The Legend of Zelda: The Ring of Destiny, Chapter 79, THE FINALE

As another year winds down, HPW ups the ante with ABSOLUTE ANARCHY! Who will survive the most brutal night in Hyrule’s history?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

• HPW Death Mountain Championship Ladder Match: Groose VS El Taro Blanco VS Iron Knuckle VS Torbevito VS The Great Fairy VS Mipha; Mipha wins and becomes the new HPW Death Mountain Champion.
• Absolute Anarchy: The Six Sages VS Majora & The Faces of Evil; The Six Sages win.
• Six Man Tag: UnderWorld Order VS #OGDF; OGDF wins.
• HPW World Trios Championships: The MagicaLadies VS The Gerudo Sisterhood; The MagicaLadies win and retain the titles.
• HPW Goddess Championship: Tali w/ Shabonne VS Urbosa; Urbosa wins and becomes the new HPW Goddess Champion.
• Undisputed HPW Triforce World Championship Fatal 4 Way: Zelda VS Link VS Kage VS GANON; Zelda, Link & Kage all win.

PLAY BY PLAY

History. Her story. OUR story.

If everyone is the hero of their own story… Is yours a triumphant one? A tragic one? A bit of both, perhaps? Has the hero struggled to overcome? Have they stood upon the mountaintop to survey all they have conquered? Or have they simply struggled in vain? Is everyone the hero in their own story? Or do some willingly make themselves the villains in another’s journey? For there is not one story alone, but many stories that connect, overlap, intertwine, entangle, and even break away. Some stories fade away to be forgotten. Other stories are cut short before they can be fully told. But others withstand the test of time to be remembered for centuries.

This story, the larger picture, woven together from these stories, is never truly finished. But there are moments in time when you step back, look at it all, and marvel at how it came together. Intricate details, bold colors, powerful contrasts, layer upon layer, and perhaps some familiar patterns. This is the story that is truly greater than the sum of its parts, and its parts are the greatest you can find around the world. This story is… No. WE! ARE! H! P! W! And tonight’s story is HyruleMania SIX!

HPW Death Mountain Championship Ladder Match: Groose VS El Taro Blanco VS Iron Knuckle VS Torbevito VS The Great Fairy VS Mipha!

The Skyfall Stud is a TWO-TIME Death Mountain Champion, his HPW career having come full circle. But will he be able to keep the circle going as he must fight off five opponents at once? Or will someone else climb up and over him to reign on the mountaintop?

Everyone is sporting new ring gear for this special occasion. Groose is in all green so that his red hair stands out stronger. The White Taros is himself in all white with black trim. Iron Knuckle has a fresh, brighter version of his usual gear using shinier material than before. Torbevito is in a recreation of his father’s gear from the day El Torbellino won his first Zora Underwater Wrestling Championship, a great combination of teal and purple. The Great Fairy is wearing what looks like snow and icicles shaped in a leotard. And Mipha wears an almost holographic rainbow outfit with what look to be fish scale pattern.

The introductions are made, the belt is hanging high overhead, and we see who brings it down to elevate their legacy!

The bell rings, the six watch each other while the fans rally up, and they all look up to the belt. The fans rally up more as the six watch each other again. Then Blanco DECKS The Great Fairy! Torbevito RAMS Mipha into a corner while Knuckle fires hands with Groose! The fans fire up while Blanco kicks Great Fairy out of the ring. Torbevito whips Mipha corner to corner, but Mipha goes up and over with a backflip! Mipha keeps moving, ducks ‘n’ dodges, and LEAPING LARIATS! The fans cheer while Mipha keeps after Torbevito as he goes to ropes. Groose JABS Knuckle, and JABS, JABS, JABS! “GROOSE! GROOSE! GROOSE!”

Groose winds up, but then Knuckle JABS in return! And JABS, JABS, JABS in a much faster tempo! Knuckle fires fast hands in the corner, then RIDGE HANDS! Knuckle whips corner to corner, Groose reverses, then Groose runs up, but into an URENAGE! Blanco whips Great Fairy hard into barriers, then hurries to bring her around and whip her into more barriers! Blanco doesn’t stop, he brings her around to whip her into even more barriers! Great Fairy slumps down, Blanco stomps away on her, then goes for a ladder. But Knuckle seems to have the same idea as he goes out the other side to grab a ladder.

Knuckle and Blanco put both their ladders in at the same time, then step in. They see the other’s ladder, then look up to stare down. The fans rally up, but then Groose spins Blanco around, RIGHT HAND O’ THE GODDESS! The fans fire up as Blanco falls, but then Knuckle CHOPS Groose! The fans “WOO~” but then Groose JABS! “GROOSE!” CHOP! “WOO~!” JAB! “GROOSE!” “WOO~!” “GROOSE!” “WOO~!” “GROOSE!” “WOO~! WOO~! WOO~!” Knuckle backs Groose down with the chops, but then Groose blocks one! Groose wrenches the arm, wristlocks, and Great Fairy runs in from behind! She tilt-o-whirls Knuckle to RANA him away!

The fans fire up as Great Fairy kips up, handsprings back, and headscissors Groose! But Groose stops the rana, turns it into a wheelbarrow, and lifts Great Fairy up, only for her to land out of the back suplex! Great Fairy waistlocks, Groose fights the lift, and Torbevito is on the corner! Torbevito uses Groose as a step to hit Greaty Fairy with a DESTROYER!! Great Fairy flounders while the fans fire up, and she ends up lying down on one of the ladders. Groose swings on Torbevito but Torbevito ducks ‘n’ dodges to ROCK Groose! Torbevito then reels Groose in and uses the ropes in the WHIRL- NO, Groose stops the DDT!

Groose FLAPJACKS Torbevito onto Fairy and the ladder! The fans fire up while both Torbevito and Great Fairy writhe. Groose takes that ladder, stands it up, but Blanco is back! Blanco KICKS Groose in the leg, Groose hobbles, but he keeps the ladder up. Groose SHOVES the ladder at Blanco, Blanco catches it, so Groose RAMS Blanco and the ladder into a corner! Knuckle runs up, Groose steps aside, Knuckle BACK BODY BLOCKS the ladder and sandwiches Blanco! Blanco slumps down, the ladder leaning against the corner now. Groose reels Knuckle in and aims for the other ladder! Knuckle fights the suplex, then he fires body shots!

Knuckle turns things around, and now he tries to suplex! Now Groose fights the suplex, and he fires body shots in return! Groose takes a big swing, Knuckle ducks under, and he lifts Groose for a BIG back suplex on the ladder! The fans fire up again while Groose writhes in pain. Knuckle SENTONS onto Groose just to add on! Knuckle goes back to the first ladder as it traps Blanco, but Torbevito hobbles after him. Torbevito CLUBS Knuckle, but Knuckle just looks more annoyed than hurt. Knuckle HEADBUTTS Torbevito, Torbevito wobbles, and Knuckle whips Torbevito into the ladder! The fans are torn, but Knuckle runs up, only for Torbevito to dodge!

Knuckle crashes into the ladder with is back body block but he shakes it off. Only for Torbevito to run up and kick the ladder for the WHIRLPOOL DDT!! The fans fire up, but watch out for the ladder! It falls on its own, with Knuckle and Torbevito narrowly avoiding it. Torbevito drags the ladder to center and stands it up. Torbevito climbs, but Mipha returns. Mipha CLUBS Torbevito’s leg, then drags him down! Mipha ROCKS Torbevito, then snapmares him. Mipha sits Torbevito up to then run and basement DROPKICK! The fans cheer as Mipha kips up and hurries to the ladder! But then Great Fairy YANKS Mipha down!

Great Fairy ROUNDHOUSES Mipha! Mipha wobbles, Great Fairy TOSSES her out, and Great Fairy goes to the ladder. But then Blanco YANKS her down! And HEADBUTTS! Great Fairy wobbles, Blanco shakes it off, and he talks trash while he winds up. But Great Fairy blocks the kick to then KNEE Blanco in return! Great Fairy TOSSES Blanco out now, goes to the ladder, but Knuckle is back up! Knuckle CLUBS Great Fairy, then turns her around to tuck her in! But then Torbevito springboards in! MISSILE DROPKICK MUSCLE BUSTER COMBO! The fans fire up while Great Fairy tumbles out of the ring.

Torbevito hurries back to the ladder, climbs up, but Blanco takes the second ladder and JAMS it into the side of the first! Blanco makes a ladder bridge with that, and it helps him as a shortcut! The fans are torn as Blanco goes up the ladder, but Torbevito hurries to climb! They meet at the top and start throwing hands! The fans fire up as they go back and forth! Blanco gets the edge, so fans boo, and then Blanco reels Torbevito in. The fans already worry as Blanco tries to suplex! Torbevito fights the lift, but Blanco fires body shots! Blanco tries again, fans getting more and more tense! Blanco SUPERPLEXES Torbevito up and over onto the ladder bridge!!

The fans go nuts while that landing shakes the ladders and even the ring! Blanco and Torbevito both slump off the ladder bridge, and Knuckle is back up. Knuckle pushes the ladder bridge out of the ring, repositions the main ladder right under the belt, then starts the climb. The fans are torn as Knuckle goes higher and higher, but then Groose is back up! Groose pushes the ladder! The fans fire up as it tips over, and Knuckle falls off to HOTSHOT off ropes! Then Groose chicken wings Knuckle’s arms for a LOFTWING DRIVER! The fans fire up as Groose then hurries to get the ladder back up! But then Mipha CLUBS Groose!

Groose is not all that bothered by the hit, and he turns around slowly to look at Mipha. Mipha has her dukes up, but Groose just sighs, hands on his hips. Groose stays calm, but then Mipha SMACKS him! The fans fire up while Groose grimaces. Groose storms up but Mipha DROPKICKS the legs out! Groose ends up on the ropes, and the fans fire up as Mipha runs the ropes! TIGER SHARK FEINT KICK! The fans fire up as Mipha busts out a tribute to Rey Oceano! And with that, Mipha goes up the corner! FROG SPLASH! Direct hit and the fans fire up! Mipha then hurries to the ladder, only for Great Fairy to roll in!

Great Fairy swings, Mipha bobs ‘n’ weaves, then she takes a swing, only for Great Fairy to duck under. Mipha ELBOWS Great Fairy, then goes up the ladder, but just to jump and CUTTER! The fans fire up, Mipha hurries back to her feet, but Torbevito runs in! He also uses the ladder to kick off and WHIRLPOOL DDT! Torbevito clutches his lower back while the fans fire up. Torbevito hobbles over to the ladder, but then Blanco is back, with a chair! Blanco SMACKS Torbevito on the back! The fans boo while Torbevito slumps against the ladder! Blanco SMACKS Torbevito again, against the ladder! Torbevito falls to the mat, and Blanco JAMS him in the stomach!

Blanco stomps Torbevito, soaks up heat from the fans, but then Knuckle gets him with a SLEEPER from over the ropes! The fans fire up as Knuckle drags Blanco up and out to the apron! Blanco is hanging off the apron in the SLEEPER! But Blanco SMACKS Knuckle in the head with the chair! Knuckle lets Blanco go and Blanco goes to the floor. Blanco then fireman’s carries Knuckle from the apron, and DEATH VALLEY DRIVER through the table!! The fans go nuts and commentary is in complete disarray! Blanco leaves Knuckle behind to roll into the ring and go up the ladder. But Mipha anchors a foot!

The fans cheer Mipha, but Blanco kicks her and stomps her until she lets go. The fans boo as Blanco scuffs Mipha, then climbs up the ladder. Mipha crawls, but now Torbevito goes after Blanco! Blanco CLUBS at Torbevito, but Torbevito CLUBS Blanco! Blanco kicks Torbevito away, but Torbevito comes back to jump and CLUB Blanco again! Groose gets up, he ROCKS Torbevito, CLUBS Blanco, and then Torbevito CHOPS Groose on the back! Blanco kicks Groose, kicks Torbevito, tries to climb, but Great Fairy is back! Great Fairy climbs up to waistlock Blanco! Blanco clings to the rungs as Great Fairy tries to suplex!

The fans fire up, and they’re cheering on Mipha! Mipha has climbed up the other side of the ladder, unnoticed by the rest! Mipha reaches the top, and she KICKS away at Blanco! Blanco lets go of the ladder, he and Great Fairy fall on Groose and Torbevito! Mipha reaches up, and she brings down the belt! MIPHA WINS!

Winner: Mipha (NEW HPW Death Mountain Champion)

The fans all cheer as the littlest star in the match is now shining brightest from atop the ladder! Mipha has her first title in HPW, and at all! She said she was fighting to inspire, how many new stars will now shine because of her?

Absolute Anarchy: The Six Sages VS Majora & The Faces of Evil!

Yunobo, Sidon, Thunderbird/Teba, Riju, Donny B. Kool & Ladrona have all presented the “Glowing Aura Phenomenon,” and it wasn’t just a trick of the lights. They have stepped up to be guardians of justice here in Hyrule, and they’re doing just that against Harlequin, Militron, Lupay, Glutko, Hektan, and the Monster Mask! But who will win and who will survive the Absolute Anarchy?

Majora & The FOE enter in from the crowd?! The fans boo, but the six of them are very menacing as they head for ringside. They all wear darker, grungier versions of their usual ring gear. The lights then go down, and when they come back up, a spotlight is on stage where Yunobo, Sidon, Teba, Riju, Donny B. Kool & Ladrona are standing. They hold up the belts of the Six Sages, and they start glowing! “IT’S MORPHIN’ TIME!” There’re all kinds of light and energy and electricity shooting off them as their attire changes to be matching bodysuits, all white except for the highlights that match the colors of their belts: red, blue, green, yellow, orange, and purple!

“GO GO, THE SIX SAGES~! GO GO, THE SIX SAGES~! GO GO, THE SIX SAGEEES~! YOU MIGHTY MORPHIN’ POWER SAGEEEEEES~!” The fans are already fired up again as these six heroes storm down the ramp and to the ring to meet the Faces of Evil! The rules are then explained: Absolute Anarchy is TRULY Anything Goes, with Falls Count Anywhere specifically in this main arena. There are no count outs, no disqualifications, and no telling what is going to happen! The bell rings and the fans are thunderous as all twelve competitors stare down. And then Majora and the FOE glow with a DARK aura?!

From within their own bodies, the Faces of Evil bring out WEAPONS! And not pro-wrestling weapons like chairs and ladders, but actual weapons! And they dramatically pose with them, too. Harlequin and the Dragonbone Club! Lupay and the Flesh-Rendering Fang! Militron and the Wreckin’ Ball ‘n’ Chain! Glutko and the Megaton Hammer! Hektan and the Blizzard Rod! But where’s Majora’s weapon? Oh, he just brings out protruding tentacles! The Six Sages are a bit taken aback, but then a female voice says, “Use your belts!” The Six Sages nod and they raise their belts again. And now, we get more glowing and energy!

The belts become the weapons of the Six Sages! Yunobo’s Stalwart Feast Mace! Sidon’s Gallant Ocean Spear! Teba’s Swift Gale Bow! Riju’s Lighting Strike Scimitars! Donny B. Kool’s… Uh, Shakalaka Mojo Maracas? And Ladrona’s… Extravagant Battle Bangles? DBK and Ladrona are both unsure about their weapons. Donny shrugs and he starts shaking them up. The beat drops right away, “Gangsta boogie, gangsta boogie. DAMN~!”

Donny gets his groove on, and so does Majora…? This leaves the other ten to fan out! Teba goes up, he shoots arrows of pure wind, but Hektan counters with an ice blast! Sidon lunges in with the Ocean Spear, but the FOE spread out. Sidon spins the spear like a staff, Harlequin swings his club, but Sidon uses the spear’s butt end to deflect and slip past to strike with water blasts! Glutko and Yunobo go hammer to mace, Militron tries to hit Riju with the wrecking ball but she’s too small and nimble! Riju rushes Militron but Lupay intercepts, short sword against scimitars! The fans cheer as sparks quite truly fly off the clashing steel!

Teba circles the ring from above but Hektan keeps his eyes on the Rito. Hektan tries shooting first but Teba easily dodges with a corkscrew. Teba shoots back, Hektan bails out of the ring to avoid those. Hektan runs up the ramp, Teba flies after him. Ladrona still isn’t sure what her bangles are supposed to do, but she seems to notice something as she looks them over. Militron reels his wrecking ball in and swings at her now, but she dodges! Ladrona zigzags over the chain, and she’s reflecting light in Militron’s eyes! She’s using the bangles’ gemstones to blind Militron! Militron staggers a bit, Ladrona slips around and ROCKS him in the back!

Ladrona ducks the back elbow to BODY BLOW! The bangles’ gems are also acting like knuckle dusters! Ladrona fires more shots and she has Militron literally on the ropes! Speaking of ropes, Glutko pushes Yunobo back, then JAMS him up with the hammer! Yunobo tumbles out of the ring and Glutko pursues. The fans boo as Glutko runs up and JAMS Yunobo again! Yunobo staggers, but he CLOBBERS Glutko with the mace in return! Back in the ring, Riju and Lupay dodge and evade each other’s swipes, and Riju goes Matrix while she slides under! Riju then slips out of the ring, and she trips Lupay up to drag him out!

Riju SHOVES Lupay into barriers near the still demolished commentary desk. Lupay kicks Riju low in return, then TOSSES her up and over, into the crowd! The fans boo as Lupay pursues, but the fans have to stay back as the steel blades clash again! Sidon spins while he twirls the spear, then thrusts, only for Harlequin to narrowly duck under! Harlequin swings his club at Sidon’s legs, but Sidon manages to jump back. Sidon’s hammerhead spear lets him hook Harlequin and reel him in! Sidon KNEES low, then uses the spear handle as part of a SIDE LEG SWEEP! Cover, TWO! Ladrona fires a flurry of body shots, but then Militron takes a swing!

Ladrona bobs ‘n’ weaves the shots, then SUPER PUNCHES! Militron stumbles and falls into a corner. Teba divebombs Hektan to DROPKICK him! Hektan tumbles on the stage, Teba uses the bow like a staff weapon to SMACK him on the back! Hektan scrambles, takes aim with the rod, but Teba glides back to evade the ice blast. Teba leaps up into the air again to avoid another blast, to then DIVING DOUBLE STOMP! Glutko and Yunobo CLASH their hammer and mace against each other again, and there’s sparks flying there, too! Glutko has Yunobo on defense as he SMASHES again and again with the hammer!

Yunobo is truly on his heels as he uses the mace to shield himself! But wait, the mace is glowing? Is it heating up? And… sizzling? Glutko reels the hammer back, and Yunobo CLOBBERS Glutko again! Yunobo looks at the mace, and is surprised to see, “It’s ROCK ROAST!” Yunobo smiles and takes a big BITE of the mace?! Oh, well, it is called the “Stalwart Feast,” and Goron love to eat ore. Yunobo chews it up and gets it down, and it fires him up! Yunobo starts swinging, and now Glutko has to defend himself with his hammer as Yunobo SMASHES again and again and again! And the impacts are just keeping that Rock Roast sizzling hot!

Ladrona stalks Militron to barriers, stomps him down, then digs her boots in. The fans fire up with Ladrona, and she gets space. Ladrona takes aim, runs in, but Militron THROWS the Wrecking Ball at her! The ball CLOBBERS Ladrona! The fans lose their minds as Ladrona falls back! Sidon DROPKICKS Militron against the barriers instead! But then Harlequin CLOBBERS Sidon with the bone club, and that knocks Sidon into the barriers! The fans boo, but Harlequin takes aim! Sidon ducks the club and it SMASHES the LEDs in the barrier! The fans lose their minds again as the whole thing shorts out!

Donny and Majora keep on dancing, jumping, bobbing to the song, “Mama said knock you out! I’m gonna knock you out! Mama said knock you out! I’m gonna knock you out! Mama said knock you out! I’m gonna knock you out! Mama said knock you OUT!” And then Majora DECKS Donny, cutting the music off right there! (4:46) The fans boo, but Majora taunts Donny with, “I’m gonna knock you out~!” Donny sputters, Majora drags him up, and hits a back suplex! But Donny lands out, then he SMACKS Majora with a maraca! And then the other maraca! Donny gives Majora multiple hits, left to right, back to back! BAM BAM, BAM BAM, BAM BAM, then a DISCUS BAM!

The fans are fired up, and Donny says, “I’m gonna knock YOU out!” The fans cheer, and Donny stomps, stomps, “You Better Believe It!” Stomp, stomp, “You Better Believe It!” Majora crawls to a corner but Donny just stomps, stomps, “You Better Believe It!” Then Donny stomps a mudhole and the fans fire up because he doesn’t have to stop! Harlequin kicks Sidon, Sidon JAMS Harlequin up with the back of the spear, then again uses the back of the hammerhead to hook Harlequin and swing him into the POST! The fans cheer while Harlequin staggers around, and then Sidon SPEARS (tackles) Harlequin onto the wreckage of the desk!

The fans fire up, commentary is annoyed again, and wait, Riju and Lupay are now way up in the bleachers! The fans around there are wary of the sparks flying but they still cheer. Riju ducks a swing from Lupay to mule kick! Front kick! And a BOOT! Lupay stumbles into the pavilion! The fans back there fire up as they get to see some action up close now! Lupay scrambles to avoid scimitar slashes, and he LUPAYROONIS to keep Riju back! Lupay spins, Riju blocks, big sparks fly, and all this clashing seems to have powered up Riju’s weapons like it did Yunobo’s Rock Roast mace! Riju uses her scimitars to push the sword into the ground!

Riju keeps the sword down with her left sword, raises the right, and with a bolt of lightning, she STRIKES Lupay down! The fans are truly electric seeing that! Meanwhile, Teba keeps after Hektan as they’re offstage and fighting in another part of the crowd. Teba swoops in and SHOTGUN DROPKICKS Hektan into railing! Militron storms into the ring, Donny finally stops stomping and he CLUBS Militron with a maraca. But now Majora gets up, and he JUMP KNEES Donny down! The fans boo but Majora stalks Donny to ropes. Majora waistlocks to deadlift GERMAN SUPLEX Donny! Ladrona drags herself up to the apron, but Majora kicks her back down!

Sidon gets in the ring, but Militron intercepts him! Militron KNEES Sidon low, then uses the wrecking ball’s chain to tie Sidon up. Militron then swings Sidon into Majora’s LARIAT! The fans continue to boo Majora but he just flips them off. Teba digs his boots into Hektan, then lets off to get a lot of space. Teba runs back up, but Hektan BLASTS him with ice first! The fans boo while Teba goes down in a heap of frost! Hektan runs up to PENALTY KICK Teba! Hektan returns to ringside, and he helps Harlequin up. They go looking under the ring, and they bring out a TABLE! The fans are torn, because they hate FOE but love tables!

The table is set up outside the ring while Militron drags Sidon over to the ropes. Militron goes to the apron, drags Sidon out to join him, and the other FOE cheer him on while the fans boo. Militron reels Sidon in, but Sidon fights the lift! Sidon hooks the ropes, then CLUBS at Militron’s leg! The fans fire up, but then Harlequin winds up the Dragonbone Club! But then Riju tightrope walks the barriers! She FLYING DROPKICKS Harlequin down! The fans fire up, and then Teba is coming in from the other side! He FLYING DROPKICKS Hektan! The fans fire up again, Teba goes after Majora while Riju helps Sidon with Militron!

Riju jumps onto Militron for a SLEEPER while Sidon gets free. Teba dodges Majora to then springboard and CROSSBODY! The fans fire up again and Teba goes to a corner. Teba climbs up and aims at Majora, SHOOTING STAR PRESS! Cover, TWO! Sidon kicks Militron low, but Militron shoves him away! Militron THROWS Riju away into the ring! Teba storms up but Militron ROCKS him first! Sidon comes back and he SPEARS, but Militron stuffs it! Militron hauls Sidon up, DEVASTATOR down through the table! The fans either boo or lose their minds seeing the destruction! Even Harlequin says, “Daaaaaamn~!”

Majora stands, he goes after Teba, and Majora ROCKS Teba with a forearm! Teba staggers, but he comes back to KICK Majora in the leg! Majora hobbles, but he ROCKS Teba again! Riju is up, Majora CHOPS her! And ROCKS Teba! Teba rebounds, Majora avoids the dropkick! Teba kips up, Riju runs up, and Teba ALLEY-OOPS her for a DROPKICK! Majora staggers, rebounds, and he DOUBLE SHOULDER TACKLES them! The fans boo again but Majora just flexes and shouts. Ladrona drags herself back into the ring, Majora storms up on her, grabs her with both hands, and picks her up! But then Ladrona has a STAPLE GUN!

Ladrona puts the staple gun to Majora’s forehead and CLACK! The fans freak out while Majora drops Ladrona and clutches his forehead! CLACK, Ladrona gets Majora in the butt! Majora jumps around from the pain, but now Harlequin rushes in. Harlequin swings down, Ladrona steps aside, and CLACK in the shoulder! Harlequin is disarmed as he clutches his shoulder, but then CLACK, Ladrona staples him on the hand! Harlequin clutches the hand now, and CLACK, back to the shoulder! Harlequin goes to a corner, Ladrona runs in and BOOT WASHES him through the ropes! The fans fire up, but Hektan is back!

Hektan blasts ice but Ladrona dodges, so the ice hits Harlequin, knocking him out of the ring! Hektan keeps shooting, but Ladrona keeps dodging while circling around him! The whole ring is getting covered in frost and snow! Ladrona then tilt-o-whirls, IRON OCTOPUS, and then CLACK into Hektan’s arm! The fans fire up while Hektan writhes! Ladrona twirls the stapler gun before she pretends to holster it, but then Lupay’s back!? SUPERKICK! The fans boo as Ladrona falls! Lupay talks trash, but Teba hits WHITE LIGHTNING! Harlequin dragon sleepers Teba! TWISTED SENSE OF HUMOR!

Donny is up, and he POPPIN’ MY COLLARBONE! The fans fire up again, but Glutko CLOBBERS Donny! The fans boo again, but then Yunobo RAMS Glutko! Glutko rebounds to RAM Yunobo! Then they RAM again! And again! And again! Glutko SLAPS Yunobo, ROCKS Yunobo, then UPPERCUTS Yunobo! Glutko runs, but into a SPINEBUSTER! Yunobo stands up, holding that Stalwart Feast up! The fans fire up and Yunobo takes a BIG bite of the Rock Roast! Yunobo swings his arms, runs side to side, and he drops the GORON ELBOW! The fans fire up as Yunobo now waits on Glutko! Glutko staggers up, Yunobo clinches, ROCK ROAST BOTTOM!!

The fans are thunderous and Yunobo covers, but Majora LASHES him with his tentacle whips! The fans boo, but Majora LASHES Yunobo again and again! Yunobo writhes, and Majora goes to the corner! TORPEDO MAJORA!! Direct hit on Yunobo, but Ladrona is there to CLACK CLACK with the stapler!! And Riju is up top! But Militron finally rises from the wreckage!! Militron goes to the apron, but Sidon hooks Militron to YANK him back down! Then Sidon gives a thumbs up! ULTIMATE ELBOW DROP!! Direct hit on Majora! Riju covers, SIX SAGES WIN!!

Winners: The Six Sages, by pinfall

The fans are thunderous as our heroes are victorious! It was truly Absolute Anarchy, and the FOE has been vanquished! But will Ganon still take command of HPW? Or can the Hero of Hyrule, Princess of Hyrule, and Hero’s Shadow stop him?

Six Man Tag: UnderWorld Order VS #OGDF!

The New Year is right around the corner, but an old score needs to be settled first! Will history repeat itself in the end? Or will the OG Dark Forces finally avenge that original sin?

Well, speaking of throwbacks, the wrestling reapers are rocking recreations of their gear from the original HyruleMania! Same for ReDead as he wears the purple of Dark Forces, but now airbrushed with the uWo logo over the DF. But in return, Kevin Gibdo, Volga & Wizzro are wearing gear that parodies what the uWo normally wears, but in purple and gold. The trios sort out, and fittingly, ReDead starts against Kevin. The bell rings, the fans rally up, and the two circle. Death Sword swipes at Kevin, the ref reprimands, but ReDead also BLASTS Volga off the apron! The ref reprimands again, the fans boo, but ReDead BOOTS Kevin!

Kevin staggers into the uWo corner, ReDead throws hands, and the ref counts. ReDead stops at 4, tags Gomess, and they bring Kevin out, just to RAM him back into the uWo corner. Gomess RAMS Kevin again and again, then digs his shoulder. The fans boo, the ref reprimands and counts, Gomess backs off to tag Death Sword. Death Sword runs to BLAST Wizzro off the corner now! The ref reprimands again, but Gomess feeds Kevin to a BOOT from Death Sword! The fans boo more, but Death Sword soaks it up as he looms over Kevin. Death Sword drags Kevin up, puts him against the ropes, and CHOKES him!

The fans boo and the ref reprimands, but Death Sword stops at 4. Death Sword argues with the ref, which lets Gomess CHOKE Kevin! The fans boo again, but Gomess gets away with it. Death Sword drags Kevin up, tags Gomess, and they mug Kevin. The fans boo more while Gomess taunts Volga. The ref keeps Volga back, and that lets Gomess CLAW Kevin’s face! The fans boo even more, but Gomess then shoves Kevin into a corner. Gomess climbs up and he rains down fists! The fans boo, but Gomess still goes to TEN! Gomess hops down, whips Kevin corner to corner, then taunts Volga again as he runs in, LARIAT!

The fans boo but Gomess just soaks up the heat. Gomess whips corner to corner again, still taunts Volga, and runs in, but Kevin BOOTS Gomess down! The fans fire up while Kevin hobbles towards the OGDF corner, hot tag to Volga! The fans fire up even more as Volga runs up on Gomess and fires off fists! The ref reprimands and counts as Gomess is against the ropes! Volga stops to shout and get the fans even more into this! Volga then fires a right, left, then SPINNING CHOP! Gomess is stinging as he goes back to the ropes, and Volga ENZIGIRIS him against them! Waistlock and O’Conner Roll, TWO!

Volga rebounds from the ropes to PENALTY KICK Gomess! Volga then sets up for a STANDING MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! The fans fire up again, and Volga hurries to get Gomess up. Volga bumps Gomess off buckles, stomps a mudhole into Gomess, then tags Wizzro. The fans cheer as Wizzro stomps a mudhole into Gomess. Wizzro digs his boot in, the ref reprimands and counts, but Wizzro runs side to side. Wizzro BOOT WASHES Gomess! The fans cheer as Wizzro drags Gomess to a cover, TWO! Wizzro keeps Gomess down with a chinlock, then brings him around. The fans rally while Gomess endures, fights up, and fires body shots.

Gomess is free, but Wizzro bobs ‘n’ weaves to then ROCK Gomess! Wizzro runs, but into a CHOP! The fans “WOO~” while Wizzro falls right down! Gomess snarls, he drags Wizzro up, and he whips him hard into the uWo corner! Wizzro drops to his knees, Gomess tags ReDead, and ReDead scoops Wizzro to SLAM him down! “III’M THE MAAAN~!” The fans boo while ReDead flexes, then he scoops Wizzro again. SLAM! “III’M THE MAAAN~!” The fans chant, “No You’re Not! No You’re Not!” ReDead says, “Yes I am!” He scoops Wizzro again as he shouts, “YES! I!” But then Wizzro slips free! JUMP NECKBREAKER!

The fans fire up while both men are down! Wizzro and ReDead crawl, hot tags to Death Sword and Kevin! The fans fire up as Kevin fires haymakers on Death Sword! Kevin whips, Death Sword reverses, but Kevin LEAPING LARIATS! Gomess rushes in, Kevin sidesteps, then he dodges a lariat to RUNNING DDT! The fans fire up with Kevin, but then Death Sword ROCKS Kevin! Kevin staggers to a corner, Death Sword runs in, but Kevin DUMPS him out to the apron! Death Sword lands safe, but then he collapses?! Death Sword clutches his thigh while he’s down on the apron, and he shouts, “MY LEG!”

Kevin hesitates while the ref goes out to check Death Sword. Death Sword tries to walk but his leg gives out and he drops to his knees. The crowd falls to a hush as the ref also has the ringside medic check Death Sword. Kevin isn’t sure what to do. He wanted to win the match, not injure someone. Gomess walks over to Death Sword to check on him, and the fans murmur with concern. Gomess talks with the ref about the match, and- Wait, is that Grim Creeper slipping in from the crowd side?! Creeper slides into the ring and uses a chair to SMACK Kevin!! The fans boo but Creeper slithers out of the ring before the ref notices!

Death Sword then suddenly rushes into the ring?! His leg wasn’t hurt at all! The fans boo even more, but Death Sword reels Kevin in, and manages to lift him up! POWERBOMB! High stack, Volga & Wizzro break it! The fans fire up, but now Gomess and ReDead rush in! They throw hands with Volga and Wizzro, and ReDead TOSSES Wizzro out! Gomess ROCKS Volga, Volga ROCKS Gomess, but ReDead storms up on Volga. Volga ELBOWS ReDead away, but Gomess kicks Volga low! Gomess snap suplexes Volga down, ReDead returns for the DEAD LEG! The fans boo while Volga sputters his way out of the ring.

The uWo regroups around Kevin, and they taunt him as he gets up. ReDead eggs Kevin on, and Kevin fires off haymakers on them all! The fans fire up as Kevin ROCKS the uWo again and again! Kevin DECKS Gomess, BOOTS ReDead, but then Death Sword BOOTS Kevin! Kevin staggers, rebounds, and he BOOTS Death Sword back! Death Sword rebounds, but then Kevin blocks the boot! Kevin spins Death Sword to BLINDSIDE LARIAT! Death Sword staggers into the ropes, comes back, and Kevin guzels! CHOKE SLAM! The fans fire up again, and Kevin slashes his throat! Kevin drags Death Sword up, but Creeper is back!

The fans boo as the ref stops Creeper from getting in the ring! ReDead gets in, and he CHOKES Kevin using a merch shirt! The fans boo again, but Kevin backs ReDead up into Creeper! Creeper falls, the ref sees the shirt, and ReDead has to let go. ReDead argues with the ref, but then Volga & Wizzro trip ReDead and drag him out of the ring! Kevin goes back to Death Sword, scoops him, and TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER!! Cover, OGDF wins!

Winners: OGDF, by pinfall

Vengeance, thy name is Kevin! He seals the deal, and now both sides can finally move on from this grudge. Right…? ReDead gets back in the ring and he stares Kevin down. Then he offers a handshake. Kevin is a bit surprised, but he accepts the handshake. The fans cheer as there is now peace between uWo and OGDF.

HPW World Trios Championships: The MagicaLadies VS The Gerudo Sisterhood!

For the first time ever, two teams of ALL WOMEN battle for these belts, and here for the Celebration of Greatness! Midna, Cia & Lana wish to truly embody the Golden Goddesses, as indicated by their ring gear, but will they personify power, wisdom, and courage? Or will the Gerudo Sisterhood once again bring reign to the desert?

The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see who wins a battle of femme fatales!

The teams sort out and Midna starts against Nabooru. The fans rally as the two stare down. They slowly circle, feel things out, and Nabooru headlocks. Midna endures as Nabooru grinds the hold. Midna pries at the hold, opens it up, but Nabooru powers it closed. The fans rally again, and Nabooru hits a takeover. Nabooru grinds Midna down, but Midna headscissors. Nabooru kips free, but now Midna hits a headlock and takeover. Nabooru headscissors, Midna kips free, Nabooru headlocks again, but Midna lifts her! Nabooru thrashes to fight it off, so Midna fires body shots. Midna powers up and out, and then RUNS Nabooru over!

The fans rally while Midna smirks. Midna then runs, but Nabooru stays down, then hurdles over. Nabooru DROPKICKS Midna! Midna falls and the fans fire up! Nabooru hurries to cover, ONE! The fans cheer as Midna and Nabooru hurry back up to their feet. Nabooru hits another headlock takeover! The fans cheer again while Midna endures the grind again. Midna tries the headscissors but Nabooru shrugs it off. Nabooru puts on the pressure, Midna endures, and she rolls it to a cover. TWO, Nabooru lets go and both women stand up again. The fans cheer the standoff, and both Midna and Nabooru go to their corners.

Nabooru tags Aveil, and Midna checks with Cia. Cia holds her hand out, and Midna tags Cia in. The fans cheer as Cia and Aveil circle. They feel things out, the two tie up, and Cia wrenches to a wristlock. Aveil wrenches in return, but Cia rolls and wrenches again. Cia then shifts to a hammerlock and puts on the pressure. Aveil reaches around, slips through and switches the hammerlock onto Cia. Cia reaches around but Aveil puts on the pressure. Cia goes to the ropes, steps through to the apron, then steps back in, and now Aveil’s arm is wrapped around the ropes! The fans are torn but ref Maron Ron Ron reprimands.

Cia lets go at 4, then headlocks Aveil, only for Aveil to slip out the back to have the hammerlock again! The fans applaud while Cia reaches for the ropes. Aveil turns her from the ropes and puts more pressure on the hammerlock. Cia sits, rolls, then sweeps a leg! Cover, ONE! Aveil sweeps a leg to cover, ONE! The fans cheer as these two stand off. Cia backs away towards the corner, as does Aveil, but then Cia runs up to CLOBBER Aveil from behind! The fans are torn, the Gerudo Sisterhood protest but Cia drags Aveil from the corner. Cia KNEE DROPS on Aveil’s back! Cia then ties up Aveil’s legs and pulls her into a BOW ‘N’ ARROW!

The fans rally as Aveil endures, and Aveil pops free! Cover, ONE! Cia hurries to her feet, ENZI- NO, Aveil ducks it! Aveil hurries to waistlock, but Cia slips out the back! Cia trips Aveil, then hops up to body scissor! She turns Aveil over and bridges back, HYRULE CLUTCH! TWO and Aveil has Cia in a SLEEPER! The fans rally, Cia flails, and she rolls back to a cover! TWO, and both women stand up for another standoff! The fans cheer, and Cia says now she’s going to her corner. Aveil says back, “Oh now? Now?” Aveil watches Cia just in case, and Cia is right in the MagicaLadies corner. Aveil backs up now, and she tags Buliara while Cia tags Lana.

The fans rally up as Lana and Buliara step to each other. Though rather than face to face, Lana is more face to chest with Buliara. Even so, Lana looks up at Buliara with a determined stare. Buliara chuckles, then raises her hand to call for a Test of Strength. Lana reaches up, but she’s still fingertips short. Lana stands on her tiptoes to complete the knuckle lock, and Buliara smirks as she reaches down to complete the other. The fans cheer as the two go shoulder to shoulder, and Lana puts everything she has into pushing Buliara, but Buliara isn’t budging! Buliara continues to smirk, and she powers Lana into bridging back!

The fans rally as Lana keeps herself up, but Buliara sweeps the legs out. Knuckle lock cover, TWO as Lana gets an arm up! Buliara pushes that down for the cover, TWO as Lana gets her other arm up. Buliara pushes that arm down, TWO as Lana bridges again! The fans cheer, but Buliara jumps! Only for Lana to block the drop and teetertotter her way up! Lana RANAS Buliara into a cover, only for Buliara to roll through to a sunset, but Lana rolls free of that! Lana rebounds to then rolling jackknife bridge! TWO and Buliara rolls with Lana to reel her in! Buliara lifts but Lana pops up and over to sunset flip in return!

The fans rally as Buliara flails to stay up! Buliara reaches down, YANKS Lana up into her arms, and then pops her up to a fireman’s carry! USHIGO- NO, Lana handsprings through! Lana rebounds, tilt-o-whirls, and DEJA VU RANA! The fans fire up with Lana while Buliara tumbles to an open corner! Buliara is surprised and Lana eggs her on. Buliara runs up on Lana but Lana drop toeholds her! Lana floats to a headlock, but Buliara rises up. The fans rally, Buliara back suplexes, but Lana lands on her feet. Lana turns to tag Cia, then she DROPKICKS Buliara! Buliara stays up, so Cia DROPKICKS her! Buliara is still up!

Lana & Cia DOUBLE DROPKICK Buliara out of the ring! The fans fire up, but Aveil & Nabooru run in! The sisters dodge, and Midna is there to DOUBLE LARIAT them! The fans cheer and sing, “OHHH~, Magical Laaadies~!” Maron reprimands, Midna and Lana exit, and Cia goes out to fetch Buliara. Cia puts Buliara in, then aims from the ropes. Slingshot SENTON! Cover, TWO! Cia stays on Buliara with a chinlock and she grinds her down. The fans rally while Buliara endures, and she fights back up. Cia becomes a backpack as Buliara is back on her feet. Buliara THROWS Cia off, then stalks her.

Buliara clamps on for a waistlock, then deadlifts Cia for a GERMAN SUPLEX! The fans rally and duel while Buliara holds onto Cia. Buliara drags Cia up again, GERMAN SUPLEX! The dueling is stronger now as Buliara still holds on! Buliara drags Cia up a third time, but Midna stops the lift! Cia ducks so Midna can ROCK Buliara with a forearm! The fans fire up, Maron reprimands, but Buliara just scowls. Buliara swings but Midna ducks! Midna swings again, but Buliara ducks! Maron reprimands them both but they DOUBLE FOREARM! Midna and Buliara both stagger, Cia tags Lana back in! Lana runs at Buliara in the corner to back body block!

Lana hurries to the other corner and she whips Midna corner to corner! Midna SPLASHES Buliara! Midna coordinates with Lana while the fans fire up. Midna whips Buliara while Lana runs up, but Buliara reverses! Lana DROPKICKS Midna! The fans fire up and Lana panics, but Buliara hot tags Aveil! Aveil goes up the corner to MISSILE DROPKICK Lana! The fans fire up more, but Cia runs in! Aveil dodges Cia, handsprings, but Cia gets clear! Cia kicks but Aveil blocks to KNEE Cia in return! Cia wobbles, Aveil spins her around, and GERMAN SUPLEXES! The save was for naught! The fans rally as Aveil goes after Lana.

Aveil reels Lana in, hooks a leg, but Lana fights the lift by kicking her free leg! Lana drags Aveil down into a small package, TWO! Both women stand, Lana ROCKS Aveil, Aveil UPPERCUTS, Lana SOBATS! Lana runs, but Aveil TIGER WALL KICKS! ENZI- NO, Lana ducks it! DOUBLE STOMP on Aveil’s back! Cover, TWO!! The fans are thunderous while Lana is frustrated. Lana calls to her team, Midna rises up at the corner, but Midna doesn’t look happy. Lana reaches out, but Midna doesn’t?! Aveil YANKS Lana back! The fans boo Midna while Aveil anchors Lana to tag Nabooru! Midna just stares at Lana while Nabooru stomps Lana!

Nabooru drags Lana up and puts her in the Gerudo corner to stomp a mudhole in. Midna hops off the corner while Aveil tags back in. The fans boo Midna more while Aveil reels Lana in for a snap suplex! Aveil sees Midna walking to the ramp, so she goes back to tag Nabooru. Aveil and Nabooru set up in opposite corners, aiming at Lana in the middle. They both run up, but MIDNA SPEARS NABOORU! The fans erupt as Midna returns to save Lana! Aveil goes after Midna, Midna DUMPS her to the apron, and then BOOTS her down! Buliara is back to waistlock Midna while she’s in the ropes! HIGH ANGLE GERMAN SUPLEX!

The fans fire up again as Buliara looms over Midna. But Cia tilt-o-whirl DDTS Buliara!! The fans are thunderous again as Cia helps Midna and Lana up! Cia & Lana then go to Nabooru while Midna climbs a corner! MAGIC KILLER followed by TWISTED TWILIGHT!! Cover, MagicaLadies win!!

Winners: The MagicaLadies, by pinfall (still HPW World Trios Champions)

It was an epic battle, and it almost seemed like Midna, Cia & Lana were falling apart! But as they all hug now, was that perhaps part of the plan? The Gerudo Sisterhood regroups, then they step back into the ring. The fans are worried, MagicaLadies are wary, but the Gerudo Sisterhood offer handshakes! The fans cheer, “YES! YES! YES!” and so the MagicaLadies accept! The fans cheer this great show of respect and sportsmanship as these two teams turn the page.

HPW Goddess Championship: Tali w/ Shabonne VS Urbosa!

Speaking of the Gerudo Sisterhood, the Dame of the Dunes was once part of the team, but her selfish ambition created a rift that could not be repaired. So now, to humble the Desert Colossus, a Gerudo legend steps back into the ring! Will Urbosa strike Tali down with great vengeance and furious anger? Or will Tali be the one to ring in the New Year?

Tali has gone full Faces of Evil/Dark Forces with her ring gear, and Shabonne even wears a new suit in matching colors. Urbosa wears a brilliant recreation of the gear she wore in what was her last match years ago. The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who is the true Goddess of the Desert!

The bell rings and the fans rally behind Urbosa. The two circle, feel things out, and they tie up collar ‘n’ elbow. They’re in a deadlock, then they break. They shake out their arms and tie up again. They’re in another deadlock, but Urbosa uses her height advantage to push Tali back step by step! The fans rally as Urbosa puts Tali on the ropes, and Shabonne protests already. Referee Maron Ron Ron counts, Urbosa backs off slowly yet cleanly. The fans applaud the sportsmanship, and Urbosa welcomes Tali to try again. Tali storms up on Urbosa, they tie up again, but again, Urbosa powers Tali to the ropes.

The fans cheer, but then Tali turns things around. Maron counts again, Tali backs off slowly, but then she pie faces Urbosa! The fans boo and Maron reprimands, but Tali just eggs Urbosa on. Urbosa storms up on Tali, but Tali SLAPS her! The fans boo more but Urbosa ROCKS Tali! Tali staggers while the fans fire up! Shabonne coaches Tali while she steadies herself. Tali storms up on Urbosa and takes swings, but Urbosa bobs ‘n’ weaves to then HEADBUTT! Tali wobbles, Urbosa shakes it off, and she reels Tali in for a stalling suplex! The fans cheer and count along, but Tali knees Urbosa at four! The fans boo as Tali now suplexes!

Tali holds Urbosa up, but now Urbosa knees Tali! Urbosa lifts, Tali fights it! Tali lifts, Urbosa fights it! The fans rally harder as the two teeter totter with suplex attempts! They go back and forth, lift after lift, and finally Urbosa suplexes Tali up and over! The fans fire up while both Gerudo are down! Shabonne is furious, she shouts at Tali to get up, and Tali crawls to a corner. Shabonne hurries over to coach Tali up again, but Urbosa grabs Tali’s legs! Tali grabs Shabonne, but Urbosa just drags them both in! The fans fire up, but Maron reprimands Shabonne! Shabonne says she didn’t wanna be in the ring! Tali CLAWS Urbosa’s eyes in the distraction!

The fans boo as Tali puts Urbosa in a corner. Tali stomps a mudhole into Urbosa, the fans boo more, and Maron reprimands and counts. Tali stops at 4, then she runs corner to corner to RAM Urbosa! The fans boo as Tali digs her shoulder in and Maron counts. Tali stops at 4 again, then she whips Urbosa corner to corner hard! Urbosa stumbles and falls, the fans boo, but Tali storms over to Urbosa again. Tali drags Urbosa back up, CLUBS her in the chest, then hoists her up to the top rope. Tali climbs up after Urbosa while the fans rally again. Urbosa fights the lift! Urbosa fires body shots while the fans rally more!

Urbosa CLUBS Tali, CLUBS her again, then HEADBUTTS Tali! Tali falls off the corner! The fans cheer as Urbosa adjusts her position, and DIVING BODY PRESS! Cover, TWO! Tali survives but the fans rally behind Urbosa again. Urbosa drags Tali up, but Tali lifts Urbosa to POWERSLAM her outta nowhere! Cover, TWO! The fans fire up while both Gerudo are down again! Tali snarls as she rises and the fans boo. Tali goes to a corner, and she shouts for Urbosa to get up. Urbosa slowly stands up, Tali runs in, but Urbosa sends Tali’s spear into the other corner! Shabonne panics as Tali crashes into buckles!

Tali staggers while clutching a shoulder, and Urbosa storms up to push and whip her. Tali blocks by holding the ropes, but the bad arm bothers her. Urbosa waistlocks and GERMAN SUPLEXES! The fans fire up while Urbosa holds on! Urbosa drags Tali up again, Tali reaches out, but the bad arm can’t get the ropes! GERMAN SUPLEX! Urbosa then drags Tali up again, GERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO!! Tali survives, but Urbosa holds on! And she moves up into the CAMEL CLUTCH!! Tali freaks out while the fans fire up! Shabonne freaks out, too, and she shouts for Tali to fight forward! But Urbosa bends Tali back!

Tali claws at the mat, gets her good arm free, and fights forward, but Urbosa shifts back to a waistlock to gator roll Tali! And then deadlift GERMAN SUPLEX! The fans fire up with Urbosa as she stands back up! Urbosa goes for Tali’s arms again, but with chicken wings! Urbosa lifts Tali up, for the SCORCHER! Cover, Urbosa wins!

Winner: Urbosa, by pinfall (NEW HPW Goddess Champion)

And the living legend is once again a champion! Tali has been humbled, if for now, as Urbosa holds the title high overhead! But will the heroes continue to win over the villains? Or will it not be a happily ever after?

Undisputed HPW Triforce World Championship Fatal 4 Way: Zelda VS Link VS Kage VS GANON!

Look how far we’ve come. The original Triforce Tournament crowned a Triforce Champion, and the battles back and forth soon called for an undisputed champion to be crowned. There is so much history between The Princess of Hyrule, the Hero of Hyrule, the Hero’s Shadow, and The Gerudo Ace, and we add one more chapter!

Kage makes his entrance first, wearing golden armor that looks to have been through some serious battles. Oh, he’s the Hero’s Shade! Next out is Link, and while he wears a ragged hood and tunic, he has an almost futuristic armor on underneath! Green plating with golden-yellow highlights, blue LED lights glowing all over, and it seems even his eyes are glowing gold now. What a mysterious construct! For Ganon, the lights come down and there’s a lot of fire. Ganon rises up from under the stage, wearing a new headdress. The eyes on the headdress are glowing! Yellow pupils outlined by red, with blue sclera and blue veins!

The lights come up, and it’s a very bird-like dragon head with many horns and red plumage. Ganon walks with the train of the headdress like a serpentine dragon flowing behind him! It’s as if he is bringing true calamity with him as he goes. Ganon circles around the ring before settling at a corner for the headdress to rest. The lights go back down and the fire fades. Is that a shooting star? Then the lights all flash back on, with a LOT of spotlights on stage! And shimmering with her own bird-dragon headdress, it’s Zelda! Yellow pupil, blue iris, purple sclera, and golden eye lashes adoring the headdress, along with white fur and a golden mane! The horns even glow!

Zelda also wears a white-and-green gown adorned with golden embroidering, and underneath is similar ring gear, white with green and gold highlights. Like Ganon, the train of the headdress flows behind her as she walks down to the ring, and she does a lap around the ring in the opposite direction as Ganon, her headdress resting on the opposite corner. This therefore means Link and Kage take the remaining corners, and the fans cheer seeing all these amazing costumes. The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and it is time to finish the story!

The bell rings and the fans are already fired up! “This is Awesome!” as the four stare down from the corners. The four take a step forward, and then Kage MASTER SWORDS Link! The fans are torn as Kage keeps after Link, leaving Zelda to KICK Ganon in the leg! Ganon takes a swing, Zelda ducks it and KICKS his leg again. Ganon BOOTS Zelda into the corner! The fans boo but Zelda dodges Ganon to KICK him in the chest! Kage DUMPS Link out of the ring, then runs side to side to WRECK him with a dropkick! Zelda KICKS Ganon again, and again, but then Ganon blocks one! Ganon gets up and under Zelda, SPINEBUSTER!

The fans boo, but Kage runs up to MASTER SWORD Ganon! Ganon staggers to ropes, Kage fires haymakers and body shots, and the fans fire up! Ganon SHOVES Kage back, Kage rolls to his feet, then ducks the lariat! Kage SUPERKICKS and Ganon staggers. Link springboards to FLYING KNEE Ganon down! Then Link SUPERKICKS Kage! Kage falls, Link covers, but Zelda breaks it! Link turns around, takes a swing, but Zelda catches him for an ARMBAR TAKEDOWN! The fans fire up but Link hurries to clasp hands! Link fights to stack Zelda, TWO, and Link deadlifts Zelda! But Zelda shifts around for another ARMBAR TAKEDOWN!

The fans fire up again while Link fights around! Link tries to clasp hands, but Zelda stomps him down! Zelda pulls on the arm, but Ganon gets Link’s legs. Ganon rolls Link onto his stomach, which turns Zelda over, too! Ganon stomps Link, then waistlocks Zelda for a deadlift GERMAN SUPLEX! BLINDSIDE SUPERKICK from Kage to Ganon! Ganon flounders away to the ropes, but Link stands up. The fans rally as the brothers are alone in the ring. The two circle, and then they just start throwing hands! The fans fire up again as the shots are fast ‘n’ furious! Link gets the edge, and he ROCKS, CHOPS, and whips Kage to ropes.

Kage ducks ‘n’ dodges Link, and he DIVES onto Ganon! Ganon is sent into the commentary desk! Rusl complains, they just got this put back together! Kage goes back to the apron but Link SUPERKICKS him back down! Kage stumbles into Ganon, and Link builds speed to DIVE onto them both! The fans fire up as they all hit the desk! Commentary freaks out, but the desk stays up! Link hurries to put Kage back in the ring, then drags him up for a FALCON ARROW! Link goes to a corner, climbs up, FIRE ARROW! Cover, TWO! Link CLUBS and HAMMERS away on Kage, then goes back up the corner.

Zelda hurries to trip Link up! The fans are torn as Link lands on his link between worlds, and Zelda climbs up after him. Zelda brings Link to the very top, and fans are already concerned. Zelda jumps up to SUPER DUPER POISON-RANA! But Link lands on his feet?! The fans are losing their minds, and Zelda is confused by the raucous cheering. Zelda slowly turns around to see Link standing there! “This is Awesome!” as Zelda stands back up to face Link. Zelda rushes up, Link blocks the leg pick with a facelock, but Zelda wrenches out to have the facelock in return. Link fights up, even as Zelda cranks on the facelock.

Link pries the facelock open to wrench and wristlock, but Zelda rolls, rolls back, handsprings, and arm-drags Link. Zelda then runs up and jumps on, GUILLOTINE FACELOCK! The fans fire up as Zelda drags Link down, body scissors locked in! Link endures, fights back up, and he reaches out, only for Zelda to let the facelock go and shift around to get the arm in a KIMURA! The fans rally again as Link endures, and he grabs the ropes! Technically it’s a Ropebreak, but there’s No Disqualifications so Zelda can still hold on! Link steps through the ropes, the ropes get in Zelda’s face, and that forces her to let go of the arm.

Zelda and Link end up on the apron, and Link SUPER- NO, Zelda goes Matrix to dodge! Zelda kicks, Link blocks, and he puts that leg in the ropes to HOOK SHOT! Zelda sputters, but then Ganon runs up to CHOP her down! Zelda falls from apron to floor, then Ganon SWEEPS Link’s legs! Link also hits the apron, but Ganon drags Link up for a fireman’s carry. Ganon goes up the steel steps, then to the apron. APRON DEATH VALLEY DRIVER!! Ganon shoves Link into the ring while the fans either boo or lose their minds. Cover, TWO!! Link survives, the fans fire up, but Ganon seethes. Ganon drags Link back up to reel him back in.

Ganon lifts Link, but Link throws down fists! Link RANAS free! Ganon tumbles to the ropes, Link runs up, but Ganon LARIATS Link down! The fans boo, Ganon tells them to shut up, and he drags Link up to GERMAN SUPLEX! No hesitation! Link tumbles but Ganon storms over to him again. Ganon drags Link right up for another GERMAN SUPLEX! The fans boo as Link has another hard landing! Ganon fires up while the fans just boo him more. But Zelda jumps on for a SLEEPER! The fans fire up as Ganon staggers around with Zelda as a backpack! Ganon THROWS Zelda down, then storms up to DECK her!

The fans boo even harder as Ganon looms over Zelda. Ganon waistlocks and deadlifts Zelda right up! But then Kage SMACKS Ganon with a chair! Ganon lets Zelda go as he almost drops to his knees! Zelda hits the HYLIAN KISS HEADBUTT! Ganon sputters, and then Link runs up to MASTER SWORD Ganon down! The fans fire up, and the other three seem to have an understanding. They drag Ganon up and out of the ring, and right to commentary! The fans fire up, commentary freaks out again, and the trio of Link, Kage and Zelda hoists Ganon up! TRIPLE POWERBOMB down through the table!!

The fans are electric, commentary is speechless (and not just because their headsets are offline), and then Kage DECKS Link! Zelda goes after Kage, they scrap and brawl around the way, and Kage gets under Zelda to RAM her into barriers! And then into the apron! And then back to barriers! Kage puts Zelda in the ring, storms up, then full nelsons! Zelda fights the lift, pries at the hold, and breaks free! Zelda goes for an arm but Kage rolls to avoid the takedown. Kage wrenches, hammerlocks, and hits a BIG back suplex onto that arm! Zelda writhes, but Link is back to ROCK Kage! Kage ROCKS Link in return!

Link ROCKS Kage again! Kage ROCKS Link again! The fans rally as the shots keep going back and forth, but then Zelda runs up to DOUBLE SHOTGUN them both! The fans fire up again, and Zelda hurries to bring Link up. Link slips around to waistlock, but Zelda wrenches free to then slips through and get under, NORTHERN LIGHTS! Kage rushes up to waistlock Zelda, but she switches with Kage to SLAM him down, then gator roll for a short arm scissors! Link KICKS Zelda in the back, KICKS Kage away, then wrenches Zelda to whip to ropes. Zelda reverses, KITCHEN SINK KNEE! Then a GAMANGIRI for Kage in a corner!

The fans fire up as both brothers are down, and Zelda gets them side by side, then chicken wings one arm each! The fans go nuts seeing a DOUBLE CATTLE MUTILATION! The fans are thunderous as Link and Kage both kick around, reach out, ROPEBREAK from Kage! Zelda still holds, but she loses her grip as the brothers go in opposite directions. Zelda lets go but the fans are still going nuts! Zelda waves to the fans while the brothers get up slowly. Zelda fires forearms on Link, Kage kicks Zelda, CLUBS her, and the brothers look to each other. They reel Zelda in for a DOUBLE SUPLEX! Then Kage ROCKS Link!

Kage TOSSES Zelda, fires off on Link, then whips. Link reverses to ELBOW Kage down! Cover, TWO! Link stomps Kage, but Zelda is back to UPPERCUT Link down! The fans rally as Zelda stands Kage up to UPPERCUT him down! Kage goes to the apron, Link ROCKS Zelda! And ROCKS her again! Zelda UPPERCUTS in return! Zelda drags Link around, hooks up the legs, and the fans fire up as she reaches for arms. Link fights it but Zelda pulls his hair! Zelda gets Link’s arms, and pulls back, but she can’t quite get Link up for the surfboard, so she STOMPS the knees! Link writhes but Zelda has the legs and steps through for a DEATHLOCK!

Link endures, Kage ELBOW DROPS Zelda! Link is free, Kage ROCKS Zelda then RAMS her into a corner. Kage runs corner to corner but Zelda drop toeholds him into buckles! Zelda UPPERCUTS Link, KICKS him to a corner, but Link CHOPS! Zelda UPPERCUTS again! The fans fire up as the shots go back and forth! Kage CLOBBERS them both! Kage whips corner to corner, Zelda goes up and over! Zelda runs at Link, Link goes up and over! Link somersaults, dodges, and Zelda ROCKS Kage! Zelda runs up on Link but he shouts, “STOP!” ENZIGIRI! Zelda tumbles out of the ring, Kage is right on her with haymakers!

The fans fire up as Link builds speed! Link FLIES to wipe out Kage and Zelda! The fans are thunderous for “H P DUB! H P DUB!” Link puts Kage in the ring, covers, TWO! Link CHOPS Kage, the fans “WOO~,” and Link ROCKS Kage. Link whips, Kage reverses, but Link grabs ropes! Kage backflips through his own dropkick! MASTER SWORD from Kage to Link! Link rebounds to MASTER SWORD in return! Kage wobbles, but he roars back at Link! Link ROCKS Kage, BACK ELBOWS, then PELES! Kage staggers, Link kips up, DOUBLE SUPERKICKS wipe them both out! Zelda returns, and she waits on someone to sit up.

Kage is first, Zelda KICKS him in the chest! Then she KICKS Link! And KICKS Kage! Kage tumbles out of the ring, so Zelda brings Link up to wrench the arm and ELBOW BREAKER! Then Zelda hammerlocks and wrangles Link to trap that arm. Zelda bends the other arm back, and CRANKS it back! Cover, TWO! The fans rally while Link shakes out his arms. Zelda storms up but Link fires body shots. Link stands but Zelda ROUNDHOUSES! Zelda snapmares, runs, and PENALTY KICKS! Cover, TWO! Kage is back to hit a BIG back suplex on Zelda! Kage TOSSES Zelda, scoop SLAMS Link, then runs to KNEE DROP! Cover, TWO!

Kage puts Link in a corner to CHOP! “WOO~!” Kage ROCKS Link, BOOTS Zelda from the apron, but Link CHOPS back! And CHOPS again! Kage KNEES low, ROCKS Link, then snapmares to STOMP Link right on the face! The fans are torn, but Kage hurries to BLAST Zelda off the apron again! Link is on the ropes, Kage takes aim, and he runs up! But Link avoids the Master Sword! Link ROCKS Kage, ROCKS him again, and again! But Kage throat chops Link! The fans boo, Referee Tiger Sahasrahla reprimands, but Kage runs, only for Link to AX HANDLE him down! Link whips, Kage reverses, but Link SUPERKICKS on the run!

Zelda MISSILE DROPKICKS Link! And kips up to then LARIAT Kage up and out! Zelda UPPERCUTS Link, UPPERCUTS, then runs! Link says “STOP!” Zelda doesn’t fall for it, and she blocks his kick! She spins Link, underhooks, BUTTERFLY PLEX into the ARMBAR! Link rolls around, rolls Zelda up, TWO! Zelda sunset flips, Link rolls through, jackknife bridge! TWO as they bridge up, but Kage LYNEL-SAULTS onto it!! DOUBLE COVER, TWO AS THEY BRIDGE!?! Link and Zelda spin things around, Zelda hooks the arms, Kage runs up, but Link swings things around, MASTER SWORD into Zelda!!

The fans are thunderous again, Kage dodges Link to waistlock, O’Conner Roll! TWO, Kage rebounds and DISCUS LARIATS Link inside-out! Kage hurries to hoist Link up, run at a corner and BUCKLE BOMB! Then a suplex and BRAINBUSTER!! Cover, TWO!!! “H P DUB!” “THIS IS AWESOME!” Kage hurries to bring Link up again, Electric Chair Lift! But Link slips out the back! Link full nelsons, Kage breaks free, PELE! Link wobbles, Kage aims, SUPERKICK! Cover, TWO!! The fans are still fired up as Kage drags Link into a drop zone. Kage goes up a corner, takes aim, but Zelda is up there after him! SUPER DUPER POISON-RANA!!

Unlike Link, Kage crashes down! The fans are electric as they lose their minds all over again! Zelda and Link stand up, but WHAT?! Ganon is rising from the wreckage?! Does he have his own dark aura?! Zelda and Link watch Ganon storm up to the ring, and they’re glowing now, too?! And now the championship belt?! The Triforce specifically glows with a golden light, but there’s also red, blue, and green! The colors of the Three Goddesses, Din, Nayru & Farore! The original Triforce Tournament finalists, embodying power, wisdom, and courage, and they’re all powered up with their own Glowing Aura Phenomenon!

The fans are electric as Ganon shouts, “C’MON THEN!” Ganon storms up, but into a CHOP from Link! And CHOP from Zelda! And then DOUBLE CHOP from them both! Ganon rebounds, Link and Zelda avoid double lariats! They both kick low, reel Ganon in, but he fights the double suplex! Ganon then DOUBLE SUPLEXES them! The fans boo, but Ganon YANKS Link right up off the mat! Link breaks free, ENZIGIRIS, then HOOK KICKS! Link runs, Ganon ducks the Shining Wizard, only for Link to come back with the BOOMERANG! Ganon sputters, Zelda DOUBLE STOMPS his hands! Ganon sits up from the pain, Link & Zelda DOUBLE BUZZSAW SANDWICH!

The fans fire up, but here’s the trick part like always: Who covers Ganon? While they hesitate, Kage has the chair again! Link moves Zelda aside and Kage JAMS Link up! And SMACKS him on the back! Zelda kicks Kage low, takes the chair from him, and SMACKS Kage on the back! Ganon’s outside the ring while Zelda sits the chair up. Zelda SMACKS Kage off the seat, then makes him take a seat. Zelda runs and DROPKICKS Kage down! High stack cover, but Link sunset flips Zelda! TWO and Zelda stands up holding Link’s wrists! Kage CHUCKS the chair in Zelda’s face! The fans go nuts, Kage ghost pins Link, TWO!!

Ganon CLOBBERS Kage with the title belt!! The fans boo again as Ganon then aims and CLOBBERS Link with the belt! The fans boo as loud as they can while Ganon laughs and holds the belt up overhead. The belt continues to glow as Ganon now looks longingly at it. It’s like he can see himself in it, or perhaps something more alluring. An echoey female voice asks, “What is thy desire? What is thy desire?” In fact, it might be voices! “What is thy desire?” Ganon marvels at the belt, then you can see he gets an idea. Ganon’s smile becomes a grin as he says, “I wish…!” But then Link grabs at the belt! They tug-o-war, but then Zelda joins in! And then Kage, too!

The fans fire up as these four are literally fighting over the belt! Wait, what’s going on with the auras? The red light of Din and the Triforce of Power! It’s leaving Ganon!? It’s going to Kage!?! Ganon is shocked and devastated seeing this! Ganon drops to his knees, and he even looks skinnier than he did before. He looks at himself in despair, then looks up as now Link, Zelda, and Kage stand before him, glowing with the blessings of the Triforce! The brothers each take a skinny arm, Zelda stands between them, and they all aim together on Ganon! TRIPLE LIGHT ARROWS!!! The three then look at each other, and they each put a foot on Ganon for a triple cover?! Is this even allowed?

Sahasrahla counts all the same, THREE!?! We have THREE WINNERS?!?

Winners: Link, Zelda & Kage, by pinfall

Everyone is excited but also very confused! What does this all mean?! Link, Zelda, and Kage lift up the belt, and they each take out the corresponding pieces of the Triforce! Link with courage, Zelda with Wisdom, and now Kage with power, and they connect the three to truly make the Triforce. It glows brighter than ever, and the trio throw it up into the air! It flies way up into the sky to become a giant golden firework, followed by many more fireworks! Link and Zelda hug, and Link even shakes hands with his brother. In the end, they were victorious together, sharing the glory as heroes. The future may not be clear, but it will still be bright. Happy New Year’s!

My Thoughts:

And there you have it. The series finale of HPW. I know, I know, this is all very sudden, but so was starting this story at all. It was an April Fool’s joke inspired by a conversation I was having with friends, one who passed away right at the start of the COVID era in 2020. In fact, he’s where the phrase, “Duality of Destiny,” came from when I used it during Link VS Kage a couple years ago. But five years and nine months total, so basically six years, and as much fun as I have coming up with this stuff, I always get these event articles done right against the deadline. I can’t be sure how much is procrastinating, the creative process, and idiosyncrasies resembling ADHD, but I do know it’s also from a lack of time and energy I can put into this stuff.

I already do as much as I can with covering WWE, AEW/ROH, and NJPW, where I could possibly cut the fat somewhere, I dunno. But there’s also my “day job” which isn’t exactly going well either because technology advancing is about to make transcribers obsolete, so not sure what to do about that. But my point being, I unfortunately have to give HPW up because I can’t really be sure it’s getting me or The Chairshot anywhere. I suppose there were ways to support HPW like Patreon, but I don’t know how that stuff works, and I feel like it would’ve piled more on my plate. But hey, even if HPW was 100% fictional, it’s still pro-wrestling, the end isn’t always the end. Maybe one day, we can figure out how to make HPW work again.

Until then, thank you to whoever was out there reading, I hope you enjoyed me going as all out as I could go with this last article, and I hope you continue to support The Chairshot in 2026.