Time to pin the blame!

After they both lost their first match in Evolve, Dani Palmer and Kali Armstrong look to settle who really lost it for them by going 1v1 with each other!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

• Riley Osborne VS Javier Bernal; Riley wins.
• Drako Knox VS Bryce Donovan; changed to…
• 8 Man Tag: Drako Knox, Ice Williams, Cappuccino Jones & Jack Cartwheel VS Bryce Donovan, Jackson Drake & Swipe Right w/ Zayda Steel; Donovan, Drake & Swipe Right win.
• Dani Palmer VS Kali Armstrong; Kali wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Swipe Right arrives.

Brad Baylor & Ricky Smokes both go, “Bro!” Brad says they totally proved to the WWE Universe what they’re all about! Ricky says that’s Fo Sho Hundo! Though, they did lose… But they proved to the NXT Tag Team Champions, arguably the BEST tag team in the world, that they have big competition coming up. BIG hundos, bro bro! Swipe Right took the L, but they showed resilience, and they’ve proved to all of Evolve that Swipe Right is gonna be a problem. Facts! But will Swipe Right keep their egos in check so they can get those W’s?

Riley Osborne VS Javier Bernal!

Speaking of W’s, both men in this match could use that W to stay afloat. Will the Daredevil finally bring out some of that #TurboTerry that got him here? Or will tonight belong to Big Body Javi?

The bell rings and the two tie up. Riley wrenches but Javi rolls, then headscissors. Riley kips up but Javi wrenches to wristlock. Riley rolls, cartwheels, handsprings, wrenches and wristlocks back. The fans rally, Javi puts Riley in a corner, and Javi whips. Riley reverses but Javi goes up and up and FLYING ARM-DRAGS! Javi keeps moving, ducks ‘n’ dodges, then tilt-o-whirls! Riley ends up on ropes, Javi goes to the apron! Riley avoids the superkick to SHOVE Javi down! Riley builds speed, but Javi moves aside. Riley goes to the apron, avoids the sweep and mule kicks! But Javi avoids the Asai Moonsault!

Javi knees Riley, whips him at the ring, but Riley tiger feint kicks from the apron! Riley puts Javi in, then somersaults and jumps up to RANA! Cover, TWO! Javi escapes, but Riley LARIATS! The fans fire up for Riley as he drops a knee on Javi’s face! Riley then drags Javi up, UPPERCUTS him down, then brings him up. The fans rally and duel while Riley drags Javi up again. Javi fires a body shot, but Riley DECKS Javi! Riley drags Javi up again, scoops and SLAMS, then sets up to STANDING MOONSAULT, but onto knees! The fans rally, Javi and Riley stagger up, and Javi runs in. Riley BOOTS Javi down, then goes up!

Riley aims and SHOOTING- NO, Javi dodges, Riley rolls through, and Javi hits a RUNNING DDT! Both men are down and the fans fire up! Javi and Riley rise up, and Riley swings! Javi blocks to ROCK Riley! And again! And again! And again! Javi whips, Riley reverses, but Javi CLOBBERS him! And CLOBBERS him again! Javi hits a KNEE SMASH, then a SUPERKICK! Javi roars and the fans fire up! Javi drags Riley up, underhooks, BUTTERFLY SUPLEX! Cover, TWO! Riley stays in this and Javi can’t believe it! Javi is already despairing, but he drags Riley up> Javi full nelsons, but Riley victory rolls, TWO!

Riley SUPERKICKS Javi now! The fans fire up, Riley runs in, but Javi puts him on the apron. Riley ROCKS Javi, climbs again, but Javi ROCKS Riley. Javi climbs up, CLUBS Riley, but Riley fires elbows. Javi falls, Riley aims, SHOOTING STAR! Cover, Riley wins!

Winner: Riley Osborne, by pinfall

The #StarStream takes down Big Body Javi, meaning Riley is finally on a winning track. Will Riley finally have success he can call all his own? As for Javi, Chuey Martinez is here to interview him on the way out. Chuey makes sure Javi doesn’t forget his jacket. Javi thanks Chuey, but then he drops the jacket. Is Big Body Javi’s heart just not in it?

Haze Jameson is in the VIP Section!

She may have lost alongside the mysterious masked Kalyx last week, but she’s making herself feel better with a bit of that bubbly.

Drako Knox VS Bryce Donovan!

Hard Knox was upset in his Evolve debut over not just losing, but over his tag partner and friend, Tate Wilder, going down with injury. And it didn’t help that Swipe Right was trolling them from the VIP Section, or that Bryce was acting as the bouncer. Will Knox take out that frustration on Bryce here tonight? Or will he be unable to solve The Paradox?

Wait, speaking of Swipe Right, not only do they walk out here, but they’ve got Zayda Steel & Jackson Drake with them. They’re all taunting Knox and he asks what this is even about. They claim Bryce is on their team, duh. Knox is wary of Swipe Right and the party flanking the ring. They all slip into the ring, but then here come reinforcements for Knox! Cappuccino Jones, Jack Cartwheel & Ice Williams step to Drake & Swipe Right! Here comes Stevie Turner! The Evolve General Manager says whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold on now! She has an idea how to handle this. How about a tag match? Not just a tag match, but an 8 MAN TAG?

The fans like that, the eight superstars like that, so Stevie says it is official! This Evolve opener just escalated quickly, but who will come out the winning side?

8 Man Tag: Drako Knox, Ice Williams, Cappuccino Jones & Jack Cartwheel VS Bryce Donovan, Jackson Drake & Swipe Right w/ Zayda Steel!

The teams sort out, and Bryce wants to start, but the Carolina Reaper insists. He steps to Knox, which is fine by Knox. The bell rings, the fans rally for Knox’s side, but Drake shoves him. Knox shoves back! They tie up, go around, and Drake waistlocks. Knox switches, headlocks, but Drake pries at the hold. Knox clamps on tighter, but Drake fires body shots. Drake powers up and out, but Knox runs him over! The fans fire up with Knox but Drake trips him. Knox kicks Drake away, then arm-drags him down! Knox has the armlock but Drake fights around. Drake rises up, reaches out, but Knox keeps him from his team.

Drake pulls Knox’s bear and puts Knox in a corner! The ref reprimands, but Drake lets go to CHOP! Drake stomps Knox, ROCKS him, then whips Knox into the corner! Knox staggers forward, but he blocks a hip toss to LARIAT! The fans fire up for Knox and he drags Drake into a headlock. Knox calls to his corner, Cappuccino tags in. Jones wrenches and CLUBS Drake’s arm, then wrenches again. Drake rolls, waistlocks, and he ROCKS Jones! Jones ROCKS Drake, Drake ROCKS Jones, repeat! The fans rally, Jones ROCKS Drake and CLUBS him on the back. Drake kicks in return, then fireman’s carries.

Jones fights free, shoves Drake to ropes, but Drake hurdles! Jones hurdles, hurdles again, then DROPKICKS Drake down! The fans fire up, Jones covers, TWO! Drake scrambles away, tag to Smokes! Jones dodges Smokes, dodges again, then hits an atomic drop! And a LARIAT! Cover, ONE, but Jones clamps onto Smokes’ arm. Jones fights up, smothers Jones, but Cartwheel tags in! Jones scoops Smokes for a BACKBREAKER, and Jack slingshots to ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Jack keeps Smokes from his corner with an armlock, but Smokes fires body shots. Smokes CLUBS Jack, whips him to ropes, but Jack cartwheels over!

Jack HIP TOSSES, cartwheels, but Smokes avoids the Penalty Kick! STANDING MARIPOSA! Cover, TWO! Jack clamps on with a chinlock, but Smokes fights up to pull hair. Smokes puts Jack on ropes, Bryce tags in, then Smokes powers out. Jack comes back, Smokes drops down and Bryce CLOBBERS Jack! The fans fire up and even Smokes is surprised. Bryce CLUBS away on Jack’s back, then scoops Jack to SLAM him, and ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Bryce drags Jack up, Brad wants a tag, so Bryce tags him in. They mug Jack, the fans boo, but Zayda’s having fun watching as Brad CHOPS Jack and fires hands.

Brad CLUBS Jack, but Jack fires body shots. They scrap, Brad UPPERCUTS then fires more hands. Jack CHOPS, Brad CHOPS, and Brad fires more hands. Brad CHOPS Jack, then fireman’s carries. Jack fires elbows to get free, but Brad shoves to kitchen sink knee! Brad says “Swipe Right!” but fans chant “Swipe Left!” Jack stands, and he CHOPS! Brad CHOPS! Jack CHOPS! The CHOPS keep going, and Jack fires a flurry! Brad keeps Jack from his corner, then short arm LARIATS! The fans boo but then Brad sucker punches Knox & Ice! But Jack DUMPS Brad out! The fans fire up, Smokes & Drake storm in, but Ice & Knox CLOBBER them!

Knox sends Jones in and he BLASTS Bryce off the apron! Knox has the team regroup, and Jack gets a sip of Cappuccino’s cappuccino! Jack is feeling jacked up! FOSBURY FLOP onto Drake & Swipe Right! The fans fire up while Evolve goes to break.

Evolve returns as Ice arm-drags Smokes! And UPPERCUTS him! Ice brings Smokes around to bump off buckles, then he tags in Knox. Knox scoops Smokes, Ice tags back in. Knox SLAMS Smokes, Ice slingshots for the ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Ice keeps Smokes from his corner, UPPERCUTS him, then whips him corner to corner. Smokes reverses, runs up, but Ice BOOTS him away! But Smokes sucker punches Jack! The ref is busy with Smokes, as well as Knox and team, but that lets Bryce CLOBBER Ice from behind! Smokes then bumps Ice off buckles, tags in Brad, and Smokes sends Brand into RAM Ice! Brad feeds Ice to Smokes’ BOOT! Cover, WTO!

Brad clamps onto Ice with a facelock then CLUBS him down! Zayda talks trash, Brad UPPERCUTS Ice, then taunts him. Brad CLUBS Ice again, then drags him over to tag Drake. Drake kicks Ice down, then drags him up to facelock. Drake CLAWS Ice’s back, then KNEES him, and wrenches for a RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Cover, TWO! Drake stays between Ice and his corner, then KICKS Ice in the back. Drake pushes Ice to the ropes, then springboard knee drops! The fans boo but Drake drags Ice up. Ice fires body shots, then he CHOPS! Drake blocks a kick to CHOP! Then he reels Ice in, for a POWERBOMB! High stack, TWO!

Drake floats over, tags Smokes, and they stomp Ice. Smokes smothers Ice, rains down fists, then lets off to soak up the heat. Smokes drags Ice up, suplexes, but Ice fights that! Ice spins things around to BACKDROP free! The fans fire up, but Smokes tags Bryce! Bryce THROWS Ice away, then gets under him to FLAPJACK! Then he ELBOWS Ice down! Bryce drags Ice up, tags Brad, and they mug Ice. The fans boo but Brad CHOPS Ice! Brad snapmares Ice, KNEES him in the back again and again, but Zayda tells the fans to stop booing, Brad is winning! Cover, TWO! Brad clamps a chinlock onto Ice but Ice endures.

The fans rally, Ice fights around, then fights up to his feet. Ice fires body shots, reaches out, but Brad keeps him back! Ice fires haymakers, reaches out, repeat! Brad KNEES Ice low! Brad whips, Ice reverses and ENZIGIRIS! Brad tags Smokes, Smokes runs to BLAST Cappuccino & Cartwheel! Smokes goes back to Ice, ducks a haymaker, but so does Ice. Smokes ducks another haymaker but Ice spins through to LARIAT! The fans fire up while both men crawl, hot tags to Drake and Knox! The fans fire up as Knox rallies on Drake with big forearms! Then an ELBOW for Smokes! Knox roars, clinches Smokes to spin him around and suplex!

The fans fire up as Knox LARIATS Drake in the corner! Scoop and OKLAHOMA STAMPEDE! Cover, TWO!! Zayda cheers but the fans boo. Knox tags Jones, they mug Drake, then Jones hits a back suplex! Drake lands out, tag to Brad! Jack tags in, Jones catches Brad, CARTWHEEL SUPERKICK HALF ‘N’ HALF COMBO!! Cover, Bryce breaks it! Bryce then grabs Jones, but Jack kicks Bryce! Jones hits a CODE BFRAEKER! Knox is in, he dodges Bryce to BOOT him down! Cappuccino & Cartwheel get Brad up, but Zayda distracts the ref! Smokes slides in and TOSSES Jones out! Brad wrenches Jack, holds him up, DROPKICK SPINEBUSTER COMBO! Cover, ICE BREAKS IT!

The fans fire up as Ice saves  his team! But Smokes SLINGSHOT SPEARS Ice! Knox gets Smokes for the REDBONE PLEX! Knox kips up, but Drake handsprings, LETHAL INJECTION! Jones kicks Drake for the OVERDRIVE! Brad kicks Jones and hits the SILENCER! Brad has Jack now, suplexes, but Jack cradles through, TWO!! Brad escapes, but Jack cartwheels to dodge, JUMP NECKBREAKER! Zayda panics while Jack fireman’s carries! DEATH VALLEY CARTWHEEL! Jack goes up, SHOOTING- NO, Brad dodges! Jack rolls through the Shooting Star but Bryce tags in! Jack comes back, into the BLACK HOLE SLAM!! Cover, Bryce’s team wins!

Winners: Bryce Donovan, Jackson Drake & Swipe Right, by pinfall

Zayda celebrates with her guys, and it was certainly a team effort to get this win. Will they all be partying in Orlando tonight?

Chuey Martinez is here to interview the winning side, and asks what the association is here. Smokes mocks Chuey and tells him to shut up. The fans boo and Chuey says if they’re not going to answer the questions, then the fans know what to do. “SWIPE LEFT! SWIPE LEFT!” Brad asks what that smell is, and they all mock Chuey. Chuey says no, that’s just the dirt on Brad’s own upper lip. The fans continue to “SWIPE LEFT! SWIPE LEFT!” at the immaturity, but wait! Sean Legacy storms in! This ain’t what the WWE ID or Evolve is about! They’re all a bunch of punk kids. Whoa, Super Sean ain’t alone, cuz TIMOTHY THATCHER is here!

Swipe Right and friends talk smack, but are they barking up the wrong tree?

Dani Palmer VS Kali Armstrong!

The very first match of the very first episode of WWE Evolve was a good one, just not a victorious one for these two. And while one says teams share the wins and the losses, the other says the blame is pinned on the one who took the pin. Will the Bluegrass Badass just have to show the Ironwoman of Inglewood isn’t all she’s cracked up to be? Or will Kali prove she ain’t a loser, #StraightLikeThat?

The big fight introductions are made, and the bell rings. The two circle, tie up, and Kali powers Dani back. Dani slips around to waistlock then headlock. Kali powers up and throws Dani away! The fans rally and duel as the two reset. Kali and Dani circle, Dani goes for a leg, but Kali blocks that. Kali brings Dani up, wrenches to a wristlock, but Dani fights the hold. Dani rolls, backflips, then arm-drags to put Kali in an armlock. Kali endures, fights around, but Dani shows she has the technical superiority. The fans rally, Kali reaches up to headscissor, and she brings Dani down. Kali squeezes tight, but Dani moves around.

Dani headstands, then sits on a cover! TWO, but Dani handsprings through to come back and jackknife bridge! TWO, and Dani SPLASHES! Cover, TWO! Dani keeps Kali down with an armlock! Dani wants the Fujiwara Armbar but Kali powers up to her feet. Dani wrenches, YANKS the arm, then wrenches and YANKS again. Dani wrenches but Kali ROCKS her! Dani ROCKS Kali! Dani runs, but into a FLAPJACK, but Dani lands out on her feet! Kali CLOBBERS Dani and Dani tumbles out of the ring! Kali drags Dani up by her hair, but Dani RAMS into Kali! Dani slingshots up and over, keeps moving, but runs into a military press!

The fans fire up, but Dani slips free to SHOTGUN Kali! Dani kips up, then Dani brings Kali around to TOSS out of the ring! Dani goes up the corner, flashbacks to the Evolve premiere! But Kali slips into the ring, runs up tot he corner, and springs right up to SUPER BELLY2BELLY! The fans fire up for Kali as CLUBS away on Dani. Kali talks trash, then drags Dani up. Kali whips Dani to a corner hard, then scowls as she storms over. Kali talks trash, brings Dani up for a BIG back suplex! Kali snarls, looks to the camera, “You thought I was playing? I said I was different! And now I’ma show you!” Kali CLUBS Dani, #StraightLikeThat.

Kali looms over Dani while the fans rally, and Evolve goes to break.

Evolve returns and Kali has Dani down in a chinlock. Dani endures, fights up, and JAWBREAKERS free! Kali staggers, Dani runs up, but Kali JAWBREAKERS in return! Both women stagger, and they DOUBLE LARIAT! Both women flounder to corners, then they both shriek! They both run in and DOUBLE CROSSBODY!! The fans fire up for that bit of demolition derby! Kali and Dani slowly rise up, and Kali fires a forearm! Dani fires one back! Kali grabs Dani by the hair and fires another forearm! Dani fires another forearm! Then she fires counter punches! Dani CHOPS, CHOPS, and CHOPS! Dani whips, Kali reverses, but Dani FLYING SHOULDER TACKLES!

Dani rallies on Kali, then CHOPS, KICKS, and ENZIGIRIS! Kali flounders to a corner, Dani runs up, jump and DOUBLE KNEE to the back! Dani pushes Kali to the drop zone, then she climbs up. Kali stands, but into a METEORA! Cover, TWO! Kali stays in this but Dani stays on her. Dani cravats, but Kali says no to Sliced Bread! Dani ducks ‘n’ dodges, but runs into a POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Dani survives and Kali is frustrated. The fans rally, Kali reels Dani in and back suplexes, but Dani lands out! Dani shoves Kali to a corner, runs up, but ducks a back elbow! Dani BOOTS Kali down, then hurries up top!

But Kali’s up after Dani again! Dani holds onto the ropes, then HEADSBUTTS Kali down! The fans fire up and Dani hits the FIVE STAR FROG FLOP!! Kali avoids the splash, then builds speed! KALI KONNECTION!! Cover, Kali wins!

Winner: Kali Armstrong, by pinfall

All gas, no brakes, and Kali breaks through with her second singles win! Kali grabs the mic to say, “I told y’all, I’m different! And I’m calling out all y’all chicks in the locker room! I ain’t duckin’ none of y’all! All y’all can get it! But I’m out here to tell y’all that I’m about to make history by being the first ever Evolve Champion! And ain’t nothing none of y’all can do about it!” The fans like that, but Chantel Monroe is in the VIP Section and takes offense. Kali tells Chantel she’s LAST in line! Ouch. Kendal Grey comes out and Kali says she’s barely in front Chantel! Brinley Reece also walks out here, Kali says Brin has some nerve. She’s third to last, stepping to Kali!

But y’know what? Kali is happy all y’all are out here, so she can say this to their face. Kali’s built different! Will no one stop “The Omega” from being the first WWE Evolve Women’s Champion?

My Thoughts:

A very good Evolve, and though it technically only had three matches, it all flowed so well. Quite the bait ‘n’ switch on Knox VS Donovan becoming an 8 Man Tag, but what a great 8 Man Tag! Clearly Evolve has its first faction already with Swipe Right bringing Zayda, Drake and even Donovan along, and they could probably call themselves “The VIPs” or something similar since they all think so highly of themselves. Their promo with Chuey was a bit cheesy, a little 1990s sophomoric, but I liked Sean Legacy AND Timothy Thatcher showing up. Thatcher could definitely rough up Swipe Right and Drake, that’d be fun to see. Donovan is tall, jacked, has great hair, he could be a dark horse for Men’s Evolve Champion.

Very good opener from Riley VS Javi, and that was a very good win for Riley. I like this crisis of confidence story Javi is on now, I hope this leads to big things for him. He’s been in the WWE system for a minute now, hopefully he can finally find his footing. And a great move to make Dani VS Kali the main event. That’s like one of the long standing stories in Evolve already, given it had the premiere episode kick it off. Great win for Kali, very good promo to end the show, her calling out the roster and some of the roster responding. I suppose seeds are planted for the final four there of Kali, Chantel, Kendal and Brinley.

The only problem is, Kali and Chantel are definitely Heels, while Kendal and Brin both feel one step away from turning Heel because of the new attitudes they’ve been showing. Maybe one of these Heels is beat by a Face in whatever tournament we get, but Kali does feel like a frontrunner for first champion.

My Score: 8.4/10