardona tosses her into the chair and stacks her up using the ropes for leverage and retains.

The Iinspiration and The Influence ran into each other in the back and had words about thier IMPACT Knockouts Tag Team Championship match at #Sacrifice!@TenilleDashwood @MadisonRayne @JessicaMcKay @CassieLee @kalebKonley #IMPACTonAXSTV pic.twitter.com/lHJZAL9FG4

— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) February 25, 2022

John Skyler vs Bhupinder Gujjar

Brian Myers gets his own “Professional Commentator” table. So this could be fun since Myers is a great addition to Rehwoldt and Hannifan, plus Skyler and Gujjar needs some extra spark to keep people invested. Skyler tries to start quick but Gujjar quickly turns things around with a Flying Uppercut, Dropkick and Backbody Drop. As Gujjar tries to set up for a rope move, Skyler rolls away, baits Gujjar in and uses the old shortcut trip into the lower turnbuckle to make it seem like he has a chance.

Gujjar fires up, halfway hits a Slingblade I could call a Scimitar, Ripcord Knee, Spinebuster and Gujjar gets the near fall. Skyler fights back, tries to drive Gujjar up into the turnbuckles which plays into Gujjar’s middle rope Spear, and it ends just that way.

Massive Cassidy comes out after the match to attack Myers. But Skyler gets in the way, then must feel disrespected and actually saves Myers from death, but eats the BQE through the table himself.

Champ/Champ Challenge: Deonna Purrazzo (c) vs Lady Frost

Lady Frost chooses the… Reina de Reinas title. About time since the first two picked the ROH title.

This match mostly goes how we expected, Frost hits a few solid strikes for openings but Deonna is slowly picking apart limbs. Deonna works over the knee to try and weaken the gymnastic inspired offense, but Frost keeps fighting through the pain. She gets on the Apron and kicks her leg for momentum to pull off what I’d like to call a Windmill Backflip.

Frost keeps trying to fight through the pain and hit her offense but her moving slower and Deonna continuing to go after the knee eventually catches up to Frost. Deonna wrestles her down, Fujiwara into Venus de Milo, and Deonna retains.  Gisele Shaw does saunter out as Deonna is exiting, but she doesn’t pay much attention to Deonna and goes right to Lady Frost literally just to pose and show off in the spotlights.

Zicky Dice vs Jonah

Okay so Zicky gets murdered. I’m writing this while Jonah walks to the ring, but it’s written in purple crayon. So let us not be surprised when it happens.

Honor No More (OGK & Kenny King) w/ Maria, PCO & Vincent vs Rich Swann, Willie Mack and Chris Sabin w/Rhino & Heath

This was a fast paced and frantic match. Early on we saw the Japanese inspired corner locomotion attacks from both teams, quick wipe out attacks, tandem maneuvers and just a lot of fun action. The match ends with Honor No More going over of course, but it was a fun match to lead towards Eddie’s explanation.

Eddie’s explanation is like listening to a mush mouthed Bret Hart in conspiracy theorist mode. Some kind of batshit concept about exposing Dishonor in the business. This is rambling and pretty awful not gonna lie. Eddie should never close a show with talking, for being in the business for over 15 years he still hasn’t learned how to cut a promo. This really feels like a shitty Bret Hart cosplay of how it was everyone elses fault and not his.

Oh God, Alisha comes out, and even though I don’t care for her wrestling…she actually saves the promo a little. She calls Eddie a whiny bitch and it’s not a terrible way to punctuate the segment. Still sucked because Eddie is an awful promo, but I never thought I’d find a segment that Lish bolstered.

Overall Score: 5.5/10

This prattling promo at the end really tanked the show. The wrestling content was mediocre at best, the segments felt a little short and rushed; probably because Sacrifice is in 9 days so it’s not a very long time to try and make sense of the matches for that card. Eddie’s lack of promo ability took a lot of wind out of the sails of this Honor No More angle, and the only interesting thing is really Bullet Club versus VBD & GoD. PCO and Jonah got announced for Sacrifice, so that could be an interesting match. IInspiration and The Influence is comically entertaining, but the matches won’t be worth much and will probably just be Kaleb turning on The Influence for IInspiration.

So hopefully with the announcement of Jay White vs Alex Shelley at Sacrifice, we can see MCMG return. Maybe we get the American Wolves back and Eddie never has to talk again. I mean Christ on bike, Honor No More has Maria, Bennet, Kenny King and Taven….let them do all the talking. Sufficed to say, even coming off a fairly eventful PPV, this IMPACT missed the mark worse than Eagly trying to put a helmet on a barn.