Entertainment

Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News Report! (12/29/24)

Ganon talks with his Dark Forces…

Published

4 weeks ago

December 29, 2024

Steven Mitchell

The Gerudo Ace wants WORLD DOMINATION!

Before HyruleMania 5, Ganon talks with the Dark Forces AND Faces of Evil to get them all working together towards the HPW World Trios Championships!

The Dark Forces meet at Ganon’s lair.

Cia leads the way as she, Volga, Wizzro & Kevin Gibdo walk into the upstairs lounge, just as they did way back in March. Zant and Ghirahim are already there with Ganon, as are The Faces of Evil. Ganon says, “About time you got here!” Cia says, “About time you explained what’s going on here. Why’re we working with these idiots?” “These idiots,” Ganon says, “were smart enough to see reason. I’m about to be HPW Triforce World Champion again, so they want to be on the right side of history.” And…? Cia still doesn’t see the need for them to be hanging around. Ganon says that’s because she’s not seeing the bigger picture.

Ganon stands up and motions in the air for her to “see” it. Arrow Club still need challengers for their Trios titles, right? Yes… And the Dark Forces were taking notes like he told them to, right? Um, mostly… Then share those notes with The Faces of Evil. They can all go after Arrow Club together, doubling their chances of taking the titles. “Seriously? These goobers just get to copy off our homework?” Ganon wants Cia to calm down but Cia says no, the Dark Forces can handle this on their own. Can they, though…? Yes, they can. Can they…? Cia doesn’t appreciate Ganon trying to down play the team.

Ganon apologizes, “but… It has been awhile since Volga’s held a title. It was back when Kevin and ReDead were teamed with him, right? And, well, Kevin’s Million Rupee Champion now.” Volga gets upset at what Ganon’s implying. Ganon asks if Volga’s mad. Is he mad? Is he pissed off? Yeah? GOOD! Use that to take those titles from Arrow Club! Volga is a bit confused, but Ganon says HyruleMania 5 is going to be the best one yet, because they will come out on top! Death Mountain Championship, Million Rupee Championship, Trios Championships, Cia could’ve been fighting for the Goddess Champion, and Ganon will get the Triforce Championship!

Cia is also confused and upset, but Ganon brushes that aside by saying, “Let’s drink up!” Zant cheers alongside the others, but will things really work out for the combined forces of The Dark Forces and Faces of Evil?

My Thoughts:

Sorry for getting this one out late but there’s just been so much wrestling for December so I haven’t had as much time to spare. I’m kinda just throwing this together while I’m working on HyruleMania 5, and now I’ll have to throw together the other “Dawn of the X Day” articles after this.

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