It’s Week 17 of the NFL season and Steve Cook looks to improve upon his 5-win week last week. Can he kick it off with a successful Cowboys-Titans pick?

Hi, hello and welcome to Week 17 of the National Football League! I’m Steve Cook, and I must say that we are headed in the right direction around here. The good news is we got more than four picks right last week. The bad news?

We got five picks right last week.

Can we make it six this week? Let’s find out! Odds are via BetMGM as of early Wednesday evening. Also, Twitter’s acting funky tonight, so if all those Tweets aren’t there just act like they were all very informative and/or entertaining.

Thursday, December 29

Dallas (-11) at Tennessee

"In the next game… you must play in the fantasy championship without Derrick Henry." pic.twitter.com/5nAB89cNWT

— ESPN Fantasy Sports (@ESPNFantasy) December 28, 2022

This is the week where most fantasy leagues determine their champion. I know ESPN default settings do that two-week BS for the semis & the finals, and there are still some silly leagues out there that end on the last week of the regular season, but fantasy leagues with commissioners that know better do the thing on Week 17, and there’s no real reason to have two-week semis or finals. Get that stuff outta here. The reason most leagues try to avoid Week 18 finals is pretty much every team that has their stuff figured out for the postseason, which typically have most of the highest-scoring players, rest those players. So there was a year where I had to start noted 2000s Colts backup quarterback Jim Sorgi in a fantasy championship game. I still won, but it felt weird.

Folks who own Derrick Henry in a fantasy league and happen to be in a championship game have to be downright sick. Weeks ago, it seemed like the Titans would run away with the AFC South, and if Henry needed some resting it’d probably be in Week 18. Not so fast, my friends! The Titans have stumbled, bumbled and fumbled their way through a five-game losing streak, and are now in a position where they’re tied with the Jaguars and the only game that matters for them is Week 18’s tilt in Jacksonville. Since Henry has a hip injury, which is a tricky thing to be sure, there’s little reason to run him out there against a Cowboys defense that’ll do a better job against him than the Jags will. Fantasy owners don’t want to hear that, and if there’s anybody that can sympathize it’s me, but Mike Vrabel and whoever’s left in the Titans front office doesn’t care about your fantasy team.

Enough Titans are sitting this game out for me to tell you to pick the Cowboys in December. That’s where we’re at.

Sunday, January 1

Carolina at Tampa Bay (-3)

Fun fact: Mike Evans got ejected the last time he squared off against Josh Norman in a #Panthers uniform. pic.twitter.com/76I0NtFmxC

— Michael Rimmer (@avl_mike) December 27, 2022

I wasn’t really buying into the Josh Norman comeback until I heard from a couple of Panthers fans. They expect “at least one pick six”, along with “a Stone Cold Stunner for OBJ” after the game. I don’t expect OBJ to be there, but I wouldn’t have expected Josh Norman in this game either. The bad news for my Panthers friends is that Tom Brady is still going to the postseason by winning games in the 4th quarter against sub .500 teams. I guess take the Buccaneers, but I’m expecting this one to be a push.

Cleveland at Washington (-2)

Sources: #Commanders coach Ron Rivera has decided that QB Carson Wentz is now their starter against the #Browns. He’s informed the QBs of his move. pic.twitter.com/ssJUKzW5MY

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) December 28, 2022

The Taylor Heinicke Era seems to have come to a screeching halt. On one hand, I can’t really say the whole thing is his fault. It’s not like he’s throwing a ton of interceptions. On the other hand, some people are still in love with Carson Wentz’s mythical upside, and value that more than the steadiness of Heinicke. And there were those turnovers against the 49ers…but it’s not like the 49ers defense in any way resembles what Cleveland will be dragging to the nation’s capital.

I can’t tell you to take the Browns on the road, so we’re stuck with those darn Commies.

New Orleans at Philadelphia (-6.5)

So now the Saints have to play a pissed off Eagles team in Philly that’s not only playing for home field advantage,but making our draft pick they own even better… Cool… pic.twitter.com/zBZADScz92

— Barstool NOLA (@BarstoolNOLA) December 25, 2022

Eagles = PISSED OFF after blowing a game against their division rivals. That’s all ya need to know.

Arizona at Atlanta (-3.5)

“Cardinals’ QB Colt McCoy has cleared concussion protocol and is expected to start Sunday vs. the Falcons.”

DeAndre Hopkins’ fantasy football value in Week 17: pic.twitter.com/lCWdvHkCFA

— Moody (@EricNMoody) December 28, 2022

4-11 vs. 5-10. If you’re wagering on this one you might need to locate some information on Responsible Gaming. There’s no reason at all to bother with these two sorry, no account teams. If you have a problem? Well, Colt McCoy is at least an upgrade from Tracer Bullett, so take the road dogg Cardinals.

Jacksonville (-4.5) at Houston

Doug Pederson- “there’s never a meaningless game” – could rest guys who were injured, said there’s no one currently that falls in that category….

Plans on playing/coaching to win this week vs Texans #jaguars #duuuval #JAXvsHOU

— J.P. Shadrick (@jpshadrick) December 28, 2022

The Texans are coming off of a big win over the Titans this past week, and could be a spicy pick against most teams this week. Unfortunately for them, the Jaguars are among the hotter teams in the AFC right now, and look to carry their momentum into a Week 18 showdown with said Titans. There’s just one problem with that. The Texans have defeated the Jags nine times in a row, and in fifteen of their last seventeen matchups. Honestly, those two Jags wins were during the 2017 season, which I think we all agree didn’t really happen. Blake Bortles in an AFC Championship game? That had to be some type of a hallucination.

Take those pesky Texans to at least keep things close, even if they don’t keep the streak alive.

Chicago at Detroit (-6)

Matt Eberflus pointed to the opportunity for growth in these final two games as why the Bears won't sit Justin Fields. There certainly will be against a pair of porous defenses. The Lions are 32nd in yardage surrendered and the Vikings are 31st. Chance for him to finish strong.

— Chris Emma (@CEmma670) December 27, 2022

Last week’s Lions effort against Carolina was what we all deserved for believing in them for a minute. We all fell in love with those plucky youngsters with their excitable head coach, only to be reminded at the end of the day of who they really are. That said, this week they get to play the Bears. The Bears have been giving up more yards than anybody lately, which doesn’t bode well against a Lions team that usually has a competent offense. Detroit rolls into a Week 18 meeting with…well, let’s not dwell on that just yet.

Miami at New England (-3)

4 game losing streak for the Dolphins where they've scored 19, 19, 29, and 20 against playoff teams

After a 5 game winning streak where they beat the Steelers, Lions, Bears, Browns, and Texans

Fun team but oof

— Jake Liscow (@JakeLiscow) December 25, 2022

I love Teddy Bridgewater as much as anybody. I don’t love him this week against a Patriots defense that shut down the Bengals in the second half of their game last week. As much as that wacky funtime oddball coach of Miami’s says he wants it to be colder, they’ve done nothing but lose since the calendar flipped over to December. Methinks that continues in January.

Denver at Kansas City (-12.5)

Broncos Interim HC Jerry Rosburg on Russell Wilson playing against the Chiefs:

"We're going to do everything we can to put a game plan in place for Russell Wilson to be successful. … I'm really confident we're going to be able to do that."

— Aric DiLalla (@AricDiLalla) December 28, 2022

The question here isn’t who’s going to win. You, I & the family pet know that the Chiefs are winning this game. The Broncos have lost fourteen games in a row to the Chiefs, and are heading into this one without head coach…what the heck was his name? I’ve already forgotten. Something to do with hacking it? Hackert? Doesn’t matter. The question here: can Denver come within 12.5 against the mighty Chiefs in Arrowhead Stadium?

I’mma say no. The Broncos did one of those big comeback deals a couple of weeks ago, so the Chiefs will want to keep the boot down on them.

Indianapolis at NY Giants (-6)

Not only was the 1958 #NFL Championship the greatest game ever played, it had the greatest halftime show in #NFL history #Colts #Giants pic.twitter.com/HivSE4tvOp

— Old Time Football 🏈 (@Ol_TimeFootball) December 28, 2022

I’m somewhat surprised the NFL didn’t find a way to move this one to prime time. A potential playoff team in the New York/New Jersey market combined with a Colts team they’ve been running out in all of these national windows for weeks now, whether anybody asked to see them or not? Big Dick Nick’s return to East Rutherford? Woulda been gold, Jerry!

The Giants should be able to get it done against a Colts team looking to get their season done.

NY Jets (-1.5) at Seattle

Vegas loves them some Mike White. The opening line for the #Jets @ #Seahawks game was SEA -3.5. Once White was cleared to start it is now #Jets -2. That’s a 5.5 points swing.

— uSTADIUM (@uSTADIUM) December 27, 2022

Is it that we all love Mike White so much, or is Zach Wilson just that bad that White looks like the second coming of Chad Pennington by comparison? I don’t know. What I do know is that the Jets have lost four straight, the Seahawks have lost three straight, and even though both of these teams are still in playoff contention it’s tough to see either team getting in. One of them does have to win this week…unless there’s a tie!

When I’m in doubt, I pick against the team travelling across the country. I’ll take the Seahawks as the home doggs. Geno Smith gets his revenge, by gum!

San Francisco (-10) at Las Vegas

If I’m the @jets @HoustonTexans @Commanders @AZCardinals @panthers @Buccaneers @MiamiDolphins @Titans @falcons (insert team here). I’m calling the @raiders TODAY! ‘So about @derekcarrqb ?’

— Amber Theoharis (@AmberTheoharis) December 28, 2022

Can I pick Jarrett Stidham against one of the best teams currently in football? I can not. Roll with those rolling 49ers.

Minnesota at Green Bay (-3.5)

National media narratives:

“Vikings are frauds.. look their point differential +5.. Kirk Cousins is too inconsistent”

“Packers are on a roll.. look at their DVOA.. their point differential is -21 but that’s ok.. look at their DVOA”

Never listen to the national media #Skol pic.twitter.com/jUrmhB3CyY

— Rick Sosa (@sosarick) December 27, 2022

It’s a shame, really. We thought we were finally rid of Aaron Rodgers and all of his nonsense. The Packers were struggling for most of the season and didn’t seem to be heading anywhere near the playoffs. Now we’ve got the Packers riding a three game winning streak and only needing to beat two teams they always beat at Lambeau Field to get in. You know they will, even if one of them is 12-3 and sent Green Bay on an almost season-long tailspin back in Week 1.

No, it doesn’t make any sense. But the Packers will be in the postseason and we’ll have to listen to Rodgers’ mind-numbing drivel a little while longer.

LA Rams at LA Chargers (-6.5)

I hope the banners stay up for Rams vs Chargers pic.twitter.com/JGSMCk0GRT

— Fabian F.G. (@fabian_football) December 26, 2022

Who do I think will win the Battle of Los Angeles? Honestly, I haven’t watched any PWG in a long, long time. But if that’s the question I’ll gladly look at the first round matchups and do some prognosticating.

Bandido vs. Black Taurus vs. El Hijo del Vikingo: This is one of the annoying things about indy tournaments. They want to do the biggest matches they can, but sometimes they only way that can happen is to have somebody important lose in the first round just so they can advertise a match in advance. In this case, PWG is having two important people lose in one first round match. It’ll probably be better than anything else on the show, but it’s still not ideal.

Daniel Garcia vs. Titus Alexander: I assume Titus is Cedric’s younger brother, so this should be pretty pretty pretty good.

Michael Oku vs. Konosuke Takeshita: Takeshita’s a fun kid. AEW might get around to doing something with him by 2027.

Jordynne Grace vs. Jonathan Gresham: I don’t want to be the crotchety old man that can’t get behind what the cool kids like. To be honest, intergender wrestling doesn’t even bother me much. It just gets a little weird when you have folks that are known to be husband & wife fighting each other. It’s either uncomfortable because it gives the impression of a domestic dispute, or you’re kinda grossed out because you realize this is their idea of foreplay. So yeah, I don’t want anything to do with this.

Aramis vs. Shun Skywalker: Shun is not related to Luke or Leia, and Aramis is not Amasis of Osirian Portal fame. So I’m not sure what to make of this.

Alex Shelley vs. Masha Slamovich: If this was a shoot fight, I’d put my money on Masha. All due respect to Alex, but that’s one tough woman.

SB Kento vs. Lio Rush: Rush is still getting booked? Well good for him.

Latigo vs. Komander: Komander’s been fun on the AAA shows I’ve seen him on. I don’t think I’m familiar with Latigo, but he seems like the kind of wrestler that would have a spotfest with Komander.

TBA vs. TBA (winner faces “Speedball” Mike Bailey on Night 2): I hope it’s Super Dragon.

If I was booking the thing I would put Hijo del Vikingo over, he’s got more hype than pretty much anybody right now. Sometimes these promoters like to change things up and have the hyped guy put their local yokel over, but PWG doesn’t need to. Oh, and the Rams are going to keep things close.

Pittsburgh at Baltimore (-2.5)

Bought tickets to the Ravens vs Steelers game and my credit card flagged it as fraud three times

— big honkin caboose (@itsmegangraves) December 28, 2022

Shockingly, the Steelers came back to win on Saturday night. It was one of the things I got right! They remain in the playoff picture, I don’t expect they’ll get in but it’s kind of annoying. Meanwhile, Lamar Jackson still isn’t practicing. People try to tell me that the Ravens are fine without him, and they have scored some wins over inferior competition, but I’m still not sold on them. I’m not sold on the Steelers either, but their getting to .500 seems pre-ordained at this point.

Monday, January 2

Buffalo (-1.5) at Cincinnati

Bills (12-3) at Bengals (11-4): a historic Monday Night Football matchup 🔥 pic.twitter.com/GkIK3n0D63

— Field Yates (@FieldYates) December 28, 2022

Let’s hope this one lives up to the hype. Bengals fans have had this one marked on the ol’ calendar since the schedule was released. Sports betting becomes legal in Ohio on January 1, so this will be the first Bengals game that local fans can legally bet on without driving to Indiana. Gonna be a big night!

Shame the Bills are unbeatable. We said it at the beginning of the season, and we say it now. Nobody can beat these guys. I can’t wait to hear Josh Allen’s Super Bowl speech!

Week 16 Results: 5-11
Overall Results: 108-126-7