Fallout from Wrestling Is Life!

Wrestling Is Life, and part of that life is you win some, you lose some. We hear from the stars of HPW in the aftermath of this new June event!

After the HPW Death Mountain Championship Open Challenge.

Ganon & Cia find Ghirahim backstage.

The Gerudo asks The Living Blade, “What happened? I thought you were gonna challenge Thunderbird!” Ghirahim says he was. Didn’t they see what happened back here? No, what did happen? Ghirahim says it was a mad dash, several dozen wrestlers trying to reach gorilla, but he was pulling ahead because of his great parkour skills. Ganon knows about that, right? He’s seen Ghirahim do the leaps and the kongs. Ganon has no idea what he’s talking about. Well, anyway, Ghirahim was just feet away, and then WHAM! Something hit him from the side and sent him flying into road cases! It was… It was HER!

Ghirahim points at Tali of the Gerudo Sisterhood! Ganon asks if that’s true. Tali shrugs and says yeah. Though a lot of good it did her, she still missed out on the match. Ghirahim says serves her right for getting in his way! And he warns her it better not happen again. Oh? And what’s he gonna do about it? Tali and Ghirahim stare down, but Cia says now’s not the time for that. For one, she has her match next. Tali chuckles and says Ghirahim’s lucky “Mommy” was here. Tali leaves, Ghirahim seethes, but The Dark Forces head out. Will the Dame of the Dunes scale Death Mountain again in the near future?

After the HPW Goddess Championship match.

Cia returns backstage.

We know that the Dark Sorceress did not win the title off Ruto, and she is in a foul mood. She kicks a trash can and keeps shouting, “Dammit! Dammit, dammit, dammit!” Cia shrieks and storms off. Well, we know her mood won’t improve with the next match…

Ruto returns backstage.

The Arrow Club applauds as the Zora Princess returns victorious. Ruto thanks them for their praises, but it was never in doubt that she would win. “Now, you boys better do your part out there.” Fin says of course. By the end of tonight, the Arrow Club will be golden. Arrow Club all has confident smiles on their faces as they head back to the locker rooms.

After the HPW World Trios Championships match.

The Dark Forces regroups.

Ganon is there as Volga, Zant & Wizzro return. He is clearly disappointed by their loss. “Seriously? Didn’t you guys win Blood & Thunder? How did you lose here?” Volga says Zant kept doing his own thing instead of sticking to the game plan! Zant says he was just calling audibles based on what he was seeing. He needed to call an audible when Volga was going for a Frog Splash? Ganon tells them to stop arguing, and says they clearly need to figure some things out, maybe make some changes. Ganon leads the group away, what changes could he mean?

Arrow Club regroups.

Ruto, Torbevito & Scaly applaud as Fin Balure & The Young Ducks return triumphant. Fin says, “What’d I tell ya?” Ruto says yes, he was right. And also, their “gift” is ready. Ooh~! Alright then, they’ll make sure to talk to you-know-who when the time is right. Torbevito says, “His name’s Yu-no-bo, dude.” Fin sighs and says he knows that, Torb, he was trying to keep it on the downlow. Oh…! Fin ushers Arrow Club out of gorilla position and back to the locker rooms.

After the Million Rupee Championship match.

The Dark Forces regroups, again.

Kevin Gibdo returns with the title belt, and Ganon says, “Finally, something to celebrate! Good on ya, Evan.” It’s Kevin. Whatever! Point is, they can call him champion now! Ganon pats Kevin on the back, but Zant points out it took “the rest of us” to help Kevin since the uWo showed up. “Rest of us?” Volga repeats. “Where were you out there?” Ganon has them stop arguing again, but he does agree that Zant’s one to talk. Just focus on the positives. Things are looking up for the group, they’re gonna keep this going through the Summer. But then MAJORA JUMPS IN!? And he goes right after Ganon!!

The Dark Forces tries to stop Majora but he fires off on all of them! Ganon BOOTS back, Majora staggers into the cameraman, and then Ganon shoves Majora at the table! Ganon fires off hands and beats Majora down on top of the water bottles! Referees and producers rush in, they get Ganon to back off, and he warns Majora to watch himself. The refs tell Ganon to get outta here, and he says fine, he’s leaving! But then TORPEDO MAJORA!! Ganon goes down in a heap against Volga and Wizzro! Majora says Ganon better watch himself! Majora storms off, is he going to terminate the HPW Termina Champion?

After the HPW Triforce World Championship Steel Cage match.

Arrow Club returns backstage.

All of them are upset, and Rick asks what “those marks” were doing running out there to attack them. Mack says, “The Studly Don’t Quit? More like The Studly Don’t Think! The Studly Don’t Know What They’ve Gotten Themselves Into!” Torbevito says that’s a lot of letters for a team name. Mack says, “Shut up, Torb!” Then Yunobo storms in, and he pushes past Arrow Club to get right in front of the camera! “LINK! You can o’ green beans with legs! You think you proved anything by jumpin’ off the top of a cage?! You only proved you’re not afraid o’ HEIGHTS! Yeah! You thought you bled tonight, you thought you survived? DIG IT!

“You may feel good right now, but later on, you’re gonna WISH that you hadn’t made it through the night, YEAH! Do you know who yer messin’ with? Yer messin’ with ME! The Macho Goro, Yunobo! GOODBYE!” Yunobo storms off and the Arrow Club is in awe. Torbevito is ecstatic as he says “It’s working! It’s totally working!” Ruto gives him a smack on the shoulder and says, “Shh, Torb, shh!” Fin says, “Now that guy is gonna be a champion!” Arrow Club follows after “The Macho Goro,” will this savage new attitude help him steamroll through the HPW roster?

My Thoughts:

OOOOH YEAH, time to finally reference one of the true greats. I doubt I’ll really capture the “it factor” of Randy Savage but I’d be remised if I didn’t try. Also, I needed to set up something for the Termina Championship so there, Majora just goes after Ganon because he’s crazy and unpredictable and also Majora threatened to destroy Termina in the Zelda games so it was only a matter of time. Pun not intended.