Entertainment

Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News! (5/5/20)

The Dark Forces respond!

Published

5 years ago

May 5, 2020

Steven Mitchell

Hyrule Puro-Resu stars have been busy on social media!

There has been so much going on in HPW, and so much to say! The Dark Forces respond to the Goddess Championship news! Plus, we hear from the Hero of Hyrule!

Cia and The Dark Forces have posted a video.

The Black Sorceress sits on an ornate armchair with her “generals,” Scorching Berserker Volga and Wizzro the Twisted Wizard, on either side of her. She caresses her scepter while frowning. “Zelda, Zelda, Zelda. That’s all I ever hear. Oh, Zelda, the Princess of Hyrule! Zelda, the daughter of Nick Foolyear! Zelda the spoiled brat who gets everything she wants!” Cia is sick and tired of Zelda getting praise and opportunities she doesn’t deserve! Zelda lied to everyone to get into the Triforce Tournament. Isn’t lying a bad thing? But her punishment is barely anything! Zelda is still in this contender’s match! If any other female wrestler did that, would they be “punished” with an alternate title opportunity? Cia doubts that.

“But it’s fine.” Cia will just beat Zelda again. And she doesn’t care what the adjusted record says, or what the schedule overlap was. To Cia, there are no excuses of “But she was Sheik~! She had another match~!” A great wrestler is a great wrestler and a loss is a loss. “And Zelda is going to lose again, because <i>that</i> is what that brat deserves!” Strong words, but will Cia back them up? Or will she be forced to eat them in the ring?

Triforce Champion, Link, is visiting Kakariko Village.

The Hero of Hyrule is in his hometown for a photoshoot with HPW Media. He poses with the title in front of his old high school, and shakes hands with fans among the students and staff. The principal proudly shows Link that he is now in the Kakariko Alumni Hall of Fame. Link is flattered, and a little embarrassed, as he poses for more pictures alongside his yearbook photos.

“Oi, Link! Link!” Groose walks over as Link heads to his car. He was looking all over town for his “old pal,” but never thought he’d be at a school. Groose then notices the cameras, and says HPW should get a shot of the two champions together. Link reluctantly agrees, and the two stand side by side, resting their respective title belts on their shoulders. Groose compliments Link on the nice suit and car. Well, the suit is nicer than the car, actually. Groose didn’t even think Link had a car. Or that he knew how to drive. But that’s besides the point. Groose says he wanted to check in with his old training partner, see how he was doing. Link starts to say they weren’t training partners, but Groose cuts him off by saying they should train together again some time. Groose has to get ready for his match with Ghirahim Mazokucho, and Link needs to stay sharp while waiting for a challenger.

Link starts to say something but Groose gives him a pat on the back. Groose is confident the two of them will be fine, though. Groose will beat down that “tongue flicking weirdo” and Link will be ready for either Ganondorf or Igos du Ikana. Right? Of course Groose is right. Now how about more pictures? Groose gives Link another hard pat on the back, and then holds his Death Mountain Championship up in the air. Link reluctantly does the same with his belt, and has perhaps been roped into something by the gung-ho Groose. Will training with Triforce Champion help Groose prepare for his first title defense?

My Thoughts:

Okay, similarly to my previous Hyrule Puro-Resu article, there was going to be more news pretty quickly. But also, I realized I wasn’t giving enough attention to Link. He needed to have a segment of some kind so that he wouldn’t be a completely absent champion. We’ve gotten that enough from the WWE finding ways to go back to Brock Lesnar. At the same time, I realized having Link as a pro-wrestler at all is tough, because he doesn’t really speak in the official games. His dialogue in the original April Fools’ article was based off the infamous Philips CDI games and for laughs, but how could he be a serious character? The easy solution was obviously what you just read in having Groose take care of the talking, even if it meant interrupting Link. But I don’t I’ll make another article like this before June, I’m going to be too focused on writing those three matches.

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)

THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

Classic POD is WAR

Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

All Shows On Demand

Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!

Up Next

Greg DeMarco Show with The Lovely & Talented Mrs. DeMarco!

Don't Miss

Bandwagon Nerds #25: A Marathon, Not A Sprint (5/5/2020)

Bandwagon Nerds

Bandwagon Nerds #290: Norm!

The Nerds recap trailers for Jurassic Park: Rebirth and Welcome to Derry, discuss delays to Avengers movies, and pay their respects to George Wendt,

Published

7 days ago

May 26, 2025

PC Tunney

This week, the Bandwagon is stripped to the core as Dave and Tunney guide you through the week around the Nerdosphere. A visit to the Trailer Park highlights anticipated hits such as Jurassic World: Rebirth, Welcome to Derry, Zootopia 2, and Predator: Killer of Killers. Is a Street Fighter movie in the works, and will Jason Momoa and Roman Reigns be in it? Sesame Street finds a new home on Netflix, plus Disney has delayed Avengers: Doomsday and Avengers: Secret Wars by about 7 months. Is there reason to be concerned, or is this all part of a bigger plan? Plus, Dave & Tunney pay their respects to George Wendt and show love to the lasting legacy of Norm Peterson and Cheers in general.

@AttitudeAgg
@WrestlngRealist
@itsReyCash
@PCTunney
@itsmedpp
@ViolentAesop
@TheMindlessPod
@therealcplatt
@ChairshotMedia
@BandwagonNerds

PROWRESTLINGTEES.COM/TheChairshot – Makes a GREAT GIFT!!!

About Bandwagon Nerds

Join Patrick O’Dowd, David Ungar, PC Tunney, Rey Cash, and DPP as they keep everyone up on all things nerd and maybe add some new nerds along the way. It’s the Bandwagon Nerds Podcast!

About Chairshot Radio Network

Chairshot Radio Network

MONDAY – Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY – 4 Corners Podcast (sports)

WEDNESDAY – The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)

THURSDAY – POD is WAR

FRIDAY – DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY – The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY – Keeping the news ridiculous… The Oddity / The Front and Center Sports Podcast

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE’s PPV/PLE history)

http://TheChairshot.com PRESENTS…IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O’Dowd’s 5X5

Chairshot Radio Network
Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts… Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

All Shows On Demand

Listen on your favorite platform!

iTunes | iHeart Radio | Google Play | Spotify
Listen, like, subscribe, and share!

Bandwagon Nerds

About Chairshot Radio Network

MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)

THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

Classic POD is WAR

Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

All Shows On Demand

Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!

Entertainment

Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News Report! (5/23/25)

What’s with all the glowing?

Published

1 week ago

May 23, 2025

Steven Mitchell

HPW Investigates: The Glowing Aura Phenomenon…

Riju, Sidon, Thunderbird, Donny B. Kool, Yunobo. Five stars of HPW have had powerful performances, but there’s something more to it… What is the reason behind this modern mystery? And could there be another?

Reviewing the timeline of events…

March 21st, the Triforce Tournament Bracket Finals

As the Gerudo Sisterhood was settling its grudge, Riju fought as hard as she could as the massive underdog against the Dame of the Dunes. Riju would survive heavy impact, begin to glow as she made her comeback, but Shabonne made sure she would lose the match. On that same night, we would see Sidon and Thunderbird each have their own moment where, after surviving heavy damage, they would begin to glow and make their comebacks. From there, Sidon and Thunderbird would win their way into the Triforce Tournament Finals at the Triforce Annivesary show.

April 1st, The Triforce Anniversary

Not only would we see Sidon & Thunderbird each bring out that same glowing energy, but Donny B. Kool would bring out that same phenomenon during the 21 Person Battle Royal. Donny held his own, but with that many opponents, winning was unlikely, and he was eliminated fifth-to-last.

May 1st, Wrestling Is Life

Yunobo won that 21 Person Battle Royal in April, and made his challenge for the HPW Death Mountain Championship. Igos du Ikana was as sharp as ever, but both men pushed each other to their limits. Yunobo powered through submissions and sharp strikes, bringing about the glowing aura, but Igos still won the match and retained the title.

So what might this all mean?

Five stars have been seen with glowing auras during the emotional heights of these matches. Or perhaps, the glowing auras are the results of these emotional heights? Could they be brought about by the “fighting spirit” within each one and in turn bring out new strength and energy? Each one of the five certainly seemed to “dig down deep” and fight like they were rising above mortal expectations.

Another detail that must be considered is the number of people who have presented this glowing aura phenomenon. Five people, with no connections between them: Riju the Gerudo; Sidon the Zora; Thunderbird the Ruto; Donny B. Kool the Gero; and Yunobo the Goron. Granted, they’re all young, and certainly leading this new generation forward. But the number itself is a point of focus. Needless to say that in Hyrule, three is the magic number, originating with the Triforce of legend. Therefore, multiples of three are also important. Five recorded phenomena, could this be a breaking of the norm? Or could there be a sixth?

Images flash on screen of the many faces on the HPW roster. Who could it be that enters the GAP?