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Mitchell’s WWE NXT UK Results & Report! (4/3/19)

NXT UK rolls on towards Wrestlemania Weekend!

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NXT UK Coverage

NXT UK may be sending Dunne and Walter to New York, but the battle rages on across the pond! Will Trent Seven show Joe Coffey who’s the real dead weight?

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Kenny Williams & Amir Jordan VS Marcel Barthel & Fabian Aichner; Williams & Jordan win.
  • Kay Lee Ray VS Isla Dawn; KLR wins.
  • Trent Seven VS Joe Coffey; Coffey wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Kenny Williams & Amir Jordan VS Marcel Barthel & Fabian Aichner!

The Luckyan finally got the Bhangra Badboy to be serious about training, but now they’ll have to face a team that is no laughing matter. Will Kenny & Amir stand a chance against the European Alliance? Or will Barthel & Aichner end the fun and keep the ring sacred?

Teams sort out and we begin with Amir and Barthel. They circle as fans chant “NEIN! NEIN!” Amir and Barthel tie up and Barthel brings Amir down with a chinbar. Barthel wrenches the arm to a wristlock then a hammerlock. Amir scrambles around but Barthel keeps on him. Barthel gets the free arm and wrenches it, then SLAPS Amir on the back! Barthel grinds his knuckles and forearm in, but Amir gets up. Amir rolls through the wristlock then handsprings and breaks free to dropkick Barthel! And again! Then he dances to taunt Barthel. Barthel throat chops Amir down! Barthel drags Amir over and tags in Aichner. Aichner CHOPS Amir against the ropes then slaps him around.

Aichner snapmares but Amir handsprings through. Kenny tags in as Aichner whips Amir. Amir slides under and Kenny slingshots in. Aichner pops Kenny up and blocks the huricanrana with pure power! But Kenny slips out to a sunset flip! Aichner stays up so Kenny kicks and huricanranas Aichner out! Fans fire up as Kenny builds speed. But Amir tags in as Barthel blocks Kenny’s path. Barthel says “NEIN!” but Amir and Kenny dare him to fight. Barthel backs down, because Aichner clobbers both Kenny and Amir from behind! The Euro Alliance then throw Kenny out and mug Amir in the corner. Aichner stomps a mudhole into Amir but lets up at 4. Fans boo and jeer as Aichner boasts. Amir fights back but Aichner clubs him into the corner.

Tag to Barthel and Barthel puts Amir in a cravat. Barthel snapmares and scrapes Amir’s face! Fans boo as Barthel poses. Barthel drags Amir up for a stiff European Uppercut, then right hands in the corner! The ref backs Barthel down but Aichner gets a cheap shot in as he hangs Amir upside down! Tag to Aichner, and then the Europeans meet in the middle with dropkicks! Fans boo as both men pose with pride. Fans chant “NEIN! NEIN!” as Aichner drags Amir up. Aichner gives EuroUpper then tags in Barthel. The Europeans mug Amir with more mudhole stomps, then Barthel taunts Amir. Amir fights back with body shots but gets a big knee and elbow for it. Barthel covers, TWO!

Barthel keeps on Amir with a chinlock. Kenny gets the fans fired up as Amir endures. Amir fights his way up and out, but Barthel kicks him down. Barthel whips but Amir dodges! Barthel hits buckles so Aichner runs in. Amir dumps Aichner out and tags in Kenny! Kenny rallies on Barthel with furious forearms. Barthel shoves but Kenny hurdles to springboard back elbow! Kenny runs in corner to corner for a forearm smash on Barthel. Barthel denies the bulldog once, but not the second time! Kenny sees Aichner and missile dropkicks him away. Kenny wheelbarrows, but Barthel denies the victory roll! So Kenny shifts and hits the inverted DDT! Cover, TWO! Barthel survives but Kenny has a wild grin on his face.

Kenny fires up with Coventry as he goes after Barthel. Barthel uppercuts and puts Kenny in a corner. Kenny goes up and over but sees Aichner again. Springboard back elbow takes the Italian out! Kenny builds speed and wrecks Aichner with a dropkick. Kenny skins the cat but Barthel dropkicks him out! Amir climbs up and aims at Aichner for a leaping crossbody! But Aichner catches Amir! And drops him on the apron! The Europeans coordinate on Kenny, pop-up Spinebuster to Penalty Kick! Fans boo as Aichner & Barthel pose again. Aichner backs off while Barthel boots Amir! Barthel puts Kenny in the corner and tags Aichner. Barthel tosses Kenny at Aichner for the stalling suplex, but Kenny fights out! Kenny rolls Aichner, Kenny & Amir win!!

Winners: Kenny Williams & Amir Jordan, Williams pinning

They won!! Even Amir and Kenny are shocked! Will these underdog sensations suddenly find themselves contending for the NXT UK Tag Team Championships?

 

Backstage interview with Rhea Ripley.

The Mosh Pit Kid declared herself the most dominant female in NXT UK, but now that Piper Niven is here, will that title belong to her? “Really, Radzi? Piper Niven?” Rhea let Piper off easy in her TV debut, but NXT UK will not be a dream come true. It’ll be Piper’s living nightmare. Piper the Viper makes her debut in the ring next week, will Rhea make sure it’s ruined?

 

Backstage interview with Johnny Saint & Sid Scala.

The NXT UK head and assistant GM’s are very proud that the WWE United Kingdom Championship is being defended on TakeOver: New York. “This is a huge opportunity for NXT UK.” Sid agrees with Saint, but then Jordan Devlin comes in to conduct his own interview. Devlin wants to know how Walter can just walk in here looking like “an over-sized baby”, then just slap around a bunch of losers, to be gifted this title match while the MVP, him, the Irish Ace who pushed Dunne further than anyone, is left off? He puts the mic quite literally in Sid’s face. Sid understands how Devlin feels but the contract has been signed. The match is happening. Devlin accepts that. But know one thing: the Ace will be watching very, very closely. Will Devlin be first in line for a shot no matter what happens in New York?

 

Kay Lee Ray VS Isla Dawn!

The White Witch is proud to have more Scottish females on the roster, but the KLR doesn’t want her getting ideas of them being pals over it. Will Isla be slapped back to reality? Or will she show KLR a little magic?

The bell rings and KLR circles with Isla. They tie up and KLR gets the wristlock. She gives Isla a quick shoulder breaker then another. KLR wrenches more but Isla spins through to reverse it onto KLR. KLR spins through but misses her forearm. She bucks Isla off the waistlock, but Isla shows off her flexibility. Isla baits KLR in and rolls her up! ONE, and KLR trips Isla for a cover. ONE as Isla slips out Matrix style. Isla Oklahoma Rolls KLR, TWO! KLR gets Isla’s arms but Isla reverses. They fight over backslide control, but KLR swings Isla out for a knee to the stomach. KLR hammerlocks and throws Isla into the corner. KLR puts Isla’s arm against the ropes while fans rally.

The ref counts and KLR lets up at 4, but then comes back for a hammerlock using her legs! She brings Isla down for an armbar, then turns to twist the arm while doing push-ups! KLR makes it a cover, TWO! KLR has wristlocks and pushes Isla down but TWO as Isla nips up! Isla shows her strength but KLR kicks her low. KLR whips and trips Isla, then drags her to the apron. She spins Isla around for a stiff forearm! Fans applaud that, and then KLR drags Isla out. Isla powers out and throws KLR into the apron! Isla drags KLR up but KLR rakes her eyes. KLR still ends up back in the ring, but quickly DIVES out onto Isla! KLR puts Isla in and covers, TWO!

Isla clutches her arm but KLR is on it with a seated stretch. KLR drives her elbow in, too, but fans rally up. Isla endures and fights out, but KLR is right back on her. Isla reverses to a saido suplex! The White Witch fires up and hits a knee trigger! Cover, TWO! KLR lives but Isla keeps her focus. Isla drags KLR up to a fireman’s carry, but KLR slips out. KLR CHOPS Isla, then SUPERKICKS! Underhooks into the Gory Bomb! Cover, KLR wins!

Winner: Kay Lee Ray, by pinfall

The killer KLR continues to be successful in NXT UK with an impressive 2-0! Will she find her way to the NXT UK Women’s Championship in the near future?

 

Backstage interview with Toni Storm.

The NXT UK Women’s Champion defends her title next week against the Spoiled Princess and long time rival, Jinny. How confident is she feeling? Toni’s said all she has to say about Jinny. And here comes Jinny now! The two brawl immediately, but referees hurry to pull them apart. Jinny gets loose and decks Toni with a right! Jinny throws Toni into trunks, then promises that the title will be hers! Is the Lightning from Down Under going to recover in time for when she puts her title on the line? Or is the Spoiled Princess about to become NXT UK’s queen?

 

Travis Banks speaks.

“Ten years ago, I used to look up to people like Kassius Ohno.” Travis respected and even emulated him. But just look at Ohno now. Ohno is just bitter, but thinks he’s better? In that case, Ohno should get in the ring with the Kiwi Buzzsaw and prove it. Will the Knockout Artist accept the challenge? Or is he smart enough not to run into a buzzsaw?

 

The Grizzled Young Veterans are here!

The NXT UK Tag Team Champions are dressed for business because they have some business to address in regards to those titles. Fans taunt Zack Gibson with “If you hate Gibson, shoes off~!” but James Drake keeps Gibson focused on their business. “I am Liverpool’s Number One, Zack Gibson!” And beside him is Mr. Mayhem, James Drake. And together they are the Grizzled Young Veterans, the very first NXT UK Tag Team Champions! But as you can see, they’re not dressed to compete. The fans still taunt Drake for being “Ass Face” in his ring gear. Gibson says they’re not going to compete because Gibson is not medically cleared after Oney Lorcan damaged his ear drums. But regardless, the GYV will still be the NXT UK tag champs. And why they’re out here is because they need to address some issues Gibson has.

Gibson hears some people “slagging us off”, from NXT UK fans all over social media all the way to the NXT UK rosters and even that “dweeb” Vic Joseph. “You wanna know why we have a chip on our shoulder?” Because for YEARS, the GYV watched while promoters and fans alike always “backed the wrong talent”. They watched the old guard abandon the locker room, the flood gates open, and came in “outlaw wrestlers” and the “flippy skinny boys”. There is talent so eager to use every shortcut possible to leap frog the GYV. Fans still taunt “Ass Face”. But Gibson says the GYV weren’t going to wait any longer. That’s why they took their spot in Blackpool to become the champions!

“Oh but now, I’m hearing some more rumors.” Kenny Williams & Amir Jordan scored one lucky win, and they’re already acting like they’re contenders? How?! How are those two “divs” even contenders when they’ve barely been here five minutes? They’ve yet to endure even a fraction of what the GYV have. “The old guard may have turned their back”, but this is the new guard! The GYV run the locker room, and everyone will answer to them! Zack Gibson, James Drake, Grizzled Young Veterans, NXT UK Tag Team Champions, “SOON to be recognized” as the most important champions anywhere in the WWE. Fans boo but the message has been sent. Will Gibson & Drake establish themselves atop not only the NXT UK Tag Division, but the entirety of WWE tag team wrestling?

 

Trent Seven VS Joe Coffey!

The Man from Moustache Mountain has climbed down from the mountain to prove to the Iron King that he’s not the dead weight of his stable. Will the Seven Stars align for Trent tonight? Or will Joe just be too gallus?

The bell rings and fans are already singing for “Trent Seven Army~!” Coffey and Seven tie up and go around onto the ropes. Seven backs off but Coffey gets a headlock. Seven powers out but Coffey runs him over with a shoulder. Coffey keeps moving but Seven keeps up, only for Coffey to whip and catch Seven. Seven slips out of the toss and shoves Coffey to chop, but Coffey’s too sturdy! Seven dares Coffey to bring it, but Coffey blocks the next chop to give big body shots. Coffey whips Seven into a corner but Seven comes back with chops! Seven chops more and more, but gets Coffey with the feint for a DDT! Cover, TWO! Seven keeps on Coffey with a fast scoop slam and leg drop as fans sing. Cover, TWO!

Seven goes after the legs but Coffey kicks Seven away. Coffey bails out but Seven pursues. Seven ducks the clothesline for a full nelson but Coffey powers Seven into barriers. Coffey back suplexes Seven onto barriers! Then Coffey presses Seven backwards and shouts at the fans, “You see this, you boys?!” Coffey clubs Seven down while fans boo and jeer. He drags Seven up and into the ring, then stomps Seven in the corner. Coffey drags Seven around to the apron and bends him backwards into the post! Fans boo and the ref counts, but Coffey lets go at 4. Seven slumps out of the ring but Coffey drags him back up for a CHOP! Coffey puts Seven in the ring at the ref’s ring count of 5, then covers, TWO! Seven has life but Coffey puts him in a half nelson.

Fans rally up as Seven endures but Coffey drives in a knee. Seven still holds on and fires up. Seven throws body shots and breaks free, but his bad back keeps him down. Coffey paces before he drags Seven up for a bearhug. Coffey squeezes the bad back but Seven fights with elbows and forearms. Seven SLAPS Coffey but Coffey squeezes tighter. Coffey then shoves and belly2belly suplexes Seven over head! Seven crawls to a corner while fans sing again. Coffey runs in corner to corner but Seven dodges! But Coffey comes back around for forearms and a waistlock takedown. Coffey stomps, drops knees and even a leaping elbow! Seven crawls and Coffey takes aim, but again Seven dodges! Seven back drops Coffey, then runs in for a CHOP! And more CHOPS! Seven reels Coffey in, snap Dragon Suplex!

But Seven doesn’t stop, adrenaline helps him hit a suplex to side slam! Cover, TWO! Coffey is up but Seven is running, to clothesline Coffey out hard! Seven keeps moving, and DIVES! Fans are thunderous for Seven as he drags Coffey back up and in. Seven climbs back in then climbs up top. Phoenix Senton flops! Seven gets up and narrowly dodges one clothesline, but not the other! Then another! Cover, TWO!! Seven survives both the northern and sourthern clotheslines, but Coffey deadlifts Seven for a German suplex! Coffey keeps moving to POUNCE Seven into buckles! Coffey still isn’t done, powerbomb and high stack, TWO!! Fans cheer for “Moustache Mountain!” while Seven and Coffey stir.

Coffey stands first and brings Seven around. Seven resists the bomb, then trips Coffey up for a Figure Four! Coffey endures and punches at the legs, then drags himself towards ropes. Seven slaps Coffey’s legs but Coffey hits back. Coffey reaches as Seven hammers away, ropebreak! Seven lets go of Coffey at 4, with help from the ref, and both men end up crawling to the apron. Coffey taunts Seven while fans rally up. Seven and Coffey both stand up and start throwing hands and CHOPS! Seven’s back bothers him but he still comes back with a chop. Coffey throws more hands, then wants another belly2belly but Seven ear claps out. Coffey kicks low and wants another bomb, but Seven back drops Coffey to the floor! Seven himself slumps down while Coffey writhes.

Both men clutch their backs while the ring count begins. The count reaches 5 before either man stands. Seven is up first and drags Coffey up. Seven puts Coffey in at 8, but he barely gets in, at 9.5! Coffey crawls after Seven and says this is still his kingdom. But Seven starts bobbing and weaving, and he CHOPS Coffey into the wristlock. Coffey boots the Seven Stars away but Seven dodges All the Best for the Bells! Seven runs into a pop-up EuroUpper! Coffey keeps Seven up, hops up, and leaps, only to flop! Seven runs, big lariat! But he’s not done there, swing out for THE Seven Star Lariat!! Cover, TWO!? Coffey survives and Seven can’t believe it! Coventry agrees, “That was Three! That was Three!”

Seven drags himself up while fans rally again. Seven grits his teeth as he fires up. Coffey stands and Seven goes for the torture rack. But his back gives out! Coffey capitalizes with another powerbomb! High stack, TWO, but into the Boston Crab! Seven shouts, flails and reaches, but Coffey pulls him away from the ropes! Coffey sits down deep, Seven crawls, and fans give him power, but Coffey drags him away again! Seven taps, Coffey wins!

Winner: Joe Coffey, by submission

The Iron King wins, but there’s no way Seven is the weak link of British Strong Style. Either way, Coffey gets himself back on track, but will this be enough to contend for the WWE UK Championship again?

 

NXT UK takes one last look at the road to Dunne VS Walter.

“Since May of 2017, at TakeOver: Chicago, one thing has remained the same.” Pete Dunne has been the champion. The Bruiserweight won again and again, against star after star, for a historic 685 days as WWE UK Champion. But then on January 12th, 2019, NXT UK TakeOver: Blackpool, a new challenger appeared: The Ring General, the Austrian Anomaly, WALTER! The Bruiserweight wasn’t afraid, but everyone from Progress to wXw to just about anywhere in Europe knew what Walter was capable. So to prove he wasn’t afraid, Dunne demanded Walter be his opponent in New York.

Dunne looks to face his toughest challenger yet, but he vows that the title is and always will be his. But then Walter did the most shocking thing ever: he spoke! He told Dunne in both Austrian and English that Dunne’s time is up, and that era will end. Walter vows to make that title and all of NXT UK his, but what will it take to take over in New York?

 


 

My Thoughts:

NXT UK finds itself in a unique place as far as a go-home goes. The ending package for the title match was great, it really catches fans up if they missed anything, especially last week’s contract signing that was basically the real go-home segment. Again, pretty sure Walter wins because that’d make Dunne way too powerful. But that aside, this was just a great episode with great action and story build anyway. Williams & Jordan VS Aichner & Barthel was a great match, and it was great for Williams & Jordan to win. It really builds up the card to have another Face tag team to move up while Moustache Mountain is apparently taking it easy right now. The Grizzled Young Veterans, or rather Gibson, had another great promo that pointed out Williams & Jordan, so maybe that’s the match at the next UK exclusive TakeOver.

KLR VS Isla was a good match, and naturally KLR wins because she just got here and needs to be built up a bit. She and Isla might not be done, but KLR can definitely move into position as a title contender regardless if she’s Face or Heel. Piper’s debut match next week will surely be a success, unless Rhea Ripley interferes or distracts. Rhea VS Piper is going to be fun, and I’m thinking Piper wins out. Toni VS Jinny is next week, too, giving us plenty of reason to watch the post-Mania/TakeOver episode. I would think with how Jinny stood tall in that brawl, Toni wins. It’d be good for Toni to win, too, because her run has still only just begun. Toni can then be the one for fresh match-ups with KLR and Piper and others still waiting for their shot.

Speaking of wanting title shots, Devlin definitely looks primed for his shot after TakeOver. Devlin VS Walter in Progress was apparently incredible, so I’d love to see a rematch of that in NXT UK. Now while Progress Devlin won, I’m not sure NXT UK Devlin wins, but it’d still be great to see. Seven VS Coffey was a great match for the main event, and clearly Seven is over with the fans. But that’s what made Coffey winning even bigger, because he’s the one who needs to stay afloat. Coffey VS Walter would be great, too, but that would definitely be for Walter to get a successful defense under his belt. Win or lose, Dunne VS Walter is going to be incredible, and should hopefully get fans only watching NXT America curious about NXT UK.

My Score: 8.5/10

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast 

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

Classic POD is WAR


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Coverage

Mitchell’s ROH Results & Report! (4/18/25)

ROH says TGIF!

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420 Honor Club!

Can’t go wrong with ROH on a Friday afternoon! But will Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs still be World Six Man Tag Champions after facing #MXMTV?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bandido & Komander w/ Alex Abrahantes VS The Infantry w/ Shane Taylor Promotions; win(s).
  • Sammy Guevara VS Lee Johnson w/ Blake Christian; wins.
  • The Frat House VS ???
  • Evil Uno & Alex Reynolds VS Jon Cruz & Rosario Grillo; win.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championships: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS Johnny TV & MXM Collection; win and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast 

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

Classic POD is WAR


Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

All Shows On Demand


Powered by RedCircle


Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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Coverage

Andrew’s TNA iMAPCT! & Unbreakable Results & Match Ratings: 4.17.2025

iMPACT is the Pre-Show, Unbreakable is a TNA+ Special! See what happened!

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iMPACT! is getting the old Heat treatment as a TV episode pre-show. While nothing about the iMPACT episode seems overly intriguing, they all actually have narrative weight, and since the last two weeks have been devoid of weight and general cohesion…this might be a surprisingly good episode which would serve as a better pre-show than expected.

I’m still mad that it’s a damn Thursday and they want to have 4-5 hours of show because WrestleMania reasons. Even WWE realized doing long shows before workdays was stupid, so NJPW giving them the idea to break Mania into two nights is a boon for everyone over thirty.

Also the main reason I’m doing a joint article. Since Unbreakable starts immediately after iMPACT, I’m not gonna put up back to back articles. One stop shoppin it!

iMPACT! – Ratings:

  • Laredo vs Jason Hotch w/Tasha Steelz: Laredo wins via Laredo Fly – ** 1/4
  • Jazmyn Nyxx w/Fatal Influence vs Xia Brookside w/Lei Ying Lee: Xia wins via Small Package – **
  • KC Navarro vs Cody Deaner: KC wins via Loaded Fist – **
  • Maggie Lee & Heather by Elegance w/Personal Concierge vs Gigi Dolin & Tatum Paxley: Hot Topic Hotties win via Cemetery Drive – ** 1/4
  • Jakara Jackson w/Lash Legend vs Dani Luna w/Jody Threat: Dani wins via Luna Landing – ** 1/4
  • Leon Slater vs Brian Myers: Myers wins via Roster Cut – ** 1/2

 

Unbreakable – Quick Ratings:

  • Zachary Wentz vs Eric Young vs AJ Francis: Young wins via Piledriver – *** 1/4
  • Ace Austin vs Steve Maclin vs Eddie Edwards w/Alisha: Steve Maclin wins via KIA – *** 1/2
  • X Division Championship: Moose(c) w/Alisha vs Akeem: Moose wins via Lights Out – Long Squash
  • Mustafa Ali & Nemeths vs Hardys & Mike Santana: Jeff Hardy wins via Swanton Bomb – ***
  • Kaz & Tessa vs Joe Hendry & Masha: Hendry wins via Standing Ovation – ** 3/4
  • Barb Wire Massacre: Sami Callihan vs Mance Warner w/Steph De Lander: Callihan wins via Cactus Driver ’97 – ** 1/2
  • Inaugural International Championship: AJ Francis vs Steve Maclin vs Eric You: Maclin wins via K.I.A. – *** – TITLE CHANGE!!!

 

Results:

Laredo vs Jason Hotch w/Tasha Steelz

Laredo starts quick with a Straight Right, Tijeras, a few quick strikes, kicks Hotch out of the ring, wants a Plancha, but Tasha gets in the way to stop Laredo’s offense which gives Hotch an opening. Quick trip, a few chops and a hard Irish Whip has Laredo trying to catch his breath. Hotch tries to go for another Strong Irish Whip but Laredo reverses, two kicks, Flying Neckbreaker into a Missile Dropkick sending Hotch to the outside. Laredo finally pulls off his Suicida, and he’s rolling. Corner Forearm, Uno Mass Corkscrew Moonsaults, but Hotch manages to get away after two. A Snap Jab staggers Laredo, Ali style Outside In Rolling Neckbreaker and Hotch tries to take things to the top. But Laredo counters and Avalanche Michinoku Driver…only for two.

Laredo tries to keep things going, Back Handspring Crossbody, but Hotch catches him, big Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker for two. Hotch looks to the corner and then gets scared because he thinks Santana might strike, Hotch and Tasha argue, Laredo recovers and runs up the corner and hits the Laredo Fly for the win.

Jazmyn Nyx w/Fatal Influence vs Xia Brookside w/Lei Ying Lee

Jazmyn and Xia go for a chain wrestling or World of Sport kind of start. Xia even gets out of the Head Scissors with the classic Hand Stand and pop. After a little taunting, Jazmyn tries to charge but Xia loops around for a flash Cradle, Nyx kicks out quick and retreats to her Fatal Influence friends for a breather. Xia catches her with a Dropkick, a few strikes and starts putting things together until Jazmyn catches her in the corner and Snake Eyes Xia the hard way and then starts leaning her into the ropes, a few Leg Sweeps, PK kicks and Jazmyn is in control. Fisherman’s Suplex Hold from Jazmyn but Xia kicks at two. She tries to fight back up but Jazmyn is using her positioning to keep control. Bulldog into the middle buckle, puts Xia between the ropes and lays in a Round Kick to her chest and Xia has been eating offense for the last few minutes. The crowd tries to rally the little British Angel, but Jazmyn lays in some forearms, hits the ropes, Xia ducks and they hit stereo High Kicks to double down for a few moments.

Xia starts to rally, gets a few shots in, Tijeras, Xia tries Angel Wings but Jazmyn moves. Jazmyn tries to stay on her, but a Jawbreaker gives Xia time to go to the corner, Xia hits the Crossbody, Angel Wings, and looks for a DDT or something but Fatal Influence get involved distracting everyone. Lei has Fallon hanled, but Jacy is mouthing off causing Rosemary to come down and make a Mist save. Jazmyn tries to be opportunistic, but Xia blocks her move and hits the Small Package for the win.

Overbooked and timing was a bit shoddy in some spots, but not offensive. Not bad, but not good either. 

KC Navarro vs Cody Deaner

This is for a spot in the Ultimate X match. Here’s to hoping the Blessed One beats the hell out of the loser who’s about as over as Herpes. Meaning he never goes away, and he’s unlikable. Anyone that says “Funny Underdogs are needed on shows”, isn’t that like 60% of the roster? No one is funny if everyone tries to be funny. KC however, he’s fucking hilarious and amazing.

KC tries to pay off Deaner and get him to forfeit, Deaner of course does the underdog thing of fighting back, dumb looking punches, goofball corner spot that he lengthens to the put of looking dumb and not funny. Oh thank God KC hits the Spiderman in the ropes, ducks Deaner and 305 gets hit for a near fall. Now KC is rolling, nice quick offense, Snapmare, Front Roll Neck Snap, Stomp into Split into cover for only two. Deaner goes for the comeback, and a few Lariats, Bulldog, and everything looks soo stupid. Deaner puts KC in the Airplane spin, gets dizzy and then goes again, TKO for two.

Navarro tries to powder, Deaner goes after him but the ref gets Deaner off of him since KC was in the ropes, KC wraps his necklace around his knuckles and a quick Jab to the face as Deaner tries to suplex him, 1-2-3, Blessed WIN.

If Deaner was the only doofus guy he’d be fine, but when we have Santino, Arianna, Laredo, KC, Great Hands, Brian Myers, Dango, Alisha, Hendry (while not a doofus isn’t close to serious), Kaz, Elegance Brand (all 3 of them), Ryan Nemeth and those are just off the top of my head. Everyone can’t be silly or no one is silly and nothing matters.

Maggie Lee & Heather by Elegance w/Personal Concierge vs Gigi Dolin & Tatum Paxley

I’m gonna keep any Gigi drooling to a minimum since I respect my boy Wentz, but I will say, you gotta love Hot Topic Hotties. Yes I like walking red flags, I’m self aware, and okay with it.

Maggie and Gigi start, a  few quick counters, Gigi manages the Double Hook Cradle for two, then Hot Topic Hotties go tandem with a Dropkick and a Twisting Elbow for another two. Tatum is officially legal, Maggie looks for the tag but Heather wants to push Maggie more. Which is exactly how ASH treated her. Tatum turns it around, Gigi tags in, Poetry Bronco, and then Kawada Kicks from Gigi. Concierge distracts, Maggie grabs her, Heather takes the cheap shot, Suplex from Maggie for two. Heather and Maggie get some offense in together, and Heather is working Gigi over in the heel corner. Unicorn Stampede essentially. Heather goes for a pinfall and its only 2. Heather is getting frustrated, Gigi with an Upkick headscissors, Heather tries to stop the tag out, but eats the Mule Kick.

Tatum starts beating on Heather, rams Heather into Maggie, Cartwheel Peach Sunrise, tags in Gigi, Double Headbutts and Cemetery Drive from the Hot Topic Hotties and everyone wins. Jesus…will never leave this chat, he started it.

Jakara Jackson w/Lash Legend vs Dani Luna w/Jody Threat

Things start a little slow, Collar & Elbow tie up that they won’t relent for a while, Jakara tries to turn it into a Headlock Takeover, but Dani is too strong. Dani gets a few shots in, hops the rope for something but Lash makes her present felt and trips Dani while Jakara distracts the referee. The referee didn’t see anything but ejects Lash anyway. Lash won’t go, tries to intimidate the ref and say no. Jakara keeps things moving against Dani while Lash takes her sweet time slowly walking away. Jakara tries a Roll-Up but Dani too thicc to keep down. Dani fights back up, scoops Jakara and drops her unceremoniously.

Jakara starts laying in a bunch of Falling Knees and gets a quick two, before locking in a Cravat that Dani tries to fight out of. Dani counters out of it, ducks the Line, and they crash into each other with Forearms. The Double Fall Down spot is a little played out and this is only the pre-show really.

Dani levels Jakara with a few Lariats, looks for the Luna Landing, Jakara slips it so Dani comes off the ropes with a Busaiku Knee. Luna wants a Blue Thunder but Jakara gets away until Luna grabs her again for the Rebound Blue Thunder Bomb and a near fall. Luna charges the corner, misses, Jakara hits the Tornado DDT, but only two. Jakara tries to ram Dani’s head into the buckles, but Luna blocks, fires and takes Jakara’s head off, Luna Landing gets his and Dani wins!

Elijah has a promo segment and they have a really Sesame Street style “Walk this Way” words on the screen thing. When they did the bouncing ball lyrics with Ron Killings, it was at least cool. This comes off as corny and low budget public broadcasting crap just for Elijah to announce an open challenge at Rebellion or something. Admittedly I zoned out cause I figured it would be nothing of note.

Leon Slater vs Brian Myers

Myers and Slater start in a shoving match jawing at each other, and then Leon lays in a Shoulder Tackle off the ropes, some jumping crap and Myers is getting bounced from corner to corner like a dork. Leon tries to continue the Around the World but a punch, Thrust Kick and Irish Whip across the ring gives him some confidence, but he eats the Feint Mule Kick, Back Handspring Back Elbow…and again System matches are “look stupid and get beat up for 70% of the match until a shortcut can be taken”. Speaking of short cuts, Leon goes for his Corner Leap, Myers guards from it, Leon repositions but gets tripped and eats a Spear. Then…we go to commercial.

Coming out of the commercials Myers is still in control. Leon slips out of a suplex and then connects with a flurry of offense, Myers eats more kicks than I can count, powders, Leon does his corner post leap, comes in and looks to win but an Implant DDT, dick kick and Roster Cut gives Myers the win.

Overall  iMPACT! Rating: 5/10

Nothing special but at least it made some sense and was a better than the last few episodes. Low bar comparatively. Now immediately onto Unbreakable! So because this is a long night, I figured I’d do a Watch A Long with Mat Sarpraicone over on Dirt Sheet Radio because I have zero faith in Unbreakable being worth the 2-3 hours it will take to watch it.

So you’ll get quick results with ratings and an overall thoughts at the end of Unbreakable from me, because it’s late and I needed something to keep me awake.

Overall Unbreakable Rating: 4.5/10

The iMPACT! episode was easier to watch and digest, three Triple Threats is too many and the Main Event being a slow paced triple threat after a Barb Wire match and a bunch of faster matches really doesn’t resonate well with fans. Even though I didn’t love the Sami vs Mance match, ending on carnage and the “babyface” winning would’ve been a much better way to send the crowd home happy and we wouldn’t have needed so much time fill during the last hour of the show.

Maclin being the inaugural International Champion is cool, setting up the first defense against Eric Young is good for their story, so most of the marks were hit. It just was too damn slow and had no business being a main event. Champions vs Challengers was okay, but it only really picked up when Masha and Tessa were mixing it up. I liked Moose having the extended squash match for shits and giggles, but two Triples back to back to open the show is an easy way to burn out a crowd. Sure the Moose match was an extended piss break to recharge the crowd, but the card was just laid out awkwardly and things felt like far more of a chore than they should have.

All in all this was a very lame event. Yes I get it was purely stop gap to take advantage of WrestleMania weekend, but with Rebellion next week, we all knew it wasn’t gonna shake things up too much. But hot damn was I about to fall asleep if I wasn’t doing the watch-a-long to not pass out.

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