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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (3/6/23)

John Cena returns to Raw!

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The Champ! Is! HEEEERE!

Raw is in Boston, so Boston’s own JOHN CENA returns! And Austin Theory is surely wanting to talk with him. Will The Now see Cena in the ring?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Kevin Owens VS Solo Sikoa w/ Jimmy Uso; Kevin wins.
  • Bianca Belair VS Carmella w/ Chelsea Green; Bianca wins.
  • Omos w/ MVP VS Dolph Ziggler; Omos wins.
  • Johnny Gargano w/ Dexter Lumis VS Finn Balor w/ The Judgment Day; Gargano wins.
  • Nikki Cross VS Piper Niven; Piper wins.
  • Baron Corbin VS Chad Gable w/ Otis; Gable wins.
  • Sami Zayn VS Jimmy Uso w/ Solo Sikoa; Sami wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

The Bloodline arrives backstage.

The Wise Man, Solo Sikoa and Jimmy Uso are in town, they’ve got some problems to take cdare of. And Paul Heyman tells them that one more time from the top. Jimmy heard Roman Reigns last Friday. He was very explicit. Solve the Sami Zayn problem. And you know what happened? Sami Zayn escaped! Which means Sami survived, which means Sami is here live in Boston tonight. This means opportunity for the Bloodline. So Solo, he will solve the Kevin Owens problem tonight while Jimmy, whether Jey comes to his senses or not, will solve the Sami Zayn problem once and for all. Yeet. But as they head out, Heyman puts in the call to the Tribal Chief.

 

Kevin Owens VS Solo Sikoa!

The Prizefighter knows what’s coming, because you never face just one member of the Bloodline. The Enforcer of the Island will still have back-up, but will Kevin #JustKeepFighting until he’s beaten down The Bloodline?

The moment Solo’s through the ropes, Kevin goes after him! They spill out to the ramp and Kevin whips Solo into barriers! Kevin fires off more hands, then whips Solo, only for Solo to reverse and POST Kevin! Solo snarls, storms up on Kevin, and he throws haymakers! Solo POSTS Kevin again, Kevin gets in the ring, and Solo pursues. The bell rings, but Kevin TACKLES Solo! Kevin rains down fists, fires forearms, whips, but Solo reverses to CLOBBER Kevin! S0lo stomps Kevin, HEADBUTTS him, then stalks him to ropes. Solo CHOKES Kevin, the ref counts, and Solo lets off with a CLUBBING forearm!

Fans rally for Kevin and Kevin CHOPS! Kevin fires off hands, runs, but into a WHEEL KICK from Solo! Fans boo but Solo snarls. Solo sits Kevin up to HEADBUTT him again. Solo DECKS Kevin, then KICKS him in the back. Fans boo but Kevin throws hands! Solo DECKS Kevin again! Cover, ONE!! Kevin SLAPS Solo! Solo BOOTS Kevin down! Solo stomps away on Kevin in the corner but lets off as the ref counts. Solo drags Kevin but Kevin grabs the ropes. The ref counts, Solo stomps Kevin in the stomach! Solo snarls and fans boo, but Solo grinds his fingers into Kevin’s face in the corner. The ref counts and Solo lets off again.

Solo stomps Kevin but Kevin kicks back! And CHOPS! And ROCKS Solo with forearm after forearm! Kevin runs, but Solo kitchen sink knees him down! It gets Kevin rather low, and Solo adds a FALLING HEADBUTT! Cover, TWO! Solo looms over Kevin, drags him up by his beard and clamps on a chinlock. Fans rally as Kevin endures and reaches out. Kevin fights up, throws body shots, then ROCKS Solo! Kevin whips, Solo reverses but Kevin KCIKS him! And LARIATS! Solo stays up! Kevin LARIATS again, then stomps Solo’s foot! Kevin kicks Solo, then LARIATS! Solo drops, and Kevin drops a SENTON!

Fans fire up as Kevin goes corner to corner! But Solo bails out before the cannonball hits. Kevin goes out, to CLOBBER Solo! Boston is thunderous as Kevin looms over Solo. Kevin puts Solo back in, but here comes Jimmy! Jimmy gets on the apron to distract, and Solo UPPERCUTS Kevin! Solo ROCKET LAUNCHES Kevin off the corner! Solo runs in to HIP ATTACK!! Kevin flounders out of the ring but Solo goes out after him. Solo runs in, HIP ATTACK into the barriers! Fans boo but Solo soaks it up as Raw goes picture in picture.

Solo stares down the fans as they rally for Kevin. Solo drags Kevin up and into the ring, steps back in, and he paces around Kevin. Kevin crawls to ropes, and Solo CHOKES him again! The ref counts, Solo lets off, and now Jimmy gets a cheap shot in! Solo looms over Kevin while Jimmy talks trash with fans. Solo springboard stomps Kevin down! Solo and Jimmy taunt the fans, but the fans rally up for Kevin. Solo swings on Kevin but Kevin counter punches! Kevin fires forearms, Solo DECKS him! Jimmy applauds while Solo stomps Kevin again. Kevin grabs ropes but Solo stomps him again. Solo CHOKES Kevin on the ropes, but lets off as the ref counts.

Kevin goes to a corner, then gets up to SUPERKICK! Solo staggers after Kevin as he goes outside. Kevin trips Solo on the apron! Solo rolls into the ring, Kevin hurries to SENTON, but gets knees! Kevin crawls to a corner, Raw returns to single picture, and Solo throws down hands! The ref counts, Solo throws headbutts but lets off at 4. Solo hoists Kevin up top, climbs up after him, and fans boo as Solo brings Kevin up. But Kevin resists! Kevin throws body shots, and a HEADBUTT! Solo wobbles, Kevin ELBOWS him down! Kevin then hurries, but runs into a SAMOAN DROP! Cover, TWO! Kevin is still in this but Solo keeps his focus.

Solo goes to the opposite corner, he runs in, but Kevin avoids the splash! Then hits a DDT! Both men are down and fans fire back up! Jimmy looks around, watching for both Sami and Jey. Kevin fires off forearms on Solo! Solo UPPERCUTS back! Solo runs in at the corner, Kevin dodges and Solo POSTS himself! Kevin kicks but Solo denies the stunner! Kevin BLASTS Jimmy off the apron! Kevin blocks Solo’s boot to SUPERKICK! And SUPERKICK! Solo is in the corner, Kevin CANNONBALLS! Fans fire up as Kevin climbs up! SWANTON BOMB!! Cover, JIMMY BREAKS IT!

Winner: Kevin Owens, by disqualification

The fans boo as Jimmy stomps away, but this isn’t about wins or losses! Just like on Friday, the Bloodline wants to put Kevin away for good! They RAM Kevin into steel steps, then Solo clears the announce desk! Jimmy drags Kevin over, SMACKS him off the desk, then pushes him onto it. The Bloodline mugs Kevin, and Solo sets up on the barriers. But SAMI ZAYN flies in! He CLOBBERS Jimmy, then fires off hands on Solo! Sami POSTS Solo! And CLOBBERS Jimmy! Sami fires off on Jimmy, SMACKS him off the desk, then gets a chair! Fans are thunderous as Sami swings at Solo! Solo dodges and runs through the crowd!

Sami aims at Jimmy, but Jimmy also bails out! Boston is thunderous for The Great Liberator, but he locks eyes with Kevin. Sami puts the chair aside, and walks up to his best frenemy. Fans cheer as Sami offers a hand. Kevin slides out, refusing to take it. These two may have the same goal, but Kevin is not willing to forgive Sami. Will these two #JustKeepFighting the same fight until the end?

 

Bobby Lashley speaks.

“I’m tired of playing these kid games, Bray Wyatt. I came to SmackDown to confront you man to man. But you’re not a man, are you? I thought coming to your home would provoke you enough to do something and face me. But instead, you sent a guy wearing a mask to do your dirty work. Bray Wyatt, what is it going to take to face me like a man?” The screens glitch, that might be a sign… But will the All Mighty get his meeting with the Eater of Worlds?

 

Backstage interview with Carmella.

Byron Saxton is with The Princess of Staten Island, and tonight, she faces the Raw Women’s Champion, Bianca Belair,. what would a win mean to her? To be real, the only reason Mella got this match was to get her out of Adam Pearce’s non-existent hair. But what he’s done is set up his precious little champion to be humiliated before WrestleMania. If Pearce was any good at his job, he’d make this match a #1 Contender’s Match, and a win would give Mella a part in the Raw Women’s Championship match. But again, Pearce ruins everything. Chelsea Green walks in and says amen! Someone else finally sees Pearce is a Grade A Dumpster Fire.

Pearce can be seen walking up, and when he spots these two, he turns the other direction! Chelsea says that tonight, after Mella wipes the floor with Bianca, they go above Pearce’s shiny head and talk to his manager to get that Mania moment. Mella loves that! Where has Chelsea been all Mella’s life? In fact, Chelsea should be out there in Mella’s corner! That’d be great! Oh, sorry, Byron is still here? Is he really listening to this private conversation? Where is his journalistic integrity? Get outta here, you mouth breather! Go! Byron leaves, but Chelsea and Mella are excited. Will this be the most FABULOUS Raw?

Bianca Belair VS Carmella w/ Chelsea Green!

Raw returns and Mella makes her entrance, the Hot Mess with her after all. The bell rings and Bianca eggs Mella on. They circle, tie up, and Bianca headlocks for a takeover. Mella fights up, but Bianca throws her for another takeover. Mella headscissors but Bianca kips free. Chelsea says Mella’s still got this, and the two tie up. Mella headlocks, Bianca wrenches out and headlocks back. Mella powers out but Bianca runs her over! Bianca dusts herself off, runs, then handsprings over Mella’s dropdown. Bianca eggs Mella on., things speed up, Bianca hurdles but Mella stops herslf. Bianca runs in but Mella dumps her out!

Bianca grabs Mella’s legs but Mella boots her into the desk! Bianca comes back, chases Mella into the ring, but Mella goes back to the apron. Mella HOTSHOTS Bianca, hurries in and throws her down by her hair! Chelsea applauds but fans boo. Mella soaks it all up, brings Bianca up but Bianca blocks the whip! Bianca whips, Mella reverses but Bianca goes up and over and handsprings, then says kiss hits! Mella runs in, Bianca goes up and over and dropkicks Mella down! Bianca kips up, fans fire up, and Bianca runs at Mella in the corner. Mella gets around, Bianca switches, O’Conner Roll, TWO! Bianca goes up again, but Mella BOOTS her!

Mella YANKS Bianca off the ropes! Mella says SHE is the EST, and Raw goes picture in picture.

Mella soaks up the heat while Bianca checks her face. Mella bows and Chelsea cheers, but Bianca goes to a corner. Mella says for Bianca to kiss this and runs in, but Bianca slips out to the apron. Bianca bumps Mella off buckles, and again and again and again! Bianca slingshots, but Mella moves and Bianca only gets buckles! Mella throws back elbows over and over, then lets off to taunt the fans. Mella drags Bianca up, bumps her off her boot, and then moonwalks away. “Mella! Is! Money!” Mella runs in, FABULOUS BRONCO BUSTER! Cover, TWO! Chelsea complains on Mella’s behalf but Mella wraps on a chinlock.

Bianca endures as Mella leans on the hold. Bianca fights up, has Mella as a backpack, and she RAMS Mella into buckles! And again! And then she throws Mella away! Bianca runs in, Mella tilt-o-whirls, but Bianca swings Mella to whip her to the corner. Mella BOOTS back! Mella pushes Bianca to a cover, TWO! Chelsea says Mella still has this, she’s smarter. Mella hip drops Bianca and mocks her braid! Mella pushes Bianca but Bianca rolls Mella up! TWO, and Mella CLOBBERS Bianca! Chelsea applauds while Mella stalks Bianca. Mella mocks the fans but Bianca throws body shots. Mella CLUBS Bianca down!

Mella snapmares Bianca back into the chinlock as Raw returns to single picture. Bianca endures, Mella mocks the “E S T!” chants, then says SHE is the best. Fans rally, Bianca fights up, and Bianca scoops Mella! Mella slips free and throws Bianca down by her hair! Mella goes to the apron, climbs up the corner, and leaps! CROSSBODY, but Bianca rolls through! Fans fire up as Bianca scoops Mella but Mella pulls the braid! They tug-o-war, Bianca whips Mella, Mella ducks ‘n’ dodges. Mella tilt-o-whirls, but Bianca blocks again! Bianca has Mella for a BACKBREAKER! Mella writhes, Bianca handsprings, to MOONSAULT! Chelsea distracts! Bianca would’ve won by now!

Bianca grabs at Chelsea, but Mella FABULOUS KICKS!! Cover, TWO!! Chelsea and the ref argue, but Mella talks more trash. Bianca RAMS Mella into the corner! The ref counts, Bianca lets off to SLAP Mella! Bianca climbs up, and she rains down fists! Fans count along, and Bianca goes all the way to TEN! Bianca then backflips, but Chelsea runs in! Bianca TOSSES Chelsea, then goes out after her! Bianca TOSSES Mella up and out! Fans cheer, Bianca tells her to mind her business, but Mella rolls Bianca up! FEET ON ROPES! TWO!! Bianca torture racks, to KISS OF DEATH!! Cover, Bianca wins!

Winner: Bianca Belair, by pinfall

But Chelsea CLOBBERS Bianca! Fans boo as she and Mella mug Bianca! They sit Bianca up, but HERE COMES ASUKA!! The Empress of Tomorrow scares Mella and Chelsea, and she BLUE MISTS Chelsea!! Talk about a hot mess! Mella freaks out and gets Chelsea outta there! Asuka’s wild eyes then lock onto Bianca. Bianca smiles back, and she stands up with the title. The fans fire up seeing these two, will these two soon have the wildEST match for the title at WrestleMania?

 

Sami finds Kevin backstage.

Sami says he isn’t sure what to say. He isn’t sure what else to do. But can Kevin see what Sami’s been trying to tell him? Does Kevin see what he is trying to say? The Bloodline is too much for him, Sami or any one person. This isn’t a ploy to make everything okay again. Sami knows it’s complicated. They don’t need to be best friends again. They don’t need to ride together, or even team together. But they have the same objective, and neither can do it alone. They need to do this together. For once, just listen to Sami on this. When it comes to The Bloodline, Sami knows, because he was in it.

Yeah, Kevin knows that part. He remembers Sami staking his claim in this very city right here. At Kevin’s expense, too. Kevin remembers it all. But yeah, Sami is right, it is too much for one man, and Kevin knows because he’s been doing it alone for eight months! EIGHT. MONTHS. But yeah, maybe together, they could take the Bloodline down. But Kevin doesn’t want to do this with Sami. Maybe Kevin was wrong, that maybe Sami can go back, apologize, stroke the ego, and Roman will probably embrace Sami the way he’s always wanted. Kevin is done with Sami. Just leave him out of this. Does Sami understand that?

Sami walks away, but surely this isn’t over between them. What will it take for them to return to the way things were?

 

Rhea Ripley speaks.

“It’s time for complete and utter eradication. I’ve been in the ring with every single woman who thought they could take me out, and I have brutalized every single one of them. At WrestleMania, Rhea Ripley is walking out the new SmackDown Women’s Champion.” Will the Judgment Day’s Eradicator dethrone the Queen, Charlotte Flair?

 

The Miz is in the ring.

The Hollywood A-Lister and the host of WrestleMania 39 is here, and he says he knows what we’re thinking. Why would he ever set foot int he same right with Seth Rollins after what he did to Miz last week? Because Miz is going to moderate the face-to-face as preparations for his WrestleMania hosting duties. And as the host, Miz knows that he can’t have any biased towards any superstar. He will set that aside and let the show go on, moderating with the utmost professionalism. If anyone has an issue with that, then that someone shouldn’t have used Miz’s phone to set this up!

“So without any further ado, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome social media sensation, Logan Paul!” Fans boo as the ImPAULsive Influencer walks out to the ring. But he leaves Miz hanging on the handshake. And then without introductions, here comes Seth Rollins! Fans sing “OH~ OHH~ OHHH~!” as Rollins enters the ring and gets himself a mic. Miz raises his hand. Do you know what this means? “OH~ OHH~ OHHH~!” “When my hand goes up, your mouths go shut!” “OH~ OHH~ OHHH~!” Miz is the moderator, and he will keep things moving on! Miz says Boston is living up to its stereotypes!

But Rollins has Miz be quiet so we can hear the singing echo out. Logan says this segment has a time limit so shut up. Fans boo but Miz thanks Logan for saying it. The fans still sing anyway. Rollins says, “BOSTOOON~! Well, well, well, would ya look what the cat dragged in? Live in the flesh! He is gracing us with his presence! Social media superstar, Logan Paul…!” Boston chants “LOGAN SUCKS!” but Logan soaks it all up. Rollins says it sounds like Boston knows about Logan Paul. And even though they’ve had their run-ins, Rollins and Logan haven’t been formally introduced. So if you don’t know, he is a Visionary, he is a revolutionary, he is… SETH! FREAKIN! ROLLINS!

Logan says he knows who Rollins is. And fans sing again. Logan says Rollins is the clown he dumped at Royal Rumble, and the guy who’s head he stomped at Elimination Chamber. But Logan doesn’t know Rollins’ problem with him, other than that he’s embarrassed Rollins twice. And that Logan accomplished in one year what Rollins did in twenty. And that Logan is better at Rollins’ job than Rollins is. Logan is coming in, Rollins is on his way out. Logan works smarter, not harder, and he’s just naturally good at this. In fact, if Logan were Rollins, he wouldn’t like him either. Miz says not to take a side, but Logan made some good points.

Fans chant, “F YOU, LOGAN!” Logan revels in that, but Rollins says, “Here’s the thing. He does make some good points. But what you’re missing is none of that is the reason we don’t like you. So let me put this to you as simply as I can. We don’t like you because you are the SCUM OF THE EARTH! You’re a coward! You’re a troll! You’re a fraud! You’re, what do they call it? A human dumpster fire! And we don’t want you in our house!!” Fans fire up for that! Rollins knows Boston isn’t here to see them mince words. They are here to see Rollins get his pound of flesh! “So the time for talk is over! It’s time to FIGHT!”

Rollins throws off his jacket, Logan sets his feet, but Miz has them both stand down! It is his job to make sure that these two do NOT fight! Logan says Miz doesn’t speak for him. If Logan wants to fight Rollins in Boston, he’s gonna do that! Because if Logan wants something, he’s gonna do it! That’s just how he do. But guess what? He won’t. Fans boo but Logan says one thing he doesn’t do is fight for free. He is a premium act, and he isn’t fighting for free… in Boston. Get real! However, if the stage was bigger, the money was better, and they were somewhere with more star power, Logan would consider it.

Miz says he is the host of WrestleMania, and he could make Rollins VS Logan for Mania happen! He just- Wait, he can make that happen? All he has to do is go to the back and pull some strings? Yeah, absolutely! Right here and now? Yes! Then what’re we waiting for! Rollins throws Miz out of the ring! Logan kicks low! But Rollins avoids the stomp! Rollins goes after Logan, Miz pulls Rollins off him, but Rollins SUPERKICKS Miz down! ONE LUCKY PUNCH!! Logan takes Rollins out!! Logan tells Rollins, “When you wake up, let me know about WrestleMania. Oh, oh, and one more thing. Buy-bye, b*tch.”

Logan drops the mic and heads out, but will he regret sucker punching the Visionary?

 

Omos w/ MVP VS Dolph Ziggler!

The Nigerian Giant will get his battle with The Beast, Brock Lesnar, but that means he’ll need to be in the best shape possible. Will he get more than a tune-up with the Show-Off? Or will Omos stand tall on the Road to WrestleMania?

Raw returns and Ziggler makes his entrance. Wait, is that Mustafa Ali in the front row being a Ziggler fan? The bell rings, Ziggler tells Ali to shut up and go away. Ziggler and Omos circle, but Omos corners Ziggler. Ziggler slips away, jumps on for a SLEEPER, but Omos stays standing. Omos throws Ziggler off, runs in, but into an ELBOW! Ziggler BOOTS Omos, then runs, but into a BOOT from Omos! Ali says it’s okay, Ziggler can shake that off. But then Omos hits the MOUNTAINTOP SLAM!! Cover, Omos wins!!

Winner: Omos, by pinfall

Ali is surprised, though he did have a hand in making this match happen… Is Ali genuine in his support? Or is this his way of trolling Ziggler and getting even for before?

As for Omos and MVP, MVP gets the mic. “Brock Lesnar! You wanted me to hype up a match? This is all the hype I need right here! You should’ve NEVER put your hands on me, Brock! Because I give you my word, the 7’3″, 416 pound Nigerian Giant, Omos, tames the Beast at WrestleMania!” Omos is all fired up and could probably fight again. Will he get far more than a fight against Lesnar?

 

Maximum Male Models talks backstage.

That physique is so rotund. He does have that je ne sais quoi. It’s French. But Maxxine Dupri knows, he has “IT!” Really? Baron Corbin walks over and says all that means so much to him. All those compliments, it really helps. Things haven’t been going Corbin’s way. He lost money in poker, he has been losing matches, and he lost his mentor, JBL. EW! EW EW EW! NO! Corbin, they were NOT talking about you! They were talking about him. Otis! The width! The girth! Okay, what? What does Otis have that Corbin doesn’t? Charisma, uniqueness, and the “it factor.” HAIR! Hey, Bruce Willis is bald.

But you are NOT Bruce Willis, Corbin! You are a troglodyte! Maxxine calms Mansoor down, and says she sees some potential in Corbin. That is, if he can solve a problem for them. See over there, next to the “stunningly attractive beefcake,” the short ugly one. Gable? Yes. Handle him, and Maxxine will consider adding Corbin as a client. Then consider it done. Maxxine is plotting, but is she taking out two birds with one stone?

 

The Bloodline talks backstage.

Jimmy is preparing for his match with Sami, and Paul Heyman says that Jimmy is the man. Jimmy is the one who will take out Sami Zayn, the one who will solve the problem, and the one who will make sure that The Tribal Chief never has to hear the name “Sami” again. And to do that, with all the pressure that Jimmy must be feeling, and not be distracted by the fact that the Tribal Chief has given Jimmy until this Friday to bring Jey back into the fold… Wow. Because if that doesn’t happen, The Tribal Chief won’t blame Solo, nor will he blame Heyman. If Jimmy doesn’t get Jey back in the Bloodline by Friday, Roman Reigns will blame Jimmy.

Heyman leaves and Jimmy is surely feeling the weight now. Will he crumble under that pressure? Or will Jey return to spare Jimmy from Roman’s wrath?

 

Johnny Gargano w/ Dexter Lumis VS Finn Balor w/ The Judgment Day!

Speaking of Otis, Johnny Wrestling survived fighting the human tree trunk, but the Prince promised to finish things himself. Will this be Gargano’s Judgment Day? Or will Gargano be a speedbump on Finn’s Road to WrestleMania?

Raw returns and Gargano makes his entrance, accompanied by the Tortured Artist. The bell rings and the two circle. Finn and Gargano tie up, Finn knees low then CLUBS Gargano down. Lumis stares at the rest of Judgment Day while Finn headlocks. Gargano powers out, but Finn runs him over! Finn flexes, then he snapmares Gargano to elbow him in the shoulder. Finn chinlocks but Gargano slips out to hammerlock. Finn gets the ropebreak, Judgment Day protests, but Finn elbows Gargano away. Finn grabs Gargano’s arm and grinds it with an armlock. Gargano endures and Boston rallies up.

Gargano fights up, arm-drags free, then arm-drags to an armlock! Finn tries to headscissor but Gargano digs a knee into Finn’s face. Finn fights up, Gargano wrenches, but Finn fishhooks Gargano! Finn CLUBS Gargano and has the armlock again. Gargano endures and fights his way up. Finn wrenches the arm again but Gargano flips, kips up and ENZIGURIS! Finn rebounds to CLOBBER Gargano! Gargano goes to ropes but Finn is after him. Finn bumps Gargano off buckles, RAMS into him, then whips him corner to corner. Finn runs in but into BOOTS! Gargano runs to RANA! And then he DROPKICKS Finn out!

Fans fire up, Lumis is there! Finn doesn’t want any trouble, but Gargano DIVES! Direct hit and Raw goes to picture in picture.

Judgment Day is upset but Lumis is stone faced as always. Gargano brings Finn up and over, CHOPS him against barriers, then headlocks him. Gargano storms up to Judgment Day, and CHOPS Finn right in front of them! Fans rally for Gargano while Finn goes to the ring. Gargano hurries after, rolls Finn to SCHOOLBOY KICK! Cover, TWO! Rhea taunts Lumis but Gargano focuses on Finn. Finn wants timeout, and offers a handshake. Gargano considers it, and he shakes Finn’s hand. To kick him low! Gargano CHOPS Finn, whips him to ropes, but Finn reverses. Gargano sunset flips but Finn rolls through to basement dropkick! Cover, TWO!

Judgment Day cheers while Gargano goes to ropes. Finn stalks Gargano, chinbars and puts him in a corner, then CHOPS! Gargano staggers away but Finn is on him again. Finn CHOKES Gargano on the ropes! He lets off at 4, the ref argues with him, and Rhea sucker punches Gargano! Finn covers, TWO! Rhea and Priest still high five while Finn grinds Gargano down with a headlock. Gargano endures, fights his way up, and Judgment Day freaks out. But Finn hits a BIG back suplex! Cover, TWO! Finn is frustrated but he kicks Gargano down at the ropes. Finn taunts the fans, kicks Gargano more, and Raw returns to single picture.

Finn stomps Gargano at the ropes, stomps him again, then springboard- BOOTS from Gargano! Finn staggers, swings but into counter punches! Gargano whips, Finn reverses, but Gargano ducks ‘n’ dodges to LEAPING LARIAT! Gargano rallies, Finn dodges and CHOPS! Gargano rebounds to DISCUS LARIAT! Fans fire up but Lumis is still stoic. Gargano ENZIGURIS Finn out of the ring. Finn avoids the plancha, but he sees Gargano on the apron, SLINGSHOT SPEAR! Cover, TWO!! Finn is still in this and Judgment Day calms down. Gargano runs corner to corner to DOUBLE KNEE, then he snapmares Finn.

Fans fire up as Gargano aims, but Finn SLINGBLADES first! Finn aims now, runs in, but into a SUPERKICK! Gargano resets, to SUPERKICK again! Cover, TWO!! Finn survives but Gargano runs to tilt-o-whirl, but Finn blocks! ELBOW DROP DDT! Cover, TWO! Finn snarls but Gargano is still down. Finn rains down fists, but Gargano turns that to a sunset! TWO!! Finn staggers up, into a GAMANGIRI! Gargano aims but Rhea distracts! Gargano jumps Priest’s swipe, and then CANNONBALLS onto Dom! Fans fire up but Gargano has to hurry away from Priest. Gargano gets in the ring, Finn trips and DOUBLE STOMPS him!

Finn aims from the corner, runs in, SHOTGUN! Gargano hits buckles and he ends up in the drop zone! Finn goes up, but EDGE IS HERE! The Judgment Day go tot he ramp, but the Rated R Superstar sneaks in from the crowd! He SHOVES Finn down! Finn hotshots off ropes! Gargano goes to the apron, for ONE FINAL BEAT!! Cover, Gargano wins!

Winner: Johnny Gargano, by pinfall

And then Lumis CLOBBERS Priest! Edge has Finn all alone now, and Boston is thunderous! Finn staggers up, into a SPEAR!! Edge says this isn’t over! Finn wanted a final fight with Edge, and he’s getting it! Will Judgment Day regret ever turning on their founder?

 

Backstage interview with Edge.

Byron catches up with the Rated R Superstar and wants to know, what does he have to say about costing Finn his match against Gargano tonight? Edge says that Finn cost Edge a match he never should’ve lost, so with no disrespect to Gargano, Edge just returned the favor and cost Finn a match he never should’ve lost. They’re affecting each other’s careers and neither man has time for that. They both wanna settle this, so Edge tells Finn that next week, Edge will be in the ring by himself to settle this. Let’s see if Finn has the same stones. Will the Prince do things 1v1 with Edge to finally end this?

 

Nikki Cross VS Piper Niven!

Anarchy incarnate is ready to take on a former teammate in the defense of Candice LeRae, her “new friend.” One way or another, we’re gonna see some serious lass kicking, but who comes out on top?

Raw returns and Piper makes her entrance. While Piper stands on the apron, Nikki JUMPS on her! Nikki thrashes Piper around with fingers in her face! The ref reprimands but this isn’t a match yet. Nikki drags Piper in, HAMMERS away, then jumps on for more thrashing! Piper’s own hair is being used to smother her! Nikki lets Piper go, climbs up the corner, the bell rings! Piper turns around, into a CROSSBODY! Nikki chases after but Piper bails out. Nikki swings her jacket around, Piper fumes and storms up to the apron. Nikki rushes in, but Piper HEADBUTTS her down! Piper gets in but Nikki DRPOPKICKS back!

Nikki throat chops, RAMS into Piper, then reels her in. But Piper wrenches out to whip and SCRAPBUSTER! Cover, Piper wins!

Winner: Piper Niven, by pinfall

Nikki came out of the gate fast, but she ran right into a wall named Piper! Will no one stop Piper from pulverizing everyone on her path towards the title?

 

Rick Boogs tries to deadlift a truck.

But he just can’t! He swears he can but Elias walks over. Boogs says what’s up, but Elias asks about his notes. Boogs realizes he doesn’t have them! Elias says it isn’t about the notes, though. What does Boogs remember? Uh, Bobby Lashley putting Elias in the Hurt Lock, and… Those massive pecs. Boogs, you’re missing the point of everything! Elias took the fight to Lashley! Everyone wants to Walk With Elias! Elias’ star power has raised. But the only way Boogs can learn is if he gets out there and does it himself. Look, there’s Bronson Reed. Boogs, go over there and challenge him. Is Elias sure? Elias tells Boogs to tell Bronson, “I want to fight you.”

Boogs goes over to Bronson, talks to him, and then Bronson walks up to Elias. Elias wants to fight Bronson, huh? Then it’s your funeral. See you next week. Wait, what? Boogs is proud he did it, but what did he say? That Elias wanted to fight him. That’s what Elias said, right? NO! He meant… Well, Boogs has a lot to learn. But, lips! Will the Drifter survive running into the Colossal Aussie?

 

John Cena heads to the ring!

The SIXTEEN TIME world champion and Boston’s own is back on Raw, and clearly the reaction he just heard got him a bit. Cena slides into the ring and fans fire up even more! Cena gets the mic, but then Austin Theory makes his way out. Theory goes to the ring, gets himself a mic, but the fans chant for Cena. Theory encourages them to keep going, so they do. “And just like them, John, I’ve got all the respect in the world for you. Hey, hey, all of you might not know this, but I only became a WWE superstar because of you. I remember watching you on TV with my mom, you inspired me, John. You did! The hustle, the loyalty, the respect, I thank you for that.

“Hey, no need to disrespect me, because I came out here with a gift for you, John. Yeah, a gift. A gift that is from the bottom of my heart. A gift that is bigger than any movie role that you’re gonna do. It’s a gift! Of me and you, one-on-one…” Fans chant for Cena even harder, and Theory likes it! “Cena it up,” because that gift is them on the Grandest Stage of Them All for the United States Championship! Theory VS Cena! Fans like the sound of that! Cena says, “No.” The fans and Theory are surprised. Cena says he thought about it, and the answer is no. He is not interested in Theory’s “gift,” because he hasn’t earned the right to give it.

Cena says he has been watching, and listening, and he doesn’t care. Just like every single person in here, they don’t care about Theory! Why? We don’t care about Theory because we don’t believe Theory. We don’t believe because Theory doesn’t believe. Theory is a generic kid in fancy sneakers and sunglasses indoors, but there’s nothing inside. And Cena isn’t talking from a high place. Cena’s walked in Theory’s shoes. There’s a sign right out in the crowd that says “Theory is a John Cena wannabe.” Fans cheer that they’re getting the shoutout.

Cena says he’s Theory’s Ghost of Christmas Future! And right now, Theory is in that phase of “Ruthless Aggression.” That phase almost got Cena fired! What a great opportunity it was, but we all saw Cena didn’t believe in himself, and the opportunity just wasn’t enough. Theory has been given opportunity after opportunity and he doesn’t believe in himself and the fans know it. Theory has no heart or soul. The fans are here out of respect because for 20 years, we’ve been yelling back and forth at each other, but they BELIEVE in Cena. They don’t believe in Theory. Theory is a pair of trunks away from being a jabroni.

Wait, wait, wait. No. Here’s a feedback sandwich, here’s something good. Theory has the best name in WWE history. Think about it! Stone Cold Steve Austin! The Rock! The Undertaker! There is no name better than Austin Theory. Fans boo but Theory likes where Cena is going. But Cena says that is exactly what Austin is: A Theory. In theory, Theory should be great! In theory, Theory is what every WWE executive looks for. He looks great, moves great, runs fast, etc. In theory, everyone should be here to see Theory. “But no one cares. And you’re wasting our time. So on behalf of Boston, we would like to give you a gift!”

Cena tells Theory to shut up, turn around, get out of this ring, and “we” will let him walk out of here in one piece. Fans fire up for Cena while Theory considers his options. Theory turns around, but then says he’s not going anywhere! Just like that bald spot on Cena’s head! Cena takes off his hat to show the combover. He’s proud of the senior circuit! Oh, he is? Cena’s got a comeback for everything, huh? But what’s funny is, Theory looks around at all the shirts. The same one Cena has right here: Never Give Up. But, wait. Is John Cena saying no? Is he saying that he’s giving up?

And the hat! The hat says “respect” but where’s the respect for all the fans? Cena has a golden ticket against the greatest US Champion at WrestleMania, and he’s gonna give it up? Where’s the hustle? The loyalty? The respect?! Doesn’t everyone wanna see Cena at Mania? Then shut up because Cena said no! Theory says what he’s realized, Cena being Theory’s childhood hero and all that. Boston, pay close attention. Because the saying may be said a lot but it’s right. NEVER meet your heroes. Because when you do, you just get disappointed. Fans boo, and some chant, “BEAT HIS ASS!”

Cena would rather be bald then have the company pipe in fake crowd noise because nobody cares. Theory can change the subject, he still sucks. Theory really is a dumb SOB. Cena didn’t say “no” because he was giving up. He said “no” to save Theory’s ass. Theory is not ready. Theory’s putting Cena against the wall but he doesn’t understand. If Cena and Theory have a match at Mania, and Cena wins, then Theory loses everything. He’s done! And if they have a match and Theory somehow wins, he still loses everything! Sure, sure, you win the day, but then you gotta go out the Monday after, all by yourself, and explain.

Theory won’t have Cena to lean on, it’ll be all on him against “the most harsh, vocal, ruthless, critical audience in the WWE, and they will eat you alive!!” They will see what Cena sees, and that is that Theory is full of crap! But Theory has left Cena no choice since he brought the fans into it. So Cena will ask Boston what they think. “Boston… Before we get all WrestleMania rowdy, I wanna thank my family for being here because it really means a lot to me. And I’m asking for help. I need your help way up there, I need your help right here, I need your help. We’re going to make a decision right here and now. Do you Wanna see Austin Theory VS John Cena at WrestleMania?”

“YES!!!” Fans continue to chant “YES! YES! YES!” Cena says to pardon the senioritis. It isn’t just his hair, it’s his hearing. Do they wanna see Theory VS Cena at Mania? “YES!!!” Cena may not care about Theory, but he’ll never give up on the fans. Theory will remember this moment as the biggest mistake of his life. At Mania, for the US Championship, it’ll be THEORY VS CENA!! Cena wishes Theory luck. “We all know you don’t have it here,” Cena says as he points to Theory’s head. “We all know you don’t have it here,” he says as he points to Theory’s heart. “And we all know you don’t have it here.” CUP CHECK! Work on that last one.

Cena leaves and Theory is furious, but Theory literally asked for this. And Cena stops at the stage. “in no way, shape or form are you ready for the WrestleMania stage. But Boston deserves to see somebody that is. Boston, Massachusetts, I introduce to you the American Nightmare, Cody Rhodes!” Cody walks out on stage and fans cheer as he shakes hands with Cena and hugs it out. Will Theory regret asking for the legend?

 

Backstage interview with Sami Zayn.

Cathy Kelley tentatively walks up to Sami and says that so far, his attempts to reconcile with Kevin Owens have failed. How is he feeling going into tonight’s main event against Jimmy Uso? Sami wishes he could say Kevin is just being stubborn and angry and doesn’t know what he’s talking about, but Kevin’s right about what happened here just last November at WarGames. But everything has changed now! Everything’s different! The one guy who had Sami’s back through thick and thin in Jimmy Uso now has the responsibility of putting an end to Sami. This match is about survival, you understand?

Jimmy wants to end the Sami Zayn problem, but if he fails, it is the end of Jimmy! And Sami is not going anywhere until he sees the end of Roman Reigns and The Bloodline. So sorry, Jimmy, “my dawg,” but tonight is NOT gonna be your night. Sami heads out, but will he be able to survive a desperate and angry Jimmy Uso?

 

Baron Corbin VS Chad Gable w/ Otis!

The Lone Wolf is feeling down, but things could be looking up. Will he be able to clear “Master Gable” out of the way so MMM can make Otis into “Otīs? Or will this be another failing in Corbin’s career?

Raw returns as Corbin makes his entrance. The bell rings and Corbin ties up with Gable. Corbin throws Gable to a corner, SPLASHES him, then whips him corner to corner hard! Gable bounces off buckles and falls to the mat. Corbin stomps away as MMM watches backstage. Maxxine likes what she sees as Corbin drops an elbow on Gable’s back. Corbin drives elbows into Gable’s shoulders, but fans chant, “WE WANT OTIS!” Corbin Canadian Racks Gable, thrashes him around with the Canadian Backbreaker, but fans rally up. Gable fights free, and he back drops Corbin away! Fans rally as Gable goes to a corner.

Corbin runs in, misses, and Gable fires off forearms and uppercuts! Gable knees, UPPERCUTS, runs, dodges and tilt-o-whirls to waistlock. O’Conner, CHAOS THEORY! Fans fire up while Corbin writhes. Gable goes up the corner and Otis cheers him on. MOONSAULT, but Corbin dodges! CHOKE SLAM BACKBREAKER! Corbin roars, says Gable is nothing, but Gable picks an ankle! ANKLE LOCK!! Corbin flails, reaches out, but Gable GRAPEVINES! Corbin TAPS, Gable wins!

Winner: Chad Gable, by submission

Otis celebrates with Gable, “A THANK YEW~!” Corbin fails, will MMM never be able to add the round mound of manliness to their stable?

 

Becky Lynch is here!

The Man is in Boston, but she also has the legend, Lita! They’re the NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions after defeating Damage CTRL just last week, so they’re here to celebrate! Becky has a mic to say The Man and Lita have come around to Boston, here as the new tag team champions of the world~! “Because when a couple of legends like us step in the ring side by side, you better believe we’re not gonna miss.” Lita says when Becky gave her the opportunity to become a tag team champion, you either let that opportunity pass you by, or you make history like they did. Fans cheer that.

Lita knows Kai & Sky didn’t make it easy on them, but they made it worth it. Fans chant, “You Deserve It!” and Lita gives the belt a little kiss. Lita says that as Becky’s friend and tag partner, she sincerely wants to thank her. But there is a very, very special equalizer they have yet to thank tonight. Here she come! It’s TRISH STRATUS! Trish joins Lita and Becky in the ring, and Trish gets a mic to say, “First of all, Lita. You know I’ll always have your back. And to see you team up with The Man and capture gold, I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. And to be fair, a couple months back in Toronto, I did tell Bayley that if she didn’t shut her mouth-”

Wait, here comes Bayley! The Role Model leads DMG CTRL out and says, “Um, a ding dong! You idiots love to show up when it’s convenient for you, doncha? You love to steal someone else’s spotlight if it means you can add something else to your damn trophy case.” DMG CTRL steps right in the ring and Bayley says that while the dumdums cheer them on, Bayley sees right through them! They’re selfish. Trish, Lita, you two are legitimately the reasons why they’re in this ring now. But DMG CTRL will be the reason they never come back! Trish tells Bayley she is good at interrupting, but not at listening.

Trish warned her that she could go from “I am to retired,” to “I was retired.” And y’know what? What better place to do it and shut Bayley up than on the Grandest Stage of Them All? So how about a Six Woman Tag at Mania? Bayley asks if that’s what they want, then they accept! Kai & Sky look at Bayley with confusion, a bit like when she accepted the title match for them. Kai & Sky then swing on the legends, but Trish & Lita both dodge! And they fire off forearms! They throw Kai & Sky out, and Becky gets in Bayley’s face. Fans fire up and Bayley dares Becky to do something. Bayley smirks, but then realizes she’s surrounded.

Fans fire up as Trish and Bayley talk some trash. Bayley swings on Becky! But Becky counter punches! Lita ROCKS Bayley, Trish DECKS Bayley! And then CHICK- NO, DMG CTRL gets Bayley outta there! Fans are ready for this star-studded Six Woman Tag, will Hollywood be the perfect place for this generational showdown?

 

Sami Zayn VS Jimmy Uso w/ Solo Sikoa!

Just like when Kevin fought Solo, we all know that The Bloodline always has back-up. Sami is walking into what is less a match and more a trap, just like it was on Friday. But even so, will Sami survive to see the mission through? Or is this the night the Bloodline solves its Sami Zayn problem?

The bell rings, and Sami hits a THESZ PRESS! Sami rains down fast hands, but lets off to clothesline Jimmy up and out! Fans fire up, Sami goes out after Jimmy, but Jimmy UPPERCUTS! Jimmy whips Sami into barriers while fans sing “OLE~! OLE OLE OLE~!” Jimmy runs in, but Sami tosses him into the timekeeper’s area! Sami watches Solo while Raw goes picture in picture.

Sami fetches Jimmy and throws haymakers. Sami brings Jimmy around, bumps him off the desk, then climbs up onto the desk! Sami leaps to AX HANDLE Jimmy down! Solo stays back but he watches Sami. Sami puts Jimmy in the ring, goes to the corner and hops up, to leap, into an UPPERCUT! Jimmy snarls while Sami writhes, and Jimmy stomps away on Sami at the ropes. They go to the apron, Jimmy brings Sami up, to APRON SNAP SUPLEX! Sami writhes even more but Jimmy seethes. Jimmy drags Sami up, brings him around, and POSTS him! Jimmy slides in the ring and lets the ring count handle this.

Fans rally for Sami while Solo stares at Sami. The count is 5 of 10, Sami staggers up at 7 and slides in at 8! Jimmy rains down fists right away! Jimmy lets off to throw up the finger, #WeTheOnes. Sami crawls to a corner, Jimmy says, “UCE! SO! UCE! SO!” Jimmy runs in to HIP ATTACK! Jimmy makes everyone ready the shirt, #WeTheOnes. Sami crawls to another corner, Jimmy rains down fists. The ref counts, Jimmy lets off, and he watches Sami sit up. “UCE! OH! UCE! OH!” Jimmy runs to HIP ATTACK again! Sami flounders, Jimmy taunts him, and Raw returns to single picture. “I’m supposed to take you out!”

Jimmy swings, but Sami counter punches! And again! And again! And again! Sami whips, Jimmy reverses but Sami BOOTS back! Sami hops up, kicks away on Jimmy’s face, then reels him in, TORNADO DDT! Cover, TWO! Jimmy is still in this but fans fire up for Sami as he goes to the apron. Sami goes up a corner, leaps, and CROSSBODIES! Cover, TWO! Jimmy escapes but clutches a shoulder as he sits up. Sami brings Jimmy up and reels him in, but Jimmy throws elbows to fight he lift. Jimmy whips and UPPERCUTS Sami! Sami stays up against ropes, runs back in, but Jimmy throws him out!

Jimmy distracts the ref and Solo creeps up. But the ref sees Solo! The ref EJECTS Solo! Fans fire up and Jimmy is furious! Jimmy’s back-up is gone, and Sami reels him in! BLUE THUNDER BOMB!! Cover, TWO!!! Jimmy survives and Sami is beside himself, but Raw goes back to picture in picture.

Sami thinks of what he has to do to finish this. Jimmy stirs, Sami drags him up, and suplexes. Jimmy fights it, UPPERCUTS, but Sami stays on his feet. Jimmy CHOPS! And whips, but Sami goes up and over! Jimmy dodges Sami, Sami runs, into a POP-UP SAMOAN DROP! Cover, TWO!! Sami is still in this and Jimmy is frustrated. Jimmy glares at Sami, drags him up, but again Sami throws counter punches! They go back and forth with haymakers, Sami gets the edge, but Jimmy shoves him away! Sami blocks the kick but the DRAGON WHIP connects! Jimmy is fuming but he drags Sami back up.

Jimmy brings Sami around to a corner, hoists him up top, and then GAMANGIRIS! Sami wobbles, Jimmy climbs up, but Sami blocks the superplex! Sami CLUBS away on Jimmy, hitting him again and again! Then SUNSET FLIP POWERBOMB!! Cover, TWO!!! Jimmy survives again and Sami can’t believe it! Sami drags himself up with the ropes, then goes back to the corner. Sami climbs again, Raw returns to single picture and Jimmy UPPERCUTS! And GAMANGIRIS! Jimmy goes back up after Sami, but Sami throws haymakers! Sami throws elbows, then he shoves Jimmy away. Sami leaps, into a SUPERKICK!

Both men are down and fans rally up. Wait! JEY IS HERE! Jey goes to ringside, and he gets on the desk, too! Jimmy smiles seeing his brother is back, but then he dodges Sami’s kick! Jimmy mule kicks, uppercuts and SAMOAN- NO, SUNSET FLIP! SAMI WINS!!!

Winner: Sami Zayn, by pinfall

The Sami Zayn problem is NOT solved! Jimmy is completely at a loss for words! Jey returned, but what of Roman’s ultimatum? Jey goes to the ring to join his brother, the two stare down, and fans are torn. Jey steps closer, puts his hands on Jimmy’s shoulders, and Jimmy asks where Jey stands. Jey grabs at the shirt, but he looks so conflicted. Jimmy asks him what’s wrong, and Jey walks past Jimmy. Jey looks at Sami, they both look at Jimmy, then back at each other. Sami is tentative but Jey says he trusts Sami!? Jey brings Sami in for a hug!!! Fans explode with excitement! Sami says he and Jey can take the Bloodline down now!

Jimmy looks crushed as he drops to a knee. Fans chant “UCEY! UCEY!” and Jey raises his finger. Sami raises his, too, they the ones! Sami says Jimmy can join them. It’s not too late. Fans lose their minds over this development, but then Jey SUPERKICKS SAMI!!! Jimmy grins as Jey shouts in Sami’s face! “Did you really think I would choose you?!” This is FAMILY, fool! Jey drags Sami up, throws him into the ring, and the Usos mug Sami! The cheers are now boos as Solo joins in, but here comes Cody!! The American Nightmare slides in and stands between them and Sami! Will the Bloodline only be stronger now that Jey is back?


My Thoughts:

A great Raw to mark us being just a month out from WrestleMania. The Bloodline story is again the best part of the night, and it was a great move to bookend the night with it. Jimmy giving Kevin the win with the beatdown, Sami showing up to fight the Bloodline off, and then Sami trying to get Kevin to see reason, all good stuff. And Jey showing up at the end of Sami VS Jimmy, that double swerve, that was genius. Cody making the save also works, not just because Cody’s building feud with Roman, but because it wasn’t Kevin. Kevin is understandably being stubborn about forgiving Sami, and this could drag out for a couple more weeks before the moment Kevin finally forgives Sami and is his partner against the reunited Usos.

We also got great promo segments throughout the night to set up big matches. The women’s segment comes off as the weaker one, but only because it was shorter and simpler. DMG CTRL want payback, but Bayley sticks her foot in her mouth, now she, Kai & Sky will face Becky and two legends, and there’s a very good chance Becky and the legends win, really straining DMG CTRL’s partnership. At this point, Kai & Sky can stick together but ditch Bayley, as they haven’t really benefited from being her cronies. They lost their belts, they look like they can’t do anything, they can prove they’re truly capable if they strike out on their own.

The Miz, Seth Rollins and Logan Paul had a really good promo, and of course Miz inserts himself as the moderator. It’s the only way Rollins didn’t just beat Logan up right here and now and have it be done. But Miz being the host, him making the match is a good detail, and of course Logan stands tall to put things on Rollins. And of course, promo segment of the night was Cena and Theory. Theory got a good jab about the bald spot, but Cena just tore into Theory otherwise. That line about Theory’s name being perfect for him was great, and pretty much everything Cena said was so good. Their match is going to be great stuff, too, but somehow, Theory surely wins because Cena can’t be a champion while being part-time and busy in Hollywood.

I like that Elias trying to mentor Boogs is backfiring on him, like when the two-faced cartoon character tries to get the innocent one in trouble but they end up in trouble instead. Bronson Reed is gonna squash Elias like Lashley did, and it’s odd but also clever that this is how Bronson is building his momentum. He isn’t in a story of his own, but he gets to help all these other stories move along. Lashley had a good promo, and Bray didn’t fully respond, but the White Rabbit tron hacking stuff is kinda his response. Bray heard it, that was like a twitch of his eye, and surely Bray will double down on the “games” just to get on Lashley’s nerves.

And of course the matches were all good, too. Well, Omos squashes Ziggler but that was to be expected. And though MVP had a good promo to call out Lesnar, that was really more for Ali introducing this Ziggler superfan angle that is of course all ironic and for the trolling. Ziggler will challenge Ali to a rematch, maybe Ziggler wins to get even, and we see where it goes from there. A quick match from Piper and Nikki with Candice apparently hurt by a backstage attack during Raw Talk. Piper VS Nikki should’ve been a thing when their team wasn’t working out and Nikki ditched being Almost a Super Hero. There was a point commentary used the phrase “unfamiliar foe” but they were a team, Piper would of course know Nikki. But perhaps it’s because “this” Nikki is different.

Baron Corbin getting in on the MMM and Otis story was pretty good. It adds to his own story, which is either the second coming of Bum Ass Corbin, or the rise of Bummed Out Corbin. He and Gable could’ve had a bigger match than that, as we’ve seen them feud before, but it does add to Corbin’s newest downward spiral. MMM are gonna have to wrestle Gable themselves if they wanna get “Otīs” to join them. Mella and Chelsea had a really good promo together, especially Adam Pearce’s cameo of him seeing them and running the other way. Mella VS Bianca went about as expected, in that Bianca wins. Asuka showing up to defend Bianca from Mella & Chelsea was great, too, but in those high heel boots she was wearing, Asuka was rly only gonna be able to blue mist.

And great stuff with Gargano VS Finn. Of course the Judgment Day interfere, but likewise, of course Edge shows up to turn that around. Edge doesn’t make a Mania match, but he does wanna fight Finn, maybe that brawl turns into a match for Mania. As cool as a purple paint Demon Balor could look, I feel like Finn’s moved on from that (mostly because Vince killed the Demon a couple Extreme Rules ago). But whatever they do, I feel like there needs to be a stipulation where it really is only Edge and Finn. No Judgment Day allowed ringside, no one Edge knows allowed ringside, we just get Edge VS Finn for an epic, possibly show-stealing match.

My Score: 8.9/10

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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (3/28/25)

SmackDown in the UK!

Published

on

London calling to the champion crowns!

SmackDown brings gold to London as LA Knight defends his WWE US Championship and The Street Profits defend their tag team titles! Will the landscape change this close to WrestleMania?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • WWE Tag Team Championships: The Street Profits VS Pretty Deadly; The Profits win and retain the titles.
  • Kayden Carter & Katana Chance VS The Secret Her-vice w/ Chelsea Green; The Secret Her-vice wins.
  • WWE United States Championship: LA Knight VS Braun Strowman; Braun wins, by disqualification, and Knight retains the title.
  • Charlotte Flair VS Mia Yim w/ B-Fab; Charlotte wins.
  • Randy Orton VS Drew McIntyre; McIntyre wins.
  • Jimmy Uso VS The Miz; Jimmy wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Cody Rhodes is here!

We follow The American Nightmare as walks to gorilla, then through the curtain, and London sings along with the song, “WHOA~ OH~!” Cody gets his pyro, says hello to fans along the ramp, and then we get the second “WHOA~ OH~!” and pyro. Cody goes to the ring, grabs a mic, then kneels down to kiss the WWE logo on the mat. The fans continue to sing along all the way to the end, “I AM MY KINGDOM!” The fans then cheer, and Cody holds up the belt to fire them up even more! The fans now sing for “CODY! CODY RHODES~!” and he soaks it in. The fans cheer again as Cody smiles, and he finally says, “So, London~! Whaddya wanna talk about?”

The fans chant “Let’s Go, Cena!” “CENA SUCKS!” Cody hears that dueling, and he smiles again. The song of “CODY! CODY RHODES~!” returns, then they cheer. Cody says, “At WrestleMania 41, I will be facing John Cena…” The fans boo, but Cody says, “I will be facing John Cena as he goes to break the record and win 17. But that is WrestleMania 41. In just a few nights, I will be standing face to face with John Cena in this very same city, in this very same arena.” The fans cheer that, but then here comes Randy Orton! Now the fans sing along with Voices as The Viper heads to the ring. Orton also high-fives fans before he joins Cody.

Orton grabs a mic, paces while the fans keep singing on their own, and then the fans cheer. Orton says he’s not really the sentimental type, but for Cody and for London, screw it. The fans chant “R K O! R K O!” and Orton tells Cody, “Look at you. Look at who you are now, the man you are now. Look at where he came from.” The fans cheer and sing “CODY! CODY RHODES~!” and Orton says he remembers a Cody in his early 20s, just breaking into the business. Cody was busting his ass harder than anyone else. He wasn’t exactly happy, and in fact, he was frustrated. But Cody was man enough, smart enough, to know he needed to grow, and that he couldn’t grow in the WWE.

Cody wasn’t exactly treated fairly in the WWE, so Cody left the WWE! That took some big ass balls to do what he did! Cody changed the business singlehandedly, and everyone in the back knows it. And Orton appreciates Cody for it. But then Cody came back, as they all knew one day he would. And the industry has been changed forever since the day Cody came back to the WWE. Cody is a bit teary eyed as Orton says Cody’s still the same guy, he just did what he set out to do, and he grew. Orton teases he would sing along with the fans, but the fans might leave. The fans again sing “CODY! CODY RHODES~!”

Orton asks if they remember when Cody Rhodes faced Seth Rollins in Hell in a Cell. The fans cheer because they do. Orton says that was impressive, and even impossible, as he started with a partially torn pec and then ended with a fully torn pec! His body changed all kinds of shades of purple that Orton’s never seen on a human body. The pain he must have been in. Cody persevered not just for himself. Maybe not even at all for Cody. It was not even for his family legacy; it was for each and every single fan out there! Then Cody went on to WrestleMania, beat Roman Reigns and finished the story!

But there’s always another story, isn’t there? And Cody’s right in the middle of one. Cody is in charge of his legacy, and it is a privilege for Orton to watch Cody take control of it. Ticket sales have been up, there’s more intrigue around the world, and listen to the people! It is 99.9% all because of Cody! The fans cheer that, and of course they sing. Orton says what he’s trying to say is a long-winded version of he respects Cody, loves him, and is very, very proud of him. The fans cheer that! Orton then says, “But… But now it is time for WrestleMania.” They both look to the sign, and Orton says he can guarantee Cody that Orton will kick Kevin Owens so hard in the head…!

Orton can just feel it already! He forgets how many days are left, but he can’t wait to remove Kevin’s head from his shoulders. And Orton knows Cody will enter champion, exit champion, but not before he beats the holy hell outta Cena all up and down the Vegas strip! But after all the smoke clears and the dust settles, just like Orton wants Number 17, there will come a time when Orton will want Number 15. But Orton won’t kick Cody in the balls like a coward. Orton will look Cody in the eye because he respects Cody, is proud of Cody, and sees him as an equal. Orton will look Cody in the eye and tell him that he’s coming for the title.

The fans cheer but wait! Drew McIntyre is here! The fans cheer the Scottish Terminator as he steps out on stage, mic in hand, and has a wry smile on his face as he looks at the ring. Drew waves as the fans now sing, “OH~ Drew McIntyre~!” Drew says, “Isn’t this wonderful? A couple of nepo babies having a love fest in the middle of the ring> It makes me absolutely sick. What’d you just say, Randy? if Cody gets through Cena at WrestleMania, you’re coming for that title? What exactly have you done since that big comeback to justify that title match? Aside be Randy Orton. The only big moment I can remember is you being on the shelf for months and months and months.

“People like to make jokes about it, but more people talk about my five-minute-45-second title reign than your entire comeback so far! So get to the back of the line, sunshine! As for you, Cody, you should’ve listened to me. But you shunned me. You attacked me. Everybody should’ve listened to me about John Cena, but they didn’t. And the next night, he kicked you right in the twig ‘n’ berries, proving me right as usual. And the main event of WrestleMania should be Cody Rhodes VS The UK’s only ever world champion, Drew McIntyre!” Fans do like that idea. But sadly, it’s not, because of that guyliner wearing Temu Undertaker, Damian Priest!

Drew wants to talk about what is happening. And what’s gonna happen! Drew steps up to the ring while fans sing for him again. Drew says it will not be Randy that takes the title from Cody, should he get through Cena; it’ll be McIntyre. The fans cheer, but Orton says they were trying to have a moment. Can Drew just cut the crap already? Drew says okay, sure. He’ll tell the truth, because that’s all he ever does. The truth is, Kevin might have a point! If those Voices are talking to Orton again, then they know Drew very, very well. And he’s thinking, “My God, Randy looks great! Absolutely jacked! On the outside.

On the inside, that back is hanging by a thread. And if Orton provokes McIntyre, McIntyre will break him. And as for Cody- Cody kicks Drew and UPPERCUTS him! The fans fire up, and Orton R- NO, Drew gets away! The fans boo, but the battlelines are drawn! Even if Cody makes it out of the frying pan that is Las Vegas, it’ll be into the fire that is these contenders waiting in line! Will the American Nightmare be ready for whoever comes for the crown?

 

WWE Tag Team Championships: The Street Profits VS Pretty Deadly!

Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins are finally golden again, but it’s time to put the titles on the line already! And while they’re ready for the grind, they’re up against the hometown heroes! Will the Profits still be up in the O2? Or will Kit Wilson & Elton Prince say #YESBOY to a new reign of their own?

The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see who really wants the smoke!

The teams sort out and Kit starts with Dawkins. They tie up, Dawkins headlocks, but Kit powers up and out. Dawkins runs Kit over, the fans fire up, and Dawkins fires hands on Kit in the corner! The fans rally for Pretty Deadly, Dawkins whips Kit to a corner, but Elton takes that bump! Kit CLOBBERS Dawkins, then tags Elton! Atomic drop into DROPKICK! Ford runs up, but into a DOUBLE HIP TOSS! Dawkins whips, Elton reverses, and then Elton hurdles so Kit can DDT! The fans fire up with Pretty Deadly while the Profits bail out. Pretty Deadly has control while SmackDown goes picture in picture.

Elton is right on Dawkins as he gets in, and UPPERCUTS him to the corner. Elton clinches Dawkins for another UPPERCUT! Tag to Kit, and Elton RAMS into Dawkins so Kit can UPPERCUT! Dawkins flops over, Kit drags him up to wrench the arm. Kit whips, Dawkins reverses, but Kit grabs ropes. Kit ELBOWS Dawkins, DECKS Ford, but Dawkins CLOBBERS Kit! The ref reprimands but Dawkins RAMS Kit into the corner again and again! The ref counts, Dawkins fires fast hands, then he tags in Ford. Ford says, “SUCK IT!” then he KICKS Kit! Ford scuffs Kit, then drags him to a cover, TWO!

Ford keeps Kit down with a facelock, but Kit endures the grind. Kit fights up, fires body shots, but Ford whips him away. Kit sunset flips! Ford rolls through, and PENALTY KICKS! Ford mocks Elton with the Scott Hall fingers, and the ref has to keep Elton back. Ford drags Kit up, tags Dawkins, and the Profits mug Kit. Dawkins CLUBS Kit down, then stalks him. Dawkins stays between Kit and Elton, then whips Kit into the Profits’ corner. CYCLONE- NO, Kit dodges! Ford tags in, he keeps Kit from Elton now, but Kit slips out of the suplex! Kit fakes high to go low, hot tag to Elton! Elton rallies with LARIAT after LARIAT!

Elton kicks and whips Ford to a corner, then UPPERCUTS! Elton whips the other way, UPPERCUTS again, and then does it again! Elton adds to the hattrick with a lift, Ford says a quick prayer before the SUPLEX! Ford flounders, gets to his feet, but Elton dodges to springboard and FLYING UPPERCUT! Cover, TWO! Ford stays in this, but Elton stays on him. SmackDown returns to single picture and fans rally for Pretty Deadly as Elton gives Ford a back suplex. Ford lands out, waistlocks, but Elton switches and shoves Ford. Ford CLOBBERS Elton in return! Ford is also dazed but he covers, ONE!

Kit reaches out, Elton and Ford both crawl, hot tags to Kit and Dawkins! The fans fire up as Dawkins wrenches Kit, underhooks and SILENCER! Dawkins Electric Chair Lifts Kit, Ford climbs, but Kit slips free! Kit shoves Dawkins into Ford! Ford falls to the floor, but Dawkins ENZIGIRIS Kit! Elton tags in, and Kit LARIATS Dawkins! Pretty Deadly combine for DRY MARTI-KNEES! Cover, TWO!! Dawkins survives and the Profits are a bit unsure of what to do next. Dawkins crawls to a corner, Elton runs up, but Dawkins dodges! Elton hits buckles and Dawkins TOSSES Kit, then Dawkins hits a SKY HIGH on Elton!

Dawkins hurries to tag Ford and Ford climbs up! But Kit pushes Elton out of the way! Kit takes FROM THE HEAVESN, and Elton ghost pins Ford! TWO!! Ford escapes, and he ROCKS Elton! Elton UPPERCUTS Ford! Dawkins sneaks a tag, Ford SUPERKICKS! POUNCE SAIDO COMBO!! Cover, KIT BREAKS IT! The fans fire up while all four men are down! The teams go to opposite ends, then they all stand up in the corners. They all roar, all run in, and Kit SPEARS Ford while Elton FLYING UPPERCUTS Dawkins!! London is thunderous, and Kit hurries to tag in! Pretty Deadly gets Dawkins up, for SPILT MILK!! Cover, FORD BREAKS IT!

The fans are shocked, as is Elton, but Ford saves this for his team! “This is Awesome!” as Ford runs up and Elton TOSSES him out! Now DRY MARTI- NO! Dawkins doesn’t accept the second serving, and he DUMPS Kit out! Kit skins the cat while Dawkins DECKS Elton! Dawkins catches Kit to an Electric Chair! Ford rises, DOOMSDAY BLOCKBUSTER!! Cover, Profits win!

Winners: The Street Profits, by pinfall (still WWE Tag Team Champions)

Pretty Deadly put up a heroic fight, but the hometown heroes could not capture the gold. Dawkins & Ford hold onto the gold, will this be the strongest the Profits have ever been?

 

Kayden & Katana talk with Zelina Vega.

Carter & Chance know La Muneca got screwed over by The Green Administration. Chelsea thinks she’s untouchable, but someone’s gonna stop them eventually. Well, speaking of, Alba Fyre leads the way in as she & Piper Niven “scope the perimeter.” There’s one small threat. They frisk the “miniscule” threat, but nothing they haven’t dealt with before. Chelsea struts in and says, “The Eagle has landed~!” Zelina says she is so glad the “Bootleg Men in Black” have crashed the party. Now, yeah, they all know she’s small. But clearly this small “threat” is a big threat to Chelsea’s title reign. Otherwise, it wouldn’t have taken all three of them to beat her.

KC Squared agree with that. How about tonight, we see what happens when the odds are even? Chelsea says that’s fine, because Agents P & A are ready. The Secret Her-vice has been given their next mission, but will they be able to crash the party? Or will the party crash them?

Kayden Carter & Katana Chance VS The Secret Her-vice!

SmackDown returns and The Green Administration makes their entrance. The teams sort out, Alba starts against Katana, and the two tie up. Alba KNEES low, CLUBS Katana down, then fireman’s carries. Katana fights free, tags Kayden, and they KICK, double whip, and then trip Alba up for the basement DROPKICK! Katana adds a slingshot SENTON, Kayden covers, TWO! Kayden tags Katana, they double whip Alba to a corner, then Kayden runs in. Alba DUMPS Kayden out, ROCKS Katana, and she tags Piper! Katana arm-drags Alba out, then goes out to run up. Kayden gives her a boost, Katana CROSSBODIES Alba down!

The fans fire up, but Piper goes up and out?! CANNONBALL and down goes KC Squared! Piper salutes Chelsea and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns, Kayden rallies on Alba while the fans rally up. Kayden fires up, runs in and whips, but Alba reverses. Kayden wheelbarrows, victory rolls, then SUPERKICKS! Kayden fires up again but the fans are torn. Kayden runs in at Alba to BOOT WASH her against the ropes! Chelsea protests, Kayden kicks at her, then Kayden springboards for a LEG DROP! Cover, TWO! Alba survives, Kayden whips, but Alba KICKS back! Tag to Piper, but Kayden jackknife bridges Alba! The ref explains bout the tag, Piper runs up, but Kayden moves! The SENTON hits Alba! Piper panics, Kayden tags Katana!

Katana goes up onto Kayden’s shoulders, VICTORY ROLL LAUNCHER, but Piper catches Katana! Katana fires hands, BOOTS, and then hurries to go up again. Kayden ROCKS Piper, and fireman’s carries?! SAMOAN DROP! Kayden then gives Katana the boost, for the KEG STAND SPLASH!! Cover, ALBA BREAKS IT! Kayden runs up on Alba to BOOT her out! Katana gives Kayden the boost now, SUPER CROSSBODY onto Alba! Kayden hurries to tag back in, and she brings Piper up. Piper swings, Kayden dodges and SUPERKICKS! Katana goes up, Piper staggers over that way, but Chelsea distracts the ref!

The fans are torn as Alba grabs Katana. Katana kicks Alba down, chases Chelsea off, but Piper sends Kayden into her! Piper scoops to PIPER DRIVER!! Cover, Secret Her-vice wins!

Winner: The Secret Her-vice, by pinfall

The Women’s US Champion helps her team, and now they all mug Kayden & Katana! But here comes Zelina! Vega runs down the ramp, CLOBBERS Alba, and then she gets in the ring! Zelina tilt-o-whirl DDTS Piper! And she KNEES Alba off the apron! But Chelsea CLOBBERS Zelina! Chelsea fires up, the UK is oddly with her, and she chicken wings Zeina. But Zelina fights free to fire forearms and body shots! And a BACK ELBOW! Zelina reels Chelsea in, CODE- SUPERKICK from Alba! SENTON from Piper! The Green Administration is just too much for Zelina to fight against alone! But can she, Kayden & Katana find a way to turn things around?

 

WWE United States Championship: LA Knight VS Braun Strowman!

Did the Mega Star just get this title back from Shinsuke Nakamura? YEAH! Did he help the Monster of All Monsters fight off Solo Sikoa’s rouge bloodline? YEAH! And now, does he have to defend this title against the monster he just helped? YEAH!! But will Knight still reign this close to WrestleMania? Or will Braun #GetTheseHands back on a championship?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and it’s time for Knight’s biggest challenge, YEAH!

The bell rings and the fans rally up as the two circle. The two tie up, and Braun SHOVES Knight away. Knight comes back, Braun SHOVES him down again! Knight gets up, gets around, and he headlocks. Braun powers up to back suplex, but Knight lands out! Knight tries but Braun’s too big to suplex! Braun ELBOWS Knight, storms up on him, but Knight fires haymakers! Knight whips, Braun reverses, but Knight KICKS back! Knight runs, but Braun HIP TOSSES! Cover, TWO! Knight stays in this, but Braun brings him up. Braun puts Knight in a corner, CHOPS, then runs, for a SPLASH! Knight sputters along ropes, Braun keeps moving, but Knight DUMPS him out!

The fans fire up as Knight then WRECKS Braun with a dropkick! Knight keeps moving, and he WRECKS Braun again! The fans fire up with Knight, but then Braun BOOTS Knight down! The fans are torn but Braun stands tall as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Braun puts Knight back in the ring. The fans cheer as Knight KICKS Braun! Knight tries again, but Braun’s still too big to back suplex! Braun CLUBS Knight, then runs in at the corner. Knight BOOTS Braun, goes up, and FLYING BULLDOGS! Both men are down and the fans fire up! Knight and Braun rise back up, and Knight dodges a shot to JAB! Then he dodges to JAB! JAB! JAB! “YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!” But Braun KNEES low! Braun scoops, Knight slips free, and Knight RAMS Braun into buckles! Then the BACK SUPLEX! The fans fire up and Knight rises again! Knight spells it out, “L! A! KNIGHT! YEAH!” ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO!

Braun has plenty left in the tank but the fans rally for Knight. Knight stands Braun up to kick low, but Braun THROWS Knight away! Knight rises, and Braun LARIATS Knight up and out! The fans fire up as Braun rips the shirt! Braun gets on the track, and he runs in, STROWMAN EXPRESS MEETS JACOB FATU!! The Samoan Werewolf strikes Braun down!

Winner: Braun Strowman, by disqualification; LA Knight retains the title

The fans boo as Jacob now goes after Knight! He just ruined what was becoming a great match, but Jacob fires HEADBUTT after HEADBUTT on Braun! SAMOAN DROP onto the desk!! The desk doesn’t budge, but Braun might’ve been broken in half! The UK fires up for Fatu as he puts Braun in the ring! Jacob fires more HEADBUTTS, then HEADBUTTS away on Braun in the corner! The fans sing “OLE~ OLE OLE OLE, FATU~, FATU~!” Jacob runs corner to corner, but Knight kicks him first! Knight fires haymakers, “YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!” Jacob denies the BFT to POP-UP SAMOAN DROP! And then HIP ATTACK for Braun anyway!

Jacob keeps going, HIP ATTACK for Braun again! Jacob throws off his jacket, glares at Braun, and he runs in for a third HIP ATTACK! Braun flounders into the drop zone, so Jacob goes up, up, BEST MOONSAULT EVER! Direct hit on Braun, but the fans want that “ONE MORE TIME!” Jacob obliges, BEST MOONSAULT EVER! The Samoan Werewolf just tore up #OneBigSOB and LA Knight, will there be no stopping him from taking the United States Championship?

 

Backstage interview with Jimmy Uso.

Jackie Redmond is with #BigJim, and she says that while she knew WWE was going global this month, she did not know they’d get the slap heard ’round the world! Jimmy says he’d do it again, and he’ll slap Gunther as many times as he needs! Jimmy knows Jey is up in his own head, doubt is creeping on him. But just because Jey’s 0-3 against Gunther doesn’t mean Gunther’s unbeatable! The Ring General CAN be got! Jimmy’s going to Raw this Monday, he will bust Gunther’s ass, Jey will go to Mania and bust Gunther’s ass to become the WWE World Heavyweight Champion. And then they leave Las Vegas just like this: YEET!

Jimmy heads out, but then The Miz & Carmelo Hayes walk by. Miz is mocking Jimmy’s words, and he asks excuse me. Miz says it’s just funny that suddenly, Jimmy is a tough guy, even though for most of his career, he’s been “The Other Uso.” Doesn’t Jimmy get it? Jimmy and Jey are career sidekicks while Gunther is a main character. Gunther is the lead, neither Jimmy nor Jey can beat him. And here’s another thing: The Usos are just blips on the trailer that was Roman Reigns’ Bloodline. Melo says Jimmy & Jey are stuck outside the club, they can’t even get in.

Miz says as a former WWE Champion, a former WrestleMania main eventer, Jimmy will never know what it is to carry this industry. And after this year’s WrestleMania, neither will Jey. Oh, and by the way, if Jimmy ever slapped Miz like that, Jimmy would still be on the ground. Jimmy feints the slap and Miz freaks out. Jimmy says it may be him and Gunther on Monday, but he’ll holler at Aldis real quick so it can be Jimmy VS Miz here tonight. Yeah, YEET! Jimmy heads out, Melo says he thought Miz was gonna do something about the slap. Will Miz have to do something about running his mouth before he gets his teeth kicked in?

 

Solo Sikoa & Tama Tonga find Jacob Fatu backstage.

Solo asks Jacob what the Hell he was doing out there. Jacob goes out there alone without saying a thing to them? Jacob says he ain’t gotta say nothing to nobody! Matter fact, didn’t Solo not tap in with him last week? Tama says, “But Jacob,” only for Jacob to say, “But nothing, Tama!” Solo wants Jacob to lower his tone, but Jacob says okay. Let him be very clear with them. When it comes to Braun Strowman, Jacob WILL be the last man standing. Y’all better get in where you fit in, cuz that US title? Oh, Jacob’s bringing it home to the family. And he will do it with them, or without them! Yadada mean? Fatu heads out, is the Samoan Werewolf no longer following Solo?

 

Naomi speaks.

“I mean… How did we even get here? I don’t know. One thing that I do know is that I’ve always been the woman to do the right thing. I’ve always been the woman to do the right thing. So Bianca, what makes you think that my attack on Jade was anything different from me doing the right thing? When I sit here and I think about all that I’ve sacrificed, all that I’ve given, and that’s what really breaks my heart. Because through all of that, I’m made to be the bad one in this situation. I just don’t understand, how does Jade come in outta nowhere and take my place with you? I want you to ask yourself this, Bianca. Who inspired you? Hmm?

“Who’s inspired women over the last decade? Who’s always had your back from day one of you being here? Me. Not Jade. Hmm. But you know what? What I’ve learned through all of this: You teach people how to treat you. And I’m done with being treated as a third wheel. I’m done being pushed to the side, I’m done with being too nice, I’m done with being undervalued, underutilized, underappreciated! So moving forward, hmm… Moving forward, here’s my message to you, Jade. If you continue to be in my way, I strongly advise you to proceed with caution.” The Glow shows her dark side, but will the storm be moved?

 

Nick Aldis meets with Jade Cargill.

Speaking of, the SmackDown General Manager understands things have been rather difficult for her as of late. Jade says she’s been trying to get her hands on Naomi for the past few weeks, now where is she? No one has seen her all day, so as far as anyone knows, Naomi’s not here. Well, when Jade catches Naomi, it’s on sight. Jade leaves, B-Fab & Michin are there. They let her know that what Naomi did to her was straight trash, totally uncalled for behavior. And after Jade gets her hands on Naomi, she’ll handle that business. Jade agrees. Mia says they’ve all got business to handle. Jade’s got Naomi, and Mia’s gonna get Charlotte for messing with her girl, B.

B-Fab says Naomi’s got what’s coming to her: no sympathy, no regrets. Jade, just do what you gotta do. Oh, she will. Jade also wishes Mia luck tonight. Mia & B-Fab head out, will the Head Baddie in Charge make the Queen bow down in London?

 

The darkness approaches.

“You are as I was. As I am, you will be.” The shadows are starting to take shape, but is SmackDown about to fade to black?

 

Charlotte Flair VS Mia Yim w/ B-Fab!

The Queen looks down on everyone, so it’s no surprise that everyone else wants to take her down. Charlotte may have checked off B-Fab, but will the HBIC be a much different story? Or will Charlotte only sharpen her edge before facing Tiffany Stratton at WrestleMania?

WAIT! NAOMI ATTACKS B-FAB & MICHIN! Naomi drags Mia up for a FACEBUSTER! Naomi rains down fists, the ref reprimands and the fans boo, but Naomi tells the ref to back off. Naomi then BOOTS B-Fab off the apron! Naomi goes out after B-Fab to THRWO her into barriers! Naomi SLAPS B-Fab, tells her to stay down, but B-Fab gets up. Naomi fires hands, then she SMACKS B-Fab off the desk! Naomi rains down fists, but here comes Jade! Jade hurries down the ramp, she runs around the way, but Naomi runs away! Jade makes sure B-Fab is okay, but refs have to help her to the back. And what of Mia? Will she even be able to compete?

Charlotte makes her entrance, not really caring about what Naomi just did to Mia. But that means she also crosses paths with Jade. The fans like the look of this stare down, but Jade and Charlotte both let the other slide. Charlotte gets her pyro, and it seems she’ll still get her match. Will Mia be little more than an appetizer now?

The bell rings, and Charlotte BOOTS Mia down! Cover, TWO! Mia stays in this and the fans rally up. Charlotte just struts around while SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns, Charlotte has Mia down with a chinlock, but the fans rally up. Mia fights up, fires body shots, and she then blocks a shot to ROCK Charlotte! Mia ROCKS Charlotte again and again, then reels her in for a TORNADO DDT! The fans fire up as Mia hurries to cover, TWO! Mia drags Charlotte up, wrenches, but Charlotte says no to Da Feet! BIG back suplex! Mia stagger sup, Charlotte whips her, but Mia reverses! Charlotte goes up and out, BOOTS her away, then slingshots in and rolls Mia! Mia rolls through and BUZZSAWS! Mia runs corner to corner, but Charlotte avoids the cannonball!

Charlotte YAKUZA KICKS Mia down, then fires herself up! The fans “WOO~!” as Charlotte has Mia in the drop zone,. Charlotte steps on her, goes up the corner, but Mia gets underneath her! SIT-OUT POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO! Charlotte survives and Mia is shocked! Mia nods as the fans rally back up, and she brings Charlotte up. But Charlotte ROCKS Mia! Mia SOBATS, PELES, and then runs to PENALTY KICK! Cover, TWO! Charlotte stays in this, Mia grows frustrated, but the fans continue to rally. Mia uses that energy to stay focused, and she stalks Charlotte to waistlock. But Charlotte ELBOWS her away!

Charlotte CHOPS, and CHOPS, and CHOSP! Charlotte winds up, and she CHOPS again! Mia sputters, but then she dodges the boot! Charlotte is caught, and Mia hits a SAIDO! Charlotte flounders to a corner, the fans rally behind Mia, and Mia runs up, CANNONBALL! Mia hurries to wrench and EAT- NO, Charlotte shoves Mia away! Charlotte gets under, back suplexes, but Mia lands out! EAT DA FEET!! Cover, ROPEBREAK!! Charlotte’s long legs help her survive by a literal foot! Mia is beside herself while Charlotte bails out. Mia storms after Charlotte, runs up, but Charlotte dodges! Mia’s kick hits steel steps!

Mia hobbles away, goes to the apron, but Charlotte CHOP BLOCKS the bad leg out! Charlotte grabs Mia’s leg, drops a KNEE on the knee, but fans chant, “We Want Tiffy!” Charlotte just steps through, FIGURE FOUR, into FIGURE EIGHT!! Mia taps, Charlotte wins!

Winner: Charlotte Flair, by submission

Charlotte got more of a fight out of Mia than expected, but she still won. Will The Queen be more than ready to reign again after WrestleMania?

 

Backstage interview with Tiffany Stratton.

Jackie Redmond is with the WWE Women’s Champion and says Charlotte certainly looks confident. Let’s be real, Charlotte came at Tiff pretty hard. It got a lot of people talking. Tiff says yes, people talk. And Charlotte sure loves to hear herself talk. Ten years into the business and Charlotte is still so insecure that she can’t let a “rookie” get a word out. But last week, Tiff did learn something: She learned that walking into WrestleMania, she isn’t the one with something to lose. Truth is, if Tiff loses, then she lost to the great Charlotte Flair, as just a 25-year-old rookie with one year into SmackDown.

But if Charlotte loses… Well, then she lost to an “undeserving, delusional, unoriginal, backflip doing, blonde-hair-having, little girl.” Did she get it all? And Tiff can’t wait to hear the look on Charlotte’s face when they hear the words, “And STILL!” Then maybe Charlotte will finally shut up for the sake of literally everyone! They say what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, and Tiff will make damn sure what stays is Charlotte’s massive ego. Tiff is walking into and out of Mania as the WWE Women’s Champion. Tootles! Tiff heads out, will it still be #TiffyTime after WrestleMania?

 

Randy Orton VS Drew McIntyre!

The Viper told Cody how proud he was, but also how he wants the next shot after John Cena. The Scottish Terminator took offense to that, and basically said he is taking that shot instead. Will this match be an unofficial #1 contender’s match between these two former world champions?

SmackDown returns and McIntyre makes his entrance. The bell rings and the fans sing, “OH~, Drew McIntyre~!” and chant “R K O! R K O!” Drew and Orton circle, tie up, and they go around in a deadlock. Drew powers Orton to a corner, but Orton headlocks back. Drew powers up and out, then he runs Orton over! Orton hurries to ropes and Drew mockingly asks, “How’s the back feel, Randy?” Orton stands, he and Drew reset, and the fans duel some more. Drew calls for a knuckle lock, Orton accepts, but then Drew kicks low! Drew bumps Orton off buckles, then climbs up, but he panders for too long and Orton YANKS him down!

The fans fire up as Orton climbs now! Orton rains down fists, and the fans count to nine. Orton hops down, brings Drew around, and POSTS him for ten! Drew tumbles out of the ring, Orton goes out after him, and they’re by the desk! But Drew kicks Orton first and SMACKS him off the desk! Drew clears the desk, and he brings Orton up for the DESK- NO, Orton fights free! Orton turns things around, DESK BACK SUPLEX for Drew! The fans fire up while Orton leaves Drew behind, and SmackDown goes picture in picture.

Drew writhes on the floor, but Orton goes out to fetch him! Orton brings Drew around, UPPERCUTS him, then says one more time! DESK BACK SUPLEX! Drew writhes as that desk stays standing! Orton grins, refreshes the ring count, and then he storms up on Drew. Drew pokes Orton in the eye! Drew POSTS Orton now, then brings him around to RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP into barriers! Orton slumps down, and Drew also grits his teeth from that double-edged attack, but Drew fires up as he stands tall. Drew drags Orton up, puts him in the ring, then stalks Orton. Drew looms over Orton, and HIP DROPS him!

Orton sputters, Drew says one more time, and he winds up for the HIP DROP! Drew paces around Orton, says maybe one more time, and he pretends he can’t hear the fans. Drew winds up again, but Orton flips over! Hip drop meets kneecaps! And then Orton pokes Drew in the eyes! The ref reprimands but Orton rises up. Drew sputters and flounders, Orton ROCKS him with a right! Drew ROCKS Orton back! Drew storms up, Orton kicks low, but Drew fires another haymaker! The haymakers go back and forth, Orton gets the edge, but Drew GLASGOW KISS HEADBUTTS! Cover, TWO! Drew clamps onto Orton with an armlock!

SmackDown returns to single picture and the fans rally up. Orton fights up, pries at the chinbar, and then throws right hands! Drew CHOPS Orton in return! The fans “WOO~” and Drew winds up. Drew ROCKS Orton again, eggs him on, then CHOPS again! Drew shoves Orton to a corner, CHOPS again, then dares Orton to fight! Drew whips corner to corner, but Orton comes back to LARIAT! And LARIAT! Drew swings, Orton dodges, SNAP POWERSLAM! The fans fire up as Orton stalks Drew to the apron. Drew HOTSHOTS Orton first! Drew then runs in, but Orton puts him through the ropes!

The fans fire up as Orton has Drew for the DRAPING DDT! The fans fire up for Orton, and Orton hears those voices! Drew rises, but then Orton spots KEVIN OWENS! The Prizefighter is on the ramp, Orton glares at him, but then he turns around into a CLAYMORE!! Cover, DREW WINS!

Winner: Drew McIntyre, by pinfall

Kevin’s mere presence costs Orton, and now Drew has a huge win propelling him down the Road to WrestleMania! As for Orton, Kevin drags him out of the ring, SMACKS him off the desk, and then climbs up to join him! The fans boo but Kevin and his hot pink sneakers have Orton in position, but Orton slips free and TRIPS Kevin up! Kevin hits the desk then the floor! Orton staggers around, the fans rally behind him, and Orton stalks Kevin to the corner of the barriers. Orton lines up the shot! Orton runs in, but Kevin jumps over barriers! Security is there to stop Orton from pursuing, so Kevin runs away into the night!

The fans boo, but The Viper was that close! Will Orton be able to strike Kevin down and completely take him out?

 

Fire, thunder, smoke…

The force of nature is drawing ever closer. And he’s ready to fly! REY FENIX arrives next Friday Night SmackDown!

 

Jimmy Uso VS The Miz!

#BigJim gave Gunther a piece of his mind and a mark on his cheek, but it seems not everyone got the message. Will the Hollywood A-lister soon star in the Uso Penitentiary? Or will he prove Jimmy is NOT ready for a world champion level opponent?

The bell rings and the two tie up. Jimmy powers Miz to a corner, Miz turns things around, and the ref counts. Miz takes a swing, Jimmy ducks it to CHOP! And CHOP! Miz shoves Jimmy back, then runs up, but Jimmy TACKLES Miz! Jimmy rains down fists, Miz shoves him away to go to ropes, but Jimmy storms back up. Miz ELBOWS Jimmy away, then runs back up, only for Jimmy to LARIAT him down! The fans fire up while Jimmy storms up on Miz. Jimmy CHOPS Miz, has him in a corner, then whips corner to corner. Miz reverses, Jimmy goes up and over, then UPPERCUTS! Miz staggers back to ropes, but Jimmy is right on him.

Jimmy whips, Miz reverses and kitchen sink knees! Then basement BOOTS! The fans fire up, Miz scowls, and Miz KNEES Jimmy in the back again and again. Miz stalks Jimmy to the ropes now, and he CHOKES Jimmy! The ref counts, Miz runs, and Miz STRADDLE ATTACKS! The fans boo, but Miz runs again. Jimmy ducks the boot, then dodges a lariat! Jimmy runs up to LARIAT Miz up and out! The fans fire up and Jimmy builds speed, but Miz runs away! Jimmy smirks as he goes out the side, and UPPERCUTS Miz over the barriers! Jimmy makes sure Gunther knows he’s coming to get him, but SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and both men are down. Miz and Jimmy crawl, and Jimmy pounds the mat. The fans rally, Jimmy rises and runs up to LARIAT! And LARIAT! And mule kick! Jimmy then UPPERCUTS Miz, dodges a lariat, then SAMOAN DROPS! The fans fire up, Jimmy goes to the corner, “UCE! OH!” Jimmy runs in, but Miz puts him on the apron! Jimmy UPPERCUTS again! Jimmy climbs, leaps, but Miz gets under! Miz then waistlocks, ripcords, and MOVIE MAKER! Fans boo that blatant parody, but Miz full nelsons! Jimmy drops, victory rolls, TWO! Miz has the cover, TWO! Miz hurries to BASEMENT DDT! Cover, TWO!

The fans rally up as Jimmy survives! Miz stalks Jimmy, the fans rally up more, and Miz fires a KICK! And then another KICK! The fans say “YES! YES! YES!” to the It Kicks, but then Miz winds up. Jimmy ducks the buzzsaw, Miz blocks the superkick, but the DRAGON WHIP connects! Miz rebounds to B-MOVIE KNEE!! Cover, TWO!! The parodies don’t get it done, but Miz still has his original work to fall back on. The fans rally for “UCE! OH! UCE! OH!” Miz runs in, A-LIST LARIAT! Miz shoves Jimmy down, then springboards, but into a SUPERKICK! Jimmy hurries up top, for the USO SPLASH!! Cover, Jimmy wins!

Winner: Jimmy Uso, by pinfall

Miz may be a movie star, but Big Jim’s the one winning this main event! Jimmy then borrows Joe Tessitore’s headset to call out Gunther! He’s coming after dat ass on Monday! Gunther won’t be the ring general, he will be “Private Gunther,” and he will salute Big Jim! Uh, uh, YEET! Will Jimmy be the one making examples out of the World Heavyweight Champion? Or will everything come crashing down when Gunther gets his turn?

 

Drew McIntyre returns backstage.

And he says hey to Lewis Capaldi, the Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter, and also a big fan of Drew’s. They’re ready to have a good night in the pub, but Jackie Redmond walks over to congratulate him on the win tonight. She was hoping to get some thoughts on that victory and what happened with Orton and Kevin. Drew says it’s alright, this is what happens. He doesn’t care about anybody else’s business, but no one gets away with screwing him over. And when no one meddles in his business, he wins! Drew called out Priest, where is he? Priest doesn’t have the balls! So time to get mad in the pubs, everyone’s invited!

Drew turns the corner, but PRIEST IS THERE! Priest ROCKS Drew, SMACKS him off the door, then throws him into road cases! Priest ROCKS Drew, SMACKS him off the trunk of a car, and then again! Or since it’s London, “the boot.” The driver complains, but Priest BODY SLAMS that guy through a table! Drew comes back to KNEE Priest low, SMACK him off the trunk, and then off the side! They go to the hood, or bonnet for UK. Drew drags Priest up, but Priest CLAWS Drew’s eyes! Priest then sends Drew SOUTH OF HEAVEN through the windshield! Priest tells security that he’s done for now. Any more jokes, Drew? Didn’t think so! RIP, jackass!

Priest leaves, the producers hurry to help Drew, and Drew’s got glass in his eye! Will that glass help Drew see why he shouldn’t piss off the Punisher?

 

CM Punk heads to gorilla.

He has a security detail with him, and he passes by Drew writhing in pain. Punk chuckles, then continues on. Will his contract signing with Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins be just as brutal? We find out, after the break.

 

Nick Aldis is in the ring.

The SmackDown General Manager welcomes us back, and says it is his honor and privilege to be here in the O2 in London. Now, we all know why he and this table is here, and why additional security is here tonight. Tonight, we are here to sign a contract for a Triple Threat. Perhaps the biggest Triple Threat in the history of WrestleMania: Seth Rollins VS CM Punk VS Roman Reigns! The fans cheer all those names, and here comes the OTC! London puts the ones up, and Paul Heyman accompanies THE Tribal Chief out on stage. Roman raises his finger to the sky for the pyro, then security follows him to the ring.

SmackDown goes picture in picture as Roman’s entrance continues, and he raises his finger to the sky for the second round of pyro. Roman steps into the ring, SmackDown returns to single picture, and Heyman hands him a mic. The fans sing, “ROMAN! ROMAN REIGNS~!” Roman nods, the fans cheer, and now they chant, “O T C! O T C!” Roman tells London, “ACKNOWLEDGE ME!” The fans cheer again, and again chant, “O T C! O T C!” Roman smiles, but he sees the chairs are not to his liking. Heyman makes sure to put one at the head of the table. Heyman also dusts the chair off while Roman enjoys the singing of, “ROMAN! ROMAN REIGNS~!”

Roman takes a seat and says that was beautiful. The way they sing to their Tribal Chief, it’s just beautiful. The singing continues, and Heyman even joins in! Roman smiles, and he says that is what he’s talking about. That’s the OTC for you, baby! The biggest star on the planet! The OTC came here for two reasons. One: to be acknowledged; check! And two: to sign this contract. Roman does just that, and he says he’s checked both boxes. That means- “BURN IT DOWN!” Seth Rollins interrupts! The fans now sing, “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~!” Rollins struts out in his red wine paisley suit and conducts the O2 Choir all the way into the ring.

The fans cheer while Roman frowns, but Rollins takes the seat to Roman’s left. Rollins offers Heyman a chance to sing to this song, but Heyman frowns. Rollins chuckles, and he says the fans do have beautiful singing voices. He doesn’t know why Roman is in such a hurry to leave, though! This is their building! There’s a lot of history here! 12 years ago, they landed on the roof of this place in a helicopter! They came down those stairs over there, “ready to burn down the old guard!” They put the Undertaker down through the desk, and they were going to remake this company in their image!

Now don’t get him wrong, Rollins knows a lot has happened since then. They fought against each other, with each other, a little bit of love and a whole lot of hate. But Rollins dare says, as the fans continue to sing “WHOA~ OH~ OHH~,” that Rollins and Roman accomplished their mission. The fans start to chant for CM Punk, but Rollins tunes them out. Roman says, “We? We? You keep saying we. Our mission? We died a long time ago. It’s only been ME. You been here, but I done all the work! I’ve made this place what it is today! I took us to the level that we are here today! I made this place better than we found it!

“I’m the one that made us desirable to Netflix! I’m the one that took us into billion-dollar deals! Tell me, what have you done?” Rollins shouts, “I’ll tell you what I’ve done! YOU, YOU, YOU, it’s that mindset that keeps me having to screw you! You understand that? And your biggest mistake is not understanding the danger that’s right in front of us! The danger that’s right in front of you! You let the biggest snake in the world, CM Punk, into the garden! And you could’ve cut his head off at WarGames! But instead, you shook his hand. You could’ve let me finish him inside the cage at The Garden, but you didn’t. And now, I am left to do what I always do: Clean up your mess, again.”

Rollins drops his mic, picks up the pen, and signs his part. And now, here comes CM PUNK! The fans fire up and sing along with Cult of Personality, then join in on saying, “IT’S CLOBBERIN’ TIME~!” Punk goes to the ring, but as he grabs a mic, he goes up a corner, just like he did last Friday. “I have come here to chew bubblegum and sign a contract. And I’m all outta bubblegum.” The fans cheer the Rowdy Roddy Piper reference, and Punk hops down to take his seat on Roman’s right. Punk looks over said contract, but Roman asks if Punk needs a highlighter or something. What’s he doing? Just go to page four, clause five.

Punk does as Roman says, but Roman says Punk needs to hurry, this is precious TV time. Punk reads the segment, Roman tells Heyman to just smarten Punk up. Heyman tells Punk he knows what Punk is looking for. It is in there. They’re closing the show at WrestleMania. The fans go wild hearing that! Heyman tells Punk that he gets to live his dream of dreams. CM Punk will be a WrestleMania main eventer! The fans cheer and while Roman smiles, Rollins is furious. Roman says, “One man’s dream is another man’s favor! CHECK!” Wait, this was the favor? Rollins says no! This is not something to laugh at, and Punk does not get to tear up!

Punk is NOT deserving! He does NOT deserve this! The fans boo but Rollins continues to throw a fit! Main eventing WrestleMania is SACRED, the most important thing in the world to Rollins! More than anything! Except the fact that Punk NEVER gets to main event! This is all Roman’s fault! This is all Heyman’s fault! Rollins THROWS his mic down, paces angrily, but Punk picks up the mic. The fans cheer Punk on again, and Punk stands to thank London, to thank Chicago, to thank Louisville, Kentucky, and to thank ALL the fans. As corny as it sounds, he thanks the WWE Universe who stood by him and chanted his name for TEN LONG YEARS!

Roman says hold on, hold on. Punk shouldn’t be thanking the fans! He should be thanking the Tribal Chief! It is because of Roman that Punk gets this honor! So please, take this moment, close the show with that acknowledgement! Do this the right way. The credits are already rolling as Punk kneels before Roman!? Punk smiles, and he thanks “My Tribal Chief, the holder of the ula fala, the Head of the Table, the… Big Dog? Thank you for allowing a kid from Chicago to be graced by your presence. Thank you, My Tribal Chief, for allowing me to stand in your ring. And thank you so much. Thank you, Roman Reigns, so very much.

“But because of you, I will see you in the main event of WrestleMania.” And again, Rollins is agonizing over this. Punk finishes putting his signature on the contract, and London tells him, “You Deserve It!” Punk thanks Roman again, and then says, “But that’s not the favor that I’m owed.” WHAT?! Roman looks at Heyman and Heyman can’t look him in the eye! If getting this Triple Threat made into the main event isn’t the gift of the Wise Man, then what is?!


My Thoughts:

A good SmackDown, but they pulled off quite the paradox. They made it feel like they were struggling to fill three hours, yet they also filled the show to the point where that contract signing segment was almost bleeding over the three hour mark. Ironically, part of the problem was just how excited the London crowd was for this. The superstars still wanted to enjoy the chants and songs, but that’s time SmackDown doesn’t have to spare. It made the opening promo from Cody, Orton and Drew take longer, and it kinda did the same to the contract signing at the end. Even so, we still got a very good promo, and good stuff to set up Orton VS McIntyre.

Orton VS McIntyre was a great match, but of course Kevin costs Orton. McIntyre gets his win, Kevin and Orton have a bit of a brawl, but of course Kevin ends up on the losing end and runs off. McIntyre’s trash talk also comes back to bite him as Priest gets the better of him in their brawl. Here’s hoping Drew didn’t actually get glass in his eye, but that being the thing in kayfabe can be some good stuff. I can imagine McIntyre with an eyepatch, and he takes it off at the opportune time to get the better of Priest in their match. Also what a fitting choice for Punk to be passing by Drew suffering because of real glass.

Very good title matches tonight, but of course the status quo was kept. Pretty Deadly gets to look great here in London, but the Profits only just got the belts, they’re not going to be transitional champions like that. And Knight VS Braun was really good stuff, but honestly, Jacob Fatu going after them both should’ve been a given. Jacob also had a great promo with Solo & Tama to start adding to that divide between Jacob and Solo. I would hope Solo doesn’t screw Jacob out of the US Championship, but it feels like he will as Solo won’t stand for Jacob defying his authority, even though Solo’s been trying to make Jacob the champion all along.

Very good stuff from Jimmy Uso tonight, from his promo with #MeloDon’tMiz and then a great match with Miz. Their match ended up the de facto main event match, so that’s also great for both guys. Great win for Jimmy, but that’s likely because Jimmy is losing big time to Gunther on Monday. And it might just be me, but it feels like only now is the Jey VS Gunther build really moving, largely in part because Jimmy got involved. Jimmy’s promo after his match is something along the lines of what Jey should be saying. But I suppose as brothers, Jimmy is the one who knows Jey best and knows what Jey needs to be motivated again. And seeing Jimmy get beat up by Gunther will definitely motivate Jey…

Good final vignettes for Rey Fenix and Aleister Black. I’m a little surprised they confirmed Rey Fenix is showing up next week, and that they confirmed who Rey Fenix even is. I believe commentary confirmed Rey Fenix is Penta’s real brother, even namedropped “Lucha Brothers,” but all that is still surprising considering Fenix is going to start on SmackDown. Aleister’s vignette (at least I am fairly confident it’s his) was giving us glimpses of his silhouette, but I think there was usage of AI in the snake imagery. It was fine they did it for El Grande Americano because that is all trolling, but they really should try and do things the old fashioned way of photoshop and stock imagery.

Very good stuff in the Women’s Division tonight, though the WWE Women’s Championship portion was the weaker. Naomi’s got a great Heel persona going, her promo was great, and her going after B-Fab & Michin over them supporting Jade was a great detail. Jade runs Naomi off, helps B-Fab, but there was no helping Michin in being fed to Charlotte. Tiffany had a decent promo, and it does fit how Charlotte kept her from speaking so she finally gets things out here. It didn’t really add that much, though, but they already gave us a great brawl so not sure what more they can give.

KC Squared VS The Secret Her-vice was a very good match, but of course Chelsea made sure her team won. A Six Woman Tag of Zelina & KC Squared VS The Green Administration is certainly coming, to help give us Zelina VS Chelsea for the Women’s US Championship.

My Score: 8.7/10

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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 3.27.2025

Bad news out of the TNA management side, but this is a taped episode from El Paso! So we won’t see any of the fallout just yet!

Published

on

Now we all heard the news about the TNA change in hierarchy, and I…have no positive outlook on that. Delirious sucked at booking and creative in the dying days of ROH before it got bought as a B show. Dreamer having even more control is concerning because his ideas the last two years haven’t been much better.

Gail leaving makes more sense to me. Be it firing or a “you can’t quit, you’re fired” kind of situation, the Knockouts division is the worst it’s been in a long time and Gail was close with Scott D’Amore. So I don’t think Gail parting ways is as big of a problem since TNA has slowly been bleeding out with the Scott faithful.

Granted, I think the next few shows were already taped before the firing so things shouldn’t be completely unwatchable for at least a week or two. So let’s see where we’re going.

Ratings:

  • Gigi Dolin & Tatum Paxley vs Elegance Clique w/Personal Concierge: Ash wins via Rarefied Air – ** 1/4
  • Fir$t Cla$$ & Frankie Kazarian vs Laredo Kid, Octagon Jr & Chavo Guerrero Jr: Chavo wins via Gory Bomb into Frog Splash – *** 1/4
  • Jacy Jayne vs Masha Slamovich: Masha wins via Russian Death Device – ***
  • Eric Young w/two losers vs Ace Austin: Eric wins via Piledriver – ** 1/2
  • Seto & Mokuba – I mean – Nic Nemeth w/Ryan Nemeth vs Leon Slater: Nic wins via Danger Zone – *** 1/4

 

Results:

Gigi Dolin & Tatum Paxley vs Elegance Clique w/Personal Concierge

Ash and Gigi start off, Gigi with a little Rascalz after her first takedown. So both her and Wentz are making it obvious something’s going on between them, and I’m not mad at it. Good for my man Wentz.

Tatum and Gigi get some quick tandem offense in, Ash does manage to scurry off to a tag and Heather gets bent into a Pretzel. Some kind of Inverted Tarantula from Tatum, Gigi tags in, Bronco Buster on Heather followed by Kawada Kicks. Heather sells against the ropes, Gigi goes for a Hesitation Dropkick, but Concierge pulls her away so Gigi crashes and burns. Ref is distracted, Ash gets in some cheap shots and then the Elegant duo starts working over Gigi. A few quick tags, but once Heather comes in, Gigi fights out of the corner, gets the hot tag to Tatum. Tatum stacks up both Elegance members, Corner Stacked Crossbody, Butterfly Suplex and an Elbow Drop with some some flare. Tatum goes to the top rope, Heather pulls Gigi off the apron, Concierge shoves Tatum off the turnbuckle and Ash hits Rarefied Air for the win.

Post match the Elegance Clique wants to make their wish with the cake, they light the candles and Tatum and Gigi recover enough to do what we all expected last week, the cake in the face spot. Some…suggestive licking from both of our Hot Topic Hotties, so…no complaints here. 

Fir$t Cla$$ & Frankie Kazarian vs Laredo Kid, Octagon Jr & Chavo Guerrero Jr

Chavo and Kaz start since he’s King Petty, a quick rope run turns into a Headscissor from Chavo. Kaz recovers, they lock up, Kaz hits the Knee Lift during the lock up to tag out to KC. KC pulls off some athletic dodges, gloats a bit so Chavo waits, measures and nails a gorgeous Dropkick. Laredo comes in on fire, quick high spots that send KC bouncing around like HBK against Hulk. KC powders after sells the Satellite Takedown, AJ checks on him and we go to commercial.

Back from commercial, Octagon is lighting up KC’s chest with overhand chops, he perches, Sunset Headscissor Flip from corner to corner, KC tries to Back Drop him but Octagon does a headstand, kicks KC away and lays him out with a high spot. AJ gets on the apron to stop Octagon from running the ropes, the referee has a stroke or something because he stops paying attention and AJ pulls Octagon out of the ring and chucks him. KC with the Tope con Hilo and tag (tag ropes haven’t mattered since the 80s we all know this). So AJ is getting taunted by the crowd in Spanish, but he’s manhandling Octagon since it looks like a Child fighting their parent. AJ knocks off Chavo and Laredo, Laredo pops up and tries to get involved but he’s caught on the shoulders, Octagon goes for the Crossbody but gets caught and AJ pulls off “World’s Strongest Wasteland” but Chavo breaks up the pinfall. AJ throws Octagon into the corner, Tennessee Whiskey, and tag out to KC. KC hits a few moves, but starts to lose the momentum until he connects with a Super Kick. Simultaneous rope run into the Dueling Crossbodies, so we get the timely tag outs from both sides. Kaz and Laredo come in, Laredo lands like two moves before Kaz hits a Sole Butt, Lariat and eats his lunch. KC and Kaz try to double team Laredo but he fights out and the crowd is chanting for Chavo.

Chavo tags in, and he’s rocking KC, Saito Suplex, Low Bridge to AJ, Reverse the Whip so Chavo goes to the corner and perches, KC feeds, Chavo Backflips to safety, rolls through and lays out KC. Chavo is feeling himself, 3 Amigos start on KC but only 2, Kaz comes in and Chavo switches to Kaz for the Amigos, only 2 again before AJ breaks it up. AJ goes for the disrespect, but Chavo counters and hits the 3 Amigos on the biggest Culero. Aztec Warriors dive to stop AJ and Kaz, KC tries a Dirty Victory Roll but Chavo kicks out. GORY BOMB into FROG SPLASH!

Chavo looked fantastic and he’s the one in the best shape in the ring. I wouldn’t be mad at more Chavito. 

Jacy Jayne vs Masha Slamovich

I expect very little from this match.

Collar and Elbow, gator rolling for the first 30 seconds or so, then Jacy goes to some Hair Pull takedowns and does a little taunt before Masha pops back up and hits a Lariat into a Dive. Jacy sells it like she’s really hurt, even the ref tries to hold Masha back a little before Masha gets annoyed and just grabs her, Masha throws her in, looks for a Dive and Jacy sees it and powders. Masha tries to go back to the well for the Dive again but Jacy hits the Uppercut and then an Apron Run PK to drop Masha. Forearms rain down into a Foot Choke as Jacy continues to arrogantly play to the crowd. Another Foot Choke into a Cannonball, and near fall.

Masha gets space with a Sole Butt, tries to snap off Requiem but Jacy fights off, fights through a Sunset Flip another effective PK keeps Masha on her ass. Jacy looks for a kinda half-assed Camel Clutch as Masha is fighting up, but Jacy runs her into the corner, gets distracted mouthing off to the crowd, so Masha recovers, 5 Hole Up Kick sends Jacy into the corner, Yakuza Kick into Capo Kick for two. Requiem attempt again, but Jacy pushes off, a little back and forth, Masha tries a Backslide but Jacy gets away and hits a V-Trigger but only a 2 count. Jacy looks for the Discus Punch but Masha ducks it, they strike back and forth, but some dodges from both leave the exchange more even. Jacy with the Front Kick to the face sends Masha to the outside. Jacy wants another PK, but Masha blocks, Electric Chair Apron Snake Eyes. Masha throws her in, a PK into a near all. Requiem attempt 3, and thwarted from Jacy with a Superkick into a Neckbreaker. Senton misses from Jacy, Buzzsaw Kick, into Spinning Back Kick and Russian Death Device for the win.

Better than I expected, and Tessa attacks as soon as the bell rings. Xia Brookside and Lei Ying Li make the save after Tessa grabs the belt. 

Eric Young w/two losers vs Ace Austin

Ace and Eric tie up, World of Sport start but as soon as Ace starts to get away EY punches him in the face. Eric looks at the camera and says “This is what trust looks like”, turns his back on Ace, when Ace looks to attack, the loser duo cut him off. EY takes advantage of the weird situation, but Ace with some Up and Over quick spots, into an Inside Cradle and La Magistral. EY kicks out of the quick flash attempts, but eats a Dropkick, and Ace goes all Speed Kils on him with fast strikes and then a face buster for another near fall. Strike spot very early in the match, Ace gets the best of it, goes for a Tear Drop Suplex but EY sits on it to block, Headlocks to keep him close and then a snap Lariat into beatdown bully tactics. EY takes the referee’s attention and one of the nerds punch Ace in the face.

Eric tries to lean on Ace, but Ace fires, a few strikes, Click Click Boom, the Miz Seated Lariats in the corner, Mochizuki Triangle Kick connects! Only a 2 count, but Ace seems to be in control. Ace puts EY on the ropes, a few strikes to keep him rocked, wants a Superplex, but EY blocks, bites the face and Macho Elbow gets a very close two count. EY tries the Piledriver but Ace turns it into a Jacknife Cradle,Spinning Heel Kick, calls for The Fold, but the losers hop on the apron to distract, Ace attacks them. Ace tries to time out the Triangle Kick again, but Eric dodges, throws Ace head first through the buckles. As Ace stumbles out of the corner, Piledriver, and it’s over.

Oh look it’s the “we’ll hear from Joe Hendry” segment. Again, I’ve loved this gimmick since Day 1, even didn’t hate his What Culture Pro stuff, but there is such a thing as milking a cow too much. 

Elijah interrupts the whole “Who’s next” speech. When Elijah comes out he says he’s not the challenger and he believes in Joe. The crowd wants Elijah to turn on Hendry. Elijah pauses for a moment, and starts proving his friendship with stating his favorite color and a little “You Got a Friend in Me”. The crowd is into singing along and waving their cameras like Lighters to a 30 year old song. THANKFULLY Kaz breaks up the hug fest. Now he gets the “Culero” chant. 

Kaz pulls out a Bass…what the hell is this Jam Session. Kaz has to warm up so he plays “La Cucaracha” on the bass. Kaz…is a national treasure. Hendry kicks Kaz out of the ring after his Heelish and playfully racially charged song choices. Kaz tries to sow dissension, but Joe and Elijah pinball Kaz between them. Kaz slips a power move and tries to shove Elijah into Joe but Elijah puts the brakes on, a small tense moment. But then Joe and Elijah play “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey, Goodbye”…and that goes right into a commercial. Oddly…perfect.

Nic Nemeth w/Ryan Nemeth vs Leon Slater

Nic shoots the half immediately for a flash pinfall but Leon kicks out at one. Nic continues to keep things grounded with his amateur wrestling skills, and then does a little Dolph Ziggler show off. So Nic isn’t really taking this seriously, and Leon starts getting the best of things with an Arm Wringer, into drag, Shoulder Tackle and rope run as Nic tries to Leap Frog and Leon puts on the brakes and just shoves Nic on his ass. Nic gets annoyed, a few strikes, grinds his face along the ropes, but Leon keeps stringing some offense together, Back Handspring Elbow into his Corner con Hilo.

Ahh the classic formula of the commercial gives the heel the advantage, Twisting Suplex from Leon stops Nic’s offense momentum, right hand, Leon lifts Nic up for something, Nic slips it, kicks him in the gut, looks for the FameAsser, but Leon catches him into a Blue Thunder Bomb variation. Slater wants the Swanton 450, but Nic powders. Leon tries to adjust into a Dive, but Nic cuts him off, counter for counter and a FameAsser out of the counters for a two count. Nic starts the big brother tactics, bootwashes and arrogance, Slater fires, punches into a Yakuza Kick. Leon wants another Lethal Injection variant, but Nic catches him into a Rear Naked Choke. Slater tries to turn it into a pin so Nic breaks it. Leon wants a Leg Lariat but misses and gets unceremoniously dropped by Nic. Nic puts Leon up on the buckles, Superplex possibly but Slater counters, tries to collect himself for a move, but Nic falls into the ropes to crotch Leon, and finally hits the Superplex.

Twist of Slate from Leon, Swanton 450 but knees get up. Locomotion Cradles from both but they kick out, Ryan picks the ankle to trip up Leon just a touch and then Danger Zone ends the match.

Ryan starts the post match beatdown, but the Hardy’s music hits and they come down to the ring for the save. Matt challenges the Nemeths for Rebellion because they’re not medically cleared yet.

 

Overall Score: 6.5/10

Decent story motion, no match was offensive, and there was actually some solid match action for television standards. I don’t have a ton to complain about aside from the Knockouts Division is in a weird spot, and giving Hendry a lot of just talking and hollow payoff segments feels stupid. If we need to hear from him every week, give him a talk segment like Highlight Reel or something. Yes I know First Class just got The Penthouse, but if Hendry is going to talk more than wrestle, give him a talk segment for us to sink our teeth into.

There was the announcement that Xia, Lei Ying and Masha will face Tessa, Jacy and a mystery partner. So you gotta wonder if there’s going to be another NXT mercenary, a surprise return or if it’ll just be Rosemary since she’s got her issues with Xia. Also I just realized that Unbreakable is going to be on a Thursday, seemingly after iMPACT? I’m gonna have to see how they do it, because if there’s an Impact episode and 2-3 hour PLE…I do not want to be awake until 1am. People need to work, and I will be Unwakeable if things go that long.

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

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CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

Classic POD is WAR


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