Andrew’s JCW Lunacy LIVE! Results & Ratings: Ep# 97

After the underground WrestleMania known as BloodyMania, who knows what to expect. The Lunacy leading up to BloodyMania was awesome, BloodyMania itself was insane. Painful Paul screwed the Luciano Family, Caleb Konley defended his title twice and GCW was causing issues left and right. Dani Mo also won the rights to The Outbreak, so let’s see what’s going on.

This is one of the most entertaining shows of the week. So I’m looking forward to seeing the fallout.

Ratings:

• Disco Ray vs Krule: Krule wins via Scorched Earth – SQUASH
• Shane Mercer vs James Storm vs CoKane vs Steven Flowe w/Ring Rat: Storm wins via Eye of the Storm – ** 3/4
• Italian Street Fight: Big Vito vs Painful Paul: Paul wins via Chokeslam – ** 1/2
• The Headbangers (Mosh & Thrasher) vs Willie Mack & 2 Tuff Tony: No Contest, GCW attacked – **

Results:

Violent J and Caleb are in the back arguing because Vince Russo isn’t there this week and J is pissed about GCW’s involvement. Caleb asks if J is afraid OF GCW, Paul, Willie Mack and 2 Tuff Tony surround the interaction and J says he’s afraid FOR GCW. 

The Juggalo World Order heads to the ring. They won the rights to take a member of the Luciano Family after winning GoreGames. So I guess we’ll see if they announce their pick immediately or slow roll it. Vito walks out and starts bad mouthing everyone, and acting like it was just a fix. He’s making excuses on why they lost, and J cuts him off saying he sounds pathetic. 

Vito says he called in a favor to Vince Russo, Italian Street Fight, Big Vito versus Painful Paul.  Violent J says the one they pick, is Sally Boy. Sally Boy is with the JWO for the next 30 days. Vito tells Sally Boy that he has to do it for respect and honor because it’s the right thing to do. He then tries to tell them that Sal is a good boy, and to not mess with him too much…even though he’s done nothing but deride Sally and treat him like whipping boy. 

Disco Ray vs Krule

Poor Disco Ray, it’s been a while since he lost Ring Rat and finally returned to Lunacy…and now he gon’ die. 

Ray cowers to the outside, slowly gets back in and tries to make peace with Krule saying “He Looks like a man, who likes to dance”. So Ray is trying to do the dance off, Krule seems to like the Light Up Shoes, but Ray does a Split to dodge the Lariat, hits a Disco Fever Backhand, but Krule no sells and beats Ray around, Kicks him into the steel guardrail and at least the lights are still on, on his shoes, because they might not be on behind his eyes. Krule bounces him off the guardrail, flops him onto the apron and then chucks Ray back in the ring. Krule squishes Ray in the corner twice, runs him over and Ray is on Dream Street. Scorched Earth from Krule, and yea…poor Ray.

There’s a segment in the back with the JWO teaching Sally Boy the Juggalo Code. The Headbangers walk in before Sal can get slapped, it’s the first time in roughly 9 years. Violent J was acting cool with them until they leave, then he gets serious because he’s still bitter about the hit the Headbangers put on ICP 25 years ago. 

Next segment is Vincenzo, Shane Mercer, Disco Ray and Outbreak playing Poker…Jacksyn pulls cards out of his mouth has nothing. Abel goes All In and has a Full House. Dani cuts off Vincenzo and grins that they just won. It’s funny and nice to see Outbreak trying to learn how to be people. 

GCW walks in with Brett Lauderdale and a few others saying they were personally invited by Russo. Lauderdale says they’re hear to boost the ratings…and who knows what bullshit they’re gonna pull.

Kerry Morton comes out to the ring to address the fact he got screwed out of his title shot and his Battle Royal championship last week. He said he’s not asking for sympathy, he’s just asking for people to stand behind him because he’s got balls and he’s not going anywhere. He then calls out Caleb Konley, and Caleb does actually walk out looking confident. The crowd boos Caleb, but he accepts it and revels in it. Caleb says he’s better than Kerry, and Kerry chirps back with, “Should I kiss you right on the mouth? Bend you over my knee and spank you? Or shove my size 11 up your ass right now, to see who’s the Daddy around here?” It’s funny, a little crude, but he’s actually got the crowd behind his comedy. He admits that people didn’t accept him at first, Caleb rides the fact that he’s not a Juggalo…even makes a Chris Gaines joke. Kerry says that Caleb gets on knees behind closed doors and “creates magic”. Again, he’s crude, but there’s a charm. Kerry asks for a rematch, Caleb is stringing him along. Kerry asks for only 5 minutes…not a full rematch. Caleb says, there ain’t gonna be no rematch. Vince Russo pipes in from his home. Vince likes the 5 Minute gimmick though. For the next 3 weeks Kerry will have to win in 5 minutes or he’s fired. 

Caleb walks away smug, Kerry calls him back, Caleb says “Oh you’re going into business for yourself?”, Kerry says when he wins he wants an Anything Goes Match for the title. The crowd is behind Kerry, Caleb plays along with it and says he’ll talk to Vince. 

It was a really good promo for Kerry. A little long winded, but him being like a crude babyface is perfect for the Juggalo culture. 

Sally and the JWO are in the back, Sal is crying about Vito and J says it’s not THAT bad. Willie hands Sal some Moon Mist Faygo, his hand shakes likes it’s poison until Paul tells him to fucking drink it…and Sal takes a second swig after choking. Mad Man Pondo shows up in ref gear and says he’s ready to roll. J says the Gathering was one time, but he’s got nothing else. Sal keeps drinking the Moon Mist, so he’s liking it. 

Dani is teaching Outbreak how to be normal. She says “If you wanna be normal, you have to be okay with looking stupid”. So they start doing a TikTok before The Outbreak start fighting each other and Dani has to break them up. Dani teaching Jacksyn and Abel how to be people is pretty funny/charming so far. 

Shane Mercer vs James Storm vs CoKane vs Steven Flowe w/Ring Rat

This is for Lunacy World number one contender with Caleb Konley on commentary.

The straws rain down as CoKane enters, Caleb says “Think about the turtles” on commentary and I…I popped for that. But Steven and CoKane are inside brawling, Mercer and Storm on the outside. Flowe and CoKane are just Cruiserweight counter moving each other until CoKane Snake Eyes him, Big Boot, wants the Tombstone, but Flowe slips it and Dives to the outside. Flowe takes out Storm, CoKane dives on Mercer, but Mercer plucks him out of the sky and throws CoKane into Flowe. Mercer rolls CoKane back in, X-Plex! 1-2-James Storm cuts off the pinfall. Manhattan Drop from Storm, Up and Over into a Sling Blade. Flowe attacks Storm, but Storm perches him, ole’s CoKane into Flowe. Incidental double team before Storm gets knocked off. Mercer Lariats Storm, Flowe takse off the Flannel, STAGE DIVE from Flowe! Pins CoKane, but CoKane kicks out. Near fall on Mercer, Storm looks for the Eye of Storm, but Flowe slips it to hit the Wizard on a Whale! CoKane finds his powder, grabs Flowe into the Jumping Tombstone but Mercer just Release German and Coke goes flying. Last Call Superkick rocks Mercer, Eye of the Storm hit on Steven Flowe and James Storm is number one contender!

Potentially a Storm, Morton and Caleb triple threat on the horizon? That sounds like a fun way to get Caleb to drop the belt without a direct pinfall loss. 

Italian Street Fight: Big Vito vs Painful Paul

Let’s remember…Vito asked for this. He wants a Street Fight with the 7 Foot Tall Painful Paul. Vito takes off his jacket and starts wailing on Paul before Paul just drops him and then throws out a Big Boot. Vito retreats into the crowd, Paul chases, trash cans, lids, chairs, walking around through the whole crowd back to the entrance ramp. Also Paul is a legit 7 footer, he dwarfs Dijak and Krule, and makes Vito look like a small guy, and Vito is 6’2″. A Sidewalk Slam from Paul back in the ring, only two. Stalling Jackhammer from Paul, but Vito kicks out. Paul calls for the Chokeslam and Sally Boy walks out with a Baseball bat…looking drunk. The Faygo must’ve been spiked, Vito hits a Low Blow on Paul, then Sal cracks Vito with the Baseball Bat, and Paul hits the Chokeslam.

Sal…looks…happy after hitting Vito. Maybe he’s “Not that drunk”…?

Mac finds drunk ass Sally Boy with a bottle of Faygo, mumbling in Italian. He says it was an accident…but I don’t buy it. It’s funny, he even falls off the stool. 

The Headbangers (Mosh & Thrasher) vs Willie Mack & 2 Tuff Tony

This is the Headbangers Lunacy debut, but not their JCW debut. Violent J joins commentary and Painful Paul joins Tony and Willie at ringside. 

Tony passes around his shots of Bacardi, even Mosh gets himself a friendly shot while Tony makes his rounds. This entrance can last 5-10 minutes. Hopefully Kerry doesn’t have to fight Tony during his 3 weeks, because the 5 minutes will be over before Tony is done passing out Bacardi.

Willie and Tony jump the Headbangers as the bell rings. Willie and Tony level Mosh, Tony takes him to the corner and hits the 10 Count Punches, but Mosh drops Tony to the outside with Thrasher on the outside. Quick tags and the Lifting the skirt double team, as the Bangers keep Tony eating boots. Mosh is choking Tony on the rope, rides him down and tags in Thrasher for the Wheelbarrow Tandem Leap Frog on the back. Thrasher now stays on Tony, choking him across the top and middle ropes. Headbangers keep choking Tony, the referee keeps trying to stop him. Most drops the referee, Thrasher posts the referee and now they double team Tony. Madman Pondo runs down as the new referee, giving Tony the chance to comeback but Mosh keeps Tony on his ass.

Mosh likes to show off his South Park boxers, Slam Dancing, Moshing Tony in the corner, but Tony finally moves and then hits a desperation Cutter. Simultaneous tag time bringing in Willie and Thrasher. Willie has Stinger Splashes for everyone as he’s rallying. Thrasher gets sent into Mosh, Lionsault from Tony! Six Star Frog Splash from Willie! But before he can do it, Slade gets in Painful Paul’s face, Nick Gage attacks Willie, then Otis Coger, Lauderdale, Marcus Mathers all attack the JWO. Headbangers are just watching since they’re not getting attacked. Headbangers run off GCW, Pondo got attacked too. Headbangers survey the damage, help up Willie and Tony, before showing their true colors. Stereo Short Arm Lariats from the Headbangers, and GCW start beating the hell out of the JWO. Violent J grabs a Kendo Stick and cleanrs the ring.

Overall Score: 6.5/10

This was a weird episode. While I did really like Kerry’s promo, I feel it went long. While Dani and The Outbreak are kind of funny/charming, I’m not sure if it has legs. Sally Boy possibly enjoying his time with the JWO makes sense, but with how convoluted the faction warfare is right now, I can’t say I love it. Violent J was trying to set up the Headbangers, but Russo already had it so that GCW would set up the JWO. So I understand the concept should be that JWO are the babyfaces, but when Violent J is holding a 25-30 year old grudge and then expects the Headbangers to help them out…I…fail to see the logic. Headbangers obviously could tell there was more malice behind the brawl, and didn’t take kindly to it, so they saw the shot to just pile on and not get their asses kicked, seems completely logical.

I also personally have no love for GCW. I think that’s pure trash, and their involvement in this product kills some of my personal interest. Also, the complete lack of the women’s division is something that annoys me. Alice, J-Rod and Dani are three of the best draws they have. They’re gorgeous and they can wrestle, so there’s no downside to them at all, and there always seems to be an episode once in a while that just forgets the female wrestlers are on the roster.

Its still fun enough, and the matches all had unique finishes, but seeing Caleb in back to back segments, Paul in back to back segments, Sal and JWO in most of the segments tonight. It felt really small and like a whole lot of nothing happened. But that could just be because I despise GCW…so maybe I’m just sour because they exist.