Tiffany’s RAW Takes: New Season, Same Old Story

It’s is the season premiere of RAW! How will the superstars of RAW start off the new season? Come hell, highwater, and stubborn computers, Tiffany’s got some Takes!

Universal Championship

Why the fuck is Lego Head on my TV?! He’s got an undeserved, unearned title shot this week, why is he stinking up RAW too? Get him off my TV and out of WWE.

I hate that that bullshit cost us a potentially great dream match just for the sake of shock. I wanted Rey Mysterio vs Seth Rollins and I’m pretty sure most fans did too. I’m intrigued by the open challenge, but I would much rather just have Mysterio vs Rollins. I do like that Rollins promised to give Mysterio a title match when he was cleared, but I wanted it tonight.

So Rusev got himself a title match by saving Seth’s bacon from Baron Corbin and Randy Orton and showed why WWE might have been wrong to not give him a bigger push. Yeah, the only thing really over about his last gimmick was ‘Rusev Day’, and yes, the Ron Jeremy mustache is really awful, but Rusev IS a great athlete and he and Seth put on a fabulous match. Too bad Boring Bobby Lashley ruined the whole thing and it looks like the godawful Rusev/Lana/Ziggler mess of 2015 is back and probably taking the ‘Jerry Springer Trash’ storyline spot from Mike and Maria Kanellis, thank god.

Women’s Division

I’m not sure why WWE keeps having Sasha beat Alexa Bliss or Nikki Cross instead of having Women’s Tag Team championship match. The great thing about Sasha vs Alexa is that there seems to be a legit animosity between them that makes their matches really good to watch. Also, STILL loving the return of NXT’s Boss and not the watered down version we’ve had since 2015. Alex getting the short end of the stick was fun to see as was the fight between Becky and Sasha. This is one of the few HIAC matches I’m really excited for.

Ugh. Lacey Evans vs Nattie, AGAIN! When are we getting Dana Brooke vs Sarah Logan on RAW instead, it’s better than watching Evans botch everything, including the Sharpshooter.

New Season Changes

No offense to the new announce team, but I want Michael Cole, Corey Graves, and Renee Young back, please, or some situation where Renee isn’t being relegated to being an interviewer again, which is basically what her vaunted show on FS1 is or a ‘special contributor’. The woman earned her spot and it’s sad that she was only given a year to adjust when guys like Cole, Graves, and Lawler were given much more time to learn.

Crown Jewel II

Honestly, my first reaction was ‘Jesus Christ, are you serious?’. It’s no secret that Ric Flair hasn’t exactly been frugal with his money, but do we REALLY need Hogan and Flair anywhere NEAR a wrestling match in 2019? Hogan was never a great wrestler to start with and Flair hasn’t been ‘The Man’ since WCW went out of business in 2001 (yeah, I said it), and has a bunch of health issues. Anything for the almighty dollar, I guess.

That said, I’m kind of intrigued by the Team Hogan vs Team Flair thing, as long as Hogan and Flair stay well out of the match and do whatever it is broken down old wrestlers do nowadays besides griping about how much better the business was in their time before concussion protocol and drug testing.

Also, Rollins being a fanboy was cute.

AJ Styles vs Cedric Alexander

Do I even need to say how great this match was? Styles and Alexander have been having quite a rivalry for the United States Championship and it’s a lot of fun to watch. I am getting a little tired of Cedric constantly losing, it kind of makes the rivalry pointless if Cedric isn’t going to win the belt. Put the belt on him or do something else.

That’s it for Tiffany’s Takes! Tune in Wednesday for the premiere of All Elite Wrestling!