Coverage
Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (10/10/22)
Are you ready?
No, no, I said… ARE! YOU! READYYYY!?
It’s the Raw Season Premiere, and WWE celebrates 25 YEARS of Degeneration X! Plus, The Tribal Chief leads his Bloodline as he prepares to SMASH Logan Paul at Crown Jewel!
OFFICIAL RESULTS
- Johnny Gargano VS Austin Theory; Gargano wins.
- Rey Mysterio VS Chad Gable w/ Otis; Rey wins.
- Bayley VS Candice LeRae; Candice wins.
- 2v1 Handicap: Omos w/ MVP VS Robert Adams & Joseph Torres; Omos wins.
- WWE United States Championship: Bobby Lashley VS Seth Rollins; Rollins wins and becomes the new WWE United States Champion.
- Sami Zayn w/ The Usos VS Matt Riddle; Riddle wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
Degeneration X talks backstage.
HBK is with Road Dogg and X-Pac, and he asks them, “Are you ready?” Road Dogg is ready, is X-Pac ready? Yeah, X-Pac is ready. But the big question, is HHH ready? Oh, whoa, hold on. He gets off gorilla and says this isn’t just their 25th anniversary, but the season premiere of Raw. They can’t do their stuff anymore, this is about the sponsors and the business. They can go have fun, but no cussing, no genital jokes- PENIS! Can they say that? That’s what HHH means! Yeah, wtf, man? Bro! C’mon! HBK says HHH knows how this is gonna go. Sh*t’s gonna go down, it’s gonna get effin crazy! Enjoy it right the F now! Alright, alright! Just don’t F up.
HBK says he sees four cocks! They’re just chickens. HHH says we can’t do that anymore! Who put those there? Just grab a cock and- Nevermind, let’s go. Hey! No fighting! Damn it. HHH stops choking the chicken as he slams it, but will DX be okay without him out there with them?
The Bloodline is here!
To be fair, they were here last week. But this time, because it’s the Raw Season Premiere, they’re led by the Tribal Chief, the Head of the Table, the Undisputed WWE Universal Heavyweight Champion, Roman Reigns! Roman and the Usos hold up the belts for the pyro and then the Bloodline continues to the ring. They then set up again, lifting the belts for the second round of pyro. Sami Zayn jams out to the theme song as Paul Heyman gets the mic. Fans boo Roman then chant for the Honorary Uce, but Heyman hands the mic to Roman. “Brooklyn, New York! ACKNOWLEDGE ME!” Fans do indeed cheer, but there are still some boos.
Roman says when the fans respond like that, he can’t lie, he has to be honest. Roman likes moving forward. When you’re the Greatest Of All Time, he’s looking to next week, he doesn’t live in the past. But Roman can’t get past last Friday for some reason. That brings Roman to something his father taught him a long time ago. Roman was taught “that the loudest in the room is also the weakest in the room.” So in his mind, if you’re the weakest, and you’re part of The Bloodline, then you’re just a fool. “Jey. Are you a fool?” Roman looks at Jey, who did shoot his mouth off at Logan Paul last week. Roman says they’ve done this a few times already, but-
Sami Zayn steps in! He hates to interrupt but… Heyman is furious! How can Sami interrupt the Tribal Chief?! But the fans are fired up, and Roman has Heyman stand down. Heyman apologizes and Sami continues. “It’s just that on Friday, you said that Jey Uso wasn’t your problem anymore, but that he’s my problem now. So as maybe the Honorary Uce, I’d love the opportunity to handle this whole situation.” Roman considers it, and smiles. Sami really is the Honorary Uce! He’s all yours, Sami, go ahead. Well okay! Roman steps aside and fans cheer Sami on as he looks at Jey. Here’s the thing, buddy. First off, we all love you. This is your family.
But the Tribal Chief and Sami were talking the other night, spit-balling about the future direction of the Bloodline, just some ideas. A really good talk, too, actually. They got into some personal stuff, Sami feels they connected. But anyway, that’s not important. The thing is, they feel Jey’s behavior lately, “Just hasn’t been very Uce-y.” What? Fans chant, “UCEY! UCEY!” Sami wants Jey to hear him out. Take a look around! Look at Jimmy! Who doesn’t love Jimmy? Fans cheer as Sami and Jimmy do the handshake! Look at that smile! And Solo! Look at him! Fans cheer for the Enforcer. He’s built like a brickhouse, looks all serious, but we all know he’s cool.
Sami says that’s kinda what he’s getting at. We’re all pretty cool, actually. So they just need Jey “to be cool.” Can he be cool? Jey looks at Roman and Roman says, “Don’t look at me.” But Jey still address Roman, “This is a joke, right?” Is this a rib? They’re family, Uce. Ain’t no way they can let Sami come here and tell Jey what to do! Sami says he hates to be this guy, but- “Bro…” Matt Riddle is headed out here? Riddle has a mic to say, “Why you guys talking about last Friday? You guys should be talking about this past Saturday, when I not only beat Seth Rollins, I tapped him out in the Fight Pit, bro!”
And Roman, Riddle knows he got beat before and there’s that stipulation where he can’t challenge for the title, but c’mon! One more time for New York! Let’s go! Brooklyn likes the sound of that! “BRO! BRO! BRO!” Roman and Heyman talk it over but Riddle says the people want it. Roman asks, “Brooklyn, should we give him one more chance tonight?” “YES!” Roman says, “Nah…!” A deal is a deal, bro! Get to the back of the line and stay there! Well then, if Roman’s not gonna step up to the plate, maybe one of his Bloodline bros will! Fans cheer for Sami here, and Jey agrees! Step up, Honorary Uce! Ain’t he the number 2 now? Step up! YEET!
Sami says yeah, yeet. He’ll yeet, dawg. Sami tells Riddle, “What is this? Do you think you’re funny or something?” “YEET.” Well okay, haha. But let’s explain something to Riddle. Riddle doesn’t say “Yeet.” THEY say YEET! YEET IS BLOODLINE! That’s their thing! Solo, Jey, Jimmy, Roman, uh… Yes, Heyman, too! And Sami! They can say YEET, but Sami doesn’t wanna hear Riddle ever say it again! Got it? Fans chant “YEET! YEET!” and Riddle says, “YEET.” Jey says that’s disrespect! What’s Sami gonna do? Is he gonna handle business? YES! He will! Sami says if Riddle wants ot run his mouth, then they can go 1v1 here tonight! Fans like the sound of that!
So what’s the tough guy gotta say about that?! “I accept. YEET!” Riddle still gets a fight with The Bloodline, but not quite the one he wanted. Will Riddle keep the momentum going from Extreme Rules? Or will the Honorary Uce handle his business and kick Riddle to the back of the back of the line?
Johnny Gargano VS Austin Theory!
Johnny Wrestling once showed the “Real Superstar” the way in the WWE, but the influence of a certain chairman inflated the ego of the now Youngest Mr. Money in the Bank Ever. Will Gargano humble his former protégé and once again show him the way? Or will the student become the master?
The bell rings and Theory rushes in to fireman’s carry! Gargano slips off and shows Superkick, which makes Theory fall back! Gargano rains down fists on Theory, Theory fights free but Gargano pursues to CHOP! And CHOP! Theory goes to a corner, Gargano CHOPS him again! Gargano follows Theory but Theory kicks low! Theory throws hands but Gargano dodges to CHOP again! Fans rally for “JOHNNY WRESTLING!” as Gargano stomps a mudhole into Theory. Fans fire up, Gargano storms back in to CHOP! Gargano whips corner to corner, Theory reverses but Gargano BOOTS back! Gargano goes up to FLYING RANA!
Theory staggers up, swings but misses, into the Schoolboy KICK! Theory bails out and Gargano brings him up. Theory grabs at Gargano but Gargano ROCKS Theory! And again! And again! Theory wobbles, Gargano slingshots, but Theory blocks the DDT! Theory fisherman’s the leg, APRON AOI SHOUDO! Gargano goes down and Raw goes to break!
Gargano writhes, Theory looms over him, the ring count climbs but Theory just leaves Gargano behind. Theory gets in at 6 of 10, Gargano stands at 8 but jumps in at 9! Theory rains down fists, then he TOSSES Gargano back out. Gargano crawls, Theory stalks him, and THROWS him into barriers! Theory drags Gargano up to THROW him into the timekeeper’s area! Theory sits on the barriers to take a selfie before going into the ring. Gargano stirs at 5 of 10, crawls his way around at 7, and hurries in at 9! Theory scoops Gargano for a BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Theory wraps on a chinlock and he grinds Gargano down.
Gargano endures, fans rally up, and Gargano fights up to throw body shots. Gargano runs, but into a BIG elbow! Theory struts over to stand over Gargano. Theory drags Gargano up, snapmares him and stomps him down! Cover, TWO! Theory sits Gargano up to wrap on a chinlock again. Theory grinds Gargano down, but Gargano fights up to throw body shots. Theory knees low! And CLUBS Gargano down! Theory suplexes, Gargano slips out and he ROCKS Theory with forearm after forearm! Gargano runs, into a BOOT! But he comes back with a ROLLING ELBOW! Both men are down as Raw returns to single picture!
Fans rally as a standing count starts. Theory and Gargano stand, Gargano throws big forearms! Gargano whips, Theory reverses but Gargano CROSSBODIES! And then he clotheslines and ENZIGURIS! Theory goes to a corner, Gargano DOUBLE KNEES him! Gargano goes corner to corner but Theory puts him on the apron. Gargano SLINGSHOT SPEARS! Cover, TWO! Theory bails out, Gargano builds speed, but Theory slide sin. Gargano hurries back to the apron, SLINGSHOT into a FOREARM! Theory hurries to pump handle COMPLETE SHOT! Cover, TWO!! Theory is furious but Gargano is still in this!
Theory says he has surpassed Gargano, and he rains down fists. Theory drags Gargano up, ROCKS him again, then storms up. Gargano ROCKS Theory and fans rally, but Theory ROCKS Gargano back. Gargano ROCKS Theory, they both throw forearms! And again! Gargano fakes Theory out, mule kick! But Theory ducks the Buzzsaw to fireman’s carry! A-TOWN, NO! Schoolboy, but Theory ducks the kick! Theory steals the GargaNO Escape!! Gargano endures, rolls it to a cover, TWO!! Gargano dodges Theory, tilt-o-whirl takedown! GargaNO Escape!! Gargano has Theory now, Theory endures, but he rolls it around and scoops Gargano!
Theory shakes his head, pops Gargano up, but Gargano slips off! Theory SUPERKICKS first! Theory is fuming, he rains down fists and shouts, “I told you! I am the man!” Fans boo as Theory aims from the apron. Theory slingshots, but into a SUPERKICK! Gargano sends Theory out of the ring! Fans fire up as Gargano DIVES for a TORNADO DDT!! Gargano puts Theory back in, drags himself up to the apron, and he slingshots again, ONE FINAL BEAT!! Cover, Gargano wins!!
Winner: Johnny Gargano, by pinfall
And that’s the way to do it! Johnny Wrestling gets another great win in Brooklyn, will Gargano get a golden opportunity soon enough?
Rey Mysterio VS Chad Gable w/ Otis!
The King of Lucha is doing his best to move on from Dominik Mysterio leaving his side, throwing hate his way, and sticking with The Judgement Day. Can Rey put the pieces back together? Or will The Alpha Academy pick him apart like vultures?
The bell rings and Rey circles with Gable. They tie up, Gable waistlocks, spins, wrenches and wristlocks. Rey wrenches, wristlocks, but Gable spins through to headlock, spin and drop toehold! “A THANK YEW~!” Gable has the armlock then shifts to a headlock. Rey throws body shots, powers out, but Gable runs him over! “A THANK YEW~!” Gable and Rey speed up, Gable body scissors to roll and clutch, TWO! Gable hits a headlock takeover and he grinds Rey down. Rey endures, fights up, but Gable wrenches. Gable whips but Rey KICKS him! Rey runs, dodges Gable, then dodges again to RANA! Gable tumbles out and fans fire up!
Gable and Otis regroup but Rey runs in to dropkick Gable down! Rey builds speed to slide and SUNSET BOMB Gable into barriers! Fans fire up for Rey but oh no! Here comes the Judgement Day! Rhea Ripley & Dominik Mysterio walk out on stage, and Rhea wears a mocking “tribute armband” for Beth Phoenix! They’re already in Rey’s head, will Rhea & Dom do something to him? We’ll see, after the break.
Raw returns and Gable has Rey up top! Rey fights Gable off and knocks him down, to then SEATED SENTON! Rey keeps moving, he tilt-o-whirl headscissors! Gable goes to a corner, Rey runs in but Gable dodges. Rey goes up, jumps back but Gable catches Rey to an Electric Chair and SLAM! Then a deadlift GERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO! Rey escapes but Gable snarls. Gable drags Rey back up, waistlocks again but Rey elbows free. Rey runs, wheelbarrows, then victory rolls! But Gable rolls through to ANKLE LOCK! Rey flounders, reaches out, rolls and he kicks away at Gable! But Gable holds onto the hold!
Rey rolls and POSTS Gable! Gable flops out of the ring, and then Rey PLANCHAS, but Otis catches him! Otis pops Rey around, but Rey slips off to POST Otis! Rey stares down Dom & Rhea, then shoulders into Gable! Rey slingshots but Gable turns it into an Alabama, but Rey RANAS free! Gable is on the ropes, Rey dials it up, 619! SPLASH! Cover, Rey wins!
Winner: Rey Mysterio, by pinfall
A great rebound win for Rey, but now Dom & Rhea get on the apron. Rey shakes his head, but Dom dares him to do something. Rey refuses, but Rhea stands in Rey’s way. Rey turns back to Dom, and Dom wants Rey to hit him! Rey pushes and shoves Rey! “You gotta hit me! It’s gotta be now!” Rey refuses, and he puts his hands behind his back. So Dom SLAPS Rey! Dom wants Rey to hit him back! Rhea laughs as she watches Rey’s torment. Dom drops to his knees, Rey runs, but past Dom to DECK Priest! Rey knew the rest of Judgement Day was coming! Rey dodges Finn and tilt-o-whirls him into Dom! Rey DROPKICKS Priest, then drop toeholds Finn onto ropes!
Fans fire up and Rey dials it up, but Dom CLOBBERS Rey!! Fans boo Dom but he doesn’t care. Dom looms over his own father, and still dares him to hit back! Fans chant, “YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!” at Dom, but Rey refuses to fight his son. Rey asks Dom, “Why? Why, Dom?!” Dom says it has to happen! It has to happen!! Rey doesn’t understand, but he’s in tears as he turns away. So Dom CLOBBERS Rey! Rhea holds Rey on the ropes and Dom gives some Latino Heat. Dom dials it up, to 619!! Dom hits his father with his own signature move that he passed down to Dom! Is there no low the Judgement Day won’t stoop to?
Raw returns to The Judgement Day in the ring.
After all the damage Dom had done to him physically and emotionally, Rey was left in tears as he clutched his battered body. But Rhea laughs as she has the mic. “Like I’ve said every single week since you peasants can’t get it through your thick skulls… The Judgement Day: we RUN Monday Night Raw!” Priest laughs because the fans hate to hear the truth! Every single person that steps to the Judgement Day falls! All the way, the Judgement Day continues to rise. But y’know what? Let’s talk about something more important: Finn Balor handled business at Extreme Rules! Finn says, “Like I’ve said before, when you come at Finn, you best not miss.”
“So to all the people who were cheering and partying and celebrating Edge’s miracle return to the ring after a nine year absence, here’s the cold hard truth: I ended the party. I stopped the celebration. I’m the one who pissed on y’all’s parade!” Finn made Edge say the words, “I QUIT!” Yes! Finn made Edge say those words! Hey, Dom, what’d Edge say? “Edge said, ‘I quit.'” Hey, Priest. What’d he make Edge do? Finn made Edge quit! That’s right! And do you know why? Because Balor is too legit to quit! And y’know what? Have you seen it? Let’s watch it! A replay package shows Finn VS Edge in their I Quit match, but in the end, Finn wasn’t alone! Though, neither was Edge!
Rey tried to help Edge beat Finn but Dom beat down Rey. Beth Phoenix tried to help her husband, Edge, but Rhea Ripley knocked her out with BRASS KNUCKLES! And when Edge still refused, the Judgement Day threatened Beth! Edge said those two dreaded words, giving Finn the win. But then Rhea showed no mercy and still hit Beth with a Con-Chair-To!! “You taught us too well!” Back in the present, The Judgement Day is smiling but the fans are booing. Rhea says that brings a tear to her eye. “The Glamazon, Beth Phoenix. Hah! What a joke! Beth, what I did to you was just a glimpse of what I’m capable of.”
Dom says watching Rhea in action, well, y’know… Fans boo but Finn tells them to shut up! They’re all just jealous anyway! Dom says watching Rhea in action, smacking Edge’s wife with that chair, “did it for me. And I know that it did it for all of you as well.” And Dom’s favorite part, other than 619’ing his own dad, was seeing the pathetic and devastated look on Rey’s face. Rey deserves to feel as useless and as helpless as he’s made Dom feel his entire life! Finn pats Dom on the shoulder and says that’s right. Which brings us to “Uncle Alan Styles.” Finn tells AJ that he better have reconsidered things, because Finn has all but run out of mercy.
Finn is here tonight to offer an ultimatum. Styles- APPEARS! Styles has a mic to say, “Finn, as long as we’ve known each other, it’s come down to this? An ultimatum?” Finn says Styles has made this harder than it needed to be. Finn, hold on. Styles isn’t here to argue. Oh? Styles says Finn is right. Everything that he ever needed was standing right in front of him. Styles has been alone for far too long. There comes a time in a man’s life when he needs friends. In Styles’ case, he needs family! So for the first time since they met in Japan to right here now in the WWE, is Styles not his brother’s keeper? Styles kneels before Finn!?
Fans boo but Finn offers a hand. Styles takes it and he stands back up. They hug! The Phenomenal One is now in the Judgment Day?! Finn is so proud! He knew Styles would come around. But then Styles says, “I wasn’t talking about you.” WHAT!?! WHAT?!?! The GOOD BROTHERS, Karl Anderson & Luke Gallows, are BACK!! Finn is freaking out as The Machine Gun and Big Doc LG are here, and Brooklyn is losing their minds! Finn says this is BS, and Dom says this is a big mistake! But Gallows DECKS Dom! The brawl is on! Styles is after Finn, Gallows has Priest and Anderson has Dom! Rhea BOOTS Anderson, but Gallows clotheslines Priest out!
Finn and Styles are alone, having it out in the ring! Priest sends Gallows into steps, Anderson ROCKS Dom, Styles fires off the Blitz! Finn bails out and wants a timeout, but Styles TACKLES Finn over the desk! Gallows SMACKS Priest with a chair! Anderson DECKS Dom! Brooklyn is loving this as Gallows DECKS Priest over the barriers! Things spill out to the crowd but the Judgement Day slips away! All except Finn. Finn sees he’s surrounded, he runs for it! He slips away but it is clear the OC is back!
Byron Saxton has a sit-down interview with Bayley.
The Role Model is NOT Raw Women’s Champion, and Byron asks her if she considers what happened at Extreme Rules to be “a setback in Damage Control’s plan to take control of the Women’s Division?” Dakota Kai & Iyo Sky are there, and Kai handles this. “Setback? You wanna talk about setbacks, why do you think Bayley brought me with her to SummerSlam?” Kai was at rock bottom, and Bayley was the only one to extend a hand. Dakota dares, hopes and prays that anyone tries to do anything to hurt DMG CTRL, because Dakota will do anything to hurt them. Can anyone say the same about Asuka, Alexa Bliss or Bianca Belair?
Iyo says something in Japanese and Kai agrees. “These women have no idea what Iyo and I would do for Bayley!” When Bayley gets her rematch, they will punish Bianca until Bayley is holding the gold! Iyo does not like Bianca, Asuka or Alexa! Bayley is going to kick Candice LeRae’s ass and nothing will stop her! DMG CTRL heads out, will the Poison Pixie be punished for The EST simply defending her title?
Roman Reigns, Paul Heyman & Solo Sikoa are heading out.
Roman says that was pretty good, and Heyman agrees. But Jey asks what’s going on. Where’re they going? Jey wants to talk to him about tonight. Roman says he doesn’t have time for that. The Wise Man got them set up in a pad tonight and they’re gonna do New York! But the Usos are staying here with Sami. Wherever Sami is, Jey & Jimmy should be. In fact, since Jey will be here, he needs to make sure the Honorary Uce wins tonight. Can Jey do that? Yeet. Okay, then. Let’s go, Solo. No, no, Solo’s with Roman tonight. Oh… Heyman shrugs and gets in the SUV with Roman and Solo. They head out, will the Usos & Sami be alright on their own?
Bayley VS Candice LeRae!
The Role Model isn’t Raw Women’s Champion, but not for lack of trying. Kai & Sky did help her in the Ladder Match, but not even all three of them could stop the strongEST, fastEST, toughEST, and roughEST in the WWE. Will Bayley just take out all her frustrations on Candice Wrestling? Or will the Poison Pixie prove she’s deserving of her own opportunities?
The bell rings and the two circle. Bayley kicks low, CLUBS and ROCKS Candice, then RAMS her into a corner! Bayley stomps a mudhole, whips Candice to ropes, but Candice reverses. Bayley runs Candice over, covers, ONE! Bayley is upset already but she drags Candice up. Candice arm-drags free! And then arm-drags again! And drop toeholds! Bayley crawls but Candice dropkicks her down! Candice then runs to hit a NECK SNAPPER! Jackknife bridge, TWO! Candice drags Bayley up but Bayley throws body shots. Bayley throws Candice out to the apron, but Candice avoids the shoulder to KNEE low!
Bayley clutches ribs, Candice climbs up and MISSILE DROPKICKS! Bayley bails out but Candice keeps her focus as Raw goes picture in picture.
Bayley winces, still feeling every bit of the ladder match. Candice WRECKS her with a dropkick! Candice goes out to bring Bayley up and in, then hurries to cover, TWO! Bayley hurries to bail out again, and Candice goes out after her. But Bayley FLAPJACKS Candice into the post! Bayley puts Candice in then drags her to the corner. Bayley SLAMS the leg against the post! Candice clutches her knee but Bayley drags her to a cover, TWO! Bayley stomps Candice around, drags her onto the ropes, and CHOKES her! The ref counts, Bayley lets off, and Bayley mocks “Mama Wrestling.” Bayley stomps Candice then digs her boots in!
The ref counts, Bayley lets off, and Bayley soaks up the heat. Bayley puts Candice’s leg around the ropes to pull! The ref counts, Bayley lets off and she snap suplexes Candice down. Cover, TWO! Bayley drags Candice around to knee her in the back. Bayley shouts at fans, pushes Candice over and stomps away on the bad leg. Bayley drags Candice around by that leg, but Candice hops up to ENZIGURI the bad arm! Bayley staggers but Candice cradles! TWO! Bayley rushes in but into a roll-up! TWO! Candice ROCKS Bayley and Raw returns to single picture. Bayley comes back but Candice ROCKS her again and again!
Candice CHOPS and ROCKS over and over in the corner! Fans fire up as Candice fires off! The ref counts, Candice lets off and she back body blocks! Candice snapmares Bayley, to then step up SENTON! And then basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Candice shakes out the bad leg, fans rally up, and Candice drags Bayley up. Bayley RAMS Candice in a corner! But Candice BOOTS back! Candice hops up but Bayley shoves her down! Candice is in a Tree of Woe and Bayley tortures the legs! Bayley drags Candice out of the corner, KNEE-DT! And then a ROSE PLA- CRADLE?! Candice wins!!
Winners: Candice LeRae, by pinfall
Bayley is shocked and furious, but Candice gets away! Bayley couldn’t get redemption but Kai & Sky get revenge! They CLOBBER Candice, beat her down, and put her back in the ring! Iyo underhooks and lifts, Dakota SUPERKICKS Candice into the TIGER BACKBREAKER! Bayley and Sky stand on Candice, but here comes Bianca! She DECKS Kai but Bayley BOOTS her! Bayley sets Bianca up, DROPKICK BOOT SANDWICH on the apron! And then Bayley hits a RUNNING KNEE on Candice! Fans boo but DMG CTRL stands tall. Kai & Sky bring Bianca around, Bayley hits a MACHO ELBOW on Bianca on the belt!
Fans boo even more, but DMG CTRL stands tall and Bayley shouts, “This is what a real damn team looks like!” Will these three soon control the Raw Women’s Division?
The Miz meets up with Maryse backstage.
O M G she looks incredible. But this can’t be a good idea, right? They both know “He Who Shall Not Be Named” is going to show, right? Maryse has Miz calm down. They can’t let some lunatic ruin his party after Maryse worked on it for many months. And here’s a little something. Oh, his first gift of the night! He opens it up, and it’s a Louisville Slugger! They both kiss, but will Miz’s bad feeling become a reality?
Raw returns to Maryse in the ring.
“Ladies and gentlemen, tonight is such a special night because we get to celebrate the birthday of my husband. So please help me welcome The Awesome One, The Miz!” The Hollywood A-Lister makes his entrance, showing off his brand new baseball bat, and he joins Maryse in the ring. There’s gold and silver balloons and presents, and even a Miz ice sculpture! Miz tells Maryse she outdid herself! She spent so much money! Do you know how expensive ice sculpture is? Or how expensive that bat is? Read it! It’s signed by the best deep ball hitter ever! Cleveland’s Jose Ramirez! Oh, sorry, did you expect him to say Aaron Judge?
You New Yorkers love Judge! You think he’s the best in MLB! Well here’s something Miz will explain to you: If you think having the best player in the league is enough to win championships, here’s two words for you: KEVIN DURANT. The fans boo but Maryse says to ignore them. Miz, open a gift. Any gift? Yes, any gift! He unveils the MASSIVE BALLS! O M G, this is perfect! Two massive Miz balls to go with his big giant bat! He loves them! He wants more gifts! Yes, go with the big one next! Sweet! Which one is the big one? Hold his bat. There, the middle. Fans taunt Miz for his “TINY BALLS! TINY BALLS!”
Miz tunes them out and pick sup the box. Wow, it’s heavy. IT HAS LUMIS’ HEAD!!! Miz sees Lumis, then puts the box back on! To then BASH away on the boxes!! But Miz missed Lumis every time! Then where is he?! Lumis slithers in from the other direction! And he wraps Miz in the SILENCE!! Maryse tries to save Miz but he almost kicks her into the cake! Maryse gets back, up but then he DOES kick her into the cake! Miz flails, slips free, and RUNS! He just leaves Maryse behind!? Maryse cleans herself up but Lumis looks right at her! Maryse turns around, and then she bails out! Maryse storms off, and Lumis grabs a knife!
Lumis goes over to the big balls, and POPS THEM! And then fans chant, “EAT THE CAKE!” Lumis cuts himself a slice, and has some cake! Is it good? More importantly, will we ever understand why Lumis is after The Miz?
DX talk with some local talent backstage.
What’re these guys’ names? Joey Ace and Chico! Well, okay. Get those biceps going, keep the blood flowing. Go out there and give it to Omos! There’s two of you, one of him, you’ve got this! Go, boys, go! Haze & Chico head out and HBK admits, those two are dead. But then Miz storms in and asks where HHH went! Miz is so sick of that lunatic! Look what he did to his massive… gifts! Can DX get some cake? Are you serious?! HBK says Lumis may not be a Marine, but he’s a good guy. He doesn’t just go after anyone. Miz had to do something to anger him. Miz did nothing to this guy! NOTHING! But Miz will do anything to get rid of him
Oh, anything? Yes, anything! Well then… Next week, Miz VS Lumis, 1v1! If Miz wins, Lumis is gone forever. But if Miz loses, Lumis gets those enormous gifts. And also a contract with WWE. But still. Does Miz have the balls? Oh, it’s on! Oooh~! Okay! Wait, since when did Road Dogg become a booker? He’s pretty sure he can do that. Will HHH approve of this high stakes showdown?
2v1 Handicap: Omos w/ MVP VS Robert Adams & Joseph Torres!
The Nigerian Giant comes to Brooklyn, will he storm through it like Godzilla? Or will “Chico” and “Joey Ace” manage to bring the monster down with DX’s encouragement?
The bell rings and Omos BOOTS Ace! Chico is stunned, then tries to run! Omos drags him back into the ring, scoops him, and gives him SNAKE EYES! Omos runs to CLOBBER Chico! MVP says, “Let ’em know!” Omos suplexes Ace and holds him up with one arm, before the TOSS! MVP cheers Omos on and Omos grabs Ace. Chico jumps on but Omos just CLOBBERS Ace all the same! And then he RAMS Chico in the other corner, before he CLOBBERS Ace again! Double choke grips, DOUBLE CHOKE SLAMS!! Omos snarls and he stands on Chico to pin, Omos wins!
Winner: Omos, by pinfall
MVP raises Omos’ hand in victory, but the devastation isn’t over! MOUNTAINTOP SLAM for Ace! MOUNTAINTOP SLAM for Chico! MVP says that’s good, and they head out. Will Omos leave nothing but destruction in his wake as he heads back towards a title?
WWE United States Championship: Bobby Lashley VS Seth Rollins!
The All Mighty technically owes Matt Riddle for helping him keep this title after The Visionary tried to steal it away. But after an ambush attack last week, Lashley is more than willing to give Rollins another shot if it means another chance for Lashley to put the Hurt Lock on Rollins. Will Rollins even be up to this title fight after the brutality that was unleashed inside the Fight Pit?
Before the match, Lashley gets the mic. “Brooklyn! I say this every week: I’m gonna be a fighting champion for all of you! And at this point, I’ve beaten some of the best of this business. I’ve been names like Drew McIntyre, Roman Reigns, Brock Lesnar, and now I have Seth Rollins who thinks that’s okay to come and sneak me because he didn’t feel he had a fair shot at my United States Championship-” WAIT. That’s not Rollins! That’s BROCK LESNAR!! The Beast is in Brooklyn and fans are going nuts! Lesnar has his pyro, he goes to the ring, and after getting the fans pumped up, he grabs the mic and stares down Lashley.
“Well holy SH*T! Good evening, Brooklyn. And good evening, Bobby Lashley.” FIREMAN’S CARRY! F5!!! Fans lose their minds again as The Beast just levels the All Mighty! Fans want that “ONE MORE TIME!” and Lesnar obliges! Waistlock and GERMAN SUPLEX! And then another fireman’s carry, for another F5!! Fans still want that “ONE MORE TIME!” Lashley manages to sit up, and Lesnar just picks him up! For a KIMURA!!! Lashley flails but not even tapping out would save him since this isn’t a match! Lesnar lets go once the damage is done, and he takes his leave. The Beast is back, but what about the US title match?
Raw returns as refs check Lashley.
They want him to go to the back to get checked by medical, but Seth Rollins makes his entrance! Rollins is beaten and battered, too, so he must think this is fair and square now! Rollins wants Lashley to get in but the refs are saying Lashley shouldn’t. Rollins wants his fight NOW, and dares Lashley to get in here! Fans sing “OH~ OHH~ OHHHH~!” as Rollins keeps demanding a fight. Lashley clutches the arm and Rollins gets the mic. “HEY! I know you can hear me! You’re not gonna get outta this title match that easy! Bobby, I want the match, and I want it right now! You said you were a fighting champion!”
Isn’t Lashley a fighter? Isn’t he a champion? Isn’t he a soldier?! But he’s not! He’s a DISGRACE to the US title! And to his country! Lashley’s pissed now! Lashley storms up to the ring, even with one good arm, and he pops it back into place! The refs keep telling him now, but Lashley tells them to ring the damn bell! Well, then here goes!
WWE United States Championship: Bobby Lashley VS Seth Rollins!
The bell rings, and Lashley SPEARS into a PEDIGREE!! Cover, TWO!!! Rollins hurries up top while Lashley’s still down! FROG SPLASH!! The bad ribs slow Rollins down, Rollins manages to cover, TWO!! Both men writhe in pain from their damaged bodies, but Rollins manages to stand up first. Rollins lines up his shot, runs in from the corner, CURB- NO, Lashley dodges! Lashley runs to SPEAR!! But Lashley can’t cover from the pain in his bad arm! Rollins flounders from the pain in his ribs, but he stands up, into a half nelson! But the bad arm keeps the full nelson from finishing! Rollins CLUBS away on the bad arm, then he ROLLING ELBOWS!
Lashley wobbles, into a SUPERKICK! Rollins spins, DREAM SMASHER ELBOW! Rollins runs and PENALTY KICKS the bad arm! Rollins aims from the corner again, he runs in and CURB STOMPS!! Fans are torn but fired up as Rollins revels in it all! “OH~ OHH~ OHHH~!” Rollins tells Lashley to get up again, and then he runs in to CURB STOMP AGAIN!!! Cover, Rollins wins!
Winner: Seth Rollins, by pinfall (NEW WWE United States Champion)
Brock Lesnar did the damage, but Seth Freakin’ Rollins takes the gold! Will Lashley look for revenge on The Visionary who beat him? Or on The Beast who beat him down?
Backstage interview with Bobby Lashley.
Byron realizes he’s emotional right now- Emotional? He’s PISSED! What Brock did was unforgiveable! Lesnar came in, and now Rollins is champion? Lashley isn’t done with Rollins, he’ll come back for that title. But first is Lesnar. Lashley will beat the hell out of Lesnar once he gets a chance! Lashley challenges Lesnar to show up next week so that the Beast can be exposed as nothing “but a little b*tch!” The All Mighty’s wrath has been awoken, but will he be able to tear down Suplex City?
Knock knock.
A rather glitchy message from Bray Wyatt plays. “I used to live in the prison inside my head. It was the only place that I could ever truly be free. Revel in what you are. REVEL IN WHAT YOU ARE! HAHAHAHAHAHA! REVEL IN WHAT YOU ARE!!! HAHAHAHAHA…! Revel in what you are.” What does all of this mean?
Sami Zayn w/ The Usos VS Matt Riddle!
The Honorary Uce is riding pretty high after the ego boosts he’s been getting from The Tribal Chief accepting him into The Bloodline and then appointing him above the Usos. Will Sami be riding high after a win over The Bro? Or will that Fight Pit victory lead Riddle to another big win in the chase for some gold?
Raw returns and Sami makes his entrance, the Usos right behind him. The bell rings and the two tie up. Sami headlocks, Riddle powers out but Sami runs him over. Sami holds up the finger, #WeTheOnes, and fans sing “Ole~ ole ole ole~! Ole~, Ole~!” for Sami. Sami and Riddle tie up again, Sami headlocks again, but Riddle powers up and out again. Things speed up and Riddle KICKS Sami down! Riddle then KNEES Sami in the side! Sami goes to ropes but Riddle KICKS him in the corner. Riddle ROCKS Sami, whips him to ropes, then CLOBBERS Sami! Cover, TWO! Riddle stays on Sami with a chinlock and leans on the hold.
Sami endures, fights up, and fans duel. Sami arm-drags free, things speed up and Sami CLOBBERS Riddle now! Cover, ONE! Sami throws hands on Riddle at the ropes, then CHOKES him on the ropes! The ref counts, Sami lets off at 4, and Jey goes up to BOOT Riddle back in! Sami is a bit perplexed, and he says, “You told me to handle this, right? I’m handling it. I’m handling it. I don’t need your help.” Fans chant “UCEY!” at Jey but then Riddle throws Sami out! Riddle goes up and out and PENALTY- NO, Sami dodges to trip up Riddle! Sami then ARABIAN PRESSES Riddle down! Fans fire up while Raw goes to break.
Raw returns and Sami drags Riddle up to bump off buckles. Sami bumps Riddle more, and Riddle flounders away. Sami hops up and leaps to AX HANDLE! Cover, TWO! Sami goes up the corner again, leaps, and Riddle dodges to spin Sami around! PELE! Sami falls over and both men are down! Fans rally up and Jey shouts at Sami to get up! Riddle and Sami stir, Riddle throws palm strike after palm strike and BOOTS! Sami rebounds, but into a BROSPLODER! PENALTY KICK! BROTON! But Sami flounders away to avoid the cover. Riddle forearms in the corner, runs in, but into a scoop and MICHINOKU DRIVER! Cover, TWO!!
Riddle survives and Sami is frustrated. Jey is pacing but Sami goes to a corner and climbs up. Sami aims but Riddle gets up there to join him! Sami flails and throws body shots to stop the cutter! Sami HEADBUTTS Riddle down! Sami leaps, but into a FINAL FLASH! Cover, TWO!! Riddle is beside himself as Sami survives! Jey shouts at Sami to get up, but fans rally for “SAMI USO!” Riddle climbs up a corner but Sami goes after him. Riddle elbows Sami away, reaches the top, but Sami trips him up! Riddle tumbles to the mat, but Sami claims he needs to be checked on. But then Jey rushes in! Sami stops Jey from attacking Riddle!
Sami says he doesn’t need Jey’s help, but Riddle rolls Sami! TWO!!! Sami escapes but runs into a headscissors that sends him out the ring! FLOATING BRO ATTACK! Fans fire up and so does Riddle as Raw goes picture in picture!
Riddle looms over Sami while staring down the Usos. The Usos back up, Riddle puts Sami in the ring, and Riddle KICKS Sami! And KICKS! And KICKS! Sami wobbles as Riddle KICKS him more and more! Riddle powers up, takes aim, but Sami ducks! Roll up, but Riddle rolls through to BUZZSAW! Cover, TWO! Sami is still in this and Riddle grows frustrated. Riddle hobbles over, drags Sami up and hauls him to the top rope. Riddle CHOPS Sami, climbs up after him, and he throws big forearms! Riddle then climbs to the very top, but Sami throws body shots! They brawl, Riddle ROCKS Sami but Sami CLUBS away on Riddle!
Sami adjusts, to SUPER SUNSET BOMB!! Cover, TWO!! Riddle survives and Sami can’t believe it! Jimmy coaches Sami up and Sami grits his teeth. Sami drags himself up the ropes, drags Riddle up and clinches, but Riddle fights the exploder! Sami CLUBS away on Riddle, then tries again! But Riddle hits a JUMPING TRIANGLE! Sami is caught as Riddle squeezes tight! Sami is turning red, but he reaches out with a hand! And then a leg! ROPEBREAK! Riddle lets go at 4 but he calls upon those voices in his head, bro! Riddle aims as Sami rises, RK- NO! Sami powers out, Raw returns to single picture as things speed up, DOUBLE LARIATS take both men down!
The Usos are stressing out but Sami sits up. Sami throws hands on Riddle but Riddle gives them back. They go back and forth, fans rally up, and Riddle gets the edge. Riddle runs, but into a BOOT! Sami runs, but Riddle dodges to ripcord and FINAL FLASH! Sami goes to a corner, Riddle runs in, but Sami clinches! EXPLODER into the corner! Sami hurries to the other end, fans fire up for the HELL- POWERSLAM!! Riddle brings that one outta nowhere, and speaking of The Viper, Riddle drags Sami in through ropes! But Sami THROWS Riddle out! Sami has the ref check him again, but now he expects the Usos to do something? He did tell Jey to stand down.
Sami goes out to fetch Riddle, but Riddle KICKS him first! The Usos step but Jey tells Jimmy to stay back. This is what Sami wants, right? Riddle KICKS away on Sami! Sami gets in the ring, Jey likes that, but Sami ducks a kick for BLUE- NO! RKO!!! Cover, Riddle wins!!
Winner: Matt Riddle, by pinfall
That’s not what Roman wanted for the Honorary Uce! But Jey says it’s okay, Sami said he wanted to handle business on his own. The Usos check on Sami as he gets out of the ring, who will take the blame for this one?
Are you ready?!
The theme song is back, “BREAK IT DOWN!” And riding in on a Jeep, it’s DEGENERATION X, including HHH! They fire the cannon, just like back in the days of the Monday Night War! HHH, HBK, X-Pac & Road Dogg head to the ring, throwing glowsticks to the fans. They get in the ring, form up, and as the fans get louder, they CROTCH CHOP!! X-Pac asks Brooklyn to make a little noise! And a quick shout out to the missing magic ingredient, the Ninth Wonder of the World, CHYNA!
Road Dogg wants to see who remembers this: “Lllladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages. Tonight, De-Geriatric X proudly brings to you one half of the seven-time WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS OF THE WOOOOORLD~! The Road Dogg, Jessie James!” Fans take care of saying, “The Ass Man, Billy Gunn!” “The New! Age! OUTLAWS!” HHH says it smells funny in here. X-Pac says it smells good! Is that Dogg or the fans? No, that’s gas. But it has been 25 YEARS! Who was here watching them at the beginning? Many fans cheer, and HHH says not all of these people are THAT old. 25 YEARS! HBK doesn’t feel so bad now.
25 years IS a long time. But right now, HHH just has one thing he wants to know: “Are you ready? No, Brooklyn, I said! ARE! YOU! READYYY?!” Fans cheer because they are! “Then… For the thousands in attendance. For the millions watching at home. And for 25 years, we would like to say thank you and we love you all. Hold on, I gotta catch my breath first. Woo~. All right.” Dogg wishes HHH gave him that opportunity. “Llllllllllllllllet’s get ready to SUCK IIIIIIIIT~!” HBK says, “And as we’ve said 25 glorious years of Degeneration X… But I’m gonna put all of us out there right now here on the spot.” Fans chant for “HBK! HBK!”
HBK wants us to promise, if we’re somehow all back here 25 years from now, put them outta their miseries! “And if you ain’t down with that, we got two words for ya!” “SUCK IT!!” Fans will never forget this team! DX then, now and, well, maybe not forever, but here’s to 25 years to close the Raw season premiere!
My Thoughts:
An awesome episode for not just the Raw that follows a PPV but also the “season premiere.” Granted, the DX celebration was just a fun closing segment, DX also had a lot of fun in other segments, like setting up those poor jobbers against Omos and that really wacky opening where we actually get to see HHH sitting at the desk at gorilla. But HHH did have a point, this isn’t the Attitude Era, he’s also the boss now, they can’t get as wild as they used to. They had a good part with The Miz, too, after a great segment from Miz, Maryse and Lumis. I guess they’re maintaining the kayfabe that Lumis was released and hasn’t been rehired, so you gotta think Lumis is going to win next week so he can be a WWE superstar in canon.
Great match from Gargano and Theory, even though it feels really soon to be doing this one. Gargano winning is great, but I’m wondering where this goes from here. Rey VS Gable was a great match, but of course Judgement Day goes after him once again. This has been the most emotional I’ve seen Rey, this is a really interesting move. And then what’s wilder is that Styles has Gallows & Anderson back! I’m pretty sure Anderson is still NJPW’s NEVER Openweight Champion and he is in the middle of setting up his title match with Hikuleo, but I guess this is a clear sign that he’ll be losing that belt to say good-bye to NJPW again. Maybe. And either way, this is definitely to set up Survivor Series: WarGames, Judgement Day VS The OC.
Good promo from Damage Control, and very good match from Candice and Bayley. A great surprise that Candice won, but I’m thinking she’s going to be joining Bianca’s side as we get closer to Survivor Series: WarGames. Bayley wants another shot, she probably will get that title match, and I would think Bayley wins that to “vindicate” herself, and then we get a tiebreaker at the Royal Rumble or even WrestleMania, depending on how they rotate in enemies and allies. There’s also the women’s tag titles, so maybe Candice teams with Alexa Bliss while Asuka is kayfabe hurt with the bad knee, and we also bring in SmackDown’s Shotzi & Raquel.
Brock Lesnar showing up was wild because no one had any whiff of that happening until I think today. Everyone thought the return was “soon,” but they didn’t think this soon. Lesnar basically screwing Lashley out of the US title was an interesting way to get us a rematch of Lesnar VS Lashley, but it’s not like Lesnar VS Lashley needed the title. Plus, Rollins getting the US title fits what I’ve been feeling, and that is adding the title to his feud with Cody Rhodes. Cody returns, wins the US title, and he completes his Homelander cosplay in time for WrestleMania. Fans may want/expect Cody to go for the top title, but he probably has to wait until the plans for WrestleMania: Hollywood play out. And Cody’s never held the US title, so checking that off the list would mean him becoming Universal Champion makes him a WWE Grand Slam Champion, a huge crowning achievement for Cody’s return.
And of course, amazing stuff out of The Bloodline, the layers of this story are like an onion. It was also a nice continuation from Logan Paul stirring it up on SmackDown. Sami is getting a big head over being The Honorary Uce and it cost him with Riddle. Jey was told by Roman to make sure Sami won, but clearly that didn’t get back to Sami, and now we’ll have to wait and see this Friday who Roman gets mad at.
My Score: 8.9/10
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London calling to the champion crowns!
SmackDown brings gold to London as LA Knight defends his WWE US Championship and The Street Profits defend their tag team titles! Will the landscape change this close to WrestleMania?
OFFICIAL RESULTS
- WWE Tag Team Championships: The Street Profits VS Pretty Deadly; The Profits win and retain the titles.
- Kayden Carter & Katana Chance VS The Secret Her-vice w/ Chelsea Green; The Secret Her-vice wins.
- WWE United States Championship: LA Knight VS Braun Strowman; Braun wins, by disqualification, and Knight retains the title.
- Charlotte Flair VS Mia Yim w/ B-Fab; Charlotte wins.
- Randy Orton VS Drew McIntyre; McIntyre wins.
- Jimmy Uso VS The Miz; Jimmy wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
Cody Rhodes is here!
We follow The American Nightmare as walks to gorilla, then through the curtain, and London sings along with the song, “WHOA~ OH~!” Cody gets his pyro, says hello to fans along the ramp, and then we get the second “WHOA~ OH~!” and pyro. Cody goes to the ring, grabs a mic, then kneels down to kiss the WWE logo on the mat. The fans continue to sing along all the way to the end, “I AM MY KINGDOM!” The fans then cheer, and Cody holds up the belt to fire them up even more! The fans now sing for “CODY! CODY RHODES~!” and he soaks it in. The fans cheer again as Cody smiles, and he finally says, “So, London~! Whaddya wanna talk about?”
The fans chant “Let’s Go, Cena!” “CENA SUCKS!” Cody hears that dueling, and he smiles again. The song of “CODY! CODY RHODES~!” returns, then they cheer. Cody says, “At WrestleMania 41, I will be facing John Cena…” The fans boo, but Cody says, “I will be facing John Cena as he goes to break the record and win 17. But that is WrestleMania 41. In just a few nights, I will be standing face to face with John Cena in this very same city, in this very same arena.” The fans cheer that, but then here comes Randy Orton! Now the fans sing along with Voices as The Viper heads to the ring. Orton also high-fives fans before he joins Cody.
Orton grabs a mic, paces while the fans keep singing on their own, and then the fans cheer. Orton says he’s not really the sentimental type, but for Cody and for London, screw it. The fans chant “R K O! R K O!” and Orton tells Cody, “Look at you. Look at who you are now, the man you are now. Look at where he came from.” The fans cheer and sing “CODY! CODY RHODES~!” and Orton says he remembers a Cody in his early 20s, just breaking into the business. Cody was busting his ass harder than anyone else. He wasn’t exactly happy, and in fact, he was frustrated. But Cody was man enough, smart enough, to know he needed to grow, and that he couldn’t grow in the WWE.
Cody wasn’t exactly treated fairly in the WWE, so Cody left the WWE! That took some big ass balls to do what he did! Cody changed the business singlehandedly, and everyone in the back knows it. And Orton appreciates Cody for it. But then Cody came back, as they all knew one day he would. And the industry has been changed forever since the day Cody came back to the WWE. Cody is a bit teary eyed as Orton says Cody’s still the same guy, he just did what he set out to do, and he grew. Orton teases he would sing along with the fans, but the fans might leave. The fans again sing “CODY! CODY RHODES~!”
Orton asks if they remember when Cody Rhodes faced Seth Rollins in Hell in a Cell. The fans cheer because they do. Orton says that was impressive, and even impossible, as he started with a partially torn pec and then ended with a fully torn pec! His body changed all kinds of shades of purple that Orton’s never seen on a human body. The pain he must have been in. Cody persevered not just for himself. Maybe not even at all for Cody. It was not even for his family legacy; it was for each and every single fan out there! Then Cody went on to WrestleMania, beat Roman Reigns and finished the story!
But there’s always another story, isn’t there? And Cody’s right in the middle of one. Cody is in charge of his legacy, and it is a privilege for Orton to watch Cody take control of it. Ticket sales have been up, there’s more intrigue around the world, and listen to the people! It is 99.9% all because of Cody! The fans cheer that, and of course they sing. Orton says what he’s trying to say is a long-winded version of he respects Cody, loves him, and is very, very proud of him. The fans cheer that! Orton then says, “But… But now it is time for WrestleMania.” They both look to the sign, and Orton says he can guarantee Cody that Orton will kick Kevin Owens so hard in the head…!
Orton can just feel it already! He forgets how many days are left, but he can’t wait to remove Kevin’s head from his shoulders. And Orton knows Cody will enter champion, exit champion, but not before he beats the holy hell outta Cena all up and down the Vegas strip! But after all the smoke clears and the dust settles, just like Orton wants Number 17, there will come a time when Orton will want Number 15. But Orton won’t kick Cody in the balls like a coward. Orton will look Cody in the eye because he respects Cody, is proud of Cody, and sees him as an equal. Orton will look Cody in the eye and tell him that he’s coming for the title.
The fans cheer but wait! Drew McIntyre is here! The fans cheer the Scottish Terminator as he steps out on stage, mic in hand, and has a wry smile on his face as he looks at the ring. Drew waves as the fans now sing, “OH~ Drew McIntyre~!” Drew says, “Isn’t this wonderful? A couple of nepo babies having a love fest in the middle of the ring> It makes me absolutely sick. What’d you just say, Randy? if Cody gets through Cena at WrestleMania, you’re coming for that title? What exactly have you done since that big comeback to justify that title match? Aside be Randy Orton. The only big moment I can remember is you being on the shelf for months and months and months.
“People like to make jokes about it, but more people talk about my five-minute-45-second title reign than your entire comeback so far! So get to the back of the line, sunshine! As for you, Cody, you should’ve listened to me. But you shunned me. You attacked me. Everybody should’ve listened to me about John Cena, but they didn’t. And the next night, he kicked you right in the twig ‘n’ berries, proving me right as usual. And the main event of WrestleMania should be Cody Rhodes VS The UK’s only ever world champion, Drew McIntyre!” Fans do like that idea. But sadly, it’s not, because of that guyliner wearing Temu Undertaker, Damian Priest!
Drew wants to talk about what is happening. And what’s gonna happen! Drew steps up to the ring while fans sing for him again. Drew says it will not be Randy that takes the title from Cody, should he get through Cena; it’ll be McIntyre. The fans cheer, but Orton says they were trying to have a moment. Can Drew just cut the crap already? Drew says okay, sure. He’ll tell the truth, because that’s all he ever does. The truth is, Kevin might have a point! If those Voices are talking to Orton again, then they know Drew very, very well. And he’s thinking, “My God, Randy looks great! Absolutely jacked! On the outside.”
On the inside, that back is hanging by a thread. And if Orton provokes McIntyre, McIntyre will break him. And as for Cody- Cody kicks Drew and UPPERCUTS him! The fans fire up, and Orton R- NO, Drew gets away! The fans boo, but the battlelines are drawn! Even if Cody makes it out of the frying pan that is Las Vegas, it’ll be into the fire that is these contenders waiting in line! Will the American Nightmare be ready for whoever comes for the crown?
WWE Tag Team Championships: The Street Profits VS Pretty Deadly!
Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins are finally golden again, but it’s time to put the titles on the line already! And while they’re ready for the grind, they’re up against the hometown heroes! Will the Profits still be up in the O2? Or will Kit Wilson & Elton Prince say #YESBOY to a new reign of their own?
The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see who really wants the smoke!
The teams sort out and Kit starts with Dawkins. They tie up, Dawkins headlocks, but Kit powers up and out. Dawkins runs Kit over, the fans fire up, and Dawkins fires hands on Kit in the corner! The fans rally for Pretty Deadly, Dawkins whips Kit to a corner, but Elton takes that bump! Kit CLOBBERS Dawkins, then tags Elton! Atomic drop into DROPKICK! Ford runs up, but into a DOUBLE HIP TOSS! Dawkins whips, Elton reverses, and then Elton hurdles so Kit can DDT! The fans fire up with Pretty Deadly while the Profits bail out. Pretty Deadly has control while SmackDown goes picture in picture.
Elton is right on Dawkins as he gets in, and UPPERCUTS him to the corner. Elton clinches Dawkins for another UPPERCUT! Tag to Kit, and Elton RAMS into Dawkins so Kit can UPPERCUT! Dawkins flops over, Kit drags him up to wrench the arm. Kit whips, Dawkins reverses, but Kit grabs ropes. Kit ELBOWS Dawkins, DECKS Ford, but Dawkins CLOBBERS Kit! The ref reprimands but Dawkins RAMS Kit into the corner again and again! The ref counts, Dawkins fires fast hands, then he tags in Ford. Ford says, “SUCK IT!” then he KICKS Kit! Ford scuffs Kit, then drags him to a cover, TWO!
Ford keeps Kit down with a facelock, but Kit endures the grind. Kit fights up, fires body shots, but Ford whips him away. Kit sunset flips! Ford rolls through, and PENALTY KICKS! Ford mocks Elton with the Scott Hall fingers, and the ref has to keep Elton back. Ford drags Kit up, tags Dawkins, and the Profits mug Kit. Dawkins CLUBS Kit down, then stalks him. Dawkins stays between Kit and Elton, then whips Kit into the Profits’ corner. CYCLONE- NO, Kit dodges! Ford tags in, he keeps Kit from Elton now, but Kit slips out of the suplex! Kit fakes high to go low, hot tag to Elton! Elton rallies with LARIAT after LARIAT!
Elton kicks and whips Ford to a corner, then UPPERCUTS! Elton whips the other way, UPPERCUTS again, and then does it again! Elton adds to the hattrick with a lift, Ford says a quick prayer before the SUPLEX! Ford flounders, gets to his feet, but Elton dodges to springboard and FLYING UPPERCUT! Cover, TWO! Ford stays in this, but Elton stays on him. SmackDown returns to single picture and fans rally for Pretty Deadly as Elton gives Ford a back suplex. Ford lands out, waistlocks, but Elton switches and shoves Ford. Ford CLOBBERS Elton in return! Ford is also dazed but he covers, ONE!
Kit reaches out, Elton and Ford both crawl, hot tags to Kit and Dawkins! The fans fire up as Dawkins wrenches Kit, underhooks and SILENCER! Dawkins Electric Chair Lifts Kit, Ford climbs, but Kit slips free! Kit shoves Dawkins into Ford! Ford falls to the floor, but Dawkins ENZIGIRIS Kit! Elton tags in, and Kit LARIATS Dawkins! Pretty Deadly combine for DRY MARTI-KNEES! Cover, TWO!! Dawkins survives and the Profits are a bit unsure of what to do next. Dawkins crawls to a corner, Elton runs up, but Dawkins dodges! Elton hits buckles and Dawkins TOSSES Kit, then Dawkins hits a SKY HIGH on Elton!
Dawkins hurries to tag Ford and Ford climbs up! But Kit pushes Elton out of the way! Kit takes FROM THE HEAVESN, and Elton ghost pins Ford! TWO!! Ford escapes, and he ROCKS Elton! Elton UPPERCUTS Ford! Dawkins sneaks a tag, Ford SUPERKICKS! POUNCE SAIDO COMBO!! Cover, KIT BREAKS IT! The fans fire up while all four men are down! The teams go to opposite ends, then they all stand up in the corners. They all roar, all run in, and Kit SPEARS Ford while Elton FLYING UPPERCUTS Dawkins!! London is thunderous, and Kit hurries to tag in! Pretty Deadly gets Dawkins up, for SPILT MILK!! Cover, FORD BREAKS IT!
The fans are shocked, as is Elton, but Ford saves this for his team! “This is Awesome!” as Ford runs up and Elton TOSSES him out! Now DRY MARTI- NO! Dawkins doesn’t accept the second serving, and he DUMPS Kit out! Kit skins the cat while Dawkins DECKS Elton! Dawkins catches Kit to an Electric Chair! Ford rises, DOOMSDAY BLOCKBUSTER!! Cover, Profits win!
Winners: The Street Profits, by pinfall (still WWE Tag Team Champions)
Pretty Deadly put up a heroic fight, but the hometown heroes could not capture the gold. Dawkins & Ford hold onto the gold, will this be the strongest the Profits have ever been?
Kayden & Katana talk with Zelina Vega.
Carter & Chance know La Muneca got screwed over by The Green Administration. Chelsea thinks she’s untouchable, but someone’s gonna stop them eventually. Well, speaking of, Alba Fyre leads the way in as she & Piper Niven “scope the perimeter.” There’s one small threat. They frisk the “miniscule” threat, but nothing they haven’t dealt with before. Chelsea struts in and says, “The Eagle has landed~!” Zelina says she is so glad the “Bootleg Men in Black” have crashed the party. Now, yeah, they all know she’s small. But clearly this small “threat” is a big threat to Chelsea’s title reign. Otherwise, it wouldn’t have taken all three of them to beat her.
KC Squared agree with that. How about tonight, we see what happens when the odds are even? Chelsea says that’s fine, because Agents P & A are ready. The Secret Her-vice has been given their next mission, but will they be able to crash the party? Or will the party crash them?
Kayden Carter & Katana Chance VS The Secret Her-vice!
SmackDown returns and The Green Administration makes their entrance. The teams sort out, Alba starts against Katana, and the two tie up. Alba KNEES low, CLUBS Katana down, then fireman’s carries. Katana fights free, tags Kayden, and they KICK, double whip, and then trip Alba up for the basement DROPKICK! Katana adds a slingshot SENTON, Kayden covers, TWO! Kayden tags Katana, they double whip Alba to a corner, then Kayden runs in. Alba DUMPS Kayden out, ROCKS Katana, and she tags Piper! Katana arm-drags Alba out, then goes out to run up. Kayden gives her a boost, Katana CROSSBODIES Alba down!
The fans fire up, but Piper goes up and out?! CANNONBALL and down goes KC Squared! Piper salutes Chelsea and SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns, Kayden rallies on Alba while the fans rally up. Kayden fires up, runs in and whips, but Alba reverses. Kayden wheelbarrows, victory rolls, then SUPERKICKS! Kayden fires up again but the fans are torn. Kayden runs in at Alba to BOOT WASH her against the ropes! Chelsea protests, Kayden kicks at her, then Kayden springboards for a LEG DROP! Cover, TWO! Alba survives, Kayden whips, but Alba KICKS back! Tag to Piper, but Kayden jackknife bridges Alba! The ref explains bout the tag, Piper runs up, but Kayden moves! The SENTON hits Alba! Piper panics, Kayden tags Katana!
Katana goes up onto Kayden’s shoulders, VICTORY ROLL LAUNCHER, but Piper catches Katana! Katana fires hands, BOOTS, and then hurries to go up again. Kayden ROCKS Piper, and fireman’s carries?! SAMOAN DROP! Kayden then gives Katana the boost, for the KEG STAND SPLASH!! Cover, ALBA BREAKS IT! Kayden runs up on Alba to BOOT her out! Katana gives Kayden the boost now, SUPER CROSSBODY onto Alba! Kayden hurries to tag back in, and she brings Piper up. Piper swings, Kayden dodges and SUPERKICKS! Katana goes up, Piper staggers over that way, but Chelsea distracts the ref!
The fans are torn as Alba grabs Katana. Katana kicks Alba down, chases Chelsea off, but Piper sends Kayden into her! Piper scoops to PIPER DRIVER!! Cover, Secret Her-vice wins!
Winner: The Secret Her-vice, by pinfall
The Women’s US Champion helps her team, and now they all mug Kayden & Katana! But here comes Zelina! Vega runs down the ramp, CLOBBERS Alba, and then she gets in the ring! Zelina tilt-o-whirl DDTS Piper! And she KNEES Alba off the apron! But Chelsea CLOBBERS Zelina! Chelsea fires up, the UK is oddly with her, and she chicken wings Zeina. But Zelina fights free to fire forearms and body shots! And a BACK ELBOW! Zelina reels Chelsea in, CODE- SUPERKICK from Alba! SENTON from Piper! The Green Administration is just too much for Zelina to fight against alone! But can she, Kayden & Katana find a way to turn things around?
WWE United States Championship: LA Knight VS Braun Strowman!
Did the Mega Star just get this title back from Shinsuke Nakamura? YEAH! Did he help the Monster of All Monsters fight off Solo Sikoa’s rouge bloodline? YEAH! And now, does he have to defend this title against the monster he just helped? YEAH!! But will Knight still reign this close to WrestleMania? Or will Braun #GetTheseHands back on a championship?
The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and it’s time for Knight’s biggest challenge, YEAH!
The bell rings and the fans rally up as the two circle. The two tie up, and Braun SHOVES Knight away. Knight comes back, Braun SHOVES him down again! Knight gets up, gets around, and he headlocks. Braun powers up to back suplex, but Knight lands out! Knight tries but Braun’s too big to suplex! Braun ELBOWS Knight, storms up on him, but Knight fires haymakers! Knight whips, Braun reverses, but Knight KICKS back! Knight runs, but Braun HIP TOSSES! Cover, TWO! Knight stays in this, but Braun brings him up. Braun puts Knight in a corner, CHOPS, then runs, for a SPLASH! Knight sputters along ropes, Braun keeps moving, but Knight DUMPS him out!
The fans fire up as Knight then WRECKS Braun with a dropkick! Knight keeps moving, and he WRECKS Braun again! The fans fire up with Knight, but then Braun BOOTS Knight down! The fans are torn but Braun stands tall as SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns and Braun puts Knight back in the ring. The fans cheer as Knight KICKS Braun! Knight tries again, but Braun’s still too big to back suplex! Braun CLUBS Knight, then runs in at the corner. Knight BOOTS Braun, goes up, and FLYING BULLDOGS! Both men are down and the fans fire up! Knight and Braun rise back up, and Knight dodges a shot to JAB! Then he dodges to JAB! JAB! JAB! “YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!” But Braun KNEES low! Braun scoops, Knight slips free, and Knight RAMS Braun into buckles! Then the BACK SUPLEX! The fans fire up and Knight rises again! Knight spells it out, “L! A! KNIGHT! YEAH!” ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO!
Braun has plenty left in the tank but the fans rally for Knight. Knight stands Braun up to kick low, but Braun THROWS Knight away! Knight rises, and Braun LARIATS Knight up and out! The fans fire up as Braun rips the shirt! Braun gets on the track, and he runs in, STROWMAN EXPRESS MEETS JACOB FATU!! The Samoan Werewolf strikes Braun down!
Winner: Braun Strowman, by disqualification; LA Knight retains the title
The fans boo as Jacob now goes after Knight! He just ruined what was becoming a great match, but Jacob fires HEADBUTT after HEADBUTT on Braun! SAMOAN DROP onto the desk!! The desk doesn’t budge, but Braun might’ve been broken in half! The UK fires up for Fatu as he puts Braun in the ring! Jacob fires more HEADBUTTS, then HEADBUTTS away on Braun in the corner! The fans sing “OLE~ OLE OLE OLE, FATU~, FATU~!” Jacob runs corner to corner, but Knight kicks him first! Knight fires haymakers, “YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!” Jacob denies the BFT to POP-UP SAMOAN DROP! And then HIP ATTACK for Braun anyway!
Jacob keeps going, HIP ATTACK for Braun again! Jacob throws off his jacket, glares at Braun, and he runs in for a third HIP ATTACK! Braun flounders into the drop zone, so Jacob goes up, up, BEST MOONSAULT EVER! Direct hit on Braun, but the fans want that “ONE MORE TIME!” Jacob obliges, BEST MOONSAULT EVER! The Samoan Werewolf just tore up #OneBigSOB and LA Knight, will there be no stopping him from taking the United States Championship?
Backstage interview with Jimmy Uso.
Jackie Redmond is with #BigJim, and she says that while she knew WWE was going global this month, she did not know they’d get the slap heard ’round the world! Jimmy says he’d do it again, and he’ll slap Gunther as many times as he needs! Jimmy knows Jey is up in his own head, doubt is creeping on him. But just because Jey’s 0-3 against Gunther doesn’t mean Gunther’s unbeatable! The Ring General CAN be got! Jimmy’s going to Raw this Monday, he will bust Gunther’s ass, Jey will go to Mania and bust Gunther’s ass to become the WWE World Heavyweight Champion. And then they leave Las Vegas just like this: YEET!
Jimmy heads out, but then The Miz & Carmelo Hayes walk by. Miz is mocking Jimmy’s words, and he asks excuse me. Miz says it’s just funny that suddenly, Jimmy is a tough guy, even though for most of his career, he’s been “The Other Uso.” Doesn’t Jimmy get it? Jimmy and Jey are career sidekicks while Gunther is a main character. Gunther is the lead, neither Jimmy nor Jey can beat him. And here’s another thing: The Usos are just blips on the trailer that was Roman Reigns’ Bloodline. Melo says Jimmy & Jey are stuck outside the club, they can’t even get in.
Miz says as a former WWE Champion, a former WrestleMania main eventer, Jimmy will never know what it is to carry this industry. And after this year’s WrestleMania, neither will Jey. Oh, and by the way, if Jimmy ever slapped Miz like that, Jimmy would still be on the ground. Jimmy feints the slap and Miz freaks out. Jimmy says it may be him and Gunther on Monday, but he’ll holler at Aldis real quick so it can be Jimmy VS Miz here tonight. Yeah, YEET! Jimmy heads out, Melo says he thought Miz was gonna do something about the slap. Will Miz have to do something about running his mouth before he gets his teeth kicked in?
Solo Sikoa & Tama Tonga find Jacob Fatu backstage.
Solo asks Jacob what the Hell he was doing out there. Jacob goes out there alone without saying a thing to them? Jacob says he ain’t gotta say nothing to nobody! Matter fact, didn’t Solo not tap in with him last week? Tama says, “But Jacob,” only for Jacob to say, “But nothing, Tama!” Solo wants Jacob to lower his tone, but Jacob says okay. Let him be very clear with them. When it comes to Braun Strowman, Jacob WILL be the last man standing. Y’all better get in where you fit in, cuz that US title? Oh, Jacob’s bringing it home to the family. And he will do it with them, or without them! Yadada mean? Fatu heads out, is the Samoan Werewolf no longer following Solo?
Naomi speaks.
“I mean… How did we even get here? I don’t know. One thing that I do know is that I’ve always been the woman to do the right thing. I’ve always been the woman to do the right thing. So Bianca, what makes you think that my attack on Jade was anything different from me doing the right thing? When I sit here and I think about all that I’ve sacrificed, all that I’ve given, and that’s what really breaks my heart. Because through all of that, I’m made to be the bad one in this situation. I just don’t understand, how does Jade come in outta nowhere and take my place with you? I want you to ask yourself this, Bianca. Who inspired you? Hmm?
“Who’s inspired women over the last decade? Who’s always had your back from day one of you being here? Me. Not Jade. Hmm. But you know what? What I’ve learned through all of this: You teach people how to treat you. And I’m done with being treated as a third wheel. I’m done being pushed to the side, I’m done with being too nice, I’m done with being undervalued, underutilized, underappreciated! So moving forward, hmm… Moving forward, here’s my message to you, Jade. If you continue to be in my way, I strongly advise you to proceed with caution.” The Glow shows her dark side, but will the storm be moved?
Nick Aldis meets with Jade Cargill.
Speaking of, the SmackDown General Manager understands things have been rather difficult for her as of late. Jade says she’s been trying to get her hands on Naomi for the past few weeks, now where is she? No one has seen her all day, so as far as anyone knows, Naomi’s not here. Well, when Jade catches Naomi, it’s on sight. Jade leaves, B-Fab & Michin are there. They let her know that what Naomi did to her was straight trash, totally uncalled for behavior. And after Jade gets her hands on Naomi, she’ll handle that business. Jade agrees. Mia says they’ve all got business to handle. Jade’s got Naomi, and Mia’s gonna get Charlotte for messing with her girl, B.
B-Fab says Naomi’s got what’s coming to her: no sympathy, no regrets. Jade, just do what you gotta do. Oh, she will. Jade also wishes Mia luck tonight. Mia & B-Fab head out, will the Head Baddie in Charge make the Queen bow down in London?
The darkness approaches.
“You are as I was. As I am, you will be.” The shadows are starting to take shape, but is SmackDown about to fade to black?
Charlotte Flair VS Mia Yim w/ B-Fab!
The Queen looks down on everyone, so it’s no surprise that everyone else wants to take her down. Charlotte may have checked off B-Fab, but will the HBIC be a much different story? Or will Charlotte only sharpen her edge before facing Tiffany Stratton at WrestleMania?
WAIT! NAOMI ATTACKS B-FAB & MICHIN! Naomi drags Mia up for a FACEBUSTER! Naomi rains down fists, the ref reprimands and the fans boo, but Naomi tells the ref to back off. Naomi then BOOTS B-Fab off the apron! Naomi goes out after B-Fab to THRWO her into barriers! Naomi SLAPS B-Fab, tells her to stay down, but B-Fab gets up. Naomi fires hands, then she SMACKS B-Fab off the desk! Naomi rains down fists, but here comes Jade! Jade hurries down the ramp, she runs around the way, but Naomi runs away! Jade makes sure B-Fab is okay, but refs have to help her to the back. And what of Mia? Will she even be able to compete?
Charlotte makes her entrance, not really caring about what Naomi just did to Mia. But that means she also crosses paths with Jade. The fans like the look of this stare down, but Jade and Charlotte both let the other slide. Charlotte gets her pyro, and it seems she’ll still get her match. Will Mia be little more than an appetizer now?
The bell rings, and Charlotte BOOTS Mia down! Cover, TWO! Mia stays in this and the fans rally up. Charlotte just struts around while SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns, Charlotte has Mia down with a chinlock, but the fans rally up. Mia fights up, fires body shots, and she then blocks a shot to ROCK Charlotte! Mia ROCKS Charlotte again and again, then reels her in for a TORNADO DDT! The fans fire up as Mia hurries to cover, TWO! Mia drags Charlotte up, wrenches, but Charlotte says no to Da Feet! BIG back suplex! Mia stagger sup, Charlotte whips her, but Mia reverses! Charlotte goes up and out, BOOTS her away, then slingshots in and rolls Mia! Mia rolls through and BUZZSAWS! Mia runs corner to corner, but Charlotte avoids the cannonball!
Charlotte YAKUZA KICKS Mia down, then fires herself up! The fans “WOO~!” as Charlotte has Mia in the drop zone,. Charlotte steps on her, goes up the corner, but Mia gets underneath her! SIT-OUT POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO! Charlotte survives and Mia is shocked! Mia nods as the fans rally back up, and she brings Charlotte up. But Charlotte ROCKS Mia! Mia SOBATS, PELES, and then runs to PENALTY KICK! Cover, TWO! Charlotte stays in this, Mia grows frustrated, but the fans continue to rally. Mia uses that energy to stay focused, and she stalks Charlotte to waistlock. But Charlotte ELBOWS her away!
Charlotte CHOPS, and CHOPS, and CHOSP! Charlotte winds up, and she CHOPS again! Mia sputters, but then she dodges the boot! Charlotte is caught, and Mia hits a SAIDO! Charlotte flounders to a corner, the fans rally behind Mia, and Mia runs up, CANNONBALL! Mia hurries to wrench and EAT- NO, Charlotte shoves Mia away! Charlotte gets under, back suplexes, but Mia lands out! EAT DA FEET!! Cover, ROPEBREAK!! Charlotte’s long legs help her survive by a literal foot! Mia is beside herself while Charlotte bails out. Mia storms after Charlotte, runs up, but Charlotte dodges! Mia’s kick hits steel steps!
Mia hobbles away, goes to the apron, but Charlotte CHOP BLOCKS the bad leg out! Charlotte grabs Mia’s leg, drops a KNEE on the knee, but fans chant, “We Want Tiffy!” Charlotte just steps through, FIGURE FOUR, into FIGURE EIGHT!! Mia taps, Charlotte wins!
Winner: Charlotte Flair, by submission
Charlotte got more of a fight out of Mia than expected, but she still won. Will The Queen be more than ready to reign again after WrestleMania?
Backstage interview with Tiffany Stratton.
Jackie Redmond is with the WWE Women’s Champion and says Charlotte certainly looks confident. Let’s be real, Charlotte came at Tiff pretty hard. It got a lot of people talking. Tiff says yes, people talk. And Charlotte sure loves to hear herself talk. Ten years into the business and Charlotte is still so insecure that she can’t let a “rookie” get a word out. But last week, Tiff did learn something: She learned that walking into WrestleMania, she isn’t the one with something to lose. Truth is, if Tiff loses, then she lost to the great Charlotte Flair, as just a 25-year-old rookie with one year into SmackDown.
But if Charlotte loses… Well, then she lost to an “undeserving, delusional, unoriginal, backflip doing, blonde-hair-having, little girl.” Did she get it all? And Tiff can’t wait to hear the look on Charlotte’s face when they hear the words, “And STILL!” Then maybe Charlotte will finally shut up for the sake of literally everyone! They say what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, and Tiff will make damn sure what stays is Charlotte’s massive ego. Tiff is walking into and out of Mania as the WWE Women’s Champion. Tootles! Tiff heads out, will it still be #TiffyTime after WrestleMania?
Randy Orton VS Drew McIntyre!
The Viper told Cody how proud he was, but also how he wants the next shot after John Cena. The Scottish Terminator took offense to that, and basically said he is taking that shot instead. Will this match be an unofficial #1 contender’s match between these two former world champions?
SmackDown returns and McIntyre makes his entrance. The bell rings and the fans sing, “OH~, Drew McIntyre~!” and chant “R K O! R K O!” Drew and Orton circle, tie up, and they go around in a deadlock. Drew powers Orton to a corner, but Orton headlocks back. Drew powers up and out, then he runs Orton over! Orton hurries to ropes and Drew mockingly asks, “How’s the back feel, Randy?” Orton stands, he and Drew reset, and the fans duel some more. Drew calls for a knuckle lock, Orton accepts, but then Drew kicks low! Drew bumps Orton off buckles, then climbs up, but he panders for too long and Orton YANKS him down!
The fans fire up as Orton climbs now! Orton rains down fists, and the fans count to nine. Orton hops down, brings Drew around, and POSTS him for ten! Drew tumbles out of the ring, Orton goes out after him, and they’re by the desk! But Drew kicks Orton first and SMACKS him off the desk! Drew clears the desk, and he brings Orton up for the DESK- NO, Orton fights free! Orton turns things around, DESK BACK SUPLEX for Drew! The fans fire up while Orton leaves Drew behind, and SmackDown goes picture in picture.
Drew writhes on the floor, but Orton goes out to fetch him! Orton brings Drew around, UPPERCUTS him, then says one more time! DESK BACK SUPLEX! Drew writhes as that desk stays standing! Orton grins, refreshes the ring count, and then he storms up on Drew. Drew pokes Orton in the eye! Drew POSTS Orton now, then brings him around to RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP into barriers! Orton slumps down, and Drew also grits his teeth from that double-edged attack, but Drew fires up as he stands tall. Drew drags Orton up, puts him in the ring, then stalks Orton. Drew looms over Orton, and HIP DROPS him!
Orton sputters, Drew says one more time, and he winds up for the HIP DROP! Drew paces around Orton, says maybe one more time, and he pretends he can’t hear the fans. Drew winds up again, but Orton flips over! Hip drop meets kneecaps! And then Orton pokes Drew in the eyes! The ref reprimands but Orton rises up. Drew sputters and flounders, Orton ROCKS him with a right! Drew ROCKS Orton back! Drew storms up, Orton kicks low, but Drew fires another haymaker! The haymakers go back and forth, Orton gets the edge, but Drew GLASGOW KISS HEADBUTTS! Cover, TWO! Drew clamps onto Orton with an armlock!
SmackDown returns to single picture and the fans rally up. Orton fights up, pries at the chinbar, and then throws right hands! Drew CHOPS Orton in return! The fans “WOO~” and Drew winds up. Drew ROCKS Orton again, eggs him on, then CHOPS again! Drew shoves Orton to a corner, CHOPS again, then dares Orton to fight! Drew whips corner to corner, but Orton comes back to LARIAT! And LARIAT! Drew swings, Orton dodges, SNAP POWERSLAM! The fans fire up as Orton stalks Drew to the apron. Drew HOTSHOTS Orton first! Drew then runs in, but Orton puts him through the ropes!
The fans fire up as Orton has Drew for the DRAPING DDT! The fans fire up for Orton, and Orton hears those voices! Drew rises, but then Orton spots KEVIN OWENS! The Prizefighter is on the ramp, Orton glares at him, but then he turns around into a CLAYMORE!! Cover, DREW WINS!
Winner: Drew McIntyre, by pinfall
Kevin’s mere presence costs Orton, and now Drew has a huge win propelling him down the Road to WrestleMania! As for Orton, Kevin drags him out of the ring, SMACKS him off the desk, and then climbs up to join him! The fans boo but Kevin and his hot pink sneakers have Orton in position, but Orton slips free and TRIPS Kevin up! Kevin hits the desk then the floor! Orton staggers around, the fans rally behind him, and Orton stalks Kevin to the corner of the barriers. Orton lines up the shot! Orton runs in, but Kevin jumps over barriers! Security is there to stop Orton from pursuing, so Kevin runs away into the night!
The fans boo, but The Viper was that close! Will Orton be able to strike Kevin down and completely take him out?
Fire, thunder, smoke…
The force of nature is drawing ever closer. And he’s ready to fly! REY FENIX arrives next Friday Night SmackDown!
Jimmy Uso VS The Miz!
#BigJim gave Gunther a piece of his mind and a mark on his cheek, but it seems not everyone got the message. Will the Hollywood A-lister soon star in the Uso Penitentiary? Or will he prove Jimmy is NOT ready for a world champion level opponent?
The bell rings and the two tie up. Jimmy powers Miz to a corner, Miz turns things around, and the ref counts. Miz takes a swing, Jimmy ducks it to CHOP! And CHOP! Miz shoves Jimmy back, then runs up, but Jimmy TACKLES Miz! Jimmy rains down fists, Miz shoves him away to go to ropes, but Jimmy storms back up. Miz ELBOWS Jimmy away, then runs back up, only for Jimmy to LARIAT him down! The fans fire up while Jimmy storms up on Miz. Jimmy CHOPS Miz, has him in a corner, then whips corner to corner. Miz reverses, Jimmy goes up and over, then UPPERCUTS! Miz staggers back to ropes, but Jimmy is right on him.
Jimmy whips, Miz reverses and kitchen sink knees! Then basement BOOTS! The fans fire up, Miz scowls, and Miz KNEES Jimmy in the back again and again. Miz stalks Jimmy to the ropes now, and he CHOKES Jimmy! The ref counts, Miz runs, and Miz STRADDLE ATTACKS! The fans boo, but Miz runs again. Jimmy ducks the boot, then dodges a lariat! Jimmy runs up to LARIAT Miz up and out! The fans fire up and Jimmy builds speed, but Miz runs away! Jimmy smirks as he goes out the side, and UPPERCUTS Miz over the barriers! Jimmy makes sure Gunther knows he’s coming to get him, but SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns and both men are down. Miz and Jimmy crawl, and Jimmy pounds the mat. The fans rally, Jimmy rises and runs up to LARIAT! And LARIAT! And mule kick! Jimmy then UPPERCUTS Miz, dodges a lariat, then SAMOAN DROPS! The fans fire up, Jimmy goes to the corner, “UCE! OH!” Jimmy runs in, but Miz puts him on the apron! Jimmy UPPERCUTS again! Jimmy climbs, leaps, but Miz gets under! Miz then waistlocks, ripcords, and MOVIE MAKER! Fans boo that blatant parody, but Miz full nelsons! Jimmy drops, victory rolls, TWO! Miz has the cover, TWO! Miz hurries to BASEMENT DDT! Cover, TWO!
The fans rally up as Jimmy survives! Miz stalks Jimmy, the fans rally up more, and Miz fires a KICK! And then another KICK! The fans say “YES! YES! YES!” to the It Kicks, but then Miz winds up. Jimmy ducks the buzzsaw, Miz blocks the superkick, but the DRAGON WHIP connects! Miz rebounds to B-MOVIE KNEE!! Cover, TWO!! The parodies don’t get it done, but Miz still has his original work to fall back on. The fans rally for “UCE! OH! UCE! OH!” Miz runs in, A-LIST LARIAT! Miz shoves Jimmy down, then springboards, but into a SUPERKICK! Jimmy hurries up top, for the USO SPLASH!! Cover, Jimmy wins!
Winner: Jimmy Uso, by pinfall
Miz may be a movie star, but Big Jim’s the one winning this main event! Jimmy then borrows Joe Tessitore’s headset to call out Gunther! He’s coming after dat ass on Monday! Gunther won’t be the ring general, he will be “Private Gunther,” and he will salute Big Jim! Uh, uh, YEET! Will Jimmy be the one making examples out of the World Heavyweight Champion? Or will everything come crashing down when Gunther gets his turn?
Drew McIntyre returns backstage.
And he says hey to Lewis Capaldi, the Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter, and also a big fan of Drew’s. They’re ready to have a good night in the pub, but Jackie Redmond walks over to congratulate him on the win tonight. She was hoping to get some thoughts on that victory and what happened with Orton and Kevin. Drew says it’s alright, this is what happens. He doesn’t care about anybody else’s business, but no one gets away with screwing him over. And when no one meddles in his business, he wins! Drew called out Priest, where is he? Priest doesn’t have the balls! So time to get mad in the pubs, everyone’s invited!
Drew turns the corner, but PRIEST IS THERE! Priest ROCKS Drew, SMACKS him off the door, then throws him into road cases! Priest ROCKS Drew, SMACKS him off the trunk of a car, and then again! Or since it’s London, “the boot.” The driver complains, but Priest BODY SLAMS that guy through a table! Drew comes back to KNEE Priest low, SMACK him off the trunk, and then off the side! They go to the hood, or bonnet for UK. Drew drags Priest up, but Priest CLAWS Drew’s eyes! Priest then sends Drew SOUTH OF HEAVEN through the windshield! Priest tells security that he’s done for now. Any more jokes, Drew? Didn’t think so! RIP, jackass!
Priest leaves, the producers hurry to help Drew, and Drew’s got glass in his eye! Will that glass help Drew see why he shouldn’t piss off the Punisher?
CM Punk heads to gorilla.
He has a security detail with him, and he passes by Drew writhing in pain. Punk chuckles, then continues on. Will his contract signing with Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins be just as brutal? We find out, after the break.
Nick Aldis is in the ring.
The SmackDown General Manager welcomes us back, and says it is his honor and privilege to be here in the O2 in London. Now, we all know why he and this table is here, and why additional security is here tonight. Tonight, we are here to sign a contract for a Triple Threat. Perhaps the biggest Triple Threat in the history of WrestleMania: Seth Rollins VS CM Punk VS Roman Reigns! The fans cheer all those names, and here comes the OTC! London puts the ones up, and Paul Heyman accompanies THE Tribal Chief out on stage. Roman raises his finger to the sky for the pyro, then security follows him to the ring.
SmackDown goes picture in picture as Roman’s entrance continues, and he raises his finger to the sky for the second round of pyro. Roman steps into the ring, SmackDown returns to single picture, and Heyman hands him a mic. The fans sing, “ROMAN! ROMAN REIGNS~!” Roman nods, the fans cheer, and now they chant, “O T C! O T C!” Roman tells London, “ACKNOWLEDGE ME!” The fans cheer again, and again chant, “O T C! O T C!” Roman smiles, but he sees the chairs are not to his liking. Heyman makes sure to put one at the head of the table. Heyman also dusts the chair off while Roman enjoys the singing of, “ROMAN! ROMAN REIGNS~!”
Roman takes a seat and says that was beautiful. The way they sing to their Tribal Chief, it’s just beautiful. The singing continues, and Heyman even joins in! Roman smiles, and he says that is what he’s talking about. That’s the OTC for you, baby! The biggest star on the planet! The OTC came here for two reasons. One: to be acknowledged; check! And two: to sign this contract. Roman does just that, and he says he’s checked both boxes. That means- “BURN IT DOWN!” Seth Rollins interrupts! The fans now sing, “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~!” Rollins struts out in his red wine paisley suit and conducts the O2 Choir all the way into the ring.
The fans cheer while Roman frowns, but Rollins takes the seat to Roman’s left. Rollins offers Heyman a chance to sing to this song, but Heyman frowns. Rollins chuckles, and he says the fans do have beautiful singing voices. He doesn’t know why Roman is in such a hurry to leave, though! This is their building! There’s a lot of history here! 12 years ago, they landed on the roof of this place in a helicopter! They came down those stairs over there, “ready to burn down the old guard!” They put the Undertaker down through the desk, and they were going to remake this company in their image!
Now don’t get him wrong, Rollins knows a lot has happened since then. They fought against each other, with each other, a little bit of love and a whole lot of hate. But Rollins dare says, as the fans continue to sing “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~,” that Rollins and Roman accomplished their mission. The fans start to chant for CM Punk, but Rollins tunes them out. Roman says, “We? We? You keep saying we. Our mission? We died a long time ago. It’s only been ME. You been here, but I done all the work! I’ve made this place what it is today! I took us to the level that we are here today! I made this place better than we found it!
“I’m the one that made us desirable to Netflix! I’m the one that took us into billion-dollar deals! Tell me, what have you done?” Rollins shouts, “I’ll tell you what I’ve done! YOU, YOU, YOU, it’s that mindset that keeps me having to screw you! You understand that? And your biggest mistake is not understanding the danger that’s right in front of us! The danger that’s right in front of you! You let the biggest snake in the world, CM Punk, into the garden! And you could’ve cut his head off at WarGames! But instead, you shook his hand. You could’ve let me finish him inside the cage at The Garden, but you didn’t. And now, I am left to do what I always do: Clean up your mess, again.”
Rollins drops his mic, picks up the pen, and signs his part. And now, here comes CM PUNK! The fans fire up and sing along with Cult of Personality, then join in on saying, “IT’S CLOBBERIN’ TIME~!” Punk goes to the ring, but as he grabs a mic, he goes up a corner, just like he did last Friday. “I have come here to chew bubblegum and sign a contract. And I’m all outta bubblegum.” The fans cheer the Rowdy Roddy Piper reference, and Punk hops down to take his seat on Roman’s right. Punk looks over said contract, but Roman asks if Punk needs a highlighter or something. What’s he doing? Just go to page four, clause five.
Punk does as Roman says, but Roman says Punk needs to hurry, this is precious TV time. Punk reads the segment, Roman tells Heyman to just smarten Punk up. Heyman tells Punk he knows what Punk is looking for. It is in there. They’re closing the show at WrestleMania. The fans go wild hearing that! Heyman tells Punk that he gets to live his dream of dreams. CM Punk will be a WrestleMania main eventer! The fans cheer and while Roman smiles, Rollins is furious. Roman says, “One man’s dream is another man’s favor! CHECK!” Wait, this was the favor? Rollins says no! This is not something to laugh at, and Punk does not get to tear up!
Punk is NOT deserving! He does NOT deserve this! The fans boo but Rollins continues to throw a fit! Main eventing WrestleMania is SACRED, the most important thing in the world to Rollins! More than anything! Except the fact that Punk NEVER gets to main event! This is all Roman’s fault! This is all Heyman’s fault! Rollins THROWS his mic down, paces angrily, but Punk picks up the mic. The fans cheer Punk on again, and Punk stands to thank London, to thank Chicago, to thank Louisville, Kentucky, and to thank ALL the fans. As corny as it sounds, he thanks the WWE Universe who stood by him and chanted his name for TEN LONG YEARS!
Roman says hold on, hold on. Punk shouldn’t be thanking the fans! He should be thanking the Tribal Chief! It is because of Roman that Punk gets this honor! So please, take this moment, close the show with that acknowledgement! Do this the right way. The credits are already rolling as Punk kneels before Roman!? Punk smiles, and he thanks “My Tribal Chief, the holder of the ula fala, the Head of the Table, the… Big Dog? Thank you for allowing a kid from Chicago to be graced by your presence. Thank you, My Tribal Chief, for allowing me to stand in your ring. And thank you so much. Thank you, Roman Reigns, so very much.
“But because of you, I will see you in the main event of WrestleMania.” And again, Rollins is agonizing over this. Punk finishes putting his signature on the contract, and London tells him, “You Deserve It!” Punk thanks Roman again, and then says, “But that’s not the favor that I’m owed.” WHAT?! Roman looks at Heyman and Heyman can’t look him in the eye! If getting this Triple Threat made into the main event isn’t the gift of the Wise Man, then what is?!
My Thoughts:
A good SmackDown, but they pulled off quite the paradox. They made it feel like they were struggling to fill three hours, yet they also filled the show to the point where that contract signing segment was almost bleeding over the three hour mark. Ironically, part of the problem was just how excited the London crowd was for this. The superstars still wanted to enjoy the chants and songs, but that’s time SmackDown doesn’t have to spare. It made the opening promo from Cody, Orton and Drew take longer, and it kinda did the same to the contract signing at the end. Even so, we still got a very good promo, and good stuff to set up Orton VS McIntyre.
Orton VS McIntyre was a great match, but of course Kevin costs Orton. McIntyre gets his win, Kevin and Orton have a bit of a brawl, but of course Kevin ends up on the losing end and runs off. McIntyre’s trash talk also comes back to bite him as Priest gets the better of him in their brawl. Here’s hoping Drew didn’t actually get glass in his eye, but that being the thing in kayfabe can be some good stuff. I can imagine McIntyre with an eyepatch, and he takes it off at the opportune time to get the better of Priest in their match. Also what a fitting choice for Punk to be passing by Drew suffering because of real glass.
Very good title matches tonight, but of course the status quo was kept. Pretty Deadly gets to look great here in London, but the Profits only just got the belts, they’re not going to be transitional champions like that. And Knight VS Braun was really good stuff, but honestly, Jacob Fatu going after them both should’ve been a given. Jacob also had a great promo with Solo & Tama to start adding to that divide between Jacob and Solo. I would hope Solo doesn’t screw Jacob out of the US Championship, but it feels like he will as Solo won’t stand for Jacob defying his authority, even though Solo’s been trying to make Jacob the champion all along.
Very good stuff from Jimmy Uso tonight, from his promo with #MeloDon’tMiz and then a great match with Miz. Their match ended up the de facto main event match, so that’s also great for both guys. Great win for Jimmy, but that’s likely because Jimmy is losing big time to Gunther on Monday. And it might just be me, but it feels like only now is the Jey VS Gunther build really moving, largely in part because Jimmy got involved. Jimmy’s promo after his match is something along the lines of what Jey should be saying. But I suppose as brothers, Jimmy is the one who knows Jey best and knows what Jey needs to be motivated again. And seeing Jimmy get beat up by Gunther will definitely motivate Jey…
Good final vignettes for Rey Fenix and Aleister Black. I’m a little surprised they confirmed Rey Fenix is showing up next week, and that they confirmed who Rey Fenix even is. I believe commentary confirmed Rey Fenix is Penta’s real brother, even namedropped “Lucha Brothers,” but all that is still surprising considering Fenix is going to start on SmackDown. Aleister’s vignette (at least I am fairly confident it’s his) was giving us glimpses of his silhouette, but I think there was usage of AI in the snake imagery. It was fine they did it for El Grande Americano because that is all trolling, but they really should try and do things the old fashioned way of photoshop and stock imagery.
Very good stuff in the Women’s Division tonight, though the WWE Women’s Championship portion was the weaker. Naomi’s got a great Heel persona going, her promo was great, and her going after B-Fab & Michin over them supporting Jade was a great detail. Jade runs Naomi off, helps B-Fab, but there was no helping Michin in being fed to Charlotte. Tiffany had a decent promo, and it does fit how Charlotte kept her from speaking so she finally gets things out here. It didn’t really add that much, though, but they already gave us a great brawl so not sure what more they can give.
KC Squared VS The Secret Her-vice was a very good match, but of course Chelsea made sure her team won. A Six Woman Tag of Zelina & KC Squared VS The Green Administration is certainly coming, to help give us Zelina VS Chelsea for the Women’s US Championship.
My Score: 8.7/10
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
Classic POD is WAR
Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
Powered by RedCircle
Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
Coverage
Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 3.27.2025
Bad news out of the TNA management side, but this is a taped episode from El Paso! So we won’t see any of the fallout just yet!
Now we all heard the news about the TNA change in hierarchy, and I…have no positive outlook on that. Delirious sucked at booking and creative in the dying days of ROH before it got bought as a B show. Dreamer having even more control is concerning because his ideas the last two years haven’t been much better.
Gail leaving makes more sense to me. Be it firing or a “you can’t quit, you’re fired” kind of situation, the Knockouts division is the worst it’s been in a long time and Gail was close with Scott D’Amore. So I don’t think Gail parting ways is as big of a problem since TNA has slowly been bleeding out with the Scott faithful.
Granted, I think the next few shows were already taped before the firing so things shouldn’t be completely unwatchable for at least a week or two. So let’s see where we’re going.
.@WeAreRosemary sends @XiaBrookside a CHILLING message!
WATCH #TNAiMPACT on TNA+: https://t.co/LaVxF6l2yc pic.twitter.com/srciTTbel0
— TNA Wrestling (@ThisIsTNA) March 28, 2025
Ratings:
- Gigi Dolin & Tatum Paxley vs Elegance Clique w/Personal Concierge: Ash wins via Rarefied Air – ** 1/4
- Fir$t Cla$$ & Frankie Kazarian vs Laredo Kid, Octagon Jr & Chavo Guerrero Jr: Chavo wins via Gory Bomb into Frog Splash – *** 1/4
- Jacy Jayne vs Masha Slamovich: Masha wins via Russian Death Device – ***
- Eric Young w/two losers vs Ace Austin: Eric wins via Piledriver – ** 1/2
- Seto & Mokuba – I mean – Nic Nemeth w/Ryan Nemeth vs Leon Slater: Nic wins via Danger Zone – *** 1/4
Results:
Gigi Dolin & Tatum Paxley vs Elegance Clique w/Personal Concierge
Ash and Gigi start off, Gigi with a little Rascalz after her first takedown. So both her and Wentz are making it obvious something’s going on between them, and I’m not mad at it. Good for my man Wentz.
Tatum and Gigi get some quick tandem offense in, Ash does manage to scurry off to a tag and Heather gets bent into a Pretzel. Some kind of Inverted Tarantula from Tatum, Gigi tags in, Bronco Buster on Heather followed by Kawada Kicks. Heather sells against the ropes, Gigi goes for a Hesitation Dropkick, but Concierge pulls her away so Gigi crashes and burns. Ref is distracted, Ash gets in some cheap shots and then the Elegant duo starts working over Gigi. A few quick tags, but once Heather comes in, Gigi fights out of the corner, gets the hot tag to Tatum. Tatum stacks up both Elegance members, Corner Stacked Crossbody, Butterfly Suplex and an Elbow Drop with some some flare. Tatum goes to the top rope, Heather pulls Gigi off the apron, Concierge shoves Tatum off the turnbuckle and Ash hits Rarefied Air for the win.
Post match the Elegance Clique wants to make their wish with the cake, they light the candles and Tatum and Gigi recover enough to do what we all expected last week, the cake in the face spot. Some…suggestive licking from both of our Hot Topic Hotties, so…no complaints here.
.@Ashamae_Sebera, @Heathereckless and @IamGeorgeIceman are having a meltdown!
WATCH #TNAiMPACT on TNA+: https://t.co/LaVxF6l2yc pic.twitter.com/FnKwPqm2ff
— TNA Wrestling (@ThisIsTNA) March 28, 2025
Fir$t Cla$$ & Frankie Kazarian vs Laredo Kid, Octagon Jr & Chavo Guerrero Jr
Chavo and Kaz start since he’s King Petty, a quick rope run turns into a Headscissor from Chavo. Kaz recovers, they lock up, Kaz hits the Knee Lift during the lock up to tag out to KC. KC pulls off some athletic dodges, gloats a bit so Chavo waits, measures and nails a gorgeous Dropkick. Laredo comes in on fire, quick high spots that send KC bouncing around like HBK against Hulk. KC powders after sells the Satellite Takedown, AJ checks on him and we go to commercial.
Back from commercial, Octagon is lighting up KC’s chest with overhand chops, he perches, Sunset Headscissor Flip from corner to corner, KC tries to Back Drop him but Octagon does a headstand, kicks KC away and lays him out with a high spot. AJ gets on the apron to stop Octagon from running the ropes, the referee has a stroke or something because he stops paying attention and AJ pulls Octagon out of the ring and chucks him. KC with the Tope con Hilo and tag (tag ropes haven’t mattered since the 80s we all know this). So AJ is getting taunted by the crowd in Spanish, but he’s manhandling Octagon since it looks like a Child fighting their parent. AJ knocks off Chavo and Laredo, Laredo pops up and tries to get involved but he’s caught on the shoulders, Octagon goes for the Crossbody but gets caught and AJ pulls off “World’s Strongest Wasteland” but Chavo breaks up the pinfall. AJ throws Octagon into the corner, Tennessee Whiskey, and tag out to KC. KC hits a few moves, but starts to lose the momentum until he connects with a Super Kick. Simultaneous rope run into the Dueling Crossbodies, so we get the timely tag outs from both sides. Kaz and Laredo come in, Laredo lands like two moves before Kaz hits a Sole Butt, Lariat and eats his lunch. KC and Kaz try to double team Laredo but he fights out and the crowd is chanting for Chavo.
Chavo tags in, and he’s rocking KC, Saito Suplex, Low Bridge to AJ, Reverse the Whip so Chavo goes to the corner and perches, KC feeds, Chavo Backflips to safety, rolls through and lays out KC. Chavo is feeling himself, 3 Amigos start on KC but only 2, Kaz comes in and Chavo switches to Kaz for the Amigos, only 2 again before AJ breaks it up. AJ goes for the disrespect, but Chavo counters and hits the 3 Amigos on the biggest Culero. Aztec Warriors dive to stop AJ and Kaz, KC tries a Dirty Victory Roll but Chavo kicks out. GORY BOMB into FROG SPLASH!
Chavo looked fantastic and he’s the one in the best shape in the ring. I wouldn’t be mad at more Chavito.
Jacy Jayne vs Masha Slamovich
I expect very little from this match.
Collar and Elbow, gator rolling for the first 30 seconds or so, then Jacy goes to some Hair Pull takedowns and does a little taunt before Masha pops back up and hits a Lariat into a Dive. Jacy sells it like she’s really hurt, even the ref tries to hold Masha back a little before Masha gets annoyed and just grabs her, Masha throws her in, looks for a Dive and Jacy sees it and powders. Masha tries to go back to the well for the Dive again but Jacy hits the Uppercut and then an Apron Run PK to drop Masha. Forearms rain down into a Foot Choke as Jacy continues to arrogantly play to the crowd. Another Foot Choke into a Cannonball, and near fall.
Masha gets space with a Sole Butt, tries to snap off Requiem but Jacy fights off, fights through a Sunset Flip another effective PK keeps Masha on her ass. Jacy looks for a kinda half-assed Camel Clutch as Masha is fighting up, but Jacy runs her into the corner, gets distracted mouthing off to the crowd, so Masha recovers, 5 Hole Up Kick sends Jacy into the corner, Yakuza Kick into Capo Kick for two. Requiem attempt again, but Jacy pushes off, a little back and forth, Masha tries a Backslide but Jacy gets away and hits a V-Trigger but only a 2 count. Jacy looks for the Discus Punch but Masha ducks it, they strike back and forth, but some dodges from both leave the exchange more even. Jacy with the Front Kick to the face sends Masha to the outside. Jacy wants another PK, but Masha blocks, Electric Chair Apron Snake Eyes. Masha throws her in, a PK into a near all. Requiem attempt 3, and thwarted from Jacy with a Superkick into a Neckbreaker. Senton misses from Jacy, Buzzsaw Kick, into Spinning Back Kick and Russian Death Device for the win.
Better than I expected, and Tessa attacks as soon as the bell rings. Xia Brookside and Lei Ying Li make the save after Tessa grabs the belt.
Eric Young w/two losers vs Ace Austin
Ace and Eric tie up, World of Sport start but as soon as Ace starts to get away EY punches him in the face. Eric looks at the camera and says “This is what trust looks like”, turns his back on Ace, when Ace looks to attack, the loser duo cut him off. EY takes advantage of the weird situation, but Ace with some Up and Over quick spots, into an Inside Cradle and La Magistral. EY kicks out of the quick flash attempts, but eats a Dropkick, and Ace goes all Speed Kils on him with fast strikes and then a face buster for another near fall. Strike spot very early in the match, Ace gets the best of it, goes for a Tear Drop Suplex but EY sits on it to block, Headlocks to keep him close and then a snap Lariat into beatdown bully tactics. EY takes the referee’s attention and one of the nerds punch Ace in the face.
Eric tries to lean on Ace, but Ace fires, a few strikes, Click Click Boom, the Miz Seated Lariats in the corner, Mochizuki Triangle Kick connects! Only a 2 count, but Ace seems to be in control. Ace puts EY on the ropes, a few strikes to keep him rocked, wants a Superplex, but EY blocks, bites the face and Macho Elbow gets a very close two count. EY tries the Piledriver but Ace turns it into a Jacknife Cradle,Spinning Heel Kick, calls for The Fold, but the losers hop on the apron to distract, Ace attacks them. Ace tries to time out the Triangle Kick again, but Eric dodges, throws Ace head first through the buckles. As Ace stumbles out of the corner, Piledriver, and it’s over.
Oh look it’s the “we’ll hear from Joe Hendry” segment. Again, I’ve loved this gimmick since Day 1, even didn’t hate his What Culture Pro stuff, but there is such a thing as milking a cow too much.
Elijah interrupts the whole “Who’s next” speech. When Elijah comes out he says he’s not the challenger and he believes in Joe. The crowd wants Elijah to turn on Hendry. Elijah pauses for a moment, and starts proving his friendship with stating his favorite color and a little “You Got a Friend in Me”. The crowd is into singing along and waving their cameras like Lighters to a 30 year old song. THANKFULLY Kaz breaks up the hug fest. Now he gets the “Culero” chant.
Kaz pulls out a Bass…what the hell is this Jam Session. Kaz has to warm up so he plays “La Cucaracha” on the bass. Kaz…is a national treasure. Hendry kicks Kaz out of the ring after his Heelish and playfully racially charged song choices. Kaz tries to sow dissension, but Joe and Elijah pinball Kaz between them. Kaz slips a power move and tries to shove Elijah into Joe but Elijah puts the brakes on, a small tense moment. But then Joe and Elijah play “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey, Goodbye”…and that goes right into a commercial. Oddly…perfect.
Nic Nemeth w/Ryan Nemeth vs Leon Slater
Nic shoots the half immediately for a flash pinfall but Leon kicks out at one. Nic continues to keep things grounded with his amateur wrestling skills, and then does a little Dolph Ziggler show off. So Nic isn’t really taking this seriously, and Leon starts getting the best of things with an Arm Wringer, into drag, Shoulder Tackle and rope run as Nic tries to Leap Frog and Leon puts on the brakes and just shoves Nic on his ass. Nic gets annoyed, a few strikes, grinds his face along the ropes, but Leon keeps stringing some offense together, Back Handspring Elbow into his Corner con Hilo.
Ahh the classic formula of the commercial gives the heel the advantage, Twisting Suplex from Leon stops Nic’s offense momentum, right hand, Leon lifts Nic up for something, Nic slips it, kicks him in the gut, looks for the FameAsser, but Leon catches him into a Blue Thunder Bomb variation. Slater wants the Swanton 450, but Nic powders. Leon tries to adjust into a Dive, but Nic cuts him off, counter for counter and a FameAsser out of the counters for a two count. Nic starts the big brother tactics, bootwashes and arrogance, Slater fires, punches into a Yakuza Kick. Leon wants another Lethal Injection variant, but Nic catches him into a Rear Naked Choke. Slater tries to turn it into a pin so Nic breaks it. Leon wants a Leg Lariat but misses and gets unceremoniously dropped by Nic. Nic puts Leon up on the buckles, Superplex possibly but Slater counters, tries to collect himself for a move, but Nic falls into the ropes to crotch Leon, and finally hits the Superplex.
Twist of Slate from Leon, Swanton 450 but knees get up. Locomotion Cradles from both but they kick out, Ryan picks the ankle to trip up Leon just a touch and then Danger Zone ends the match.
Ryan starts the post match beatdown, but the Hardy’s music hits and they come down to the ring for the save. Matt challenges the Nemeths for Rebellion because they’re not medically cleared yet.
Overall Score: 6.5/10
Decent story motion, no match was offensive, and there was actually some solid match action for television standards. I don’t have a ton to complain about aside from the Knockouts Division is in a weird spot, and giving Hendry a lot of just talking and hollow payoff segments feels stupid. If we need to hear from him every week, give him a talk segment like Highlight Reel or something. Yes I know First Class just got The Penthouse, but if Hendry is going to talk more than wrestle, give him a talk segment for us to sink our teeth into.
There was the announcement that Xia, Lei Ying and Masha will face Tessa, Jacy and a mystery partner. So you gotta wonder if there’s going to be another NXT mercenary, a surprise return or if it’ll just be Rosemary since she’s got her issues with Xia. Also I just realized that Unbreakable is going to be on a Thursday, seemingly after iMPACT? I’m gonna have to see how they do it, because if there’s an Impact episode and 2-3 hour PLE…I do not want to be awake until 1am. People need to work, and I will be Unwakeable if things go that long.
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
Classic POD is WAR
Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
Powered by RedCircle
Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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